RS - November 2019 by Lawrence Ambrocio

GET AHEAD ON GIFT GIVING

Holiday Shortcuts & Recipes Secrets to a Cleaner Home in Less Time Side Dish Stars Health Skills That Could Save Your Life

NOVEMBER 2019

TAKE YOUR LASHES TO PARADISE BECAUSE YOU’RE WORTH IT.TM

ELLE FANNING

SIMULATION OF ACTUAL PRODUCT RESULTS ON LASHES ENHANCED WITH LASH INSERTS

LASH PARADISE 1. PRIMER

TO THICKEN LASHES & HELP ENHANCE WEAR

2. MASCARA

FOR VOLUPTUOUS VOLUME & INTENSE LENGTH

FO O D ST Y L I N G BY R E B EC CA J U R K E V I C H ; P R O P ST Y L I N G BY G L E N P R O E BST E L

Thoughts

“We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie.” — D AV I D M A M E T, B o s t o n M a r r i a g e

2 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Photograph by Johnny Miller

E d i t o r ’s N o t e

NEW

I came across a photo of my late grandfather in his Marines uniform and recalled stories my mom told about all the countries he served in during World War II. Then I thought about all the family dinners we’d shared over the years and how I’d never managed to ask him about any of it. At another gathering, I looked at the teenagers around the table, who weren’t saying much, and wondered how I could learn more about their lives. Even with people you know well, it can be hard to find that conversational spark that leads to new insights. This year, I’ve vowed to skip the same old questions about school and work and use a tip from our article on coaxing stories out of people (page 82): Ask them how something works. After all, everybody likes to share their expertise, whether it’s making pavlova or setting up a sound bar. Because while Real Simple again brings you useful strategies and recipes, we also focus on the most important part of the holidays: people. This month, you’ll get readers’ tips for the happiest family gatherings (page 16) and learn how to feel at ease in any social situation (page 67). If these are things you’ve already mastered, congratulations! Move on to the recipes, and do not miss the secret to delicious mashed potatoes (page 108). However you celebrate, we hope it’s enjoyable and memorable.

FIND YOUR

SHADE AT

& TRY IT ON

VIRTUALLY OR

SCAN NOW

Follow me on Twitter @lyazel and Instagram @leslieyazel

GarnierUSA.com

4 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Photograph by Remi Pyrdol

W A R D R O B E S T Y L I N G B Y A LY S S A D I N E E N ; H A I R A N D M A K E U P B Y S U M M E R T R A N

T A FA M I LY G AT H E R I N G ,

NO AMMONIA. IT'S IN THE OILS.

GarnierUSA.com

Permanent Hair Color. 100% Gray Coverage.

Contents November 2019

O N T H E C OV E R

Gold Grid Napkin, $75 for 4; minna-goods.com. Vintage Lugged Bennington Potters Bowl; etsy.com. Blue Serving Bowl, $175; henrystreet studio.com. Oval Ceramic Platter, from $240; clamlab.com for similar. Similar to shown: Linen Table Runner, from $58; food52.com. Flared Bowl in Citrus, $126 (large); us.mudaustralia .com. Pinch Bowl, $19; westelm.com. TO BUY:

Holiday Shortcuts and Recipes 37, 104, 112 Secrets to a Cleaner Home in Less Time

42 104

Side Dish Stars Health Skills That Could Save Your Life

Get Ahead on Gift Giving

118

Freshen up your beauty look for autumn

112

124

10 4

Set a gorgeous table using everyday plates

The story of two lifelong friends

Tricks for tastier turkey (and the works)

Cover Photograph by Anna Williams Food St yling by Chris Lanier

Prop St yling by Sarah Smar t

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

Am I Ready? WHAT YOU CAN DO NOW TO PREP FOR YOUR FUTURE HERE ARE 3 WAYS TO ENSURE YOU’LL BE BOTH PHYSICALLY AND FINANCIALLY HEALTHY AS YOU ENTER—AND ENJOY—THE NEXT CHAPTER. As just about everyone in their 50s and 60s can attest, those two decades are marked by changes that could dramatically impact the years that follow. Some of those changes may be physical in nature, while others are ﬁnancial. The good news is that there are concrete steps you can take now to set yourself up for success later in life, no matter what your future plans.

Eat and move with purpose. Your body will undergo major changes throughout your 50s and 60s, including bone and muscle loss. Fortunately, you can help counteract this process with a good diet and regular exercise. Support bone health with calcium-rich foods like yogurt, beans and kale, and weightbearing exercises that require you to work against gravity—think hiking, jogging or tennis. To maintain muscle, eat lean proteins (halibut and chicken breast are two great sources) and focus on resistance exercises like swimming and biking.

Get smart about Medicare. Medicare provides health care coverage for Americans 65 and older, among others. If you are aging into Medicare, your Initial Enrollment Period is based on the month in which you turn 65. It begins three months before your birth month and extends until three months after your birth month. Explore the different types of Medicare plans offered by Blue Cross and Blue Shield companies and ﬁnd coverage that ﬁts your healthcare needs

Supercharge your savings. For many people, earnings peak during their 50s. If you’re among them, use the opportunity to fortify your future ﬁnances and max out retirement account contributions. Once you’re 50, you can stash even more in those accounts thanks to catch-up contribution rules. Also, consider downsizing early—after all, do you really still need a house after the kids have left the nest?

Scan the QR code to visit BENEFITOFBLUE.COM EXPLORE THE DIFFERENT TYPES OF MEDICARE PLANS OFFERED BY BLUE CROSS AND BLUE SHIELD COMPANIES AT BENEFITOFBLUE.COM BCBS companies are independent licensees of the Blue Cross Blue Shield Association (BCBSA). The Real Simple name is a trademark owned by Meredith Corporation and in no way affiliated with BCBSA. Please consult with your healthcare team before starting a new ﬁtness or diet program.

BROUGHT TO YOU BY BLUE CROSS AND BLUE SHIELD COMPANIES

Having a plan, no matter what your plans are.

That’s the Benefit of Blue.SM

Discover Medicare options that fit your budget and lifestyle. BenefitOfBlue.com

Blue Cross Blue Shield Companies are independent licensees of the Blue Cross Blue Shield Association

Contents

Sweet gifts for early shoppers

Delicate jewelry you can wear anywhere

Holiday cleanup, managed

Thoughts

Editor’s Note

Real Simple 24 /7

Your Words

The Short List

what we love Personalized Gifts

Pretty Smart Beauty buys to simplify your routine 25 The Staple Popcorn

Little Helpers Clever items that make every day better 30 Room Rx How high should a new backsplash go?

the realist A DIY Fix for Shiny Floors (and It Smells Amazing)

Everyday Treasures Tiny trinkets for a glimmering winter 58

Cooking School Store—then transform!— your Thanksgiving leftovers 37 Now What?!? Solutions for life’s mini disasters

Company’s Coming! Clean Up Fast Tidy just a few rooms or do the whole house 42 Drugstore Insider The best beauty products, handpicked by a pro 50 Road Test At-home spa Real Simplifier Sell your stuff online

52 54

Organize This Declutter and store your important papers 56

Closet Care Keep your cashmere sweaters like new 64

relating Feel at Ease in Every Seasonal Situation Only know the host? Have to give a toast? Do this 67 The Power of a Book Melissa Hart on the Little Free Library that changed everything 72 Pet Tricks TLC for your aging pet 76 Modern Manners Catherine Newman offers advice 5 Ways to Pull Great Stories Out of Your Family Move past the same old small talk and connect

balance The Complete Guide to Tipping From the definitely-tip to the do-not-tip 87 Making It Work What’s your biggest childcare challenge, and how do you tackle it? 94 6 Health Skills You’ll Be Glad to Have Recognize common emergencies and be ready for action 97 Ahhh Take a breather

103

features Thanksgiving Secrets Every Cook Should Know Classic holiday recipes that just work 104

Something New for Fall Easy, wearable makeup swaps worth trying 118 Friends for Life Ann Patchett on the beauty of a five-decade female friendship 124

food 5 Easy Dinners

132

Better for You Sweet potato polenta

138

Big Batch Pigs in a blanket

140

Road Test Fall flavors

142

for fun How Should I Spend My Saturday? 146

White Plate Special Holiday-table flair you can create with your daily dishes 112

REAL SIMPLE (ISSN 1528-1701) (NOVEMBER 2019) (VOLUME 20/ISSUE 11) IS PUBLISHED MONTHLY BY TI GOTHAM INC. TI GOTHAM INC. IS A WHOLLY OWNED SUBSIDIARY OF MEREDITH CORPORATION. PRINCIPAL OFFICE: 225 LIBERTY ST., NEW YORK, NY 10281-1008. PERIODICALS POSTAGE PAID AT NEW YORK, NY, AND ADDITIONAL MAILING OFFICES. POSTMASTER: SEND ALL UAA TO CFS (SEE DMM 507.1.5.2); NONPOSTAL AND MILITARY FACILITIES: SEND ADDRESS CORRECTIONS TO REAL SIMPLE MAGAZINE, PO BOX 37508, BOONE, IA 50037-0508. CANADA POST PUBLICATIONS MAIL AGREEMENT #40069223. BN# 13200211RT001. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. PRINTED IN THE U.S.A. CUSTOMER SERVICE AND SUBSCRIPTIONS: FOR 24/7 SERVICE, PLEASE USE OUR WEBSITE: REALSIMPLE.COM/MYACCOUNT. YOU CAN ALSO CALL 1-800-881-1172 OR WRITE REAL SIMPLE, PO BOX 37508, BOONE, IA 50037-0508. REPRODUCTION IN WHOLE OR IN PART WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED. YOUR BANK MAY PROVIDE UPDATES TO THE CARD INFORMATION WE HAVE ON FILE. YOU MAY OPT OUT OF THIS SERVICE AT ANY TIME. FOR SYNDICATION OR INTERNATIONAL LICENSING REQUESTS OR REPRINT AND REUSE PERMISSION, EMAIL SYNDICATION@MEREDITH.COM.

12 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

NEXT LEADING BRAND

LEAKGUARDTM BRAID

MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE Itʼs time to ditch the leaks. And get the protection of our LeakGuard BraidTM.

Real Simple 24/7 FOLLOW US ONLINE FOR E XCLUSIVE IDE A S, TIP S, A N D W AY S T O M A K E L I F E E A S I E R — E V E RY D AY.

MEET

L AW R E N C E WHRITENOUR

H O L I DAY S A L E S 1 0 1

DEPUT Y PHOTO EDITOR AT R E A L S I M P L E

Now that gift-giving season is gearing up, learn how to snag the best deals on Black Friday, Cyber Monday, and beyond.

Most memorable trip: A vacation in Greece, complete with gorgeous views and great food.

Read the insider tips at realsimple.com/ shoppingdeals.

Favorite item in my home: All my plants!

@LWRNCJMSW ON INSTAGRAM

An illustrated guide to cooking a crowd-pleasing turkey Our handy turkey-cooking guide details how to prepare the perfect bird every single time. Hone your skills at realsimple.com/turkey.

# R S H O L I D AY ’Tis the season for Instagram inspiration, so we’re sharing holiday hacks and recipes with our #rsholiday hashtag. Tag us in your photos and you may just get the gift of a regram.

Healthy side dishes P I N T E R E ST @REALSIMPLE

These delicious Thanksgiving sides will steal the show at your next family feast. Get the recipes at realsimple.com/healthysides. Open

14 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

and tap

for Thanksgiving recipes.

TWITTER @REALSIMPLE

FAC E B O O K @REALSIMPLE

S N A P C H AT @ R E A L S I M P L E M AG

I N STAG R A M @ R E A L _S I M P L E

C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P L E F T: R E M I P Y R D O L ; G R E G D U P R E E ; A S I A P I E T R Z Y K ; G R E G D U P R E E ( 2 )

Go-to recipe: My mom’s chocolate chip cookies. I love to honor her memory by baking them when I miss her.

Yo u r W o r d s

What’s the secret to a happy family gathering?

Let everyone help! Everyone wants to contribute, and it really takes a lot of stress off you as host. A N N LO N G, E U R E K A S P R I N G S, ARK ANSAS

An empty dishwasher and trash can before the gathering begins.

“ EV E RY T H I N G O N H E R E I S F RO M T H R I F T I N G, U N D E R $ 4, O R F R E E ! ” @J E N N A PA R R

ELISA DENICHOLAS, LAVALLETTE, NEW JERSEY

JENNIFER CARLTON ENGELHARDT

The secret to a happy family gathering for my family is playing games together, especially board games. JILL POSKIN, NAPERVILLE, ILLINOIS

# R S L OV E

In our family, the secret is very simple: lots of food and drink, and no discussions about politics or religion.

We have a cellphone bucket at the front door. When we have family over for dinner, everyone puts their phone in the bucket on silent. HEATHER BROWN SHARPE

Be organized and prepare your meals in advance so you can spend quality time with your family. @MAUIDIANN

Make it inclusive. Invite everyone and be sure all feel welcome. At this time, our country feels more divided than I can ever remember, so though some family members might not agree with everyone’s life choices, we must all respect the right for each individual to make those choices.

Parents not looking at how many treats the children are sneaking away with! @AMONGALLOFTHIS

Our most wonderful family gathering yet was a simple ice cream sundae bar for dinner. Everyone brought a few of their favorite toppings to sample. The kids loved it, and cleanup was simple. KELLY DAVIS, LANCASTER, PENNSYLVANIA

CATHERINE FOWLER, LACEY, WASHINGTON

Background music and letting go of expectations. @ K AY L A _ D _ J O N E S

16 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

We have a saying in our family: “If there’s pumpkin pie in the house, it shall be had for breakfast!” Every year on the morning after Thanksgiving, our family of seven piles onto one bed and eats leftover pumpkin pie. The kids are all grown now, and we still look forward to this tradition every year.

A potluck, so everyone feels like a contributor and knows there will be something they like. CAROLE WHITCOMB, BURLINGTON, IOWA

My secret to a happy family gathering is planning the type of meal and asking family members what they would like to bring, well in advance. LAURIE STAALBERG, TEMPE, ARIZONA

BARBARA HARMS

Just nod and smile. DEBORAH GERHART, TUCSON, ARIZONA

Have a code (“Look! A dolphin!”) when the conversation drifts to a controversial topic. JENNY SUMMERS, HICKORY, NORTH CAROLINA

I always send an invitation, not an expectation. All are welcome, but also busy. WENDY WILSON, CANTON, MISSOURI

The Instagrammers who shared the photos on these pages will receive our new Holiday Calm special edition. Want to be considered for this column? Tag photos on Instagram with #rslove.

Creating space for people to have alone time between all the togetherness is key. This could be a nice walk outdoors to help digest dinner or a brief nap. JENNY PIEZAS, CRANFORD, NEW JERSEY

A champagne toast. Once the family settles into a clean home with welcoming guest rooms, it’s time to savor a bottle of champagne. Kids get sparkling grape juice, each couple gets matching flutes, and we set the tone for a celebratory time.

“ F R I E N DS D O N ’ T L E T F R I E N DS S ’ M O R E A LO N E .” @J _ P I E T T E

# R S L OV E

NEXT Q U E S T I O N ... What song do you always turn to for comfort, and why?

BIRGIT SACHER, SANTA ROSA, CALIFORNIA

Send an email to yourwords@ realsimple.com and let us know your answer to this question. Your response could appear on these pages.

We joyfully tell and retell our stories to maintain the connection between siblings and have the younger generations understand how we became who we are, where we came from, and potentially where we’ll go. LESLEY MOLLNER, RIO RANCHO, NEW MEXICO

A start time and end time with an open-house policy. For example, “Come by anytime between 3 p.m. and 8 p.m. Stay as long or as briefly as you like. No pressure.” @MY TR AVELDIARY_BYHA ZEL

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

The Short List F I V E B O O K S T H AT W O N ’ T D I S A P P O I N T By Elizabeth Sile

Great for book club In 1925, former slave Josephine owns a thriving farm. But a friendship with a white neighbor threatens all she’s built. In 2017, her descendant, single mom Ava, moves in with her white grandmother, who starts to turn on her. Margaret Wilkerson Sexton’s The Revisioners is a stunning, necessary novel about racism, family history, and survival.

Good argument

Deep dive To raise a healthy eater, all you’ve got to do is feed your kid a balanced diet and get some veggies in, right? It’s not so simple, writes Bettina Elias Siegel in Kid Food. In expert detail, the writer, activist, and parent highlights the many ways children’s eating habits are influenced by outside forces—from the halls of Congress to the offices of ad agencies. A compelling, informative read for any parent.

Immersive debut

Lyrical family story Young-adult and fantasy author Daniel José Older blends magical realism, mystery, and a bit of his own family history in his first adult novel, The Book of Lost Saints. During the Cuban Revolution, Marisol disappears. Later, as a spirit, she haunts her nephew through his dreams, prompting him to look for the truth about what happened to her. It’s a beautiful, heartbreaking tale.

In Shannon Pufahl’s atmospheric novel, On Swift Horses, a woman and her brother-in-law crave freedom in the 1950s American West. Restless Muriel secretly bets on horses and keeps her winnings from her husband. Itinerant, closeted Julius searches for his lover in Las Vegas and Tijuana. With satisfyingly slow prose, Pufahl explores identity and paths not taken.

P R O P ST Y L I N G BY M EG A N H E D G P E T H

For more book recommendations, visit realsimple.com/ newbooks.

For the conflict-averse, arguing is deeply uncomfortable, frustrating, and often upsetting. Worse, in our increasingly fractious world, we’re losing the ability to productively disagree with others, writes tech entrepreneur Buster Benson in Why Are We Yelling? Benson offers helpful strategies for identifying anxieties and biases and asking questions that lead to better debate.

18 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

P h o t o g r a p h b y Te d + C h e l s e a C a v a n a u g h

The SUV for all you love. The 2020 Subaru Forester. ®

The most fuel-efficient Forester yet with standard Symmetrical All-Wheel Drive + 33 MPG.* Standard EyeSight Driver Assist Technology† helps keep you safe. Plus, you ®

can drive in confidence knowing Subaru is Kelley Blue Book’s Most Trusted Brand for five years running.**

Forester. Well-equipped at $24,495.†† Subaru, Forester, and EyeSight are registered trademarks. *EPA-estimated highway fuel economy for 2020 Subaru Forester models. Actual mileage may vary. †EyeSight is a driver-assist system that may not operate optimally under all driving conditions. The driver is always responsible for safe and attentive driving. System effectiveness depends on many factors, such as vehicle maintenance, weather, and road conditions. See your owner’s manual for complete details on system operation and limitations. **2015-2019 Kelley Blue Book Brand Image Awards are based on the Brand Watch™ study from Kelley Blue Book Strategic Insights. Award calculated among non-luxury shoppers. For more information, visit Kelley Blue Book’s KBB.com. Kelley Blue Book is a registered trademark of Kelley Blue Book Co., Inc. ††MSRP excludes destination and delivery charges, tax, title, and registration fees. Retailer sets actual price. Certain equipment may be required in specific states, which can modify your MSRP. See your retailer for details. 2020 Subaru Forester Touring shown has an MSRP of $34,595.

E V E RY T H I N G O U R E D I T O R S A R E B U Z Z I N G A B O U T T H I S M O N T H

T H E E A R LY B I R D G E T S T H E . . . S U P E R-T H O U G H T F U L PERSONALIZED GIFTS FOR E V E RY O N E O N T H E I R L I S T. T H E S E A R E A F E W O F O U R FA V O R I T E S .

P R O P ST Y L I N G BY M EG A N H E D G P E T H

By Cat Dash

TINY HOME

The sign on the front door of this mini mapleplywood log cabin can be customized with the name of your choice. Make a game out of assembling its 37 pieces, then leave it on display. TO BUY: Log Cabin Puzzle, $30; productpublic.etsy.com.

P h o t o g r a p h b y Te d + C h e l s e a C a v a n a u g h

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

W H AT W E LO V E

This handmade pottery is dishwasher safe.

1 SWEET DREAMS

Add up to three letters to these silky-soft, wrinkle-resistant jersey pj’s. TO BUY: The Cloud 9 Pajama Set, $95; summer salt.com. Use code REALSIMPLE for free monogramming. 5 R AD REPLICAS

These quirky beechwood figurines are hand-painted to resemble your family members—pets too. TO BUY: Family Figurines, from $103 for 2; myminifam.etsy.com.

22 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

3 I N I T I A L S TAT E M E N T 2 O N A RO L L

Complete your friend’s holiday-baking kit with this engraved rolling pin. Choose from multiple styles, woods, and fonts to create the perfect tool. TO BUY: Custom Rolling Pin, from $40; vermontrollingpins.com. 6 PET NAMES

Consider this well-crafted custom bowl a special treat for your fur baby. TO BUY: Dog Bowl, from $39; thelulubird.etsy.com.

Embellish these handmade ceramics with a modern monogram. Opt for 24-karat-gold script or a black-and-white combo. TO BUY: Assorted Ceramics, from $41; lux-eros.com.

An etched heart on these state-shaped ornaments can pay tribute to a hometown or meaningful destination. TO BUY: Ornament, $17; aheirloom.com.

7 TA G A L O N G

8 A F E E L- G O O D G I F T

The poppy colors and playful tassel on this soft leather tag will brighten up any jet-setter’s travel gear. TO BUY: Tassel Luggage Tag, $65; markandgraham.com.

Each purchase of a monogrammed planner or notebook funds one hour of business training for women around the world. TO BUY: Planner, $19, and Notebook, $33; mariemae.com.

4 H O M E T O W N L OV E

PJ ’ S A N D R O L L I N G P I N : B R I A N H E N N ; P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S

HOW DO YOU SAY,

“ THANKS FOR BEING MY FURRY BFF”?

ALL NATURAL

REAL CHICKEN

Stand out this season Fast Drying. No extreme heat.

Gift edition Engineered for different hair types, the Dyson Supersonic™ hair dryer makes the perfect gift for anyone on your list. Includes a Dyson-designed display stand. Engineered to neatly hold your hair dryer and its magnetic attachments.

