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YOUR NUNCHI! Unleash

Got a case of foot in mouth? Brush up on your social skills with this ancient Korean art W henitcomestothetricky worldofsocialinteractions, haveyouevernoticedthat somepeoplejustgetit? They’retheoneswho alwaysseemtoknowexactly whattosayeveninthemostawkwardmoments, andatdinnerpartiesthey’lltopupyourwineglass beforeyou’veevenrealisedit’sempty.Theymaynot realise it, but they probably have excellent nunchi. Pronounced‘noon-chi’,itstemsfromKorean cultureandistheartofsensingwhatthepeople aroundyouarethinkingandfeelinginorderto createtrustandharmony. Thishelpstoavoidstickysituations,fromwork tosocialeventsandevenrelationships.EunyHong, academicandauthorofThePowerofNunchi: TheKoreanSecrettoHappinessandSuccess,takes usthroughhowwecanpractise nunchi and the benefits that come withit.

THE BASICS

‘For beginners, I recommend honing nunchi skills at work before trying it on friends or family,’ says Euny. ‘At your next work meeting, rather than being the loudest voice in the room, observe instead. First things first: who exactly in the room? Is e atmosphere ht or heavy? oes your boss ok like he has ad news? tudying your ork culture will ive you the nswers to the uestions you idn’t even know ou should be sking. Nunchi eans reading Jennie from Blackpink mentions nunchi in the K-pop hit Ddu-Du Ddu-Du

the situation and understanding that every room and workplace is different.’ Once you get better at reading a room, you can influence and change the mood. If you’re running a meeting, Euny suggests offering bite-size treats at the start –even just some mini chocolates. ‘Say (but don’t yell), “Hi there everyone, I brought [food item],”’ she explains. ‘Make sure you use the word “everyone”, which sets the tone that for as long as you’re in that conference room, you are one organism.’ Ask people to pass the snacks around rather than simply telling everyone to ‘help themselves’. The passing motion creates connection. ‘It’s a way of making people pay attention to others,’ says Euny. ‘This energy circle you’ve created is a powerful, unifying force that will make everyone cooperate better, be more interested in what everyone has to say, and increase the chance of attaining any goals from that meeting.’

GAME OF NUNCHI ‘Game of Thrones could also be called Game of Nunchi,’ Euny writes. While some characters like Tyrion Lannister (Peter Dinklage) begin the TV series with excellent nunchi, others like Sansa Stark (Sophie Turner, pictured) are forced to sharpen their skills to survive.

NUNCHI FOR LIFE

TEXT BY GABRIELLA DEL GRANDE ADDITIONAL TEXT BY AMBER BRAMBLE Having the ability to pick up on moods and behaviours before approaching people will save you – and the other person – from social embarrassment. ‘You can’t make a faux pas if you’ve read the room correctly,’ says Euny. ‘It also aids in reducing your social anxiety – such anxiety is often caused because you are focusing too much on yourself. This can be dissipated at least a little if you focus on plugging into your environment, and on everyone else in the room.’

Nunchi is also great for navigating romantic relationships. ‘People are terrible at expressing their real thoughts [in relationships],’ shares Euny. ‘This is because at tense moments like a fight, they feel vulnerable and worried their other half will take advantage of their weakness. Use your nunchi to sense what is behind their words.

‘If you keep having the same fight over again, it’s almost always because of something someone was afraid to say or didn’t know how to. Do something different. Read between the lines.’ FOR MORE Pick up a copy of The Power of Nunchi by Euny Hong (Penguin Random House, $24.99).