RS - September 2017 by Lawrence Ambrocio

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BEAUTY BUYS STARTING AT $5

LIFE MADE EASIER

Welcome toYour Organized Home STREAMLINE, MODERNIZE & ENJOY

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DELICIOUS DINNERS MINUS THE GROCERY TRIP

TURN A BAD DAY INTO A GOOD DAY

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Thoughts

“St yle is a universal language, and it has the power to connec t us.”

TRUNK ARCHIVE

—GAR ANCE D ORÉ, Love Style Life

2 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

ILICO •S

BEN • RA

& PA NE

FREE

a m o n t h e s t re e t w i t h my d a u g h t e r, and she’s

trying to tell me about her latest Netflix obsession, which involves a girl and a horse and an island. At least I think it does, but I’m missing every third word, thanks to whooshing buses, barking dogs, and drivers pounding their horns like they were playing whack-a-mole. “Then they—” Arfarfarf! “—a ghost horse but it turns out—” Vrooom! “—because Zoe finds out that—” Hooonk! While the plot points may seem trivial, understanding what my 7-year-old takes away from them, and making sure she feels heard and understood, are certainly not. New York may be the capital of noise, but it hardly has the market cornered. When I lived in Iowa and Texas, there were fewer buses but more loud motorcycles and neighbors “sharing” their band practice with half the block. We often think of noise as simply a nuisance, but it’s possible we should be thinking more about its effect on our minds and bodies, writes Florence Williams in “Reclaim Your Peace and Quiet” (page 116). New research shows that noise pollution can

negatively impact our health—and also affect children’s cognitive performance. It definitely ups my stress level. On a recent date night with my husband, the restaurant noise was sports-stadium-esque. Sure, it’s just one dinner, but these moments matter when your day-to-day at times can feel (to quote the movie Before Sunset) like you’re running a small nursery with someone you used to date. Of course, sometimes the noise is coming from inside the house: the hair dryer, the 24-hour news channels, or the sawing and hammering of a home renovation (if that last one is you, don’t miss “Confessions of a Contractor” on page 41). What kind of day will we have if we can’t ever hear our own thoughts? I always look for a quiet spot in the office when it’s time to read the “Your Words” (page 14) submissions that so many of you are kind enough to send in. I love to hear how Real Simple readers experience things and to see myself in some of the examples. Because in a busy, noisy world, it is our connections with one another that truly elevate our days.

Follow me on Twitter @lyazel

and Instagram @leslieyazel

4 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

Photograph by Rob Howard

F A S H I O N S T Y L I N G B Y A LY S S A D I N E E N ; H A I R B Y M AT T H E W M O N Z O N F O R J E D R O O T ; M A K E U P B Y K AT I E J A N E H U G H E S

E d i t o r ’s N o t e

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Contents September 2017

O N T H E C OV E R

Welcome to your organized home: Streamline, modernize, and enjoy 108 Beauty buys starting at $5

The best way to pocket extra money 101 Delicious dinners minus the grocery trip 128 Turn a bad day into a good day

108 A stylish (but livable!) Los Angeles home

116

128

Finding tranquility in a noisy world

New ways to use old school supplies

Transform your freezer staples

C o v e r P h o t o g r a p h b y C h r i s t o p h e r Te s t a n i Prop St yling by Heather Chontos Set Build by Ready Set Inc.

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

157

SAY OUI

TO THE FRENCH WAY

Look throughout the issue for ways to adopt the French sensibility of embracing simple pleasures and making time for yourself. 53. BEAUTY

Take a cue from the French way of going au naturel and try these simply gorgeous makeup, hair, and nail techniques.

65. FASHION The secret to the effortlessly chic French style starts in your closet. These pare-down tips will make getting dressed in the morning a joy.

157. FOOD You’ll want to spend all your time cooking and eating in your kitchen with these French-inspired décor ideas.

65 ENJOY AN EVERYDAY SIMPLE PLEASURE WITH NEW OUI™ BY YOPLAIT®—FRENCH STYLE YOGURT.

Contents

134

Fall wardrobe upgrades

Empathetic parenting

Work clothes with personality

Thoughts Editor ’s Note Real Simple 24 /7 Yo u r Wo rd s The Short List

2 4 12 14 16

What We Love Coyuchi for Life Eco-friendly linens and more inspiring stuff to check out this month..19 The Staple Molasses New Uses for… School supplies

22 24

Pretty Smart Beauty buys to save your sanity 26 Little Helpers Clever items that make every day better 33

The Realist Caring for Instagram’s Favorite Plant Succulents 101 35 O rg a n i ze T h i s Kids’ desk

Food for Thought Readers reveal how they get their kids talking at the dinner table 50 Pretty Practical Popsicle lips

Trend to Try Crimson

Confessions of a Contractor Home-reno pros share insider intel 41 Things Cooks Know Freezer techniques

Fall MVPs Refresh your autumn wardrobe 60

Relating 5 Excellent Habits to Start When School Does Get the whole family off on the right foot 71 Good Read Celeste Ng discovers surprising artifacts from her house’s past 75 Modern Manners Catherine Newman offers advice on your social quandaries 83

Your Survival Guide for Stressed Skin Tamp down breakouts, rashes, and more 54

The Vets Will See You Now Your pet problems, solved

Now What?!? Solutions for life’s mini disasters

What Child Is This? Raising a kid who’s your polar opposite 89

Balance How to Keep Finances Straight (Without Driving Each Other Crazy) Splitting bills with the people you live with 97 Earn Money in Your Free Time All about the side hustle

101

How They Do It Five VIPs on handling weekend email 104 Ahhh

107

Features Make Yourself at Home Emily Henderson’s inviting L.A. abode 108 Reclaim Your Peace and Quiet Our increasingly noisy world is taking a toll on our health. How to deal with the din 116

When Fresh Met Freezer Frozen staples get a makeover in these gorgeous dishes 128 Work It Basic but not boring: daywear classics with a twist 134

Food 5 Easy Dinners

142

Road Test Noodles

152

Big Batch Bean burritos

154

Make It Yourself Birthday cake

156

The Struggle Is Real 158 Rituals 162

REAL SIMPLE® (ISSN 1528-1701) IS PUBLISHED MONTHLY BY TIME INC. PRINCIPAL OFFICE: 225 LIBERTY STREET, NEW YORK, NY 10281. PERIODICALS POSTAGE PAID AT NEW YORK, NY, AND ADDITIONAL MAILING OFFICES. POSTMASTER: SEND ALL UAA TO CFS (SEE DMM 507.1.5.2); NON-POSTAL AND MILITARY FACILITIES: SEND ADDRESS CORRECTIONS TO REAL SIMPLE MAGAZINE, P.O. BOX 62120, TAMPA, FL 33662-2120. CANADA POST PUBLICATIONS MAIL AGREEMENT NO. 40110178. RETURN UNDELIVERABLE CANADA ADDRESSES TO: POSTAL STN. A, P.O. BOX 4015, TORONTO, ON M5W 2T2. GST#888381621RT0001. SUBSCRIBERS: IF THE POSTAL SERVICE ALERTS US THAT YOUR MAGAZINE IS UNDELIVERABLE, WE HAVE NO FURTHER OBLIGATION UNLESS WE RECEIVE A CORRECTED ADDRESS WITHIN TWO YEARS. U.S. SUBSCRIPTIONS: $28.95 FOR ONE YEAR. YOUR BANK MAY PROVIDE UPDATES TO THE CARD INFORMATION WE HAVE ON FILE. YOU MAY OPT OUT OF THIS SERVICE AT ANY TIME. MAILING LIST: WE MAKE A PORTION OF OUR MAILING LIST AVAILABLE TO REPUTABLE FIRMS. CUSTOMER SERVICE AND SUBSCRIPTIONS: FOR 24/7 SERVICE, PLEASE USE OUR WEBSITE, REALSIMPLE.COM/CUSTOMERSERVICE. YOU CAN ALSO CALL 1-800-881-1172 OR WRITE TO REAL SIMPLE AT P.O. BOX 62120, TAMPA, FL 336622120. © 2017 TIME INC. FOR INTERNATIONAL LICENSING AND SYNDICATION REQUESTS, PLEASE VISIT HTTP://WWW.TIMEINC.COM/SYNDICATION OR CALL 1-212-522-5868. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. REPRODUCTION IN WHOLE OR IN PART WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION IS PROHIBITED. REAL SIMPLE® IS A REGISTERED TRADEMARK OF TIME INC. VOLUME 18, ISSUE 9. PRINTED IN THE U.S.A.

10 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

Because Molly needs a forever home.

2017 Explorer. Always unstoppable.

Real Simple 24/7 FOLLOW US ONLINE FOR EXCLUSIVE

I D E A S , T I P S , A N D WAY S T O M A K E L I F E E A S I E R — E V E R Y D A Y.

MEET

W E N DY G R A NGE R P H OTO E D I TO R AT R E A L S I M P L E . C O M

My favorite photographer: Lately I’ve been head over heels for Maria Svarbova’s In the Swimming Pool photo series. Photos I like to take: Architectural details, fruits and vegetables, and my cat. Always my cat.

Go to realsimple .com/foldasheet.

Why I love fall: I get to wear my favorite item of clothing: jackets!

A GARDEN SNAP This spot at Lotusland in Montecito, California, caught Wendy’s eye.

@WENDYL AVONNE ON INSTAGRAM

#REALSIMPLE Got some great photos of fall foliage, seasonal comfort food, or your autumn road trip? Share them with us by tagging #realsimple on Instagram and we might regram one.

An easy dessert Having guests over tonight? A dump cake will do the trick. The idea is that you throw all the ingredients in a dish and bake, with little mixing required. Check out our recipes at realsimple.com/dumpcakes.

12 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

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TWITTER @REALSIMPLE

FAC E B O O K @REALSIMPLE

S N A P C H AT @REALSIMPLEMAG

I N S TA G R A M @ R E A L _S I M P L E

C LO C K W I S E F R O M TO P R I G H T : C O U RT E SY O F R E A L S I M P L E . C O M ; P H OTO G R A P H BY CA I T L I N B E N S E L , F O O D ST Y L I N G BY C H E L S E A Z I M M E R , P R O P ST Y L I N G BY C L A I R E S P O L L EN ; R O S S N EG L I A ; W E N DY G R A N G E R

THE RIGHT FIT

If you’ve ever tried to fold a fitted sheet, you know how crazy-making it is. Watch our video for a method that really works.

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THE REALIST

Yo u r W o r d s

How do you turn around a bad day?

I play the tuba! H ow c a n yo u p o s s i b l y h ave a b a d d ay w h e n p l ay i n g th e t u b a ? ARIEL D OWNING, SHERIDAN, W YOMING

# W O M E N I R L “ T H AT F E E L I N G W H E N Y O U BUY CUPCAKES FOR THE OFFICE AND DROP THEM RIGHT BEFORE YOU GE T THERE.” @LIZ ZIERHO

Journaling usually helps. CL AIRE ALE XIS BARDEN, LOWELL , MAS SACHUSE T TS

Controlled breathing. I learned this from a friend years ago, and it serves me so well. Breathe in slowly for four counts and out for four counts at the same speed, then increase by one for each round until you reach 10. Allow your mind to focus on the numbers. You can start back at four if you have time. BE TSY BOYER, NORMANDY PARK , WASHINGTON

I make myself a nice, large cup of coffee and, while drinking it, think of all the people I am lucky to have in my life. RIVK AH FELMAN, TE ANECK , NE W JERSEY

If I have a lousy day at work, I love to go home and cook. Using my creativity in the kitchen helps me relax and think through whatever is causing the stress.

I’ll pick up a copy of one of my favorite books and reread only the best chapters. @FINDINGSYDNEY

I make a trip to my local animal shelter and spend time talking to and petting the dogs and cats waiting to be adopted. Very relaxing for me and enjoyed by them. RITA MAGURNO, WAVERLY, NE W YORK

CARRIE MIHALKO, M C KEESP ORT, PENNSYLVANIA

I put the electronics away and go play outside with my kids. I t i s a m a z i n g w h at a g a m e of ta g c a n d o fo r th e s o u l . J E SS I C A D E R I , S P O K A N E , WA S H I N G TO N

14 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

When we are having a bad day, my family calls a do-over.

I turn on my favorite music when I get home and dance around the apartment in my jammies! MAGGIE R., LOUISVILLE, KENTUCKY

If things are going wrong, negative thoughts and feelings can begin to pile up. A do-over gives everyone a chance to start fresh. Sometimes that’s all we need to feel more positive and move forward.

I do something I can control, like make my bed, clean the kitchen, or straighten out a drawer.

L AURA HANEY, PHIL ADELPHIA

These mundane tasks help me organize my thoughts, feel like I can manage, and give me some quiet.

STACY L. SMITH, BOSTON

AMY M C CARTHY, BIRMINGHAM, AL ABAMA

I say a quick prayer and move on.

I reread my worn copy of Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by Judith Viorst. It helps me remember we all have days, and that makes it easier to tackle what I need to do.

Dinner Made Simple 35 Everyday Ingredients, 350 Easy Recipes by the Editors of

The women who shared the photos in this column will receive our book Dinner Made Simple. Tag Instagram posts with #WOMENIRL to be considered for future columns.

ANNE CURTIN, LINO L AKES, MINNESOTA

I look for a perfect patch of green grass, lie down in it, and watch the clouds pass by. Research says being in nature may lower stress. @LIFEST YLEDITOR

# W O M E N I R L “ THE Y WERE COMPE TING TO S EE W H O C O U L D W E A R E AC H OT H ER O U T T H E M O S T. T W O K I D S I N B E D B Y 6 : 4 5 P. M . , S O S U R V E Y S AY S T H E P A R E N T S W O N . ” @ C A R O L I N E AT O N

To get myself out of the dumps, I make a stepby-step plan. When everything seems overwhelming and depressing, I focus on small things. The plan can be as simple as taking a shower, getting coffee, and calling a friend. Pretty soon life starts to feel more together, and I can overcome the road block of the blahs.

I’m a big believer in faking it until you make it. I p u t a b i g s m i l e o n my fa c e , a n d i n a few m i nu te s my d ay i s b et te r. A P R I L T O KO, B O U N T I F U L , U TA H

AL ANA JUNE DUNN, MERIDIAN, IDAHO

I go for a run. It gives me time to think, or not think, whichever is right for that day. @TGRUNFIT

NEXT QUESTION... What is your favorite holiday shopping tactic? Visit realsimple .com/yourwords and let us know your answer to this question. Your response could appear on these pages.

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

The Short List F I V E B O O K S T H AT W O N ’ T D I S A P P O I N T By Nora Hor vath

Thoughtful gift

Great for book club

Love Found is a compilation of poetry that covers all stages of romance, from early lust to longterm partnership. Filled with touching words from 50 poems, including selections by Emily Dickinson and E.E. Cummings, this collection makes a sweet keepsake for someone you care about.

Jojo, the 13-yearold protagonist of Jesmyn Ward’s Sing, Unburied, Sing, lives in Mississippi, caring for his young sister, sick grandmother, and drug-addicted mother. With lyrical, observant prose, the National Book Award–winning writer pays homage to William Faulkner’s As I Lay Dying. As the family roadtrips to reunite with Jojo’s incarcerated father, Ward touches on racial injustices and growing up in an unforgiving America.

Gripping page-turner Three years after their daughter Madison goes missing in a remote forest in Oregon, the Culvers are exhausted by countless failed police searches. In a desperate attempt to bring their girl home, they hire a private investigator, Naomi. In The Child Finder, her second novel, Rene Denfeld tells the chilling story of Naomi’s search for Madison and own struggle with past demons.

Foodie novel The lighthearted Sourdough follows Lois Clary, a software engineer whose only reprieve from her demanding job is the soup and sandwich she orders each night from a nearby restaurant. When she is gifted the chef’s sourdough starter and begins to bake as a hobby, she encounters a mysterious underground group of food innovators. As he did in Mr. Penumbra’s 24-Hour Bookstore, Robin Sloan will have readers looking for magic in the mundane.

Agricultural exposé In Big Chicken, journalist Maryn McKenna investigates the widespread use of antibiotics in the poultry-farming industry to answer the question, Are mass-produced meats a threat to public health? In her report, McKenna reveals the harrowing consequences of these farming practices on our lives—particularly the rise of antibiotic resistance—and explains how we can eat healthier and more safely.

P R O P ST Y L I N G BY R E B EC CA B A RTO S H E S KY

For more book recommendations, visit realsimple.com/books.

16 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

Photograph by Alice Gao

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NATIONAL TV

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The card that takes you there. It’s Simple: Get the Capital One® Venture® card to earn unlimited double miles on every purchase, every day & use those ĥġĤĝī ĞħĪ ęĦı ǎ ġğĠĬ ħĦ ęĦı ęġĪĤġĦĝ

E V E RY T H I N G O U R E D I T O R S A R E B U Z Z I N G A B O U T T H I S M O N T H

C OY U C H I F O R L I F E

P R O P ST Y L I N G BY R E B EC CA B A RTO S H E S KY

Because nothing beats a fluffy new towel: This premium-linen subscription service will send you a set of organic cotton towels (or sheets or a duvet) every six, 12, or 24 months. Best of all, it will also upcycle or recycle your old textiles. TO BUY: From $5 per month; coyuchi.com.

By Stephanie Sisco Photograph by Alice Gao

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

W H AT W E LO V E

THE BAL ANCE JOURNAL

L A N G UA G E L E S S O N

This felt-covered notebook features encouragement for both mindfulness and productivity. Use the labeled “do” pages to make lists and plans and the “undo” pages for creative contemplation. The journal invites you to rate your work each week and offers regular mindfulness exercises to help you break free from the daily grind. TO BUY: $35; liveundo.com.

GIFS AREN’T JUST FOR LAUGHS ANYMORE: USE THE REPEATING IMAGES TO LEARN SIGN LANGUAGE AT GIPHY.COM/ SIGN-WITH-ROBERT.

# 50 S TAT E S 4 K I D S CHALLENGE

SEPTEMBER IS CHILDHOOD CANCER AWARENESS MONTH, SO ALL MONTH LONG THE COOKIES FOR KIDS’ CANCER CHARITY WILL BE ENLISTING VOLUNTEERS TO JOIN ITS 50-STATE CHALLENGE. THE GOAL: HAVE AT LEAST ONE PERSON IN EVERY STATE HOST AN EVENT TO RAISE MONEY FOR AND AWARENESS OF PEDIATRIC CANCER. CLAIM YOUR STATE AT COOKIESFOR KIDSCANCER.ORG AND CLICK ON “REGISTER A FUNDRAISER” TO SIGN UP.

BR ANDLESS P RO D U C T S

W I L L & G R AC E

Eleven years after its finale, the seminal sitcom is making a comeback. The 12-episode encore begins on NBC September 28.

GO OD ZEBR A SPIRIT ANIMAL CR ACKERS

Shaped like “spirit animals” instead of circus animals, these crackers offer a twist on the classic treat. All 11 shapes (think unicorns and peacocks) are inspired by tattoo art and come in sophisticated flavors, like lemon, chai, and vanilla. TO BUY: $29 for 12 snack packs; goodzebra.com.

20 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

W I L L & G R AC E , C H R I S H A STO N / N B C ; P R O D U CT I M AG E S C O U RT E SY O F M A N U FACT U R E R S

Find quality beauty, home-care, and packaged-food products for $3 or less at brandless .com. For every order that’s placed, the company will donate a meal to the Feeding America food banks.

WELCOME TO THE TEA HOUSE. PREMIUM ORGANIC TEA. EXQUISITE INGREDIENTS. EXTRAORDINARY TASTE. Also available in these ﬂavors: Sicilian Lemon & Honeysuckle

• Valencia Orange Peel • Wild Blackberry & Sage

W H AT W E LO V E

Quick Ideas

The Staple It’s what gives crispy gingersnaps their deep amber shade and caramelized flavor. But M O L A S S E S , the syrup that remains when you separate sugar crystals from boiled sugarcane juice, isn’t just for winter baking. Use it to sweeten cocktails or add depth to roasted sweet potatoes. It’s also the perfect complement to coffee in tiramisu. Look for mild, unsulfured varieties and avoid blackstrap, which can have an overpowering flavor. Coat measuring cups and spoons with nonstick cooking spray to help the syrup slide out with ease.

