JANUARY 2016 | 1
Chicken soup for the york soul JANUARY 2016: Vol. 21, Issue #05 www.macmediamagazine.com 004c McLaughlin College, York University Toronto, ON M3J 1P3 416-736-2100 ext. 60555
03
Editor’s Note
04
New Year, Same Me
05
Forgiving What Is Within
06
How To Have A Fresh Start In The New Year
07
Study Suggests Positive Outcomes For A New Medical Health
Executives Editor-in-Chief Web Manager Production and Layout Manager Social Media Manager
Janae Diaz Tatiana Prisiajny Eryn Tang Jordan Madeira
Editors News Opinions Features Arts Humour Sports & Health
Nick Catania Julia Alfano Jason Rivas Vanessa Butera Juan Lopez Tyler Drummond
Copy Editors
Tabitha Peters VACANT
Staff Writers
James Zhan VACANT
Clinic 08
How To Commit To Your Commit To Fit
10
Unravel
12
Beaches Be Crazy
13
Metal Keeps Me From Getting Mental
14
MacMedia’s Annual Anonymous Sex Survey
Art and Design Videographer Cover Artist Designer Designer Illustrator
Brandon Lorenzetti Kristen Chung Mary Anne Cruz Sandra Tacic Elizabeth Zhu
@MacMediaMag
MacMedia Magazine
MacMedia is a proud member of The Canadian University Press, a national organization of Canadian student newspapers.
2 | MACMEDIA
MacMedia is the official student monthly of McLaughlin College but does not speak on behalf of McLaughlin College—unless specifically specified by the Big Kahuna upstairs (in which case there’ll be a note). The opinions expressed herein are also not necessarily held by MacMedia or its staff (unless they’re really smart and dastardly written) but are a reflection of the current social outlook. Our goal is to act as an objective forum for constructive conceptual synthesis and intellectual thought—not as a community censor. Therefore, our content is only as strong as your contribution. Every month we publish a wide variety of studentwritten news, opinions, art, poetry, humour, fiction, photography, and everything in-between. Please feel free to contact us for any reason, including publishing dates, advertising, world domination, iguana preservation, puddle-pants, the whereabouts of Godzilla, or any other “topics of interest.” Please send all submissions and inquiries to macmedia.eic@gmail.com
EDITOR’S NOTE New year … Same MacMedia. No wait – better MacMedia – best MacMedia! Remember those Chicken Soup for the Soul books that you used to read in those awkward preteen and teenage years? There was Chicken Soup for every type of soul and somehow there was always at least one piece that stuck with you. It would strike you right when you needed it and possibly got you through some really tough times. That’s what we hope this issue does: helps you; gets you through some things and makes 2016 you, the best you. We want to offer you some guidance on how to better yourself, physically, emotionally, and mentally. Now, we know that “New year, new me” saying is 2016 years overplayed by now, but that’s not we’re trying to imply. Don’t remake yourself completely just because there’s a 6 at the end of the date instead of a 5 – just focus on you. Nobody can change their entire being when the clock strikes midnight on January 1st. You may not even want to change at all. That’s okay, too! You’ll probably break those New Year’s Resolutions by February anyway, so why not just get a head start and not make any? We know that it’s tough to change. If you’re dead set on having some resolutions though – which we totally support – then we’ve got some inspirational (we
hope) tips on how to make this your best year yet. Want to start on that summer body, but still attracted to chicken fingers? We’ve all been there. Start getting into shape by getting yourself in the right mindset. Grab a gym partner or get yourself into the hang of a schedule – we want to help you commit to your commit to fit. It’s a mouthful … Sorry. Towards the end of last year, you may have been noticing that some people were weighing you down. Eliminate the toxic people from your life. End that emotionally straining relationship. You don’t need to start the New Year completely fresh, but you’ll definitely feel better. If we’re being a bit too harsh, then take a breath. Relieve a bit of tension that’s come out of holding a grudge – forgiving people from your past helps you move on from the situation. Forgive what’s within. You’ll find that this issue may get a bit more serious than usual at parts and that’s okay. Sometimes it’s okay to be serious – that’s when you actually take in the words on the page instead of just skimming through them. We hope that some of these words help you get through this year.
