SURGE 2016 Issue # 3 Fall

SURGE MAGAZINE

THE ZONE’S TEEN ART & LITERARY

Fall 2016

Kravis Children’s Hospital at Mount Sinai

SURGE

The Zone’s Teen Art & Literary Magazine of Kravis Children’s Hospital at Mount Sinai Fall 2016 Volume 6 Issue 2

Molly Haas-Hooven Editor-in-Chief Diane Rode Rebecca Wallace-Segall

contents 2 3 5 7 8 9 11 12 13 14 15 17 18 19 21 23 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37

SURGE STAFF

Co-Executive Editors Guest Teen Editor’s Note/Editor-in-Chief’s Note The Piers by Victoria Reyes Russell Mindich Ode to a Violin by Haemaru Chung/Art by Marian Cepeda Founding Editor The Girl Jadae by Jadae Smalls Jaclyn Damiano A Fish’s Backyard by Hailey/Photography by Alice Rosenthal Lauren Smith Me and My Friend Cancer by Marian Cepeda Sarah Yazdian All About A Nice Octopus by Dominick, Mario, & Isaiah Illustrate A Story!

Art Editors Photography by Annie Braun Carly Menker From Black and White to Blue by Gabriel Cooper Guest Teen Editor Teen Q&A with Art Therapist, Jaclyn Damiano Photography by Alice Rosenthal Elsa Bermudez Dreamsleep by Stina Trollbäck Abby Coleman Hard Work by Aya/Art by Shanzeh Scott Krier I Am: A Collaborative Poem Writopia Lab Writopia Writing Corner Design & Crochet Needles and a Flame by Maya Mitrasinovic Production Team Art by Artists of the Zone Art and Writing by Tyana Thanks to Russell Mindich and family, and to the staff of A Lesson Learned by Kharisma Williams the Child Life and Creative Arts In Circles by Emily Mondrus Therapy Department of Art by Stina Trollbäck The Mount Sinai Kravis Children’s Hospital.

Home by Nikia/Art by Stephanie Grossman Home Sweet Home by Emily Brinegar To view this issue online visit: Dear God by Ibby Weber www.mschildlife.org Art by Artists of the Zone The Child Life and Creative Art by Stina Trollbäck Arts Therapy Department Untitled by Carly Menker 1 Gustave L. Levy Place Wonders by Tyana/Photography by Alice Rosenthal Box 1153

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New York , NY 10029 212-241-8084

Cover art by Stephanie Grossman, age 17

Writopia Lab 155 W 81st Street Suite A New York, NY 10024 212-222-4088

M THE

FRO NOTE

TEEN GUEST

R

EDITO

Carly’s Poem is featured on page 36!

Writing has become a path for me to express my emotions and help others.

The primary job of writing and art is to evoke emotions, and if a piece does so, then it has completed its purpose. A picture speaks a thousand words; all words have power, and power is a catalyst for change that is necessary in all avenues of life. Writing and art is a way to address feelings instead of bottling them up and tossing them away to be dealt with later.

For all of my peers battling the war with our illnesses, writing and art are ways we can relay our thoughts, hopes, and dreams so that we can achieve our aspirations someday. Writing and art are physical manifestations of our own minds, and through artistic pieces we portray the things that cannot merely be stated. Through both of these artistic mediums, the ability to cope with the daunting road of life becomes manageable. I encourage those who haven’t tapped into their innate creativity to do so, and for those who already have to keep it up. You never know how the simplest ideas and emotions translate into beautiful pieces of expression. Keep writing, drawing, and photographing! You will thank yourself later.

Carly Menker, age 17 Guest Teen Editor Dear Readers, Welcome to the second collaborative publication between the Child Life and Creative Arts Therapy Department at Mount Sinai Kravis Children’s Hospital and Writopia Lab, a nonprofit creative writing program for kids and teens.

In the following pages you will find art and writing created by teens in the hospital and out, whose struggles, joys, friendships, and fears have inspired their work.

Often writing and artmaking allow the individual to work through emotional and physical pain. Other times the creative process can create a needed distraction, providing a sense of peace, relaxation, and comfort.

Perhaps reading and looking at the images will provide such an experience for you.

So take a moment and dive in. Let the words wash over you; perhaps they will inspire you to create as well.

Interested in contributing to the next issue? We would love to hear your voice and see your art!

Send any original writing to molly.haas-hooven@mountsinai.org. If you are interested in submitting original art, email lauren.smith@mountsinai.org.

Enjoy!

Molly Haas-Hooven Editor-In-Chief SURGE | 2

THE PIERS Blue skies, Tall buildings.

