Winter 2019 Maine Seniors Magazine

WINTER 2019 • $5.95 MESENIORS.COM

Inside: • A Tribute to President George HW Bush • Gary Crocker and Maine Humor • Steve Maines, Artist and Author • Angels Among Us • Celebrate Chocolate: Cocoa Drop Cookies • A Valentines Story • Winter Fun

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Maine Seniors Magazine is published in the State of Maine by Maine Seniors Magazine, L.L.C. in association with Maine Media Consulting, L.L.C. All information herein represents the views of individual writers and their understanding of the issues at hand, and may not represent the views of the Maine Seniors Magazine, its management, or editorial staff. For more information about Maine Seniors Magazine, visit www.meseniors.com.

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Publisher's Note

In the New Year, many of us look forward to and hope for improvement in our quality of life.

Who is most responsible for this? We are!

I

am sure we agree that aging beats the alternative. Although, we live in a culture that is youth obsessed and is all too dismissive of seniors. Yet, seniors have the most experience and wisdom and are the reason that Maine has the highest volunteer rate in the nation.

Also, seniors are the philanthropists. In Maine, folks 62 and over control 70 per cent of the wealth and are the“influentials”.

Why is it then we see so much ageism in this so-called“social equity” era?

The concept for “social-equity” is heavily discussed and promoted in colleges and among our youth and somehow does not apply to a basic level of common decency and respect for our seniors and our traditions.

To quote Dr. Len Kaye in this month’s Sage Lens column,“One way we can all fight ageism and the negative perception of old age, is to be more intentional in how we describe older people by avoiding the use of negative and pessimistic terms.” Len also suggests, that we need to “own” our age by thinking differently about education, work, and retirement. It is about raising expectations in later life and demanding what we want.

In Maine approximately 1,000 people per month turn 65. According to the Social Security Administration, the average 65-year-old woman today will live to 87, and man to 83, with one out of every four living beyond 90 years of age.

Living longer and healthier does dictate that seniors have many more years of productive capacity. In Maine, we see this with more folks staying in the workplace longer, taking up part-time occupations, volunteering in the communities in a variety of capacities, including serving on boards and participating with civic organizations.

At Maine Seniors we promote Senior Power as Maine’s greatest natural resource, because we need our senior partners to stay in the game. This and every issue of Maine Seniors Magazine is dedicated to you and is our way to celebrate Senior Power!

Keep warm and cheers to a great new year, for all of our Senior Partners.

—David S. Nealley, Publisher

JANUARY 2019 • 2

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WINTER 2019 ISSUE

Page 5

2 Publisher's Note

BY DAVID S. NEALLEY

5 Prime Mover: A Tribute to President George

Herbert Walker Bush • BY PAULETTE OBOYSKI

13 Prime Mover: Gary Crocker

BY SHELAGH TALBOT

19 Prime Mover: Steve Maines

BY SHEILA D. GRANT

29 Sage Lens: Introducing New Approaches

to Think About Aging • BY DR. LEN KAYE

33 Just Pondering: Gadgets, Gizmos

& Gimmicks • BY WALDO CLARK

35 The MAINE Point: Angels Among Us

Page 13

BY JANE MARGESSON

37 Special: Love Poems: A Valentine's Story

BY WENDY C. KASTEN

41 A Trail Less Traveled: Unwelcome Winter

Houseguests • BY BRAD EDEN

43 Here, There & Everywhere: A Quick Trip

to Florida • BY SHELAGH TALBOT

47 Bucket List: A Bend in the Road

BY LARRY GRARD

Page 19

49 A Look Back: Winter Fun

BY CLYDE TARR

51 Food for Thought: Celebrate National

Chocolate Month • BY ELLEN L. SPOONER

53 From the Porch: A Way to Travel

BY HUNTER HOWE

Recycled paper made in Maine

Page 37

JANUARY 2019 • 4

PRIME MOVER President Bush at Walkers Point with Zach & Sully the Dog

George HW Bush, Naval Aviator Cadet

A Tribute to President

George Herbert Walker Bush

BY PAULETTE OBOYSKI

Content from our November 2018 Issue

President George H.W. Bush was born on June 12, 1924 in Milton, Massachusetts to Dorothy Walker Bush and Prescott Bush (Republican Senator of Connecticut 1952-1962).

H

e married the love of his life, Barbara Pierce of Rye, New York during wartime on January 6, 1945. (She recently passed away on April 17, 2018.)

Their five children are President George W. Bush (43), former 5 • MAINE SENIORS

Florida Governor John (Jeb) Bush, Neil, Marvin, Dorothy Bush Koch. A sixth child, Robin, died of leukemia in 1953.

He has 17 grandchildren and 7 great-grandchildren.

On June 12, 1942, President Bush enlisted in the Navy during World War II on his 18th birthday—the same day that he graduated from Phillips Academy, Andover, Massachusetts.

He became the youngest pilot in the Navy at that time, when he was commissioned as an ensign. He served aboard the USS San Jacinto, flying Grumman Avenger torpedo bombers with the 3rd and 5th Fleets.

A Tribute to President George H.W. Bush

President Bush, Mrs. Bush, and Millie the Dog leave Marine One

JANUARY 2019 • 6

PRIME MOVER

George HW Bush Takes Oath of Office as 41st President 20 January 1989

During his time in the war, Bush flew 58 missions, making 126 carrier landings, and recording 1,228 hours of flight time. He was decorated with gold wings, the Distinguished Flying Cross, an Air Medal with Gold Stars, the Asiatic-Pacific Campaign Medal with Three Battle Stars, the World War II Victory Medal, the American Campaign Medal and the Selective Service Medal. He was discharged from active duty on Tuesday, September 18, 1945.

After the war, Bush graduated Phi Beta Kappa from Yale in 2 ½ years with a degree in economics and a minor in sociology. He and his wife, Barbara, moved to Texas and Bush became an oil field supply salesman and later co-founded an oil development company, a petroleum corporation while pioneering in experimental offshore drilling equipment.

The future President began his public service when he was elected to the U.S. House of Representatives for Texas’ 7th 7 • MAINE SENIORS

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On November 29, 1992, President George H.W. Bush recognized the Dover-Foxcroft, Maine Affiliate of Literacy Volunteers of America as the 968th Daily Point of Light. Just prior to leaving office in January, 1993, President and Mrs. Bush hosted an appreciation ceremony and reception for Points of Light from around the nation. Sheila Grant, the affiliate’s executive director at that time, along with Betty Ellis, co-founder of the affiliate, were invited to the reception to represent all of the Points of Light from Maine.

Sheila and Betty were surprised to discover on event day, that they were also part of a small group which had been selected to appear on stage with President Bush throughout the ceremony in the East Room of the White House.

Barbara with President Bush at Walkers Point

District serving from 1966 to 1970. In 1971, he became U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations and in 1973, became Chairman of the Republican National Committee and served as Chief of the U.S. Liaison Office in China. He was appointed Director of the Central Intelligence Agency in 1976. From 1981 to 1988, he served two terms as Vice President to President Ronald Reagan.

In 1989, he was elected as the 41st President of the United States.

Former President George H.W. Bush (41) is truly an American hero and a man who has lived his life dedicated to his family and has served his country in many extraordinary ways. Thank you for your service, Mr. President and God Bless your family.

MSM 9 • MAINE SENIORS

Publisher's Note In the spring of 1992, while working at Snow & Nealley Company, I was contacted by the Office of the Chief of Protocol of the US Department of State. They were working to secure a premium quality American-made garden tool set, as per request of President Bush, for the leader of Chile, Patricio Aylwin.

Aylwin had brought democracy to Chile and apparently, he was an avid gardener. Soon he would be visiting with President and Mrs. Bush. I spoke with my mother, Lois Nealley who was the President of Snow & Nealley Company, and we decided that we should send two of our garden tool gift packs, one for Patricio Aylwin and one for George and Barbara.

