The Big Move By Kate Gostick
You only ever regret the things you don’t do, and I didn’t want to live a life of regrets. So when my husband, Dominic, was offered a job in America, we decided it would be a fun adventure for a couple of years.
I
always painted naked, but for a pair of old grey knickers, I saved for painting and a hotel shower cap to prevent getting paint in my hair. It never really mattered because the house backed onto fields that were not used, so nobody was ever there. Even in the rooms in the front of the house, our windows faced the courtyard, some garages beyond, and a walled garden beyond that, so I was safe to lead a nudist life with paint roller in hand. I was painting the one plastered wall in the conservatory, thinking of how I had my dream job and how we had only just finished building the conservatory and a new beautiful inglenook fireplace with a log burner, making the house just perfect. Was I making the right choice to leave this behind? I had almost bought James a school uniform for a school I knew he would not go to. We had been here before when Dominic had had a job offer rescinded at the last minute, so giving up James’s place seemed so risky. It was frightening for me, and I struggled to let go of the safe and familiar life we had built. In the end, a woman I hardly knew who had heard from a friend of a friend that we may be moving told the school, and I had to give up his place before I was ready. For some reason, other people, however distant from you, still think your choices are their business. In this way, your environment tries to restrain and control you, either pushing you away before you are ready or using guilt to pull you back. As my paint roller mover up and down the wall, I could only think of what I was losing, be it drinking tea in the conservatory watching the kids play in the garden or having the chance to take a first day of school photo of my children in an oversized school uniform with room to grow. I didn’t know then that all this would be eclipsed by new
130
LANCASHIRE & NORTH WEST MAGAZINE
exciting adventures that would allow us all room to grow. It takes a lot of willpower to break free and let go, but when we had done it once, it became easier for our other moves. I climbed the ladder and placed the paint tray on the top step, clutching the roller in my right hand. I adjusted the shower cap and started to roll. As I stretched to get the top bits, my boobs squished into the paint on the lower walls and formed a strip framing the upper edge of my nipples. This was why I painted naked. My boobs always became embedded in the paint like handprints on the walk of fame! I have that kind of chest that enters a room five minutes before I do and always seems to be on every man’s eye level, be he 4 foot 8 or 6 foot 8. Despite me being on the next to top wrung of the ladder and my boobs, therefore, being about ten feet off the ground, they still seemed to be at eye level for the window cleaners as they unlatched the gate and came into the back garden. Our eyes met a second after their eyes met with my paint framed boobs and greying example of M&S’s finest. All of them managed to hide the shock of what had just happened as one of them asked me if I wanted them to add cleaning the new conservatory to their existing routine. I replied, “that would be wonderful”, finished the last bit of the wall, pretending that I had no problem with what had just happened, as they started to soap up the glass, partly I feel, to hide my modesty. Maybe, now was the right time to leave the country! We decided that we needed to be confident that this next job was for real, so we decided Dominic would go out first for a few months, and I would follow on later with boys once we knew our situation was secure. Those few months were chaotic, to say the least, as I continued to work whilst preparing for an international move on my own with two children under five. Dominic had emigrated (escaped) ahead of our departure. During those eight months, I flooded the garage, ran out of petrol in the middle of nowhere and split James’s head open when I pulled the boot/trunk down on his head. The difference in words between American and British English was to cause www.lancmag.com
