port phillip
September 2015
WIN tickets to the career Ideas for mums expo Budget busting Dream kingdom Moving marvels Career change Tiny bedrooms
free Local fun for the Port Phillip mum 1
Coco’s Early Learning Centre is a family operated state of the art kindergarten and long day care for children from 6 weeks to 5 years. • A secure and nurturing environment for children • Highly qualified and caring staff • Fun filled programs enriching each child’s individual development • Nutritious and delicious meals prepared by inhouse chef • Complimentary Yoga, Music and Sport programs • Multicultural programming and events
Call us now on 9528 2812 or email caulfield@cocoselc.com.au 249 Glen Eira Road Caulfield North www.cocoselc.com.au 2
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hello spring From spotting the first blossom in bloom, I get so excited for the promise of longer warmer days to come. Like those Lilies in my garden that are popping up to say hello, I come alive in the sunshine. September means a big shout out to all the Daddo’s this month for Father’s Day. It’s such a beautiful relationship to watch grow, between daughter and father. If only I could freeze time, our ‘baby’ is growing way too fast! We spoke with Emma Masterton from EJM Photography this month about capturing those precious newborn photos. It only seems like yesterday. Three years gone in a blink. The past month at MamaMag HQ has been really exciting. Our little family has expanded, adding four more lovely mamas to our team. You may spot Kate Thompson around Port Phillip spreading the MamaMag love as our new Sales and Marketing superstar. This month, boss lady, Sarah Cavalier is in the running for the national AusMumpreneur Emerging Business Award. We are super excited to get our Hollywood Glam on (theme of the awards) and get dressed up to celebrate mums in business across Australia. We’ll report back to you from the red carpet in next month’s edition. Inside this month we’re talking all things home design and real estate. Another passion of mine! In my early working years, I was a Leasing Manager in charge of New Projects around the inner city. My love for property has not dulled over time and I’m forever glued to realestate.com.au. We’ve attended a few auctions over the past month and walked away with nothing but a free hot chocolate (love when the agent organises those coffee vans)! The search remains. The dream continues! I always was, and will always be, a dreamer. But I’d settle for a Kombi to travel around Australia in. In October we will be exploring the rapidly growing world of Heath and Wellness. If you have any ideas or great businesses who might like to get involved, please get in touch. We love your contributions and conversations. It makes doing what we do, even more amazing. Sarah is currently training with Sam Woods - The Bach! Lucky lady. She’ll give you all the low-down next month! We are also kick-starting our health and wellness with a 9km run for a great local cause, Conner’s Run, which we will tell you all about next month. Hopefully Team MamaMag will raise some funds for this local cause fundraising for brain cancer. Time to hit those cycle classes. Wish me luck!
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Contents Budget busting 6 The ins and outs Dream Kingdom 8 Tips for the perfect bedroom On the move 12 Things to consider when moving Buying a new home 14 Do you need a buyers advocate? Parklife 16 Artplay Playground Birrarung Marr Post-baby career change 18 Danielle Ross-Walls has it covered Become a mumpreneur 19 Things to think about Home beautiful 20 Preparing your home for sale Turn auto off 22 An easy photography tip Mama loving 24 Gorgeous kids styling to inspire Lovely locals 26 We head down Glen Eira Road Circus skills cleanup 28 Cleaning fun for pre-schoolers Mama of the month 30 Suzanne Acteson from Habitots Growing food 32 Fun in the outdoor classroom Moments captured 34 Newborn photography Mama can cook 36 Food for Dad from Hello Table A father’s role 38 Give praise to Dad Thomas & Friends colouring comp 41 How are you feeling Dad? 42 Thoughts for new dads Clean your closet 44 And your soul!
MamaMag September 2015
WIN one of 2o tickets to the career Ideas for mums expo worth $36 each!
Visit our Facebook page to enter
www.facebook.com/localmamamag Entries open to Victorian residents only. Competition starts September 1st 12.01am and closes September 30th 2015 at 11.59pm. Tickets are valid for single entry to The Career Ideas Expo For Mums on 10th October 2015 only. See careerideasformums.com.au for more event details. Visit mamamag.com.au full terms and conditions.
MamaMag is published monthly for the mums of the Port Phillip area by Grizzle Design Pty Ltd. ABN: 26 042 138 550. PO Box 8018 Brighton East VIC 3187 Phone: 1300 771 446 Email: info@mamamag.com.au www.mamamag.com.au
5,000 copies are distributed monthly. Editor in Chief: Sarah Cavalier Port Phillip Editor: Kirsty Chick Sales and Marketing: Kate Thompson Design and Layout: Grizzle Design Like to contribute an article submission or products for Facebook giveaways? submissions@mamamag.com.au Like to advertise in our next month’s issue? info@mamamag.com.au or download our media kit from www.mamamag.com.au The opinions expressed herein are not necessarily those of the publishing staff. Reproduction in whole or part is prohibited without permission of the publishers. Health related articles are designed to be informative and educational. They are not intended to provide specific medical advice or replace one-on-one advice from your health practitioner.
BUDGET busting We have all heard the saying that it’s not how much you earn, it’s what you do with the money that counts. A well thought out budget will provide an insight into your financial position and allow you to prioritise your spending more wisely. Doing this will also give you a clear picture of how to set and achieve realistic financial goals. Most importantly a good budget will allow you to maintain peace of mind, have power over your money, and not be a victim of it. So what is budgeting about? Budgeting at its core is the plan you set to manage what you spend and what you save from what you earn. It’s the understanding of where your money goes and where it doesn’t go. No matter how much you earn, sticking to a budget is the foundation for strong short term and long term financial health. Whether we see this or not, being financially healthy is a critical foundation for a happy, peaceful and fulfilling personal and family life. If doing a budget and sticking to it is really that easy, why is it so much of a challenge for so many people? Well, let’s firstly look at what budgeting is not: Budgeting is not about missing out. It’s not about giving up something so that you can have something else. It’s not about “not having”. It’s not even about being constrained such that you don’t even get to enjoy life or live properly. When you think about budgeting it may bring up opinions of what you should and shouldn’t do with managing money, or feelings of anger or guilt as to how you came to this current situation you’re in. Just be aware that budgeting can be confronting and it’s okay to be emotional about it – money does crazy things to people.
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Budgeting, like anything requiring discipline and responsibility, can be a healthy balance between earning and spending. Just like a meme I saw, “Don’t Diet, Just Eat Healthy”, all you need to do is Spend Healthy. Budgeting is a life skill that we either learned as kids or as adults. Having worked with people on their personal budgets for the last six years I have seen many different personal finance issues. Attitude, or mindset, is by far the biggest contributor to people’s financial position. I have seen attitude contribute to a poor financial position for individuals with both low and high incomes (sometimes very high). If I could summarise the core belief that underpins all poor spending behaviour in this category I could put it in one acronym – FOMO, which stands for Fear Of Missing Out. It’s a person’s FOMO that drives spending habits. Low or high income, the reasons are all the same. “We really needed to go on that holiday … it’s been x years …” “I’m too tired to cook when I get home … so we need take-away” “All my son’s friends have that, so I didn’t want him to feel left out…” This is not to invalidate individual circumstances that in some cases are really dire but what I have seen is that more than 90% of the time the things that individuals overspend their money on are luxury items or nice-to-haves, and there’s no finance put aside for a rainy day. Sometimes a person may have the right attitude, and really wants to be better at managing their finances, but finds that any time they try they seem to fail at some point. I have seen many clients in this category where
“We really needed to go on that holiday, it’s been x years”
they have really tried and in some cases have tried for years only to remain stuck living pay to pay, or robbing Peter to pay Paul. Despite their best intentions they may get to the middle of the month and be hanging out for the next pay day or come up short of paying their bills. The critical knowledge here is how to effectively prioritise your money so that all of your basic needs are met first and so that you have enough left over for the important occasions or emergencies in life.
