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Marjorie Knuuti and Mother Theresa
The Red Barn's Laura Benedict
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PUBLISHER
David. S. Nealley
EDITOR IN CHIEF
Ellen L. Spooner
CREATIVE DIRECTOR
Ian J. Marquis
EDITORS
Catherine N. Zub Lois N. Nealley Mark D. Roth Clyde Tarr
CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS
Ian J. Marquis Victor Oboyski
SALES & DISTRIBUTION
Christine Parker George Holton Amber Small Jim Gorham A. Peter Legendre Roseanne Bolduc Dale Overlock Fred Connell Deborah Batting Victor Oboyski
WRITERS
Paulette Oboyski Cathy Lickteig Makofski Dr. Len Kaye Barbara Kent Lawrence Jane Margesson LC Van Savage Fia Marquis Hunter Howe Mark Roth Ellen Spooner
David with his fiancée. Bridget O'Donnell
In this great Holiday Issue of Maine Seniors Magazine we speak to two very important themes: caring and giving.
E
njoy reading about Laura Benedict and how she has created a strong business model around helping others and fund raising with her Red Barn restaurant in Augusta. Also, read about Marjorie Knuuti, a lady from Searsport, Maine who traveled overseas and made it her mission to work along with Mother Teresa to help those in need. Our very own Barbara Kent Lawrence reflects on her days as a social worker in the Bronx. Her touching story not only proves how small acts of kindness can make a big difference as she also reminds us of how grateful we should be for what we do have in our own lives.
SOCIAL MEDIA
The Holiday season is also a time of reflection.
BUSINESS OFFICE
Many of us feel both fortunate and some sense of loss as we look back over the course of our lives and even over the past year.
Maine Seniors Magazine is published in the State of Maine by Maine Seniors Magazine, L.L.C. in association with Maine Media Consulting, L.L.C. All information herein represents the views of individual writers and their understanding of the issues at hand, and may not represent the views of the Maine Seniors Magazine, its management, or editorial staff. For more information about Maine Seniors Magazine, visit www.meseniors.com.
Len Kaye in Sage Lens reflects on his childhood home which is also covered in one of my all time favorite From the Porch stories by Hunter Howe in “Home for Christmas”.
Shane Wilson
87 Hillside Avenue, Bangor, Maine 04401 Phone: (207) 299-5358
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1 • MAINE SENIORS
Plus, for those of us who are missing loved ones this time of year be mindful of what Waldo Clark shares with us in “Someone’s Watching Over You”. A very Merry Christmas and best wishes for Happy Holidays from all of us at MAINE SENIORS Magazine to all of you. —David S. Nealley, Publisher
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MAINE SENIORS • Contributors
Happy Holidays From all of us at Maine Seniors Magazine!
Donna Halvorsen
Chloe JonPaul
Barbara Kent Lawrence
Ellen L. Spooner
Kitty Wheeler
Ian J. Marquis
Catherine Nealley Zub and Lois N. Nealley
Avery Hunt
3 • MAINE SENIORS
Brad Eden
Russ Van Arsdale
Hunter Howe
Mark D. Roth
LC Van Savage
Paulette Oboyski
Michael LaRiccia
Cathy Lickteig Makofski
Lyric and Fia Marquis
Jane Margesson
Dr. Lenard W. Kaye
Wanda Curtis
Sheila Grant
Clyde Tarr
Cliff Gallant
Rev. Dr. Cathy Genthner
Victor Oboyski
DECEMBER 2016 • 4
Page 17
DECEMBER 2016 ISSUE 1 Publisher's Note
BY DAVID S. NEALLEY
3 Contributors 7 Prime Mover: Laura Benedict
BY PAULETTE OBOYSKI
17 Prime Mover: Marjorie Knuuti
BY CATHY LICKTEIG MAKOFSKI
25 Sage Lens: In Search of My Childhood Home
Page 7
BY DR. LEN KAYE
29 Special: Miss Jones: Two Presents
BY BARBARA KENT LAWRENCE
31 Health Treasures: Joint Replacement
GUEST ARTICLE
35 Special: Christmas: A Season of Joy and
Giving • BY ELLEN L. SPOONER
37 Special: Chanukah, 2017
Page 39
BY MARK D. ROTH
39 The MAINE Point: A Lifetime of Kindness to
Others • BY JANE MARGESSON
41 Legacy: Enabling Student Volunteers
GUEST ARTICLE
43 Just Pondering: Someone is Watching
Over You • BY WALDO CLARK
45 Legacy Too: Changing Seasons, Changing
Investment Landscape • GUEST ARTICLE
51 A Trail Less Traveled: Keeping Our
Woodland Creatures Wild • BY BRAD EDEN
Page 57
53 Bridging Generations: Not So Social Media
BY JOAN CLARK
55 Special: It Was The Only Thing I Wanted
BY LC VAN SAVAGE
57 Food for Thought: In Praise of the Timeless
Chocolate Cookie • BY FIA MARQUIS
61 From the Porch: Home for Christmas
BY HUNTER HOWE Page 61 DECEMBER 2016 • 6
PRIME MOVER • Laura Benedict
Laura with her brother, Peter
LauraBenedict BY PAULETTE OBOYSKI •
L
PHOTOS BY VICTOR OBOYSKI AND COURTESY OF LAURA BENEDICT
aura Benedict has a unique way of running her Red Barn restaurant in Augusta, Maine. She assigns top priority to senior citizens, veterans and the handicapped, she and her staff help fundraise for every worthy cause in their Maine community that needs a venue and, she gives abundant portions of her seafood stew, lobster rolls and whoopie pies away as gifts.
7 • MAINE SENIORS
Victor Oboyski and courte
Red Barn Evolution
In July 1977, Laura’s brother Robert Benedict established their Red Barn family restaurant in Augusta, Maine. Laura has worked there since she was 11 years old, along with her other nine siblings. Through the years, her sister Susie and then her brother Jimmy took turns at ownership. Laura became the sole owner in 1986, when she was 19 years old.
Laura Benedict • PRIME MOVER
Happy Holidays
Presently, Laura has 38 employees. Her two brothers, Robert and Peter, a niece, two nephews, and two grand nephews work with Laura. The restaurant has a capacity of 500 people—which includes 41 outdoor handicap accessible picnic tables. In the summertime they serve around 2,000 good, affordably priced meals per day. Top seating priority is given to people 80 years old and up. There are three times more handicap parking spaces than usual, and three reserved Purple Heart Veteran parking spaces. They can cater to busloads of people—and they do.
Laura was born in Augusta, Maine on July 16, 1965, the 9th of esy of Laura 10 children. She graduated from Cony High School in 1983 and Benedict attended Thomas College for business. Her father, Willis (Bill) Benedict and mother, Florence (Nilsen) Benedict were born in Brooklyn, New York. After a few years of living in other states, they settled with their family in Augusta. Eventually, her parents bought Augusta Seafood. Laura relates,“Our parents instilled in each and every one of us that the secret to life is hard work. It doesn’t matter if it is with your brain or with your back. You get up, no excuses, and get to work and figure life out.”
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PRIME MOVER • Laura Benedict
Laura Benedict and Santa
Childhood photo of Peter, Ronnie and Laura Benedict
“Our parents instilled in each and every one of us that the secret to life is hard work. It doesn’t matter if it is with your brain or with your back.
You get up, no excuses, and get to work and figure life out.”
9 • MAINE SENIORS
Laura states, “On a Friday in November of 2009, my business was failing, I could not pay my bills, and I was ready to give it up. Luckily, my deliveryman could not read the English, “Cash on Delivery” slip, so he delivered a truckload of food to my restaurant. I decided to advertise that on Monday, we would be serving ‘free food for donation only’ to the first worthy cause that arrived at our door.” On Monday, St. Michael’s of Augusta 6th grade class was the first to arrive. They were raising funds for a trip to Boston. People were lined up outside the door and the St. Michael’s kids helped Laura work the dining room. Laura recalled, “We raised quite a bit of money and all the donations went to St. Michael’s. The kids were thrilled. Since that time, I decided to use my restaurant as a venue to help raise money for time sensitive issues. My staff and I have helped raise over $2 million for charities and my business has exponentially grown to the size that it is today.” Prospering Family Business
Dana Wren is a representative of Dennis Paper & Food Service, located in Hampden, Maine. He has known Laura for almost 7
Laura Benedict • PRIME MOVER
years. His company provides the Red Barn with about 90% of its restaurant supplies. He shares, “I have seen Laura rise from personal and financial struggles. When Laura first started to do these benefits and give things away, many thought she was crazy. But soon after, people started realizing that she was doing this because she is a kind-hearted person. As a result, more and more people returned to her restaurant because they would rather spend their money at Laura’s Red Barn, a small family business that supports good causes. Now she is thriving and making great business decisions. It is amazing that when you start thinking about other people instead of yourself, how much better your life and your business actually becomes.” Peter Benedict is Laura’s older brother. He has worked at the Red Barn under Laura’s ownership for 12 years and is the restaurant manager. He says, “Laura is always prepared and looking ahead— whether we have 100 people or 1,000. Even though our location may be off the beaten path on Riverside Drive, in the height of the summer season it is not uncommon for us to feed a couple of thousand people a day, including the take-out counter where we have three phone lines that are usually busy. If there is a problem or a complaint of any kind, Laura addresses it immediately.”