Visit dyson.com/hairdryer

W H AT W E LO V E

Pretty Smart A O N E - A N D - D O N E S T Y L I N G S P R AY PLUS SE VEN OTHER BE AUT Y B U YS TO S I M P L I F Y YO U R RO U T I N E By Heather Muir Maffei

R+CO CENTERPIECE A L L- I N - O N E E L I X I R S P R AY

P R O P ST Y L I N G BY M EG A N H E D G P E T H

This multitasker cuts back on time and clutter. Spray it onto clean, damp hair and style. It detangles, treats, and boosts shine—all without weighing down hair. TO BUY: $32; randco.com.

P h o t o g r a p h b y Te d + Chelsea Cavanaugh

W H AT W E LO V E

Dab on the solidto-liquid oil to calm flyaways, brows, cuticles, and chapped hands, thanks to soothing botanical extracts and plant butters that also smell fantastic. TO BUY: $36; thisiscela.com. S U BT L B E AU T Y S TA C K

Instead of lugging all your makeup, create a travel-friendly stack. Choose shades of powder, highlighter, bronzer, lip and cheek tint, and concealer. The two-month supply fits in your palm. TO BUY: $12 to $14 each; subtlbeauty.com. CURÉL MOISTURE FA C I A L M I L K

An easy solution for sensitive winter skin. This lightweight lotion packs ceramides and eucalyptus extract to strengthen the skin barrier, making flakes and redness less likely. TO BUY: $30; ulta.com. L’ O R É A L PA R I S R E V I TA L I F T D E R M INTENSIVES 10% P U R E G LYC O L I C A C I D S E RU M

If you hear “acid” and turn pink, this is for you. Blended with aloe, it’s gentle enough to use every night for smoother, more even skin in three weeks. TO BUY: $30; at drugstores.

26 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

SIMPLE SKINCARE C O M P O S TA B L E CLEANSING WIPES

As convenient as traditional wipes (same thickness, softness, and waterproofmascara-removing strength) but more eco-friendly. Made of plant fibers and wood pulp, the wipes biodegrade in 42 days when composted. TO BUY: $6 for 25; at drugstores. B E AU T YC O U N T E R C O U N T E RT I M E TETR APEPTIDE SUPREME CREAM

Can’t tolerate retinol? This contains a plantbased alternative— bakuchiol. Use nightly to firm, plump, and smooth skin. TO BUY: $89; beauty counter.com. RO D I N O L I O LU S S O LUXU RY L I P & CHEEK OIL IN H E AV E N LY H O P P, B E R RY B A C I , A N D R E D H E DY

For the minimalist: a one-minute way to wake up your face. Just blend onto lips and cheeks with fingers. TO BUY: $35 each; rodinoliolusso.com.

S U B T L : B R I A N H E N N ; P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S

CÉL A ESSENTIAL BALM

TODAY’S FORECAST: 100% CHANCE OF HYDRATED SKIN. Clinically proven to lock in hydration with Hyaluronic Acid. Skin so supple and hydrated, it bounces back. neutrogena.com/hydroboost

©J&JCI 2019

W H AT W E LO V E

Quick Ideas 1 P O P C O R N PA N C A K E S

The Staple Crunchy, buttery popcorn is a no-brainer for munching, and it couldn’t be easier to make at home. All you need is a lidded pot and a bit of oil— or your favorite microwavable brand. But don’t stop there. Once you’ve popped those kernels, you can make a range of recipes, from corn pancakes and savory cheese crisps to an extra-nutty take on those rice cereal treats we all love.

Prepare batter from an 8.5-oz. package corn muffin mix; stir in 3/4 cup drained canned corn. Cook batter in 1/4 cupfuls in a buttered nonstick skillet over medium for 1½ minutes; sprinkle each with 1 Tbsp. popped popcorn. Flip, press lightly, and cook 1½ minutes more. Serve topped with maple syrup and more popcorn. 2 P O P C O R N PA R M C R I S P S

Toss together 6 cups popped popcorn, 2 Tbsp. melted unsalted butter, 1 tsp. finely chopped fresh rosemary, and 1/4 tsp. each kosher salt and black pepper. Spread on a parchment-lined baking sheet and sprinkle with 1 cup shredded Parmesan. Bake at 350°F until cheese is golden brown in spots, 5 to 7 minutes. Let cool for 15 minutes; break into pieces. 3 POPCORN TR AIL M I X T R E AT S

Mix up your popcorn game with the surprising and delicious add-ons at realsimple.com/ toppings.

By Adina Steiman Recipes by Liz Mer vosh

28 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Photograph by Corey Olsen

P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y M I A K O K AT O H

Melt 4 Tbsp. unsalted butter and 12 oz. marshmallows in a large pot over mediumhigh; stir until smooth. Add 11 cups popped popcorn and 1/3 cup each raisins, dried cranberries, peanuts, and pistachios; stir to combine. Press into a greased 13-by-9-in. baking dish. Let cool until firm, 30 minutes.

making smiles from start to finish Fleischmann’s® Skillet Cinnamon Rolls Find joy in this and every recipe on breadworld.com ©2019 ACH Food Companies, Inc. FLEISCHMANN’S is a registered trademark of AB Mauri Food Inc. Used under license.

W H AT W E LO V E

S W E AT E R S AV E R

Swipe this gentle little brush over a natural fiber, like cashmere, to remove pills, fuzz, or pet hair. Also works on upholstery. TO BUY: Lilly Brush Save Our Sweaters, $13; amazon.com.

S OA P T O G O

Have kids draw on their hands with these portable scented soap pens. To remove the drawing, they have to rub their hands under warm water for 20 to 40 seconds, ensuring proper handwashing. Each pen provides over 100 washes. TO BUY: SoaPen, $15 for 3; amazon.com.

ECO-CONSCIOUS L AUNDRY P ODS

These pouches hold a biodegradable formula that’s compatible with all machines and tough on stains. They’re shipped to your door in a recyclable, compostable, plasticfree box that doubles as a storage bin. TO BUY: $32 for 140 loads (with subscription); dropps.com.

Little Helpers TO M A K E YO U R L I F E E A S I E R By Brandi Broxson

CUTE COMPRESSION SOCKS

C H A RG I N G L A M P

Great for a dorm room, this desk lamp can wirelessly charge Qicertified phones and has an energy-efficient LED that lasts up to 40,000 hours. TO BUY: OttLite Shine LED Desk Lamp with Wireless Charging, $50; amazon.com.

These wool-and-nylon socks cushion the contours of your feet for extra comfort and feature 15 to 20 mm/Hg of graduated compression. TO BUY: Cushioned Compression Socks, $35; fitssock.com.

T W O - I N - O N E C U T T I N G B OA R D

One side has a channel to trap juices from meat or fruit. The other side is smooth for serving cheese or chopping. An angled edge makes it easy to collect diced veggies or minced garlic. Available in walnut or maple. TO BUY: The Angled Board, $77; materialkitchen.com.

30 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

S O C K S : B R I A N H E N N ; P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S

S I X S M A RT P RO D U C T S

Trademarks owned by Société des Produits Nestlé S.A., Vevey, Switzerland.

W H AT W E LO V E

Room Rx N OT SU R E H OW TO WO R K A RO U N D T H O S E T R I C K Y S P OT S I N YO U R H O M E? C O R T N E Y B I S H O P , P R I N C I PA L D E S I G N E R A N D O W N E R O F C O R T N E Y B I S H O P D E S I G N I N C H A R L E ST O N , S O U T H C A RO L I N A , O F F E R S H E R E X P E RT A DV I C E . By Stephanie Sisco

M A K E A S TAT E M E N T

W E AV E I N T E X T U R E

I L LU M I N AT E T H E I S L A N D

A D D WA R M T H

On the wall with no upper cabinets, take your tile to the top of the window trim for an eye-catching focal point. TO BUY: Canyon 6 Handpainted Tile, $73 per sq. ft.; tabarkastudio.com for info.

Incorporate some woven accents, such as barstools or window coverings, to prevent the space from feeling stark and sterile. TO BUY: Tejido Counter Stool, $349; cb2.com.

Hang pendant lights above the island to add character and draw the eye in. This is especially helpful in an open-concept space. TO BUY: Terra Pendant, $239; cedarandmoss.com.

As serene as minimalism can be, an empty kitchen can feel cold. Rugs and greenery will bring life to the room. TO BUY: Moroccan Flatweave Rug by Sarah Sherman Samuel, from $98; luluandgeorgia.com. Submit your own design dilemmas to room.rx@realsimple.com.

32 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Illustration by Babeth Lafon

P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S

I have no upper cabinets in my kitchen but want to add backsplash tile. Where is the best stopping point? I’d also love advice on making this modern and minimalist space feel warmer and more inviting. —Jenna, homeowner in Ontario, Canada

A carafe of dark roast for the holiday party.

A cup of Pumpkin Spice for the party of one.

The brewer that the whole family will love. Just add ground coffee for a crowd-pleasing carafe, or pop in a K-Cup® pod for a freshly brewed cup. So everyone can get the coffee they want.

Keurig.com

YOU MOVE, THEY DON’T.

®Registered Trademark of Kimberly-Clark Worldwide, Inc. © KCWW

NEW POISE® ACTIVE COLLECTION™ WITH NO-SLIP WINGS.

5X DRIER*

UNIQUE NO-SLIP WINGS

NEW No-Slip Wings that are designed to stay put, so you don’t have protected with The #1 Brand for Light Bladder Leaks. Get a free sample at poise.com *vs. the leading period pads

STAY YOU. STAY AMAZING.

U N C O M M O N S O L U T I O N S T O E V E RY D AY P R O B L E M S

STO C KSY

A D IY FIX FO R S H INY FLO O R S (A N D IT S M E LL S A M A Z IN G) Everything looks and feels better when the floors are clean. Try this streak-free solution inspired by Melissa Maker, founder of the cleaning company Clean My Space. It refreshes floors and leaves a spalike scent. In a bucket, mix a gallon of hot water, a quarter cup of rubbing alcohol, and a pure essential oil, like citrus. Use about 10 drops of oil for tile and two or three drops for hardwood or laminate, as too much can leave a residue. Dip your mop or pad mop in the solution and wring well (if it drips, it’s too wet for hardwood). “A microfiber pad mop is ideal for most types of flooring because it’s best at controlling moisture,” says Patrick Redwood, manager of the quality and testing lab at the cleaning company Libman. By Leslie Corona

Photograph by Jodie Johnson

Find more tricks to freshen up your home at realsimple.com/ goodsmells.

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

One Pan. Six Friends. Zero Fuss. ®

Since before Friendsgiving was invented, Reynolds Wrap has been making it easy to cook for a crowd. And just as easy to clean up after. Traditions change. Our quality hasn’t.

Recipes at ReynoldsKitchens.com/holidays

THE REALIST

Cooking School YO U R G U I D E T O T H A N K S G I V I N G L E F T OV E R S — H E AT I N G T H E M , F R E E Z I N G T H E M , A N D M O S T I M P O R T A N T LY, E A T I N G T H E M By Adina Steiman

ROA S T T U R K E Y

BAKED SIDE DISHES

M A S H E D P OTATO E S

Cut meat off bones, wrap in foil, and place in freezer bags. Use bones for stock; for an Instant Pot version, add them with onions, carrots, celery, and herbs. Cover with water by 1 inch and cook on high pressure for 30 minutes with natural release. Strain and use for soup, risotto, or gumbo.

To maintain the texture of dishes like sweet potato casserole, gratin, and stuffing, avoid microwaving. Reheat in a wide, ovenproof container, covered with foil, at 300°F until warm in the middle. Then uncover and broil briefly (or, if using a toaster oven, toast) to crisp up the top.

Always reheat with a bit more milk and a pat of butter. Or use straight from the fridge as a topping for a quick shepherd’s pie. For an easy fall soup, thin out with chicken broth and simmer with sautéed leeks, thyme, and a splash of white wine.

RO L L S , B R E A D S & B I S C U I T S

ALL THE PIES

Cube rolls and freeze to use in strata, bread pudding, or more (yes, more) stuffing. Toast cornbread and biscuits to eat with jam the next day, or crumble and mix with butter and brown sugar to make a quick-baking cobbler topping for cooked fruit.

Store fruit pies, loosely wrapped in plastic, at room temperature to maintain the crust’s texture. Stash pumpkin, pecan, and icebox pies in the fridge. Eat with yogurt for breakfast, or layer with ice cream and maple syrup for a next-day dessert.

How Long Will It Keep?

RO O M T E M P FRID GE F ROZ E N

Tu r key

G ra v y

Stuffing

Mashed Pota to e s

Sweet Potatoes

Cranberry Sauce

B re a d s

Fr u i t Pies

O th e r Pies

— 3 to 4 days 3 months

— 2 days 2 months

— 3 days 3 months

— 3 to 4 days 2 months

— 3 days —

— 2 weeks 2 months

1 to 2 days — 1 month

2 days — —

— 2 days —

Illustrations by Adam Cruft

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

THE REALIST

The Best Post-Thanksgiving Sandwich, Explained Stock a loaf of sliced pullman bread and Thanksgiving leftovers will disappear in record time. Follow this plan to build a top-notch lunch.

Use leftover cooked green beans instead of lettuce

Spread cranberry sauce on top piece of toast

Cheers to everyone’s

favorite part of the meal.

Fry slabs of stuffing in butter until warm and crisp Sprinkle thinly sliced turkey with a bit of flaky sea salt

Mix cold grav y with mayo and spread on bottom toast

More Formulas to Make the Most of Your Leftovers T U R K E Y + M A S H E D P OTATO E S = T U R K E Y S H E P H E R D ’ S P I E

Sauté extra onions, carrots, celery, and herbs in butter until tender, then add chopped cooked turkey and extra gravy, thinned out with milk and cream. Simmer for 5 to 10 minutes, then transfer to a baking dish and top with cold mashed potatoes. Bake at 350°F until filling is warmed through and topping is golden brown, about 30 minutes. Serve with cranberry sauce alongside. S T U F F I N G + ROA S T E D V EG G I E S = S T U F F I N G B A K E D EG G S

Spread leftover stuffing and extra roasted vegetables in a greased 13-by-9-inch pan and bake until crispy. Make hollows in 6 places and crack an egg into each; sprinkle with grated cheese and bake at 400°F until crispy. Top with chopped herbs. S W E E T P OTATO E S + C R A N B E R RY S AU C E = S W E E T P OTATO WA F F L E S

Whisk 1 cup leftover sweet potato puree with 3 beaten eggs, 1 cup milk, and 6 Tbsp. melted butter until smooth. Whisk 1 1/2 cups flour, 2 tsp. each baking powder and pumpkin pie spice, and 1/2 tsp. kosher salt in a separate bowl. Stir flour mixture into sweet potato mixture, then ladle by 1/2 cupfuls into a greased, hot waffle maker; cook until golden brown. Serve topped with maple syrup and cranberry sauce.

M O R E F RO M O U R K I T C H E N Find videos, lessons, shortcuts, and strategies to help you get dinner (and breakfast, and lunch, and dessert) on the table with ease at realsimple.com/cookingschool.

38 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Let’s give thanks for the side dishes.

Stock up on these fool-proof Thanksgiving show stealers today. Pillsbury.com

THE REALIST

Now What?!? S M A RT F I X E S F O R L I F E ’ S L I T T L E D I S A ST E R S By Kristine Gill

One of my decorative china plates is chipped. If your china is white, it will be easier to repair, but this method works for colored and patterned pieces too, says Morty Bachar of Lakeside Pottery in Rehoboth Beach, Delaware. Mix up a 50/50 epoxy resin material (like PC-Products Clear Epoxy, $3; amazon .com) on a paper plate or small piece of paper with a toothpick. Then use the toothpick to smear the material onto the chippedoff piece; press it back onto the china plate with your fingers. Work quickly, as epoxy resin begins to cure in about 90 seconds. Allow excess to ooze from the chipped area and give it about an hour to cure. Then, using a utility knife, remove the excess epoxy resin from the china’s surface. Apply an epoxy filler to the cracks (Bachar likes PC-Products PC-11 Epoxy Filler, $15; amazon.com). Once the filler has cured, sand the area with 220grit sandpaper, followed by 400-grit sandpaper. Leave the repair to the pros if your piece is antique. THE FIX:

40 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Ah! I accidentally used permanent marker on my whiteboard. First let the permanent marker dry, says expert cleaner Melissa Maker. Next, find a dryerase marker and write over the lines you drew in permanent marker. Then erase all the scribblings together—everything may come off in one swipe. This trick works best when the permanent markings are fresh, notes Maker. If your marker lines are old or stubborn, try applying a generous amount of rubbing alcohol to a paper towel or soft cloth and using some elbow grease to erase them. Just avoid anything that might scratch the whiteboard, like a heavy-duty sponge.

The cork broke as I was opening the wine. Insert the corkscrew into the broken cork and try to remove the remaining part. If that fails, says Chelsie Petras, creator of Chel Loves Wine, a wine and lifestyle site, find a screw about two inches long. Turn the screw into the broken cork with a screwdriver (or a towel to protect your hand). Then grab the screw with the back end of a hammer and pry out the cork; work slowly to prevent further damage. In a pinch, Petras says you can push the cork into the bottle with the handle of a wooden spoon. Strain your wine with a strainer, a mesh tea infuser, or cheesecloth to remove any cork pieces that might be floating in the bottle.

THE FIX:

G E T T Y I M AG ES

THE FIX:

A little bread. A little cheese. A lot of Wow.

THE REALIST

PRESEASON PREP

Company’s Coming! Clean Up Fast YO U R G U I D E TO G E T T I N G T I DY B E FO R E— D I N G - D O N G ! — H O L I D AY G U E S T S A R R I V E A N D E N T E R T A I N I N G S E A S O N O F F I C I A L LY B E G I N S . B y J u l i e Va d n a l

42 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

The most important part of entertaining, of course, is enjoying your guests, not stressing about Aunt Martha judging your under-the-bed dust bunnies. But if it’s been a while since your last big clean, now is a great time to spiff up what you can. If you have the time and a love of cleaning, tackle it all. If not, pick a room or a few tasks you think will make the biggest impact. Our experts devised methods that require the least elbow grease possible, so you can give thanks for less scrubbing.

Illustrations by Asia Pietrzyk

Sunbrella® is a registered trademark of Glen Raven, Inc.

S U N B R E L L A

F A B R I C S

Unconditional love requires unconditional fabrics.

THE REALIST

• W I P E D O W N S TA I N L E S S - S T E E L

with a microfiber cloth dampened in vinegar. Follow with a water-dampened cloth to remove excess. APPLIANCES

by running a cycle with equal parts white vinegar and water. When half the liquid has brewed, stop the machine. Let it sit for an hour to loosen any oily coffee-ground residue. Finish the cycle, then run it a few more times with plain water until you can’t smell vinegar anymore. If you have a single-serve machine that takes pods, use a descaling solution (like Keurig’s Descaling Solution, $13; keurig.com), which is odorless and removes calcium deposits that can muck up your cuppa.

• R E V I V E YO U R C O F F E E M A K E R

KITCHEN • W O R K I N G F RO M T H E T O P D O W N ,

dust cabinets, countertops, and other solid surfaces, taking care to hit the spots that don’t often get a lot of TLC (like the top of the fridge). and debris from wood cabinets with Murphy Oil Soap ($4; homedepot.com). Dilute about half a cup of oil soap in a gallon of warm water. Dip a sponge or cloth in the solution and wipe the cabinets, focusing on the area around knobs, which tends to get the dirtiest and is at guests’ eye level.

• CLEAN GREASE BUILDUP

Dip a sponge in soapy water, squeeze it over the spill, and let the water sit for 10 minutes. In that time, the spill will soften and become easy to wipe up with a cloth.

• TA C K L E S T OV E T O P S P I L L S .

• R E F R E S H T H E M I C RO WAV E . Heat

four tablespoons of vinegar in a bowl for four minutes to loosen gunk, then wipe up the gunk with a paper towel.

• R E M OV E I T E M S F RO M T H E F R I D G E

and pantry one shelf at a time and wipe the shelf with all-purpose cleaner. Clean condiment bottles and jars so sticky residue doesn’t undo your work. As you replace the items, take a moment to relocate anything that would make more sense in a different spot.

44 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

• MOP SE ALED WO OD OR STONE

with a diluted solution of Mrs. Meyer’s Multi-Surface Concentrate ($9; target.com) or a neutral pH soap; wring out the mop so excess water doesn’t sit on the surface. Dry-mop laminate flooring, and give tiles new life with a steam cleaner (like the PowerEdge Lift-Off 2-in-1 Steam Mop, $70; bissel.com), which kills bacteria and removes dirt. FLO OR S

L I V I N G RO O M

• VA C U U M C A R P E T S A N D RU G S , then spot-treat with Hoover Professional Strength Instant Stain Remover ($8; amazon.com), which can lift stains you may not have noticed.

and pillow covers (check the tags to make sure yours are machine washable). Let them air-dry to prevent shrinking. Use a handheld steamer to refresh your upholstered couch and curtains.

• L AU N D E R T H RO W B L A N K E T S

including bookcases and the top of the TV console, with a microfiber cloth. While you’re at it, reorganize books into neat stacks and water wilted houseplants. (Pretty spaces just look cleaner.)

• D U S T S U R FA C E S ,

from the TV with a soft, dry cloth. For more serious smudges surrounding the screen, add a drop of dish soap to a quarter cup of water; barely dampen a soft cloth to wipe. Follow with a water-only cloth, then a dry one. Wipe remotes with the lightly dampened cloth.

• R E M OV E F I N G E R P R I N T S

D I N I N G RO O M from all surfaces, including the buffet and bar cart. Give the table and chairs a good once-over and wipe up any splatters with a damp cloth. Launder table linens.

