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SUITABLE FOR SENSITIVE EYES
Thoughts
“I have made a lot of mistakes falling in love, and regretted most of them, but never the potatoes that went with them.”
OFFSET
—NOR A EPHRON, Heartburn
2 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
Photograph by David Prince
The story you’ll
tell for years begins as one single moment. TM
Get the guide at Colorado.com
E d i t o r ’s N o t e
I love eating, and I like cooking—when I have the time—but food isn’t at the center of my universe, and I have little patience for complicated recipes full of unfamiliar ingredients. (My husband is the opposite. I marvel—and despair—at how he can use every pan, bowl, and knife in the kitchen, albeit with very impressive results.) That’s why I’ve always loved the approach to food that Real Simple takes: The focus is on making delicious, healthy meals without a lot of prep time and with a not-too-long list of ingredients that you can find at your local grocery store. We even have a column called The Staple (page 27), which helps you use up whatever ingredient you have too much of (because how did we end up with three bottles of ketchup?). Real Simple is also pro-eating. That may sound a little silly, but with so many messages out there about what not to eat, it’s refreshing to focus on enjoying what you do eat. This month’s Food Issue also celebrates gathering with friends around a meal. “Entertaining” sounds like a lot of work, but our editors put their heads together to help put everything you need for a fun and delicious time right at your fingertips. Check out the tools and tips in our feature, “The Lost Art of the Last-Minute Party” (page 92), and this summer you’ll feel carefree as you holler, “Hey, let’s all go back to my place to eat.”
I
Real SimpleÕs editors are busy planning our second annual Real Simple Home. Our pro designers are creating a beautiful, functional (and shoppable) home. That’s me in the study of last year’s penthouse, above. This year we’re decorating a townhome at the Park Court Collection in the Park Slope neighborhood of Brooklyn, New York. Look for our big reveal in the October issue!
4 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
’M NOT A FOODIE.
Follow me on Twitter @lyazel and Instagram @leslieyazel
P h o t o g r a p h b y C h r i s t o p h e r Te s t a n i
Isn’t it time saving started feeling a little more like earning? You work hard to save money, your savings account should work hard for you. This is why Capital One® offers customers one of the nation’s best savings rates. Stop by a location or go online today. Welcome to Banking Reimagined®
Offered by Capital One, N.A. Member FDIC. © 2019 Capital One.
LUSTERTONE ICONIX ™ STAINLESS STEEL SINK
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ELKAY ® LUSTERTONE ICONIX STAINLESS STEEL SINK WITH PERFECT DRAIN ® Express your desire for clean, simple design with the new Iconix stainless steel sink. Its sophisticated shape keeps wine glasses upright, while its sleek, smooth finish protects the surface from everyday wear and tear—so you can achieve a modern yet timeless look. Explore the design at elkay.com/iconix.
© 2019 Elkay Manufacturing Company
Contents July 2019
92 The Lost Art of the Last-Minute Party
O N T H E C OV E R
Tomato-Burrata Toasts (recipe, page 110)
The Food Issue Easy Summer Recipes 27, 32, 106, 118, 126, 128 A More Organized Kitchen 63 Last-Minute Dinner Ideas What to Eat to Feel Better
92, 118 85
Cover Photograph by Greg DuPree Food St yling by Chelsea Zimmer Prop St yling by Claire Spollen
J U LY 2 0 1 9 R E A L S I M P L E
7
Contents
17
21
126
Fun items to splash around with
Sweet-smelling hand sanitizer
A spice blend you’ll put on everything
Thoughts
2
the realist
Editor’s Note
4
How to Safely Light a Sparkler
Real Simple 24 /7
10
Your Words
12
The Short List
14
what we love 17
Inspired by Water Pretty Smart Beauty buys to save your sanity New Uses for Old Things Cardboard boxes
21
24
Little Helpers Clever items that make every day better 26 The Staple Ketchup
27
31
Cooking School Learn to create flavored ice cubes
32
Real Simplifier How to pack a cooler
34
Organize This Make your outdoor grill area more orderly 36 This Old Thing? How to buy and sell used furniture online 38 Road Test Air-dry hair products
42
New Ways to Smell Good Pretty fragrances that do double duty 44 Drugstore Insider The best beauty products, handpicked by a pro 48 Now What?!? Solutions for life’s mini disasters
50
Summer Style Under $50 Score a deal on sundresses, sandals, and more The Essential Bermuda shorts styled three ways
52
56
relating 5 Times We Felt Proud to Be Americans True stories to inspire your patriotism 60 Good Read Ruth Reichl on the virtues of a simple kitchen 63 Modern Manners Catherine Newman offers advice
66
Pet Tricks Keep your pets cool
68
How to Bury a Grudge Let go of lingering tension that might be holding you back 70
balance
features
3 Money Moves to Retire Early Smart decisions to take care of future you 77
The Lost Art of the Last-Minute Party From necessary supplies to etiquette tips, we get you ready to stress less and host more. Plus: three minimal-effort menus that will give your impromptu party maximal style 92
5 Steps to a More Organized Work Life Feel refreshed and productive 80 Making It Work How do you manage medical appointments and records for your kids and parents? 82 Gut Feelings Why more of us are having stomach trouble after eating, and what to do about it 85 Ahhh Take a breather
91
food 5 Easy Dinners
118
Big Batch All-purpose spice rub
126
Better for You Raspberry-chia jam
128
for fun 12 Sunscreen Innovations I’d Like to See
130
REAL SIMPLE (ISSN 1528-1701) (JULY 2019) (VOLUME 20/ISSUE 7) IS PUBLISHED MONTHLY BY TI GOTHAM INC. TI GOTHAM INC. IS A WHOLLY OWNED SUBSIDIARY OF MEREDITH CORPORATION. PRINCIPAL OFFICE: 225 LIBERTY ST., NEW YORK, NY 10281-1008. PERIODICALS POSTAGE PAID AT NEW YORK, NY, AND ADDITIONAL MAILING OFFICES. POSTMASTER: SEND ALL UAA TO CFS (SEE DMM 507.1.5.2); NONPOSTAL AND MILITARY FACILITIES: SEND ADDRESS CORRECTIONS TO REAL SIMPLE MAGAZINE, PO BOX 37508, BOONE, IA 50037-0508. CANADA POST PUBLICATIONS MAIL AGREEMENT #40069223. BN# 13200211RT001. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. PRINTED IN THE U.S.A. CUSTOMER SERVICE AND SUBSCRIPTIONS: FOR 24/7 SERVICE, PLEASE USE OUR WEBSITE: REALSIMPLE.COM/MYACCOUNT. YOU CAN ALSO CALL 1-800-881-1172 OR WRITE REAL SIMPLE, PO BOX 37508, BOONE, IA 50037-0508. REPRODUCTION IN WHOLE OR IN PART WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED. YOUR BANK MAY PROVIDE UPDATES TO THE CARD INFORMATION WE HAVE ON FILE. YOU MAY OPT OUT OF THIS SERVICE AT ANY TIME.
8 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
Tropically delicious and
FULL OF NUTRITION. This kiwifruit is
SWEETER than the green edition. An enchanting journey, so VENTURE
OFF YOUR LIST. Zespri SunGold has a flavor you simply can’t resist.
Let Your Taste Wander.
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Real Simple 24/7 FOLLOW US ONLINE FOR E XCLUSIVE IDE A S, TIP S, A N D W AY S T O M A K E L I F E E A S I E R — E V E RY D AY.
MEET
BET TY GOLD S E N I O R D I G I TA L F O O D E D I T O R AT R E A L S I M P L E .C O M
Because nobody likes a complicated skin-care routine, we rounded up the best fuss-free face masks and peels for your next night in.
Favorite seasonal dish: Homemade pesto, made with plenty of farm-fresh basil using a mortar and pestle.
Read more at realsimple .com/facemasks.
Simple pleasures: Bear hugs, sunshine, and warm socks fresh out of the dryer. I’m happiest when I’m: Sweating profusely—there really is no limit to the power of endorphins. @BETTYROSEGOLD ON INSTAGRAM
Our favorite cleaning supplies Whether you plan to deep-clean your home or give it a quick once-over, these 25 best-selling items will help. Shop the supplies at realsimple.com/cleanitup.
#RSCOOKINGSCHOOL Cook along with us! Follow @rscookingschool for our latest and greatest food and drink recipes. Inspired to re-create a dish you see? Show off your skills by tagging your photos with #rscookingschool.
At-home workouts P I N T E R E ST @REALSIMPLE
Want to sculpt your abs or score toned arms à la Jennifer Garner? We have the fitness moves you need. Get motivated at realsimple .com/workitout.
1 0 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
Open
and tap
for Fourth of July recipes.
TWITTER @REALSIMPLE
FAC E B O O K @REALSIMPLE
S N A P C H AT @ R E A L S I M P L E M AG
I N STAG R A M @ R E A L _S I M P L E
C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P L E F T: C O U R T E S Y O F B E T T Y G O L D ; T E D + C H E L S E A C AVA N A U G H ; B R I A N H E N N ; V I C T O R P R O TA S I O ; G E T T Y I M A G E S
S E L F- C A R E MADE SIMPLE
Yo u r W o r d s
What kitchen skill has been most useful to you?
Weighing my ingredients for baking. More accurate, less messy! @ N YC B U N
Hitting a measuring cup or spoon with a shot of nonstick spray before pouring in sticky or goopy ingredients, like honey or peanut butter. Ingredients slide right out, leaving the measuring utensil slick as a whistle. @ANNELISE7586
# R S L OV E
“A RO O M I S N ’ T J UST A L I V I N G S PAC E ; I T ’S A K E E P E R O F O U R M E M O R I ES.” @ L I T T L E M S. M AG N O L I A
Parchment paper is magic. Will never bake kiffles without it again. Cleanup is a breeze. RACHEL STROHL, BETHLEHEM, PENNSYLVANIA
The best skill in the kitchen, and anywhere else, is a sense of humor. L. SCHUER
Being willing to try new things. My mom taught me that you can change up any recipe. And don’t be afraid to put things together in a way others might turn up their noses at. It might be good! LAURIE CARR, RICHMOND, INDIANA
Mise en place is the French term for having all your ingredients prepped, cut, and measured before you start cooking. Using this skill in the kitchen makes cooking quick and easy, and you feel like you’re starring in your own cooking show. MARY BETH OPENSHAW, SCOTTSDALE, ARIZONA
How to make eggs. They are so versatile, they’re always on hand, and pretty much everyone likes them.
Using the slow cooker! BETH STOKES, CENTRAL POINT, OREGON
Making a simple roast chicken. Every Monday morning after I drop my kids off at school, I bust out my well-seasoned cast-iron pan and get to roasting. It gives us a nice meal that night and enough leftovers for one or two more dinners that week. @ERICAFELIX STYLIST
SHEENA GREENBERG, PHENIX CITY, ALABAMA
Opening a bottle of wine. PAT F E R R I G N O, W I N T O N , C A L I F O R N I A
1 2 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
My knife skills. Confidence in the kitchen is preceded by comfort, which these skills provide me with. No fear of chopping, slicing, or dicing! MICHELLE McCREADY, PORT WASHINGTON, NEW YORK
[Real Simple food director] Dawn Perry showed me how to move the avocado, not the knife, when cutting an avocado in half. It saved me from cutting off a finger. @SULLMOM3
Teaching my daughters how to cook. They became my sous chefs and now cook for me! Taking chocolate chip cookies out of the oven two minutes earlier. They stay moist and fluffy. @BREEJOHNSON PHOTO
Knowing how to separate eggs, beat egg whites, and fold in ingredients so they hold up well. I could make a chiffon cake or mousse in my sleep thanks to my mother’s training. @MIR_GORO
The Instagrammers who shared the photos on these pages will receive our Find Your Balance special edition. Want to be considered for this column? Tag photos on Instagram with #rslove.
Knowing how to delegate. My husband is a much better cook than I am, so I let him focus on that. And when it comes to cleaning up, I’ve tried to train my kids to help by doing the cleanup job I hate the most: emptying the dishwasher. MAUREEN POWERS, CHICAGO
Putting a wooden spoon on a pot of boiling water to prevent it from boiling over. HEATHER SEASHORE, LITTLETON, COLORADO
REBECCA DRAZDOWSKI, MOUNTAIN TOP, PENNSYLVANIA
I wax my stovetop once a month. It really makes spills an easier job. NANCY RAAB, OCEAN CITY, NEW JERSEY
Organize your utensils as you load your dishwasher. I learned this years ago from one of your articles, and it makes me feel so accomplished when I’m unloading. @MGRIFFICE
Taking a shortcut but then adding something special. Stirring some savory spices into the brownie batter or doctoring a can of pasta sauce with wine, fresh garlic, spices, and sautéed veggies can make a quick dish taste delicious.
# R S L OV E
“AS PA RAGUS R I SOT TO P R E P ! ”
NEXT QUESTION... What’s your best organization tip for fall? Send an email to yourwords@ realsimple.com and let us know your answer to this question. Your response could appear on these pages.
AMY LERITZ, SAINT LOUIS
Being able to make a piecrust from scratch. There is just something so special about knowing that the whole pie is homemade. D E A N N A DY E R , L E W E S, D E L AWA R E
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The Short List F I V E B O O K S T H AT W O N ’ T D I S A P P O I N T By Elizabeth Sile
Literary thriller
Fascinating history Gretchen McCulloch’s Because Internet is not your English teacher’s grammar guide—not even close. Self-described internet linguist McCulloch traces how the web has changed the way we communicate— whether through emoji, lowercase letters, or cat memes— and makes a compelling, entertaining argument that this change is good for the English language as a whole.
Parents in a wealthy town find out their public school system is about to get even better. The new Crystal Academy magnet will cater to “exceptional learners” entering sixth grade who pass an aptitude test and portfolio review. As the pressure to get in rises, relationships unravel and parents and kids behave very badly. Bruce Holsinger’s The Gifted School is a propulsive story about class and parental one-upmanship.
Original debut Arresting reportage For eight years, Lisa Taddeo moved around the country, embedding herself in the lives of three American women with drastically different sexual experiences to understand their deepest and sometimes darkest desires. The resulting work of literary nonfiction, Three Women, is an emotionally powerful and narratively enthralling portrait of these women’s— and indeed many women’s—wants, needs, pains, pleasures, and heartbreaks.
When Abigail Sorensen was on the cusp of 16, her brother went missing, and she was mailed the first chapter of a book that promised to change her life. Over the next two decades, she sporadically received the rest. Now Abigail is invited to a retreat to “learn the truth” about the book, leading her on a journey to deeper truths about her brother and herself. Jaclyn Moriarty’s Gravity Is the Thing is a quirky novel with a lot of heart.
For more book recommendations, visit realsimple.com/newbooks.
1 4 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
P h o t o g r a p h b y Te d + C h e l s e a C a v a n a u g h
P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y H E AT H E R G R E E N E F O R H E L L O A R T I S T S
In Kalisha Buckhanon’s Speaking of Summer, a woman is consumed by her search for her missing sister. One winter night in Harlem, Autumn Spencer’s twin, Summer, goes onto their apartment roof and vanishes without even leaving footprints in the snow. When police dismiss Summer’s disappearance and stop looking for leads, Autumn’s obsession spirals. This is a pageturning mystery with much to say about race and family.
Great for book club
© 2019 Tyson Foods, Inc.
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E V E RY T H I N G O U R E D I T O R S A R E B U Z Z I N G A B O U T T H I S M O N T H
I F YO U R S U M M E R P L A N S H A V E A N Y T H I N G T O D O W I T H W A T E R — S P L A S H I N G I N I T, L O U N G I N G B Y I T, D R E A M I N G O F I T — T H E S E G O O D S M I G H T B E J U S T W H A T YO U N E E D .
P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y H E AT H E R G R E E N E F O R H E L L O A R T I S T S
By Cat Dash
DIVE IN
This 35-millimeter waterproof camera will help you achieve your minimal-screen-time goals while still capturing memories (even underwater). TO BUY: Underwater Camera, $24; poketo.com.
P h o t o g r a p h b y Te d + C h e l s e a C a v a n a u g h
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W H AT W E LO V E
4
2 3
1 Personalize this speaker with a custom pattern and laser-etched text.
5 6
7
3 C H A R I TA B L E T O T E
1 LUX E L O U N G E R
The terms “chic” and “pool float” have rarely been used together—until now. TO BUY: XL Float IZU, $50; thenicefleet.com. 5 SURF’S UP
Personalize the cover of this notebook with the text of your choice for a custom travel journal. TO BUY: Learning to Surf Notebook by Lauren Hampton, $16; minted.com.
1 8 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
2 TA I L O R E D T U N E S
Customize every detail of this waterproof speaker, from the fabric to the color of the oversize volume buttons. TO BUY: myBoom 3 Speaker, $180; studio.ultimateears.com. 6 SUMMER ESSENTIAL
Let the graphic designs on these organic cotton towels inspire you to get outside and play. TO BUY: Atlas Blue and Latigo Bay Beach Towels, $39 each; westelm.com.
Fifty percent of the cost of this canvas tote will go to Charity: Water, a nonprofit that provides clean drinking water to those without access to it. TO BUY: Madewell x Charity: Water Reusable Canvas Tote Bag, $10; madewell.com. 7 R A I N P RO T E C T I O N
This water-resistant coat is made from 25 recycled plastic water bottles. TO BUY: The ReNew Anorak, $88; everlane.com.
4 B A BY S H A R K
A fun way to keep your little one (ages 1 to 2) buoyant in the pool. TO BUY: Sharky Float Vest, $35; sunnylife.com. 8 DOUBLE THE FUN
Photographer Gray Malin’s aerial images adorn both sides of this 500-piece puzzle. TO BUY: The Beach Two-Sided Puzzle, $25; graymalin.com.
B E A C H T O W E L S : P E T E R A R D I T O ; P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S
8
T H E O R I G I N A L S O U T H E R N O U T F I T T E R TM
shop online at
S O U T H E R N M A R S H .C O M
no table is set without sparkles.
© 2019 glacéau. glacéau®, smartwater ® and label are registered trademarks of glacéau.
W H AT W E LO V E
Pretty Smart H A N D S A N I T I Z E R T H AT M A K E S S K I N H A P P Y ( N O T D RY ) , P L U S S E V E N O T H E R B E AU T Y B U Y S T O S AV E YO U R S A N I T Y
P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y H E AT H E R G R E E N E F O R H E L L O A R T I S T S
By Heather Muir Maffei
TOUCHL AND P OWER MIST HAND SANITIZER S
Wave goodbye to harsh, goopy sanitizers and hello to these fast-evaporating, nonsticky, lightly scented (lavender! watermelon!) mists. You get 500 spritzes in one handbag-friendly bottle. TO BUY: $12 each; touchland.com.
P h o t o g r a p h b y Te d + C h e l s e a C a v a n a u g h
J U LY 2 0 1 9 R E A L S I M P L E
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W H AT W E LO V E
S O L D E JA N E I RO M Y S O L S T I C K S P F 50
Even makeup newbies will ace their eyes with this palette. It has a primer (upper left), plus lid, crease, and liner shades. The four shimmers and four mattes come in warm, coppery hues. TO BUY: $49; dior.com. THE RIGHT TO SHOWER BAR SOAPS
These look cool, and the sulfate-free, vegan formula cleanses nicely. The best news: Unilever is donating 100 (!) percent of proceeds to help people living on the streets get access to showers. TO BUY: $8 each; amazon.com. INDIE LEE I - R E C OV E R M I N D & B O DY G E L
Massage this lightweight gel, with arnica, pepper, and menthol, into tight shoulders or a stiff back to feel relief (and a soothing warm-cool sensation). TO BUY: $48; indielee.com.
The founder created this for her rheumatoid arthritis flare-ups.
2 2 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
This 80-minute water-resistant sunscreen stick makes application easy and smells like dessert (you’ll want to reapply!). Swipe where you need extra love: face, lips, ears, hands and feet—and tattoos. TO BUY: $26; soldejaneiro.com. MAGICSTRIPES EYELID LIFTING STRIPS
A painless, temporary fix for droopy or hooded eyelids— place the sticky side above your crease for an invisible lift. You can even wear shadow over them. TO BUY: $26 for 64 strips; magicstripes.com. AV E E N O ALMOND OIL BLEND HAIR MIST
Got thick, coarse, or curly hair? Spray this oil onto damp or dry hair to tamp down frizz. TO BUY: $9; walgreens.com. N Y X P RO F E S S I O N A L MAKEUP FILL & F LU F F E Y E B RO W POMADE PENCIL
In eight matte shades, this teardrop liner creates naturallooking strokes to fill in sparse spots. The tiny paddle brush blends seamlessly. TO BUY: $11; nyxcosmetics.com.
