The loo and the poo and the wee and the pee

Page 1

THE AND THE AND THE AND THE

LOO POO WEE PEE



Hi, I’m Linn. I’m 21 years old and poo all the time. I still enjoy poo jokes and probably always will. My interest for toilets is also above average. I’ve got Crohns disease. But fuck that, why grow up!


With Crohns dissease you go to the toilet a few more times a day than the average person, both in the middle of the night, and several hours before you would normally get up in the morning.



17.05

22.00

23.45

17.05

19.30

23.50

14.35

14.45

17.45

08.00

12.30

05.30

MONDAY

19.30

TUESDAY

09.00

WEDNESDAY

THURSD

04.00

17.15

06.52

06.52

10.20

10.20

08.26

09.11

19.39

08.15

12.36

11.36

14.50

09.24

10.16

21.03

12.36

14.38

16.33

16.33

16.55

12.35

22.27

21.14

20.48

18.58

22.44

17.40

17.15 19.39 21.03

23.02 My friend and I decided to make a toilet diary, where we wrote down if we peed, pood, and what time during the day we went to the loo. My friend is on the top and I’m on the bottom, brown is poo and yellow is pee.

21.24


23.39

22.00

23.35

19.45

18.25

23.45

16.15

18.35

14.05

18.15

09.00

HURSDAY

23.39

10.20

FRIDAY

14.05

13.20

SATURDAY

13.20

SUNDAY

08.26

09.19

09.19

09.48

09.48

12.15

21.37

16.04

16.04

10.08

12.09

15.57

23.38

22.13

12.09

15.06

20.36

22.28

15.06

23.15

23.29

13.20 12.15


HUMAN 3lb pr day


ELEPHANT 300lb pr day


CROHN WHAT? Crohn’s disease is most likely caused by an over­ active immune defence system. The immune defence system thinks that the digestive system is ill, and attacks the imaginary threat. Since the digestive system is perfectly healthy this results in inflammation, wich again results in pain, diarrhea, weight loss, vomiting, fatigue and several other symptoms not directly relatet to the digestion. It is a chronic diesease, wich means it’s for life, and may attack every segment of the digestive system, from mouth to anus. There is no known cure, but the course of treatment is to control the inflam­ mation and treat other symptoms.

Traces of inflammation can be found all over the digestive system. ESOPHAGUS STOMACH


SMALL intestine 4-6m LARGE intestine 1-1,5m

The more a section is inflamed, the more scartissue, and sometimes polyps, develops.This is narrowing, and in the long run, obstructing the passage and causes a lot of pain when food tries to come trough. The section before gets overworked and widened.

Diarrhea is very common, we celebrate each time we don’t have it!


72,4%


27,6%


SUP


MY PERSONAL -Clean -Discrete -Not crowded -Closed walls -Thick toilet paper -Disinfectant for toilet seat -Paper to dry your hands -Automatic sink and soap dispenser -Obvious flush button -Soundproof -Easy access -Easy lock

UPERLOO


THE ULTIMATE

SUPERLO -Clean -Spacious -Own sink -Closed walls -Good ventilation -Peg for your things -Disinfectant for hands -Disinfectant for toilet seat -Paper to dry your hands -Door goes outward -Thick toilet paper -Music


LOO


Month in hospital examined by MRI’s, CT-scans, colono­scopy’s, esophagogastroduodenoscopy. Diagnosed with Crohns disease, trying different medications

13.May 2002- admitted to hospital for abscess around anus, operated

End of June- home again with a mixture of 14 different pills. One which stopped my growth and made me gain weight

August 2002- school starting, collapsed on my way to the school bus due to low bone density, a side effect of one of my pills

Monthly controls at the hospital

Cutting down on medication, trying some new. Living life on 50%

Imuran working pretty well, life at 80% for three years.

November 2006- classmates ask me to stand up on a desk so they can see how skinny I am. Imuran has stopped working.

December 2006- Three days at hospital, trying out a new biological medication called Remicade, given intravenously every eight weeks.

Remicade works perfectly, life back at 100%, it’s awesome!

Spring 2010- awful skin rashes.

Autumn 2010-changes from Remicade to Humira. Same medication made differently and in injection form.You should be able to set the injection yourself, I can’t.

Humira works as good as Remicade, my mother sets the injection.

December 2002- turns 10 February 2011- Ate a green apple, indescribable pain for a day. Spring 2003- new medication, Imuran, making me have to take blood tests every week due to an extensive list of side effects. Scared the shit out of me since I’m afraid of needles after all the tests I’ve been trough.

April 2011- Ate two satsumas, same pain for two days. The ER tells me to take paracetamol, like I haven’t tried it.