“I’m too tired to cook when I get home, so we need take-away” “All my son’s friends have that, so I didn’t want him to feel left out”
The skill & ability to execute a budget successfully lies in our philosophy. Our philosophy is to support people to achieve their personal financial goals and in the process allow them to develop the skills and habits to be financially self-sustainable. Having clarity over your numbers is the most powerful exercise you can do. A budget will create a holistic view of your expenses along with your income and will help set funds aside for future events. And when you view your financial life as a whole, the actions you’ll want to take in terms of addressing your financial goals will become clear. Sticking to a budget will take time and it’s important that you allow yourself some space and compassion to settle into a new routine on how you do money. We’ll guide you every step of the way. By Fay Chan - Financial Readiness and Budgeting Coach - Budgeting123 www.facebook.com/budgeting123 Email: fay@budgeting123.com
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Dream kingdom Creating a dream kingdom for your prince or princess, while maintaining a sense of order, can seem a little impossible. After all they are kids and they come with A LOT of stuff. So how do you create a sanctuary that excites the kids without being a constant nightmare for parents? Children are very sensitive to the environment around them and additionally find security in having a sense of order, knowing where to find and put away items. So with this in mind let’s get started. AAPO Accredited Expert Professional Organiser – Robyn Amott from Bless this Mess has the following tips to help you create a better bedroom environment for your kids and you.
Establish a vision for the room How do you want it to look, feel and function? Go with a slightly more mature theme that can grow with your child. It is a place to sleep, read and relax so keep any toys to a minimum and avoid arts and craft. We don’t want them to be overstimulated within this environment or they’ll never go to sleep.
Declutter Get the kids involved. Only keep items that are age and stage appropriate. Children grow out of and get bored with their stuff very quickly. If it doesn’t fit – donate it.
Remember less is more. Less stuff means more constructive play and less mess.
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Photos by Meagan Harding for Tini Trader For more gorgeous kid’s bedroom inspiration check out page 24!
Storage
Think vertically
Consider your existing storage first before splashing out the cash. The wardrobe is a great place to start. If it doesn’t suit your existing or long terms needs, consider having a cabinet maker re-design the internal space to accommodate clothing, toys and books. It can often be more cost effective than purchasing stand-alone units. I highly recommend hanging as many clothes as possible, removing the need for draws/shelving. The double hang rail from Howards Storage World is my top pick. Choose storage containers or baskets that are size appropriate to the space and contents and ensure you label them so everyone can clearly identify what lives where.
One simple way to make a room appear larger is by keeping items off the floor. Kids love to be surrounded by their stuff so why not display it? Wall mounted floating shelves are great for displaying all their treasures while keeping them out of reach. Use 3M hooks on the inside of doors for dressing gowns, hats, raincoats etc.
Furniture
Don’t have everything available to them to use all at the same time. Rotate items to help maintain interest and constructive play. Keep within the limits of the allocated spaces to ensure you don’t end up back at square one.
Keep it to a minimum. Furniture provides more flat surfaces on which stuff gets dumped while taking up valuable floor space, reducing the play area kids need. A bed, side table, bookshelf or chest of drawers is more than enough. Desks are a thing of the past. Choose classic pieces that will stand the test of time yet grow with your children and their needs. Consider multi-functional pieces. A bed with storage drawers/side table with drawers is perfect for underwear/socks/pyjamas and swimwear or blankets and spare linen.
Décor Inject your own child’s personality into the room. Choose a neutral or toned down colour palette to promote a place of calm. Let soft furnishings and accessories provide the splashes of colour. A bright floor mat or beanbag can provide a space for your child to play, make believe or just read and relax. Add photos or artwork that can be easily changed as they grow and interests change. Pinterest is a great place to find DIY inspiration that doesn’t have to cost a lot.
Functionality Consider the placement of items within the room and independent storage spaces. Keep like with like to easily identify where they can find and put away and encourage their independence. Use shoe boxes or drawer dividers to section internal drawers. Additionally, every kid needs an allsorts drawer – a place for all those random items. Place furniture around the walls of the room, again to maximise floor/play space. After all, we all need a dance floor.
Keepsakes For keepsake treasures I recommend having just one box in the top of their wardrobe for them to add to over time, as a representation of their life and achievements.
Minimise the mess
Maintenance Kids are kids and we can’t expect them to be perfect. Identifying obvious homes for all their stuff makes it simpler at pack up time. Instead of asking them to ‘pack up your room’- ask them to ‘put everything back in its home’. Establish the routine of packing up before dinner or at the end of the day.
Teaching kids the valuable lesson of learning to let go is also a fabulous life skill. De-clutter regularly. Gift giving times such as birthdays and Christmas are the perfect opportunity to donate clothing or toys that are no longer age or stage appropriate. Try the ‘one in one out rule’ for all items that enter the home. For everything new something must go. This allows us to maintain a sense of balance. Again, involve the kids in this process. So what are you waiting for? Go! Discover your inner child – draw on your child’s imagination, personality and creativity but ultimately keep it simple. Oh and don’t forget to get the kids involved – it is their room after all. For more information visit www.blessthismess.com.au, www.facebook.com/BlessthisMessOrganising or contact Robyn on 0407 757 466 99
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On the move Has your family outgrown your first home or is it time to move closer to a great school for your kids? There is a lot to think about when moving home; two of the most important are timing and money. Although not as exciting as finding the new home, it’s important to put time and effort into planning for such an important move, so you won’t have any nasty unexpected surprises along the way.
Timing The sale and purchase settlement dates will have a significant impact on your home loan and cashflow requirements.
Settle on the purchase first and the sale later: • This can be really expensive so it should be your last option. Or it might be something you have to use if you haven’t been able to sell your home in time. • You will require finance to bridge the gap between buying and selling. This “peak debt” equals your existing loan plus a new loan to cover the purchase price and costs of the new property. • This is expensive as you are charged interest on the whole peak debt for the bridging period.
Settle your sale first, then settle on the purchase of your new home:
• If your income isn’t enough to repay the monthly repayments on the peak debt, you will need bridging finance, with higher interest rates, bigger loan fees and extra government fees.
• You will know how much equity you have to purchase the new property.
• Bridging loans are not available from every lender, and the loan rules and costs can vary greatly.
• You may have to find temporary accommodation until you settle on the new home. • Possibly rent your existing property from the new owners for that period. • Sell with a long settlement term and buy with a short settlement term.
Or arrange for same day settlement for the sale and purchase: • It all happens at once. Your new loan will payout your old loan and there’s no waiting for any cheques to clear. • You must have a good conveyancer to manage this for you.
A mortgage broker can discuss how each of these could work for you, and plan the course of action that suits you, your financial situation and your life.
Money Know what you’ll spend for the actual move, and then you will have a good idea on how much you’ll have left to make your new house your home. Hopefully fun things like a trampoline in your new big backyard, a coffee machine for your new kitchen bench, or throwing a housewarming party to introduce yourself to your new neighbourhood.
Mortgage broking & advice A mortgage broker can help you with all the advice you need to purchase a home. A good mortgage broker will provide advice and assistance for free.
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Prepare your home for sale
Stamp duty
Weed and tidy the garden, give the inside a spring clean and don’t forget the windows! This costs nothing if you can do it yourself. Declutter. If you don’t have a friend with spare space, hire storage. Get a handyman to do all of those repairs and paint jobs that you’ve been putting off for years. Engage a home styling expert for anything from a one-off consultation to the full service; hiring furniture, artwork and accessories. The cost will vary from a few hundred to many thousands.
Stamp duty is payable to the government when you buy a property. The more you pay for the house, the higher the stamp duty will be. As a rough rule of thumb, use 5% of the purchase price.
Selling your home Real estate agents will charge you a percentage of the sale price plus advertising. Allow about 2% of your sale price.