• WIPE DUST

from upholstered dining chairs, then use a staintreatment spray, like Folex Carpet Spot Remover ($10; bedbathand beyond.com), on any visible marks. Blot with an absorbent cloth to remove excess. If you’re in the

• VA C U U M C RU M B S

THE REALIST

market for new chairs to seat all your guests, opt for furniture made with a stain-resistant fabric, like Sunbrella. • S E T YO U R TA B L E A H E A D O F T I M E .

Keeping your table set year-round will prevent it from becoming a catchall for mail and homework— and you won’t have to retidy it before an event. If your good china has been gathering dust on a shelf all year, give it a quick warm-water rinse in the dishwasher or sink.

B AT H RO O M S • S H I N E M I R RO R S

with glass cleaner and a microfiber cloth, moving in an S motion to help prevent streaks.

• W I P E T H E VA N I T Y

and sink with a microfiber cloth and all-purpose cleaner.

• S C RU B T H E O U T S I D E O F T H E

while a bowl cleaner does its magic on the inside. (Let it sit for 10 minutes, then brush and flush.) Spray the inside and outside of the empty wastebasket with all-purpose cleaner and wipe dry. TOILET

• TA C K L E T H E S H O W E R A N D T U B

with Scrubbing Bubbles Shower Foamer ($5; lowes.com). Just spray it, wait 10 minutes, and wipe the surface with a wet sponge. • CLEAN THE MEDICINE CABINET

shelves with a damp cloth and arrange bottles to face forward. It’s a small move that will make the space feel extra tidy. • VA C U U M T H E F L O O R ,

then mop

THE QUICK REFRESH

For Overnight Guests

These almost-instant spruceups are designed to be done the day of.

Dust surfaces and move daily clutter into a closet or office. “There’s no shame in having off-limits spaces. Shut the door and say to your guests, ‘Hey, do me a favor: Don’t go in there. It’s a disaster right now,’” says Melissa Maker, founder of the cleaning company Clean My Space.

Before the Party Save vacuuming for the morning before a big dinner party, suggests Becky Rapinchuk, founder of the site Clean Mama. (Slow and deliberate movements pick up the most dirt.) Wipe bathroom surfaces with glass cleaner and a microfiber cloth.

Ahead of Curious Visitors There’s bound to be one guest who asks for the grand tour, so send each family member to their room with the following tasks: Take bedding to the laundry room, turn off the ceiling fan and dust it with a damp microfiber cloth, shine windows with glass cleaner, and run a microfiber duster along blinds. Then pass the vacuum from room to room. Or just set a timer for 20 minutes and have everyone do what they can—beyond that, don’t worry about it.

For Surprise Drop-Ins “A good-smelling home suggests the space is cleaner than it actually is,” says Melissa Witulski, Merry Maids’ housecleaning expert. Open windows to circulate air, and add two cinnamon sticks and a drop of vanilla extract to a pot of boiling water for an inviting aroma.

O U R E X P E RTS DONNA SMALLIN KUPER, CERTIFIED HOUSECLEANING TECHNICIAN MELISSA MAKER, FOUNDER OF THE CLEANING COMPANY CLEAN MY SPACE BECKY RAPINCHUK, FOUNDER OF THE SITE CLEAN MAMA

your way out the door.

MELISSA WITULSKI, MERRY MAIDS’ HOUSECLEANING EXPERT

46 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

For a list of spots that can go without a refresh before guests, see realsimple.com/skipcleaning.

SAY GOODBYE TO DUST, DANDER, AND NASTIES

CLOUD CONTROL™ CLUMPING LITTER •100% DUST FREE •HYPOALLERGENIC LIGHT SCENT •BLOCKS AIRBORNE DANDER

Sleeping Well on the Road SECRETS FROM A SLEEP DOCTOR TRAVEL CAN BE EXHILARATING, and potentially sleep disrupting. But good sleep is attainable with a little planning and a hotel that supports healthy routines, like one of Westin Hotels & Resorts’ 230 worldwide locations. Dr. Chris Winter, a neurologist, frequent traveler, and author of The Sleep Solution: Why Your Sleep Is Broken and How to Fix It, shares some fool-proof tips to sleeping well on the road.

OUTSMART JET LAG Traveling across time zones inevitably leads to what scientists call circadian dysrhythmia, also known as jet lag. In fact, 93 percent of travelers will experience jet lag at some point, according to the American Sleep Association. But worry not, says Dr. Winter, “planning in advance makes all the difference.” A few days before

EXERCISE WISELY

TO SEE HOW WESTIN

can help you get your rest while traveling, visit Westin.com.

Get active—preferably outside—on the morning of your arrival, Dr. Winter advises. “When I was in Vegas, I got up early for a run on the Strip,” he says. “The light helped me adjust to the time, and the workout created fatigue that helped me sleep well.” Need a good route for your run? Westin provides scenic running maps, a Run Concierge who can take you on a group jog, and a unique Gear Lending program that allows you to borrow running shoes and fitness

clothing during your stay. Dr. Winter says that while early morning is the best time to exercise, any time is better than no time.

CREATE A SLEEP SANCTUARY Before getting ready for bed, make sure your hotel room is conducive to sleep: dim the lights, and drink a cup of chamomile or passionflower tea—a favorite with Dr. Winter. Other tips: Read before bed—from a real book. Unplug your devices. Take a hot shower or bath, and keep the room cool, 65 to 68 degrees. And, Dr. Winter says, your mattress and bedding should be comfortable. “It’s obvious, but that really makes a difference,” he says. At Westin, guests enjoy the signature Heavenly® Bed at every one of their locations worldwide. Dr. Winter’s final pre-bed ritual: a relaxing scent. Westin’s Sleep Well Lavender Balm is geared toward helping your body wind down. And sometimes that’s just what it takes to send you into dreamland.

traveling, adjust your schedule so you go to sleep, wake up, and eat your meals earlier. Another fix: eating a protein-filled breakfast once you arrive in your destination. “Protein flips a switch that tells the brain to wake up,” Dr. Winter says. At Westin, the new Eat Well Menu includes healthy, flexibly portioned dishes and snacks, with breakfast options that include eggs, whole grains, and fresh smoothies.

THE REALIST

Drugstore Insider T H E B E ST B E AU T Y P RO D U C T S I N T H E A I S L E S, H A N D P I C K E D BY A P RO

Shani Darden This Beverly Hills–based celebrity aesthetician is known for treating tough acne and rosacea, and for her skin-care products, including hero Retinol Reform. For tips, follow @shanidarden.

The Honest Company Baby Wipes “Whether I’m cleaning up after my kids or my celebrity clients, these wipes get everything— I mean everything.” TO BUY: $5 for 72; target.com.

Kristin Ess Style Reviving Dry Shampoo “I go a few days without washing, so dry shampoo is a must. This strengthens while absorbing oil.” TO BUY: $14; target.com.

Neosporin Original Ointment “I am never without a tube of this. I use it all the time—for cuts, for my kids’ scrapes. I even dab it on to help heal a pimple.” TO BUY: $5; cvs.com.

50 RE AL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Garnier SkinActive Water Rose 24H Moisture Gel “Moisturizing is one of the most important steps in a skin-care routine. This hydrator is packed with hyaluronic acid and rose water. It stands out for its silky, lightweight texture.” (Darden consults for Garnier.) TO BUY: $15; cvs.com.

Versed The Shortcut Overnight Facial Peel “My job is to help people glow. Apply this before bed and let the lactic and glycolic acids help remove dead cells and reveal bright skin.” TO BUY: $20; target.com.

H E A D S H O T C O U R T E S Y O F S H A N I D A R D E N ; P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S

Aquaphor Healing Ointment “This is a staple in my bag. It’s not only great for dry patches, like on lips; I also dab it on for glossy eyelids.” TO BUY: $7 for 3.5 oz.; target.com.

60% OF WOMEN ARE WEARING THE WRONG SIZE PAD. ALL OF THEM CAN CHANGE THAT.

Discover Always My Fit™, a range of ﬁve different pad sizes. Try the next size up for up to 20% better coverage day or night.

THE REALIST

R o a d Te s t

At-Home Spa F I N D I N G A M O M E N T O F Z E N I S N ’ T E A S Y. T H E S E S E L F- C A R E STA P L E S C A N H E L P YO U F I T S O M E M E T I M E I N TO YO U R S C H E D U L E. By Lisa D eSantis

BEST TO OL

Esker Restorative Oil + Allover Roller Duo Post-shower, smooth on the oil, then glide the beveled jade roller over your body to boost circulation and feel like you’re getting a massage. TO BUY: $98; eskerbeauty.com. B E S T B O DY WA S H

B E S T B AT H P RO D U C T

Asutra Magnesium Flakes Soak Pain Away Add two cups of these flakes to a warm bath to soothe muscle tension and help you drift off to sleep a little more easily. TO BUY: $14; asutra.com.

B E S T B O DY T R E AT M E N T

BEST EYE MASK BEST HOME FR AGR ANCE

Saje Aroma Om Blush Edition Ultrasonic Diffuser When you can’t get to the spa, turn your home into one with this chic electric diffuser that doubles as an LED lamp. Fill the reservoir with water and add 10 drops of eucalyptus or lavender essential oil for instant calm. You can set it to run continuously for three hours or intermittently for six. A big plus: It’s super quiet. TO BUY: $90; saje.com.

52 RE AL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Lancôme Génifique Hydrogel Melting 360° Eye Mask Refresh puffy eyes with this peptide-infused gel mask. After 20 minutes, remove the mask and rub in excess serum. TO BUY: $11; lancome-usa.com.

Dr. Brandt Microdermabrasion Body Almost as good as a professional scrub. Rub it on dry skin for a strong exfoliation or on wet skin for a gentler slough. TO BUY: $44; drbrandt.com.

B AT H F L A K E S : B R I A N H E N N ; P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S

realsimple ROAD TE ST

Rituals The Ritual of Karma Foaming Shower Gel Upgrade your shower routine with this frothy body wash laced with white tea. It makes a nice shaving cream too. TO BUY: $9.50; rituals.com.

THE REALIST

Real Simplifier

How to Sell Your Stuff Online R E A DY T O T U R N YO U R U N WA N T E D I T E M S I N T O C A S H ? F O L L O W T H I S E X P E RT- E N D O R S E D P L A N T O M A K E I T H A P P E N . By Cher yl Lock

D O YO U R R E S E A RC H

CLEAN UP GO ODS

USE THE RIGHT WORDS

SHIP WITH CARE

P L AY I T S A F E

Research helps you determine what items are most likely to sell and how to best price them, says Andrea Woroch, a consumer finance expert. Start by searching for the item you’d like to sell on sites like Poshmark and eBay. Then use filters to search for ones that have already sold so you can see the selling prices. You can also try UsedPrice.com, which helps you value particular items, like tech goods. Once you have a price in mind, list the item for 15 percent higher than you’re willing to sell it for so you have room to haggle, suggests Woroch. “Buyers love to get a deal and may bite if they think they got you to come down in price,” she says.

Launder or dry-clean clothing before photographing it. Wipe electronics with a microfiber or lens cloth. “If you’re selling a smartphone or tablet, back up your data, like photos and contacts,” says Jonathan Lowe, a spokesperson with the classifieds website Letgo. Also remove your SIM card and delete everything from the device. Good pictures will definitely get you better offers, says Lowe. Snap photos in a well-lit, uncluttered spot. Put smaller items, like jewelry, on a solid-colored rug or blanket. Be up-front about damage and take a detail shot for the listing.

Include as many keywords—both general (“smartphone”) and specific (“iPhone X”)—as possible so your listing reaches people using different search terms. “Generally, a good practice is to put the formal name of the item in the title. Go into the specifics of the item’s condition in the description, and add a section with keywords relevant to the item,” says Natalie Angelillo, vice president of community for the classifieds website OfferUp. Call out anything special, like the fact that the item is brand-new or has never been removed from the box, in the title or description.

To help protect items in transit, choose the smallest box possible, filling any empty space with newspaper, and cushion delicate objects with bubble wrapping and/or biodegradable packing peanuts. Hate waiting in line to ship your stuff? Check your selling platform: Poshmark and OfferUp email sellers prepaid shipping labels, so all you have to do is pack the item, print and attach the label, and drop off the box. Through eBay, you can print FedEx, USPS, or UPS shipping labels at a discounted rate.

Many selling platforms offer a messaging feature, but if yours doesn’t, consider creating a second email account that doesn’t show your full first or last name, says online-safety expert Denise DeRosa, founder of Cyber Sensible. Payment should be made through the platform’s secure site or another secure payment service, like PayPal. The most successful sellers are responsive sellers: Turn on notifications so you never miss a message from someone who is interested, says Lowe. Receptive and honest sellers get good reviews, and good reviews are more likely to lead to better sales.

54 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Illustrations by Amy van Luijk

The

Secret Formula to Losing Weight, Fat and Inches! Is it possible to give our bodies an all-new setup, to burn more fat again, sleep better, and wake up energized and excited to start the day? A new gold standard study conducted by researchers at the University of Alberta revealed that Almased, a low-glycemic high-protein (LGHP) diet significantly increases the resting metabolism compared to a healthy standard diet. The results occurred on the very first day. Furthermore, the body began burning fat instead of food carbohydrates much earlier. The results of this breakthrough study were confirmed by two more studies, in which researchers discovered that the LGHP Diet significantly increases the fat-burning hormone adiponectin and also supports healthy blood sugar levels and appetite-regulating hormones like ghrelin and leptin.

Developed over 30 years ago by holistic therapist Hubertus Trouillé to improve his patients’ metabolism and health, Almased‘s unique multi-protein quality formula is designed to precisely fit the amino acid profile that the body needs for optimal function, Using active, naturally- derived enzymes, Almased increases the availability of these essential amino acids as well as immune-boosting and anti-inflammatory bioactive peptides such as Lunasin. This unique combination of weight loss, weight management, and overall health is why Almased has become the number one meal replacement worldwide.

HOW THE LOW-GLYCEMIC HIGH-PROTEIN DIET WORKS

Starting Phase

Kick oﬀ your diet with a low-calorie nutritious fast for 3 to 14 days to boost the metabolism.

Reduction Phase In this phase, build healthy eating habits, while keeping your metabolism up! Continue until you reach your desired goals!

Read more and download the diet plan at ﬁgureplan.com/RS11C

BOOST THE METABOLISM! Shop for Almased at one of these ﬁne retailers:

A LOT MORE ENERGY! “After 2 weeks, I had lost almost 10 lbs. I feel great! I sleep amazingly and I have a lot of energy and am not hungry at all.” - Olenka F.

These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. Individual results will vary. Consult with a physician before starting on any weight loss program.

THE REALIST

5 C R E AT E A L A N D I N G PA D

1 ARR ANGE PILES

Start by sorting your paperwork into categories (household, school, pets). Shred outdated or unneeded documents that contain personal information, like your name, address, and especially Social Security or credit card number. Less sensitive documents can just be recycled. 2 S O RT W I T H E A S E

Create labels with big-picture categories listed first, followed by narrower descriptions (“Medical: Julie” or “Taxes: 2017”). Use manila folders with all right- or left-hand tabs— they’re faster to flip through than assorted-position tabs— and alphabetize. 3 S I Z E A P P RO P R I AT E LY

I F I T ’ S A D I G I TA L W O R L D, W H Y I S T H E R E S T I L L S O M U C H PA P E R P I L I N G U P ? ST R E A M L I N E YO U R F I L I N G SYST E M W I T H T H E S E E X P E RT-A P P ROV E D T I P S. By Sierra Guardiola

6 K E E P I T N E AT

Do a big sweep of your regularly accessed files every three to six months. Archive or shred documents that are no longer relevant. Tax returns and documents pertaining to household repairs should be kept for at least three years. G O PA P E R L E S S

Organizing documents digitally obviously poses fewer space challenges, and your computer’s search tool can help you find exactly what you’re looking for. Follow the same guidelines for digital labels as for physical ones. Back up files onto an external hard drive, or use a cloud storage service, like Google Drive. The Evernote Scannable app (free; iOS) helps you quickly convert paper files into digital ones.

4 C O N S I D E R F R EQ U E N C Y

Out-of-the-way storage spots (think high shelves in lessused closets) are perfect places to archive files like tax returns and bank statements. Reserve easy-access locations for items you need more regularly, like school forms and recipes.

O U R E X P E RTS ANNA BAUER, THUMBTACK HOME ORGANIZER JAMIE HORD, FOUNDER OF HORDERLY PROFESSIONAL ORGANIZING CLEA SHEARER AND JOANNA TEPLIN, FOUNDERS OF THE HOME EDIT WENDY SILBERSTEIN, FOUNDER OF THE AESTHETIC ORGANIZER

56 RE AL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

M A R T I S A N S / S T O C K S Y. C O M

Organize This

Determine how much storage space you need. If you maintain most of your files digitally, for example, don’t use a large filing cabinet. It’s a waste of space, and you may be tempted to fill it with files you don’t need or items that don’t belong in a filing cabinet. Instead, opt for a desktop file box.

Set up a daily drop zone in a high-traffic area, such as the kitchen, for incoming mail and paperwork. Designating a single spot will prevent piles from accumulating throughout the house. An inbox or wall-mounted basket will conserve space and make it obvious when items are overflowing and need to be dealt with. Filter out junk mail and filler paper before adding anything to the drop zone. Address the items that land here at least twice a week, then file or recycle them.

T H E O R I G I N A L S O U T H E R N O U T F I T T E R TM

shop online at S O U T H E R N M A R S H . C O M

THE REALIST

Everyday Treasures 2

T H E S E D A I N T Y, F E A T H E R W E I G H T J E W E L RY P I E C E S A R E S O E A SY TO W E A R, YO U ’L L N E V E R W A N T T O T A K E T H E M O F F. By Flavia Nunez Photographs by Jong Hyup Son

EARRINGS Details like clasping links, sparkly stones on open hoops, and Swarovski pearls make these baubles playful and eye-catching. TO BUY: 1 Alta Capture Charm Earrings, $175; monicavinader.com. 2 Mike Earrings, $55; stellaandbow.com. 3 Molly Petite Hoops, $60; liliclaspe.com.

BRACELETS Subtle arm charms—some with adjustable chains or personalized initials— can make a surprisingly grand statement.

S T Y L I N G B Y PA M E L A D U N C A N S I LV E R F O R S A R A H L A I R D & G O O D C O M PA N Y

1 Summer Single Pearl Bracelet, $132; the9thmuse.com. 2 Riva Mini Kite Diamond Bracelet, $275; monicavinader.com. 3 Bold Spheres Bracelet, $295; mejuri.com. 4 Chain Letter Bracelet, $107; tiary.com. 5 Aurora Bracelet, $69; maisonmiru.com.

TO BUY:

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

RINGS Barely there bands look equally pretty stacked together or sprinkled among different digits.

4 3

1 Serafina Diamond Stacking Ring, $250; baublebar.com. 2 14k Ripple Ring, $395; amandapearl.com. 3 Wave Ring, $300; kendrascott.com. 4 Open Circle Ring with Mother of Pearl Inlay, $165; stoneandstrand.com. 5 Caviar Ring, $495; lagos.com. TO BUY:

60 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Naughty or Nice, something special is coming your way, starting at $69

Non-binding recommended retail prices. Items are subject to availability.

#SparkDelight

THE REALIST

NECKL ACES Worn on their own or layered, these simple strands add interest and elegance to any outfit.

1 Taner Bar Short Lariat, $65; gorjana.com. 2 Anna & Ava Necklace, $30; dillards.com. 3 Dainty CZ Station Necklace, $65; czby kennethjaylane.com. 4 Mini Chevron Diamond Bar Necklace, $395; bluenile.com.

TO BUY:

62 RE AL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Moisture Surge™ 72-Hour Auto-Replenishing Hydrator Allergy Tested. 100% Fragrance Free.

Now, give your skin the power to rehydrate itself. Discover Moisture Surge™ with activated aloe water that helps skin create its own internal water source. Keeps it almost twice as hydrated at the end of the day than it did before.* And skin is plump and dewy for 72 hours—even after washing your face. Always formulated for maximum results with zero irritation. Starting at $21.** clinique.com *vs. previous formula. **Suggested retail price.

No parabens. No phthalates. No fragrance. Just happy skin.

THE REALIST

Closet Care

Cashmere Sweater Y E S, A Q UA L I T Y S W E AT E R C A N B E E X P E N S I V E — B U T W I T H O U R E X P E RT S ’ I N S I G H T S, YO U C A N K E E P YO U R S COZ Y T H RO U G H CO U N T L E SS W I N T E R S. By Mar y Honkus

How to Buy B E P R I C E S AV V Y. Cashmere is priced based on weight. A heavier, better-quality sweater will run you about $250. A lighter, more basic one will cost about $150. O P T F O R A B L E N D. Blends aren’t quite as soft as 100 percent cashmere, but they’re slightly less expensive and often last longer. C O N S I D E R C O LO R . A sweater

in a lighter color, like ivory, tends to feel softer than a darker one, since the yarn wasn’t exposed to as many dyes.

How to Repair S E W U P H O L E S . If moths manage to get to your sweater, turn it inside out and loosely sew the holes closed. R E V E R S E S T R E TC H .

Gently wash the sweater, then reshape it to the size you want—it will retain the new dimensions when it dries. R I N S E S TA I N S . Most marks

should disappear if you blot the spot with baby shampoo, rinse it in cold water, and lay the sweater flat to dry.

How to Care WA S H BY H A N D. Cashmere

is delicate, and handwashing helps prevent damage. Mix a mild detergent or a baby shampoo with cool or lukewarm water, and let your sweater soak for about five minutes before rinsing. Lay it flat on a towel to dry. Don’t wring it out—that can cause fibers to stretch. Steam the sweater between washes so it stays looking fresh.

O U R E X P E RT S KIMBERLY CONRAD, FOUNDER OF FILORO LESLIE GIFFORD, PRESIDENT AND CREATIVE DIRECTOR OF NAKEDCASHMERE

F O L D. Hangers can stretch

out the shoulders; it’s better to fold your sweater and keep it in a drawer.