1 MOL ASSES-SPICED SPIKED CIDER

Combine 4 cups apple cider, 3 Tbsp. molasses, 2 cinnamon sticks, a 1-in. piece of ginger, and 1 sliced orange in a medium saucepan. Cover and simmer for 20 minutes. cup rum or Stir in bourbon. Serve warm. Serves 8. 2 SPICY MOL ASSESROA S T E D S W E E T P OTATO E S

Cut 3 sweet potatoes into 24 wedges. Toss with 2 Tbsp. each olive oil and molasses, 1 Tbsp. apple cider vinegar, 1 sliced jalapeño, and 1 tsp. each grainy mustard and kosher salt. Roast at 425°F until tender, 20 to 22 minutes. Serves 4.

Beat 1 cup each heavy cream and mascarpone with cup each powdered sugar and molasses to form medium peaks. Dip 24 ladyfingers in 1 cups cooled coffee. Layer with cream mixture in a 2-qt. baking dish; refrigerate for 4 hours. Dust with cocoa powder. Serves 8.

By Grace Elkus Recipes by Adam Dolge and Grace Elkus

22 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

Photograph by Alice Gao

P R O P ST Y L I N G BY R E B EC CA B A RTO S H E S KY

3 MOL ASSES TIR AMISU

HOW TO MAKE REAL FRUIT JUMP FOR JOY. ®

®/TM trademarks ©Mars, Incorporated 2017

Cover it with silky smooth DOVE Chocolate and discover an explosion of ﬂavor in every bite.

CHOOSE PLEASURE

W H AT W E LO V E

N ew Us e s fo r. . .

School Supplies GIVE CL A SSRO OM E SSENTIAL S (A PENCIL, AN ER A SER, A RULER) A NE W ASSIGNMENT WITH THESE HOUSEHOLD HACKS. By Brandi Broxson

PL ANT MARKER

FEELING THE BACKTO - S C H O O L C H A O S ? Get a list of these ideas and organize your family’s schedule with Cozi, a free shared calendar and list app from Time Inc. (available for iOS and Android).

Kids will have fun using a ruler to track a plant’s growth from seedling to adult. (Label the blank side with the plant’s name.) Also stakes plants that need support, like tomatoes.

K E Y LU B R I C A N T Rub the tip of a pencil on a stubborn key’s teeth. The graphite greases the metal, allowing the key to turn more easily. Works well on difficult zippers, too.

FR AME HELPER Crooked frame? Help it grip the wall by gluing a couple of small erasers to the lower backside corners. Use scissors to snip the rubber tops off old pencils.

For more new uses for old things, visit realsimple.com/101nuot.

24 RE AL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

Photographs by Corey Olsen

W H AT W E LO V E

Pretty Smart A M O R E P O T E N T FA C E M I S T A N D S E V E N O T H E R B E AU T Y B U Y S TO S AV E YO U R S A N I T Y By Heather Muir Maffei

C U LT FAV O R I T E This month, we’re loving new versions of classics.

JURLIQUE RO S E WAT E R BAL ANCING MIST INTENSE

26 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

P R O P ST Y L I N G BY R E B EC CA B A RTO S H E S KY

This limited-edition bottle is double the size of the original, and it contains four more rose varieties to soothe and smooth. Spritz onto clean skin, after applying makeup, or whenever you need a hydrating boost. TO BUY: $65; skinstore.com.

Photograph by Alice Gao

W H AT W E LO V E

In 30 shades, this foundation mimics lipids in your skin, so it blends seamlessly (no settling!). TO BUY: $34 each; sephora.com. F R E S H S U GA R CREAM LIP T R E AT M E N T I N B A BY

Addicted to the classic Sugar Lip Treatment? You can now reap the same nourishing benefits of grapeseed and avocado oils in a cushiony petal-pink gloss. TO BUY: $24; fresh.com. L’ O R É A L PA R I S P U R E - C L AY CLEANSER E U C A LY P T U S

Detox congested post-summer skin: This soap-free eucalyptus-and-clay cleanser sucks out dirt and oil for a clean, matte finish. TO BUY: $7; lorealparisusa.com. S EC R E T I N V I S I B L E S P R AY

The same sweat protection and odor-neutralizing technology as always, now in a convenient spray. Hold six inches away and mist— no white residue. TO BUY: $5; at drugstores.

28 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

The OG of face oil, this golden elixir now contains healing geranium oil and zesty orange flower absolute for the ultimate skin treat. TO BUY: $170; olio lusso.com. MALIN + GOETZ DA R K RU M E AU D E PA R F U M

A richer, longerlasting take on the best-selling Dark Rum mist, this unisex parfum has an addictive blend of bergamot, plum, leather, rum, and patchouli. TO BUY: $165; malin andgoetz.com. BENEFIT BOI-ING A I R B RU S H CONCEALER

The 10-hour, waterproof coverage that hides dark circles and brown spots now comes in a lighter texture that doesn’t crease or crack. TO BUY: $20; benefit cosmetics.com.

P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U F A C T U R E R S . S M E A R S , F R O M T O P : J O N PAT E R S O N ; G R E G M A R I N O ; B R I A N H E N N

BAREMINER AL S B A R E P RO PERFORMANCE WEAR LIQUID F O U N DAT I O N

RO D I N O L I O LU S S O GER ANIUM & O R A N G E B LO S S O M LUXU RY FA C E O I L

Drench your skin in the new wave of super hydration. Neutrogena Hydro Boost Water Gel and now, new Hydrating Cleansing Gel ®

Nothing does more for thirsty skin than hydration. That’s why our clinically proven formulas lock in hydration with hyaluronic acid. This advanced ingredient holds up to 1000X its weight in water. Skin is so supple and hydrated, it bounces back. See what’s possible. Learn more at neutrogena.com/hydroboost

W H AT W E LO V E

A RO M AT I C S U R FA C E S P R AY

This all-natural option gets its cleaning power from essential oils (like grapefruit and spruce) and castile soap. It works on countertops, floors, and just about anything else. Comes in three spa-like scents. TO BUY: Saint Olio cleaner, $20 for 16 oz.; saintolio.com.

CEREAL CLEANER UPPER

Save on paper towels with this lightweight lithium wet/ dry hand vacuum. Perfect for gooey messes, it can hold up to six ounces of liquid. TO BUY: Wet/dry cordless vacuum, $45; blackanddecker.com.

Little Helpers S I X S M A RT P RO D U C T S TO MAKE YOUR LIFE E A SIER By Brandi Broxson

P R E T T Y P I L L B OX B A C K PA C K C ATC H A L L

Stow your child’s number-two pencils in this handy threein-one plastic container. The lid includes a built-in pencil sharpener, and the bottom twists off to store erasers and other small supplies. TO BUY: CRG2 Stow-It storage container, $9; officedepot.com.

C O U RT E SY O F M A N U FACT U R E R S

P ROJ EC TO R TO G O

Screen movies or share vacation photos with this two-inch portable wonder. It easily connects to phones, laptops, tablets, and gaming consoles to project a 120-inch display onto a wall or other surface. TO BUY: RIF6 Cube, $250; amazon.com.

Discreetly store prescriptions or vitamins in a case no bigger than an iPhone. Includes inset mirror, seven-day compartments, and a top cover that closes snugly. TO BUY: Port and Polish pillbox, $15; portandpolishco.com.

EC O - F R I E N D LY D I N N E RWA R E

Elevate your party table with these colorful and compostable disposables. Made from sturdy sugarcane, the plates are durable for heavy fare. In four designs. TO BUY: Eco Colors, $4.50 to $7.50 for packs of 15 to 24; ecoproductsstore.com.

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

#LiveTheGoodLight

Transitions® lenses seamlessly adapt to the perfect tint, in any light. Plus, they help protect from UV rays and harmful blue light from digital devices, and especially bright sun. Find an eyecare professional near you at Transitions.com

Transitions, the swirl and Transitions Adaptive Lenses are registered trademarks of Transitions Optical, Inc., used under license by Transitions Optical Limited. Live the Good Light is a trademark of Transitions Optical Limited. ©2017 Transitions Optical Limited. Photochromic performance is inﬂuenced by temperature, UV exposure and lens material.

U N C O M M O N S O L U T I O N S T O E V E RY D AY P R O B L E M S

C A R IN G FO R IN STAG R A M’S FAVO R ITE PL A NT By Brandi Broxson

We have interior designers to thank for the succulent boom. “They love them for their varying textures and colors,” says Robin Stockwell, author of Succulents: The Ultimate Guide to Choosing, Designing, and Growing 200 Easy-Care Plants. Even better, succulents are generally low-maintenance. Just water once every week or two and opt for a pot with drainage to prevent root rot. (Make sure you read the care instructions.) If you’ll be keeping your plant in a cubicle or low-sun room, go for a green variety, like the jade plant or miniature aloe. Colored succulents, like the echeveria Perle von Nürnberg pictured here, do best outdoors or on a windowsill where they can soak up two to three hours of direct sunlight every day.

K A AT Z O E T E K O U W / S T O C K S Y

Learn how to make pretty paper succulents at realsimple.com/papersucculent.

For mom’s birthday, they frosted

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THE REALIST

Organize This I N N E E D O F A S M A RT E R KIDS’ DESK SETUP? CLEA SHEARER AND JOANNA TEPLIN, COFOUNDERS OF T H E H O M E E D I T, S C H O O L U S I N T H E I R S T R AT E G I E S .

1 E L E VAT E S U P P L I E S

Help keep the desktop clear by stashing grab-and-go items, like scissors and spare tape, on a pegboard or open shelves. TO BUY: Peg-It-All storage panel, from $100; kreisdesign.com. 2 E L I M I N AT E E X T R A S

Whether they’re pens and pencils or notebooks and erasers, edit out supplies that have seen better days. Having fewer items in the rotation will reduce clutter and stop it from spreading to the rest of your house. TO BUY: Mint signature ballpoint pens, $12 for 12; poppin.com.

3 SIZE UP

Choose a piece of furniture that will continue to work as your student grows. Seek out an option with ample drawer storage to avoid surface clutter. 2

4 E S TA B L I S H O R D E R

Set up simple systems for your kids to follow: a tray for paper, a spot for books, a folder for finished projects. If everything is easy to find and put away, children are less likely to create a mess. 5 P U RG E T H E PA P E R

Reduce the amount of paper that piles up by employing an app like Artkive (artkiveapp.com), which stores digital versions of your child’s artwork. Get inspired to create your own desk accessories at realsimple.com/diydesk.

P h o to g ra p h by J o n ny Va l i a n t

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

Tips for a

STRESS-FREE School Year

Start the new season with a clean slate. These simple organization tools will help set you and your little ones up for success.

1 S H O E H O LDE R Never worry about running out of supplies again. The plastic slots keep items orderly and make it easy to see what you have and what you need.

2 PA PE R O R GA N I Z E R Keep a stacked paper organizer by the front door so the kids remember to drop off important documents. Designate levels by purpose: directory, holiday calendar, medical forms.

3 S N AC K S POT Stop the daily argument over the afterschool snack by keeping a bin stocked with pre-packaged, parent-approved favorites likes pretzels, trail mix, and fruit leathers.

4 S O RT I N G STAT I O N S For them: add a sorting bin to your laundry room so the kids learn to separate whites, colors, and darks. For you: keep a powerful detergent like ARM & HAMMER™ Plus OxiClean™ Liquid Laundry Detergent on hand that can help get out many stains that come your way, from jelly to grass stains.

For more tips that make life easier, visit realsimple.com/armandhammer

SMART SOLVES Organizing for Success

Flip the page for must-know tips that will help get this school year started on the right foot and keep it running smoothly

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THE REALIST

Confessions of a Contractor

BEFORE YOU E VEN THINK OF WORKING W I T H A R E N OVAT I O N P RO, C O N S I D E R THIS INSIDER INTEL F RO M O U R PA N E L O F E X P E RT CONTR ACTORS. By Jessica Dodd

Q: What are the most common mistakes people make when choosing a contractor? A: Number one: choosing the contractor based solely on price. It may make your wallet happy, but the lowest bid isn’t always the best. Number two: not checking references and inspecting the contractor’s work. The truth is that any joe can shell out a few hundred dollars and put together a website that will impress you. But you’ll never know whether he’s any good without seeing past projects—and that means visiting a previous client and running your hands over the counters and opening and closing drawers.

Illustrations by Andreas Samuelsson

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

THE REALIST

Q: What’s a sure sign at the start of a project that you’ve hired a good contractor? A: Is he reachable when you need him? How long does it take him to respond to an email? How good is he at taking notes? What does the work site look like the first few days he’s in your home? Do your personalities click? If you’re happy with the answers to all these questions, you’ve made a smart hire.

Q: Why do bids often vary wildly in price? How negotiable are they? A: It can be confusing when one contractor quotes you a certain price while another quotes you a price double that. The bottom line is that a contractor’s experience, the quality of her work, and even the size of her office factor into what she’ll charge. A company with dozens of employees and a big, fancy office will charge more. Some contractors may take shortcuts, so their bids are lower, but you could end up paying more in repairs down the road. Generally, bids aren’t negotiable. If you want to work with a specific contractor but can’t afford to, discuss scaling back the project a little or using less expensive materials so the price fits your budget. Finally, never—and we mean never—pay in full until every last bit of the job, down to that final doorknob, is complete.

Learn how to patch small holes in drywall on your own at realsimple.com/drywall.

Q: What’s the best way to check a contractor’s reputability? A: Good old word of mouth is a great starting point. Ask your friends for recommendations. Next, check the largest, most established referral service you can find (think Angie’s List). Once you’ve narrowed down the possibilities to a few names, visit your municipality’s website to check local records and confirm that each contractor is licensed, bonded, and insured and doesn’t have any unsettled disputes.

Q: On the flip side, what’s a sign that the work might be shoddy? A: It can be hard to know during demolition how good your contractor’s work is. So instead consider how she communicates with you. If she’s careful to return your emails and answer all your questions, she’s probably just as conscientious about her handiwork. One red flag: Your contractor asks you to get permits. In most areas, you have to be a licensed contractor to pull a permit, so this request may be a sign that she doesn’t have a license or that it has lapsed. And be wary of any contractor who demands a giant deposit early on. Some don’t require any money up front; others might ask for as much as 30 percent on signing the contract. Any more is highway robbery. Q: Why does a project often take longer than expected? A: Sometimes a contractor will open up a wall or remove old fixtures and discover a nasty surprise—maybe rot, a bug infestation, or improper framing. Cleaning up those messes can add days, if not weeks, to a job. Another cause for a delay could be a client who changes her mind. Getting in new material or changing an order takes time. That said, there are contractors who take on too many projects at once or hire subcontractors who don’t stick to a schedule or who even stop showing up at all. More reasons to research your contractor ahead of time!

Q: What’s the typical markup on materials? A: Expect markup to be anywhere from 15 to 50 percent. If that seems steep, consider that a contractor is charging you the markup on discounted prices; contractors are tradespeople and can buy materials more cheaply than you can. Contractors are essentially acting as the manufacturer, so if something breaks or the product arrives damaged, they are responsible for fixing or replacing it. That’s not the case for items you buy on your own. Q: How often will my contractor be on the job? If I want to see him personally and not just his workers, should I establish that up front? A: Depending on the size of the company, the person you hired may not be the one showing up at your work site every day. Instead, you’ll work with a supervisor or project manager— and that’s a good thing, because he’ll know way more about your project than the big boss ever will. You should be able to reach your contractor easily if you have a question or problem, though. Lay down your expectations at the beginning of the job so you’re not disappointed. Q: What projects should always be handled by a pro? A: DIY projects involving electrical, plumbing, or an HVAC (heating and cooling) system can be dangerous. Install electrical improperly and you could start a fire. Screw up your plumbing and you could end up with a flood or sewage up to your elbows. Mess with your HVAC system and you could inadvertently fill your home with poisonous carbon monoxide. And be warned that some contractors may shy away from taking a job that involves fixing a failed DIY experiment—it’s simply not worth the hassle. For these types of projects, hire a professional from the get-go.

OUR EXPERTS KATHY CUPPY, CO-OWNER OF ALL PHASE GROUP INC., INDIANAPOLIS ● ROBI KIRSIC, PRESIDENT OF TIMELINE RENOVATIONS INC., NEW YORK CITY ● TOM MILLER, PRESIDENT OF THE NATIONAL AS SOCIATION OF THE REMODELING INDUSTRY AND OWNER OF TOM MILLER REMODELING INC., PORTLAND, OREGON

42 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

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THE REALIST

Things Cooks Know ST R AT EG I E S, T EC H N I Q U E S, A N D T I P S A B O U T FREEZING—F RO M T H E R E A L S I M P L E TE ST KITCHEN TO YOUR S

By Grace Elkus

Making the Most of Your Freezer Follow these tips to turn the deep freeze from a black hole to a source of weeknight dinner inspiration. (Plus, you won’t have to dig to find the ice cream.)

To keep cold air circulating, store food away from freezer vents.

Reserve the bottom shelf for heavier items that could leak, such as meat and casseroles. Use the top shelf for more delicate items, like sliced bread, ice cream, and bags of fruits and veggies.

Three Tricks for Labeling Remove store-bought items from bulky packaging, place in bags, and label with heating instructions. Use a shoebox or clear container for smaller items, such as Parmesan rinds or vegetable scraps for stock.

Store food in gallon-size plastic freezer bags (different from plastic storage bags, which are thinner and less protective) or square storage containers, which fit snugly into corners.

Save the door shelf (the warmest part of the freezer) for flours and nuts, which can go rancid at room temperature. The door is also the best place for bottles of booze.

1 A permanent marker or freezer tape (which won’t come loose in the cold) is your best bet for clear, legible freezer labels. If using tape, dog-ear a small corner before sticking it on the container so it’s easy to peel off later. 2 The ideal label should include the name of the dish, the date, heating instructions, and discard date. Arrange items so all labels are facing outward.

How to Freeze Soups to Maximize Storage Space

1 Once they’ve cooled, pour into gallon-size plastic freezer bags, leaving a little extra room at the top (liquids expand as they freeze). Squeeze out any air and seal shut.

48 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

2 Label the bags, then place in a single layer on a baking sheet and freeze until solid. This will keep the bags from wrapping around the wire shelving.

3 Remove the tray and stack bags until ready to thaw. Or store them upright.

3 If you’re big on meal prep, keep a freezer inventory checklist in the kitchen—or, better yet, on the freezer door. When you pull out dinner, cross it off.

Illustrations by Brown Bird Design

THE REALIST

Fo o d fo r T h o u g ht

How do you get your kids talking at the table?

P L AY GA M E S

LE AH SAWYER, HUNTSVILLE, AL ABAMA

MARY VOISEY, RED OND O BE ACH, CALIFORNIA

M A K E ’ E M L AU G H

I N C LU D E OT H E R S

G E T D E TA I L S

If there is a lack of enthusiasm, we ask what was one funny thing that happened at school that day. It usually starts the conversation, and then we go from there.

It’s super important that we teach them to ask us about our day, to show interest in and empathy for others. Asking questions about the people in their lives— friends, teachers— reinforces the idea that others’ feelings are important. The first time my son asked his grandma, “How was your day?” I almost cried.

We ask who they sat with, who they played with at recess, what happened on the bus, etc. Specific questions are sure to get them talking!

ALICIA GE ARHART, QUEENSTOWN, MARYL AND

K ATE BALL , TOWSON, MARYL AND

For more conversation starters, visit realsimple.com/kidsconvo.

ALE X DIL ZER THOMP SON, E XTON, PENNSYLVANIA

M A A H O O / STO C K SY

K E E P I T C A S UA L

I’ve found, at least with my child, that asking a direct question puts him on the spot, and he will shut down. So we tend to open conversations with our own stories.

Our daughter made a game at school to play at the dinner table. She filled a bag with slips of paper containing a bunch of topics. At dinner, we take turns picking out a topic and discussing it. It’s one of my daughter’s favorite things to do at the table, and the game is easy to make.