T O P S M E A R : B R I A N H E N N ; P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S
D I O R B A C K S TA G E E Y E PA L E T T E # 0 03 AMBER NEUTR ALS
insiders
W H AT W E LO V E
New Uses for Old Things
Cardboard Boxes YOU’ VE GOT MAIL! AND WE BE T SOME OF IT ARRIVED IN A B OX. R E I M A G I N E T H E H U M B L E B R O W N PA R C E L W I T H T H E S E F O U R H A C K S . By Brandi Broxson
KIT TY S C R AT C H I N G POST
PA I N T E R ’ S PA L E T T E
Little artists will feel like pros with this makeshift paint wheel. Cut out an oval, then carve openings for fingers and thumb.
G I F T TA G S
Cut out a square, rectangular, or round piece of cardboard and cover some or all of it with washi tape. Punch a hole in the top and add ribbon for an easy, inexpensive present topper.
D R AW E R O RG A N I Z E R
Those box dividers that separate breakables also work well for organizing socks and underwear. Or make your own with cardboard strips.
Recycle cardboard scraps responsibly with the guide at realsimple.com/recycle.
24 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
Photographs by Corey Olsen
P R O P ST Y L I N G BY M EG A N K I A N TO S
Using sharp craft scissors, cut cardboard into three-inch-wide strips. Roll the strips into a circle, gluing the ends as you go, until you reach your desired width. Top with catnip.
W H AT W E LO V E
N E X T- L E V E L C O Z Y
S L E E P- C O O L PA JA M A S
No more sweaty nights. Snooze comfortably in this soft and cool-tothe-touch rayon lounge set with pretty grosgrain trim. Even better, the shorts have pockets. TO BUY: Cool Nights Swing Cami, $30, and Cool Nights Short, $32; soma.com.
This stainless-steel container keeps a standard beer bottle cold and carbonated for up to six hours (really—we tested it!). The attached cap has a built-in bottle opener for quick opening. In five colors. TO BUY: BottleKepper X, $45; bottlekeeper.com.
Little Helpers S I X S M A RT P RO D U C T S TO M A K E YO U R L I F E E A S I E R
This silicone tag is quiet, scratch-resistant, and durable. Personalize for free with your pet’s name and your contact info. Pop in the dishwasher for easy cleaning. TO BUY: Qalo Silicone Dog ID Tag, $25; qalo.com.
By Brandi Broxson
KIDS’ BIKE HELMET
A blinking LED rear safety light makes this adjustable helmet stand out from the pack. An inner liner keeps winged insects away, and 11 vents keep kids cool on hot summer days. Good for ages 1 to 8. In three patterns. TO BUY: Lil Champ Helmet, $40; lemhelmets.com.
T R AV E L K N I F E K I T CORN PEELER
Let us guess: The kids want the kernels off the cob, right? This dishwasher-safe tool removes kernels quickly and safely with a stainless-steel blade that won’t rust. TO BUY: OXO Good Grips Corn Prep Peeler, $7; oxo.com.
26 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
Have a set of dependable tools at the ready when picnicking, camping, or staying in a vacation rental. Includes a large serrated knife, a corkscrew knife, a vegetable peeler, a cutting board, and a microfiber cloth. TO BUY: Opinel Nomad Cooking Kit, $85; opinel-usa.com.
O P I N E L K N I F E K I T: P E T E R A R D I T O ; P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S
N O - C L I N K D O G TA G
Quick Ideas
The Staple There are plenty of reasons to keep ketchup on hand even if you don’t use it on your burgers and hot dogs. Slow-cook pork in a tangy mixture of the sweet sauce, fresh tomato, and vinegar for tender pulled pork that’s perfect for a tableful of guests. Simmer tofu and broccoli in a takeoutinspired glaze. Or whisk ketchup with fresh dill and olive oil and toss with crunchy summer vegetables for a salad your kids will thank you for.
1 TO M ATO - B R A I S E D PORK
Season a 2 1/2-lb. boneless pork shoulder with 2 tsp. kosher salt and 1 tsp. black pepper. Brown in 2 Tbsp. oil in a large skillet, turning as needed, for 15 minutes. Transfer to a slow cooker; add 1 chopped tomato, 1/2 cup ketchup, and 1/4 cup red wine vinegar. Cover and cook on high until tender, 5 to 6 hours. Skim and discard fat and shred pork with 2 forks. 2 S W E E T-A N D S O U R TO F U
Heat 2 Tbsp. canola oil in a large nonstick skillet over high. Add 1 block drained, cubed extra-firm tofu and 3 cups broccoli florets; cook, stirring, until browned, 6 minutes. Add 1/2 cup ketchup, 1/4 cup each tamari and honey, and 3 Tbsp. rice vinegar. Cook, stirring, until bubbly, 2 minutes. Serve over rice. 3 SUMMER SAL AD WITH TO M ATO V I N A I G R E T T E
P R O P ST Y L I N G BY M EG A N K I A N TO S
Whisk 2 Tbsp. each ketchup, chopped fresh dill, red wine vinegar, and olive oil with 1 Tbsp. water, 3/4 tsp. kosher salt, and 1/2 tsp. black pepper in a large bowl. Add 3 cups halved cherry tomatoes, 1 sliced cucumber, 1 sliced red onion, and 5 oz. mixed greens. Toss to coat. Learn the secret to pouring ketchup without spattering at realsimple.com/ketchup. B y D a w n Pe r r y Recipes by Robin Bashinsky
Photograph by Corey Olsen
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U N C O M M O N S O L U T I O N S T O E V E RY D AY P R O B L E M S
P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y H E AT H E R G R E E N E F O R H E L L O A R T I S T S
H OW TO SA FE LY LI G HT A S PA R KLE R Hold the sparkler at arm’s length, at least six feet from another person, and ignite the tip with a long-reach butane lighter, says Julie Heckman, executive director of the American Pyrotechnics Association. Once the sparkler is lit, tip it upright, perpendicular to the ground, and keep holding it away from your body. Heckman says it’s safe to use the lit sparkler to light additional sparklers, one at a time. Sparklers are best for those ages 12 and up; they should be used outdoors and only if they’re legal in your municipality (check with your local department of public safety). Find an open space where sparks can’t ignite brush or anything close to your home. A concrete driveway is ideal, but if you opt for the lawn, consider first wetting down the grass with a hose. Have a bucket of water on hand to dip used sparklers into. Allow them to cool for at least half an hour before throwing them away. By Kristine Gill
P h o t o g r a p h b y Te d + C h e l s e a C a v a n a u g h
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THE REALIST
Cooking School R E F R E S H Y O U R R E G U L A R I C E W I T H T H E S E T A S T Y ( A N D R E A L LY P R E T T Y ! ) C U B E S J U S T I N T I M E F O R T H E S U M M E R H E A T. By Ananda Eidelstein
LEMON GINGER
Why settle for plain frozen water when you can elevate a cocktail, a pitcher of lemonade, or a glass of seltzer with these creative cubes? They deliver subtle flavor and fun bursts of color. Each mixture that follows makes about 12 1-inch or 6 2-inch ice cubes. We freeze ours in silicone ice cube trays; the flexible material makes it easy to pop out the cubes once frozen. Plus, they’re dishwasher safe. TO BUY: Tovolo Ice Mold Trays, $12 for 2 1¼-inch trays or $9 for 1 2-inch tray; amazon.com.
Divide halved lemon slices and 1 4-inch piece fresh ginger, thinly sliced, among the cups of an ice cube tray. Top with water or coconut water and freeze until solid. Try in iced tea.
BL ACK COFFEE Divide 2½ cups cooled freshly brewed coffee among the cups of an ice cube tray and freeze until solid. Try in iced coffee or cold milk.
CUCUMBER HERB
Whisk 2 cups freshly brewed black coffee or black tea with ½ cup sweetened condensed milk. Divide among the cups of an ice cube tray and freeze until solid. Try in iced coffee or iced black tea.
Divide sliced seedless cucumber among the cups of an ice cube tray. Top each with a few small mint leaves or a sprig of thyme; top with water and freeze until solid. Try in a gin and tonic.
S U M M E R B E R RY Mash 1 cup chopped strawberries or blackberries until mostly smooth. Divide among the cups of an ice cube tray. Place a halved berry in each cup; top with water and freeze until solid. Try in seltzer.
GREEN OR HERBAL TE A
M O R E F RO M O U R K I T C H E N Find videos, lessons, shortcuts, and strategies to help you get dinner (and breakfast, and lunch, and dessert) on the table with ease at realsimple.com/cookingschool.
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Steep 4 bags green tea or herbal tea (such as hibiscus or chamomile) in 2 cups boiling water for 5 minutes. Strain and let cool. Divide among the cups of an ice cube tray and freeze until solid. Try in lemonade.
Photograph by Victor Protasio
F O O D S T Y L I N G B Y C H E L S E A Z I M M E R ; P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y C H R I S T I N E K E E LY
VIETNAMESE COFFEE OR THAI ICED TEA
New Zealand Table Wine, ©2019 Whitehaven Wine Company USA, Healdsburg, CA. All rights reserved.
THE REALIST
Real Simplifier
How to Pack a Cooler L O A D Y O U R O N - T H E - G O F R I D G E C O R R E C T LY A N D YO U ’ L L S AV E O N I C E , K E E P P E R I S H A B L E S C O O L F O R L O N G E R , A N D N E V E R E AT A N O T H E R S O G GY S A N D W I C H . By Maggie Puniewska
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MATCH THE CONTAINER TO T H E O U T I N G
MA XIMIZE CHILL
PA C K S T R AT EG I C A L LY
STORE IT IN THE SHADE
S LO W D O W N I C E M E LT
Aim for about a 2-to-1 ratio of ice or gel packs to product, says John Maldonado, director of product design at the cooler brand Igloo. Start freezing gel packs at least 24 hours in advance so you don’t leave pockets of liquid on the inside, which spurs melting, says Michael Pimpinella, a packing manager at HelloFresh in New York City. Fill plastic containers with water, freeze them, and pop out the slabs of ice. Or chill large water bottles, which can double as refreshing drinks later. Chill your cooler in a large fridge or freezer, or at least bring it inside— you don’t want to pack ice in a hot container.
Put large ice blocks on the bottom—they melt slowly and generate cold longest. Then add proteins and dairy. (For longer trips, pack proteins frozen; they act as bonus ice blocks and should thaw in a few days and be ready to cook.) Add more ice or gel packs, then drinks and items like guacamole and mustard, followed by another layer of ice. Top with soft items, such as sandwiches. The FDA advises keeping a thermometer in your cooler if storing perishables; food should be at or below 40 degrees Fahrenheit. Bringing drinks only? Fill the cooler with ice and a half cup of salt. “Salt water has a lower freezing point, and the cold water will touch the beverages at every point, whereas cubes leave pockets of air,” says Daurio.
Keep your cooler as chilly as possible while en route. “It’s not always practical, but putting it in the air-conditioned car as opposed to the trunk should slow down ice melt,” says Maldonado. When you arrive, leave it in a shady spot. If trees aren’t around, don’t keep it in the car—on an 80-degree day, the temperature inside a car can reach nearly 110 degrees in just 20 minutes. Instead, bring it outside and throw a light-colored blanket or towel on top to keep the temperature from climbing. An emergency blanket (with the reflective side facing out) makes a handy shield too, says Daurio.
Once your cooler is firmly planted, keep the lid tightly shut and limit how often it’s opened. “A cooler’s worst enemy is changes in the air temperature inside, and opening it a lot will raise the temperature,” says Daurio. During one-day trips, resist the urge to pour out any melted ice—the water is actually an insulator that helps keep the remaining ice chilly, says Pimpinella. If you’re using the cooler for a few days, you can drain the water, but fill the extra space with new ice and gel packs. “Excess air can promote heat transfer and melt the remaining ice faster,” says Pimpinella. If you’re low on ice, fill gaps with newspaper or Bubble Wrap to help eliminate air pockets.
For one-day excursions that include a lot of walking, opt for a soft-sided cooler, which is light and easier to carry. It also lets you squeeze out air, which will help keep everything chilled, says Mike Daurio, store manager of REI in Chicago. Hard-sided containers typically have better insulation, making them good for longer trips, when food (especially perishables) needs to be kept cool for a few days. Choose a container that’s about two inches thick—the thicker the insulation, the better it cools. High-end brands, like Yeti and Pelican, offer soft-sided coolers that can manage longer trips; in the case of coolers, a higher price does tend to mean better chilling capabilities.
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Illustrations by Adam Cruft
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1 M A K E A B A R B ECU E B I N
W E G R I L L E D P RO F E SS I O N A L O RGA N I Z E R B E T H P E N N FO R T I P S O N A R R A N G I N G B A R B E C U E S U P P L I E S. F I R E U P T H E C O A L S ! By Mar y Honkus
2 CORR AL TO OL S
Store oversize spatulas and tongs in a clear, lidded container (measure first to make sure they’ll fit), and stash them in the cabinet above the fridge. Or hang them from adhesive hooks mounted on the inside of a cabinet door. TO BUY: InterDesign Storage Organizer Bin with Lid, $21; amazon.com. 3 S TO W AWAY 2 1
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If you’ve got the space, keep your grilling essentials in a weatherproof storage cart. Prep your food on the work surface above, and house your apron and oven mitts in the cabinet below between meals. TO BUY: Suncast Serving Station Patio Cabinet (similar to shown), $134; homedepot.com. 4 K E E P S U P P L I E S D RY
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Stash charcoal in a watertight container to keep it usable even after summer storms. TO BUY: Behrens 6-Gallon Galvanized Steel Trash Can, $16; lowes.com. 5 S TO R E S E A S O N A L LY
At the end of the grilling months, pull the slow cooker out from the back of the cabinet and put your BBQ supplies there instead. Shopping for a new grill? Choose from this year’s best at realsimple.com/grills.
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Photograph by Br yan Gardner
O R I G I N A L K E T T L E P R E M I U M C H A R C O A L G R I L L 2 2 " , $ 1 6 5 ; W E B E R . C O M . W Ü S T H O F B B Q T O O L S S E T, $ 1 0 0 ; W I L L I A M S - S O N O M A . C O M . P R E M I U M T O O L S E T, $ 3 3 ; W E B E R . C O M . H AY PA N I E R O VA L S T E E L B R E A D B A S K E T S , $ 5 5 E A C H ; S T O R E . M O M A . O R G . D A N D E L I O N S T R I P E T E A T O W E L , $ 2 8 ; M I N N A - G O O D S . C O M
Organize This
Stock a utensil caddy with essentials—napkins, flatware, and condiments—for easy transport from the kitchen cabinet to the backyard table. TO BUY: Carson Flatware Caddy with Leather Handles, $40; crateandbarrel.com.
Every space is filled with untapped possibility. To fit more than you can imagine. To function better than you’d believe. From custom shelving to all-purpose storage, the transformation begins at The Container Store.
Brave new heights and widths in your garage.
Enjoy free Elfa® Installation on spaces over $750 through June 30th. ©2019 The Container Store Inc. 43429
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W H E T H E R YO U R O U T I N E LY
This Old Thing? S E C O N D H A N D S M A RT S : A N I N S I D E R ’ S G U I D E TO BUYING (AND SELLING) FURNITURE ONLINE By Petra Guglielmetti
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shop for secondhand furniture online or routinely wonder why anyone would bother, you already know: This is the Wild West of internet retail, where sketchy listings, shifty characters, and scarce rules are just part of the game. But those who know how to play that game can walk away with gold. While Craigslist doesn’t look much different than it did in 1995, new apps and sites are making buying and selling secondhand furniture more user-friendly, and more shoppers are discovering the perks of decorating with upcycled pieces. “Vintage furniture can cost 70 to 80 percent less than new furniture and is often better made,” says Anna Brockway, cofounder and president of the resale site Chairish. Plus, broken-in items let you lend character to a room without the pressure of showroom shopping. “Buying used is one of the best ways to try new styles on for size. It’s a much smaller commitment than buying something full price and waiting 12 weeks for delivery,” notes San Francisco designer Eliza Kern. Whatever you’d like to bring into (or take out of) your home, these insider strategies will help you navigate the complex world of furniture resale and come away with exactly what you want.
Illustrations by Clare Owen
Choose Your Platform Craigslist is a favorite source because of the sheer quantity of users and listings, but other sites provide buyer-protection features and are much easier to browse. “Different sites have different strengths, so it’s a good idea to search all of them,” says Marian Parsons, a designer based in Rochester, Minnesota. “Etsy and eBay tend to have higherquality pieces, but the prices are also much higher. Facebook and Craigslist have more of a yardsale or thrift-store feel, so you can find more bargains, but there’s also more junk to wade through.” (More on that later.) Nextdoor, Facebook Marketplace, and local garage-sale groups on Facebook are arguably the friendliest starting points for newbies, since they’re not totally anonymous (you can see a seller’s or buyer’s name and photo) and it’s easy to message people to ask questions or arrange a pickup (no need to exchange email addresses or phone numbers). If you’re scouting for cool vintage or designer pieces and prefer to pay a site instead of a person, check out the curated listings on Chairish and Everything but the House. You can either pay for shipping or search by zip code to find items available for local pickup. Also worth a look: AptDeco, which offers popular brands at steep discounts and inexpensive local delivery (currently available only
“Vintage furniture can cost 70 to 80 percent less than new furniture and is often better made.”
in New York, New Jersey, and Connecticut). Apps like 5miles, OfferUp, and Letgo make shopping or selling easy via sleek, photo-driven posts; many of these apps also have smart features, such as identity verification and in-app messaging. Which source works best for you will depend largely on availability and popularity in your region.
Consider Your Location The type of furniture listings you’ll find will vary by location— you might want to search nearby cities or towns. In large cities and their suburbs, it’s easy to score great deals on nearly new pieces from popular furniture brands, thanks to people relocating frequently. In rural areas, you’ll often have more luck finding antiques and rare items that have been stashed in someone’s attic for a few generations.
Search for Brand Names Run a couple of quick searches for your go-to furniture brands. “You’d be surprised how many items you can find from favorite brands that are barely used,” says Sarah Reed, co-owner of Arbor & Company, a design and homestaging firm in Portland, Oregon.
Some brands currently reselling like crazy are West Elm, Urban Outfitters, CB2, Crate & Barrel, Ikea, Room & Board, Restoration Hardware, and Design Within Reach, according to Kalam Dennis, cofounder of AptDeco.
Get Descriptive To zero in on treasures that fit your style, include descriptive words in your search. They could describe a style of design (“modern,” “art deco,” “farmhouse,” “Scandinavian”) or a material or texture (“tufted,” “pine,” “leather,” “brass”). “You’ll start to see new names and terms pop up,” says Kern, “so don’t be afraid to branch out.” Not sure where to start? Browse a high-end vintage site, like 1stdibs, or the vintage section of One Kings Lane to find items you love, and then search related terms on local resale sites to see if you can score better deals.
Cast a Wide Net It also pays to do less specific searches. Say you want a midcentury modern dresser. A seller may not include those exact words, so try “dresser,” “wood dresser,” and “vintage dresser” as well, suggests Parsons. “Listings are only as accurate and specific as the seller writes them, and sometimes people don’t know how to
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Know When to Haggle describe what they have.” Savvy shoppers also search synonyms (“wardrobe,” “armoire,” and “cabinet”), different word spacings (“nightstand” and “night stand”), and common misspellings (“Anthropology” could bring up a gorgeous, overlooked Anthropologie piece). Items can also get posted in the wrong category, so search all listings rather than just the furniture section.
Use These Keyboard Tricks On Craigslist, the vertical bar means “or” (“cabinet | wardrobe | armoire”), and a hyphen helps eliminate words from the results; for example, typing “-computer” may reduce the number of office-liquidation computer desks that pop up while you’re shopping for a chic home-office makeover. Use quotation marks if you want to search for an exact phrase— enclosing “coffee table” in quotes will help prevent dining tables from also appearing in your results.