Moving Moving costs will include removalists and insurance. Allow $2000–$5000. Less if you have a friend with a truck. Some utility companies will charge transfer fees or break fees. You may have an overlap of rent or loan interest if you need access to both houses for a period of time.
Loan fees
Building and pest inspections
Establishment fees vary between loans and lenders. Cost will be between $100 and $700.
Are you aware of any property defects that will cost you in the long run? Paying for professional inspection reports on your new home may be a worthwhile investment. Be prepared to spend $300-$700 for each report.
Written by Michele Mansfield of EquityVision, a local mortgage broker, who’s done it with her family and wants to help other local mums move to their family home too.
Building or contents insurance Insure your new home as soon as you’ve signed the contract to buy. This may be around $200 per month. I can offer you access to a unique 90 day free insurance offer.
www.equityvision.com.au email michele@equityvision.com.au Phone 9576 7255 Michele Mansfield is a credit representative (CR No. 399836) of BLSSA
Conveyancing Employ a professional conveyancer or solicitor to manage both the sale and purchase settlement day(s), and ensure the correct adjustments are made for your proportion of rates, water & taxes. Pop $1000-$2000 into your budget for both your sale and purchase.
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Buying a new home? We all know who the real decision maker is when it comes to buying the family home. The woman of the house of course! For the woman of the house, home is much more than a four letter word. Home is where the heart is. The problem is that most women are doing so many things, finding time to go out and search for the perfect home for their family is difficult. So when purchasing a new home, who are we up against? Real estate agents... real estate agents ARE professional negotiators. They are trained to negotiate the highest price for the seller. Real estate agents deal with selling property every day. Why would you consider negotiating against a professional negotiator? So who can help us? A buyers advocate (or buyers agent) is a licensed professional that specialises in searching for, inspecting, evaluating and negotiating the purchase of a home on behalf of the buyer. Sellers have their selling agent working for them (and no matter how nice they are…. they are still working for their seller!). By engaging a buyer advocacy service you can level the playing field. You have a professional to guide you through all of the various processes making sure that you are buying the right home – AND at the right price.
Their negotiation skills can save you thousands. With skilled questions and disciplined suggestions, they level the playing field for you. When buying a house, there’s more to negotiate than just price. Settlement terms, conditions and inclusions can be negotiated on your behalf. By using a professional negotiator, you’ll never be left wondering “Did I pay too much for this property?”. More than just a negotiator A buyers advocate will also help you search for properties and knows what to look for in each and every house. They know the tricks used when negotiating privately or bidding at auction. It’s easy to get hooked on a property when you are emotionally attached to it. A buyers advocate can remove all these pitfalls from your purchase process. Many people think they know all the “hidden” things to look for when buying a property. When inspecting a property, do you: • Understand what creaky floorboards really mean? • Know if the stumps rotten or sinking? • Look for signs of termites? • Know if the correct building permits have been supplied? • Identify is there are easements under the garage? • Know if the roof has been repainted of simply covered with spray paint? • Search for potential ventilation problems?
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“Most buyers advocates are designed to help second and third home buyers or property investors. On average, they charge a fee of around 2% of the purchase price of the home” said Julie from Buyers Home Base. This just didn’t sit right with her. She decided a low, flat fee would help home buyers more. “When I’m working for a buyer, my job is to secure their home for the lowest price possible. If I am working on a percentage, I get paid more if the buyer pays more – which clearly is a conflict of interest.” When buying a home, many people, with minimal negotiation skills or training, believe they can successfully negotiate against an expert real estate agent. Going it alone is a key reason first home buyers usually take longer to locate and purchase their home. Buyers quickly get lost trying to determine what the REAL price of the property is, where to look and how to powerfully enter negotiations. The only people they have available to gather information from are the selling agents. As lovely as they may be, real estate agents work for the seller, not the buyer. They are skilled negotiators who are trained to get every dollar out of the buyer. It’s an uneven playing field. Who do you have on YOUR side that will look out for your interests when you enter the negotiation ring?
Top three tips when planning to purchase a home: Understand that negotiation is a process Acknowledging the reality that negotiation is a two-way street can help make the process less daunting. Putting yourself in the seller’s shoes can help you work out how to best play your hand. For example, why is the vendor selling? And how can you present the case around your offer, and best time it for a successful outcome? Know the market What you’re willing to pay for the property is only part of the equation. Make sure you research current, comparable sale prices for similar homes in the same area before putting in an offer or bidding at auction. Be confident Put any fears and any negativity to the side. A confident, positive attitude is key in any kind of negotiation. If you’ve been searching for your dream home and are disheartened by not finding properties you like, tired of losing out at auctions or feel unhappy that your offers at private sales are being rejected – Buyers Home Base can help you. It’s time you moved into your ideal property sooner. Julie DeBondt-Barker - Buyers Home Base 1300 882 842 www.buyershomebase.com.au
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Parklife
MamaMag park of the month!
artplay playground Birrarung Marr, North bank of the Yarra River next to Federation Square The first thing you will notice here is the playground’s visual appeal. Brightly painted murals by kids frame the long wooden walkway and bridges of the main play structure. Some shade is available over one part of the play area and in the centre area which includes a couple of picnic tables. There’s a total of 4 slides (2 of which are steep, fast and not for the faint hearted!), apex large climbing net and a rock climbing wall for the little adventurers. The park best caters to pre-schoolers and above, however adventurous toddlers will find fun in the sandpit, hammock swings, running around the ramps and zipping down the slides. Three swings can provide some air time, including a Liberty swing for wheelchairs. There’s also lots to do surrounding the park, with some great large rocks to explore and a nearby hill that is begging to be rolled down!
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The location of this park is a major drawcard, with the creative arts centre for children and families, Artplay, next door. The centre offers stimulating workshops, performances and exhibitions each week. There are a number of free activities to jump in on, so be sure to check out the school holiday program and plan your day out. There’s also some great kids flicks showing at ACMI inside Fed Square and a Bunyips and Dragons Australian Children’s Book Illustrations exhibition running during school hols. The Little Veggie Patch Co, Pop Up Patch, adjacent to Fed Square, offers Scarecrow making classes for the kids and Edible gardening workshops for the budding green-thumbs. Public toilets with full change facilities are available at Fed Square.
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THINKIN G ABOU A BIGG ER HOM T E FOR YO UR FAM ILY? Here are some tips to
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Post-baby career change? Here’s an idea! Recent studies show that more and more mums are starting businesses rather than going back to work. New research from St George Bank shows that one in two Australian mums (43%) are motivated to start up a business in order to spend more time with their kids. Melbourne mum Danielle Ross Walls undertook an unexpected journey when she searched for a new career post children. After 15 years in the advertising industry, having two children made Danielle realise that corporate hours weren’t child friendly enough to create a sustainable lifestyle, so she went on a mission to find something flexible, that she was passionate about and contributed to the household income. When she couldn’t find it, she realised that other mums would be having the same difficulties too. After tirelessly looking for family friendly work options, doing event based study, volunteering and working at different festivals and speaking to mums in a variety of different situations, she came up with the idea of an expo specifically for mothers looking for viable work options. The Career Ideas for Mums Expo was born, aimed to inspire and guide other mums facing the same situation Danielle faced. “I was propelled into action when it became apparent to me that I was one of so many mums struggling with the desire for flexible work to fit around their families. It occurred to me that
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I could not only create a ‘flexible’ job for myself in creating this Expo, but make a difference and help other mums too.” The Career Ideas for Mums Expo, being held on Saturday 10th October 2015, at the Moonee Valley Racecourse, will feature an impressive line-up of speakers, including the event MC, Natural skin care pioneer Catherine Cervasio, founder of the celebrity endorsed Aromababy. The event has the backing of many family friendly businesses including Carman’s Kitchen, Fernwood Fitness and Learning, Business Mamas, Direct Selling Association of Australia, MamaMag and the Moonee Valley City Council. Danielle says, “I am working with the best to ensure the Expo offers a range of ideas for mums and to showcase family-friendly jobs – from running your own business to working with employers that offer flexible school hours.” Add to that 13 inspiring guest speakers and over 40 exhibitors who are all promoting family friendly career ideas. Mums will have access to information from a whole range of different specialists including educations providers, franchises, direct sellers and party plan demonstrators, recruiters, career and life coaches and small business support services. If one thing is for sure, it’s that the business and employment landscape is changing at a rapid rate and this Expo is the first step in ensuring that Australian families are afforded the opportunity to explore all the family friendly options available to them. For more information on the event and for ticket bookings please visit www.careerideasformums.com.au
so you want to become a mumpreneur... Love it or hate it, Mumpreneur as a word seems to be a fixture in our vocabulary. It has emerged as a term to help describe the growth in mums choosing to set up their own business rather than return to the conventional workplace. There are lots of reasons why some mums make this choice - they have had a great idea for a business, they cannot find employment on the terms they want, they like the idea of working at home in their PJs. Whatever your reasons might be for going down this path there are a few things to think about first.
