Changeonemeaningfullifejan2013

How do people help you have a great day and a meaningful life?

Simple Surprizing Answers from your friends!

KUIS Sogo III Changing the World Class Publication January 2013

Edited by Tim Murphey

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Change the World

Sogo III

January 2013

KUIS

Quick Intro*** 24 students choose to ask the question on the front of this booklet and to interview their friends using shadowing, nodding, and other effective communication skills. The question stems from research in appreciative inquiry and positive psychology (see references at the end).

Another 4 people chose to teach happy songs to others and see what happened. The results were amazing. I want to read them again! I am very proud of these students and their unique ways of going about changing the world,one playful smile at a time. It has been a super class and wonderful learning experience for me! Kansha Kasha…Tim

Table of Contents PART I: Interviews 1. Smiling Brings You Happiness 2. Making People Smile Makes Life Meaningful!

3. A Great Listener is The Best Conversationalist 4. Smile, Laugh, and Call me Yoko!

5. Appreciating Bus Drivers and Cell Phones!

6. Good Listeners Are Good Friends!

7. All You Need is Friends! And talk!

8. Giving ‘Thanks’ 9. ~A Song, a Compass, and a Life~ 10. Small Things Can Mean a Lot !

11. Learning From a High School Student 12. Generosity and Listening Well are Contagious 13. Contagious Considerations Flower the World!

14. Small Things Make Our Day! 15. The Comforting Effect of Shadowing 16. Fun Talk, Help Talk, Smile Smile 17. A Smile Can Change the World 18. My Girlfriend’s Lunchbox 19. The Magic Words “Thank You”

Author Chiho Masunaga Seiko Nakano Miho Uemura Nana Kawauchi Fumika Nagahara Yu Nakamizu Maiko Miyazaki Yoshi Saito Rina Nakano Yuuta Moriuchi Tsubasa Moki Mayumi Hiki Asumi Tsuruoka Yumi Nakadai Arisa Misumi Arisa Sugano Saori Yabe Daiki Fujioka Riho Momose

Page 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21

20. Hello! And Thanks!

Shota Yabuuchi 22 21. My Friend’s American Life Yuka Yamagishi 23 22. Good Greetings Change the World!

Shunya Tokisaki 24 23. Quiet Time for the Self Mutsuko Sugaya 25 24. Meaningful Agency Sayuri Onuki 26 Part II Teaching Songsssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss 25. We are changing the world!

Maho Shoji 27 26. My “Young & Strong & Beautiful” Father Misaki Kamoda 28 27. Simple Songs Simple Happiness!

Naho Shioda 29 28. Smiling: Let It Show Your Way! Nobuki Sato 30 References and Postscript 31

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1. Smiling Brings You Happiness Chiho Masunaga I asked my friend Saki to help me with this case study. She and I live in the same apartment and she is very reliable. I met her on Saturday night, December 15th, in her house for this case study. It took about 30 minutes. I asked the question "What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?" and she immediately answered "Talking with me just like now, I'm very happy to be able to talk with you." I was a bit embarrassed by what she said, but very glad. Though I always intensely make eye contact when talking to someone, it was hard for me on that day. But I said thank you to her. She also answered, "They encourage me, they watch, teach and praise me, and they have a big smile. Oh, and they also are aware of a little changes and say thank you to me." I did not think that so many ideas would occur to her, so I was surprised.

On the next day, she responded by email to the follow up questions for the step two of this case study. To my question “Who’s big smile makes you happy?” she answered that “Of course my family’s and friend’s. And shoppers’ too.” She works at PLAZA and meets a lot of people all the time. She said “When a shopper said thank you to me for wrapping his/her present with a big smile, I’m very happy and can work harder.” To the question “When and who watch, teach and praise you?” she answered, “It is about my part time job.

When I started working there, I could not do anything because I didn’t know anything. Other workers taught me what I should do every time and I could become a better worker. When I could do good work, they praise me and it makes me more energetic.” To the question “What is an example of ‘aware of a little change’?” she answered, “For example, I am happy when my friends or teachers notice the new hair style or hair color. One day I changed the way of making up and my boyfriend said ‘cute’ to me. It was the happiest moment for me.” I was happy to hear that because she looked very happy while talking about her boyfriend.

To the question “Who encourages you?” she answered, “Mostly my family. When I am worrying about my school life, studying or job-hunting, my mother says ‘It’s ok if you do your best.’ I can be relaxed and happy when I hear the words.”

Through this case study, I thought that smiling is connecting to many kinds of happiness. People may have different answers to the question “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” However, at least my friend, Saki’s answer could not be happiness without smiling. The shoppers are probably smiling when they say thank you to her. Her part time job’s co-workers are probably smiling when he/she praised her. Her friends or teacher are probably smiling when they praise her new hairstyle or hair color. I think “smiling leads to happiness, let it show the way” is true. It is one of our strongest tools to change the world.

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2. Making People Smile Makes Life Meaningful!

Seiko Nakano I asked my friend who belongs to my seminar to the interview with me. This interview was held at our seminar class and lasted about 10 minutes. Her answer to “What do people do to help you have a good day and a meaningful life?” was “When people tell me the story that I haven’t heard before or people make me excited with something new.”

For her, it is interesting that she gets new ideas and the day will be meaningful. I asked in more detail like, “What specific stories do you remember?” She told me that when she decided to go abroad to study, she interviewed many people who had experience living overseas and she got so much useful information. She was very sure that she got excited about strange information and funny stories and it made her happy. When she started job hunting, one of the first things she did was to interviewed her seniors and get advice. First she gets information. Second, she makes herself strong with information and is motivated and encouraged with stories from others. And then, she goes and experiences it! I think this is how to she lives! Great strategies!

Also she loves to do something with her friends like camping, drinking, doing sports whatever. When she joins and collaborates on such events or activities, she can feel that she is not alone, like she is one of many in a large circle of friends. I asked her “Are you a person who feels lonesome easily? lol” she answered “I guess so.” I can understand what she thinks. Finally, I said to her “This was a bit strange as an interview wasn’t it? But have you thought like how to become a happy person?” and she answered “No, but now I’m coming up with the idea about how to be a happy person. A happy person has a sparkle smile and regard for others.” I do agree with this idea. Everyone has it but especially, happy people are good at showing their respect and behaving graciously and gratefully. I thanked her and give her some news about me about how painful acute gastroenteritis is. I hope she got excited with my story…;)haha As for me, the things people do to help me have a great day are when people rely on me or ask me some advice. I can be happy because I often ask someone advice with my life or troubles. That’s because I need others’ opinions and who I ask is usually an important person for me. What’s more, my part time job is selling clothes in a clothes shop and I always try to communicate with customers and try to have a good time with them while talking. When customers ask me about clothes like “Which color is better for me?” or “What do you think about it? “ I can feel I am needed. Some customers don’t need us so much, but there are so many customers that want an advice about their clothes. I am satisfied when they ask something to me. They make me happy with their happy faces.

From next April, my job will be with a company that creates new medicines. It isn’t about clothes. But I love this part time job pretty much. Because I can make many people smile ;)

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January 2013

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3. A Great Listener is The Best Conversationalist Miho Uemura I asked my friend, Natsumi who is third year student in KUIS to help me with this case study. I met her and recorded our conversation when we waited for a train at the station for about 10 minutes. I asked her a question “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” She could not understand what this question meant so I explained it for few minutes.

First, she mentioned her experience studying abroad in the U.S. When foreign people tried to understand what she was saying carefully, she felt they were very helpful and happy. They listened to her and focused on her words and asked her what she said if they couldn’t understand. Thanks to those people, she had confidence communicating with foreign people and could enjoy her life in the U.S. Then, she told me another example to answer my question. Her mother always helps her to have a great day and life. When she feels sad or angry, her mother always asks her “what happened to you?” and “Please tell me what are you thinking.” While she is talking, her mother says nothing but just nods and listens to her talking (Improv #3). She said that, “I become very happy after talking with her. She always just listens but she shows me her interest when I am talking. It is very helpful for me that someone listens carefully to what I am talking about and cares about me. So, my mother always helps me have a great life and meaningful life.”

After our conversation, I noticed that she often thinks that people help her to have a great day and meaningful life when they show their interests in what she is saying. This is because, during our conversation, I tried to shadow what she was saying and say “and” or “Yes” and followed up questions like “How did you feel?” and “What happened to you?” and “Give me some details”. I found that the more I asked questions to her, the more happy and animated she seemed to become. In addition to this, her answers to my question have a common point, someone listening carefully to her or paying attention to her talking.

