Summer Issue Survival Series

CANDACE KIRKPATRICK

we know only God can heal. May I have His eyes and heart of compassion.

Life Envue

What are you doing now? Regarding your projects, I know you've got a lot of stuff on the fire. What are you doing now? When you started talking you said nobody was doing these Christian films and this stuff Did you know that He \vas go ing to use you?

Candace Kirkpatrick

No I'm just grateful, though I am so grateful for His mercy In about 2018, I felt the Lord calling me back into this indus try. I had prayed and told Him that if He ever did so, I wanted to do work that honored Him I began to explore faith-based entertainment because it had exploded since I had left in the late 90's It had grown in quality, caliber and content I at tempted to re-enter in 2018 but we experienced a tragedy that knocked the wind out of our sails. That prompted me to begin my prayer closet also fr om the Lord So, I really re turned in 2.019. I attended the Christian Worldview Film Fes tival, where I discovered a week before it was held that it was only seven minutes from my house.

The first day I attended, I came home crying and exclaimed to my husband, "Honey, I found my peeps." First, I found people who were first and foremost enthusiastic about the Lord Chl"ist is preeminent in all things, and everything we do is for His glory Second, they were passionate about raising the bar of excellence in faith-based entertainment to earn a 1·ight at the table.

Terri, as you know, many people aren't going to enter chtD"ch doors My desire is to be a part of creating excellent work that God has His hands upon so those who may not enter a church building may enter a movie theater or turn on their TV will have a divine encounter with the living Lord

At that point, God set up divine appointments for different people While there, I met Jarod O'Flaherty, the writer/ di rector of the c1-ime drama Vindication. I was so impressed with what he was doing that I intr oduced myself to let him know that I was committed to praying for his ser ies and all that God was calling him to do I did not give him an actor's spiel nor a headshot but instead expressed how much I ap preciated what he was doing Ten months later he saw an interview I did about my walk and training and called me up to offer me a role on Vindicatfon

In May of 2019, I went to another film festival in Orlando called the Christian Inter national Film Festival. I went t hear Karen Abercrombie of War Room Discarded Things, and gels Unaware. She spoke for about 45 minutes, and it w direct download tirom the Lord Himself Everything sh ed my spirit I spoke to her briefly following her talk an id, "I can now leave the conference. What you shared directly from the Lord, and I want to thank you " And sh re ponded, "The Lord has shown me that you and I are g to vork together "

despite my past my fears, my shortcomings, my doubts In Corinthians, God says that we have this treasure in jars of clay Christ is that treasure And we have Him in jars of clay, cracked pots It is through those cracks that His light can shine through to a dark world that desperately needs Him That's what I want more than anything - to be used by Him, that I would be a blessing to Him by pointing others to Him. After all nothing else really matters. Everything else will burn up like rubbish.

Life Envue

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That it is temporary, but the things in C h ist are eternal. Candace you are amazing And I'm so blessed to get to know you and have you in our magazine. Please leave us with some words of encouragement. Talk to that little Candace, that little Candace running herself ragged, trying to be what God already said she would be, trying to become and trying to help God out, right?

Candace Kirkpatrick

Oh, man, you hit the nail on the head That's exactly it A while back, I had to write on my bathroom mirror, "Dear Candace, I've got it. Love you God." Because somewhere in the back of my brain, I e1Toneously thought, "Lord, you need my help here " Hysterical that I would think that the Sovereign Creator of the Universe needs my help. Ugh. Again, if I could talk to anyone, I would encourage them to get in the

Word. Flray that the Lord gives them a hunger for His Word. Start with the gospels. Surround yourself with people pursuing hard after Jesus so you are not running this race alone And when you are feeling tempted, discouraged abandoned or neglected, go to His Word Read the Psalms Put on praise music Remind yourself that you are bought with a price, the precious blood of Christ, not with anything that is corruptible but with His blood. Know that His plans for you are good. His plans are to prosper you, not to harm you. And wherever you are and whatever you have, give it to Him. Say Lord, I am feeling depressed today I will give it to you Lord I am feeling confused today I will give it to you I offer myself to you, Lord Just shape me, mold me into the image of your Son, and use me wherever you want." And then trust that He sees you. He loves you, and you are beautifully made in His image.

