Fran White Journal - Act 1

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Journal ACT 1



ACT 1

Preface

My Art Life Family & Friends Lockdown

Produced by Pure Arts Group, Edited by Lesley Samms, Designed by Kristina Alexander Copyright 2024 Fran White Art



Preface I first began recording my thoughts and feelings in a journal format as a consequence of a personality test conducted by my art mentor Lesley Samms. The test indicated I might benefit from writing things down in order to help me unpack and process experiences both past and present. I have found the process immeasurably helpful, especially during and post lockdown. It has definitely met an emotional need I was struggling to land for a while, allowing me to de-clutter both emotionally and physically. Creating the individual journal entries can be quite uncomfortable, but has been incredibly rewarding and delivered the added bonus of helping me stay connected with both myself and my family heritage. I have received so many amazing responses to the journal entries over the past few years as I have posted them on my website, so I thought I would create a compilation of the first few years entries here in this printed book. I hope you enjoy reading them.

Love, Fran x


My Art Life JOURNAL 1

1. Life Lessons 2. Routine 3. WIP 4. New from Old 5. Making Art 6. Importance of Play 7. Journey Through Time 9. Why Is Practice Important? 6

Fran White: Journal 1


Becoming Fran My Art Life

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Introduction

Art has been an intrinsic part of my life for the whole of my life. As an escape and distraction and a place of peace and quiet exploration and contemplation. An early creative output was knitting which I learnt from my mother and/or one of our nannies. I was introduced to embroidery at my first boarding school, Knighton House in Dorset. Later, at Cranbourne Chase, we had proper sewing lessons, taught by Miss Gregson, where we made a sampler of stitches, and other projects including a child’s outfit. At home I made clothes for my dolls by hand. A sewing machine came later as did lots of clothes for me. I was compelled to make, not realising at the time how my creative output was an essential element of my well-being. I was encouraged in my creativity by my stepmother, Rosamund, who was herself extremely creative. I began my adult creative journey in 1970 when a friend taught me to process and print black and white film. A few years later I began working as a photographer’s assistant and stylist. This triggered a chain of events that eventually led me to textiles and linen weaving and more recently painting. At what point fabric, such as linen became so important is hard to trace but I am certain that an interest in textiles came from my paternal granny. I still have pieces from her trousseau, linen towels and tablecloths bearing her monogram. Whether an amazing chenille shawl with long black tassels came from her I’m not sure. Equally I feel I inherited an interest in clothes and fabric from my maternal grandmother, Eileen, whose lady’s maid Kathleen would lay out her clothes for the next day under a piece of embroidered cloth which I still have. Her father’s family had a dry goods store in Montreal where she was born. I find painting has a satisfying immediacy and can be applied straight on to canvases, which do not necessarily need glazing and/or framing. I prefer to use acrylic paint as this allows for a lot of processing and drys much quicker than oils. Also, I can mix a large assortment of mediums with it. Having been taught water-colour by several tutors I found acrylic was the natural way for me to go. Mixed with water it can be used in a similar way. I tend to work in series. These can be initiated by activities such as my book club and my women reading series, or an image on social media or in a newspaper, particularly if it involves one of my deep interests - shadows. I take a lot of photos at home in Sussex, Norfolk and when abroad. These all inform my subject matter.

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Drawing is the foundation for a lot of my work and gives me the chance to experiment with lots of different equipment - Ink Intense Derwent crayons, Viarco Artgraf soluble graphite products (https://www.viarco.pt/en/artgraf-xl/), homemade charcoal etc. When I am walking, a pencil and sketchbook often accompany me, a simple tool to take out on location. Having said that, I also at times take lots of different drawing tools, watercolours, and an assortment of backgrounds outside. I have been very lucky to have an art studio in my home. Until very recently this was sited in our conservatory. While this was being repaired however I moved to a new space, the model room/winter studio, next to the original front door but still over looking the garden. This move has been a trigger for new inspiration as I see my work differently in this new space. Being an artist gives me the chance to be a bit of a detective, searching and investigating a subject or subjects. For instance, I am currently embarking on a new path where I will be comparing my paternal granny’s journey from teenager to adulthood with my own similar journey. We were both debutantes, she in 1902 me in 1969. I think I was more of a reluctant one than her. I intend to use her ‘Memory’ books and albums, which have only recently come into my possession, dating from 1894 to her death in 1955. I will compare these with my own scrapbooks and saved correspondence. I am inspired by many artists, significantly Prunella Clough (https://en.wikipedia.org/ wiki/Prunella_Clough), who I was once told I look like. It seems she used a very similar investigative approach to her subjects, often taking lots of photographs, using sketchbooks and different backgrounds. One of my tutors once remarked that I ‘like to work on awkward surfaces’ - as did Sandra Blow who is another hero. I am also intrigued by Dame Phyllida Barlow (https:// en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phyllida_Barlow). Having recently read her obituaries she sounds like an amazing teacher, friend, and artist. In fact a fellow Pure (pureartsgroup.co.uk) artist Chérie Lubbock (cherielubbockart.co.uk) wrote a college essay about her which I’m looking forward to reading. In this book I explore my art journey in more detail. How I make art, the challenges and lessons faced, the process and inspiration…

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Life Lessons “When I consider life, ‘t is all a cheat. Yet fool’d with hope, men favour the deceit; Trust on, and think to-morrow will repay. To-morrow ‘s falser than the former day; Lies worse, and while it says we shall be blest With some new joys, cuts off what we possest. Strange cozenage! none would live past years again, Yet all hope pleasure in what yet remain; And from the dregs of life think to receive What the first sprightly running could not give.” John Dryden 1631-1700 I memorised the first four lines of this quote in my teens when I spotted it in the Oxford Dictionary of Quotations at a friend’s house. Although I don’t necessarily understand it, it has stuck with me! Our English teacher, who was a Countess because she had been married to a Russian Count, taught us to memorise whole passages of Shakespeare as well as an incredible amount of practising with English vocab [vocabulary], for which I am eternally grateful. When I started The Linen Shop in 1999, I was very green and had no idea about selling my industrially woven linen fabrics, where to find customers etc. I went on a very steep learning curve and was dismayed that, to sell to the ‘trade’, I had to ‘jump through lots of hoops’ such as wash test for shrinkage, have all the fabrics ‘rub tested’ for possible upholstery use, light fastness tests… and fabric to be used in hotels also had to be coated with Fire Retardant. I was recommended to an English Interior Designer based in Paris. Before we met, I had already sold yards and yards of cloth to her - but she took an instant dislike to my linens. She saw I was upset by this and told me that just because she didn’t like it didn’t mean no one else would!!

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Eventually I realised that I could confidently admit my stock was perfect for curtaining and clothing, and most of it would be perfectly suited for upholstering a bedroom chair but possibly no good for a much-used living-room one. If you love it use it but be aware of its limitations.

A life lesson.

I was reminded recently of these experiences when talking to a fellow artist about her sculptures. She was concerned how safe they were when being used in a garden setting i.e., that they wouldn’t fall over and kill someone! Once again if someone loves it, they’ll buy it. It is up to them to ensure it is placed appropriately dependent on their needs and requirements.

The Linen Shop in Sussex

A life lesson.

Shortly after leaving College, I went to a huge textile Trade Fair in Manchester. I had handwoven some samples for a competition being held there and I was disappointed not to have my samples selected. While we were there my friend and I persuaded ourselves that what I really needed was a bespoke cutting and rolling machine. This industrial beast arrived that summer and was hand built in our house in what is now my present studio. It was a mad moment of self- indulgence that I lived to regret for years. Clearly the machine didn’t like the different thicknesses of my linens and consequently never measured correct yardage. We simply use the machine to re-roll the huge bolts of linen delivered from the Mills, on to smaller cardboard tubes.

The Linen Shop at Olympia Fran and the cutting & rolling machine

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Life Lessons The Nuthurst Community Allotement being developed during lockdown

We hand cut our orders, sometimes up to 50 metres, on a wooden table specifically designed for this by my husband Angus. Eventually the machine was dismantled and re-built in the Barn from where we sold it for a song to someone in the ‘rag trade’ based in Birmingham.

A life lesson.

In the mid 1990s I recall joining a philosophy group. We met weekly to read and discuss philosophical material. During the tea break there were many books for sale. Previously I would have bought the lot, but I realised there was no hurry or need to do this.

The realisation of a life lesson.

I’ve always been drawn to the idea of allotments, not necessarily tending one myself but the romance of growing your own veg, space to contemplate in or by your own garden shed. Curiously we now have the Nuthurst Community Allotment, which we started in lockdown, at the bottom of our drive, based in the former propagation area designed by my husband for his nursery - Architectural Plants. In 2014 he relocated his business to a purposebuilt site near Pulborough. Over 34 years I have watched the field alongside our drive develop into a full-blown nursery. It started with one greenhouse which was, over time, enlarged, also a small propagation tunnel with state-of-the-art fogging, this too moved into the large greenhouse which is now the Fruitery of the Allotment.

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Change is the only certain

In a similar manner I remember moving to our family home in the mid 1950’s which my father inherited after my grandfather died. To help maintain the very large walled gardens my parents grassed over a lot of the flower beds. About 20 years later my father and stepmother opened the Kilverstone Wildlife Park, specialising in South American animals. In this same area and beyond - a lot of the animal cages were built, by my father, they butted up against the walls. The Park closed in the mid 1990’s. My brother and his wife have now changed everything back to a formal garden.

The cycle of life is a continuum

These lessons have taught me many things that I now bring to my life and my art, including: It is ok to play - there is no right or wrong. Be true to yourself. To quote the final line in a helpful poem I was given a long time ago So live to learn and know yourself, in doing so you will learn to live.’ [*see whole poem below] There is so much more freedom in making art, than running The Linen Shop, especially if you’re not desperately trying to sell it!! I tend to try and find meaning in everything, and/or ‘there is always a silver lining’; a positive approach one can choose to take.

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Life Lessons Full Poem... After a while you learn the subtle difference Between holding a hand & chaining a soul, And you learn that love doesn’t mean security And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts And presents aren’t promises And you begin to accept your defeats With you head up and your eyes open And with the grace of an adult, not the Grief of a child And you learn to build all your roads on TODAY Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain For your plans, After a while you learn that even sunshine Burns if you get too much So plant your own garden and decorate Your own soul - instead of waiting for Someone to bring you flowers. And you will learn that you really can endure, That you really are special And that you really do have worth. ‘So live to learn and know yourself, in doing so you will learn to live’.

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Routine

For many years I have been visiting Emily Ball at Seawhite for painting courses, but this stopped during the pandemic. Having recently started going again I was reminded of the importance of routine and the well-being benefits I experience as a result. Routines help us create positive daily habits that we can organise our time around. Things that we deem important, to maintain happiness and feelings of fulfilment and self-worth. I first discovered Seawhite of Brighton in 1995 while I was studying print and weave at Farnham. Long before they had a retail shop we used to visit their warehouse and select art supplies. It was my drawing teacher, Penny Hopkins who told me you could go directly to their warehouse in Partridge Green. You could also buy these same sketch books from the College shop but going direct was clearly cheaper for students. I discovered Emily Ball via the ‘grapevine’; it could have been our neighbour potter/painter Clare Sutcliffe, fellow Pure artist Edith Barton or my Australian friend Jane Grinling, a dress designer who used to trade in London as Jane Caitlin. I met her through friends after she’d moved to Sussex. She designed some jackets for my Linen Shop business and she also taught me watercolour painting at her home. I initially joined Emily Ball’s RACKHAM CONTEMPORARY ART courses held at Rackham Village Hall. This was one morning a week and culminated with an Exhibition there Summer 2005. When I joined Emily’s Wednesday group in October 2005 Emily was renting studio space from the Seawhite Art Shop, suppliers to Colleges & Museums, in Partridge Green. The Wednesday group course was for a full day, 9.30-4.30, spread over Winter, Spring

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Routine and Summer Academic Terms. Eventually Emily moved totally to Partridge Green trading as the EMILY BALL AT SEAWHITE Contemporary PAINTING COURSES. The first Seawhite course I attended was “Hands, Head & Feet” in Autumn 2005 tutored by Katie Sollohub, and the most recent has been The Creative Painting Space January 2022 tutored over 3 days by Emily Ball. During these 17 years I’ve been on many year long and short courses, as well as several online during the Lockdown; Wabi Sabi with Helen Turner; Putting People into Paint tutored by Helen Turner & Gary Goodman; Painting Pattern & Expanded Painting with Nick Bodimeade; Master Classes with John Skinner; Art as Autobiography by Katie Sollohub, and a variety of courses with Simon Carter, Gary Wragg and Julian Brown. Other regular habits and routines I have developed over the years include meditation, cooking, walking, pilates, yoga, and visiting Art Galleries. Due to the orientation of our home I tend to spend the mornings in my office/sewing room where the sun streams in and the afternoons in my Studio on the western side of the house. In the mornings I focus more on paperwork and computer based activities. In the afternoons I enjoy contemplating, exploring and creating. Record keeping is another habit I have developed. Before digital photography I recorded our home and family life in large albums, this was inspired by my father who did the same for our family

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when I was growing up. I have 20 of these which we regularly refer to when reminiscing &/or reminding ourselves of various dates and years.

our Photos from

albums

Similarly I have lots of sketchbooks where I kept a record of most of the courses I attended at Seawhite, writing notes learnt from tutors on each different course, as well as printing out photos of the work we all did and the Exhibitions we were all involved in. Record keeping is important to me as it is evidence of my ongoing curiosity and interest in continuing to learn. It also gives structure to my day - stops me being diverted, keeps me focused, busy and happy. As a family we all have a tendency to being very focused when involved in what we each do best, a shared work ethic; diligent, finishing jobs. I’ve also learnt a lot from 3 girlfriends whom I met locally through my children’s schools. We all shared a love of textiles and creativity. We have supported each other bringing up our children, school runs, holidays, watched them marry and have their own children. After completing a distance learning course, A Creative Approach to Textiles, with the Open College of the Arts, my dress historian friend Andy and I went on to different colleges as mature students. We shared ways of dealing with our work load/studies and our families.