Peter continued,“Years ago, our father sold our family home on the lake in order to purchase the Augusta Seafood business. That was devastating to us kids. We loved that place. The lake was spring fed, there were loons on the water and we knew all the fishing spots and trails. Thirty years later, due to the success of her Red Barn restaurant, Laura bought a large camp directly across from our family home and I bought a cabin right beside it.” Red Barn Walkers Across America
Laura’s best friend since they were seniors in high school is Christina Benedict. Christina is also Laura’s sister-in-law, since she is married to Laura’s brother, Peter. Christina relates, “Laura and her siblings have come from humble beginnings. She has turned every hurdle into a stepping-stone and in doing so, she creates a ripple effect for everyone around her. She is a force for positive change and the depth of her outreach is extraordinary.” Christina continued, “For example, there was an upcoming event last February at the Red Barn where Laura had invited families with loved ones on the Autism spectrum to dine for free. Before this event, Laura and I discussed that the scraping of the noisy chairs needed tennis balls to alleviate the sound for people bothered by
Exterior of the Red Barn restaurant
DECEMBER 2016 • 1 0
PRIME MOVER • Laura Benedict
Laura at a fundraiser for Cassidy Charette's honor
too much sensory stimulation. This prompted Laura to purchase cases upon cases of Red Barn tennis balls for the dining room chairs and also anyone with walkers. She now gives Red Barn tennis balls to those with walkers at all the area Nursing Homes and to people with walkers who come to the Red Barn.” Laura has started what she calls,“Red Barn Walkers Across America”. She has given away over 7,600 tennis balls and offers free meals to anyone who comes to her restaurant with Red Barn tennis balls on their walkers. Maine Veterans
Laura’s most successful fundraiser is Honor Flight Maine. When she held a fundraiser for them this summer, it was featured on NBC Nightly News with Lester Holt. Honor Flight Maine is an organization that honors Maine veterans by flying them to see their memorials in Washington, D.C.—all expenses are paid by the organization. Laurie Sidelinger, Chair of Honor Flight Maine, states,“Laura has demonstrated her commitment to Honor Flight Maine by providing her wonderful venue for our very successful
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Laura Benedict • PRIME MOVER
“Laura has demonstrated her
commitment to Honor Flight Maine
by providing her wonderful venue for our very successful fundraiser at her Red Barn restaurant. She has also exhibited the passion that we all share in our commitment to showing love and honor to our veterans.” fundraiser at her Red Barn restaurant. She has also exhibited the passion that we all share in our commitment to showing love and honor to our veterans.” So far, Laura has raised over $20,000 for Honor Flight Maine.
The Benedict family
Activities Director of the Residential Care Unit at the Maine Veterans’ Home in Augusta, Mona Boucher, declares, “Our Veterans’ Home has about 150 residents. Laura comes to visit at least once a week and brings gifts for them. This past summer, she invited our residents and staff to come to eat at her restaurant for free. We brought 12 residents and she treated us all with an enormous amount of respect. This is her way of paying back those that have served our country in the Armed Forces. Quite often she leaves special gift bags of food from her restaurant with the names of our residents at the Veterans’ Home.” Richard Patterson, an Air Force Veteran (1960 to 1962), has known Laura and her family for over 45 years. He is a resident of the Maine Veterans’ Home. Laura comes to visit him every week. Patterson relates, “When she visits, she never comes emptyhanded. She usually finds out how many residents and staff would like some of her food and she brings us lobster rolls, seafood stew and whoopie pies—free for anyone who would like them. She finds out from me who has returned from a hospital visit or who has a birthday and she brings special food for them. She gives us Red Barn hoodies and Red Barn tennis balls for our walkers. She not only brings food to us, she also delivers food to the home bound in our area.” Patterson recalled that when he was a young boy, Laura’s parents, who were owners of Augusta Seafood, were also very generous with their seafood to those in need.
Laura and Connor Sawtelle Richard Patterson and Mona Boucher at the Veteran's Home in Augusta
DECEMBER 2016 • 1 2
PRIME MOVER • Laura Benedict
Examples of Laura’s Giving
Laura Benedict is a champion for people of all ages. Three-year-old Connor Sawtelle is one of her favorite youngsters. Since he was an infant, he has been bravely battling with some serious illnesses. He has been diagnosed with a rare neurological condition of the brain and spine called Chiari malformation. Laura has held a couple of fundraisers for him and at one point, assisted the family with plane tickets and hotel costs when they needed to go with Connor for emergency surgery in New York City. His mother, Erika Sawtelle, praised Laura for all the help that she has given to Connor and his family:“Laura’s positivity and her pay-it-forward attitude just rubs off on everybody around her and they just want to help. If it wasn’t for Laura, her staff and our community, Connor could not have gotten the help that he needed.”
Wounded veterans get special parking at the Red Barn Dana Wren, Laura B. and Dana's wife, Angel
Cassidy Charette was a gifted 17-year-old honor student and athlete at Messalonskee High School in Oakland, Maine who tragically died during a hayride accident on Saturday, October 11, 2014. She and her schoolmates had planned a Project Graduation
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PRIME MOVER • Laura Benedict
“Laura is first in line, not only with monetary support, but she extends her love, letting you know you are
never alone. She sometimes even comes with her famous Red Barn
seafood stew and lobster rolls."
fundraiser at the Red Barn for that following Monday, on Columbus Day. With the permission of her family, the event went as planned. But as Cassidy’s mother, Monica Charette, said, "The event instead became a safe haven for students and families in the community to grieve together and mourn the loss of Cassidy." Since then, she said Laura has continued to support their family at events, services and programs that honor her daughter, including fundraisers for
the ShineOnCass Scholarship at Messalonskee High School and youth mentoring programs established in Cassidy's name at Big Brothers Big Sisters of Mid-Maine. Monica Charette states, “Laura is first in line, not only with monetary support, but she extends her love, letting you know you are never alone. She sometimes even comes with her famous Red Barn seafood stew and lobster rolls and offers to volunteer. We are grateful for all she gives, and all she has taught our community. Laura is a champion for social responsibility. She and Cassidy are proof that one person can make a difference in this world.” Stacy Savage’s son, Ryan Wayne Mullens’ favorite place to eat was the Red Barn. On June 23, 2014, at the age of 16 years old, Ryan died in an ATV crash. In his memory, Stacy Savage has started Ryan’s Way, Inc.—a non-profit that donates money, time and experiences for good causes. When she shared her son’s story with Laura, Savage relates, “Laura, through her actions, showed how passionate she was for our cause. Laura held a benefit for
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Laura Benedict • PRIME MOVER
Our residents LOVE living here . . . We’re confident YOU will too.
Laura and the Red Barn staff
Ryan’s Way on August 23, 2016 in which she donated her food, labor and her facility, which helped us raise funding for our mission. What she did has enabled me to do more for other people. Laura’s generosity and philosophy are powerful. She has taught me a great deal.” Laura and her Red Barn Love Senior Citizens
Recently, the New York Post had a story titled, “NYC’s Busiest Restaurants Hate Old People” (August 13, 2016). It is refreshing to know that the Red Barn Restaurant, in the heart of Maine, loves Senior Citizens, Veterans and everyone who visits. Whatever age and walk of life— they are welcomed and celebrated. Laura Benedict, her family and staff will greet you with a smile and a delicious, hearty Maine meal and you may just wind up helping out someone in the community who needs a little support. MSM
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PRIME MOVER • Marjorie Knuuti
Mother Theresa
Marjorie KNUUTI BY CATHY LICKTEIG MAKOFSKI PHOTOGRAPHY BY ROBIN GUIST
A photo of Mother Teresa, a wisp of a woman in a white sari with blue trim, wearing a dark blue sweater, holding the 1979 Nobel Peace prize, was awe-inspiring to Marjorie (Marge) Knuuti, now 78, of Searsport, Maine. "Just looking at her and thinking about what this quiet unassuming woman had accomplished convinced me that one day I would go to India and work with her,” said Marge. But it would be more than a decade before Marge, equally quiet and unassuming, would get to Calcutta.
17 • MAINE SENIORS
M
arge grew up in Newton, Massachusetts, where she earned her nursing degree. Over the years, she and her family lived in Newfoundland, Vermont, and Massachusetts, settling in Searsport, Maine in 1970. Marge worked as the nurse in the Searsport School District. “It was important to me to be there for the students, especially those who were medically fragile." During the summers, Marge worked at Eastern Maine Medical Center in Bangor. She was also the nurse at Penobscot Shores Retirement Community in Belfast, Maine and, while there, took a leave of absence to volunteer with Partners in Health in Nicaragua.
Marjorie Knuuti • PRIME MOVER
In 1988 Marge wrote to the
Missionaries of Charity in Calcutta, expressing interest in volunteering, but didn't get a response for many months. India's mail system was so poor, volunteers had to carry
letters back to their home countries for mailing.
During this time, Marge was also learning about Mother Teresa. In 1928, at age 18, Agnes Bojaxhiu had left her home in Skopje, Macedonia, and entered the Sisters of Loreto Abbey in Rathfarnham, Ireland to learn English and become a missionary. In 1931 she took her first religious vows, chose the name Teresa, and began teaching at the convent school in Calcutta. Teresa loved teaching but found the crushing poverty and misery that gripped
Calcutta almost unbearable. In 1946, while traveling on a train to a retreat, Teresa heard a call from God: “I was told to leave my convent in Ireland and help the poor while living among them." Teresa exchanged her Loreto habit for a plain white cotton sari with a blue border, became an Indian citizen and studied basic medical care. By 1948, she was caring for the destitute and dying in the slums of Calcutta. The Indian government helped by giving Mother Teresa several old abandoned buildings to use for her work. Then, she and a group of young women started the Missionaries of Charity, “To care for the hungry, naked, homeless, crippled, blind, lepers, all those people who feel unwanted, unloved, uncared for, those who have become a burden to society and are shunned by everyone." Today, more than 4500 nuns and over a million lay people in 133 countries are part of the Missionaries of Charity. Calcutta, the city of more than 4.5 million, is the center of their work. In 1988 Marge wrote to the Missionaries expressing interest in volunteering, but didn't get a response for many months. She would learn that India's mail system was so poor that the volunteers had
DECEMBER 2016 • 1 8
PRIME MOVER • Marjorie Knuuti
The YWCA that Marjorie lived in while helping the needy.