MATT SCANLAN, COFOUNDER AND CEO OF NAADAM

S TO R E B E T W E E N S E A S O N S .

During the off season, put cashmere in an airtight container with cedar chips. The wood will help ward off moths and prevent mustiness.

64 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

TO BUY: Cashmere Ribbed Turtleneck, $195; naadam.co.

Photograph by Brian Henn

An Important Message from Medicare

“WE SAVED ON PRESCRIPTION COSTS. IT PAYS TO COMPARE PLANS.” MEDICARE PLANS CHANGE YEAR-TO-YEAR. Use the new Plan Finder at Medicare.gov to more easily compare: • Part D prescription plans for cost, coverage, and convenience. • Medicare Advantage Plans for extra benefits, changes in network providers, co-pays, and more. • Supplemental (Medigap) plans for costs and benefits.

Is your current plan still your best choice for 2020, or could you do better? Compare plans now. Use the new Plan Finder at Medicare.gov Or call 1-800-MEDICARE TTY 1-877-486-2048

Paid for by the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services

MEANINGFUL CONNECTIONS IN A MODERN WORLD

Feel at Ease in Every Seasonal Situation D O N’ T L E T YO U R N E RV E S S U C K T H E F U N O U T O F H O L I D AY M E R R I M E N T — F O L L O W T H I S S M A RT A DV I C E I N ST E A D.

STO C KSY

By Jennifer King Lindley

Photograph by Bonnin Studio

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

R E L AT I N G

Time to gather and make merry with your nearest and dearest. But also with your boss’s boss, opinionated relatives, and sugared-up children. Amid its joys, the season’s social whirl can bring lots of social anxiety, not the least of which is the all-too-common concern that everyone is judging us. “We fear that our weaknesses—in social skills, appearance, personality— will be obvious and that others will think less of us,” says Ellen Hendriksen, PhD, a clinical psychologist at Boston University’s Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders and the author of How to Be Yourself. The solution to this seasonal stress is not, alas, to find the closest dark corner and grab your phone for some self-soothing scrolling. It’s to remember that people are probably not worrying about you. (“They are probably thinking, ‘I hope they have those little canapés with prosciutto,’ ” says Amy Alkon, a science-based manners expert and the author of Unf*ckology: A Field Guide to Living with Guts and Confidence.) Then pull out these expert-backed tools if you need them. A H H H , T H E H O L I DAYS !

You’re an adult, yes. You know how to speak, sure. But walking into a room full of strangers (who of course seem to be having a great, easy time) can make your social skills suddenly disappear.

68 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

“Hosts used to make meaningful introductions as a matter of course, but now you have to ask,” says Alkon. “Say, ‘I’m excited to be here! I don’t know anyone yet. Who should I be sure to meet?’ ” Stay in the host’s line of sight throughout the evening so they can easily connect you with the fellow tuba player who just E N L I S T T H E H O S T.

S TA N D I N T H E S W E E T S P O T.

“The best place to position yourself to mingle is right at the exit of the drinks area,” says Van Edwards. Guests get their drinks and turn around to face a big room. “You will seem like a social savior.” (A natural opener here: “How’s the punch?”) SEEK OUT THE GOLDEND O ODLE.

“Honestly, recharging your batteries by playing with the host’s pet for a few minutes is awesome for some people,” says Aarons-Mele. “Finding a small child to chat with can be replenishing too.”

G E T T Y I M AG ES

You’re invited to a holiday open house where you only know the host.

Coming up with a party mission beforehand can help you feel less overwhelmed, says Vanessa Van Edwards, author of Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People. “It doesn’t have to be ‘Meet the love of my life.’ It could be ‘Speak to two new people’ or ‘See who I recognize from last year’s event and go over and say hello.’ ” Alkon keeps cool by imagining a party as a human safari. “The point is not to stay in your jeep,” she says. “Be curious. Go out and meet the new creatures.” When you’ve accomplished your goal, you have permission to leave without guilt. S E T A G OA L .

arrived. You can also offer to help keep the party running, suggests Morra Aarons-Mele, author of Hiding in the Bathroom: How to Get Out There When You’d Rather Stay Home. Refill the cooler, hang up coats. “When you have a job, it gets you focusing on something besides your own nerves,” she says. And you get to look busy while you scan the scene for friendly faces.

You have to deliver a toast, and all eyes will be on you. Public speaking is famously up there with death and spiders as something people fear most. Even this small moment in the spotlight can make your champagne flute tremble. Ad-libbed toasts are rarely an oratorical triumph. Write down the toast in advance. “ ‘Be bright, be brief, be seated’ is the rule of thumb for holiday toasts,” says Sharon Schweitzer, an international etiquette expert based in Austin, Texas. (Under a minute is typically a fine length for a holiday toast.) Consider the one thing you really want the recipient to hear or the listeners to take away, advises P R E PA R E .

public-speaking expert Andrea Sampson, cofounder of Talk Boutique, a speaker representation and coaching company in Toronto. Gratitude for the host’s efforts and for the people gathered is a surefire hit. And practice: “To calm your nerves, rehearse, rehearse, rehearse,” says Sampson. G I V E YO U R S E L F A R E A L I T Y

Cognitive behavioral therapists help patients reduce anxiety by teaching them to factcheck their fears. Try this before your toast (or work presentation or PTA speech): “First think through the worst that could happen,” says Hendriksen. As I stand up to CHECK.

speak, I spill my drink all over my dress, and everyone gasps in horror. Not great, but survivable. Now ask yourself what the odds are of that happening. Probably low. But if it does happen, how will you deal? I gesture for someone to give me a napkin and make a joke about how moved I must be by the occasion. Finally, consider what’s most likely to happen: I talk too fast at first or stumble on a word, but no one notices, and I settle in. “Thinking through these scenarios tames your irrational worries and makes you more confident,” says Hendriksen. “When we get nervous, our breathing becomes shallow. Before you go on, retreat to the bathroom and take several calmB R E AT H E .

R E L AT I N G

ing breaths,” says Sampson. Inhale deeply and hold for a count of six. Then open your mouth wide, as if you were a fire-breathing dragon, and push out the air to a count of six. K E E P A F R I E N D LY F O C U S . You don’t have to make eye contact with everyone in attendance (scary!). Gaze at the person you are speaking about—the host or guest of honor, says Van Edwards. You likely know them well, so their friendly face will steady you.

The office holiday party is tonight, and you’re thoroughly dreading it. Sure, it’s called a party, but it’s also work, says Annette Y. Harris, executive presence and personalbranding coach at ShowUp. And no, you can’t just skip it. “If you look good, you feel more confident,” says Harris. “Don’t wear something you would wear on a regular day at the office. Amp it up a bit.” Add a little sparkle or shine, a bold holiday color, a bit of bling. “A statement necklace or a snazzy bow tie or cuff links are wonderful,” says Harris. “They invite compliments, which is a great way to start a conversation.” DRESS FOR SUCCESS.

ther conversation, great. If not, move along with a cheery ‘It was nice to see you!’ ” It’s also gracious to engage the intern huddled awkwardly in the corner. Helping those even more nervous than you can make you feel more confident. “No one wants to talk about spreadsheets,” says Alkon. Keep the conversation friendly but not prying. “Ask, ‘What keeps you busy outside the office?’ ” suggests Fine. That way the other person can choose how much to share. Also safe fodder: the season itself. “Ask, ‘Do you have any favorite holiday traditions?’ ” says Van Edwards. “And have a couple of your own holiday stories in your back pocket ready to share.” D O N ’ T TA L K S H O P.

A L L O W T I M E - O U T S . Especially if you’re shy, take occasional breaks from schmoozing, says AaronsMele. “I might pretend I have a phone call. Then I go outside for fresh air or hide in the bathroom.” Of course, don’t relax by overindulging. “You wouldn’t get drunk at 10 a.m. at the office,” says Alkon, “so don’t do it at the office party.”

SOCIAL S I T UAT I O N C P R Here’s how to handle the holiday season’s smaller social emergencies. Hmm. Hug? Shake hands? When it’s unclear which greeting is expected, you can avoid confused fumbling by approaching the other person with your right hand already extended to shake. You bump into someone who knows you, but you can’t remember who they are. If you think your memory of the person might come flooding back, fish for more information: “It’s great to see you! Catch me up on your life.” Less risky is to just come clean: “I’m sorry, but I’m having a brain freeze. Can you please remind me of your name?” Someone gives you a gorgeous gift and you’re empty-handed. There is no rule that you have to reciprocate a gift. Just express your hearty thanks. Some socially savvy people keep a few small, wrapped gifts—diffusers, tea towels, wine, candles—ready for the unexpected, but don’t stress if you aren’t this prepared.

It’s tempting to cling to your next-door-cubicle buddy all evening. Resist. It’s perfectly OK to approach higher-ups and say hello, says Debra Fine, author of The Fine Art of Small Talk. “Smile at your boss’s boss and say, ‘Happy holidays. Wonderful party.’ Follow her lead. If she engages you in fur-

70 R E A L S I M P L E N OV E M B E R 2019

You feel awkward accepting a compliment. Do not say, “Ugh, I’m ashamed to be seen in this old thing!” That’s deflating to the compliment giver. Simply smile and say thank you.

G E T T Y I M AG ES

D O N ’ T S I L O YO U R S E L F.

insiders

R E L AT I N G

Good Read

The Power of a Book M E L I S S A H A R T R E A C H E D I N T O A L I T T L E F R E E L I B R A RY A N D F O U N D A S T O RY T H A T W O U L D C H A N G E H E R FA M I LY.

the Little Free Library the size of a dormitory refrigerator at the local playground, its shelves stuffed with novels and nonfiction, picture books and back issues of the New Yorker. It was one of more than 90,000 worldwide, part of a project that began in 2010 as one man’s labor of love to ensure all people had access to literature. As an author and reader, I desperately wanted a Little Free Library of my own. I loved the generosity of neighbors sharing books with one another on home-built shelves labeled with the motto “Take a book, return a book.” I wanted people walking by my house with their kids and their dogs to pause for a moment and peruse the shelves, hoping to discover something wonderful.

72 RE AL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

P R E A P P Y/ S T O C K S Y

FOR YEARS, I ENVIED

The author and her daughter browse their Little Free Library.

One Mother’s Day, my husband and I finally built our LFL—as they’re fondly nicknamed—from plywood and cast-off shingles and recycled casement windows. As soon as we mounted our library on a post under our giant cedar, our neighbor began stocking the lowest shelf with carefully curated chapter books for kids. She worked as a grade school teacher’s assistant and also knew about the foster care system from which I’d adopted my daughter. I trusted her taste in children’s literature, but I never suspected she’d add a book that would change my daughter’s life. the state, even if she’s just an infant, has already experienced more loss than most kids. In the womb, she might be exposed to drugs and alcohol and suffer a dearth of prenatal care. If her birth mother relinquishes her, she’s taken from the only body she’s known for nine months and placed in a crib instead of on a warm breast. She’s transferred to a foster parent, where she may stay for a year or so while the state determines a permanent placement. Lacking relatives to adopt her, and without interest from anyone else, she may find herself bounced among foster homes until she ages out of the system, usually at 18. My daughter spent the first 19 months of her life in foster homes, the second one run by a caregiver who managed the lives of four toddlers at once. The kids had regular pediatric and therapy appointments but didn’t receive much eye contact and physical affection, which are crucial to a child’s development of trust and security. Researchers have found that many foster kids’ brains contain a low volume of calming chemicals and higher levels of stress chemicals. A CHILD ADOPTED FROM

74 R E A L S I M P L E N O V E M B E R 2 0 1 9

of Bridge to Terabithia, the book responsible for making fifth and sixth graders everywhere weep. A year later, she published The Great Gilly Hopkins. My daughter and I curled up on the couch with our scruffy white terrier between us, and I began to read. Gilly Hopkins is mean, angry, and manipulative. She’s prejudiced against fat people, people with disabilities, and African Americans. She calls her beautiful teacher PAT E R S O N I S T H E AU T H O R

C O U R T E S Y O F J O N AT H A N B . S M I T H

Did I honestly think story time could help my depressed daughter? I did. Numerous studies have shown a correlation between fiction and increased empathy.

My daughter, in the early years of grade school, distrusted her teachers. She’d cry and hide under the desk, so traumatized by the daily six-hour loss of my husband and me that she couldn’t learn. She’d come home depressed and full of self-loathing, biting giant holes in her T-shirts and twisting her hair into knots. At last, when she entered third grade, I shifted my work schedule to evenings and weekends and began to homeschool her with a curriculum designed around kids’ novels. Initially, my neighbor slipped classics like Charlotte’s Web and Black Beauty and Ramona the Pest into our Little Free Library. When I told her about my homeschooling plans, she added contemporary fiction she’d come across in the classroom, stories that reflected themes from my daughter’s early life experiences. We read Bud, Not Buddy—Christopher Paul Curtis’s story of a Depression-era boy moving in and out of foster homes and searching for the musician he believes to be his father. We read The Tale of Despereaux, Kate DiCamillo’s Newbery Medal–winning tale of a noble mouse abandoned by his family. One day, we discovered Katherine Paterson’s novel The Great Gilly Hopkins. My daughter and I stood in the street, both of us raincoated against the misty March morning, and studied the book cover. A tough, ponytailed tween scowled up at us, one eyebrow arrogantly cocked. “She looks angry,” my daughter said, putting the book back on the shelf. I pulled it out again and read the back cover. “It’s about an 11-year-old who’s on her fourth foster home,” I said. “She’s on a mission to find her birth mother.” These days, when I read the jacket copy of a kids’ book and feel simultaneously intrigued and uncomfortable, I know it’s a novel I should read with my child. Back then, I had no such instinct. Metaphorically, I’d throw books at my daughter and hope one would stick. I gazed up into the cedar. On one branch, a squirrel nibbled a cone, and the detritus floated down and landed in my daughter’s curls. “I think we should read this book,” I said and carried it into the house.

C O U R T E S Y O F J O N AT H A N B . S M I T H

R E L AT I N G

the N-word, which has landed Paterson’s novel on numerous banned-book lists. I choked over that word myself, reading it to my mixedrace daughter. I winced at the scenes in which Gilly’s birth mother doesn’t seem interested in parenting. Most of us don’t consider the lives of the more than 400,000 foster children in the United States. We don’t have to. They’re a mostly hidden demographic, yet they exist in plain sight at school, in the library, on playgrounds. Decades ago, my mother gave me a paperback copy of The Pinballs. Written by Betsy Byars, it’s the story of three kids stuck in a home with career foster parents who get them to trust again. I knew, after I’d read the book until the cover fell off, that I wanted to grow up and adopt a child. My husband and I took the required parenting classes, pored over the Department of Human Services’ enormous binder of children available for adoption, and found ourselves the parents of a round-faced toddler with merry brown eyes and a wide, mischievous smile. But by first grade, that smile had faded, and her eyes had grown watchful and wary. Weekly meetings with her therapist turned into sullen, taciturn hours that exhausted everyone. Did I honestly think story time could help? I did. Over the past decade, numerous studies have shown a correlation between reading literary fiction and developing an increased capacity for empathy. Researchers have used R.J. Palacio’s Wonder and J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter series to show that reading about diverse protagonists expands our compassion for their real-life counterparts. The Great Gilly Hopkins is a wonderfully comedic novel despite its grim subject matter. The characters are funny and idiosyncratic. I developed a voice for each, and my daughter sat wide-eyed on the couch, soaking up my attempts at theater. But Gilly I played straight. Paterson shows that below the girl’s bullying, racist exterior, she’s raw with pain. “She’s sad,” my daughter told me one morning. “She doesn’t understand why her mother doesn’t want her.” Again, I cringed. My husband and I had always been candid with our daughter about her adoption story. Still, I wondered if Gilly’s struggles brought back memories of my child’s experiences in foster care. I needn’t have worried. The book continued to captivate, giving her the language to own her story without embarrassment or shame. “My birth mother couldn’t keep me, so I went to a foster home,” she told kids at dance

and art classes. “My parents found me there. They gave me a brownie and a cat named Eeyore.” She stopped chewing her T-shirts and knotting her hair. She demanded I read the last third of the book in one sitting. PAT E R S O N ’ S E N D I N G I S N ’ T happy—not at all ideal for readers like my daughter and me, who grew to care intensely about the anguished little girl. Gilly ends up with her genteel maternal grandmother—a stranger to her—and has to leave the foster mother with whom she’s formed a deep bond. When I read the final sentence, my child sat stone-faced with our terrier clutched in her arms. She picked up a volume of Garfield comics and began reading. “You might write to Katherine Paterson,” I suggested. “Tell her what you think of her book.” “I don’t want to,” she muttered. But later, she sat at her desk with her head bent over a piece of paper and her fingers curled around a pen. She wrote for an hour, laboriously, and folded the paper and put it in an envelope. “Please, Mumsie,” she said. “Will you send this to the author?” “I will,” I said, and went for a stamp. Later, in the post office, I unfolded the letter. In curlicue letters, she’d written:

Dear Katherine P., I read your book the Great Gilly Hopkins. I love it. It had so many details. I am 9, I also was a foster girl! I was moved two times. I was adopted at the age 19 months. P.S. PLEASE write book 2 of Gilly Hopkins.

ABOUT THE AU T H O R

This novel began a transformation, a way Melissa Hart is the for my daughter to understand and feel empaauthor of Better with Books: 500 Diverse thy for her own story. A year later, she returned Books to Ignite Empato a colorful and nurturing classroom. Now thy and Encourage she runs happily up the steps to her middle Self-Acceptance in Tweens and Teens school each morning. and the preteen novel My neighbor has moved. It’s my role now Avenging the Owl. She lives with her to study the kids on our street and stock our husband and daughLittle Free Library. ter in Oregon. “This one, Mom,” my daughter says. She hands me one of her beloved picture books for the toddler who stays with her grandmother down the street. This one for the second grader with a speech impairment. “And this one, and this one,” she says.

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

R E L AT I N G

The Tools

COZ Y B E D

Help alleviate aches and pains with a soft spot that warms to your cat’s body temperature. TO BUY: K&H Pet Products Thermo-Kitty Heated Cat Bed, from $45; amazon.com.

Pet Tricks HELP SENIOR PETS GET THE MOST OUT OF THEIR GOLDEN YE ARS. By Juno DeMelo H E AV Y L I F T E R

Increase Vet Visits

Most mammals—humans and pets alike—tend to gain fat and lose muscle as they age. But there’s no universal rule for tweaking pet food intake accordingly: Some animals need fewer calories and more protein and fiber; others may need the reverse. And the “senior” label on pet food has no legal definition, so it can mean different things depending on the brand. Bottom line: Talk to your vet at each checkup about health and behavioral concerns, including what and how much your pet is eating.

As they age, some pets may lose their sight or hearing, contract arthritis, or develop heart, kidney, or liver disease. Almost half of dogs over age 10 will develop cancer (less is known about the rate of cancer in cats). Pets can also develop cognitive dysfunction. Twice-yearly vet visits can help you detect early signs of certain diseases, many of which can be treated with a combination of prescription drugs, supplements, and lifestyle changes, such as making your cat’s litter box more accessible or providing a heated bed for your arthritic dog.

Ask the Tough Questions Whether to let go of a furry family member is a heartbreaking decision to make, but if your pet is seriously ill, an honest evaluation can help you and your vet determine if it’s time. Use an online quality-of-life scale that takes into account appetite, mobility, and pain; try the ones on lapoflove.com. (Have kids over age 5 participate in this conversation so they don’t feel blindsided by the decision.) If you choose to euthanize, ask your vet about at-home services, which can be more comfortable for a pet who’s struggling to move.

O U R E X P E RTS

Hoist your dog in and out of the car and up and down the stairs with this padded foam harness. TO BUY: Web Master Harness, $60; ruffwear.com.

ACC ESS I B L E BOW L S

Make mealtime more comfortable with elevated food and water dishes that help prevent neck strain. TO BUY: Pawfect Pets Elevated Dog & Cat Diner, from $30; chewy.com.

RAELYNN FARNSWORTH, DVM, CLINICAL ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR AT WASHINGTON STATE UNIVERSITY COLLEGE OF VETERINARY MEDICINE MARY GARDNER, DVM, COFOUNDER OF LAP OF LOVE VETERINARY HOSPICE IN JUPITER, FLORIDA DEBORAH LINDER, DVM, VETERINARY NUTRITIONIST AND RESEARCH ASSISTANT PROFESSOR AT CUMMINGS SCHOOL OF VETERINARY MEDICINE AT TUFTS UNIVERSITY

76 R E A L S I M P L E N O V E M B E R 2 0 1 9

Want to adopt a senior pet? Follow Susie’s Senior Dogs on Facebook or Instagram, or choose “senior” in the drop-down age menu on petfinder.com.

G E T T Y I M A G E S ; P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S

Monitor Their Diet

Murphy declares his freedom from grains.

Some dogs need a grain-free diet to be their best — and for that, there’s BLUE Freedom.®

BLUE Freedom is made with high-quality ingredients and real meat first — and none of the grains that contain gluten.

Love them like family. Feed them like family.® Available for dogs and cats at your favorite pet specialty store.

R E L AT I N G

Modern Manners R E A L S I M P L E ’ S E T I Q U E T T E E X P E R T, C AT H E R I N E N E W M A N , O F F E R S HER BEST ADVICE ON YO U R S O C I A L Q UA N DA R I E S.

F. P. A S K S …

My husband and I recently moved into a house with invasive next-door neighbors. We’re private people, but they bring their dog into our yard to play, sprinkle bread to attract birds to entertain the dog, and invite themselves over when we have dinner parties. They even put their 10-foot-long kayak in our yard without saying a word. When I sunbathe on the deck, she comes up my back staircase to see what I’m doing. We want space! What can I do?

78 RE AL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

I married into a wonderful family, and we have a great time together, but I’m often left out of work-related talk. I’m a stay-at-home mom, but I also own a small business and do freelance work. It hurts my feelings that nobody asks what I’m up to. Should I brush it off?

