Editor: Yinka Sunmonu - Design: Thierry Lagrin The Voice supplement › page 21/22/27/28/29
START YOUR CONVERSATION
INSIDE:
› WHY
TALKING HELPS:
You are not alone • p22
›WE
TALK:
Segun Olotu
Supporting a friend • p27
› FINALLY:
Ex-footballer Leon McKenzie finds his voice • p28
MARCH 21 - 27, 2013
www.time-to-change.org.uk
www.time-to-change.org.uk
22 | THE VOICE MARCH 21 - 27, 2013
T
Sue Baker is the Director of Time to Change, England’s biggest mental health anti-stigma programme run by the charities Mind and Rethink Mental Illness, and funded by the Department of Health and Comic Relief.
he power of starting a conversation about mental health is really important for all of us. In fact, once you start talking, you might find out that more people have experience of the issues than you think. In last month’s edition of The Voice we started tackling the taboo around this very common health issue that currently affects one in four people in our communities. We’ve received a great response with many of you getting in touch and offering to distribute information on Time to Change through your networks. In this edition, we focus on conversations and the value that talking and communicating can bring to our society as support can be given and awareness raised (p22), friendships made (p27), and initiatives created, which is illustrated by ex-footballer turned singer Leon McKenzie who has become a mental health advocate and opened up the debate about the stigma of mental health problems in football (p28). One of the highlights of our recent work with The Voice has been an inspiring roundtable discussion with church leaders and representatives to look at the role they can play in starting a conversation about mental health and breaking down the stigma that still surrounds the issue. It was an honour to be part of this dynamic dialogue, which provided many thought provoking ideas on how to work together in the future. There are many ways to start the conversation about mental health and we look at various ways to approach the subject through the use of books, food, music and perhaps sending an e-card to remind someone you’re there for them (p29). We hope that through enabling people to start a conversation, we can encourage local communities to play a role in removing the stigma and discrimination that still affects the lives of many of us with a mental health problem.
Church leaders talk about mental health Church leaders and representatives from churches including House of Praise, Shiloh Worship Centre and Power Arena, joined in a roundtable discussion earlier this month to discuss learning more about mental health and using that knowledge to address the needs of their congregation, some of whom may know someone experiencing a mental health problem or may have experienced one themselves. It was an inspiring discussion where various creative ideas were considered to help start to remove the stigma around mental health problems. Ideas included: running mental health awareness courses for pastors and lay members; using the arts to communicate the subject of mental health creatively; organising an e-seminar; nominating lay members to act as a point of call for published information and resources on mental health problems; and establishing a forum to continue these discussions. “We must explain what mental health problems are,” said Reverend Nezlin Sterling, retiring General Secretary of the New Testament Assembly and a leading figure within the Black church. “The majority of people with a mental illness are those with life issues who don’t know how to deal with them. When we talk about mental illness, we often sensationalise it, which must change.” Given that mental health problems affect one in four people in any given year and one in ten children and young people, it’s time to start a conversation, something attendees acknowledged as they pledged to take the message back to their congregations. See page 29 for participants and creative ways to start a conversation.
Facebook: www.facebook.com/timetochange Twitter: #Timetotalk Youtube: www.youtube.com/timetochangecampaign
FACT Talking about mental health can strengthen friendships, aid recovery, break down stereotypes and take the taboo out of something that affects us all (Source: Time To Change) www.time-to-change.org.uk or Tweet #timetotalk
Why Talking Helps These people tell us why starting a conversation about mental health is important for all of us… PASTOR MOREJOY SAINETI
We can talk about mental health. We need to believe in the strength that we have as individuals and as a community and share the knowledge and the experiences. Healing does start with talking.
REVEREND DAVID OKORODUDU
A successful young solicitor took her life. I did not spot it as I thought she just had low moods. Another person was a friend. We went to the same church. This person came from a wealthy family and took their own life leaving a note. I’ve seen so much pain caused by the loss of valuable life. Talking and awareness helps.
HAIR DESIGNER KASIA FORTUNA
Talking is active. It’s one of the most powerful tools we have and we can start by asking ‘How are you?’
BISHOP DANNY BENNETT
Most of us speak from our experiences and knowledge but sometimes that has to go on the back burner. To bring a catalyst for change, we all have to come to the place to say, you know what, it’s among my friends, my family and my work colleagues.
BRIDES OF CULTURE
Discovering Time To Change made us realise that weddings can be the cause of extreme stress and anxiety. It’s easy to neglect one’s mental health at this time. Wedding and post wedding stress exist and can provide challenges for people with existing mental health problems. We pledge to embrace the Time To Change message and encourage people to talk.
GRAPHIC DESIGNER CINDY CHEUNG
The words “hello, how are you?” show caring and awareness and the way you say it means a lot especially if you want to encourage openness. I’m glad that the support I give through texts have a positive impact on the people I care about and it leaves me feeling good about myself too as I have reached out to them.