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Mother Teresa with Volunteers
to carry letters back to their home countries for mailing. The reply Marge had been waiting for had been postmarked, Kansas City, Missouri. In that letter, Marge was offered several places at which to volunteer; she selected Calcutta. Her job would be to teach basic nursing to Mother Teresa's novitiates and to provide patient care. This would be Marge's 50th birthday present to herself. In September, 1989, Marge took a month's leave of absence from her job at school and flew to India, where she had never been. Marge had been told to go to the Missionaries of Charity Mother House when she arrived in Calcutta.“After we landed, I got my few bags, bought a map, located the Mother House, and hired a taxi to take me there." She met Sister Pricilla who assigned housing and work duties to the nearly 200 volunteers who were there at the time. Marge was assigned to stay at a modest Y with the others, many of whom were young college students from all over the world.
Caring for the wounded
19 • MAINE SENIORS
Prem Dam, the Home for Mentally Challenged People, was Marge's first work assignment. Patients were homeless or had been brought there because they were near death. "I bathed people,
Marjorie Knuuti • PRIME MOVER
In September, 1989, Marge took a month's leave of absence from her job at school and flew to India, where she had never been, to volunteer. This would be her 50th
birthday present to herself.
washed their clothes and bedding in buckets, scrubbed walls, floors and dishes,” said Marge. Volunteers like Marge worked all day, six days a week, and never knew when they would get a new assignment or why. "We did what we were asked and went where they needed us," said Marge. One day, Marge asked about Mother Teresa and learned she was hospitalized with malaria and heart problems; she would remain there for several weeks.
Marge's next assignment was the Home for the Dying, now called the Home of the Pure Heart. This hospice had about 120 beds on two levels. Patients lay on thin mattresses, their beds close together. Above each bed was a number that was recorded in the patient registry book along with an identifying factor such as a broken leg or sore on left side. If someone came looking for a family member, this often helped with identification. "It was all quite sad, but there was so much to do that we didn't have time to dwell on it," said Marge. “We bathed the patients, washed their clothes, prepared their food, fed those who could eat and helped make their last days as comfortable as possible." The volunteers carried out Mother Teresa's conviction that these patients die with dignity.“A beautiful death," she said, "is for people who lived like animals to die like angels—loved and wanted." At the end of September 1989, Marge's month-long experience with the Missionaries of Charity came to an end. Mother Teresa was still recovering and Marge had not been able to meet her.“Even so, there was no doubt in my mind that I would come back."
DECEMBER 2016 • 2 0
PRIME MOVER • Marjorie Knuuti Home for the Mentally Challenged
sat up thinking that this was too much and she would return to the United States. "But when the sun came up, things didn't look so bad." Marge moved to another room at the Y, bought new sheets and mattress cover, and began her second tour as a volunteer for the Missionaries of Charity. Each morning at 5:30, Marge walked nearly two miles from the Y to the chapel at the Mother House for mass. The novitiates and missionaries would enter singing St. Anthony's Prayer, Make Me an Instrument of Your Peace. "It was beautiful and unforgettable," said Marge. (Various artists can be heard singing this on You Tube.) She also noticed that Mother Teresa was in attendance at mass.
Each morning at 5:30, Marge walked nearly two miles from the Y to the chapel at the Mother House for mass. She also noticed that Mother Teresa was in attendance at mass.
Marge was assigned to The Home for the Dying, where every morning she would teach the novitiates basic nursing care, including wound treatment, management of diarrhea and comfort care. When she wasn't teaching, Marge cared for patients, most of whom were found on the streets. Some had been badly burned because they were so weak they'd fallen in their tiny fire pits trying
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In 1992, she returned to Calcutta for July and August. "Calcutta is huge, dirty, vibrant, and every day it wakes up wild," said Marge. "Daybreak is almost instantaneous because it is so close to the equator— there's no dawn or dusk. Animals, street people and beggars are out most of the time." Marge carried bananas to give to the hungry. "Though there were few westerners, I never felt threatened," she said. Marge stayed at the same Y, which had deteriorated badly in the three years since she had been there, and was infested with rats and bed bugs. "I looked out my window and saw people sleeping on the streets," said Marge, "and decided that I could take the vermin." She bought a kerosene-based cleaning product and washed everything in her room, including the mattress, and opened the windows expecting the odor to disappear; it didn't. Marge awoke that night with a horrible headache and breathing problems. She
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Marjorie Knuuti • PRIME MOVER
to cook something to eat or to keep warm. Marge and the novitiates treated the burns as best they could, but often there was a shortage of SilverDYNE, the compound they used for treatment. One day, Marge noticed they were running very low on SilverDYNE and asked Sister Luke, who was supervising, what would happen if they ran out. "The Lord will provide," she replied. "Not long after that," said Marge, "a Belgian physician visiting Mother Teresa arrived with a huge suitcase full of SilverDYNE.” He had not known how desperate they were.
Mother Theresa with the Pope, exchanging a greeting
Marge often had to give her patients injections of antibiotics. "This was very painful for them because they were so thin and there was no tissue or fat between the skin and bone." Also, because there was a shortage of needles, Marge and the others had to sharpen, clean, boil and sterilize the needles so they could be reused.
Marge worked six days a week. On Thursdays, she and the volunteers and novitiates gathered at the Mother House to meet with Mother Teresa. "The first time we met I literally ran into her, and remember thinking she's even smaller than I had expected. I got shaky in her presence." The Thursday conversations would go on for an hour or more, and Marge remembers that Mother Teresa, then in her 80's, was sharp and encouraged questions. Marge asked how to handle the magnitude of need here and everywhere. Mother Teresa replied: "You don't have to be in Calcutta to help the poor and dying. Whatever you're doing here, do the same at home. The worst illness and the worst poverty is the absence of love."
Letter from Mother Teresa to Marjorie
At the end of August 1992, her two-month assignment nearly over, Marge began to feel pangs of sadness. She was eager to see her family and get back to work, but it wasn't easy to leave Calcutta because of the profound impact this experience had on her. "Everything I learned from Mother Teresa
DECEMBER 2016 • 2 2
PRIME MOVER • Marjorie Knuuti
Marjorie holding her pillow, with a quote from Mother Teresa
23 • MAINE SENIORS
Marjorie Knuuti • PRIME MOVER
about simplicity and love and eschewing possessions", said Marge, "is as relevant today as it was 24 years ago when I was working with her and Missionaries of Charity." Still, Marge kept one foot in the modern world when she returned to Maine. She didn't give up her car because she lives in a rural area, or her washing machine because washing clothes in buckets like she did in Calcutta was very hard work. "I have fewer electronic devices now than I had before" said Marge, "and every day I try to commit to living in the present moment." Her last day ended quietly, as would seem appropriate for an experience of this nature. Marge hadn't formed personal attachments—discouraged by the Missionaries—so there weren't any tearful goodbyes. " I did go to the kitchen at the Y to thank the man who prepared my eggs and toast every day for two months. The kitchen is the only home he has." Marge gave away most of the clothes she had and the remaining peanut butter she had brought from home fearing there wouldn't be much she would eat. That was the case, but Marge was careful
and never got sick. When she was ready to go, Marge called a cab, put her suitcase in the back and went to the airport, on her own, just as she had done when she arrived. Marge didn't look back, she knew she would have hours and hours of flying time to think and recall. When asked for key memories from this experience Marge said that there are three. One, being in the presence of Mother Teresa. Two, working beside the Missionaries of Charity who care for the poor, the sick and dying day after day. "They always seemed joyful that they had the privilege of doing this very hard work." Three, the nightly power outages in Calcutta when she would lie on her bed and think. "It was during this darkness-imposed meditation that I began to understand what Mother Theresa meant when she said: 'We can do no great things; only small things with great love,' '' said Marge. MSM
DECEMBER 2016 • 2 4
In Search of My Childhood Home:
50 YEARS LATER BY DR. LEN KAYE The holidays tend to be traditional times for expressing healthy doses of nostalgia. To that end, I have a feel good, if not sentimental, personal story, to tell.
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llow me to share my recent and thoroughly enjoyable experience returning to my birthplace where I spent the first 15 years of life. I was born in Lynchburg, Virginia, and I recently returned for the first time in more than 50 years.
I am generally not the type of person who has an overly wistful affection for the past, but in recent years, I have had a growing urge to visit my childhood home. Dyan, my wife, encouraged me to do it, and she, too, expressed strong interest in seeing where I spent my formative years. And so we hopped a direct flight from Bangor to Washington, D.C., picked up our rental car, and set out on what should have been perhaps a three-hour drive from Reagan International only to arrive in the central Virginian city of Lynchburg six hours later. I’m thinking we were subject to what was perhaps the most horrendous traffic jam of our lives and it certainly served to remind me of two of the many reasons I have grown to love Maine (namely our uncongested roadways and unusually respectful motorists). Not so much for suburban Washington, D.C. Luckily everything just got better and better from then on. To say Lynchburg has dramatically changed over the years is an understatement. It has probably more than doubled in size and has 25 • MAINE SENIORS
sprouted innumerable new communities of stylish condominiums, shopping malls, and enormous McMansions. The good news is that we surprisingly had no trouble finding a good decaf latte with almond milk and a shot of vanilla. The bad news is that there was not a good bagel to be found and certainly not one with smoked salmon and cream cheese on it. But I digress. The next morning, we were able to track down with little difficulty the two homes I lived in and the high school I went to during my freshman year before my family packed and headed for Riverdale in the Bronx. We also visited the hospital where I was born and the country club where I first learned to play the game of tennis. And, I wasn’t about to miss visiting the synagogue I went to and celebrated my Bar Mitzvah, a ceremonial coming of age for Jewish boys on their 13th birthday. In hopes of seeing the inside of the last home in which I lived, I even worked up the nerve to ring the doorbell to
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To say Lynchburg has dramatically changed over the years is an understatement. It has probably more than doubled in size.