Life Envue

And he knows your name Amen He knows your name Not what they call you. He knows your name, our name. Ms. Candace thank you so much for be ing a part of Life Envue, living in view of eternity. I'm so grateful. So grateful.

I am blessed to be here, but again, the only special thing in me is Him; there is no good in me apart from Him And He's all that matters

Candace Kirkpatrick

Life Envue

I’m so excited to have Pastor Patricia Douglas, an author, television host and minister with a powerful testimony. Pastor Patricia thank you so much for being with us today.

Pastor Patricia Douglas

Yes, thank you for having me.

Life Envue

Tell us a little about yourself, where are you from?

Pastor Patricia Douglas

I'm originally from Nashville, Tennessee, and I was born in Fort Campbell, Kentucky. But Nashville is my home. And so, when you ask me where I have been, I want to say I've been hidden and on the backside of the desert. That's what I really believe. And I believe that at this point, in this time, the Lord has begun to open the doors that he is ready to open. Things that he told me years ago are now taking place right now, today. So, again, I think I just been on that backside, learning, being matured, being stripped, crucifying the flesh, getting attitudes together, coming out of pride, coming out of religion, so God can use me.

Life Envue

Sounds busy.

Pastor Patricia Douglas

Well, let me tell you when you start getting delivered from sin, it's not one and done. And we must realize that, right. And so still things that we're shedding off and the Holy Spirit says, “Hey, we need to work on this.” Instead of saying, “well, I don't want to work on it right now.” I seek God’s face and desire to learn things about me, from His perspective.

Life Envue

Somebody told me, if you don't have time to do it right, you have time to do it again. I ain't got that kind of time.

Pastor Patricia Douglas

Let me tell you, Pastor Terri, I've been saying

this a lot. We must know from the Holy Ghost, even when we meet people and I tell people we have a spirit of discernment. Our natural eyes are used to keep you off the curb when you’re driving. But your spiritual eyes help you see in the spirit. You must have the eyes of the spirit because we don't have years to get to know people. You must know immediately whether that's a divine connection or not, you must know that at once.

Life Envue

I love the story about Jesus when he saw Zacchaeus in a tree and Zacchaeus was so impressed that Jesus knew who he was even before they spoke. Sometimes you've got to know where that person has been so that they don't waste your time trying to make you fit into situations that you weren't called to fit into. And you don't waste their time trying to make them feel like you are going to fit. When you know you ain't going to fit, you go keep it moving. Tell us about some of your family background. Do you have a Christian background? A Christian, Bible believing mama and daddy?

Well Pastor Terri it's so interesting, and I do tend to get a little bit emotional because there's such a story behind it. But as I had shared with you, I was adopted. And so, at seven months old, and when my parents came into the foster home to pick the different children, my mom saw me in the crib peeking through the thing, and she went over there, and the Holy Spirit said, “this is your daughter”. And so, she said, to my dad, “this is her.” My dad said, “Are you sure?” She said, “The Holy Spirit said this is her.”

And they were going to change my name, because my biological mother had named me Patricia Anne. And the Holy Spirit said, “no. You're going to keep it. Patricia Ann.” When my family went on vacation, we went to tent meetings and church services.

So, I did see miracles. I saw these things take place. But by the time I turned twelve that's when religion set in, because that's when peo-

Pastor Patricia Douglas

ple stopped believing in miracles. My mom and dad never stopped believing, but we started going to a church that was very much in bondage. Can I say it like that? Don't wear this, don't wear that. So, over the years, when you start getting into religion, everything kind of changes right? But still, at and, even though I was raised in a Christian home, things of that nature, my mom was a prayer warrior, my dad, too. I decided I want something else better than this. So, I just started doing my own thing. And one day I discovered I was pregnant at 17. My dad was respected in the church. He was a superintendent and things of that nature. The pastor told him, “you need to put her out of the house.” But my father said, “I can’t do that. Where would she go? What would she do?”

Life Envue

Oh wow!

