Sydney MamaMag Aug/Sep 2021 by MamaMag

SYDNEY

mamamAg Aug/Sep 2021

“I once heard a quote ‘A hungry man is an angry one’… Let me tell you, this also strongly applies to babies (and breastfeeding mothers I might add).” @tarapavlovic

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Breaking breastfeeding barriers Let’s talk about sex Why we love spooning Every night of the week

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THE FIGHT CONTINUES Who would have thought we would be back here again? Sydney in a massive lockdown, Melbourne fresh out of lockdown number five, even Qld just slipped back into lockdown leaving ump-teen WAGs still stuck in their 14-day quarantine while their football husbands flee the state! This pesky pandemic sure knows how to pack a punch. I rushed out for my first Pfizer just days after they opened up to 40+ and I’m fully jabbed now, doing my bit for the country. Speaking of Pfizer (or should I say ‘Pfiiiiiiizer’), how funny is Jimmy Rees? We chatted with Jimmy about surviving lockdown and his latest creative outlet, tiktok videos. I had to giggle about the fact I’ve had the ‘Pfiiiizer’ and I live in ‘Briiiiighton’! If you haven’t seen his videos, jump over to any of his social channels. Whilst thankfully we are still managing to bring you MamaMag, in both print and digital, our hearts are really going out to all the businesses that are forced to close. So many of our beautiful clients we’ve grown to love over MamaMag’s seven years are impacted. But some light in all the business doom and gloom. I found out yesterday I’ve made it through as a finalist in the 2021 AusMumpreneur Awards. I’m pretty chuffed to be up amongst some of the best businesses in Australia but nervous for my judging later in August. Wish me luck! Sarah Cavalier Editor - MamaMagSupport - @thecavaliermama and fun for the everyday mum MamaMag is designed and published bi-monthly free for Sydney mums, families and carers. Publisher: Grizzle Design Pty Ltd. ABN: 26 042 138 550. PO Box 8018, North Road LPO, Brighton East VIC 3187 Phone: 1300 771 446 Email: info@mamamag.com.au www.mamamag.com.au | www.grizzledesign.com.au Editor in Chief/Creative Director: Sarah Cavalier: sarah@mamamag.com.au National Sales Director: Olivia Wilson: olivia@mamamag.com.au Want to write for us or have an article idea? submissions@mamamag.com.au

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Contents Jimmy still makes us giggle

Chatting to funny man Jimmy Rees

Breaking breastfeeding barriers

Tara Pavlovic joins the crusade

Sydney in a jigsaw

WIN 1 of 3 Vuly Balance Bikes

Some digital fun from City of Sydney

Why we love spooning

Time to ditch the baby food pouch

Childcare 14 A woman’s issue?

Talking about Covid-19

How to discuss with your kids

Let’s talk about sex

$149 each

Time to talk sex problems

Fabulous food

worth

Checking out some Aussie brands

I can do it

Helping kids take control

Every night of the week

Lucy Tweed’s new cookbook

Feeding teens well

Food tips for busy parents

Germ gems

Encouraging kids to wash their hands

Housebound fun

Fun ideas for preschoolers stuck at home

Winter eczema exit

Managing in the cooler months

On the shelf

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Helping stress and anxiety The opinions expressed herein are not necessarily those of the publishing staff. Reproduction in whole or part is prohibited without permission of the publishers. Health related articles are designed to be informative and educational. They are not intended to provide specific medical advice or replace one-on-one advice from your health practitioner. Some featured books contain affiliate links. If you purchase using these links there is no extra cost to you but MamaMag earn a small commission that helps us continue to provide MamaMag as a FREE resource to you.

MamaMag Aug/Sept 2021

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JIMMY STILL MAKES Whilst every parent knows him as Jimmy Giggle, after headlining this brilliant kids’ show for over 10 years, today Jimmy Rees is garnering a completely different audience. Everyday Aussies. Especially ones trying to decide between the ‘Pfiiiiiiiizer’ or the ‘AZ’! And people are certainly taking notice. He now has a combined following across Insta, Facebook and TikTok of 1.3 million people. When the pandemic hit and Jimmy’s post-TV event plans were cancelled, he turned to social media videos as a creative outlet. Jimmy has gone on to become one of the most-viewed Australian TikTok personalities, with 10 million likes on that platform alone, and video views across his social media channels in any given week outnumbering Australians watching television. His hilarious video parodies like ‘The guy who decides packaging’, ‘Meanwhile in Australia’ and the even funnier ‘Meanwhile in Brighton’, have kept Aussies laughing throughout lockdown, while his three young boys have inspired his spot-on impersonations of the outlandish things kids say and do. But he certainly hasn’t forgotten about entertaining kids and has just released his first children’s book; Bedtime Sorted!. Bedtime Sorted! riffs off one of Jimmy’s most popular parenting videos (over 2 million views) about the myriad bedtime excuses that families everywhere know all too well. ‘Parenting is hard, and making silly TikTok videos about its challenges is my own way of coping, so it’s just a bonus that other parents can have a laugh along with me. Bedtime Sorted! is an extension of that, cleverly disguised as a picture book for kids – but I hope that mums and dads will get a kick out of it too.’ We chat to Jimmy about his new book, surviving lockdown with three young boys, and just where his comic genius is going...

What was the inspiration for Bedtime Sorted!? I made a TikTok video about all the excuses I hear from my eldest son Lenny (he’s six) at bedtime, and the video was well-received by my audience online. There were plenty of funny comments about all the random things parents had heard over the years. That’s where it started, but in a general sense it’s about the funny moments and challenges you have as a parent raising kids. They are always throwing you curveballs and some of those just happen to be hilarious.

With Father’s Day approaching, what’s your favourite thing about being a dad? Seeing the world through my kids’ eyes and having an excuse to be a big kid myself. Being a parent is one of the world’s greatest experiences and challenges – one which my wife and I embrace, and we endeavour to give our kids the best upbringing we can.

How did you cope with three young kids during lockdown? Umm, it was a little crazy. We discovered quickly that we needed a routine in our day. We planned our day around the twins’ sleep, and around when we were going to go out and do our exercise. We would also plan some quiet time; time for me to get some work done; and, of course, there was some homeschooling in there too. It’s not easy! Let’s hope the term ‘lockdown’ is forgotten forever very soon.

Any tips or hard-earned lessons when it comes to bedtime with kids? Well, the book is based on my family and features Dad, who thinks he has it all sorted but then completely does not! So maybe I’m not the best for advice. If I had to give a tip though – and this goes for parenting in general too –

‘Do you know where my Teddy is?’

US GIGGLE

ING M AK

‘Bed.’

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don’t stress. We can get so wound up as parents about sleeping and eating and playtime – the list goes on. Take it week by week, and don’t sweat the little things because one day the kids will be gone, moved out of home, off to start their own life. It’s our job to nurture them to that point.

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Did you think you would get so much success with your social videos?

‘Bed.’

Not at all. I was astounded when I started posting my videos. The first couple reached a million people and I thought “Wow, I’m gonna keep doing this”, so while we were in lockdown last year I set myself a challenge to think of an idea and post it that same day. It’s just taken off from there.

What’s been your favourite video or series of videos to date? I think the ‘Guy who decides …’ videos are among the favourites – there are so many stupid things we humans do when you look at them from the perspective of a guy making decisions about it all. More recently, the ‘Meanwhile In Brighton’ series is so silly and fun to write and record.

Have you thought about a career in stand-up comedy? Yes I have. I’ve always been interested in comedy, and I watch a lot of stand-up. My dad is from Portsmouth in the UK and although he came to Australia in his teens, what stayed with him was his British sense of humour. We watched so many brilliant British comics and shows when I was younger. I think if I were to put on a show it would be a hybrid of stand-up and character-based comedy. w he re ow ‘D o yo u kn ?’ Te dd y is my

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RK.’ O D A.’ O T t ’ s ‘Bed

‘Bed.’

Have you had the Pfiiiiizer yet? Oh darling, if only I could get the Pfiiiiiiiiiizer!! I’m not a day over 34, darling!

‘ C A N Y O U L E AV E T H E D O O

O PE N ?’

‘Bed.’

WIN

Bedtime Sorted! by Jimmy Rees ’and O I S ES . NY N F U N is available now. Briony Stewart (Affirm Press) ING IS

‘Bed.’

BREAKING BREASTFEEDING In recent months a breastfeeding mother was asked to leave Pacific Fair Shopping Centre in Queensland after staff deemed it inappropriate. Pacific Fair Shopping Centre maintains the incident was a “misinterpretation”, and was apologetic and vowed to re-educate its staff on its policies, this behaviour still shows that society still has a long way to go to normalise breastfeeding and break these barriers. Together with Philips Avent, TV star and new mum, Tara Pavlovic is helping to drive change and normalise breastfeeding by sharing what some may say, is a controversial photo of herself nursing her 10-month old baby boy, Paddy. She’s doing this to support the 54% of breastfeeding mums that say they don’t feel comfortable breastfeeding in public and to hopefully encourage society to rethink why this important part of motherhood is still widely considered to be controversial. I once heard a quote, “A hungry man is an angry one”… Let me tell you, this also strongly applies to babies (and breastfeeding mothers I might add). I’ve always admired mums who have the courage to post unapologetic photos of themselves while nursing their babies as they share the realities of this important part of motherhood. Breastfeeding or pumping milk, our bodies do amazing things. Before becoming a mum, I never fully understood how the innocent act of breastfeeding in public could be considered so inappropriate by society. And now, as a first time mum, it blew my mind when I heard that 54% of breastfeeding mums don’t feel comfortable breastfeeding in public! This World Breast Feeding Week I’ve partnered with Philips Avent to help drive change and be part of a campaign that supports mothers and their breastfeeding journeys. I share this photo of Paddy so that we, along with all of the courageous mums before me, can be a part of the movement that helps to normalise breastfeeding.

