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Are You Doing Something Wrong? [Jamie Barnes] Some attorneys’ personalities just don’t mesh well with those of a particular firm. What should you do when this kind of personality clash occurs with your firm?
You’ve worked at the same law firm for six
Managing Partner. He liked shaking hands
partners, most of them in their mid to late
months. Work is okay, but you’re confused.
and patting people on the back and chatting
40s. There were even older partners as
Why are people so slow to become friendly?
with the female support staff and generally
well, but they seemed out of the mix, off to
They smile (sometimes), and then go about
conducted himself in the same breezy, care-
meetings or sitting in one of the conference
their business and hardly notice you. Vari-
free manner as he had throughout his life.
rooms with a client but not joining in much.
ous groups go to lunch together and only
Occasionally, he would hear muffled laughter
occasionally are you invited. The partners
Mark was given a desk in a small office to
coming from the end of the hall. The Manag-
seem standoffish as well. You sense long-
share with a 25-year-old female attorney
ing Partner had two or three buddies among
established hidden networks of interpersonal
who had started just weeks before Mark’s
the other partners. Mark began noticing little
relationships but you can’t quite figure how
arrival. He greeted her with a big smile
cliques among the more senior associates
they interrelate and how you fit. You wonder,
and hand shake and noted that she seemed
as well. And some of the partners seemed to
“What is going on here?” On a more personal
initially cool but assumed she would lighten
have favorite associates whom they visited
level, you ask yourself, “Am I doing some-
up when she got to know him better; but this
with often either to chat or drop off work. His
thing wrong?”
did not happen.
office mate had evidently become part of a
Mark’s Dilemma After clerking with a federal judge in Ohio,
Within weeks, he found himself putting in
women and four men in this group. As far
14-hour days with his office mate. His per-
as he could tell, their affinity seemed built
Mark, 27, joined one of New York City’s
sonal assessment of her was not unkind. She
around politics. They bantered and teased
most prestigious firms. Mark attended a
seemed reserved, passive almost, pretty in
each other constantly. Three of them could
small Midwestern liberal arts college on full
an average sort of way, nice enough; but she
often be heard talking at once as they left for
scholarship, where he played varsity football
spoke little. He wondered about that but said
lunch.
and was President of his college fraternity.
nothing. He preferred up-beat, non-threat-
Following his undergraduate career, Mark
ening talk of sports and current events. He
One day, Mark had an early-morning ap-
went onto Harvard Law School, where mem-
also did not like gossip nor did he participate
pointment with a client in New Jersey and
bership on Law Review was among his many
in it. Given a choice, Mark preferred to think
returned to Firm X around ten a.m., two-and-
accomplishments.
positively.
a-half hours later than usual. The offices
Based on his academic success and out-go-
What puzzled Mark about his office mate
ing personality, Mark received offers from
was that she made friends easily. People
every firm with which he interviewed. He was
stopped by her office often to say Hello. She
He remembered his first day at work, walking
the type of gregarious high achiever whom
would frequently leave with the same group
from office to office, laughing, saying some-
interviewers believed could one day be a
for lunch. How was this quiet, unassum-
thing uplifting, smiling, winking, cracking
major ‘rain maker.’
ing woman succeeding where he, who had
jokes. Mark was not by nature introspective,
always been popular everywhere he’d been,
but now he thought he understood: he had
was failing?
single-handedly tried to change the mood or
group of younger associates. There were two
were dead quiet. Suddenly he understood.
On Mark’s first day at Law Firm X, without
How could he have been so blind?
culture of the firm. Worse, he had tried to do
prompting, he did what came naturally: he walked around to all the offices and cubicles
Mark noticed other things. The Managing
this not from a position of power but as an
and with a big smile introduced himself to
Partner’s office was at the end of the hall,
outsider, one who had yet to be embraced as
everyone from the janitor right up to the
and grouped on either side were various
part of the group. As a result, the group had
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