have to think about the cost of marketing your business, whether it be building a website, business cards or advertising. And don’t forget if your child is not school age, you have to cover childcare costs too. All this will be against a backdrop of no or intermittent income in the early days, so make sure you draw up a financial plan that projects forward costs and income with sound assumptions of how long it will take till you break even. And then circle that date and buy a bottle of bubbles ready to open when you make it.
Time
Confidence
If your desire to slop around at home running your business in your jeans is driven out of a belief that you can work the hours you want to when you want the response to that is ‘yes’ and ‘no’. Yes you can definitely dictate set hours you won’t work, like 3pm when you pick up the kids from school. But no, because if you think setting up and running a business is a part-time job, it’s not. You are going to find yourself on it way more times than you even planned for. Evenings, weekends, cramming in half an hour first thing in the morning, these are realities for lots of mumpreneurs. So when you start down this path estimate how many hours a week you need to put in to grow your business, then double it, double it again and then think about when in a week you can do those hours.
A recurring theme around women in work, imagine being your own boss and having to bolster your confidence on your own daily. On the plus side you can give yourself a cracking year end review. On the down side when your confidence drops you can find yourself feeling very lonely. Our advice - find yourself some cheerleaders. When you start down the road of setting up your own business, identify someone who makes a good business mentor for you, someone who makes a good skill set coach for you and someone who makes a good martini for you. If you have a backing team behind you when you hit those road bumps they will help support you through them.
Money The reality is most businesses need money to get them going. Even if you are based at home, you will have some overheads. There are always extra costs regardless of which sector you work in. For example, if your business idea is about offering a service to others you
Of course the biggest thing of all is enjoy yourself! If you have a passion to work for yourself on an idea you have had for years then blooming well make sure you get a kick out of it every day. Lay yourself open to grow, develop and enjoy the journey. And yes you can wear jeans to work every day if you want to. By Coaching for Mums www.coaching4mums.com.au
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home beautiful Getting the best price for your home You only get one chance to make a great impression, so presenting your property in its best possible condition is paramount to achieving a great result. Many clients ask me to help them decide what improvements to carry out and how much to spend before selling. The simple answer is clean up, declutter, paint walls where needed and freshen up your garden with some colour. When you are considering undertaking any works to your home, always think “neutral”. Not everyone likes an orange feature wall or black bathroom tiles, but if you keep your backdrop neutral you can’t offend anyone. Start by making a room by room list. Note down items in each room that need to be removed, cleaned, repainted or re-arranged. You need to be extreme. Strip the areas back to bare bones. Make sure you pack away all personal photos, knick knacks and ornaments. If you decide to paint inside keep the colour white; Dulux’s White Chalk USA is a popular choice. If you’re painting outside look in magazines and at other houses in your area. Don’t be afraid to knock on doors and ask what colour they used; it’s a compliment to their good taste. Interior designers are also a great resource. For a small consulting fee, around $250, an interior designer can give you some
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terrific ideas about placement of furniture, colours and can help you with hiring furniture pieces if needed. I have seen first-hand how they transform homes with some simple changes or additions. Here are my best tips to getting your home ready to sell: Neutral tones are an ideal backdrop with pops of colour throughout. De-clutter the entire house including the garage. Remove ornaments and personal photographs, clutter on walls, the fridge and everywhere in between. Be a minimalist. Thoroughly clean the property inside and out. Pressure clean pathways and the front fence if needed, remove spider webs and clean all windows inside and out. Steam clean and deodorise the carpet. Clean down walls and re-paint areas where needed. Open up your windows by replacing heavy timber venetians or drapes with neutral coloured roller blinds. Re-stain/oil the decking. Add colour to the garden, add some internal plants and plan for fresh flowers each week during the campaign. Paint your old tired paling fences in charcoal. Like painting your nails, painting your fences will hide a lot of imperfections! Living in a minimalist home is not going to be easy. Some of my clients have even moved out of their homes for the duration of their sale campaigns. Just hang in there, a sale campaign is generally only for 4 weeks. It will be well worth it.
OPENING HOURS Mon - Wed: Thur - Fri: Sat: Sun:
8 - 7pm 8 - 8pm 9 - 6pm 10 - 5pm
Blowdry, cut, colour & style!
BOOK ONLINE charlieblowdry.com.au
88 Bay Street, Port Melbourne, VIC, 3207
BLOWDRY
$39
(03) 9646 3492 contact@charlieblowdry.com.au
EJM Photography Newborn and Maternity Port Melbourne location
0405 714 219
ejmphotography.com.au Live Local - Shop Local - and don’t forget to mention MamaMag!
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turn Auto off Owning a great digital camera, doesn’t make you a great photographer, just as owning an oven doesn’t make you a great chef. It just makes you the owner of a great camera – unless you know how to use it.
To illustrate my point – put your camera on Auto – then look at your menus, then turn to Manual and look at the menus again – do you notice how many more options you have?
Often the scenario goes like this: “I love taking photos, everyone says how good my photos are” or “I’ve just bought/been given a new SLR camera, my photos will be so much better now” or “not quite sure how to use this camera, I’ll just put it on auto” or “my photos are no better, I’ll just use my phone it’s easier”. Sound familiar?
Now imagine if you had the same camera, the same lens, but you the photographer selected the settings based on how YOU wanted the image to be represented. You want the focus to be on the subject, and you want to capture that gorgeous light that your eyes see. Do you see the difference?
Auto
When your camera is set on auto it is the camera that chooses all of your settings. All you are doing is holding a black box in front of a scene or subject and pushing a button. Even if you use the scene settings such as portrait or landscape, it is still an automatic setting.
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On any of the manual settings you can shoot to the ambient light • select the ISO to the weather eg: Cloudy day/open shade ISO400 • keep your shutter speed above 1/80 if you are shooting people: 1/160 for kids • if you want a blurry background – select a wide aperture: f5.6 or wider. • keep an eye on the exposure guide - keep it in the middle (0) for correct exposure. Next time you are out shooting, give it a go!
Manual
The first step to becoming a better photographer is as simple as using the camera you have to its full potential by understanding a few things. My very first tip is to turn your camera off the Auto setting or dreaded green square, turn the dial to Manual and learn how to take photos – not just snaps
n’s Childre
Days
FREE R Y FO ENTR EN 16 R CHILD DER. N U &
LIVE STAG SHO E WS
Children’s Days MON 21st - THU 24th SEPT Live Marvel Super Heroes.
MON 28th SEPT - THU 1st OCT
Live The Minions Musical Experience.