A Tribute to President George H.W. Bush

Memorial Across from Walkers Point

Bush Family at Walkers Point, 2000

JANUARY 2019 • 1 0

PRIME MOVER

Flowers laid in memory of Bush with view of Walkers Point • Photo by Beth Simpson Robie

Publisher's Note (continued) My mother decided to enclose a note to President Bush with the closing, From one President to Another, Lois Nealley, President, Snow & Nealley, Bangor, Maine.

(Please see the thank you card from President Bush and note his closing remark.)

A few years later I met President Bush at a fund raiser for Susan Collins in Kennebunkport. I introduced myself as David Nealley of Snow & Nealley of Bangor, and made reference to the garden tools we had sent. President Bush then told me to “say hello to your mother from one President to another”.

So many people all over the world and especially in these United States of America had the privilege to benefit from the Bush family. We are so glad that they always kept a special place in their hearts for those of us in Maine too. May the Bush family continue to enjoy Walker’s Point and the grace and love of George and Barbara.

11 • MAINE SENIORS

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PRIME MOVER

Gary Crocker at Wreaths Across America Event

Gary

Crocker

How he saved himself and others When I met Comedian Gary Crocker

for the first time I was struck by his boundless energy and zest for living, even though he has officially entered his seventh decade.

H

e owes it all to early lessons in life and a deep appreciation for the people he has met along the way.

“Don’t I love doing Standup and making people laugh!” he exclaimed when we sat down for this interview.

With his round glasses, mustache and a brilliant pink flamingo embroidered on his buffalo plaid shirt, he’s a friendly sort of guy, 13 • MAINE SENIORS

BY SHELAGH TALBOT

and I could see how folks would naturally relax around him.

That receptivity makes it easy for one to laugh, and Crocker’s jokes are perfect; especially when it comes to his humorous take on the people of Maine.

So, what does a kid without any interest in studies do to get by at school? Be the Class Clown; and it didn’t hurt to be funny at home too. “I was terrible at school,” Crocker admitted. “But I discovered that when my father was upset and lecturing me on my poor grades, if I could make him laugh a little, he wasn’t so hard on me. That’s how I learned my first critical lessons in timing and how much joking I could get away with from those encounters with Dad. He was much easier on me when he was

Gary explains Maine words

PRIME MOVER • Gary Crocker

chuckling about something funny I might have said. It really took the edge off.”

As it turned out, Crocker’s grades were so poor he felt he didn’t have a shot at college. “So, I joined the Navy instead,” he said.

He chose that branch of the service in order to avoid going to Vietnam. “I thought our ship was sailing to the Mediterranean, so I had visions of exotic ports of call in nice warm weather,” he explained. “But instead we were diverted to the waters around Vietnam. Yup, I’m a member of the Tonkin Gulf Yacht Club,” he quipped! “I’ve lost some of my hearing because of all the guns going off. We must have fired at least 46 thousand eight-inch rounds at that country. And, often I used my ability to tell jokes in the Navy to get through some tough times. More often than not, it really helped.”

Thanks to his time in the service, Crocker was eligible for the GI Bill and decided to attend college after working at a local mill.

“Now that’s a place where you need a sense of humor, I tell ya!” he said referring to the mill.“When I started college at University of Maine at Augusta, I took as many speech classes as I could find.

After two years, I transferred to Orono.” He graduated and later earned a Master’s Degree in Adult Education at the University of Southern Maine. All during college Gary continued honing his craft as a standup comedian.

His first paid appearance was for the Kiwanis Club in Augusta.

“They were looking for a speaker,” he said.“And I was at the right place at the right time. They gave me a pen for compensation.

And it was a darn nice pen, too!”

Crocker unregistered Maine Guide

JANUARY 2019 • 1 4

PRIME MOVER Gary on his Triumph

His career began taking off, all “by word of mouth,” he said. “I didn’t have an agent or anything. People would see me perform and then suggest another opportunity. I started to get pretty busy. Word of mouth took me all the way to California and many states in between.”

One time, Crocker’s sense of humor truly saved his life and potentially the lives of a number of other people. He was a part-time Police Officer in Hallowell. “Yup, I graduated from the Police Academy, too,” he offered. One day he was called to a possible shooting scene and raced across town with sirens blaring. “There was a guy there who had just been fired and he wanted his paycheck. His boss had told him he had to wait until the end of the week, and that guy was having none of that – and he threatened to kill his boss if he was not paid that day. I remember unsnapping my holster as I went in – I wanted to be ready. Eventually I was able to calm him down, get him his money and no one was hurt. Then years later I met that same guy who had threatened to shoot his manager and he thanked me for

“I met Ellen, the most beautiful woman to ever come out of Cornville, Maine and later she confessed that

the real reason she married me was that I made her laugh!”

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15 • MAINE SENIORS

Humorist shares stories

PRIME MOVER • Gary Crocker

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something I didn’t Crocker’s sense of humor The Park Danforth! Pink Flamingo 6/18/2017 3:11:29 PM the reason for his realize had was 6/18/2017 3:11:29 PM happened. He told marriage. “I met Ellen, the me that he planned most beautiful woman to to kill me as well as ever come out of Cornville, his boss, but I had Maine and later she Personalized Senior Living Since 1881 confessed that the real reason said something she 777 married me was that • Portland, Maine 04103 funny that made Stevens Avenue I made her laugh!” he grinned. him pause. And, 207.797.7710 because I had www.parkdanforth.com He has entertained people made him laugh, all across the country and the situation was one gentleman, whom he totally changed.”

Untitled-2 1met after speaking at Penn 6/18/2017 3:11:29 PM He leaned back in State University asked him to come to his summer home in his seat. “I found Maine. “He said, ‘I love your show so much we’d like you to come out that humor to Jonesport every Fourth of July for the rest of your life!’ That was can save lives, even something! My wife Ellen and I went there for a number of years if you’re not aware and had a great time. And even met and became close friends with of it at the time.” the former head swim coach at Penn State during those visits.”

JANUARY 2019 • 1 6

PRIME MOVER

"Everything good that has ever

happened to me in my life has had a foundation in comedy.”

Even though Crocker was pretty busy with his standup shows, he also was an advocate for community colleges throughout Maine.

He spent a good deal of time at the State House in Augusta. It was only a matter of time before he was asked to speak and as far as he knows he is the only humorist who has been invited to speak in both the Maine House of Representatives and the Senate.“That was something, being asked up to the rostrum,” he said.“But the best part, I made‘em laugh and also made some very good lifelong friends along the way.” He works with everyone on both sides of the aisle.“I’m not partisan,” he grinned. He shares a love of motorcycles with Angus King; they’ve gone on charitable rides together, and he still does an annual ride with Angus, Dan Wathen and Glenn Poole. He considers Republicans Paul Davis and Ken Fredette, as well as Democrats Mike Michaud and Sharon Libby Jones good friends.

One of his mentors, Katie Perry wrote for Maine Seniors Magazine before her death.“She was a great lady, so encouraging to me and she was wonderfully quirky. She actually had a predemise party where she pretended she had already passed away.

She even showed up in a hearse! I was the emcee for that. Katie explained to her guests that she didn’t want to miss out on a good time!” Perry and Crocker had even been working on a comedic movie script before her passing, along with Roger Pomerleau, Gay Grant and her daughter. “Of course, they had me writing most of the humor scenes,” he said.

Crocker has a number of CDs out, filled with his wonderful stories and jokes and he’s still available for appearances. “I just can’t seem to stop,” he grinned.“It’s too much fun and if there’s one thing this world needs right now, it’s more humor. People don’t laugh enough and for me, it’s been my lifeline! Everything good that has ever happened to me in my life has had a foundation in comedy.” For information on CDs or availability, contact Gary Crocker at (207) 462-3774, or visit his website: www. garycrocker.com. Your funny bone will thank you!