ask the current owners if I might take a look around. My sister had done that when she returned to Lynchburg two years or so earlier. Unfortunately, no one was home. Nor did anyone answer the door at the house of my childhood best friend. No trip back to Lynchburg would have been complete for me without driving a bit further west to the Blue Ridge Parkway, a national road along the Blue Ridge, a major mountain chain that is part of the Appalachian Mountains. I have fond memories of my parents taking me on road trips along the Parkway during my childhood. Another must stop was at the Peaks of Otter, three
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mountain peaks which have been a popular scenic spot on the Blue Ridge Parkway since the days of Thomas Jefferson. Dyan and I even toured the campus of Liberty University in Lynchburg, which didn’t even exist when I lived there but is now recognized to be the world’s largest Christian university and no doubt a significant driving force in the revitalization of the city over the years. So now let me pose the obvious question. What could have drawn me back to my birthplace so many years after I had left? Why hadn’t I returned sooner? I’m thinking it was an urge, a sentimental drive that gained steam as I grew older. Call it a nagging even simmering need to return to my roots to relive past experiences if only temporarily. All I know is that every time we drove past a familiar building or street, a big smile appeared on my face and a very comforting sense of satisfaction arose in me. It felt good, very good. Even though I had been gone for all those years, I experienced a powerful sense of familiarity, even comradery, with both the places that had withstood the test of time and the residents now calling Lynchburg their home. The research tells me I’m not alone. Evidence continues to grow confirming the value of reminiscence, of engaging in varying forms of life review. Understanding and appreciating the significance of our life experiences can enhance life satisfaction and our personal sense of well-being. I guess I took reminiscence one step further by actually returning, if only momentarily, to my former life. Was I searching for something – a better time or a safer world? Was I looking to recreate the past or buy back what I had as a child like Walt Disney presumably did in creating his first theme park to feel like his childhood home? Or was I simply curious? I don’t know and I’m not sure it matters. I do think the visit fed my soul and will comfort me into the future. And so, as we left Lynchburg’s city limits heading for our next Virginia adventure, I felt my retreat into nostalgia had been successful – I was satiated and at peace. And, I really felt good that I had been able to share my symbolic “reunion” in my childhood home and the many accompanying feelings and emotions with someone by my side. MSM
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SPECIAL
MISS JONES:
Two Presents BY BARBARA KENT LAWRENCE In 1965, I was a newly minted college graduate working for the Department of Social Services in the South Bronx.
I
had about eighty families on my caseload, including Miss Jones. Miss Jones lived in a small and worn-down apartment with her three children and I thought she was very old. Probably 45 or so, maybe even fifty. Her face looked like pudding, worn and sagging. She moved slowly and with difficulty. I never read case files before I met my clients because I wanted to see them with fresh eyes, and I was astounded to discover that she was my age and saddened to learn she had lived with men who beat her. She suffered, not surprisingly, from depression.
At Christmas, I was going home to Washington, DC to spend a week with my family. I knew we would have a huge tree with piles 29 • MAINE SENIORS
of presents shining below it, sumptuous meals, and as they say,“all the comforts of home”. I looked forward to it, but guilt nagged at me, and I worried about leaving my clients for a week. I decided to write each of them a Christmas card, and mailed the cards shortly before I left New York. Christmas at home was as joyful and satisfying as I had anticipated, and when I flew back to New York I was a few pounds heavier and laden with presents. Moments after I settled behind my desk at the Mott Haven Welfare Center, the phone rang.“This is Miz Jones. I got your card.” She was crying, her words slurred by tears and convulsive sobs.“I never got a card before. I never got a present. You sent me a card. Thank you.” I started crying myself as I began to sense the depth of her loneliness. That she had never even received a card let alone a present, ever in her life, hinted at a level of deprivation I had not imagined. “I painted my apartment for you. Will you come see it?”
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“Yes,” I replied instantly. When she opened the door to her apartment, I saw that what had been a dirty beige was now pink. Walls, ceilings, and radiator covers all pink: garish, glowing, bubblegum pink. Miss Jones smiled. It was the first time I had ever seen her smile.“I got the paint on sale,” she said proudly.
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“It’s wonderful! You did this all yourself?” “Yes, I did it for you. To thank you.” “This is the best present,” I told her, and it was. I wish I could tell you that painting her apartment also changed her life. That she got off welfare, that her kids never got in trouble, that no man ever beat her again, and that she lived happily ever after, but I can’t. I never saw her again because she moved a few months later, but she gave me a gift I have never forgotten. MSM
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Thinking about joint replacement? You ought to think about prehabilitation, too! If osteoarthritis is slowing you down, and you’re considering joint replacement to relieve the pain and get active again, good for you!
A
ccording to the American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons (AAOS) and other sources, more than 1 million total joint replacements will be performed in the US this year, and the number is expected to grow dramatically. Patients are experiencing excellent outcomes, thanks to advances in surgery and better artificial joint materials, and a strong emphasis on patients’ involvement with their own recovery.
The first goal of surgery is, of course, to replace the joint that is causing you pain. Then it’s time to get you back to overall health, and that includes getting active. It’s almost impossible to overstate the benefits of exercise and physical activity for your ongoing health and quality of life. Physical therapy can help put you on the right path, lending guidance and support. There’s a good chance physical therapy will be recommended as part of your treatment. And don’t be surprised if it starts with prehabilitation — also known pre-hab! 31 • MAINE SENIORS
BY KATHY SONAGERE, PT
WHAT IS PRE-HAB?
Pre-hab is just what it sounds like. It’s physical rehabilitation that takes place before your joint replacement surgery. As the length of time shortens that people are actually in the hospital—or need to be in the hospital because of all of the changes in the process of having a joint replacement—prehab can take away any worry that the process might feel rushed. It’s important that patients feel totally educated and prepared and pre-hab is a chance to get in the rehabilitation groove ahead of time. Pre-hab is especially helpful in these three areas: 1. Addressing fitness issues other than the affected joint
For many patients, there’s been a decline in activity levels, which can be months, or sometimes years leading up to the decision to have joint surgery. For example, walking can be different through time because of long-standing osteoarthritis. Think about it yourself: maybe you avoid or limit stair climbing; maybe you don’t walk as far or as long as you used to walk; maybe you favor one leg over
the other. That can lead to a lack of conditioning in other parts of your body, along with the problems in your knees, hips, or other joints. The return of strength, stamina, and function requires an orchestrated exercise plan, both before and after surgery. 2. Getting ready for post-surgery exercise
Physical therapists understand that, if your osteoarthritis has kept you from regular workouts, it’s a big deal to expect you to take the leap and get right into an exercise program after surgery. Prehabilitation is a time to get yourself ready for your upcoming surgery and the post-surgical recovery period. You’ll actually go through a routine of exercises with the therapist, working on pacing, conditioning, strengthening, and getting the exercise routine down. Pre-hab often includes a conversation about getting mentally prepared, too, and will make sure all your questions are answered. 3. Understanding the surgery and rehabilitation process
Having joint replacement surgery is a big decision. Most patients take a joint education class to learn what to expect before, during, and after the surgery. And that’s good, but maybe not enough.
“My OICM surgeon told me they had started a program where they send you to rehab for
a month (before knee replacement surgery). Excellent, excellent! That’s the best thing they could have done, starting a month before. I was so afraid to have the surgery, that I’d have to have crutches. But no. After the surgery I went back to my room and walked right away. The next day they told me I could go home because I was doing so well. On the fourth day I went for rehab. It’s a lot of work, don’t get me wrong. But within two weeks I had no pain. And within a month I had reached all my goals.” —Denise M, OICM knee replacement patient, 2015
DECEMBER 2016 • 3 2
“The more a patient participates in his or her recovery, the faster they can get back to everyday activities. I recommend that my joint replacement patients work with a physical therapist to develop and then follow a specific exercise program. Getting in the best possible shape before surgery can really pay off.” —Dr. Jeffrey L. Bush, Medical Director, OICM
Pre-hab can take it a step further. You might do the pre-hab exercises in a group session with other people who are preparing for the same surgery as you. Quite often, a group will include at least one person who has already had a joint replaced. It’s a terrific opportunity to have conversations and talk about shared experiences, and have the support of a physical therapist to address any questions. Pre-hab is a good way to see how your body feels when you’re exercising. You’ll know for real what kind of shape you’re in, and how to carry the exercise over to your post-surgical time. During pre-hab you’ll also get some valuable information about making your home environment ready and getting your exercise routines thought-out so you’ll be well prepared when you leave the hospital after your procedure.
33 • MAINE SENIORS
IS PRE-HAB FOR YOU?
If you’re considering, or you’re scheduled for joint surgery, talk with your care team. Ask them about pre-hab and how a specific program might work for you. MSM Kathy Sonagere is a licensed physical therapist and the Director of Therapy Services at Central Maine Medical Center (CMMC) Services in Lewiston, Maine. The Central Maine in-patient and out-patient teams support programs at the Orthopaedic Institute of Central Maine (OICM), which is the hospital unit within CMMC dedicated to orthopaedic surgical care and recovery.
Give MSM a call at 207-299-5358 to find out how you can tell your story to our readers in your very own Guest Article.
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SPECIAL
BY ELLEN L. SPOONER
CHRISTMAS:
A Season of Joy and Giving Christmas has always been my favorite time of year. I remember so many past holidays with joy and some tears.
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y Mother loved everything about Christmas and, in our home, it was celebrated for all the right reasons. The house was always ablaze with lights and decorations— a crèche on the mantel. tinsel reflecting the lights and the carefully arranged ornaments on the tree, candles in every window (even those facing the bay, so the sailors could see them), Carols playing, gifts being wrapped, friends stopping by for a visit, midnight mass . . .