Y BTIU ETS K C INE L
ON
www.tulipfestival.com.au Tesselaar Tulip Farm, 357 Monbulk Rd, Silvan Vic 3795. OPEN 10AM TO 5PM DAILY. 23
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mama loving...
Shop these looks at tinitrader.com.au Photos by Meagan Harding
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lovely locals
Grove
St
ira Roa
d
1.
4 Park St
Prahran
St
Glen E
Bayview
Mulgrave
res Hood C
Helensl
Morrice
3
St
2 5 1
Garden
Orrong
Rd
St
ea Rd
we explore Glen Eira Road, Elsternwick
1. Earth mama - Little Green Footprints A beacon for all things organic and eco friendly, inside you’ll find products for newborns and toddlers (and mama bears!). Elissa is passionate about all things natural and her store specialises in modern cloth nappies. Free nappy workshops take place every Wednesday in-store at 10.30am (must pre-book). 272 Glen Eira Road www.littlegreenfootprints.com.au
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2. Lovely lunch - Glovers Station It’s a philosophy that works. “We like our food to be happy so you can be too.” Expect locally sourced organic and free-range (where possible) seasonal food. Herbs and leaves are mostly picked fresh from the veggie patch out the back. The space itself is impressive, once an old car workshop - the heritage Tudor-like facade remains. Inside is a lofty space of clean lines, factory windows and curved walls. Plenty of space to maneuver a pram. 258 Glen Eira Road www.gloversstation.com.au
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3. Early learning - Cocos ELC Cocos Early Learning Centre is a new, beautifully designed purpose-built childcare and kindergarten. The first thing we notice upon entry is the friendly welcome from Michelle at the front desk - and then the sense of community inside, as well as great facilities. As the centre is new, there are places available! If you’re looking for child care options, a tour here is well worth your time. 249 Glen Eira Road www.cocoselc.com.au
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4. Arty fix - Glaze It Studio Get crafty and creative without the bomb-like mess at home! It’s a drop in studio where you can choose your own ready-to-paint ceramics. We love the idea of painted handprints or footprints on plates to give as sweet personal gifts. Different items are separately priced and once your masterpiece is complete they will professionally glaze and fire your art work to be ready for collection in a week! 328a Glen Eira Road www.glazeit.com.au
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5. Retail therapy - Adore Homewares Besides good eats, this cute little strip of shops also has a homeware store filled with luxe textiles, gifts, jewelry, fashion and accessories. Spend a few moments getting lost in the colorful treasures. 266 Glen Eira Road www.adorehomewares.com.au 26
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Work from home as a
family day care educator.
We have families ready to start now!
Being a Windermere family day care educator means: • The flexibility of working from home • Hours to suit and fit in with your family needs • Marketing and recruitment assistance • Being fully supported to run your own business.
ECE0087
Right now we’re looking for people with a genuine interest and passion for caring for children and who want to run their own business. Training support provided.
To find out more, call Jade Kelso on 1300 946 337 for an Information Pack windermere.org.au
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Circus Skills Clean up for pre-schoolers: Cleaning up and doing chores 2. The Magician around the house develops Do some magic and eliminate all the waste. Empty the rubbish bins around the home, a children’s independence, and take out the trash. Another great heavy promotes responsibility, and work out; which involves some planning and increases a child’s positive self organising skills at the same time. esteem by teaching them to 3. The Clown pushing his car: work on a set goal. Did you know that “heavy work” helps children to focus and remain calm, and helps ease sensory needs? Many household chores and activities involve heavy work. Heavy work is an activity that uses your joints/muscles and puts pressure on your joints/muscles as you move, for example pushing furniture; carrying bags of groceries; carrying laundry; riding a bike. Kids love working towards a goal. To make the clean up more energetic and fun add music and/or a timer to the mix - see how fast cleaning up can be done before the song ends, or before the CD ends (if it’s a big clean up!). Set a timer and see how many toys or clothes can be collected; sorted and organised before the timer goes off. Set up a “Jar of circus tricks”: list all the chores that need to be done into categories as below and write these on coloured ping pong balls or icy pole sticks with a permanent marker; place the coloured balls/sticks into a glass jar and each child gets to pull a circus trick out of the jar each time a chore needs to be completed.
1. The Lion Tamer Take care of the food and clean water for the pets. This teaches children responsibility.
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Push the laundry basket/bucket/trolley around the house from room to room and collect or deliver clean and dirty laundry or shoes. This is a great heavy work task which also gives the gross motor skills a work out.
Other laundry tasks can include sorting clean clothes into piles for each family member ready for folding. What about sorting matching socks and tossing the balls into a basket “hoop shooting”. Folding and sorting socks and underwear teaches colour matching colours and counting. Another great heavy work task is loading and unloading the washing machine and passing washing that needs to be hung up to a grown up.
4. The Fairy Trapeze artist Dance around the house like a fairy trapeze artist and gather up all the dust with a feather duster in one hand, and an old damp sock on the other hand. Dampen the old sock with multi-purpose cleaner to gather the dust. Add a squeeze bottle or spray gun filled with general cleaner to wipe up bench tops; or window cleaner and paper towel to wipe down windows and mirrors; jump into the shower and spray this down too. Squeezing spray guns promotes finger and hand strength needed for fine motor skills. Why not water the household plants or veggie patch with a spray gun?
By Carmen Dodds - Occupational Therapist Paperkites and Rainbows OT
5. The Acrobat: Launch yourself under the covers to strip the bed of the linen and collect all the soiled towels that need replacing. Return clean linen and towels to the bedrooms/bathrooms ready for mum or dad to make the beds and hang the towels. Practice undoing buttons; zippers and press studs on linen – a fine motor skills needed for independence with dressing.
6. The Strongman: Kids will love walking around the house pretending to be the Strong man and picking up socks; shoes; lego pieces; blocks; dirty clothing; and soft toys with BBQ tongs. This will help do a big clean up, and promotes coordination and fine motor skills.
7. The Tightrope Walker: Use a scooter board or skateboard and shuffle along the house with your tummy on the scooter/skateboard and pick up toys, books, and household items that need to be put back into their correct space in the home. Pushing yourself on the scooter/skateboard promotes core strength, and upper body strength needed for desktop tasks such as writing or cutting.
8. The Ringmaster Tape a square onto the tiles/timber floors with masking tape. Let the child coordinate the sweeping like a ringmaster coordinates the circus by sweeping all the dust and grime into the square. A great task involving bilateral coordination.
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MAMA of the month After 11 years of working in advertising and most recently running an agency in Melbourne, Suzanne Acteson took a shot on a vision and passion that had been in her head for almost 10 years. Habitots was that vision; a unique retail, cafe, art studio, learning space in Albert Park. The kind of place that every family would love as their local. Ever the multi-tasking Mama, Suzanne took time out in between breast feeding newborn Charlie to answer our questions at 4.55am, before her other two boys Spencer (almost 8) and Oliver (4.5) stirred for another busy day ahead. What was most important in your vision for Habitots? The big vision for Habitots has been in my head for almost 10 years and bringing it together so all the parts work harmoniously, is the most important part of executing it well. The uniqueness of the business lies in each of its parts but also combining them under one business. The design of Habitots is so beautiful and functional. Had you embarked on anything like this before? When I worked at the agency I was a ‘suit’ so not in the creative side of the business. I felt a creative energy dying to get out and this was part of my motivation to start Habitots. I’ve always loved functional design and believed that there was a gap in the market for something functional yet beautiful for parents and kids. My husband and I have been serial renovators so we’ve been practicing on various houses over the past 10 years. Through this, I’ve been able to develop my design style and ‘play’ with various looks, aesthetics and spaces that work for kids and adults. We love the unique birthday parties that you’ve hosted, has there been a favourite so far? 30
We had a ‘Wild One’ first birthday that was beautifully decorated and styled by the birthday boy’s mum - that would have to be a favourite for decorations and style. I do love a simple party though so all the parties where the parents are easy-going and the kids have an amazing time would be my favourites. For Mamas yet to discover Habitots, what can they expect? At Habitots HQ in Albert Park, we have a beautiful retail store where we sell everything from toys to clothes to decor for kid’s rooms combined with a small cafe. Our seating is either in the sun out the back where we have a cubby house and sand pit or indoors in our play room. The play room and our art studio on the 2nd floor, are used for classes for kids during the week and all sorts of parties on weekends. Give us a little run down on the classes available at Habitots... We have about 20 classes a week in art, music and yoga for kids and are one of the only places in town to offer art for kids as little as 1 year old. One of our most popular classes, aptly called Messy Me, encourages kids to experience sensory play and take part in messy activities you wouldn’t want to try at home!
