Merging Rivers

Merging Rivers By: Les Jordan Jr.

Point Park and the Golden Triangle as seen from Mt. Washington.

The inclines are one of Pittsburgh’s tourist treasures.

Our lives area often characterized as rivers. Sometime the water flows soft and gentle like a warm, summer eve, while at other times the river is filled with raging flood waters that do great damage and leave our lives uncertain. Often, smaller rivers merge into a mighty river and become one of the great rivers of the world. This story is about rivers that merge; events that transform our lives and merge our spirit into a different person, one that is strong and fluid like a great river of the world.

One of the spiritual icons in my life are found in Pittsburgh, PA where the confluence of the Allegheny River and the Monongahela River merge to form the powerful Ohio River that winds its way through several states before flowing into the Gulf of Mexico south of New Orleans. The confluence of the “Three Rivers” is referred to by the local people in Pittsburgh as, “the Point.” A large fountain is constructed at the Point to commemorate the significance of the merging rivers and as an enhancement to Point Park that surrounds the area where the visible remains of historic Fort Pitt are located.

The fort was originally built as Fort Duquesne by the French starting in 1754. Attempts to take the fort in battle by British expeditionary forces led by Gen. Braddock met with miserable defeat and the death of Braddock in 1755, but a later expedition

by Gen. Forbes met with success when the French abandoned the fort and ordered it burnt in advance of the British approach.

The block house and partial ramparts of the British built fort remain and are part of a museum complex located in the park.

The exact location of the fort is marked by a paved walkway built to the dimensions of the original plan of the fort set into a large, grassy field bounded by skyscrapers in downtown Pittsburgh, an area known as the “Golden Triangle.”

Mount Washington is a neighborhood section of Pittsburgh where overlooks have been constructed to provide an inspiring

panoramic view of the entire city and its surrounding geography.

Additionally, two scenic inclines offer tourists and Mt. Washington residents a steep ride up the hillside on angled coaches that grip their way up and down the terrain on geared rails. It’s a breathtaking and memorable ride.

Not far from where the ride terminates at the top of the hill are the West End Overlooks and the location of a bronze statue of George Washington talking to a Native American as an tribute to the Indian’s assistance given to the British as they pushed forward to secure Fort Duquesne.

When I graduated from high school at 17 years of age in 1967, I knew very little about Fort Pitt and the British battle with the French for control of the fort. I left my hometown in September to arrive in Pittsburgh to begin school at a small technical school on Liberty and 9th Street in the Golden Triangle section of the city. My knowledge of Fort Pitt and Pittsburgh, however, soon increased dramatically.

I was housed in a small room on an upper floor of the WMCA on Grant Street in the Golden Triangle. I was all alone, a young man away from home in a strange place full of sounds that where confusing and unclear. I felt a sense of being lost and lonely. But, I also had great enthusiasm to explore my new environment and experience all of those confusing images that where everywhere.

In the evenings, after classes where done for the day, I walked the downtown streets and studied the buildings and storefront windows. I learned quickly how to navigate the autofilled intersections by waiting for the traffic lights to signal the all-clear for pedestrians. I walked everywhere and I studied everything, learning, growing, and changing.

My travels led me to the edge of the rivers starting first with the Monongahela on the southern side of the Golden triangle.

After I was familiar with that area, I then walked to the north side of the Triangle, down Penn Avenue and to Point Park where the Allegheny and Monongahela Rivers merge to form

The statue of George Washingtom talking to a Native American is located on Mt. Washington.

I studied the city lights from Mt. Washington on lonely evenings.

The Allegheny River merges with the Ohio River at the Point where the fountain is located.

The fountain is a spiritual landmark for me.

the mighty Ohio River. The “Point” became a treasured place for me, a place that soothed my confusion and, simultaneously, triggered my curiosity. It was a place of meditation and discovery. It was a place that put my confused spirit to rest.

I walked to Point Park often in the warm September evenings that first year away from home and sat on one of the many benches that lined the Allegheny River. A canopy of trees lined the walkways where the benches were carefully located and I watched countless couples walk along the cobblestone walkway as they held hands, sometimes pausing to kiss, or talk, or to silently gaze absent mindedly across the river as they experienced the joy of their relationships with each other.

I, also, looked across the river. Unlike the lovers strolling along the river-front, I was deeply engrossed in thought as I gathered in all the sensations from mixed lights and sounds emanating from the city’s North Shore shimmering across the water. The giant red sign at the Clark Candy Bar Company dominated the immediate forefront of the view, as did many abandoned factories that were slowly being dismantled as part of Pittsburgh’s aggressive redevelopment program.

Occasionally, the lights shimmering off the calm surface of the water would be broken by waves provoked by passing recreational boats or giant barges moving slowly up the river to the steel mills miles at New Kensington and Freeport several miles away.

