Wedding Planner, January 2012

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Wedding

PLANNER 2012

What’s Inside: •

Creating the Perfect Celebration

•

Debt Free Weddings

•

Engagement Photos that Capture Your Love

Published by the Lewiston Tribune and Moscow-Pullman Daily News

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Wedding Planner / January 2012

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ADVERTISERS Palouse Mall .................................................. Page 2 Diamond Shop ............................................... Page 3 Happy Day Catering & Event Rental ............ Page 5 Headmaster’s School of Hair Design.............. Page 6 Sam Dial Jewelers . ........................................ Page 7 Hahn Event Rentals ....................................... Page 8 Printcraft Printing............................................ Page 9 Bridal Fair ......................................................Page 10 Quality Inn & Suites.......................................Page 11 Stillings & Embry Florist . .............................Page 12 Fuchs Flower & Garden Center......................Page 13 Macullen’s Steak House . ...............................Page 14 Best Western Lodge at River’s Edge .............Page 14 Pepperland Music ..........................................Page 15 Jean Marie Photography ................................Page 15 Pistol Palace ...................................................Page 16 Bargain Hunter Mall ......................................Page 16 Limo Tyme . ...................................................Page 17 The Pampered Chef .......................................Page 17 Rosauers Supermarkets . ................................Page 18 Wayback Cafe & Catering .............................Page 18 Rosie’s Ribs ...................................................Page 19 Redneck Wine Glasses . .................................Page 19 Johnson’s Jewelry ..........................................Page 20 Cole’s Jewelers ..............................................Page 21 Old Post Office Floral & Tea House...............Page 21 Bell Tower . ....................................................Page 22 Bridal Path .....................................................Page 23 Courtyard Weddings ......................................Page 24 Romantic Getaways .......................................Page 25 Red Lion Hotel ..............................................Page 26 Lindt Chocolate/Judith Gara...........................Page 27 Best Western-University Inn ..........................Page 27 Red Barn Farms .............................................Page 31 Moments in Time Studio ...............................Page 31 SEL Event Center ..........................................Page 32

CONTENT Debt free wedding . ................................. Page 6 Engagement photos . ............................... Page 7 Making your invitations . ........................ Page 8 Floral terms ............................................. Page 9 First dance . ............................................. Page 9 Do it yourself ......................................... Page 10 Wedding cakes ....................................... Page 11 Wedding glossary . ................................. Page 11 Wedding video ....................................... Page 12 Choosing your colors ............................. Page 13 Unique touches ...................................... Page 14 Origins of wedding traditions ................ Page 15 Honeymoon origin ................................. Page 15 Reception foods ..................................... Page 16 Trends in wedding gowns ...................... Page 17 Themes can bring fun to wedding . ........ Page 18 Trying on gowns .................................... Page 19 Tips for celebrations .............................. Page 20 Overnight guest accommodations . ........ Page 21 Having a happy marriage ....................... Page 22 Pregnant bridesmaid .............................. Page 23 Packing for the honeymoon ................... Page 24 Wedding-night jitters ............................. Page 24 Registering for gifts ............................... Page 25 Wedding registry etiquette ..................... Page 27 Engagement announcement form .......... Page 28 Wedding announcement form ................ Page 29 Foods you shouldn’t serve ..................... Page 31

On the cover: Cody and Korrie Vaughan Cover design: Anne Cermak, advertising design supervisor Advertising coordinator: Cheri McCollum, advertising representative Page layout: Peggy Hayden, Target Publications coordinator 4

Wedding Planner / January 2012

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Start your married life free of wedding debt ARA

The average wedding now costs more than $25,000, multiple studies show. Few couples starting their lives together have that kind of cash, and many will fund their weddings — wholly or in part — with credit. While it’s normal to want the wedding of your dreams, your special day shouldn’t lead to years of unmanageable debt. Money problems, including too much debt, can cause significant disharmony in a marriage and can even lead to divorce. Fortunately, some careful budgeting and smart use of credit can help you prevent wedding-induced money problems from interfering with your marital bliss. As soon as you set a wedding date, you need to begin thinking about and discussing how you’ll pay for your big day. Your conversation should encompass several key financial talking points, including: Credit ­ — Discuss candidly how you’ve both used it in the past, how you’ll use it going forward and what, if any, role credit will play in funding your wedding. If you haven’t already done it, ex-

Photo courtesy of Jean Marie Photography change your credit scores, and discuss how you both arrived at your respective credit statuses. Consider enrolling together in a credit monitoring product. Keeping a close eye on your credit leading up to marriage may help you better understand if and how you should use credit in funding

your wedding. Websites like Freecreditscore.com allow you to see your credit score, which is a snapshot of your credit. The site’s Credit Score Center can help you understand how your score works, how it’s calculated, what factors impact it and when is the best time to apply for credit. Budgeting — A budget will be key to financial security throughout your married life. Establishing and sticking to a budget for your wedding is not only a good way to avoid overspending, it’s a good teambuilding exercise for future spouses. You can learn a lot about each other based on how you manage your wedding-planning budget. Savings — Saving money is often an exercise in compromise. For example, you may want a new car, but to save money you may buy a slightly used one instead of a current model. Saving money on wedding costs is the same. You’ll need to look for creative ways to save money. Many people find it difficult to reconcile the idea of financial matters and romance. But don’t underestimate the romantic appeal of starting out your life together free of wedding debt.

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Wedding Planner / January 2012

Photo courtesy of Ridinger’s The Art of Photography Dress and Veil - The Bridal Path Hair and Makeup - Kami Brown

Engagement photos that capture your love l Choose your location wisely. Certain locations will stand out in your minds because they are visually stunning or are special places where you have spent moments as a couple. By choosing a place that offers a personal connection, there’s a good chance you’ll appreciate the photos in the long run. Also, be open to the fact that unplanned stops may offer a great background for the image. Be open to the unexpected.

Metro

Newly engaged couples choose to capture the occasion in photos that they can cherish. Often, one of these photos is used as an announcement to family and friends, and might even be published in the newspaper. Engagement photos may be part of a package negotiated with the photographer who will be covering the wedding day. Some couples enlist the help of a friend or a budding photographer to capture an engagement shot. The average cost of engagement photos can range from $200 to $500. Some couples opt to use a photographer who might specialize in other areas (i.e. fashion models) but may want to break into the wedding biz because of how lucrative it can be. Costs may be negotiated as a result. When shopping around for a photographer, there are certain things couples should keep in mind. The first and most important is selecting a photographer you can relate to. If you don’t feel a connection with the photographer, he or she will have trouble coaxing the shots that will produce the best results. He or she should also be a professional and have some experience working with posing couples. This way the photos don’t look stiff or contrived. Here are some other tips that can lead to great photos.