Pastor Patricia Douglas

I mean, it was rough, when that religious spirit set in it went in deep. I didn’t want any part of church.

Life Envue

Yes. It's hard to come out from under addiction and then that set of standards as salvation. It's hard because the Bible tells us we can't live the law. There's no way that we could have survived trying to live this law. I mean, everything you do is wrong.

Pastor Patricia Douglas Exactly.

Life Envue

No way we could have survived it. So, tell me this. If you could look your enemy, that religious spirit, in the face today, we supposed to be polite

and loving and show grace and mercy. So, let's say religion was a person. If it were a person, if you could talk to him or her, how would you tell them thank you?

Pastor Patricia Douglas

I would start by saying, “First giving honor to God, who's the head of my life. Then I would politely ask him to “Meet me in the parking lot!” (jokingly) That religious spirit is a lie, and it's hurt so many people, and it’s destroyed so many lives. But because of it, I've had to be stretched beyond what I thought I wanted to be stretched. Yet it has helped me to recognize the

signs so that I can instruct people about it. So, for that I would say, “thank you.”

Life Envue

Give me three identifiers, what is a religious spirit?

Pastor Patricia Douglas

One of the religious spirits is to tell you that you don't hear from the Father God and that he does not want to have relationship with you, which is a religious lying spirit. The second religious spirit is saying that your pastor or your leader is the only one that can lead and guide you and tell you where you're supposed to go, what you're supposed to do, who you're supposed to marry. And sometimes they will prophesy to you. Okay, an-

other thing with a religious spirit is even something simple in a tail bearing or gossiping spirit, a judgmental spirit, a condescending spirit, a spirit that tries to intimidate. The most common sign of a religious spirit is when the Pastor of the church says, “I’m the only one hearing from God.” That is a religious spirit. And not only that, but it is also a controlling, manipulating spirit. And not only that, but it’s also part of Jezebel, which can be a man or a woman.

Life Envue

You just put it all out there. You just laid it all on the table. Is this how we're going to do things?

Pastor Patricia Douglas

If it's going to set some people free, yes, ma'am.

Life Envue

Just drop it like it's hot. Okay, well, let me ask you this then, how do you get out from under it? Because the hardest thing for me to do, the hardest thing for me when I was coming up out of it?

Pastor Patricia Douglas

If you know or believe in your heart, and especially if the Holy Spirit has shown you are in an environment that operates through a religious spirit and a religious dominion, then what your next question is, lord, what do you want me to do next? Okay, number two, you want to say, am I also operating with a religious spirit? Because you could be. I think really that's number one. And when the Holy Spirit shows you, yes, you have allowed a spirit of religiosity to operate in you, then you want to ask, Holy Spirit, okay, how did that door happen? How did I let that in? And how do I go ahead and begin to uproot. Because Jesus said, any plant that my heavenly father has not planted will be uprooted. So, Father, I need this religious spirit uprooted out of me. And see, I'm going to tell you, Pastor Terri, once you start being set free from it, that's how you begin to really recognize it. Do you see what I'm saying? Because think about it. When you say if you're in a room and somebody's cooking something, well, you can get used to that smell and you don't

know, right? But then as you begin to come out of you say, oh, wait a minute, wait a minute, I see this, I see that. Does that make sense?

Life Envue

Yes. The smell of smoke stays on you second hand. Yeah, I absolutely get that.

Pastor Patricia Douglas

This is one of the things I think that when people and that's one thing that really hurts my heart and that's tender to me, too, is when I do talk to people and they say, I've been through church hurt. I don't want to go back. I don't want to do this or that or whatever. So, I'm saying, okay, now, are you looking at the person, right? Because that shouldn’t have anything to do with your relationship with Father God, but it does. So, when someone says they have church hurt, you can't keep going. Here, there, here, there, here, there. Do you see what I'm saying? And sometimes I'm going to do like what my dad said one time. He said, Well, Patricia, if you go over here and there's something and you leave and you go over here and it's the same thing. He said, “Do you see a common denominator?” I said, “No, Daddy, I don't see the common denominator.” Then I realized, It's me! But seriously, when people are hurting and right now, people are looking for authenticity. And so, what I want them to realize is you don't live by nobody else's experience. You live by the word of God yourself, right? Did you learn anything while you were there before you got hurt? Did you learn anything before this? Are you sure it's not the accuser of the brethren? You see, you got to narrow everything down, but do you have anything that you take away? Are you holding unforgiveness bitterness, strife?