Book Club Girls

I met Chris at our village school gate when we were delivering our daughters. She taught deaf children and was a huge help to me when I started wearing hearing aids. Chris has taught me many routines

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Routine - gardening and book reading to name a few! In 1998

Fran with Jane & Chris

she and I started a Book Club with Emily, this became 5 members. We have all learnt from each other ways to work, rest & play - even taking time out to go together to Ragdale Spa! Since 1995 Edie and I have been holidaying with our families in North Cornwall. We’ve spent many happy hours walking the cliffs and beaches, collecting pebbles, sketching and boogy boarding. We’ve been to many Seawhite courses and she has taught me routines around painting and creating. I find her artistic creations endlessly inspiring. Various people I follow on Instagram mention routines - for work as well as for Artist retreats - in fact one of these is in Cornwall. Being a member of the Pure Arts Group has also introduced me to new ideas and ways of

Fran with Andy

living. Recently I came across Dr Rangan Chatterjee’s new book ‘Happy Mind, Happy Life: 10 Simple Ways to Feel Great Every Day’. A routine he suggests is:‘Go on holiday every day’ ‘your daily holiday should be something you do alone, that brings you into the present moment, that doesn’t rely on a smartphone and that is done in complete silence’. Examples are Walking, Running, Yoga, Swimming, Cycling. These observations have introduced me to new ways to structure my days. Giving me space to follow my

Fran with Edie

painting. Gifted me ideas on where and how to be creative. Hopefully they will also help me divest of old limiting habits such as procrastinating so I can spend more time in my studio…creating.

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WIP

Early investigations for Park Life

of the e on is te a e cr to e r si The de an soul. m u h e th of s g in n r a e deepest y - Uchtdorf

Most definitely, it is the yearning that drives me to practice and create. Quite recently I have become aware however that to create a painting, for me is not a simple or singular act of placing paint on a substrate. It takes time, quite a lot of time, and each painting evolves through the process until it emerges at some point – not always of my knowing. For example, my painting Park Life which started its journey in Cornwall in late summer 2019. It then evolved throughout the winter, before emerging complete very recently. Or is it complete?

Park Life – The Full Story

It was a hot day on the beach. I had already been observing and painting on the beach, so my mind was engaged with women reading. Walking back to the house I noticed Edith lying on a bench reading and I took a photograph. She wasn’t feeling well so she was not aware I had taken the photograph, but I told her afterwards. When I returned home I created watercolour postcards to find my way in, which is the way I tend to work, then I collaged to extract more information and at the same time started to abstract the image. I

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WIP Park Life studies

then moved on to oil sticks on cardboard and eventually un-primed fabric and linen stuck on to board and canvas. I found this element particularly challenging but under the tutelage of Nick Bodimeade, eventually found a way through. Bigger primed linen canvas followed and that’s when I felt the painting started to evolve and manifest – this step was critical and the outcomes were fruitful as they gave me more than I expected. I realised during the process that I needed to abstract some elements, in order to understand what was necessary to keep. Again, prompted by Nick I focused on the marks as opposed to the whole. I initially chose a bright sunny colour palette, representative of the season, but this evolved to anything I could find as the painting evolved. I spent some time looking at paints; their properties and transparency/opacity. For the most part, I really enjoyed the journey from real depiction to abstraction. Some limiting beliefs kept creeping in but I pushed ahead and still showed it to a few trusted people for a response. Their feedback pulled me along and I got completely into my flow; I became unstoppable, at which point the painting took on its own life.

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Park Life - the end

It is Now Finished, I Think

The final piece is a cardboard cut out that I will now have framed, but there are other elements that I might also frame. The feeling of reaching this point in the journey fills me with satisfaction – it was an artful fight and I one enjoyed immensely. I also feel I may have found my working methodology, for now, that will support me continuing to grow as an artist.

What I have learnt from this process:.. Keep on keeping on

This process unlocks the opportunity to look at the next steps – selection, framing, exhibiting etc. I am resilient – I don’t give up easily My Art Life

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New from Old Make Do and Mend was a pamphlet issued by the British Ministry of Information in the midst of WWII. It was intended to provide housewives with useful tips on how to be both frugal and stylish in times of harsh rationing. With its thrifty design ideas and advice on reusing old clothing, the pamphlet was an indispensable guide for households. Interestingly, an updated version of the book was released to coincide with the economic recession in 2009, offering similar frugal advice for 21st century families. (https://www.iwm. org.uk/history/10-top-tips-for-winning-atmake-do-and-mend). The health of humanity and its possible demise remains a real and ever-present topic today, but for different reasons. We are no longer in the midst of war and rationing, but our human behaviour still poses significant threat to the health of our planet. As such I constantly challenge myself to seek sustainable solutions for my creative practice. If I am totally honest, this approach also suits my personality type, as I am very curious and continually on a journey of self-discovery, as many of you who read my blog regularly will I am sure by now have realised. My artwork is a constant journey of seeking and discovering, of research and repurposing, and the visual language I have created for myself lies somewhere between figurative and abstraction, but this is an ever-evolving conversation!

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During lockdown I had no choice but to reuse and repurpose, as purchasing new was quite difficult. Born out of this necessity, I have found myself re-engaging with old works and reacting to ‘displays’ I always have hanging up in my studio and which I constantly change, and I realised that many were still unfinished – they still had some travelling to do…

In The Groove

This activity also coincided with the Smallhythe artists weekly Zoom meetings, where the theme chosen was Repurposing New from Old. The first piece I started to work on was ‘In the Grove’. I referenced an outline drawing I’d done from studies made in the Autumn of 2019, of my daughter reading in the lobby of The Grove Hotel, Hertfordshire. The final painting on canvas was made on top of an unfinished study from my Bodytalk series which I turned upside down. I was delighted to find ‘gifts’ appeared through the new painting from the old work underneath. I found the whole process investigative and exciting, which is right up my street, but as usual I struggled with knowing when to stop the search! However, on 31st of January I was challenged by fellow artist Julia Stubbs to join ‘The Hundred Day Project’, sharing our work daily on Instagram and Facebook, which took me down another avenue and enabled a natural transition from the Smallhythe project.

In My View

Subsequently I have exhibited ‘Green Grove’, an acrylic painting on paper, at the ‘Muchness’ Exhibition held at Smallhythe Studio hosted

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New from Old by Rowena McWilliams. I used a collage, made from several previous works, as a reference for this. Caitlin Lock filmed me while I was painting and this became a big part of the film she made about me and my work for the Pure Art360 event in April. I always love a project &/or challenge and doing the 100 day project has surpassed all of my expectations for a positive outcome. I continue to feel intrigued and excited as I explore possible new ways to use old work. Recently I’ve also been updating my Artwork Archive profile with works done over the past 20 years. During this period I realised I’ve already repurposed several of these and still have more to work with, including many Ink sketches as well as many more studies,

Newsreader study

although sometimes I believe my studies are finished works in themselves. Upon reflection I have also realised ‘In my view’, which I painted in 2017 and also exhibited at the ‘Muchness’ Exhibition is perfect exactly as it is! This period of investigation of old works and displays has allowed me time to reflect, and I have come to realise playing in my studio is something I can contentedly do for hours on end. It brings me great pleasure and underpins my purpose right now.

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Green Grove


Making Art “Don’t think aboutmaking art, just get it done. Let everyone else decide if it’s good or bad, whether they love it or hate it. While they are deciding, make even moreart.” – Andy Warhol

I read an article recently where researchers suggested that after just 45 minutes of art-making, levels of the hormone cortisol, which is associated with stress, were reduced in all participants’ regardless of their prior art skills. Another small study also found that spending 30 minutes creating art, especially free-form painting, was associated with reduced anxiety levels in first-year college students preparing for their final exams. During lockdown 2 I have been working on the making module of the Pure Foundation programme, making art most days and I have found it has worked its magic on keeping me calm and relaxed.

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Making Art

Fran sketching Leaning Tree I started on Module 2 in Oct/Nov 2020 and have found the structured activities and reading materials really useful in starting me off. From there I can in the words of Warhol “just get on with it’. So far I have created a charcoal & rubber drawing of shadows from my studio door; paintings on canvas, some with added fabric, also inspired by shadows spotted in my home surroundings; a series of themed shadow paintings referencing the same shadow photograph:Bevelled, Boro, Cubist, Caveman, Baroque, Egyptian, Surrealist, Frida Kahlo, Seascape, and a digital version which I made on 28th January 2021. In early November I also made brushes from plant and fabric materials following the Lorna Crane online course. And at the end of November I made a Rainbow Cake and a Collage of ‘Fran & her life’. In early December, suggested by my mother, I repurposed some knitting that was to become a wrap cardigan, into a scarf. The other activity that I do regularly that keeps me calm and relaxed and helps counter my osteoporosis, is walking. I love walking, often using Nordic Sticks for posture, strengthening & speed - sometimes taking a sketchbook with me, as well as using my phone to take inspirational pictures. I often return regularly to a particular site or tree that fascinates me, as in my recent ‘Leaning Tree’ series of sketches and paintings.

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I try to make art everyday as it helps me maintain focus and clarity and takes me away from overthinking. In order to enable this, I find it is a good practise if I make my studio accessible, warm in Winter & ‘ready to go’, this and having a project &/or challenge helps me make daily art. However, this is always balanced against my family commitments and time with those I love. Apart from making art, photography, cooking, music and writing are my other passions in life and keep me grounded and content. During lockdown 2 & 3 we were a bubble of 5. As a group we did a lot of cooking in the kitchen and outside on a Bonfire cooking baked potatoes, sausages - we even made a pizza oven. Although I love sharing prepping & cooking with others, I also enjoy cooking on my own. One of the ways I celebrated my 70th Birthday during Lockdown 3 was by making Ottolenghi nut & chocolate cookies which I posted to family & friends finding 20 + suitable containers was quite a task as well as getting them all to the local post office - they were very helpful, which was unexpected but immensely supportive. I enjoy listening to Van Morrison, or instrumental music when painting or writing, but, my hearing aids do impede the breadth of my listening. I love writing & receiving hand written notes/letters, which I think comes from the letters my parents sent me as a child when I was at boarding school, however their handwriting was very difficult to read; something I appear to have inherited!. I regularly write Blogs

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Shadow sketches

Sausages inside pizza oven Shadows on artwork

Shadows on artwork

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for my website. Oct/Nov 2020 I took part in The 21 Day Abundance Meditation writing up notes and observations in a Journal, which was important to me. I also recently found my old box brownie camera, which is actually an ellipse shape. This reminded me strongly of my childhood and winding film on and taking photos on trips, both at home and abroad. I also now realise I still have my old enlarger and all the equipment from when I had my darkroom at home. I may explore this again one day… All of these activities have helped support my well being during this time enormously and now lockdown is easing I am happy to be seeing my Personal Trainer in real life and joining a new One to One Yoga session, also in real life. I am also looking forward to visiting exhibitions alone and with friends, and painting with other artists. I will continue to revisit previous work and see how I can integrate these with new projects. I’m currently researching ancient Holly trees which I’ve noticed at home in Sussex as well as in Norfolk. I’m also keen to follow up on ‘Chained Libraries’ having visited the one in Hereford Cathedral Summer 2019. Another possible lead is to instigate collaborations similar to the Smallhythe artists zoom meet ups which we started in Lockdown 1…

The future looks promising. There is lots to look forward to with excitement and anticipation. My Art Life

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Importance of Play “Do not grow old, no matter how long you live. Never cease to stand like curious children before the great mystery into which we were born…” – Albert Einstein

Play is as important for adults as it is for children, especially in todays (usually) busy world. And even during these Covid times it helps us stay calm and connected to our creative selves; helping us find useful and innovative solutions for the issues we are facing and constructively investigate and manage the difficult feelings and emotions we are experiencing. Play releases endorphins, which improves brain functionality, and is proven to stimulate creativity and growth of the cerebral cortex, which plays a key role in attention, perception, awareness, thought, memory, language, and consciousness. Former children’s laureate, Michael Rosen in his Book of Play: Why play really matters, and 101 ways to get more of it in your life, talks about how play contributes to both our creativity and resilience. Myself and my family love this book as it is packed with silly activities and reminders for creative indoor and outdoor play, covering everything from doodling to word play and after-dinner games.