The scattered reflections of the city lights across the water were symbols of my scattered feelings, a strange mixture of the sadness I felt from leaving my hometown balanced by the liberation that I felt from finally being free from the tensions produced by an abusive parent. With each visit to the park, the sense of freedom grew dominant and my need to explore the city increased. The sounds of the “Three Rivers” merging where touching my soul, speaking a unknown language to me that I wouldn’t understand until my own Rivers Merged over twenty years in the future.

Point Park is a beautiful place, one of Pittsburgh’s early successes at urban renewal. A wide area of grass surrounded by trees sits between the city skyscrapers and the Point. A beautiful fountain is now located at the exact confluence of the Three Rivers that commemorates their historical significance, and the location of an important Revolutionary War fort that played a dominant role in the formation of American as a dominant British culture.

When the fountain sends it jets of water high into the Pittsburg sky and the wind is blowing gently across the rivers, one can feel a refreshing spray of water touch them. To me, the spray symbolizes the feelings that I had of being free, a spiritual “Point” in my life that was every bit as important as the commemoration of the spot where three rivers merged.

As I became more confident with roaming the big city, I extended my tours to the Mt. Washington area high above the city.

While I walked up the steep P. J. McArdle Roadway to Grandview Ave. at the top of the hill where all the panoramic views of the city are located most of the time, I occasionally took the trolley up the hill and enjoyed the gentle sway of the coach as it carefully followed the twin rails built into the cobblestone street that led to Mt. Washington. It was a soothing ride, one that is now only history since the trolleys are long gone.

Three overlooks of the city are located on Grandview Ave and the two inclines that begin on the river’s edges climb the steep hill and exit on Grandview Ave. The inclines are a great tourist attraction and offer local residents a convenient way to travel down the hill into the Golden Triangle to shop, dine, or experience some of the plentiful entertainment events at the theaters in the downtown area. The terminals for the incline also provide a museum of interesting history of the incline while giving a spectacular and popular view of the city and its history. The inclines are truly one of Pittsburgh’s great historical treasures.

I took my first outing to Mt. Washington early in the autumn when the air was still warm and humid with a light fog

The lights of the city from Mt. Washington captivated me as I studied them for hours on lonely nights shortly after arrival in the Steel City.

The gutteral chug of the big engines of the coal barges pushing up river appealed to my lonely feelings when I first arrived in Pttsburgh after high school.

My daughter at Beth at Kennywood Park in 1974.

My daughter at Beth at Kennywood Park in 1974.

hanging in the air. I felt exhilarated as I stood leaning over the railing of the overlook in order to gain a clear perspective of the city below. It is easy to understand why the street that the overlooks are built on is named “Grandview Ave.” I looked out across the city, first studying the patterns of street lights and learned how they navigate the contours of the rivers and hills that define the boundaries of the city. The point where the rivers merge dominates the flow of the town, a “Point” from which all else seems to radiate. Just as the three rivers merge at that point, all the streets of the city follow suite in a natural flow that geology decided millions of years ago.

I returned to the overlooks many times while I stayed in the WMCA. When I was on Mt. Washington, I loved to listen to the lonesome sounds of the fog horns on the countless coal barges that fought their way up the rivers to deliver their payloads to the scores of steel mills along the rivers that gave the “Steel City” its nickname. The slow, guttural chug of the barges powerful engines seem to harmonize with my own “chug of life” as I adapted to my new environment. I, too, was forging slowly up the river; the river of life.

The merging rivers captivated me. I studied their ebb and flow as though I was a part of them. Each street light that twinkled in the twilight sent a gleaming message of brightness to me.

The inspiration carried forward and set a life-long spiritual path that returned my memory to those sacred spots repeatedly.

In the following spring I moved to the new dorm for the school out in the East Liberty section of the city. It was nice and there was some grass out back to sit and ponder. The new dorm was a convenient place to make the complicated trip out to Kennywood Park, a favorite amusement park in Western Pennsylvania. A few years later i took my first born dughter, beth, to the fun park. it was wonderful to have my daughter with me at a place that was important to me during my post-high school years.

I became acclimated to city life while in East Liberty , but

still longed to return to my endless hills at home on the weekends. My home in East Liberty was short lived and the school moved us to a new dorm above the War Surplus Store downtown on Liberty Ave. only one block away from my 9th Street school. By then, I belonged to a fraternity and became friends with many of my fellow students.

We made countless trips to the large lawn of bright, green grass that permeated the center of Point Park. They were beautiful days in the “Hippy” era, days that were filled with freedom and fun; times that created treasured memories of carefree youthfulness.

Soon after that I met a girl at a fraternity party that became my wife several months later. We dated in the park. We held hands as we slowing walked across the cobblestones, stopping occasionally to caress or kiss, and I was reminded of countless others I watched in loneliness and curiosity after I first arrived in the city. We sat snuggled together on the benches, sometimes in total silence, while at other times our chatter was endless, as was our kisses. She was my first real girlfriend. Point Park became further ingrained in my spirit as a place of wonder, of merging, and of freedom, yet, I didn’t understand the sensations at a spiritual level. That only became a reality 17 years later when our marriage ended in bitter upheaval because of her abuse.

