The Monarch

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The onarch August 2012


Interview with Nina Murphy Her thoughts on the struggles facing the elderly today, and why you should join the Senior Companion Program.

Kingdom House is lucky to have a director as brilliant, experienced, and compassionate as Nina Murphy, Director of our Senior Companion Program, on staff. She speaks with the brisk efficiency of someone who cares too much to waste time. Her career path has been long and winding: “I’m a geriatric social worker by career, but a speech pathologist by degree.” Yet every step of the way she has learned invaluable skills that inform her work with the Seniors here at Kingdom House. Before asking Ms. Murphy for recent news about the Senior Companion Program, we discussed the combination of intellectual curiosity, dedication, compassion, and serendipity that brought her where she is today. This was a job that Ms. Murphy chose out of love for the cause, not necessity: “I had worked for the state for 22 years. In 2005, I was quasi-

“ A lot of the volunteers are seniors w

I’m going up the wall! I worked, I’m

retired. I did consulting. Then somebody approached me for this position. And I wasn’t really looking for a job at the time, but when I interviewed, I was like ‘oh, this might be something that I’d want to do!’ So I did it, and that’s how I ended up here. This is my second career.” Ms. Murphy admitted that she’s a senior herself (since the cut-off has been lowered to 55+). Of course, you would never know this by looking at her, or by witnessing her boundless energy. And perhaps this will be the legacy of the baby boomer generation: changing the definition of what it means to be a senior. Ms. Murphy received her undergraduate degree in speech pathology and then proceeded to become a licensed social worker. As a social worker, she was so deft and attentive to detail that she ended up teaching other social workers how to approach situations that they could not handle properly on their own. As the

many talented social workers at Kingdom House know, social work is a delicate art. It’s not just about knowing what is best for your clients. It’s also about understanding their emotions and appreciating how difficult it may be for them to make changes in their lives. It’s about letting them decide what changes they want to make. Ms. Murphy specialized in training for diversity and staff relationships — particularly in parts of the state that are relatively homogeneous, like Southeastern Missouri, where social workers often did not know how to address the needs of a family with a different ethnic background than their own: “We were getting clients who were offended and angry and not wanting anyone to come into the home -- all because of young social workers being inconsiderate. They were new and they were on fire and they were excited, and they didn’t realize that you have to have tact. You can be enthusiastic but you also need to be tactful when you go into someone else’s home -- it’s not your home.”


Rather than bluntly telling people what they can and can’t do — which can make them feel as if you are judging their lifestyle — it is better to address their problems in context of the whole situation and work out a solution that feels right to them. I asked Ms. Murphy what young people like myself could do to combat isolation and improve quality of life for seniors in our community. Of course, there are many ways that the millennial generation can help seniors, but the first step is plain and simple respect. This involves respect for the obstacles they’ve surmounted in their lifetimes and the decades of hard work they’ve toiled through to make retirement possible. For those who don’t understand what I’m getting at, Ms. Murphy puts it bluntly: “I’m always telling young people today: Get up and make your own money.” Ms. Murphy cited financial exploitation as one of the toughest challenges facing seniors in the United States today. The issue is extremely sensitive, because the most common culprits are not strangers, but rather family members and loved ones. We’re in the midst of a dismal job market, and many young people are struggling, but no matter how hard times become, we’ve got to stop seeing seniors as a financial resource.

experience and skills in the field, Ms. Murphy was eventually brought on to work with the Lieutenant Governor’s office, where she wrote policies and conducted grant analysis. She dealt with minority outreach in underserved communities, identifying populations and how to address them, while developing coalitions to help meet their needs. After hearing that she was an experienced policymaker with many years of government work under her belt, I just had to ask Ms. Murphy what she thought about the Healthcare Reform Bill, and how it would affect America’s seniors. Her response was glowing: “It’s a blessing for seniors. Especially those with pre-existing conditions. It was desperately needed, it really was, I don’t care what anybody says... I mean it’s got its kinks, but at least it’s better than nothing.” As she described, the healthcare reform bill is gradually filling the “donut hole” in prescription drug costs. The ‘donut hole’ is a flaw in the old Medicaid system, which had a large gap in healthcare coverage before “catastrophic coverage” kicked in. Healthcare companies can no longer charge seniors more for coverage up-front due to “pre-existing conditions” that plague many seniors, like diabetes. With the financial burden of medical bills lightening,

who are at home themselves saying m active, I want to do something.’ Much of the time, it’s not intentional, but people just don’t think about the consequences of accepting money from seniors over the age of sixty-five. Sometimes the seniors themselves may not be fully aware of how tight their money is — their savings are dwindling, and once they’re gone, that money is not replenishable. So while it is natural for seniors to be concerned about their loved ones, it is important to set limits. Ms. Murphy is constantly urging seniors to take care of themselves first and foremost, “I say, this isn’t an inheritance. You saved this for a rainy day, and you’re having a hard time, it’s raining! This is for you.” Nina Murphy has always kept a watchful eye out for seniors who have no one else to speak for them. For many years, she investigated elder abuse and neglect, consulting with various parties to help them handle emergency situations of that nature. Due to her unique