Janae Diaz Editor-in-Chief
JANUARY 2016 | 3
New Year, Same Me Juan Lopez | Humour Editor Stop. I don’t even want to hear it. I already know what you’re going to say. It’s December 31st, you’re drunk as hell, and you’re starting to come out with this “New Year, New Me” bullshit. I’ve had it. I’ve heard the same drunk speech every year. You don’t change anything! You keep doing exactly what you’ve been doing all your life and then tell yourself: “Oh man, I’ll do it next year.” NO, YOU WON’T! So stop saying it. Stop it. Are you done? Okay, good. Because I’m going to tell you it’s fine to stay the same. Changing is just a waste. You can get wasted and not worry about what your New Year’s Resolution is going to be, because you should just accept who you are. Now, I know that sounds a little bad. “But what if I’m an alcoholic, or a drug addict, or a slut? I don’t want to be like that!” And yeah, those are pretty bad things to be, but if you’ve been telling yourself that you’re going to change 4 | MACMEDIA
every year and you don’t … well, don’t you see a pattern? Why don’t you just try to accept yourself the way you are instead of making empty promises to yourself? I have never made a New Year’s Resolution. Okay, that’s a lie. I have, but I’ve never actually gone through with it. So I stopped making them around the same time I started university. People focus on change too much. And yes, sometimes change is good, but sometimes it’s not. Think of your friends and family; they love you for who you are (I hope) and it wouldn’t work out any other way. Sure, maybe they want you to drink less or get better grades, or whatever, but that decision is up to you. Maybe you still want to change. Maybe you have a bad taste in your mouth just reading these words and want to sucker-punch me. But, hey, it’s the truth, and nobody likes to face it, but somebody has to say it. If that’s the case, calm down and I’ll try and help you out. Instead of saying, “I’M GONNA LOSE 40 POUNDS OVER THE YEAR TO GET A ROCKIN’ SUMMER BOD,” try saying, “I want to be comfortable at my own weight.” Conformity is a big part of making a New Year’s Resolution, and just because everyone else makes one doesn’t mean you should too. Hell, if you insist on making one, focus on things that are actually attainable. Maybe you won’t get a 95% average. Maybe you won’t grow to be 7 feet tall. But, hey, if you’re comfortable with your progress, then you can claim to be part of an estimated 2% of the world’s population that can say “I have accomplished my goals.” Aside from every rich person, of course. Listen: life is too short to concern yourself with changing every year. Why not make the best of every year and try to do it again the following one? Be comfortable with what and who you are. If you’re not, then don’t try and be a better person; be a better you.
you. In times like these, it is crucial to take the necessary steps to forgiving yourself, accepting the decisions you made in that situation, so you can eventually forgive anyone else and gracefully move forward with your life.