Then, there was that Christmas Eve when I was nine years old and I heard “Santa” arranging presents around the tree. I thought everything would change, but it didn’t. As a young adult, I remember watching my own children react 35 • MAINE SENIORS
to that first snowfall, baking and decorating Christmas cookies, reading The Night Before Christmas and other holiday books, anticipating and then watching the annual broadcasts of Rudolph, and Frosty, and Mr. Magoo’s Christmas Carol—long before they were available on DVD. Memories go on and on— decorating the tree, classroom parties, “singing along” with Mitch Miller . . . the expressions on their faces on Christmas morning and overall feelings of love, joy and peace . . . Those days are gone now. My husband and I are alone during much of the holiday season—our children are married with families of their own but, thankfully, they are close by and we see them frequently. Nevertheless, I continue to celebrate Christmas in the same fashion. It’s not just for kids, you know . . . One of my favorite Christmas stories, perhaps my most favorite, is The Polar Express by Chris Van Allsburg. It tells the story of a young boy who is beginning to have doubts about Santa. Having
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been told that only true believers can hear bells, the boy lies in bed on Christmas Eve hoping to hear the bells on Santa’s sleigh. During the night a magical train appears and whisks the boy away to the North Pole where he meets Santa. When directed by Santa to choose a gift, the boy selects a simple but beautiful sounding bell. Santa tells him,“the bell is a wonderful symbol of Christmas—as I am.” Then, he adds,“Just remember, the true spirit of Christmas lies in your heart.” On the return train ride, the boy unknowingly loses the bell. When he awakens the next morning and realizes there is no bell, he wonders if it was all a dream. Later that morning, from amid the discarded wrapping paper and ribbons, the boy hears the sound of the bell and finds it wrapped in a small box under the tree Yes, he hears it and he believes . . . A simple gift with so much significance for it reminds us that Christmas is about giving—not lavish, expensive gifts but those given from the heart to those we love or those who need. I still hear the bell and I believe. Do you? I sincerely hope so. Merry Christmas to all!
MSM
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SPECIAL
Chanukah, 2017 BY MARK D. ROTH This year the festival of Chanukah (or Hanukkah) begins at sundown on December 24, Christmas Eve.
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he holiday falls on the 25th day of Kislev on the Hebrew calendar. The holiday usually falls in either November or December, depending upon whether there is a “leap month” in the calendar during that year. Many people ask, “Why is Chanukah so late (or so early) this year?” Rabbi Larry Milder, former Rabbi with Congregation Beth El in Bangor always responded, “Chanukah isn’t late (or early) this year; it falls just when it is supposed to.” For those folks who might think that Chanukah is the Jewish Christmas because of when it usually falls, that is not the case. It’s a holiday of its own that has its own place in the festivities of the holiday season.
While Chanukah is a very festive holiday celebrated for eight nights, it is also a holiday of great importance to Jews because it celebrates religious freedom. Chanukah commemorates the re-dedication 37 • MAINE SENIORS
of the Second Temple in Jerusalem in the second century B.C. Legend has it that the Jews had risen up against their Greek-Syrian oppressors in the Maccabean Revolt, led by Judah Maccabea. The celebration is for eight nights because the oil that remained in the temple was thought to be just enough to light the lamp for one night. But a miracle happened – the oil lasted eight nights. A special candle holder called a “Chanukiah” is lit each night until all eight candles are lit on the eighth night. Jews around the world exchange gifts, children play the dreidel game (a dreidel is a spinning top), and Jews of all ages eat the delicious potato latkes (pancakes topped with applesauce or other sweet fruit) cooked in oil that represents oil that lasted for the eight nights. It has always given me pleasure to celebrate Chanukah with my children and now with my grandchildren and to remember the reason that we celebrate, knowing that Jews all over the world are celebrating as well. MSM
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A Lifetime of
Kindness
Andrus Winner Frank and Lucy Whiting with AARP Maine's Lori Parham
to Others
BY JANE MARGESSON
In our column, we often highlight inspiring stories from around our state.
T
his year alone, The Maine Point has focused on a couple from Orono who wrote a book about 50 “beyond the usual” Maine destinations, a Navy veteran from Belfast making a difference for female veterans, and a Portland resident’s idea to help those in need through innovative donations. It would be impossible to end the year, however, without mentioning a gentleman from Searsport who was recently honored with AARP’s most prestigious volunteer award, the Andrus Award, named after our founder, Dr. Ethel Percy Andrus.
39 • MAINE SENIORS
Frank Whiting began volunteering at the age of 14 when he recognized that an elderly neighbor needed assistance due to a painful foot condition. Every evening he would go to the neighbor’s home, bathe his feet and legs, and reapply the prescribed dressing. He never missed a day and, thanks to his kindness, the neighbor’s painful ulcers eventually healed. Frank has been volunteering ever since. Now at the age of 80, he continues to volunteer for multiple organizations including his local fire department where he served as a firefighter for 46 years. In 1999, he was honored as the“Firefighter of the Year” in Searsport. A unique factor in Frank’s volunteer career is that it has spanned generations. For the last 16 years, Frank has been a 4-H volunteer
THE MAINE POINT
Frank has been volunteering since he was 14. Now at the age of 80,
he continues to volunteer for multiple organizations including his local fire department where he served
as a firefighter for 46 years.
touches older lives by fundraising to keep them warm and fed. He touches everyone’s life in our community.” What a wonderful and inspiring legacy! As we approach the cold, winter months when so many Mainers become isolated and perhaps even afraid to be alone, Frank’s story is a good reminder of how we can make our own communities a better place for all to live. What inspired a young, 14-year old to reach out to a neighbor in ill health has lasted a lifetime. Do you know someone who lives alone? Do you know someone who might need a hot meal or company over a cup of tea? Sometimes the smallest gestures are the ones that mean the most.
helping to raise money for children’s trips. When his own children were in elementary school, Frank took courses to learn the latest modern mathematics. If he could help them at home, he felt his children might have more fun learning in the classroom. He has also volunteered at Girl Scout campouts and chaperoned many school trips.
If you have stories to tell about caring for others in your community, as a family caregiver or a friend, please consider sharing them at www.iheartcaregivers.org so we can stay connected during the long winter ahead.
His wife, Lucy, says he simply cannot say “no.” She says that “Frank touches young lives by volunteering and setting an example. He
On behalf of all of us at AARP Maine, we wish you and your family a warm and very happy holiday season. MSM
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DECEMBER 2016 • 4 0
LEGACY
Enabling student volunteers The Catholic Foundation of Maine is pleased to announce a new endowment created to honor a woman who touched the lives of countless people.
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he Laurianne Michaud Cormier Endowment will allow for an annual scholarship to be awarded to a Saint Dominic Academy student who excels academically and is a volunteer at St. Mary’s Regional Medical Center in Lewiston or another area health-care facility.
A Lewiston native, Cormier attended Saint Peter’s School and then Cours Supérieur, an upper school for girls. She always dreamed of becoming a nurse, but when she was 11, 41 • MAINE SENIORS
her father died of leukemia. The oldest of six children, she started working to help support her family. “You have a duty to help out, and what we needed was money,” she told Harvest in a 2012 interview. At age 16, Laurianne began working in a shoe factory, a job she was fortunate to keep through the Great Depression. She left to raise her two daughters but later returned and worked until she was age 62, a total of 39 years. In her retirement, Laurianne didn’t slow down. Instead, she fulfilled her lifelong dream to help the sick. She volunteered at St. Mary’s, running errands, bringing patients to X-ray or, as she once put it “doing anything they asked us to do.” She later worked at the front desk, in the pharmacy, and handling mail.
LEGACY
In her retirement, Laurianne didn’t slow down. Instead, she fulfilled her lifelong dream to help the sick. “You want to do, not sit back and do nothing,” she said of her volunteer work. Cormier accumulated nearly 20,000 hours of service over 35 years at St. Mary’s, and in recognition of her contributions, she received the Mayoral Volunteer Inspire by Example Award in 2010 and was named a Volunteer Hero by Maine’s First Lady Ann LePage at the Governor’s Awards for Service and Volunteerism in 2012. Cormier was still helping out at the hospital a short time before her death on June 23, 2015, just two weeks shy of her 103rd birthday. The Laurianne Michaud Cormier Endowment was created by
her daughter Louise Jean and Louise’s husband, Raymond Jean, of Scarborough. The Catholic Foundation of Maine provides people with the opportunity to create lasting endowments to support the work of the Catholic Church in Maine. The endowments benefit parishes, schools, seminarians, and ministries. The Foundation manages the funds to ensure their long-term viability so that the charitable wishes of the donors are carried out. MSM If you would like to learn more about creating an endowment with the Catholic Foundation of Maine or contributing to an existing one, contact Executive Director Elizabeth Badger at (207) 321-7820 or elizabeth. badger@portlanddiocese.org. You may also visit the foundation’s website at www.catholicfoundationmaine.org. Give MSM a call at 207-299-5358 to find out how you can tell your story to our readers in your very own Guest Article.
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DECEMBER 2016 • 4 2
SOMEONE
isoverwatching you
BY WALDO CLARK
During the holiday season, for many the searing emotion of sadness stokes the embers in the hearth of happiness.