Photo courtsey of Jean Marie Photography

l Find a photographer who fits your style. If you’re a quirky couple, go with a quirky photographer. If you’re reserved and a followthe-book type of couple, then select a more traditional photographer. Some photographers out there forget that this is your moment and want to impart their idea of what you want. Make sure he or she takes your ideas into consideration.

l Select one who is open to different shoot locations and brainstorming. Some of the best photos occur in natural settings, where things aren’t entirely planned. If a photographer simply works out of a studio, you may want to select one who has more free reign with different locations to take pictures.

l Try random poses and some candid shots. Although you might have a vision of the perfect photo in your mind, experimenting with different ideas can sometimes lead to a great photo you really love. Expect to take your share of kissing, nose-touching and portrait shots. But some fun poses, such as running or jumping (or rolling around on a beach full of waves) can produce candid shots that are truly masterpieces. Remember, sometimes photographers will pose you in positions that seem a bit awkward, but this is to get the best lines of the body and flattering images. l Choose clothing that fits the mood. If time and budget allows, have several different wardrobe changes so that you can see which outfits work and which ones don’t. A formal outfit, comfortable street clothes, something beachy or clothing that fits with your interests (such as polo or baseball) can make for interesting engagement photos. Avoid clothing that is too trendy or busy, which may take away from the actual images in the long run. Plus, you don’t want to look back at these photos in the future and say, “What was I thinking?” Avoid matchy-matchy, though. If you are dressed alike, you may appear to be trying too hard. It’s the individual personalities you want to shine through.

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Making your own invitations can save $$$ Metro

Cost-conscious couples today seek different ways they can reduce expenses on their weddings. Do-it-yourself weddings have grown in popularity, and creating personalized wedding invitations is one way to save money and dream up something special. Wedding invitations can range in prices depending on the service used. Many brick-and-mortar printing companies have gone by the wayside, and online printing sources have replaced them. The reduced overhead means that many online retailers can produce wedding invitations at a lower cost than in years past. That doesn’t mean they are cheap, however. Couples can expect to pay anywhere from $150 to $500 on invitations depending on style and quantity, according to estimates from many printing company websites. Expect to pay around $90 for postage if mailing 100 standard invitations that do not require extra postage and include stamped response cards. In order to avoid overpaying for wedding invitations, or simply to create a personalized invitation, many couples are opting to go the do-ityourself route. DIY invitations are even more common thanks to the popularity of scrapbooking and papercrafting. Although people may have different standards in terms of quality for their invitations, it’s important to realize the invitation is the first thing guests often see concerning the wedding, and they will help set the tone of the upcoming nuptials.

Photo courtesy of Jean Marie Photography

Today there are many options when it comes to making invitations oneself. Couples can be as hands-on or hands-off as they like. Here are some choices to consider. l Design it yourself, but hire a printer. Couples can visit websites that enable them to choose paper type, ink color, a certain template, wording, color scheme, embellishments, dyecutting and many other options. Then the couple sits back and waits for the invites to come in the mail where they are put together before being sent out. These may be the most expensive of the DIY invites because a printer is still doing much of the work. l Use wedding invitation kits. Many stationery shops, craft stores

Relax

and office supply retailers offer allin-one kits that can be purchased. These feature a standard design with the accoutrements of that particular design. Most will come with envelopes and small response cards. The couple simply uses the template provided to create text on a personal computer and then the invite can be run through a home printer. l Mix and match components. Couples who want to be a little more hands-on can purchase card stock and envelopes separately and design their own invitations according to color scheme. Clip art included with some word processing or design software can embellish invites that are then printed on a home printer. Ribbon can be add-

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ed by punching holes into the invite and threading the ribbon through. l Do it all yourself. The truly crafty couple can make their invitations from scratch. This involves drawing out a template, cutting the card stock to fit, selecting envelopes, creating and executing response cards, and decorating the invitations as they see fit. This will require some tools, including scrapbooking or papercrafting supplies. A paper trimmer will help ensure straight cuts, and decorative-edged scissors can help hide any small mistakes in the edges. While this may be a cheaper option if couples get good prices on all the paper components, it also entails the most work and the greatest margin of error.

Floral terms every bride should know

Song ideas for your first dance

Metro

Before discussing table settings for their weddings, many couples find it helpful to brush up on some floral terminology before visiting florists. These florist terms that can be advantageous to know. l Biedermeier: A nosegay arranged tightly with concentric circles of differently colored flowers. The flowers are wired into a holder with only one type of flower in each ring. l Crescent: One full flower Photo courtesy of Jean Marie Photography and a flowering stem wired together to form a slender handle that is held in one hand. l Garden: A centerpiece featuring wildflowers. l Nosegay: Small, round bouquets composed of densely packed round flowers and fill. l Oasis: Specialized foam that is used in bouquet holders and centerpieces to retain water and keep blooms fresh. l Pomander: A flower-covered ball that is suspended from a ribbon. It is often carried by child attendants. l Posies: Smaller than nosegays but similar in design. l Presentation: A bunch of long-stemmed flowers cradled in the bride’s arms. It’s sometimes known as a pageant bouquet. l Topiary: Flowers trimmed into geometric shapes.

INVITATIONS Classic

Colorful

If Michael Buble or Nat King Cole aren’t on your playlists, chances are you may be looking for a first-dance song that’s a little less traditional for your wedding reception. Couples considering a song that’s a little different and speaks to them but won’t necessarily offend the wedding purists in attendance, might want to consider the following tunes: l “All I Want is You� (U2) l “Amazing� (Aerosmith) l “Crash� (Dave Matthews Band) l “Crazy for You� (Adele) l “Faster� (Matt Nathanson) l “For You I Will� (Monica) l “Here Without You� (3 Doors Down) l “Kiss Me� (Sixpence None the Richer) l “I’ll Stand by You� (The Pretenders) l “Love Song� (The Cure) l “No One� (Alicia Keys) l “Suga Suga� (Baby Bash) l “Without You� (Rent Soundtrack)

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Do-it-yourself weddings take organization METRO

Those thinking about tying the knot in the months to come may be discouraged by how expensive weddings can be. But with a little ingenuity and a hands-on approach, couples can have a wedding that is inexpensive and memorable at the same time. According to CostofWedding.com, on average, U.S. couples spend $26,542 for their weddings. Weddingbells magazine states that the average cost for a wedding in Canada is $23,330, up from $20,129 in 2010. These amounts do not include the cost for an engagement ring or wedding bands. With such a high price tag, some couples may wonder if they can afford their dream wedding or if there are ways to cut costs. Having a backyard, DIY wedding can be the answer. Although some may envision a backyard wedding with picnic benches and Dad at the grill, it can be a much classier affair than that. Smart couples are realizing that the money they would normally spend on a big wedding at an outside venue can be put to better use, either through buying a new home or fixing up one they may already own. Furthermore, for couples who are picky about details, having a DIY event ensures that they can control the details and have them as personal as they would like. Getting Started: A DIY wedding is one that will take much more work than simply hiring vendors and leaving the details to them. But the money saved with sweat equity can be substantial. A well-planned wedding is the best start. Grab a notebook and start making lists of all the things you will need — venue, food, invitations, etc. Work in advance: Many items necessary for a wedding can be bought in advance. Some couples find that purchasing low-cost items at discount stores turns out to be less expensive

than renting. For example, inexpensive glasses and silverware can be bought at dollar stores or chains like Ikea. Later on these items can be kept, sold or even donated to shelters. Tablecloths don’t have to be the traditional kind. It may be less expensive to purchase pieces of fabric from a fabric store and dressing them up oneself. Candles can be stockpiled relatively easy and provide a very affordable means of ambient light. Plan out centerpiece ideas and figure out which components can

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be bought and stored. Then items can be assembled at leisure. Wedding stationery is one thing that will have to be bought well in advance so there will be time enough to print out and mail save-the-dates, invitations and response cards. An informal wedding may mean couples can get simple attire. Buying off the rack may mean a smaller price tag for gowns. Gentleman may be able to fare with sportcoats and slacks. Purchase wardrobe essentials several months in advance to be sure there will be time for alterations, if necessary. Enlist the help of family and friends to get many of the tasks completed. Upon asking, many couples find there are members of the family who have skills in certain areas, which can be tapped for the wedding. There may be a gourmet chef, a disc jockey, a photographer or even someone who can officiate the vows. Having these people on board means a great reduction in costs. Readying the venue: Because couples will be doing the work themselves, it’s best to start several days in advance of the wedding (weather permitting). Be sure the grounds are well groomed and landscaped. Ensure there are no tripping hazards and that there is a sturdy surface for placing tables or creating a dance floor. It may pay to ask an electrician or someone who dabbles in electric work to help string some lights to better illuminate the area, especially for when the sun goes down. Set up the tables and chairs to finalize placement the day before. Figure out where the ceremony will take place. A small arbor can mark the area and make a nice photo backdrop. Dress the tables with linens and settings the morning of the wedding. A DIY wedding can be a fun, memorable event that costs a couple a fraction of what it would to have everything done for you.