ABOUT C AT H E R I N E The author of One Mixed-Up Night, Catastrophic Happiness, and Waiting for Birdy, Catherine Newman has shared her wisdom on matters ranging from family and friends to happiness and pickling in numerous publications. She gets advice from her husband and two opinionated children in Amherst, Massachusetts.

Feeling invisible, even (or especially) around people you love, is the worst. It’s doubtless due to a kind of cluelessness, but old feminist that I am, I can’t help imagining that it’s related to your perceived role as (“just”) a mother. Start by asking your partner to help put your work life more prominently on the family’s radar. “Brag about me!” is, in my opinion, a totally reasonable request of a spouse. Plus, the family might not really understand what you do, and the more they know about it, the more they’ll know what to ask. Don’t be too shy to insert yourself into the discussion either. Look for analogous situations, funny anecdotes, and any other conversational segues that connect your work life to theirs.

I l l u s t r a t i o n s b y Yo c o N a g a m i y a

C AT H E R I N E N E W M A N I L L U S T R AT I O N B Y U L I K N Ö R Z E R

Your letter was beyond horrifying to my introverted family members, who offered uncharacteristically obnoxious advice. My husband suggested putting a For Sale sign on the kayak; my daughter thought you should claim an allergy to dogs and bread and also boats. The truth is, when other people want more friendship than we do, it’s almost impossible not to hurt them. But for your home to be your haven, you’ll need to break the pattern of your neighbors’ entitled presumption. “We so appreciate you making us feel like we’re part of the neighborhood!” you can say. “But we want to keep our own space more private.” If the request to respect your boundaries goes unheeded, I would consider building a sturdy fence between your yards—one without a gate.

S .G. A S K S …

D. K . A S K S …

My husband’s former colleague and his wife just had a baby, and they asked if we’d had our flu shots to determine if we could come over to meet the baby. Why do I feel so offended by this? Is it rude to ask this of visitors? They didn’t share that the baby or mother had any serious health risks. I am immunized for MMR and all the rest, but I skip the annual flu shot because I really hate needles. How do I even respond? These parents’ anxiety is not about you—it’s about keeping their baby safe. If you haven’t had a newborn recently or ever, it can be hard to grasp the upending worry new parents experience. And, honestly, it’s reasonable to worry about a baby getting the flu. There’s a risk the infant could become catastrophically ill. Your best bet, if you can’t bring yourself to get the shot (though doing so is a good move, for your health and the health of those you’re in close quarters with), might be to wait. “Send me photos!” you can say. Flu season will pass, and your friends will bring the baby out into the world. In the meantime, hold them in your compassionate heart.

E.K. ASKS…

My son is a wonderful, kind young man with a great job. Everything is going well, except since his recent engagement, he has put on 50 pounds. My husband and I worry a lot about his health. Diabetes and heart disease run on both sides of the family. His partner tries to cook healthy and exercise, and we try to bring up the subject without criticizing. We even gave him workout clothes for Christmas. He seems interested but never takes action. How can we help without seeming overbearing?

Grown children present a unique challenge: We love them as achingly as we did when they were tiny, but their lives are no longer ours to shape. So, while the known health risks are worrying, all you can do is share your family’s history with your wonderful, successful son and leave him to make his own best decisions. He’s aware of his weight, and he probably knows how you feel about it too. (Parental hints tend not to be as subtle as we imagine, alas.) There is also research to suggest that weight-related stigma or shame is itself a significant health risk. So leave the issue alone, and trust that the good self-care habits you instilled in him—which his partner appears to share—will help protect your great kid, whatever his weight or chosen indulgences.

H AV E A N E T I Q U E T T E Q U E S T I O N ? Submit your social conundrums to modernmanners@realsimple.com. Selected letters will be featured on these pages every month.

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

PACTOLA LAKE // BLACK HILLS NATIONAL FOREST

It’s undeniable. Spend a week exploring South Dakota and every one of your senses will agree: the state’s gorgeous landscapes, curious wildlife, fascinating history, and welcoming communities are equal parts inspiring and unique. Travelers will ﬁnd memorable experiences in every region. Start in the southeast corner, where you’ll enjoy natural beauty, homespun charm, cafés, and coffee shops. Enjoy more than 175 lakes and three major rivers—including the Missouri National Recreational River—in a region made for birding, ﬁshing, hiking, biking, and camping. Be sure to visit the striking, vertical quartzite cliffs at Palisades State Park before experiencing the shopping, local cuisine, and nightlife in Sioux Falls. From there, we suggest delving into the state’s proud indigenous culture.

Dignity Sculpture // Chamberlain

South Dakota’s rich cultural tapestry is woven together in large part by its Native American heritage. Nine tribal groups reside within the state, each with its own proud history and unique set of traditions. You can experience the culture ﬁrst-hand at any of the annual powwows, such as the Sisseton Wahpeton Wacipi or Black Hills Powwow. Also be sure to make a stop in Chamberlain, where you’ll want to capture a photo of Dignity: a 50-foot tall, stainless-steel sculpture representing the courage, perseverance, and wisdom of the Lakota and Dakota cultures. The western side of the state is where you’ll be treated to the Black Hills: a sprawling, 1.2 million acre national forest whose beauty always amazes. And with its abundance of easily accessible trails, you’re never far from a new adventure. If you’re in the mood for a cruise, popular drives like the Peter Norbeck Scenic Byway and Spearﬁsh Canyon Scenic Byway are absolutely stunning, while Custer State Park’s Wildlife Loop Road will bring you face-to-face with the park’s herd of 1,300 bison. For unique views of Mount Rushmore National Memorial, take a ride on the 17-mile long stretch known as Iron Mountain Road.

Palisades State Park // Garretson

Adventure in South Dakota and delight in the unexpected moments and breathtaking sights. Start planning your journey to the land of Great Faces and Great Places with a free Vacation Guide. Download it today at TravelSouthDakota.com

TravelSouthDakota.com // 800-732-5682

Mount Rushmore National Memorial

R E L AT I N G

5 Ways to Pull Great Stories Out of Your Family B R E A K T H RO U G H T H E S M A L L TA L K A N D C O N N E C T W I T H L OV E D O N E S O N A D E E P E R L E V E L T H I S H O L I D AY S E A S O N . By Hannah Chenoweth

82 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Photograph by Guille Faingold

Let them teach you something.

Prioritize your family history.

Show a genuine curiosity in your relatives’ passions. If your cousin is always playing Fornite, don’t say, “Oh, there you are playing that video game again!” Ask her how it works. Kids especially love to teach adults, and they open up when you engage in an activity side by side; it’s less intimidating than a face-to-face discussion. Everyone wants to be seen as an expert in something, whether it’s a toddler in the alphabet or a preteen in gaming. Offer that chance. AMANDA MILLER LITTLEJOHN IS A PERSONAL-BRANDING CONSULTANT, THE FOUNDER OF PACKAGE YOUR GENIUS ACADEMY, AND THE AUTHOR OF PACKAGE YOUR GENIUS. SHE LIVES IN WASHINGTON, D.C.

My father was a Holocaust survivor who passed away when I was 19, and there’s so much I wish I had asked him about our heritage. It’s important to ask questions while you can, and holiday gatherings are the perfect opportunity to do so. You can interview your relatives and record their answers. Or request that each person bring a few old photos, and ask them to tell you about the people in the photos. You may be surprised by how vividly your older family members recall their younger years. One casual way for meaningful conversations to unfold: Ask couples how they met. Everyone loves to both hear and tell those stories. JOEY KORN IS A WRITER WHO COAUTHORED HIS LATE FATHER’S BOOK, ABE’S STORY: A HOLOCAUST MEMOIR. HE LIVES IN GROVETOWN, GEORGIA.

Toss out some prompts.

Make it playful.

STO C KSY

Play can help bridge the gap between generations. Put a piece of family trivia at each place setting (“Who had a yellow Volkswagen in high school?” “Who spent a month backpacking in Asia?”) and have guests try to match it with the correct relative. My family also loves what we call Typewriter Tales: Everyone takes turns writing one sentence of a story on an old typewriter throughout the day. The final story is always hilarious; each person’s unique humor gets a chance to shine. Playful activities work wonders helping people of all ages relax and connect on a new level. MEREDITH SINCLAIR IS A FAMILY LIFESTYLE EXPERT AND THE AUTHOR OF WELL PLAYED: THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO AWAKENING YOUR FAMILY’S PLAYFUL SPIRIT. SHE LIVES IN LOS ANGELES.

At the Moth, we hold open mic events where participants tell stories based on prompts, which are also great for generating sharing at the holidays. Going around the table to answer a prompt can pull people out of their shells and prevent one person from dominating the conversation. Some to consider: “Tell us about a time you couldn’t believe your eyes.” “Tell us about when you bit off more than you could chew.” “Tell us about a bond in your life that was unbreakable.” You can also encourage family members to come up with their own ideas. The options to get the stories flowing are endless, and you never know what you’ll learn. JODI POWELL IS A PRODUCER AT THE MOTH, A NONPROFIT GROUP BASED IN NEW YORK CITY DEDICATED TO THE ART AND CRAFT OF STORYTELLING.

Talk less, listen more. Opening up interesting conversations is simpler than people think: Just listen! Talking to an active listener is so powerful, especially when they ask good questions. A typical phone call with my grandfather in Iran would be a quick hi-and-bye if I didn’t ask things like “What’s new with those neighbors who used to always give me chocolate?” I also try to connect the conversation to stories he’s told me earlier (“Oh, so now I understand why you love the beach so much!”). Show the other person that you’re truly paying attention—that you care and want to hear more. OMID SCHEYBANI IS A PHOTOGRAPHER, WRITER, AND WORLD CULTURE STORYTELLER. HE IS CURRENTLY TRAVELING THROUGH CHINA.

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

Healthy. Beautiful. Home.

20% OFF WITH CODE REALSIMPLE20 Ends 12/31/19 New customers only.

Get ready for Summer with planet-friendly Real Simple Clean. A range of obsessively crafted solutions to help with every household chore, all enriched with essential oils and guaranteed cruelty-free. Visit realsimpleclean.com Tune-in this summer on Evine / Find your local channel at evine.com/channelfinder

Real Simple Clean— coming soon to Evine, an ultra-fun digital retailer offering unique products to viewers in 87 million homes nationwide.

W O R K , M O N E Y, A N D H E A L T H ADVICE FOR BUSY PEOPLE

The Complete Guide to Tipping W H E N T O T I P, W H E N T O S K I P, AND HOW MUCH TO G I V E I N E V E RY S I T U A T I O N

P R O P ST Y L I N G BY M EG A N K I A N TO S

B y J u l i e Va d n a l

Photographs by Corey Olsen

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

BAL ANCE

At a hotel Instead of giving a large amount at the end of your stay, leave about $2 or $3 a day for housekeeping, says Nicolas Graf, PhD, associate dean at the Jonathan M. Tisch Center of Hospitality at New York University. “In most hotels, the housekeeper who cleans your room one day is not necessarily the same one the following day,” he says. “To be fair, tip every day.” Traveling with kids or pets? Consider leaving a couple of dollars more.

TIPPING IS LIKE

blockchain and Brexit: important, but super confusing. It used to be about showing appreciation for good service, but as minimum wage has plateaued (federal minimum wage is $7.25), workers have come to depend on it. What’s more, only seven states require tipped workers to be paid minimum wage before tips; in other states, their wages start at $2.13 an hour. So how do you make sure people are properly compensated, especially when most service-industry workers depend on gratuity? Consider this your tipping handbook. (You’re on your own with blockchain, though.)

At a hair or nail salon

THE DEFINITES At a restaurant Tipping between 15 percent (for average service) and 20 percent (for very good service) is suggested, says Robin DiPietro, PhD, professor and program director at the University of South Carolina’s College of Hospitality, Retail and Sport Management. Regardless of the level of service, gratuity at a restaurant is nonnegotiable.

At a bar D I N I N G I N A G RO U P ? Some restaurants don’t allow separate checks. Make sure people leaving cash include tip. Anyone paying with a credit card should tip on their portion of the total bill, not the lesser amount shown on their credit card receipt, which has the cash portion taken out, says Graf.

Leave $1 for a beer and $2 for a cocktail, advises Salvatore Tafuri, bar director of the Times Square Edition Hotel in New York City. If you order a bar snack or the service was especially good, tip 20 percent.

For a babysitter or nanny Even though you’ve probably already agreed on an hourly rate with your sitter, rounding up the total (say, from $45 to a solid $50) is a nice gesture, especially on hectic days or on nights that involve cooking for your crew. For a regular nanny, show your appreciation at the end of the year with a bonus of one or two weeks’ pay or a gift equivalent to that amount.

In a taxi or rideshare The general rule is 15 to 20 percent per taxi ride, which usually equates to a dollar or two. For rideshares like Uber and Lyft, tip at least $2 per ride, says Jonathan Cousar, a former Uber driver and the director of outreach at Ridester, an online resource for rideshare drivers.

88 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Fifteen percent is the going rate at most salons. Keep in mind that many require you to tip in cash. If you’re low on bills or need to tip multiple people (like at a hair salon, where the shampoo person and blowout stylist also expect a few dollars), ask if you can send your tips over a money-sharing app, like Venmo.

T I P P I N G O N TA X Etiquette experts say tipping pretax on a restaurant check is usually fine— there’s no point in tipping on part of the bill that’s not going to the server or restaurant, right? Then again, says Graf, servers could see it as a cheapskate move. If you can afford it, it’s kind to tip on the total with tax.

At coat check The general rule is $1 per coat and $2 for a larger bag. Some venues charge for checked items, but you should still tip, says DiPietro. If you’re stuck without cash, Graf suggests you apologize to the coat check person, then make up for it the next time you’re there.

T H E G R AY A R E A S For food delivery Most delivery apps let you tip in the app, so you can add your 15 to 20 percent that way, says Graf. (Just remember that a delivery fee is not the same as a tip.) And some

apps, like Postmates, which uses a cashless tipping system, give you the option to add more gratuity after your delivery arrives. That said, a lot of drivers prefer cold, hard, untaxable cash. A fair amount is $3 to $5 per delivery, says Julia Esteve Boyd, an etiquette consultant in Lausanne, Switzerland. Stash an envelope of bills near your front door so you’re always ready when food arrives. Raining or snowing? Consider tipping a few extra dollars. Bigger orders, like for an office get-together or a family party, will often include gratuity. Check the receipt before you hand a delivery person anything more.

At a coffee shop Rounding up to the nearest dollar on your coffee run is not necessary but is a nice gesture, especially if you’re a regular or a barista has gone out of their way to make your visit special. “If they’ve really splashed out on the latte art or given you a great recommendation for walking around the neighborhood, go ahead and make it at least 20 percent,” says Emilio Baltodano, founder of Eleva Coffee in Brooklyn, New York.

4,305 lb *

THE AVERAGE AMOUNT OF LAUNDRY A FAMILY DOES EACH YEAR

ARM & HAMMER™ Plus OxiClean™ with Odor Blasters™ attacks stains and eliminates tough odors like body odor, musty towels, and sweat in every load because every wash counts. *Based on average of 4.6 loads/week and 18 lb washer capacity.

KEEP OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN.

BAL ANCE

Package-delivery people

T H E D O - N OT-T I P ZONES Teachers Cash from individual students or parents is typically not allowed, but check with the school for guidelines on a class gift, like a gift card to a restaurant or spa, says Boyd. Also ask about rules on value. In Massachusetts, for instance, public employees can’t accept gifts worth over $50.

Medical professionals (nurses, doctors, therapists) Many are prohibited from accepting money and gifts. Show your appreciation verbally, or write a heartfelt card to express what their care meant to you.

No need to tip when they drop off your package. There’s only one situation in which you might: “If it’s regularly the same person and you see that person often, I think it’s a nice gesture to tip something around the holidays,” says Graf.

Camp counselors and sports coaches Joining with the other parents to give one big gift—like a personalized jersey or trophy—is a perfectly acceptable gesture at the end of the season. Just make sure that every player’s or camper’s parents are asked to contribute and that it’s clear the gift is from everyone.

Employees Giving cash is inappropriate in a workplace, says Boyd. Thank employees for their hard work with a small present or a gift card.

TIPPING DILEMMAS You’re not satisfied with the service. Maybe your stylist cut a few more inches than you asked for or your server brought out the wrong entrée (twice). Speak up—but don’t stiff them on a tip. “Let them know you’re not happy, but remember that anybody can make a mistake,” says Boyd. It’s fine to tip less than you normally would, even as little as 10 percent (but no less).

The waiter is hovering over the iPad. It’s OK to ask for a little privacy before you punch in any numbers. “Just say, ‘Thank you. I’ll give it back to you shortly,’ ” says Boyd.

A restaurant is no-tipping. Pay in compliments. Ask to see a manager and share what you loved most about your server. In the service industry, repeated positive feedback can often lead to preferable shifts or a promotion into management.

The person you’re with tips poorly. The sad truth is that not everyone is a fair tipper. Speak up with a “I’m happy to contribute a little extra to the tip—our waiter was so on top of it.” If speaking up isn’t an option (you’re with your boss, say) and you want to make sure your server gets paid fairly, excuse yourself to the restroom and discreetly hand the server your cash.

90 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Celebrate Autumn Delight in the splendor of the season with a bountiful bouquet.

20% OFF WITH CODE FALLRS20 ENDS 12.31.19 While supplies last.

EXCLUSIVE AUTUMN MEDLEY TM BY REAL SIMPLE ®

1 8 0 0 F LO W E R S.C O M / R E A L S I M P L E

Give Care, Get Cared For. Our selection of high-quality products and greater value gives caregivers back time to better care for their loved one and themselves. From trusted Depend® to Poise®, the #1 brand for bladder leaks, to a superior clean* with Cottonelle® Flushable Wipes.

As a caregiver, I know how difficult it was for me to hang up my super hero cape for a while. So often, I forgot to take care of myself…even caregivers with superpowers deserve to take some much needed time and space for selflove and care. —Costco Member, Susanne White of Caregiver Warrior™

Get everything you need for the one you love at Costco.

*Using dry + moist together vs. dry alone. ®/TM Trademarks of Kimberly-Clark Worldwide, Inc. or its afﬁliates. © KCWW

Available at a Costco Warehouse near you and on Costco.com

BAL ANCE

M a k i n g I t Wo r k

What’s your biggest childcare challenge, and how do you tackle it? By Rachel Schallom

I work irregular hours and my husband’s job is more flexible, so he often steps in to help with childcare. When he can’t, I find it helpful to set conditions with work as early as possible. For instance, if my job requires me to stay late but I have to get my son to school, I’ll say yes but establish a hard out at a specific time. This lets me avoid saying no while giving my employer the option to ask someone else if my restrictions don’t work.

I work from home, so finding my son consistent care was important. Once we got him into daycare, we thought everything would be easier, but he was sick constantly the first few months. We used Care.com to find help on an as-needed basis for the days he wasn’t feeling well enough for daycare, which was a huge help. I make sure to keep daily instructions somewhere accessible and always have an extra childcare bag packed with the essentials in case plans change.

BRYAN PETERS, 42, PROJECT AUTOMATION ENGINEER IN WINSTON-SALEM, NORTH CAROLINA

JANAI NORMAN, 30, ANCHOR AND CORRESPONDENT FOR ABC NEWS IN NEW YORK CITY

KATHRYN SNELLEN, 30, OWNER OF KES STUDIO, A MARKETING FIRM IN KANSAS CITY, MISSOURI

94 RE AL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Our kids are 5 and 11. Dropping them off and picking them up at two different locations can be incredibly challenging and often results in less-than-desirable dinnertimes. One of my partner’s and my saving graces is a shared weekly grocery and meal-planning list. We track our dinner menu, grocery list, and household to-dos. The grocery list even has emoji so our 5-year-old can help find things at the store.

KACIE MILLER, 37, BUSINESS ANALYST IN LYNCHBURG, VIRGINIA

MATT E. POLEOS, 40, DIRECTOR OF TRAINING AT HUEY MAGOO’S, A RESTAURANT IN LAKE MARY, FLORIDA

Illustration by Andrea Mongia

H E A D S H OTS C O U RT ESY O F SU BJ ECTS

I’m a divorced dad of two, and my biggest childcare challenge is navigating the life of coparenting. I try to find a balance between getting my time with the kids and respecting their need to be with their mom, even when it conflicts with plans I’ve made with them. It’s been hard to not take it personally, but giving up time has actually made my relationship with the kids stronger. I’ve seen how much they want a voice and how much it means to them to be heard.

We downsized our budget and saved enough money to let my wife take a break from work and care for our toddler and preschooler instead of sending them to daycare. We previously had two cars and now share a slightly used minivan. Sharing one car to keep our expenses low is tough, but we enjoy lots of laughs together on those rides home. If we had to do it over, I would start earlier and put money in an account that could gain interest during the years before Florida’s free pre-K program starts.

BAL ANCE

to think that in a health emergency—a man at the next table starts choking on his sushi, a woman in the elevator goes into labor—you’d swoop in like a superhero, giving aid until the EMTs arrive. But your first reaction may actually be, “I was an English/music/accounting major! What do I know about medicine?” “Anyone can step in and help out. You just need the willingness and confidence to do it,” says Jonathan Epstein, a paramedic and the senior director of science, industry, and government relations for American Red Cross Training Services. Many people are hesitant to help, Epstein points out, because they’re afraid of being sued or of accidentally doing something to make the situation worse. “Good Samaritan laws in all 50 states help protect you even if you make a simple mistake, as long as you’re acting with good intentions,” he says. At the very least, call 911 immediately and make sure the person is in a safe position. With some extra knowledge, you can make a big difference, and in many cases even save a life. Here’s what to know in six emergency situations so you can take confident action. I T WO U L D B E N I C E

6 Health Skills You’ll Be Glad to Have T H E R E’S N O SU B ST I T U T E FO R A M E D I C A L P RO F E SS I O N A L, B U T I F YO U ’R E F I R ST O N T H E S C E N E, S O M E BA S I C K N O W L E D G E C A N H E L P Y O U S A V E T H E D AY. By Marisa Cohen

Illustrations by Jasu Hu

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

BAL ANCE

type of burn is a full-thickness (third-degree) burn, which can appear white and waxy or black and charred. “The center of this burn won’t hurt, because you’ve burned away all the nerve endings,” explains Epstein. “However, the outer edges, which will have first- or second-degree burns, can be very painful.” If you get one of these, call 911 or go to an emergency room immediately. 1

Treat a burn. Most burns that happen in the home result from mundane situations (you forgot to put on an oven mitt before grabbing that pan of lasagna), and you can treat them yourself. But depending on the severity and size, some burns need immediate medical care.