MSM 17 • MAINE SENIORS

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PRIME MOVER

Steve Maines

Humanitarian, Artist, Author

BY SHEILA D. GRANT

For many years, Steve Maines, 75,

of Abbot, was known as the go-to guy for wonderful family portraits and senior photographs.

T

hese days, he’s a study hall monitor at Foxcroft Academy in Dover-Foxcroft.“My ambition is to empower students,” he said. “I am having an incredible, wonderful time and I enjoy it immensely. For me, it’s not working at all!”

What has not been as well known, until the recent publication of his book, Dancing with Spirit, Reflections from the Mirror of

19 • MAINE SENIORS

Life, is that Maines has traveled the globe taking photographs for various relief organizations and volunteering wherever he could, as well as taking the family on home-school adventures.

Listening to Maines, or reading about his adventures, one might assume that he is a wealthy jet-setter, but nothing could be further from the truth. The Maines family lives in a cabin hewn from trees that he planted alongside his own father many years ago.

“We built the house from all local products except for bricks that were imported from somewhere downstate,” Maines said.“The rocks were carried up from the stream, and we used Monson

PRIME MOVER • Steve Maines

Our community is a blending of thoughtful design, excellent service, genuine caring, and small personal touches, making life at Parker Ridge a joyful experience. Our wellness programs help you get the most out of life by staying fit and healthy, and with staff on duty 24 hours per day, you can feel secure that help is there when you need it.

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Listening to Maines, or reading about his adventures, one might assume that he is a wealthy jet-setter, but nothing could be further from the truth. slate. We even used cotton insulation made from denim jean scraps instead of fiberglass insulation.”

The Maines family uses alternative energy sources whenever possible, and grows much of their own food. There aren’t a lot of toys (snowmobiles, jet skis, etc.) but the family always finds ways to have fun together, he said.

Maines remembers pretending to be a photographer as a young child but, “eventually, my camera broke and I switched to something else.”

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When it came time to attend college, “I decided to follow a few of my best friends and become an engineer and make lots of money,” he said, laughing.

After graduation, Maines went to work in a paper mill. Then

Maines said that Red Lake in Bolivia looked like something from another planet.

JANUARY 2019 • 2 0

PRIME MOVER

his draft notice arrived, informing him that his options were get drafted, or join the army.“I chose the army,” he said. While many veterans might share a story of battle, Maines likes to tell the tale of water skiing behind a gunboat on the Mekong River in Vietnam. “We were zooming in and out of little coves, dodging logs and trees and having a pretty good time, until suddenly, they gave it full throttle and made a beeline for home,” he recalled. As soon as they arrived at the dock, Maines climbed out of the water asking why they had returned so quickly. His friends replied, “You didn’t hear gunfire? Someone was shooting at you!”

“It would have been very interesting to hear the Vietcong sharpshooter’s story of this event,” said Maines.

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Maines didn't think much of this photo he "just grabbed" in Ecuador, but the W. K, Kellogg Foundation won an award using this as its cover art.

21 • MAINE SENIORS

PRIME MOVER • Steve Maines

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More Music.

Music. Better BetterVariety Variety More Maines met this young girl in traditional tribal garb in northern Thailand.

While many veterans might share a story of battle, Maines likes to tell the tale of water skiing behind a gunboat on the Mekong River in Vietnam.

Upon returning to civilian life, Maines discovered that the paper mill he worked at was closing, and paper mills nationwide were laying off workers. He and former wife Chris decided to go to Australia because “the Australian embassy assured us that there were plenty of jobs in the Australian paper industry.” That turned out not to be the case. Maines ended up taking a job as a photo chemist, and it was at Ilford Films that his passion for photography was reignited.

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“We spent 13 months traveling overland to London, and I used this time to study and

practice photography."

After two years in Australia, the couple decided to return home.

Both had been working and saving money, which allowed them to take a year off. They hitchhiked across Australia, and took “every means of transportation possible” up through Indonesia.

In Singapore, “we bought a car, lots of camera equipment, darkroom equipment and books on photography, then headed homeward,” recalled Maines. “We spent 13 months traveling overland to London, and I used this time to study and practice photography. Whenever we stopped in a little hotel or guest house for more than four or five days, I would turn the bathroom

Maines captured the misty mountain backdrop to the Inca ruins in Machu Picchu, Peru 23 • MAINE SENIORS

PRIME MOVER • Steve Maines

in Thailand, got home, Maines said he was a “full-fledged selftaught photographer.” His skill behind the camera, and his large heart when people in other nations experienced a tsunami or other crisis, has landed Maines numerous combined photo assignments and volunteer opportunities for a variety of relief agencies.

Maines traveled to Russia (the first time) with the Global Family organization. He’s done photography for the American Baptist Mission, CARE, the Christian Children’s Fund, and several other organizations over the years.

Maines considers Ruzi Sharif, the People's Artist ofUzbekistan, to be his long-lost brother and "the most incredible man I've ever met."

into a darkroom, develop film, make prints and critique them.”

By the time the couple, and their newborn son who arrived

Eventually, he and Chris parted ways. In 1991, Maines remarried to wife Martha. His sons from the two marriages are Adam, Martin, Jeremy, Ian, Ben and Sam. Maines “helped out” in Banda Aceh, Indonesia after the 2004 tsunami. Maines felt compelled to go help out after the disaster, even though the $1,400 fare was not in the family budget. By chance, a timely check for some of his photography provided

Travel has been a large part of the Maines family's homeschool educational process - by any means necessary!

JANUARY 2019 • 2 4

PRIME MOVER

Maines was fascinated by the prayer wheels these Tibetan refugees were turning in Kathmandu, Nepal.

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the necessary funds. While there doing photography for relief agencies, Maines spent the month after the tsunami “working with people and helping. The thing I noticed was that most agencies would come in, teach the kids something, or make sure people had food, and then go home,” Maines said.“These people didn’t really have anyone to communicate with and talk to about what they had been through. I couldn’t walk more than 100 feet without getting invited into a home for tea, or to talk and just listen to what they went through. I found myself doing that day and night. There were some kids, but mostly older people.

It was totally amazing.”

Maines has traveled both solo, and with the family as volunteers, vacationers, and as part of his sons’ homeschooling, in Peru, Paraguay, West Africa, Costa Rica, Guatemala, Bolivia, Thailand, Chile, Ecuador, Germany, Burma (now Myanmar) and Haiti.

PRIME MOVER • Steve Maines

Maines met these boys in the West African nation of Togo.

When Maines came upon this man on the road in the Southeast Asian country of Malaysia, the duo simply studied each other until someone who could translate came along.The man said he was an elephant hunter with no luck, having never shot an elephant.

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PRIME MOVER

Maines often works with children during his travels, helping them learn English. Other relief efforts have included everything from saving sea turtles to spending time with the‘invisible’ street beggars of India. And everywhere, his camera captures the smiles and souls of the native people.

It’s no accident that Maines is somehow able to bring out so much of the nature of a people or place in his photography.

He is a spiritual seeker, learning as much as he can about various religions around the globe, and considering all humans to be his brothers and sisters.

While he and his family were nearly robbed during a bus trip through India, ended up with a young jaguar in the backseat

of their rental car in the Brazilian Pantanal wetlands, and had many other adventures that most people would find harrowing, Maines said there are no bad experiences, only life lessons.

“We are all great creators, and each one of us is totally in charge of our lives,” said Maines.“By changing our perception of the world, we can draw to ourselves new and exciting experiences that will give us a more fulfilling and joyful life.”

Maines also passed on some advice he heard years ago from a Boy Scout leader.“He said if you want to stay young all your life, hang around young people. I bought that hook, line and sinker.

Of course, I haven’t had to leave home for the last 45 years to do it,” quipped Maines, whose sons’ ages range over decades.“Now,

Villagers in Mali, West Africa pound millet three times: the first pound removes the husk and the product is called cous; the second pound is finer and is cous cous; and the third pound is the finest of all, called cous cous cous.