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Let them eat cake that wows Metro

The tiered cake is a favorite wedding tradition that’s often presented at the end of the night. The happy couple takes a slice and enjoys the first piece. In recent years, wedding cakes have become more of an artistic centerpiece than just a confectionery treat. The average couple will spend between $700 to $800 for their wedding cake. Although many catering halls or reception sites will include the wedding cake in a package deal, many couples choose to order their cake from a specialty bakery who creates culinary masterpieces. If television trends are any indication, many people are opting to spend several hundred to thousands of dollars on a customized wedding cake. These fondant and buttercream creations may be elaborate in nature — so much so they’ll likely need to be ordered several months in advance.

Couples looking for something a bit different for their upcoming nuptials, many want to consider these trends in wedding cakes. l 3-D accents on the cake, such as graphic appliques. l A black-and-white motif that gives the cake a simplistic, yet trendy appeal. l A lot of bold color in the cake, instead of just white or ivory. l Dramatic monograms that can add class to the cake. l Painted cakes with edible food coloring paint that feature beautiful landscapes or a portrait. A work of art, they’re both delicious to eat and fun to admire. l Cakes that mirror the style of the wedding gown, including fondant ruffles and appliques. Many couples still opt for the traditional, and that is always in style, instead of experimenting with the outside of the cake, couples can be creative with cake flavors and fillings.

Wedding Glossary Planning a wedding? There are certain terms that every bride and groom should learn so they can be more informed in the process. Ascot: A wide, formal tie generally reserved for formal daytime weddings. Bodice: Close, upper-fitting part of the dress. Cathedral train: Train, or long piece of fabric that extends 6 1/2 to 7 1/2 feet from the waist. Cornelli: Decorative form of icing that resembles lacework on wedding cakes. Cutaway jacket: Jacket which tapers from the front waist button to a long, wide back tail; accessories include a wing-collar shirt with an ascot and a coordinating vest. Ganache: Rich chocolate filling or topping made from chocolate and heavy cream. Girdle: The outer edge or the widest part of the diamond forming a band around the stone. Illusion: Fine netting used for veils, headpieces, and on the sleeves and necklines of dresses. Inclusion: An internal imperfection on a diamond. Tea Length: Length of dress or skirt that falls several inches above the ankles.

Wedding Planner / January 2012

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Wedding video can enhance your special day Metro

In a financial climate where most people are pinching pennies, it comes as no surprise that many engaged couples seek ways to cut costs with regard to their weddings. Some couples are undecided whether certain components of their wedding are necessary. The decision to hire a videographer is one such area couples fret over. After all, with a photographer snapping hundreds of pictures, having a video may seem like an unnecessary luxury. However, people often find that having a wedding video to cherish long after the day has passed is well worth the price. There are several advantages to hiring a professional videographer to capture the day. A professionally produced wedding video is not the same as Uncle Fred carrying around his archaic camcorder and catching a few embarrassing dance moves during the reception. A professional video will showcase all moments of the wedding from perspectives not easily captured by photography. In addition to showcasing the images of the wedding, the video will also share the sounds and emotions of the day. Here are some things to think about. l Choose a videographer who will work in conjunction with the wedding mood and parameters. You probably don’t want a videographer who uses bright lights that can be distracting. Nor do you want a videographer who pushes

the camera in guests’ faces for a less-than-candid interview. Today’s professionals are inconspicuous and simply record the events as they unfold. l The videographer often works in tandem with the photographer. Some photographers have a videographer on staff. But it is fine to bring

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in your own if you like the quality of the photographer’s photos but not the videographer’s work. l A videographer will capture the things you may have missed during the busy day. He or she can serve as the eyes and ears for the things you’re not seeing and hearing. l Although ours is an increasingly digital world where people capture photos and videos on their smartphones and other devices on a regular basis, a wedding video can serve as a family memento. What other time, apart from the holidays, do you have all of your friends and loved ones together in one place? lAlthough no one wants to think of a friend or relative passing away while planning their wedding, the fact remains that after a few years some of the people who attended your wedding may no longer be around. Having a wedding video may be the only last moving image and sound of a special person who is no longer in your life. l Sound is a portion of the wedding that photos simply cannot capture. To relive the music and the words of the day, a vid-

eographer is a necessity. Professionals who use wireless microphones will produce a video with the best sound quality. l You can work with a good videographer so it’s not simply a video with close-up shots of your face or unflattering perspectives. Talk about your preferences and even fears about being filmed (some people just don’t like watching themselves on TV), and the videographer can no doubt find solutions that will accommodate your needs. l There are many things that you will not see at the wedding but may have liked to, such as the first gasps of wonder upon guests walking into the reception room, or the tears on the face of an aunt who was sitting too far back in the church pews. This is where a wedding video can prove invaluable. l Modern videographers offer high-resolution, edited movies. These can be delivered via BluRay or DVD and ensure the best quality for your packge. Although brides and grooms may be cutting costs with regard to their wedding, they may not want to pass on the wedding video.

Color your wedding - starting with the attire Metro

Bridesmaids are an important part of the wedding party, and most brides opt to have a handful of close friends and family members play a special role in the wedding. Choosing a gown and a color that will flatter all of the bridesmaids typically takes a little work. An overwhelming majority of couples choose to have a formal wedding. The average number of bridesmaids for these formal weddings is four. Considering around two million weddings take place in North America every year, that’s a lot of bridesmaids for whom gowns and other attire must be planned. Many bridesmaids worry about the gowns they will wear come the big day. Horrible bridesmaid dresses have been the butt of jokes for years, and many people have their own stories of garish gowns they’ve been asked to don for a wedding. Some have said that brides intentionally choose ugly gowns for their bridesmaids to ensure they’re not outshined come the wedding day. Although this may be the case for some, most brides aspire to select gowns that will be flattering for all. The color scheme is integral in the choice of gown. Every well-planned wedding carries a color scheme throughout. This includes the color a bride selects for her bridesmaids to wear. But not every color ac-

centuates everyone’s features. Therefore, some experimentation might be necessary to find a color that is flattering to all and fits with the color scheme. Depending on hair color and skin shade, there are many flattering hues available for gowns. When making this decision, consider bridesmaids’ ethnicity and skin tone.