I
ndian mystic, guru, and spiritual teacher Osho wrote,“Sadness gives depth. Happiness gives height. Happiness gives branches. Happiness is like a tree going into the sky and sadness is like the roots going down into the womb of the earth.” His poignant words remind me of a story about a 75-year-old man. His wife had passed on in April. No longer in his life, she lived on deep within his heart. On a stone silent night in December, the mantle clock struck eleven. In the background, Judy Garland sang,“Have yourself a merry little Christmas.” He sat on the rug in their living room, legs crossed, staring at the rectangle-shaped box containing Christmas ornaments. Brushing his hand over the top, he carefully removed the lid. Thin sheets of white wrapping paper separated multiple layers of ornaments, purchased over so many Christmas seasons. He took them out, one by one. Each possessed a memory. When he pushed aside the last piece of paper, their favorite ornament, from their first Christmas together, lay on the bottom. It depicted a typical Maine
43 • MAINE SENIORS
coastal lighthouse scene—over the front door hung a large wreath with a scarlet bow; a sleigh stood in front; balsam firs overlooked the sea; stars flickered in the distance. He pressed his lips to it. Then, he spotted an envelope with his name on it, written in her handwriting. He smiled and picked it up gingerly, like a child lifting a sparrow with a broken leg. Inside, he found a note. My Dearest Cyrus, I write this in the last days of my life. No doubt, you’re sad, missing me, on our first Christmas without each other. We made a good go of it, didn’t we. No question mark needed. Scottish poet Alexander Smith said, “Christmas is a day that holds all time together.” Remember that.
I wish that you find joyful hope, as best you can—live on. You must. Here’s my present for you: Until we meet again, someone’s watching over you. Now go to the bookcase and pull out Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol. Love, Helen Cyrus found the book. She’d marked this passage: “I will honour Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. I will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future. The Spirits of all three shall strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons that they teach.” Dear Maine Seniors, if during this festive season, like Cyrus, you feel a lingering sadness, believe that far beyond where the eyes can see, someone’s watching over you. Happy Holidays, Waldo
MSM
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LEGACY TOO
changing seasons
—Changing Investment Landscape— THOMAS DUFF, BRANCH MANAGER • JOEL WEST, FINANCIAL ADVISOR
As December approaches, we reflect on all the things the holiday season can hold in store.
W
e are busy preparing for the holidays and time spent with family and friends, school vacations, and the change of season to winter. Along with the changing season, a changing investment landscape is approaching and it is important to be certain you and your investments are prepared. DEPARTMENT OF LABOR’S FIDUCIARY STANDARD FOR RETIREMENT ACCOUNTS STARTING IN 2017
In 2016, the Department of Labor (DOL) passed a rule (DOL Rule) that effective April 10th, 2017, all paid, professional advice regarding qualified accounts will be required to meet a more stringent Fiduciary standard of advice, rather than the current and less stringent, Suitability standard. While this is not the forum to explain the ins and outs of the new DOL rule change, we do feel 45 • MAINE SENIORS
these new rules are significant and expect the retirement advice industry to materially change as a result. “Qualified” accounts generally mean retirement accounts, and specifically include 401k plans and Individual Retirement Accounts (IRA), in addition to other types of retirement plans. If you are an IRA holder or a participant in a 401k, which the majority of people are, it is very likely this rule will impact you in some way. Fund companies, broker dealers and financial advisors are currently working to adapt to the increased regulation and potential liability that comes with the more rigorous Fiduciary standard. While relatively unreported outside financial circles, financially speaking this is likely the biggest change to come in 2017. After April 10th, 2017, all paid financial professionals will be required to function as Fiduciaries to qualified account holders. There will also be variations of “Best Interest Contract Exemptions” or B.I.C.E agreements that will allow prohibited transactions under the DOL rule. The B.I.C.E. agreements appear to be ‘grandfathering’ provisions, however it is
LEGACY TOO
Be sure to look at whether or not you want to harvest investment losses or gains before year end. Consider contacting your financial professional before year end to see how gains and losses may affect you. not yet clear how they will play out on a long-term basis. Should you have any questions you should contact your financial professional, and if you do not have one we are willing to help answer questions for you. TAXES, TAXES, TAXES
This is being written before the elections, and will be published afterwards, making specific tax prognostications difficult to say
the least. Both candidates of the primary parties for President are offering starkly different views of future taxation landscape. Obviously, we also do not know which political parties will be controlling the national House of Representatives or Senate in the future. At this point the only thing that seems certain is that taxation will change. However, there are a few tax areas that likely will not change with a new president or congress and certainly won’t change before the 2016 calendar year ends. Be sure to look at whether or not you want to harvest investment losses or gains before year end. Consider contacting your financial professional before year end to see how gains and losses may affect you. As a reminder, long term capital gains can generally be offset with long term capital losses. This may be the year to realize some of those long term capital losses if you have any available. Also, remember that in general, long term capital gain tax rates are lower than the tax rates for ordinary income. At times, it may be more advantageous to derive income from capital gains. For example, we are frequently seeing early retirees utilizing long term
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DECEMBER 2016 • 4 6
LEGACY TOO
BEWARE OF FRAUD
The holidays and changing seasons also bring an increase in fraudsters‘working’ to deceive you of your hard-earned money and we know Seniors are particularly vulnerable to fraud and deceit and that’s not just due to aging. The older we get the more time we have to accumulate wealth, so it stands to reason that Seniors hold the majority of material wealth in our country. Being more financially secure compared to younger generations makes Seniors a bigger target for fraudsters. Also, today’s Seniors grew up in an era where they were taught to be more trusting than their children’s or grandchildren’s generations. To further compound the problem, Seniors frequently do not report the fraud because; 1) they do not know where to report the fraud, 2) they are ashamed and do not want to feel judged, and 3) they may have concerns that reporting the fraud may imply they have diminished capacity and are fearful of losing their independence. All of those things combined mean we need to pay particular attention to making sure our Seniors are
Start Your New Year Right capital gains for income, in lieu of qualified distributions (IRA withdrawals) to maintain eligibility for the Affordable Care Act (Obamacare) subsidies before they reach age 65 and are eligible to enroll in Medicare. Speaking further to Obamacare, it is clear that nationwide choices in 2017 are being reduced, while premiums are increasing significantly. Given that the Supreme Court effectually ruled that the Affordable Care Act was constitutional on the grounds that it was a tax, it is clear that this area of taxation should be addressed as soon as possible. Over the age of 70.5 and have a traditional Individual Retirement account (IRA)? Then don’t forget to take your Required Minimum Distribution (RMD) before calendar year end. For practical purposes if you are a traditional IRA account holder and over the age of 70.5, the IRS requires you to complete an RMD every year. Failing to do so can result in a whopping 50% tax penalty. This RMD calculation is based on your age and your previous year end IRA account value. While it is not difficult to calculate the RMD, failing to complete the RMD before year end can obviously be very costly. 47 • MAINE SENIORS
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LEGACY TOO
Internet Fraud and phone phishing continue to target our Seniors. No reputable financial institution will ever call you to ask you to verify your personal information, including bank account numbers, dates of birth, or social security numbers. This information should be guarded and protected as much as possible. If you call your financial institution at a known number, it is ok to give out your personal information to confirm your identity. However, if anyone calls you asking for personal information do not give it out, regardless of how legitimate the person may sound. Gathering this personal information is the first step to identity theft, and identity theft can be potentially, financially catastrophic. With the changing seasons and colder weather, it is not uncommon to see an increase in home improvement fraud. Home improvement fraud occurs primarily in two forms: 1) The fraudulent home repair ‘contractor’ will require the work to be paid for up front only to never complete the work, or 2) the home improvement ‘contractor’ may overcharge for the services being performed. e.g. pay to have asphalt driveway resurfaced and the ‘contractor’ in reality only puts down a coat of sealant or worse, cheap paint. In our experience, a quality contractor will never expect you to pay for the entire project upfront and will always provide a detailed description of the work to be completed,
d rve Res e 50%
Fake Prizes and Sweepstakes are one major source of Senior fraud. Nearly anyone would love to win the lottery or something similar, and fraudsters are great at leveraging that to deceive you of your money. Frequently a fraudulent sweepstake will send a fake check with instructions to deposit the same and personally return a check to them to cover the “taxes”. Meanwhile the fake check will never clear and the check that was written for“taxes” may be unrecoverable.
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The“Season of Giving” also means the increase of bogus charities. We encourage you to only give and donate to legitimate charities and groups that are well established and known to you. Avoid gifting to groups or organizations that you are unfamiliar with or are new to you.
Coming December 2016
Ov
protected from fraud. Be on the lookout for the following and take steps to protect yourself and your loved ones:
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LEGACY TOO
The season and calendar are changing. Know that regulations
possible. Be aware of increased fraudsters and scam artists that increase their activity this time of year. Thank a veteran for their service and enjoy your family, friends and freedoms during this wonderful holiday season! MSM
in writing. If you or a loved one has experienced financial fraud, please contact the Maine Attorney General’s office or your local police department.
The information has been obtained from sources considered to be reliable, but we do not guarantee that the foregoing material is accurate or complete. Any information is not a complete summary or statement of all available data necessary for making an investment decision and does not constitute a recommendation. Any opinions are those of Thomas W. Duff and Joel M. West and not necessarily those of RJFS or Raymond James. Expressions of opinion are as of this date and are subject to change without notice. Past performance may not be indicative of future results. You should discuss any tax or legal matters with the appropriate professional. Duff and Associates, An Independent Firm, 470 N.Main St, Brewer, Me (207) 989-6082. Securities offered through Raymond James Financial Services, Inc. Member FINRA/SIPC
regarding the administration of advice to qualified account holders is materially changing in 2017.
The season and calendar are changing. Know that regulations regarding the administration of advice to qualified account holders is materially changing in 2017. Take time before year end to analyze and take steps to improve your personal tax scenario if
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DECEMBER 2016 • 5 0
A Trail Less Traveled
Keeping Our Woodland Creatures Wild STORY AND PHOTOS BY BRAD EDEN
SUPPLEMENTAL WINTER-FEEDING IS BOTH UNNECESSARY AND POTENTIALLY HAZARDOUS.
Most everyone enjoys viewing wildlife and I’m no exception. It’s especially gratifying to see wild critters on your own property, and my wife and I enjoy a fair share of animals traipsing through our land.