27 • MAINE SENIORS

PRIME MOVER • Steve Maines

It’s no accident that Maines is somehow able to bring out so much of the nature of a people or places in his photography. He is a spiritual seeker. being with the kids at school, I come home more energized than when I went!”

The author is hoping that his book, available on Amazon, will “take off and become a big seller. I want the majority of the profits to go to organizations that already have something set up for helping the children of the world that are suffering, that are starving, that are in war zones,” Maines said. “That’s where my heart is; that’s where I want to donate the money. I don’t really need it now.”

MSM Maines became an author for the first time at age 74.

JANUARY 2019 • 2 8

introducing new approaches

to

think about aging

BY DR. LEN KAYE

I thought I would use this issue of Sage Lens to inform readers of some interesting new approaches to aging that emphasize positive, optimistic, and hopeful perspectives on growing older in today’s world.

A

ll three approaches to aging highlighted below emphasize the value of a productive aging approach to thinking about growing older. They all emphasize the positive aspects of growing older and how older adults can continue to make important contributions to their own lives, the organizations in which they work and volunteer, the communities in which they live, and society as a whole. A productive aging perspective recognizes that the benefits that accrue to growing older are not only economically defined but are also measured in terms of one’s social or civic contributions.

Increasingly, research documents that a productive lifestyle that includes an active and engaged mentality, is central to healthy aging, happiness, increased functional capacity, and, ultimately, a longer life.

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Increasingly, research documents that a productive lifestyle that includes an active and engaged mentality is central to healthy aging.

First, let me remind those readers who did not read the Sage Lens column in the last issue of MSM, that there is a lively movement afoot to reframe the way we talk about aging. The main point is that the way we talk about aging and growing old can be very influential in how those to whom we are speaking (and we, ourselves!) form impressions about old people and the experience of old age. All too often we use overly negative terms which can result in misinterpretations and misunderstandings by those to whom we are speaking. Those misunderstandings can lead to unproductive and negative personal beliefs that can promote stereotypic and distorted views of what it means to be old. One way we can all fight ageism and the negative perception of old age is to be more intentional in how we describe older people by avoiding the use of negative and pessimistic terms.

Want to learn more about reframing aging?  Read last month’s Sage Lens column and visit www. asaging.org/reframing-aging.

There is a second movement afoot to disrupt aging. The premise of this movement is that what you do after 50 can be just as amazing as what you did before 30 and that it is time to disrupt the aging experience. This movement is about not only “owning” your age but celebrating it and also reinventing what it means to age and disrupting the process by thinking differently about education, work, and retirement. It is about raising your expectations in later life and demanding what you want.

Disrupting aging also means thinking about designing your life differently, if you so choose, given how long you can expect to live including taking advantage of more opportunities and choice that will be available to you. It is all about taking control of how you want to live and age.

Want to learn more about disrupting aging? Visit www.aarp.org/disrupt-aging.

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And now on to the movement that emphasizes your encore career. With the tag line“second acts for the greater good”, encore. org believes it is time for change in our culture, institutions, and leadership such that the decades of life beyond 50 become a time of social contribution and impact so we are able to leave the world better than we found it. The encore movement is all about changing the cultural attitudes of people through innovation, thought leadership, and research. It is about helping organizations develop new ways to engage older adults in their encore careers to solve social problems. And, it is about building a network of encore champions, innovators, and organizations in communities across the United States and the world. The result will be people 50+ easily trained for seeking and finding encore roles; the social sector actively recruiting older adults because of their encore talent; and people 50+ helping to solve some of our biggest social problems.

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MSM

Happy Valentine’s Day from all of us at For the prime of your life 31 • MAINE SENIORS

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JANUARY 2019 • 3 2

Gadgets, Gizmos, & Gimmicks

BY WALDO CLARK

My sources tell me about a credible consumer conspiracy, a manipulative psychological strategy to entice our addicted “I must have it” minds.

“SPARKLING, FRESH AND LIVELY.”

Y

ou see, we’re a nation of Gadget Geeks. Our desire to purchase the latest and best products mashes our fogbound brains. An old philosopher said, “Man’s desire overshadows his needs.” To make it worse, we buy the same products; we’re cookie cutters who relinquish all semblance of originality and individuality, the pioneer spirit to head west and discover new horizons faded into times past.

- Los Angeles Times

We read the same bestsellers, gloat over our granite counter tops and stainless-steel appliances, and chase the newest release of the iPhone.

Ads attack us like annoyed bees buzzing, relentless, stinging us senseless: “Buy this now, best-selling, tech products everyone should own; Things you should buy, everyone has one—it’s popular; The ten best products.” There’s even a website called Trend Hunter where you can join the “in” crowd.

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Imagine a wise old Mainer rocking away, shaking his head, and grinning over these numb nuts, wondering what all the ballyhoo’s about, this pursuit of doo-dads and whatchamacallits, such as: in vogue fanny packs (worn by the beautiful people), designer hand bags, a famous athlete’s sneakers, purple yoga pants, and fitness watches. Get the point?

Pump the brakes, Betty. Take your finger off the Buy Button, Bert.

Gizmo Geeks buy and buy, upgrade and upgrade. Their homes resemble museums, their new items on full display, destined for the flea market a year later.

Milton Berle said,“I was in a department store and I saw a weirdlooking gadget. I asked the young sales lady what it was. She answered,‘It doesn’t do anything. It’s just a Christmas gift.’”

We love our gadgets even if

we need CliffsNotes to help us use them, sometimes unsure if they’re even on, unless the green light shines.

We love our gadgets even if we need CliffsNotes to help us use them, sometimes unsure if they’re even on, unless the green light shines. Amazon has a list of products called “Movers and Shakers,” a phrase usually associated with a newspaper’s business section. Their number 1, the Porta Potty. The ad says, “… which will help you have the best (there’s that word again) poop of your life.” Geez, after all these years, we’re told we need to adjust our position, like a bombardier adjusting his trusted bomb site.

A fashion trend follower myself, this one attracted me—a small security camera that fits on a shelf. Good idea. The camera can capture a burglar stealing all that stuff you’ve bought.

Red Skeleton said, “She has an electric blender, electric toaster, and an electric bread maker. She said, ‘There are too many gadgets and no place to sit down.’ So, I bought her an electric chair.”

Most Mainers got this consumer conspiracy thing figured out.

They buy bread, milk, eggs, bacon, and blueberry pie. Then, they head to camp with all its reliable gadgets: push lawn mower, hammock, grill, bottle opener, bicycle pump, sledgehammer, feather duster, and bug spray. No Porta Potty, just a threehole outhouse with Charmin Ultra Soft toilet tissue. Ah, the simplicity of it all.

Ya know, when I head to camp, I take two trusted friends along, my walking stick and my all-purpose Swiss Army Knife.

Local folks consider me a cutting-edge fella. Yes suh.

MSM

JANUARY 2019 • 3 4

Angels

Among Us

BY JANE MARGESSON Tom O’Connor at the State House during a news conference held in November, 2018 – the first designation of Maine Family Caregivers Month.

When I was a caregiver for my mother-in-law (also named Jane!), I was surprised how difficult it was to find home care assistance, especially as Jane’s needs became more complicated.

W

e called several agencies, but they were either booked solid, too expensive or didn’t serve our particular area. It was very frustrating and demoralizing. As any caregiver knows, the needs of one’s aging loved one only increase over time.

One thing I learned during my caregiving journey was how important it is to ask for help and to keep asking.

Caregiving can be a very uplifting experience, but it is also extremely tiring. I finally asked the right person – a colleague in a neighboring state – who was providing care in her own home for her mother who had Alzheimer’s Disease.“Why don’t you see if you can find a nursing student to help?” she offered.

“That’s what I’m doing.” On went the light bulb! I had never thought of this option, but it made perfect sense. Someone eager to learn who wanted hands-on experience would be a terrific addition to our home care team.