African-American: Women with dark skin and hair may really shine in jewel-colored gowns, including silver, gold, purple and salmon. Very pale colors may be daring and conspicuous. Asian and olive-skinned women: Those with a slight yellow tone to their skin will look good in many colors, including

red, navy, peach and fuchsia. However, avoid colors in light yellow, aqua, gray, taupe or mint, which may make the bridesmaid look washed out. Fair skin: Ladies with pale skin will benefit from richly colored gowns in jewel tones. Pastels may work, but be careful about those depending on hair color. Pink or red-hued gowns may clash with someone with auburn hair. Yellow and green may not work with a fair brunette. Gray and silver may wash out someone who is pale and blonde. Once a color is chosen, brides also need to consider the season. Certain colors may look out of place depending on the season. For example, an evergreen or deep blue may seem wintry during a summer wedding. Similarly, russet or brown may work for the autumn but not for a spring wedding. Many brides gravitate toward mid-level blues, greens, pinks and purples for their weddings, simply because those colors transcend the seasons. After colors are worked out, the style of the gown deserves consideration. Because not every bridesmaid has the same physical attributes, many brides are now open to selecting a color and length and allowing the bridesmaid herself to choose the exact style. This way someone who is busty won’t feel uncomfortable in strapless, and someone who is thin won’t be overwhelmed by a lot of ruffles.

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Unique touches add personality Metro

Over the course of their lifetimes, many people will attend weddings on several occasions. The format and the festivities are similar at various ceremonies making some couples interested in setting their nuptials apart and enhance their wedding reception with a few unique ideas. Who hasn’t attended a wedding that seems formulaic? The couple enters, they do their spotlight dance, there’s food, a bouquet toss and then the cake cutting. Guests may actually be able to predict what’s coming next. While it is often customary and easy to follow tradition, that doesn’t mean you can’t offer a few creative ideas to make your event stand out. Here are several ideas you can introduce into your wedding to add something special to the reception. l Skip the big entrance. Those who were kind enough to attend the ceremony have already been introduced to the newly minted happy couple. Instead of spending the cocktail hour in the isolation of the wedding suite, mingle with your guests from start to finish. So much time is spent posing for pictures or being out of touch with guests, the cocktail hour can be a great time to sit and chat. Being with guests

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during the cocktail hour means you don’t have to make that big entrance from behind closed doors. Guests will have all eyes on you when you step on the dance floor for your first dance together. l Dance to an upbeat number. Guests are expecting a slow, sappy tune. What they may not expect is an upbeat song that shows you are willing to have a little fun. If you haven’t mastered the waltz but enjoy a little quick step now and again, feel free to choose a tune that shows your excitement and love for each other. l Encourage couples to dance

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together. It’s often customary for the bridal party to join the bride and groom on the dance floor midway through the first dance. However, that leaves spouses or significant others waiting in the wings while their dates tango with groomsmen or bridesmaids. Instead, don’t have assigned partners. Rather, encourage your bridal party members to dance with whomever they choose. l Swap the garter/bouquet toss for something more meaningful. If you’re part of a couple who feels the garter and bouquet toss has become trite, there are other ways to create special moments in your celebration ­ — ones that don’t single out the singletons who haven’t yet found their special someones. Use this time to present a small gift or token of your affection to someone on the guest list who has served as a mentor or source of inspiration.

l Choose one special component as an extra goodie for guests. Some couples feel the more they offer the better guests will view their wedding. Spending more money doesn’t necessarily mean guests will have a better time. If you want to go above and beyond the ordinary, find one thing that you absolutely love and offer that at the party. It could be a flambe presentation, a chocolate or candy bar, a carving station with your all-time favorite food (even if that’s PB&J), or a carnival-inspired automatic photo booth. l Hire a live performer. A live band adds a certain level of excitement that a deejay may not be able to provide. Those who are adding a cultural or ethnic component to their wedding may want to hire a dance troupe or another type of performer as an added measure of entertainment for guests.

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How did traditions get their start? Metro

Chances are those who have attended a wedding have witnessed some popular traditions take place. The bride wears a veil, a court of wedding attendants accompanies the bride and groom, and birdseed, rice or flower petals are tossed. But have you ever wondered why? The wedding customs are ripe with tradition and harken back to days when superstition and myth often ruled the day. Throwing rice: Today it has become de rigueur to blow bubbles, toss birdseed or release doves when the bride and groom leave the house of worship newly betrothed. That’s because savvy individuals found that raw rice can pose a hazard to birds pecking in the area. However, rice throwing is an old custom that dates back to the Middle Ages, when wheat or rice were thrown to symbolize fertility for the couple. Bouquet: Nowadays, the bride carries a beautiful bouquet of flowers. But the purpose of the bouquet held different meanings in the past. Saracen brides carried orange blossoms for fertility. Others carried a combination of herbs and flowers to ward off evil spirits with their aroma. Bouquets of dill were often carried, again for fertility reasons, and after the ceremony, the dill was eaten to encourage lust. Bridesmaids: There may be arguments over dresses and how many bridesmaids to have in a wedding party now, but in ancient times it was “the more the merrier.” That’s because bridesmaids were another measure to keep the bride safe against evil spirits. Essentially the bridesmaids were decoys for the spirits — dressing like the bride to confuse the spirits or maybe help deter them to leave the bride alone. Wedding rings: Wearing of wedding rings dates back to ancient Egypt. The round shape of a ring symbolizes eternal love. The ring is worn on the fourth finger of the left hand because it was believed this finger has a blood vessel that goes directly to the heart. Wedding cake: The traditional wedding cake evolved from Roman times when the cake was originally made from wheat. It was broken over the bride’s head to ensure fertility. All of the guests eat a piece for good luck. Single women

used to place a piece of wedding cake under their pillows in the hopes of finding their own husbands. Father accompanying the bride: This tradition symbolizes that the bride’s father endorses the choice in husbands and is presenting his daughter as a pure bride to that man. Kissing the bride: In older times, a kiss symbolized a legal bond. Therefore, the bride and groom kissed to seal the deal on their betrothal.

Honeymoon didn’t get off to a great start It has become tradition for married couples to jet off on a post-wedding vacation. This honeymoon period is a way for the bride and groom to enjoy quiet time together and start their married life on an intimate level with alone time to enjoy the company of their new mate. Although the word “honeymoon” has happy connotations today, the original meanings of the word may not be so blissful. There are varying accounts of the evolution of the word “honeymoon,” but many believe it to be a Norse tradition deriving from the word “hjunottsmanathr.” Northern European history describes women being abducted from their families and forced into marriage with a man from a neighboring village. This husband would take his new bride into hiding and stay there for a while until it was certain the bride’s family had given up the hunt and retreated. It was also tradition for Scandinavian couples to drink a sweet, honey-infused wine known as mead for a month after getting married. This may be where the “honey,” for the sweet drink, and the “moon,” for the one-month period of time, originated.

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Reception memories rely on the food you serve Metro

Despite the months of planning and poring over every minute detail of a wedding, it has often been said that what people remember most about wedding receptions is the food and if they had fun. Therefore, instead of worrying about choosing Jordan almonds over chocolate truffles, or whether the cake should have an extra tier, couples may want to pay more attention to selecting their reception menus. Although certain foods are wedding staples, it could pay for couples to think with their stomachs instead of their heads when selecting wedding day fare. Having a selection of foods that taste as good as they look is a wise idea over having certain foods simply because they are trendy. Whether you are cooking yourself, having a family member serve as chef or relying on the menu of the reception hall, think about foods that will please guests and select those items, regardless of them being fancy. Here are some other tips to consider. l You want foods to be filling but not so much so that guests have to waddle to the dance floor. If you’re planning on several courses, keep portion sizes small to offer a taste of the different items offered. l Classic foods can work well as wedding fare. Roasts, barbecued meats and favorite pasta dishes can make guests feel like they’re dining at someone’s home and not at a wedding. l Choose items people have heard of. Instead of tornadoes of beef, select a hearty prime rib. Just because a dish sounds fancy doesn’t make it taste better. If a guest doesn’t know what he or she is eating, it can be uncomfortable. Now is not the time to experiment with exotic foods, either. Otherwise, some picky eaters may be left hungry.