Later I sent an email to her and asked about the above, and, actually, she agreed with my ideas. Through this case study, I found that people can have a great day and meaningful life when someone simply listens carefully to them and pays attention to what they are saying, and they can share their feelings with someone. Not only my friend but also I become happy when someone acts that way. As I learned in the Change class, I think saying “Yes” or “And” or “Great” makes people motivated to speak more because they see the listener likes or is interested in what they are saying. I noticed some important things to help someone have a great day and meaningful life: first, listen carefully to them and then show our interest in what they say. I want to try to do what I can to learn from these case studies to make others happy!

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4. Smile, Laugh, and Call me Yoko!

Nana Kawauchi I interviewed my friend Yoko at Lapaz for 30 minutes. I asked her “What can other people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” and got three interesting ideas. In addition, I asked her some follow-up questions and she answered them clearly. I am going to describe her thoughts below with my opinions.

First of all, she got confused because I suddenly asked the question “out of the blue” but she made an effort to imagine situations when she feels happy. First to come to her mind was, friends. She feels happy and has a great day when she talks and stays with her friends, including me! So “other people” in the question is friends for her. Therefore she has a great day and happy life almost every day because meets her friends at KUIS and her part time job. However, staying together is not enough, she needs smiling. Smiling brings her happiness! (We learned this from our previous class.) I totally agree with her because the conversation usually becomes gentle and mild when people talk and smile.

Second, she told me that laughing is also very important so I asked her the “What is the difference between smiling and laughing?” We talked a lot and defined the differences between them. Smiling works for the atmosphere, on the other hand, laughing works for our minds. When people laugh out loud, we can hear the laughing voice. It makes us laugh more and more. I watched a video of laughing woman on a train and laughing brought people who were on the train together. In the video, a woman suddenly started to laugh and other people also laughed a lot. Therefore, when we laugh a lot, it changes our minds. I talk a lot with her and I laugh a lot but I do not remember why I do so. I am so excited and laugh a lot without any reason. Talking + Laughing + Smiling = Good Relationships Third, she gave me an interesting idea: being called her by first name! And I asked her “Why?” (because I had no idea). She explained that in Japanese people have less opportunity to use someone’s name than English. For example, English speakers say, “How’s it going today, Nana?” on the other hand, Japanese just say, “Genki?” You can see the difference. Therefore, she feels special when someone uses her first name in any language. In Japanese culture if they are a couple or friends, then using first names is very natural, but they don’t do so among coworkers or with older people. Therefore, being called her by first name makes her happy because she feels unusual and special.

I interviewed Yoko and she gave me three ideas: smiling changes our moods, laughing voices creates laughing in others, and being called by our first names makes us feel special. All ideas were very interesting because I did not expect some of them. She and I have been nice friends almost three years and I could understand her more than before through this interview. During this interview, we laughed and smiled a lot.

I hope that I could help Yoko have a great day and meaningful life. Thank you Yoko!!!

HDPHYHAGDAAML?

Change the World

Sogo III

January 2013

KUIS

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5. Appreciating Bus Drivers and Cell Phones!

Fumika Nagahara I asked one of my friends, Konatsu to help me with this case study. She is a third year student in the English department. We became friends this year because we took the same class. I interviewed her on December 12th, Monday in a multi purpose room (MPR) for 10 minutes. To do this case study, I told her that I wanted to record our conversation but she is shy and refused to do it. Instead, she taught me not only the people who help her have a great day and a meaningful life, but also her favorite things that make her life great and meaningful.

Firstly, I asked her “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” First she told me the people who make her life great are family, friends, teachers and a bus driver. She chose family and friends because they always support her.

For example, her family supports her by doing housework and cooking. Friends support her by chatting with her or encouraging her when she is disappointed. Teachers teach her a lot of things like professional and academic things or the important things to know as a human, so they make her life better.

Also, she chose a bus driver. I think this is interesting. She has been using the same bus to go to school for six years and she is acquainted with the bus driver. She appreciates his safe driving. According to her, he is studying English, so the greeting when Konatsu gets on the bus is “GOOD MORNING”, (in English!) and when she gets off the bus, he says “GOOD BYE. TAKE CARE!” Thus, they make a good relationship. I thought it is wonderful and unique.

Secondly, as I said, she taught me what thing makes her life great and meaningful.

I asked her “Do you have any things that help you have a great day and a meaningful life?”

She answered, “cell phone” with no pause. She uses her cell phone to send mails, use SNS like Facebook, play games, and so on. Her cell phone is necessary for her life. Also, she likes to watch movies and she watches a movie at the end of almost every week. Especially, she loves to watch a movie with a cup of café au lait. Sometimes she studies English by watching foreign films. She said she could learn particular expressions in English. I do not watch movies so many times actually, so I will try to watch foreign films and want to learn wonderful expressions. In addition, her favorite food is squids and eating it makes her happy. She eats squids once every two weeks or when she is disappointed to cheer her up.

I can understand her feeling because I love chocolate and it makes me happy when I am disappointed. I think food has special power.

Through this case study, I could know new things about Konatsu, so I am glad. Also, I could have a good conversation because I used special skills; smiling, shadowing and adding questions even though I am not usually good at continuing conversations.

Especially, shadowing is important because we can understand well and also show the speaker that we are listening carefully. I would like to use these from now on not only in English but also in Japanese and recommend them to others. I appreciate Konatsu!!!

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Change the World

Sogo III

January 2013

KUIS

6. Good Listeners Are Good Friends!

Yu Nakamizu I asked my old friend Naohiro to help me with this case study. We have known each other since we were in elementary school. We had belonged to the same soccer club from eight years old to fifteen. We also went to the same elementary school and junior high school. Still now, we are good friends and we often meet. I met him in my house and we talked about 10 minutes on Saturday Dec 15. I asked him “What do people do to help you have a great day and meaningful life?” He replied that he is always influenced by the people around him. We are good friends, so he talked to me easily. I asked some follow up questions for him. At first, I asked, “How are you influenced by people around you?” At first, he said to me that it is not an easy question. He was silent for a moment. Few second later, he started to talk. Then, I paid attention to shadowing. He said “For example, my friends made good results in many fields, they are my old friends, so I don’t want to lose them!

Their achievements drive me. And I respect my parents and brothers. They have taught me many things, and they always encourage me.” Next, I asked “Who is your most important person?” He looked very shy, but he answered that friends and family are important for him, so he cannot choose only one person.

I not only shadowed his words, but I also paid attention to his laughing, and laughed when he laughed. At the end of conversation, he looked satisfied.

The next day, I sent an email to him, and I asked about this experiment. He said, “I did not notice these things, but I may do these things unconsciously. However, I think you did these things many times. You often do shadowing, nod, and laughing. I know you are a good listener, but it is the first time to see how you listen well.” Since he said it to me, I realized that I did these things unconsciously.

I learned many things in this case study. First, reacting to others is very important for a productive conversation. Thanks to our reactions, the people we are with can talk smoothly. In my case, I paid attention to shadowing, laughing, and nodding. They are very useful to be a good listener, and people can talk easily when I do them. Next, a good reaction in conversation is good for making a good relationship. If speakers think that listeners are good listeners, they can trust them more. Finally, it is important to have a good relationship with people around us. This time, I asked some questions from my old friend.

When I told him about this case study, he helped me immediately, so I appreciate him very much. Additionally, as he said, “We are always influenced by people around us.” I agree with him. People around me influence me greatly, including Naohiro. I have many good friends who I have known since I was an elementary student. Still now, we are good friends, and we will continue to encourage each other.

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January 2013

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7. All You Need is Friends! And talk!

Maiko Miyazaki I asked some questions to my friend, Yumi, from my freshman class. She is very kind and serious. We spent a lot of time together. We met at MPR on December 11th and we talked about 15 minutes.

First I asked, “What do people do to help you have a good day and a meaningful life?” She thought for a while and she answered, “Meeting and talking with friends.” I asked for more details. She said, “Talking to somebody and exchanging ideas is so helpful for me and other people’s ideas are different from mine. I learn a lot of things from them. These days, I have to think about a lot of things, about job hunting, so other people’s ideas are important.” Then I asked, “What kind of friends help you a lot?” She answered, “Of course all of my friends, but the friends from high school are very important. Because they are in different universities now, so their ideas are very different from KUIS student’s ideas. It is very stimulating for me.”

