Sexuality and Sexual Health Risky Situations and Sexual Choices
How can you deal with difficult situations?
Is this a risky situation? Kelly
Okay.
I went out to the cinema with Kyle last week and today he brought me a gift and said, ‘for our future good times together’. I like him but I think he wants to get too intimate and I don’t know what to do.
Aretha Tamila
Cindy
Tell him that you’re not that kind of girl and he should look elsewhere if he wants to buy affection.
Ruby
Hey Cindy, do you and your friend want a lift?
I think you should just accept it and hope he behaves.
Assertiveness Key steps
• Speak clearly, be honest • Be respectful to the other and open, firm and direct. person; do not put them down, • Explain how you feel and criticise or blame them.
Come on Kelly.
how you see the problem. • Say ‘No’ if you need to. • Say what you want.
Activity
• Ask the other person how they feel.
• What do the boys want? • How does Cindy feel? What do you think about Cindy’s behaviour?
• Describe the facts and be specific. • Be polite and matter of fact and use humour if appropriate.
• How does Kelly feel?
Activity
• What should Kelly do? Go through the decision-making steps for Kelly.
• What do you think Tamila should do? • What should Tamila say to Kyle? • Role play the conversation when Tamila meets Kyle.
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I do not think ...
2
4
No, I don’t want to ... 6
You are a ...
7
Why don’t we ... instead?
Activity
You like him, don’t you? You want to stay friends with him, don’t you? Why not try being assertive?
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Saying ‘No’ – refusal
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Louis
It makes me feel disappointed that you want me to ...
No, I don’t want to because...
• Match each picture to the correct step in the refusal skills key steps.
Refusal skills
• Which picture shows behaviour not recommended in the skill steps?
• Say ‘No’.
• Discuss what you think are the most important steps in refusal skills. • With a friend use one of the following scenarios to role play refusal skills.
Imagine that:
Your boy-or girlfriend says they love you and wants to have sex. A close friend wants you to look at pornography on their smart phone.
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Key steps
• Use a strong clear voice, keep eye
contact, stand still and tall and make sure your body language also says ‘No’.
• Be serious, do not smile. • Repeat your refusal as often as necessary. • Explain why; give reasons. • Tell the person how you feel. • Suggest an alternative activity. • Do not criticise the other person; avoid sentences beginning ‘You….’
• Talk it through or, if necessary, walk away.
An older neighbour of the opposite sex invites you into the house when no one else is around.
Have I been in any risky situations recently?
A friend wants you to put a sexy picture on Facebook.
How could I be more assertive in my life to achieve what I want?