“My Depression” by Ashely Rosario

My Depression

Ashley Rosario, 20

My depression was like my bestfriend.. Not the good type.. it was the bad. It would sit down with me even if i ain’t ask her to.. It would talk to me everyday & tell me things I didn’t really want to hear. She stayed with me for years. I would try to make her disappear. My depression was like my bestfriend. & Even though bestfriends shouldn’t make eachother feel a way , my bestfriend did . It would make me feel empty. It would make me feel stuck. It would make me feel like i was better off dead.. I tried to talk to her about it but she wouldn’t listen. Instead, she would come back with more power. She would come back louder .. My depression was like my bestfriend. . Even though we had bad days together, at least she would sit with me when I would cry on the floor.. & even though I wanted her to stop , she would be there, laying next to me , when I was feeling hopeless. She would would laugh at me, and scream. & I would just laugh with her.. but then cry when i felt like she wasn’t watching. Even though we had bad days together, she would be there with me when i felt lonely even if I was surrounded by my friends. She would remind me to go home because she knew I felt uncomfortable. My depression was like my bestfriend. But I got tired of her. I had to figure out a way to let her go.. & even though she wanted to stay , I told her that she would no longer have control over my life anymore. I told her that I was beautiful. & that I mattered. I told her that I no longer needed chaos. all i needed was peace. I told her that I would never listen to her again. I told her that I had power. & when I did she left.. she left me and never came back.. My depression was like my bestfriend. but never again would I let someone like that enter my life again..