Photos courtesy of Happy Day Catering and Event Rental l Think about the foods you love and see if they can be incorporated at the wedding. Although a breakfast bar at an evening event may seem funny, waffles and omelets may appeal to a greater number of guests than a gourmet fish creation. l Don’t make vegetarians an afterthought. Too often, vegetarians must eat whatever the kitchen can pull together, which is usually a compilation of the vegetable garnishes from the meat dishes. Make an effort to have a true vegetarian dish that is intricate and delicious. l Mashed potatoes are a crowd pleaser. Serve little portions of mashed potatoes in cocktail glasses and enable guests to top as they see fit with bacon bits, cheese or chives. l No idea is silly, and serving any type of food in an hors d’oeuvre style can make it acceptable at a formal affair, whether that food is pizza or caviar-topped crackers. l If you have a favorite restaurant that serves delicious food, find out if they will cater your wedding. l Just because it isn’t on the menu doesn’t

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mean it cannot be prepared. Talk to the catering manager and let him or her know your preferences. Provided you’re willing to pay a little more, there’s a good chance you can have items that aren’t on the standard catering menu. l Think outside the box for your cocktail hour “bars.” A bread bar, a dipping station, milk and cookies service, or vegetable bar are options that go against the standard cheese and pasta stations. Although it’s your wedding, ultimately the goal is to please the guests. By choosing foods they will love and rave about, you’re guaranteed positive remarks on your wedding.

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Latest trends are changing gowns ARA

Although the latest Brides American Wedding Study shows the average cost of a wedding in 2010 was $26,501, a decrease of 5 percent from 2009, weddings continue to be big business. But many couples are opting to cut the guest list instead of big ticket items like wedding gowns. In fact, the average wedding gown cost $1,289 in 2010, a 20 percent increase over 2009, according to the study. This is no surprise to the millions who were glued to their television sets this past April during the most talked about wedding since the 1981 royal wedding of Lady Diana to Prince Charles. Many brides are now emulating the elegant lace gown worn by Catherine Middleton, now the Duchess of Cambridge. In addition to beautiful lace, the newest trends in wedding gowns include color, soft sleeves, short hemlines and eco-friendly materials. Whether it is Chantilly, Alencon, duchesse, guipure, or ribbon, lace has become one of the hottest trends this year. “Designers at all price points have debuted collections featuring full frothy skirts, wildflowers and lace used in both traditional and modern ways,” says Kate Campbell, department chair of Fashion & Retail Management at The Art Institute of Tampa, a branch of Miami International University of Art & Design. “This particular trend parallels the more feminine, elegant trends we see in

fashion everywhere — including more fitted and ladylike styles reminiscent of Grace Kelly and Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy.” While not for everyone, the use of color in wedding gowns has been growing in popularity. Rich and vibrant, or more subdued, color in bridal wear is everywhere. Some brides choose soft pastel colors, such as blush, rose or skin-tone.

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Others opt to wear vibrant hues of lavender, green and deep pink. Less bold brides are more likely to use hints of accent color on sashes, bows, embroidery, hems, necklines or beading. “The bride who chooses to add color to her dress is fashion forward and confident — it’s not for the faint of heart,” says Amber Chatelain, lead faculty for the Fashion & Retail Management program

at The Art Institute of TennesseeNashville, a branch of The Art Institute of Atlanta. Another interesting new trend in bridal wear is short gowns, especially for brides choosing destination and beach weddings. While they may be short in length, these dresses are not short on style. Some offer sophisticated laces, chic feathers or multilayered organza mini-skirts.

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Themes can add up to extra fun Metro

Every couple wants their wedding to be memorable. The goal of planning a wedding is to create an experience that everyone will remember for years to come. For some couples, a theme wedding is the best way to accomplish just that. When it comes time to select a theme, the day the wedding takes place may dictate the theme. For example, if the wedding takes place on Halloween, the ideas for the theme are easy. Many other couples choose a theme that highlights a specific interest or hobby or something that is dear to them. Here are some popular wedding themes. l Vegas: Couples who want to tie the knot in Las Vegas but want to ensure all their loved ones can attend can recreate the magic of Vegas wherever they may be. Casino-inspired games and big buffet meals can make guests feel like they have stepped into a casino on the famed Vegas strip. In addition, an Elvis impersonator is essential to a Vegas wedding. l TV show: Some couples elevate certain television shows to cult status. Whether it’s “Friends” or “Star Trek,” popular television shows have been transformed into festive wedding themes. Whether the idea is to go daring and exchange vows in costume or simply name reception tables according to characters or show locations, couples can include a little televi-

Photo courtesy of Happy Day Catering and Event Rental sion fun into the event. l Fairy tale: Many men and women envision a fairy-tale wedding complete with horse-drawn carriage and the “happily ever after.” This is what makes Disney properties as well as the various castles around the world popular backdrops for wedding events. Those planning a fairy-tale wedding

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need only look to favorite stories or movies for their inspiration. l Interest or passion: Love to climb mountains? Avid about scuba diving? Couples who share a particular interest can include elements of this sport or hobby into their wedding. Invitations and decor can hint at the theme, and then special activities can further

enhance it. Fish bowls as centerpieces may call to mind underwater adventures, while surfboardshaped invites may set the scene for a beachside party. Theme weddings can add an extra spice to the festivities and incorporate couples’ interests into the event — making it even more special.

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Tips for trying on wedding gowns Metro

Many brides-to-be look forward to the day when they visit a bridal salon and are able to try on gowns for the first time. There are certain tips that can make the day go much more smoothly and potentially reduce the amount of time it may take to find the perfect gown. l Wear a supportive, well constructed strapless bra or corset in your correct size. If you will be wearing a petticoat, also have the right size available. l Go without face makeup when trying on gowns so they remain clean. l Note that the size of the wedding gown you will wear is typically one to two sizes larger than your day-to-day clothes. l It’s best to limit the number of people with whom you shop to one or two trusted friends or family members. l It’s always better to order a slightly larger gown, leaving room for alterations.