I asked, “What kind of things do you usually talk about with them?” She said, “Mostly daily things, but now we talk about job hunting and listening to each others’ ideas about job hunting is very important for me.” I asked, “How about other people?” She said, “Older women who work with me at my part time job are also important. They have a wide view and they give advice to me. When I talk with them, I am relaxed and happy.” I asked, “What kind of things do you talk about with those women?” She answered, “We talk about many things, for example fashion, love and job hunting.” Finally, she said, “The ideas that I learn from these people are very useful and it helps me to have a meaningful life.” Then I said thank you to her. She said, “I have never thought about these things. Thank you very much.”

After that I asked “How much do you help other people to have a good day and a meaningful life?” She answered, “I think many times. I want to help my friends as much as possible. I am willing to guide my friends the same as my friend do with me. However, I worry if I am able to help them.” So, I said, “You help many people, and I was helped by you many times.” She seemed to be relieved.

I found that people make their presence felt. So many people help us. I have a similar idea as my friend Yumi. Talking with my friends is a very important thing for me. I was able to get over many difficulties thanks to my friend’s advice. What is more, in my practice interview with my eiso class partner, she answered, “Doing stupid things, like dancing or joking with my friends.” From her answer and Yumi’s, I think friends are very important for people. Friends help us and make us happy. And I was surprised that friends are able to help just talking. I noticed and learned the importance of friends in this activity and especially talking with them about job hunting.

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8. The Importance of Giving ‘Thanks’ Yoshi Saito I interviewed my friend Ayaka in Lapaz at lunchtime. It took 20 minutes. She is my best friend and we have been together since freshman year. When I entered KUIS, I had no friends because I came from a different prefecture, so I did not know anyone. We always ate lunch together. She is good person and I respect that she can do what I cannot. For example, I am not good at building good relationships with a person who is hard to deal with. However, she has the power to make good relationships even if she does not like that person. Therefore, I wanted to ask the question “What do people do to help you have a great day and meaning life?” because I wondered what she would answer.

She thought deeply and we laughed because we never talked about such a difficult and serious topic. I was embarrassed a little and she said, “This is a first time I have been asked such a serious question.” Therefore I helped her, “You can tell first who helps you have a good day and a meaningful life and then how they do it.” So, she answered her parents, her grandparents, friends, and her part-time job’s customers.

I followed up asking, “Why do you choose your parents?” She answered “Thinking about money, my parents work for our family’s living, so when I was came to be 20 years old, I understood making money is so hard from my part-time job experience and the money is important for our life.” I shadowed her answer, and she could tell me more. I did not know she changed her thinking about money. I continued asking, “How about your grand parents?” She immediately answered, “I love my grandparents.” I said, “Oh, you love them?” and she said, “I could be happy just watching my grand parents. When I watch and talk with them, I feel healed.” To the question ”How about your friends?” This time is most embarrassing time for me because we are friends and she was also embarrassed a little but she told me “I have not so many friends. However, I always think, “My friends are ALL STARS.” So I think no one can break us up. I also like my friends as my family and I think friends are precious. So, when I communicate with my friends I am so happy and friends make me smile.” I was embarrassed by her answer, and I think I am a lucky girl because she makes me one of her friends. To the question ”How about your part-time job’s customers?”

She answered “I work at a bridal hall and I take charge of food service for the wedding guests. I like my job and have good experiences from it. When I serve some guests and they say “Thank you” to me, it means a lot. Only the word “Thank you” makes me full of vitality.”

When I finished this case study, I thought giving ‘thanks’ is an important point of our life because when we are said ‘Thank you’ no one gets angry or disappointed. According to Ayaka’s answers, when she was told ‘Thank you’ from her customers, she felt happy and she gets vitality. I think a word of ‘thanks’ changes ourselves, and the world.

From the Editor—“Thanks Ayaka and Yoshi!”

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9. ~A Song, a Compass, and a Life~ Rina Nakano I asked my sister Yurie to help me with this case study. She is both my sister and my friend. I talked her on December 13th for this case study at home for an hour. I asked the question “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” Then she answered, “I LOVE Namie Amuro (Japanese singer) you know because she always helps me anytime, anywhere, with anything. Of course, I can’t meet her directly. However, there are a lot of magical powers in her songs, and she is the charm person for me. And I feel her voice has perseverance and sweetness. Singers’ lyrics have influence on many people including me, maybe not all the lyrics of a song but just one phrase.”

I thought my sister has a spell cast on her by this singer, and I was surprised by her.

I haven’t such a strong passion for a celebrity like her, so I found that way of thinking enviable. My sister said, “I respect her because she is gifted as a performer, and she makes backbreaking effort which is invisible. She hides the effort but we (her fans) feel her live performance directly in our hearts. It’s one of her charming points. So we (her fans) are looking forward to go to the live every year. I live for going there!!” I have never been to any Live, so I want to go a Live of Namie Amuro. I’d like to get these strong powers from her.

A day later, I sent Yurie an e-mail and she responded to the following question. I asked, “What’s her magical power?” She answered, “When I feel sad and hard, I always remain with her voice while I listen to her music. So she makes me happy and encouraged.

I think it’s important for us to live.”

I then asked her face to face, “Why do you become crazy for Namie Amuro?” My sister cried out “I don’t believe it!!!!! Why am I crazy for her? Unbelievable!!!! Are you sure?

OMG!! I don’t have an obvious reason about it. There is a great famous phrase “don’t think, just feel” you know. I just feel her personal magnetism. I recommend you go to her Live once!!!”

I’m sure that Yurie is a fanatic believer. (Hahaha…) As for my question, “What’s the difference between Namie Amuro and other singers?” Yurie said “First, many types of people come to Amuro chan’s Live, and we don’t perceive a difference from each other.

Second, I think she might feel the warm glow of the audience because everyone has the same heart for her. And …I will stop answering this question, because I don’t suppose that it can be described by anyone!!” I asked, “How do you need Namie Amuro?” She answered, “Namie Amuro is indispensable in my life. The reason is that she is a God for me. When I had a serious worry, I always listen to her songs and find answers. She leads me like a compass when I miss my way. I cannot live in the world without her, it’s sure I’m addicted to her. So it’s too late for treatment!! Hahaha.” While listening to Yurie talk, I felt that people have wonderful powers to lead others. People always want to restore their serenity, to balance their lives. People are helped by others (or songs, etc.) to live their lives. We live cooperating and inspiring each other.

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January 2013

KUIS

10. Small Things Can Mean a Lot! Yuuta Moriuchi I asked my friend Yuuki to help me with this case study in Lapas. He is my second year classmate and we took the same seminar. I met him on Tuesday (December 11th) lunchtime. I asked the question “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” “Do you have some experiences?” “Can you give me an example of a time when this happened.”

He answered after a few minutes of thought, “First, when I was running for the train, a twenty five year old guy held the door for me.” “So because of him you could catch the train, right?” I asked him and he said, “Yes, he was very kind.” I continued the conversation with watching his eyes. “So what else?” I asked, and he answered, “When my friend gives me snacks.” “Give you snacks?” I repeated. “Yes, it was before lunch time. I think my friend was so hungry that he couldn’t wait until lunch so he bought snacks. He sat down next to me and told me to eat. To tell the truth I was not so hungry, but I was happy.”

Then we talked about the Japanese custom in such situation. Japanese people often “read the air” (feel the atmosphere). In this case, he would have felt sorry because only his friend ate snacks. We agreed that this is a good custom. Yuuki said, “Another thing is the time when my friend is generous with money.” I respond, “What do you mean? Do they give you money?” “Of course not,” he said with laughing. “When we went out to lunch, someone pays all of the group’s bill and we each pay him our share. Sometimes, my friend tells me to pay only 300 yen even though my share was really 500 yen.” I said, “Oh, I understand. So anything else?”

Yuuki’s last one was, “When my boss gives me a bonus.” I said laughing, “Yeah, money makes us happy”. “Yes, but the reason was not only the money but also himself.”

He paused and looked at me. “Please continue” I said. “Ah… I am doing a part time job but I was not a good worker, because I sometimes made mistakes, and it took many times to do one task. Recently I think I don’t make mistakes so much and can do a task much faster than before. That is when that my boss gave me a bonus with saying ‘You did a good job.’ I was so surprised because I have never heard such words from a boss. At that time, his words made me much more happy than the bonus.” “Wow, what a wonderful story!” I said.