MORENA CAFÉ MARIANA DOS SANTOS
I come from a large close knit family in Paraguay (we can step into each other’s back gardens!) where we talked about everything. Friends and work colleagues can fulfill this role when you need it and knowing that you have support is important. Talking about mental health will help erase the stigma.
STUDENT THERESA FRIMPONG
The value of talking about mental illness is that it lets you in, like going through a door, because the person talks to you. Then, you can introduce the little things to show you care like a surprise takeaway, a magazine or a DVD.
REVEREND CLARA MENSAH
I met an Eastern European lady who was scared of going out, scared of travelling on trains and concerned about self harm. I befriended her and she started to open up about her life circumstances. This relationship kept her off medication and gave her hope. Ten years on, she is happy and life is good. Sometimes we just need to befriend people. We got there because talking helped.
PUNKIN’ PATCH INTERIOR DESIGNER TOKS ARUOTURE
I have started to become more vocal about mental health problems and to encourage people to talk. A mental health problem is an invisible illness for you don’t see somebody with a plaster on their finger, a patch on their eye or cast on their leg. I’ve started the conversation because it makes mental health visible and some of my friends have started to listen.
M.G CUTS BARBER MIKE
Mental health problems are all around us. You never know who may be experiencing one and it affects everyone from feeling low, to stress, anxiety and illnesses that are more severe. It is good to get opinions from people and speaking out loud and tackling something is better than keeping it inside and running the risk of letting things get worse.
www.time-to-change.org.uk
MARCH 21 - 27, 2013 THE VOICE | 27
We talk
“It’s nice to have someone who can read in between the lines when you are talking ”
VOLUNTEER: Louise Goux-Wirth, (Right) whose work mate Emma Brown supported her through depression.
By Yinka Sunmonu
Louise GouxWirth, is Vice President o fCommunity & Welfare at the University of West England Students’ Union. She is a Time to Change volunteer and talks about the importance of removing stigma around mental health.
I
had been coping with depression for a good few years but had not been conscious of what it was. I eventually sought help from a psychotherapist as I started to feel unwell. Last year, I nearly quit my job due to my mental health problem. I was struggling to keep things together and the stress of life became too
much. I just wanted the quickest way out. I asked for help from a friend at work, as I couldn’t last the day without crying and feeling sad. The response was better than I could have imagined and having such caring support at work has made the difference between staying and leaving. I am able to be flexible with my work hours to attend therapy and having a friendly face at work means that I don’t have to put a brave face on to the whole world. Everyone is so supportive actually and they always ask if I’m okay. Little things help make things easier, like texts to see how I am and randomly finding packets of Skittles on my desk to make me smile. It really makes such a difference knowing that you have people who care and, most importantly, someone who understands. It’s nice to have someone who can read in between the lines when you are talking and you don’t have to pretend with them. Talking is the best thing that has happened to me as I didn’t have to quit my job because I was having a bad time. I am able to manage when I have bad times, I can keep the job that I really love and get the help and support I need at the same time. If somebody came to me to say they had depression, I would send them a text message or go and visit – little things to show that I care about them and what they are going through.
I feel happier that I have spoken about my mental health because it can help others in this position and other people can have a greater understanding about the issues. By speaking out, some people may see me and think I may not have pulled my life together but I have. My mental health problem no longer controls my life.
Emma Brown, a biomedical graduate, is a staff member at the UWE Student Union. She is Louise’s friend and colleague.
L
ouise asked for some time and explained things saying that she was experiencing depression and the only outcome she could see was to withdraw from some areas of her life and that work was the obvious choice. My gut reaction was that work wasn’t the problem. I’ve worked here for over five years now and can recognise the cycle of when it will get busy and when it is a bit quieter. We talked. Louise gave some more details about her background, lifestyle
and things that had a massive impact on her attitude and behaviour. Although she was in a vulnerable position, she was very honest in order to move forward. I worked through some practical steps that would make a difference to her in the job. Something that was really poignant at the time, which I still remember, was Louise’s description of how if she didn’t get out of bed for work, she might never get out of bed. Although Louise had a smile on her face, in her head, it was different, so I would try to make sure there were motivators to get her to work in the morning. Really, it’s about making sure that Louise is okay and that we take time to talk. I remember the day that Louise looked at me with horror when I asked, “Are you okay,” she said, “yes” and I said, “don’t lie…” There was shock on her face… she did not expect to be challenged or told, “you’re not okay today, what can we do about that?” You don’t have to be an expert on mental health but I could do little things to help her get through the day. I buy packets of Skittles and leave them on her desk, make time for her, ensure that she is surrounded with things she likes and I remove barriers, for example changing working patterns and making sure that she doesn’t take on too much work.
STAYING IN TOUCH: Jason Shonibare.