I immediately contacted the nursing school at UNE and within a week, I had a terrific candidate. She came for an interview at our house and she and Jane bonded right away. From then on, 35 • MAINE SENIORS

Maddie and Deb are all smiles during one of their visits!

for several blissful hours a week, she took care of Jane while my partner and I took much-needed breaks. We gardened. We went for drives. We went shopping! Having her help was invaluable to all of us.

Our difficulty in finding home care assistance is all too common.

In fact, Maine’s critical shortage of available home care personnel was included as a key element of the Maine Caregiver Resolution which passed the state legislature unanimously last year. The Resolution asks lawmakers to review state policies and programs for their effectiveness in addressing the needs of family caregivers

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“Caregivers need support so they can do the best job possible for their loved ones."

and their loved ones. If you are a caregiver, you might consider contacting your legislators about these concerns. You can also call 776-6303 or send an email to me@aarp.org for a free Maine Caregiver Resource Guide.

Happy Presidents Day

I recently had the pleasure of meeting and working with Tom O’Connor, a caregiver from Portland whose wife, Deb, has Alzheimer’s. Tom described to me how Deb slipped further away as the disease took hold. “Deb’s condition continued to worsen,” he told me. “Besides greater personal needs, safety issues began to develop and I had no choice but to place her in an assisted living facility.” Some of us might assume that this move to a facility meant a lessening of Tom’s caregiving role, but he didn’t see it that way.“It is still my job, particularly to be her advocate.”

"If the freedom of speech is taken away then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter."

—George Washington

Deb’s transition to the facility was not easy for either of them.

Tom said there were many days he couldn’t stop crying. After decades of marriage, the emptiness in their house was almost unbearable. Deb herself seemed aware of the change and she withdrew even more and stopped smiling altogether. Tom knew he had to do something and with the help of the Alzheimer’s Association, he made a connection to the same nursing school at UNE. Enter Maddie French. Maddie visits Deb several times a week. With this arrangement, Tom knows that Deb is receiving loving, personal attention, and you have only to look at the photo of Maddie and Deb smiling to see the positive impact of their time together!

"America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves."

—Abe Lincoln

Tom has become an advocate not just for Deb, but for caregivers across Maine. He knows first-hand how hard the state will need to work to improve home and community-based care and resources so that Mainers can age in place. “Caregivers need support so they can do the best job possible for their loved ones,” he says. I couldn’t agree more.

MSM

"My reading of history convinces me that most bad government results from too much government."

—Thomas Jefferson

"True individual freedom cannot exist without economic security and independence. People who are hungry and out of a job are the stuff of which dictatorships are made."

—Franklin D. Roosevelt "Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction.

We didn't pass it to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same."

—Ronald Reagan

God bless America!

JANUARY 2019 • 3 6

SPECIAL

love poems:

A Valentine’s Story

BY WENDY C. KASTEN

Today is Valentine’s Day.

D

ad and I are standing at the end of Mom ‘s hospital bed, where she’s been coughing for her life with pneumonia. Her eyes brighten at the sight of Dad and me, but she can no longer say who we are. She nods off to sleep.

For each of the last 64 years, Dad has written Mom a love poem for Valentine’s Day and their anniversary. Suddenly it dawns on me that there are at least 128 poems. Love poems to my mother.

“Dad, where are all the poems you wrote for Mom?” He shrugs his shoulders.

“I gave them to her,” he says with resignation. Oh, my. Where on earth could they be?

By this time, Mom has been in a nursing home almost a year.

Since then, every day, Dad eats breakfast, then ambles slowly to his car to drive the 30 yards to her nursing home. He finds her wandering the halls in her walker. She smiles at the sight of him.

They sit together in one of the lounges holding hands until Mom is ushered to lunch. Dad heads back to his apartment, has lunch, and then drives back to the nursing home where he again sits with her until dinner. Every day is a carbon copy of this.

37 • MAINE SENIORS

SPECIAL

One evening, I go to Dad’s apartment to start searching for the poems. I knock, opening the door slowly. He’s lying on his couch, a crumpled Subway napkin in his hand, ballroom dancing music playing on his stereo. I know these tunes. They danced to them together. He gets up and faces me, his face stained with tears, smiling that I have arrived.

Dad has never lived alone. His housekeeping is dreadful. After I hug him, I step in the tiny kitchen where I collect used paper napkins, styrofoam cups, and plates that are encrusted with old food. I stuff them in the trash, amidst his admonitions of “Hey, those could be used again.” I ignore his rants and make my way to Mom’s dresser.

First, the drawers of her jewelry chest. I pull out the top one, set it on my lap with a large trash can poised nearby. Rusting hairpins have stained the pink velveteen lining. I find toothpicks, an occasional button, name tags from the “Sun and Fun” RV Resort Park in Sarasota, Florida, and a crochet hook. The best find is Dad’s U.S. Navy dog tags from the War. He’s pleased to see them.

JANUARY 2019 • 3 8

SPECIAL

Stashed in one corner of the bottom drawer I find four love poems, brittle, torn, and mended with yellowing tape. I stop and read them. One is titled “May it Never End.” I’ve said it very many times, In many ways throughout the years, Whether straight or set in rhymes, Whether in laughter or through tears.

It’s been at night and during days, So it may not sound very new, Still I do not know other ways, To once again say “I love you.”

On another evening, I find a few more in Mom’s top drawer, slipped among pairs of pantyhose, all with runs, and next to the now sticky prosthesis Mom was supposed to wear after her mastectomy.

“I’m over 70, what do I need two breasts for?” she’d declared. One poem has no date, maybe soon after the war.

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39 • MAINE SENIORS

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SPECIAL

I searched for her throughout the world wide, Crossing each continent from side to side.

Hoping that somewhere and someday I’d find, The special girl who’d be loving and kind.

Failing I gave up nevermore to roam To find my Valentine waiting at home.

Following Easter weekend, Dad and I decide to move Mom to a different nursing home where there might be a higher level of care. Amid her decline are mysterious moments of lucidness.

The day we are settling her into the new surroundings, she turns and looks at Dad as he’s leaving and says clearly, “You know, I have never stopped loving you.”

On another evening, I return to the nightstand and clear out the last of the garbage. A few dozen pens that don’t write. More hairpins, rollers, dirty tissues, safety pins, and a brochure. This time, I find only a single poem in a faded and stained pink cosmetic bag.

To Mary: My love is yours through good and bad It’s with you when you’re glad or sad.

A truer love will never be, As everyone can plainly see.

Our love has stood the test of time, For I am yours and you are mine.

—Henry Mom passed first in 2006. Dad was fragile with a heart barely pumping. He was in agony without her, especially when Valentine’s Day came around.

At home, when I took in the mail that afternoon, there was an envelope addressed to my mother in my father’s handwriting. I couldn’t make any sense of what this would be. After staring at it for a few minutes, I opened it. This was inside.

ON LEAVING You finally left this earth missing me, To me, you and I shall remain just we.

Dying is a part of living and life, Through all eternity you’re still my wife.

In all and everything I do each day, Our togetherness will forever stay.

Dad passed a few months later. I only ever found 29 poems.

His final request was that their ashes be mixed together and scattered in Vermont, where their married life had started anew after the war. The following summer, standing in a meadow of red and yellow wildflowers, my brother Tom and I fulfilled their wish. Tom read aloud that last poem.

Looking back on my folk’s life, I know what true love looks like.

MSM

JANUARY 2019 • 4 0

A TRAIL LESS TRAVELED

Unwelcome Winter Houseguests Sometimes extreme measures and strategy need to be employed when woodland creatures invade our homes.

BY BRAD EDEN

A

nyone who lives in Maine can expect to have wintertime visitors that stay too long. Those who live in older houses are particularly susceptible to transients taking up residence. And I’m not talking about the human kind.