She and I left Pittsburgh in the late summer of 1969 and a marriage in my hometown soon followed. My first born daughter, Beth, arrived in 1971 and when she was three years old, I took her to Mt. Washington for the first time to see the panorama, and to see the wonders that her dad had experienced in 1967. She was delighted. The glow on her face was as bright as the lights that her dad absorbed on those twilight autumn pilgrimages to Mt. Washington several years earlier.

When I first arrived at Point Park, the Clark sign was bright and ubiquitous. By the time I brought Beth there to visit, the sign and the factory that made the popular candy bar were history and Three Rivers Stadium stood proudly in its place on the

Beth and I on Mt. Washington in 1974.

Beth and her mom on Mt. Washington in 1974.

Firework photos that I took from Mt. Washington in 1974 were similar to this photo.

The fountain glows magnificently at night.

“North Shore,” as it is now called.

I took photographs high above the stadium during the 4th of July fireworks that year from Mt. Washington. The photos are now lost, but the memory is still vividly etched into my spirit.

Beth loved the experience. More rivers were merging. The Point became even more of a spiritual destination, a point of joy, love and freedom, and most importantly, a place of bonding with my children.

About that time a newly constructed fountain built at the Point began operation, its spout of water blasting high into the air. Beth loved that, too, as did my wife, and it became a special sign to me, the sign of a merging family at a point in time never suspected when I sat lonely in the park on dark nights in 1967.

The Point was also the embarking spot to ride one of the ships of the Gateway Clipper Fleet. My wife and I rode the party liner several evenings during warm summer eves and enjoyed the sites of the mighty city reflecting off of the equally mighty Ohio River.

We took Beth for a ride across the rivers on the children’s ship, the “Good Ship Lollypop,” A small boat that was part of the fleet that included paddle wheel ships like those that permeated the river long before automobile traffic. Beth loved the experiences, and would often pester us to return for another outing.

Before long, my life course deviated from “those magic moments” at the point, the overlooks, and the river. By 1985, increased amounts of violent abuse from my wife toward the kids and I, necessitated a termination of the marriage and a desperate attempt to save the kids from further abusive damage.

It was too late for Beth. Her damage was irreparable. But, there was still hope for Jimmy and Ginny. But, fighting against a corrupt legal system in a small, rural community proved futile and depressing. My pain of watching the system allow my children to be destroyed nearly destroyed me.

Finally, after a hopeless fight to free my children, I was

forced to concede, regroup, and find a new coping strategy. But, before that moment gleamed into reality, I slipped into a terrible depression filled with anger and a sense of betrayal from a corrupt system. Hopelessness destroyed my spirit and I grew desperate and finally knelt down with sobbing tears for God to save my children. I “turned it over to God,” as they say in the 12 Step Recovery programs. In doing so, I learned about a different God than what the Fundamentalist shout about. I found a loving, friendly God, not an angry punishing God. I realized that God was within me. What an important revelation in my life, a revelation that would change my life course significantly.

Slowly, ever so slowly, I moved upward from my grief and into a new spiritual beginning that brought the light back into my life once again. I had brief, glimmering moments of that light at rare occasions over the years that I didn’t fully comprehend or accept. But, this new light was much different. It was brighter, golden bright and it never flickered. It was my “Rebirth.” I was a new person. When I turned my problem over to God, I actually found my true self. I learned to cry in pain. I learned to hope again. I learned to love myself. I was changed.

I realized many spiritual concepts that had remained hidden in my life. The most important insight was the concept that, “I Am.” The words meant that I Am a Person, I Am Real and that I value and Love Myself. It was what Christ repeatedly answered when questioned by His disciples about him possibly being The Savior. He simply replied, “I AM.” With my awareness of a new and important Self, I understood the mystery of what Christ was trying to illustrate. Be real. Be YOURSELF-not your ego self, your spiritual self. The spiritual self is filled with hope and self-confidence. The spiritual self has a sense of humor, a light, lofty feeling that enlivens and empowers. The spiritual self is filled with love and forgiveness, as well as compassion, empathy and tolerance. The spiritual self, remarkably, is open to insight and revelation.

Soon after the images impressed in my mind’s eye from my

One of the paddle wheel boats operated by the Gateway Clipper Fleet.

The revelation of finding our real self is a beautiful as this sunburst over the Gulf in Florida.

My son, Jim, and I in front of Three River Stadium as the paddle wheel ship, “Allegheny” passes in the background.

I saw this view of Smethport while sitting in the grass while taking photos for the Timelss Home book in 2003.

bygone days at the Point in Pittsburgh became the present day spiritual insight that my rivers had merged. Those places, those experiences, those treasured moments were a symbol of my spirit merging, of feeling free once more. I felt love again. I felt wonder again. I truly allowed myself to feel for the first time. I felt my own presence as a beautiful and loving human being as the miracle of transformation occurred.