With millions of Australian’s locked down due to COVID-19 restrictions, the Australian Breastfeeding Association (ABA) is calling for dads, partners and loved-ones to champion supporting the needs of mothers this World Breastfeeding Week (1 to 7 August 2021). For infants, mothers and the community at large to enjoy the health benefits associated with breastfeeding, including the immunity against respiratory illnesses via breastmilk, support from ‘the village’ is essential. Even prior to the pandemic, the support of dads and partners has consistently been shown to significantly improve breastfeeding duration and exclusivity rates. More than 60% of mothers seeking breastfeeding support from ABA reported being challenged, fearful or unable to access traditional face-to-face supports during Australia’s first outbreak of COVID-19. In response to this, 64% of mothers sought support to protect their infants by restarting breastfeeding, continuing breastfeeding or increasing milk supply. As the COVID-19 pandemic stretches into its 18th month, ABA is calling on expectant parents and, especially, dads and partners to build the foundations for a ‘virtual village’ ahead of their newest arrival. It’s as simple as booking yourself and your partner into an ABA breastfeeding education class (online or in person) and saving the Breastfeeding Helpline number into your phone. To book an online or in-person breastfeeding education class go to: www.breastfeeding.asn. au/breastfeeding-education-classes and for information about local World Breastfeeding Week events see here: www.breastfeeding.asn. au/calendar-of-member-events.

BARRIERS 54% of breastfeeding mums that say they don’t feel comfortable breastfeeding in public. Philips Avent

60% of mothers seeking reported being challenged, fearful or unable to access traditional face-to-face supports during COVID-19. Australian Breastfeeding Association

SYDNEY IN A JIGSAW Looking for something different to get you through your lockdown day? Take a trip through time with the City of Sydney archives snaps from 1916 to 2020 in jigsaw form. Warning, these highly addictive puzzles may dominate your weekends. Get your friends to join you in this jigsaw-a-thon. Piece together an iconic Sydney moment with eight gorgeous online jigsaw puzzles Click to try your luck at an online puzzle now.

Vintage images include: • Martin Place at night, 2000. • Queen Victoria Building during the Covid 19 pandemic, 2020. • Route 512 bus and cars in Hay St, Haymarket 1970. • Heavy traffic in both directions, Bayswater Road, Darlinghurst, 1960. • Trapeze artist at Museum of Contemporary Art, The Rocks, 1997. • Roadworks in front of Sydney Town Hall, Sydney, 1931. • Flower stands, Martin Place, Sydney, 1933. • House on the move, Brown Street and Missenden Road, Camperdown, 1916.

WHY WE LOVE SPOONING Our philosophy at Little Bellies is to ‘Do What’s Natural’. We believe nutrition is complex, but nurturing is natural, and so we focus on making simple, age-appropriate and wholesome foods for your babies, toddlers and kids – so that you can focus on what comes naturally to you – raising independent and unique individuals. We founded Little Bellies after one of our children was diagnosed with severe sensitivities to food. The safe snack options at the time were limited and many of the available options were what we considered to be “pseudo confectionery” – often filled with added sugars and unnecessary ingredients. We decided we needed to do something about this and as a result our range of safe and simple self-feeding snacks were born. Recently we have turned our attention to baby purées. It’s overwhelming to see so many purée pouches on the shelf today, and so we questioned why this has become the new ‘norm’.

Pouches certainly can assist with providing healthy, convenient and portable options for parents but sucking from a pouch that masks the food inside them is not a ‘natural’ way to eat. In fact, it has been linked to implications on natural child development. While pouches have a time and a place, we wanted to offer purées to help make feeding our kids feel natural. We know that eating purées out of a bowl, with a favourite spoon means true interaction between you and your baby and helps little ones see, touch and smell their food. This helps to develop a number of important sensory, oral and motor skills. Working alongside feeding specialist Simone Emery, we are passionate about sharing our love for spoon-feeding with parents.

Motor skills • Feeding is a developmental process, just like learning to crawl, walk or run. We believe pouches were made largely for convenience, rather than being the most-suitable option for a child’s motor skill development. We would always want to encourage a child to crawl, so let’s be sure we encourage important eating habits and skills in the same way and not do anything that could hinder that. • The mechanics of sucking something and swallowing it is completely different to having a spoon, placing food on the tongue from a spoon, moving it around the mouth, moving it to the back and swallowing it. It’s really important that children learn to do this from an early age. • Learning to swallow food that has been put in their mouth on a spoon helps a child develop their gag reflex and swallowing technique, both of which are essential to helping to transition on to solid foods.

Visual learning and interaction • Who doesn’t know the game ‘aeroplanes’?! Initially you’ll be feeding and teaching your little one how to eat with a spoon, but over time, they’ll want to start their journey to self-feeding and hold the spoon themselves. Being able to hold a spoon is a key component of motor skill development but it also enables your baby to play with their food. This is effective and serious research for babies! By playing with their purées and by trying to self-feed, as opposed to sucking from a pouch, babies are learning about textures, temperatures, colours, smells and tastes and developing a more relaxed association with their food. • Being able to see the food on a spoon and the different colours helps to develop positive associations with food.

Mindful mealtimes • Eating with a spoon helps to encourage mindful eating. The mindful motion of eating from a spoon gives little bodies time to signify fullness, and respects their natural ability to regulate their food intake. When a child is sucking directly from a pouch, the

food is directly deposited at the back of the mouth and swallowed. There is less natural pause to demonstrate the cues that they are full. Spoon feeding (and self-feeding finger foods) allow for a baby to consider when they are full and give appropriate feedback to carers. In addition, mindful eating really enables babies to enjoy the tastes and textures of their food. • Eating from a bowl with a spoon is more likely to ensure that meals and snacks become sit down occasions, as they should be.

Joyful connection • Eating from a bowl with a spoon means true interaction between you and your baby. It allows you to spend special time interacting and learning together, making eye contact and supporting the development of your baby’s motor and oral skill abilities.

Familiar rituals • We made a conscious decision not to supply a spoon with our bowls because we believe using a favourite spoon helps to create a familiar ritual. • Children from a young age need to experience a range of textures, flavours and foods in their diet. Building familiarity is the first step in helping them to accept a wider variety of foods in their diet. Babies become familiar with foods in their environment through the rituals and routines that we engage in. For example, visual cues to eat include bibs, spoons, highchairs, plates, cups, and the table. • As children become familiar with the food environment, they build eating skills too. So, we suggest using your baby’s favourite spoon with our range of Baby Bowls (even when out of home) to create familiar mealtime habits and rituals that can you can both enjoy together. At Little Bellies, we are passionate about providing healthy and delicious foods for babies, toddlers and kids. Feeding your kids can sometimes appear to be complex and overwhelming, but nurturing is natural! We do our very best to do what comes naturally to us. Find out more at bellies.com.au

CHILDCARE, A WOMEN’S ISSUE The recent federal budget announcements reinforce the societal belief that caring for children is a mother’s responsibility, and that by improving childcare support, we’re helping women to remain in the paid workforce. While it’s a great start, BOTH parents need to be factored into receiving support to care for their children. We need more opportunities for men to stay at home and take a pause from the paid workforce. Achieving more equal distribution of paid parental leave is the key to creating more equality in the workforce and in the home. It’s a workforce participation issue, rather than a women’s issue. If we can encourage more men to take the option of paid parental leave, we’ll see a fairer appreciation of childcare and the importance of access to childcare for both men and women. Paid parental leave gives men an opportunity to bond with their kids at a formative age, but also helps them to strengthen ‘softer’ emotional intelligence skills such as social skills, empathy, self-awareness and managing emotions. All of these are essential skills to make them better leaders in the workplace. Parents who share the care of their children in the first year are more likely to continue to share the care along the parenting adventure which is good for men, good for women, good for children and great for the family unit. When men start to take paid parental leave, they also start to appreciate the way parental leave can impact your confidence around returning to work.

Encouraging men to take parental leave normalises the option of sharing parental care, and also gives more value to the importance of ALL caring roles in our society. We can’t create pathways for women into the paid workforce and leadership positions without concurrently creating pathways for men into caring roles. More equitable paid parental leave will result in greater awareness and appreciation for the role of caring and carers in our society and more opportunities for feminine leadership. We’ll also find women AND men in leadership roles with better self-awareness, empathy and self-regulation. The leaders the world so desperately needs.