S T O P T H E B U R N I N G P RO C E S S

by holding the wound under cold, running water for 10 minutes, says Epstein. “If you’re outdoors and there’s no running water, you can pour cool water onto a clean cloth and hold that to the burn,” he says. Do not place ice directly on the burn, as it can freeze and damage the skin cells.

ONCE THE BURN HAS CO OLED O F F, C OV E R I T L O O S E LY W I T H

(Skip adhesive bandages, which can stick to the damaged skin.) Do not pop any blisters—the skin underneath needs to heal to prevent infection. C L E A N G AU Z E .

Applying antibiotic ointment or petroleum jelly will feel good and help with healing. Steer clear of home remedies like butter or toothpaste, despite what your grandmother may have told you. K E E P I T M O I S T.

ASSESS THE SEVERITY OF

If the area is red and painful but there’s no broken skin or blistering, it’s a superficial (or first-degree) burn and can be treated at home. If there are blisters or broken skin, it’s most likely a partial-thickness (seconddegree) burn. This type can sometimes be treated at home, “but if there’s a large blister or the burn is on the hands, face, or throat, get medical treatment right away,” says Epstein. The most serious THE BURN.

Save someone who’s overdosed on opioids. Every day, about 130 Americans die from opioids, which include prescription painkillers and street drugs like heroin and fentanyl. Thankfully, naloxone—the opioid-overdose reversal drug—is now widely available, is covered by most insurance plans, and can even be bought at many drugstores out of pocket without a prescription, says Patricia Aussem, director of clinical content at the Center on Addiction in New York City. If you live in an area with an opioid problem or know someone struggling with addiction, keep a dose on hand and follow these steps. If someone is barely breathing and has blue lips and fingertips, rub your fist hard under their nose or along their breastbone, says Aussem. If there’s no reaction—and especially if there’s labored breathing, choking sounds, and a slow or absent pulse—call 911 ASAP. If you must step away for a moment, roll the person onto their side, put their head on their arm, and bend their top knee. This helps prevent them from choking if they vomit. IDENTIF Y THE SIGNS.

One formulation, Narcan, is a nasal spray: Hold the device in the person’s nostril and press the plunger. Evzio is like an EpiPen: Pull off the seal, place it on the thigh, press down, and hold for five seconds. A D M I N I S T E R N A L OXO N E .

The benefits of naloxone last from 30 to 90 minutes, so the person can stop breathing again once the naloxone wears off, without further aid. G E T M O R E H E L P.

98 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Help a friend facing a mental health crisis. If a friend has withdrawn socially (from everyone, not just you); is showing signs of self-neglect (skipping showers, dressing in dirty clothes, gaining or losing a lot of weight quickly); seems irritated or angry, even about minor things; or has suddenly started leaving unusual posts on social media, they may be in a mental health crisis, says Elena Mikalsen, PhD, chief of psychology at the Children’s Hospital of San Antonio. Here’s how to help: 3

T RY T O G E T T H E M O U T O F T H E H O U S E . “Call and say, ‘I miss you. I’m going to pick you up so we can get coffee or take a walk,’ ” says Mikalsen. “A rut of staying in bed and not exercising or socializing can lead to a downward spiral.”

Don’t drag them to a party. A one-on-one somewhere you can sit quietly and talk is best. KEEP IT SIMPLE.

Save someone who’s choking. D O N ’ T T RY T O F I X T H E D E P R E S A LWAY S A S K , “A R E YO U C H O K I N G ? ” If the person can speak or cough, encourage them to keep trying to cough up the obstruction. If they are making high-pitched noises, coughing weakly, or unable to speak or cry, have someone call 911 while you jump into action.

Stand to the side of and slightly behind the person. (If it’s a child, kneel.) Place an arm across their chest for support, bend them over at the waist, and firmly hit between the shoulder blades with the heel of your hand five times. S TA RT W I T H B A C K B L O W S .

S I O N . “The best thing you can do is just listen and be empathetic,” says Mikalsen. If applicable, mention a time when you needed help: “A couple of years ago, I was totally overwhelmed, and talking to a therapist really helped.” OFFER TO HELP WITH TO-D OS.

Stand behind the person with one foot in front of the other. If possible, place your front foot between their feet. Wrap your arms around their waist. Put one fist just above the belly button, grab your fist with your other hand, and thrust in and up strongly five times. (If the person is pregnant or too large to reach around, give chest thrusts against the center of the breastbone.) Switch between five thrusts and five back blows until the person can cough forcefully, speak, cry, or breathe, or if they become unresponsive. T H E N T RY A B D O M I N A L T H RU S T S .

dial 911 or use the emergency call button on your phone. “The EMTs will find you even if you can’t speak,” says Epstein. You can lean over the back of a chair and use it to give yourself abdominal or chest thrusts. I F YO U ’ R E C H O K I N G A N D A L O N E ,

“When you’re depressed, you don’t feel like you can handle anything in your life,” says Mikalsen. “Ask, ‘Can I help run errands for you? What’s the most overwhelming thing you have to do today?’ ” You can even ask, “Can I help you find a therapist who takes your insurance?” WAT C H O U T F O R S U I C I DA L

If your friend states, online or verbally, that they’re thinking of ending their life or expresses anything similarly alarming, offer to take them to the ER or a mental health clinic, or tell someone they live with. THOUGHTS.

L E A R N T O S AV E A L I F E I N O N E DAY You’ve seen those red AED (automated external defibrillator) boxes everywhere, but would you know how to use it if someone went into cardiac arrest? Grab a friend and sign up for a Red Cross class to learn how. In one five-hour session, you can get certified in adult and child CPR and AED (if you’re short on time, you can take part of the class online). While you’re at it, download the free Red Cross First Aid app for expert advice on treating everything from a broken arm to a jellyfish sting.

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

BAL ANCE

A stroke interrupts the flow of oxygen to the brain, which can make communication difficult. Speech might be garbled, or the person may not be able to form or repeat a simple sentence. S P E E C H D I F F I C U LT Y:

Recognize a stroke. If a friend, coworker, or parent suddenly starts acting or speaking oddly—their face droops, their speech is slurred—get help right away. They may be having a stroke, and the faster you get them to the hospital for proper treatment, the better their chance of a full recovery. “The clock starts ticking the moment the symptoms appear,” says Stacey Rosen, MD, a cardiologist and volunteer medical expert for the American Heart Association’s Go Red for Women movement. She recommends keeping in mind the tips in the acronym FAST (facial drooping, arm weakness, speech difficulty, time to call 911):

K N O W O T H E R S Y M P T O M S T O O.

“The symptoms can be more subtle in women than in men, but most women have an amazing sense that something is just not right,” says Rosen. Pay close attention to unusual symptoms, like sudden nausea and vomiting; an unexplained, debilitating headache; blurred vision; dizziness or trouble balancing; pain or pressure on one side of the body; or even hiccups that won’t go away.

T I M E T O C A L L 9 1 1 : When you get to the ER, don’t worry about bothering anyone with a potential false alarm. “This is not the time to be a good girl and let someone else go first,” says Rosen. “You need to scream to everyone who’s listening, ‘I think I’m having a stroke!’ ”

FA C I A L D RO O P I N G, T I N G L I N G,

“Ask the person to try to smile at you. Or if you’re alone and think you’re having a stroke, smile in the mirror,” says Rosen. If the smile is lopsided, that’s cause for concern. OR NUMBNESS:

“Many of my patients tell me they dropped a pen or were holding a utensil and it suddenly felt very strange,” says Rosen. ARM WEAKNESS:

Catch a baby who’s coming out fast. Unexpected births are rare but can happen. These deliveries can usually be handled by a friend, family member, or bystander, says Sharon L. Ryan, director of midwifery practice, education, and global outreach at the American College of Nurse-Midwives. Call 911, but if the baby is faster than the EMTs, wash your hands, find clean towels or blankets for the little one to land on, and then: “The calmer the mother is, the smoother the birth will be,” says Ryan. Have her lie on her side, which will help slow the baby’s descent, and encourage her to take quick, panting breaths for as long as possible, rather than bearing down. REMAIN CALM.

W H E N T H E B A BY S TA RT S C RO W N I N G,

simply support the baby’s head and

body as it comes out, says Ryan. gently wipe the nose and face with something clean. Place the baby naked on the mom’s bare chest, then cover both with a blanket. O N C E T H E B A BY I S O U T,

D ON’T CUT THE CORD!

100 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

The experts should do it safely, with sterile tools.

Beautifully designed. Unbelievably soft. More comfortable.* More women agree NEW Depend® FIT-FLEX® Underwear protects and ﬁts better* so you can be your best self.

GET A FREE SAMPLE AT DEPEND.COM

DO YOU LIKE SAVING MONEY? Get GEICO.

geico.com | 1-800-947-AUTO (2886) | Local Agent Some discounts, coverages, payment plans and features are not available in all states, in all GEICO companies, or in all situations. Boat and PWC coverages are underwritten by GEICO Marine Insurance Company. Motorcycle and ATV coverages are underwritten by GEICO Indemnity Company. Homeowners, renters and condo coverages are written through non-afﬁliated insurance companies and are secured through the GEICO Insurance Agency. GEICO is a registered service mark of Government Employees Insurance Company, Washington, D.C. 20076; a Berkshire Hathaway Inc. subsidiary. GEICO Gecko image © 1999-2019. © 2019 GEICO

Ahhh... When you’re about to step into a situation where you’ll feel anxious—like giving a presentation at work or having a tough conversation with your partner—you can literally shake off some of that negative energy. Try this technique, which you can even do in public. Bring your palms together and rub them vigorously for two or three deep breaths; connecting the two sides of your body can make you feel more balanced. Next, shake your hands as if you’ve just washed them and don’t have a towel to dry them with. This simple practice is yoga’s best-kept secret to recalibrate the mind-body connection and instantly feel more grounded.

OFFSET

—JE SSIC A LIN, jessalinrose.com

Photograph by Jelana Jovanovic

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

103

Thanksgiving

S ecrets E ve r y C o o k Should Know Our food editors return to these simple strategies year after year to make classic holiday dishes sing.

By D a w n P e r r y Photographs by A n n a W i l l i a m s

NO-BA STE ROA ST TURKE Y

The Secret to… Juicy Turkey Use a dry brine to add flavor, and roast the bird in pieces for faster, more even cooking.

No-Baste Roast Turkey

F O O D S T Y L I N G B Y C H R I S L A N I E R ; P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y S A R A H S M A R T. P R E V I O U S S P R E A D : D I N N E R P L AT E S , $ 7 0 E A C H ; D B O H O M E . C O M . O M B R E N A P K I N I N N U D E , $ 2 5 : A B C H O M E . C O M . O P P O S I T E PA G E : O VA L C E R A M I C P L AT T E R , F R O M $ 2 4 0 ; C L A M L A B . C O M F O R S I M I L A R . C L O V E N A P K I N I N P L A I D , $ 2 3 F O R 4 ; S U S TA I N A B L E T H R E A D S . C O M . B L U E B O W L , $ 1 7 5 ; H E N R Y S T R E E T S T U D I O . C O M

ACTIVE TIME 35 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 10 HOURS, 50 MINUTES (INCLUDES 8 HOURS CHILLING) SERVES 8 TO 10 (WITH LEFTOVERS)

1 12- to 14-lb. whole turkey, cut into 8 pieces (ask the butcher to do it) 1/4 cup kosher salt 3 Tbsp. light brown sugar 1 tsp. paprika 8 stalks celery 4 medium carrots, halved lengthwise 2 large yellow onions, cut into wedges

The Secret to… Crispy Sprouts

1/2 bunch fresh thyme sprigs 4 Tbsp. unsalted butter, melted 2 wire racks inside 2 rimmed baking sheets. Divide turkey pieces evenly between racks. Stir together salt, sugar, and paprika in a small bowl, using your fingers to ensure sugar is fully incorporated. Sprinkle mixture evenly over turkey pieces. Refrigerate, uncovered, at least overnight and up to 24 hours.

Cook, cut sides down, on already hot baking sheets for the best browning.

PLACE

CRISPY BRUSSEL S SPROUTS WITH PANCET TA AND LEMON

turkey from refrigerator; let stand at room temperature for 1 hour. REMOVE

preheat oven to 375°F with racks in upper and lower thirds. Lift racks with turkey pieces off baking sheets; pat turkey dry with paper towels (do not rinse) and arrange, skin side up, on racks again. Pour off and discard any liquid from baking sheets and wipe dry. Divide celery, carrots, onions, and thyme between baking sheets. Set racks with turkey inside baking sheets again and brush turkey evenly with butter. MEANWHILE,

turkey until a thermometer inserted in thickest portion of breasts and thighs (without touching bone) registers 165°F, 60 to 70 minutes, rotating baking sheets from top to bottom halfway through. Remove baking sheets from oven and let turkey rest on wire racks, tented with foil, at least 15 minutes and up to 2 hours. Reserve baking sheets with vegetables and drippings for making gravy (see recipe, page 108). Slice turkey as desired and serve. ROAST

Crispy Brussels Sprouts with Pancetta and Lemon ACTIVE TIME 15 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 35 MINUTES SERVES 8

2 lb. Brussels sprouts 6 Tbsp. olive oil 4 oz. pancetta, cut into 1/4-in. cubes 2 tsp. kosher salt 1/2 tsp. freshly ground black pepper 1 tsp. lemon zest (from 1 lemon)

Meanwhile, add oil, pancetta, salt, and pepper to Brussels sprouts in bowl; toss to coat. hot baking sheets on a heatproof surface; divide Brussels sprouts mixture (including oil) evenly between them, carefully placing as many Brussels sprouts cut sides down as possible. Return baking sheets to oven; roast for 10 minutes. Rotate baking sheets from top to bottom; continue roasting until Brussels sprouts are deeply browned and leaves are browned and crispy, 6 to 8 minutes. PLACE

Brussels sprouts from oven; sprinkle evenly with lemon zest and serve immediately. (To make ahead, let roasted Brussels sprouts stand, undisturbed, on baking sheets for up to 2 hours. Reheat at 350°F until crispy, 5 to 7 minutes, then garnish with lemon zest.) REMOVE

oven to 425°F with racks in upper and lower thirds. Trim Brussels sprouts and halve lengthwise, pulling off and reserving any loose outer leaves. Transfer Brussels sprouts and leaves to a large bowl. PREHEAT

2 rimmed baking sheets in preheated oven on upper and lower racks; let heat until hot, about 5 minutes. PLACE

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

107

Golden Gravy ACTIVE TIME 20 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 40 MINUTES MAKES 31/4 CUPS

Reserved baking sheets with vegetables and drippings from No-Baste Roast Turkey (page 107)

LUSCIOUS MA SHED P OTATOES AND GOLDEN GR AV Y

3 cups chicken broth, divided 3 Tbsp. cornstarch 2 Tbsp. unsalted butter 1 tsp. apple cider vinegar 1/4 tsp. kosher salt 1/4 tsp. freshly ground black pepper

The Secret to… Creamy Potatoes Bake buttery Yukon Golds in salt to intensify flavor, then pass them through a ricer for a smooth texture.

Luscious Mashed Potatoes ACTIVE TIME 30 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 1 HOUR, 50 MINUTES SERVES 10

2 cups plus 4 tsp. kosher salt, divided 4 lb. Yukon Gold potatoes, scrubbed 1 cup heavy cream 1 cup whole milk 1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter 2 fresh rosemary sprigs 1 bay leaf 1/4 tsp. freshly ground black pepper, plus more for serving

toes evenly on salt. Bake until tender, 50 to 60 minutes. Remove from oven; let stand until cool enough to handle, about 30 minutes. potatoes; transfer to a ricer and press into a large bowl, or use a potato masher. (To make ahead, let potatoes stand, covered, at room temperature for up to 6 hours.) PEEL

together cream, milk, butter, rosemary, bay leaf, pepper, and remaining 4 teaspoons salt in a medium saucepan. Bring to a bare simmer over medium-low; cook, undisturbed, until butter melts. Remove from heat; let stand, stirring occasionally, for 10 minutes. Remove and discard rosemary and bay leaf. STIR

cream mixture over medium, stirring occasionally, until warmed through, 5 to 6 minutes. Pour over potatoes and stir gently until smooth and combined. Serve garnished with pepper. REHEAT

oven to 400°F. Spread 2 cups salt on a rimmed baking sheet so it mounds slightly. Arrange potaPREHEAT

108 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

a large colander or a fine-mesh strainer over a large bowl. Scrape vegetables and drippings from reserved baking sheets into colander. Discard vegetables. Pour 1/2 cup broth onto each baking sheet, carefully scraping up any browned bits; add to drippings in bowl. SET

drippings into a fat separator or a tall, narrow container. Let stand for 10 minutes. Skim off fat and discard. Transfer remaining drippings to a medium saucepan. Add remaining 2 cups broth and bring to a boil over medium-low. POUR

whisk cornstarch and 3 tablespoons cold water in a small bowl until smooth. Slowly whisk cornstarch mixture into simmering broth and cook until gravy coats the back of a spoon, about 1 minute. Whisk in butter and vinegar; season with salt and pepper. MEANWHILE,

from heat and cover to keep warm until ready to serve. REMOVE

The Secret to… Silky Grav y Use cornstarch instead of flour to thicken the gravy without the extra step of making a roux.

The Secret to… Moist, Flavorful Stuffing A well-buttered pan and plenty of aromatics make every bite extra delicious.

SAGE AND APPLE STUFFING

HONE Y-APPLE GALET TE WITH PISTACHIO SUGAR

The Secret to… Tender, Flaky Piecrust Less handling means tastier pastry, so make galette instead of pie. There’s much less fussing with the dough.

eggs in a medium bowl until lightly beaten; add broth, vinegar, and remaining 1 teaspoon salt and whisk to combine. Pour broth mixture over bread mixture; stir gently to combine. Let mixture stand, stirring occasionally, until liquid is absorbed, 5 to 10 minutes. WHISK

Sage and Apple Stuffing ACTIVE TIME 20 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 2 HOURS, 20 MINUTES SERVES 10

1 1-lb. crusty rustic bread loaf, torn into 1 1/2-in. pieces 4 Tbsp. unsalted butter, divided 2 Tbsp. olive oil 1/2 cup packed fresh sage leaves

TRANSFER bread-apple mixture to prepared baking dish. Top evenly with remaining crisped sage and dot with remaining 1 tablespoon butter. Cover dish with foil; bake at 350°F until steaming and slightly puffed, about 30 minutes. Uncover; continue baking until golden brown, 30 to 40 minutes. Let cool slightly for 5 to 10 minutes before serving.

2 medium yellow onions, finely chopped 4 stalks celery, sliced 1/2 tsp. freshly ground black pepper 2 1/2 tsp. kosher salt, divided 1 large unpeeled Fuji or Pink Lady apple, grated on large holes of a box grater 2 large eggs

Honey-Apple Galette with Pistachio Sugar ACTIVE TIME 30 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 3 HOURS, 40 MINUTES SERVES 12

2 cups chicken broth

DOUGH

1 Tbsp. apple cider vinegar

2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour 1 Tbsp. granulated sugar

PREHEAT oven to 300°F with racks in upper and lower thirds. Spread bread on 2 rimmed baking sheets and bake until dry and crisp (but hasn’t taken on any color), 18 to 20 minutes, rotating baking sheets from top to bottom halfway through. Let cool for 30 minutes. (Cooled, toasted bread cubes can be stored in an airtight container at room temperature for up to 2 days.)

bread cools, increase oven to 350°F. Grease a 13-by-9-inch baking dish with 1 tablespoon butter. Heat oil and 2 tablespoons butter in a large skillet over medium-high until butter melts. Add sage; cook, stirring often, until crisp, about 1 minute. Using a slotted spoon, transfer sage to a plate.

P I N K P L AT E S ; H E N R Y S T R E E T S T U D I O . C O M F O R I N F O

WHILE

onions, celery, pepper, and 1 1/2 teaspoons salt to same skillet; cook, stirring often, until mixture softens and just begins to turn golden, 6 to 8 minutes. Transfer to a large bowl; add bread, grated apple, and half of the crisped sage. ADD

1 tsp. kosher salt 1 cup (2 sticks) cold unsalted butter, cut into 1/2-in. pieces

the dough: Pulse together flour, sugar, and salt in a food processor until combined, 5 to 6 times. Add butter; pulse until most of the butter is pea-size, about 20 times. While pulsing, drizzle in 1/4 to 1/2 cup ice water until dough just holds together when squeezed. Turn dough out onto a large sheet of plastic wrap; pull in edges of wrap to gather dough, using your knuckles to press dough into a disk. Wrap tightly. Refrigerate for at least 2 hours and up to 3 days (or freeze for up to 1 month). MAKE

the filling: Toss together apples, butter, sugar, honey, lemon zest, lemon juice, and salt in a large bowl. PREPARE

the galette: Roll out chilled dough into an 18-inch round on a lightly floured surface. Transfer to a parchment-lined baking sheet (dough will hang over edges at first). Process pistachios, sugar, and salt in a food processor until finely ground, 30 to 45 seconds. Sprinkle half of the pistachio sugar over center of dough, leaving a 3-inch border. ASSEMBLE

2 Tbsp. granulated sugar

apple filling evenly over dough (keeping the 3-inch border). Fold edges of dough over filling, overlapping as needed. Transfer baking sheet to freezer until galette is firm, about 10 minutes.