A few years later I took my son to Point Park and took several photos of him while there. He loves the Pittsburgh Steelers, so I took a photo of him and I together in front of Three Rivers Stadium from across the Allegheny river just as the paddle wheel ship, the Allegheny, passed by in the background. More rivers were merging.

Two years later Jim graduated and moved to Florida and I was all alone and chugged slowly up the river once more wondering where my next destination would lead me. I received my answer three years later.

My hometown celebrated it Sesquicentennial in 2003 and I was one of five authors that created a special book, Timeless Home, for the occasion. I wrote several of the chapters, produced most of the paragraph transitions in the other chapters, and provided nearly all of the modern photos of the town.

I solely created, edited, and illustrated a sequel to the first book about all the activities during the week-long celebration.

I went to my special hillside pasture on the side of the hill to do photos for the cover of the Timeless Home book. While sitting on the green, soft April grass in the clearing overlooking town, an insight announced to me that my destiny had always been to promote my hometown.

As we added the few last chapters to the book, I learned that a similar destiny existed with one of Smethport’s earliest pioneers who sat in the same spot as I did, only a hundred and fifty years earlier, and wrote about the beauty of the valley where Smethport was located and growing as the McKean County seat.

I was greatly moved by this synchronization with an early pioneer. Inspiration flowed like light beams through an opening in a dark, clouded sky.

In 2007 I reconnected with a classmate while attending my 40th class reunion. When in high school, I used to walk home with her after school and listen to her pour her family problems out from a difficult home-life. I understood her pain as I experienced the same issues as she did. I had a secret crush on her, but was too shy to know how to announce my feelings.

At the reunion, we quickly became a couple and I took her to those special places in Pittsburgh that inspired me, a spiritual retreat to commemorate our “merging,” and to share the spiritual moments for me that changed my life years earlier. But, even more profoundly, the pilgrimage was to commemorate and gives thanks for my life merging once again.

I took several photos of we two together on Mt. Washington and at the Point with the fountain as a backdrop. We also experienced the Three Rivers Art Festival, a favorite activity of mine that I enjoyed during my earlier days in Pittsburgh.

Two of my special friends, a married couple, went with us and I felt a special moment had unfolded in my life. Unfortunately, the significance was not experienced in the same way by my friends or with my mate.

They are no longer a part of my life. Two year later, my mate attempted an affair with one of those friends, which caused me terrible hurt and a sense of painful betrayal, and played a role in the ending of the relationships.

But, before that moment came, we moved to Florida in the late spring of 2011. It was a horrible mistake. I missed my mountains and the people of my small town. I especially missed the freedom that is provided in living in an open, rural area that provides plenty of space to move through free of congestion, traffic, and resistant people.

I felt great stress and immediately realized that I had made a big mistake and had removed myself from my destiny. The

I took my fiancee to Mt. Washington to share with her the significance of the Merging Rivers of my spirit.

The fountain at the point was like a flow of inspiration that never ends to me.

While I waited out the stress before returning home, I spent much creative times photgraphing inspiring scenes in Florida.

An unusual combination photo of lightning in a bright sunset.

stress amplified the relationship tensions with my mate as I pulled in and I hung-on emotionally and spiritually until I could return home in April of 2012.

I spent countless hours doing photos of the beautiful Florida sunsets, thrilling lightning storms across the gulk, and of the boats in the marinas that were everywhere as a spiritual way to cope with my stree until I could return home.

Late in August my fiancée visited her daughter in Spain to aid her with the arrival of her first child. A few days after she left, I went to a church service at the Unity Church in Dunedin where we were living in a condominium. As the service ended, I saw in the corner of my eye I saw a person approaching me and turned to see a pretty woman with long natural blond hair tied in a pony-tail. She reached her hand out and said her name. as she held out her hand. I touched her outstretched hand and in an instant, we were connected. I knew that she was special. We talked and it was a bouquet of spiritual fragrances.

As I pondered the meeting, I was haunted by my fiancée’s absence. I wished that she would have been part of the mystical exchange that I experienced; I wondered why the connection happened in her absence.

My friend and I met regularly at the charming Carolyn’s café in Dunedin. I purposely include my fiancée in the meetings as I hoped that my friend’s spirituality would help her. But, my fiancée never seemed to fit in. She just didn’t understand a spiritual existence.

My Unity friend connected more deeply with each talk and continued to meet regularly to chat and explore our spiritual lives. It was a wonderful spiritual and emotional experience.

Simultaneous to those meetings, I began having insights that I had a new life coming, a life that I had always wanted. The details of the new life were vague, just that it was coming. I shared the insights with my dear friend, who understood. I also shared them with my fiancée who seemed bothered by my insights.