Through this case study, I found that human gestures, words, or expressions are connected to many kinds of precious things. All people may answer different things even if it is the same simple question. However, they feel the same heartful mind from another person. We cannot live alone; we need other people, and other people need other people.

The most important thing is to cooperate with each other and think of others. Small things can mean a lot.

HDPHYHAGDAAML?

Change the World

Sogo III

January 2013

KUIS

13

11. Learning From a High School Student Tsubasa Moki My case study is with Rin who is my cram school student. She is in the first grade of high school but when I asked her the questions, she replied with a smile. At first I asked her questions but she seemed not to understand so I summarized in easy words to understand.

She thought she was poor in English so she hesitated to speak English with me at first, but I said to her “If it’s difficult to express phrases, you can speak Japanese, I don’t mind.” She got angry and spoke no Japanese while interviewing.

Then I asked the question “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” she naturally shadowed what I said. Then she replied “I think everyone around me talks to me about their daily lives, it sounds normal, but it is the best way to know their personality.” She added, “And everyone smiles when I greet to them, and praises me when I succeed in some way.” She stared at my eyes and talked with a little smile though she is not good at making her face smile. She could answer very well.

Then, because she is not usually good at talking about herself, I asked the question “What do you do to help people have a great day and meaning life?” She paused. A few seconds later she replied, “I greet people even if strangers, unfamiliar people, cats and dogs.” I laughed because of her answer. “So you smile more frequently in recent months!”

The first time we met, she was very blunt so I wondered why she smiled. “You taught that to me” she replied. I was glad and surprised how she changed. “Back to the original topic, do you have anything else for the first question?” I said. “People listen to what I say and reply with shadowing.” (In fact, Rin didn’t know what shadowing was and what behavior was shadowing at first.)

Then I added the question, “Can you give me an example of a time when this happened? When do you smile, greet, and reply.” She answered, “At first, smiling is always given in communication from greeting to saying good-bye. When we smile at first, people give their smiles back. That’s simple but I couldn’t do it at first. Trading smiles helps me and people to happily relate to each other.” I asked about greetings and Rin replied, “I try to greet first, so when the greeting comes back, I am happy because I think that people need me, and I can be people’s factor of power.” How about replying, I asked. “There are no differences between those two. Ignoring makes people sad, right? So replying, in other words, communicating helps each other. So we should not ignore people.” I was surprised and told her she is becoming such a great person. I agree with her and I thank Rin. I learned a lot from my high school student.

Note: Because I did not record her, I wrote this from memory and thus her English in “quotes” is much better than perhaps in reality right now and mainly for the readers, but I believe I captured her true feelings. She is improving quickly.

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KUIS

12. Generosity and Listening Well are Contagious Mayumi Hiki I interviewed my best friend Mai. She is very kind. So, I thought that I would ask her to help me for this assignment. We are not at the same university so I made an appointment to meet with her to have a dinner together on December 12th. I planned to ask this homework question when I met with her.

I asked her the question rather suddenly, “What do people do to help you have a great day and meaningful life?” She was looking me and “What does it mean?” Then I said, “Sorry it is my university’s homework so please answer this question.” Then she said “mmm,,, it is a little bit difficult to answer.” Then I said, “Yes, I think so.” She said, “I have an answer but it’s difficult to explain.” Then she tried to answer my question. At that time I nodded to say “yes” and “and” (improvisation: Morris 2012) and encourage her to talk.

When she talked to me, I listened carefully more than usual. Also I tried to shadow with a small voice (but sometimes my usual voice). I used shadowing like nodding. At that time, I tried to keep the conversation on the topic. So I tried to be curious about this topic so I could have many questions about what she said. Finally she answered all my questions.

When I listened to her answers, I felt comfortable.

During this conversation, she mentioned that she likes others talking with her. The contents are variable, funny and serious are both ok. And these things are meaningful thing to her. Also she said, “I like to know other’s experiences so I like talking with people.” That is to say, talking with people around her is good way to know other’s experiences. Then knowing other’s experiences is useful and interesting to her. Therefore she thought people around her become her ‘meaningful life’ I thought. It was an interesting thing for me because my answer is similar to hers.

For step 2 of this study, I sent an email to her the next morning December 13th. She responded to me that afternoon. For the first question I asked, “Do you want to do this with others?” Her answer was “yes, of course, with many people.” Then, I asked a second question, “Especially who do you want to do this?” She said she wanted to help people who do not think their problems are important or do not take them seriously enough and need to talk about them. Or maybe they just do not have someone they can talk to about their problems and so she wants to be available for them. I think that she is so kind. She really cares about other people and wants them to feel better through talking.

I learned important things from this activity. Generosity is contagious. We experienced this with RAOKs. Being helped by someone makes us feel thankful and we want to help others. Talking needs confirmation, such as nodding which is like saying “and” and ”yes”. And in order to continue talking requires questions. And the most important thing is listening carefully I thought (improvisation point #2: Morris 2010). If I did not listen, the speaker would not say anything. So gestures that express “I am listening” are important.

Such gestures are like looking at partners’ eyes.

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Change the World

Sogo III

January 2013

KUIS

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13. Contagious Considerations Flower the World!

Asumi Tsuruoka I asked my best friend Moeko to help me with this case study. She has been a friend since elementary school and she has worked at a flower shop near the Keisei Chiba station for two years. I met her on Saturday (December 15th) for this assignment at our hometown and enjoyed eating dinner with her. When I first asked her the question “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” she was silent for a moment and I let her just think. When she started talking, I paid attention to her, shadowed her a little and confirmed that I was interested what she saying. I asked a few follow up questions.

I tried to be extremely curious and use the 7 ways of improvisation. I asked the second step the same day. At the end of the conversation she seemed happier and cheerful than at the beginning.

Her first answer of what do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life was to be given kindness from not only friends but also her customers. She gave many examples to me. I introduce one example, a birthday present. This example is about me. She spent her birthday outdoors with her boyfriend this year and I knew about that. But I brought her a birthday present that is an accessory to her house and put it on mail drop. I knew that she wanted it because when I went shopping with her, she said, “It is so cute, I like it”. She felt happy about not only the present but also the kindness.

The second answer is to be said, “Thank you”. As I wrote, she has worked at a flower shop, so she makes bouquets for the customers. But she has worked only for 2 years so she has not had a strong confidence in her skills. In this June, she prepared big big bouquets for a wedding. That was the first time for her to be entrusted such a big job.

She was very nervous and felt responsibility because the wedding was big event of lifetime for bridegroom and bride. After the wedding, she was truly thanked for her beautiful and gorgeous bouquets by her customers. They said “Thank you so much. Our wedding will never be forgotten forever.” She felt what a worthwhile job it was! She was so happy and the words “thank you” sank into her heart.

The third answer is to talk with friends and get guidance when she has problems.

When she quarreled with her boyfriend, she wanted to talk about it to friends. To talk with friends is one of the ways to reduce stress for her. I think that most girls are the same.

When she felt stress, her face was dark. When she wants to talk with friends, she always calls them and eats dinner together. She enjoys the conversations and relaxes so she relieves some of her stress.

Through this case study, I thought that considering others is the most important to be happy not only myself but to make others happy. Smiling is also important but when we try to be kind and considerate, we smile naturally. It is unconscious! Like the contagious laughter of four year olds, adults’ contagious considerations flower the world. Be considerate and flower the world

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KUIS

14. Small Things Make Our Day! Yumi Nakadai I asked one of my best friends, Tomoko to help me with this case study. We graduated from the same high school and now she works at a company and also is a mother (she has a fabulous baby! Mira!) I visited her house and I talked around 3 minutes about this assignment and then I interviewed her for around 10 minutes. When I first asked her the question “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” I thought it would be a little difficult question to answer but actually she answered quickly.

During the conversation she mentioned that she liked it when people used her name to speak to her. She mentioned that in order to have a meaningful life she thought she needed good behaviour from others. For example she said, “Even if I and someone bump each other on the crowded train, it is better to behave politely to each other. But it is hard especially when my baby cries there. So I try not to get on the train with my baby but use my car instead.” I didn’t record our conversation but I remember that we had a meaningful time. And I did some shadowing. For example, see the following dialogue: Tomoko: I think people remembering each other’s name is actually hard to do, because I’m bad at remembering people’s names and faces.

Me: Oh, are you bad at remembering their names and faces? Actually I’m not good at it either.