So, what can organisations do? Assess your paid parental leave policies, and actively encourage men in your workforce to take the option of parental leave. Normalise paid parental leave for men by encouraging it to be part of the conversation at every level of the organisation. Educate men in your organisation on the proven benefits of taking parental leave and spending formative time with their children. Recognise the potential benefits to your organisation of encouraging men to take parental leave, which will improve their leadership skills as a result. By Danielle Dobson. Danielle is an author, speaker and corporate coach, on a mission to break the Gender Code. Find out more about Danielle and her book, Breaking the Gender Code, at www.codeconversations.com.au

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SpeakIng to your KIds about COVID-19 With Sydney in lockdown, lots of families are pretty fearful right now about the Covid-19. We are constantly being inundated with information about the virus; whether that be on the news or social media. It’s dominating conversations, or we see the empty shelves at our local supermarket and worry. Many parents are looking for reassurance and strategies to support their children at this time. Although I’m writing in response to the Covid-19 pandemic, these strategies can be applied to any “big” event happening in your community that might impact on you and your child; like natural disasters and other health issues etc.

Don’t avoid discussing it. Although you might not be having direct conversations with your child about the virus, they will still hear whispers, pick up on your worries, feel or see increased tensions with being in lockdown etc. However; it’s important to understand that our children use their imagination to fill in the missing pieces. Even if you are avoiding talking about it to protect your child, not talking about an issue can make it feel like it’s something for them to worry about!

Consider their developmental level Based on their developmental level, take their cues before you share. When you do share, be mindful of their developmental level and how much is appropriate to share. Try not to overshare, just enough information so they understand what is going on, but not so much that they become overwhelmed.

Find out what they already know? It’s important to see what assumptions or guesses they might have made so you can correct any misunderstandings. You might also get some cues about how they are feeling (nervous, sad, scared etc), which will help you support them and reassure them

Invite them to ask questions This way you get quickly to the crux of what might be bothering them, or what they are focussing on. Just be mindful that if you let them ask questions, be prepared to give them some answers!

Take their lead If your child doesn’t have questions, don’t force it. Let them know that if they do have any questions that they can come to you. And just periodically check in with them or check their behaviour and emotions for any changes…in case they are internalising their worries and not sharing them with you.

They asked a question…how do I answer it? Try and give a brief yet honest answer. Just don’t offer too much detail if they haven’t asked about it. If you aren’t sure then it’s ok to tell them that you don’t know, but it’s a great opportunity to get your detective hats on and do a bit of research together and find out. Just ensure that you use reliable sources like government or international health websites.

Kids are egocentric Essentially this means our kids are focussed on themselves (by the way this is normal in children). So they might need some reassurance because they are worried about the potential impact on themselves and potentially their immediate family. Try not to get bogged down in statistics like transmission rates, or total infections, instead reassure them that children tend to experience less serious symptoms, and that actually the virus isn’t as common as other things like the flu.

What can they control?

Digital detox!

Big events like this can make kids feel pretty out of control because they have no direct impact on the situation or outcome. It’s essential to find things that your child can control, so they feel less afraid. This might be virus specific like teaching and encouraging proper handwashing. It could also be non-specific to the virus and just a general sense of control. Get them to choose a recipe for dinner, allow them to pick a movie for the family to watch together, give them a say in what clothes they wear for the day. Opportunities for choice and control will be age and developmentally specific, so if your child is old enough you could have this conversation and actually ask them what they control and get them to focus on this.

Of course you want to keep apprised of the latest updates, but it might be feeding into anxiety. Try to avoid giving your child access to social media or news sites without you being present, or if they are older do a bit of a check in after time spent online to debrief about what they saw/heard and if they have any questions. A digital detox could also be a great opportunity to connect as a family and spend some quality time together!

Manage your own worries Our kids are like little antennas. They are finely attuned to what we are doing and how we are feeling. I’m not saying don’t be worried, because of course the feeling is normal, but certainly try to avoid panicking or avoid your child’s exposure to panicked/stressful environments (where possible). Look after yourself, self-care, do your own research, makes decisions that help you feel in control (it’s not just our kids who need to feel in control of things), talk to a trusted friend or health care provider if you find you are really affected by stress or worries.

Keep to a routine (where possible) This will help you and your child feel calmer and will also help you feel like you are still in charge of certain things. When we have a routine, we feel safe because we know what to expect. So if your daily or usual activities need to change, turn your attention to creating a new routine that mimics the old routine as much as possible. If Monday used to be library day, find some digital books (some libraries do digital loans) or sit somewhere different in your house and read some books together. Did Tuesdays used to be mums and bubs yoga? Get on YouTube and watch a class online. Or, did your child belong to a sporting group? Watch some of their old matches together, or look at videos, do some drills in your backyard, watch YouTube for tutorials on technique etc.

It’s normal. Reassure your child that any feelings they are having a normal and they are ok. It’s also very natural to want to “fix” things when our kids are distressed, but this isn’t something we adult can individually “fix”. so just spend some time acknowledging how you and your child are feeling. It’s surprising just how impactful it can be for our children (and us) to have someone really hear our emotions, validate them and let them know you are there to support them “I can hear just how worried you are. Its normal, and everybody gets scared sometimes. I’m here if you want to talk or ask me something” While we can’t take this fear away from our kids, we can most definitely reduce their overwhelm and promote their wellbeing. So give these tips a try, every strategy is only a prompt of course, so please ensure that you think about the needs, abilities and preferences of your children and adjust as necessary. By Rachel Tomlinson. Rachel is a registered psychologist who has worked with adults, families, and children (birth through eighteen years old) in a variety of settings. She is also a mum with a 3 year old daughter! Follow her blog and podcast, Toward Wellbeing at www.towardwellbeing.com

Let’s talk about sex baby The impact of sexual problems on a relationship can be significant. Painful sex (dyspareunia), problems with libido, physical changes such as menopause can all impact on your sex life and your relationship.

Women and their partners often experience feelings of rejection, confusion, helplessness and frustration and the sooner these feelings are discussed the better the outcome for all concerned.

Consider having an open discussion with your partner and/or a health professional about how you feel. If you’ve been avoiding sex this can be especially difficult. But if you do find support, it can build intimacy and help you to manage your sexual relationship more honestly. The good news is there are strategies to help you.

It can also help if both partners read relevant books and seek out other resources together. It’s okay (and a good idea!) to have some fun with sexual exploration. Sometimes couples get into a ‘routine’ for sex that’s no longer working for one or both partners. Self-help books can be easily bought over the internet, so there’s no need to be shy.

Relationships and painful sex Feeling stressed, self-conscious about your body, depressed or anxious about intimacy can make sex uncomfortable, and even painful. Sometimes dyspareunia (painful sex) begins as a physical problem, but then has a flow-on effect to your psychological wellbeing and relationships, causing stress and anxiety. A vicious cycle can develop where past experiences of painful sex cause anticipatory fear of more pain. This fear creates stress, tension and reduces libido and arousal and as a result, sex becomes painful. For some women their past experiences may include sexual or emotional abuse, which can a be a trigger for experiencing painful sex, even in good relationships with an understanding partner. There are many ways two people can be sexual, or sensual, with each other that do not involve vaginal penetrative sex. Think of all the things you did before you had sex for the first time. We sometimes call this ‘outercourse’, and refers to kissing, hugging, fondling, touching etc. Treatment The right treatment depends on the cause of the pain, but almost all treatment options will include a combination of individual and couples sexual and relationship counselling. If you are in a relationship, encourage your partner to be involved in your treatment, particularly the counselling sessions. 18

Relationships and libido It is quite common for women to experience a decline in spontaneous sexual desire with age, or when you have been in a long-term relationship (hello marriage!). Chronic low libido can sneak up on you. Initially, you may feel like it’s just another dip in your sexual interest and manage it the way you have in the past; explaining it away as a normal response to the stresses of life. But, if low libido has been happening for a long time and it is distressing, or causing relationship disharmony, you should examine your real reasons for not wanting to have sex. Is it about short-term or recent events, or is it beginning to look like a way of life? Is it a way of life you want or is it distressing you? How does it impact on your partner? For couples, differences in sexual desire can create significant problems. A pattern of avoidance and resentment can build up especially if sex is initiated by one partner and refused by the other over and over again. The partner with lower libido may feel bothered by sexual overtures and the partner with higher libido may feel frustrated, rejected and unloved. Some couples stop being affectionate and loving with each other and negative feelings become more and more overwhelming. These difficult feelings, if not talked through, can impact negatively on the relationship.

What can you do about desire discrepancy?

Pain during sex

Solving the problem of desire difference in a relationship can be challenging. There is no magic wand (or pill, potion or cream) that will create sexual desire. And it’s not about just having sex whenever your partner wants.

Physical pain is a good reason not to desire sex. If you anticipate pain during sex, you will be anxious and this will reduce libido and arousal. Talk about the pain with your partner so they know how you are feeling.

Good sex can give a well-grounded relationship a really positive boost, but it won’t solve serious relationship problems. Relationship counselling might be an important first step in building trust and communication before working on a sexual problem. More complicated personal reasons can also underlie low libido, so seek counselling if you think this is the case.

You should not experience pain during sex so don’t ignore it if you do.