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Inspired by Michael Rosens book, I have turned to play episodically during this past year, at times when I have struggled to keep myself on track for whatever reason. At first I didn’t realise how significant making a daily drawing ‘while the kettle boiled’ would become. I am now very aware this daily practice has fed life into my various art projects and explorations, such as the current #newfromold project, as well as helping to preserve my mental health and well-being. During Lockdown 1 I played with what I had in my studio; I discovered I actually had more than enough, which surprised me! I was pulled along by playing, experimenting, just trying ‘one more thing’ over & over again, which eventually led me to pick up some scissors and start ‘drawing”, inspired by the work of Geta Bratescu and the Matisse cut outs.

Sketchbook taken out on location

Studies in Frans studio

I first came across Geta Bratescu at the 2017 Venice Biennale, she was representing Romania with a huge pavilion stuffed full of her incredible artworks. A few years later I saw her drawings at a Hauser & Wirth exhibition in Savile Row. She used scissors to ‘draw’ with and I thought why not try to draw the kettle this way. This coincided with an online course I took with The London Drawing Group studying Matisse’s cut outs. I became scissor happy - in fact I gave this title to some of my #whilethekettleboils artwork. This daily practice increased my visual perception and awareness, which in turn heightened my awareness of the world around me. I started to

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Importance of Play

Cat & shadoes reflected in piano

2 sketches collaged together

notice unexpected shadows at home and abroad [Not actually out in the world, simply at my mother’s home in Norfolk!]. I found I became more playful, open to processing these ‘lines of enquiry’ in a limitless manner, opening myself up to the many unexpected possibilities. Allowing vulnerability to take the lead without fear of failure but a willingness to try new things, learn and grow. To notice what I noticed and dwell for a while in the experience, letting the outcome find me. As the year has unfolded and the lockdowns have come and gone I have gradually engaged more with the outside world. I have pursued a very rewarding collaboration with Rowena McWilliams at Smallhythe Studio and I have undertaken some online courses, including the Pure Foundation programme. Play lends itself perfectly to collaboration and currently I am working in my studio, repurposing old work toward a potential collaborative project with Rowena McWilliams and fellow artist Phil Auden. The project is titled #newfromold. We will see how it evolves but it may potentially lead to an exhibition…in due course when we can.

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The process of creating

When I start a new subject i.e. A woman reading under a tree, as part of the project Women Who Read, I do a lot of exploratory studies. In this instance I worked from a photograph which I distilled in many ways, drawing, collage, cut outs, layering, different backgrounds etc. before arriving at the final painting - Normal People, so called as that’s the book the woman was reading. When I’ve completed the final picture I tidy up, document and file these many studies in order to decide which to keep. During Lockdown 3 I did a lot more sorting and tidying of these studies from different paintings and tried to chuck them in the bin. They wouldn’t have it, so I thought there must be more there for me to discover/uncover, play with and learn from,

Templates in Fran’s studio

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Importance of Play

so I have been using these as the source material for the #newfromold project I am working on with Rowena and Phil. I follow a sort of ‘what if ’ enquiry - what if I put this with that - shapes, textures, paper, fabric, templates - look again at older work - look at negative shapes, perhaps turn it upside down, on its’ side and/or enlarge a section of it. There are no hard and fast rules, only my energy keeps me going or stops me, and how much space I allow myself to spread into in my studio. Prior to our weekly meetings online, Rowena, Phil and I share our work on WhatsApp. Phil then uploads them onto his computer so we can all discuss, critique and encourage each other. I am really enjoying this process and the project itself. I really love the repurposing element; I had an inkling that my previous investigations into my subject had a lot more to offer, it turns out I was right. I have also come to realise that the opportunity to focus and put in to practise all I have learnt from all of the workshops I have attended over the past 20 years is a precious gift. This last year has in retrospect been a period of seemingly unending possibilities, I can follow so many different paths, go on so many incredible journeys and all inside my studio and my own head.

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Sketch done out on a walk

Nothing is wasted if it is given time and attention.

For example, in 2014 I started a year long course called ART AS AUTOBIOGRAPHY tutored by Katie Sollohub held at Emily Ball at Seawhites. I constantly refer to the sketchbooks and notebooks I did at the time as well as all the artworks. The notebooks are really useful as they help me recall information and suggestions made by the tutors, who both encouraged and, occasionally, diverted me along a different path. I also used some of these enquires to help me with ‘The Story of my Life’ for the Mindset module in the Pure Foundation programme. I found this module challenging to begin with as it pushed my boundaries and my mind pushed back! Ultimately however, the learning it revealed has helped me move forward both professionally and personally. I now realise what excites me most about the #newfromold project is the joy of returning to previous currents of thought and looking at them with new clearer eyes. The gap of time &/or a period of reflection helps me make new discoveries and combinations. This appears to have parallels with other forms of creativity - cooking, sewing, gardening even walking, especially if I take a sketchbook with me!

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Journey Through Time An artists journey through time What do I communicate when I do what I do…. Art is not the product of individuals, it is the product of a community. It reflects collective beliefs, values and ideas. My art reflects the collective beliefs of my family and friends and the many people I have met and spent time with along the way, and more recently as I have transitioned from my career as a weaver and linen shop owner to full time painter. Considered in response to Alfred North Whiteheads words “The pattern I create with my art is a reflection of my memories and deep seated emotional responses to past collective experiences: events, people and places and our commonly held beliefs, values and ideas.” This article will explore the key events, people and places encompassed in my personal journey and attempt to uncover the key beliefs, values and ideas that motivate my artistic output.

“Art is the imposing of a pattern on an experience and our aesthetic enjoyment is recognition of the pattern.” - Alfred North Whitehead 1861 - 1947

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Fran , Tom and Sal at Linen Hire 1990s


Fran photographed by Jenny Benjamin - 1970s

As a child my family lived near Thetford in Norfolk. I was born into privilege, which seems to have engendered a deep innate sense of duty in me - doing the right thing is a core value I still retain today. I was the 1st of 4 children and often felt protective over the others; a sensibility that became more profound after our parents divorced. I attended a fairly progressive boarding school called Cranbourne Chase, housed at Wardour Castle, near Tisbury, Wiltshire. It had a female head mistress and a considerable art & music department. Despite this my creative gene seemed to go completely unnoticed during this time! At least one of my school friends went on to art school, but, it never even entered my thinking to do anything similar. I don’t recall being actively discouraged from such a path, but looking back, I do remember being very keen to be considered able and accomplished in subjects such as english and maths, so maybe I was encouraged down an alternative path as a consequence of my own tendencies. My artistic journey really began in 1970, when I was 19 years old. I mixed with a lot of creatives at this point in my life (without realising I was actually one myself!). I had many friends who collected art, or who worked in &/or owned art galleries. I remember being especially drawn to the work of the Russian born artist Romain de Tirtoff, known by the pseudonym Erté, whom I first encountered at The Met in 1968 and I started collecting his work thereafter. One particular friend taught me how to develop & print B/W photos in their darkroom and this set me down a specific path, working as a photographers assistant then a photographic stylist [collecting props for editorial & advertising photo shoots], that would prevail for much of my young adult life.

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Journey Through Time At this time I started ‘Linen Hire’, a business I ran from my London home, supplying fabric backdrops for hire. I also started distance learning with the Open College of the Arts, which ended with my attending The Surrey Institute of Art & Design SIAD in Farnham, as it was known back then - now it is The University of the Creative Arts - specialising in weaving with linen. I also started attending West Dean College around this time.

cle MagazineFararnti about & her fabrics

After graduating college, encouraged by Ann Sutton, I began commissioning woven linen fabrics from mills in Ireland, Scotland & Belgium, to sell to trade & retail. I began my transition into retirement in 2016, triggered by the lease renewal on my shop. I realised that if I renewed for another 3 years, I would be 67 when it expired and that what I actually wanted to do more than sell linen was paint! The trend set early in my career of spending much of my time mixing with creatives still prevails today, but the art forms this circle now encompass is very wide, including textiles, fine art, photography, gardening, pottery, basket weaving… the list is endless. And in recent years I have added many new friends as a consequence of the painting courses I have attended and my membership of various creative communities including PURE Arts Group and Instagram, which can feel like a very real community as we share thoughts and ideas.

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Fran on en Textiles ite Wov rF an Wh nd at Decorex sta


My husband Angus and I live very close to Partridge Green where the Emily Ball at Seawhite courses are held. I’ve been attending these on & off since graduating college in 1998. Women Reading: …What has inspired and motivated my current series of work? I realised that a lot of the models we were drawing in the ‘putting people into painting’ course were reading, which triggered the initial spark for the Women Reading series I am a keen reader myself, I have a lot of books in my study and am in a book club, so this subject really resonated with me and drew me in. It has however now become something of an obsession - I see people reading everywhere!

Top Tip

I often find my key inspiration very close to home - hiding in plain sight so to speak… It pays to be vigilant as ‘women readers’ pop up all over the place, and very often at home! However, as I say it has now become something of an obsession, so I find I cannot turn around without catching sight of another opportunity.

Fran in Hyde Park by Jenny Benjamin 1970s

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Journey Through Time

My take-aways: What lessons has my artistic journey taught me…? Surround yourself with people who inspire and motivate you and never give up! Starting a new career can be difficult at any point in your life, but it is especially difficult when the career choice is something that calls for expansive emotional content. Being an artist can feel uncomfortable, overwhelming and highly emotional at times, but, I’ve learnt to push through this discomfort and keep moving forward - following my dream. Possibly the most important lesson for me however with regard to my personal career aspiration is you can’t do art wrong! You need to be brave and have courage to experiment and play. Often the best work comes when you least expect it, so don’t be scared, just keep going and trust the process.

If you have found this article interesting why not take a closer look at my artwork or maybe join me on an Emily Ball at Seawhite painting course. I look forward to meeting you...

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Why is practice important?

We are told we should never say ‘I can’t’ because we can and will if we practice. More accurately I am now aware as I progress on my personal journey, it should be ‘I can’t, yet’. To ‘practice’ in the broadest sense of the term is simply an activity we repeat regularly. We are practising all the time, whether we are aware of it or not. Even when we are not actively doing anything, our brain is still absorbing and learning, so we might as well make the most of the time and practice effectively. Musician Andrew Pouska defines practice as ‘the absorption, mastery and maintenance of skills’.

How do I practice being an artist practically?

I love learning and practising so this is very easy for me. I love going on the courses at Seawhites and West Dean. I’ve yet to try The Rabley Drawing Centre in Wiltshire but it’s on my bucket list.

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Why is practice important?