Forgiving what is Within Vanessa Butera | Arts Editor In the song, “Crystals” by Of Monsters and Men, singer Nanna Bryndis Hilmarsdottir says “I forgive what is within.” This lyric represents letting go of any regrets, accepting her whole self, and coming to terms with any decisions or mistakes she has made. The word “forgive” is key in this lyric. No, forgiveness isn’t only for those who practice any particular religion. Everyone can benefit from forgiveness in their lives. It is unpredictable when our lives will take a turn for the worse. Maybe you are experiencing a heart wrenching breakup after years of being with your significant other. Or maybe you are finally letting go of a toxic friend. Maybe you made a mistake months ago, but to this day you are still carrying the guilt and embarrassment with you. Or perhaps even that person in your life who you have high regards for disrespects you or betrays
Clear Your Mind The first step in achieving forgiveness, peace, and love is to take the time to process the entire situation for what it is. If something you hold close to your heart is suddenly taken away from you, it is not possible to just shut your feelings off like flicking off a light switch. Everything takes time. It is when difficult situations are still fresh that you take the time to assess your feelings and what exactly happened. This is especially not the time to lash out or make any impulsive decisions that may hurt you or someone else in the long run. Take as much time as you need to let things settle, and to sort your thoughts and feelings in order to face the situation with a clear mind. Forgiving Yourself Maybe more than one person is involved in this difficult situation of yours – an ex, a best friend, a parent, a sibling. At this point you have the clearest idea of where you stand in the situation, as well as what your intentions are. Well, everything played out a certain way and maybe it’s the opposite of what you were hoping for. This is beyond your control, but your perspective is completely in your control. Forgiving what is within means forgiving yourself. You cannot change what happened, or how others treat you in the aftermath, but you can forgive yourself and accept the decisions you made in the moment. Forgiving yourself is a brave and crucial step to growing as a person and moving forward. It shows that you are capable of standing behind your decisions. You are also aware that the decisions and mistakes you made were the best ones for you personally, so this saves you from any regrets. This way, you can achieve self-confidence, love, and respect. Because how can you forgive anyone else if you can’t even forgive yourself first? Forgiving Others and Letting Go Our minds are so powerful, but not powerful enough to change what happened or how others treated us. You can’t make someone want to be with you or feel remorse for the way they treated you. Whether the person apologizes or not, giving them your forgiveness is beneficial because the moment you forgive someone, you let go of any feelings of anger, hatred, or fear towards the person or situation. Feelings of bitterness are toxic things to carry with you through life. Refusing to swallow your pride and show forgiveness will just prevent you from moving on and enjoying the wonderful things that happen every single day. Forgive, even if you do not receive an apology. Because you may never receive that apology from the other person, and life can’t wait around for that.
JANUARY 2016 | 5
How to Have a Fresh Start in the New Year Tabitha Peters | Copy Editor Every New Year, everyone has resolutions and high hopes, but in reality, nothing gets fulfilled to the fullest, or something just doesn’t go as planned. People plan to have a fresh start in the New Year in a number of ways, such as starting a new relationships, being single, getting rid of some toxic people, changing their look, and having more plans for life. Let’s just say this is a way to cleanse and leave your past behind. When January comes around, it’s time to clean up your act. Say goodbye to all the Christmas decorations and hello to a New Year. I would advise changing up your look a bit; a New Year calls for something different – a positive change in your life. Some people don’t like change. However, they usually grow to like it. A new hair cut or colour would suffice, followed by a few new wardrobe pieces. 6 | MACMEDIA
Rearrange your room. Having a new setup in your room can give a new look and have positive vibes; nothing should be exactly the same as the year before. Buy a new poster for your wall or add some colourful pillows onto your bed. Drop the people who are always making your life a living hell. I would slowly distance myself and then make new friends – whether it be at school, work, or at the gym – along with still keeping the friends who are still close to me. Adios to that toxic relationship that’s been bugging you forever! It may be hard, but sometimes you have to put yourself first for happiness, no matter what the consequences are. Be strong and end things; your friends are there for moral support. A New Year stands for taking risks and being the bigger person. With that being said, ask out that special someone who you’ve been thinking about the year before. What do you have to lose? If they say no, just move on. No big deal. Starting a new eating plan. Right after the Christmas break, we will all be carrying some holiday weight that we’d like to shed for the New Year, and it’s good to look and feel healthy. Organize a list of what foods are good for your body, add more greens, and eliminate most carbohydrates. Simple exercises around the house such as: squats, push-ups, sit-ups, lunges, and jumping-jacks will easily show results on your body if you do them every day. Start going back to the gym if you plan on not doing so. For school, I advise to relax the mind before getting back into studying. It’ll all hit us like a boulder once we start attending classes again. Listen to some music, watch T.V., or just do something that calms you down. Have an organized schedule and write down everything that needs to be done so that you can keep on top of the work load. Having an agenda and actually using it is pretty crucial, but it’s a lifesaver. This year, try to fulfill your New Year’s Resolution list! Time is of the essence and if you don’t try anything, nothing you want to do will get done. This year may be harder than the last, or it may be easier; life is a journey and the only way to live it is by taking chances and letting the course of it flow.