Prett y Practical

Popsicle Lips FA D E D L I P S T I C K I S N O L O N G E R A M A K E U P FA I L . T H I S L I V E D - I N C H E R RY S TA I N D O E S N ’ T R E Q U I R E T O U C H - U P S O R T E E T H - C H E C K I N G . PA I R I T W I T H F R E S H S K I N A N D YO U ’ L L B E C O A S T I N G F RO M S U M M E R I N T O FA L L . B y C h e l s e a Tr a b e r B u r n s

52 RE AL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

Photograph by Thomas Slack

H A I R B Y N AT E R O S E N K R A N Z AT H O N E Y A R T I S T S ; M A K E U P B Y L I S E T G A R Z A AT T H E WA L L G R O U P

THE REALIST

RU N WAY I N S P I R AT I O N

Models at Public School Fall/Winter 2017 showed off a low-maintenance approach to lipstick: a pink stain that looks like it was applied with fingers.

CONCEAL

1 POLISH R U N WAY, M AT T E O VA L L E / I M A X T R E E . C O M ; L I P S M E A R , G R E G M A R I N O ; F O U N D AT I O N S M E A R , J E F F W E ST B R O O K ; P R O D U CT I M AG E S C O U RT E SY O F M A N U FACT U R E R S

Matte formulas tend to draw attention to dry flakes, so it’s worth the extra prep step to ensure a smooth canvas. Gently massage a sugar scrub into lips using circular motions for 30 seconds, then tissue off. Try Sara Happ The Lip Scrub in Pink Grapefruit ($22; sarahapp .com) or DIY with one tablespoon coconut oil, two tablespoons sugar, and a half tablespoon warm water.

Since you won’t be covering your lips with an even coat of lipstick, it’s key to tone down your natural lip color. Doing so helps you get the true color you see in the tube, and it gives the lipstick something to grip onto, meaning it will actually last through your latte. Using a makeup sponge, pat a dab of your regular base (tinted moisturizer, liquid foundation) over your lips to create a thin veil.

3 PAT

Choose a matte stain or sheer liquid lipstick. Both sink into lips, leaving zero gloss or goop for a natural finish. The model (opposite page) is wearing Nars Velvet Lip Glide in Mineshaft ($26; sephora .com). Instead of applying lipstick from the tube, put a dab onto your index finger and press it into the center of your lips. Then softly blend it out to the edges for a diffused look. For another DIY lip scrub recipe, go to realsimple.com/ diyscrub.

NATURAL BEAUTY

THE FRENCH WAY

Go au naturel with these makeup and hair tips inspired by the eﬀortless beauty routines of French women. Bonus? They’ll save time in the morning.

MAKEUP Focus on one area, like a red lip, and keep everything else simple.

HAIR Au revoir, heat styling. Go for a chignon or tousled undone waves.

NAILS For a real French mani, skip the salon appointment and go for neutral polish.

ENJOY AN EVERYDAY SIMPLE PLEASURE WITH NEW OUI™ BY YOPLAIT®—FRENCH STYLE YOGURT.

THE REALIST

E V E N I F YO U ’ R E A WO R L D C H A M P at pasting on a smile and hiding how worried you feel, you could be wearing a bad day all over your skin. Stress can cause acne breakouts—this, you know— and ﬂare-ups of skin conditions like atopic dermatitis (a.k.a. eczema), rosacea, and psoriasis. One reason: When you’re under physical or emotional stress, your body’s fight-or-flight response kicks in, which triggers the release of stress hormones. Chronic stress in particular is bad news for your skin because it can increase sensitivity and eventually weaken the skin’s barrier—the outermost layer that keeps water in and irritants out. Result: Your skin has a harder time staying hydrated and healing itself. The deluge of the stress hormone cortisol can also rev up activity in your oil glands, leading to blockages within the hair follicles and creating a friendly environment for acne-causing bacteria. The relationship can go the other way, too: Skin rebellions can tank your mood and selfesteem and make you less likely to participate in fun activities. What proof? A 2014 study from Australia found that people with atopic disorders, such as eczema, have a 59 percent greater likelihood of developing depression, and a 2015 study in British Journal of Dermatology found that psoriasis increases depression risk in women. Still, your skin doesn’t have to be at the mercy of your day (and vice versa). Heed these experts’ advice to help safeguard your skin—and maybe feel a bit less stressed-out in the ﬁrst place.

St re ss c a n c a u s e b re a ko u t s a n d other skin flare-ups, which only cause m o re st re ss . We a s ke d a d e r m , a nutritionist, a psychologist, and a smar t p a t i e nt h ow to sto p th e c yc l e . By Stacey Colino

54 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

THE DERMATOLOGIST Ellen Marmur, MD, associate professor of dermatology at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai in New York City and author of Simple Skin Beauty

“September is a killer time for skin—you’re going from a vacation mind-set back to a work mindset; kids are going back to school; the weather is changing. If you have a skin ﬂare-up, try a 40-day detox. Skin renewal can take about 40 days for people in their 40s, for example. Stop all scrubs, toners, and masks. Use warm water and a clean washcloth to cleanse your face; if you want to use a cleanser, stick with a creamy, soap-free one. Follow with a gentle eye cream and moisturizer, and use sun protection generously. When stressed, people often pick at their bumps—don’t! That will lead to more

GET T Y IMAGES

YO UR SU RVIVAL GU ID E FO R STR E S S E D SKIN

Your eczema may be hiding something. You may think you know eczema, but what you might not know is that it’s a term used to describe a variety of skin conditions. The most common form of eczema is actually a chronic disease called atopic dermatitis. You can see the signs of atopic dermatitis on the surface, but a key underlying cause remains hidden. Inflammation beneath the skin can lead to the red, itchy rashes that you try to manage, but just keep coming back. This underlying inflammation is always active, meaning your next flare-up is just waiting to return.

Learn more about what’s happening at EczemaExposed.com

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THE REALIST

irritation. After your detox, you can begin the reentry of ‘extras.’ Add an antioxidant serum daily for two weeks, then a growth factor serum at night. When your skin is in a good place, reintroduce exfoliants, one at a time. Most important, talk with your dermatologist about treatments that would help.”

THE NUTRITIONIST Molly Kimball, RD, nutrition manager of the Ochsner Fitness Center in New Orleans

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“When you’re under stress, it’s important to limit added sugars, white carbs, fried foods, and alcohol. These foods can be incredibly inflammatory, which is a problem because eczema, acne, and rosacea are all exacerbated by inflammation. Plus, many of these foods can cause blood sugar highs and lows, which interfere with your body’s ability to deal with stress and make it harder to repair skin flare-ups. Instead, drink a lot of water and eat fruits, vegetables, and fish that are high in omega-3 fatty acids, which fight inflammation and hydrate the skin from within. Also, add probiotics—found in foods like Greek yogurt, kombucha, and cultured cottage cheese—because stress can lead to imbalances in gut bacteria, which can cause inflammation that can take a toll on your skin. And exercise daily: Besides boosting circulation, which helps shuttle more nutrients and oxygen to the skin cells, regular, low-intensity exercise helps you decrease cortisol levels.”

Angled pen for easy reach. THE PSYCHOLOGIST Rick Fried, MD, PhD, clinical psychologist, dermatologist, and clinical director of Yardley Dermatology Associates in Yardley, Pennsylvania

0.2 mm flex tip draws between lashes.

“These skin conditions are capricious, and that unpredictability can lead to more emotional and physiological reactivity. It becomes a reciprocal vicious cycle: If your skin gets redder and more sensitive, you can get stressed about what other people think, and the body’s adrenaline

response makes it self-perpetuating. What you want to do is lower your level of stress below the threshold that causes ﬂare-ups of these skin conditions. You can do this with behavioral strategies, such as exercise, yoga, tai chi, progressive muscle relaxation, deep breathing, or mindfulness meditation—all these roads lead to decreased reactivity of your stress response and immune system. Stress management is very much like dating: It’s a matter of individual taste. You don’t have to be forced into something that doesn’t click with you physiologically and mentally. It also helps to do self-talk. Put ﬂare-ups in perspective by comparing them with the worst thing that could happen.”

THE PATIENT Mary Catherine Hessel, 42, New York City

“I’ve suffered from eczema all my life. My mom called it ‘raw hamburger.’ I saw a dermatologist, who determined that the rash on my arms and legs and around my mouth was eczema, so I switched to Cetaphil face wash, Dove soap, and Vaseline. Then, miraculously, it cleared up— until my late 30s, when I was dealing with ridiculous stress at work. It reared its ugly head all over my back, scalp, and torso. As a technology sales rep, I was so self-conscious meeting customers: What if I have to scratch my scalp? What if they see my raw back? It was embarrassing. Forget dating; I never wanted anyone to see my body. I was a hot mess. My dermatologist and I experimented with a number of different medical treatments until we found a regimen that worked. And I made some lifestyle changes that have helped. I switched to ﬂannel sheets. I wash my loofah in the machine with my clothes after every use, using hypoallergenic shampoo. I soak in Aveeno bath treatments, and I run eight miles daily to de-stress. It all sounds kind of crazy, but if you’re vigilant and open to making changes, you can keep it under control and feel conﬁdent again.”

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THE REALIST

Now What?!? S M A RT F I X E S F O R L I F E ’ S L I T T L E D I S A ST E R S By Blake B akkila

There’s a tick on my child.

I can’t get the body odor out of the armpits of my gym clothes.

K .D., VIA EMAIL

58 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

F.G., VIA EMAIL

My heels squeak! B.G., VIA EMAIL

Often the squeak is coming from the shoe rubbing against the foot, says Meghan Cleary, a footwear expert and the author of Shoe Are You? Are the shoes leather? Break them in by spritzing with room-temperature water inside and out until damp, then wear them around the house until they’ve dried. If the shoes are synthetic, try wearing socks to stretch them out. Or if you know exactly where the squeak is coming from, apply a spot pad to the inside of the shoe (try Foot Petals Strappy Strips, $8; amazon.com). If the squeaking doesn’t cease, take the heels to a pro.

THE FIX:

THE FIX: Soak the clothes in a mix of one part distilled white vinegar to four parts cold water, says Mary Marlowe Leverette, a laundry expert at The Spruce. Then launder as usual using a heavy-duty detergent, like Tide or Persil. A “sanitary” (hot water) setting can kill odor-causing bacteria but may also damage synthetic fabrics such as spandex, so check the care label before washing. Air-dry garments to avoid shrinkage or damage. Next time, help prevent odors from locking into your active gear between washes: Immediately after wearing it, soak it in a solution of cool water and a half cup of baking soda for an hour.

Have a crisis that needs solving? Email your problem to askrealsimple@ realsimple.com.

T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T / O F F S E T. S P E C I A L T H A N K S T O W I L L I A M S C H A F F N E R , M D , P R O F E S S O R O F P R E V E N T I V E M E D I C I N E A N D I N F E C T I O U S D I S E A S E S AT VA N D E R B I LT U N I V E R S I T Y S C H O O L O F M E D I C I N E

THE FIX: Using tweezers, grasp the tick by the head, as close to the skin as possible, and pull straight up and out. Don’t twist and never grab a tick by the abdomen, which could squeeze pathogens into the bite site, says entomologist Nancy Troyano, PhD, director of technical education and training at Rentokil Steritech. If part of the tick stays in the skin, it will eventually work its way out. After removal, wash the area and your hands with soap and warm water. There’s no need to apply an ointment, but keep an eye on the bite site for any sign of a rash or an infection. Save the tick—it may still be alive—in a jar and take it to your doctor if your child shows any symptoms of a tickborne illness, like rash, fever, or joint pain.

THE REALIST

FALL MVPs A NEW SEASON DOESN’T H AV E T O M E A N A W H O L E N E W WA R D RO B E — JUST FO CUS ON THESE

PLE ATE D S K I RT S I n s p i re d by b a l l et s k i r t s , th e s e u n i ve rs a l l y f l a t te r i n g m i d i - l e n g th st y l e s m a ke a ny e n s e m b l e m o re g ra c efu l .

F I V E S M A RT E ST T R E N D S. By Rebecca D aly

(From left)

A L L E N S C H WA RT Z Dress this versatile skirt up with heels or down with white sneakers. TO BUY: Pleated tea-length skirt, $440; allen schwartz.com.

C LU B M O N A C O Pale pink pairs with nearly everything— it works just like a neutral. TO BUY: Annina skirt, $180; clubmonaco.com.

60 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

K AT E S PA D E N E W YO R K Demure enough for the office, this shimmering gold option also feels fancy enough for a fete. TO BUY: Rose pleated skirt, $348; katespade.com.

P R O P S T Y L I N G B Y J I L L E D WA R D S F O R H A L L E Y R E S O U R C E S

Photographs by Jonathon Kambouris

NOW OFFERING PETITES AT SELECT BOUTIQUES AND ONLINE. EXTENDED SIZES AND ADDITIONAL LENGTHS ALSO AVAILABLE AT CHICOS.COM.

(Clockwise from top left)

JENNIFER FISHER This sophisticated bracelet was inspired by the soft loops of calligraphy. TO BUY: Script cuff, $975; jenniferfisher jewelry.com. A .V. M A X Clean, minimalist lines add interest without going overboard. TO BUY: Wave cuff, $60; avmaxnyc.com. V I N C E C A M U TO Dress up your little black dress with this dazzling starburst design. TO BUY: Star T cuff, $58; vince camuto.com. SAR AH MAGID Simple and sculptural, this one puts the finishing touch on a crisp white shirt. TO BUY: Ingot cuff, $248; sarahmagid.com.

STATE M E NT CU FF S B o l d , eye - c a tc h i n g b ra c e l et s m a ke fo r o n e - ste p a c c e ss o r i z i n g — n o oth e r j ewe l r y n e c e ss a r y.

V I A S AV I E N E Master the mixedmetals look with one piece that does all the work. TO BUY: Colette Open Hinge cuff, $275; viasaviene.com.

(Clockwise from top left)

DAY CLUTCH E S T h e s e h a n d h e l d b a g s f i t yo u r e ss e nt i a l s b u t wo n’t we i g h yo u d ow n . A n d th ey m a ke eve n d e n i m fe e l d re ss y.

D O ONEY & BOURKE Three interior pockets keep everything organized. TO BUY: Alto Large Cecilia clutch, $525; dooney.com. V I N C E C A M U TO Grommeted suede is a little bit edgy, a little bit refined. TO BUY: Areli clutch, $178; vince camuto.com. C L A R E V. Forest-green faux croc feels unassumingly chic. TO BUY: Foldover clutch, $235; clarev.com.

S R S Q UA R E D BY S O N D R A RO B E RT S The best of both worlds, this converts to a shoulder bag with a detachable chain strap. TO BUY: Envelope clutch, $65; zokydoky.com. WELDEN Sleek black leather transitions seamlessly from work to date night. TO BUY: Mingle clutch, $250; weldenbags .com.

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

WA LK A B LE H E E L S D re ss y e n o u g h fo r wo r k , c o mfo r ta b l e e n o u g h fo r r u n n i n g e r ra n d s , a n d st y l i s h e n o u g h to b e yo u r n ew fa vo r i te s h o e .

(From top)

Z AR A Swap out your basic ballet flats for this higher-impact style. TO BUY: Floral Block heel, $30; zara.com. COLE HAAN Wear this metallic pair with cropped black trousers. TO BUY: Collection loafer, $420; colehaan.com. NINA ORIGINAL S Glints of gold give this neutral pair an extra kick. TO BUY: Bonnie heel, $128; ninashoes.com. JIMMY CHO O Burnished leather makes these an evening-appropriate pick. TO BUY: Shiny Spazzalatto, $895; jimmychoo.com.

64 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

See even more of our favorite fall styles at realsimple.com/fallfinds.

(From left)

BANANA REPUBLIC A menswear-like cut meets soft, feminine vermilion satin. TO BUY: Rust Shiny Boyfriend blazer, $168; bananarepublic.com. LOF T Jeans? Trousers? A pencil skirt? This cropped silhouette looks good with all of them. TO BUY: $128; loft.com. JUICY COUTURE Embroidery adds some welcome whimsy. TO BUY: Floral Embroidered blazer, $228; juicycouture.com.

U PDATE D B L A Z E R S Un ex p e c te d fa b r i c s a n d d e s i g n d eta i l s l et yo u h a ve a l i t t l e fu n w i th a sta l wa r t wardrob e sta p l e .

CURATE YOUR WARDROBE

THE FRENCH WAY

Embrace the French fashion sensibility that “less is more” with these tips. They’ll make getting dressed an enjoyable experience.

HANDBAGS A well-made, versatile bag like a leather tote is practical and timeless.

CLOTHING Invest in quality pieces that bri you joy so that every ensemble is one you love.

SHOES Comfortable, s ylish ballets go h everything— a d welcome an mpromptu stroll.

ENJOY AN EVERYDAY SIMPLE PLEASURE WITH NEW OUI™ BY YOPLAIT®—FRENCH STYLE YOGURT.

THE REALIST

Tre n d t o Tr y

Crimson THE COLOR OF THE SEASON IS RED HOT (AND S U R P R I S I N G L Y W E A R A B L E ).

4 C U T E C A R RYA L L

Red lace may sound a little racy, but a midi length keeps this frock just modest enough. TO BUY: Saylor dress, $319; shopbop.com.

It’s roomy enough for everyday essentials but not big enough to weigh you down. The bag also has a shoulder strap for an easy, hands-free commute. TO BUY: $525; elleme.com.

2 E Y E - C ATC H I N G EARRINGS Perk up a white tee or a little black dress with these paintedbrass and Swarovskicrystal earrings. TO BUY: $198; jenniferbehr.com.

5 JA Z Z E D - U P J E A N S Swap in this coated red pair for your usual skinny jeans to take your look up a notch (or 10). TO BUY: $198; joesjeans.com.

3 S TAT E M E N T S L E E V E S

6 S PA N G L E D S L I D E S

Details like ties and bell cuffs make a simple, solid-colored top feel fashion-forward. TO BUY: $49; marledby reunitedclothing.com.

Flat, sparkly sandals will put a little pep in your step, even if you’re just running errands. TO BUY: Kensie sandal, $69; macys.com.

68 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

See more crimson-colored styles at realsimple.com/redpicks.

Photographs by Philip Friedman

S O F T S T Y L I N G B Y M A I T R A N ; B R I C K WA L L , R U D Y S U L G A N / G E T T Y I M A G E S

1 DAT E - N I G H T D R E S S

Nothing says “welcome to the neighborhood” like fresh-from-the-oven cookies.

Homemade taste baked into every bite.

Uncommonly Good®

MEANINGFUL CONNECTIONS IN A MODERN WORLD

5 E XCE LLE NT H A B IT S TO STA RT W H E N S CH O O L D O E S T h i n k of th e s e a s fa m i l y - w i d e , ex t ra - e a r l y N ew Ye a r ’s re s o l u t i o n s . W i th n o C ro ss F i t c o m m i t m e nt . B y S a r a h J. R o b b i n s

G U I L L E FA I N G O L D / STO C K SY

ADOPT A “READ AND DISCUSS” POLICY

At university, I got into the habit of starting assignments right away, even if they weren’t due for two weeks. That way, I could actually ﬁnish the task with the right amount of preparation and work. Now my partner and I have four kids, and the nonprocrastination idea looks more like this: Our oldest child, who is 7, has weekly homework. When she gets an assignment, we spend a few moments the ﬁrst evening reading and discussing

it. It doesn’t feel like work; we’re not “doing” homework, but really, we are. Understanding the task and its purpose is an important part. I’d be more impressed if a child could describe the task she needs to do and why than if she simply completed it. So read and discuss and then let it sit for a night. The next day, the kid will be raring to go. CHRIS FERRIE, A PHYSICIST AND MATHEMATICIAN, IS THE AUTHOR OF RO CKE T SCIENCE FOR BABIES AND OTHER CHILDREN’S B O OKS. HE LIVES IN SYDNE Y, AUSTRALIA .