Stress Stress is part of life. It may be related to day-today ‘busyness’ with too much to do, and never enough time. Or it may be a more serious and recent event such as job loss, illness or death of a loved one. It is not always reasonable for some people to feel like having sex around the time of serious stress. But if normal day-to-day stress is getting on top of you, it’s probably worth considering some strategies that might help you get on top of it. Think about the sort of things that make you feel tense or stressed and not sexual. Can you make a decision to give yourself some time each day where you will make the effort to relax and not focus on the stressful things? Letting go of stress may not be easy, but if you can find a way to relax, it may give you the energy and the focus you need to enjoy life and maybe sex as well.

Talk with your partner Frightening as it can seem, consider having an open discussion with your partner about how you feel. If you’ve been avoiding sex this can be especially difficult. But if you do it well, it will build intimacy and help you to manage your sexual relationship more honestly. The aim of this is not to have you swinging from the chandelier every night of the week. It’s to enhance honesty, intimacy, fun and pleasure in your relationship and hopefully help you manage differences in sexual desire instead of using excuses to avoid the issue. It’s also not to encourage you to have sex when you don’t want to. Use it as a pathway to understanding each other and finding a middle ground that is more satisfying to both of you. Don’t forget that it will take ongoing commitment and revisiting the discussion to keep it working in the long-term. And if you get stuck, talk to a trained sex therapist. For more information visit www.jeanhailes.org. au/health-a-z/sex-sexual-health Published with the permission of Jean Hailes for Women’s Health.

Fabulous food We’ve always loved local so we put the call out for some fabulous local Aussie food brands and we’re super happy with what came back. Here were our top picks...

Rio Vista Nothin’ But Olives Let’s keep this simple. This bottle is filled with nothin’ but 100% South Australian grown and harvested olives. Grown naturally in the Adelaide Hills and sunny Murraylands, picked by friendly people and cold extracted within 6 hours of harvest. No numbers, nothing imported, everything fresh.

Remedy Drinks A pub classic, the old Lemon, Lime & Bitters... but full of gut lovin’ goodness. Reach for the right stuff and old school refreshment with Remedy’s all-natural, live cultured, twist on Lemon, Lime & Bitters.

Sprout

Murray River Organics

These super-cute plant-based snack bars for kids are the perfect solution to keep your little one happy and satisfied between meals. Healthy, tasty and intolerance-friendly to be enjoyed by all, Sprout bars are the perfect way to help give your child a nourishing start to life.

An all-time classic, this 100% organic apple & cinnamon muesli, from local biz Murray River Organics, is a fan favourite for good reason. Made with organic oats, organic sultanas, organic diced dates, organic raw diced almonds, organic cinnamon powder and the hero, organic diced dried apple.

Spotty This banana bread mix is made using certified natural and organic ingredients which have been mainly sourced from Australian farmers. All their mixes are gluten free and only require four ingredients - Spotty Bananas, oil, eggs and of course this baking mix!

Blue Dinosaur With Collagen and Egg Whites. Welcome to the cleanest protein bars in the world!

Two Birds Brewing We love the aptly named Two Birds’ beer because it’s run by two awesome Melbourne chicks! Their Passionfruit Summer Ale is pale and hazy like the balmy arvos we miss. It uses the tropical fruit hop trio of Amarillo, Mosaic and Galaxy with Passionfruit puree added to the fermenter. It tastes like sunshine and is best enjoyed in a hammock or just with your gal-pals!

Sweetpea Sweetpea dried baby food (with 4 fab flavours) is your quick and wholesome meal solution for your little one. Made with Aussie grown fruits, veggies and grains. Fortified with iron. Simply add 80ml of warm water to 10g of dry product to make mushy.

Lakanto With a mantra of being #ResponsiblySweet, all Lakanto products are made using Monkfruit that is grown using the same ancient, traditional methods used by the monks that give the fruit its name. Lakanto Golden Malt Flavoured Syrup is a versatile ingredient for baking and desserts to add chewiness and a delicious touch of sweetness. It is also great as a topping and in drinks, with 75% less calories than rice malt syrup.

Motive Matcha Australia’s first ready-to-drink sparkling matcha has just launched with four delicious flavours – Ginger, Apple, Yuzu, and Lychee. A new, and oh-so-tasty, way to enjoy the benefits of matcha sugar-free and on-the-go. With only seven calories a bottle, this new kid on the health block is a guilt-free alternative.

Mingle Unlike the other guys, Mingle Spice Blends are always natural and free from nasty additives. Mingle’s NO NASTIES All Purpose is the go-to flavour punch that you can use for every meal. This dials the flavour of meat and takes vegetables up to the next level.

Sans Drinks When you’re trying to stay off the booze but miss your favourite Summer cocktail.... Made in Sydney, Lyre’s make non-alcoholic versions of classic spirits. This Italian Spritz tastes almost exactly like Aperol, especially when mixed with a non-alcoholic sparkling wine such as local McGuigan Zero Dry Sparkling. Cheers!

Who Gives a Crap So we’re not eating this. But we are going to need it after we’ve eaten if you get my drift! Get out your glasses and gather up the kids because the search for the loo starts...now! Certified B Corp Who Gives A Crap has just released the limited ‘Where’s The Loo’ edition with a hidden toilet on each of the wrappers. Available late August.

Taoca Gluten free, vegan, low fat, cholesterol free Brazilian tapioca crepes! These Brazilian tapioca crepes are a popular street food made with cassava starch, which has been part of the Brazilian Indigenous diet for centuries. They are very versatile and can be cooked with a variety of savoury or sweet fillings. 21

I can do It! How often have we heard young children announce, ‘I can do it!’ or ‘I do it myself!’ as they take control and claim their right to do things by themselves? The feeling of being in control is a powerful drive in young children and when they have opportunities to do things by themselves it can provide satisfaction as well as a sense of empowerment to keep trying and having a go. It can remind us to slow down and give children time and opportunity to stretch their independence skills and become more self-reliant. Developing the skills for self-help and being more independent are encouraged in early childhood education and care services. Services are guided by the Australian Early Years Learning Framework (EYLF) and the learning outcomes to help children develop a strong sense of identity and support their emerging autonomy and resilience. This important area of child development is also highlighted in the National Quality Standard (NQS) where services are required to offer educational programs, physical environments and health and safety processes that foster children’s independence, confidence and wellbeing. Children have an urge to do grown up tasks and will often mimic home life and familiar rituals in their play. As they explore, develop and grow, children are ready to take some control and put new skills into practice. Giving children some autonomy to safely help out with everyday tasks at home allows them to experience a sense of control and purpose as they continue to develop their independence. Depending on family schedules, go with the most suitable times where there is some flexibility for children to practice self-help skills. They will want to take their time, to do things ‘right’ and in their own way, so it’s best to avoid times when you are in a hurry or have a fixed schedule. 22

Set aside some suitable time when there is usually a more relaxed structure to the day, such as on weekends and during holidays, for children to practice some tasks independently. This will allow children time to test their skills and problem solve with adult guidance. Depending on children’s age and stage of development, they can assist with many tasks at home, including helping with simple food preparation, setting and clearing the meal table, pouring their own drinks, watering plants, dressing themselves, helping to fold laundry, responsibility for feeding pets, making their bed, packing their own bag, helping with shopping, etc. As children develop their abilities and increase in confidence they can manage extra responsibility and more complex tasks. Children feel they are trusted and accepted when they have a chance to attempt new things by themselves with the guidance of supportive adults and peers. In early childhood services, teachers encourage children to take responsibility for their own belongings, taking care of looking after their own bags, hats and water bottles. Self-help stations with mirrors are provided for young children to put on sunscreen by themselves. They learn to follow hygiene routines and become successful with toileting independence.

Teachers encourage children to take responsibility for their own belongings, taking care of looking after their own bags, hats and water bottles. Teachers carefully set up the learning environments to give children choices in where and how they play, and a range of resources to use. As well as offering flexible play options, this purposeful arrangement of learning spaces promotes children’s decision-making, collaboration with others and independent thinking. Becoming self-sufficient and confidently independent are some of the skills

that are important contributors to children’s learning and readiness for school. Opportunities to make decisions and learn self-help skills supports children to develop resilience as they work out ways to cope and try different approaches when things don’t go as planned. They learn to problem solve and back their own decisions as they tackle new tasks. When children master new skills and experience success with independent work, their confidence grows along with enhanced

self-esteem. A positive and strong sense of selfesteem – how we value ourselves – is critical for good mental health and overall wellbeing. Children with an optimistic view of their abilities and a positive mindset are motivated to embrace new learning today and tomorrow. By Sabina Klepp, Education Practice Partner, Story House Early Learning. www.shel.edu.au Reference: Dowling, Marion (2010), Young children’s personal, social & emotional development (Third edition), Sage Publications, London.

Children feel they are trusted and accepted when they have a chance to attempt new things by themselves.

EVERY NIGHT OF THE Everything I love, I love with saturating intensity. Food is not the exception; it’s the first passionate relationship I had. When I was four I would relish eating warm buttery toast in bed at a way-too-early hour (thanks Dad for indulging me). Then I’d climb into my parents’ bed and complain about pointy scraps in the sheets, earning me the title of Princess Fancy Crumb.

