Real Life Meet the mega matchmaker

MATCHMAKER Meet the mega

Move over, Cupid. Emma Winterschladen is a one-woman human Tinder, responsible for fi ve love stories - and she’s not done yet

Ever since I read Jane Austen’s Emma, at 17, I’ve felt an affi nity with the heroine. Like her, I am a bit of a meddler. I’m nosy, bossy and insatiably interested in other people. I’m also a sucker for a good love story. But my success rate has surpassed my literary inspiration: I’ve matched fi ve couples, now all ‘long-termers’. Although I’m a fan of online dating –having met my own partner, Tom, through the app, happn –I think it’s a shame that the rate of couples ‘meeting through friends’ has dropped to 18 per cent.* Somewhere along the line, we’ve lost the community spirit of love. Seeking a romantic partner can be a lonely experience. When I was single, I wanted nothing more than to tap into my friends’ networks. I felt the world was brimming with people I could fall in love with –but friends were reluctant to ‘get involved’. We all have the power to connect people –and if we’re lucky, facilitate a real-life love story. I’ve seen the rewards, and nowhere more so than in my own dad’s life. After my mum died aged 45, Dad was left fl oundering. They’d been together for 27 years and Mum was the feisty fi re to his laid-back chill. Not only had Dad been ‘out of the game’ for 30 years, he had been actively (and stubbornly) pursued by Mum. I knew I’d have to bring that same headstrong energy to help Dad –when the time was right. And that’s the thing: matchmaking s be about manipulating or but simply about helping. Once you’ve made your m it’s time to step back and let their story unfold…

THE NUDGE IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION Robin, 61, and Helen, 58 Dad became a widower at 49. Even in the thick of my own grief, I deeply wanted him to fi nd love again. Three years after Mum’s death, he felt ready to dip his toe back into the dating world but didn’t know how. So, over a pot of tea, I set up an online profi le, cheekily naming it ‘DateMyDad’. The funny factor helped us navigate a painful transition. Just knowing that he had me and my brother behind him helped, he said, free him from the shame and guilt that can surround bereaved partners. It was a slow process, with months of dead-end exchanges. Until he told me he’d been for a coff ee with lady called Helen. W followed was a slow-b love and relationship mutual respect and compassion. Almost a decade on, he and Helen are still a couple. Robin says: ‘I feel very lucky to have a daughter who was so willing to accept (not to mention help me fi nd!) another partner. Ems knew before I did that there can be love after love – and both of them can matter.’ Robin and Helen found love after love

Real Life

Phoebe and Alex moved in together

Helen and Duncan ‘met’ on Tinder

Milla and Guy are now married

SPEEDY SET-UP 29, and Sophie, 29

en are you going to get me a girlfriend?’ friend Iain asked me on WhatsApp one ernoon. Before I could reply, a message om my friend Sophie popped up: ‘I am so D UP with boys!’ And just like that, the htbulb fl ashed. I scoured Facebook for

ir best photos and messaged them both. yeses pinged back. Three years on, ve relocated to Sydney together. ys: ‘Emma is the most unashamed, joyful tor of our relationship – it’s lovely.’

E CRAFTY AFTER-PARTY ebe, 28, and Alex, 28

s so handsome!’ Phoebe whispered as we loitered a party of a friend-of-a-friend. ‘Who? Alex? Shall I

roduce you?’ ‘Don’t you dare – it’s too embarrassing.’ engineered a moment with Alex. ‘Have you met oebe?’ I said, pointing her out. ‘She’s beautiful!’ ‘Shall I roduce you?’ ‘No! She’s not going to look twice at me.’ n the face of their lack of confi dence, I hunted down crush and we plotted an after-party. At 4am, walking treets with us, Phoebe and Alex talked – just a few from where they live together four years later. ys: ‘Emma set up the situation perfectly so that we know each other organically on our own terms.’

E TINDER INTERVENTION len, 27, and Duncan, 31 elen was recovering from a pseudo-relationship with man who’d just come out as gay, so I made her get

nder. I scrolled through and saw my friend Duncan. I wiped and a three-hour conversation between ‘Helen’ d Duncan followed. Duncan didn’t realise he was atting with me. Rapport established, I left Helen to it. onth later, they were messaging daily, but hadn’t met. hrew a party. Six years later, they’re still together. : ‘If it wasn’t for Emma downloading Tinder for d still be pursuing a gay man. And if she hadn’t at drinks party, Duncan and I would still be whether to meet.’

1 Make sure they want to be matched: There’s nothing worse than a presumptuous friend assuming that all single people want a date. If they do, however, make sure you understand exactly what they are looking for in a potential partner. WORDS: EMMA WINTERSCHLADEN © YOU MAGAZINE. PHOTOS: YORK PLACE STUDIOS. *DATING APPS UK STUDY BY YOUGOV/BBC NEWSBEAT E DOUBLE DATERS a, 29, and Guy, 31 y was the fl atmate of my then-fl ing Harry. new Guy liked my friend Milla, and vice versa. ey’d quietly clocked each other but nothing d happened. Soon after, we threw a house rty and Guy spent all evening near Milla. A fi rst e soon followed and, before we knew it, we

me a foursome, going on double dates. Harry didn’t last, but I like to think our relationship

he way for a more successful one: this summer, ed to celebrate Milla and Guy’s wedding.

Emma set the wheels in motion and gave us nce to go for it. She was our number-one fan.’ 2 Avoid blind dates: Setting people up before you’ve shared photos with both parties is a risky business. People like to choose their best photos, so ask them to send a selection (and then pick three that really capture your 3 Don’t force it: There’s a fi ne line between giving encouragement to two people who may be lacking in confi dence and setting up false hopes. Just because you really want something to work doesn’t mean EMMA’S RULES