MY CROHNS FROM DAY 1

December 2001- turns 9


August 2011- I got shingles as a side effect, had to stop injections for a time

August 2012- Got shingles again, and had to stop injections again

October 2012- Ate wholegrain rice, indescribable pain again

TO DAY 4400

Humira doesn’t work properly anymore, increase dose from one injection every two weeks to one every week

April 2013- new colonoscopy, my first one awake, not too bad actually! The transition to my small intestine is inflamed and narrow and has developed polyps

April 2013- intravenous iron supplement

August 2013- another colonoscopy to remove the polyps, this time the transition is too narrow to get trough. Discuss the possibility of an operation to take out this part as it’s the cause of all the pain

September 2013- move to England December 2012- Turn 20 Severe pain after every meal I eat, poop all the time January 2013- Last time I had solid poo, was so exited I had to call my Mother

Humira doesn’t work optimal anymore. Try out some other medications in addition

December 2013- CT-scan, shows an inflamed, narrowed small intestine and an overworked, widened part over. Turns 21

April 2014- blood tests isn’t getting any better, struggling to keep my weight, an operation is decided during the summer

Indescribable pain, no idea what caused it April 2013- intravenous iron supplement

Poop myself on my way home from a night out

Today- poop all the time, tired, stomach aches, but I’m still going strong!


DRUG ADDICT


3 pills a day 1 shot a week


The water on earth has been here since dawn of time. Does it ever occur to you that the tyou just drank is the same water that your Grandfather shat in?



PUB CHRIS


UBLIC NORWEGIAN RISTMAS PARTY On the countryside in Norway it’s normal to have public Christmas parties every day from Christmas Day til New Year’s Eve. These take place in quite different premises, everything from pubs to local assembly halls. And since everyone is home for Christmas and the age limit can be from 15 to 20, the toilets on these parties can turn out to be quite... interesting. When I came in to pee in this toilet there was a girl lying on the floor in the other cubicle, her blond hair and pink dress flowing over the floor and her shoes pointing out through the opening. I tried to ask if she was ok or needed help, but she only stirred and dissap­ peared and I didn’t see more of her.



“The flush toilet, more than any single invention, has ‘civilized’ us in a way that religion and law could never accomplish.” Thomas Lynch


The flush handle in a public toilet can have up to 40 000 germs per square inch.



HOW TO WALK IN THE LOO

WAY IN 1. First look. Take in what you see and plan your way from here.

2. Turn your feet to get the other way around and at the same time avoiding whatever that’s on the floor.

3. Position yourself by the toilet seat, pull down pants, sit down.


1.

2.

3.


6.

5.

4.


HOW TO WALK IN THE LOO WAY OUT 4. When you’re finished, stand up, pull up pants. 5. Twist on your foot to find flush button while still avoiding stuff on floor.

6. Get the hell out!


“Got in touch with my inner self today,


I will never buy cheap toilet paper again!� Unknown


CUB 4. 3.

5.

2.

1.


UBICLE DANCE Most people tend to choose the cubicle in one of the ends, thinking this is a safer choice since there is at least one solid wall.What they don’t know is that these are the dirtiest ones with most bacterias, because these are the ones most used. If you want a “clean” cubicle you should choose one in the middle.

1. I’ll take the inner cubicle, snug in the corner. 2. NOPE! Poo in the toilet bowl. 3. Maybe... this one, far down... naah, taken. 4. OOH, MIRROR! 5. That one! That one, yes, this is good.


70% WATER

10% INDIGESTIBLE FOOD 10% DEAD BACTERIA 10% FATS, SALTS, LIVE BACTERIA, DEAD CELLS, MUCUS


THERE CAN BE AS MANY AS: 100 PARASITE EGGS, 1000 PARASITE CYSTS, 1 000 000 BACTERIA AND 10 000 000 VIRUSES IN 1 GRAM OF HUMAN POO


When you get the urge to go to the toilet anytime, anywhere you get to see quite a few of them. Some better than others. Also, you tend to explore a bit when you get bored!



HOW LONG CAN YOU SURVIVE?



MEN


WOMEN


REFERENCES: Anything not listed here is mine. Information from: “52 things to do while you poo” by Hugh Jassburn

Information from: “52 things to do while you poo” by Hugh Jassburn

Intestine texture: http://www.ck12.org/user:dG9k ZC53aWxsaWFtc29uQGNhcnRlcmV0azEyLm9y­ Zw../book/NC-7th-Grade-Science/section/9.0/

Rain: “Rain on window” by David Wagner http://www.ck12.org/user:dG9kZC53aWxsaWFtc 29uQGNhcnRlcmV0azEyLm9yZw../book/NC-7thGrade-Science/section/9.0/

Information from: “52 things to do while you poo” by Hugh Jassburn


Information from: “52 things to do while you poo” by Hugh Jassburn Poo texture: http://www.cgtextures.com/texview. php?id=9522&PHPSESSID=c7d7361d4834350990 592dfc36ae2cf0

Information from: “52 things to do while you poo” by Hugh Jassburn



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