And in my first share flat, there was that roast chicken with basil and wine dish by Nigel Slater that changed my life. Food – all food – became an exciting journey. If I didn’t like something, I wondered why, and tried cooking it in different ways. For this rather selfish reason I am the cook at home. Not necessarily to nourish my family or to indulge my friends with the gift of feasting; more so to play with the thing I love, to replicate something I have eaten out, to ex a new tool or try a new process.

Rose-vanilla bath melts At age seven or so I had a play date who brought a tin of wonderfully artificial home-brand spaghetti. Lunch that day would be the stuff of dreams. No ham and cheddar grazing plates, no garden herb omelette made from our own hens’ eggs, no Promite and sprouts on dark caraway rye – that day, we would dine on something loaded with sugar and salt, yet completely bland and utterly without air or emotion. My excitement was palpable. The heartbreak set in the moment Mum delivered our plates to the table. She had lightly heated the food (unnecessary but acceptable) and then stirred through an equal quantity of roughly torn flat leaf parsley that was so robust it had surely twice seeded. Fury and tears inevitably followed. Looking back, I’m convinced the PTSD from this incident motivated me to become the curator of everything that goes into my mouth. By the time I was nine I knew how to separate eggs to make mayonnaise and meringues, but also the perfect quantity of water + time on the stove and seasoning to get the most Shirley Temple tasty bounce out of a 2-minute noodle. Then there was the boscaiola period of 1995 (I still don’t understand how something can be SO delicious and sickening at the same time). As a teen, I had an unruly crew of friends who would seek munchie satisfaction in our Bondi kitchen when we’d skip school, eating crushed summer tomato and garlic spaghetti.

I am just lucky that my obsession benefits those around me. I’ve always found it incredibly satisfying to induce appreciative moans in people and so far, making incredible food has been one of the easiest ways for me to do that. Pair that with a weakness for laughter and big gatherings, and the generous facade is complete. I have been a food, lifestyle and event stylist in Sydney for over 20 years, and have recently been able to add food writer and consultant to the bill. I began this illustrious career under the guidance of Donna Hay. Aside from teaching me to appreciate the beauty of seasonal food, she once said something during a heartbreaking time in my life that has forever made sense: ‘You need to prioritise. We are making pretty pictures for a magazine.’ I am grateful because this sentiment has allowed me to drive my passion and profession, while keeping love and humour firmly at the top of the list. My new book’s namesake is my Instagram account @EveryNightOfTheWeek, which was originally a space for me to document the dinners I made for my family. Mild envy of people with a repetitive repertoire inspired a personalised visual menu board, so I didn’t have to think what I was going to make. It also gave me an outlet to love, question and mildly mortify my family. It turns out the daily struggle and juggle is real, and we are far better off enjoying it all together than alone.

x Lucy Tweed

WEEK

Some days you want to cook; other days the goal is simply ‘food in mouths’. Welcome to Every Night of the Week! x Lucy

Drunken dumplings Serves 2

Method: Preheat the oven to 200°C.

Ingredients: 1 teaspoon olive oil 1 chicken breast fillet (around 220g) 8 frozen dumplings 180g somen noodles 2 tablespoons tom yum paste 400ml tin coconut milk 2 heads of bok choy 1 teaspoon sesame oil 1 tablespoon lime juice 1–2 teaspoons chilli paste

Heat the oil in a large ovenproof frying pan over high heat and pan-fry the chicken breast for 2 minutes each side. Place in the oven for a few minutes to finish cooking through. Boil the dumplings for 1 minute or until thawed. Add the somen noodles and cook according to the packet instructions. Drain. Remove the pan from the oven and set the chicken aside.

ml) of water to the tin and swish it around, then add to the pan. Bring to a simmer, stirring to combine with the tom yum paste. Meanwhile, lightly steam the bok choy. Slice the chicken and divide among two shallow bowls, then add the noodles, dumplings and bok choy. Pour the broth over the top. Drizzle with sesame oil, then the lime juice and top with as much chilli paste as you can handle.

Fry the tom yum paste over medium–high heat for 2 minutes, then pour in the coconut milk. Add ½ cup (125 25

Pulled pork tacos with pickled pineapple Serves 8

1.5 kg pork neck

16 tacos, soft or hard Marinade 1 cup pineapple juice 1 cup barbecue sauce 3 tbsp American mustard 1 onion, quartered 2 tspn coriander seeds 1 tbsp cumin seeds 2 tbsp dried oregano 1 cinnamon stick 1 head of garlic, crushed 1 tbsp sea salt Pickled pineapple 2 cups white vinegar ¾ cup sugar 1½ tbsp sea salt 3 cardamom pods, bruised 1 whole pineapple, peeled, cored if liked and thinly sliced

Slaw 3 cups shredded cabbage 2 tbsp kewpie mayonnaise Juice of 1 lime 2 tbsp chopped chives 1 tspn sea salt Method: Preheat the oven to 120°C.

Combine all marinade ingredients in a heavy ovenproof dish with a lid. Add the pork and turn to coat on all sides. Place a piece of baking paper over the pork and press it down into the juices. Pop the lid on, place in the oven and cook gently for 6 hours. Remove and allow to cool, then shred the meat with tongs and stir with all the juices, breaking up the garlic

and onion as you go. Discard cinnamon stick. The pork can be made ahead of time, and reheated to serve. For the pickled pineapple, combine the vinegar, sugar, salt, cardamom and 2 cups (500 ml) of water in a saucepan. Bring to a simmer, then allow to cool slightly. Place the pineapple in a large airtight jar and pour the pickling liquid over the top. Seal and allow to pickle for at least an hour. Store in the fridge for up to 2 weeks. To make the slaw, toss all the ingredients together in a bowl. Warm the taco shells then take all the components to the table and let everyone help themselves.

A chocolate thing Serves: 6 Ingredients:

1 cup frozen raspberries (or fresh if in season)

130g butter, melted

Vanilla ice cream, optional

1 cup sugar

Method:

1 tspn vanilla extract

Preheat the oven to 180°C.

3 tbsp cocoa powder

For the stewed rhubarb, combine the rhubarb, orange juice and sugar in a saucepan and simmer over medium heat for 10 minutes until the fruit has softened.

3 eggs ½ cup plain (all-purpose) flour ½ cup hazelnut meal 1 cup roughly chopped dark chocolate 10 pink marshmallows Stewed rhubarb 1 bunch rhubarb, trimmed and cut into 5 cm lengths 3 tbsp orange juice ½ cup sugar

Remove from the heat and stir in the raspberries, then allow the mix to cool. Whisk together the butter, sugar, vanilla and cocoa powder until light and creamy.

Gently fold in the flour, hazelnut meal and chocolate until just combined. Put the rhubarb in the base of a greased ovenproof frying pan (the one I used is 25 cm/ 10 inches) or baking dish and spread evenly. Dot with the marshmallows, and spoon the chocolate batter over the top. Bake for 30 minutes or until puffed and slightly crispy on the edge. This can be served a bit underdone, like a self-saucing pudding.

Whisk in the eggs, one at a time.

Images and text from Every Night of the Week by Lucy Tweed; photography by Lucy Tweed. Murdoch Books RRP $35.00.

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FEEDING TEENS WELL In some ways I feel nutrition is the forgotten cousin of teenage health. Even though teens themselves care a lot about it. From obsessing about their thigh gaps to their acne, from the impact of nutrition on their fatigue or their brains, from tummy aches and bloating, to the problem of eating disorders, what teens eat really matters. So, no book on teenagers would be complete without a close look at your teen’s diet. The topic of teenage nutrition needs an entire book to do it justice, and this is not an encyclopaedia of food for your teenager. Instead, it’s meant to give you some practical advice about your teen’s eating, touch on the issues we see most in our practices, and discuss those that the experts we talked to get most concerned about. Most importantly, we don’t judge you. In a busy household, with working parents, not enough hours in the day and more fights with your teen than you want to poke a stick at, this is not easy. A lot of us eat far less healthily than we think we do. We imagine we eat enough vegies and fibre and that our snack consumption is low. But, if we kept a diary, we’d discover most of us could do much better. And what we eat as parents influences our children’s diets: they are watching us like hawks and their BS detectors are razor sharp. So, any change cannot be aimed at your teen alone. This needs to be a whole family approach, and you will reap the benefits as well, I promise.

Our teens aren’t eating well Not a surprise news flash . . . Only one in three people aged 12–24 years eats the recommended two to three serves of fruit per day. Boys eat less fruit than girls. When it comes to vegetables, the situation is even worse. Only one in seven people aged 12–17 years eats the 30

recommended four serves of vegetables per day, and only one in twenty people aged 18–24 years meets the guideline of five serves of vegetables per day. One in four Australian children and adolescents is technically overweight or obese, and one in 12 is obese. And, while that number is stable and not increasing, it has so many negative implications for physical and mental health that we should all still be alarmed by it. The prevalence of obesity increases with age – up to 31 per cent by age 17. And 38 per cent of Indigenous children and adolescents are obese – a number that is increasing. Does it matter? Yes. Research tells us that a good diet that starts in childhood or adolescence is likely to persist into adulthood. And the opposite is true: toddlers with a poor diet are more likely to grow into teens and adults with a dodgy diet. It is more complex than simply ‘too much bad food, not enough good food’. There are other contributing factors: lack of sleep, lack of exercise, too much time on screens . . . But, when it comes to being overweight, diet is the thing that needs to change most. Science is yet to determine the optimum amount of ‘junk food’ (in the ‘junk food’ category, I am including white bread and crackers, many commercial breakfast cereals, any drink that’s not water, milk, tea or coffee, and most ‘snacks’, even if you buy them in the health-food aisle at the local supermarket. Many contain high amounts of fat, salt and processed carbohydrates that contribute to diseases such as diabetes.) One junk food touted as a healthy option is the Subway sandwich. Given that the ‘bread’ roll contains 10 per cent sugar, in 2020 Ireland’s Supreme Court ruled that it was not allowed to be called bread! Ideally, the amount of junk food your teen consumes should sit around zero. Given that’s not going to happen, let’s just say that a daily intake of junk food is catastrophic.