Tomoko: But I had a good experience recently. When I was walking to the station last weekend, an old man called my name and said hello. I was surprised that he knew my name but I was very pleased.

Me: The old man called your name and said hello? That sounds a little bit weird but I think I would feel the same way.

For step two of this case study, she responded by email to the follow up questions: “What do you want to teach or tell your daughter to help someone to have a great day?” and “ What do you do to have a great day by yourself ?” On the next day Dec. 12 about lunchtime, she responded that she wants to tell her daughter Mira to listen to what her mother says and give her big smile to everyone. And for the last question she said that she sleeps a lot, eats a lot, goes out a lot and meets people a lot to have a great day.

In conclusion, I think behaving well toward each other is very important and it makes our day. If someone behaves badly, others might do the same (cf: mirror neurons).

However, it changes others, and the world, when we behave well and smile (cf: emotional contagion). Staying positive and acting generously even when others are not behaving well may be difficult, but it is a real game changer! It changes the world.

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Change the World

Sogo III

January 2013

KUIS

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15.The Comforting Effect of Shadowing Arisa Misumi I asked to my friend Rie to help me with this case study. She is a third year student in the English department and we know each other since we were in high school. I met her for this assignment after 5th coma and we talked about it while walking. She refused to record, so our conversation is just in my head. We talked for 10 minutes. First I asked her the question ‘what do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?’ She considered it a little and started to talk. I tried to shadow and listen to her well while she was talking. I thought she was able to talk comfortably because I did shadowed and nodded while she was talking. When I did them, she looked comfortable and talked easily. She was talking more when I shadowed what she said. I am not good at shadowing and listening to someone usually and she knows it. Therefore she told me she was happy and glad to be shadowed by me.

She told me what she needs to have a good day is breakfast made by her mother. She has low blood pressure so she is really weak in the morning and it is difficult to get up with good feelings. However she can wake up because her mother tells her the time to wake up and prepares breakfast for her. It makes her happy and the breakfast gives power to her.

In this conversation, she seemed happy when I shadowed. For example, Her: breakfast made by my mother makes me happy.

Me: breakfast?

Her: yeah, it is delicious and to give me power. I cannot wake up in the morning but she makes me happy.

Me: breakfast is delicious and gives you power! Sounds good! Do you tell her about it?

Her: no, but I want to tell her.

Me: you should! How is the breakfast good for you?

Her: I can wake up well. I have low blood pressure so I really feel bad in the morning.

Me: oh, you can wake up better because of it. If you cannot eat it, what do you think about the day?

Her: No way! I cannot go outside anymore!

Me: it makes you really powerful.

Rie said she could talk more easily because of my shadowing and listening skills.

The next day, I emailed to her and thanked her again. I asked her about my skills. She said she could talk easier than usual because I shadowed sometimes and listened to her well. It made her happy and she wanted to talk more because of my way to listen to her. In addition, she told me she thanked me because she noticed what a good way to listen to someone is.

In this case study, people can learn and notice how they can make people feel comfortable to talk more.

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KUIS

16. Fun Talk, Help Talk, Smile Smile Arisa Sugano I asked one of my best friends Saki on December 12. I’ve known her for almost 4 years. She is my first friend in Kanda University. Actually she transferred to a 2-year vocational school when she finished her first year here. Now she is working at a shop but we are still best friends and contact each other every day. We talk on the phone as much as we can. On Wednesday Dec 12 she was visiting my house and I remembered this interview.

I asked her to help me. She looked surprised when I asked “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” but she understood the question easily and responded smoothly. She mentioned 3 things.

Her first answer was daily conversation including greeting. She said just being talked to or talking to others is very important in life. If there is not any conversation, life would be so boring. Her next answer was talking. I asked how it is different from daily conversation. I thought it sounded the same as the first one. But she said she meant this one is more serious talk, for example, when we have a problem or when we are in a bad situation, you talk to friends, family or whoever your close people and they would give you advise or help you somehow. (Now I know this is called “confiding in others.”) She said that’s one of the important things that people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life. They tell you their worries, hopes, and secrets. Her third answer was smiling. About this, she just said smiling is good for no reason. That’s it! Smile makes everybody happy.

For the second step, I asked “To what extent do you do each of these things now with other people?” On a Likert scale of 1 to 6, with 6 being highest and 1 lowest, she said, 6 for normal talking, daily conversation; 4 for confiding in others; and 3 for smiling. She said she does daily conversation a lot because she is working so she needs to talk every day and greet people. The second one is 4 because she likes to talk. If somebody wants to talk to her, she would love to talk too, but she numbered 4 just because she is working now so she doesn’t have so much time to talk. And she said she wants to smile all the time, but when she feels down she can’t.

Then I asked, “To what extent do you want to do them more?” She said, 6 for all for them. She said she wants to do more of everything, but especially smiling. I asked why.

She said she realized she can’t talk more because she is working and she doesn’t have so much time now, but smiling is a thing that she can do whenever and wherever she is. So while she is working, she can smile and she can make people happy.

When I was interviewing her, I shadowed and repeated the last few words that she said to show her that I was listening. I do think that shadowing or follow-up questions are really helpful to get people to talk and show that we are interested and understanding.

When the interview finished she seemed happy. She was smiling, so I told her you are making me happy already. I want to smile all the time to make people happy too!

HDPHYHAGDAAML?

Change the World

Sogo III

January 2013

KUIS

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17. A Smile Can Change the World Saori Yabe I interviewed my friend Ayako who I have known since we were freshman; she was my first friend at KUIS. We didn’t get TOEIC score for Eigo-Sogo class, so we studied very hard and encouraged each other. We talked a lot about many things, for example, our families, boy friends and part-time jobs. I think we are good friends. I asked some question for her about this case study in Lapaz and did step 1 on Wednesday Dec 12th. I asked her the question “What do people to do help you have a great day and meaningful life?”

She answered the question right away with a smile. I shadowed and asked additional questions and we enjoyed laughing and talking. “To talk a lot with friends makes me relaxed and this time is precious to me. Especially I can tell various stories when I talk to you,” she said. I replied, “We always talk about our boy friends or our families. I always enjoy our conversation too.” She continued, “I can consult you about my family; I think you look like my older sister. You always listen to my troubles and you give me advice. I appreciate you!”

She no longer has her mother so I listen to her trouble instead of her mother. I always appreciate her too. She said, “When I’m in a difficult situation, I try to smile” I said, “I think to smile is important. Do you think you can try to smile every day?” She replied, “Probably I can’t do it, but one day my part-time job’s boss said ‘I like your smile because it cures my heart.’ I was glad to hear that, I realized that I can smile!”

She then added, “And I often go to karaoke with my friend.” I said, “You go to karaoke? Who is your favorite musician?” She said, “As you know, I love Ayumi Hamasaki.

I always sing her songs and going to her live is important for me. I really respect her, so I want to be like her.” I said, “These days, she is criticized about immoral love but do you love her?” She said, “Of course!! I follow her forever” I said, “That’s good! Thank you!!”

I know her difficult situation so she tries to smile a lot. I think to smile is important because it makes someone relaxed and warm like Ayako’s boss. I have often heard that it can relax someone’s heart. And talking a lot with friends or co-workers helps a lot. One of my friends often looks tired, but she looks happy and smiles when she talk with us friends. I think when we smile we can change the world.

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KUIS

18. My Girlfriend’s Lunch Box Daiki Fujioka I asked my girlfriend Yurie to help me with this case study. The reason why I asked her was I have good relationship with her and also she has taken Tim’s class. I met her on Wednesday, December 19th, in the evening for this case study. I asked the question “What do people do to help you have a great day and meaningful life?”

She talked about her family first especially about her mother. Her mother makes a great lunch box every day for her. The great lunch box is very fancy and her mother shows her support when her daughter has an important event, like an examination or job hunting. She showed me one picture. There was a lunch box which was written “Cheer up”.

She really appreciates her lunch box. She got terrible nervous and high pressure when she took a final interview for JAL where she wanted to work. But she relaxed when she opened the lunch box and she did her best at the interview. At result, she received notice of an informal decision.

Next, she explained about her friends especially about three of her best friends.

They have known each other since she was in elementary school so they know each other well. She has got a lot of advice when she has had problems and also smiles. Spending time with them makes her makes smile more than comedy shows do. Smiling is the most important thing for her to enjoy life. I was surprised and a bit sad that she didn’t mention anything about me. I hope that I can contribute to her meaningful life.