Study Suggests Positive Outcomes For A New Online Mental Health Clinic Nick Catania | News Editor Does a new year necessarily have to mean a new you? We hear it all the time with New Year’s Resolutions – the want to lose weight, cut out a bad habit or change your overall outlook on the world. Resolutions can be a great thing, but they often die out and become forgotten as the year progresses. Very few people come to champion their prospects which only leaves them down in the mud, or rather, back in the same old mindset. University students and young adults are often keen to tackle these resolutions without reminding themselves of the bigger picture: mental health. We become swayed by people, new ideas and paradigms that challenge our thinking and widens our approach to the turning world. We use substances to alert, distract and escape the challenges that higher education brings without a remote thought of what these products are actually doing to our bodies. These actions may be the key to overcoming our preset resolutions while highlighting the bigger picture: a healthy mind. York University offers a wide range of services that cater to the mental and physical health of students across campus. The Mental Health and Disability Services (MHDS) unit at York offers personal counselling, groups and workshops, as well as peer support to help those suffering from depression, anxiety, and a variety of other issues that affect students. The province of Ontario has also boosted Good 2 Talk (1-866-925-5454), a free helpline devoted to post-secondary students that offers counselling via telephone offered 24/7. Whether you are on campus or at home, the help is there - you simply need to take advantage of it. However, with an increasingly tech-friendly world, the appearance of virtual mental health clinics may come sooner than you think. In a recent study focusing on service needs and priorities
for an online mental health clinic, researchers from Australia concluded that virtual clinics devoted to post-secondary students could provide the potential for positive outcomes. Researchers based their study on that fact that those seeking mental health solutions is quite low. “I think that’s a good idea,” stated one of the participants. “[...] instead of going to the counseling center in person, you could do it online so you feel more comfortable sharing details that way.” Having access to these services over the internet would provide private, high-quality care to those suffering from problems and thereby increasing the mental health of university students. Of the participants, 19 undergraduate students (ages 19-24) took part in focus groups that addressed the utility and acceptance of a virtual clinic, and the potential features offered to students. The results of these discussions highlighted the favourability of an online interface as students wished to connect with professionals and have helpful information passed on. The study concludes that the potential for these services is there; if you build it, they will come. While there were many benefits found by students over the prospect of a virtual clinic, privacy issues were also highlighted as a major concern. “If it was something student-based at a university that provided like everything, I’m not sure how much information I’d want to be giving,” expressed one of the participants. Online interaction will always leave a digital footprint, however the potential for strengthening mental health was widely accepted through these discussions. Based on this study, the accessibility of these clinics could come sooner than you think. STUDY: http://mental.jmir.org/2015/1/e2/ JANUARY 2016 | 7
How to Commit to Your Commit to Fit
Tyler Drummond | Sports and Health Editor
Every year when Christmas wraps up and New Year’s looms, people begin to make their New Year’s Resolutions: goals we have to try and make ourselves better next year. The most common New Year’s Resolution is to get in shape, with everyone flocking to their nearest gym to sign up and commit to fit. And yet, every year after the first month or two the gyms get emptier and emptier as many of the ‘Resolutioners’ begin to tail off and go back to their normal lives. But, that doesn’t have to be the case for everyone. If you find yourself wanting to hit the gym for the New Year, here are some tips for how to stay on track.
8 | MACMEDIA
1
Develop a routine Humans are creatures of habit and it’s important to set out a routine. Have days and times set aside for the gym and your different workouts so you have no excuses to not go. So many people use the excuse of “I don’t have enough time”. So if you build it into your schedule, you can never say you don’t have enough time. Once you build that routine, it will feel weird for you not to go to the gym anymore, as your body will be used to being there.
2
Start Slow Don’t try to hit all your goals in one week. Understand that these things take time and effort. It’s important to start slow and progress bit by bit as your body gets used to the training. As things become easy, you ramp it up to promote further growth. It’s also important to start slow to temper your expectations. Don’t expect too much too soon; that way you don’t get discouraged.