Oceans, Fresh air.

You feel the wind.

You smell freedom.

I taste strawberries.

Loud helicopters walk by.

I hear the waves spoosh.

There’s rocks.

You can see the Statue of Liberty.

The temperature is warm.

When I’m at the piers, I wish to get stronger and be brave all the time.

-Victoria Reyes, age 11

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Art by Victoria Reyes, age 11 SURGE | 4

ODE TO VIOLIN Four strings lined up Like a trained platoon Each a different voice And each a different tune G string is low D string is moderate A string mellow And E string high Like a crescent moon Its edges curve gracefully Like a snail shell Its scroll rolls playfully Its faces shown aplenty As strings and bow mingle Deep as the rolling sea Swift as an arrow I hear from you A musical reflection of me Violin, prickly and coy Best friends we’ll always be - Haemaru Chung, age 15 5 | SURGE

Art by Marian Cepeda, age 16

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THE GIRL JADAE Brown eyes, brown hair The one with the 3 siblings and thousands of cousins The girl who doesn’t really have friends The one who likes to have fun The one who always got a bun in her hair The fly one Who’s always eating The one who’s always on her phone The one whose favorite color is blue Yeah that’s her The one who -Jadae Smalls, age 14

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Photography by Alice Rosenthal, age 16

A FISH’S BACKYARD Swimming all day with my fins up high, Always wondering what it would be like to touch the sky.

So many different creatures below the water, as the day, gets hotter.

From up above I always see, different people just letting life be.

Deep down on the ocean floor, the coral reefs and seaweed are always a good tour.

The quietness and uniqueness of the ocean is what makes it a whole new world that people want to explore.

-Hailey, age 14

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ME AND MY FRIEND CANCER Cancer and I are one.

In the past months I was weak, and alone, until cancer came.

Now we are together, it’s a different relationship.

We are always fighting like sisters, we have very different personalities.

I’m active and athletic, cancer is slow, quiet, and dangerous, and lazy, but we try to get along.

One thing that brings us together is that we love competition.

I never thought she would be my friend, because friends are suppose to make each other feel good, and at times our fights get out of hand, she finds a way to bring me down.

I got used to it.

I sometimes cry, but I build myself back up.

She taught me something: “Fear is mental.”

And nothing hurts more than physical pain.

Don’t let yourself fall because someone said something to you.

Be strong.

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YO Y MI AMIGA CÁNCER Cáncer y yo somos uno. en los últimos meses yo era débil, y solo hasta que llego cáncer.

Ahora estamos juntas, es una relación diferente.

Siempre estamos luchando como hermanas, tenemos personalidades muy diferentes.

Soy activa y me gustan los deportes, cáncer es lenta, tranquila, y peligrosa, pero tratamos de llevarnos bien.

Una cosa que nos une es que nos encanta la competencia.

Nunca pensé que iba a ser mi amiga porque los amigos se supone que deben hacerte sentir bien y, a veces nuestras peleas se salen de la mano, ella encuentra una manera de hacerme sentir mal.

Me acostumbré a ella.

A veces lloro, pero luego me construyo a mí mismo de nuevo y me levanto.

Ella me enseñó algo: “el miedo es mental.”

Y nada duele más que el dolor físico.

No se deje caer porque alguien le dijo algo.

Sea fuerte.

Art and Writing by Marian Cepeda, age 16 SURGE | 10

ALL ABOUT A NICE OCTOPUS

By Dominick, Mario, and Isaiah

I

saiah, Mario, and Dominick went to the beach to swim and to play in the sand.

They wanted to eat PIZZA! And PANCAKES! And BURRITO PANCAKES! And HOT DOGS!

They were having a lot of fun.

They rested on their towels under the umbrellas. But before they could get their food they had to face…the Donkey Didi Octopus! It looked just like a zombie.

It was very large.

“GOOO GOOO GAAA GAAA!” said the octopus.

Isaiah, Dominick, and Mario had to get on a boat to get past the octopus.

Isaiah said, “Hey Octopus! How are you doing?”

Dominick said to the octopus, “You have to be nice. And you have to ask for the food. And you have to have a good brain. Can you please go back in the water?”

The octopus swam back home.

Dominick, Mario, and Isaiah got to eat all the food and were happy.