I find going on courses really helps give my artwork and me a focus. I have to prepare for the courses, especially if there is a list of what to do before the course and what to expect on the course. Courses also give me the opportunity to be away from my home environment and the many distractions it can present. They allow me time to play and process, they present me with new challenges that take me out of my comfort zone and they allow me time to practice critical judgment. I also find some of the course titles irresistible. Such as, Wabi Sabi, Painting & Pattern, The Creative Painting Space, Basketweaving, Experimental Printmaking, Collagraph & Block Print, Japanese Woodcut – especially if they are based at Seawhites in Partridge Green which is very close to my home. I realise now that each art course I take feeds my practice holistically – I used to consider them as separate entities, but now I recognise they are all part of the whole. How do I practice being an artist mentally? I am a gold member of Pure Arts Group, which allows me to access lots of personal and professional development and networking with other artists. I also have a coach and mentor who I see monthly to talk through where I’m at and plan out future steps

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Fran painiting

outside


Mentoring and coaching have really opened my eyes to new ways of being and doing. It has been extremely helpful to be guided as to when I’m ready as an artist for the World, and when it’s ready for me! Pure has given me an opportunity to meet other artists across a broad range of disciplines and appreciate different perspectives and attitudes. It has provided opportunities to

ur painting Fran watercolo le Spa at Ragda udioo Fran in her st

exhibit and guidance with applying for open submissions and competitions etc. Pure has also given structure to my art life and a collaborative group of fellow artists to grow alongside and occasionally have lunch with, all of which has been much appreciated.

Validation

To be externally validated is to place your happiness in the hands of the crowd. As an artist, this is a known risk, whether it be awaiting a sale or a reply from an open submission or competition. I have learned that to be happy I must validate myself. Be happy that I have created the best work I can at the time and present it in the best way I know how and have patience and persistence.

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Daily Challenges

p

/worksho

oom Sewing r

n reading

Fra Selfie of

The challenges I face every day as an artist are quite similar to those I have faced all my life, and many are internally based. Personally I find having a subject to focus on is a good place from which to embark on my painting journey; I can then quickly move onto my preferred visual language of shape, form, colour and line. My current inspiration comes from observing women reading.

Literature is born when something in life goes slightly adrift. - Simone de Beauvoir

As a keen reader, I have a lot of books in my study. I am also a member of a local book club, so this subject really resonates with me. I think the initial trigger for this current series, however, came about following a series of fortunate events, most notable of which (and those I can clearly remember!) were: The gift of The Reading Woman calendar for 2016, which included 12 images of “women at their books” alongside 12 woman’s words on the subjects of books & reading. My purchase of Women who Read are Dangerous at The Dulwich Picture Gallery. Participation in the Emily Ball at Seawhites Putting People into Painting course, where I realised a lot of the models were reading.

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Book Club phot o coll by Chris Har age t Fran reading

Fran’s studio

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Daily Challenges

This inspiration, however, may now be becoming something of an obsession as I seem to see people reading everywhere, which makes me wonder when will new inspiration strike. And when it does, will I even notice or will I be too distracted by women reading?

Procrastination The world needs dreamers and the world needs doers. But above all, the world needs dreamers who do. The authentic self is the soul made visible. Be grateful for the home you have, knowing that at this moment, All you have is all you need. Simple Abundance – A Daybook of Comfort & Joy by Sarah Ban Breathnach

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Working as an artist can be challenging, as you are only accountable to yourself. Procrastination is an ever-present danger, alongside loneliness, from which I know many artists suffer, due to the necessary isolation experienced from working as a “sole trader”. Historically, many artists ran studios where students and apprentices were trained and worked for the artist, supporting the completion of large scale works, without which many of the most historically significant artworks would never have been finished, and some possibly never even started. Botticelli, for example, had an active studio set up in 15th Century Florence and Leonardo De Vinci was permitted to have assistants and pupils in his own studio in Milan when he undertook commissions for the court of Ludovico Sforza. In a letter to Ludovico in 1496, Leonardo claims he was “having to maintain” six people at the time. Not something I would wish to contemplate – I struggle with managing a cleaner! Contemporary artists such as Damian Hirst have adopted this system and it is common among printmakers to have a studio assistant who produces their editions for them after the artist’s proofs are completed to the artist’s satisfaction. But for the majority of us, we work alone. When I am fully focused and healthy, procrastination is not something I personally suffer with greatly, however, I have developed some strategies to deal with it when it does occasionally strike:

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My top tips for dealing with procrastination:.. Create lists Set SMART Goals [specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, time-based) Establish a daily work routine/pattern of good habits Stay on task and try to avoid distractions – such as social media! Know when to ask for help Be kind to yourself Reward yourself Keep on top of essential paperwork, Keep my office desk clean & tidy, using pretty coloured folders to keep everything reachable & recognisable Listen more than speak – practice listening to myself as well as others Say NO more often than yes Be committed and reliable Cultivate a spirit of generosity and share gifts Adopt and maintain a positive mindset and attitude – which is a lot easier said than done! This is a tricky but essential skill in my opinion.

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My top tips to support a positive mindset are: Keep smiling Practice gratitude – train your brain to look for the positives every day Make conscious choices Name your emotions and use them to empower you not hold you back Accept compliments with good grace Remember everything takes practice Seek out good role models

People who have and continue to inspire me are: Basketmaker Jackie Binns – one of the most creative people I have ever met. Artist Francesca Clarke who introduced me to The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron and planted the actual idea that I am a Fine Artist (I was scared silly by this, & confused as I had just graduated as a weaver!) Potter & neighbour Clare Sutcliffe, who encouraged my creativity in all parts of my life My 92-year-old mum whose encouragement & interest in my art is forever motivating Weaver/Artist Ann Sutton who is a courageous example that anything is possible My husband and children who always support me and my creativity

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Family & Friends JOURNAL 2

1. Relationship with My Mother 2. Fish 3. Life Changing Moments 4. Memories are Made of This 5. Seeing Guin 6. Travelling to Europe

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ly 1990s

, ear Cornwall h rt o N n Holiday i

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Introduction th friend wi d n a r e Fran, broth

Nannies

My family and friends have been and still are a big influence on my life and have had a significant influence on my art. My relationship with my mother Elizabeth Ann, or Bub to her friends, has been one of the most significant and is a subject I revisit frequently, most especially during and after visits to Norfolk. My daughter’s recent move to France has also had a significant impact, as it has motivated me to travel more in Europe and experience new places and perspectives. I think I’ll probably visit Sal at least twice a year for at least a fortnight each time. I went this February, and we planned that my next visit would be in October, as I hadn’t seen their home either in early Spring or early Autumn. Significantly the surrounding vineyards change dramatically with the seasons. Maybe I’ll even set up my own studio there… This book explores my memories and experiences with family and friends and how they influence my art; an ongoing theme which I am sure will pop up in future writing…

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Relationship with My Mother

Fran & Mums at Goodwood Races

“To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or the climbing, falling colours of a rainbow.” - Maya Angelou I think we as humans have always reflected on the relationship between mother and child. In my experience this relationship can be complex and complicated, bound as it is in the memories of significant moments, of mundanity and the everyday, of decisions made [or not made], that sometimes our adult brains cannot fathom or fully remember. My relationship with my mother has been one of the most significant of my life and underpins my art life and the outcomes I present. In so many nuances, the trips and turns reflect the decisions she made for me and those I later made for myself as a result. Sometimes known and recognised, sometimes not, but as all art tends to be autobiographical, I’m sure closer inspection would readily reveal the connection.

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Relationship with My Mother My earliest memory of my mother is snuggling up to her incredibly soft cuffs on her [fur?] winter coat when traveling in the car. Also waiting anxiously on the train with my 3 siblings when she got off at a station to ‘buy a paper’! My mother’s parents were Canadian and moved to England in the 1920s where their 3 children were born. During the 2nd World War my grandmother became very ill and, aged 44, died of diabetes, shortly after the family had also lost

Shop s, The Linen m u M & n Fra orex 2002 stand at Dec

their 21-year-old son Paddy, who fought for England even though he was Canadian. My mother and my stepfather, Denis, shared an interest in all types of art, visiting art galleries here and abroad. Denis collected watercolours

ng Fran ‘s painti any’s’ Tiff ‘Breakfast at

by Cotman. He commissioned Tom Phillips to paint a portrait of my mother. Significantly this depicts her with an ancient symbolic racecourse in the background. As well as art, Denis and my mother shared a passion for horse racing which led to them starting their own Stud in Norfolk in the 1970s, where they bred their own and others’ horses. This was an interest which she still shares with her sister, who also owns racehorses. Their father, Major Holt, may have inspired this interest as he had huge success with his horses. As a consequence of her passion for art, my mother’s house is full of paintings, many of which reflect her status as an owner and breeder of racehorses.

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Pastel sketch of Mums reading

Another significant memory of my mother is of her wearing an orange dress & white tights to host a dinner party at home when I was on half-term break from boarding school - my parents electric blanket caught fire that night - she was rather embarrassed to meet the firemen in her trendy get up! My mother has been an amazing role model, as a mother, wife, running a ladies clothes shop, owning and working in a wine bar and working with the Red Cross, as her mother had done, all alongside running Wretham Stud. She is very good company. She is positive, sociable and has, recently, had terrific success with her home bred racehorses, which makes for an even more exciting visit, especially when we go to the racetrack and watch her horse win.

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Relationship with My Mother

Mums and Fran 1989

Winning horse at Yarmouth Races 2022

A few years ago, we made a memorable visit to see her elder sister in the Isle of Man together. Our flight was diverted and then cancelled, and we ended up being put up in a hotel in Edinburgh. In the middle of the night the Fire Alarm went off - this became quite an event as both of us wear hearing aids and to begin with I was unclear as to what was happening. We had to walk down 4 flights of stairs in our nighties & shelter under space blankets - during all of this there was not a single word of complaint from her. She has always been incredibly encouraging, giving me confidence and support in my life and travels, especially when I went to college in my 40s when my children were 10 & 12. She also bought several of my paintings when she visited the JFJ exhibition in Ditchling, alongside purchasing a watercolour from my website. She is a hard act to follow, but, as I reflect on my own journey, I appreciate myself and what I have achieved in my own life and I also appreciate our relationship very much, which has deepened over the years and a mutual respect has developed, especially over the past 18 months of the pandemic. I know she thinks I am ‘very brave’ in my dedication to my painting, and she enjoys reading these blogs, so I hope she will enjoy this one dedicated to her. Recently we discussed my sketches of ancient Holly trees made while staying with her. This project was inspired by similarly ancient trees I started sketching at home, and I look forward very much to many more discussions and adventures with her.

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Mums by Tom Phillips

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Fish Driving across America mid 1970s

There is a time to keep, and a time to cast away, but more than that the act of decluttering allows us the opportunity to revisit and revive long forgotten memories and reflect on them in our present before letting them go again, making space for new memories and experiences to create additional layers in our lived experience. As an artist, all of this also provides fresh inspiration and ideas that will filter in and inform my art.

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Recently while decluttering I found an old Christmas card from Bob Baillie. Bob was the skipper of DRIVER, a Yacht I worked on as crew in the Caribbean in 1974. In 1973 my step-brother Jamie sailed across the Atlantic on IMAGINE, a yacht he shared with 3 others. We devised a plan where I would meet up with him, my father [his step-father] and my step-mother [his mother] in English Harbour, Antigua. This rendezvous was arranged to take place after I had spent the New Year with my mother, step-father, sister, brother & friend, Clare, in Nassau, in the Bahamas.

Letter from Bob & Betsy

Yacht - Imagine

Before travelling to Antigua I flew to Belize, where I met up with a friend who was stationed there with the British Army. I travelled into Guatemala for the weekend with several of his friends before flying on to Antigua, arriving just before Jamie & his fellow sailors. The yacht DRIVER belonged to a Canadian family called Graham. Their plan was to sail it around the world, and from time to time, when they went home, they left Bob, a New Zealander in charge. DRIVER was anchored in English Harbour, close to IMAGINE, where I was living temporarily. While in English Harbour I worked on a large motor yacht, cooking for the crew and being a house keeper. The owners wanted me to stay on but I wasn’t keen. Jamie and I discovered that DRIVER was due to sail to Martinique to meet up with friends of the Grahams. Bob had a crew but we asked if I could join the yacht and cook for this trip. I was meant to leave the yacht in Martinique, luckily the guests insisted I stay,

With Graham family, San Francisco

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Fish

Ben, Fran - Bridge in Nassau

Fran & Jamie - English Harbour, Antigua

especially if I was going to do the cooking! This coincided with IMAGINE leaving English Harbour too. The crew of DRIVER was quite small, just myself Bob and a few others. Then an American, John, who’d previously worked on DRIVER joined us. Our job was to meet and entertain visitors, friends and/or relatives of the Grahams. During this time Bob nicknamed me Fish due to my surname, Fisher, not shortening my christian name to Fanny, Frannie or Fan as others had done! I crewed on DRIVER from the end of January to early May 1974. I loved the sense of freedom and adventure of Yacht life; light and freewheeling, no ties no duties. I really enjoyed sailing the boat with just Bob and John between hosting the visitors. One slightly alarming incident I do recall however was when I fell overboard! One night we were in a harbour but the head [loo] wasn’t working, so we had to use a bucket on the deck. It was very hot and our guests were sleeping on the deck. I tried to empty the bucket silently over the side. I managed that but then followed the bucket into the water. Not sure how I got back onboard, with the bucket still in my hand, as it was a long way to reach up for the ladder! I finally met Phil, the owner of DRIVER, in Martinique. He skippered us from there to Bermuda. He offered John and myself a voyage across the Atlantic, but instead we chose to fly to Johns family in Ohio and drive across the States. This was problematic for me as I had great

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Clare, Denis, Mums, Ben & Bridge in Nassau

trouble getting a visa to enter the States, and could only do so if I showed a return ticket to fly back to the UK. With hindsight this was a blessing. Reflecting on these times I have many happy memories of the whole adventure, most of which was unplanned. I appreciate now how well I did, using such an amazing opportunity to explore the world. I might have stayed in America with John, on reflection I’m happy the way things panned out. I would encourage anyone to give it a try, especially my own grandchildren - travelling is in my bones and their DNA. Bob and his wife Betsy kept in touch with long letters and Christmas cards for many years while travelling the seas on their own yacht. Looking back, I realise now for me painting is as adventurous as travelling, it’s a nail biting journey of exploration.