Be Ready to Pounce If you’re pursuing a specific item, check for new postings at least once a day. Facebook Marketplace saves your recent searches in the search bar so you can quickly update the results. If you’re waiting for a particular piece to surface on Craigslist, save a search to easily rerun it whenever you hop back on your computer. While there’s no official Craigslist app, you can employ a third-party app called CPlus or use the site ifttt.com/classifieds to customize alerts for specific listings.
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When a hot item appears, the seller could get a dozen messages at once. Make yours stand out by sounding straightforward, decisive, and ready to act. Say you can pick up and pay for the item that afternoon. Save any questions for when you’re going back and forth with the seller to arrange the pickup, since you can still back out at that time if needed. (On auction sites like eBay, however, be sure to ask questions before you win.) If a listing includes a phone number, try texting in addition to emailing; many sellers will see texts first.
If a listing has been live for more than a couple of days, go ahead and submit a best offer. “Don’t be afraid to offer less than the asking price, especially if you notice that the item has scratches or damage that wasn’t described in the post,” says Reed. Search comparable and recently sold items to get a sense of what’s reasonable. However, when an item you’ve been searching for finally appears, it’s not the time to dicker—if the price is fair, take it (or up it a bit, if there’s competition). Even on fancier vintage-resale sites, it’s perfectly acceptable to politely propose a lower price or ask the seller what the best price is. “Negotiating will vary by item and by seller, but we often see sellers accepting offers of 10 to 20 percent off the listed price,” says
Brockway. Do your homework by consulting the Chairish Pink Book, a free digital resource that lists recent sale prices to help buyers and sellers gauge a realistic price range for vintage and newer pieces.
Set Aside Time to Scroll You won’t find the best gems by hunting for specific items. The real secondhand pros spend a block of time each day scrolling through the latest merchandise. “I check Craigslist at least once a day,” says Parsons, who takes about 10 minutes in the evening to search her area as well as surrounding towns to see what’s new. Sunday night can be a great time to peruse new listings, as people try to sell remaining items from their weekend garage sales. If you live in a bustling urban area, you could see thousands of new Craigslist posts a day. The gallery view lets you easily spot potential purchases—though counterintuitively, you might also want to click on a listing with bad photos or no photo. “I once found a beautiful antique buffet for $50 that had gone unclaimed simply because the seller didn’t bother posting a picture,” says Parsons. “I asked for one and snapped that piece right up.”
Score Not-Yet-Listed Items When you encounter a cool item with an attached cool seller, ask if they have more to sell. “Often people list pieces because they’re moving, organizing, or buying new furniture,” says Parsons. “I once bought a French chair from a gentleman and asked if he had anything else. Turns out, he was selling furniture from his mother’s house, but most of it was still in storage. I went there and was able to purchase two more chairs and a settee at a bargain price.” You could also ask for the seller’s contact info if it sounds like they will have more items to sell in the future. “Message them directly when you’re looking for another piece,” says Reed.
Know If Flaws Are Fixable Minor imperfections shouldn’t disqualify an item you love. Don’t walk away from a piece because of minor scratches or an ugly stain (easily refinished), outdated knobs (painless to swap out), or drawers with a musty smell (the odor will dissipate with some fresh air or a DIY fix). The real dealbreakers include mold, evidence of bugs, strong odors from pets or smoking, and drawers or doors that don’t move properly.
GET IT SOLD TAKE GO OD PHOTOS. Clear smart-
phone photos work great when taken during daylight against a clean backdrop, without shadows or clutter that could obscure the item’s condition. BE DETAILED IN THE DE SCRIP TION.
Use words that will help your listing surface in searches. Shoppers know they’re buying used and may be fine with blemishes or scratches, as long as you point them out. PRICE FAIRLY. Find out what similar items have recently sold for and price yours a bit higher in anticipation of haggling. “Start at 50 percent off the retail price, knowing that people will likely negotiate even more,” says Dennis. Also factor in the site’s fees, if there are any. FARM IT OUT. If you have a house full of items to unload, consider using Everything but the House, which will send a consultant to catalog items for sale and handle everything from pickup to listing to shipping, plus arrange donation or removal of anything that won’t bring value during online auction.
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R o a d Te s t
Air-Dry Products THE BEST ST YLERS OF SUMMER MA XIMIZE YO U R N AT U R A L T E X T U R E S O YO U C A N WA S H A N D G O A N D S T I L L L O O K G R E A T. O U T O F 2 5 T E ST E D, T H E S E G O T T H E J O B D O N E . By Lisa D eSantis
BEST CRE AM
Kenra Platinum Air Dry Crème 6 Don’t have time to blowdry but don’t want to arrive at work with wet hair? This styler boosts texture and speeds up airdry time by 60 percent. TO BUY: $22; ulta.com. B E S T F OA M
Ouai Air Dry Foam If your hair is fine, you’ll love this lightweight foam. It’s laced with nourishing kale extract to give waves definition without crunch. TO BUY: $28; theouai.com.
Bumble and Bumble Surf Styling Leave In Work this gel-cream formula into towel-dried hair for loose waves. It has UV filters to protect strands from the sun. TO BUY: $29; sephora.com.
realsimple ROAD TE ST
BEST CURL CRE AM
B E S T D E TA N G L E R
Garnier Pure Clean Detangler + Air Dry Wet hair is stretchy and weak, and brushing it can lead to breakage. Paired with a wide-tooth comb, this mist, infused with vitamin E and aloe, gently smooths snarls without snagging. The formula also helps prevent frizz while your hair dries. Use post-shower and post-pool. TO BUY: $6; at drugstores.
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B E S T S A LT S P R AY
Playa Endless Summer Spray Mist it onto damp hair for effortless, beachy texture, or onto second-day dry hair for extra oomph. TO BUY: $24; playa beauty.com.
OGX Locking + Coconut Curls Air Dry Cream For curls, moisture is a must. Drench yours with coconut oil and shea butter for springiness and shine. Scrunch and you’re done! TO BUY: $9; ulta.com.
G A R N I E R D E TA N G L E R : P E T E R A R D I T O ; P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S
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New Ways to Smell Good F R O M FA C E P O W D E R A N D H A I R M I S T T O T E M P O R A RY T A T T O O S , YUMMY FR AGR ANCES ARE P OPPING UP IN U N E X P EC T E D P L AC E S. T I M E TO D E L I G H T YO U R S E N S E S. By Heather Muir Maffei
has never been so much fun. Companies are thinking outside the traditional perfume bottle and infusing scents into different products in unique forms, including oils, powders, and creams, for you to wear from head to toe. So don’t worry if you’ve never found your signature scent. These products all serve a purpose—soften skin, gloss up hair, freshen feet—and smell amazing while doing so.
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Photograph b y Te d + Chelsea Cavanaugh
P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y H E AT H E R G R E E N E F O R H E L L O A R T I S T S
P S S T: F R AG R A N C E
THE REALIST
F O R YO U R B O DY
F O R YO U R S K I N
The creator’s goal was to design a fragrance that could be seen. Drumroll, please! Meet Amkiri, a temporary tattoo ink (in charcoal and ivory) scented with ginger, spearmint, and cedarwood. Draw on your skin (stencils included) and enjoy the scent for 12 hours. TO BUY: $60; amkiri.com.
F O R YO U R P I T S
When you want to shower but can’t, grab the pursesize Secret Body Cleansing Wipes, which whisk away odor-causing sweat so you can freshen up fast. TO BUY: $5 for 15; target.com.
F O R YO U R L E G S
Do your legs look like they’ve spent the past few months hibernating in tights? Tom Ford Soleil Blanc Shimmering Body Oil adds a sexy golden sheen in seconds. Its amber-andsandalwood scent was inspired by whitesand beaches. TO BUY: $100; sephora.com.
Finish off your makeup with a light dusting of Tutti Frutti It’s Bananas Brightening Setting Powder. The yellow tones counteract dark undereye circles and neutralize redness. Plus, it’s like scratch-and-sniff makeup—it smells like banana pudding. TO BUY: $30; toofaced.com.
F O R YO U R H A N D S
The grapeseed oil, watermelon fruit extract, and shea butter in Nest Fragrances Ocean Mist & Coconut Water Hand Cream leave hands supple, not sticky. The scent of coconut, cedarwood, and tiare will pair nicely with whatever else you’ve got on. TO BUY: $18; ulta.com.
F O R YO U R W R I S T S
Solid perfumes are ideal for on-the-go. Jo Malone London The Delightful Pair Solid Perfume Duo (in Nectarine Blossom & Honey and Peony & Blush Suede) offers two solids you can wear alone or mix to customize. TO BUY: $76; jomalone.com.
M O R E F O R YO U R U N D E R A R M S
With chic packaging and a sophisticated scent (rose, mandarin, and violet essential oils), Corpus Natural Deodorant turns the act of applying into a pampering experience. TO BUY: $22; corpusnaturals.com.
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F O R YO U R H A I R
F O R A L L OV E R
F O R YO U R L I P S
The new breath mint: Fresh Sugar Mint Rush Freshening Lip Treatment turns flaky lips into butter and gives you that post-brush feeling. Swipe on and press lips together to release the cooling capsules. TO BUY: $24; fresh.com.
The Diptyque Raw Materials In Color collection celebrates the brand’s five best-selling scents in TSA-friendly bottles; this one, Do Son, comes in a turquoisetinted bottle to represent its aquatic fragrance. TO BUY: $65; diptyqueparis.com.
Detectable only when someone gets close for a hug, Maison Francis Kurkdjian Paris Baccarat Rouge 540 Scented Hair Mist contains warm jasmine, saffron, and amber. Focus the alcohol-free formula on ends and flyaways to add sheen. TO BUY: $85; neimanmarcus.com.
F O R YO U R N E C K
F O R YO U R F E E T
The next best thing to washing all your kicks, Arm & Hammer Shoe Refresher Spray has a 360-degree nozzle you can point directly into your shoes (especially those you work out in or wear in the summer) to nix the stench with baking soda. It also works wonders on sweaty hats. TO BUY: $6; walmart.com.
F O R YO U R C A R
Notes of coastal rain and eucalyptus in DS&Durga Big Sur After Rain Auto Fragrance add a just-right freshness to any stale space (car, closet, drawers). TO BUY: $10; dsanddurga.com.
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Of all the fragrances tested, Lake & Skye 11 11 got us the most compliments. The unisex scent mimics the smell of skin after a dip in the ocean. TO BUY: $48; lakeandskye.com.
F O R YO U R FA C E
Spritz St. Ives Yaaas Face Mist Grapefruit onto skin before makeup to prime, after makeup to set, or throughout the day to rejuvenate (ahhh). Hydrators keep skin dewy and glowing while the formula’s zesty grapefruit scent serves as the perfect 3 p.m. pick-me-up. Store in the fridge for extra refreshment. TO BUY: $6; target.com.
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THE REALIST
Drugstore Insider T H E B E ST B E AU T Y P RO D U C T S I N T H E A I S L E S, H A N D P I C K E D BY A P RO
Anastasia Soare
OPI Nail Lacquer in Samoan Sand “If you’re looking for long-lasting, chip-proof wear, OPI polish is the best. This sophisticated neutral is my go-to shade.” TO BUY: $10.50; walmart.com.
Fran Wilson Eye Tees “An upgrade of the classic beauty staple. Use them for precision shadow work or to perfectly smudge liner.” TO BUY: $5 for 80; amazon.com.
Aveeno UltraCalming Makeup Removing Wipes “These are great for taking off the day while on the go. They are always in my travel bag.” TO BUY: $9; cvs.com.
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Neutrogena Oil-Free Eye Makeup Remover “No matter how heavily you layered on your mascara or colored in your brows, this gentle makeup remover melts away product from the sensitive eye area, without the stinging and irritation typical of cleansers.” TO BUY: $6; target.com.
Ardell Individual Lashes “Individual lashes are best for customizing your look. Place a few at the corners for an easy feel, or add more to amp up the drama.” TO BUY: $5 for 56 lashes; cvs.com.
H E A D S H O T C O U R T E S Y O F A N A S TA S I A S O A R E ; S M E A R : B R I A N H E N N ; P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S
L’Oréal Paris Voluminous Mascara “This high-performing formula is comparable to high-end mascaras that retail at triple the price.” TO BUY: $8; cvs.com.
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THE REALIST
Now What?!? S M A RT F I X E S F O R L I F E ’ S L I T T L E D I S A ST E R S B y Ta m a r a K r a u s
My knives are rusty.
There’s a scratch on my leather purse.
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While you can’t remove a scratch, you can camouflage it. If the scratch is minor, dip a soft cloth into a tablespoon of olive oil and rub it over the scratch in a circular motion, says Tony Pecorella, president of Modern Leather Goods in New York City. The oil will condition and buff the area (but use oil only on heavier leathers). For larger and deeper scuffs, apply a leather dye that matches your purse color (try Angelus Acrylic Leather Paint, $5.70; amazon.com) with a cloth until the scuffs start to fade. Test the dye on an inconspicuous spot first, since all leathers react differently. Afterward, use a clean cloth to coat the bag with a neutral leather-care polish (like Leather Conditioner, $13; applebrandcare .com) to seal the dye and even out the color. Leave dyed or delicate leathers to the pros. THE FIX:
My beach towels smell like chlorine even after I wash them. If you need to use the towels immediately, you can spritz them with vodka, which is a natural deodorizer, says Maeve Richmond, founder of Maeve’s Method, an organizing company in New York City. If you have time to wash them, add a half cup of 20 Mule Team Borax Detergent Booster ($4.60; target .com) to the machine with your regular detergent, and then dry them as usual. Like baking soda, borax helps break down settled-in odors. THE FIX:
G E T T Y I M AG ES
Wipe down the rusty blade with a cloth dipped in vinegar, and then grab a potato (any kind will do) and push the blade into the center of it, says Mary Findley, coauthor of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Green Cleaning. Potatoes contain oxalic acid, which may remove rust. If the blade goes through the other end, use two potatoes. Let the knife sit for about 20 minutes, pull it out, and wipe it down with rubbing alcohol to tackle any remaining grime. If it’s still rusty, repeat as needed or let it sit in the potato longer. Toss the potato when you’re done. To help prevent rust, completely dry knives after washing them, and avoid putting them in the dishwasher, says Eunice Byun, cofounder of Material, a kitchenware brand. Store them on a magnetic strip mounted on a wall instead of in a knife block to stave off mold buildup. THE FIX:
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THE REALIST
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Summer Style Under $50 LO OK LIKE A MILLION BUCKS ( W I T H O U T A C T U A L LY S P E N D I N G I T )
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WITH THESE FRESH STE AL S. By Flavia Nunez
1 A.n.a Drop Sleeve Blouse, 7
6
$44; jcpenney.com. 2 Leopard Print Satin Scarf,
$39; stories.com.
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3 Top with Smocking,
$35; hm.com. 4 The Circle Bag, $15;
juneandjanuary.com.
6 Orange Open Back Dress,
$40; zara.com. 7 Wood and Yellow Resin Bangle, $30; inkalloy.com. 8 Sun Jellies Retro Bag,
$27.50; bando.com. 9 Hurricane Drift Sandal,
$40; teva.com. 9
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1 0 Crinkled Top with Lace,
$18; hm.com.
P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S
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5 Sunshine Heritage Canvas Carmel Sneaker, $49.95; toms.com.
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1 Begonia By Mine Cream 2
Floral Print Belted Midi Skirt, $49; lulus.com. 2 Anna & Ava Raffia Statement Hoop Earrings, $30; dillards.com. 3 Buttoned Blazer,
$49.90; zara.com.
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4 Bonita Sandal, $45; circusbysamedelman.com.
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5 LLD Solid O-Ring Bandeau Bikini Top, $10, and High-Waisted Bottom, $12; aeropostale.com. 6 Medium Natural Rose
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Gold Open Top Canvas Tote Bag, $36; landsend.com. 7 Side Tie A-Line Dress,
$43; ellos.us. 8 Tretorn Sky Slide, $50;
shopbop.com. 9 Paper Bag Waist Pants,
$15; at Burlington. 1 0 Can We Be Besties
Bracelet, $38; eleganceinc.com.
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THE REALIST
Summer Style Under $50
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3 1
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1 All In Favor Patterned
Drape Front Blouse, $49; nordstrom.com.
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2 Pure Jill Jacquard
Tie-Dye Print Triangle Scarf, $49; jjill.com. 9
3 Pure Linen Casual
Shorts, $44; markandspencer.com/us.
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4 Laniyah Fringe Drop
Earrings, $44; baublebar.com. 5 Bucket Shoulder Bag,
$49.95; eloquii.com. 8
6 Embroidered Blouse,
$49.95; ae.com. 10
7 Indigo Rd. Brieg Sandal,
$49; 6pm.com. 8 Embroidered Cotton
Top, $20; hm.com. 9 Striped Skirt, $15;
at Burlington. 1 0 Originals, $48;
sunski.com.
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1 White Beaded Hoop 6
Earrings, $29.50; talbots.com. 2 Claude Slide, $45;
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reportshoes.com. 3 Cotton Jersey Sleeveless Tunic Dress, $30; landsend.com. 4 Anna & Ava Panama Sun
Hat, $28; dillards.com. 5 A New Day Rayna Knotted Slide Sandal, $23; target.com. 6 Plaid Plunging
One-Piece Swimsuit, $30; cupshe.com. 7 Colorblock Gym
Racerback, $25; victoriasecret.com/pink. 7
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THE REALIST
The Essential T H AT B A S I C I N YO U R C L O S E T I S M O R E V E R S AT I L E T H A N YO U T H I N K . T H I S M O N T H : H O W TO ST Y L E B E R M U DA S H O RT S F O R A N Y O C C A S I O N By Flavia Nunez S TA RT W I T H T H E S H O RT S . . .
. . . A D D A TA N K A N D U T I L I TA R I A N JA C K E T
Bring texture to simple navy shorts with a crochet top, espadrilles, and a straw hat for a low-key daytime outfit. TO BUY: Crochet Sweater Tank, $69.50; luckybrand.com. Piper Jacket, $250; aetherapparel.com. Leopard Links Earrings, $42; honeyrosek.com. Sun Hat with Sash Detail, $15; tjmaxx.com. Indigo Rd. Canvas Slide, $58; francescas.com.
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...ADD A BL A ZER
. . . A D D A C LU T C H A N D A P R E T T Y T O P
Shorts can be office appropriate when combined with a crisp white shirt and a tailored blazer. Try bright, walkable heeled sandals for a colorful twist. TO BUY: Washington Shirt, $80; kestan.co. Hutton Blazer, $169; anntaylor.com. Miyake Hoop Earrings, $38; frances valentine.com. Bethany Woven Drawstring Bucket, $300; colehaan.com. Seychelles Footwear Antique Sandals, $119; lulus.com.
A flowy blouse with interesting details, like ruffles and a side bow, dresses up the summertime staple for a night out. Complete the feminine look with a layered necklace and a shiny clutch. TO BUY: Wrap-Front Linen-Blend Top, $35; oldnavy.com. Southern Living Hammered Multi Strand Necklace, $48; dillards.com. Jen Clutch, $235; kayudesign.com. BC Footwear Fences Vegan Wedge Sandals, $85; nordstrom.com.
P h o t o g r a p h s b y Ke v i n S w e e n e y
S O F T ST Y L I N G BY M A I T R A N
TO BUY: 10" Bermuda Stretch Chino Short, $49.50; jcrew.com.
© 2019 Landmark Vineyards, Kenwood, CA. All Rights Reserved. LANDMARK, the Stylized L, OVERLOOK, and the accompanying logos are trademarks of Landmark Vineyards or its affiliates. LV190409-07
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MEANINGFUL CONNECTIONS IN A MODERN WORLD
5 Times We Felt Proud to Be Americans T H E S E PA T R I O T I C M O M E N T S . By Erin E. Evans
R Z C R E AT I V E / S T O C K S Y
H A N G T H E B U N T I N G A N D G E T I N S P I R E D BY
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Believing in the process In 2016, there was an election for state senate in North Carolina. My brother-in-law, Jay Chaudhuri, the son of Indian immigrants, threw his hat into the ring. Many voters couldn’t even pronounce his last name. But he went out in blizzards and heat waves and knocked on 10,000 doors, and his neighbors on his block in Raleigh, none of them Indian, handed out flyers and put up yard signs all over the district. Jay won by a landslide—and I was there to witness it: the promise of America, where any immigrant from anywhere can find home, and his child can even grow up to be president.