As I said, this isn’t a nutrition textbook; we have neither the space nor the head room to take a comprehensive look at all teenagers’ nutritional needs. So we’re going to head into the nutritional lowlights and problems we see the most, and also touch on the thorny issues of veganism, protein bingeing and the like.

• Frozen vegetables are as nutritious as fresh. Keep a few different packs of peas, corn, spinach and beans in the freezer so you can serve vegies with every meal. A quick steam or zap in the microwave, a drizzle of lemon juice and seasoning, and they’re ready to go.

Food tips for busy parents:

• Keep the pantry stocked with tinned foods such as legumes, tomatoes and tuna and some wholewheat pasta, so that you always have easy access to a quick, nutritious meal. Have a couple of super-simple go-to recipes, such as pasta with tuna and tomato sauce, if there’s nothing else available.

For parents who’ve battled the commute and are ravenously hungry themselves as they enter the house, standing in the kitchen for an hour to make a healthy meal for everyone might just not be feasible. I turned to nutritional counsellor Ginette Lenham for some helpful hacks to make dinner-time less challenging: • Get organised. Pop on a podcast or audiobook and wash and chop vegies on Sunday. Store them in an airtight container in the fridge to use up during the week. • Need to buy take-away? Don’t beat yourself up over it. Take-away doesn’t have to mean unhealthy – choose stir-fried vegetables with meat, seafood or tofu, or a poke bowl or big salad. • Make your freezer your best friend. When you do cook, make extra so you can freeze half for another meal.

One in four Australian children and adolescents is technically overweight or obese

• If you can afford to use a meal-delivery service, maybe organise to have them for the nights of extra busy workdays. • In summer, serve up a big platter of chopped vegies, hard-boiled eggs and a barbecued chicken with slices of multigrain sourdough bread or low GI wraps and dinner is ready . . . no cooking required! • Take advantage of the prepared salads, green leaves and chopped vegies available in most supermarkets. They can be a huge time saver. Extract from The New Teen Age by Dr Ginni Mansberg and Jo Lamble. (Murdoch Books RRP $32.99) How to support today’s tweens and teens to become healthy, happy adults.

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GERM GEMS Kids and germs go hand-in-hand. Now, more than ever, the importance of good hygiene for the whole family is imperative. But how do we get kids to understand the importance of washing their hands? It can be hard to explain to your little one why we should take certain precautions from things we can’t see. It can be hard for them to understand the concept of germs and viruses, so we’ve put some ideas together for you...

Create a germ character Start by introducing the concept of a germ to your little one with an imaginary thing called Mr Germ. Explain that although he isn’t like a normal friend or a pet who you can see, he is a living thing, just a tiny one that you can only see through a microscope. These tiny creatures can multiply and spread super quickly and they are the bad guys who try to fight the good guys in your body. After you have covered the basics of germs for kids, Mr Germ will still seem confusing. Why are they the bad? How do they spread? How will they make me sick? How can I stop them? These are some of the questions your child might ask. That’s why the following ideas can help teach your child the valuable lessons and reasoning behind why Mum and Dad aren’t just telling you to “wash your hands” for fun.

Glitter germs You know when the kids have been playing with glitter and you find it everywhere.... Glitter spreads like germs from contact so makes a really good example! It’s also really hard to wash off without soap, like germs! So get your child to rub their hands with some of their favourite glitter then let them touch a few surfaces around the house. The glitter will easily spread, which can be used as a great example as to how easy it is for germs to leave traces all around us. Next, get them to wash their hands with just water. Is the glitter all coming off? I doubt it. Now add soap and see how the glitter all washes away, just like the germs will with proper hand washing.

The potato experiment This is a great experiment to see the effect of germs. Wash your hands (but not the kids’) and peel a raw potato and cut it in half. Take one half and get the kids to handle it for a minute. Then get the kids to wash their hands with soap and water then get them to handle the second potato. Place each potato in its own zip-lock bag and label which one is which. Place the two bags in a dark cupboard and leave them there for about a week then pull the bags out and compare the two. The unwashed hand potato will be showing signs of mould caused by the germs whilst the clean hands one should look much better. Discuss the results with the kids.

Look at magnified germs online

Make a hand washing chart

It might be a good idea to show your child what actual germs look like. Google an image of a germ under a microscope and show it to them. This will help them put germs into a real-life context and make them want to avoid getting germs in the first place.

Create a chart where you can tick off how many times and where you washed your hands. Stickers, stamps, or letting them add their own ticket are all a fun way to reward them for a job well done. Maybe a treat at the end of the day to reward them for their good hand washing.

Show them how a sneeze or cough can travel through air Mucous droplets from sneezes and coughs can travel quite far and kids need to understand the importance of avoiding this by coughing into their elbow and avoiding germs on their hands. To demonstrate this take a spray bottle and add some water and some food colouring. Pretend that the water is a sneeze. Spray it over a blank paper or tissue to see how far the coloured water ‘sneeze’ reaches.

Sing a hand washing song Singing a song while washing your hands is a great way to both time kids and also make the task fun. You can try singing the below song to the tune of Row, row, row your boat, or make up your own little ditties! Repeat this several times and it will help drag out the washing time enough to ensure they cover all the dirty spots. Follow our hand washing chart overleaf to make sure you cover every inch of their hand.

The hand washIng song Wash, wash, wash your hands Wash them nice and clean Scrub them here Scrub them there And scrub them in between (sung to the tune of Row, row, row your boat)

Pin me above the sink!

House-bound fun How to entertain your energetic pre-schooler when you’re stuck in Sydney lockdown! What a very unique time we have on our hands. And with the uncertainty facing us over the coming weeks, many parents have begun to feel overwhelmed at the looming task of keeping pre-school and early primary kids at home. Here are four simple activities to get those bodies moving and squeeze every last morsel of energy out of the kids without destroying your house! And the best news is; they use no more than what you are likely to have on hand (thank goodness, because those shops are just not worth the stress right now).

1. Scavenger hunt Think of everyday items around the house to find. You can draw a picture of each item to find or alternatively, why not do a colour scavenger hunt and get the kids to find items that match. An old egg carton is a fun container to collect everything in.

2. Jumpin’ jacks Simply find yourself a roll of masking tape and place some lines on the floor for kids to jump over. Different jumping options you can try are: • Hop over each line on one leg. • Hop backwards over them. • Long jump: How many lines can they jump over in one go? • Run and jump: Experiment with how much farther they can jump with a running head start. • Balancing beam: Take the tightrope challenge and try to walk along the line, and then jump to the next one. • Put your feet on one end: How far can you stretch and reach? For older children, try taping letters or numbers on the floor and stringing a few commands together to test their memory. For example, ‘walk backwards between A and E, and then crab walk from E to D’ etc.

3. Red Light, Green Light or “What’s the Time Mr. Wolf?” These schoolyard classics work equally well on a porch or in the hallway and are perfect when you have more than 2 kids at home. For Red Light, Green Light: Player 1 (the person who is ‘IT’) stands approximately 5m away from the others. With their back towards the players, this person yells ‘Green Light’ and the others move forward until player 1 spins around and shouts ‘Red Light’. If player 1 catches anyone moving, they must return back to the starting line. The game progresses with ‘Green Light’ and ‘Red Light’ until someone tags the person who is ‘IT’ without getting caught. For “What’s the Time, Mr. Wolf”, it’s a similar arrangement with player 1 (the “Wolf”) approximately 5 metres away and with their back turned to the other players. The other players chant “What’s the time, Mr. Wolf?” and the Wolf says a time, such as, “5 o’clock”. The other players step 5 steps towards the Wolf, counting aloud as they go. The game continues until the Wolf responds, “Dinner Time” and turns on the players. They must run to safety behind the start line without getting tagged by the Wolf.

4. Pantyhose bowling A game that will have everyone in stiches of laughter. Simply place an apple or tennis ball in the leg of a stocking and tie it around your waist. Place some cups on the floor and get those hips swinging to try and knock them down! Hopefully this list starts to get those creative juices flowing! And a final tip: be sure to let the kids plan and execute the activity… it may never quite end up the way that it was supposed to (in fact, it almost definitely won’t), but by giving them ownership over the direction the activity takes, you are guaranteed to maximise engagement time and creativity. By Alice Zsembery. Alice is the author of “Real Kids, Real Play”. It provides over 150 activities for pre-schoolers and early primary students to do at home using typical household items. Real Kids, Real Play is available online in print and eBook at www.realkidsrealplay.com.au, as well as at Big W and all good bookstores.