Life Envue

You got to look at the whole picture, because it's not just church. It's not just church. You got a meal somewhere at some restaurant that didn't get cooked your way, okay? And that's how life is. You're not going to be able to get out of this world, get out of time, get out of this dispensa-

tion, enter heaven and say, you could not be a better mother because the kids were bad, and you could have been a better wife if your husband had come home on time. And I could have been better if he's going to ask what you did and how you did it, regardless as to what was being done. Jesus didn't stop being a savior because they hit him, they beat him. He was wounded, he was bruised. He didn’t say, “I could have been a better Savior if I hadn’t experienced being hurt by the people that needed saving!”

I started thinking about this three years ago when we stand before God, and he says to Patricia Ann Douglas, why didn't you fulfill this assignment. What really would I be able to say? Because He already knows why I didn't, we will have to give an account.

Life Envue

And the world’s response to rejection of Christ and holiness can’t be because of Pastor so-an-so.

Pastor Patricia Douglas

We will be without an excuse. Whatever the excuse is, we will be without an excuse. He says he leaves his mark, his print, his thumbprint, his footprint in the natural, in the elements, in the air, in the sky. And there's always something telling us, this is God. What message would you give that younger you, that you that endured all that stuff, and now you're sitting here going, “Look at God! My soul looked back and wondered how I made it over!” What would you say to that younger girl?

Pastor Patricia Douglas

I would say, “Patricia listen to your parents, because they know exactly what they're talking about.” I had to listen to my dad, if I had listened to him, there were some decisions I would not have made. But I really thought, well, and because they were a little older when they adopted me, I'm thinking, well, ya’ll old and don't understand but if I had just listened and even if by faith I had obeyed it would be different.

Life Envue

Yes. And some people think that surviving means it's okay. Some kids will look at their parents and go, well, Mama made it. But that kinda grace that I had on my life, might not be on their life. There are some things I've done in my life that I don't have a clue why I did it, and I sho’ don’t know

how I got out! It was nothing but grace!

What would you say Pastor Patricia to the champion you?

Pastor Patricia Douglas

Do you know what? What I would say to her, Patricia, I pray you please the Father whenever I do anything, whether I have a conference or service when I get home or whatever, I'll say, Daddy, did I please you? Did it please you?

And that's what I want to say. I would say, “Did Patricia please you?”

Life Envue

How do you want to be remembered?

Pastor Patricia Douglas

You're looking at a woman who lived in fear, shy, rejection, wouldn't open her mouth, wouldn't speak, wouldn't sing, wouldn't do anything at all So, I want to be remembered as a woman with a heart for people I’m not perfect, but I really had a heart for people That's how I want to be remembered

Life Envue

Wow. Tell us about your talk show.

Pastor Patricia Douglas

The name of it is A Few of My Friends And that name came from where? In, I wanted to have a lunch for some women who had been iron sharpened, iron, prayed with me. It wasn't a whole lot of them. Pastor Terri, six or seven. I wanted to have lunch, but I never did. And then the Lord said, “I want you to bring some women together”. And I said, okay, I will. He said, “I want you to call the gathering, A Few of My Friends. So, I had my first gathering, August 2018. A Few of My Friends some of the women I didn't even know The Lord told me, “I have mantled you and I have anointed you to see the riches and the treasures in my daughters, and I want you to bring them to the surface because I'm ready to use them and catapult them”. So that's what the women's ministry is about. And we do meet so many times a year. I do live every Monday, but then the

broadcast is on every Thursday night. A Few of My Friends and sometimes I have guests. Sometimes I'm preaching or teaching. It's whatever the Father tells me to do.

I'm on Facebook under A Few of My Friends, and any of our live streams are on Facebook and the YouTube channel of A Few of My Friends. And then you can contact me that way or through our website mapdministries.com, and you can find out more information. But I'm on Facebook, and YouTube.