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Finding beauty in the parks To celebrate the 100th anniversary of the National Park Service, in 2016, I set out to see each of our national parks (there were 59 at the time). Over the course of one scenery-soaked year, I traveled across sand and soil, from the lowest point in the United States (Death Valley) to the base of our highest peak (Denali). Our nation’s natural beauty is as diverse as the people who live in it, and the parks are where red and blue can come together, sometimes in the same vista. Setting aside our most majestic places for the enjoyment of all was a prescient American idea, and my trip through the parks left me with a deep sense of American pride. CONOR KNIGHTON IS A CORRESPONDENT FOR CBS SUNDAY MORNING.
SUKETU MEHTA IS THE AUTHOR OF MAXIMUM CITY AND THIS LAND IS OUR LAND: AN IMMIGRANT’S MANIFESTO. HE LIVES IN NEW YORK CITY.
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Remembering an icon My great-grandmother, Ida B. Wells, was born enslaved and went on to impact the world through journalism, activism, and the women’s suffrage movement. I have spent over a decade working on projects to help celebrate and remember her. This year, the city of Chicago renamed a major downtown street Ida B. Wells Drive. When I saw the street signs unveiled, I was filled with pride, and I thought about her courage and determination to fight for equality and justice. The recognition of black women as leaders is a testament to the progress our country has made over the last 150 years. MICHELLE DUSTER IS AN AUTHOR AND EDUCATOR IN CHICAGO. SHE IS WORKING ON A BIOGRAPHY OF HER GREAT-GRANDMOTHER.
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Removing the helmet One of my proudest moments was when I was in Iraq between 2003 and 2004 while serving in the army. Guard duty in the towers put us on display more than usual, so Iraqis often came to interact with us. A woman brought a little girl to the tower, and she gestured to me to take off my helmet so the girl could see I was a woman. When I took it off and pulled my hair down, this little girl’s eyes got so wide, and she had a huge smile on her face. During Saddam Hussein’s reign, women were pushed out of the workforce, and a lot of their rights were restricted. For a moment, I felt like a role model, showing this girl that women could do anything. I also felt an intense pride in that uniform and lucky to be from a country that gives me the opportunity to serve.
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Connecting over breakfast I’m part of an international breakfast club: a group of six friends who get together one weekend morning per month to enjoy the breakfast traditions we grew up with. We’ve shared elaborate meals filled with dishes recalling our childhoods and families in Taiwan, South China, North India, Mexico, rural Washington State, and Washington, D.C. When I look around the table and think about all the different languages we speak (seven!), the holidays we celebrate (so many!), and the varied spices that make their way onto our breakfast tables, I feel so proud to be American. LETICIA LANDA IS COAUTHOR, WITH CALEB ZIGAS, OF WE ARE LA COCINA: RECIPES IN PURSUIT OF THE AMERICAN DREAM. SHE LIVES IN SAN FRANCISCO.
RYAN LEIGH DOSTIE IS THE AUTHOR OF FORMATION: A WOMAN’S MEMOIR OF STEPPING OUT OF LINE. SHE LIVES IN NEW HAVEN, CONNECTICUT.
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R E L AT I N G
Good Read
An Old-Fashioned Kitchen C O N V E N T I O N A L A D V I C E S AY S T H E B I G G E R T H E K I T C H E N , T H E H A P P I E R T H E C O O K . N O T F O R RU T H R E I C H L, W H O W I L L TA K E H E R S M A L L , E F F I C I E N T P R E P S PA C E , T H A N K Y O U V E RY M U C H .
I’m standing in the gorgeous kitchen of the Airbnb I’ve rented for a few weeks in Los Angeles. It has every bell and whistle: dark marble counters, computer-equipped stove, European dishwasher, a cool sculptural vent. There’s a huge refrigerator that is so tastefully camouflaged by smooth wooden panels you’d never know it was there. Every nook and cranny of this kitchen has been designed so that even the usually inaccessible corner spaces have pivoting shelves to hold the many machines—food processors, spice grinders, mixers—hidden beneath the counter. On top of that, it has a view of an immaculate garden much loved by a neighboring cat who resembles a tiny tiger. There is not one thing wrong with this kitchen…except for the fact that I hate it. Despite its glamorous efficiency, this kitchen and I have yet to produce a delicious meal. I’m not surprised: All the money that’s been poured into this room has made it cold, clinical, unwelcoming. “Go away!” it seems to shout when I walk in. It is proof that the Great American Kitchen is utter nonsense. You know, that myth that it’s impossible to produce a decent meal unless you have a battery of arcane appliances. New and supposedly necessary gadgets are constantly entering our lives. Last year it was the Instant Pot.
S H E A E VA N S /O F F S E T
AT T H E M O M E N T,
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R E L AT I N G
This year it’s the air fryer. Next year it might be the Anti-Griddle (such an object really exists; it is to cold what ordinary griddles are to heat). The people who produce these things want you to covet computerized refrigerators that warn you when you’re about to run out of milk, intelligent ovens that tell you when the roast is done, and countertop cookers eager to produce an entire meal at the press of a button. I’ve been breathlessly introduced to each of these items. But I don’t want them. The truth is, given a few excellent ingredients, a reliable source of heat, a sharp knife, and a couple of pots, anyone can produce a great meal. What she (or he) can’t do is cook that meal in a kitchen that makes her (or him) miserable. truly call my own occupied the corner of a bare-bones loft on New York City’s thenungentrified and fairly scary Lower East Side. We built our counters by scavenging wooden pallets that had been discarded by our industrial neighbors. (Back then, downtown THE FIRST KITCHEN I COULD
New York was still filled with factories.) Our stove was a cranky old creature someone had left on the street. There was, of course, no dishwasher, which has given me a lifelong appreciation for washing dishes. (I find creating order out of chaos extremely fulfilling.) We had no money, so when I needed a rolling pin, it made more sense to buy a bottle of cheap wine and use that to roll out my pastry. (The wine was terrible, but it went into a terrific stew.) And I’m convinced I invented the Microplane: When I needed to grate Parmesan, I riffled through my husband’s tool box and borrowed his rasp. That kitchen may have been shabby and small, but it was always filled with music, and I danced joyfully around as I taught myself to make good meals out of cheap cuts, bake bread (in discarded ceramic flower pots), and feed the hungry friends who showed up whenever mealtime rolled around. The kitchen made me very happy, and I ended up writing a cookbook. (If you can find a copy of Mmmmm: A Feastiary, you will discover that it contains not a single recipe requiring a food processor or stand mixer.)
That kitchen may have been shabby and small, but it was always filled with music, and I danced joyfully around as I taught myself to make good meals. I moved on to a communal house in Berkeley, California, where we rarely sat down to dinner with fewer than a dozen people. We still had no dishwasher or fancy food machine, but people stood around that kitchen talking, chopping, drinking wine, rolling out pasta on an old-fashioned chitarra, and stretching one chicken to feed a crowd. I don’t think I’ve ever served better meals than during the 10 years I lived in that house. My next kitchen was in Los Angeles, in an old house with a scarred linoleum floor and a single electrical outlet. Once again, no dishwasher. But it was an airy space with a view of distant snowcapped hills, and bougainvillea came in through the window. Despite the antique stove and scarce electricity, I cooked Thanksgiving dinner for 30 people every year, and no one ever complained about the food. feeding your family was backbreaking work. You had to raise the animals, tend the garden, butcher the meat. You had to fetch the water and light the fire. You had to preserve summer’s bounty to see your family through the winter. Modern life has changed all that. Indoor plumbing, refrigeration, and supermarkets (not to mention online shopping) have turned cooking into something that is no longer a chore. Today cooking can be—should be—pure pleasure. So here’s my advice: Forget about all the appliances you think you need. Just turn your kitchen into a space you love; everything else will follow.
E VA N S U N G
F O R M O S T O F H U M A N H I S T O RY,
Get the most from a compact cook space with the storage tips and tricks at realsimple.com/smallkitchen.
I can’t tell you what your dream kitchen should be. We all cook so differently that one kitchen couldn’t possibly please everyone. But I can tell you what makes me happy. I prefer small kitchens. Standing in the middle of mine, near Hudson, New York, I can stretch out my arms and touch the sink on one side and the stove on the other. About that stove: I invested in a very fancy one, and I’m sorry I did. My previous stove was the cheapest six-burner model on the market, and I loved it. It shot up to temperature in minutes, while the behemoth I now possess takes almost half an hour to reach 450 degrees. I like to bake pies (yes, I now own a rolling pin), so I covered my counters with a green stone called serpentine, which allows me to roll out dough anywhere I want. This material is not only beautiful but extremely sturdy, and I can plop the hottest pots on top without giving it a thought. I do have a dishwasher, but the truth is I wish I didn’t. It takes up too much room, and if I could do it over I’d put the garbage can where the dishwasher lives. It would be a major improvement; you’re always tossing things while you cook, and the dishes can wait until later. I’m lucky: At five feet six inches, I’m average height for an American woman, and most standard kitchens are designed for me. But if you’re not, fix it. Chopping at the wrong height is exhausting. If you’re short, put in layers of rubber mats; if you’re tall, add chopping blocks so you don’t have to bend over each time you pick up a knife. This is a small thing. It is also everything. Some people like their kitchens spare. I don’t. I prefer color and chaos, my counters covered with bowls of fruit and jars of spices. I have a few antique appliances too. My favorite is an ABOUT old juicer that reminds me of a friendly eleT H E AU T H O R phant. It cost $2 in a junk shop, but it makes Ruth Reichl was the me laugh every time I walk into the room. food editor of the There is no place I would rather be. My kitchen Los Angeles Times, restaurant critic of has light and air and music. Though it’s small, the New York Times, there’s plenty of room for any friend who wants and editor in chief to lend a hand. That happens fairly often, because of Gourmet. Her recent memoir is this room is an invitation to cook. The cats like Save Me the Plums. it too. They come in purring loudly and twine She lives in upstate around our ankles. But even when the room is New York with empty, I am never lonely. When I stand at the her husband. stove, the ghosts of all the women who taught me to cook are there, cheering me on. Most of all, each time I caramelize an onion in butter or fill the kitchen with the fine yeasty scent of bread rising in the oven, I’m reminded of all the little things that make life worth living. Because that’s the real secret of a great kitchen: One you love is genuinely life-changing. It not only makes you a better cook; it makes you a happier person.
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R E L AT I N G
Modern Manners R E A L S I M P L E ’ S E T I Q U E T T E E X P E R T, C AT H E R I N E N E W M A N , O F F E R S HER BEST ADVICE ON YO U R S O C I A L Q UA N DA R I E S.
M.K. ASKS…
We visit my husband’s parents often. My mother-in-law always cooks us dinner and spends quite some time in the kitchen preparing. After dinner, I offer to do the dishes and will start clearing plates, but she declines my help and tells me to relax. I never know if I should insist or just leave her to clean. I feel awkward because when she visits us at our place, she insists on cleaning up even though I decline her help. Should I insist on helping?
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My maid of honor didn’t give me a wedding gift. I assume it just slipped her mind, but she’s not in a bad financial situation, and the whole thing makes me uneasy. Is there a polite way to bring this up to her? I don’t like feeling this tension with one of my best friends.
ABOUT C AT H E R I N E The author of One Mixed-Up Night, Catastrophic Happiness, and Waiting for Birdy, Catherine Newman has shared her wisdom on matters ranging from family and friends to happiness and pickling in numerous publications. She gets advice from her husband and two opinionated children in Amherst, Massachusetts.
So don’t. Honestly, you don’t have to be upset about something just because you recognize it as potentially upsetting. One thing we say to each other in my family is, “Try not to hurt your own feelings.” Cue the Frozen soundtrack and let it go. Your beloved friend was your maid of honor! She probably bought a dress, maybe threw you a shower or a party, stood by you, toasted you, and supported you in all the millions of ways the role requires. Lucky you. If you were to say something, your bestie may buy you a present, but she’d also feel terrible. I can’t imagine that outcome would really be desirable. Cultivating your own gratitude—for friends and family, a new spouse, the gifts you did get—will be much more rewarding.
I l l u s t r a t i o n s b y Yo c o N a g a m i y a
C AT H E R I N E N E W M A N I L L U S T R AT I O N B Y U L I K N Ö R Z E R
If she’s insisted at your house, then you can take that as a sign that your mother-in-law thinks insistence is appropriate—and you can invoke it as such: “Ah, but you always insist at my house!” Make a rule, if you like: “When you cook, I clean, and vice versa.” Or don’t. My husband, who does the dishes in a very particular way, genuinely does not like other people to take over, since he’ll have to reload the dishwasher “correctly” as soon as they leave. And my daughter, a self-identified introvert, wondered if your mother-in-law might actually crave the bit of time to herself that cleaning up affords. Me? I can’t help wondering why this is a conversation between only the women in the family. Maybe for a change, you could try saying, “Let’s let the guys handle it.” And leave the washing to the others.
L.S. ASKS…
T. H . A S K S …
I’ve been in my stepdaughter’s life for three years, and we are slowly developing a great relationship, but I’m struggling with how to bring up her table etiquette. She’s 25 years old and college educated with a fantastic career, but she holds her knife and fork as if she were shoveling food. She eats directly off shared plates. She chews with her mouth open. I worry about how she handles herself in business situations, and I think these bad habits may affect her ability to climb the corporate ladder. Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated. How lovely that you enjoy a great relationship with your stepdaughter. Focus on that, and cross her table manners off your to-do list. Given that she appears to be thriving at work, I’m guessing your purported concern for her career is masking your own irritation with her habits. If you’re genuinely worried, remind yourself that she might simply relax and let it all hang out at home. (I say this as a person who eats salad with her fingers at her own table but would never grab a handful of arugula from a coworker’s plate.) Be glad she’s comfortable around you. And remember that, at this stage in her life, the time for unsolicited advice might be never.
C . D. A S K S …
I’m hosting a birthday party for my son and daughter outside our home, and my kids are excited to invite several of their friends from school. Cost prohibits us from inviting more than 30 children to the event. My husband feels very strongly about inviting his five siblings and their children—17 cousins—to the party. While they all live close by us, a falling-out a few years ago estranged us from the larger family, with whom we have since reconnected. I love my nieces and nephews, and my husband is trying to stay connected to his siblings and their families. But it seems unfair to limit my children’s true friends so their cousins—who are more like acquaintances—and parents can feel included in our family celebration. Is blood really thicker than water here? Hooray for an end to family feuding! But I feel for your kids, whose birthday is getting co-opted by your husband as an occasion to mend these relations. Your children deserve to be celebrated on their own terms. So consider splitting the event into two: a big, potlucky bash at home for family, complete with cake and games, and the venue party, to which your kids can invite their actual friends. In the long term, you want your children to develop happy relationships with this lucky glut of cousins rather than feeling (potentially resentfully) that they paid the cost of these repairs.
H AV E A N E T I Q U E T T E Q U E S T I O N ? Submit your social conundrums to modernmanners@realsimple.com. Selected letters will be featured on these pages every month.
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R E L AT I N G
The Tools
PUP TENT
This lightweight shelter provides elevation, shade, and ventilation. Use it in your backyard, while camping, or at the beach. TO BUY: Pawhut Elevated Cooling Cot with Canopy Shade, $39; wayfair.com.
Pet Tricks A S T E M P S R I S E , S O D O H E A LT H H A Z A R D S F O R P E T S . H E L P T H E M B E AT T H E H E AT W I T H T H E S E S M A RT TAC T I C S. By Juno DeMelo
Play It Safe
Keep Cool
On extra-hot days, go on walks in the early morning or evening to help prevent overheating and lower the risk of sunburn, especially in dogs with sensitive skin, light hair, or short haircuts. Apply a pet-specific sunscreen to the tips of your pup’s ears and nose, even if she has long fur. Panting and drooling that seem excessive or out of character for your dog can be early signs of overheating— and mean it’s time to contact your vet. Before walking on asphalt, test the surface with your thumb: If you can’t hold it comfortably for a few seconds, stick to soil or grass. Booties can also help protect your pup’s paws.
The temperature inside your parked car can rise nearly 20 degrees in just 10 minutes, and cracking the windows doesn’t have as much of a cooling effect as you’d think. The longer your car sits, the hotter it gets. In fact, even on a 70-degree day, the inside of your car can reach 104 degrees Fahrenheit after half an hour. If you know you can’t bring your pet inside when you get to where you’re going, leave him at home.
If it’s too hot for you without the air-conditioning on, it’s likely too hot for your pet, especially if you have a shortnosed animal, such as a pug, Boston terrier, or Persian or Himalayan cat. Close the shades when you leave home, and consider keeping the AC on. Outdoors, make sure your pet has access to fresh water and a ventilated shady spot, like a tree canopy or covered deck (but not a dog house, which can trap heat). You can also wet his paws and stomach with a hose or fill a kiddie pool for him to cool off in on his own. (Supervise pets in pools, and don’t use water that’s too cold.)
O U R E X P E RT S HEIDI COOLEY, DVM, BANFIELD PET HOSPITAL, VANCOUVER, WASHINGTON JOHN DE JONG, DVM, PRESIDENT OF THE AMERICAN VETERINARY MEDICAL ASSOCIATION KURT R. VENATOR, DVM, PHD, CHIEF VETERINARY OFFICER AT PURINA
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H 2O O N T H E G O
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CO OLING VEST
After you soak it and wring it out, this vest employs evaporative cooling technology to help keep your dog comfortable when he’s outside in the heat. TO BUY: Ruffwear Swamp Cooler, $60; ruffwear.com.
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How to Bury a Grudge A FA M I LY F E U D . A C O L D W A R W I T H A N E I G H B O R . A WORKPL ACE INJUSTICE. IT MIGHT FEEL R I G H T TO H O L D O N TO YO U R S E N S E O F B E I N G W R O N G E D — B U T Y O U M AY E N D U P W I T H M O R E T H A N YO U R S H A R E O F T H E SU FF E R I N G. H E R E ’ S H O W T O M OV E F O RWA R D. By Melanie Mannarino
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for a minute: Are you holding any grudges? Maybe your blood still boils whenever you remember getting laid off five years ago. Or perhaps you’re still seething about that comment your sister made last month. Or you still can’t move past how Grandma (RIP) favored your cousin when you were kids. (Full disclosure: That last example is all mine. It took me decades to get over my grandmother comparing my “beautiful” cousin to child actress Brooke Shields. I got compared to exactly nobody.) S E A R C H YO U R H E A R T
Illustrations by Gracia Lam
R E L AT I N G
It’s perfectly natural to bear grudges of all sizes—against a relative who showed favoritism, against a partner who cheated on you, and worse. And it’s hard for most of us to let them go, says sociologist Christine Carter, PhD, author of The Sweet Spot: How to Accomplish More by Doing Less. “For many people, it’s easy to hang on to resentment,” she says. When we’ve been wronged, it feels validating to think of ourselves as a blameless, oppressed victim. But playing that role makes it hard to move on, because it makes you powerless—you can’t have it both ways, says Carter. It took Mina, a 39-year-old payroll executive and mother of two, years to realize she couldn’t fully move forward with her life as long as she was holding a grudge against her controlling father. “My father had anger issues and old-world views about a woman’s role. When I was a teenager, we had a huge fight, and he threatened me with physical violence,” she says. She cut off contact with him for more than five years. “I wished all kinds of evil on him. But after a while, I had accomplished so much on my own and was starting to think, ‘I can’t go on to new adventures and positive experiences if I still have this anger.’ ” Harboring resentment toward someone who has insulted, demeaned, cheated on, or otherwise hurt you doesn’t empower you. It can actively cause you harm, both physically and emotionally. Repeatedly recalling the slight (yes, it can definitely feel much larger than “slight”) is called ruminat-
ing, says Everett Worthington, PhD, professor emeritus of psychology at Virginia Commonwealth University, who has spent his career studying forgiveness. “Research shows that when people keep ruminating, it increases the base level of the stress hormone cortisol in their bloodstream,” he says. “That in turn can shrink the brain and also impact the immune system, cardiovascular system, GI system, sex drive—there are a lot of costs.” Research bears out the health benefits of forgiveness. In a study on young adults, higher levels of forgiveness were connected with fewer physical issues, like sleep problems, digestive trouble, and headaches, as well as fewer feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, anxiety, and depression. If your lingering anger toward the neighbors who wronged you ends up compromising your health, “the effects of the injustice are worse than the injustice itself,” says Robert Enright, PhD, professor of educational
psychology at the University of Wisconsin–Madison. It’s like you’ve been hurt twice, and that’s not really what you want, right? What you want (presumably) is to move on and feel good about yourself and the world, while making sure the offense doesn’t happen again. The only way to get there is through forgiveness. “Resentment is a slow, happinessstealing poison,” says Enright. “And forgiveness is like medicine.” By Enright’s definition, forgiveness is being good to those who are not good to you. Difficult, yes, but the payoff is worth it. “Think of yourself as someone who has the power to create the life you want to create,” says Carter. “Showing mercy to the people who wrong us is a little-known secret to happiness.” Mina found happiness in her 20s, while visiting friends over Easter break. “I woke up in Italy, and the bells were ringing at the nearby church, and the sky was filled with light pink and purple,” she recalls. “I was happy in that moment, appreciative of my friends and thankful I was living the exact way I wanted to live. I silently said to my father, ‘I forgive you. I love you! I thank you
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for my life. I wish you well and hope you are all right.’ That was it. I released my anger and hatred for him that morning.” Ready to release your own hurt? Set aside everything you think you know about holding grudges and follow these expert guidelines for letting them go and lightening your emotional load. C O N S I D E R W H AT ’ S G O O D F O R YO U.