Simple steps to help stop the spread. Cough or sneeze into your arm

Bin the tissue

Use a tissue

Wash your hands

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WINTER eczema exIt Statistics suggest that one in three Aussie kids suffer from eczema and up to one million Australians have been affected by eczema at some point in their lives. The Australian government recently announced a $270 million subsidy for Australians over the age of 12 who suffer from severe eczema and have not responded favourably to topical creams and ointments. However, for children aged 12-and-under who are not covered by the subsidy, thankfully there are a range of easy-to-follow skincare tips and routines that can potentially help to minimise the incidence and severity of eczema flare ups. President of the Eczema Association Australasia Inc EAA, Cheryl Talent, says, “If your child suffers from eczema, you may see an increase in symptoms as we enter the cooler months, including intense itching, dry and cracked skin, and even infection. This makes it a good time to try something different for your child’s skincare routine. While there is not yet a cure for eczema, good management is achievable using prescribed treatments and suitable skincare products. It is now widely recognised that constant moisturising of the skin helps to maintain the skin barrier and promote healing.”

Winter flare ups More than half of all eczema sufferers experience flare ups related to environmental and physical triggers, with change in weather being the biggest issue for most of them (72%). With winter fast approaching, cold and dry weather can sap skin of essential moisture and may cause serious issues for skin that is already compromised. Itching and inflammation can also lead to a breakdown in our body’s main line of defence, our protective skin barrier.

Tips for managing eczema whilst in the cooler months The EAA and Childs Farm, which is a proud Gold member of the Eczema Association Australasia (EAA), have jointly compiled a list of 10 tips for protecting your child’s skin throughout the cooler months:

1. Moisturising is key Liberally apply moisturiser to your child’s skin whilst it is damp (after a shower or bath) to help seal in the moisture from the water. Regular moisturising of the skin is absolutely essential to managing eczema. Ask your Pharmacist for samples of different products so you can always carry moisturiser with you. If you haven’t tried them before, a patch test is always recommended before using any new products. One of the EAA’s Gold partners, Childs Farm, is an option worth considering. Childs Farm uses naturally derived ingredients and essential oils to produce a range of mild, kind and delicioussmelling toiletries. The entire range is suitable for sensitive skin and suitable for skin that may be prone to eczema.

2. Avoid over-washing your hands Children’s hands can become dry, chapped and cracked during the cooler weather. Although we have been encouraging hand-washing during COVID, over-washing or scrubbing too hard can cause the skin to dry out and crack. Find a soap-free hand wash for your kids to use and teach them to apply moisturiser liberally after washing their hands. If their hands do become dry, use moisturiser before bedtime and have them wear cotton or bamboo gloves while they are sleeping to help seal in the moisture.

3. Treat flare ups promptly When you notice the first signs of your child having an eczema flare up, treat it accordingly. Use topical steroids and moisturisers to manage the itch and discomfort, and continue treating it until it has completely healed. Not treating eczema can lead to broken or cracked skin, which can result in infection.

4. Manage your indoor environment While you don’t have control of the weather and temperatures outside, you can control the temperature in your home. Not overheating your home and avoiding drying out the air by using a humidifier can help reduce the chance of your child having a flare up.

5. Be mindful of your child’s bathing conditions Make sure your child’s bath or shower water is warm, not hot, as hot water can dry out the skin and cause cracking. Limiting their shower or bath time to 5-10 minutes can help, however, we know the role that bath time plays in the development stages for children. If they are taking longer baths, use a soap-free cleanser or hypoallergenic bath oil that is less likely to irritate sensitive skin.

6. Know their triggers Not all children have the same triggers for eczema. Pay attention to what in their environment might cause a flare-up. Some people find allergens, dry air, cold wind, scented products, dust mites or household cleaning chemicals cause their eczema to flare. By understanding your child’s triggers, you can take steps to prevent the flare-up.

7. Layer their clothing During a transition from one season to another, weather can be unpredictable or rapidly change during the day. For example, it may be cold in the morning but warm by afternoon, or it may be nice in the morning and later be windy and cold. Instead of dressing your child only for the morning, put them in layers so they can add or take off a layer depending on the temperature throughout the day.

8. Use sun protection Summer might be over but there are still dangerous UV rays that can cause a sunburn or irritate your child’s skin. Apply suitable sunscreen to their skin every morning before leaving the house.

9. Pay attention to allergens Pollen is still in the air during the cooler months. In addition, allergens such as mould and mildew might be more prevalent, especially in damp weather. Take time to change filters on heating systems before starting them up to reduce the chance that turning on the heat will send allergens into the air in your house.

10. Make sure they drink plenty of water As the weather cools, your child may not feel as thirsty but their body still needs water. Staying hydrated helps keep their skin moisturised. For more information visit The Eczema Association of Australasia Inc (EAA) at www.eczema.org.au Childs Farm is stocked in Coles, Woolworths and BIG W stores across Australia as well as on online at childsfarm.com.au and Amazon.com.au.

on the shelf

kids

Bedtime Sorted! by Jimmy Rees Who said bedtime was hard? Dad’s got bedtime sorted! Lenny and the twins have a bath without water spilling over, brush their teeth without toothpaste spraying onto the mirror, and go to sleep straight after their story. Perfect! Dad can finally settle down to his dinner. But then – My pyjamas don’t match! I’m too cold! I’m too hot! The window is making funny noises! I’m not tired! From one of Australia’s best-loved comedians and children’s entertainers Jimmy Rees comes a story about bedtime excuses we know all too well Published by Affirm. RRP $19.99

When Anna Came to Stay by Maddy Tyers When Anna Came to Stay centres on a happy young girl called May who falls into heeding advice from her imaginary friend, Anna. Her plight is followed by the family who no longer recognise their daughter and hatch a plan to rescue May from the clutches of Anna. The book will open conversations around eating disorders and how they impact every area of a person’s life. Recognising the signs will help schools and families seek help before the disorder progresses further. The emotions are beautifully captured in a mix of mediums including watercolour and pencil by illustrator Siobhan Skipworth. Published by Interactive Publications. RRP $31.99.

Who Fed Zed? by Amelia McInerney Zed the fish is white and red. His poo hangs down in one long thread. The main thing, though, is what Fred said, ‘NEVER, EVER FEED ZED BREAD.’ A funny, rhyming picture book about Ted, Ned and Fred, Fred’s dog, Jed, and Fred’s fish, Zed. ‘Who Fed Zed? is fun and a bit ‘off the wall’’. It reminds readers to always check food packaging labels and was actually inspired by Amelia’s own daughter, who has a severe food allergy to nuts. When she was four, Amelia accidentally gave her a muesli bar that had peanuts in it. Published by Allen & Unwin. Ages 3–6. RRP $24.99.

We Go Way Back by Idan Ben-Barak Long, long ago, no one knows exactly where or when, a tiny bubble formed that was a Little Bit Different. It was the first living cell. Everyone’s ancestor. And so the story of life begins ... In this visually stunning and brilliantly devised picture book, Idan Ben-Barak and Philip Bunting lead us through the origin of life on our planet, and how an odd little bubble gave rise to the incredible web of life on Earth. Published by Allen & Unwin. RRP $24.99.

t(w)een The Story of Australia: For the young (and the curious) by Don Watson Watson guides readers from the ancient lands of Gondwana, through human settlement, colonisation and waves of migration, to the challenges facing our diverse nation today. Each era is brought to life in a series of beautifully illustrated spreads that capture a particular event or development – or give a snapshot of ordinary Australians at the time. Each chapter ends with a profile of a person, from the oldest Australian ever discovered, Mungo Woman, to pop icon Kylie Minogue. Published by Black Inc. RRP $32.99.

An Unexpected Hero. Pow Pow Pig 1 by Anh Do Hi there! My name is Piccolo. Also known as Pow Pow Pig! I live in the year 2050, and THE WORLD IS IN TROUBLE. Don’t worry though, because me and my friends Cha Cha Chicken, Kung Fu Duck and Barry the Goat are on the case. Me and my friends didn’t make the A team ... or the B team ... or the C, D or E teams .... We made the Z team! How are we going to save the world when we were the last ones picked?! Published by Allen & Unwin. 6-10 years old. RRP $15.99.

Everything I Thought I Knew by Shannon Takaoka Seventeen-year-old Chloe had a plan: work hard, get good grades, and attend a top-tier college. But after she collapses during cross country practice and is told that she needs a new heart, all her careful preparations are laid to waste. Eight months after her transplant, everything is different. Stuck in summer school with the underachievers, all she wants to do now is grab her surfboard and hit the waves – which is strange, because she wasn’t interested in surfing before her transplant. (It doesn’t hurt that her instructor, Kai, is seriously good looking.) And that’s not all that’s strange. Published by Walker Books. RRP $18.99.