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Creating the perfect celebration Family Features

Whether it’s an engagement party, bridal shower, the reception or post-wedding brunch, professional event planner Alison Hotchkiss knows a thing or two about creating memorable bridal celebrations. As the founder-owner of Alison Events, and author of “The Destination Wedding Planner: The Ultimate Guide to Planning a Wedding From Afar” (Chronicle Books), she’s produced stunning weddings all over the world. Whether you enlist the help of a planner or do it yourself, Alison’s tips on entertaining will help you make your bridal celebration picture perfect. l Bubbles add a festive, celebratory note to any bridal celebration. I love Cupcake Prosecco sparkling wine from Italy. It’s crisp and refreshing — an affordable alternative to pricey French champagne yet equally delicious. l Food doesn’t have to be complicated to be remarkable. The finger foods here are varied and flavorful — but they’re not hard to make. To satisfy all guest preferences, I always recommend 3 to 5 appetizers including chicken, beef and fish plus two veggie options (ideally one being vegan or dairy free). l A signature drink is a fun way to welcome guests and get the party off to a great start. The Prosecco Ginger Cocktail is delicious and memorable. I like to

serve it in unconventional glassware and garnish with Persian cucumber “swizzle sticks” for even more impact. l A popular alternative to the traditional sit down meal at engagement parties or showers: food stations with a range of different foods offered at each. Pair a different wine with each station to create maximum variety and enjoyment as guests taste and mingle. l Factor in overall ambiance and the vibe you want for your wedding or event. Lighting is key, and when it comes to candles, more is more. l Flavored vodka is another big trend I’m seeing right now. Look for vodkas infused with such exotic flavors as vanilla frosting, devil’s food cake and more. And don’t be afraid to mix spirits with wine: One of my favorite concoctions is a blend of lemony Cupcake Chiffon Vodka with muddled blackberries, fresh mint, sparkling grapefruit water and a splash of Cabernet Sauvignon. l It’s not only more fun to serve bite-sized cupcakes at your wedding but they offer more variety and unexpected flavor combinations than a traditional cake. l Be sure to have a good assortment of non-alcoholic beverages on hand as well such as bottled water, soft drinks and more to prevent dehydration and ensure that guests drink responsibly.

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Overnight lodging for guests Metro

When your parents or grandparents got married, there was a good chance that their closest relatives and friends lived nearby — in the neighborhood. Attending the wedding was easy, and everyone headed home afterward. This scenario is not too common nowadays. Many families have spread out across the country, or even the world, making travel a significant component of modern weddings. As a result, couples must take accommodations into consideration when planning their nuptials. Couples cannot expect relatives to travel to their wedding, party into the wee hours of the morning and then be responsible for finding a place to stay. It is common courtesy for hotel rooms to be made available to out-of-town guests. Although most couples reserve a block of rooms for guests, a bride and groom really looking to go above and beyond will choose to cover the cost of these rooms as a gift. To ensure there will be available rooms for guests, it is important to contact an area hotel (or hotels) well in advance of your wedding. To start, find out if the reception site you will be using has an agreement or relationship with an area hotel. In some cases, nearby businesses will offer a courtesy discount to facilitate foot traffic. A wedding consultant should know about packages that may include discounts on lodging. If there is no package deal, start cold-calling ho-

Couples cannot expect relatives to travel to their wedding, party into the wee hours of the morning and then be responsible for finding a place to stay. tels. If you have a discount program or frequency rewards card with a particular hotel chain, start with them first. Most hotels require a minium of 10 rooms be reserved to secure a “block.” There’s a good chance the greater the number of rooms reserved, the more competitive the nightly rate will be. Find out about cancellation policies or when guests need to make a reservation in order to secure the discounted rate. You can include information about hotel reservations right in your wedding invitation, including a code or number to mention to get the wedding discount. If you’re tech-savvy, you may have a link to the hotel’s booking website or information on your online wedding site. Either way, be sure there

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is ample time for guests to make a decision concerning their hotel reservations. As an added courtesy to guests, you can arrange shuttle bus service between the reception site and the hotel. This way guests who may have imbibed too much during the party do not need to worry about transportation to the hotel. However, they will have to make arrangements to retrieve their cars the following day. It may pay to have your wedding on a Sunday so guests are entitled to the free breakfast many hotels offer to business customers during the week. Otherwise, find out if there will be a meal available to guests the following day and offer to pay for it.

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Secrets to a long and happy marriage Metro

Some might say a long celebrity marriage is one that endures the duration of the newly betrothed’s trip down the aisle. We’ve seen Britney Spears dissolve a marriage after 55 hours and Kim Kardashian call it quits after 72 days. It seems even money can’t buy matrimonial happiness. But some couples have been together for 50, 60 years or more and say they’re still as much in love as they were the day they said “I do.” What do they know that others don’t? According to clinical psychologist and relationship guru Dr. Phil McGraw, “We all need to be flexible and to compromise in marriage, but you’ve got to be true to your core traits and characteristics, what I call your authentic self.” Some couples enter a relationship projecting a persona they believe the other person wants — one that really isn’t what they are all about. This could be a woman trying to fill the role of her husband’s nurturing mom or a guy playing the protector to his wife. In reality, marriage is more of a partnership, and truth and trust are often at the basis of good marriages. There are many other “secrets” that marriage experts will offer to couples seeking the magic formula. Whether you’re pondering marriage or have already tied the knot, consider the following advice so you too can have a marriage that endures the test of time. l There’s no such thing as the perfect marriage. Some couples create an image of what they think marriage is supposed to be, and that image often goes “poof” once reality sets in. Even soul mates are bound to

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Wedding Planner / January 2012

frustrate and irritate one another from time to time. l Couples should express their frustrations. Bottling up frustrations can eat at a person and eventually destroy a marriage. Talking about the things that are bothering you with your partner opens up a discussion and can help you work through things. l Divorce should not be seen as a viable option. Couples who want to bail on the marriage at every turn could be directing their energy toward divorce as the only solution instead of discovering ways to remove the cause of strife.

Divorce can sometimes be the easy way out when you think about the work that goes into keeping a marriage going. Experts say that there are a few issues, like adultery, abuse and drug/alcohol addiction, that may be reasonable catalysts for divorce if personal safety and sanity is being compromised. l Make time for romance. It’s easily said but not so easily done. Too often married couples forget what it was like to date when all of their attention was spent on each other instead of the house, kids, work, etc. Today there seems to be even more distractions, from emails to texts to pressure and obligations at the office. Happy couples find the time to spend quality time with their spouses — even if that’s only 10 minutes of alone time a day. l Put “we” first. Many people operate on a “me” mentality. When you’re part of a couple, give more to your spouse than you take. If he or she is doing the same, you’re working collectively for the benefit of the marriage instead of yourselves. l Respect each other. Often couples having troubles realize they treat strangers better than they treat each other. Would you use the insults or unflattering terms that you sometimes throw at your spouse with a complete stranger? Probably not. Good marriages are based on a foundation of respect and love. It’s easy to lose feelings of love if the respect is gone. Couples can realize that there are some thorns that come with the roses of marriage, and staying happy together always takes work, but it will all be worth it in the end.

What to do if your bridesmaid is pregnant Metro

Brides-to-be thinking of asking a pregnant friend or family member to be in the bridal party should know such a request is common. Recent findings indicate that around half of all weddings now have at least one member of the bridal party showing off a baby bump — sometimes it’s even the bride herself. Barring a medical condition, there is no reason a pregnant woman can’t be in the wedding and fulfill her obligations, so feel free to invite that special someone to be in the wedding. There are just a few things to consider to help make it easier on everyone involved. l Gowns: One of the things brides and bridesmaids often fret about is the gown they will be wearing. While nonpregnant members of the bridal party won’t fluctuate much in weight from the day of their first fittings to the wedding day, a pregnant woman is growing with new life within her from the moment of conception. This will have to be taken into consideration. Some maternity designers create bridesmaid dresses for pregnant

women, but they may not exactly match the other gowns in mind. Ask the bridal store if alterations can be made to a standard gown, including ordering a much larger size, adding elastic panels or another way to ensure the gown will stretch over a growing belly. Also, be considerate and choose a gown in an empire waist style so that it is flattering for the pregnant bridesmaid. l Shoes: While pregnant, some women’s feet swell. Having strict restrictions on footwear can make a pregnant woman uncomfortable. Low heels or ballerina slippers can be comfortable and fashionable. The other members of the bridal party may also thank you for choosing a sensible shoe. l Breaks: Many activities during the wedding are bound to be tiring. But someone who is pregnant may feel it more than others. Ensure your mama-to-be has ample time to sit and rest. Also, try to have planning meetings near a restroom where she will be comfortable. l Nonalcoholic drinks: From bachelorette parties to the wedding itself, be sure there are plenty of nonalco-