“In holding a grudge, there’s a sense of strength and righteousness in the short term,” notes Enright. “You’re saying, ‘You can’t do this to me.’ The quest for justice seems right. But it does not cure the resentment.” It’s not about whether the offender deserves forgiveness. “You deserve it,” says Enright, “because you are the one who is hurt. You deserve to live a life free of that gnawing and discontent.” S E E T H E O T H E R P E R S O N T H RO U G H
It may feel like the offender’s actions were meant to hurt you—and sometimes that’s true. But Enright encourages everyone to view these incidents from a different perspective. “Don’t define the person by NEW EYES.
the words or action that hurt you,” he says. “That is not all the person is. Try to see them more broadly, in terms of their humanity and when they might have done good. You’ll see the weaknesses they have never overcome—that is a tragedy for them, making them and others miserable. When people are consistently mean to us, especially in families, there is likely something deeper going on. The offer of forgiveness is healing for both of you. You don’t have to excuse them, but say, ‘Here’s a person who could be living a fuller life but isn’t.’ ” It’s OK to recall the hurt, adds Worthington. But when doing so, replace the negative emotions with more positive ones of empathy or sympathy for the offender. D O N ’ T WA I T F O R S O M E O N E T O “ E A R N ” YO U R F O RG I V E N E S S .
It’s an altruistic gift, says Worthington. “People don’t deserve forgiveness. They don’t earn it. We simply give it.” Carter’s advice: Do it sooner rather than later. “A lot of people hold grudges because they are waiting for an apology,” she says. “They think, ‘I’ll forgive her, but she hasn’t asked me yet.’ But that’s not the way the world works. Most people won’t apologize in a way
“Think of yourself as someone who has the power to create the life you want to create. Showing mercy to the people who wrong us is a little-known secret to happiness.”
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that is satisfying—in our culture we aren’t really taught how to do it. So if we want to be happy and heal ourselves when we’ve been hurt, we must forgive whether or not we are asked for forgiveness.” Anna, a 35-year-old writer and mom of one, spent years nursing a grudge against a teacher who cut her from show choir in seventh grade— even after they both moved on to the high school. “For the first two years of high school, I would not speak to her or look her in the eye,” she admits. “But the first day of junior year, I was like, ‘This is silly. I don’t care.’ So that day, I smiled at her. After that, I really enjoyed her class—and we are still in touch, nearly 20 years later. I’m glad for both of us that I gave her a second chance. Smiling at her was way less emotionally taxing than holding all that negative energy.” S E PA R AT E F O RG I V E N E S S F RO M
By forgiving someone, you are not validating their behavior, the experts agree. This is especially important to remember in more serious situations, including cases of abuse, legal strife, or marital infidelity. Reconciliation is mutual; forgiveness is not. Even if you’ve suffered a huge injustice, says Enright, “you can offer the gift of goodness to the other person, knowing they made a mistake— whether or not they understand what they’ve done, are sorry for it, or try to make reparations.” When people do not forgive, says Enright, they tend to pass their resentR E C O N C I L I AT I O N .
R E L AT I N G
you can use to improve your life and guide you and provide inspiration,” she explains. “When you form a grudge against someone for bad behavior, it inspires you to behave in the opposite way.” In time, you may even become grateful for the opportunity to avoid similar bad behavior and for the example of how not to treat others. O N LY C O N F RO N T T H E O F F E N D E R I F YO U T H I N K I T W I L L C H A N G E T H I N G S .
ment on to others. “In a family, the children inherit the anger,” he says. “The innocent ones inherit the resentment that shouldn’t be theirs. They grow up with an anger, and if they enter into a marital union, they bring that anger into the new relationship.” F O RG I V E F R E E LY, B U T D O N ’ T N E C E S -
Instead, reframe the relationship. Say you haven’t spoken with your sister in 15 years, and lately you’ve been thinking of burying your grudge. Go ahead—but know that you have a right to redefine the relationship. You can forgive her parenting criticism and still choose not to vacation with her anymore. “A lot of times, we hold on to grudges to give ourselves permission to not bridge a divide,” says Carter. “But you don’t need the grudge to create safety for yourself. Forgive her, S A R I LY F O RG E T.
but keep the boundary: If you know your sister is always going to hurt you, I wouldn’t recommend spending Christmas at her house. Don’t expose yourself to future harm.” After forgiving her father, Mina didn’t renew their relationship. “I know that in the end, I made the right decision for me and for him,” she says. “I thought we might say one last goodbye before he died. But it’s OK—I’ve let him go and all the baggage that came with him.” FIND THE LESSON IN THE OFFENSE.
“If you think someone will deny their actions and criticize you for being overly sensitive, it’s better to show you forgive than to proclaim it,” says Enright. “Return a phone call or text, smile in the office hallway, pay them a visit—be good to them in a genuine sense. They will understand.” If reconciliation does seem possible, he says, you can sit down with the person and tell them, “You hurt me, and I’d like for us to avoid having that happen again.” K N O W T H AT I T ’ S N E V E R T O O L AT E .
“You can even forgive someone who is deceased,” notes Enright. “You can take an inventory of the injustices of your life, from your firstgrade teacher up to your boss yesterday, and practice forgiving everybody so they don’t ‘win’ twice. If you hold on to it, they win again. Forgive them, and it takes away their power.” R E A L LY.
In her new book, How to Hold a Grudge, author Sophie Hannah explores the positive side of grudges— namely, the things they can teach you about how you want to live your life and interact with others. What stays with you, says Hannah, is the story you choose to remember about an incident that made you feel wronged or hurt. “The grudge becomes a story
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W O R K , M O N E Y, A N D H E A L T H ADVICE FOR BUSY PEOPLE
3 Money Moves to Retire Early YO U D O N ’ T H AV E T O W I N T H E P O W E R B A L L — A F E W F I N A N C I A L T W E A K S N O W C O U L D S H AV E Y E A R S O FF YO U R R E T I R E M E N T CO U N T D OW N.
R AY M O N D F O R B E S L L C / S T O C K S Y
By Kate Rockwood
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your typical retiree. Sure, she fills her days with hobbies (hiking, skiing, traveling, volunteering) and never punches an office clock, but— already a year and a half into her post-work life—the former political communications consultant is only 39. Her husband, Mark Bunge, who also retired in December 2017, is 42. Over a sixyear period of aggressive saving and budget trimming, the couple socked away enough to last them the next five-plus decades. Tanja’s story may sound extreme, but the truth is a lot of people can reduce their working years, with a little financial foresight and planning. “Many middleclass-and-up folks could retire earlier than they think, even without having big advantages,” says Hester, who now lives in Lake Tahoe, California, and recently wrote Work Optional: Retire Early the Non-Penny-Pinching Way. In fact, there’s an entire movement of people retiring in their 30s and 40s—they call it FIRE (financial independence, retire early). Even if you can’t or don’t want to quit work quite that early, you still have the power to bring your retirement date forward a bit—by making smart money moves now.
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Be mindful about money. If you’re putting 15 percent of your income toward retirement, most financial planners will give you an enthusiastic high-five. But to truncate your earning years, you need to save dramatically more. For Hester—who set up automatic payments so that over 50 percent of her paycheck went toward saving, investing, and making extra payments on her mortgage— living on less was made easier by formulating a “money mission statement.” She determined which expenses brought her joy (travel, for instance) and which didn’t (new clothes, unnecessary takeout), and then she attacked the low-joy parts of her budget. “So much of our spending is mindless,” she says. “When you really start tracking, you’ll be surprised by how much you can scale back and save.” Before you stash that extra cash in a retirement account, tackle
any nonmortgage debts, says Deacon Hayes, founder of the financial education company Well Kept Wallet and author of You Can Retire Early! The average American with credit card debt owes $6,929 and will pay an average of $1,141 in interest this year, according to NerdWallet. “Any interest you’re paying is snowballing you in the wrong direction,” says Hayes. If you get that balance to zero, you could bump your yearly retirement contribution by more than a grand and not even feel the pinch. Spending significantly less than you earn may feel uncomfortable, even unfair, but it’s a great way to see how disciplined you’ll be once you’ve kissed your paycheck goodbye. “If the sacrifices feel really onerous, working longer may be more realistic than rushing to retire,” says Jill Kismet, a chartered retirement planning counselor with Plan for Joy in Tucson, Arizona.
F R O M T O P L E F T: J O VA N A M I L A N K O/ S T O C K S Y; G E T T Y I M A G E S
TA N J A H E S T E R I S N O T
3
Get investment savvy. 2
Set a goal (and get a second opinion). For a quick retirement target, some analysts use the 4 percent rule, which loosely means that withdrawing up to 4 percent of your investment portfolio a year will sustain you throughout a 30-year retirement. “So in very broad strokes, if you have $1 million and can live on $40,000 a year, you shouldn’t run out of money for 30 years,” says David Day, a certified financial planner and wealth manager at Gold Metal Waters in Boulder, Colorado. “But in reality, that’s kind of an antiquated calculation.” A proper financial plan needs to take into account factors like rising health care costs (Medicare eligibility doesn’t typically kick in before age 65), increasing longevity, inflation, and the fact that your expenses may be higher if you retire earlier.
Vanguard’s online Retirement Nest Egg Calculator uses what’s known as a Monte Carlo simulation to run 100,000 possible scenarios and estimate the probability of your savings lasting for a certain amount of time. Let’s say your portfolio is spread across stocks, bonds, and cash savings and you hope to quit work at 55 and live on $50,000 a year. With $1 million, there’s only a 73 percent chance your money will last. To get that probability closer to 90 percent, you could aim for more like $1.3 million in savings, scale back your retirement spending to $40,000 a year, or work for an extra eight years. Note: Even if you’re a numbers nerd and love online money tools, it’s worthwhile to ask a feeonly certified financial planner for a second opinion, says Hester.
Typically, pulling funds out of a traditional IRA or 401(k) before age 59½ incurs a 10 percent penalty, plus you have to pay income tax. There are rare exceptions, like the so-called rule of 55, which allows people 55 and over to make withdrawals from their current employer’s 401(k) plan if they leave that job. With a Roth IRA, in which you pay taxes on your contributions up front, you can pull out your principal before age 59½ as long as you’ve had the account open for at least five years. “If you’re thinking of retiring early and you don’t have a Roth IRA, open one and put in a small amount, like $100, if only to start that five-year clock,” says Day. Even then, a Roth IRA isn’t a giant investment vehicle, says Kismet. While you can invest $19,000 this year in a 401(k), the total contribution limit for traditional and Roth IRAs is $6,000 ($7,000 if you’re 50 or over). “If you plan to retire before 59, you need a brokerage account for the majority of your money,” says Kismet. (Think online options, like Betterment or Wealthfront, or more traditional brokerages, like Vanguard or Fidelity.) An easy way to retire with more? Avoid high management fees. A 1 percent fee may not sound like much, but over 30 years it could shrink your portfolio by more than $200,000, according to a NerdWallet analysis. Find a fund with a 0.5 percent fee, and you’ll be sending out invitations to your retirement party that much sooner.
Pick the right retirement account to help your savings grow with the guide at realsimple.com/accounts.
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5 Steps to a More Organized Work Life THESE SIMPLE CHANGES CAN MAKE A BIG D I F F E R E N C E I N Y O U R P R O D U C T I V I T Y. By Sara Gaynes Lev y
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GETTING ORGANIZED ON THE JOB IS ADDICTIVE.
Sure, it takes some momentum to get started, but once you’ve got systems in place that work for you, everything clicks. “It’s kind of like clearing out your fridge—every once in a while, you have to go in deep, but it pays off in the day-to-day,” says Sue Rasmussen, a clutter coach who works with professional women. To kick-start an organization spree in your office, try these tips.
P h o t o g r a p h b y Te d + C h e l s e a C a v a n a u g h
2
Get a handle on your calendar. Put everything you do in a digital calendar—include meetings, yes, but also block off time for eating lunch. “A calendar is a visual manifestation of your time, and you should use it as a plan for your day, not as a place for others to plan your day for you,” says John Zeratsky, coauthor of Make Time: How to Focus on What Matters Every Day. Rasmussen likes Acuity Scheduling, a platform that lets you cross-check your availability with clients and coworkers. An organized calendar can show how well (or poorly) you manage your time, notes Zeratsky. “When weeks feel really crazy, I’ll look back. A bit of reflection helps me plan better in the future.”
1
Revamp your inbox.
P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y H E AT H E R G R E E N E F O R H E L L O A R T I S T S
Assess the emails you receive each day. Getting newsletters or updates that aren’t serving you? Unsubscribe, says productivity consultant Carson Tate, founder of the productivity consulting firm Working Simply. If an email will take less than a few minutes to deal with, do so right away, even if that means deleting or archiving it. If the response needs to be more involved, try changing the subject line to an action item. “Say I got an email about revising a PowerPoint presentation. That’s my action step that I type into the subject line so I don’t have to reread the email,” says Tate. Can your email server automate certain things you often do? Turn common responses into signatures, or try auto-filing: “You can write a rule in Outlook to automatically move messages from direct reports to their file folder,” says Tate, “which is great for finding things later.”
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Quick-clean your space. Aim to reduce the loose papers on your desk, says Rasmussen. (To cut clutter even further, scan the documents you want to keep and create a Google Drive folder for the files so you can access them anywhere.) Sort papers into categories based on whether you need to read them, file them, send yourself on an errand, call someone, or go online to follow up. Feeling overwhelmed by all the paper? Pick just one area of your work space—it can be as small as one drawer or as large as your whole desktop—and clean out anything you know you don’t need. Repeat on more areas until you’ve covered your entire office.
5
Make a smarter to-do list.
Rearrange your digital space too. Borrow the organizational structure that smartphones have. Similar apps (think health apps or shopping apps) can be grouped in folders. Tate suggests using that as a guiding principle for organizing your computer files. Adding dates to folder names can also be helpful; this is a good time to check on your company’s digitalrecords retention guidelines and find out how long you need to store documents and what you can trash. For the documents you keep, “think about how and when you retrieve them,” says Tate. Files you use frequently should be easy to access. “To name files for your retrieval system, look at the document and ask yourself, ‘What is the first thing I think of when I look at this document?’ Whatever comes to mind first is the name of your file,” she says.
Lauren McGoodwin, founder and CEO of Career Contessa, a career site for women, suggests writing down next-day tasks before you leave the office each night. “I try to put my tasks into priority levels. I break them up into ‘high priority,’ ‘easy wins,’ and ‘can wait for the next day,’ ” she says. Doing so helps her include personal to-dos, like exercise, because she can see when she’ll have pockets of time. Whether to make your list digital or analog is up to you. Some research shows that writing a task down can make you more likely to achieve it. Tate says she prefers digital lists because it can be hard to conceptualize future projects if you don’t have a physical space for them in your paper planner; you can easily keep track of future months and years in a digital one.
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M a k i n g I t Wo r k
How do you manage medical appointments and records for your kids and parents? By Jane Por ter
When I was 27, I was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. That really made me realize I was the driver of my recovery and health. I wanted to be in control of what was happening to me. I asked for copies of all my test results and carried around a binder with folders for them. For my three boys, I have a similar system. I keep a file for each of them. If they go to the doctor, I write down the date, the time, and the reason for visiting. Whenever I have an appointment for one of them with the doctor or school, I bring that binder.
RICHARD LUI, 51, MSNBC ANCHOR IN NEW YORK CITY
HEATHER CHAUVIN, 33, ONTARIO, CANADA– BASED HOST OF THE PODCAST MOM IS IN CONTROL
8 2 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
My wife and I sit down on Sunday, go through the week’s calendar, and work out logistics for our five children. I include doctor’s appointments in our Google Calendar so I can get an alert when it’s time to leave. I also always make a follow-up appointment with the doctor before I leave the building. We try to group appointments and do them first thing in the morning or at the end of the day so they don’t disrupt school or chop up my workday.
MATT FORBECK, 50, WRITER AND GAME DESIGNER IN BELOIT, WISCONSIN
YASHIKA DOOLEY, 44, UROGYNECOLOGIST IN SAN ANTONIO
My kids are 12, 13, and 15, and I used to feel like I had no control over our calendar and finances. Now I link my calendar with the kids’ calendars. The more knowledgeable they are about their own appointments, the less of a discussion there has to be. I keep a separate file folder for each of the kids’ medical bills, and once a month I spend two hours sorting through them. I’ve found it’s best to tackle this chore in the morning while I have my cup of coffee.
JACKIE MacDOUGALL, 48, LOS ANGELES– BASED CREATIVE COACH FOR WOMEN OVER 40
Illustration by Andrea Mongia
H E A D S H OTS C O U RT ESY O F SU BJ ECTS
My dad is 86 and has Alzheimer’s. My mother, siblings, or I would accompany him to doctor’s appointments so we could advocate for him and ask the right questions. We used a workbook from the Institute on Aging in San Francisco to keep track of details. His medical records are accessible through his provider’s website, so we can see his medication, appointments, and test results. We also used AARP’s Prepare to Care guide, which lays out everything a caregiver will have to plan for.
I have two children, who are 6 and 8, and my mother lives with me. My mother has had three surgeries. I take pictures of her medication labels and store them in my phone for easy access. I’ve also scanned her records and prescriptions and have them all in the file-hosting service Dropbox. I can easily tap on my phone, open her folder, and show the information to the doctor. You may have to request these records and sign medical release forms, but it’s good to invest the time to do that so you don’t have to worry about it later.
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a friend of mine threw a dinner party, only to discover that nearly everyone coming had a food restriction. Gluten, dairy, nuts, sugar, meat: Our cultural food demons seem to grow by the day. According to a 2016 Pew Research Center survey, 32 percent of Americans believe they have at least one food allergy or intolerance—especially women, who are nearly twice as likely to report food allergies as men. Yet these numbers don’t match official statistics. In 2017, researchers at Harvard Medical School and other institutions analyzed more than 2 million electronic health records and found that only 3.6 percent of adults had doctordocumented food allergies or intolerances. What might explain this bizarre discrepancy? In some cases, of course, people who think they have food sensitivities do not. But another big problem is that the science on how food affects our bodies is still in its infancy. “There’s so much we don’t know,” says professor of gastroenterology and nutrition William Chey, MD, director of the GI Nutrition and Behavioral Health Program at Michigan Medicine at the University of Michigan. Some of these mystery food issues may be real— just misunderstood. A FEW MONTHS AGO,
Gut Feelings MORE OF US THAN EVER ARE E X P E R I E N C I N G STO M AC H T RO U B L E O R O T H E R U N C O M F O RTA B L E R E A C T I O N S A F T E R W E E AT. W H AT G I V E S , A N D W H AT C A N W E D O A B O U T I T ? By Melinda Wenner Moyer
Illustrations by Amy van Luijk
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Allergies More than 170 food ingredients can trigger allergies. The most common are milk, eggs, peanuts, tree nuts, soy, wheat, fish, and shellfish, but you can even be allergic to spices and meat. When people are exposed to a food they’re allergic to, their immune systems attack the ingredient as if it were a dangerous intruder. The response can be mild—causing, say, a local rash—or it can be life-threatening, thrusting the body into an anaphylactic reaction that thwarts breathing and impedes circulation. Some reactions don’t even involve eating. Stephanie Kokabi, 40, once ended up in the hospital after going to a baseball game. “I was wearing flip-flops, and my feet started swelling up because of the peanuts on the ground,” she recalls. When she struggled to breathe, she was rushed to the ER. Tests for food allergies aren’t perfect, though, and their limitations explain some of the mismatch between believed and real food sensitivities. Doctors typically diagnose food allergies with skin pricks or blood tests, but positive results don’t necessarily translate into true allergies. “False positive reports from these tests are around 30 to 40 percent,” says Andres Alvarez Pinzon, MD, PhD,
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clinical research manager at the Sean N. Parker Center for Allergy & Asthma Research at Stanford University. In reality, food allergies are rare, especially among adults (many kids with food allergies eventually grow out of them), but because they are so hard to diagnose, no one knows exactly how many people have them.