The relationship with my fiancée continued to struggle as the

last day of April approached and we were scheduled to start the long drive home to Smethport.

On the trip home, she informed me that she was “leaving me because I had health problems that were holding her back and because she wanted to have sex.”

I stood up at the table in the Cranberry Township mall where we had stopped for dinner, turned, walked away and never looked back.

I was hurt deeply, but was determined to move forward in my life. I struggled to recover from the shock and was challenged by life threatening health issues spawned by the stress. I dug into my spirit for assistance and reached out to my friends, especially my dear friend from Unity Church.

After recovering from the health threats, the new life I had received insightfully in Florida slowly began to emerge. The first sign was the fortune of finding an apartment to live in, something difficult to find in Smethport. The apartment, more remarkably, was in my grandmother’s old house where I basically grew up. My grandparents’ were a key source of my salvation.

They were a sanctuary from the abuse I felt from my dad. They validated me and treated me as though I was worth something.

Arriving back home from Florida to live in the house where I was nurtured was a spiritual symbol that “I was home.”

Yet, the termination of my relationship with my fiancée still hurt and I dug even deeper into my spirit to recover. I persevered, prayed, and “gave it to God” once more. I gave forgiveness.

My recovery was in full motion. Forgiveness is the greatest healing medicine that ever existed.

Before long, the “rivers were merging” once more.

Good spiritual friends merged ever increasingly into the flow of my life. Soon, I recognized that my mate had done me a favor by removing her negative persona from my life, and I gave God thanks for the gift, even though it hurt.

In August, after a stay in the Olean Hospital, I published a Facebook site titled, Discover Smethport. A few years earlier

Although there was a darkness and emotional pain in my life, there was always a bright light to see on the horizon.

This rainbow coincided with insights that I had of how my freind from the Unity Church in Florida was a rainbow in my life.

while my fiancée was on my Tourism Promotion Committee of the Smethport Heritage Counsel, I originated the marketing concept of Discover Smethport. Other tourism promotion titles used “visit” to induce tourism interest. I wanted an idea that was more intriguing, something that captured the imagination and the concept, “discover,” had just the right ring to it.

I started to publish a Facebook site shortly after the concept was developed, but never followed through until the inspiration emerged clearly that August of 2012. That action proved to be one of the most important, life-changing moments in my life.

The “real me” began to emerge ever more clearly to everyone that followed the page, and especially with my friends. My dear friends in Florida noted how my light within showed clearly through my photography. My spirit was beginning to come out of hiding, just as I was. I was opening. Miracles were happening!

The light was shining!

The responses from people helped inspire my recovery from the emotional turmoil that follows a relationship split. I gathered inspiration, self-realization and healed ever more swiftly. A transformation was occurring; the “New Life” predicted in Florida was emerging, flowing, producing a different, unique person.

Rivers were once again merging.

My dear friend in Florida became an increasingly loved and special person in my life. I realized as I shared my recovery, my feelings, and my spiritual insights with her, that she was a bright, yellow light of strength for me. She was a beautiful, beautiful rainbow, one that I felt inside and simultaneously saw in the re al sky as I understood the insight. I took a photo of the rainbow and shared the photo and the revelation with her. I wrote her special words of sharing with each remarkable event, of how each was a treasured moment of feeling and light within me.

I slowly began to understand why my fiancée was absent when my friend and I met at Unity while she was in Spain. My friend was not sent for her. My friend was sent for me, and I was

no longer haunted by the question that I had asked myself a few months earlier when we first met at Unity while my fiancée was absent.

As we talked about my new life and the relationship with my fiancée, my friend admitted that she never quite took to my fiancée. I was not surprised, and a bit amused.

She was the first to realize that we were soul-mates and she grew even dearer to me as my recovery gathered momentum.

She also was enduring the termination of her relationship with an abusive husband and we sent much love and spiritual strength and inspiration to each other. Our mystical connection was carved into stone. It was a beautiful, sacred feeling.

After several months, communication with her slowed. I intuitively knew that she was in the dark, depths of recovery. I sent her reassurance and validation, love, and most of all, compassion, during those dark weeks.

While my friend was in the darkness and I missed my contact with her so badly, other spiritual sources inspired me. They came out of nowhere, like they often do.

In the spring of 2013 I began noticing some very lovely comments left by a lady on Discover Smethport. Her comments were poetically beautiful and captured the spiritual essence of the photos that inspired her. Her words, in turn, inspired me.

As summer arrived, we met coincidently and became friends on a night of karaoke at one of our town’s special summer activities. Unfortunately, the karaoke machine malfunctioned and she wasn’t able to sing that night. But, I listened to her several times at local venues and was impressed by her artistry.

As our friendship grew, we talked about many things and I recalled being impressed with her singing when I heard her the previous winter before we met. She was impressed with my photography and told me of how a recently posted photo of sunlight immerging on a foggy morning at Hamlin Lake inspired her to start writing poetry again. She wrote a tender poem about her awakening and I applied it graphically to the photo. I felt hon-

Many beautiful sunsets every bit as gorgeous as those in Florida repeated all summer, bringing me much inspiraition and peace.