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Life Changing Moments ‘So many congratulations on the special news of Molly Elizabeth - so thrilled for yourselves & Sal & Woody a new venture in their life and yours!!’

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Picnic with grandsons I’ve been thinking about life-changing moments for a while now. My daughter recently had her first child, a daughter Molly, and I am aware this event has shifted my life trajectory for ever. The arrival of Molly has added another dimension to our family life; a 22nd great-grandchild for my mother, a new cousin for Tom’s children, and a new grandchild and cousin for Sal’s in-laws… Molly was born in Beaune, France on 3rd May this year. I worked in my garden all the previous day anxiously waiting for news! Two weeks after she was born, I drove to Burgundy to help Sal, as Woody had returned to the UK on business for a week. It was a much easier trip than the previous year when I’d had to do lots of PCR tests and fill in a “Passenger Locator Form”. On that trip I’d bought a pink portable fan which we used a lot this year to cool Molly down when we were out and about. We visited the doctor, pharmacy, supermarkets, the swimming pool shop, a huge DIY centre, the local Health Insurance office as well as touristy trips to Beaune and Chalons-Sur-Soâne. We also had home visits from the Midwife as well as many friends and neighbours and went

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Life Changing Moments

‘Thursdays Child - Far to Go’ out for wood fired pizzas and an amazing meal at a local Relaise & Chateau restaurant. In 1994 I bought a book by Janet Bolton about creating an appliqué Noah’s Ark, little knowing that I would start making this with my own linen fabric in 2016. Sal and Woody love my fabric and have used it in both their home and Gîtes, so I planned to give it to them once it was done. Then Molly arrived so I took it with me and completed it while I was there. I guess there is more sewing in the pipeline as I have made both grandsons fabric photobooks and toy linen dinosaurs over the years. Following the birth of Molly, my mother wrote us a congratulatory letter, which was a validation in print of this amazing occurrence and a continuation of my mother’s long held tradition

In the woods with Jack & Sam

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of letter writing – She wrote similar letters to me following the births of Tom and Sal.


My mothers’ letter triggered in me long forgotten memories of my own childhood and recollections of all the times life has considerably changed for me in the past, and more recently, including...

• My parents’ divorce in the late 1960s • Working a summer holiday season in Menorca 1972. • A June day in 1978 when I visited Angus, my husband to be, at Shepherds Cottage. When I arrived, he was mowing the grass -in 2014 I did a drawing of this memory • Getting married and buying our house in 1981 • The births of our children in 1983 & 1985. • Closing Linen Hire in London summer 1995 and starting college that Autumn, terrified - ‘frozen with fear’ to quote a friend • Introduction to meditation 1996-ish • Starting The Linen Shop in 1999 • Adjusting to meeting both Tom and Sal’s partners One particularly clear memory, that I considered significant at the time, was a trip in the mid 1970s. I recall driving a boyfriend to Dymchurch to visit some London based friends of his that holidayed there. I was reluctant to drive all the way to Dymchurch from London as it seemed like the back of beyond, but my boyfriend didn’t drive. Why I wonder did this place seem any less glamorous in my mind than The Riviera?!

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Life Changing Moments More recently I took this same road between Folkestone and Rye where I was collecting two paintings of mine that had been in the Drawing Life UK MEMO exhibition at Rye Art Gallery. I now appreciate memories can be deceptive however, as I didn’t recognise any part of the journey even though I don’t think it will have changed very much. Recent experiences which appear to have been life-shifting include

• • • •

Lockdown The start of the Nuthurst Community Allotment Sal & Woody moving to France spring 2021 Reading an obituary of a Female author - Susie Steiner, who died of a brain tumour on 2nd July aged only 51 • Attending a Memorial Service for Anne - who died of cancer 2 years ago • Having a painting accepted for Wells Art Contemporary Book in Hand Feet in Sand Something magical happens when you become a grandparent. As the old cliché goes it is the circle of life – the continuum. It is both reassuring and rewarding that as a grandparent you can be an anchor and solace, an educator and trusted companion for your grandchildren and equally your grandchildren can provide a reciprocal supporting role in your life. When my grandsons were born to my son and his wife, memories of when my son Tom was born came flooding back. Jack was born in August 2013, 5 weeks early. We were at a nephews wedding in London when we heard the news. We visited him in hospital the next morning. All nail biting as Tom was working in Moscow at the time and, very luckily was able to whizz back for the birth. Clearly, I was rather overwhelmed as shortly after I went on a Book Club

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trip to Ragdale Spa and was ill for several days with one of ‘mums’ migraines’. Sam’s birth date was Boxing Day 2015 - an extra Christmas gift! This adds to a least 2 other Christmas birthdays in our family.

Book in Hand Feet in Sand

I have a deep and valuable relationship with my grandsons now, built up over the years from babysitting them in London and the boys staying with us, both with and without their parents. Unconditional love arises when I spend time with them. I love to paint with them in my studio, sew, create, and cook together. Often picnicking outside or in my bedroom. We play ‘Going on holiday’ which means stuffing lots of suitcases very full of anything and everything before pretending to get on an airplane, dressed up in my clothes which they call meditating! We especially love mucking about outside in the woodland and stream as I did with my own kids. Just last week I spent 5 hours with the boys in their local shopping centre, Westfield. Once again, we avoided buying anything except for tea and supper stops. It reminded me of going to the Bluewater Centre with Sal and my mother-in-law, when we all had a wonderful time shopping and snacking! I also took Sam to visit Harrods Toy Department as we used to do in the late 1950’s. Needless to say, I found it quite a disappointment as most of the store was completely different. I was relieved to find

Linen dinosaur made by Fran

Fran & Chris - Rye Art Gallery 2022

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Life Changing Moments

Noah’s Ark applique stitiched by Fran the tiles had been left on the walls of the Food Hall which I used to frequent when I lived nearby, and the Egyptian relief escalator staircase was as I remembered. We avoided buying any new Lego but spent hours looking at a constructed model of Hogwarts. We also managed to buy a jute shopper with the Harrods logo stencilled in their famous green - no plastic bags anymore! Life is so rich if you let it happen naturally. Of course, it can also be very complicated, but the excitement is you never know what is around the corner, which is much like art when you get into it. I know all these moments and memories will merge with and emerge in my art eventually, although it is often difficult to trace their exact lineage in the outcomes. Having said that, if I am engaged in a subject such as ‘Women who read’ for example, I can spot possible subjects wherever I go. Lockdown gave me the opportunity to spend more time than ever in my studio and explore freely, allowing thoughts and ideas to percolate, solidify and emerge anew. And Sal & Woody moving to France has already inspired a recent body of work titled Thursday’s child. Who knows what will emerge next and in what form, but it is this not knowing that makes being an artist (and a grandmother) so exciting for me.

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Memories are Made of This... Fran, brother & friend with Nannies

C o t, F e s i o u q Tur

lapping Curtai et... n, Sunli k n a l B r a l u ght, Cell

Before getting married and having my own children I wasn’t particularly interested in children. Seeing friends’ kids mucking about on the beach in Dymchurch however brought back memories of my own childhood visits to Frinton-on-sea in Essex, the same dark English Channel cold waters…. We went to Frinton-on-sea practically every summer holiday from when I was born - like my parents had done before, although they didn’t meet there as kids. Our whole family went; myself and my three siblings, and lots of other families [Listers; Gores; Whittakers; Hills, etc] invited by my Mum, plus lots of Nannies, food from our home vegetable garden, which arrived in wooden crates and often lots of dogs. There was a family with an Indian Nanny who always wore a sari and had left her own young family in India. There were no pubs or fish & chips shops in Frinton-on-sea due to its 19th century founding century charter, which explicitly outlawed pubs, to avoid attracting the “wrong” sort of resident apparently. This also contributed to its very old-fashioned reputation. I remember you even had to drive across a railway level crossing to enter the town - another barrier to the outside world! We stayed at John’s Cottage, 1st Avenue. Opposite John’s Cottage was a large hotel with turrets; The Grand.

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Memories are Made of This

Beach holidays Frinton-on-Sea and North Cornwall 70

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John’s Cottage

The Grand Hotel Our Beach Hut

My mother sold John’s Cottage in the mid 1970s and had 2 modern houses built in the large garden. My sister Bridge inherited one of the new houses and continued the family tradition, taking her children there and inviting us to join them. Our days in Frinton consisted of swimming in the cold water! If we did so on a low tide, we had a long way to walk as the tides went out very far. High tides often covered the sand completely and, if the weather was windy, they washed up the concrete steps on to the concrete boardwalk in front of the beach huts. We built sandcastles and endless long channels in the sand to catch & drain the sea water. Shrimping with a net was another favoured activity. We cooked the shrimp in boiling water on an old-fashioned stove – I distinctly remember the salty fishy smell. We would walk to the beach down 1st Avenue, across the Greensward to our beach hut – number 99, I think. We would shelter in the Beach hut from the wind & rain. The Nannies boiled a kettle on a primus stove, and we ate sandwiches, which often got sand in them!

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Memories are Made of This

Paintings done on location in Burgandy Blackberrying was fun. We used a walking stick to pull down the long bramble branches. We played tennis on the famous grass courts at the Lawn Tennis Club, went to performances at Frinton Rep Theatre, and cinemas in Walton and Clacton. I seem to remember South Pacific and maybe new Bond films as they came out… I also recall visits to the Piers at both Clacton & Walton. We went on the Bumper Cars, Roller Coasters and the Ghost Train. One distinct memory is being taught how to make a reversed charges phone call from the Red Phone box at the bottom of 1st Avenue in case we got lost. On one occasion my father took us out to the Pirate Station Radio Caroline in his Boston Whaler flat bottom motorboat. I think we shouted out a request to be played.

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Beaches and waves - North Cornwall

We played Racing Demon and Monopoly and I also recall once making a circular skirt from a tablecloth. My last memory of Frinton-on-Sea is in about 1993, after which we started going to Cornwall, which inspired both my painting and fabric designs. I now realise these memories and experiences are the narrative that underpin my artwork. My artwork has a distinctly personal narrative, and I now appreciate these past experiences appear in my artwork frequently, if not always obviously. They can appear when I am on painting courses or when I am simply playing in my studio. Most recently they have been triggered by the arrival of Molly and I am intrigued to see what will appear next as I spend precious time with her and Sal, in France, and I explore and experiment.

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Seeing Guin

Jo & Guin, Istanbul late 1960s

We are friends for life. When we are together the years fall away. Isn’t that what matters? To have someone who can remember with you. To have someone who remembers how far you have come…? – Judy Blume I have been friends with Guin for 61 years. We met in the winter term of 1960 at our boarding school, Knighton House, near Blandford, Dorset. My earliest memory of her is struggling with her name, Guinevere, so I called her Guinea Pig; I had a pet Guinea pig called Pongo. When I asked her what she remembers of me at that time she remembers my homesickness and seeing me sobbing into my cereal. Guin has been a constant in my life and a role model. In the late 1960s Guin was living in Istanbul with her first husband. Another school friend and I made an intrepid trip to visit her which involved travelling out by plane and back by boat from Izmir to Brindisi, Italy where we hitched a lift in a tiny red sports car all the way back to Dover!