On the next day, she responded by email to follow up questions for the step two of this case study. To my question “Will you make lunch box like your mother’s when you have child?” She answered, “Maybe I will not!” The reason was she is not strong in the early morning. And she thinks that will feel troublesome. To the question “What activity brings your smile when you hang out with your best friend?” She answered, Spending time at Karaoke makes me smile, because we share many favorite songs among us. She also said, “Sharing what I like make me happy.”

To the final question, “Do you want to have more friends who are like your best friend?” She answered, “No, one is enough! Because I am already satisfied with my friendships, therefore making new friends is troublesome.”

Through this case study, I was surprised that her first answer to my question “What do people do help you have a great day and meaningful life?” she answered her mother’s lunch box. Though I predicted the answer about smiling because many people say the same. My girlfriend is unique.

HDPHYHAGDAAML?

Change the World

Sogo III

January 2013

KUIS

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19. The Magic Words “Thank You” Riho Momose I asked my friend Yui, “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” She and I met when we were first year high school students. We belonged to a boys’ soccer club as managers. We have had a very good relationship since we were in the same club. Our relationships have continued until today and we meet each other about once a month. We are students who have to do job-hunting, so our main talk is mostly about our future. We met on December 14th at the tavern in Nishichiba at 7 p.m. and spoke about this topic for 15 minutes.

I asked my questions in Japanese. Her answers were following the following: 1) When she was said thank you by other person.

2) When she was given chocolates from other person.

3) When someone smiled at her.

4) When she felt kindness nonchalantly.

I have known that she loves chocolates. I laughed loudly when she said, “I am very happy if I can get chocolates from others.” It was very funny for me. She answered above with nice smiling. Especially, she was laughing when she said number 4. I do not understand why she was laughing, but I did not say anything about that.

The next day, I sent her an email with some messages. The content of the e-mail was: “It was wonderful time to chat with you!!! Thank you very much. By the way, I have two questions about your answers. You said you felt happy when someone said thank you, gave you chocolates, smiled at you, and you felt kindness nonchalantly. First I want to know who the other people are: Your family? Boyfriend, friends, or strangers?” I received a return from her in an hour. She said that the other people were all her friends. I returned e-mail. “Thank you, Yui. The second question is what kind of chocolates do you want to get?” She answered. “Any chocolates are OK!! I love many kinds of chocolates.” I sent back an email, and said thank you for answering these questions and helping me with my assignment.

I sent an email to her with another question on January 8th. The question was “How often do you do the four things for other people?” She replied, “I work at a bakery at Inage station, so I always say thank you and show smiles to customers. I worked there two days a week, so I can do that at least two days. I have a boyfriend, you know? I try to show my kindness to him because I am very busy for job-hunting, so I care about him.” I replied, “Thank you, and I understand well because I have the same feeling as you.”

In conclusion, I found that everyone feel happiness when they are thanked. I also feel the same thing. Everyone loves the word “thank you”. I found it is a real “magic word” through this activity.

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KUIS

20. Hello! And Thanks!

Shota Yabuuchi I asked my friend Hiromi to help me with this case study. He is a Korean department student at KUIS. To finish this case study report we met at KUIS on Wednesday December 12. I asked him "What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” He thought a few minutes and started talking. While he was answering the question, I shadowed and asked follow up questions to help him continue. He listed four things.

First, he said, "People say ‘thanks’ to me to help me have a great day." He said he always became glad when he heard “thank you” words from someone. Second, he listed a fine greeting. He said every day we say greeting words, however, a fine greeting is a helpful way to make someone happy, he thinks. Third, he listed “kind action” toward him.

Finally, he listed “Someone helping me when I am in trouble. I will be happy and I think maybe almost everyone will be happy too", he said. We finished the interview and I said thanks to him.

He paused to reflect about this case study interview. He had never thought what people do to help him. So he thought that this case study helped to give a good chance to think about it. Also I told him I would email him about some follow up questions for this case study.

After finishing the interview, I sent an email to him and he responded to the question, "Have you noticed people doing these things?" He said many people who met him especially at the university greeted him and it made him happy. Also he said, "After finishing the interview, you said thanks to me and it was glad." I, too, was happy to hear him say I made him happy with my thanks. Also he noticed that his family always is kind to him and it help him to spend his daily life happily.

He also answered that he decided he wanted to say thanks to people more often because it makes people happy and also it helps him to be happy. Especially, he wants to say thanks to his family. He thinks he often is helped by his family, however, he has not said thanks very much. So he thinks he want more to say it more, especially to his family.

In conclusion, I thought through this activity, daily greeting and thanking words are important to help people be happy. My friend, Hiromi, said that when someone only said “hello” or “Good morning,” it made him happy everyday. Saying thank you and greetings are not special things and everyone can do it. However, it is the easiest way for us to make people comfortable. So I want to greet everyone and try to say thanks often in my daily life to make others happy. Hello! Thanks for reading this! And Goodbye!

HDPHYHAGDAAML?

Change the World

Sogo III

January 2013

KUIS

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21. My Friend’s American Life Yuka Yamagishi I asked my old friend Mizuki. She goes to university in the U.S. and we were in junior high and high school together. I met her at the Tokyo Skytree on December 17 because she came back to Japan for the winter break. We were in a restaurant and it took about an hour to finish the case study. I couldn’t record our conversation but I tried to shadow what she said as much as possible. When I first asked her “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful like?” she said, “It is first time to be asked such a question!” It was also the first time to talk with her in English and we hadn’t met each other for about half a year, so we really enjoyed our conversation.

About the question, first she mentioned that she liked to have delicious food. She lives in the dorm of her school but it’s really far from downtown. She said that it takes a half hour to go to the supermarket so she can’t eat healthy food. But in Japan, there are so many delicious restaurants, cafes, and shops, so she can have a great lunch and dinner.

She seemed to appreciate Japanese people who make delicious food at restaurants. So when I asked her “How much do you eat delicious food?” she said “every day in Japan, but not at all in the U.S.” This answer made me worry about her.

She also mentioned her friends and family. In order to have a great day, she thought she needed them because she misses Japan sometimes. For example, she talks to her friends on Skype once or twice a week when she has time. Talking to friends makes her feel better when she is busy with school. However, Mizuki and I had never had Skype time, so we promised that we would talk on Skype someday after she returns to the U.S. And also, when she gets a letter from her family, “I feel so happy” she said. She said that she doesn’t get the letter that much because texting is easier than writing letters, but she feels how much her parents and young brother love her. Especially she talked about her brother very much because he is still 10 years old and a little kid to her. She said that she keeps pictures that her brother drew for her.

Lastly, she said that she likes to hang out with her friends. I asked her “Do you hang out with your friends in the U.S?” Then she answered that she doesn’t go anywhere.

She lives really far from downtown, so there is no place to visit like a mall or department store around her dorm. She said if she had an international driver’s license and her own car, she would go shopping or go buy some food for her meals. I was surprised at her school life because it was totally different from what I expected. I felt sorry for her, but I was very glad that we were able to have lunch together again in Japan.

While we were doing this task, we talked about her American school life a lot. She seems to have a lot of difficult homework, but she never complained about it because she went to the U.S. to study what she wants. It really encouraged me so much and I’m really proud of her.

Through this conversation, I discovered that people who are close to you are very important for your life, and we cannot live without them. And I think we feel that so much

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KUIS

when we are far away from them. I also thought that my mother is very important for my life when I studied abroad. I don’t want to forget to thank them in my daily life.

22. Good Greetings Change the World Shunya Tokisaki I asked, “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” to my friend. My friend’s name is Daiki who is 2nd grade student of KUIS. I met him when we were 18 at KIFL and we transferred to KUIS 2 years ago together. In 12 December, I invited him to my house and I interviewed him. The interview lasted about 15 minutes. He gave me answers and I asked several follow up questions. I could learn many things from him. My imagination of him is always fine and cheerful. I could find why he always fine is through this interview. He might be good at finding happiness, so he is always fine.

According to his answer, he feels happy when he meets a great clerk at some stores. I asked the meaning of a great clerk. A great clerk means people who greet us cheerfully with big voice. He said they make him active. Then, I asked when is the best time for this to happen and he answered morning is the best. Especially, before going to college or a part time job, he thought that he also has to do his best if he meets them. I asked when else is it good for him. His answer is the end of a day, for example after classes or at a part time job. I asked why and he said he could feel the day was a good day.