Around half of all weddings now have at least one member of the bridal party showing off a baby bump. holic and decaffeinated drinks she can enjoy. Pregnant women need to have a lot of water to meet the physical demand of pregnancy as well. l Travel: In the latter months of the pregnancy, many doctors advise against air travel. Spending long hours in a car may be uncomfortable as well. If you were thinking about having the wedding far away, these are things that must be taken into consideration. You may want to revise your plans if your heart is set on having this woman in the bridal party. l Ceremony: It can be tiring for a pregnant woman, especially one in the last trimester, to stand for a long period of time. If you are having a long, religious ceremony, see if a

seat can be arranged so your bridesmaid can sit down when she needs to rest. l Declined invitation: Some pregnant women will jump at the chance to be in the wedding, while others may realize their limitations and prefer to attend only as a guest. Have another person in mind in case your bridesmaid invitation is declined, and do not hold it against the person if she feels she won’t be able to commit during her pregnancy. l Patience: Although all eyes are generally on the bride on her special day, having a pregnant bridesmaid may mean sharing the spotlight some.

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Packing for the honeymoon Metro

With ever-changing restrictions on what a person can take on airlines and other modes of travel, packing is something that should be planned. According to a study in 2010 by The Wedding Report, 81 percent of newly married couples take a honeymoon. The top honeymoon destination for those in North America is the Caribbean, where the average couple will spend $3,500 on their honeymoon. Although 15 percent choose to cruise to their destinations, the remaining likely drive or fly. In any case, packing becomes part of honeymoon planning. Some people are good at packing and can execute the task rather easily. Others are left with a bulging suitcase that won’t pass muster at security clearance or meet size and weight guidelines imposed by airlines. Nevertheless, anyone can become a packing pro with a few guidelines. If you don’t already have a suitcase, choose a design with a hard case. This way it won’t expand while packing, and there’s no chance it will ever exceed the size limits. Roll clothes because it will

limit wrinkling. Use a layering technique to fit a multitude of items and protect against displacement during transit. Fill the bottom of the suitcase with heavier items like shoes and jackets. Next, layer dresses and slacks so they lay lengthwise on top of the first layer of items. It’s okay if the ends extend over the edge of the suitcase. Shirts and sweaters (if applicable) can be rolled and then layered next. Use any overhanging slacks and dresses to fold over the shirts and keep them in place. Lightweight items, like lingerie and undergarments, can be placed on top. Also, include toiletries that are sealed in leak-proof bags. Be sure to know airline requirements in advance. While some restrictions have been lifted, the Traffic Safety Administration and the airlines may have rules regarding how much liquid you can bring along. Keep important documents, such as tickets, reservation numbers and emergency contacts, with you in a travel bag. Any prescriptions you need should be carried as well. Place an emergency outfit in your carry-on in the event your luggage is lost or temporarily detained. Consider packing lightly and buying some necessities at your destination.

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Planning for your wedding night After the thrill of wedding festivities, couples often jet off to a honeymoon retreat and begin an entirely different adventure. For many couples, the honeymoon holds a special meaning of being intimate for the first time as husband and wife. Such significance can put pressure on a happy and natural experience. Honeymoon and wedding-night jitters are normal. According to a recent survey from Brides magazine, one in three brides plan to get into bed on the wedding night and sleep. After all of the hoopla of planning and enjoying the wedding, most people are exhausted. Others say they plan to stay up and relive moments of the day and about half of all couples think they will consummate the marriage on their wedding night. Taking the pressure off of the wedding night means that the rest of the

honeymoon may be filled with opportunities to be amorous. But couples may still be filled with expectations for the perfect romantic retreat. And with that some things need to be considered. Accept the fact that some wedding nights and honeymoons aren’t exactly what’s pictured in the movies. Don’t try to live up to a Hollywood idea or you may be let down when things don’t go that way. In other words, it may rain on your beachside liaison. A wedding requires a lot of work. Many people find themselves to be physically exhausted afterward. Others find they are so wound up that they can’t relax. When the mind or body is on adrenaline overload or completely wiped out, it’s not the ideal situation for romantic endeavors. Try to make the honeymoon stand apart from other nights by packing nice lingerie or nighttime attire so that the memories will be special.

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Wedding Planner / January 2012

Things to consider when creating your registry Metro

Today, registering is an interactive process enjoyed by the couple. There are no longer hard-set rules that need to be followed, rather decision making should be about creating a comfortable home and enjoying your new life together. Tradition and beauty lead couples to register for sterling silver flatware, whether they grew up with it in their home, or they want it to entertain their family and friends. However, sterling is just one of the many beautiful flatware options available to couples creating a wedding registry.

Stainless steel is a selection from which to choose, 18/10 stainless steel is a durable option, making it good for everyday use and is the highest quality stainless. Its weight and dimensions convey quality in a sophisticated and effortless way. New finishes and sheens allow stainless steel to look more elegant than ever. Both products can make a table look sophisticated and romantic with just the right touch of sparkle. And they are anything but basic, as they come in a range of patterns from ornate and decorative to modern and sleek. When creating your registry some things to consider include:

l Register about five to eight months before the wedding. This assures that your list will be in place before any parties or showers. l An experienced, professional wedding registry consultant has the product knowledge to help you with your selections and coordinate items. Many stores have one on staff to help with your registry. l Remember to consider store accessibility when creating your registry. You’ll want to make sure guests can get you the items you requested. Consider registering at two or more stores for guest convenience. Just don’t overlap gifts or you’ll end up with duplicates.

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Wedding Planner / January 2012

What’s on your wedding registry? Next to People magazine and chick-lit paperbacks, wedding registries are my favorite guilty-pleasure reading. I love to watch the action unfold, as wedding guests pick and choose gifts and the registries are updated. I love the suspense — will the happy couple receive their cookware? And I love being able to spy on someone else’s life and style without being called a stalker! I read and monitor the registries of friends for altruistic reasons, of course, but I also keep track of registries belonging to couples I don’t much care for, and to whose weddings I’m not invited because, well, I’m nosy. And also because registries — especially if they’re full of really expensive or gaudy items, or if they’re multiple pages long — make for great gossip. But most, most, most of all, I enjoy reading the bridal registries of celebrities, many of which appear on www.weddingchannel.com, a website that covers all things wedding and has links to registries at a variety of stores. I have no shame. I get a kick out of knowing that actress Alicia Silverstone (“Clueless”), who married her long-time boyfriend, Christopher Jarecki, lead singer for the band S.T.U.N., on June 11, got all the Vera Wang toasting flutes ($75 each) on her Macy’s registry but still wants four dinner plates from Neiman Marcus. The best registries I’ve come across have Paris Hilton’s name on them. Paris Hilton registered at Target, where she has a Rejuvenique Facial Toning System on her list.