2 Tbsp. honey

MEANWHILE,

FILLING

4 unpeeled Granny Smith apples (1 1/2 lb.), very thinly sliced 2 Tbsp. unsalted butter, melted

1 Tbsp. lemon zest plus 1 Tbsp. fresh juice (from 1 lemon) 1/4 tsp. kosher salt ASSEMBLY

All-purpose flour 1/3 cup raw, unsalted pistachios 3 Tbsp. granulated sugar

SPREAD

preheat oven to 350°F with rack in lowest position. Remove baking sheet from freezer and brush edges of galette with egg; sprinkle with remaining pistachio sugar. Bake until crust is deep golden brown and apples start to brown, 50 to 55 minutes. Let stand at room temperature for at least 10 minutes and up to 8 hours.

1/2 tsp. kosher salt 1 large egg, beaten Take your pick of our favorite cranberry sauce recipes at realsimple.com/cranberrysauce.

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

111

W H I T E P L AT E SPECIAL

W H E T H E R Y O U K E E P T H E M C A S U A L O R D R E S S T H E M U P, Y O U R D A I L Y D I S H E S P R O V I D E T H E P E R F E C T F O U N D A T I O N F O R A S T U N N I N G H O L I D AY TA B L E . BY

LESLIE CORONA

AND

PHOTO GR APHS BY PROP ST YLING BY

STEPHANIE SISCO

ADDIE JUELL

GLEN PROEBSTEL

P L AY F U L P O P Arrange a spectrum of salad plates and napkins along your table and add a complementary centerpiece. The rich jewel tones combined with copper flatware and warm wooden candleholders make the rainbow setup feel more adult.

TO B U Y:

Snack Plates, $30 each; feltandfat.com. Festival Dinner Napkins, $57 for 4 of 1 color; sferra.com. Satin Copper Flatware Set, $280 for 4 5-piece sets; rigbyhome.com. Drinkers, $55 each; glassybaby.com. Simple Candle Holders, from $45 each, and 13-Inch Taper Candles, $8 for 2; hawkinsnewyork.com. Flared Cereal Bowls (similar to shown), from $75 each; mudaustralia.com.

TA I L O R E D CL ASSIC Polished elements, like silver chargers, chinoiserie salad plates, and tortoise-handle flatware, stand out against a deep blue tablecloth. Printed menus and place cards emphasize the formality of the setup.

Japanese Garden Salad Plate, $50 for 4; williams-sonoma.com. Antique Charger, $43; potterybarn.com. Brela Napkin, $38 for 4; serenaandlily.com. Classic Menu by Lauren Chism, $42 for 15, and Wedding Place Card, $7 for 5; minted.com. Bunny Williams Melange 5-Piece Flatware Set, $79; ballarddesigns.com. Etched Blooms Tumbler, $18; shopterrain.com. Orford Wine Glass, $55 for 4; thewhitecompany.com. Savannah Gardens Tablecloth, from $149; matouk.com.

TO B U Y:

The Everyday Bowls in Eggshell, $34 each; eastfork .com. Contrast Color Edge Linen Napkins in Mustard, $12 each, and Textured Lowball Glasses, $18 each; schoolhouse.com. Bistro Teak 5-Piece Flatware Sets, $85 each; unisonhome .com. Feed Artisan Serving Set, $38, Serving Board, $88, and Baby Bowl and Spoon, $38; feedprojects.com to preorder. Tassel Runner in Copper, $48; thelittlemarket.com. TO B U Y:

WA R M & N EU T R A L Wooden serving pieces, organic stoneware bowls, and earthy orange glassware create a welcoming setting that will encourage guests to linger. Forgo napkin rings and knot your linens instead to reinforce the relaxed vibe.

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

115

W H I T E P L AT E S S H O W N T H RO U G H O U T S TO RY:

Made by Design Glass Dinner Plates, $3 each; target.com.

MODERN GRAPHIC Atop a clean white canvas, this blackand-white approach looks anything but basic, thanks to an assortment of textures and patterns alongside sleeker elements.

TO B U Y: Made by Design Glass Salad Plates, $11 for 6; target.com. Torrent Plates, $42 each (small); infavorof .com. Apilco Reglisse Salad Plates in Black, $100 for 4; williams-sonoma.com. Bitmap Textiles Napkins in Black and White, $36 for 4; areaware.com. Simple Things Double Old Fashion Glasses in Gray, $4 each; kirklands .com. Big Forks and Big Spoons in Matte Black, $15 each; yearandday.com. Seville Tablecloth, $109; thewhitecompany.com.

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

117

SOMETHING NEW F O R FA L L M a k e u p r o u t i n e s t u c k o n r e p e a t ? P i c k o n e e a s y c h a n g e — g r a y l i n e r, g r e e n s h a d o w, s i e n n a l i p s t i c k — a n d l o o k f r e s h a l l s e a s o n .

burnt sienna lips

By Heather Muir Maffei

H A I R B Y H E R V É F O R D AV I N E S AT S A R A H L A I R D & G O O D C O M PA N Y; S T Y L I N G B Y J O R DY H U I N D E R

If rose has been your go-to, consider this fun fall option. The red-orange shade delivers a pop that’s edgier than pink but not as intimidating as red. It warms up all complexions, looking bold on fair skin tones and more nude on darker ones. Try Rouge Dior Ultra Care Liquid in #707 Bliss ($38; dior.com), which has oils to prevent lips from drying.

P h o to g ra p h s b y M e i Ta o

Makeup by Moani Lee

TO BUY:

(Opposite page) Slim Stretch Perfect Shirt, $69.50; jcrew .com. Plaid Sweater, $89.50; anntaylor.com. Amy Earrings, $135; apc-us.com. Studs, model’s own. Gold Pendant Necklace, $10; hm.com. (This page) Aline Blouse, $250; apc-us.com. Easy Hoops, $30; ettika.com. 2-Pack Necklaces, $10; hm.com.

sunset face Not sure which colors to wear together? Stick with peachy pink on eyes, lips, and cheeks for a monochromatic, romantic look. Swipe Nudestix Nudies Bloom in Sweet Peach Peony ($32; nudestix.com) over all three features. The creamy stick makes it a breeze to blend.

honey cheeks For a blush update, give pink the backseat and usher in glow-inducing terra-cotta. Worn along your cheekbones, it’ll perk up your complexion while adding a modern twist. Try Cover FX Monochromatic Blush Duo in Warm Honey ($38; ulta .com), which comes in matte and shimmer to suit your mood.

TO BUY: (This page) Mock Neck Top, $26; zara.com. Nico Sweater, $370; apc-us.com. Classic Houndstooth Girlfriend Blazer, $148; gap.com. 2-Pack Necklaces, $10; hm.com. (Opposite page) Contrasting Poplin Blouse, $50; zara.com. Rita Sweater, $280; apc-us.com. Gold Hoop Earrings, $7; hm.com. Suzanne Necklace, $220; apc-us.com.

120 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

emerald eyes Smoky eyes your staple? Swap black for shimmery green. You’ll still get drama but with a cooler feel. Concentrate the powder on your lids, blending just under your creases, then trace it along your lower lash lines. Try Anastasia Beverly Hills Eyeshadow in Emerald ($12; ulta.com).

graphic gray eyes Gray eyeliner adds sexy definition that’s softer than black. Wing it out from the outer corners and/or drag it along the inner, lower corners, stopping below your pupils. Try Marc Jacobs Beauty Highliner Liquid-Gel Eyeliner in Steel the Show ($27; sephora.com), which has an easy-to-use tapered tip.

satin orchid lips A satin finish is a nice, grown-up alternative to gloss. These formulas pack more pigment (so you can reapply less often) and offer a sheen instead of a sticky feel. Dab it on with your finger for a lived-in look. Try Maybelline New York Color Sensational Rebel Bloom Lipstick in Lilac Flush ($7.50; maybelline.com).

TO BUY: (Opposite page) Oversized Poplin Blouse, $50; zara.com. Black and White Checked Blazer, $90; zara.com. Squared Off 18kt Gold Plated

Hoops, $40; ettika.com. (This page) White Top with Ruched Collar, $26; zara.com. Lucille Jacket, $435; apc-us.com.

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

123

friends for life Fe m a l e f r i e n d s h i p , t h e s t o r y g o e s , m u s t b e f r a u g h t w i t h f i g h t i n g a n d j e a l o u s y. A n n Pa t c h e t t t e l l s a n o t h e r s to r y : o n e o f a s we e t , s u p p o r t i ve b o n d t h a t ’s n e a r l y 5 0 y e a r s s t ro n g .

Illustrations by Gracia Lam

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

125

hile I was hiking alone in Utah last summer, a chicken crossed my path. She turned her head, pretending not to notice me, but didn’t run off. I’d never spent time in Utah, and I didn’t know if loose chickens were common at high altitudes. I pulled out my phone and called my friend Tavia. “You can’t take a picture, can you?” she asked, knowing full well the only phone I have is a 15-year-old flip phone that I save for things like hiking alone in Utah. It doesn’t take pictures. I am, however, perfectly capable of describing a chicken. I told her it was a mottled brown, full-size, some white spots around the neck. I asked if it could be a prairie chicken. “Almost impossible,” she said. “They’re extremely rare.” After a few more questions— what was my altitude? What did her head look like?—she told me it was a grouse, maybe a sharp-tailed, maybe a sage. Then, since we were on the phone anyway, she asked how my mother was doing.

126 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

If I were on a game show, Tavia Cathcart would be my lifeline. There is nothing in the natural world she doesn’t know. She has hunted for wildflowers in Patagonia and led groups of people straight up the side of a mountain in Mexico to see millions of monarch butterflies. She runs a nature preserve in Kentucky, writes plant-identification guides, and hosts a gardening show on Kentucky Educational Television that was just nominated for an Emmy. She is the polymath of plant life. We’ve been best friends since we were 7. Tavia says the first time she saw me (“The first time I really saw you”), we were in a dance class. She says I was trying to hide behind my mother’s knees. I don’t remember this, but that doesn’t matter, because Tavia and I share our memories: She remembers half and I remember half. What’s certain is we were born in Los Angeles in the month of December in 1963. We both have one older sister. Our parents both divorced around the same time. My mother got custody of me and my sister and moved us to Nashville. Tavia’s father got custody of her and her sister and moved them to Nashville. That was where we met, in Catholic school, in second grade. These would be fairly eye-popping coincidences for an adult, but for children they were a call to be soul sisters, a fact that pleased our parents, since they relied on each other for help. I think half of my childhood was spent in Tavia’s apartment and half of her childhood was spent in my house, or in the houses of our two grandmothers, who lived a few blocks from each other

P H O T O G R A P H S C O U R T E S Y O F A N N PAT C H E T T

and very near our school. In the summer, the two sets of sisters would fly to Los Angeles together to visit our missing parents. Of all our friends in Nashville, I alone knew Tavia’s mother, and she alone knew my father. That in itself would have been enough to bond us for life. Still, for all the parallels, we were an unlikely match. Tavia, the most beautiful child in the world, grew into the most beautiful girl. She was wildly popular, captain of the cheerleading team (“Do you have to say that?” she asked when I told her I was writing about her), sweetheart queen, sorority president. Boys trailed behind her like a tail on a kite. When she laughed, she bent at the waist, her auburn curls falling forward. I remember once, when we were shoe shopping, my mother told Tavia that if she laughed and bent over one more time she was going to kill the poor guy who was trying to put a shoe on her foot. As for me, well, I was not that girl. “If I was writing about you,” Tavia said, “I would write about your remarkable talent, and your quiet and determined ways to create art.” Which, in high school, felt like a nice way of saying there were no boys outside my window. The reader may be tempted to think she was the pretty one and I was the smart one, but that would be a fairy tale. Tavia is scorching smart. Fairy tales are where we get so much of our information about girls, including the notion that girls must be jealous of other girls, that girls select their friends based on their similar social strata, that girls fight with one another. All these things can be true and all these things can be false. For Tavia and me, they were false. Maybe that was due to the bedrock of our family connection, or maybe we found each other amazing. Maybe we just loved each other a lot. We graduated, moved away, got married too young and then divorced, though Tavia held on longer than I did. Neither of us had children. For a while we lived in different parts of California, then we moved back to Tennessee. “I don’t remember a single bad word between us,” she said. “But that would be my selective memory, so who knows?” I do remember her expressing such sadness when I lit a cigarette while we were walking on the beach in our 20s. “All this beauty,” she said, holding her hand out to the ocean, “and you’re smoking?”

Above, left: The author (far left), Tavia (center), and friend Pam in 2005. Above, right: Tavia (blue jacket) and the author (red jacket) with friend Trudy in 1971. Right: The author (left) and Tavia in 1973.

Eventually I stopped smoking. I became a writer. Tavia had some luck as an actress, went to San Francisco and made money in the early days of tech, and then just stepped away. My bombshell best friend moved off the grid and into the Sierra Nevada mountains, wrote poetry, studied plants and birds and insects with a worshipful hunger. Tavia had found her calling, and I watched her reinvention with awe. I read an article recently about friendships that die over time. It said we shouldn’t feel bad about it. People change, after all, grow in different directions. Nothing lasts forever. I’ve lost a few friendships over the years—everyone has—but Tavia and I are in this life together. Some years we’re very busy and all we manage to do is exchange birthday cards; other years we talk on the phone while she’s driving to work; other years we see each other all the time. We don’t question it. I never wonder if she might be mad at me or if I’ve been neglectful. As we come up on 50 years together, I would say ours is a friendship full of trust and elasticity. We continually adjust. We were the

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

127

Ta via a n d I a re in th is life to geth e r. S ome ye ars we’re ve r y b us y a n d a ll we ma nage to do is exch a n g e b ir thda y c ard s; other ye a rs we se e e ach other al l th e tim e. We d o n’t qu e st io n i t.

128 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

girls who left school early to go back to my mother’s apartment and listen to Margie Adam records. (“It felt so cosmopolitan,” Tavia said.) We once weathered a tornado together in my cousin’s basement. I remember when we were in our 30s, both living in Nashville, and Tavia’s mediocre boyfriend gave her a Valentine’s card he hadn’t signed—not his name, not hers. When she called to tell me, we laughed ourselves sick (“Did he think I was going to save it and give it to someone else next year?”). She helped me come up with every plant in my novel State of Wonder. She has a key to our house and stays here when she comes down from Kentucky to visit her father. We are both happily married now, another marvel, and our husbands talk and talk while we slip away to walk our dogs. We always have dogs, Tavia and I, just like we always have each other. “We became friends because we were the lucky ones,” she explained to me years ago. And maybe that’s true, except I’ve never really thought of Tavia as lucky. As much as

H O W TO N U RT U R E YO U R OLDEST FRIENDSHIPS Those she’s-got-yourback soulmates are the best. In fact, studies have found that good pals don’t just make us happier; they keep us healthier. But maintaining friendships can be hard as our lives evolve. Here, some advice to keep the spark alive with longtime pals.

You’re navigating long-distance.

she has taught me about the natural world, I’ve learned the most from her indefatigable good cheer, her conscious decision to lead a happy life. She was the girl every girl wanted to be, even though she had to work two jobs after school, even though she’s spent her life saddled with type 1 diabetes. No matter what hand she was dealt, she made her life seem effortless, glamorous. If she’s driving a bush hog or running a chain saw on a nature preserve, she’s wearing lip gloss. She was born on New Year’s Eve and seems to exist in a perpetual spritz of golden champagne bubbles, not because it just happened that way, but because she made it happen. Last winter, she told me how to save the enormous beetle who had tried to hibernate by stuffing half his body into the window sash outside my office where I write. It was 20 degrees and the bug had blown loose in a storm and been thrown into an abandoned spider’s web. She told me to build him a cave by putting a mason jar on its side, filling it halfway with dirt, and covering it with leaves. I carried the bug outside and nudged him into his new home. He seemed to take to it. And that’s Tavia. She knows how to save a beetle and will take the time to talk me through it. Together we saved him. Together we save ourselves.

Random reminders of how much you care fill in the cracks between calls and get-togethers. “Small acts celebrate your connection,” says Deborah Tannen, PhD, a linguistics professor at Georgetown University and the author of You’re the Only One I Can Tell. See a pillow she’d like while browsing Etsy? Send it. Love a new podcast? Share it. Says Shasta Nelson, author of Frientimacy: “Remember how easy friendship was as a kid? That’s because consistency was automatic when we were in the same camp cabin or class,” she says. “Later, we have to create the consistency.”

You’re a frequent texter. She’s a social media poster. If you and your pal aren’t on the same page about how to communicate, start a conversation about the logistics of keeping in touch. “One friend can feel close just seeing Facebook updates, while another might feel rejected without regular calls,” says Tannen. Make a plan and stick to it.

You’ve been out of contact and want to rekindle your bond. “Reconnecting with old friends can be so rewarding,” says Nelson. Her advice is to be the first to call or email. Be a little vulnerable. Tell her you miss her and share what prompted you to reach out, especially if she might be caught off guard. For example, says Nelson, maybe you were dropping your kid off at college and remembered your time as roommates. Tell her you regret falling out of touch. “We can pick up and rebuild this incredibly meaningful relationship that would be hard to replicate if we were just meeting someone new,” says Nelson. —Sharlene Breakey

Ann Patchett’s most recent novel is The Dutch House.

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

129

Earn 4% cash back on dining & entertainment So check out a new ramen shop or get tickets to a new show. With the Capital One® Savor ® card, when you go out, you cash in.

FO O D ST Y L I N G BY R I S H O N H A N N E R S ; P R O P ST Y L I N G BY C L A I R E S P O L L E N

N OV E M B E R Take a deep breath—holiday season is here. And with it comes the pressure to cook more (and cook better) than you do any other time of year. But food tastes best when the vibe is relaxed, so for most of the month, stick to no-fuss weeknight dishes, like shrimp stir-fry (page 132) and carrot soup (page 133). Make a prep list for Thanksgiving, then unwind on the couch with a pint of our favorite cinnamon ice cream (page 142). Even Turkey Day can be easygoing when you set out a tray of spice-topped pigs in a blanket (page 140) to keep the hungry guests at bay while you finish the gravy. Pressure, released.

Photograph by Caitlin Bensel

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

131

FOOD

soy sauce, chile paste, and honey in a small bowl. Squeeze in 2 tablespoons juice from 1 lime and stir to combine. Cut remaining lime into wedges and set aside. PLACE

Spicy sambal shrimp stir-fry ACTIVE TIME 15 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 20 MINUTES SERVES 4

✓ Quick Cooking ✓ One Pot

2 Tbsp. low-sodium soy sauce or tamari 1 1/2 Tbsp. hot chile paste (such as sambal oelek) or sriracha 1 Tbsp. honey 2 limes

1 tablespoon oil in a large skillet over medium-high. Add shrimp and season with salt. Cook, stirring occasionally, until shrimp are opaque, 2 to 3 minutes. Transfer to a plate. HEAT

1 Tbsp. finely chopped fresh ginger (from a 1-in. piece)

ADD remaining 1 tablespoon oil to skillet. Add snow peas, carrots, garlic, and ginger and cook, stirring constantly, until vegetables are crisp-tender, 1 to 2 minutes. Stir in sambal mixture and shrimp; cook, stirring constantly, until sauce is slightly thickened and shrimp are heated through, about 1 minute. Serve stir-fry over rice with lime wedges alongside; garnish with sesame seeds and cilantro leaves.

Cooked jasmine rice, sesame seeds, and fresh cilantro leaves, for serving

PER SERVING: 263 CALORIES, 8G FAT (1G SAT.), 274MG CHOL., 2G FIBER, 36G PRO., 12G CARB., 746MG SOD., 8G SUGAR

2 Tbsp. canola oil, divided 1 1/2 lb. peeled, deveined, tail-on large raw shrimp 1/4 tsp. kosher salt 6 oz. snow peas (about 2 cups), trimmed 2 large carrots, peeled and thinly sliced crosswise 3 cloves garlic, finely chopped

R e c i p e s b y Pa i g e G r a n d j e a n 132 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Photographs by Caitlin Bensel

F O O D S T Y L I N G B Y M A R G A R E T D I C K E Y; P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y C L A I R E S P O L L E N

Easy Dinner 1

a baking sheet with parchment paper. Melt 3 tablespoons butter in a large saucepan over medium-high. Add rosemary and cook until crisp, about 2 minutes. Remove and discard rosemary. Add almonds, sugar, and cayenne to butter in pan and cook, stirring constantly, until almonds are lightly browned, 2 to 3 minutes. Spread almond mixture in a single layer on prepared baking sheet; season with 1/4 teaspoon salt. Let cool completely, about 15 minutes. Break into bitesize pieces. LINE

Easy Dinner 2

5 Tbsp. unsalted butter, divided 2 fresh rosemary sprigs

Carrot soup with candied almonds ACTIVE TIME 25 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 45 MINUTES SERVES 4

✓ Freezable ✓ Make Ahead ✓ Vegetarian

1/2 cup sliced almonds 2 Tbsp. granulated sugar 1/4 tsp. cayenne 1 1/4 tsp. kosher salt, divided 1 small yellow onion, chopped (about 1 cup) 2 cloves garlic, chopped 2 lb. carrots, peeled and chopped 4 1/2 cups low-sodium vegetable broth, divided 1/2 tsp. black pepper 2 oz. fresh goat cheese, softened 4 diagonally cut baguette slices (1 in. thick), toasted Extra-virgin olive oil, for serving

almonds cool, wipe out saucepan and heat remaining 2 tablespoons butter over medium. Add onion and garlic; cook, stirring occasionally, until softened, about 8 minutes. Add carrots, 4 cups broth, pepper, and remaining 1 teaspoon salt. Cover and cook until carrots are very tender, 20 to 25 minutes. Transfer mixture to a blender and secure lid; remove center cap to allow steam to escape. Place a clean dish towel over opening. Blend until very smooth, about 1 minute, adding remaining 1/2 cup broth if needed to reach desired consistency. WHILE

goat cheese on toasts. Divide soup among 4 bowls; top each with a goat cheese toast. Drizzle with oil and sprinkle with candied almonds. SPREAD

PER SERVING: 462 CALORIES, 26G FAT (13G SAT.), 49MG CHOL., 9G FIBER, 11G PRO., 50G CARB., 872MG SOD., 20G SUGAR

FOOD

4 oz. uncooked rice vermicelli noodles 1 Tbsp. canola oil 4 boneless, skinless chicken thighs (about 1 1/4 lb.) 1/2 tsp. kosher salt 1/2 tsp. black pepper 1/4 cup creamy peanut butter 1/4 cup canned unsweetened coconut milk, well shaken 1 1/2 Tbsp. fresh lime juice (from 1 lime) 1 Tbsp. low-sodium soy sauce 1/2 Tbsp. sriracha 12 Bibb lettuce leaves 1 cup thinly sliced English cucumber Thinly sliced scallions, basil leaves, and chopped roasted peanuts, for serving rice noodles according to package directions. SOAK

heat oil in a grill pan or cast-iron skillet over mediumhigh. Season chicken with salt and pepper and cook, flipping once, until charred and cooked through, 4 to 5 minutes per side. Transfer to a cutting board and let rest for 5 minutes. Thinly slice. MEANWHILE,

Easy Dinner 3

Chicken satay lettuce wraps ACTIVE TIME 15 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 25 MINUTES SERVES 4

✓ Quick Cooking ✓ Family Friendly

134 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

peanut butter, coconut milk, lime juice, soy sauce, and sriracha in a small bowl. WHISK

chicken and noodles with lettuce, cucumber, and peanut sauce, alongside scallions, basil, and peanuts for topping. SERVE

PER SERVING: 445 CALORIES, 23G FAT (7G SAT.), 130MG CHOL., 2G FIBER, 31G PRO., 29G CARB., 897MG SOD., 3G SUGAR

Eat in peace. For once.