3
Change Things Up While this seems to go against the first point, it’s important to change your workouts up every so often. There comes a time where everyone hits a plateau with their workouts. Your body gets used to what’s it doing and therefore never needs to use that extra effort that makes your muscles grow or the weight melt away. So, change things up! Try another workout; try a different machine. It’s important for you to set a routine, but when it comes to your workouts, it’s important for your body to change things up.
4
6
Get Help There’s no need to go it alone. If you can afford a personal trainer, they can be very helpful for some people. But that’s not the only route to go. Find a buddy and get yourself a workout partner. Having a spotter can not only help you lift more, but they’ll help hold you accountable. They’ll push you through the rough patches and help keep you on track to your goals. Or go online and join a community of lifters or a workout group. Join classes at your gym and make friends there. Working out is always more fun in a group, and knowing you’re part of something will push you further.
7
Enjoy Yourself Most importantly, have fun! Working out doesn’t have to be a chore you have to do. It should be an activity you want to do. Make a workout playlist or find some podcasts you like. Figure out what workouts you like. You don’t even have to go to the gym; you can go outside and run, play sports, or walk your dog. There’s a lot to do and if you find what you enjoy, it’ll make you want to keep going with it, because you’ll enjoy it!
Visual Aids Visual aids can be a huge help for people who are working out. The idea of losing a lot of weight can be daunting, but if you make weekly and monthly goals, you can tackle it easier. Write these down or download a nutrition/ fitness app. When you put it to paper (or digital), you can see the actual progress you’re making, encouraging you to keep going.
5
Have the Right Reasons It’s important to make sure you’re doing it for the right reasons. Why do you want to change your body? Are you doing it for someone else? Are you trying to impress someone? This is a big commitment, so make sure you’re doing it for you, because that’s who matters. If you aren’t doing this for you, it won’t stick.
JANUARY 2016 | 9
UN RA V EL Jason Rivas | Features Editor
10 | MACMEDIA
“Man cannot remake himself without pain, for he is both the marble and the sculptor.” - Alexis Carrel I wasn’t really sure what I was going to write for this month’s issue. If you know me, you know that mental health is something that I truly care about. Some of the most important people in my life (both good and bad) are afflicted with some sort of severe mental illness like depression, bipolar, self-esteem issues and so on. This topic was something I could write a whole issue on, yet nothing came to me. Maybe some sort of self help guide? Maybe some tips on “overcoming” sadness? Nothing really spoke to me. I always came to the same conclusion: how does one ask for help? If you know me, you also know that I don’t ever like to ask for help. I complete school work alone; when I’m at work and I’m overwhelmed with orders at the bar, I will push forward; when I’m struggling personally, I will silently endure. When I have a problem, the words always seem to quiver out of my mouth, as if they’re scared of being heard. My problems sound stupid if I try to say them out loud, so I’d rather say nothing. All my life, I’ve wanted to be someone people could depend on – someone you could confide in; a twisted sense of strength and dependability which allowed for no signs of weakness or cracks in the armour. A real Superman! I pushed everything away because I thought that showing any form of discomfort would take away from me the one thing I truly wanted – to be loved. I shouldered my burdens alone because they were mine and I couldn’t understand why anyone should help me with my problems (even though I was always so willing to dish out help when asked). At some point, it all became too much, or maybe it had always been too much. I’m not really sure when it all began. I just remember a looming feeling always hanging around. As a child, I would assume it was just because I was tired. Even today, when someone asks me if I’m alright, I reply with, “I’m just tired.” That’s the easiest explanation I can give. But what is “that?” I remember spending a week writing a long text message to my parents explaining that I was not feeling well. I remember speaking to Dr. Allen two summers ago for an hour every Wednesday. I can already hear my fellow editors telling that this piece has