Of course it makes no sense. Paris is rich. Odds are she has a professional facialist of her own. The registry didn’t ring true. Later I read that poor Paris has been the subject of several Internet registry hoaxes. Which brings me to my point: You can tell a whole lot about a couple by their bridal registry, including some things you’re better off not knowing. Do I really want to know that the bride and groom plan to sleep on red satin sheets? You can tell about the dynamics of a marriage, too. Say she likes traditional and he likes modern. A registry full of traditional stuff? She’s the boss. A registry full of modern? He’s the boss. Some say it’s fine to ask for expensive stuff if you’re in the sort of socio-economic circles where people may actually buy it. But I think people who register for really expensive items have an opinion of themselves that is way too high. I understand the purpose of registries. I understand that it’s supposed to make giving easier for wedding guests. Except they don’t always work that way. Allow me to help with some of the many vexing questions ... Q: Is it rude to include information on a wedding registry with the wedding invitation? A: Yes. Q: Do I have to choose a gift from the registry? A: No. As the gift-giver, you get to decide what to give. Still, the couple picked the registry items so you know you’re giving them something they want. If giving from the registry makes you feel uncreative, add something to make the gift more personal. Give four wine glasses you know they want — and a bottle of their favorite sparkling water or wine.

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Q: How much do I have to spend? A: Use your relationship as your guide. If you like the happy couple, spend a lot. If you’re attending the wedding as a social or family obligation, spend less. I think it’s rude to give something valued at less than $50 — which is different than spending $50; if you find a $50 item marked down to $20, you’ve met your requirement. Meanwhile, according to a survey of 15,000 brides and newlyweds for www.theknot.com and Kohl’s, you should spend $50 to $75 on a co-worker, distant relative or family friend to whom you’re not close. If you’re attending the wedding of a friend or relative, spend between $75 and $100. And if you’re attending the wedding of a best friend, spend at least $100. According to Rosanna McCollough, weddingchannel.com editor-in-chief, most wedding guests spend between $100 and $150 per couple. Q: Do I have a year to fork over a gift? A: I think it’s perfectly fine to send the gift within a year, because most people think that’s the rule. Etiquette experts say you should send the gift in time for the wedding; if you can’t make that deadline, send it within three months. Q: Should I take the gift to the wedding itself? A: No. Mail it. Q: Anything else? A: Toast the happy couple.  (c) 2005, Detroit Free Press. Visit the website of the Detroit Free Press, at www. freep.com. Distributed by Knight Ridder// Tribune Information Services.

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By Georgea Kovanis

Knight Ridder Newspapers

208.413.6715 judygara@cableone.net mylindtchocolatersvp.com/JudithGara Wedding Planner / January 2012

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ENGAGEMENT ANNOUNCEMENT Return form to: The Lewiston Tribune, PO Box 957, 505 Capital St., Lewiston ID 83501 Contact: Jeanne M. DePaul, (208) 848-2221 or jdepaul@lmtribune.com Deadline is 5 p.m. Tuesday

The bride-elect Full legal name of bride-elect …......................................................................................... Her city of residence: ….................................................. Telephone …............................. Her place of employment (include city) ….......................................................................... Her parents' names and city of residence: …....................................................................... ….......................................................................................................................................... Her educational background (include high school, college or trade school, location and year of graduation) ….......................................................................................................... …..........................................................................................................................................

The bridegroom-elect Full legal name of bridegroom-elect: .................................................................................. His city of residence: ...................................................... Telephone ….............................. His place of employment (include city): …......................................................................... His parents' names and city of residence: …........................................................................ ….......................................................................................................................................... His educational background (include high school, college or trade school, location and year of graduation): …......................................................................................................... Wedding date and place if set: …......................................................................................... Photo submitted? (Include self-addressed stamped envelope for return): .......................... Contact name for billing: …................................................................................................. Contact e-mail address: …................................................................................................... Telephone (daytime) …....................................... (evening) ...............................................

Engagement information and photo must be submitted to the Tribune no later than 5 p.m. Tuesday to be considered for publication in the Sunday A.M. Section. Rate is $9 per column inch. Announcements must be paid prior to publication. 28

Wedding Planner / January 2012

WEDDING ANNOUNCEMENT Return form to: The Lewiston Tribune, PO Box 957, 505 Capital St., Lewiston ID 83501 Contact: Jeanne M. DePaul, (208) 848-2221 or jdepaul@lmtribune.com Deadline is 5 p.m. Tuesday

The bride Full legal name …..........….................................................................................................. Did bride change her last name to the bridegroom's name? …........................................... Her city of residence: ….................................................. Telephone …............................. Her place of employment (include city) ….......................................................................... Occupation: ......................................................................................................................... Her parents' names and city of residence: …....................................................................... ….......................................................................................................................................... Her educational background (include high school, college or trade school, location and year of graduation) ….......................................................................................................... …..........................................................................................................................................

The bridegroom Full legal name of bridegroom: …...................................................................................... His city of residence: ...................................................... Telephone ….............................. His place of employment (include city): …......................................................................... Occupation: ......................................................................................................................... His parents' names and city of residence: …........................................................................ ….......................................................................................................................................... His educational background (include high school, college or trade school, location and year of graduation): …......................................................................................................... Wedding date and place (include city): …........................................................................... Name and title of person who performed ceremony: …...................................................... If minister, list his/her church affiliation (include city): …................................................. If judge or other official, list city of residence: …............................................................... Wedding Planner / January 2012 29

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Wedding Planner / January 2012

What not to serve at a wedding Couples often fret over what to serve their guests at the reception. Reception costs can comprise a majority of the wedding-day budget. When spending $100 or more per guest, you want to ensure you’re getting what you paid for and that guests enjoy what they are eating. Filet mignon may be a good choice, but steak tartare is probably best avoided. Here are some foods best avoided when planning the menu. Exotic cuisine: You may be a risk taker when it comes to cuisine, but others may not share your zeal for exotic foods. Now is not the time to introduce guests to the wild and wacky. Anything on fire: Why risk an accident for a spectacle? Baked alaska, cherries jubilee, apples flambe — these are foods that might provide a show, but the cost may not be worth it in the end. Raw food: Clams on the halfshell or sushigrade tuna may seem like good ideas, but keep in mind that it is hard to ensure quality when feeding 200 people at the same time. A long, sit-down meal: Two or three courses is fine, but if guests have to sit through a neverending parade of courses, it limits their ability to mingle and have a good time. Anything too elaborate: The faster servers can get food out to guests the better. If they have to sit there piping mashed potato roses on dishes or assemble intricate canapes, the delay might not be worth the presentation. Themed food: Don’t dye that baked potato purple because you want the wedding to be a plum-colored affair. Also, it’s best to avoid themed food, unless it is part of a cultural wedding or can be pulled off with class. No food at all: Whether your wedding is small or grand in scale, guests will expect some sort of food. Be sure to have some butler-passed hors d’oeuvres or some well-placed pickings for guests to grab while mingling.

Moscow-Pullman Daily News Wedding and engagement announcement submission guidelines: Announcements can be dropped off at the Daily News office. The deadline for each Saturday is 5 p.m. the Tuesday before desired publication date. Cost is $6.13 per column inch with a discount for announcements also being published in the Lewiston Tribune. Announcements can also be mailed to: The Moscow-Pullman Daily News 409 S. Jackson Moscow, ID 83843 OR emailed to: mandyc@dnews.com Questions should be directed to Mandy Charbonneau at (208) 882-5561.

Wedding Planner / January 2012

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Wedding Planner / January 2012

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