We lived in an old farmhouse for 26 years before buying our current home. Back then, by the time I had battened down the hatches on the house for the winter a few mice would have sneaked in and would continue to do so. Small snap traps baited with peanut butter placed about the house and attic would take care of that problem. One winter we began to be awakened by something much larger than mice scrambling around above our bedroom ceiling. Upon investigation I found that something had chewed holes through the roof cornices on the outside of the house. By the size of those holes, I suspected that the pesky red squirrels that tormented the dogs from the pine trees out back had chosen my attic as their winter den.

41 • MAINE SENIORS

The American red squirrel can be found just about anywhere from backyard bird feeders to mixed coniferous and deciduous forests.

They are sometimes called pine squirrels or tree squirrels and have a rufous coloration; a mixture of gray and red, with creamy white around their eyes and on their underside and a twitchy reddish tail.

Significantly smaller than the eastern gray squirrel they make up

A TRAIL LESS TRAVELED

One winter we began to be awakened by something much larger than mice scrambling around above our bedroom ceiling. for their diminutive size with their devilish and raucous behavior.

Red squirrels are the bane of deer hunters. They are very territorial, and if they detect you stalking through the woods or trying to remain undetected in a tree stand, they will harass you unmercifully with a cacophony of chatters and screeches and barks. They seem to know you won’t waste a bullet on them and will crouch on a limb, just out of reach, or peek at you while clinging upside down on the tree trunk and give you a prolonged and furious scolding. If you blink they will dash about spitting and stamping their feet in fury. In the meantime, some form of squirrel social networking will have commenced with other distant red squirrels broadcasting your presence to each other and all creatures, including the deer you have been patiently waiting for. Yet, I will admit, once they become bored with accosting you, watching their frenzied gymnastics can be an amusing distraction to the numbing boredom that stand hunting can produce.

I devised a new plan of attack. I knew that the squirrels were leaving their attic den during daylight hours to gather and enlarge their winter larder. Sure enough, after some stealthy surveillance it was revealed that they would emerge from the hole in the roof cornice and hop onto the front porch roof, then leap into the maple tree in front, and on to the ground to go about foraging. Our proximity to neighbors and a busy road explains why I didn’t employ firepower to exterminate these little demons.

Instead, I strategically set the live trap outside along their foodgathering route. Bingo. Within days I had caught over a halfdozen red squirrels. Once caught and defenseless, even the most marauding corn eating, chicken killing coon gets a pass from me.

These pesky freeloaders were no exception and were all released miles away. We finally started getting some sleep.

We have our fair share of red squirrels at our new place but it’s a newer more secure structure so we haven’t had any intrusions.

If that were to change and if these precocious little fiends were to start any trouble, removal efforts would commence, including my live trap efforts. But I would make sure not to let them go anywhere near my deer stands.

MSM

By the time I had figured out what was living in our attic, my wife, who is a notoriously light sleeper to begin with, was threatening to move to a motel until I solved the infestation problem. Unlike the dim-witted mice that couldn’t resist the baited snap traps, these furry invaders proved to be savvier adversaries. I tried leaving a light on in the attic to drive them out. Didn’t faze them.

I left a radio turned on up there. They simply danced longer and more loudly into the early morning hours.

Finally, I bought a squirrel size live trap. Problem solved I thought.

I baited the trap with a hand-selected variety of seeds and fruits, the goodies red squirrels prefer. I placed the trap in the attic with a smug grin on my face and waited. That grin soon turned upside down when the nighttime rough housing above our heads continued. They simply ignored the trap filled with the banquet I had provided. My wife was now sleeping downstairs on the couch, leaving me snuggling with two Springer spaniels who spent most nights staring at the ceiling and growling.

JANUARY 2019 • 4 2

HERE, THERE & EVERYWHERE

Quick Trip to Florida

BY SHELAGH TALBOT

Have you ever wanted to get “Out of

Dodge” for a few days? Especially when it’s turning cold and dark and wintery in Maine?

M

y friend Fran requested I accompany her in traveling down south for the winter (pulling her travel trailer). I thought it would be a great idea.

She was an avid horsewoman, and the place we were going, near Ocala, was filled with lots of horsey people, the perfect spot to winter over. There were lush fenced pastures and an open barn waiting for her horse, which would be arriving by trailer a few days after we got there—it would be “easy-peasy”. Little did I know– everything that could go wrong did.

The morning we were supposed to leave—around 9 a.m.—we discovered that the trailer hitch needed an extra pin to lock everything in place—and all the trailer tires were slack. Oh well… no big deal, except it took us half the day to find the pin and a few hours to get the tires all pumped up. By the time we hit the road, it was 4:30 p.m., which made us just in time for rush hour traffic—especially around Boston. We crawled along

43 • MAINE SENIORS

HERE,A THERE TRAIL&LESS EVERYWHERE TRAVELED

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Poor Fran! She was covered with scratches from the cat and the brambles, and there were deep bites on her arms, hands and fingers. But, stoic gal that she is, she sloughed it off and continued driving. When we got to Pennsylvania, she appeared somewhat delirious—I felt her forehead—and discovered she was burning!

So, we found an Urgent Care and after an hour or so, she was bandaged up and put on a regimen of antibiotics. Her hands were swollen like balloons. We ended up staying somewhere in Virginia for the night—another Walmart parking lot. We had to be VERY careful about NOT letting any cats escape again.

The next day she was feeling a little better and said she could drive for at least 12 hours, which would get us all the way to Florida. Unfortunately, as we pulled out of the parking lot, her trailer nicked the mirror of a parked tractor-trailer. We heard the bump but didn’t think there was any damage. WRONG! Next thing we know there’s a big old semi barreling down the road

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for hours and finally settled down in a Walmart parking lot in Charlton, Massachusetts. We were too tired to eat much that night and decided we would treat ourselves to McDonald’s the next morning. Oh, we weren’t alone in the trailer—her four cats accompanied us.

The next day, we got up early and went to Mickey D’s for a breakfast sandwich. When Fran climbed in the trailer to get something, one of the cats escaped into a briar patch next to McDonald’s. Fran immediately plunged into the briars after her kitty—which was yowling from the bushes. I suggested she use my sandwich as bait and tossed it to her. My aim was bad—the sandwich landed on the ground but the cat was sufficiently interested to investigate. That’s when Fran made a lunge for the feline—who turned and started running away again. Unfortunately, she grabbed it by the tail, the only place she could reach. And, if you know anything about cats, that’s the WRONG place to grab! That cat immediately turned on her, biting and scratching her hands and arms in a fury. Despite

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HERE, THERE & EVERYWHERE

after us. The driver pulled along side and honked his air horn, making gestures that we were to pull over. At first we thought he was playing road tag and Fran didn’t stop, but after the third time of his pulling alongside and gesturing, we figured something was wrong. We stopped on the side of the highway and he tucked in behind us. Minutes later he was telling my friend what she had done and threatening to call the police and the insurance company. We asked if there was another way to settle this, and he said,“Sure, a hundred- dollar bill would work.” Sheepishly we dug in our purses and found the money. He was satisfied, but he cautioned Fran to “Watch your rear end!” The rear of the trailer, that is.

The rest of the trip was without incident and we arrived at the place where she would park her trailer for the winter. We were so exhausted that again, no supper, we went straight to bed—me on the couch and she in her bed. The next morning we worked at getting the trailer set up and level. Fran’s hands were a little better but she complained of pain in her knuckle where the cat

45 • MAINE SENIORS

had chomped down hard. I would not have been surprised to discover it was a broken knuckle. Later that day, much to the delight of all four felines, she let them out to explore their winter home and we had cocktails and sandwiches outside.

The horse arrived the following day and wouldn’t you know—it had a fever from the trip. So, Fran rushed to town for supplies and made up a batch of electrolytes, Tums and applesauce to help bring the fever down. Thankfully it worked and her horse was better in a few days. But, there were frequent temperature checks and that was not done in the horse’s mouth if you get my drift!