Are there any lessons you’ve learnt on your business journey so far that could help other inspiring mamas? If you have an idea, start working on it and stop just talking about it. Back yourself, do your research and jump in head first! What have you found most challenging to date? Cashflow for any new business is challenging and finding, managing and keeping good staff is always a hard one too. We have baristas, retail staff, teachers, students and party coordinators but I try to find people who will wear lots of hats and be ready to roll their sleeves up no matter what the task. How do you choose what products to stock at Habitots? We aim to have a good range of products across a number of key categories but I’m always on the lookout for new products and ones that you can’t find in the department stores. It gives people a reason to visit us and keep coming back for gifts or things for home. Any funny motherhood stories that you can share? I was speaking to my parents on Skype and explaining to my eldest (who was 3 at the time) about my dad cutting my hair as a child. Before I knew it, my laughs turned to screams as my son decided to do the same and cut a chunk of hair from the back of my head. All I heard was a SNIP and ahhhhh a chunk of hair was gone!! Your dream travel destination would be... A trip to Scandinavia and Northern Europe to see the sights but also explore the architecture and design centres of Sweden, Denmark, Holland and Germany. This would have to be a trip with a friend who would want to see all the things I do, unless I could convince my hubby to be patient with the retail therapy I’d be doing at the same time. And finally, what’s your guilty pleasure? I love soft cheeses, wine, Italian, French and Spanish food. Anything salted caramel and I’m yours! Habitots: www.habitots.com.au 146 Bridport, Albert Park. Ph 9686 1312 31
Growing food (and kids!) in the outdoor classroom Cotton socks come from animals and yoghurt grows on trees!i At least that’s what many Grade 6 kids told recent surveys. A majority of Aussie kids aged 6–17 can’t identify a leek (59%), a nectarine (58%) or a radish (53%). Less than half (49%) understand that most fruit and vegetables do not grow all year round.ii
Kitchen gardens improve literacy, numeracy, science, and biology, and of course, it’s the ideal place to learn about the natural world and sustainable living. Practical (and edible!) results provide a reward for learning, but a failed crop also provides a valuable opportunity for reflection.
But there are hopeful stories too. School kitchen gardens like the Stephanie Alexander Kitchen Garden Program (SAKGP) have launched many kids from the humble Home Economics scone into the culinary stratosphere of homemade pasta with roasted fennel, broad bean dip and chocolate beetroot muffins. A typical program teaches children to grow a kitchen garden then cook and share their produce in weekly lessons. In 2015 at least 835 schools and more than 100,000 children are benefitting from the SAKGP around Australia.
Hidden in every garden, beneath the veggie beds, orchard, compost heap and chook run, is a fertile ground for young minds; gardening grows both food and children.
The rapid propagation (pun intended!) of these programs is due not only to their success at embedding healthy exercise and eating habits, but also their ability to embrace virtually every subject in the curriculum. “How many zucchini plants do we need to supply the kitchen?” “How can we describe the texture of this dish?” “Which method grows better lettuce?” “What is the best approach to combat snails?” “How do we entice beneficial insects like ladybirds and parasitic wasp larvae to feed on aphids and other pests in our garden?”
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Here are some ideas to help the little person in your life develop their green thumb at home: Find a patch: Give your child their own plot. It could be a small garden bed, a large pot, or an old bathtub transformed into a fabulous upcycled wicking planter box! Add decorations and signage (and perhaps a homemade scarecrow?), and try to provide kid-sized tools like a small watering can and trowel. Add feathered: friends Nothing beats the discovery of freshly laid eggs, and backyard chickens are the ultimate productive pet – supplying genuine free range eggs and turning food scraps (and down-on-their-luck slugs) into a rich, free garden fertilizer. With a movable cage they become the almighty ‘chook tractor’ and can be put to work preparing the soil for your next vegetable crop. An especially good choice for kids are Silkie hens which are docile and tolerate lots of cuddles. ..or wiggly worms! If chickens aren’t an option then consider starting a worm farm. It’s easy to make one from recycled materials and kids love
to show off their wiggly pets. It’s a great way to produce free garden fertiliser and teach kids about recycling. Grow a vegetable rainbow: Did you know that tomatoes can be black, red, green, yellow and striped? Carrots can be white, purple, red, orange, or yellow? Cauliflower can also be green and purple? Purple mashed potatoes, traffic light tomato sandwiches and zombiegreen cauliflower can make eating 5 serves a day so much more exciting! An edible treasure hunt: Kids love a treasure hunt, and plants like beans, snow and sugarsnap peas, cherry tomatoes and zucchinis can be picked almost every day. Okay, so they might not compete with Easter eggs, but many kids will still appreciate a sweet cherry tomato or sugarsnap pea eaten straight from the garden. Plant a plum tree: Plums are one of the easiest fruit trees to grow and certainly among the most delicious. Plant a multi-grafted tree (two or more varieties on one plant!) to help with pollination and spread your harvest over a longer season. Start a berry patch: A berry patch is an edible wonderland for kids and adults alike! Just a few metres of berries trained along a fence will provide kilos of juicy, spray-free berries for healthy summer desserts. Cultivated blackberries like youngberries and boysenberries are the easiest to grow. Choose thornless varieties for painless picking. A garden in a jar: Even with no outdoor space it’s possible to grow a garden! Seeds like wheat, rye, mung beans, lentils and fenugreek don’t need soil or light to germinate, and take only a few days to grow into a mass of crunchy sprouts to add to your sandwiches or salad. You only need an old jar with holes in the lid to get started. Good advice can help to make your first gardening project a success. My Smart Garden is a free program that will help you grow healthy fruit and veg in your backyard, front garden, balcony or pots. Check out the resources on the My Smart Garden website, or you can attend a special workshop “Top 5 Vegies To Grow With Kids” on Tuesday 22nd September in Altona North. For more information, see www.mysmartgarden.org.au
By Kat Lavers, My Smart Garden i Bucklev & Hillman 2011 Food, fibre and the future: report on surveys of students’ and teachers’ knowledge and understanding of primary industries. ii Lonergan 2014 Woolworths Jamie’s collectables report.
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Moments captured The art of Newborn Photography is an art all of its own. Surely there could be no better model than a sleeping baby? They are the cutest subject of all. Everyone loves to look and gush over babies. We think of images by Anne Geddes and cute babies in whimsical settings who transform into fairies, flowers or tiny animals. As adorable as these images are, essentially when we want pictures of our babies, we want something that captures that incredible moment in time with OUR baby. Their tiny hands, tiny feet and all the tiny details that make up one perfect little person. Along with a list of technical skills that photographers possess to elevate images from a simple photograph to a true piece of art, newborn photographers must also be baby whisperers! Even at a few days old, babies know what they want. We spoke to Port Melbourne based photographer Emma Masterton of EJM Photography who specialises in newborn, kids and maternity photography to give us some hints and tips on capturing those precious first moments. The most important thing to remember is to book in your newborn session when you are pregnant. In the fog of those early few days with a newborn, photos may be far from your mind and before you know it, the window of opportunity has passed. Many photographers will also be booked out so there may not be a session available for you.
