REALCHURCHLADIES
sophia ruffin
living free
WWW.POINTGUARD2PROPHET.COM
GROWING UP, I ALWAYS KNEW THERE WAS SOMETHING DIFFERENT ABOUT ME. I couldn’t put my finger on it because I was too young to comprehend what I felt.
One of my teachers would say to me, “Sophia, you’re so pretty. Sophia, your hair is pretty. Sophia, you are such a good girl.” These words melted my heart. I found reasons to be in this teacher’s presence even if I had to act out to be around her. If my hair was messed up, she would take the time to fix it and remind me how beautiful I was. My stomach felt butterflies and my heart would beat fast. I wanted to feel her touch, hear her words, and sit in her presence. I struggled with rejection for years as a child. My mother attempted to abort me by taking Humphrey 11 pills, so the seed of rejection was planted early. I grew up attracted to older women who filled me up with their words of affirmation. At age 11, I was sexually abused by an older male.
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