Easy Dinner 4

Sheet pan bratwurst hoagies ACTIVE TIME 15 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 40 MINUTES SERVES 4

✓ Make Ahead ✓ Family Friendly

2 1/2 cups shredded red cabbage 1 medium yellow onion, thinly sliced 2 Tbsp. olive oil 1/4 tsp. kosher salt 1/4 tsp. black pepper 4 bratwurst links (1 lb.) 4 Tbsp. country-style Dijon mustard 4 7-in. pretzel buns or hoagie rolls, split and toasted 1 small Honeycrisp or Fuji apple, thinly sliced 2 tsp. apple cider vinegar 2 Tbsp. chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley oven to 350°F. Toss cabbage, onion, oil, salt, and pepper on a rimmed baking sheet until well combined. Spread in an even layer and top with bratwurst. Bake until cabbage is tender and bratwurst is cooked through, about 30 minutes. PREHEAT

1 tablespoon mustard on cut sides of each bun; nestle in bratwurst and apple slices. Add vinegar to cabbage mixture on baking sheet; toss until cabbage turns bright purple. Spoon about 1/4 cup cabbage over each bratwurst and top with parsley. SPREAD

PER SERVING: 671 CALORIES, 37G FAT (13G SAT.), 75MG CHOL., 3G FIBER, 27G PRO., 54G CARB., 1,639MG SOD., 9G SUGAR

136 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

CO OK WITH COZI Get Real Simple’s easy weeknight-dinner recipes in Cozi, a free meal-planning and organizing app from Meredith Corporation (available on iTunes and Google Play).

FOOD

1 1/2 cups uncooked farro 6 Tbsp. olive oil, divided 1 large sweet potato, peeled and cut into 3/4-in. chunks 1 tsp. kosher salt, divided 1 large shallot, finely chopped (about 1/4 cup)

Easy Dinner 5

Farro bowl with pomegranate vinaigrette ACTIVE TIME 25 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 45 MINUTES SERVES 4

1 cup refrigerated pomegranate juice 1 Tbsp. red wine vinegar 2 tsp. Dijon mustard 1/4 tsp. black pepper 2 cups baby spinach 1 medium fennel bulb, halved and thinly sliced, plus chopped fronds for serving 1/2 cup crumbled feta cheese (about 2 oz.)

✓ Whole-Grain ✓ Vegetarian

1/4 cup water, and 1/4 teaspoon salt; cover and steam for 5 minutes. Uncover and continue to cook, stirring occasionally, until water evaporates and sweet potato is tender and browned, 10 to 12 minutes. Transfer to bowl with farro. 1 tablespoon oil in same skillet over medium. Add shallot and cook, stirring often, until softened, 3 to 4 minutes. Add pomegranate juice; cook, stirring occasionally, until reduced to 1/2 cup, 8 to 10 minutes. Whisk in vinegar, mustard, pepper, and remaining 3/4 teaspoon salt. Remove from heat and gradually whisk remaining 1/4 cup oil into dressing. HEAT

3/4 cup dressing to farro mixture and toss to coat. Add spinach and fennel; toss gently. Divide among 4 bowls and drizzle with remaining dressing. Top with cheese and garnish with fennel fronds. ADD

a large pot of water to a boil over high. Stir in farro and bring to a simmer. Reduce heat to medium-low; cook, uncovered, stirring occasionally, until tender, about 20 minutes. Drain and place in a large bowl. BRING

farro cooks, heat 1 tablespoon oil in a large skillet over medium. Add sweet potato, WHILE

PER SERVING: 569 CALORIES, 24G FAT (5G SAT.), 13MG CHOL., 10G FIBER, 14G PRO., 78G CARB., 816MG SOD., 15G SUGAR

NOVEMBER 2019 REAL SIMPLE

137

FOOD

Better for You F A S T, H E A L T H Y, A N D F U L L O F F L AVO R. T H I S M O N T H : ROA STED GARLIC AND S W E E T P OTATO P O L E N TA By Ananda Eidelstein

1 lb. sweet potatoes (3 small potatoes) 4 Tbsp. olive oil, divided 1 head garlic 2 tsp. plus 2 pinches kosher salt, divided Freshly ground black pepper 1 Tbsp. fresh rosemary leaves or 6 small fresh sage leaves 1½ cups instant polenta oven to 425°F. Place potatoes on a rimmed baking sheet and poke holes with a fork. Rub with 1 tablespoon oil. PREHEAT

off ¼ inch from top of garlic head to expose cloves; place on a large piece of foil. Drizzle garlic with 1 tablespoon oil; season with a pinch each salt and pepper. Wrap in foil and place on baking sheet with potatoes. Bake until potatoes are tender when squeezed, 40 to 45 minutes. CUT

CUT potatoes lengthwise; scoop flesh into a bowl. Unwrap garlic and squeeze cloves into bowl. Mash potatoes and garlic together and set aside. LINE a plate with paper towels. Heat remaining 2 tablespoons oil in a small skillet over medium-high. Add rosemary and fry until crispy, about 10 seconds. Using a slotted spoon, transfer rosemary to plate, reserving oil in skillet. Season rosemary with a pinch of salt. BRING 6½ cups water and 1 teaspoon salt to a boil in a large saucepan over medium-high. Gradually whisk in polenta; reduce heat to medium-low and cook, stirring constantly, until polenta is tender and mixture thickens, about 5 minutes. Fold in sweet potato mixture, reserved oil, remaining 1 teaspoon salt, and a bit more pepper. Top with fried rosemary. PER SERVING: 287 CALORIES, 9G FAT (1G SAT.), 0MG CHOL., 6G FIBER, 4G PRO., 38G CARB., 883MG SOD., 3G SUGAR

Find more recipes using the superfood at realsimple.com/ sweetpotatoes.

138 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Photograph by Caitlin Bensel

FO O D ST Y L I N G BY R I S H O N H A N N E R S ; P R O P ST Y L I N G BY C L A I R E S P O L L E N

ACTIVE TIME 20 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 1 HOUR, 5 MINUTES SERVES 6

FOOD

ACTIVE TIME 20 MINUTES TOTAL TIME 1 HOUR, 25 MINUTES MAKES 36

1 17.3-oz. pkg. frozen puff pastry sheets, thawed All-purpose flour 1 large egg, lightly beaten 12 hot dogs, cut into thirds 1 Tbsp. coriander seeds, crushed 1 Tbsp. sesame seeds Flaky sea salt Honey mustard, whole-grain mustard, and/or ketchup, for serving 1 pastry sheet on lightly floured parchment paper; roll out into a 12-inch square. Cut into 3 equal rectangles, then cut each rectangle crosswise into 6 2-by-4-inch strips. Transfer parchment with pastry to a baking sheet. Repeat using additional floured parchment, remaining pastry sheet, and a second baking sheet. You’ll have 36 strips total. PLACE

with 1 pastry strip at a time, lightly brush 1 short edge with beaten egg. Place 1 hot dog piece on opposite short edge and roll up; gently press seam to seal. Arrange pigs in a blanket, seam sides down, 1 inch apart on baking sheets.

Big Batch CO O K O N C E A N D R E A P T H E R E WA R D S. THIS MONTH: PIGS IN A BLANKET WITH CORIANDER AND SESAME SEEDS By Ananda Eidelstein

oven to 400°F with racks in upper and lower thirds. Brush tops of pigs in a blanket with egg; sprinkle with coriander, sesame, and salt. Freeze until firm, about 30 minutes. Bake until puffed and golden brown, 20 to 25 minutes. Serve with your choice of mustards and/or ketchup. PREHEAT

Transfer frozen pigs in a blanket to sealable freezer bags; freeze for up to 3 months. (To bake from frozen, add 5 minutes to baking time.) TO FREEZE:

140 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Photograph by Caitlin Bensel

FO O D ST Y L I N G BY R I S H O N H A N N E R S ; P R O P ST Y L I N G BY C L A I R E S P O L L E N

WORKING

S I M P LY H O L I D AY S

‘REAL’ for FREE

Quote

shipping

WINE GOES WHERE YOU GO! MY HOMETOWN JIGSAW PUZZLE A unique Map Gift with your home in the center!

www.butlerandhill.com/real

We make your t-shirts into a quilt. 100% quilted, outstanding quality, great prices! Call today for $10 off!

Stack & Stash these lightweight, but sturdy tumblers in your purse or backpack for tasty wine on-the-go. Dishwasher-Safe & Recyclable. Made in USA & BPA Free. Code REALS for FREE SHIPPING til 12/1

800-880-8534 | campusquilt.com

HaloVino.com

T-SHIRTS QUILTS CAMPUS QUILT

Handcrafted fresh from the Pacific Northwest

Toucan; Your Year to Go! Caravan Makes It So Easy and Affordable to Visit Costa Rica

9-Day Tour $1295 +tax,fees Fresh Wreaths, Centerpieces, Garland, and Trees FREE SHippiNg

Volcanoes • Rainforests • Beaches Come explore Costa Rica on a fully guided tour with Caravan. All Hotels • All Meals • All Activities Caravan handles all the details. Join the smart shoppers and experienced travelers. Call now for choice dates. Happy Travels!ÑCaravan Panama 8-Days $1295+tax,fees

Save $5 Using promo code REAL19

FREE Tour Catalog 1-800-CARAVAN • Caravan.com

WWW.LYNCHCREEKFARM.COM #1 In Value—Fully Guided Tours Since 1952 To advertise: Contact Devin at MI Integrated Media, 860-542-5180 or devin@mi-ms.com

FOOD

R o a d Te s t

Fall Flavors WE TESTED 157 ITEMS! THESE SIX WILL S AT I S F Y YO U R AU T U M N C R AV I N G S A N D M A K E YO U F E E L COZ Y A L L S E A S O N LO N G. By Mar y Honkus

realsimple ROAD TE ST

BEST PUMPKIN SPICE

Whole Foods Market 365 Spiced Pumpkin Pancake and Waffle Mix A fall upgrade on a classic. With buttermilk and real pumpkin, this mix makes holiday breakfasts a breeze. TO BUY: $5; at Whole Foods.

BEST CINNAMON

BEST MAPLE B E S T S W E E T P OTAT O

Terra Sweet Potato Chips Made with just three ingredients (sweet potatoes, vegetable oil, and sea salt), these chips have an ideal balance of sweet and salty. The thick-cut ripples give them a sturdy crunch, so serve them with your favorite dip or alongside a bowl of chili. TO BUY: $4; at grocery stores.

142 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Base Culture Maple Almond Butter Sweetened with maple sugar, this chunky nut butter is loaded with crushed almonds. Stir it into oatmeal or spread it on toast for a morning treat. TO BUY: $9; at grocery stores.

P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U FA C T U R E R S

McConnell’s Fine Ice Creams Cinnamon & Oatmeal Raisin Cookies Swirled with cinnamon, this ice cream is made with grass-fed milk and packed with chunks of freshly baked cookies. TO BUY: $12; mcconnells.com.

BEST APPLE

Stonewall Kitchen Caramel Apple Butter This decadent spread tastes like apple pie in a jar. Enjoy it as a topping for baked fruit and ice cream, or spread it on slabs of spiced cake. TO BUY: $8; stonewallkitchen.com.

B E S T C R A N B E R RY

Vermont Creamery Cranberry, Orange & Cinnamon Goat Cheese Tangy and fruity, this versatile log is great crumbled over salads or as the centerpiece of your Thanksgiving cheese board. TO BUY: $5; at grocery stores.

For quick autumn recipes, go to realsimple.com/fallflavors.

Statement of Ownership, Management, and Circulation (Requester Publications Only)

BRIGHT OFFERS

EVENTS

FINDS

IDEAS

GIVEAWAYS

1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8.

Publication Title: REAL SIMPLE Publication Number: 19143 Filing Date: October 1, 2019 Issue Frequency: Monthly Number of Issues Published Annually: 12 Annual Subscription Price: $18 Complete Mailing Address of Known Office of Publication: 225 Liberty St., New York, NY 10281 Complete Mailing Address of Headquarters or General Business Office of Publisher: 1716 Locust St., Des Moines, IA 50309 9. Full Name and Complete Mailing Address of the Publisher, Editor, and Managing Editor: Publisher: Daren Mazzucca, 225 Liberty St., New York, NY 10281-1008 Editor: Leslie Yazel, 225 Liberty St., New York, NY 10281-1008 Managing Editor: Lavinel Savu, 225 Liberty St., New York, NY 10281-1008 10. Owner: Meredith Corporation, 1716 Locust St., Des Moines, IA 50309-3023 The names and addresses of all stockholders owning or holding 1 percent or more of the total amount of stock: • State Street Global Advisors (SSgA), Attn: Cyrus Taraporevala, 1 Lincoln St., Boston, MA 02111 • BlackRock Fund Advisors, Attn: Larry Fink, 400 Howard St., San Francisco, CA 94105 • The Vanguard Group Inc., Attn: Binbin Guo, 100 Vanguard Blvd., Malvern, PA 19355 • Royce & Associates LP, Attn: Charlie Royce, 745 Fifth Ave., New York, NY 10151 • Dimensional Fund Advisors LP, Attn: Dave Butler, 6300 Bee Cave Rd., Austin, TX 78746 • Fairpointe Capital LLC, Attn: Thyra Zerhusen, 1 N. Franklin St., Chicago, IL 60606 • Barrow, Hanley, Mewhinney & Strauss LLC, Attn: James Barrow, 2200 Ross Ave., Dallas, TX 75201 • Ariel Investments LLC, Attn: John Rogers, 200 E. Randolph St., Chicago, IL 60601 • Ceredex Value Advisors LLC, Attn: George Aylward, 301 E. Pine St., Orlando, FL 32801 • Aberdeen Standard Investments Inc., Attn: Andrew Smith, 1735 Market St., Philadelphia, PA 19103 • Northern Trust Investments Inc., Attn: William Hyatt, 50 LaSalle St., Chicago, IL 60603 • Silvercrest Asset Management Group LLC, Attn: Richard Hough, 1330 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10019 • Channing Capital Management LLC, Attn: Timothy Kroll, 10 S. LaSalle St., Chicago, IL 60603 • DePrince, Race & Zollo Inc., Attn: John Race, 250 Park Ave., S., Winter Park, FL 32789 • Delaware Investment Management Business Trust, 2005 Market St., Philadelphia, PA 19103 • River Road Asset Management LLC, Attn: Richard Beck, 462 S. Fourth St., Louisville, KY 40202 • Norges Bank Investment Management, Bankplassen 2 Oslo, PS 0107 Norway • Bowen, Hanes & Co. Inc., Attn: Harold Bowen, 3290 Northside Pkwy., Atlanta, GA 30327 • PPM America Inc., Attn: James Young, 225 W. Wacker Dr., Chicago, IL 60606 • Raymond James & Associates Inc. (Invt. Mgmt.), Attn: Dennis Zank, 880 Carillon Pkwy., St. Petersburg, FL 33716 • Nuveen Asset Management LLC, Attn: Anthony Boase, 333 W. Wacker Dr., Chicago, IL 60606 • Geode Capital Management LLC, Attn: Patrick Waddell, 1 Post Office Sq., Boston, MA 02109 • Mellon Investments Corp., Attn: Caroline Higgins, BNY Mellon Center, One Boston Pl., Boston, MA 02108 • William Blair Investment Management LLC, Attn: Mark Leslie, 150 N. Riverside Plaza, Chicago, IL 60606. Through some of the nominees listed above, the E.T. Meredith and Bohen families and family foundations own, directly or beneficially, approximately 13 percent of the issued and outstanding stock of the corporation. Each nominee listed above holds stock for one or more stockholders. 11. Known Bondholders, Mortgages, and Other Security Holders Owning or Holding 1 Percent or More of Total Amount of Bonds, Mortgages, or Other Securities: None 12. Tax Status (for completion by nonprofit organizations authorized to mail at nonprofit rates): Check one: The purpose, function, and nonprofit status of this organization and the exempt status for federal income tax purposes: __ Has Not Changed During Preceding 12 Months __ Has Changed During Preceding 12 Months (publisher must submit explanation of change with this statement) Not applicable 13. Publication Title: REAL SIMPLE 14. Issue Date for Circulation Data Below: September 2019 15. Extent and Nature of Circulation: Average Number of Copies of Each Issue During Preceding 12 Months: a. Total Number of Copies (Net Press Run): 2,224,549 b. Legitimate Paid and/or Requested Distribution (by Mail and Outside the Mail): 1. Outside-County Paid/Requested Mail Subscriptions Stated on PS Form 3541: 1,706,419 2. In-County Paid/Requested Subscriptions Stated on PS Form 3541: 0 3. Sales Through Dealers and Carriers, Street Vendors, Counter Sales, and Other Paid Distribution Outside the USPS: 123,250 4. Requested Copies Distributed by Other Mail Classes Through the USPS: 0 c. Total Paid and/or Requested Circulation: 1,829,669 d. Nonrequested Distribution (by Mail and Outside the Mail): 1. Outside-County Nonrequested Copies Stated on PS Form 3541: 94,194 2. In-County Nonrequested Copies Included on PS Form 3541: 0 3. Nonrequested Copies Distributed Through the USPS by Other Classes of Mail: 0 4. Nonrequested Copies Distributed Outside the Mail: 1,918 e. Total Nonrequested Distribution: 96,112 f. Total Distribution: 1,925,781 g. Copies Not Distributed: 298,768 h. Total: 2,224,549 i. Percent Paid and/or Requested Circulation: 95.01% Number of Copies of Single Issue Published Nearest to Filing Date: a. Total Number of Copies (Net Press Run): 2,272,000 b. Legitimate Paid and/or Requested Distribution (by Mail and Outside the Mail): 1. Outside-County Paid/Requested Mail Subscriptions Stated on PS Form 3541: 1,694,313 2. In-County Paid/Requested Subscriptions Stated on PS Form 3541: 0 3. Sales Through Dealers and Carriers, Street Vendors, Counter Sales, and Other Paid Distribution Outside the USPS: 126,629 4. Requested Copies Distributed by Other Mail Classes Through the USPS: 0 c. Total Paid and/or Requested Circulation: 1,820,942 d. Nonrequested Distribution (by Mail and Outside the Mail): 1. Outside-County Nonrequested Copies Stated on PS Form 3541: 111,568 2. In-County Nonrequested Copies Included on PS Form 3541: 0 3. Nonrequested Copies Distributed Through the USPS by Other Classes of Mail: 0 4. Nonrequested Copies Distributed Outside the Mail: 1,236 e. Total Nonrequested Distribution: 112,804 f. Total Distribution: 1,933,746 g. Copies Not Distributed: 338,254 h. Total: 2,272,000 i. Percent Paid and/or Requested Circulation: 94.17% 16. Not applicable 17. Publication of Statement of Ownership for a Requester Publication is required and will be printed in the November 2019 issue of this publication. 18. Signature and Title of Editor, Publisher, Business Manager, or Owner: Chris Susil, VP/Planning & Analysis. Date: September 19, 2019 I certify that all information furnished on this form is true and complete. I understand that anyone who furnishes false or misleading information on this form or who omits material or information requested on the form may be subject to criminal sanctions (including fines and imprisonment) and/or civil sanctions (including civil penalties).

PRESENTED BY

T O - D O L I S T H A V E Y O U PA R A LY Z E D ? H A N G T H I S H A N D Y B O A R D O N T H E W A L L , T H R O W A D A R T, A N D L E T C H A N C E D E C I D E . B y M e g Fa v re a u

146 REAL SIMPLE NOVEMBER 2019

Illustration by Joel Holland

GOOD FOOD IS T H AT M U C H B E T T E R W I T H G O O D C O M PA N Y.

MADE WITH MILK FROM GRASS-FED COWS T H AT G R A Z E O N T H E LUS H PA ST U RES O F I RE L A N D.

blended makes us better with

HONEY, ROYAL JELLY & PROPOLIS EXTRACTS

REPAIRING HAIRCARE 84% of women saw fewer split ends Blended with purpose. Bringing together lush honey, renowned for replenishment, with royal jelly & propolis extracts, known to nourish and repair.