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

R E LAT I N G

STRUCTURE THE SNACKING

A few weeks before school starts, our family begins to cut back on frequent, idle snacking. We try to prevent little hands from grabbing whatever they want in the pantry, whenever they want it, out of boredom. We certainly don’t restrict, but just like in school, we establish some ground rules: We set a snack time, and the kids have to ask before taking a snack. That way, when the fall semester begins, they’re used to the structure. JAMES KICINSKI-McCOY IS A WRITER, PHOTOGRAPHER, AND COFOUNDER AND EDITOR OF MOTHER MAGA ZINE. SHE LIVES IN NASHVILLE.

“O n l y a ve r y s m a l l nu m b e r Use that back-to-school feeling to your advantage, even if you aren’t in school anymore. Pursue a new opportunity: If you work in a scientific or technical field, consider working on your communication skills with a writing class or project. Or maybe it’s time to acquire some tech skills. Find an online certificate program in coding or digital graphic design offered by accredited universities. You could also submit your writing or art to an anthology, journal, or juried show. Some professional development programs even include free travel! Remember, only a very small number of people apply for a whole lot of things. They’re the ones who get them. MICHAEL WING IS A HIGH SCHO OL SCIENCE TE ACHER IN SAN ANSELMO, CALIFORNIA , AND THE AUTHOR OF PAS SION PROJECTS FOR SMART PEOPLE.

Get back-to-school kitchen-organizing tips at realsimple.com/b2skitchen.

72 RE AL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

of p e ople apply for a w h o l e l ot of th i n g s . T h ey ’re th e o n e s w h o g et th e m .”

TELL KIDS TO “FIGURE IT OUT”

It’s one of my catchphrases. I teach middle school, where parents can’t be as involved as they were when the kids were in elementary school, and it’s hard. Parents worry, “Will my kid get into college?” Kids worry, “Will I do well in my classes?” Many of my students calculate their GPAs every day! We are all so focused on following a straight line. But we need to be focused on how to struggle. Because everyone does, whether you’re a straight-A or straight-C student. It’s not always about coming out on top; it’s about valuing efforts and mistakes and learning to respond to them. When your kid is stuck, what does he do? We need to teach our kids that we’re all still learning. Life is hard, but you regroup and ﬁgure it out. JENNIFER WOLFE IS A JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL TE ACHER IN DAVIS, CALIFORNIA . SHE WRITES AT JENNIFERWOLFE.NET.

BE FLEXIBLE WITH READING

You’ve heard it over and over: Kids need to read every day. But they need to read what they love. As adults, if we don’t like a book, we can put it down and choose something else. We need to give that option to kids, too. In my classroom, I try to have different genres and series available. The goal is to get students to have a positive experience, which builds their conﬁdence and helps them understand that if they’re frustrated, it’s not that they don’t like reading; it’s that they haven’t found the right book. Lately my students have been ﬁred up about any book that has been made into a movie or a television show. Graphic novels, too: Monster, by Walter Dean Myers, is a perennial favorite. And like many other graphic novels, it is based on a traditional one. Often kids will wind up reading that, too. SYDNEY CHAFFEE IS A NINTH-GRADE HUMANITIES TE ACHER IN D ORCHESTER , MA S SACHUSE T TS. SHE WA S NAMED THE 2017 NATIONAL TE ACHER OF THE YE AR BY THE COUNCIL OF CHIEF STATE SCHO OL OFFICERS.

J E S S L E W I S / STO C K SY

START ONE NEW THING

LIVE UNPROCESSED

R E L AT I N G

KNICKKNACK

Ng found this vintage tin windup toy cat behind a radiator. Today it lives on a bookshelf.

Good Read

The Secret History of a House F O R CELE STE NG , A G U T R E N OVAT I O N R E V E A L E D A S U R P R I S I N G W I N D O W I N T O T H E PA S T.

I T WA S C H A R M I N G : That’s what we thought at first. We were recently married, childless, and moving to Cambridge, Massachusetts, where we hoped to settle and start a family. The real estate agent, a George Lucas look-alike who smelled of cigars, walked us through. “It’s the top two floors,” he said. “The owner used to live here, but he’s moved to Gloucester. A young couple is renting the first floor.” He opened the door. “It has everything,” he said. “You’ll love it.”

Photographs by Christopher Churchill

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

R E L AT I N G

S AV E T H E DAT E

In the back of the attic, workers found a large wedding invitation from 1978. Now it’s a conversation piece in the guest room.

use had worn a dip in the floor of the claw-foot tub, so it never drained properly. My office had been carved out of a larger room and had no heat. And that shower— though our friends found it memorable—was dark and cave-like, and I could never scrub the mildew stains out of the wood. Plus, as we were now learning, the house had not been built for children. It was full of open shelving, which our toddler gleefully stripped bare. The stairways were open, steep, and impossible to add safety gates to. And the cast-iron radiators were scalding to touch yet still left the rooms chilly. It was time for a change, and as soon as our downstairs neighbors had moved out and we’d saved up some money, we decided to renovate the house and convert it into a single family. We would tear it down to the studs and start afresh, we agreed. We’d clear out all the old, leftover stuff and make it exactly what we wanted: a perfect clean slate for our family. T H E F I R S T T H I N G T H E workers found was the typewriter. “It was hidden way back in the attic,” they told me. “Do you want to keep it?” It was an old Sears plug-in from the ’70s, beige. THE COMMUNICATOR, read the label on the front. A thick layer of dust coated the case. It must have been up there for ages, I thought, peeking into its heart. Decades’ worth of letters overlapped on the ribbon inside, gray against the black, so many that I couldn’t make out a single word. What had this machine typed, I wondered: business agreements, love notes, a will? Who had used it, and who had left it in the attic for us to find? Next, wedged behind the radiator in the upstairs guest room, was an antique tin windup toy—a cat that would nose a ball across the floor. On closer inspection, we found holes in the window frames, for window guards. This must have been a child’s room, I realized, and I wondered what it had looked like then and whether the child who’d lived here was still alive. Whether she had ever missed that toy or never even ABOUT T H E AU T H O R knew where she’d lost it. Celeste Ng is the Every week, it seemed, the workers disbest-selling author covered another relic of the many people of Everything I who’d once called our house their own. Never Told You. Her next novel, Little Behind the phone nook in the kitchen, an Fires Everywhere, old chimney, the stovepipe holes in its sides will be published September 12. covered with tin lids, each carefully painted

C E L E S T E N G , K E V I N D AY P H O T O G R A P H Y

He was right, on both counts. The house was old (built more than 100 years ago, we’d learn later), but it did have everything: a claw-foot tub, a kitchen with dark wood cabinets and an island, a tiny office—hemmed in by French doors—where I could write. The owner turned landlord had been a photographer and amateur woodworker, and he’d added plenty of quirks: built-in cubbies and bookshelves, a pair of closets with carved elephant-head door handles, even a spa-like shower made of ipe wood. And my husband and I did love it. We signed the lease on the spot. The day after we moved in, we went for a walk through our new neighborhood. I was already besotted. “If Steve decides to sell,” I said, referring to our landlord, “you know what we should do? We should buy it from him.” Four years later, that’s exactly what we did. We were good tenants, and I was handy, which endeared us to our landlord. He had lived most of his adult life in the house and was touched to see someone taking care of it. He sold it to us at a discount, and we were thrilled. By that time we had a young son, and we were relieved that we wouldn’t have to move. The neighborhood was family friendly and safe. My husband could walk to work. It was the perfect spot for us. But by then it was clear that the house was not quite perfect for us. Many of those quirks that we’d once adored had gradually turned into annoyances. The kitchen by this time was 25 years old, and the grout in the tiled counter left sand when I wiped it. Decades of

R E L AT I N G

PA P E R T I M E C A P S U L E

This water-stained envelope held two photos from Cape Cod, now framed and displayed in Ng’s dining room.

with a farm scene. According to the Internet, they dated from the 1930s. I thought about someone in the heart of the Depression, carefully selecting the exact pictures they wanted, then sealing them in the walls, not to be seen again until now. Some of the finds were mysterious. In one crawl space we found a musket ball, but we’d never know how, or when, it got there. Other items were startlingly specific. In another back corner of the attic, we found a wedding invitation: “Mary M. Owen and Louis A. Palena invite you to join us celebrating our willingness to love, share, cherish, pleasure and support one another. We will be married. SunDay, May 28, 1978.” I Googled, trying to find out more about them, but to no avail. Whoever Mary and Louis were, they’d left no record—except this one oddly capitalized, oddly worded artifact of their lives, tucked away in the house that they’d once shared and that we now shared with their memories. The last items we found had been left quite deliberately: a certificate from the Nikon Advanced Systems program, stapled inside the wall of our kitchen, dated 1990 and bearing the name of our former landlord. Pinned to it was a small medal, but when I reached to remove it, it fell between the cracks of the floorboards, where it remains to this day. Then, wedged behind one of the studs in that same wall, we found an envelope, with a water-stained note: “These photos were enclosed in this wall during the 1989–1990 renovation of our house.” Two black-and-white photographs of Cape Cod, undated. W I T H E A C H D I S C O V E RY, I asked myself the same questions: Who had left this? Why had they chosen this to save for later? What did it say about them, and what had they intended it to say? By gutting the house, we thought we’d be starting over, building a home that was ours alone. But even the space, we soon realized, would always be shaped by everything that had come before. Why did the wall stop right there? Because behind it was a chimney, from the days of coal heat stoves. Why had they put a soffit there? Because long ago, someone had run a pipe to make the upstairs bathroom. The lives of all the former residents overlaid the house in just the same way. They would always be there, and they gave the house its character. They made it not just a house but this house, our house. A house that had held many lives, that bore in its bones many memories. We’d never know all the answers about those previous

78 RE AL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

lives, but the more we found, the more we discovered we didn’t want to strip all that history away. We wanted instead to add to it, to find a way for our lives and those other lives to overlap. Before the workmen closed up the wall of the hall closet, we made a time capsule of our own. It’s not the whole story of us, of course, but it’s the way we’d like to be remembered, the memories we’d like to leave behind for whoever rebuilds our house 20, 50, 100 years from now. Two family portraits: one a photograph, one crayoned by our then 5-year-old. A business card with the cover of my novel and my email address, in case we’re still around for them to contact. And plans of the house as it was built and as we’d changed it. There’s no such thing as a clean slate, I reflected as we tucked the envelope into the closet wall. Now that we’ve moved back into the “new” house, it looks quite different. We’d moved doors here, created rooms there. Our furniture fills up the rooms; our pictures hang on the walls. But I’ve framed the Cape Cod photos that had been sealed up in the kitchen and hung them in the dining room; I’ve mounted the elephant-head door handles in my office. I posted the wedding invitation in our guest bedroom, and every time guests visit, they ask about it, and I tell them the story again.

GOOD R E A D ES SAY C O N T E ST

What was the happiest moment of your life? Enter Real Simple’s 10th annual Good Read Essay Contest and you could have your essay published in Real Simple and receive a prize of $3,000. S U B M I T YO U R T Y P E D , D O U B L E - S PAC E D S U B M I S S I O N ( 1 , 5 0 0 WO R D S M AX I M U M I N A M I C R O S O F T WO R D D O C U M E N T ) AT R E A L S I M P L E . C O M / G O O D R E A D C O N T E ST. THIS CONTEST BEGINS AT 12:01 A .M. EASTERN TIME (ET) O N M AY 2 2 , 2 017 , A N D E N D S AT 1 1 : 59 P. M . E T O N S E PT E M B E R 1 8 , 2 017 . A L L S U B M I T T E D E S SAYS M U ST B E NONFICTION. OPEN TO LEGAL RESIDENTS OF THE UNITED STAT E S AG E 19 O R O L D E R AT T I M E O F E N T RY. VO I D W H E R E PROHIBITED BY LAW. (ENTRIES WILL NOT BE RETURNED.)

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B E D B AT H A N D B E YO N D . CO M / S H O P F O RCO L L E G E

R E L AT I N G

Modern Manners R E A L S I M P L E ’ S E T I Q U E T T E E X P E RT, C AT H E R I N E N E W M A N, O F F E R S

HER BEST ADVICE ON YOUR SO CIAL QUANDARIES.

C . P. A S KS . . .

I L L U S T R AT I O N B Y U L I K N Ö R Z E R ; C A K E , B E T S I E VA N D E R M E E R / G E T T Y I M A G E S

A friend’s 2-year-old knocked over my coffee table at a party. The mom said she was sorry, since it dented my floor. I said, “No worries,” because my floor already had a few nicks. The next morning, I noticed that the edge of the table was cracked. I hesitated to tell her but decided to mention it in a text. Her answer was, “Oh no.” No apologies, no offer to pay for it. Should I have not mentioned it? Should she have offered to replace it? This situation falls under my general “People trump things” rule, and “No worries” was the right thing to say. Because guests are, well, human. They swing a hockey stick that breaks your light ﬁxture, shatter wineglasses, bleed on the bed, and barf on the rug. (This is an actual tally from my hosting life.) You’re more likely to enjoy the rewards of your own “I’ve always hated that rug!” loveliness than whatever money you might extract from a friend. So, no, I wouldn’t have mentioned the damage if I were you, and, yes, I would have offered to pay for it if I were she. But I would leave it alone at this point and let your resentment evaporate. Your friend probably took your reassurance as an umbrella sentiment sheltering the entire episode. Luckily, it sounds like the table is functional and the friendship is intact, so you get to continue to enjoy both.

P. G . A S K S . . .

Is it right to invite someone to your birthday party at a restaurant and ask them to pay?

ABOUT C AT H E R I N E The author of One Mixed-Up Night, Catastrophic Happiness, and Waiting for Birdy, Catherine Newman has shared her wisdom on matters ranging from family and friends to happiness and pickling in numerous publications. She gets advice from her husband and two opinionated children in Amherst, Massachusetts.

As long as your guests know what to expect (and you’re not, like, Bill Gates), you can do whatever you wish. If everyone is going to split the bill, then frame the event as a get-together: “I was hoping a bunch of us might go out to celebrate my birthday!” Save a formal invitation, or the word “hosting,” for a party where you’re paying. Or go halfway: “We’re thrilled to pick up the bar tab, but we can’t swing the whole dinner. Please join us in lieu of bringing a gift.” Whatever you decide, keep your eyes on the prize, which is having a good time and enjoying your friends.

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

R E LAT I N G

M . R . A S KS . . .

My husband and I just bought a new house. My in-laws are downsizing, and my mother-in-law keeps giving us their stuff. I don’t mind the items that have sentimental value to my husband, but old towels and cookbooks are a little much. What’s the best way to handle this? If you’re actually just venting (“My mother-in-law is so annoying!”) under cover of asking a question, please know you’re not the ﬁrst. But if the issue is simply that you’re getting stuff you don’t want, can you muster all your compassion and imagine this transition, in which these older people must part with cherished belongings en route to a smaller life? Can you try to just take whatever she wants to give you (and maybe get rid of it after it’s had a brief stay in the basement)? Not because you want the towels but because it’s a generous act to accept them. If not— look, sometimes we just can’t—or if your in-laws are emotionally resilient, consider gently qualifying the arrangement. “We are happy to receive all these things, especially the sentimental ones, as long as it’s OK with you if we pass along anything we can’t ﬁnd a home for here.” All of which prompts the question, Why isn’t your husband managing these interactions with his parents?

84 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

Parenting can make for strange bedfellows. I ran into similar trouble when my kids were little: I started up a desperate friendship, only to discover that I had nothing in common with the other mom, and then backed out a little clumsily. It’s OK, but keep your reasons to yourself. Given that you have no history together and you don’t want to pursue a friendship, your neighbor should not have to suffer a critique of her values. Simply turn down every playdate kindly but ﬁrmly—without the false suggestion that you’ll reschedule: “I’m sorry, but our days have gotten busy. It’s not going to work.” Start now so you can extricate yourself before all the kids get friendly and it becomes a big, awkward mess, and assume she’ll get the hint eventually. In the long run, she’ll probably be happier to spend time with more like-minded people, too.

H AV E A N E T I Q U E T T E Q U E ST I O N ? Submit your social conundrums to Catherine at realsimple.com/ modernmanners. Selected letters will be featured on these pages every month.

ANDRE AS VON E INSIEDEL/GET T Y IMAGES

N . P. A S KS . . .

I am a stay-at-home mom of two young children. My husband works long hours, and I can get lonely. I recently met a neighbor in my building who is also a stayat-home parent, and I was hopeful we would become good friends. However, I was disappointed to learn that this neighbor holds values, parenting and personal, that are 100 percent opposite to mine. She has invited me to playdates, but I just cannot get past these differences. How do I relay this message without coming across as rude or hurtful?

R E L AT I N G

The Vets Will See You Now ANSWER S TO YO UR HAIRIE ST PET QUESTIONS

W H AT A F L A K E

F O OT I N M O U T H

YO U AT E W H AT ?

Why does my cat have such bad dandruff? Is there anything I can do to get rid of it?

I have a Doberman with brittle nails that constantly crack and break. We’ve had to make multiple trips to the vet to treat infection resulting from excessive licking. Is there a way to cure the cracks myself or prevent the brittle nails?

When my pet eats something he shouldn’t (like certain plants), what’s the first thing I should do? Are there at-home remedies I can try before rushing to the vet?

The dandruff is a sign that your feline’s skin is either too dry or too flaky. Consider adding fish oil to your cat’s food once a day; veterinarian Jen Lavallee likes Nutramax Welactin Feline Omega-3 softgel capsules ($17 for 60; amazon .com). But if your cat is overweight or older and prone to arthritis, the problem may stem from an inability to groom itself. Veterinarian Gayle O’Konski suggests spot-treating the affected areas, which generally include the lower back. Since many cats hate running water, add an antiseborrheic shampoo (O’Konski’s go-to: Virbac Keratolux, $20; chewy .com) to a bowl of warm water, apply the mixture with a washcloth, rub it in, and rinse with a separate bowl of water. Do this twice a week for two weeks, then monthly, to help ensure your cat’s coat stays pristine. If your cat won’t tolerate this method, consider disposable pet wipes instead.

Brittle nails might be a sign your pup has a dermatologic disorder that can be addressed with vitamin E and omega-6, says O’Konski. Give your dog a boost with a vet-prescribed supplement. The breaks could also be caused by nails that are too long, so trim them when they start to curve over (roughly every two to four weeks). It’s also possible the infection itself is causing the weak nails. Excessive licking, which creates an ideal environment for such infection, often indicates allergies, says veterinarian Mary Gardner. A veterinary dermatologist can test for irritants and create medication to help the problem. Or an endocrine disorder, like hypothyroidism, may be to blame. Your vet can run blood tests and prescribe treatments if necessary.

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Step one: Call for backup. That’s your veterinarian or the ASPCA Animal Poison Control hotline. The latter will charge you $65, but, notes veterinarian Andy Roark, the experts have access to an extensive database “with the most up-to-date information, and a doctor will walk you through everything.” The pros will either tell you there’s nothing to worry about or talk to you about inducing vomiting by giving your pet a hydrogen peroxide solution. Another possibility: They’ll let you know that the item consumed (bleach, for instance) will cause more damage to the esophagus if regurgitated and instruct you to head to the vet so your animal can be treated with a dose of activated charcoal that will bind up the toxins.

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What Child Is This? WHEN YOUR KID’S PERSONALITY IS THE OPP OSITE OF YOUR S, PA R E N T I N G M AY TA K E SOME EXTR A LOVE AND U N D E R STA N D I N G. By Erin Zammett Ruddy R A I S I NG A N Y H U M A N B E I NG is hard, but when that human is nothing like you, the degree of difficulty goes way up. “You’re going to spend a lot of time outside your comfort zone,” says Laura Markham, PhD, a clinical psychologist and the author of Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids. “It’s harder to relate to them, to connect with them, and to value what they value.” You may also have to work through some disappointment if you envisioned a speciﬁc type of child and got another. “But when I point out to parents that the child is merely different than they are, a lightbulb goes off, and a breakthrough can happen,” says Markham. Ready for yours?