I asked another question that is “What do you do to help people have a great day and meaningful life?” to him. He always greets cheerfully with a big voice and smiles when he has a part time job even when he is tired. He thinks he gives energy to customers.

Moreover, he also gets energy through doing that.

He had one more answer. If people do kind things for him, he gives them back the kindnesses with some additions. I asked what kind of additions? Additions mean, for example, if someone greets him, he returns the greeting in a big voice. If someone lends money to him, he returns it with snacks.

I said thank you to him and the interview was finished. I was glad to interview him because I could find his thoughts that I don’t normally see. I noticed that people can give happiness to others easily. Only tiny behaviors or words are all that are needed and we can find it connects to happiness. In addition, the happiness that you give to someone definitely comes back to you someday.

In my case, I feel happy when I find something new. I started my part time job a year and 7 months ago. It is first part time job in my life and my life was changed. At first, it was hard for me, but I could learn many new things and it was interesting. And also interviewing happiness to my friend like this was new for me. I could have very nice time.

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23. Quiet Time for the Self Mutsuko Sugaya I asked my friend Tatsuya to help me with this case study. He is a third year student in the Chiba Keizai College, majoring in economics. He goes to Chiba Keizai Junior College too to take some subjects as I do. One day when I studied with him (Thursday December 13), I asked him the question “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” I didn’t record our conversation. It took about 15 minutes. At first, he said “hummm….what do people do to help me have a great day….!?” and thought about the question. He seemed he have never thought or asked such a question before so he had no idea. After I showed him some examples, he finally could answer the question. As he answered, I shadowed what he said and asked a few follow up questions. At the end of the conversation, he seemed like he was satisfied with his answers. When I shadowed his answers, his opinions become stronger.

During the conversation he mentioned that he likes to connect to his friends and treats them well. He said to have a great life it is necessary for him to hang out with his friends. He said he tries not to get angry and tries to accept all people or what they say. The second thing he mentioned was keeping a promise so that people have a good relationship.

The third one was taking a walk at night and thinking about the problem alone in a quiet place. When he faces problems, or he felt depressed, he said he would take a walk and go to a quiet place like a park, then think about the problem. He said he would clean up his room if he wants to change his feeling. The last thing that makes his life better is taking a bath. He said he liked to take a bath so he can get rid of the pressure in his life. He said if he has enough time, he would like to take a bath at least twice.

In the conversation, I tried to shadow his opinions and gave some follow up questions. It seemed to lead him to talking more and getting enjoyment out of the conversation. Also it gave more confidence to his answer. For example: Me: So, what else do you like to do?

Tatsuya: umm….what else…what else….oh! I like to go for a walk sometimes.

Me: oh, really!? You like to take a walk?

Tatsuya: hahahaha. Yes!!

When I have some problems and feel that I want to be alone, I go for walk and think.

Me: So when you felt depressed, you would take a walk?

Tatsuya: Yes. When I walk in a quiet place, it is easy to think about the problems deeply.

Me: Oh, the problem deeply?

Tatsuya: Yes, it’s nice to sit down especially in the park. (Et cetera…)

For the step two of this case study, he responded by email to the follow up questions on the next day, December 14. His answers were very simple. For the first question; “In the last 24 hours have you noticed more people doing these things?” he said he had not noticed more people doing those things except keeping promises. For the

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second question; “To what extent do you do each of these things now with others?” he said three things: keeping promises, hanging out with his friends and trying not to get angry are the things he tries to do everyday with everyone. For the third question; “To what extent do you want to do them more?” he said he would just like to be with his friends more because that’s how he can be happy.

He said being with his friends all the time makes him happy. If he wants to be alone, he takes a walk at night. It is a very nice thing because he deals with his friends very carefully. He tries to spend time happily with his friends. I think it is a very important thing. I would like to do that for myself too.

24. Meaningful Agency Sayuri Onuki I asked my friend Misaki to help me with this case study. She is a fourth year student of Reitaku University in Chiba prefecture and she studies English literature. We were in junior high school together. I met her in a restaurant on Sunday Dec 16. We had lunch and talked while doing the first part of this case study. After I asked her the question “What do people do to help you have a great day and a meaningful life?” she asked me, “What kind of class do you take?” So, I told her “It is a class for changing the world!” and I said that we often practice juggling in class. Then, she looked curious about Tim's class. She thought for a moment, and started talking. In the beginning, we were embarrassed to talk in English because we haven't talked in English to each other since we were junior high school students. But we got used to talking in English little by little. While she was talking, I made an effort to understand what she said and shadowed and paraphrased her words and asked some follow-up questions.

She answered three things to my first question. Firstly, she feels happy when she get a present from her friend, family and boyfriend. She told me she recently got a watch from her boy friend. It is the watch she has wanted for a long time. So, she looked happy while she was talking about the watch.

Secondly, she said when she was sad or angry, her friends listened to her complaints and helped her. Actually I often listen to her complaints too. Thirdly, her family and friends were happy to hear that she passed the test when she was high school student.

After I heard that, I thought it is important for her to share happiness with her friends or family. I really agree with her.

For step two of this case study, she answered by email on Thursday January 10th.

For the first question, “In the last 24 hours have you noticed more what people were doing?” she said, “Yes. I saw more people noticing that I keep smiling, I think.” Her friends often say to her that she is always smiling. And, I really agree with that.

Secondly, I asked her “To what extent do you do each of these things now with other people?” she answered “Maybe a little. But, I think I often smile with you, right?”

Then, I felt it is sure. And, I felt again it is enjoyable to talk to her.

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Thirdly, I asked, “To what extent do you want to do them more?” She answered, “I ‘m happy that other people will be happy if they see I’m smiling.” Through this case study, I noticed that to keep smiling and not comparing ourselves to others, but to believe in life is important. To believe my life has meaning and I have an impact on the world is important.

PART II Teaching Songs

25. We are changing the world!

Maho Shoji I did this assignment with my mother. My mother is not good at English at all. To be honest, that was hard to teach songs to her, but thanks to her poor English skills, that was well worth it to teach, too. I taught her about “How are you?”

On December 14th, in my house, I taught my mom the meaning of “Super happy optimistic joyful and prodigious” in Japanese first. Once I taught the meaning in Japanese, she looked like was more willing to do it and “It became easier to memorize” she said. I was happy to hear that because that was what I expected! As I mentioned, she is not good at English, but the melody of “Super happy optimistic joyful and prodigious” used to be used by her alarm melody! So, she looked like she enjoyed memorizing. Next day, she said “Although this melody is my alarm melody, I can’t memorize!” I asked her “Which part is the most difficult to memorize?” She answered “Super happy…after these words.” Oh my, that is almost all!!! I taught her difficult vocabulary again and again and again especially “optimistic” and “prodigious”.

Next day, I asked her “Did you memorize all?” She said “Almost!” Her pronunciation was still strange, but it was OK! But sometimes she got in trouble to pronounce “optimistic” and “prodigious”. So my mother and I said these words together again and again. And I also taught “Make many mistakes, do it again!” in Japanese. Next day, she almost got all of “♪Super happy optimistic joyful and prodigious”. I’m really happy to hear her singing even with poor pronunciation. I said her to congratulation.

At that time, I got a taste of success, so I decided to teach her “five ways to happiness” because she is busy with work and house works. She always looks tired. So, I wanted to teach her how to relax and be happy easily. I said her “When you feel tired, do five ways to happiness”. Same as previous one, I taught her the Japanese meaning first.

She looked feeling relax even in Japanese! Then, I taught just five words, “Smile” “Breath” “Look up” “Sing” “Love” because I thought it would be easier to memorize. Next day, I taught all of sentences with gesture. Gestures make it easy to memorize. So she said, “It is easier than the previous one.” Since she did these five ways to happiness, she looked happier than before. I’m really happy to see that, too. At that time, I felt like “Even if I just changed one person, the world is better than before!” I felt the importance of, “When you change yourself, you change the world”. Even when one person has more power, it will be better than before, and can change the world!

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26. My “Young & Strong & Beautiful” Father Misaki Kamoda I chose my father, Masami to teach a song I learned in Tim's class. He is 55 years old, and He works at a Publishing company. I chose him for this teaching assignment because he looks tired recently, and also, he likes to study but dislikes studying English. So, I wanted him to be relaxed and enjoy learning English with the song.