1. Window of opportunity Emma shoots newborns before 10 days old as the younger they are, the more sleepy and more “mold-able”. This means you get those cute curled up poses which make the newborn portraits so amazing and unique.
2. Session time A typical newborn session will take up to 3 hours duration. The photographer will be guided by the baby - it’s a practice in patience and precision. Newborns can be ticking time bombs, so you must work fast, but slowly, 34
almost unnoticed. Like a ninja! Ideally the shoot will take place in the morning when they are likely to be a more willing participant. It’s also a good idea to have them fed right before the session - full tummy often means happy bubba.
3. Things to consider The studio set up will ideally have plenty of natural light. If you have arranged a mobile shoot at your home, Emma discusses spaces that might work best (natural light being a major factor). Although professional lighting will be brought to your home, natural light is most ideal. Using flash can even stir a sleeping baby. And the number one rule of photography, or life in general, is never wake a sleeping baby! There will be an abundance of blankets and props, easily accessible at the studio. The studio will be warm to ensure maximum cosiness for the baby. Your session will be dictated depending on your desires and your end-purpose for the photos. Consider why you are getting these photos - is it to enlarge on a canvas and hang with pride on your wall, for birth announcement cards, or just general documentation of this moment in time? Discuss this with your photographer as this will help them prepare for the shoot before your arrival.
Organisation is key. As we said before. Baby whisperer. Photographic ninja! The photographer may do 4-5 different setups that may vary between props such as baskets, bowls, buckets or bean bags - again, depending on the wishes of the parents. Safety of the baby is paramount. Not all babies will do all posses, so the photographer will go with the flow of the baby. The baby will feed as many times as needed throughout the session, which means there is a good chance of ‘accidents’ happening on the photographer or props - this is quite common, so don’t worry, the photographer should be well prepared for this.
Emma’s top 5 tips for capturing newborns (for the budding photographers at home) 1. Naked photos are timeless. Use their natural curl to cover their privates 2. Wrap baby in a nice piece of material - keep colours neutral 3. Keep it simple - put them on their belly with head on hands on a couch 4. Get baby’s hands flat - this shows they are relaxed and content 5. If they are awake, follow their eyes so they are looking at the camera
Emma’s favourite pose: “Simple is best. My favourite pose is baby naked on their back with their legs curled up to their belly and hands flat on their chest.” The timeless shots are the closeups that revel in the details and showcase just how tiny the babies are. Little baby hands locked on to a parent’s finger, the tiny feet that hold all the world of promise of all the footsteps to come and those darn cute baby expressions, a yawn, a sleepy grin. The ones that only a baby can get away with! Before you know it, you will have navigated the first year of life with your baby. It will be time for the first birthday milestone - a celebration of life and survival! They will be running around the house, climbing on everything, exploring everything imaginable and the toddler stage will leave little sign of your baby. So much happens in that first year of life, a time of great change and development, of wonder and amazement. So capture the moments and treasure them forever. Emma Masterton www.ejmphotography.com.au
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mama can Cook! Impress Dad with these no-fuss recipes from Hello Table!
Steak Sandwich with Caramelised Onion Serves: 4 | Prep: 5 min | Cook: 8 min
Method:
Ingredients:
To make caramelised onions, heat oil in a saucepan over medium heat then add onions. Cook for 8 minutes stirring occasionally. They should not brown but just soften. Then add vinegar, salt and pepper. Remove from heat and stir in thyme leaves.
4 beef minute steaks 4 tablespoons oyster sauce 4 Turkish bread rolls 1 tablespoon mustard (optional) 225 g sliced beetroot, drained 2 tomatoes, sliced 4 handfuls lettuce or rocket leaves Caramelised onions: 2 tablespoons olive oil 3 red onions, sliced 1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar salt and pepper 2–3 thyme sprigs
If the steaks are too thick, put them between two sheets of plastic wrap and pound with the flat side of a meat mallet until they are about 5 mm thick. Marinate steaks in a bowl with oyster sauce while the barbecue heats. When hotplate is very hot, cook the steaks for 1 minute each side. Remove, cover and allow to rest while you cut the bread rolls in half and toast on the hotplate until golden. Remove from heat. Spread inside of each roll with mustard and add steak, caramelised onions, beetroot, tomatoes and lettuce or rocket.
Dad wont be able to resist this one! Feel free to add a slice of cheese or a cooked rasher of bacon if the troops are ravenous.
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Find this and more yummy recipes in Summer Table, by local mum Jodie Blight. Grab Dad a copy at www.hellotable.com.au
Pulled Pork Tacos Serves: 4 | Prep: 5 min | Cook: 5 min
Method:
Ingredients:
Preheat oven to 140°C. Remove tacos shells from packaging and wrap in foil. Warm in oven for 5 minutes while you prepare the remaining ingredients.
8 soft taco shells or tortillas 1 tablespoon olive oil 2 teaspoons ground cumin 2 teaspoons ground coriander 1 teaspoon smoked paprika ¼ teaspoon cayenne pepper ½ cup leftover roast pork juices 400 g cooked pulled pork ¼ iceberg lettuce, shredded Sour cream to serve 1 long red chilli, finely chopped Fresh Salsa: 2 tomatoes, finely diced, ½ red onion, finely chopped, 1 avocado, finely diced, 1 handful coriander, chopped, ½ lime, salt and pepper.
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Heat oil in a frying pan over medium–high heat, add spices and cook for a minute. Add leftover roast pork juices and pork, and cook for 3–4 minutes until the pork is heated through. If you don’t have enough juice left over from the roast, use orange juice or apple cider. To make fresh salsa, gently toss the tomato, onion, avocado, coriander leaves, juice of half a lime, salt and pepper in a bowl. Serve pork mixture in warmed tacos topped with lettuce, salsa, sour cream and chilli (optional).
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The father’s role Never underestimate the importance of father’s roles in our children’s lives I haven’t seen my father for 10 years now, and before that I hadn’t seen him (apart from the few times I ran into him in the pub) since I was eighteen years old. You see, my father is an alcoholic. He has a disease that took over his life and caused him to lose any real chance of having a healthy relationship with his three children. It’s sad but true—for most of my childhood and all of my adult life, I have been without a father figure in my life. It took me many years (and lots of therapy and vino) to come to terms with what happened to us as children. The anger and sadness is now a distant memory, but there were a few tough years there where I couldn’t even speak about my father. I am thrilled beyond belief to share that I did not follow that trend of women who go on to find themselves in a negative relationship because they are desperately trying to create the love that was lacking from their father. In fact I have managed to snag myself a man who couldn’t be any more different to the type of role model my father was. He is loving, kind, sensitive, thoughtful, and the most beautiful father any child could ever ask for. Most importantly though—he is present. Although I know that I am very fortunate to have the support of such a man, I have to confess there certainly are days when he simply drives me up the proverbial wall! It is a common discussion amongst us mothers about how our beloved other halves often send us to the brink of despair when it comes to the everyday organisation and discipline of our children. A good example of this is when we are heading
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out somewhere. My husband turns to me and says “I’m ready” and grabs the car keys! He rarely thinks about what our child might need or all of the things we need to take! On the other hand I know we need sunscreen and a jacket; we live in Melbourne and you never quite know how the weather will present itself throughout the day! I also know that as soon as we get into the car my daughter will ask for her water bottle. Or that you can NEVER have enough snacks, and that any type of food will save you from an emotional explosion when blood sugar levels seem to drop to all an all-time low at the most unpredictable times. Sometimes I just have to remind myself that he really just doesn’t know these things. I mean, how could he? I only know all of these things because I am with her the majority of the time, and ok I will admit that on the odd occasion I too have forgotten an essential item like a nappy or beloved cuddly toy. But for now—let’s just keep that between us! It has taken me a while, but I have finally come to the realisation that my beloved husband will NEVER do things the way I do—and you know what? I really don’t want him to! Some things to consider Have the utmost respect for their relationship: The relationship that he shares with our child is by far one of the most beautiful things in the world to me. Nothing makes my heart sing more than seeing them together. I am not jealous or threatened by it in any way. Their bond is unique and special to them. The love that they share is not more important than mine—it is just different.
