Dear Kiki

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Dear Kiki,

I miss having night sex. The Then of course there are the old stand-by kids are always home and are old techniques: Play loud music to drown out enough that they stay up past my the sounds. Give your kids hard labor (shovbedtime (10 p.m.). eling; cleaning the garage) to accomplish in

The other night I stayed up until the coast the late evening so they pass out early. Buy was clear and even texted my husband to them each a new video game they’ve been come upstairs. Then we heard one get up to wanting so they don’t leave their rooms for a go to the bathroom! It’s unfair! They never while. Or you could just try to be as quiet as leave and they never sleep! I’m not like those possible—it’s not a long-term solution, but people who can compartmentalize erotic feel- as a one-off you might find the switch-up is ings from fully conscious, walking-around, erotic. Get something to bite down on so you going-to-the-bathroom kids. I get skeezed by don’t scream; slow things way down so the the thought of them hearing sounds from the bed doesn’t creak. bedroom. No thank you! Any suggestions? Worst-case scenario, if you can afford it, —Under Observation book a night or two at a hotel. That might the day. Congrats! Maybe your kids are ways you can make your current escapades more like the ones you desire? Blackout cursleep in a bit), you might give it a try. sound frightening if you’ve been strictly Dear U.O., isolating during the pandemic, but charts of

Ah, privacy issues during a pandemic! risk factors tend to rank staying at a hotel Who knew that the greatest test of the modern as low-to-moderate, in the same category as era would be whether we can actually stand sitting in a doctor’s office waiting room and being around the people we love? Being having an outdoor meal at a restaurant. And trapped inside a home of any size with the the CDC has a list of suggestions to make same people for months on end is bound to hotel stays safer. Bottom line: PLAY LOUD MUSIC TO DROWN OUT THE SOUNDS. Where there’s a will, there’s a way. GIVE YOUR KIDS HARD LABOR (SHOVELING; Make sure you enCLEANING THE GARAGE) TO ACCOMPLISH IN list your husband’s THE LATE EVENING SO THEY PASS OUT EARLY. help in trying to solve this conunBUY THEM EACH A NEW VIDEO GAME THEY’VE drum; working on BEEN WANTING SO THEY DON’T LEAVE THEIR a problem together ROOMS FOR A WHILE. OR YOU COULD JUST TRY can provide some lovely moments of TO BE AS QUIET AS POSSIBLE. intimacy, even if it’s not the specific break even the least discreet of us. sire—and talking openly about both of your

You say you miss having “night sex,” needs and what you’re currently missing is which implies that you are, in fact, able to both sexy and invaluable to your relationship. find time to be intimate at other points during xoxo, Kiki attending in-person school; maybe you’re able to wake before they do in the morning. KIKI Either way, at least some of your needs are being met. That’s awesome! I know it’s not “enough,” but it’s worth relishing. Are there WANTS QUESTIONS! tains on the windows, perhaps? Questions about love and sex in the Iowa

Beyond that, consider setting an alarm. City-Cedar Rapids area can be submitted Go to bed at your regular time, wake up for to dearkiki@littlevillagemag.com, or a little midnight tumble, then conk back out. anonymously at littlevillagemag.com/ Disturbing your sleep schedule isn’t ideal, dearkiki. Questions may be edited for but if it’s a night when neither you nor your clarity and length, and may appear either husband has to work the next day (so you can in print or online at littlevillagemag.com. release you de-