more senior citizens may be able to afford to keep their homes in the future. This way, more able-bodied senior citizens will be able to maintain the lifestyle they are accustomed to, rather than moving into nursing homes out of monetary necessity. The ability to maintain independence is very important to many seniors, and it is more than just a point of pride. Staying in the home is likely to allow them greater interaction with the multiple generations in their community. It allows for richer experiences and a better quality of life. Independent living for seniors is fast becoming a government priority. Says Ms. Murphy: “The Department of Health and Seniors Services is working towards helping people un-institutionalize themselves and get back out into the community.” Of course, some nursing homes and assisted living centers can be very rewarding, but it should never be the first


around since the late nineties. What makes the Senior Companion program unique is its symbiotic nature. “Community service” is the wrong word. Nobody is “serving” anyone, because it’s not a chore. Rather, the volunteers and the people they visit are making new friends, learning new activities, and adding some much-needed variety to their lives. As Ms. Murphy explained it: “A lot of the volunteers are seniors who are at home themselves saying ‘I’m going up the wall! I worked, I’m active, I want to do something. And so it’s a win-win situation. It’s a win for the senior that’s getting up off their butt and going out in the community, but it also helps that senior that’s homebound.”

Robin Mitchell, Senior Companions Field Coordinator resort. If the decision must be made to move to an institution, we must be sensitive to the emotional response of the loved one involved. Leaving the home suddenly can sometimes feel like leaving a whole life behind with you. As Ms. Murphy explained, “People have this mental block about facilities and institutions. They just don’t want to go. I think it’s because it reminds people of their own mortality.” The overwhelming majority of participants in the Senior Companion program live at home — and do perfectly fine by themselves, with just a little bit of help and company. Senior Companions are an integral piece of the puzzle that makes it easier for disabled or low-income elders to stay in their homes. The Senior Companion Program, which is actually a national organization and sister program of Americorps, is a wonderful example of senior citizens being granted the opportunity to help themselves. The Kingdom House chapter of the program has been

Interested in being a Senior Companion? If you’re over 55, have some free time on your hands, and want to make new friends, you’re a perfect candidate! The program currently boasts forty-seven dedicated volunteers, but we can always use more. It is a wonderful community to be a part of. I asked Ms. Murphy what kind of mindset she desires in a potential volunteer: “What we’re looking for in volunteers is a senior with a passion and a concern. Someone wanting to get into the community to help another senior.” Another word of advice: don’t get caught up in comparing your visits with the other Senior Companion’s visits. Each budding friendship is different, along with the visits that create them, and that’s the beauty of it. As Ms. Murphy explains: “Each volunteer has a unique experience. Just because you’re doing one thing doesn’t mean the next volunteer is doing the same thing. One senior may just be visiting other seniors in their senior building, and checking on them. There may be a senior that has a car that will go out in the community and spend four or five hours with another senior playing cards, reading, maybe taking them to a senior center activity, even just knitting or doing beadwork.”


Backpacks & BBQ A Back-to-School Extravaganza

The last weeks of summer before school starts are always an exciting scramble for students to savor the last few lazy days of summer while preparing themselves for a busy school year to come. This chance for a fresh start is always inexplicably linked to that wonderful feeling of sporting new shoes, getting fresh haircuts, and carrying

all these organizations decided to team up for an event of unprecedented scale. 1,360 children registered for the event, and approximately 450 families attended. A special thanks to our sponsors for their generous support: Nestle Purina, Manchester UMC (1500 shoes), Kirkwood UMC (900 backpacks), area salons (new haircuts).

Pre-K Graduation

The Blue Room is ready for kindergarten!

blank notebooks. In the past, three separate back-to-school events were held by Kingdom House, JVL South, Guardian Angel/Hosea House, St. Louis Housing Authority, and Mercy Neighborhood Services. This year for the first time,

This was the first year that all five partner agencies joined forces to put on the back-to-school event

Pre-K instructor Ms. Dianne Turner with the boys of the Blue Room (ages 4-5) all dressed up for the big day.

The young graduates showed off what they learned this year, reciting their name, address, and phone numbers.


Best of Kamp Kaleidoscope 2012



Christmas shop make a child’s holiday a little more magical.

give to the

We’re looking for

it’s not too early

to start shopping for the kids at Kingdom House!

bring new items to kingdom house

[1321 S. 11th St., STL, MO 63104] 9am - 5pm on weekdays,

or call us [314-421-0400] to arrange for a pickup.

contact

christmasshop@kingdomhouse.org with questions

brand new:

teen gifts mp3 players, movies, electronics, gift cards

bedding sets

sheets, blankets, pillows, and duvet covers

clothing

underwear, shoes, socks, coats, jeans, and outerwear

sporting goods

backpacks, helmets, bikes, scooters, equipment

toys


Christmas Wish-List What gifts will be popular in 2012

click on the links to shop online! child wish list

Lunch Boxes and Backpacks Roller Skates Scooters and Bicycles Spiderman Web Shooter and Mask The Dark Knight Rises Batmobile Spongebob “Squinkies”

teen wish list

Gift cards for (clothing stores, local salons, music stores) iPods/Mp3 players, headphones Jeans (Men’s and Women’s) Perfume/Cologne/Cosmetics/Lotion Young Adult Trilogies (The Hunger Games, Philip Pullman, The Hitchhiker’s Guide, The Giver)


ŠKingdom House 2012 www.kingdomhouse.org All Rights Reserved This book was set in Univers and Centaur Swash Capitals by the publisher and printed in the United States of America Laura Beckman is the Graphic Design Assistant at Kingdom House. For more information visit laurabeckman.com


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