I
t’s not unusual to jump deer in our woodlot and wild turkeys are frequent visitors to our humble abode. We’ve even had the occasional moose pass on through. I was Re: December/A Trail Less Traveledpleased to find that I have an established winter deer yard right out my back door at our ‘new to us house’ in the woods. As much as I enjoy and feel privileged by these wild visitors, I’m glad to see them come and go on their natural wanderings. Unfortunately this is the time of year when many peopRe: December/A Trail Less Traveledle choose to feed wild animals during the winter months. What at face value might appear to be a kind-hearted gesture toward our woodland creatures can, in fact, be detrimental. Rarely does Maine experience a harsh enough 51 • MAINE SENIORS
winter to require supplemental feeding of wild animals. There are exceptions of course, the ice storm of 1998 being an example. Just like many humans who found themselves overwhelmed with cold and darkness for weeks on end, I ran across a fair share of starving turkeys and stressed-out deer. But generally speaking, wild animals are much better off fending for themselves during a typical Maine winter. The Maine Department of Inland Fisheries & Wildlife discourages the supplemental feeding of deer and wild turkeys. Other states such as Vermont have even made it illegal. Aside from the misguided notion that these animals need our help, many simply like to keep the animals on their property for photographing and viewing. Others may think they are helping increase the population. Some may even hope to keep animals in the vicinity for upcoming hunting seasons or to protect them from hunting. The truth is, feeding these wild animal subjects them to predation, motor vehicle accidents, disease transmission, and even
A Trail Less Traveled
Unfortunately this is the time of year when many people choose to feed wild animals during the winter months. But generally speaking,
The natural choice in retirement living
wild animals are much better off fending for themselves during a typical Maine winter.
malnutrition. Deer and turkeys that are traveling to and from feeding stations can cross busy roads and encounter domestic dogs. Predators, such as coyotes, can easily pattern their movements, leaving them vulnerable. Supplemental feeding forces the animals into close proximity of each other, increasing the potential for disease transmission. Competition at feeding sites amongst deer can cause weaker and younger deer to become malnourished. Deer and wild turkeys can become dependent on food such as cracked corn and commercial deer pellets rather than natural browse and foods. Once this happens these wild animals need to be fed through to spring. This can become very expensive. A better approach and the one championed by wildlife professionals is to maintain a good natural habitat year-round so the animals can go about their normal routine and fend for themselves. Planting native plants and shrubs on the back edges of lawns and maintaining woodlots by selective cutting ensures a rich abundance of browse. Preserving oak and beech trees that seasonally drop acorns and beechnuts supply necessary food for deer and wild turkeys. Establishing hemlock and pine groves create canopy and winter yard areas where deer can gather during heavy snow. Just plain keeping some land undeveloped creates havens for winter-weary wildlife. Wild creatures deserve the respect to remain wild, not treated like pets or animals in a zoo. They are remarkably tough and resilient to whatever Mother Nature throws at them. In the end, supplemental feeding of wildlife, although well intentioned, benefits the people doing the feeding more than the animals being fed. MSM
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HEALTH TREASURES
NOT SO SOCIAL
Media
(UNPLUG, AT LEAST FOR THE HOLIDAYS)
BY JOAN CLARK
“Blog,Text, Post, Instant Message, Instagram, Upload, Download, Chat, Scan, Facebook, Email,YouTube, and Tweet … Your Faith…”
T
hese words, appearing in a recent email message caused me to stop and take a step back. I knew I was guilty of partaking in this social media frenzy. But my Lord, now Religion is in the race, too? I felt like I was on a runaway train, and I wanted to get off.
So, I sent a post to my Facebook friends declaring my intent to ‘retire’ from Facebook. This decision was not fleeting. I had been struggling with it for some time. It was not easy either. In fact, it felt a bit like breaking up with someone, or moving away. There was a sense of loss. Making the break (with Facebook) caused me to further analyze social media in general. It resulted in conversations with coworkers, my husband and my children; conversations that lingered in my mind and took hold. As I watch my children navigate their way through the ‘teenage’ years, spending hours upon hours on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat…to name a few, I wonder how social media affects their development. They are trying to define who they are and are not.
53 • MAINE SENIORS
What role does Facebook play in this journey of self-actualization? How will we teach our children the importance of just being quiet for a moment when their every moment must be filled with a 6-second video or a snapchat post. How do they learn to listen to the silence, listen to their inner voice—we all have one. Do my children know how to have purposeful, thoughtful conversation? The best thing I can do as a parent is to try to live by example. I’ve made a mistake. I got caught up in the Facebook frenzy. I am unplugging. And I’d like to offer this challenge to all of my family, friends and peers. The holiday season is upon us. Let’s change up the playing field…put down the iPad, iPod, cell phone, laptop. Stop with the tweets, blogs, and snapchats. Step back into this tangible, physical world with the people who fill your life, sincerely, with love and peace. Contrary to popular opinion, idle moments are good for the heart. Okay kids, let’s go visit Grandpa! MSM
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DECEMBER 2016 • 5 4
HEALTH TREASURES SPECIAL
It was the only thing I wanted. BY LC VAN SAVAGE
There was only one thing I wanted for Christmas in 1946. I was eight years old and really knew my own mind, as all eight-year-olds do, and I hounded my parents to get it for me.
T
hey kept telling me to send a letter to Santa, so I did. I asked that rotund old man for a tommy gun. A genuine toy tommy gun, just like the gangsters used in all those great movies I loved to watch over and over back then. (And even now.) Those wonderful old films were state of the art in the 20s, 30s and 40s. I especially loved it when a big black gangster car drove by some guy’s bar in the middle of a big city owned by a saloon keeper who’d refused to pay protection money. A great thuggish gangster would get out on the running board with his tommy gun and blast that bar owner’s joint while all the patrons ran screaming or ducking behind overturned tables. The camera would pan across the bottles and mirrors behind the bar while all were shattering from the tommy
55 • MAINE SENIORS
gun’s blast, booze flying everywhere. That was just so cool. I simply had to have one of those guns. Tommy guns were Thompson submachine guns invented by General John T. Thompson who hoped the gun would help to end WW I. They were capable of rapidly firing one bullet after another with no need to reload after each shot. A tommy gun shooter didn’t even have to aim—he just had to spray whatever area he chose to destroy, confident at least some of the bullets would hit their mark. Women didn’t have much use for tommy guns back then, either in real life or in the movies. I believe their favorite method of dispatching irksome folks was a nice little wimpy ladylike pearlhandled revolver. I begged and begged for that tommy gun, but was told repeatedly that“little girls don’t play with such things.” That puzzled me. How come boys could? Eventually, to placate my parents I did write to Santa Claus and asked politely for the gun, and confess I lied unabashedly about my past year’s deportment. I told him I already
SPECIAL
INSURANCE
The camera would pan across the bottles and mirrors behind the bar while all were shattering from the tommy gun’s blast, booze flying everywhere. That was just so cool. I simply had to have one of those guns. had a bride doll and a nurse’s costume. Mom and Dad would have much preferred I become a nurse and not Bonnie Parker. Well, the story has a happy ending. There under the tree on Christmas morn of l946, propped up against a big purple beach ball for which my sister had asked Santa, lay my beautiful, glorious, over-sized tommy gun. It was perfect, shiny and black, gleaming beneath the tree’s lights. Oh, I was indescribably thrilled. It was made of tin and had that round drum beneath for the “bullets” to feed into the barrel. This gorgeous gun did have a discreet little crank handle which, when turned, made a nice loud facsimile of a machine gun’s sound. I roared about the house, gunning down everyone, including the dog. I raced outside to show my chums and they happily obliged me when I shot at them, by stiffening up, throwing their arms into the air, emitting a horrendous shriek and falling dramatically dead into the snow. I was one happy little girl, up at dawn rat-a-tat-tatting nonstop till way after bedtime. (I fired then at gangsters beneath my covers.) Sometime after New Year’s however, that little crank mysteriously disappeared from my tommy gun and so, with its noise-making propensities gone, I pretty soon lost interest. In l947 I pleaded for a tuba but never got it. I wish you the merriest holidays, everyone. I hope you get your tommy gun this year, whatever it may be. MSM
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in praise of the timeless
Chocolate Cookie
BY FIA MARQUIS
There's something magical about the simple chocolate cookie. Whether plain and unadorned or dressed up in any of a dozen ways (and believe me, these days, we're anything but starved for options), this childhood favorite has a place in every cookie jar—but it's particularly well-suited for Christmas.
C
hristmas cookies come in all shapes, sizes, and flavors: charming iced sugar cookies, spiced and dusted German pfeffernusse, versatile chocolate chip (every cookie baker's "cheat" for when they run out of inspiration), and classic gingerbread. But somehow, nothing feels quite as made-forthe-holidays as rich, decadent chocolate.
Maybe it's childhood that drives so many of us to associate the rich, sweet treat with Christmas Eve: hot cocoa by the fire (or woodstove, or these days, maybe even one of the fireplace screensavers you
57 • MAINE SENIORS
can find on Netflix), aromas drifting from the oven. Regardless, chocolate is one of my go-to holiday flavors, and I never tire of finding new ways to work with it. When I bake for the holidays (or any large group or gathering, really), I try to keep it simple. Strong, classic pairings tend to appeal to the greatest number of people, and rarely result in a wheelbarrow full of leftovers to carry home. Plus, it means I don't have to make a half-dozen different kinds of cookie to please all the different sets of tastebuds in the room...though I'll admit I sometimes find myself doing that regardless (there are times when I won't be satisfied with anything less than the vanilla-cardamon-chai-latte cookie I've been KITCHEN TIP: Don't be afraid to experiment when you don your apron
to bake up a batch of cookies. The key to a successful modification is to stick with a solid, foolproof base recipe and vary the topping, flavoring, mix-ins, or fillings. Don't forget—you get to eat your mistakes, guiltfree. My Mom always called that "the cook tax".