Girls in boys cars by Felicty Castagna A complicated friendship. A roadtrip in a stolen car. The stories that define us. And two funny, sharp, adventurous young women who refuse to be held back any longer. Rosa was never really trying to hurt anyone, no matter what they said in court. But she’s ended up in juvenile jail anyway, living her life through books and wondering why her best mate Asheeka disappeared. A page-turning novel about a complicated friendship; a road trip through NSW in a stolen car; the stories that define us; and two funny, sharp, adventurous young women who refuse to be held back any longer. Published by Pan Australia. RRP $18.99.

for dad Dear Son. Letters and Reflections from First Nations Fathers and Sons by Thomas Mayor Dear Son shares heartfelt letters written by First Nations men about life, masculinity, love, culture and racism. Along with his own vivid and poignant prose and poetry, author and editor Thomas Mayor invites 12 contributors to write a letter to their son, father or nephew, bringing together a range of perspectives that offers the greatest celebration of First Nations manhood. A gentle and loving book for families from anywhere in the world. Published by Hardie Grant Books. Out: 1 Sept. RRP $34.99

Survivor: Life in the SAS by Mark Wales How do you rebuild your life when you’ve hit rock bottom? Mark Wales thought his life would end in a cornfield in Afghanistan. Mark and his SAS troops emerged from that scorched battlefield twelve hours later, his mentor gunned down, his dream career now a nightmare. Over four deployments of intense warfighting, Mark watched the line between right and wrong become blurred. When he left the SAS he was adrift, crippled by guilt. ‘A powerful, honest story of courage, redemption and finding purpose’ - Bear Grylls Published by Macmillan Australia. RRP $34.99

Seasonal Kitchen. 70+ delicious recipes from Fast Ed by Ed Halmagyi From zesty salads at the height of summer to hearty stews in the depths of winter, Better Homes and Gardens TV chef Ed Halmagyi shares more than 70 favourite dishes from his personal recipe collection, stretching across all four seasons of food. Fast Ed opens his personal recipe collection to share his favourite dishes. Think you-beaut breakfasts, grab-and-go snacks, easy but impressive entrees, tasty vegetarian fare, moreish mains and desserts so decadent everyone will find room for a helping. Plus, of course, delicious dishes to grill and thrill on the barbecue - perfect food for Aussie alfresco entertaining. Published by Are Media. RRP $29.99

Chance by Andrew Rule All his life, award-winning journalist and author Andrew Rule has watched the heroes and villains of racing: dreamers and schemers, winners and losers, horses and riders. In Chance, he distils the daring, the desperation and danger of the track into a bravura account of some of Australian racing’s most famous and infamous moments, its celebrations and its secrets, the grittiness of the gambling life behind the glitz and glamour. With an ear for the colloquial, the humorous and the absurd, and an eye for physical bravery and financial folly, Rule shows how racing still defines part of the Australian character. Published by Macmillan Australia. RRP $34.99

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for mum Rock On. The Crystal Healing Handbook for Spiritual Rebels by Kate Mantello If you are interested in the hype about sparkly rocks but aren’t sure about spiritual woo-woo, just read Kate Mantello’s introduction and you won’t be able to put the book down. Covering all aspects of crystal healing, from the scientific to the esoteric, and featuring 40 detailed crystal body layouts, this book is the definitive reference guide for those wanting to learn more about the hands-on side of crystal healing from a master crystal healer with a fresh and unique perspective. Published by Rockpool Publishing. Out: Sept 7. RRP $29.99

The Single Mother’s Social Club by Jacinta Tynan So, this isn’t at all what you had in mind, being a single parent, raising kids on your own - at least some of the time. You’re battling the day-to-day grind, making life-defining decisions while helping with homework, shoelaces and Book Week costumes, all the while working and maybe even having a social life. It can be arduous, lonely and overwhelming. But it can also be liberating not just adapting to your new normal, but wholeheartedly embracing it. In The Single Mother’s Social Club, journalist Jacinta Tynan interviews experts and single mothers to share the best advice for thriving when you’re the only adult in the home, along with her own experiences of making it as a single mum. Published by Murdoch Books. RRP $32.99

Inside Your Dreams. An advanced guide to your night visions by Rose Inserra Become the awakened dreamer. You will never again say ‘It’s just a dream!’ Inside Your Dreams provides awareness about your inner self and healing through actioning your dream images in your waking life. Unlock the mysteries of your dreams and the messages they hold for greater insight into your conscious waking life, your subconscious and the collective unconscious. Use this practical guide to climb inside your dreams and connect more deeply with yourself instead of wasting one third of your life only sleeping. Published by Rockpool Publishing. RRP $29.99

Small Joys of Real Life by Allee Richards Small Joys of Real Life is about how the life you have can change in an instant. It’s about friendship, desire, loss and growing up to accept that all you can do is be in the moment and look to find the joys in between. The night Eva shared a smile with Pat, something started. Two weeks later, lying together in her bed, Pat said, ‘You can’t live your life saying you’ll get around to doing something you know will make you happy. You just have to do it.’ Eva didn’t know how devastating those words would turn out to be. Pat dies and the aftershock leaves Eva unsteady. She is pregnant. And she has to make a choice. Published by Hachette Australia. RRP $32.99

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5 HEALING CRYSTALS TO HELP STRESS AND ANXIETY We all know that feeling of being overworked or totally, mindnumbingly overwhelmed. The racing heart and shallow breath that comes from being frozen in fear or paralysed by panic. The throbbing head pain that comes courtesy of a house full of screaming kids and the sleepless nights spent worrying about money; or health; or the current Covid situation. Stress is stressful! As a crystal healing practitioner for over 14 years and mother to two wildlings, I am personally and professionally familiar with the challenges that living with anxiety can bring. Fortunately, I have had a lot of success using crystal healing to help reduce the feelings of stress and anxiety in my own life and the lives of my clients. If you are feeling overwhelmed or are struggling with feelings of anxiety, know that it does get better. Next time you are craving some calm and clarity in your day, pour a cup of tea, light a relaxing candle and grab a crystal. Hold it against your forehead and focus on taking slow, deep breaths as you channel your stress into the crystal. Do this until you begin feeling more centred and relaxed. You may also like to hold a crystal against your heart, or in your hand. Don’t forget to cleanse your crystal afterwards by placing it in sunlight for a few minutes!

Not sure which crystal to use? Here are my top 5 crystals for helping stress and anxiety:

1. Sodalite Like most stones in the ‘blue’ family, the energy of sodalite is very cooling and calming. Place a piece of Sodalite over your 3rd Eye Chakra (in between your eyebrows ) or Crown Chakra (at the top and centre of your forehead) and feel instantly calmed by its relaxing energy. Not only is this gorgeous stone able to calm the most anxious mind, sodalite is also excellent for bringing clarity and perspective to an otherwise overwhelming situation!

2. Rose Quartz If a crystal could bake your favourite brownies and give you the best grandma cuddles, it would be rose quartz! This pale pink beauty resonates with the Heart Chakra and is a superstar when it comes to settling big emotions. Place it at the centre of your chest to help sooth panicinduced heart palpitations, or simply hold it in your hand to benefit from all the juicy love and support it radiates. Best of all, rose quartz reminds us to be gentle and forgiving towards ourselves, at times when we need it most. Soak in a rose quartz infused bath for the ultimate relaxation and support experience.

3. Hematite Hematite is not usually a contender when it comes to well-known crystals for supporting anxiety - but you would be surprised how effective it is! Because of its natural gravitational and magnetic energies, it is probably the most powerful grounding stone in the mineral kingdom. Placed between the feet or held in the lap

Next time you are craving some calm and clarity in your day, pour a cup of tea, light a relaxing candle and grab a crystal.

while seated, it will help you remain anchored when your thoughts or feelings get carried away. Hematite is also used to bring focus and strength to the mind - and anyone who has overcome anxiety, will tell you that strength of mind is essential!

4. Amethyst Being a deeply spiritual stone for the 3rd Eye and Crown Chakra, amethyst will help you to connect to your higher-self with more awareness. It is very calming and works on the mind to bring a sense of peace, serenity and almost a meditative state of mental relaxation. Hold amethyst gently against your forehead and breathe deeply and rhythmically the next time you begin to feel anxious. You will be amazed at how quickly you begin to feel calmer.

5. Amazonite As a natural balancer and cleanser, amazonite is most effective when used at the Solar Plexus Chakra (at the centre of your diaphragm) and Heart Chakra (at your heart). It energetically protects against negative and stressful environments and is used in crystal healing for stabilising emotional imbalance, releasing emotional trauma and calming overwhelming feelings. Hold amazonite close to your body and visualise yourself being surrounded by its colour, which is washing away any irrational thoughts or panicky feelings. Kate Mantello, author of Rock On: The Crystal Healing Book for Rebels (Rockpool Publishing $29.99) is a Master Energy Healing Practitioner and founder of Evolve Healing Institute - a world class online training platform for professional crystal healing practitioners. Rock On is now available where all good books are sold and online at www.rockpoolpublishing.com.au

When was your last dental check dentalhealthweek.com.au | 2 - 8 August

Sydney MamaMag Aug/Sep 2021

Articles inside

Healing crystals

Meals together

Feeding teens well

Kitchen science

On the shelf

Winter eczema exit

Healthy gut = healthy brain

Raising kids who explore

Every night of the week

I can do it

Breaking breastfeeding barriers

Let’s talk about sex

Fabulous food

Childcare

Sydney in a jigsaw

Jimmy still makes us giggle

Why we love spooning