Finally, on the last day of my visit a nice neighbor showed us around. It was beautiful countryside with tidy farms and a vast state forest known for its riding trails. We even got to have lunch in town at a friendly southern restaurant— complete with the requisite fried green tomatoes. Early the next morning I was on a plane to Portland, followed by a drive to Greenville—a trip that was blessedly uneventful.

MSM

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JANUARY 2019 • 4 6

BUCKET LIST

a bend in the road

BY LARRY GRARD

There’s a bend down the road for me, if

and when I have the wherewithal to take it.

S

outh Bend, to be more precise, is at the top of my bucket list. The cultural hub of northern Indiana, South Bend is known nationwide almost exclusively as the home of the Notre Dame Fighting Irish, the most storied college football program in the land. And the so-called “Touchdown Jesus,” the mural on the Hesburgh Library, known as such because of the raised position of Christ’s arms and its location directly behind the north end zone of the football stadium, oversees it all.

Notre Dame’s football pedigree is unquestioned. Legendary Coach Knute Rockne made the Irish a national football standard in the 1920s and ‘30s. Ronald Reagan played George Gipp in the 1940 movie “Knute Rockne, All American.” The film included Rockne’s legendary speech entitled“Win One Just for the Gipper.” Gipp was selected as Notre Dame's first Walter 47 • MAINE SENIORS

Camp All-American, and played several positions, including halfback, quarterback and punter. Gipp died prematurely at age 25 of a streptococcal throat infection and pneumonia three weeks after a win over Northwestern in his senior season.

Today, Notre Dame is the only college football team in the country to have every one of its games carried on national television. Yeah, I’d like to be there.

This is not to downplay college football experiences I have under my belt. I’ve been to many University of Maine homecoming games, to cheer on the Black Bears. “The Maine Stein Song,” which shot to national fame when Rudy Vallee sang it in 1930, is the greatest college fight song in the country (with apologies to Notre Dame and Michigan). This is football far from the level of the Notre Dame’s and the Michigan’s, but I still get goose bumps when I stand for the Maine Stein Song.

I have been to one game at Boston College, located in Boston’s exclusive Chestnut Hill section. A crowd of maybe 35,000.

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Notre Dame’s football pedigree is unquestioned. Legendary Coach Knute Rockne made the Irish a national football standard in the 1920s and ‘30s.

Then came the big one. A college friend of mine and avid USC fan offered all expenses to attend a game at the iconic Los Angeles Coliseum, built in 1923 for the 1932 Olympics. I sat in a virtual sea of people and cheered the Trojans on in the victory over Washington. What a thrill – for those with my inclinations – to see the USC Trojan ride the white horse “Traveler” prior to the game. Yeah, I’m like that.

So that’s it for my college football experience.

I’d love to attend some games in the Southern football hot spots such as LSU, Georgia, Texas and Oklahoma. But Notre Dame is the plum.

A close, non-football related bucket list item: The Kentucky Derby. Tradition, tradition, tradition.

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A LOOK BACK

Winter

Fun

BY CLYDE TARR

One needs a certain rigorous disposition to survive these rugged Maine winters, what with the snow, the ice, the wind, and the cold.

E

dging ever further into my senior years, I am fearful of a fall, and a possible fracture, requiring surgery and an extended rehabilitation, perhaps in a skilled nursing facility. As a child, though, I paid no heed to these elements, and like all children, threw caution to the wind when playing outside in the snow. We were oblivious to the dangers, whatever they might have been. We played outdoors until called in for supper by our mothers, after dark in those early-sunset days.

Yes, we dressed for it, with long-johns and woolen mittens and hats drawn down over our ears, and we were active, warming our bodies with the calories we burned. We rolled down the hills, built snowmen, and snow forts, and snow caves. We had snowball fights, wars that emulated the behavior of adults on a 49 • MAINE SENIORS

small scale. We kept ourselves hydrated by eating snow (as long as it wasn’t yellow) we picked up by the handful. We didn’t worry about wood for the furnace, the water pipes freezing, cars that needed snow tires, driving to work in adverse conditions, or any of the other adult concerns. We were kids.

When my own children were young, I would haul the snowblower in the back of my pickup to nearby Sparky’s Pond (that’s what we called it, named after our dalmation) at the foot of Bald Mountain in Dedham (the ski area there had closed a few years earlier) and clear a course for us all to skate. We’d spend a Sunday afternoon going‘round and‘round, and I’d have a small fire going nearby to heat up the cocoa and burn the hot dogs.

Ice skating was really popular in Biddeford when I grew up, as it was, and still is, all over the state. In my home town were at least two outdoor rinks, one at St. Louis Field, and another in a little dip in the topography off Pool Street, called West Brook Skating Rink. There, speed skating was king. There might be a few figure skaters in the middle of the ice, and possibly an even

d e

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A LOOK BACK

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Interestingly, though, outside of the two or three cities in Maine, I knew of no other communities where this type of skating was favored. And today, it seems to have fizzled out altogether. Only one rink that I am aware of, in Falmouth, supports speed skating now. Many of the smaller indoor rinks actually prohibit it. It appears that for the most part the sport has been left to the Olympians.

These days, I watch all the outdoor winter sports from the comfort of my cozy living room, on my cozy couch, venturing out for a forced march in the cold simply so I can say I did it, or shooting hoops with the other old guys at the local YMCA, where it’s warm. The skiing, the skating, the snowball wars, are all things of the past, warm memories of a cold season.

Thanks to Bob Desrochers for sharing his memories.

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207-623-1411 smaller number of kids wearing hockey skates, but the main attraction was at the periphery of the ice, where the fast skaters reigned supreme. It usually began with one skater, crouched low to minimize wind resistance, powerfully pushing his legs, with the long-bladed skates giving him momentum. Another would fall in behind him, then another, until there was a line of them, seemingly effortlessly cruising at high speeds around the rink, counter-clockwise as always. Now and then a skater would pass another, and periodically one would drop out, to be replaced by yet another. But on it went, hours at a time.

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Speed skating was so popular there was a competitive club, the Maine Bladesmen, who travelled to other rinks, in Lewiston, Westbrook, and even out of state, to New Hampshire, Massachusetts, and New York, to race. There were divisions for different age groups and for boys and girls (this was before coed sports). Standings were kept and champions crowned. When a race was held at the West Brook rink, cars lined Pool Street, and people crowded the hillside overlooking the ice to watch.

JANUARY 2019 • 5 0

National Celebrate Month

Chocolate

BY ELLEN L. SPOONER

Let the celebration begin!

Americans love to celebrate. For this reason, we designate specific days, weeks, or even entire months as days to celebrate an infinite variety of people, events, or items.

S

ome of these are more than worthy of recognition, Independence Day, for example. Others, however, are questionable—National Flip Flop Day, June 17. Please!

In addition, there seems to be no equity as to the amount of time allotted for each celebration. Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Veterans Day, but National Peanut Month! Nevertheless, we continue to acknowledge and celebrate ad infinitum.

So what’s next? The holidays are over and, here in Maine, we are facing January and February—perhaps our darkest, coldest, snowiest months—with nothing to look forward to but March.

What do we have to celebrate? Hmm, let’s see. January is National Hot Tea Month and National Oatmeal Month. Not very exciting but definitely warm, soothing comfort foods. Moving on to February . . . National Celebrate Chocolate Month!

51 • MAINE SENIORS

Chocolate in one form or another has been with us for over 3000 years. Although accounts differ, the cacao tree, from which chocolate is derived, grew wild in the uninhabited Amazon region of South America but finally spread to Mexico and was discovered by the the indigenous peoples there. Believing that the beans contained in the fruit of the cacao tree were a gift from the gods, the indigenous peoples truly prized their discovery and used cacao beans as currency. They also fermented the beans into a bitter drink. And, thus, they would remain for centuries— currency and beverage—until Spanish explorers returned home from their voyages carrying this precious cargo.