Jason Shonibare, works for a leading children’s charity and has a special interest in mental health problems. He has supported friends experiencing a mental illness.
T
he conversation with Sam* started when I noticed that my friend stopped engaging in social activities and going to parties. Sam came up with all sorts of reasons for this and they got more outlandish each time. Eventually, I said “What’s going on?” Sam would not give a reason at the time and so I spoke to some of our friends who were just as worried. It turned out Sam wasn’t happy anymore to the extent of leaving the house to
FACT
avoid the family when they were at home. Once I knew what was going on, I tried to engage with Sam. I made sure that we spoke often and I tapped into the things my friend liked. We’d go for trips, attend the cinema and go for a walk. It can be difficult to start the conversation even though mental health problems are so common in society. Sometimes we might feel insecure about how we deal with the situation and feel that we have no experience to speak about it especially if we haven’t gone through it out ourselves. However, the important thing to remember is that you don’t have to be an expert, just asking someone how they are can make a big difference. * name has been changed If you’re interested in sharing your story in the media, please go to www.time-to-change.org. uk/media-volunteers’
42% of British adults admit they don’t feel they know enough about mental health problems to talk to a friend going through one. Find out how to start your conversation and help someone you know experiencing a mental health problem at www.time-to-change.org.uk or Tweet #timetotalk
www.time-to-change.org.uk
28 | THE VOICE MARCH 21 - 27, 2013
Ex-footballer Leon McKenzie finds his voice
F
ootballer turned singer Leon McKenzie started his footballing career at Crystal Palace, aged 19. He has played for a number of clubs including Fulham, Norwich and Charlton. Born in Croydon, South London, he is the son of former British and European boxing champion Clinton McKenzie. In this edited interview with Hazelann Williams he mentions his experience of depression, how it led to him becoming a mental health advocate and how friends and family can help through challenging times. Success for Leon McKenzie would perhaps be even more gratifying, when one considers some of the experiences of his past. In 2000, he lost his sister after she took her own life at the age of 23, and in 2006, he went through a bitter divorce from his first wife. Having also battled with depression, things came to a head in 2010 when the sportsman tried to take his own life. “The last four years have been horrific,” he says. “Things that have happened in my life… I had to start all over again. I was in shock for a good few years. I wasn’t really myself. It wasn’t until later on in my career that depression caught up with me and knocked me sideways.” “But I got through it because I spoke to a lot of people. I’ve a fantastic family around
me and beautiful kids,” says the 34-year old star. “And of course, music helps. I used to go to the studio after training and record music. In the last year or so, if I didn’t have music I don’t know where I would be today. It fulfilled the role when my football career ended.” Now, the singer has become an advocate for open discussions around mental health problems and helps other footballers who need support to address this.
HELP
“Unfortunately depression is still not taken that seriously, “ he says. “The reason I took it upon myself to speak about the illness when I was ready to, was because after I came out of the situation when I tried to take my life, I didn’t think there was enough support within football or from the FA Football Association. “Since then, I’ve done a few articles and TV appearances and I’ve had three footballers contact me, men I’d never spoken to in my career who told me that my story has inspired them and how they are struggling. They wanted to know how to get help.” Looking forward, the future is bright. McKenzie has written a book, ‘My Fight With Life’, and has embarked on a musical career, something he owes, in part, to his long time friend MC Harvey who found fame with the So Solid Crew.
“The transition to music and timing has really been a blessing and I couldn’t have done it without the team Harvey has joined me with. I have to thank many people, in pushing me forward. I owe Harvey a lot.”
FRIENDS
Harvey, in explaining the history that the two men shared, from their early days in south London to becoming well-known personalities, said, “We’ve been friends since we were kids; we were both footballers before we were musicians. Leon was a guy that all the youngsters looked up to. He signed a professional contract at the age of 17 and was very good. I didn’t know anything about his singing until the beginning of last year. He sent me Finally the first single in November last year and I just knew [it could work].” For someone who has had an accomplished sporting career, McKenzie is humbled that his experience with mental health problems has led him into other directions where he can make a difference to others as well as a chance to produce music and build another dream career. Want to have these tips ready for your conversation? Go to www.time-to-change.org.uk to download your own tips card
FACT 75% of people who have experienced a mental health problem say they have lost friendships as a result of their illness.
POCKET SIZE GUIDE
www.time-to-change.org.uk
MARCH 21 - 27, 2013 THE VOICE | 29
pledge to raise “Church leaders Time to congregate awareness of mental health
”
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We’re not talking about mental health problems in the community and we need to. This is the overwhelming conclusion from the Healing Starts With Talking roundtable. The discussion, with representations from church leaders including Reverend Nezlin Sterling, Bishop Danny Bennett and award winning dementia nurse and Pastor Morejoy Saineti, focused on user-friendly approaches to educate people and start to break down the stigma associated with it.