not made any statement yet or it’s heading in a direction that may be too heavy, too sad – it does not convey the positive theme we’re going for, but I feel the impulse to say this. There’s no other way to say this: I’m depressed. The “it” is depression. Not the use of the word as an adjective, not some over exaggeration for a moment in time, but an overarching feeling that has remained with me every day of my life. This may not be the appropriate platform to admit this, but I touched on it last year during Bell’s #LetsTalk campaign. I tried pouring my heart out into 150 character tweets. As bad as that may sound, I wasn’t begging for attention nor was I trying to make a case to the pity committee. I honestly hate this; I’m ashamed of feeling like this. I admitted it because I felt like I had to. I was drowning. There were too many nights where I was ready to throw in the towel – too
many days where I just wanted to die. Putting yourself together is not as easy as throwing on a clean shirt and taking a long hot shower. It’s a lot of premeditated conversations, and mechanical movements, and a lot of saying “I’m just tired.” I was constantly trying to create an image of someone I wanted to be. I have always been conflicted with how I feel and who I am. I’ve often seen myself as a chameleon of sorts. I know how to adjust myself to the personalities around me in order to blend in to the social structure. Not necessarily being fake, but also not necessarily being completely myself. I just wanted to be loved by everyone. I just wanted to feel like I was doing the right thing by everyone. I was hiding away the “worst” parts of me. “Oh but Jason, we all do this complex social structure and defence mechanism thing that all creatures do and you don’t have to beat up yourself about it.” I get that, but it doesn’t change how I feel about it. There’s a proverb that says we all have three masks. The first mask, you show to the world. The second mask, you show to your close friends and family. The third mask, you never show anyone – it is the truest reflection of who you are. I hid behind the first two so often, trying to forget the third, trying to become the person I was trying to convey to others. I once sat in the McLaughlin College Council office as someone gave me a massage. They commented, “You’re so tense. Your body seems stressed. It’s the completely opposite of your usual cheerful and goofy self.” There’s no way of responding to that with the truth so I cracked a smile like I always do. That’s a lot easier than being honest. That’s a lot easier than ruining the image I want people to have of me, but deep down I know it’s the wrong response. Why? This small interaction occurred years after an important moment in my life. There was time when it became very dark for me. I was reaching a point of no return but suddenly I snapped.
Everything came crashing down on me in an enlightening way … if that makes sense. Sometimes, you have to let go to hold on. With shaky hands, I hit send on a text to my mom I never wanted to send. I began telling someone about all the things I never wanted to say. I began trying to let people in, even if it were just small footsteps. I began trying to love myself and the darkness inside of me. I accepted it not as some evil but as a part of who I am. What was the moment that inspired this sudden change? It doesn’t matter and I’ll tell you why. At the end of this long winded confession with no sense of direction, what was my point? I’m not okay and that’s completely fine I guess. It’s better to admit that you’re drowning while your head is still above water. It’s better to ask for help before your lungs fill with water. You need to learn to love the parts that hurt. You need to learn to grow and to love the struggle. I’m a mess and I know it. I accepted that my darkness has come to help make me who I am today. The best parts of me – like the empathy and the love I like to think I have – come from understanding what it is like to hurt and feel alone. It led me to the music that spoke to me, to sounds that made me feel alive, and to words that made me feel like I had a voice. It brought me closer to the people I loved; it helped me understand that no one is always happy – that the eternal euphoria I was seeking just isn’t real. It taught me that asking for help is not a sign of weakness. Asking for help is the most human thing you can do. If you’re going through hell, keep going. Do not be afraid to reach out for someone, something, anything. You’ll often find that there’s something else reaching out for you. The best advice I can give anyone is: ask for help.