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Lone & Fran by the Trans-Siberian train mid 1970s At school Guin hadn’t been considered university material, nonetheless while living in Istanbul she learnt Turkish and went to university. When she returned to the UK she lived in my flat in London for a while. During this time I was a photographic stylist collecting props for photographic shoots and I also started LINEN HIRE, a business which hired fabric backgrounds for use in editorial and advertising sets. She was also a guest at my wedding to Angus in 1981, prior to which she composed this poem: Ones heavily into tablecloths and one is into wood Really some combination but they thought if they tried, they could They gathered their act together in Sussex and W2 And when they eventually made up their minds – well, points? They got a few There were one or two hectic moments in the hall at LINEN HIRE, When the wedding presents clashed with the clients. The scene was really dire. But Fran and Angus finally made it on ’81 January ten, That’s really a lucky number for swimming in the Norfolk fen. They’ll know when the honeymoon is over (they hear the Danish cry) When a quick one before dinner just means pouring a Martini dry…

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Seeing Guin Fran, Guin & Leo Getty Museum 1989

College graduation day 1998 Pennie, Greg & Fran - Florida 1968 In 1989 my mother & I travelled to Los Angeles. I stayed with Guin, her second husband and her young son. My mother stayed with her school friend Mimi, whom she’d met at school in Montreal in the 1930s. Later Guin and her family moved to Wales where they brought up their children. During this time Guin started studying horticulture and inspired by this I too ‘went back to school’ starting with the same course but moving on to ‘A Creative Approach to Textiles’ with the OCA and a City and Guilds course at The London Institute, which eventually led to me going to College. Meeting up with Guin recently, I have been reminded of the importance of friendship and our shared experiences over many years. Not only with Guin but also with other school friends, such as Pennie, from Herm in the Channel Islands, Lone and Annabel. After school Pennie and I went to Canada and America to visit friends and relatives. Lone came from Denmark to join our boarding school at Cranbourne Chase in 1967. In the early 1970s Lone and I travelled to Burma, Thailand, Singapore, Taiwan, and Japan, returning to Europe on the Trans-Siberian. Subsequently I have spent a lot of time with her and my ‘second family’ in Denmark. We’ve visited many exhibitions together including Matisse A Second Life at The Louisiana Museum and the Ordrupgaard Museum in Copenhagen. I met Annabel in 1968 through mutual friends in East Anglia. She now lives in France but whenever we meet, we easily pick up where we left off.

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Julie, Fran & Guin - London December 2019

Annabel & Fran 2018 There are many more friends I’ve made along the way. Not just at school but through friends of my family and through my children. Although I was older than most of my fellow students, another layer of friendships developed when I was at college, as well as through hosting lifedrawing classes at home, tutored by Francesca Clarke, and then attending many art courses at Emily Ball at Seawhites. When Guin was invited to a party in Lewes recently, it gave her the chance to meet people in real life that she’d been singing with over Zoom during the various Lockdowns. This also gave us an opportunity to meet up and reminisce. We walked and talked. Being a passionate gardener, she was interested in The Nuthurst Community Allotment which we’ve developed during Lockdown 2 and 3. It is on and around the previous Architectural Plant Nursery propagation greenhouse and outside area. Our daughter Sal, who she has known since she was born in 1985, was also here entertaining one of her school friends & her young son. This meeting was so wonderful and restorative after so long apart, not only from Guin, but people in general. We plan to meet up again in London to visit an exhibition, film, or theatre and/or all three. The last time we did that was December 2019 with another mutual schoolfriend whom we met at Cranbourne Chase. So many adventures and unexpected turns have come about because of my long friendship with Guin and others. It will be interesting to observe what this reconnecting leads to next and how it might emerge in my artwork…

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Travelling to Europe (During a Pandemic)

30 September, 2021 Eurotunnel Le Shuttle – bringing Europe closer since 1994

Things are never as bad as you think they are going to be. As I set out on my journey to visit my daughter in France, during a pandemic, the preparation seemed overwhelming. Too much. Embarking on “Le Shuttle” however reminded me of childhood, of storybooks – but more Harry Potter than Beatrix Potter. Heading south felt energising and uplifting. Moving closer toward family and friends, new experiences, new memories, places, and people to be discovered. My daughter, we call her Sal, and her partner bought a property in Burgundy in December 2020 & eventually moved there full-time in March 2021. I was keen to see this and help them set up their gîtes. We had “seen” the property on FaceTime, so I had an idea of the layout, but not where everything was in relation to each other. Once I started driving on the motorways, I realised I was re-igniting my “travel muscle”. I left the motorway at Beaune and was suddenly in the unspoilt countryside with small villages and vineyards as far as the eye could see. 25 minutes later I reached their village. St Sernin du Plain is perched high on a hilltop and their property has a fantastic view across the valley, toward vineyards, distant hills and villages.

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Hospice de Beaune

Watercolour by Fran of view from Gîte

Hospice de Beaune

During my stay, we visited a few of the local tourist spots. I found our visit to the Hospice de Beaune very moving – even more so as, a sign of the times, one of the rooms was being used as a vaccination centre for Beaune residents. I also drove to Vezelay, the site of a Cistercian Abbey on the hilltop which is part of a Pilgrims way. I met up with an English friend who has lived in France for 30 years. We also visited a market in Chagny and made two visits to Ikea in Dijon in four days; I wasn’t sure if I was in Croydon, Sweden, or France! It was fun to help with the preparation of the gîtes as it included visiting local DIY shops and supermarkets to source curtain poles, hairdryers and pressure cookers for the gîtes; things one might not necessarily do as a tourist. I was surprised however by the amount of work to do. I wielded a decorating paintbrush for the first time in years – so not in the studio for once. My son-in-law introduced me to a clever window cleaning trick involving washing up liquid and a squeegee. We upholstered a headboard using an up-cycled display curtain from my old shop and made bed valances without doing any sewing.

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Traveling to Europe... View from Gîte

Fran with her daughter at a wine tasting

Being with and working with my daughter was really enjoyable. She took me on an escorted wine tour in a 2CV and we went to the Roman style (but not old) amphitheatre in her village to hear chamber music. We also took the Couchoir wine trail in her village, visiting four makers including a lady whose wine is highly regarded. When I returned to the UK I was required to self-isolate, which was a perfect opportunity to tidy up my studio and sort through and pack away various old projects. It also gave me the opportunity to work on a submission for Artists into Europe using photographs I had taken on my trip and referencing my recent “Armchair traveller” studies.

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As an outcome of this trip, I have decided to blend my photography and drawing even more. It has opened my eyes to looking anew at all the travelling I have done in the past, maybe I’ll be able to incorporate past experiences with my newest ones. I can’t wait to go back, but I must be patient as I have an operation scheduled, plus the wider family activities need to be considered. I am looking forward to returning however very much and being more of a tourist. I would love to visit Cluny, a Matisse Gallery I saw signposted from the motorway, and a museum in Dijon. I would also like to travel further south to visit LUMA Arles, an experimental cultural centre with a tower designed by Frank Gehry which was inaugurated in June 2021.

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Lockdown JOURNAL 3

1. Becoming Fran - Frida 2. Becoming Fran - Gerhard Richter 3. Out of the Shadows 4. A Different Time 5. Importance of Purposeful Activity 6. Exhibitions I Haven’t Visited

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Introduction

The global pandemic and the subsequent lockdowns had a profound impact on all of our lives. In the first lockdown, in March 2020, personally I found myself, probably for the first time in my adult life, home alone and with no schedule or calendar of events to attend to drive my daily activity. I am a physically and mentally active person and I am used to keeping myself busy with my art and my family and friends, so this enforced period of isolation was at first very disconcerting. However, I soon found ways to occupy myself, and my skills and abilities in attending and joining in with activities online grew very quickly. A ‘new normal’ soon emerged, and with each subsequent lockdown, the “flavour” of this new experience evolved. This book reflects on these unexpected and unplanned for experiences; what I discovered about myself and upon reflection, what I enjoyed and what I missed.

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Becoming Fran

in Isolation with Frida Kahlo

“I paint self-portraits because I am so often alone,” - Frida Kahlo Artists exist primarily in isolation; It is a normal and necessary state in order to focus on creating. Enforced isolation, such as that we have been experiencing over the last few months however, is quite different as it is not a choice and therefore it feels quite different and we behave differently. During this episode of quarantine I have spent a lot of time alone. A time in which, in the normal course of events, I might have visited my mother in Norfolk, or my children and grandchildren; they may have visited me at home from London or Birmingham; I may have attended a course at Seawhites or maybe visited an exhibition in London….What I have done is none of these things. So what have I done instead?

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In Isolation with Frida Kahlo Inspiration

“Rise above the storm and you will find sunshine”

After the initial shock, I have found my inspiration has been flowing, much like the beautiful weather we experienced during the first weeks of isolation. I have spent many hours in my studios and outside. In the beginning I spent quite a lot of my energy tidying and organising, but this has now progressed on to creating, as my mindset has settled to the unlimited potential this period offers me. Lesley at Pure Arts Group recommended the #KentCreativeSocialJournal project on Facebook which I have found highly motivating and creatively stimulating. I have also continued with my regular #whilethekettleboils drawing a day, which I have been doing for sometime and enjoy – it gives me the chance to look for the empty spaces. I have also joined a Zoom art group with Rowena McWilliams at Smallhythe Studio and I have discovered the joy of drawing with scissors as part of a London drawing group activity. As part of my Women reading series I have also completed one ‘Becoming Fran’ self-portrait and started a second inspired by Frida Kahlo. Being in a book club has provided the perfect foil for gathering inspiration and source material for this series, which I have been developing over the last year or so. In April 2019 we met at Jo’s house to discuss Michelle Obama’s autobiography ‘Becoming’. I immediately realised the potential

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Photograph & studies for Becoming Fran


of our gathering and took lots of photographs of everyone holding their book, luckily Chris also took one of me. The intention at the time was to make portraits of each of us. I have used these photos as my starting point, working up each subject into sketches and studies using various media and backgrounds, finally ending up with 4 Artworks, each on 50cms square wooden boards, which suited the way I was drawing/painting/working at the time. At the same time I also started my own selfportrait, which I then put aside until now. The lockdown has proved the perfect inspiration to pick this up again. I re-visited Chris’s photo of me to distill all the potential information, once again working with graphite, oil pastels, acrylic and mixed media onto watercolour, shiny, beige, white paper & cardboard of different sizes, but all square. I had already prepared and started painting on a wooden board, which I had sized with Absorbent Ground when dry this gives the appearance of watercolour paper. Amongst these studies I even resorted to drawing directly onto the original photo with wax crayons, which was quite revelatory and helped me get back in.

Collage & other studies for Becoming Fran

An added impetus to me completing this first ‘Becoming Fran’ self-portrait was the intention to submit it, together with a 3 minute video, to the first ‘Grayson’s Art Club’ recently aired on Channel 4. As a consequence of this motivation and isolation, I am now back ‘in the flow’ of creating daily in

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In Isolation with Frida Kahlo

my studio and am excited to have started another self-portrait. This time inspired by a drawing I did at the V&A Frida Kahlo exhibition summer 2018. The sketch shows her reading her diary wearing a bow in her hair & lots of rings on her fingers. When we got back home Jane took several photos of me in this pose - lots of rings but no ribbon in my hair.

Self care

At times like these I truly appreciate more than ever that self-care and self-love is a priority and a necessity – not a luxury! Over the past weeks I have, like all of us, spent a lot of time on my own and in my own company and I have discovered some interesting and long hidden facts about myself, my values and motivation, which I had long forgotten, and I realise I actually quite like and appreciate my own company. Reconnecting to my values has been truly inspiring and I feel now an intuitive need to retain this solitude as part of my future practice; to make it part of my new normal ‘after the storm has passed’. I am blessed with being a creative and space and time to work on my passion.

Opportunity “In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.” - Albert Einstein

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Collage & other studies for Becoming Fran


Long walks

There are few joys in life that equal good conversation, a genuine laugh, a long walk, a friendly dance or a big hug and I truly appreciate all of these gifts now more than ever, from the isolated solitude of my own home.

Oil Pastels

I am very lucky to live in a beautiful part of the country, with a large established garden and this has been an absolute blessing over the last few weeks. It has provided me with the fortitude to remain positive and healthy both physically and mentally.

Attitude Serenity

“Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.”

Technology

We are so lucky to live in the age of technology. I have enjoyed the connectivity this has given me with friends and loved ones. I have also marvelled at the creativity of humanity to support each other through the ether with amazing and inspirational content including music, cooking, gardening, drawing, exercise…. I have even been doing my regular strengthening class via zoom.