This sunset greatly inspired my poet friend.

My singing friend wrote this poem in response to this photo inspiring herto write again.

The poem is about be united with yourself and the unity that a person feels within.

ored and inspired.

Vivid, colorful sunsets where plentiful throughout that summer, and she wrote some uplifting comments about them on Discover Smethport. I brought her to the lake one evening so that she could experience the mystical events in person, rather than through the internet. We were blessed that evening. An awesome sunset produced a dramatic sky and my friend’s face glowed like the sunset. Later, she wrote a poem to commemorate her spiritual experience that evening and it was just as beautiful as the colorful sky that enveloped us.

The inspiration that I received from the experience propelled my spirit forward and I knew that I had done the exact right thing for me when I published the Facebook site the summer before.

Months later, as 2014 arrived and the coldest winter in 35 years sent temperatures plummeting on endless days, the darkness from my friend’s silence ended when I received a call from her and she told me that she had experienced a rebirth in her life. She finally felt free from the emotional hurt that she had suffered from an abusive marriage and other difficulties in life.

I was electrified with joy and love to hear her voice and learn of her awakening. I peacefully shed gentle tears of joy. My own life, as well, was being transformed through her miracle of rebirth that was unfolding, touching both our spirits with golden energy. I felt a sense of joy and love that was never imagined before those moments. I learned a concept of love that was free, a concept that asked nothing, labeled nothing, but just existed and was felt and accepted. It was a form of “unconditional love” that I intellectually knew existed but was only feeling in reality for the first time. What a beautiful miracle of transformation. It is not impossible to justly describe the feeling and the spiritual knowledge that exists deep within from that shining transformation.

I sent her all my thoughts and feelings and descriptions of the transformation, and how that “new life” was being defined

My friend with the beautiful singing voice put poetry to my photos. I was honored.

‘Reflections’ was one of the poems that wrote of the importance of reflecting on the beautiful things in our lives.

as something “real.” I thought back to my little rock with “Free” written on it.

I commemorated her rebirth when I asked a photographer friend that lived near her in Florida to send a little white Jerusalem rock to her so that she could write her “new name” on it just as I had when still in Florida.

She soon replied that she was deeply touched with love and gratitude. She thanked me with deep love for being there for her through the darkness and her pain. It was a precious moment for us both. Miracles of love are always the most precious.

My other friend that helped me send the rock was, herself, experiencing a small revelation in her life. She understood within herself that she was a beautiful person, something that a family tie had prevented her from realizing. She, too, was becoming free. That was, also, a miracle.

She had just received the white rock, herself, at a Unity service in Florida. The flow of spirit was touching us all. I was thankful that people I loved were being touched with a new life of being “Free!” I was amazed at the transformation and how it flowed around me and through my friends. I prayed for that to happen for many years. It was Amazing!

When I was still in Florida, we went on a few photo outings together and I knew that she was gentle, wonderful person.

I knew that because she loves taking photos of beautiful natural things like flowers and birds. Only gentle people like those things.

I helped her to have the courage to break free of a destructive relationship with a sibling. Our friendship grew and we helped each other continue forward with our mystical lives.

About that time I became aware that I was opening more as a person; more than I ever had. I first began the liberating process of opening with my rebirth in 1988. But, after my return from Florida, the process speeded up dramatically. My quietness that began when I was small child and was forced to be still because of my father’s temperament. Additional abuses drove me My Florida photographer friend’s photos reflect her own inner beauty.

deeper into a quiet darkness, especially pronounced as a teen in high school. By the time I was in my early adulthood and married to an abusive alchoholic, I became determined to overcome my timidity. I forged ahead and learned to write to express myself, and later to talk publically.

Oddly, in the early autumn after my return from Florida, I finally told my dad how I truly felt; that I was tired of his abuse, and I threw him out of my house and set myself free in the process. Yes, I became “Free!” What a miracle.

Yet, those steps where just a beginning. The opening of me that occurred after my return to Smethport and my liberation from my father’s abuse and suppression became more dramatic, more complete. It was a miracle.

Many other miracles collected in my life. They were new insights, new friendships, and new realizations about who I was and what my destiny in life was. I understood ever more clearly how my creativity was connected to my spirit and had been the root source of my new beginnings from the past and present.

I shared each new stage of understanding with many friends, especially my beloved friend from the little Unity Church. Our spiritual growth that we shared with each other gave strength to our journey through life. My transformation continued. The new me that was emerging was a more open person, one not so reserved on sharing my inner self. I finally realized my creative self and delighted in a healing dose of self-confidence, and selfrealization. It was a state of being that I remotely wished for when I was a child afraid of many things that were the result of the horrors and abuse that I saw and received. Freedom rang out in ever increasing amounts, and I shouted out in my spirit, “Let the Bells Ring!”