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Phototography by Annie Braun, age 12

FROM BLACK AND WHITE TO BLUE, THERE’S NO TELLING WHAT YOU CAN DO When I was a kid everything was black and white and me Darkness Thinking people loved me I was a little kid I was bad, got kicked out of two schools I changed my life around I learned I was stubborn I didn’t want to listen I lost people dearest to me I was good at some parts I could get away with anything I want But sometimes life has consequences Sometimes the people who love you the most don’t want to be around you Sometimes to fix the things is to fix you I’ve grown from getting anything I want, to getting less I have to learn how to be a responsible man I’m on my own I have to do it myself Because some things can’t last forever I was spoiled, rotten, like cheese But now Now I see if you better yourself…

Amazing brightness Everything is blue There’s no telling what you can do -Gabriel Cooper, age 18 SURGE || 14 14 SURGE

Teen Q&A Spotlight on Art Therapy This fall, teen artist and writer Marian Cepeda, (shown left) sat down with Jaclyn Damiano, M.P.S, (shown below right) an art therapist at Kravis Children’s Hospital at Mount Sinai to talk about her work.

Jackie provides supportive art therapy interventions at bedside to patients and families coping with chronic and serious illness throughout the pediatric inpatient unit, pediatric intensive care environment and outpatient dialysis clinic. Jackie received her M.P.S. from Pratt Institute in 2016 and joined the Child Life and Creative Arts Therapy Department in July.

Marian: What is the best part of your job?

Jackie: The best part of my job is connecting with different people and helping them incorporate art into their treatment at the hospital. I love getting to know so many people and hear so many of their stories.

M: Have you wanted to be an art therapist since you were little?

J: When I was 13 I was involved in the Girl Scouts. As a Girl Scout, I volunteered with kids and adults with Autism. In high school I volunteered more and started thinking about becoming a special education teacher. But I didn’t want to lose the artist within me. When I started looking at colleges I discovered art therapy. In my freshman year, I volunteered at an adult day care center and used art on a daily basis with the residents.

It was the hands-on experience of working with people who lived with complex medical conditions that made me realize I wanted to be an art therapist.

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M: How many years does it take to be an art therapist?

J: It all depends on the road you take to become one. I obtained my undergraduate degree in art therapy in four years and my masters degree took two. In order to practice as an art therapist a masters degree is necessary, which takes minimum of two years.

M: What is the first thing you notice about a child when you meet them?

J: I think their ability to connect with materials is the first thing I notice. I’m always happy and surprised to see how kids can connect to different materials and incorporate play so seamlessly into our sessions. I find that kids often connect more with the art making process rather than with talking. Often kids make connections in their art to home, their family, or themselves. I also notice hesitation. Sometimes it can feel intimidating to make art, and often patients are worried about what they are creating. So it’s often up to me to educate my patients during sessions about the importance of the process rather than the product.

M: Were you shy when you first started working?

J:Yes, I was definitely nervous at first. In the hospital, the rooms are where patients are temporarily living.You’re coming into their home, into their private space. Having the confidence to walk in and be myself took awhile, but with practice, the nerves went away.

M: What’s your favorite art to make?

J: Painting. Jackson Pollock is a big inspiration to me. I like to sketch out a scene and then take to an abstract level utilizing a palette knife or even my hands sometimes!

“Giving love, that’s what I think my job is all about.”

—Jacyln Damiano M.P.S.

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Photography by Alice Rosenthal, age 16

DREAMSLEEP

There’s that curtain.

The one that likes to swim a little, swell a little, billow a lot When you’re cutting the ribbon, the grand opening, there’s that curtain.

When you wake up

When you’re about to open your eyes

There’s that moment of no oversight.

No sight at all, except the sight of the curtain that’s about to fall.

Touch your nose

before you open your eyes.

Can you find it?

Or did you open your eyes already?

You’re about to rip down the veil.

You know what veil.

That one that keeps you from dreaming when you’re awake.

The one that you’d rather be behind all the time because

dreams are pleasant, or not, or in between the extremities

(but usually extreme).

You like to scissor between bubble and trance and jump

from under to over like a dolphin that needs to pee but is

having too good of a time to stop breathing so often and

you’re ducking and dreaming just like that.

Just like That.

Like the fiddle flipping iguana that plucks his strings while

he sleeps because he’s broken the drapery.

You know what drapery.

-Stina Trollbäck, age 16

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HARD WORK I used to hate you.

When you called me I used to hide from you.

When you influenced others to talk me, I quickly made excuses to get away from you.

Afraid of the pain because I didn’t want to get hurt.

Reflection in the mirror, Shadow behind me, I take one step and you’re still ahead of me Sweat in my face Tears in my eyes I keep going I heard you tell lies.

Is there anything that you can’t do?

Now look at me, You made me who I am today Because of you I have this never losing, never giving up attitude.

Quitting?!

That’s not in my vocabulary.

When they quit I keep going.

When they sleep I work harder.

When they tell me that I can’t and count me out, I show them that I can.