Celiac disease When she was a college freshman in Baltimore, Lauren Taylor, now 28, suddenly felt more exhausted than she ever had before, even though she was sleeping 10 hours a night and taking naps. Her doctor diagnosed her with an iron deficiency, and she started taking supplements (if she missed a dose, she’d feel terrible). Eventually, she required an intravenous iron infusion, which prompted her to seek a second opinion. Her new doctor ran a spate of tests. The diagnosis: celiac disease. You’ve probably heard of celiac, which afflicts about 1 percent of Americans. It’s an autoimmune disease caused by an abnormal reaction to gluten, a protein found in wheat, rye, barley, and malt. Eating gluten causes sufferers’ immune systems to attack the small intestine, causing damage to the tiny, fingerlike villi that line
the intestine and absorb nutrients. Diagnosis usually requires a blood test, endoscopy, and biopsy. Taylor’s celiac disease inhibited her body’s ability to absorb iron, which is why she felt so tired. But symptoms can include an itchy, blistery rash, stomach pain, gas, joint pain, depression, migraines, and canker sores. Because symptoms are so varied, the Celiac Disease Foundation estimates that 2.5 million Americans have the disease but don’t even know it. If left untreated, the disease can cause serious problems, including infertility and nerve damage. There is no cure, but there is a simple—though not always delicious—method of prevention: avoiding gluten.
The gluten mystery Celiac isn’t the only reason people avoid gluten. A 2015 Gallup poll found that one in five Americans— many of them not celiac sufferers— eat gluten-free, and the number has likely gone up since. Why? Many people complain that gluten makes them feel gassy and bloated and causes them to gain weight. But scientists and doctors have had trouble confirming these claims. A handful of factors are likely at play, they say, and gluten may not always be the culprit. Some people who avoid gluten don’t need to. Several studies suggest that when people just think
they’re eating gluten, they believe they feel bad; that’s an example of what experts call the “nocebo effect.” This tendency could in part be due to the fact that gluten has developed such a bad reputation of late. Still, there are reasons to suspect that gluten-containing foods could cause problems. In a 2016 study, researchers at Columbia University Medical Center and other institutions found that people who said they experienced adverse reactions to wheat but who did not have celiac disease did, nonetheless, have more inflammation and markers of intestinal damage. But gluten may not always be the problem. Wheat also contains tiny carbohydrates that our intestines can’t digest very well and that are known to cause bloating and flatulence. Clinical trials suggest that among patients with irritable bowel syndrome, a condition characterized by bloating, gas, and diarrhea, at least half feel better when they avoid eating some of these carbs, known as FODMAPs (an easier way to say “fermentable oligosac-
charides, disaccharides, monosaccharides, and polyols”). Indeed, gastroenterologist Stefano Guandalini, MD, founder of the University of Chicago Celiac Disease Center, says he believes the “vast majority” of people without celiac disease who have stomach issues after eating wheat are reacting to FODMAPs, not gluten. Most people with FODMAP sensitivity are only reacting to a handful of FODMAPs, so to manage the sensitivity, doctors first try to identify the key culprits. They start by putting sufferers on a diet low in all FODMAPs—cutting out many foods, including garlic, onions, beans, wheat, dairy, and certain fruits—and then slowly add FODMAP sources one at a time to see which ones are causing the problems. Ultimately, then, “there are multiple reasons why people may develop symptoms and associations after eating wheat, and they’re not mutually exclusive,” says Chey. (To complicate the issue further, it’s also possible to be allergic to certain proteins in wheat other than gluten. Wheat allergies can cause hives, vomiting, and diarrhea.)
Dairy dilemmas If you feel off after eating dairy, you’re not alone. About 65 percent of adults are lactose intolerant, meaning they don’t produce an enzyme called lactase, which is essential for breaking down the dairy sugar lactose. When lactose isn’t digested, you can experience bloating, gas, and sometimes diarrhea. Yet you don’t have to eschew dairy entirely if you’re lactose intolerant. Hard cheeses and yogurt tend to be low in lactose, so they cause fewer problems. Before you have your first bite of dairy, you can also take an over-the-counter pill, such as Lactaid, which provides the missing digestive enzyme. (Less than 1 percent of adults suffer from true milk allergies, which can cause hives and anaphylaxis.) Of course, people avoid dairy for other reasons too. Paleo and Whole30 dieters are told to avoid dairy because it supposedly incites inflammation, while keto dieters avoid dairy because of its sugars. “Dairy-free is absolutely trending right now,” says registered dietitian and nutritionist Amy Shapiro, founder of the New York City– based Real Nutrition. But is dairy really inflammatory? According to a 2017 meta-analysis, the opposite is true. Researchers concluded
Some people who avoid gluten don’t need to. Several studies suggest that when people just think they’re eating gluten, they believe they feel bad; that’s an example of the “nocebo effect.”
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that among people who aren’t allergic, dairy products (especially fermented products, such as yogurt) “have anti-inflammatory properties.” Dairy also provides important nutrients, such as protein, phosphorus, and calcium. Many American women don’t get enough calcium as it is.
SIGNS AND SYMP TOMS TO LO OK FOR Food allergies often cause: • Rash or red skin
Other food enigmas
• Itchy mouth or ears
Doctors know quite a bit about allergies, celiac disease, and dairy intolerance—but there are plenty of food-related issues that physicians are only just starting to figure out. Here’s the thing, says Chey: There are dozens of compounds in any given food, and your gastrointestinal system may handle them differently depending on the substance, time of day, what you ate before them, and whether they’re liquids or solids. “Food is complicated,” he says, so it makes sense that our bodies may have complicated reactions to it. We will need much more research before we get clear answers to many big food questions, but if you’re having weird symptoms after you eat and you don’t know why, find a doctor who will take your concerns seriously. Despite what wellness blogs may suggest, don’t try to make a bunch of dietary changes on your own, warns Guandalini, because you
• Nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, or stomach pain
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• Runny nose, sneezing, or cough • Trouble swallowing • Shortness of breath or chest pain • Loss of consciousness Adult celiac is more likely to cause: • Iron-deficiency anemia • Fatigue • Bone or joint pain or arthritis • Osteoporosis
could develop nutritional deficiencies, and you may not succeed in uncovering the root of the problem. As for what kind of doctor to consult, Chey suggests seeing your primary care provider first, who may be able to discern, based on your symptoms, what kind of specialist might be best—a gastroenterologist, allergist, or dietitian, for instance. And if your doctor is utterly dismissive? “That’s a big red flag,” says Chey, a sign it’s time to get another opinion.
• Liver and biliary tract disorders • Depression or anxiety • Tingling, numbness, or pain in the hands and feet • Seizures or migraines • Missed periods • Infertility or recurrent miscarriage • Canker sores • Itchy, blistery rash
Ahhh... Deep breathing is a wonderful way to both wake up and release tension. Begin by lying down and giving your toes a little wiggle. Touch the crown of your head to become more attuned to the top of your body. As you breathe in, imagine your inhale traveling down to your toes. As you exhale, feel your breath moving back up to the crown of your head. Take another inhale, just down to your knees, and an exhale back up. Keep going, breathing into your pelvis and exhaling to your crown. Into your belly and out to your crown. Into your chest and out. Into your jaw and out. From there, take the return journey down the length of the body. By the time you’re done, you should feel more relaxed and alert.
STO C KSY
— E D W A R D J O N E S , n o w y o g a n y. c o m
Photograph by Seth Mourra
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BABETH LAFON
Summer is the season to toss fussy entertaining rules out the open window, into the breeze. Read these pages to erase every anxiety that might be keeping you from the fun of having people over: prep, hosting, menus, and more. Then invite some friends over for a notso-perfectly-planned party—tonight.
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S T I L L O R S PA R K L I N G ?
W A N T T O B E P R E PA R E D T O PA R T Y A T A MOMENT’S NOTICE? KEEP THESE ITEMS ON H A N D A S Y O U R A N Y T I M E - H O S T I N G K I T.
Plan for Year-Round Use
D OUBLE DUT Y For a super low-key celebration, butcher paper is a rustic- and carefree-looking table covering that can be recycled after the event. Kayne recommends leaving out crayons in mason jars for kids (or, uh, grownups) to decorate the paper with.
T O B U Y: (Previous spread) Hay Kaleido Trays in Peach, from $17; store.moma.org. All Day & Night Dip Dishes, $26 for 4; yearandday.com. Hay Plank Boards, from $20; hay.com. Marta Double Old Fashioned Glasses, $16 for 8; cb2.com. Mason Jar Drink Dispenser, $69, and Silver Metal Drink Dispenser Stand, $30; potterybarn.com. Veneerware Fancy Bamboo Plates, from $8 for 8, and Knife, Fork, Spoon Sets, $10 for 24; bambuhome.com. Bowl with Lid in Coral Red, $26; zarahome.com. Raawii Strom Jug, $75 (small); store.moma.org. Color Burst Melamine Plate, $14; shopterrain.com. Modern Melamine Dinner Plates, $8 each, and Salad Plates, $6 each; westelm.com. (This spread) Arrows Ice Bucket, $52; katiekime.com.
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KEEP IT CO OL
“We keep a marble cheese stone in the freezer for when we have guests over,” says Real Simple beauty director Heather Muir Maffei. “It keeps cheese from getting too soft and makes me feel instantly pulled together.” TO BUY: Scalloped White Marble Cheese Board, $24; williams-sonoma.com.
“ W H AT C A N I BRING?” When guests ask how they can help, ask them to bring ice—you can never have too much.
M A R B L E C H E ES E STO N E A N D B OT T L E STO P P E R : P E T E R A R D I TO
When it comes to the basic supplies, stick to classic neutrals you can use any time of year. Jenni Kayne, a Los Angeles–based designer and the author of Pacific Natural: Simple Seasonal Entertaining, says her go-to items are wooden cutting boards for appetizers and linen or burlap table runners. She also has simple glasses that can be used for water, cocktails, or wine (try the Marta Double Old Fashioned Glasses, $16 for 8; cb2.com). “If you have these things,” says Kayne, “you don’t need to reinvent the wheel every time you entertain.”
“We’re big fans of our SodaStream: When guests ask for water, we can say, ‘Sparkling or still?,’ and they are pretty delighted! We also like to have interesting bitters, like orange or cucumber. A few drops of them in a glass of seltzer makes for a really nice, basically booze-free beverage.” —Anna Maltby, Real Simple deputy editor
Serveware Suggestions
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Use a mix of leftover plates, napkins, and utensils from past parties, says Joy Cho, founder and creative director of Oh Joy, an L.A.-based design studio. A “mishmash of plates” (from brands like Oh Happy Day, Meri Meri, and Harlow & Grey, plus Target’s Cheeky line) can feel fun and festive.
2
San Francisco designer Allison Pickart recommends bamboo plates and utensils as opposed to plastic ones, because they’re biodegradable and can be composted. TO BUY: Veneerware Fancy Bamboo Plates, from $8 for 8; bambuhome.com.
3 P R E S E RV E YO U R BUBBLES Keep an open bottle of prosecco carbonated with the help of a bottle stopper (like Williams Sonoma Open Kitchen Champagne Stopper, $7; williams-sonoma.com). “It will even allow you to store opened bottles on their sides in the fridge,” says Real Simple features editor Elizabeth Sile.
F R E S H P E R S P EC T I V E For quick and casual flower arrangements that don’t interfere with cross-table conversation, use simple glass jars as low vessels and arrange one type of bloom in each.
Katie Holdefehr, senior editor at RealSimple.com, keeps cute paper straws in her cabinet. “They make any drink feel partyworthy and photo-ready.” Check out Shop Sweet Lulu and Coterie Party for a rainbow of options.
T R A S H TA L K
Stock heavy-duty garbage bags, says Real Simple food director Dawn Perry. “Regular bags just can’t handle the wet garbage.” Set out at least three containers to collect the trash (label one for recycling, one for compost, and a third for the landfill).
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S H E W A S T H E Q U E E N O F M U LT I P L E - C O U R S E , OV E R-T H E -T O P M E N U S. S O W H Y DID HER GUE ST S SEEM S O GLUM? BY L AUREN MECHLING
M Y R O C K B O T T O M WA S A C O C O N U T.
Not just any coconut, but a perfectly symmetrical, unblemished orb that I spent no less than 10 minutes hand-selecting among so many organic specimens at the green market. I was hosting a dinner party, you see, and I’d decided to cook a shrimp stir-fry from a recipe in an obscure Thai cookbook. The recipe was three pages long and called not for shredded coconut or coconut cream or coconut chunks, but for a fully intact coconut that the home cook was to render into shards by hurling, javelinlike, onto the ground. This was back when I lived in an apartment with roommates whose communal spirit did not extend to the kitchen table. Home cooking generally meant fixing myself a salad or a bowl of Grape-Nuts—with raisins when I wanted to be wild. There was no point in proper cooking if it was only for myself, was the way I saw it, and no point in cooking for others if I wasn’t going to wow my assembled guests by sprinkling candied rose petals onto a homemade Meyer lemon tart or, you know, lobbing a coconut off a second-floor balcony. Entertaining was a performance, and I was going for a standing ovation every time. An older friend and her husband kindly let me host the coconut night in their apartment. They lived in a garden duplex, with an iron balcony overlooking a brick ground that lent itself to the coconut explosion. My guests arrived one by one, and I made sure they were wildly impressed before they tasted so much as a morsel. I’d mixed a batch of rum punch and put out enough tea lights to concern any fire department. There were so many side dishes too—side dishes that had no business accompanying a spicy seafood main, but no matter. Why couldn’t I also serve warm gougères and a dill-inflected white borscht? I scurried around the home that was not my own like a harried diner
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waitress, proffering trays and platters and pours of wine. The main course was perfectly edible, savory, and fragrant with ginger and lemongrass. I had seconds, then spent a good while in the bathroom extracting coconut from my teeth. My elaborate feasts went on over the years, each more over-the-top than the last. Osso buco, blood sausage cassoulet, pork and chive dumplings I stuffed by hand and served with a trio—a trio!—of dipping sauces. My parties were successful, I guess, but that’s not the same as saying I enjoyed them. I mean, I certainly enjoyed being the kind of person who appeared to be capable of whipping up paellas and blackberry blintzes. But my memories of these nights make me tired. They involve my washing dishes
between courses and not hearing much of the conversations around me. Everything was in place, everything and everybody looked good. There was just one thing: Nobody was having that much fun. Read all the cookbooks you want—there’s no recipe for that. As I got older, the gap between dinner-party food and food I actually ate narrowed. The contents of my grocery bag became less pathetic as my repertoire expanded to include fried eggs and roast chicken. Things started to change in other ways too. I met somebody I became serious about, an intelligent and soft-spoken man whose idea of a good time is talking to interesting people, not being stranded in a room with 15 near-strangers while his partner is in another slaughtering a coconut. He taught me things, about art and Japanese film and the pleasure of sitting—not sprinting—around a table with friends.
Bit by bit, our gatherings have become virtually unrecognizable to those who knew me before. Now the invites go out later, sometimes the morning of. The table is not set so much as cleared, ready for people to bring their plates over and take a seat. No matter how much Ben and I straighten up beforehand, there are always toys on the rug, a book I’m in the middle of reading hanging off a window ledge. We’ve adapted. When people ask how they can help, I guide them to the nearest cutting board. Ever the multitasker, Ben tidies up while he pours drinks. I’ve left the place cards to our daughter, who is 4 and cannot spell but has a fantastic sense of color. Don’t get me wrong: I am all for elaborate dinner parties. We have friends who put together meals whose mystically foraged salads or wild flower arrangements alone belong in international art fairs—and the nights when I scroll through Instagram and see we were not invited to their dinner parties bring me great sadness. But when it comes to my own turf, there’s a little less stagecraft involved. There are no courses—just olives and a cheese (a single cheese on a board, not a cheese board). Then we head to the table for a salad and a no-fuss main (slow cooker chili, spaghetti Bolognese, or a bouillabaisse that takes one hour to prepare and is so delicious I cook it over and over, no matter how recently I’ve already served it to my guests). Around the middle of dinner I will remember something important—to pass out napkins, to put the music on. And you know what? These dinners are so much better. There is a looseness to them that lends itself to intimacy. Nobody complains about missing my pavlovas or candied lavender. Now it’s ice cream for dessert, maybe with a drizzle of honey or berries. We laugh more, sit around the table longer. I don’t wake up feeling spent, dreading a sink full of five courses’ worth of pots and pans. Instead I put on the coffee while Ben goes out for the paper. When he joins me, we flip through our favorite sections and find ourselves talking about who we want to have over next. LAUREN MECHLING IS THE AUTHOR OF HOW COULD SHE. SHE LIVES IN NEW YORK CITY.
STA S H T H E S E B A S I C S A N D B A R B E C U E U P G R A D E S I N Y O U R PA N T RY, F R E E Z E R , A N D F R I D G E A N D Y O U ’ L L B E R E A D Y F O R A N Y G U E S T W H O S W I N G S B Y.
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D O N ’ T S W E AT I T
Add to Cart Keep the food low-key (burgers, tacos), but bring the meal to the next level with an assortment of condiments. If you like, you can fancy up your spread by serving them in ramekins. A few ideas: “I grew up eating my granny’s homemade chicken fingers, and she always served them with Billy Bee Honey Mustard. It’s perfectly sweet and has a delightful tanginess that adds a welcome zip to chicken salad, chicken fingers, or even hamburgers.” —Brandi Broxson, Real Simple senior editor “Sir Kensington’s Special Sauce adds a little something, well, special to sandwiches. I also love a sprinkle of flaky sea salt on meat or grilled vegetables as an elevated finishing touch.” —Ananda Eidelstein, Real Simple food editor “I’m obsessed with Yellowbird hot sauce for all things, but especially for tacos and eggs. I have the habanero—which is perfectly not-kill-your-mouth hot—and blue agave sriracha in my fridge at all times.” —Elizabeth Sile, Real Simple features editor
Fill a colander with ice and set it over a serving bowl so the water drains as the ice melts. Place veggies on top and they’ll stay crisp and crunchy for as long as the dip lasts.
ORDER IN There’s no shame in outsourcing cooking. Use these tricks to choose delivery options that travel well and last throughout the party. • Cucumber or grain
salad, grilled chicken, lemon bars, and brownies are crowd-pleasers that won’t wilt. • Ask for dressings on
the side and toppings packaged separately to keep ingredients fresh. • Plate food on nice
platters, scoop sauces into bowls, spritz food with lemon, and you’re good to go. Save delivery dishes to send leftovers home with guests. • Use the “catering”
category on Seamless or Grubhub for large orders.
T O B U Y: Maldon Sea Salt Flakes, $6; amazon.com. Gulden’s Spicy Brown Mustard, $1.30; guldens.com for stores. Billy Bee Original Honey Mustard, $2.20; Amazon Prime Pantry. Sir Kensington’s Special Sauce, $5; sirkensingtons.com for stores. Martin’s Potato Rolls, $4; target.com for stores. Yellowbird Hot Sauce, from $5; yellowbirdsauce.com. Topo Chico Mineral Water; topochicousa.net for stores. Canada Dry Tonic, $4.50 for 6; target.com for stores.
B I G B ATC H B E V E R A G E S Anyone can make a fun boozy drink with items they likely already have in the fridge, says Dawn Mauberret, a Brooklyn, New York–based wedding and event planner. She suggests mixing rosé or white wine with flavored seltzer (grapefruit or blood orange is ideal, with a ratio of one bottle of wine to one liter of seltzer) and tossing in some fresh herbs, like basil, mint, or rosemary. Serve it over ice in a punch bowl. Pickart keeps pink lemonade concentrate in the freezer because it’s easy to spike with alcohol and looks great served from a dispenser with a spigot.