During the 16th and 17th centuries, chocolate, having been embraced throughout Europe and America, was refined into most of its present forms and became an economic and culinary staple frequently used in both sweet and savory dishes. And, while its health benefits, or lack thereof, have become the topic of many discussions and studies, who among us does not delight in the thought of a chocolate something?

Featured Recipes COCOA DROP COOKIES INGREDIENTS:          

1/2 c. softened butter 1 c. white sugar 1 egg 3/4 c. sour milk (add 1 tsp. vinegar to whole milk) 1 tsp. vanilla 1 3/4 c. flour 1/2 tsp. baking soda 1/2 tsp. salt 1/2 c. cocoa 1 cup of chocolate bits, raisins or chopped nuts (optional)

DIRECTIONS: 1. Cream the butter, sugar, and egg in a bowl.

2. Stir in the sour milk and vanilla, mixing until fully incorporated.

3. Add the flour, baking soda, salt, and cocoa. Mix until the batter is smooth.

4. Get creative! Stir in chocolate bits, raisins, chopped nuts, or whatever strikes your fancy!

5. Chill mixture for at least one hour. Drop by rounded teaspoonfuls on lightly greased baking sheet, and bake at 400 degrees for 8-10 minutes. Do not overbake, cookies will firm as they cool. Frost or glaze.

Yield: 3-3 1/2 dozen.

6. Enjoy! But remember . . . everything in moderation—even chocolate.

Here are a few interesting facts to think about: 1. Gifford's Chocolate Ice Cream, made in Skowhegan, Maine, was chosen as the overall champion at the World Dairy Expo in 2007, 2009, 2010, and 2011.

2. Chocolate tops the list of best selling candy bars—M&Ms in first place followed by Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, Snickers, Hershey Bar, and Milky Way, not necessarily in that order.

3. Hershey’s Kisses are produced at a rate of 20-25 million per day.

4. Chocolate syrup was used to give the appearance of blood in the infamous shower scene in Alfred Hitchcock’s movie“Psycho”.

5. During the Persian Gulf War, Hershey made a special chocolate bar that resisted melting when exposed to extremely high temperatures so that Hershey Bars could continue to be included in a soldier's rations—as they had been since World War II. Everyday can be February 14—why not prepare a simple but tasty treat for your special Valentine?

MSM

JANUARY 2019 • 5 2

FROM THE PORCH

A Way to Travel

BY HUNTER HOWE

History teaches us that the human

condition persists in the great pursuit.

I

n Medieval Literature, King Arthur’s knights assembled in the quest for the Holy Grail. Spanish explorer Ponce de Leon sought the mythical Fountain of Youth. Many modern seekers pursue material wealth. To what end?

The ultimate pursuit, however, is the elusive search for happiness.

How often do we hear the lament, “I just want to be happy.” In Katherine Mansfield’s short story, “Her First Ball,” young Leila attends her first dance and ponders,“Why didn’t happiness last forever?”

We question, although happiness is a worthy goal, is it attainable for long periods of time? We attempt to find the right route living with the ebbs and flows of life. It’s hard, this craving for happiness.

Author Nina George writes, “Like life. It comes, and when its time is up, it goes. Like happiness. Everything has its own time.”

I’m reminded of the old debate, what’s more important, the journey or the destination? And another like debate, what’s more 53 • MAINE SENIORS

Winter Thoughts “A snowflake is one of God's most fragile creations, but look what they can do when they stick together!”

—Author Unknown “Snowstorms are God's way of saying 'You've beenworking too hard.'"

—Bern Williams “In the coldest February, as in every other month in every other year, the best thing to hold on to in this world is each other.”

—Linda Ellerbee, Move On: Adventures in the Real World

FROM THE PORCH

As Maine Seniors, we’re active, out and

they occur. Naysayers say, satisfying? I want more than that. But satisfying doesn’t mean complacency, far from it.

about, making connections, taking classes, and utilizing our interests and skills to instruct, volunteer, and teach.

A therapist, in an article in Psychology Today, wrote, “I tell my clients we’ll work toward contentment. When you’re satisfied with the life you’ve built-to-date and when you are healthy (of mind), we’ll go for happiness.”

important, contentment or happiness? More so, is journey to contentment like destination is to happiness?

Let’s take this up a notch. As Maine Seniors, we’re active, out and about, making connections, taking classes, and utilizing our interests and skills to instruct, volunteer, and teach. We desire a life of fulfillment; happiness, the frosting on the cake.

The quest for happiness is fraught with frustration. The problem, happiness, like having too many drinks or taking too many drugs, acts like a temporary high. We need more.

Pearl Buck said, “Many people lose the small joys in the hope for the big happiness. You see, the pursuit of happiness may be emotionally draining, the constant seeking, always seeking.”

Perhaps the journey’s the preferred way of traveling through life, learning to embrace contentment and living a satisfying and fulfilling life, enjoying those special moments of happiness, when

As I age, I explore the boundaries of uncharted senior territory.

To survive, I understand the importance of movement, of engaging and interacting with other people. But, as I maneuver around in this territory, I also seek mental respite found in the hush of contentment, in my inner self, that sanctuary of quiet stillness and peace, embracing an attitude of gratitude. Like a salve, it soothes me.

Author Elizabeth Gilbert wrote,“At some point you gotta let go,

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FROM THE PORCH

and sit still, and allow contentment to come to you. Like a weary traveler, sitting at a table outside a Parisian café, I’m content to listen and watch. When I’m ready, I’ll move on.”

Yet, this refuge troubles me as well. I ask myself, is this a form of too much “senior relaxing.”I’m aware of letting go, of not overanalyzing the past or looking too far in the future, realizing the horizon looms, a short distance away. I’ve decided that I won’t let this contentment consume me, a place I never leave, a permanent dwelling, a fortress to escape from life’s difficulties. Rather, I’d like to believe that contentment is a foundation for living my life.

I’ve decided to live satisfied in contentment, with its joys, with its ups and downs, appreciating the journey, when I can. I won’t feel guilty over my new-found peace. An American proverb says, “A harvest of peace is produced from a sense of contentment.”

A HuffPost article,“5 Essentials to Achieving Something More Than Happiness,” mentions the Declaration of Independence and the famous words,“Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.”

The piece continues,“Perhaps a more meaningful and achievable goal is,‘Life, liberty, and contentment.’”

To illustrate: In a mid-coast Maine village, a tired tourist trudges down a steep gravelly road to a worn-planked wharf that juts out into a deep, narrow inlet. A weathered fisherman, his black boots rolled down, with age lines etched in his facial creases, sits on a paint-spattered stool mending a net. They exchange pleasantries.

Tourist: “You seem happy.”

Fisherman: “Happy? Hmm … Nope, I’ve tried to get there … toughplace to find, fleeting …

Tourist: “I … don’t follow?”

Fisherman: “See that guy over there, Simmie, wash’in his boat down.”

Tourist: “Big boat.”

Fisherman: “Ayah. Won the lottery while back, he did. $550,000.

Bought a new boat.”

Tourist: “Must be real happy.”

Fisherman: “Was happy, but he’s always chasing a bigger boat— that’s the fifth one he’s bought.”

Tourist: “So he’s not happy?”

Fisherman: “Depends. He is, he’s not, he is, he’s not—constantly in pursuit.”

Tourist: “And you? “

55 • MAINE SENIORS

Fisherman: “Content with what I got, young fella. Been around long enough not to chase. Age and wisdom do that.”

Tourist: “You mean you won’t be moving to one of the two happiest countries—Norway and Denmark?”

Fisherman: “Like it right here in Maine. Ayah, contentment’s my wealth.” He looked up at the tourist, smiled, and said, “English novelist Henry Fielding wrote, ‘I am content; that is a blessing far greater than riches; and he to whom that is given need ask no more.’”

I suppose, like the fisherman, we address the pursuit of happiness, in our own way.

As I lay my head on my pillow, darkness all around, looking forward to the dawn light and to the joy of the journey, I think about traveling hopefully and happily, in contentment.

MSM

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