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R E L AT I N G

You’re outgoing and will happily talk to every cashier. Your little guy struggles with saying hello to his own grandparents. And forget about looking a waiter in the eye. WHY IT’S S O FRUSTR ATING: Having a shy child can make the most benign social encounters awkward and exhausting. You stress over the possibility of people thinking your child is rude and worryyou’re being judged. “It can be frustrating for an extroverted mom to have to remind her child to say something as seemingly simple as please and hello,” says Susan Cain, cofounder of Quiet Revolution and author of Quiet Power: The Secret Strengths of Introverted Kids.

Know this: “When children don’t want to say thank you or make small talk, they’re not doing it out of rudeness— they’re truly struggling with shyness,” says Cain. It’s a different motive and should be approached as such. “The key is that the parent needs to be in the right heart place,” she says. “I know that sounds hokey, but you don’t want your child to feel that you’re impatient or ashamed.” You can’t let kids opt out either, so get down on their level and encourage them. “Say, ‘This is an important thing to do, and you’re going to get there,’ ” says Cain. “Tell them you’ll work on it together and take each encounter as it comes. If they don’t say hello this time, you’ll try again next time.” It’s ﬁne to sweeten the deal with an incentive. But don’t push for perfection. “Once you feel your child has stepped outside his comfort zone and achieved something that was previously difficult, declare victory and move on,” says H O W T O M E E T H A L F WAY:

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Cain. Maybe that means he said hello but didn’t make eye contact—OK! Praise the hello and work on the eye contact later. “There’s so much pressure for little kids to behave in extroverted ways,” says Cain. “But there’s a lot of time to learn this stuff.” DE ALING WITH THE REVER SE: What if you’re shy and your child won’t stop chatting up the store clerks? Outsource! “I can sit in silence for hours, but my oldest will talk to anyone,” says Sarah G., a mother of three. “When I need a break, I trade kids with my extroverted neighbor. She’ll take my daughter over to play with her daughter, and I’ll take her son, who’s happy to quietly build Lego creations with my more introverted son.” No lifeline in sight? Give your child boundaries. “Tell him that it’s wonderful he’s so friendly and curious and that sometimes, even though people might like you a lot, they still want to be quiet,” suggests Cain. “Teach him how to occupy himself with a book or coloring.”

You played every sport. Your daughter has no interest. What’s childhood without weekends spent on a grassy field? W H Y I T ’ S S O F RU S T R AT I N G : You worry she’ll miss out on friendships and exercise. But really, your ego is in play. “Any parent who had a sport they identiﬁed with will get their yearnings and projections triggered when a child gets to the age to begin playing,” says Markham. “If it turns out the child has no interest or ability, the parent may very well feel let down.” H O W T O M E E T H A L F WAY : First, you’ve got to grieve. “The faster parents can mourn the fact that they’re not going to have a superstar on the ﬁeld, the faster they’ll realize how much more free time they’ll have on the weekends,” says Whitney L., a former college athlete and a mother

R E L AT I N G

When we accept sensitivity instead of shushing it, kids don’t have to act it out as much. As you empathize, you’ll see her whole body relax. of three. And the faster you can help your child ﬁnd a passion of her own. Let her try yoga, rock climbing, or karate. “Ask lots of questions to help your child make a good choice, like what she thinks the activity will be like, why she wants to try it, and what she thinks might be hard about it,” says Markham. Look for a trial ballet class, or attend a practice or clinic before you commit. “There is no reason to make a young child stick with something she knows right away that she hates,” says Markham. “Even 4-year-olds should have the autonomy to express their preferences.” DEALING WITH THE REVERSE:

If your kid sees more value in athletics than you do, “research coaches and clubs that promote the values you want your child to develop— sportsmanship, commitment, and a focus on development, not results,” says Lauren Gallagher, PhD, a school psychologist and cofounder of Sync It Up Sports. Hit up other parents for the basics (if it’s lacrosse, be prepared to be confused), then just cheer.

You were a flash card– making, straight-A student; your teenager prefers to wing it and isn’t fazed by bad grades. WHY IT’S SO FRUSTR ATING: Because

somewhere deep down, you base your level of success on that of your

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kid. “This is especially prevalent in highly educated communities, where the feeling of competition is heavy in the air,” says Gallagher. “Emphasize learning and hard work, not achievement,” she says. (It matters that he gives it his all, not that he gets an A.) And be available to help when he needs it. Oh, he doesn’t like the assignment? “Create chores in your own home to teach him that sometimes we need to do things we really don’t want to do.” If he’s an athlete, remind him how he works his tail off at practice and leaves it all on the ﬁeld during games—and what a good feeling that gives him. Make that a model for school. “See him for who he is. If he feels that acceptance, he’ll be more likely to take your advice,” says Gallagher. H O W TO M E E T H A L F WAY:

DEALING WITH THE REVERSE:

Celebrate that you’ve got a go-getter you won’t have to bribe to do homework. That said, “you may have to go the other way and help him cope with the disappointment of not always achieving perfection,” says Gallagher. “You want your child to have skills for dealing with failure.” When something doesn’t turn out aces, make a big deal about how he survived. “Help him create a script he can say to himself to keep it all in perspective,” says Gallagher. “ ‘Oh well, no one is perfect. I’ll work hard to do better next time.’ ” Tell him about that time (or times) you got a bad grade and lived.

You have always had a very thick skin; your child might burst into tears if someone looks at her the wrong way. WHY IT’S S O FRUSTR AT ING: “It can be embarrassing to always have the crying kid,” says Suzi Lula, a parenting educator and the author of The Motherhood Evolution. The other kids are happily bouncing in a bounce house, and yours is sobbing because someone cleared her birthday cake before she was ﬁnished. And when you try to quiet her down—“Don’t cry! Don’t cry!”—it only makes things worse. “Telling your child what not to do is about trying to alleviate your anxiety instead of hers,” says Lula. H O W T O M E E T H A L F WAY: Try this simple phrase: “It’s so understandable.” When we accept sensitivity instead of shushing it, kids don’t have to act it out as much. Say, “It’s so understandable you would be upset your cake is gone. I’d be upset, too!” As you empathize, you’ll see her whole body relax, says Lula: “Every child just wants to look up to a grown-up and think, ‘Oh, they see me.’” DE ALING WITH THE REVER SE: Show your kid it’s OK to emote. “We’re taught to push an emotion away—eat it away, spend it away, drink it away,

R E L AT I N G

HOWEVER YOU SLEEP, YOU’RE PROTECTED.

anything but feel it,” says Lula. Model for your child how to communicate feelings in a healthy way. Try, “Honey, I feel sensitive and confused when you roll your eyes. Can you put into words what you are trying to say?”

You were super social and regularly had five-person sleepovers; your child would rather be alone. W H Y I T’S S O F RUST R AT I N G : You’re projecting how you would have felt if you were solo after school. The horror! “An extroverted mom recalls getting so much joy from being in the mix socially,” says Cain. You may also be concerned with keeping up if he’s not involved in 15 after-school activities like the Joneses’ kids.

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H O W T O M E E T H A L F WAY: Ask, “Is my child happy?” “Introverted kids recharge their batteries by spending time alone, so while it may pain you to see it, they are likely content reading a book or painting,” says Cain. But if you suspect social anxiety is holding him back, you can help. Cain suggests saying, “I think you know that you will enjoy this thing, but I can see that you’re uncomfortable, so we’re going to take small steps.” Get to parties at the start so your kid can get his bearings, and stay close by until he’s comfortable. DE ALING WITH THE RE VER SE: Help your social butterﬂy help others. “I remember what it was like to be the shy one,” says Emma Brandt, cofounder of A Mighty Lass, a girls empowerment company in Huntington, New York. “I encourage my extroverted daughter to notice when other kids may be having a tougher time getting involved and try to make them feel comfortable and included.”

What If You’ve Got a Kid Who’s Just Like You? Their “faults” will upset you more because they’re your faults, too. If you struggle with your body type and notice your daughter does as well, it’s easy to project a lifetime of not feeling good enough onto her. Work against that. They need your wisdom, not your commiseration. “My daughter and I are so similar that her experiences trigger my own childhood sadness, and then I forget that I need to be the stoic adult in the room,” says Jennifer Romolini, author of Weird in a World That’s Not. To help your children navigate their stuff, you have to separate yourself, sometimes literally. “I’ll leave the room for a few minutes, take a deep breath, and return to the conversation when I know I can be rational,” says Romolini. But you can tell them you’ve been there. “You’re in a unique position to show them how they can handle an obstacle,” says Cain. “Use specific anecdotes from your own life and focus on the positive outcome.” Just don’t constantly tell them they’re exactly like you. If they think they’re a mini me, they may wind up adopting some of your negative traits (huffing and puffing when you can’t find your keys) because they assume that’s who they are, too. Or they’ll pursue your interests just to please you, which, of course, will probably backfire. Because they actually are different. “No matter how much like you they may seem, kids are still their own people,” says Markham. “It’s important that they know that.”

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H OW TO KE E P FIN A N CE S STR A I G HT (WITH OUT D R I V IN G E ACH OTH E R CR A Z Y) By Nicole Sforza

Sharing your space—whether it’s with a boyfriend, an aging parent, or a college-grad kid—brings with it a pile of money-related questions. How should ﬁnances be handled? Who pays what, and why? Follow these strategies for navigating three potentially fraught situations.

Photographs by Corey Olsen

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

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“ W h e n eve r yo n e h a s c o nt r i b u te d to th e b e s t o f th e i r a b i l i t i e s , th e o u tc o m e i s g ra t i f y i n g .”

“My elderly mother is moving in with our family. What should she pay for, if anything?”

“My boyfriend and I are moving in together—yay! Should we split all the finances?” Some choose to keep accounts separate, while others have a joint account—and it’s a personal preference. But if you decide to go joint, take precautions. “Keep only the amount you need for rent, utilities, and other shared expenses in that account,” says Erin Lowry, author of Broke Millennial: Stop Scraping By and Get Your Financial Life Together. “No one wants to think about it, but if you go through a nasty breakup, your partner can drain the account.” If one of you makes more than the other, have an open conversation about what feels right. In Lowry’s case, she and her boyfriend split the rent and groceries down the middle, even though she outearns him—and he eats a lot more. “It just feels like

98 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

more hassle than it’s worth to break down the receipt,” she says. An alternative is to divvy up expenses by percentage of income. To figure out who owes what, head to countcalculate.com and search for “split payment.” If one person owns the home, it might make sense for the other to help cover part of the mortgage or pay for utilities. But it’s case by case. Maybe the nonhomeowner has debt, and the homeowner doesn’t want to worsen it—or wants to help the partner reduce it. Problems can arise when one person starts slacking, financially speaking. There needs to be an immediate conversation, says Lowry: “Don’t be accusatory off the bat, but bring up missed financial responsibilities and see if there’s a deeper underlying issue.” Did your boyfriend lose work and not tell you? Does he have debt you didn’t know about? Is this common for him? Getting honest answers to these tough questions will clue you in to your shared financial future.

If your mom is comfortable financially, contributing to household expenses can be empowering. “It can help her feel like she’s truly involved and can carry her own weight,” says Ann Meyerson, PhD, a transition counselor and real estate agent in Boca Raton, Florida, who specializes in helping seniors and their families. Often, though, adult children don’t want their parents to open their wallet. That was the case for one of Meyerson’s clients, who was frustrated when she wasn’t “allowed” to contribute. So she set up a college fund for her granddaughters instead. If you’d like financial help but your mom doesn’t have the means, she can assist with cleaning, childcare, or meal prep and use retirement funds and Social Security benefits to cover things like personal expenses and activities. Whatever you decide, make sure these issues are addressed in a practical, nonemotional way before the move. “Clear communication makes for a comfortable multigenerational living situation,” says Meyerson. “When everyone has contributed to the best of their abilities, the outcome is gratifying, and the transition can serve as a model for future generations.”

“My son moved home after college. Should I charge rent? Or give a deadline to move out?” It’s a good idea to charge rent—but instead of pocketing it, put the money toward an IRA for your son, says Christopher Carosa, a financial expert and the author of Hey! What’s My Number? How to Increase the Odds You Will Retire in Comfort. That way, you’ll be teaching him to save and understand the value of interest. Your son should also pay for expenses like transportation to and from work and discretionary meals and entertainment. As for a move-out deadline, rather than picking some arbitrary time period, frame it in terms of measurable financial objectives, says Carosa: Maybe you decide to let your kid stay at home until he reduces his school loan by half. Launch adult children right by giving them specific responsibilities and some modest money goals. “In our family, we have a tradition where, upon receiving your first full-time paycheck and after every raise, you treat the family to a nice meal,” says Carosa. “Including personal and family-related goals reinforces the idea that financial independence means supporting others, not just yourself.”

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1 COME UP WITH A FEW IDEAS

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Earn Money in Your Free Time DISCOVER YOUR SIDE HUSTLE W I T H O U R S T E P - BY- S T E P P L A N .

L A I K A O N E / STO C K SY

By Kathleen Murray Harris

Here’s a secret: You don’t have to quit your day job to bring in extra cash. Whether you already have an idea brewing, want to sample a new career before taking the leap, or aren’t working and want to get back into the game, starting a side hustle is easier than you think. Plus, it brings the benefits of added job security and personal satisfaction. “Just start where you are and take action,” says Chris Guillebeau, author of Side Hustle: From Idea to Income in 27 Days. Here’s how.

Think about skills or assets you already have. An unused basement could be turned into a Pilates studio; a veteran teacher can sell lesson plans. If you know a lot about fish tanks, you could write a product review blog and earn affiliate revenue (basically, the small percentage of sales you get when people buy via your link). Or look around and see what piques your interest. “Curiosity is an underappreciated business skill,” says Guillebeau. When Marc Gaskins noticed candles being sold for $85 in an upscale men’s store, inspiration (and motivation) struck. Gaskins, who owns a restaurant equipment rental company in Charleston, South Carolina, began researching the candlemaking business by watching DIY YouTube videos and talking with candle suppliers. His candle company, Meeting and Market, launched soon after.

2 D EC I D E O N T H E B E S T CONCEPT

Focus on the idea that’s the most feasible to pull off quickly and without a ton of investment. Also consider which idea you’re most excited about—this will be happening in your personal time, after all. “Don’t overthink it,” says Guillebeau. “You’re not making a lifelong decision.” Then answer these questions to evaluate

whether it’s a viable option: What’s the actual product or service you’re selling? Is there a clear group of people who are potentially interested in buying this? If yes, keep going.

3 M E A S U R E P RO F I T P OT E N T I A L

The biggest question: Can you make money off this? You’ll need to approximate here—if you’re selling a product, how much would it cost you to make it? How much of your time will be required? What do you need to invest in, whether people or equipment and supplies? Then, how much would you need to charge to make a profit? Will a customer pay that? Keep it broad and don’t let your idea get stuck in the numbers. “Paralysis by analysis will get you nowhere,” says Julie Wilder, who uses her graphic design talent to create Spiral Spectrum astrology calendars, sold on Etsy and Amazon. “You can always change the price. If no one’s buying it, lower it. If you’re sold out, raise your price.”

4 L AU N C H B E F O R E YO U T H I N K YO U ’ R E R E A DY

Get to action, says Guillebeau: “The biggest mistake people make is waiting for perfection before going to market.” Create a sample product and host informal focus groups for input. Gaskins started making candles and giving them to family and friends; once that feedback was positive, he began to sell them at local farmers markets. Once those sold out, he knew he was onto something. If you’re

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

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I N V E S T W I S E LY

nervous, try out your idea on starter platforms, existing websites where you can sell or advertise your service. Try Etsy for product sellers, Fiverr for freelance services, or Skillshare for online educators.

To attract new customers, it can be tempting to buy a trade show booth or launch a massive marketing campaign. And while these can be important for growing a big business, try to think of your side hustle as a “strategically slow startup,” says Wilder. To keep your risk low and your profit margin high, spend only on items that are crucial for running your business, like a website or product supplies. Julia Baldwin and her husband, Richard Kotulski, had an idea for a late-night cookie delivery service in Portland, Oregon, but

TA P I N TO YO U R SO CIAL NET WORK

Talk to everyone in your circle about your new business idea. “You never know who can help you,” says Baldwin. “We got our commercial mixer and refrigerator on loan from a friend who had them collecting dust in his garage.” Social media can also be your best free marketing tool. Wilder joined astrologybased Facebook groups, listened to her potential customers, and, after becoming an active member of a group, shared links to her

calendars. Those members then shared the links with others. For After Dark Cookies, an Instagram post from the first customer led to three more orders on the very same weekend.

7 CHECK ALL THE L E G A L B OX E S

You may need a license, depending on the nature of your side hustle. Someone entering the food or music industry may have to do more paperwork than, say, a chef who’s walking dogs on the side. Google “business license” for your state. Many cost $100 or less, says Guillebeau. If you’re spending a large chunk of your time figuring out how to handle incoming money and if you’re making enough that it could put you in a new tax bracket, it’s probably time to hire an accountant.

8 K E E P AT I T A N D EMBR ACE CHANGE

You’re going to make mistakes, but don’t get discouraged. “My approach to this is very much like a gardener’s,” says Wilder. “If a flower isn’t growing, maybe it needs more sun or it’s in the wrong spot. Tinker with it until you figure out how to make it bloom.” Baldwin’s trick is to remind herself not to take it too seriously. “I never considered how much satisfaction and joy I would get out of something that is purely ours,” she says. “Even the simple idea of cookie delivery.” Thinking about a career change? For five smart strategies, go to realsimple .com/careerswitch.

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ASK BUCKY Time Inc.’s* allknowing, straightshooting senior vice president of talent management, Bucky Keady, tackles your workplace conundrums. My manager has asked me to watch his cat while he’s on vacation. Must I say yes? If you have become friends and this is an organic request, then that’s a very fluid and normal thing. But if you don’t have that kind of relationship, you should absolutely say no. You shouldn’t feel coerced into doing something like that. This is the kind of thing that needs to be nipped in the bud early on, because if you say yes the first time you are asked, it will be hard to go back. In response, you can say something like, “You know I love my job, and I hope you see how fully committed I am to you and the company. I also don’t mind doing a few personal things for you at work, but when it comes to outside business hours, I am not comfortable doing personal favors.” If true, you could also say you’ve dog walked or house-sat in the past but charge when you do those jobs on the side. GOT A QUESTION FOR BUCKY? SEND IT TO ASKBUCKY@ REALSIMPLE.COM. * TIME INC. IS THE PARENT COMPANY OF REAL SIMPLE.

Illustration by Uli Knörzer

ALEXIS COURTNEY/OFFSET

didn’t want to sink a lot of money into it. Once they found a great (and affordable) kitchen space, they decided to do a soft launch of After Dark Cookies. “We wanted to test the idea without requiring a lot of up-front capital,” says Kotulski. What they did invest in: ingredients and customer service. “It’s all about making the customer happy,” he adds.

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SANDRA OH LIN, 42, founder of KiwiCo, maker of Kiwi Crate for kids The key thing for me is to always try to be present for my three children. Often that means putting the phone somewhere else physically. The door is always open for an e-commerce business, so on weekends I usually check my email in the morning and once in the evening. It’s absolutely a challenge, but I don’t feel an urgency to respond to email right away. During the day on the weekend is my time with my family. That is my priority.

How They Do It

W H AT I S YO U R E M A I L POLICY ON WEEKENDS?

ALINA VILLASANTE, 56, founder of Peace Love World Clothing

By Jane Por ter

104 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

I love being able to communicate directly with people, and I’m constantly finding inspiration that I want to send to my team or assistant on the weekend. But we have an unwritten rule at work: I don’t expect an email reply right away. My team will accumulate all that inspiration, and then we’ll have a meeting and go over it all on Monday. I also have specific times when I don’t look at my phone— when I’m working out, on vacation, or having dinner with my boyfriend.

DAN CALISTA, 43, founder and CEO of Vynamic, a healthcare-industry consulting firm I’m a husband and a dad to three children. I used to check email late at night and during the weekend and never had downtime. So I enacted a new company policy: We don’t send email from 10 p.m. to 6 a.m. on weekdays and at all on weekends. It creates an opportunity for open think time, and by Monday we are recharged and ready to dive back in.