S W E E T T R E AT S Keep your freezer stocked with something sweet to finish off the meal. Delight guests with mochi bites (try My/Mo Mochi Ice Cream; mymomochi.com for stores) or classic-for-areason refreshments (like Snickers Ice Cream Bars; target.com for stores).
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R E L A X : T H I S PA R T Y I S G O I N G T O B E F U N . B U T I N C A S E O F E M E R G E N C Y, B R E A K O U T T H E S E M A G I C W O R D S . BY CATHERINE NEWMAN
“Just bring yourselves” This is always a nice thing to say, followed by “I’m keeping it super simple.” Impromptu means smoothing out the road between here and getting to see your people: no time to fret or fuss or cancel—and no requirement that your guests procure prosciutto or make an orzo salad. Should anyone press (“I’m bringing something anyway, so tell me what would be helpful”), then feel free to suggest a specific contribution: a quart of vanilla ice cream to go with the pie, a bottle of prosecco for those cucumber cocktails. Otherwise folks will likely bring wine or flowers, which you can really never have too much of.
“I’m so glad you’re here” This functions as the perfect allpurpose hosting mantra. Even though the sentiment should be clear in everything you do, it’s also a wonderful thing to say out loud. It’s especially soothing to someone who’s shown up early, late, or uninvited (your friend’s out-of-town cousin, say) or to anyone who’s fretting about arriving empty-handed. It might also reassure you, if you’ve lost sight of the point of the gathering because your chicken breasts got a little too charbroiled.
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“Please help yourself ” There’s wine on the patio, a pitcher of margaritas in the fridge, nibbles in every room. If you do just the tiniest bit of prep—get out the glasses, open a bottle or two, put out some corn nuts and crudités—then everyone can happily bartend for themselves while you baste the chickens or hide the takeout boxes. As long as there’s boozy drinks, boozeless drinks, and plenty to munch on, dinner can basically take forever or never get served at all and everyone will still have a great time.
“Tell us about your…” “Come help me for a minute” This graciously rescues awkward or introverted folks from conversations they don’t want to be having (or aren’t having anyway), and it can keep someone who maybe shouldn’t pour another glass of wine from pouring another glass of wine. Plus, you get the help you might actually need. “Would you mind…dressing this salad? Spooning this rice into a serving bowl? Counting out 20 forks?” Asking for help from whoever arrives first is also a gracious face-saver: “I’m so glad you’re here! I could really use a hand with the watermelon. Let me get you an apron.”
Worst summer job. Best-ever meal. Most persistently recurring anxiety dream. A mini arsenal of conversation sparkers is a great resource for dealing with shy folks, political heat, or ice that needs breaking. “What would you be doing during the zombie apocalypse?” is especially engaging for younger guests. (So much better than “How’s school?” Trust me.)
“There’s plenty” Another terrifically versatile hosting sentiment. If a guest forgets to bring the baguettes or remembers to bring their ravenous teenager or grimaces guiltily over the incriminating heap of shrimp tails on their plate, you can reassure them. (“We figured we’d order pizza if the food ran out” is another comforting sentence.) Improv hosts—really, all hosts—want to communicate abundance. “I’m relaxed,” is what you’re saying, “so you can go ahead and relax too.”
“I always hated that…” Glass, plate, couch, carpet, cactus. A houseful of festive folks means that stuff might suffer. Spilling, dropping, breaking, and trampling are all party possibilities, and your guests are likely to be much more upset than you are about a ruined object. So put them at ease by communicating that you value people over things and by making them laugh in their moment of embarrassment. (“Finally! An excuse to get rid of that awful rug. Thank you.”) And don’t follow up with too much fussy scrubbing or sweeping, or you’ll undermine the credibility of your chillness.
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IF NOT ALL GUESTS KNOW ONE ANOTHER, A L I T T L E E N T E RTA I N M E N T C A N G E T T H E B A L L R O L L I N G ( S O M E T I M E S L I T E R A L LY ) .
P I C K YO U R P L AY L I S T S
Music-streaming services make it simple to keep a playbook of playlists. DJ Taiga of Remixologists, an events company in New York and Philadelphia, recommends the playlists “Indie Dinner Party,” “Jazzy Dinner,” and “Feel Good Dinner” on Spotify. You could also try Pandora stations like “Hipster Cocktail Party,” “Classic Soul BBQ,” and “Brunch Cafe.” Spotify even has “The Cleaning Playlist,” which is full of sing-along classics that make pre- or post-party cleanup more bearable. If you don’t have time to queue up a playlist, ask a willing guest to play DJ, suggests Michael Smith Boyd, an Atlanta-based designer and the star of Buying It Blind on Bravo.
K E E P I T M OV I N G Debra Fine, author of The Fine Art of Small Talk, suggests some respectful wrap-up lines to keep you mingling (or, OK, to escape a less-than-sparkling conversation).
Break the Ice Help get the conversation started by setting out some games. A deck of trivia cards left on an ottoman can spur conversation. “Someone will draw a card and ask, ‘Who was the 40th president of United States?,’ and then it just draws people in,” says Pickart. Your smart home hub may also have crowd-pleasing games to choose from. On the Google Nest Hub Max, try a classic such as Truth or Dare or a trivia game such as I’m Feeling Lucky. Or check out Alexa’s true-crime games (for mature audiences), in which your group solves a murder together. Bosch: A Detective’s Case is exciting and just hard enough.
T O B U Y: Ridley’s Games Room Backgammon Set, $24; amazon.com. Google Nest Hub Max, $229; store.google.com to preorder. Sunbrella Tropical Leaf Outdoor Throw Pillow (similar to shown), $65; worldmarket.com. Ridley’s Games Tumbling Blocks, $25; amazon.com. Yellow Dot Serving Tray, $68, and Alexander Peach Playing Card Set, $110; wolfum.com. Ridley’s Games Bizarre Facts Quiz, $12; amazon.com. Alma Teal Domino Set, $68; wolfum.com. JBL Charge 4 in Forest Green, $150; jbl.com. Switch Board Game, $25; wandpdesign.com. Sun Squad Bocce Ball Set, $20; target.com.
T H E S T R A I G H T F O RWA R D E X I T:
“I have to make sure I catch up with people I work with.” T H E O N E - L A S T-T H I N G E X I T:
“I need to take off, but before I do, what is the best show you’re watching these days?” T H E C O M P L I M E N T E X I T:
“This sounds like the trip of a lifetime, but I have to run.”
S E AT S M A RT S When it’s time to eat, don’t be afraid to ask people to sit next to or across from at least one person they don’t know well. The directive feels impromptu, but guests will appreciate the structure to branch out.
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Grab a Seat
SET THE MO OD
A FEW THINGS TO A SSESS BEFORE THE DOORBELL RINGS
Creating the right atmosphere with lighting is simple: Turn on lamps or dim all the overhead lighting to midlevel. Do this before the party starts so you don’t have to fuss with the lighting once it gets dark.
QUICK CLEAN If you have time to refresh just one area before guests arrive, let it be the bathroom: the one spot where visitors will be on their own with nothing but their thoughts and wandering eyes. Follow these three quick steps from Melissa Homer, chief cleaning officer of the national cleaning service MaidPro: Vacuum hair off the floor, use a disinfectant wipe around the sink and outside the toilet, and give the inside of the toilet bowl a cursory scrub. Stash at least five rolls of toilet paper in the bathroom, says Pickart, so nobody is left stranded.
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When it comes to seating, call on neighbors or your best friends to haul over chairs. Alternatively, arrange pillows and extra blankets on the floor for an inviting and casual seating arrangement. If you plan to entertain often, invest in a set of stacking stools that can be tucked away when not in use or double as a side table (try the Bentwood Stacking Stools, $22 each; bedbathandbeyond.com).
P RO T I P
David Stark, chief creative officer of David Stark Design and Production in Brooklyn, New York, keeps tapered candles in his freezer, since cold wax can burn more slowly and drip less. He also buys inexpensive packs of votive candles from Ikea to keep on hand for lastminute lighting needs. TO BUY: Glimma Unscented Tealights, $4 for 100; ikea.com/us.
W E C A N M A K E T H I S E A S Y, O R W E C A N M A K E T H I S R E A L LY, R E A L LY E A S Y. T A K E Y O U R P I C K A N D I M P R E S S A N Y K I N D O F G U E S T.
S U P E R E A SY Serve chips right from the bag: Snip a two-inch slit on one end and roll down the bag until you reach chips. No bowl necessary!
Cluster the potted succulents you already own on your table for decoration.
Set out a bottle of gin, vodka, and/or tequila, plus small bottles of tonic or soda. Serve alongside a bowl of citrus wedges for a DIY cocktail bar.
Add paper straws to beverages for a festive touch.
Ask guests to bring lawn games for entertainment.
Place bunches of herbs upright in small water glasses. Use as centerpieces and encourage guests to garnish their own plates. Make Summer Squash with Scallions, Chile, and Parsley (page 111).
LO O K S C A S UA L
LO O K S I M P R E SS I V E Hack your hummus: With the back of a spoon, make a divot in the middle and add olive oil, pine nuts, and herbs.
Make Cantaloupe with Honey, Lime, and Mascarpone (page 110).
Make Summer Berry Trifle with Elderflower Cream (page 111).
Make TomatoBurrata Toasts (page 110).
Blow up balloons as inexpensive decoration and entertainment for your younger guests.
S L I G H T LY AMBITIOUS
Make Fritto Misto with Pepperoncini Mayo (page 111).
These three inspiring summer spreads are easy on the cook and even better for a crowd. Follow our menus, mix and match, or serve one standout alongside burgers and dogs.
MENU #1 Marinated fennel and olives Tomato-burrata toasts Grilled lamb with plum mostarda and blistered shishitos Cantaloupe with honey, lime, and mascarpone
REAL SIMPLE
107
MENU #2 Fritto misto with pepperoncini mayo Summer squash with scallions, chile, and parsley Eggplant, feta, and lemon tart Summer berry trifle with elderflower cream
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MENU #1 M A R I N AT E D F E N N E L AND OLIVES ACTIVE TIME 10 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 25 MINUTES SERVES 6
1 fennel bulb, thinly sliced, plus 1 Tbsp. fronds
GRILLED LAMB WITH P LU M M O S TA R DA A N D BLISTERED SHISHITOS ACTIVE TIME 35 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 1 HOUR, 35 MINUTES SERVES 8
1/4 cup white wine vinegar
5 Tbsp. olive oil, divided
1/8 tsp. kosher salt
1 shallot, chopped
1 cup mixed olives 1/2 cup olive oil 1 tsp. lemon zest plus 1 Tbsp. fresh juice (from 1 lemon) 1/2 tsp. crushed red pepper (optional) sliced fennel and fronds with vinegar and salt in a medium bowl. Let stand for 5 minutes. TOSS
DRAIN fennel (discard vinegar). Add olives, oil, lemon zest and juice, and crushed red pepper, if using. Let stand for at least 15 minutes before serving. Refrigerate, covered, up to 5 days in advance; serve at room temperature.
T O M AT O - B U R R ATA TOA STS ACTIVE TIME 10 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 10 MINUTES SERVES 8
Toss 1 lb. sliced tomatoes with 1/3 cup olive oil and 1/2 tsp. flaky salt. Let stand for 5 minutes. Drizzle 8 thick slices toasted crusty bread with olive oil and rub with garlic; top with tomatoes and 8 oz. torn burrata. Top with flaky salt, tomato oil, 2 Tbsp. fresh oregano leaves, and several grinds of freshly ground black pepper.
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2 Tbsp. yellow mustard seeds 2 Tbsp. granulated sugar 2 Tbsp. red wine vinegar 1 lb. plums, pitted and chopped 5 1/4 tsp. kosher salt, divided 1 5-lb. boneless leg of lamb, butterflied and trimmed 2 Tbsp. finely chopped fresh thyme or oregano 2 tsp. freshly ground black pepper, plus more for serving 12 oz. shishito peppers 1 tsp. flaky sea salt 1 tablespoon oil in a small saucepan over medium. Add shallot and mustard seeds; cook, stirring occasionally, until seeds begin to pop, about 1 minute. Add sugar, vinegar, and 1/4 cup water; cook, stirring occasionally, until sugar dissolves, about 1 minute. Add plums; cook, stirring often, until mixture is thickened and plums are soft, about 6 minutes. Stir in 3/4 teaspoon kosher salt. Transfer to a bowl, cover, and refrigerate until ready to serve. (Mostarda can be made and refrigerated up to 3 days in advance.) HEAT
lamb all over with 2 tablespoons oil; season with thyme, black pepper, and 4 teaspoons kosher salt. RUB
Let rest at room temperature for at least 30 minutes and up to 1 hour. (Lamb can be seasoned and refrigerated up to 1 day in advance. Bring to room temperature before grilling.) grill for mediumhigh indirect heat. Place lamb over direct heat and grill, uncovered, flipping once, until charred in spots and grill marks appear, about 8 minutes per side. PREPARE
lamb to indirect heat. Place a large cast-iron skillet over direct heat. Grill lamb, covered, until a thermometer inserted in thickest portion registers 140°F for medium, 10 to 12 minutes. Transfer to a cutting board; let rest for 15 minutes before slicing. MOVE
shishitos with remaining 2 tablespoons oil. Add to skillet and cook, tossing, until blistered in spots, 6 to 8 minutes. Season with remaining 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt. TOSS
lamb with flaky salt and black pepper. Serve with shishitos and mostarda. SEASON
C A N TA L O U P E W I T H H O N E Y, L I M E , AND MASCARPONE ACTIVE TIME 15 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 15 MINUTES SERVES 8
Stir together 1 cup mascarpone cheese and 1 Tbsp. honey until smooth. Spread mixture on a platter. Toss 8 cups chopped cantaloupe with 1 Tbsp. each granulated sugar and lime juice in a large bowl; let stand for 5 minutes. Arrange cantaloupe over mascarpone. Top with 1/3 cup chopped salted pistachios and 2 tsp. lime zest. Drizzle with 2 Tbsp. lime juice. Serve immediately or cover and refrigerate for up to 4 hours.
MENU #2 FRIT TO MISTO WITH PEPPERONCINI M AY O ACTIVE TIME 35 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 3 5 MINUTES SERVES 6
1/2 cup mayonnaise 4 pepperoncini, chopped 2 Tbsp. capers, chopped 1 tsp. Dijon mustard 1/2 tsp. black pepper Vegetable oil, for frying
in 4 batches, dip squid, shrimp, green beans, and onion rings into batter; using tongs, remove, shake off excess batter, and add to oil. Cook, stirring and separating as needed, until golden and crispy, 2 to 3 minutes. Transfer to rack and season with salt. Transfer baking sheet to oven to keep warm between batches. WORKING
with pepperoncini mayo and lemon wedges. SERVE
1 cup all-purpose flour 1/2 cup cornstarch 1 tsp. baking powder 1/2 tsp. kosher salt, plus more for serving 1 1/2 cups club soda 1 lb. cleaned squid (tubes and tentacles), cut into 1-in. rings, rinsed and patted dry 1/2 lb. peeled, deveined tail-on large shrimp 1/2 lb. green beans, trimmed 1 small red onion, sliced 1/2 in. thick Lemon wedges, for serving together mayonnaise, pepperoncini, capers, mustard, and pepper. Cover and refrigerate until ready to serve. (Mayo can be made up to 3 days in advance.) STIR
oven to 225°F. Fill a large heavy-bottomed pot with 3 inches of oil; heat oil over medium to 375°F. Set a wire rack inside a rimmed baking sheet. PREHEAT
S UMMER S Q UA SH WITH SCALLIONS, C H I L E , A N D PA R S L E Y ACTIVE TIME 15 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 1 5 MINUTES SERVES 6
Toss 2 lb. thinly sliced summer squash or zucchini with 1 cup parsley leaves, 4 sliced scallions, 3 Tbsp. red wine vinegar, 1 seeded and sliced serrano
chile, and 1 1/2 tsp. kosher salt in a large bowl. (Mixture can be tossed and refrigerated up to 1 day in advance.) Toss 1/2 cup chopped roasted, salted almonds with 1/4 cup oil, 1/2 tsp. black pepper, and 1/4 tsp. kosher salt. Add to squash mixture and toss to combine.
E G G P L A N T, F E T A , A N D L E M O N TA RT ACTIVE TIME 20 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 1 HOUR, 10 MINUTES SERVES 6
1 sheet frozen puff pastry, thawed according to package directions 2 small eggplants, unpeeled, thinly sliced 2 lemons, thinly sliced and seeded 1/4 tsp. black pepper 1/4 cup plus 3 Tbsp. olive oil, divided 1 tsp. kosher salt, divided 8 oz. feta cheese, thinly sliced 2 Tbsp. za’atar
oven to 400°F. Roll puff pastry on a sheet of parchment paper to a 14-by-10-inch rectangle. Transfer parchment and pastry to a baking sheet. Prick pastry all over with a fork, leaving a 1-inch border. Refrigerate for at least 10 minutes and up to 1 hour. PREHEAT
MEANWHILE, toss eggplants, lemons, pepper, 3 tablespoons oil, and 1/2 teaspoon salt in a bowl. Spread in an even layer on a rimmed baking sheet. Bake until eggplants and lemons are soft, 13 to 15 minutes.
pastry from refrigerator. Top evenly with feta. Shingle eggplants and lemons on top. Season with remaining 1/2 teaspoon salt. Stir together za’atar and remaining 1/4 cup oil in a small bowl; drizzle half over eggplants and lemons. REMOVE
BAKE until pastry is golden brown, about 25 minutes. Drizzle with remaining za’atar oil. Serve warm or at room temperature.