Life Envue

Pastor Patricia, if you could undo anything, would you?

Pastor Patricia Douglas

Yes. There are some decisions that I've made, some things I overlooked in my life I should say that I didn't pay attention to. And if I could go back again, go back and say, okay, let me tweak this right here, let me tweak that, let me do this. The enemy is the accuser of the brethren, but that that he's accusing us at times, it was true. It's something that did take place, right? So, then it's like, father, the Bible said to agree with your adversary. So, when I go into the courts of heaven and I'm praying, I said, Lord, which did take place, which did happen, but I renounced that. I asked forgiveness for that, even from the generations before me.

Life Envue

Tell us where to find your books and then and then leave us an encouraging word, talk to that little Patricia.

Pastor Patricia Douglas

You can purchase the books on Amazon as well as on my website mapdministries.com. I want to say this I need you all to listen to me very closely. I did not make it because I was raised in a Christian home. That helped, okay? But I want to tell you, You will absolutely make it. I decree and I declare that you will make it. You will have to make some decisions and in the name of Jesus. Right now, there may be some people that you're still connected to. We need to cut and sever that because they don't have your best interest. So, I want to say to you whether you’re pregnant. I don't know what age you are, but I pray right now that the Lord God will surround you with people that will encourage you, and they will help you, and they will speak life into you, because I will speak life to you in the name of Jesus. If you're around anybody that's not speaking life, they need to be severed and cut off from you in the name of Jesus. But if you have somebody that's speaking life, I didn't have a lot of people around me speaking life.

I may have had two people. My story goes on. I didn't go outside that much. It's a long story, a different thing. But what I'm saying to you is right now, the Lord knows where you are. And let me tell you another thing. He is not mad at you and he's not out to get you. I just hear the Holy Spirit saying to tell you he is not out to get you, that he loves you and wants to show his love towards you. And that's what you need to focus on right now because he will make a way. He did some things for me when I was pregnant. That's in my book. It was like, but Lord, I'm not married and I'm not this and that. And I'm going to tell you something else. The Lord was speaking to me, and he told me I was going to have a son, and I did. So, I just want to encourage you right now. Most important, the Father loves you, and I need you to know that he cares about you, and he still has your best interest in Jesus’ name.

DYNAMIC WOMAN

I waited to present her. I wanted to do it sooner but was sure she’d want to wait until she had some kind of glamour shot taken and wanted to be sure I would have taken her to get that done so she would allow me to do this. I waited, trying to showcase others so no one would think I was trying to only boast about the one I call Dynamic. I waited, trying to present others first before making it personal. To everyone else (even themselves), they may seem ordinary, everyday, run of the mill women, but to us and plenty others, they are amazing, outstanding, downright Dynamic!! Some obliged and allowed me to use this platform as a means of showing appreciation and giving flowers to those now whom we appreciate. Some felt unworthy, or felt they had nothing to share and didn’t wish to be in the spotlight. All the while, waiting to shine the light on this gem, Constance Jones (nee Razor).

Scheduled to be given up for adoption, on July 3, 1953, she made her debut in this world. My grandmother fascinated me with the story of how, when she was born, my grandmother took one look at that little chocolate baby with a head full of curls and fell in love. She told the lady who was coming to get her and handle giving her up to someone (mom’s fraternal grandmother, I believe), ‘You may as well get on outta here because you ain’t getting' my baby!’ I never even wondered what, even IF my life would be had that taken place! Thanks be to God; she didn’t go through with it.

CONNIE

A full life lived, my mother had her share of ups and downs and good and bad times. She made it through so much; I just remember her being a pillar of strength! I remember how she was a manager at a local 7-11 Store and there being a gas war with the station across the street and gas got as low as like 89c/gallon!! I also recall a time when she balled up her fist and punched a man once for picking up my brother by the collar in a chokehold! I recall him saying “I was just kidding with the boy, Connie!” and she responded, “I said, put my son down! I don’t care if you are playing, you don’t play with my child like that!” My mouth was wide open in amazement! I saw so much strength in her! I remember after her first divorce, she had to do so much on her own One day, I came home from school, and she was in the driveway changing the oil on her car! WHAT!!?? She never ceased to amaze me! She did so much for so many people and sometimes I was offended by that and wanted to protect her! I hardly ever saw her get rest! She remarried and I graduated and moved out, started a career and got married, starting my own family. I felt she finally had some help, and she was living a life for herself! After some years, she was going through another divorce, and I could see her light dimming again. Things were weighing on her and she was back in the ‘I can do it myself’ mode.