Becoming Fran, final portrait

I have been joining in with the Pure Arts Group weekly live broadcasts – every Wednesday at 1pm – live streamed onto Facebook. They have provided a vital link to other artists and I am getting to know people all over again. I hope these continue in the new normal ‘after the storm has passed’.

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In Isolation with Frida Kahlo

Sketch done at Frida Kahlo exhibition, summer 2018

Ideas

Everything begins with an idea - a thought and a feeling which resonates.

Opening

“A new door cannot be opened until we have the courage to close the one behind…” Please shut the door – stay home and stay safe. Because I am very excited to discover the new normal that is starting to emerge

New habits

Making new habits takes effort. This time has shown me that the effort is worth it – I truly believe exciting times lie ahead for all of us if we stay strong, together, brave and kind. I look forward to meeting you all again ‘after the storm has passed’ in our new - hopefully lighter and brighter and significantly more creative – normal.

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Becoming Fran

in Isolation with Gerhard Richter

He sticks to a strict routine, waking at 6:15 every morning. He makes breakfast for his family, takes Ella to school at 7:20 and is in the studio by 8. At 1 o’clock, he crosses the garden from the studio back to the house. The grass in the garden is uncut. Richter proudly points this out, to show that even it is a matter of his choosing, not by chance. At 1 o’clock, he eats lunch in the dining room, alone. A housekeeper lays out the same meal for him each day: yogurt, tomatoes, bread, olive oil and chamomile tea. After lunch, Richter returns to his studio to work into the evening. ‘‘I have always been structured,’’ he explains. ‘‘What has changed is the proportions. Now it is eight hours of paperwork and one of painting.’’ He claims to waste time -- on the house, the garden -- although this is hard to believe. ‘ ’I go to the studio every day, but I don’t paint every day. I love playing with my architectural models. I love making plans. I could spend my life arranging things. Weeks go by, and I don’t paint until finally I can’t stand it any longer. I get fed up. I almost don’t want to talk about it, because I don’t want to become self-conscious about it, but perhaps I create these little crises as a kind of a secret strategy to push myself. It is a danger to wait around for an idea to occur to you. You have to find the idea.’’ As he talks, I notice a single drop of paint on the floor beneath one of his abstract pictures, the only thing out of place in the studio. - The New York Times Magazine January 27, 2002

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In Isolation with Gerhard Richter

Fran in her studio

Having had some time now in isolation to reflect on my daily routine, I realise that although things have changed hugely in the bigger picture, not much has changed in the actual daily rhythm of things in my world. What I really have benefitted from however, is the time and opportunity to really dwell and consider my choices.

My daily routine

In the mornings I like to meditate, which I think is an essential element supporting my overall sense of balance and wellbeing, especially now. A cup of tea and breakfast at kitchen table follow – strictly no iphone or ipad though. From there I traverse the day as the mood takes me or inspiration strikes. When not in Isolation, as well as the fundamental tasks associated with being a creative; painting, researching, business management, archiving and personal development, I may also visit family or friends, visit an exhibition or take a painting course. During this enforced period of quarantine I have made a conscious intention to establish a daily routine to give myself some structure and motivation, which is working well I’m pleased to say, and I am really getting good periods of artwork flow, which is very satisfying.

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In the weaving studio / boathouse

What I have found especially helpful is to connect to the memory of Seawhites Studio in some way. This then triggers all the subconscious memories of painting and creating there and motivates me to go in to the studio and create. Screen time can be a real problem as it triggers negative health issues, so I am trying very much to manage this and I leave my phone and ipad out of the studio as much as possible to minimise distractions. I am also trying to be disciplined with my interaction with social media. I am working to max 30 minute intervals, once or twice a day and I am setting a timer to enforce this new habit, as social media can be a massive distraction I find. Whole periods of time can disappear without me realising. Creating everyday is now my goal. Even if it’s just a watercolour sketch – often referenced from a photograph. I paint more than I do absolutely anything else – even before isolation. Winter is more looking at work, reflecting and resting whereas the summer sees more prolific output, as I can get outside, I can stand back and I can make a lot more mess!

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In Isolation with Gerhard Richter Fran at her loom

My summer painting studio is full of light. It is an uplifting space and one in which I play uplifting music to stimulate my senses and motivate my painting. It is in an orangery, so I feel a bit cut off from the house, which is a good thing because it minimises distractions, which is very useful. I tend to create during the daytime and do social media in the evening.

The impact of the seasons on my routine

On reflection, I seem to work to an academic timetable. Is it deeply ingrained remembered behaviour from school and bringing up children I wonder? I used to love half term holiday and the long summer holidays when I would get my children back as they were away at boarding school. The seasons do not impact on my travelling, which I do when the mood takes and an invitation beckons. One particular course I took in India; a textile mud resist and indigo dying course comes to mind now as I write these memories and feelings down. I enjoyed it immensely and it has informed much of my journey since… maybe time to consider another visit, when it’s safe to do so. 94

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Painting outside

Reflecting on routine and my personal experience, here are my top tips: • Avoid rigidity in the routine • Be flexible and adaptable - its part of the whole process • Be agile in your thoughts and behaviour – forgive yourself easily • Prioritise self care • Ask for help sometimes and with some tasks – but don’t be rigid • Be aware of your own tendencies – are you a perfectionist or a procrastinator… and how they might limit you • The best is good enough sic [for me] – saying from Admiral Jackie Fisher (my Great Grandfather) Fran White/May 2020 - Studio images courtesy of Caitlin Lock

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Out of the Shadows

Collage of bevelled shadows 16 December, 2020 Artists and scientists both think outside the box. They’ve got to come with genius experiments or ideas to expose the most interesting phenomena.

Cornelia Parker

As mentioned in my recent final reflections on lockdown blog, I have pursued a number of purposeful activities during lockdown, including an experimental project called ‘While the kettle boils’. I enjoyed that project so much that I have recently taken up a new experimental project observing and responding creatively to shadows. In the spirit of Cornelia Parker, I have found experimenting with the everyday and familiar garners the most interesting creative outcomes, and this motivates me to continue the journey

Fran’s memories sketched in 2014

further with no particular outcome in mind except creativity itself.

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Back in July of this year, Lesley Samms of Pure Arts Group encouraged me to take a break from the #Whilethekettleboils project, to give myself some time to reflect and to enjoy the summer with my family. She encouraged me to honour the quiet moments and to notice what I notice. During this period of quiet rest and reflection, I began to notice shadows popping up wherever I looked, especially in my immediate surrounds. These shadows captivated my imagination and I started recording them on my phone and then posting them on Instagram. I found the experience of looking and recording the shadows both immersive and compelling which are usually signs to me that I’m on to something! This period of quiet reflection also gave me the opportunity to look with fresh eyes at what I am surrounded by every day, and what I discovered, hidden in plain sight, was both magical and inspirational. One of the big bonuses of happening upon this new project has been in its adaptability. I can follow it whenever and wherever I am, so it is neither positively or negatively affected by the uncertainty or the times we are currently living through. During the summer/early autumn for example I recorded shadows at social events and when staying with my mother in Norfolk, and in more recent times when travel has been somewhat restricted, I have focused inward on my own home and immediate surroundings. As the Summer days have passed and we have gradually moved toward Autumn and then Winter, I have taken the many shadow

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Out of the Shadows

photographs I have now accumulated back into my studio and started experimenting and playing with the images – being open to whatever develops. I have experimented with photographing, drawing, painting, and collage. Recently I re-worked one of my new shadow paintings into different genres/ styles as suggested by the Pure Foundation Back to Basics course Module 2 – Making. I used previously worked canvases and painted over them, inspired by the styles of artists past, including Picasso and Frida Kahlo. This reworking of the canvas gives the completed pieces a pleasing richness and depth, and to my great delight, I have recently sold one of these experimental pieces to a fellow artist via the Hungry Artist Facebook Group. I intend to continue playing with this shadows project throughout the Winter months until the next inspiration appears and takes me on the next journey of discovery through experimentation…

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A Different Time

‘Keeping Time’ in a friends house

When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves” - Viktor Frankl Taking a look back over the past year I can now appreciate it has been quite surreal. Looking back reveals an unfolding of time and emotions one never could have imagined; a period of my life that has been both pleasant and painful, but not for the reasons I would have anticipated, had I the benefit of hindsight. Lockdown 1 gifted me the opportunity for peace and solitude. Time for both introspection and endeavour, within an environment that was both familiar and unknown in equal measure. My home had never just been my own, it was a place for family and friends to gather. A place where my children grew up and I developed and ran my Linen business. But for this briefest of times in the big picture, it cared and nurtured just me and I emerged refreshed and ready to take the next steps into my future. Invigorated and excited by the potential of being a full-time working artist.

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A Different Time

Lockdown 2 saw a completely different experience emerge. With family returning and a friend who lives alone becoming part of our bubble, normal service resumed; without thinking I fell back into my old patterns and habits of putting family first and providing meals and attention. This is fine for weekends and holiday time, but quite a different thing when everyone is at home all of the time! I now realise this time made me really consider the whole concept of the weekend and its purpose. I now appreciate the value in taking time to

Fran’s 70th lockdown birthday

decompress; to undertake mindless activity in order to rest and reset. Tasks such as ironing or sitting and listening for no other reason than you love and care for the people who are talking. I have recently bought Jay Shetty’s book, “Think like a Monk”, and I am finding much in the book resonates with my thoughts and feelings around this time and the notion of “the weekend” and its purpose. I was also shocked during this time to realise how much stuff I had accumulated over the years of running a business and being a part-time artist. Luckily

Shadow photograph

my daughter helped me with the clearing, tidying and sorting required to get on top of all of this. Lockdown 3 has been a time when the peace and solitude of lockdown 1 seems like a completely different lifetime; something that happened to someone I know – but not me – quite surreal. Which has made me truly appreciate the small things; the unexpected moments; the unknown and different…

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Charcoal drawing of shadows


No longer will I take anything for granted. I will seek to embrace the small moments and notice what I notice. I will listen and seek out quiet places and moments, so I can truly appreciate the bigger things when they happen. My art has benefitted enormously from all of these experiences - from the unexpected learning and growth. I am now in the final moments of closing down my Linen business. I have sold various pieces of kit and have been selling the last batches of linen. I

Shadows on linen blind

still need to clear more of the business records and files before I can let go, give it less attention and importance, but I am nearly there. It is no longer pivotal for me, it is becoming a very happy set of memories & experiences. I hope this will finally be completed by the summer and I look forward to the release; however, it is both liberating and unsettling, I didn’t realise how much it was part of me. I’m still a bit stuck in habitual rituals - sorting and recycling fabric scraps for re-use, maybe for painting on - not wasting!! I have also taken the opportunity during the lockdowns to pursue several art projects, some of which I have discussed in previous blogs. The most recent project has seen me explore shadows, which emerged during a period of reflection in summer 2020. I started posting photos on Instagram of chance encounters with shadows, created by both sun

Shadow paintings in Fran’s studio

and artificial light. These were taken mostly indoors but also noticed outside, often while walking.

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This project has really helped me appreciate the many gifts I am surrounded by; seeing and noticing familiar objects as if for the first time. I’m still stopped in my tracks by shadows! Although my photos have inspired several paintings, I realise a lot of them are actual finished artworks in themselves, so I am planning to make a book of my Instagram posts eventually. To support my aspirations of further developing my art career I have also undertaken the Pure Foundation Programme, which considers Mindset, Making, Management and Money. Completing the Mindset Module was really helpful. I found it uncomfortable investigating The Story of my Life however it was useful as in the end the importance of my artwork became cemented in my mind. I am almost at the end of the Making Module, this was significant as it got me back into my studio. I started making drawings, then paintings, of the bevelled shadows I’d been capturing on my phone, using different genres. I referred to my vast collection of art books as well as researching on the internet. Under the skills part I am loving knitting a scarf! I repurposed an unfinished project which I’d started about 9 years ago. During Lockdown 3 I have continued to meet with a group of artists on a Wednesday on zoom, organised by Rowena McWilliams of Smallhythe Studio. We have been exploring our current work, our methods, processes and any workshops we have been on. We also agree on a topic to work towards for the following week.