“The difficulty is that we are not clear what mental illness is”, says Pastor Mary Grace Masarakufa of Power Arena, “and so it is ignored, myths are embraced and there is fear and that’s before you get to the stigma associated with it.” Discussing mental health in the community is complex. Historically, many African Caribbean people are not comfortable talking about their mental health, some see it as a sign of weakness, others are worried about how they will be treated, especially as they will carry the double yoke of being black and having a mental illness. Attendees admitted there were church leaders who did not know
enough about mental health problems and more knowledge would be very beneficial to help remove the stigma around this illness. “Churches need to be among the agents to facilitate change”, said Seyi Eyitayo, “We don’t want members to think we’ve let them down.” A key outcome from the roundtable is the 10 point plan was devised which includes the formation of a working party to develop initiatives to engage people and raise awareness. To find out more about mental health problems, check out: www.time-to-change.org.uk/ what-are-mental-health problems
ROUNDTABLE DISCUSSION: Attendees at the Time to Talk roundtable discussion held recently at the Hilton, South Quay
Creative ways to start a conversation Roundtable inspires ways to start a dialogue around mental health through cooking, music, books and sending e-cards COOK
If you know someone experiencing a mental health problem and don’t know how to broach the conversation why not use something like cooking to provide a relaxing, interactive atmosphere. Test it with this Jamaican Stew recipe Jamaican Stew Vegan, wheat and gluten free Serves 2-3 people Ingredients 2 tbs olive oil 1 onion (chopped) 3 long green chillies (sliced finely) 1 red bell pepper (sliced lengthways) 1 green bell pepper (sliced lengthways) 2 sticks celery (chopped) ½ tsp salt ½ teaspoon ground pepper 1 teaspoon turmeric 750ml hot water 600g sweet potatoes (peeled and chopped into 2in cubes, approx) 400g mixed beans (red or white kidney beans, borlotti beans, black-eyed beans or chick peas – or use two small cans) 75g coconut powder Chopped dill or fresh coriander to serve. Method Using a wok or frying pan, heat the oil. Add the onion, green chillies, bell peppers, celery, salt and pepper and the turmeric. Add hot water. Stir gently, cover and cook for around five minutes on a me-
dium heat. Add the sweet potatoes and cook until slightly soft. Mix the coconut powder with a tablespoon of hot water and add to the rest of the ingredients. Finally, add the precooked beans. Stir gently and heat through. To serve Serve stew over the top of rice or with couscous and a green salad and garnish with a sprinkling of chopped dill or coriander on top. (Recipe adapted with permission from the award winning Riverside Vegetaria, Kingston, Surrey).
MUSIC
Music is the heartbeat of the community and many of us can connect with songs. Little Things, by India Arie, about the pleasure of simple things and the joy they bring like “a call in the morning from my little sister”, sums up how to start your conversation. It’s about the small but meaningful things. By contrast, Friends, by Shalamar is the ultimate friendship song and highlights their importance. We asked Voice readers for their thoughts on inspirational songs: @SkratcHouse Take Me To The King, “great song that inspired me lately” @akuadesigns21 Everything Na double double, “it brings a smile 2 my face every time”: @RosemryChileshe
The Lord Is My Light, “it instantly lifts me up & re-assures me.” @lisettemibo Wonder by Emeli Sandé, “positive and uplifting lyrics” @AmedeeLifestyle Trench Town Rock, ‘one thing about music when it hits, you feel no pain’ “love that line” @ivymunro The Rose That Grew from Concrete – 2 Pac @mslaurens Optimistic, Sounds of Blackness @adebayojones “I love Israel Hougton’s It’s Not Over, it has a message that uplifts d soul” @missiecindz
Tutti Frutti, Little Richard @nurseandmeduk Lifted, by Lighthouse Family @yemikosibah Reach Out And Touch Somebody’s Hand by Diana Ross “Many Rivers to Cross by Jimmy Cliff because it’s reflective of a person’s situation and you have to preserve and carry on”, Anthony Nwosa “Azonto. We start an Azonto session and really dance because it has rhythm and a fun element to it”, says Tuka Brown.
BOOKS
Be inspired with these reader choices: @HouseofArike The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, “Always a great read” @nriches Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren @janetlifecoach Keep on Pushing by Devon Harris, Do You, by Russell Simmons, “inspirational books” @loveiarasanyang “Start with The Prophet [Kahlil Gibran].”
SAY IT WITH AN E-CARD
Ask how you doin? Artist Tonderai has designed an exclusive series of e-cards to let people with a mental health problem know you ‘re thinking about them. Time to Change research shows that only one in four people with a mental health problem receive a ‘Get well soon’ card even though 80 per cent of
them say that a card would be a good way for others to let them know they are thinking about them. E-cards available soon at time-to-change.org.uk