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When they tell me about my dreams and they laugh, I make sure I laugh less.

I am a dream chaser.

It means I chase my dream, No one else’s.

Only I can defeat me.

There’s no losing.

I will not lose.

My dad was right about it, You do pay off, because of that I love you.

How can I not?

I’m no longer hiding from you, I’m waiting for you.

Where are you? I need you.

Because in hard work,

I TRUST. -Aya

Art by Shanzeh

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S EADER

ER TO TH E T O N

Dear Readers, Every few weeks, I collect lines of poetry from teens in the hospital to create one large group poem. We feature this poem on the Kids Zone TV show “Writopia Writing Corner.” I use a variety of Writopia prompts so that each person has the opportunity to express their individual voice. When taken together, their responses are like a pulse. Every few weeks there is a new pulse, and the colors, textures, dreams, and hopes that emerge are always unique. One day last summer, I gave the same prompts to teens attending a writing workshop at Writopia Lab and to teens on the floors of Mount Sinai Kravis Children’s Hospital. I combined their responses into the poem you see on the following page.

The poem was created using the following prompts: I am I thought I think I wish I crave I dream I know I love I will I hope you enjoy!

-Molly Haas-Hooven Writopia Lab Creative Writing Specialist Editor-in-Chief

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I AM I am happy, happy and smart Yo soy una niña muy valiente I am a Lupus warrior I am pretty I am independant I am positive I am me Creo que ser alguien mejor I thought I could fly but I can’t I thought that I could run really fast I thought the rain would never end I craved warmth, a puppy, freedom Espero que ser alguien en el futuro I wish I won’t have to come back here I wish everyone was, I wish everyone was happy about themselves I dream of a better day of flying to the stars Yo quiero ser una doctora I dream of an endless sky Yo se que ellos me extrañan mucho I know what’s right and what’s wrong I love without depth I love my brother I love the wind and the skies I will not fear I will change the world Voy a ser una mujer ejemplar en el futuro con el sueño de ser médico I will live an unscripted life I will walk up the stairs.

-Written by teens at Mount Sinai Kravis Children’s Hospital and by teens at Writopia Lab, July 2016.

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Use these pages to draw and write 25 | SURGE 23

Pintar y escribir sus propios cuento

your own stories and poems!

os y poemas en estas páginas!

Writers’ Corner 26 SURGE | 24

CROCHET NEEDLES AND A FLAME we stand still connected by our molecular bonds we are radioactive unstable like halogens helium hydrogen we stand still and the radiator is hot but the room is cold sodden with the tears you won’t let go and the salt is building up on the rim of your eyes like you are on the rocks jagged lines that I can’t draw straight and we stand still in front of a yellow candle that used to be shaped like a pine cone the flame flickers and I wince because I am scared of fire and I am scared of pain but you are only scared of forgetting so we stand still remembering remembering the crochet needles and the folds in her face and the house on the mountain with the olive trees to be split up and passed down generations so we all keep a piece of her earth forever 27 | SURGE 25

we stand still and on the radiator there is a picture grainy and faded and tattered at the edges pinned to a pillow a pillow she made it’s green was my favorite color and we stand still the pattern on the radiator cover is metal crochet and constant reminder of how she made it to 105 a constant reminder that I’ll make it in this house with the sunshine­ colored candles and tattered­edge pictures we’ll make it -Maya Mitrasinovic, age 16

Art by Artists of The Zone 28 SURGE | 26

I remember the nice white snow in the winter time.

I remember the cold breeze flowing through my hair.

I remember the image of all the trees with no leaves.

I remember having to wear lots of layers of clothes in order to stay warm.

Now it’s all gone because it’s summer.

Art and Writing By Tyana, age 13

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A LESSON I LEARNED TODAY Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve been so happy.

I grew up knowing right from wrong.

My dad has always been my role model and even through everything he’s been through, he always reminded me that my life doesn’t consist of worries, only happiness and challenges.

My mom grew up in a different element with hardships, but she still raised me and made me smile and believe every day.

I’ve always had a loving and supportive family and that’s what got me through today.

They kept telling me that I would be okay and not to worry and to always believe.

And I ended up being okay.

-Kharisma Williams, age 15

NO MATTER HOW SCARED I wished upon a magic star.

I wished I would’ve gone very far.

I ended up worried, sad, and scared, but they helped me believe, to be aware.

I counted on them to show me the right way to be And for all of that I became me.

-Kharisma Williams, age 15 SURGE | 28

IN CIRCLES I read somewhere, That kissing is a painkiller.

So I’ve been Sticking my tongue, As far back down my own throat as it’ll go.