4 TARA L. LATTOMUS, 46, attorney for Eckert Seamans Cherin & Mellott, LLC As a hospitality lawyer, I negotiate hotel and resort agreements around the world, so I receive email day and night. Unless it’s urgent, I check email before I walk out of the office on Fridays, then not again until Saturday morning. During the day, I leave my phone charging in my bedroom. Otherwise it’s too easy to jump on it and spend an hour doing something.

For five email management tips, go to realsimple .com/emailtips.

5 AUDIE CHAMBERLAIN, founder and CEO of Lion & Orb, a public relations agency After work, I put my phone in a drawer and don’t look at it until my daughter is in bed. I use the VIP setting, which allows an urgent message from a client to come through even if the phone is in “do not disturb” mode. Direct communication also reduces my time spent responding to people. If someone writes me a long email, I pick up the phone or, if possible, walk over to their desk.

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Ahhh... Ritual and repetition are part of what makes the practice of yoga transporting. As we breathe through sun salutations, the repetition of movement aligns our body and mind. But rituals need not be confined to yoga. Consider how you approach something as mundane as making the bed or brewing coffee. As with yoga, we start with the breath. Take a moment to pause and focus on the present. Consider why you’re doing what you’re doing. When we are aware of the self-care involved in our routines, our joy in doing them increases. Witness the precision of your movements. Feel the texture of the linen. Savor the aroma of the coffee. You know how to do these things by rote, but can you slow down to appreciate the satisfaction of a tidy bedroom and a nourishing cup?

M AT T A R M E N D A R I Z / O F F S E T

By Edward Jones, wheelandaxle.net

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MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME Stylist Emily Henderson‘s new house in Los Angeles is organized, inspiring...and decorated for real life. S h e i nv i t e d Re a l S i m p l e ove r fo r a n exc l u s i ve v i s i t . BY STEPHANIE SIS CO

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P H OTO G R A P H S BY T E S S A N E U S TA DT

Emily and husband Brian share an ice cream treat with their kids, Elliot, 2, and Charlie, 4.

Emily favors vintage rugs because they mask any debris the kids track inside. If they ’re threadbare from years of use, she plumps them up with an extra-thick rug pad beneath.

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S B U S Y parents of two young kids, super stylist Emily Henderson and her husband, Brian, aimed to create a space where they could really live—a home where nothing is too precious and everything is easy to maintain. “This isn’t the time in our life to worry about water rings on the side table,” says the Target home-style expert. Instead, she chose pieces that would hide imperfections (the patterned living room rug) and patina with use (the leather trunk turned accent table). An avid ﬂea market shopper, Emily suggests homing in on items made with leather, aged wood, and unlacquered brass to achieve a similar well-worn effect.

SHOP THE LO OK: Threshold Rodney wooden armchairs, $230 each, Threshold wall art, $70, and Project 62 Linework throw pillow, $20; target .com. Noren striped pillows, $40 each; cb2.com. Olivia coffee table, $1,573; luluandgeorgia.com. Henderson sofa; ciscohome.net for info. Ceramic bells (above piano), from $185; mquan.com.

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Emily opted to paint the walls of the main living spaces shades of gray and white so the furniture and accent pieces could give her home the character she craved. “You can mix however many styles you want as long as you have a consistent color palette peppered evenly throughout,” she says. Here, lighter wood tones accented with blues and greens make the blend of classic and contemporary elements look purposeful. Every corner of Emily’s home incorporates a balance of the two styles:

Midcentury dining chairs offset the antique farmhouse table, while the vintage pendant light above the island counteracts the more modern barstools. Then she softened each living space with an assortment of pillows and textiles, fabric window treatments, and upholstered furniture pieces. “The downstairs is where we spend the majority of our time together, spilling outside when friends come to visit,” says Emily. “So we tried to make each area on that ﬂoor as inviting as possible.”

gathering spot The patio tile was an investment, says Emily, but since it’s visible from the kitchen, dining room, and living room, she decided it was worth the cost. If you’re going to splurge, she says, do so on a statement-making element, like tile or wallpaper. SHOP THE LO OK: (Above left) Paint on island: Green Smoke, $99 per gallon; farrow-ball.com. Barbican stools, $379 each; hedgehousefurniture.com. (Above right) Burgos custom tile; granadatile.com for info. Threshold Mantega faux-wood folding patio dining table (similar to shown), $280, and Threshold Standish club chairs, $300 for 2; target.com. (Opposite page) Deep-blue drinking glasses, $20 each, and Khadi towel (as runner), $65; lostandfoundshop.com. Pembridge stripe napkins, $40 for 4; thewhitecompany.com. Threshold Graham stainless-steel gold flatware, $2 each, and Threshold Vista library cabinet with glass, $220; target.com.

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P R O P S B Y S T E P H E N PA P PA S ; H A I R A N D M A K E U P B Y D A N I E L L E WA L C H ; WA R D R O B E S T Y L I N G B Y J O R D A N R U D D ; P R O D U C E D B Y B R A N D O N Z A G H A

twists on a theme Emily used beadboard paneling in Charlie’s room (above), wallpaper in Elliot’s room (above right), and a combination in the master bath (right) to give these rooms extra personality. SHOP THE LO OK: (Above) Paint: Sharkskin; portolapaints .com for info. Pillowfort Robinson kids’ bed, $400, and Pillowfort X Marks the Spot sheet set, $25 (full); target.com. Ombré stripe pillow, $189; rebeccaatwood.com. Jute & Cotton bunting, $32; thewhitecompany.com. Lynwood sconce, $250; rejuvenation.com for similar. Start With Yes print, $199; schoolhouse.com. (Above right) Hua Trees wall mural, from $105 per panel; sianzeng.com. White 2-bin Storagepalooza, $199; landofnod.com. Pillowfort house cubby wall shelf, $30; target.com. Lanna sheepskin rug, $369; article .com. (Right) Paint: Stiffkey Blue, $99 per gallon, and Aranami wallpaper, $230 per roll; farrow-ball.com. (Opposite page) Madeline Grande dresser; englishfarmhousefurniture .com for info. Steel & Wood leaning ladder, $50; food52.com. Woven throw blanket, $349; rebeccaatwood.com.

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For more photos of and product info for Emily’s home, visit realsimple.com/henderson.

For a relaxing bedroom, keep it simple and symmetrical. Emily centered her dresser on the wall and anchored it with one large painting.

You’re alive during the N O I S I E S T P E R I O D O F H U M A N H I S T O RY,

and it’s having powerful effects on your body, mind, and mood. Happily, you can turn down the volume.

Reclaim your

PE ACE and

QUIET BY FLORENCE WILLIAMS PHOTO GR APHS BY JAMIE CHUNG

T H I S M O R N I N G , as I often do, I walked with my dog by the Potomac River along a pretty stretch managed by the National Park Service. Both of us watched a pair of nesting mallards, and I spotted a couple of hawks circling overhead. A great blue heron flew by, all gangly and prehistoric. It could have and should have been a blissful moment of repose from D.C.’s urban frenzy. But above the hawks was a disruptive blast of low-flying commercial airplanes, interrupted only by the heartshaking thumps of a helicopter. Noise is defined as unwanted sound, and modern life is full of it. The world’s background-noise levels are likely louder now than at any point in human history.

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Noise is one of the great unsung reasons that modern life takes a toll on us. U N WA N T E D N O I S E I S H A R D E R TO BLO CK OUT THAN U N WA N T E D S I G H T S . We hear

P R O P ST Y L I N G BY M EG U M I E M OTO ; I C O N S , G E T T Y I M AG E S

things even when we sleep.

More of us live in urban areas—half the population of the planet—and with us comes our worldly din. Suburbs and rural areas have hardly escaped: Traffic on U.S. roads has nearly tripled in the past 30 years, and the number of passenger planes keeps rising and is expected to increase by as much as 50 percent by 2032. I never knew how much noise bothered me until I moved from the Rocky Mountains to D.C. several years ago. Even though my new city is ﬁlled with greenery, parks, and trails, it’s hard to escape a pollutant that is both invisible and pervasive. Above my medium-density neighborhood, more than 800 aircraft ﬂy every day to and from Reagan National Airport. I notice the airplanes the most but also the sirens, service trucks, and construction equipment, not to mention all the sounds of competitive lawn maintenance. I often feel on edge, like it is hard to take a truly deep breath. Peace and quiet—as well as the sweet sounds of nature—can be important to achieving true relaxation. As Erling Kagge, the polar explorer and author of the forthcoming Silence in the Age of Noise, puts it, “Silence in itself is rich. It is exclusive and luxurious. A key to unlock new ways of thinking…a deeper form of experiencing life.” Kagge knows silence; he once spent 50 days plodding around Antarctica by himself. Because I was interested in learning more about how my new urban environment was affecting my well-being after my move, I borrowed a portable brain wave– monitoring device for my head and started wearing it around like a crown of thorns. My kids tried to steal it because of the cool sensors. The neighborhood dog walkers cut me a wide swath. I persevered. I wanted to see how my brain was responding to all the noise around me. So I wore the machine along the Potomac trails, but my nervous system was too busy noticing the jets. The device’s software spit out an interpretation of my mental state: “This indicates that in this state you were actively processing information and, perhaps, that you should relax more often!” That’s the thing about noise. It demands high-powered

effort on our part, both to interpret it (is it a threat?) and to block it out. It’s one of the great unsung reasons that modern life takes a toll on us. And it’s a bigger one than most of us think. Unwanted noise is harder to block out than unwanted sights. We hear things even when we sleep. I’VE NOTICED THAT not all my neighbors are as annoyed as I am. “I don’t even notice the planes,” says Lauri Menditto, who has lived here for 20 years. Another neighbor, Nick Keenan, has a theory: There are two kinds of people— those who become increasingly sensitive to noise and those who learn to tolerate it. Some people download apps that play sounds that connote nostalgia, like train horns. It’s hard to imagine anyone would actually want to listen to low-ﬂying jets, however. It turns out Nick is partly right. Many of us can become habituated to noise, at least somewhat. But there is a hard-core minority, about 20 percent of people, who will remain irritated by loud, common sounds. We are more sensitive to stimuli. And some of us are so annoyed that we go to extremes. Consider the case of 82-yearold Pennsylvanian Frank Parduski Sr., who reportedly ran out to confront an offending motorcyclist, only to continued on page 122

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Create Your Own Data In 2010, John Fairweather and his wife were so fed up with the Santa Monica Airport that they were considering a move. For a long time, residents tolerated the airport, which was mostly used by hobby pilots, but then it became a popular stop for jets and helicopters. So Fairweather, who owns a software company that he runs out of his home, started dig-

ging. Believing that knowledge is power, he rallied volunteers to count planes, log tail numbers, and measure decibels. “We needed to create a more informed debate so something could be done,” he says. He handed his findings to the city council, which took up the issue and later settled with the Federal Aviation Administration to allow for the closure of the aiport after 2028.

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continued from page 119

be run over. New Scientist magazine called the poor fellow “the world’s first anti-noise martyr.” Ted Rueter is another of The Annoyed. Rueter, who suffers from noise-related headaches and fatigue, once boldly bought a neighbor an outdoor sweeper, a quieter alternative to a leaf blower. He delivered the gift with brownies. But his neighbor returned the offerings, and the near-daily gas-powered lawn care continued unabated. When Rueter left the University of California, Los Angeles, where he taught political science, he decided to take up the cause. Now he runs Noise Free America, a North Carolina–based coalition of dozens of citizen groups working to strengthen regulations and enforcement around the nation. “Noise definitely wears me out,” he says. “I think a lot of people are of the belief that noise is a nuisance we have to live with rather than a significant health problem.” It can be a hard battle to wage, he says, because it’s a pollutant you don’t see. Nor do you see the damage, as you would smog or a dirt-clogged river. I feel Rueter’s pain. These days the suburbs, especially if they’re leafy, can be just as loud as urban areas. Leaf blowers, along with lawn mowers, circular saws, surveillance helicopters, and the omnipotent planes, regularly impinge on my home-office shed, which has a roof about as thick as a sardine tin. Leaf blowers, I learned, can spin screamingly fast—up to about 8,000 rpm. Their high, whining pitch is particularly grating, falling somewhere between a baby with colic and a table saw approaching your cranium. H E A R I N G D E V E L O P S before vision in the womb. It is our dominant sense when it comes to sudden threats. It tells us something is out there and from which direction it’s coming, triggering our strongest startle reaction. In fact, mammalian ears can be incredibly sensitive. When Carl Linnaeus was deciding what to call our class of animals in 1735, he had a few unique characteristics to name us after, including our mammary glands and our fine inner ear structure. Clearly he was a boob guy. Our three delicate ear bones, our eardrums, and our pinnae—the hairs that deliver vibrating molecules into the brain, where they are processed as “sound”—may have evolved in early mammals in part to help them locate insects for food. This may be why human ears today are especially tuned to high-pitched sounds like mosquitoes and, yes, leaf blowers.

One in two millennials shows early signs of hearing loss, mostly from excessively loud music in their headphones. HEARING IS ONE OF O U R G R E AT S U P E R P O W E R S , AND YET WE ARE C AVA L I E R LY G I V I N G I T U P.

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Health experts have long been concerned about noise because of its threat to hearing. Loud noises, whether at chronic levels over time or in sudden bursts, damage the pinnae, leading to permanent hearing loss. Across the U.S., a quarter of adults ages 20 to 69 show signs of noise-induced hearing impairment, and a recent study in Ireland found that one in two millennials shows early signs of hearing loss, mostly from excessively loud music in their headphones. Hearing is one of our great superpowers, and yet we are cavalierly giving it up. Sound is measured in decibels (dB), and the scale increases logarithmically, so that 65 dB is 10 times as loud as 55 dB and 100 times as loud as 45 dB. Sixty decibels is high enough to drown out normal speech, and anything over 85 dB (such as busy city traffic) can damage hearing over time. The airplane noise in my neighborhood logs in at about 55 dB in an average 24-hour period, but individual planes can spike much louder, sometimes at 5:30 in the morning. This signiﬁcantly exceeds the World Health Organization’s recommended limit of 40 dB at night to prevent sleep disturbance. If you think noise doesn’t bug you, research suggests you may be fooling yourself. Studies show that even when people sleep through loud noises, their nervous systems are still responding as if preparing to wake and run if need be. This takes a toll. “What we’re learning from quite a lot of studies is hearing loss may be just the tip of the iceberg,” says public health expert Richard Neitzel, associate professor of environmental health sciences at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor. “As more research comes out, we see associations with heart attacks and high blood pressure, and guess what: That’s what kills Americans most. We are ignoring this at our peril. Noise is not just a nuisance to be accepted as a by-product of modern life. It can be just as bad for us as other pollutants we’ve been regulating, like ozone and particulate air pollution.” Sound gets delivered to deep parts of our brain that are connected to the centers for fear and arousal. With

enough rumbles and roars, our nervous systems can become stressed-out over time, says Neitzel. This is why people living in noisier neighborhoods have up to a 17 percent higher risk of cardiovascular diseases, including stroke and hypertension. Old and young people seem to be especially at risk. Scientists have also found associations between increasing noise levels and the release of stress hormones. Alarmingly, more than 20 studies have shown that noise pollution can affect children’s learning outcomes and cognitive performance. Some children in the Netherlands and the United Kingdom whose schools sit under ﬂight paths or near busy airports show poorer reading comprehension and memory than children at quieter schools, even after adjusting for income and parental education. In fact, for every ﬁve-decibel aircraft noise increase, the reading scores dropped by the equivalent of a one- or two-month delay. A L L O F W H I C H leads to the question, What is a city or suburb dweller to do? It turns out, people have been asking this question for a long time. Many of the loudest city sounds come from vehicles, which was true even before the dawn of cars and trucks. Ancient Rome was said to have banned chariots at night. The Found-

C A S E S T U DY: N E W TO N , M A

Chat Up Your Neighbors Karen Lane Bray thought she was alone in her loathing of the gaspowered leaf blowers in Newton, Massachusetts. Then she read a newspaper op-ed by a woman who was starting a group to push for a ban. Bray, who eventually took over the whole effort, set out to talk to as many Newtonians as possible. “The best way to make change with your neighbors is to

develop relationships with them,” she says. She canvassed outside the supermarket and library wearing a sign that said ASK ME ABOUT CHANGING LEAF BLOWER LAWS. Soon she had hundreds of people to call on for support at city hall hearings. In January, the city banned gas leaf blowers between Memorial Day and Labor Day and required all blowers to be 65 decibels or quieter all year.

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Peer pressure helps. In Muir Woods in Northern California, the National Park Service simply P U T U P S I G N S D E S I G N AT I N G A Q U I E T Z O N E A RO U N D T H E B I G G E S T, M O S T M A J E S T I C T R E E S .

And people listened.

ing Fathers in Philadelphia had the cobblestone streets covered with dirt lest their important work be disturbed. In 1907, Manhattan socialite Julia Barnett Rice founded the Society for the Suppression of Unnecessary Noise. Its main campaign was focused on tugboats, which blew their horns more than 1,000 times a day. Mark Twain was an early supporter. Unlike the airport activists in my neighborhood, Rice was successful: Congress passed legislation restricting horn blowing. But then came the wider use of the automobile, and city noise was to grow and not stop. Soon the car cacophony was joined by sirens, jackhammers, skill saws, leaf blowers, airplanes, helicopters, and subways. Today Guangzhou, China, is the loudest city in the world, followed by Delhi, Cairo, and Mumbai, according to research compiled by the World Health Organization and Mimi, a hearing-technology company. The quietest cities all lie within Europe: Zurich, then Vienna, Oslo, Munich, and Stockholm. That’s because the European Union takes noise seriously, both funding research into health effects and regulating industrial equipment to protect workers from hearing loss. Germany even discourages lawn mowing on Sundays. (Though between runway expansions and an increasing number of ﬂights, the airports in Europe are still a source of irritation for many residents.) Thanks to the federal deregulation movement in the 1980s, the United States follows a much more local—and often lax—approach to sound regulation. This is why, says Rueter, it’s so important for citizens to speak up and defend their right to relative peace. A number of communities, including Los Angeles and other cities in California, have successfully lobbied to ban gaspowered leaf blowers. What has replaced them? Battery-powered ones, which are improving in power and are several orders of magnitude quieter. Airport noise here, as in Europe, is harder to tackle. Santa Monica, California, is scheduled to close its airport after 2028. The posh resort town of East Hampton, New York, logged more than 30,000 noise complaints against

its airport in 2015. But when the town tried to impose nighttime curfews on ﬂights, a federal appeals court ruled that the town had to obtain Federal Aviation Administration approval ﬁrst. East Hampton lost its bid to go to the Supreme Court in June, but local officials plan to keep working on the noise issue. T H AT WO N ’ T B E happening in my hometown anytime soon. After reading the European health studies, I installed a decibel meter app on my phone. To my children’s amusement, I now sometimes run around, phone outstretched, measuring the noise levels in and out of the house. Distressingly, they are similar to levels associated with hypertension and learning delays. Apart from moving, there are some steps we can take. I now often wear noise-canceling headphones while working at home. I tell my teenagers, frequently, to turn down their music and protect their ears. But, being teenagers, they tend to wave me off. In this they are not unlike most Americans when it comes to auditory concerns. Perhaps we have ignored noise pollution for so long because we are visual creatures, suggests Colorado State University postdoctoral researcher Rachel Buxton, PhD. She’s been studying the detrimental effects of noise on

C A S E S T U DY: E L K H A RT, I N

Meet with Your Mayor Bradley Vite, an art dealer and real estate broker who suffers from tinnitus and heightened noise sensitivity, spent twoplus decades lobbying for antinoise laws in Elkhart, Indiana—until, in 2008, the city agreed to designate a noise enforcement police officer, whose sole job will be to issue $250 to $2,500 citations for nuisances like excessively loud cars. Over the

years, Vite sent letters to council members and state senators, but he says meeting with the mayor proved most effective. “He’s like the CEO,” he says. “If the mayor is supportive and has a good relationship with the council, that’s the first step.” Bring your city leader articles like this one to reference issues and stats; noisefree.org has printable guides. And be persistent, says Vite: “I had to go through three mayors before I finally got a noise enforcement officer.”