JANUARY 2016 | 11
Beaches Be Crazy Julia Alfano | Opinions Editor
After a near-death experience involving a three-day-long Dawson’s Creek binge, one involving complete deprivation of food, water and/or dry shampoo, I began my quest to understand the correlation between emotional trauma and staring blankly into a large body of water. Anytime something went south, going to the pier was like going to the church in 1679 (that was a complete made up date, please do not Google that). To ensure my data was not biased, I sought out other cultural artifacts such as The O.C., Laguna Beach, and even Cast Away if you want to get technical. It appears that whenever things get a little rocky, watching some water just doing waterlike stuff (like being wet, etc.) has a mass soothing effect on our brains … which is kind of outlandish if you think about it. To check my findings, I went to the best online resource for certified, accurate information: Yahoo Answers. Most of the brain surgeons that submitted their two cents all agreed that because our body is mostly made up of water, it only makes sense that we would find it comforting. I found this really stupid, but found solace in the anonymous posting of one brave man who said, “Because it is dirty little water that needs to be spanked.” I have a feeling this post came from a 13-year-old boy, so maybe he has some insight into the minds of all these attractive teens that seem to haunt lakes, beaches, and the occasional puddle. This remark, however, quickly prompted me to look for something less teenage boy-esque on the internet, and was redirected to the Huffington Post. Wallace J. Nichols, a marine biologist, states that we all have a “blue mind,” as he puts it. 12 | MACMEDIA
“A mildly meditative state characterized by calm, peacefulness, unity, and a sense of general happiness and satisfaction with life in the moment” – that’s triggered when we’re in or near water (Huffington Post, 2014). So looking at said body of water is like being back to our default setting or “happy place,” which kind of makes sense because when I finally showered after my three-day-long Dawson’s Creek binge, I sure felt happy to see some of that wet stuff. Water induces some kind of meditation-like state, which I guess is like the poor man’s heroin. Whenever we feel overwhelmed or uneasy, being near water or even anything blue (which is the favourite colour of the majority of the population) helps calm all those thoughts and feelings of anxiety or tension. Though this seems somewhat obvious, it doesn’t hurt to remember that the next time the things in your life seem to be slipping away from you. Taking a hot bath, listening to some ocean waves playlists, or binge-watching your favourite California-bound trash television show may do the trick. The connection our minds and bodies have to the natural elements around us is both incredible and also kind of fucking insane when you think about it. I can honestly say that after my weeks of in-depth analysis of the link between water and/or Mischa Barton, that beaches be crazy.
Metal Keeps Me from Going Mental James Zhan | Staff Writer
When I was in high school, everything about university excited me—choosing courses, choosing my major, and finally being able to study something I was interesting. I thought it was going to be easy and fun, but God, I was so wrong. Perhaps I wasn’t wrong about the fun part, because I do dig the university life, but it’s not easy at all. When I was in my first year, I was told that it would get easier after that freshman status, but that was very untrue. Having finished the fall term in second year, I only know that things will only get harder and harder. Under great stress and challenges, one of the things that keeps me from going mental is metal, and heavy metal music. Heavy metal music is traditionally stigmatized as Satanic, aggressive, violent and noisy, which is quite ignorant considering that most metal lyrics are about society, life and emotions (and sometimes politics). There is nothing more efficient in fueling my brain and body than listening to those hysterical screaming vocals, distorted wall of guitars, and pounding drums. When I’m frustrated and exhausted from writing essays, and thinking ‘what am I doing with my life?’ the tunes of metal are like fresh blood, which makes me feel refreshed and pumps up my spirit. Metal music doesn’t directly give me any solutions for whatever difficulties I’m facing, but it gives me the courage and faith to stand up against them, and to battle through whatever is in my way. At some point, I had the thought that if for some reason I became unconscious, playing some metal music might actually wake me up. Lyrics in metal music are another thing that gives me
the strength to overcome the stress and to believe in myself. I have always aimed to study what I’m passionate about, not for the sake of being able to get employed and get money. I have sometimes questioned myself if I’m on the right track with doing the right thing, and try not to worry on what my future will be like. When that happens, I will think of the lyrics from metal song that goes, “Your normal life, 9-5, it’s just not for me. I need to feel alive! I won’t fall like the rest of them; they’ve come and gone with the wind.” It resonates with me so well that I have goosebumps whenever I think about it; it keeps me from unnecessary selfdoubting. I used to be confused when I saw religious people believing in their own gods so much, because I just didn’t understand how one can believe in something that is so abstract, something that science has proven nonexistent (in some way, I guess). I do suppose it’s the same with how I see metal music; it’s just something that gives infinite and powerful faith to me, which enables me to cope with difficulties and challenges in my life. Metal music is just like my religion.