When my lips, Dry with dead skin, Start whispering away with the wind Ghost stories for this love that should’ve been.

When we grafted tallies into our skin, As if we were tracking the score to a game, When our bodies became ashtrays, Making sure not to burn holes in the things around us, We’d only burn on the inside, Look solid someone touched us to find that we fizzle into dust.

Something bandages can’t quite rope back together, So that we’d have to keep a roll of caution tape beside us.

We’d plaster it up against our bodies In circles as tight as we could muster Just to call it a crime scene.

Please Step back, There is blood.

Something has been broken, Things have been stolen, We aren’t sure what yet.

We are still compiling this list of everything that was even here to begin with, Before we started filling our minds with furniture in a belief that it would make us feel more at home.

Though if you see something, Anything that might help us with the case, We might not know to ask for it, Because we don’t quite know what we’re looking for.

But you know the number, Give us a call.

-Emily Mondrus, age 16

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Art by Stina Trollbäck, age 16

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HOME My brothers, my cousins, my mom’s bed, my sister’s bed.

Brown rice, baked chicken with peas, broccoli.

My nephews playing around, running back and forth.

My neighbor knocking on the door.

When I look out my window, I see basketball courts, my friends.

I smell my aunt’s cooking, my neighbor’s soup.

I feel my mom’s blanket and my sister’s furry blanket.

Home is my life.

-Nikia, age 14

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Art by Stephanie Grossman, age 17

HOME SWEET HOME When I think of home, I think of the different animals that I see I see horses, deer, elk, antelope, rabbits I hear wind, it’s nice and quiet; it’s peaceful I smell barbecue, the leaves falling through the air.

If snow is melting on the grass, it’s a kind of a wet smell I taste lots of meat, I taste realness – it’s not greasy or fake I feel bumpy roads I feel free I feel little pieces of things blowing through the wind, my dogs brushing up against my arms and my legs.

-Emily Brinegar, age 14 37 | SURGE

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Art by Artists of The Zone

dear god, where are you? my whole life i believed that you were a phantom. you were as valid as an apparition or a pegasus. i never went to your masses nor did i attend your services in a temple. i never visited you in a mosque or thought about you on the daily. is it too late to find you? and if i did, would you even help me? why would you allow for your own children to be shot down? if you created everyone, why do you constantly tear apart the people who differ from your adam or eve? i need to believe in something. i would love to believe that you exist and that you would be there for me, but if i look towards you for help and i read your words only to find i can’t love both you and girls and you and people of other religions and you and myself 33 33 | | SURGE SURGE

Art by Artists of The Zone

why would i choose you? i want to believe that if i prayed enough i would finally be happy and satisfied. if it were just the two of us in a room, would you listen? would you care about me if i began to pray to you and you didn’t have bigger issues on your plate? i want to love you to follow through with my heritage to not need a reason behind the stars moving across the sky and the waves crashing by the docks i want to be able to say it is the will of god without thinking that massacring innocent people is also your will i will believe in you when california has a steady water supply when ISIS and the KKK don’t attack in your name when fourteen year olds don’t get diagnosed with cancer when north korea doesn’t threaten to use nuclear weaponry then i will believe in you but will you believe in me? amen -Ibby Weber, age 15 SURGE || 34 34 SURGE

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Art by Stina Trollbäck, age 16

She sits alone and wonders When is the end of broken dreams?

Her mind racing Never slowing its pacing How can she fix this?

Her carefully crafted world Shattered to the ground All in an instant Once tall and strong Now weakened and gone Her life is ahead Her hopes and dreams Still shining in the sunlight that awaits Each day The effort The thought The time

Breathe in, breathe out You can do it Believe in yourself Her lips twitch at the edges Slowly turning upwards Into a smile She knows she can do it It is just her part All along It was pulsing in her heart The future is bright She gathers her strength for the fight Stepping outside Into the light Her life awaits Just in reach She smiles, she can fix this It was herself holding her back.

Use it wisely, they said To transform her from the state of blue Smile, they said Take the extra moment

-Carly Menker, age 17, Guest Teen Editor

It will last you the while To blend together each component

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WONDERS I looked up at the sky and wondered what it would be like if I were floating on top of the clouds.

If I were able to fly with the birds and catch the breeze, Or maybe even communicate with them.

The sky is beautiful and I have a lot of wonders on it.

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-Tyana, age 13

Photography by Alice Rosenthal, age 16 SURGE | 38

"I have always found expressing myself through artwork to be a great way to cope, and hope that my artwork will resonate with other patients as well. "

-Stephanie Grossman, age 17, Cover Artist