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the mating and feeding patterns of wildlife, including birds. She’s also been mapping and modeling sound throughout the nation. Despite the problems she sees and the steady growth of noise over time, she’s optimistic: “We have the technology and methods to manage noise pollution.” She points to recent innovations like “quiet pavement” that muffles traffic noise, quieter home and yard machines, and strategies to consolidate aircraft noise over roads. Peer pressure helps, too. In Muir Woods in Northern California, the National Park Service simply put up signs designating a quiet zone around the biggest, most majestic trees. “And people listened,” she said. “No pun intended.” Neitzel from the University of Michigan thinks we may have reached Peak Noise. Soon, he hopes, we will read the studies, come to our senses, and start enforcing reasonable limits to find peace once again. In the meantime, I will keep searching for peace on my own. On a recent short vacation in Maine, I woke up very early and headed down to a small, hill-rimmed lake. I clamped down the EEG cap and slid into a kayak. Paddling through a foot of soft mist resting on the water’s surface, I headed across, toward a generous expanse of the White Mountain National Forest on the far shore. I couldn’t see my blade, but I could hear its drips, as well as the birds of morning along the shadowed woods. A few jets flew overhead, but they seemed very far away. I filled my lungs with the moist air and the sun and the birdsong, and I gently floated the boat along. Once I returned and uploaded the data, I got this message: “Even with your eyes open… you enter a relaxed state very easily.” Finally I had tricked the machine into thinking I was some sort of bodhisattva. For a few moments on a quiet lake, I was.

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How to ask for

SILENCE Not all loud situations can be solved with a mute button. R E A L S I M P L E ’ S E T I Q U E T TE E X P E RT has suggestions for navigating other people’s noise with grace. BY C AT H E R I N E N E W M A N

Everyday noises set me off. I can’t stand to be around people who click their pens or crack their knuckles. Don’t even get me started on loud chewers or constant sniffers. I always want to ask them to stop, but because other people aren’t bothered, I feel like I’m the weird one. Is it unfair to ask this?

Misophonia—meaning “hatred of sound”— is a condition in which certain noises trigger extreme agitation. It’s not an officially recognized diagnosis, and it’s a fairly new field of research, but just knowing you’re not “weird” or alone might help. Your fellow sufferers have generated lots of coping strategies. Always carrying headphones is one. Music, podcasts, or white noise can provide respite. But you’ll need a different plan for social situations and work meetings. A friend of mine who suffers around eating noises puts on music during dinner and sits by the speaker—and I much prefer this solution to not enjoying his company at all. Which raises a different point: How you handle incidents will depend on the nature of your relationships. You don’t want to tell a client that the clicking of his pen makes you fantasize about snatching it and shoving it in your ear, but you could say to a close friend, “I’m so sorry. You know how undone I am by tiny sounds! Can I get you a rubber ball to squeeze? The pen clicking is kind of killing me.”

I work in an office with an open floor plan, so I often hear what my coworkers are doing. Most of it is just background noise now, but one coworker talks on the phone constantly. He calls his wife in the middle of the day and talks with clients when he could email them. Sometimes his calls are conducted in his second language (nothing to do with our business), which gets very distracting. What can I say to make him put the phone down? I often do my writing work in a café because I find the ambient noise pleasantly focusing. But there’s another patron who often sits next to me and jiggles his leg up and down, which makes his stool rock on the floor, which distracts and irritates me. But I am at a public place that I could choose to leave. You are at work, where you have to be. I would take one of two approaches. The first: Speak directly with your coworker. Say, “I’m so sorry to be a pain, but my attention span seems to be shrinking, and I find myself super distracted by your conversations. Would you be willing to take your personal calls outside?” The second: Talk to a manager. Without naming names, explain that you’re distracted by an abundance of personal calls and ask if there’s a policy that could be articulated more forcefully. While you’re at it, you might check whether there’s a quieter part of the office you could move to or whether your employer might be willing to invest in a pair of noise-canceling headphones. Short of that, there are always earplugs, which you can try wearing conspicuously, poking right out of your head, to offer visual representation of your plight.

I plan to throw a party in my backyard that could get loud, between the 30 relatives and friends, the kids in the pool, and the music from our speakers. What’s the best way to keep the peace in the neighborhood? Do I have to invite my neighbors as a courtesy, or can I just give them a warning about the party?

Considerate neighbors are a treasure, and you are one— your potentially cacophonous party notwithstanding. You care, and that matters. Sure, it would be extra neighborly to extend an invitation, but it’s not necessary. Giving a heads-up is thoughtful enough. Do this in person. Be solicitous (“I want to apologize in advance!”) and appreciative (“Thank you so much for understanding!”). If you can, offer a back-end limit. Then, when they hear “Marco! Polo!” and a thumping bass, your neighbors will remember that you cared enough to warn them. They’ll be more likely to extend you the benefit of the doubt than to seethe (or call the police).

My neighbor’s dog barks constantly. He barks at the wind. He barks at my kids when they’re in our backyard. He can even see when I’m in my kitchen, and he barks at me through the window. It’s not only loud but also frightening. How do you recommend I confront my neighbor? Oof. You are in the belly of the beast, problem-wise. Start in good faith by approaching your neighbor in a peaceable, brainstorming mode. After all, this is not a leaf blower we’re talking about (though it blows). It’s a pet he doubtless loves. “Can we please problem-solve about your dog’s barking? We’re kind of at our wit’s end, and I’m sure it’s driving you crazy, too.” Maybe you will even burst into tears during this conversation because you are so tired from being up all night fantasizing about ducttaping the dog’s muzzle, and maybe that won’t be the worst thing. Come ready to offer ideas: getting the dog professionally trained, keeping the dog away from the windows, chipping in on a fence or some shrubs to separate your properties, crating the dog at night. Then try to get your neighbor to articulate a next step so your concern won’t just evaporate into the din. If the owner is unresponsive or hostile, though, you may have to pursue an escalated course of action—the kind that doesn’t maintain neighborliness so well—such as looking into municipal laws. Just be mindful about what you set in motion. If you like your neighbor and he’s forced to give up his pet, the conscience-stabbing silence may prove worse than the barking.

I was in a restaurant, and a woman at the next table was playing Candy Crush on her phone. I politely told her that the noise from the game was really loud and asked if she could turn it down. She did turn it down but retaliated by telling my companion and me that our conversation was too loud and was annoying her. Should I have done anything differently? It’s totally unacceptable to play a loud video game in a restaurant. After all, earbuds exist for just such occasions! Not including the occasion of a face-to-face conversation, which they can’t help with. It’s fine that you said something, and it’s good that you were polite about it. The Candy Crusher was petty and aggrieved afterward? So be it. Maybe she was embarrassed about her behavior, or maybe she’s a jerk. Regardless, there was nothing to do but pipe down a notch and let it go.

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F i s h Ta c o s with Broccoli Slaw and Cumin Sour Cream

when fresh met freezer Start with some icebox staples. Add a few farmers market favorites. Result: these easy, beautiful meals. Recipes by D awn Perr y Photographs by Jennifer Causey

To m a t o Ta r t with Mustard Crème Fraîche

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F i s h Ta c o s with Broccoli Slaw and Cumin Sour Cream AC T I V E T I M E : 1 5 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E : 2 5 M I N U T E S S E RV E S : 4

2 10-oz. packages frozen fish sticks 12 oz. broccoli (about 2 crowns) small red onion, thinly sliced Juice of 2 limes, plus lime wedges for serving 1 tsp. kosher salt, divided 1 cup cilantro leaves and tender stems 2 Tbsp. olive oil cup sour cream tsp. ground cumin 8 corn or flour tortillas, warmed fish sticks according to package directions.

COOK

divide broccoli tops from stalks; finely chop tops. Peel stalks with a vegetable peeler and cut into matchsticks. Place onion, lime juice, and teaspoon salt in a large bowl. Toss to combine and set aside to marinate, about 10 minutes. Add broccoli tops and stalks, cilantro, and oil and toss to combine.

Sausage and Cheddar Stuffed Onions

sour cream, cumin, and remaining teaspoon salt in a small bowl. Spread tortillas with sour cream mixture. Break up fish sticks and divide among tortillas. Top each taco with broccoli slaw and serve remaining slaw on the side. Serve with lime wedges. WHISK

AC T I V E T I M E : 3 0 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E : 1 H O U R , 40 MINUTES S E RV E S : 4

6 medium yellow onions, trimmed, peeled, and halved pole to pole 3 Tbsp. olive oil, divided tsp. kosher salt, divided tsp. freshly ground black pepper 12 oz. frozen sweet Italian sausage (about 3 links), defrosted, casings removed cup chopped parsley leaves, plus more for serving 1 cup panko, divided 4 oz. grated white Cheddar (about 1 cup), divided

oven to 425°F. Arrange onions, cut sides up, in a 9-by-13-inch baking dish. Drizzle with 2 tablespoons oil and season with teaspoon salt and the pepper. Add cup water to dish, cover tightly with foil, and roast until onions are tender when pierced with a knife, 45 to 50 minutes. Uncover and let cool slightly. PREHEAT

combine sausage, parsley, cup panko, and half the cheese in a medium bowl, breaking up sausage as you mix. MEANWHILE,

WHEN onions are done, remove inner layers of each

130 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

onion half, leaving outer few layers intact, and transfer to a food processor; pulse until roughly chopped. Add chopped onions to sausage mixture and mix until evenly combined. Divide sausage mixture among onion halves. remaining cheese, cup panko, 1 tablespoon oil, and teaspoon salt in a medium bowl and mix with your fingers until evenly combined. Dividing evenly, place panko mixture on top of sausage mixture. Return dish to oven and bake, uncovered, until tops are golden, 20 to 25 minutes. Serve topped with parsley leaves. COMBINE

FOOD ST YLING BY CHEL SE A ZIMMER; PROP ST YLING BY CL AIRE SPOLLEN

MEANWHILE,

S h e e t Tr a y Shrimp and Po t a to e s with Lemon

AC T I V E T I M E : 1 5 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E : 4 5 M I N U T E S S E RV E S : 4

lb. baby potatoes 2 orange bell peppers, sliced into planks 1 bunch scallions, cut into 2-in. pieces 2 lemons, thinly sliced, plus lemon wedges for serving cup plus 1 Tbsp. olive oil, divided

tsp. kosher salt, divided –1 tsp. crushed red pepper flakes Few sprigs of fresh oregano

lb. frozen large peeled and deveined shrimp, thawed according to package directions Freshly ground black pepper

PREHEAT oven to 450°F. Toss potatoes, bell peppers, scallions, and lemon slices with cup oil, 1 teaspoon salt, red pepper flakes, and oregano sprigs on a rimmed baking sheet. Roast until potatoes are tender and peppers are blistered, 20 to 25 minutes.

shrimp with remaining 1 tablespoon oil and teaspoon salt, plus several grinds of black pepper. Arrange in a single layer on top of vegetables and return to oven. Roast until shrimp are opaque, about 5 minutes. TOSS

SERVE

with lemon wedges.

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

131

Giant Latke with Greens and Mushrooms

AC T I V E T I M E : 3 0 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E : 3 0 M I N U T E S S E RV E S : 4

8 oz. shiitake mushrooms 2 small yellow onions, 1 thinly sliced and 1 grated 6 Tbsp. vegetable oil, divided 2 tsp. kosher salt, divided Freshly ground black pepper 1 bunch mustard greens or kale, tough stems removed, leaves torn into bite-size pieces 1 tsp. white or red wine vinegar 1 lb. frozen hash browns, thawed cup all-purpose flour 2 large eggs cup sour cream oven to 450°F. Toss mushrooms and sliced onion with 2 tablespoons oil, teaspoon salt, and several grinds of pepper on a rimmed baking sheet. Roast, tossing halfway through, until vegetables are tender and golden, 10 to 12 minutes. Place greens on top of vegetables and return to oven. Roast, tossing halfway through, until greens have wilted, about 5 minutes. Remove from oven, add vinegar, and toss to combine. PREHEAT

132 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

MEANWHILE, combine hash browns, grated onion, flour, eggs, remaining 1 teaspoons salt, and several grinds of pepper in a large bowl and mix until evenly combined. HEAT 2 tablespoons oil in a large skillet (preferably cast-iron) over mediumhigh. Add potato mixture and press into an even layer all the way to the edge; cook, undisturbed, until bottom is golden brown, about 4 minutes; invert onto a plate.

remaining 2 tablespoons oil to skillet. Slide latke carefully back into skillet and cook until golden brown on bottom, about 4 minutes. Transfer to a rack. Serve latke, cut into wedges, topped with sour cream and mushroom mixture.

ADD

Blueberry Yo g u r t Cake

To m a t o Ta r t with Mustard Crème Fraîche AC T I V E T I M E : 10 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E : 5 0 M I N U T E S S E RV E S : 6

All-purpose flour, for work surface 1 8-oz. sheet all-butter puff pastry, thawed according to package directions cup sour cream or crème fraîche 1 Tbsp. grainy mustard 2 tsp. chopped fresh thyme, plus leaves for serving tsp. kosher salt, divided Freshly ground black pepper 1

lb. heirloom or beefsteak tomatoes, thinly sliced Flaky salt, for serving

AC T I V E T I M E : 1 5 M I N U T E S TOTA L T I M E : 1 H O U R , 3 0 M I N U T E S ( P LU S C O O L I N G ) M A K E S : 1 L OA F

Nonstick cooking spray cup plain whole-milk yogurt 3 large eggs 1 tsp. finely grated lemon zest (from 1 lemon) 1 tsp. vanilla extract 1 cup plus 1 Tbsp. sugar, divided 2 tsp. baking powder tsp. kosher salt 1

cups plus 1 Tbsp. all-purpose flour, divided cup vegetable oil 2 cups frozen blueberries

PREHEAT oven to 350°F. Lightly coat an 8 -by-4 inch loaf pan with nonstick spray; line with parchment and spray parchment.

yogurt, eggs, lemon zest, vanilla extract, and 1 cup sugar in a large bowl until smooth. Add baking powder, salt, and 1 cups flour and whisk to combine. Add oil and whisk until smooth (it will look broken at first and then come together).

WHISK

TOSS blueberries with remaining 1 tablespoon flour in a medium bowl until evenly coated; fold

blueberries into batter and quickly transfer to prepared loaf pan (working quickly ensures batter doesn’t turn purple). Sprinkle cake with remaining 1 tablespoon sugar. Bake until golden and a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean, 70 to 75 minutes. Let cool in pan for 20 minutes. Remove from pan and transfer to a rack to cool completely. STORE cake tightly wrapped at room temperature for 5 days or freeze for up to 1 month.

PREHEAT oven to 425°F. On a floured piece of parchment, roll puff pastry into a 10-by-12-inch rectangle; prick all over with a fork. Transfer parchment and pastry to a baking sheet.

sour cream, mustard, chopped thyme, teaspoon salt, and several grinds of pepper in a small bowl. Spread sour cream mixture evenly over pastry, leaving a -inch border. Top with tomatoes, overlapping slightly, and season with remaining teaspoon salt and several grinds of pepper. WHISK

BAKE until pastry is golden brown (peek underneath to check the bottom) and tomatoes look dry, 30 to 35 minutes. Let cool slightly before cutting into squares. Serve topped with thyme leaves and flaky salt.

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

133

WORK IT BREATHE NEW LIFE INTO YOUR DAY TIME LOOK WITH THESE ST YLISH TWISTS ON OFFICE STAPLES.

Fashion Editor REBECCA DALY

Photographs by THOMAS SLACK

Styled by STEFFI LEE

The

KNIT

Trendy tie sleeves and a funnel neck make this cozy sweater dressy enough for the office. Silvery, slimcut bottoms add even more polish. TO BUY Brochu Walker Muriel Funnel sweater, $398; brochuwalker.com. Halston Heritage Metallic trousers, $345; halston.com. A.V. Max Accessories Open Wire cuff, $45; avmaxnyc.com.

The

BLACK PANTS

Black pants may be an essential building block of a work wardrobe, but they need not be boring. Fresh features (like a detailed waistband) create interest without going offdress-code. TO BUY Banana Republic MockNeck top, $78, and Ryan-Fit Ribbon pants, $110; bananarepublic .com. Ann Taylor Floral earrings, $60; ann taylor.com. Alexis Bittar Large Liquid Metal Dome bangle, $245; alexisbittar.com.

The

WHITE SHIRT

The crisp white poplin is traditional; the updated silhouettes— peplums, tie waists, exaggerated sleeves—are anything but. TO BUY (Far left) Boohoo.com Ava Pleated blouse, $38; us.boohoo.com. Henri Bendel Orbital bracelet, $128; henri bendel.com. (Left) Karen Walker Gennaker top, $345; karen walker.com. Rebecca Taylor Metallic Leather skirt, $995; rebecca taylor.com. Kate Spade New York Golden Girl Bauble Drop earrings, $78; katespade.com.

The

SKIRT

Pair this skirt’s pretty pleats and understated lace with silk tops (or thin knits) for a feminine look that transitions seamlessly from desk to dinner. TO BUY L.K. Bennett Willow blouse, $265; us.lkbennett.com. Kobi Halperin Brooklyn skirt, $398; neiman marcus.com. Banana Republic Leather Block heels, $128; bananarepublic.com. Dinosaur Designs Stone ring, $180; dinosaurdesigns.com.

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

137

The

SUIT

Matching two-piece sets create a look that’s just as refined as—but more fashion-forward than—an expected jacket-and-pants combo (not to mention that they make short work of pulling together an outfit in the morning). TO BUY Lela Rose Linear Tulip Stretch Jacquard top, $795, and pants, $695; capitolcharlotte.com. Ann Taylor Stephania heels, $138; anntaylor .com. Fossil Gold earrings, $38; fossil.com. Lele Sadoughi Pinball ring, $115; lelesadoughi .com. A.V. Max Accessories Tapered cuff, $25; avmaxnyc.com.

The

BLAZER

S E T D E S I G N B Y D A N I E L L E S E L I G ; H A I R B Y N AT E R O S E N K R A N Z AT H O N E Y A R T I S T S ; M A K E U P B Y L I S E T G A R Z A AT T H E WA L L G R O U P ; M A N I C U R E B Y Y U K O WA D A AT AT E L I E R M A N A G E M E N T

This jacket’s subtle sheen, soft drape, and deep navy color up the ante on the classic staid blazer. And come Friday, it also looks great with jeans. TO BUY Karen Millen for 100% Bloomingdale’s Piped Satin blazer, $599; bloomingdales.com. Ann Taylor Ruffle Longsleeve top, $70; anntaylor.com. Ramy Brook Iris pants, $375; ramybrook.com. Laruicci Cosmo necklace, $195; laruicci .com. Arme De L’Amour Triple Sphere bracelet, $330; armedelamour.com.

Looking to build a wardrobe of basics for work and beyond? Download our handy checklist at realsimple.com/wardrobe.

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

139

give their lunchbox an italian accent. Inspired by Italian appetites. Loved by American kids. • Natural cheese • 80 calories • 7 grams of protein

T H E T I M E L E S S TA S T E O F I TA LY

S E P TE M B E R

OFFSET

Depending on where you live, you may be digging jackets out of closets or still eating summery ripe tomatoes. School either started a couple of weeks ago or is just beginning. Whatever the case, we’ve got the right dishes for you, from a tomato tart (page 133) to cozy stuffed onions (page 130). As for busy school nights? Find our editors’ favorite childhood suppers, re-created, starting on page 142.

CO OK WITH COZI Get Real Simple’s easy weeknight-dinner recipes in Cozi, a free meal-planning and organizing app from Time Inc. (available for iOS and Android).

Photograph by Maya Visnyei

141

FOOD

Easy Dinner 1

Crispy fried eggs with rosemary potatoes and bacon ACT I V E T I M E 2 5 M I N U T E S

TOTA L T I M E 3 5 M I N U T E S

SERVES 4

Gluten-Free Family Friendly

1 lb. baby Yukon Gold potatoes, halved or quartered if large 2 Tbsp. olive oil 1 tsp. kosher salt, divided 8 slices thick-cut bacon 8 large eggs 3 Tbsp. chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley 1 tsp. chopped fresh rosemary 1 clove garlic, grated tsp. black pepper 3 cups green seedless grapes PREHEAT oven to 425°F. Toss potatoes with oil and teaspoon salt on a rimmed baking sheet. Roast until golden and tender, 20 to 25 minutes.