STROKE

It was September of 1999, and she was battling with her blood pressure, life’s stresses and had been suffering from headaches off and on. This day, she attended the funeral of a coworker’s spouse and came home to try to take something to get a terrible headache to go away. Later that night, I got the call that changed our lives forever! ‘Your mom can’t move or talk. Her eyes are open but nothing else and we’ve called 911 so meet us at the hospital!’ I beat the ambulance to her house and drove behind them to the hospital. They confirmed she suffered an ‘Intracranial Hemorrhage’; bleeding on the brain and they were transporting her to another hospital for emergency brain surgery to clamp the bleed!

At the other hospital, they do the surgery and come out and the doctor wants the family to go into the ‘family room’ to talk to us! I was afraid since they wouldn’t say anything to us outside in the waiting area and refused to go in the room! I knew what they told people in the movies when they went into those rooms, so I dug my feet in and was NOT going in! I recall my aunt trying to calmly tell me that we had to go in to hear what the doctor had to say to us. I did what I only knew to do; I took a moment to go into the restroom and began to pray! This was the first time in my life I could recall giving up my will (that she lives) and asking if it’s the Lord’s will that she hasn’t made it, that He PLEASE help me and my brother, Shawn to heal and understand His decision I came out of the restroom and agreed to go in the ‘family discussion room’ There, they advise us that she is in a coma. That, IF, she makes it out of the coma, the damage from the stroke could leave her in a vegetative statenot able to speak, nor walk, no use of her limbs, no brain activity, etc. Every day, after work and feeding my daughter dinner, I went to the hospital until visiting hours ended. I sang to her, prayed with her, massaged her, gave her pedicures, aromatherapy, etc. She had many visitors and we asked to sign in and send her little notes in a memory book as they visited. After about two weeks, God opened her eyes! They moved her to a rehab facility, where they were going to try to reteach her how to walk and talk again. We were coming up on my daughter’s 7th birthday on November 14 and I was talking with her about what I should get her for her birthday. My mother was getting better with lifting her left hand and pointing so we were looking at local store ads and she pointed to a doll she smiled at! I asked if she wanted me to get her a doll baby and she shakily said ‘BABY’! I was elated!! I was in tears! God had allowed me to hear my mother’s second set of ‘First Words’. I asked her to claim her healing and in faith, pick a date on the calendar that my aunt had gotten her for her hospital room to show me when she wants God to allow her to go home! She picked Thanksgiving! I believe it was 2 days before Thanksgiving, they discharged her to go home! We were taught how to spot her with her instability due to the paralysis on her right side that she suffered from the stroke. They came to the house and installed grab bars in the shower and showed me how to transfer her to and from the bed and bath. It was my goal to try to spoil her with whatever she wanted and to take care of her bills so she wouldn’t have to worry about another thing!

GRACE

Over 23 years of grace, the Lord extended to us in allowing us to see her flourishing and living her life and I am so grateful. I was working so hard to try to get a raise and promotions and make it up the corporate ladder so I could get her in a better home that didn’t have stairs she had to climb as she was getting up in age. She joked, ‘I’m almost 70 and I feel every bit of it!’ and we would just giggle! On Good Friday, April 7, 2023, the Lord called her home to a house with all the bells and whistles that even I was never going to be able to give to her. Days after her death, He revealed to me that she was His daughter, and He had all that already ready for her!

Most of this article was to shine light on this gem I got to enjoy as my mother. But to also ask that you 1) Enjoy your life and stop ‘waiting’; 2) Love those you have now; and 3) Be mindful of your body’s warning signs. Please read up on Strokes and take care of you and get help immediately! It’s a common thing in our families and we have to be wise about taking care of ourselves! *