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When I was sorting a lot of previous studies in my studio, rather than chuck them I realised they had more to give so I’ve been repurposing many of them. This has become one of our weekly topics as well as leading into me joining #the100day project on Instagram. These meetings have helped me maintain focus, keep practising, provided helpful critique, sharing and caring. After lockdown ends we may even have an exhibition, who knows… As I highlighted earlier, I have also achieved a massive amount of clearing, tidying and sorting out of business paperwork and past artwork over the last few months. I’m now planning to catalogue more of my paintings on Artwork Archive. I really hope to receive my vaccination soon. This will afford me some liberty when we are allowed to move around freely again? I look forward very much to seeing our grandsons in real life and visiting my elderly mother is high on my list - also friends and maybe an Art Gallery or two! It is my 70th Birthday in March so I am looking forward to celebrating this on Zoom with a virtual tea party, followed by a real-life version in due course I hope. Reflecting on the last few months, I am extremely grateful for the freedom and opportunity I have had to be in my studio without the need to actually ‘do’ any particular duty, and all the shopping and meals cooked by everyone in our bubble. From now on I will always consider both the good & bad – better and worse - of every situation and I will value the realisation that I can just be me. There is no need to rush about searching. I can take responsibility for me, stop doubting and faffing about. Bring worrying to an end and live my own life - not others.

I am at home exactly where I’m meant to be. My word for 2021 therefore is Gratitude. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Think-Like-Monk-Train-Purpose/dp/0008386420

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Importance of Purposeful Activity

Final reflections on lockdown 2020: The importance of purposeful activity during unusual times.

Apparently Shakespeare wrote King Lear in isolation during the plague, so the precedent has been firmly set for the potential held within purposeful activity during such times. At the very least, we all need a reason to get up in the morning. Purposeful activity is widely recognised as helping us build our sense of self-worth, giving life satisfaction and meaning, and being vital to our sense of wellbeing. When lockdown happened I was very aware of my personal need to establish a range of purposeful activity and routines to support me through this very difficult time. Two key purposeful activities I pursued during this time were the Kent Creative Social Journal project, which I mentioned in a previous post, recommended to me by Lesley Samms of Pure Arts Group, and a project called ‘while the kettle boils’. The Kent Creative Social Journal project gave me the chance to focus on something new. It entailed making an Art Journal and then posting on Facebook. I really enjoyed the creativity and freedom the journal enabled, however, I found the posting on Facebook element slightly invasive and distracting.

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Overall though this project provided a fabulous opportunity to workout my feelings very randomly. I was anxious about starting something which had its’ own rules and regulations about what to post. This held me back a bit in the beginning, but I was fine once I’d committed. It was great to meet Nathalie Banaigs, who had initiated this idea, on a Pure Crowdcast interview with Pure Founder Lesley Samms and on the regular Kent Creatives zoom meetings, which greatly widened my circle of art world contacts. I first happened upon the “while the kettle boils” idea in mid March. I noticed a comment by artist Simon Carter in an Emily Ball newsletter. She had asked her tutors to make suggestions to help her students deal with lockdown. Simon’s suggestion was to ‘make a drawing in the time it takes the kettle to boil. Don’t be tentative, hold whatever you are drawing with in your fist, press really hard, slowly draw all the shapes around the kettle’ - I took this literally! I found a half-used sketchbook and made a daily pencil drawing, across 2 pages, of our kettle in the exact time it took to boil. On 24th March I started posting a daily drawing on Instagram titled #whilethekettleboils effectively creating the project myself and making a commitment to myself to post daily. I really enjoyed this project because it had a formulae; a set of self made rules to focus on which created a ritual and a mini routine to my day, which really helped me through lockdown, as it gave me a daily exercise to which I became, almost unreasonably, obsessed. It provided me with an

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excuse to do art everyday, not necessarily to paint, but certainly to play. I really enjoyed the process of responding to what was in front of me, however, sometimes it was hard to ‘repeat’ the ‘same’ view. Nevertheless I pushed myself on. In doing so I was encouraged by comments made about my posts by my followers, and others, on Instagram and Facebook. On reflection, I found the project ‘gave me permission’ to go into my studio, and this became the longest period of working in my studio ever! I used all sorts of media - pencil, crayon, watercolour, pastels, acrylic - that I already had, no need to rush out and buy more. On Easter Monday Anastasia Witts of Artist Digital gave me some free marketing advice on Zoom. She commented on how monochrome my Instagram Wall was and encouraged me to include colour. From that moment on I started to draw with pencil and then colour in later with whatever I could lay my hands on! Thanks to a Facebook memory I was also reminded of a visit I’d made to a Geta Bratescu exhibition, at Hauser & Wirth’s Saville Row Gallery, a year earlier. I had photographed her quote: “For me, drawing is a necessity. Whatever life’s everyday condition might be, I draw, I freely compose; it is like a musical exercise. For many years, I have also drawn with scissors, cutting out the materials required for collages. I sometimes draw with my eyes alone, picking out pieces from the heaps of textiles and paper scraps”

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#whilethekettleboils This quote motivated me to try this in front of the kettle. I found it inspirational. I employed scissors to cut into coloured and/or pre-painted and/or textured papers, as well as magazines. I then moved on to acetate templates, oil pastel rubbings on discarded box lids etc. I could take longer than it took for the kettle to boil; I re-purposed earlier investigations later and, eventually, only worked in the studio - nowhere near the kettle!! The most amazing outcome of these two projects is that I now have a new body of work based around boiling kettles comprising 3 sketchbooks, countless drawings, rubbings, collages, plaster applied to previous paintings. Some of these have fed into the ‘Discarded Teabags’ Exhibition at Smallhythe Studio, Tenterden, Kent. From The Kent Creative Social Journal I have 2 Art Journals created from cut and sewn and/or folded up-cycled A1 painting studies. I’ve also learnt quite a bit about kettles. Our original white one broke mid April, luckily we had a spare hiding in our larder. This was a more curvaceous chrome one, the shape was more fun to record, however the ‘kettle lead’ was broken so we used a white ‘kettle lead’ from an old Mac computer to get it to boil. This looked weird but added to my story, as the lead was hard to remove so we used a tall glass jug to fill the kettle - something else for the kettle to relate to in my sketches. As lockdown eased I purchased a new kettle - I managed to break its’ lid twice and resorted to using an old fashioned camping kettle which we heated on the gas hob. Eventually I bought an all singing and dancing replacement, which has a temperate adjustment, lights, sounds the lot!

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Importance of Purposeful Activity During this time I also drew a friend’s kettle and the one in a holiday home - in all recording 6 different kettles. Now that lockdown has eased I am spending my time cataloguing, numbering and naming all of my kettles work, I did my final sketch on 15th July, and put them up on Artwork Archive.

Reflections…

I realise on reflection, these projects have initiated new ways of working for me; looking and reflecting. They have also motivated me to use what I already have at hand. During lockdown my creativity knew no bounds - I up-cycled old canvases, used cardboard, when I ran out of tracing paper, I grabbed the dress-making pattern paper - etc. To quote Anselm Kiefer in an article written by Oliver Moody in The Times newspaper, on 9th September - ‘Lockdown was a blessing for me. I worked more than ever.’

#drawingwithscissors

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Fran in her studio with Lockdown and Kettle artwork

The Future…

From time to time in the future I plan to start an art journal, as I recognise the purpose & joy this project gave me during a very difficult time. I am also delighted that I have had the opportunity to exhibit some of my kettles at Smallhythe as mentioned earlier, and I believe there are plans to have a Kent Creative Social Journal Exhibition as well, at some point which will be exciting But for now I am tidying my studio - working out my new routines, planning another body of work around my recent #morningshadows Instagram posts. I also plan to complete my #womenwhoreads body of work and complete the foundation Back to Basics course with Lesley Samms of Pure Arts Group.

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All the Exhibitions I Haven’t Visited

Jane Grinling in front of her ‘Coat’ painting at RA delayed Summer Exhibition All the exhibitions I haven’t visited in the last 2 years... The last 2 years have really been quite exceptional in so many ways. Some dark and difficult days; some truly exceptional and wonderful. Many days experienced alone or just with very close family – times to truly cherish – times to count my blessings. I really love visiting exhibitions. It gives me immense pleasure and provides me with endless inspiration. Over the past 2 years this is one of the things that I have really missed. Specifically, I have missed (to mention but a few that I can remember!): Dubuffet at the Barbican. Eileen Agar at Whitechapel Gallery. Michael Armitage at The Royal Academy which I would have loved to see, especially his paintings on bark. Drawing Project UK, Newlands Gallery - Descendant’s series. Luis Chillda son of Eduardo Chillida (a great favourite of mine). Helen Frankenthaler at Gagosian in London. Lisa Brice & Nina Hamnet at Charleston Trust…. I also missed the opportunity to visit Charleston: the Bloomsbury Muse exhibition at Phillip Mould Gallery in Pall Mall with members of Pure in November and a couple of painting classes at Seawhites, both of which I was so looking forward to.

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JFJ outing to Lynette Yiadem-Boakye at Tate Britain My absence from these was due both to Covid and my need for an operation, which was ultimately postponed until 2022. In the autumn I thought I knew what was in my diary with the operation planned for late September. However, I was practically on the operating table when I was notified that my Blood Platelet count was too low. Over several weeks, turning to months, I had a Bone Marrow test as well as a stomach scan. Eventually in mid-November the haematologist gave me the all clear for the procedure to go ahead, at which point I caught Covid! It just goes to show that the best laid plans and all that……lots of patience and acceptance has been practised during all of this. I did manage to see some exhibitions between lockdowns however, including:

RA Summer Exhibition

In October 2020 I drove my friend Jane Grinling and myself to the delayed RA Summer Exhibition to see her artwork in situ, together with the work of our mutual friend Juliet. They looked magnificent amongst all the other selected works.

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‘Discarded Teabags’ exhibition at Smallhythe Gallery Visiting the RA was quite stressful, however. The the traffic was dreadful. I had trouble getting my members card out of my wallet and all the time we were wearing a mask! We also had to sign in with the Covid Track & Trace at most places we visited. Despite this we forged on and visited the Barnett Freedman exhibition at Pallant House Gallery, and while there we looked at their permanent collection, which I loved. I was inspired by a Prunella Clough Etching ‘Shadow Play 10’ and ‘The Open Door’ by John Armstrong, who was a theatre designer which informed his Surrealist paintings. I visited The Beauport Gallery, Bannatyne Spa Hotel, in October 2021 to see the Material Nature exhibition featuring my own artwork which was very pleasing. During the three lockdowns I also joined the Smallhythe Artists Zoom meetings, initiated by Rowena McWilliams. She held two group exhibitions at her Gallery showing work we’d made in response to our weekly themes - ’Discarded Teabags’ October 2020 & ‘Muchness’ May 2021. Looking back, past exhibitions I visited pre covid that have stayed with me as strong memories, and influences include:

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A ‘Craftspace’ & ‘Outside In’ national touring exhibition which showed amazing outsider art under the headings: - Historical Work, Cultural Roots, Intuitive Textiles & Radical Missions. My friend Andy & I were there to see another exhibition, not expecting this wonderful show as a bonus.

‘Muchness’ exhibition

Paula Rego in Milton Keynes August 2019

I was amazed that most of her huge paintings were created with pastel. I’d applied for the MK Open competition, and I wanted to check out their Gallery and get a feel for Milton Keynes the new town, which had always fascinated me. I drove there on my way to stay with my daughter in Birmingham.

John Walker at IKON Gallery

Ikon Gallery

Lots of exhibitions at the Ikon Gallery in Birmingham which was just around the corner from my daughter Sal’s flat. A very moving and emotional series of etchings by Käthe Kollwitz in 2017 and New Paintings by John Walker in February 2020 just before the lockdown. Reflecting now on these past, missed and snatched experiences I realise I really appreciate and benefit from time out to wander, to look and just absorb stuff that visiting exhibitions in real life offers. Something you can’t really achieve by viewing online.

Paula Rego at Milton Keynes Gallery

Looking forward, now we can visit exhibitions again, I am really looking forward to visiting Lubaina Himid at Tate Modern, ‘Sirens: Sophie

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Radical Craft Exhibition

Shadow Play by Prunella Clough

von Hellerman & Anne Ryan’ at Turner Contemporary and The Courtauld Gallery to see The Karshan Collection of experimental drawing which they’ve received as a recent bequest. I love spending time on my own, so will likely visit a few of these exhibitions on my own as well as with friends. Having exhibited together in Ditchling as JFJ [JaneFranJuliet] we often plan JFJ outings - anything from the Venice Biennale in 2017 to our most recent outing to the Lynette Yiadom-Boakye at Tate Britain in May 2021.

So much to experience and see, to absorb and be…. Edited Jan 2022

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