FOOD ST YLING BY CHEL SE A ZIMMER; PROP ST YLING BY CL AIRE SPOLLEN

MEANWHILE, working in batches, cook bacon in a large skillet over medium until golden and crisp, 5 to 7 minutes. Transfer to a paper towel–lined plate.

in batches, crack eggs into bacon drippings and cook until whites are set and edges are crispy, 3 to 4 minutes.

WORKING

cooked potatoes with parsley, rosemary, garlic, remaining teaspoon salt, and pepper. Serve with bacon, eggs, and grapes.

TOS S

P E R S E RV I N G : 419 CALORIES, 20G FAT (5G SAT.), 382MG CHOL., 4G FIBER, 19G PRO., 42G CARB., 685MG SOD., 19G SUGAR

142 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

R e c i p e s b y Pa i g e G r a n d j e a n Photographs by Jennifer Causey

TONIGHT YOU’RE MAKING

CARPOOL SCHEDULES, PLAY DATES AND

BBQ

CHICKEN PIZZA

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FOOD

Easy Dinner 2

Veggie stromboli ACT I V E T I M E 2 0 M I N U T E S

TOTA L T I M E 5 0 M I N U T E S

SERVES 4

Freezable Vegetarian Family Friendly

1 Tbsp. olive oil 1 lb. cremini mushrooms, sliced 1 small yellow onion, chopped 1 tsp. kosher salt tsp. black pepper tsp. chopped fresh oregano 5 oz. baby spinach, roughly chopped 3 cloves garlic, chopped All-purpose flour, for work surface 1 lb. prepared pizza dough, at room temperature 1 15.5-oz. can diced tomatoes, drained 6 oz. mozzarella cheese, shredded (about 1 cups) 1 large egg, beaten PREHEAT oven to 425°F with rack in lowest position. Heat oil in a large skillet over medium-high. Add mushrooms, onion, salt, pepper, and oregano and cook, stirring, until vegetables are tender, 8 to 10 minutes. Add spinach and garlic and cook, stirring, until spinach has wilted, about 3 minutes. Transfer to a bowl and let cool slightly.

a lightly floured piece of parchment, roll dough into a 10-by-15-inch rectangle. Spoon mushroom mixture lengthwise down center of dough and top with tomatoes and cheese. Brush edges with egg and roll away from you into a log, pinching edges to seal. Place seam side down and transfer dough and parchment to a rimmed baking sheet. Brush with egg and cut 4 slits along the top. Bake on lowest rack until golden brown, 15 to 18 minutes. Let cool 15 minutes before slicing.

P E R S E RV I N G : 492 CALORIES, 20G FAT (8G SAT.), 84MG CHOL., 4G FIBER, 23G PRO., 63G CARB., 1,434MG SOD., 9G SUGAR

144 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

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FOOD

Easy Dinner 3

Sloppy joe biscuits with roasted Broccolini ACT I V E T I M E 2 0 M I N U T E S

TOTA L T I M E 4 0 M I N U T E S

SERVES 4

Family Friendly

1 16-oz. can refrigerated large biscuits 2 bunches Broccolini, ends trimmed 1 Tbsp. olive oil 1

tsp. kosher salt, divided tsp. black pepper, divided 1 lb. ground beef 1 medium yellow onion, chopped 1 small green bell pepper, chopped 2 cloves garlic, chopped 1 15-oz. can tomato sauce 2 Tbsp. light brown sugar 2 Tbsp. Worcestershire sauce

tsp. red wine vinegar 4 Tbsp. unsalted butter

BAKE biscuits according to package directions. ADJUST oven temperature to 425°F. Toss Broccolini with oil, teaspoon salt, and teaspoon pepper on a rimmed baking sheet. Roast until tender, 20 to 22 minutes. MEANWHILE, heat a large skillet over medium-high. Add beef, onion, bell pepper, garlic, and remaining teaspoon salt and teaspoon pepper; cook, stirring often, until beef is cooked through and vegetables are tender, 8 to 10 minutes. Reduce heat to mediumlow; stir in tomato sauce, sugar, and Worcestershire. Simmer, stirring, until slightly thickened, about 5 minutes. Stir in vinegar.

biscuits with butter, top with sloppy joe mixture, and serve with Broccolini.

SPREAD

P E R S E RV I N G : 819 CALORIES, 47G FAT (17G SAT.), 98MG CHOL., 7G FIBER, 32G PRO., 70G CARB., 2,363MG SOD., 24G SUGAR

146 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

Roasted Vegetables with Walnuts, Basil & Balsamic Vinaigrette

Pomegranate Glazed Carrots

FOR THE BEST SIMPLE VEGGIES EVER A SPRINKLE OF CRUNCHY CALIFORNIA WALNUTS ADDS FLAVOR, TEXTURE AND HEART-HEALTHY* GOODNESS TO ALL YOUR FAVORITE RECIPES. FOR THESE RECIPES AND MORE GO TO WALNUTS.ORG.

Per one ounce serving.

So Simple. So Good.™

Heart-Check food certification does not apply to recipes unless expressly stated. See heartcheckmark.org/guidelines.

Green Beans with Olives, Sun-Dried Tomatoes & Walnuts

walnuts.org

Sweet & Spicy Brussels Sprouts

*Supportive but not conclusive research shows that eating 1.5 ounces of walnuts per day, as part of a low saturated fat and low cholesterol diet and not resulting in increased caloric intake, may reduce the risk of coronary heart disease. (FDA) One ounce of walnuts provides 18g of total fat, 2.5g of monounsaturated fat, 13g of polyunsaturated fat including 2.5g of alpha-linolenic acid – the plant based omega-3.

FOOD

Easy Dinner 4

Slow-cooker chicken taco soup ACT I V E T I M E 10 M I N U T E S

TOTA L T I M E 8 H O U R S , 10 M I N U T E S

SERVES 8

Freezable Make Ahead Big Batch Slow Cooker One Pot Gluten-Free Family Friendly

6 cups low-sodium chicken broth 4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts (about 2 lb.) 2 15-oz. cans black beans, drained and rinsed 1 15-oz. can diced fire-roasted tomatoes 10 oz. frozen corn 1 red bell pepper, chopped 1 yellow onion, chopped 1 jalapeño, seeded and finely chopped, plus sliced for serving 2 Tbsp. ground cumin 2 Tbsp. chili powder 1 tsp. kosher salt tsp. black pepper 3 Tbsp. fresh lime juice (from 2 limes) Shredded cheese, sour cream, and hot sauce, for serving

DINNER MADE E ASY Get all the ingredients for this recipe, measured and prepped, delivered to your door with our partner FreshRealm. Go to freshrealm.co/rs26 and enter code RSREC17SEP for $35 off your first order of $70 or more, now through October 31, 2017.

148 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

COMBINE broth, chicken, beans, tomatoes, corn, bell pepper, onion, chopped jalapeño, cumin, chili powder, salt, and pepper in a 4- to 6-quart slow cooker. Cover and cook on low until chicken is very tender, 6 to 8 hours. Remove chicken and, using 2 forks, shred into bitesize pieces. Stir chicken and lime juice into soup and serve topped with cheese, sour cream, hot sauce, and sliced jalapeño. P E R S E RV I N G : 310 CALORIES, 4G FAT (1G SAT.), 83MG CHOL., 7G FIBER, 35G PRO., 32G CARB., 1,227MG SOD., 5G SUGAR

A VEGGIE BURGER T H A T ’ S

R E A L

FLAME CHANGER GRILL IT

Find us in the freezer aisle.

BELIEVE IT

Easy Dinner 5

Lox with cucumbertomato salad ACT I V E T I M E 1 5 M I N U T E S

TOTA L T I M E 1 5 M I N U T E S

SERVES 4

No-Cook Healthy Pick Family Friendly

2 Tbsp. olive oil 1 Tbsp. red wine vinegar 1

tsp. kosher salt tsp. black pepper 1 English cucumber, halved and thinly sliced 4 plum tomatoes, chopped small red onion, thinly sliced 4 Tbsp. unsalted butter, softened 1 Tbsp. chopped chives, plus more for serving 4 slices pumpernickel or rye bread, toasted 4 oz. sliced smoked salmon

together oil, vinegar, salt, and pepper in a large bowl. Add cucumber, tomatoes, and onion and toss to coat.

WHISK

STIR together butter and chives. Spread bread with chive butter and top with lox and more chives. Serve with cucumber salad. P E R S E RV I N G : 295 CALORIES, 21G FAT (9G SAT.), 37MG CHOL., 3G FIBER, 7G PRO., 19G CARB., 1,323MG SOD., 4G SUGAR

SEPTEMBER 2017 REAL SIMPLE

151

FOOD

R o a d Te s t

Noodles

BEST BE AN THRE AD

W E T W I R L E D O U R WAY T H RO U G H M O R E T H A N 5 0 VA R I E T I E S TO F I N D T H E B E ST B U Y S F O R SOUP S, STIR-FRIES, AND HOMEMADE R AMEN. By Grace Elkus

B E S T LO M E I N

Nasoya Chinese Style Noodles Tasters preferred the fresh pasta flavor of this refrigerated option. Try the noodles warm in stir-fries or chilled and tossed with sesame oil. TO BUY: $2.80 for 9 oz.; at grocery stores.

Dynasty Saifun Bean Threads Unlike the competition, these delicate noodles held their shape after cooking. Tuck them into spring rolls or fry them for a crunchy salad topping. TO BUY: $2.30 for 5.3 oz.; at grocery stores.

BEST R AMEN

Nona Lim Tokyo Ramen The buttery, wavy strands are strong enough to slurp—key when it comes to tackling brothy bowls of ramen. TO BUY: $5.50 for 10 oz.; at Whole Foods.

BEST RICE

BEST SOBA

Organic Planet Soba Noodles Soba made of buckwheat alone can taste muddy and bitter. Thanks to their blend of wheat and buckwheat flours, these are ideal for soba newbies. TO BUY: $3 for 8 oz.; at natural-food stores.

152 RE AL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

realsimple ROAD TE ST

Thai Kitchen Stir-Fry Rice Noodles Not too thick, not too thin, this gluten-free pick is perfect for family-friendly pad thai. TO BUY: $3 for 14 oz.; at grocery stores.

Photograph by Corey Olsen

PA C K A G E D P R O D U C T I M A G E S C O U R T E S Y O F M A N U F A C T U R E R S

BEST UD ON

Wel-Pac Japanese Udon Noodles These substantial wheat noodles easily absorb flavor, making them our favorite for saucy dishes. TO BUY: $2 for 10 oz.; at grocery stores.

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FOOD

Big Batch

Sweet potato and bean burritos with corn salsa TOTA L T I M E 5 0 M I N U T E S

M A K E S 8 B U R R I TO S

3 medium sweet potatoes, peeled and grated on large holes of a box grater cup olive oil tsp. chipotle chili powder 1

tsp. kosher salt, divided

tsp. black pepper, divided 2 plum tomatoes, seeded and chopped 1 small red onion, finely chopped 1 cup fresh or frozen corn kernels cup cilantro leaves and tender stems, chopped 1 Tbsp. fresh lime juice 2 15.5-oz. cans pinto or black beans, drained 8 oz. sharp white Cheddar cheese, grated (2 cups) 8 large burrito-size flour tortillas

oven to 375°F. Toss sweet potatoes with oil, chili teaspoon powder, and each salt and pepper. Spread out on 2 parchment-lined baking sheets. Roast, stirring halfway through, until most potatoes are browned at the tips, 35 to 40 minutes. Let cool completely. PREHEAT

MEANWHILE, combine tomatoes, onion, corn, cilantro, lime juice, and teaspoon each salt and pepper in a medium bowl. Set aside for 15 minutes. Strain, discarding any liquid that has accumulated.

beans with remaining teaspoon each salt and pepper. TOS S

DIVIDE beans, cheese, corn salsa, and sweet potatoes evenly among tortillas. Roll into burritos, wrap each separately in foil, and freeze in a single layer. Freeze for up to 3 months. To heat, remove foil, wrap each burrito in a paper towel, and microwave on high until heated through, 3 to 5 minutes. P E R S E RV I N G : 573 CALORIES, 23G FAT (9G SAT.), 10MG CHOL., 10G FIBER, 21G PRO., 74G CARB., 1,440MG SOD., 7G SUGAR

TIP

Parchment keeps the sweet potatoes from sticking to the baking sheet—don’t skip it.

154 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

Recipe by Heath Goldman Photograph by Jennifer Causey

FOOD ST YLING BY CHEL SE A ZIMMER; PROP ST YLING BY CL AIRE SPOLLEN

ACT I V E T I M E 2 0 M I N U T E S

our street cred is cobblestone. Insp y pp ites Loved by American kids. Galbani® cheese has been a part of Natural cheese Italy since 1882; in fact, it’s the #1 cheese brand in that country. Discover 80 calories our Grilled Crostini recipe and more galbanicheese.com. 7 atgrams of protein FRESH MOZZARELLA GRILLED CROSTINI

T H E T I M E L E S S TA S T E O F I TA LY

FOOD

Make It Yourself A D E L I C I O U S E SS E N T I A L T H AT’ S B E T T E R H O M E M A D E T H A N S T O R E - B O U G H T. W E ’ L L P R O V E I T. T H I S M O N T H : B I RT H D AY C A K E By D awn Perr y

A simple sheet cake eaten straight from the pan is one of life’s simplest sweet pleasures. Some people still dream of the corner rosette slice from birthdays gone by, but these days we prefer something just a little, well, less. You’ll ﬁnd nothing mysterious in this batter— butter, sugar, ﬂour, eggs—and nothing freaky in the frosting. Just an honest-to-goodness vanilla-scented base with a healthy smear of genuine chocolate ganache (which is just a fancy type of frosting). It’s cake in its purest form, and that’s something to celebrate.

156 RE AL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

Photographs by Jennifer Causey

ACTIVE TIME 30 MINUTES TOTA L T I M E 1 H O U R , 30 MINUTES SERVES 1 2 TO 16

CAKE cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, melted and cooled, plus more for baking pan cups all-purpose flour, 3 plus more for baking pan tsp. baking powder 2 tsp. kosher salt 1 tsp. baking soda 4 large eggs 2 cups sugar cup vegetable oil 1 Tbsp. pure vanilla extract cups whole milk 1 FROSTING 1

FOOD ST YLING BY CHEL SE A ZIMMER; PROP ST YLING BY CL AIRE SPOLLEN

cups semisweet chocolate chips cup milk chocolate chips cups heavy cream 1 tsp. kosher salt 2 tsp. pure vanilla extract

WITH mixer on low, add flour mixture in 3 additions and milk in 2 additions, beginning and ending with flour mixture. Mix just until combined (do not overmix). TRANSFER batter to prepared baking pan and bake until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean, 35 to 40 minutes. Let cool completely.

MAKE THE FROSTING: PL ACE both types of chocolate chips in a large bowl. Heat cream and salt in a medium saucepan over high. As soon as mixture begins to boil, pour over chocolate and let stand for 3 minutes. Add vanilla extract and whisk until melted and smooth. Let cool to room temperature, stirring occasionally.

an electric mixer, beat ganache until fluffy and a shade lighter, about 4 minutes. Spread evenly over cake.

USING

MAKE THE CAKE: oven to 350°F. Lightly butter a 9-by-13-inch baking pan and dust with flour, tapping out excess.

PREHEAT

together flour, baking powder, salt, and baking soda in a medium bowl; set aside.

WHISK

USING an electric mixer fitted with the whisk attachment, beat eggs and sugar on medium-high until pale and thick, about 4 minutes. With mixer running, add melted butter and oil and beat until evenly combined. Beat in vanilla extract.

Use it: Go to realsimple.com/ leftovercake for three ways to use extra slices.

ENJOY COOKING

THE FRENCH WAY

Take a cue from the French and create an inviting kitchen you’ll love to cook and spend time in.

Create ambiance and play to all of your s nses with sic, ﬂowers, d stylish objets.

An inviting table encourages you to sit back and enjoy even the simplest of meals.

Store fresh herbs and spices in glass jars on open shelves for easy recipe creation.

ENJOY AN EVERYDAY SIMPLE PLEASURE WITH NEW OUI™ BY YOPLAIT®—FRENCH STYLE YOGURT.

The Struggle Is Real

Toddler Interruptus B y R a q u e l D ’A p i c e

AT T E M P T # 1 Person Watching a Child: It’s so great to get to finally catch up! So talk to me about the stuff with Alex. Are you two still together? Friend with Relationship Issues: [Takes deep breath] It’s been rough. The other day, he— PWC: PUT THOSE BACK ON THE SHELF RIGHT NOW. NOW. ARE YOU LISTENING? IF YOU’RE LISTENING TO ME, LOOK AT MY EYES. AT MY EYES. BACK ON THE SHELF. LOOK AT ME. MY EYES. BACK ON THE SHELF. [To FRI] I’m so sorry. Bennett has this thing where he keeps biting the erasers off pencils. So—Alex?

AT T E M P T # 2 Person with Work Drama: So I’ve been with the company for six years, and I know my boss better than she knows herself. And yesterday her admin, who’s been with us for 2 months, goes— Person Watching a Child: WHY WOULD YOU LICK THAT, MADISON? THAT’S NOT EVEN OUR UMBRELLA!! [To PWD] I’m so sorry. So—her admin?

FRI: So, um, Alex and I are—we feel like we’re moving in different directions. And two nights ago, he didn’t come home until 2 a.m., and he’s obviously sort of drunk and immediately starts sobbing the words—

PWD: So her admin goes, “I think Cheryl would appreciate it if you focused a little more on your attention to detail.” I was so angry I basically left fingernail imprints on my desk from gripping it.

PWC: DO NOT PUT KINETIC SAND IN YOUR MOUTH!

PWC: [Silence] PWD: Hello? PWC: UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES DO I WANT TO SEE YOUR FINGERS TOUCH THAT WOMAN’S CROISSANT WHEN TWO SECONDS AGO I SAW THAT HAND DOWN THE BACK OF YOUR PANTS. [To PWD] I’m so sorry; I’m totally listening. Something with fingernails?

158 REAL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

AT T E M P T # 4

AT T E M P T # 3 Doctor: Luckily, there’s a cure. But you must, must, must take 10 milligrams of this twice a day every day without missing a dose, because— Person Watching a Child: IF I SEE YOU URINATE ON ANY OF THOSE MAGNETS, YOU ARE LOSING DESSERT PRIVILEGES. Doctor: I’m sorry—this is so important. Can you just repeat back to me how often I need you to take this medication? PWC: Medication? [Looks around] Wait, where am I? What am I doing in the doctor’s offi— WHOA, THAT’S IT, MISTER. DESSERT PRIVILEGES REVOKED.

Secret Agent: You’re our last hope, but I can only say this once. The coordinates for the rebel base are— Person Watching a Child: ARE YOU SERIOUSLY POURING SOMEONE’S ICED COFFEE DOWN THE FRONT OF YOUR PANTS ON THE ONE DAY I DIDN’T BRING YOU A CHANGE OF CLOTHES? [To man at other table] I will absolutely buy you another iced coffee. I am so sorry. SA: [Quietly leaves] Child: Who was that man? PWC: That’s such a great question, sweetie. I feel like I should know, but honestly, at this point I don’t even remember.

Illustration by Iker Ayestaran

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Rituals

Before my older son entered kindergarten, I planned a “date day” for just the two of us as a way to mark the milestone. He enjoyed it so much that we’ve continued to do it each year, and my younger son began asking for his own date day when he was starting kindergarten. I secretly plan the day with an activity they’d never ask for on their own, like going to an amusement park. Now, as they enter ﬁfth and second grades, it’s become something we all look forward to. —Crystal Trupia, Manassas, Virginia

162 RE AL SIMPLE SEPTEMBER 2017

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