It was about then that my photographer friend explained how she had found a new beginning and was realizing a new side of herself. I validated her feelings and her direction and helped her accept that her new path was right, even though she had separated from the contentious relationship with her sibling.

Although there were dark clouds in my life when I returned from Florida, I knew that sunbeams and insights would soon return.

My young photgrapher friend has created many awesome images.

This one speaks of her own rootedness as solid as an old tree.

My friendship with her grew and matured and we shared more experiences in our lives more openly with each communication. It was a wonderful present to see my friend find a spiritual balance in her life, and I was humbled that I helped counsel her toward moving on in life and finding herself, her destiny, and her niche in life. I was blessed that I was an inspiration to her, just as her nature photography was to me.

A few weeks before that, I walked into a local restaurant/ bar, looked at a pretty young lady approaching me to wait on me, and knew intuitively in an instant that she was a very special person, a person worthy of knowing. I introduced myself, something that was not characteristic of me in the past, but was becoming an element of the new me that was emerging ever more rapidly. The, “I Am,” in me was growing stronger every day. It was a moment in my life that was a miracle. I felt open, free, assured that I had the right to introduce myself. It was natural. I followed what I heard in my spirit, that soft quiet voice that holds the truth. I have heard that voice before as I met new people and was guided to make friendships with them. But, this voice was different. It was crystal clear, perfectly natural, and it was totally nonthreatening. I am glad that I listened.

The young lady was a budding photographer and as soon as she learned that I was a photographer, she asked me to mentor her. Remarkably, I agreed. I purposely avoided being in that position in the past and I’m not even sure why. Perhaps, it was because of influences that I was not even aware of. Perhaps, it was because of how the abuse that I received all my life had me mistakenly convinced that I was not worthy of mentoring to anyone. Whatever the reason was, I had changed since returning from Florida and since I began to have emerging confidence in my creative abilities and as a person.

I thrived on teaching her photography and was delighted by her natural, creative abilities and artistry. Her work inspired me.

The student taught the teacher. I loved it.

A delightful friendship grew quickly and we soon were

talking about the emotional and spiritual growth that we both have experienced in our lives. For a young lady, she had great depth and wisdom from the events in her life that motivated her to grow. I complimented her and told her that she was “amazing.” In addition to that, she had a positive, refreshing personality in a world of negativity and hopelessness that proliferates the American culture. I remarked that she was like a spring breeze; refreshing!

I intuitively knew that she was changing, growing, maturing. Soon, miracles unfolded with her that was mystical and unique. A new person was emerging and that new person was very special.

Shortly after we met, I shared the spiritual significance of the Three Pittsburgh Rivers in my life as an iconic reference point of my merging together as a person. Her eyes grew bright and she noted how she, also, had a special point of reference in her life that was tied to the Point where the three rivers meet in Pittsburgh. I was greatly inspired by the synchronization in our lives and knew intuitively that something very special was happening.

She told me that she had photos of her visit there as a young teen, but was not able to find them. Remarkably, a few weeks later, she showed me the photos and I was profoundly inspired. It was as though we both experienced something alike, something from our life, something exactly the same, but, a generation a part. But, that was only in real time. In spiritual time, there was no distance from a generation, only the synchronization of a similar spiritual experience. I was filled with light.

I was greatly inspired and my spirit was motivated to write a story about the miracles that were evident. I asked if I could use the photos for a story I wanted to write about the “Merging Rivers” in our lives, and she eagerly granted permission. I knew deep in my spirit that the story had to be written.

Not long after I borrowed the photos, I received a

My friends photographic skills are amazing. This photo is as refreshing as I see her as a person.

One of my young friend’s photo from her stay in Pittsburgh in the mid-90s shows the terminal of one of the inclines at Mt. Washington.

My young friend at about 13 years old.

deeply moving email from my young friend. I was touched with tears of joy. She had completed a transformation as a person, a profound spiritual awakening that lifted her sense of self high into the cosmos. I was moved more deeply than I can ever remember. My intuition must have told me that she was nearing such a merging point in her life when I first met her, and a comprehension of that intuitive moment was now at hand.

She thanked me and others for being there for her in her life. I include her precious words in this story here as she wrote them: “Things are coming together for me. And I feel like I am now just starting to live MY life. On MY terms. You were nothing but a huge inspiration to me to step forward with all of these things that were starting to seed and blossom in my mind. You came along with your miracle grow, sunshine, and refreshing misting calming waters and helped all my blossoms bloom big, full, and most importantly, strong! It is such an indescribable feeling you have bestowed upon me to just let go of all that has been holding me back. For so long I never believed in myself because I had always felt that no one else believed in me. I never thought I was good enough to accomplish these things I wanted from life. And the bird on the branch analogy says it best. For so long I have depended on that damn branch to hold me, to keep me safe. I now realize that the whole time I have had these wings; these sturdy, sure fire wings that will allow me to take off, allow me to glide through the air light as a feather. Gliding through the air, I now see all that I have been missing while desperately grasping the branch. I am free. I am focused. I am determined. I am ME.” Her revelations inspired me and brought me back to my own rebirth in the 1980s and 1990s. I learned a secret during my rebirth, a secret that “the Kingdom of God is within.” I shared that concept with my friend soon after we met and her words that she wrote testify that she knows the secret, too.