JANUARY 2016 | 13
MacMedia’s Annual Anonymous Sex Survey Please answer the following questions as honestly (and dirtily) as possible, then either submit it to us online at macmedia.eic@ gmail.com or slide it under the door of 004C McLaughlin College. You can also find the Google Forms link to electronically fill out this survey on any of our social media outlets. We’ll print the anonymous results in next month’s issue – so get freaky! Sex: Male Female Prefer not to say Other: ____________ Sexual Preference: Male Female Both None Prefer not to say Other: ____________ How do you like it? (Select all that apply) Rough Sweet Adventurous Soft Experimental Passionate Self-gratifying Giving Not at all Other: ____________ How often do you like to get it on? 1-2 times a day 3-5 times a day 6+ times a day (you go, Glen Coco!) Every other day Once a week Once a month Whenever I can Whenever it’s in the moment Never
14 | MACMEDIA
Which movie title best describes your sex life? 300 I am Legend Home Alone Men Who Stare At Goats A Series of Unfortunate Events No Country for Old Men Failure to Launch My Best Friend’s Girl The Lucky One The Good, the Bad and the Ugly No Strings Attached Sex and the City How often do you watch/expose yourself to porn? Multiple times a day Once a day Once a week Once in a while This one time, at band camp … NEVER, you disgusting perv! Do you have a secret fetish? If yes, it is... Feet S&M Nipples Butts Role playing Hair pulling Body piercings Shoes Pee Other: ____________
Boobs or butts? Boobs Butts Are you a cuddler? Before sex After sex Occasionally If forced NEVER! Which of these demands are unacceptable from a sexual partner? Anal A “Golden Shower” (peeing) Anything poop-related (scat) Role playing Alaskan Pipeline (look it up!) WTF? ANYTHING GOES! What’s your favourite position? Missionary Doggy-style Cowgirl (girl-on-top) Reverse Cowgirl (nice view, right?) Lotus Spooning (the Lazy Man’s Swag) The Unknown Soldier The Spork Angry Thunder Mexican Halloween Scissoring 69 Standing 69 The Piledriver The Deep Sea Fisherman/Fisherwoman Colombian Handstand Other: ____________
What satiates your sexual desire most readily? Oral Hand stuff Intercourse Anal Nobody knows me like I do Sex should: Mean something Have no strings attached Lead to orgasm Be messy Only happen in a marital union Only occur for procreation Where do you most like to get it on?(Select all that apply) Bed Car Couch Public bathroom Private bathroom Plane (welcome to the Mile High Club, my friend) Stairs Classroom Desk Public park Public transit Back of an Uber
Carpet On camera Parents’ bed Not my bed (wink) On stage Shower Beach Hot tub Pool Against a wall Kitchen counter Furnace room Chair Tool shed Elevator Friends-With-Benefits are: Messy A natural part of life in our current society Risky Good if you don’t catch feelings Toys in the bedroom? Yes No On occasion Would you share your partner with a sibling? Yes
NEVER! If it’s a threesome, sure. If you had to choose one role-playing scenario to incorporate into your sexlife, what would it be? You’re both tigers in the bedroom – literally Princess Peach and Mario (to set the mood, you’ll play the Super Mario Bros theme song, obviously) Nurse and patient Teacher and student Cheerleader and coach Cop and robber Naruto and Sasuke Cosplay Does size matter? Yes No It’s how you use it It’s the thought that counts …Not really? No. I love small penises. Have you ever had sex at York? Yes No If yes, wanna tell us where? Share the juicy spots! ______________________________
Long Answer (You may attach an additional sheet for these) SLUT vs. PLAYER Elaborate on your personal musings of regarding this DOUBLE STANDARD. ____________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________ Short Answer Faking an orgasm is: a) Acceptable b) Unacceptable Why?________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________ What is your ultimate sexual fantasy? ____________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________ What is your most embarrassing/strangest/funniest sexual experience? ____________________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________________________ JANUARY 2016 | 15
16 | MACMEDIA