THE ROLE OF MEN IN Fostering

Fostering, and caring for children and young people, can wrongly be perceived as a woman’s role. Not only can men be foster carers, but their role in a fostering household can be an extremely important one.

One myth that we hear time and again is that to create a family, foster carers need to be a heterosexual married couple. And that the man’s role is one on the periphery, offering support, only when needed.

This is false.

Every family is different. Families come in all different shapes and sizes. It can consist of one person, or a houseful of people. To foster, and to create a family for a vulnerable young person, men can play varying roles. Men may foster as a single carer, or jointly in a same-sex couple, part of a civil partnership, married or living with a partner.

Male foster carers are often a young person in care’s first positive male role model. The impact of this can not be underestimated. A male foster carer, who is a loving and stable presence, can give a child the chance to build trusting relationships with men. This early experience can be vital in shaping that young person’s future interactions - with men, or as men - as they grow older and ultimately make their own way into the world.

Mark, a single male foster carer, said: “Many of the boys in my care have missed out on having a male figure present throughout their lives. But they value that commitment so much.

“I would say to any guy, give it a try. Set aside all the perceptions and preconceived ideas that you have and just give it a go. You’ve got nothing to lose by trying, but you’ve everything to gain.”

At Action for Children, we support all types of foster carers, such as single male foster carers, as well as men who are the primary carer in their fostering household. Time and again we have had the opportunity to wit- ness that men and women can embody the core skills of a foster carer, such as an ability to love, to show em pathy and compassion, resilience and stickability.

There is no one-size-fits-all foster carer. Each of our children are unique and have a different set of needs. And so, we need carers from all walks of life, men as well as women, of all ages and from different back grounds.

When you apply to foster with Action for Children, we assess the individual. We look at you as a person and explore the skills and experience that you have to support a child or young person.

Every family is different. But the one thing they should have in common is love. If you have space in your life –and your heart – to offer a child or young person a safe and loving home, we would love to hear from you. Call 028 9046 0500, email fostercareni@actionforchildren. org.uk or visit actionforchildren.org.uk/fostering