Her words, however, “I am ME,” hit me very hard. During my awakening in 1988, I received the insight that “I Am.” I

realized that we are like a cross on a mountain silhouetted by a beautiful sunset. I taught my clients the concept by using the iconic symbol of the cross. I asked them to put their arms out and realize how that posture resembled a cross. Then I asked them to say, “I am here.” Then I broke the phrase down to “I Am.” I explained further: I am me; I am a person; I am someone. Many of my clients realized from that exercise that they were a real person. It was amazing.

When my dear friend wrote realizing the same theme as I had taught others in the past, I knew that she had realized that she was a real person, one of value and beauty. I was touched and inspired.

I told her that she gave me a valuable gift by being a part of her “Merging River” that united her together as a new person. What she experienced is the greatest miracle of all. For me to be a part of that, is and equally great miracle.

I received profound inspiration from the synchronization of my young friend’s connection with Point Park and the enthusiasm she showed when she told me about her stay in Pittsburgh and the photos of her and her family at “The Point.”

I was eager to share the mystical, spiritual energy I experienced from the synchronization of the Merging Rivers in Pittsburgh with my dear friend in Florida and her own merging rivers. Remarkably, as I was thinking of sharing the story, I opened Facebook to review the images posted from one of my favorite Pittsburgh based photographers. As I scrolled down the page, I came to an image of an unbelievable double rainbow over the Point in Pittsburgh that astounded my spirit to its very core. I knew by the synchronization that something profoundly mystical was happening.

Rainbows are one of my most important signs and this one was no exception. Rainbows symbolize the reality of being.

The colors of the rainbow represent our diverse human feelings-our reality. The timing of the appearance of the Pittsburgh synchronization with the Merging River story was significant

My young friend and her family in front of Three Rivers Stadium, Just like my son and I had been three years later.

My friend enjoys Mt. Washington in a shot that reminded me of my own photos of my daughter and I in the same place in 1974.

This phenomenal photograph synchronized with insights that I was having and sharing about the spiritual relevance of the Three Rivers in Pittsburgh in my life and with my young friend’s awakening. When I saw this image, I was extremely inspired and moved. My thanks to Jimmie Sides III for the use of this photo.

and moving beyond words.

Rivers Merged. They merged across generations in a spiritual world where there is no time, only the spirit of life that bonds the Universe. My spirit soared. I was part of something significant, inspirational, and monumental. It was something that was bigger than me.

The following day, remarkably, my daily spiritual reading arrived in my inbox and contained a profound message that synchronized with the theme of my friend’s miracle. The message was the same as my friend’s when she wrote, “I AM Myself,” although the words in my inbox were a little different: How can I explain why and how a synchronized concept appeared from a place separate and remote from the events in my life? I can deduce that the only way that can happen is because, when we are living with a loving, spiritual heart, we are all an “I Am.” More miracles followed.

I shared the story of my young friend’s rebirth with my Florida friends. My dear friend from Unity responded that she was delighted and deeply moved, and my other photographer friend insightfully realized the significance of the special miracle that I shared with her.

Remarkably, I received a message in my Inbox of a daily meditational reading that amplified the revelations occurring at the moment with this young ladies awakening and how it touched everyone with brilliant light. The reading was all about, “I Am.” It explained the “I AM” concept clearly: “Here I AM. Your True Self. Look at Me and see Yourself.

I am your Co-signer and your Heritage. I AM you and you ARE I. Now you are getting closer to the Truth of Who you really are and What you are really made of. You are more than any words can say.

Still, just the same, I whisper your Greatness. ‘Thou art I. I AM thou. Hello, Myself.’”

My friend wrote, “I am me.” My friend knew the spiriA rainbow touches a skyscraper in the Golden Triangle downtown.

tual secret of being her true, spiritual, loving self.

Her life will never be the same. The lives of those she touched with the story of her miracle will never be the same, either.

What a magnificent, beautiful story!

I am greatly blessed to have been a part of these cherished friends transformations. My own rebirth in 1988 was awesome, but it was nothing compared to the inspiration I experiences as my dear friends sprouted wings and flew high into to the mystical heavans. Their experiences have transformed me and given me the greatest gifts that anyone could ever ask for!

The fountain glows orange with the setting sun over Mt. Washington.

One of the lovely flower photos my Florida friend specializes in taking.

The overlooks on Mt. Washington and Grandview Avenue appear on the left-top of the photo.

The fountain glows in the twilight.