S U M M E R B E R RY TRIFLE WITH ELDERFLOWER CRE AM ACTIVE TIME 15 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 15 MINUTES SERVES 16
Beat 3 cups heavy cream with 1/4 cup elderflower liqueur until soft peaks form. Layer cream with 12 oz. crushed cookies (gingersnaps, speculoos, or vanilla wafers) and 3 1/2 lb. mixed fresh berries, creating 3 layers of each.
flour, cornstarch, baking powder, and salt in a large bowl. Slowly add club soda, whisking to combine. WHISK
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MENU #3 Toasted Israeli couscous with corn and herbs Little Gems and radishes with ricotta salata and seeds Mussels and clams with tomatoes and tarragon Nectarine olive oil cake
MENU #3 TOA STED ISR AELI COUSCOUS WITH CORN AND HERBS ACTIVE TIME 30 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 1 HOUR SERVES 8
1/3 cup plus 3 Tbsp. olive oil, divided 3 yellow onions, thinly sliced 1 Tbsp. kosher salt, divided 2 cups Israeli couscous 2 1/2 cups fresh corn kernels (from 4 ears) 1 cup packed fresh basil leaves, torn if large 1/2 cup chopped fresh chives 1/2 cup packed fresh dill, chopped 3 Tbsp. white wine vinegar 1/2 tsp. black pepper 2 tablespoons oil in a large skillet over medium. Add onions and 1/2 teaspoon salt; cook, stirring occasionally, until golden brown, 12 to 15 minutes. Transfer to a bowl and let cool. HEAT
LITTLE GEMS AND RADISHES W I T H R I C O T TA S A L ATA A N D S E E D S ACTIVE TIME 10 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 1 0 MINUTES SERVES 10
1 tsp. lemon zest and 1 Tbsp. lemon juice with 1/3 cup olive oil; season with 1/2 tsp. each kosher salt and black pepper. Add 3 heads quartered Little Gem lettuce and 2½ cups mixed sliced radishes and toss to coat. Top with 3 oz. shaved ricotta salata cheese, 1/4 cup roasted salted sunflower seeds, 2 Tbsp. each poppy seeds and toasted sesame seeds, and 2 tsp. flaky sea salt. Drizzle with oil. WHISK
MEANWHILE, heat 1 tablespoon oil in a large pot over mediumhigh. Add couscous and cook, stirring occasionally, until golden, 3 to 4 minutes. Add 2 cups water and 1/2 teaspoon salt. Bring to a simmer and cook, covered, until water is absorbed, 5 to 7 minutes. Fluff with a fork and spread out on a baking sheet; let cool for 15 minutes.
onions, couscous, and corn in a bowl. (Refrigerate, covered, up to 1 day in advance.) TOSS
before serving, add basil, chives, dill, vinegar, pepper, and remaining 1/3 cup oil and 2 teaspoons salt and toss to combine. JUST
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butter and 1 tablespoon oil in a large pot over mediumhigh until butter melts. Add shallots and 1/2 teaspoon salt; cook, stirring often, until shallots are soft and golden, about 2 minutes. Add garlic and bay leaves; cook, stirring often, until garlic is golden, about 2 minutes. Add wine and simmer for 30 seconds. Add 3 cups tomatoes and cook, stirring, until soft, about 4 minutes. Add clams and mussels and cook, covered, until clams and mussels fully open, 4 to 6 minutes. Remove clams and mussels with tongs as they open and transfer to a bowl (discard any that don’t open). HEAT
MUSSELS AND CL AMS W I T H T O M AT O E S A N D TA R R A G O N ACTIVE TIME 30 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 3 0 MINUTES SERVES 6
4 Tbsp. unsalted butter 3 Tbsp. olive oil, divided 5 shallots, thinly sliced 1 tsp. kosher salt, divided 5 cloves garlic, thinly sliced 2 bay leaves 1/2 cup dry white wine 2 lb. tomatoes, chopped, divided 2 lb. littleneck clams, scrubbed 2 lb. mussels, scrubbed and debearded 1 Tbsp. chopped fresh tarragon 1/4 tsp. black pepper Crusty bread, grilled or toasted, for serving Lemon wedges, for serving
toss tarragon with pepper and remaining 1 cup tomatoes, 2 tablespoons oil, and 1/2 teaspoon salt. MEANWHILE,
clams and mussels to pot and reheat until warm. Top with tomato mixture and serve with bread and lemons. RETURN
N E C TA R I N E O L I V E OIL CAKE ACTIVE TIME 20 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 2 HOURS SERVES 8
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour 1/2 tsp. kosher salt 1/2 tsp. baking powder 1/2 tsp. baking soda 4 ripe nectarines 3/4 cup granulated sugar, plus more for pan 2 large eggs 1 tsp. vanilla extract 3/4 cup olive oil, divided, plus more for pan and drizzling Powdered sugar, for serving 1 tsp. flaky sea salt
oven to 350°F. Brush a 9-inch round cake pan with oil and line bottom with parchment paper; brush with oil and sprinkle with granulated sugar. PREHEAT
WHISK flour, salt, baking powder, and baking soda in a large bowl.
and roughly chop 2 nectarines. Puree in a blender or food processor until smooth. PIT
WHISK granulated sugar, eggs, and vanilla in a large bowl. Whisking constantly, gradually add 1/2 cup oil. Add flour mixture in 2 batches, whisking until evenly incorporated. (Batter will be thick.) Fold in nectarine puree and pour batter into prepared pan. BAKE until cake is golden and pulls away from sides of pan, 28 to 30 minutes. Let cool in pan for 10 minutes. Remove cake from pan and transfer to a rack to cool completely. (Cake can be made up to 2 days in advance. Wrap tightly and store at room temperature.)
dust cake with powdered sugar. Slice remaining 2 nectarines and toss with flaky salt and remaining 1/4 cup oil. Serve cake with nectarines and a drizzle of oil. TO SERVE,
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T H E R E ’ S A S P E C I A L P L E A S U R E I N H AV I N G P E O P L E O V E R T H AT N O N I G H T O N T H E T O W N C A N M AT C H . BY JESSICA FR ANCIS KANE
and perfect Instagram feeds, it can feel easier to meet on neutral ground—a favorite restaurant where you know the food is good and you don’t have to hide the laundry. But there are lovely aspects to entertaining in the home that we’re losing if this is the only way we meet. The greatest host I’ve ever known served, as an appetizer, marmalade poured over a block of cream cheese, crackers on the side. She’d prepare this right at the table, while she told you something interesting about the person to your left. She was a friend of my grandmother’s—we called her Aunt Patty— I N T H I S AG E O F B U S Y L I V E S
and though her cooking was far from perfect, her willingness to bring people together was legendary. She’d combine friends, family, and friends of friends and family, convinced the act of gathering was enough to bridge any fault lines. If conversation stalled, she always had a local petition in her bag that would get everyone talking again. She told me she didn’t like gathering at restaurants because she didn’t want everyone “fussing with menus.” She wanted people to focus on each other, and they did this more naturally when they were all eating the same thing. Aunt Patty usually told you where to sit, but this is not essential. I was impressed once by a friend who spontaneously invited a group of writers to her house for dinner. We helped ourselves to bowls of salad and a quickly made stew and perched wherever we could. It felt like a typical night in her life that she happened to invite us into. A few years ago, when I wanted to invite my editor for dinner, I looked around my apartment and despaired. We had a hole in our kitchen ceiling and too few chairs. I wasn’t sure when I’d last dusted. I almost picked a restaurant, and then I remembered Aunt Patty and the menus. I recalled some advice from Life Is Meals by James and Kay Salter: “Tidy the bathroom guests will use, clear clutter, and let it go at that. Devote yourself instead to the elements that will actually be memorable: the food and the conversation.” I followed those rules, did not one thing more, and the night was a success. The food was memorable, though not for the right reasons (we dubbed a failed gluten-free pumpkin bread “pumpkin surprise”). But more important, we were cozy, and everyone, even the kids, stayed late talking around the table. So have courage! There’s value in sharing your home as it is, not as you would shape it toward some ideal. Your guests will go home with not just the memory of a meal but the sense of a life. JESSICA FRANCIS KANE IS THE AUTHOR OF RULES FOR VISITING. SHE LIVES IN NEW YORK CITY.
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The one with two favorites.
Try them all! REESE’S and REESE’S PIECES trademarks and trade dress and the orange color and crown design are used under license. OREO, the OREO Wafer Design and CHIPS AHOY! are registered trademarks of Mondeléz International group, used under license. HEATH trademark and trade dress are used under license. SNICKERS® and M&M’S® are trademarks of Mars or Affiliates, used under license.
J U LY
F O O D S T Y L I N G B Y C H E L S E A Z I M M E R ; P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y C H R I S T I N E K E E LY
High summer calls for easy cooking and even easier eating. Get grill-ready with a big batch of all-purpose spice rub (page 126), perfect on everything from ribs to fish. For a change of pace, throw a cauliflower steak over the hot coals (page 119), or catch island vibes with sticky chicken thighs and pineapple (page 124). Good-for-you raspberry-chia jam (page 128) makes breakfast a no-brainer. It’s delicious spread on toast or swirled into overnight oats. Because this is the best time of all to keep it simple.
Photograph by Victor Protasio
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FOOD
Easy Dinner 1
Steak-and-potato skewers with orange salsa ACTIVE TIME 30 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 30 MINUTES SERVES 4
✓ Quick Cooking ✓ Gluten-Free ✓ Family Friendly
1 lb. hanger steak, cut into 1 1/2-in. pieces 2 tsp. chili powder 1 tsp. ground cumin 5 Tbsp. olive oil, divided, plus more for grill grates 1 3/4 tsp. kosher salt, divided 3 bell peppers, quartered lengthwise and seeded 1 red onion, sliced crosswise into 3/4-in.-thick rings 2 oranges, segmented 2 scallions, thinly sliced 3 Tbsp. chopped fresh cilantro 2 Tbsp. red wine vinegar 1 Fresno chile, seeded and finely chopped 8 8-inch wooden skewers in water for 15 minutes. SOAK
potatoes in a microwavesafe bowl; cover tightly with plastic wrap and cut a small slit in top. Microwave on high until potatoes are just tender, about 7 minutes. Let cool slightly. PLACE
potatoes and steak with chili powder, cumin, 2 tablespoons oil, and 1 teaspoon salt in a bowl until evenly coated. Thread potatoes and steak alternately onto each skewer. TOSS
grill to high (450°F to 500°F). Lightly coat grates with oil. Toss bell peppers and onion with 1 tablespoon oil and 1/2 teaspoon salt. Grill bell peppers, onion, and skewers, uncovered, turning occasionally, until vegetables are charred and slightly softened and steak is cooked to desired doneness, 10 to 12 minutes for medium-rare. Remove from grill. PREHEAT
stir together oranges, scallions, cilantro, vinegar, chile, and remaining 2 tablespoons oil and 1/4 teaspoon salt in a small bowl. Serve skewers and vegetables with orange salsa. MEANWHILE,
PER SERVING: 501 CALORIES, 28G FAT (6G SAT.), 78MG CHOL., 6G FIBER, 30G PRO., 34G CARB., 960MG SOD., 11G SUGAR
Recipes by Robin Bashinsky 118
Photographs by Victor Protasio
F O O D S T Y L I N G B Y C H E L S E A Z I M M E R ; P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y C H R I S T I N E K E E LY
1 lb. baby potatoes (about 16)
Easy Dinner 2
Grilled cauliflower steaks with romesco and Manchego
1 12-oz. jar roasted red peppers, drained 1/4 cup almond butter 2 1/2 Tbsp. sherry vinegar 7 Tbsp. olive oil, divided
ACTIVE TIME 25 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 30 MINUTES SERVES 4
1 1/2 tsp. kosher salt, divided
✓ Quick Cooking ✓ Vegetarian ✓ Gluten-Free
1 large head cauliflower 1/2 tsp. freshly ground black pepper 1 15.5-oz. can chickpeas, drained and rinsed 4 cups baby arugula 3 radishes, thinly sliced 1 Tbsp. fresh lemon juice (from 1 lemon) 2 oz. Manchego cheese, shaved (about 1 1/4 cups) 1/3 cup chopped roasted almonds red peppers, almond butter, vinegar, 4 tablespoons oil, and 1/2 teaspoon salt in a blender, scraping down sides as needed, until smooth, about 1 minute. PROCESS
grill to medium-high (400°F to 450°F). Cut cauliflower lengthwise into 4 “steaks” (3/4 inch thick), leaving stem intact. Brush cauliflower with 2 tablespoons oil; season with black pepper and remaining 1 teaspoon salt. Grill cauliflower, covered, turning occasionally, until stem is tender when pierced with a knife, 12 to 14 minutes. PREHEAT
toss chickpeas, arugula, radishes, lemon juice, and remaining 1 tablespoon oil in a bowl. Divide red pepper sauce among plates. Top with cauliflower steaks, salad, cheese, and almonds.
MEANWHILE,
PER SERVING: 641 CALORIES, 46G FAT (9G SAT.), 9MG CHOL., 16G FIBER, 19G PRO., 43G CARB., 1,339MG SOD., 9G SUGAR
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FOOD
3 cups thinly sliced red cabbage (from 1 head) 1 cup matchstick carrots 3 scallions, thinly sliced
Easy Dinner 3
BBQ shrimp tacos ACTIVE TIME 25 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 25 MINUTES SERVES 4
✓ Quick Cooking ✓ Gluten-Free ✓ Family Friendly
1 jalapeño, seeded and finely chopped (optional) 3/4 tsp. kosher salt
cabbage, carrots, scallions, jalapeño (if using), salt, and 2 tablespoons lime juice in a large bowl. Stir together sour cream, cilantro, and remaining 2 tablespoons lime juice in a small bowl. TOSS
2 Tbsp. Worcestershire sauce
butter in a large skillet over high until foamy. Add shrimp and cook, stirring occasionally, until shrimp turn slightly orange, about 2 minutes. Add Worcestershire sauce and Creole seasoning and cook, stirring occasionally, until shrimp are just cooked through, 2 to 3 minutes.
1 tsp. Creole seasoning
DIVIDE
4 Tbsp. fresh lime juice (from 2 large limes), divided 1/2 cup sour cream 1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro 2 Tbsp. unsalted butter 1 lb. peeled, deveined large raw shrimp
8 6-in. corn tortillas, warmed Lime wedges, for serving
MELT
shrimp among warm tortillas and top with slaw and sour cream mixture. Serve with lime wedges. PER SERVING: 343 CALORIES, 13G FAT (6G SAT.), 212MG CHOL., 5G FIBER, 27G PRO., 33G CARB., 794MG SOD., 6G SUGAR
1 2 0 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
MAKE DINNER SOMETHING MEMORABLE.
FOOD
4 large eggs 1 shallot, finely chopped
Easy Dinner 4
Lemony craband-squash salad ACTIVE TIME 30 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 30 MINUTES SERVES 4
✓ Quick Cooking ✓ Make Ahead ✓ Gluten-Free
3 Tbsp. fresh lemon juice (from 1 lemon) 1 Tbsp. chopped fresh thyme 2 tsp. Dijon mustard 1 tsp. kosher salt 3/4 tsp. freshly ground black pepper 3 Tbsp. olive oil 5 cups loosely packed baby kale or baby lettuce 1/2 head radicchio, thinly sliced 1 lb. fresh jumbo lump crabmeat, drained and picked over for shells 2 cups halved grape tomatoes 2 yellow squash, chopped 1/4 cup chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley
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a pot of water to a boil over high. Carefully lower eggs into water and cook for 7 minutes. Using a slotted spoon, transfer eggs to a bowl of ice water. Let cool for 10 minutes. Peel eggs and halve lengthwise. BRING
shallot, lemon juice, thyme, mustard, salt, and pepper in a small bowl. Whisk in oil until combined. WHISK
kale, radicchio, and 2 tablespoons dressing in a large bowl. Mix crabmeat, tomatoes, squash, parsley, and remaining dressing in a separate large bowl. TOSS
kale mixture topped with crab salad and eggs. SERVE
PER SERVING: 310 CALORIES, 16G FAT (3G SAT.), 296MG CHOL., 3G FIBER, 30G PRO., 11G CARB., 1,083MG SOD., 6G SUGAR
CO OK WITH COZI Get Real Simple’s easy weeknight-dinner recipes in Cozi, a free meal-planning and organizing app from Meredith Corporation (available on iTunes and Google Play).
. e m e Bi t
Easy Dinner 5
Glazed chicken and pineapple ACTIVE TIME 30 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 30 MINUTES SERVES 4
✓ Quick Cooking ✓ Gluten-Free ✓ Family Friendly
1/4 cup canned pineapple juice 1/4 cup tamari or soy sauce 1/4 cup ketchup 1/4 cup honey 2 Tbsp. mirin 4 6- to 8-oz. bone-in skin-on chicken thighs 1 jalapeño, chopped (optional) 4 cloves garlic, chopped Cooking spray, for grill grates 4 1-in.-thick rings fresh pineapple (from 1 peeled and cored pineapple) 1/2 tsp. kosher salt 3 scallions, thinly sliced 2 tsp. toasted sesame seeds Steamed rice, for serving together pineapple juice, tamari, ketchup, honey, and mirin in a small bowl. Place chicken thighs in a large bowl; add jalapeño (if using), garlic, and half the pineapple sauce and toss to coat. Reserve remaining pineapple sauce for serving. Let chicken marinate for 5 minutes. STIR
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preheat grill to medium-high (400°F to 450°F). Lightly coat grates with cooking spray. Grill pineapple, uncovered, flipping once, until grill marks appear, about 2 minutes per side. Cut each ring in half. MEANWHILE,
grill heat to medium (350°F to 400°F). Lightly coat grates with cooking spray. Remove chicken from marinade (reserving marinade) and season with salt. Add chicken to grill, skin side down. Grill, turning often and basting with reserved marinade, until a thermometer inserted in thickest portion of thighs registers 165°F, about 20 minutes. (Discard any remaining marinade.) REDUCE
chicken with scallions, sesame seeds, and reserved pineapple sauce. Serve with grilled pineapple and rice. TOP
PER SERVING: 723 CALORIES, 34G FAT (9G SAT.), 194MG CHOL., 2G FIBER, 37G PRO., 64G CARB., 1,136MG SOD., 31G SUGAR (17G ADDED SUGAR)
THIS IS BIG.
MADE WITH ORGANIC CHICKEN AND SIMPLE INGREDIENTS. NOW IN A FREEZER AISLE NEAR YOU.
VISIT PERDUE.COM FOR SPECIAL OFFERS AND TO LEARN MORE.
FOOD
Big Batch C O O K O N C E A N D E AT A L L W E E K . GET GRILLING WITH OUR A L L- P U R P O S E S P I C E R U B. By D awn Perr y
ACTIVE TIME 5 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 5 MINUTES MAKES 1 CUP
1/4 cup sweet paprika 1/4 cup plus 2 tsp. kosher salt 2 Tbsp. light brown sugar 4 tsp. garlic powder 4 tsp. onion powder 4 tsp. dried oregano 4 tsp. orange zest (from 1 orange) 2 tsp. black pepper 1 tsp. cayenne (optional) paprika, salt, sugar, garlic powder, onion powder, oregano, orange zest, pepper, and cayenne, if using, in a medium bowl. Use your fingers to rub sugar and zest evenly through dried spices. Store in an airtight container at room temperature for up to 1 month.
F O O D S T Y L I N G B Y C H E L S E A Z I M M E R ; P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y C H R I S T I N E K E E LY
COMBINE
Rub chicken, pork, steak, or fish with olive oil, and then season with 1 tablespoon rub for every 1 pound of meat, poultry, or fish. Let stand for 10 minutes before grilling. HOW TO USE:
Maintain a well-stocked spice cabinet with the guide at realsimple.com/spices.
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Photograph by Victor Protasio
BRIGHT OFFERS
EVENTS
FINDS
IDEAS
GIVEAWAYS
FOOD
Better for You FA S T, H E A LT H Y, A N D F U L L O F F L AVO R . T H I S M O N T H : R A S P B E R RY- C H I A J A M By Ananda Eidelstein
ACTIVE TIME 15 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 1 HOUR MAKES ABOUT 2 CUPS
1 lb. fresh raspberries 1/4 tsp. kosher salt 4 tsp. chia seeds 1 Tbsp. honey 1 tsp. fresh lemon juice (from 1 lemon)
F O O D S T Y L I N G B Y C H E L S E A Z I M M E R ; P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y C H R I S T I N E K E E LY
PLACE raspberries, 1/4 cup water, and salt in a medium pot. Cover and bring to a simmer over medium-high. Reduce heat to medium and simmer until raspberries begin to burst, about 5 minutes. Uncover and continue to cook, stirring often and mashing gently, until mixture thickens, 8 to 10 minutes. Remove from heat and stir in chia seeds, honey, and lemon juice. Let cool completely.
to a container with a lid and refrigerate for up to 1 week. (Jam will continue to thicken as it chills.) TRANSFER
The tastiest jam deserves the most delicious nut butter. See how to make it at home—yes, really—at realsimple.com/pbj.
1 2 8 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
Photograph by Victor Protasio
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Fo r Fu n
12 Sunscreen Innovations I’d Like to See By Shannon Reed
An attachment installed on my front door that sprays a thin layer of SPF 100 sunscreen as I exit yet gets nothing on my swimsuit or cover-up.
An Iron Man costume that is actually sunscreen and melts into a child’s skin within minutes.
Three words: sunscreen. ice. cubes. Seven more words: apply. to. the. back. of. my. neck.
Sunscreen that smells great and depuffs eye bags and treats fine lines and knows what to make with those chicken breasts in the freezer.
Adorable, trained dogs who appear every two hours with a bottle of sunscreen around their necks, Saint Bernard–style, to remind me to reapply.
Sunscreen for lawn work: It repels grass clippings, doesn’t flake off when you’re gardening, and somehow makes you invisible to your overly chatty neighbor.
Sunscreen that matches the skin tone of every user so my diverse family does not need 25 bottles on our beach trip.
Edible sunscreen. Also functions as a decent base for ranch dressing.
A permanent buy-oneget-one-free promotion at all stores for people who can prove they’re at least 50 percent Irish.
A texting service that sends me a short video of Chris Pine shooting finger guns and winking every time I reapply.
A plunge pool, but for sunscreen. Kids get 15 minutes of screen time when they use it.
SPF 5,000: It’s actually just a blanket and an air-conditioned cottage.
1 3 0 R E A L S I M P L E J U LY 2 0 1 9
Illustrations by Joel Holland
Delicious Shreds made with real meat or fish Explore over 60 different wet varieties at Friskies.com/Wet
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Shred Your Cat’s Expectations!
Delta® DelucaTM Single-Handlle Pull-Down Sprayer Kitchen Faucet in Stainless.
THE FRESHEST THING IN THIS KITCHEN? THE FAUCET. ®
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The innovative spray wand on the new Delta Deluca pull-down faucet has three distinct, powerful settings. It’s attached to a 20-inch, fl exible hose. It even comes with a convenient soap dispenser. See what happens when ideas flow? Today is the day for doing.