Maybe it's childhood that drives so
many of us to associate the rich, sweet treat with Christmas Eve: hot cocoa by the fire (or woodstove, or these days, maybe even one of the fireplace screensavers you can find on Netflix), aromas drifting from the oven. brainstorming, even if I know most of my friends and family really just want oatmeal or chocolate chip). This year, though, I find myself making a lot of filled cookies. They're quick, delicious, easy to customize, and make for a nice surprise when your guests take that first bite. They also lend themselves well to "accessorizing" chocolate (which, despite its distinctive flavor, is an incredible chameleon).
The first cookie I made for this issue (well, actually two, but they're related) takes a rich, dark chocolate base and adds a special surprise: a piece of candy (either a Haviland Original Thin Mint, or a Haviland Raspberry Thin Mints), making for a nice, chewy, gooey bite. I also enhanced the flavor of the candy center with Watkins flavored extract in the dough. There are many other flavored fondant-type candies on the market (including York Peppermint Patties and Haviland's own Orange Thin Mints), and all are equally good at acting as the filling in this recipe. My second cookie takes the same chocolate base and stretches it even further from the starting point by incorporating espresso powder, creamy caramel, and a dash of salt—creating a salted caramel mocha bite that's impossible to put down (just ask my husband; I think he ate six of these the day I first baked them). No matter what your crowd prefers, there's a chocolate cookie that's perfect for each. I know in my family, it just wouldn't be Christmas without them. MSM
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Featured Recipes LYRIC "KISSES" COOKIES INGREDIENTS:
2 cups all-purpose flour 1 cup unsweetened cocoa powder 1 teaspoon baking powder 1 teaspoon salt 1 stick butter-flavored Crisco 3 cups sugar 4 large eggs, room temperature 2 teaspoons raspberry or peppermint extract 1 1/4 cups chocolate chips, melted 1 1/4 cups mini chocolate chips Haviland Original or Raspberry Thin Mints colored sugar (coordinate with flavor)
DIRECTIONS: 1. Preheat oven to 375°F. 2. In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, cocoa, baking powder, and salt; set aside. In a separate bowl, cream together Crisco and sugar until light and fluffy. 3. Add eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition; mix in vanilla and melted chocolate. Gradually add flour mixture; mixing just until combined. Fold in chocolate chips. 4. Form dough into pucks about and inch and a half across around a Thin Mint center. Sprinkle with colored sugar and bake until edges are dry, approximately 12 minutes. 5. Transfer cookies to a wire rack to cool completely— and enjoy!
SALTED CARAMEL MOCHA COOKIES INGREDIENTS:
2 cups all-purpose flour 1 cup unsweetened cocoa powder 1 tablespoon instant espresso powder 1 teaspoon baking powder 2 sticks salted butter 3 cups sugar 4 large eggs, room temperature 2 teaspoons vanilla extract 1 1/4 cups chocolate chips, melted 1 1/4 cups chocolate chunks Milk Duds (or other chocolate-covered caramel) sea salt
DIRECTIONS: 1. Preheat oven to 375°F. 2. In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, cocoa, baking powder, and salt; set aside. 3. Cream together Crisco and sugar until light and fluffy. 4. Add eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition; mix in vanilla and melted chocolate. Gradually add flour mixture; mixing just until combined. Fold in chocolate chunks. 5. Form dough into pucks about and inch and a half across around a Milk Dud center. Sprinkle with coarse sea salt and bake until edges are dry, approximately 12 minutes. 6. Transfer cookies to a wire rack to cool—and enjoy!
59 • MAINE SENIORS
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FROM THE PORCH
Home for
Christmas BY HUNTER HOWE
Dusk disappeared into a desperate darkness. A storm surge descended on the black silent night. Howling winds and waves of whipping snow created massive drifts and destructive havoc in the Maine hamlet. The temperature plummeted with each savage gust.'
T
he man, a stranger, pulled his tweed wool cap tight around his ears. He watched the house.
An old oak concealed his presence. Sleet stung his exposed face. Seeking warmth, he rubbed his gloved hands together, kicked his boots like a horse stomping the ground, and brushed fast accumulating flakes off his shoulders. A ferocious blast pushed him toward the porch, piled high with the frozen white. The swirling snow obscured the glow from a weather-beaten lantern.
The dimly lit turn-of-the-century house stood secure, fortress-like, from winter’s onslaught. A light snapped on in a room above the 61 • MAINE SENIORS
porch. A figure, a woman, appeared in the window and started to yank down a shade. She stopped and pressed her face against the frosted glass. The watcher was being watched. A few moments later, she opened the front door, just a crack. Tall and slim with angular features and curly ash gray hair, she eyeballed him, long and hard.“You there, in the shadows, who are you, what do you want?” He took off his cap, revealing drooping eyelids, and ran a hand through his tousled hair.“I’m Wilbur. I’ve come a long way.” “Lost, are you?” “No, I’m homesick,” he said in a deep Down East accent. “It’s Christmas Eve, there’s a blizzard blowing, a whiteout, and you’re standing there, bent over and battered, blabbering about being homesick. I’m calling the sheriff, some quick.” She started to close the door. “Please don’t. I … I used to live here.” He pointed toward the house and hung his head.“I just … wanted to come … to remember … my
FROM THE PORCH
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“I can see that, Wilbur.” Snow pellets preyed on the windows, flames flickered in the fireplace. He glanced around the room.“What are you looking at?”
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“My father put our tree crammed full of popcorn chains and candy canes in that corner, to the left of the fireplace. He sat over there by the bookcase. I can see him now; pipe cupped in his hand, fleecelined slippers, legs crossed, a quiet smile of approval. My mother baked blueberry and apple pies in the kitchen. My word, she had such a patient way about her. My sisters, wearing ruby red and forest green flannel night gowns, laughed, bursting with joy. We were happy here in this house so long ago.” He stood.
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last Christmas here.” “Last Christmas?” She stepped out on the slippery porch, shivered and pulled her frayed beige sweater close about her.“You lived here, when?” “Seventy three years ago.” She placed a forefinger on her chin. He looked like a scared, scrawny puppy in need of a hug. She shook her head as if to admonish herself, then waved him in. “I must be loony.” Short of stature and slow of gait, he moved past her into the foyer.“Take off those boots right quick now, scarf and coat too.” He did as told, grateful to be out of the cold. “Go into the parlor.” He nodded, shuffled into the cozy room and sat in an overstuffed chair, feet dangling. She followed, removed the fireplace screen and stoked the struggling fire.“I’m Agnes.” She sat opposite this peculiar man, leaned forward and scrutinized him.“Stop fidgeting. Fess up now, what’s going on, what’s your story. No sad eyes and no nonsense either.” “I mean no harm. Everyone’s gone. I’m alone.”
He walked from room to room recalling his childhood memories— touching, thinking and smiling. They ascended the stairs and ambled along the corridor overlooking the first floor. He stopped outside a bedroom door and reached for the knob. She thrust her hand out. “Don’t, my husband died in there two years ago.” She closed her eyes. “He survived for several years, sliding away, consumed by cancer.” Wilbur’s lips quivered. “Agnes, my mother died in there too, that last Christmas. Her heart betrayed her.” They stared at each other. A hush gripped the hallway. Then, he slumped against the wooden banister. Sensing his anguish, she clutched his hand and buried her face against his chest. “This is all too much, not on this night, not on Christmas Eve.” Composing herself, she scurried down the stairs back to the parlor. He followed. Neither spoke. The mantel clock bonged eleven times breaking the stillness inside the house. “My father took the tree down the next morning on Christmas day. It was never the same again.” He took a deep breath. “I miss the innocence of my youth and the sense of security, the comfort of it all. I miss someone telling me that it’ll be all right. I miss the smells of the tree and the turkey cooking and the hot cider and the smoke from the wood stove. I miss the sounds of their cheerful voices. I miss my Springer Spaniel, Chauncey.” He paused. “Most of all, I miss the noise of Christmas.” His eyes misted up. “It’s difficult to get old, Agnes.” He labored to rise.“I should go.” DECEMBER 2016 • 6 2
FROM THE PORCH
In a soft whisper she said, “I have a confession to make dear man. My loneliness consumes me. It aches.” She gazed up at the ceiling. “I suppose we’re two lost souls alone together on Christmas Eve. I know one thing though, I can’t bear to be lonesome tonight. Please Wilbur, stay.” “Do you hear that, Agnes?” “What?” “No sound, the storm’s subsided, a silent night again.” Grabbing her wrist, he said,“come.” He opened the front door.“Look, it’s stopped snowing. See those stars, they’re showing the way for lost souls.” He felt a hand squeeze his arm. “I have something.” She rushed back to the parlor, opened a cabinet, reached in and pulled out a record. Her fingers caressed it. “Bing Crosby’s‘I’ll Be Home for Christmas,’ my husband’s favorite. How appropriate.” “I have something too.” He winked and pushed against a panel in the bookcase. One side slid open. Withdrawing an object, he turned it
63 • MAINE SENIORS
over and over in his hands. “Like a devious pirate, I hid a precious treasure, my mother’s favorite Christmas ornament.” “Wilbur, this house connects us in so many ways, marvelous memories and shared sorrow. All those years … so many what ifs. I suspect I’ve been stuck a bit, staggering under the weight of all that emotional burden. It’s somewhat tolerable to keep the sorrow, like a straightjacket, up there in that room, but this house doesn’t have to be a tomb dragging both of us down under, does it?” “I’ve traveled a long road, Agnes, in this life of mine. Now, there are only a few steps left on the last turn of a short road.” He grinned. “Let’s make the time count. Later, we’ll step out and pick us a tree and place it right where my father did. It’s a start, it’s something. What do you think?” She put her hands on her hips.“Who would have thought. A pintsized chap shows up on my doorstep in the dead of winter … oh my … oh Wilbur … welcome home.” They pressed their heads together, these two gentle spirits, glimpsing hope in the twilight of their years on Christmas Eve. MSM
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