tie's off his Rocker, but don't lock him up

irony- 2.a. Incongruity between what might be expected and what actually occurs. 2.b. An occurrence, a result or a circumstance notable for such incongruity.

(courtesy of The American Heritage College Dictionary).•,

3.a. John Rocker having his fate decided in an arbitration hearing presided over by a legal immigrant in the city of New York.(courtesy of Major League Baseball.)

Oh, this is classic American justice. For those of you who have paid absolutely no attention to anything so far this millennium, here is an introduction to America's favorite unfrozen caveman baseball player. In a recent interview in Sports Illustrated, Rocker, a relief .pitcher for the Atlanta Braves, ridiculed just about every race and social class except the filthy rich and the Amish.

He ranted about people on the subway. He ranted about people on the freeway. I mean, he really went full circle. He offended even more people than Chris Vesci and Ben Lunn combined in last week's Lo- quitur.

So Major League Baseball, the great purveyors of social justice in America. first considered, "Hey, maybe he's just plain crazy. Let's make him take some psychological evaluations, and then we'll decide what to do with him." This is a pretty far fetched concept in itself. If everyone who made a couple of bigoted statements was crazy, I would be spending a lot of time visiting my older relatives in the local asylum.

Well, Rocker was correctly found to be un-crazy. Now the question is whether Major League Baseball should suspend him, and if so for how long.

So here is my question: If I were, through some really big mistake, hired as a professional athlete, would I be allowed to write this commentary? Or would my employment by a sporting league take precedence over my first amendment rights?

Personally, I think that suspending Rocker would be setting a dangerous precedent. Alright, it's not really setting a precedent, as Marge Schott, the owner of the Cincinnatti Reds, was once suspended for a whole year for making statements less offensive than what Rocker said. The difference is that Rocker is a player bis team would have depended on. Schott took her dog out to poop on the playing field. It's not the same.

Either way, I don't like what suspending Rocker would symbolize. Yeah, he is obviously a dolt. He will probably never contribute anything good to society, and he should not be considered a celebrity. But is he dangerous? Nah, he's just ignorant. He's no more dangerous than any other white trash that you find every day on "The Jerry Springer Show." Forcing him to shut his fat mouth is dangerous.

The first amendment doesn't just apply to the good and the bad of America. It also applies to the ugly. Rocker's words are vulgar and ugly, but he has a right to say them. Columnists and social critics around the country have the right to denounce him as a jerk. If you take away Rocker's rights, how far behind are yours?

Our country was built to specifically not punish people for their beliefs. We can force somebody to learn, but we can't force somebody to change.

If Major League Baseball makes an example of punishing Rocker for bis opinions, the other leagues will most likely follow suit. And that would be a shame. What would the 80s have been without Charles Barkley's mouth making headlines in Philly? Would tennis have been as fun without the profane loudmouth John McEnroe?

Most fearful of all, would the NCAA eventually follow suit? It would be a damn shame ifl couldn't compete in track for writing a commentary that the powers that be felt reflected badly on their sport.

So I appeal to Major League Baseball: Don't condone what Rocker or others like him say, but don't censor it, either. Just let his teammate who he called "a big fat monkey" decide what to do with him.

Oh, and just one more request: Let Pete Rose enter the Hall of Fame already.

Chris Nie/en is the perspectives editor of Loquitur. If anyone tries to get him to shut his mouth, he will contact the players union before you can say "Loquitur."

Letter To The Editor

submitted by Aimee Somers

The apartments are falling apart---literally. I'm not necessarily talking about the Nazi Note Revolution implemented by Paul Weaver, otherwise known as the new Hitler. I'm talking about the structure of the complex itself. As a resident of the CAC for the past two years, I have witnessed the destruction that has taken place in the complex due to the irresponsibility of students and guests. I have also experienced firsthand the effects of the school's need to "throw up" the building three years ago in order to accommodate the influx of new, more diverse students (A.K.A. more willing to contribute crisp, green bills to ladorola's bank account).

The administration's number one concern was to regionalize the school and expand its facilities through strategic planning. It is evident in the complex's shoddy structural state that their planning was not strategic after all. Uneven ceilings, large settlement cracks, running, clogged, or broken toi- lets, and leaks in the walls and ceilings are common problems. Residents have also become accustomed to having little, even no water at all on a regular basis. My neighbors were told not to shower in their apartment anymore because within a short amount of time, it was going to fall through to the apartment below them.

Common sense would tell anyone that a building erected three years ago should not be experiencing these difficulties on a weekly or daily basis. Maybe it is time for the school to redirect their concerns to more important safety issues. I would rather feel comfortable knowing that I can sit and watch T.V. without it blowing up from the five leaks in my living room walls than knowing a guest has a permission slip to visit the building from our mommies and daddies away from home, the Resident Life staff.

P.S. Note to Stephen Lightcap: the word is S-T-R-A-T-E-G-1-C. Buy a Webster's and look it up.

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