I selected “Are you young?” because I think that the lyric is so fantastic. And I believe that the melody of the song makes him relax. When I heard this song in Tim’s class at first, I felt happy and comfortable. The lyric is “Young and strong and beautiful, I'm living an adventure, the world's so fascinating, it makes me wanna cry”. It is long but it’s easy to remember, I think.

First of all, I told him about this assignment and I sang the song, "Are you young?”, for him. After that, I taught the meaning of the words. He looked embarrassed but he said, “Interesting! I'll try to remember with words meanings.” I was glad to hear that. He seemed happy while singing the song, so I asked him to sing with me. We sang this song together at that time, and enjoyed it! The next day, I asked him, "Are you young?” and, he said only one line, “Young and strong and beautiful”. He forgot the other lines but he remembered the melody so he hummed it. So, I taught him the lyric again. He tried to memorize the song again. And I suggested that he sing it on the train (of course not out loud!) or at break time at his company. The next day, I asked him, "Are you young?” suddenly, he sang the song and he could sing all of it. Two days later, he asked me, "Do you have another song or thing you learned in your class?" I was surprised that he asked but I was really happy to hear that.

And I taught him how to juggle. I made balls with old newspapers and showed my juggling.

He looked like he was having fun! He could juggle soon, so I said, "Try to juggle and sing a song you memorized." On starting his singing, the balls dropped on the floor. But he looked like he was having so much fun and was so happy.

After I taught this song to him, he doesn't look so tired. He has succeeded to learn how to juggle! And I’m really happy that he is interested in learning English. In addition, he taught my mother how to juggle too, and she is also smiling. This time, I found that songs make us happy, not only the person who was taught it, but also people surrounded by the person. And teaching something also makes people happy!! Therefore I think songs and teaching can change the world!

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27. Simple Songs Simple Happiness!

Naho Shioda I chose my best friend, and I taught her two songs, “5 ways to happiness” and “How are you”. There are two reasons why I chose these two songs: I like both of the songs and she is not good at speaking English. She knows only “I’m fine thank you, and you?” for the answer of “How are you”? Therefore, I wanted to teach her some interesting phrases.

When I told her about this experiment, she seemed confused, because she is not a KUIS student, and also she cannot speak English well. However, once I sang these songs to her, she became interested in these songs, and she said, “I want to memorize these songs!” So I went to her house and stayed all night to teach her songs.

First, I taught her “super happy optimistic joyful and prodigious” I knew it was little bit difficult for her to memorize this phrase just by listening, so I said it slowly for her to understand what I said. Then I wrote it down on the paper to help her memorize easier.

After that, I taught her this phrase with singing. She knows the メリーポピンズ (Mary Poppins) which is a Disney movie, so I think it is easier for her to memorize than just any melody. I sang it three or four times while pointing at words on the paper. Then we sang it together. At the start, we sang it very slowly, and then we speeded up the pace of the song.

We sang the song over 20 times, and she seemed to be able to sing the song fluently, so I stopped singing with her. Finally, she could sing this song by herself without any help. I was really happy listening to her singing.

Then, I taught her the second song “5 ways to happiness.” It is longer than the first one, so it was difficult for not only her but also for me. So, at first, I taught her all of gestures: 1 smile from ear to ear 2 breathe in deep 3 look up at the sky 4 sing a melody 5 dare to show your love. Then I told the meanings of the words and it made it easier to memorize the song. I did not write them down on the paper this time because I wanted her to remember gestures more than words (TPR, Asher, 1977). Then I taught her these gestures and phrases one by one. I think it was very difficult for her to remember a lot of phrases at the same time, but she was enjoying singing the song. We sang a lot. Finally, she could sing alone. Of course she sometimes forgot the next gesture, so I would give a hint each time.

It took about four hours to teach her these songs completely. I was exhausted but really enjoyed it as well. I hope she enjoyed it, too. The next morning, when we awoke, I asked her “how are you?” and she said “super happy optimistic joyful and prodigious” I was so happy because she still remembered the song! This homework made me happy, too.

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28. Smiling: Let It Show Your Way! Nobuki Sato I chose my girlfriend whom I have known for a year. There are two reasons why I chose her. Firstly, it is easy to meet and contact with her. The other is that she is a KUIS student, so she is good at learning English. In addition, she has never taken Tim’s class. As I talked with her about Tim’s class, she was interested in this project very quickly.

On December 16, in my house, I gave her the handout which explains this project. I also explained the detail in Japanese and English, and it seemed she could understand.

She chose two songs; first one was “How are you?” The other was “Why do you smile?” I asked her why she chose these two songs. She answered “I have heard first song from my friend who probably has taken Tim’s class! Also I think smiling is very important to be happy, and now, I am researching some effects which laughing brings us, so I thought it was very timely.”

Next, I taught her the meanings of each song. The song of “How are you?” means that we should be positive and happy. If we are positive and optimist, the world will also change little by little. While, the song of “Why do you smile?” means smiling makes us happy and helps our health to become better.

Then, she started to try to memorize these two songs, and I also started to train and help her remember easily. I used the five strategies; chunking, singing, back formation, rhythm, and tie to routine day. When I learned them, I thought they were very good ways to remember something. That is why I wanted her to use them and know the wonderful strategies. After I explained all of the strategies to her, she said that she had never heard about back formation, so she would try it. This meeting took about thirty minutes.

Two days later, I met her and asked the two questions. She perfectly sang the song of “How are you?” However, she made a mistake while she sang the song of “Why do you smile?” She sang, “let it show your way.” I guess that she misunderstood the second song. I said to her that she should practice more! Then I advised “you had better teach these songs to someone. The handout says a great way to learn songs is to teach them to other people.” She understood it and said that she would try. The meeting took less than twenty minutes.

The following day, I met her again. This time, it took about ten minutes. Surprisingly she sang the two songs perfectly before I asked the two questions. We laughed a lot and this happening made us much happier. Finally, I asked her, “What are your feelings about this project? She said, “It was very fun and interesting. It was a good experience because I could learn a lot of ways to remember something. I want to use them in different situations!”

In conclusion, this project was very wonderful because it was very profitable not only for me but also for other people. I thought teaching something to other people is effective for students. I will use this technique whenever I can and I never forget this experience.

TM: Sometimes mistakes are interesting and teach us things, and they are magical!

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Some Important References

Anchor, S. (2010). The happiness advantage. New York: Random House.

Asher, J. (1977). Learning another language through actions: The complete teacher’s guidebook. Los Gatos, CA: Sky Oak Productions.

Atkinson, D. (2011). A sociocognitive approach to second language acquisition* How mind, body, and world work together in learning additional languages. In Atkinson (editor) Alternative approaches to second language acquisition. Pp143-166.New York: Routledge Brown, S. (2009). Play: How it shapes the brain, opens the imagination, and invigorates the soul. New York Penguin.

Dornyei, Z. & Murphey, T. (2003). Group dynamics in the language classroom. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.

Hatfield, E., Cacioppo, J., & Rapson, R. (1994). Emotional Contagion, Cambridge: Cambridge University press.

Morris, Dave (2012). The seven ways of improvisation. Victoria TEDx Murphey, T. (1990). The song-stuck-in-my-head phenomenon: a melodic din in the head.

System 18 (1) 53-64.

Murphey, T. (1992) Music and Song Oxford University Press (4th printing) 151 pages.

Murphey, T. (1992). The Discourse of Pop Song TESOL Quarterly 26 (4) 770-774.

Murphey, T. (2001). Exploring conversational shadowing. Language Teacher Research 5 (2) 128-155.

Murphey, T. (in press 2013). Adapting ways for meaningful action: ZPDs and ZPAs. In J. Arnold & T. Murphey (Eds.), Meaningful action: Earl Stevick’s influence on language teaching. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.

Whitney, D., & Troston-Bloom, A. (2010). The power of appreciative inquiry. San Francisco: Berrett-Koehler.

Post Script: Tim Murphey I have really enjoyed having these students in this special class, “Changing the World: One Playful Smile at a Time.” We had a lot of fun and learned a lot, me too! I learned that we should not underestimate the power of young people to go out and change others, to make their lives better, both their case study people and their lives! They are wonderful classmates for each other and I have no doubt they will continue to make the world a better place by helping others and making their own happiness contagious. They certainly have been a good influence on me this fall. Thank you so much. When you change yourself, you change the world. Dare greatly!

Tim :)*) “Reality is desperately in need of imagination.”

“Be the change you wish to see in the world”

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