It has taken me a while, but I have finally come to the realisation that my beloved husband will NEVER do things the way I do—and you know what? I really don’t want him to!
Make a conscious effort not to interfere: There are times when I have to consciously tell myself not to interfere or interrupt, and to let my husband do things his own way. I’m not going to lie—it is bloody difficult some days. It takes a lot of self-control on my behalf. However I am learning that he needs to feel empowered and know that he is doing a great job with our daughter, and he is—he just does it completely differently to me! I have to ignore the fact that almost every single time he takes her out alone they will go and have a strawberry milkshake and a hot dog. Another all-time guaranteed favourite in our house is a sausage in bread at the local Bunnings! I have stopped rolling my eyes and groaning that he does this, for a couple of reasons. Firstly, I am having much need time to myself, and secondly they are spending time together which is so important for their relationship. It is irrelevant what they do or what they eat. It is about the time they have together without me there. My husband never questions me on what I give our child to eat, or makes me feel like I have not had her best interests at heart. I try really hard not to do it to him. Give them praise: Fathers need to hear every now and then that they are doing a good job. They need to know that we trust them to take care of our children and keep them safe, without us breathing down their necks. If we want them to be more involved, we need to encourage and praise them to let them know how we feel.
We can teach them some of the things we know about our kids: Don’t always take for granted that our fellas know what to do. As I mentioned before, how can they know all of the ins and outs of taking care of our children if they are not there with them all of the time? Communicating with each other is so important. Share with them the things you know about your children, so that they are tuned in to their needs. In our house we now negotiate who is getting our child dressed (and yes I have had to resist the urge to get her changed if I don’t like the outfit he has chosen!) and who is packing her snack bag when we are getting ready to head out as a family. For a woman who has grown up without a father in her life, I am so grateful that my daughter will always grow up knowing that her Daddy spent time with her, and was present in her life. Hopefully he isn’t creating a hot dog and strawberry milk addiction in her; one that we will later have to pay for therapy to eradicate! I joke of course, but it is just so important that we acknowledge the importance of a father’s role in our children’s lives, and how much of an impact this will come to have on them in later life. We have to acknowledge the fact that they will NEVER do things the way we do – and that is ok! And besides more time for them together means more time alone for me. You won’t hear me complaining about that! Love Chrissie xx Chrissie Davies - Chaos to Calm Consultancy www.chaostocalmconsultancy.com
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how are you feeling, DAd? In many ways, new fathers appear to have it easy. They are spared the physical and emotional discomfort of pregnancy. They don’t endure the pain of childbirth. They also don’t spend the weeks and months of new fatherhood trying to get used to a body that has inextricably changed and no longer feels familiar. While men don’t have the physical signs to show for it, the transition to fatherhood is no less profound, exhilarating, and daunting. In my work with new parents, I am often reminded that the feelings and worries experienced by dads can be somewhat overlooked. What’s more, a lot of men have trouble talking about them.
What is my role? Some fathers question their roles in the early weeks and months, when typically mothers are the primary caregivers. As a new father it’s easy to feel a bit left out. However, research tells us that fathers’ relationships with their newborns make a significant impact right from birth. Actually, it starts long before birth, because babies begin to recognise their father’s voice at around 22 weeks of pregnancy. So when that bump starts to grow, it’s time to get talking. The most important thing dads can do for their newborns is to simply spend time with them – cuddling, rocking, talking, singing, and settling. Getting to know each other in a hands-on way is good for everyone. For inexperienced dads, on the job training is the best confidence and relationship builder of all. And the benefits for babies are vast. Several studies suggest the quality and quantity of baby-father involvement directly impacts language development and children’s sense of security growing up. There is also research showing that babies with strong attachments to their dads tend to have fewer behavioural problems later on. 42
With Father’s Day this month, we we were thrilled when Dr Karola Belton contaced us with an idea for an article helping new dads. Thanks for sharing Karola.
Not surprisingly, research also tells us that when mothers view their partners as competent - when they provide encouragement, and believe that parenting is a joint venture - men are more likely to be involved and value their roles as fathers. The key is mothers viewing their partners as competent. This is an issue many couples struggle with, and it comes up regularly in my work with new parents. Because mothers tend to spend more time with their newborns than their partners do, they clock up many more practice opportunities, and can feel that the way they have learnt to do things is the only way. So whether it’s changing nappies, settling a fussy baby, or managing the bath routine, dads can easily get left behind in the skill development stakes. An all too frequent result can be mums hovering on the sidelines offering unsolicited advice, or worse, taking over and doing it ‘properly’ themselves. The result? Dads can feel inadequate, resentful, and less motivated to try the next time. The impact of not letting dads learn on the job can be mums feeling unsupported.
Where has my relationship gone? Becoming parents calls for huge adjustments in relationships. Changes in roles, workloads and finances, not to mention the sheer exhaustion of caring for a baby. These pressures can impact even rock solid partnerships. Worries about how a baby may or has changed their relationship are among the most frequent concerns voiced to me by fathers. Some fathers experience feelings of helplessness as they watch their partners overwhelmed by tiredness, or having difficulties breastfeeding. Some women experience postnatal depression, and dads often feel at a loss as to how to ‘fix it’, feeling inadequate that they are not being able to make everything OK.
For other dads, it’s the loss of emotional connection that has been chipped away by the constant tension of tiredness and frayed patience. They can feel like they’ve lost their best friend amidst the unfamiliarity and daily grind early parenthood can bring. Some fathers talk about feeling in competition with their babies - for time, attention, and affection. Even while understanding their partner’s all-encompassing focus on their baby, dads can feel invisible or fearful that there’s not enough love to go around.
Some fathers question their roles in the early weeks and months, when typically mothers are the primary caregivers. As a new father it’s easy to feel a bit left out.
The reality of course, is that the birth of a baby can test even the strongest relationships. Even good relationships can stumble under the weight of it all. But the good news is that the overwhelming majority tend to bounce back again once everyone is getting more sleep, things settle down, and issues like sharing the workload are resolved. Remember, parenting is a marathon, not a sprint. It takes time and practice for both of you to adjust to being mum and dad, to learn the ropes, and to find space in there for each other. Here are some points to consider: • Communicate with each other. It’s a vital ingredient in sharing your worries and doubts, asking for support, and working as a team. • Practice empathy, which means being open to each other’s experiences and feelings, especially the ones that are different to yours. • Avoid competing about who has it tougher – nobody wins this one and it’s a certain resentment builder. • Seek professional support if worries become too big, anxiety or low mood become habitual states, or you need help adjusting to the change. Remember, dads experience postnatal depression and anxiety too. Dr Karola Belton is a clinical psychologist who specialises in perinatal psychology Director of The Clinical Psychology Group Suite 1, 324 South Road Hampton East 51 Bevan Street Albert Park Antenatal & Postnatal Psychology Network www.antenatalandpostnatalpsychology.com.au
Some fathers experience feelings of helplessness as they watch their partners overwhelmed by tiredness, or having difficulties breastfeeding. 43
closet cleANSE Cleanse your closet (and your soul) Are you the mum with the wardrobe jam packed with clothing AND YET you dread getting dressed every morning? I know - people think you are crazy! Mad! How can you have nothing to wear when your wardrobe is bursting at the seams, the shelves are over flowing and the drawers won’t shut? I get it. It’s a timeline of your former life. Clothes from when you went out with the girls, worked in an office, spent evenings in restaurants that didn’t start with a capital M. All those things that required a completely different wardrobe - all those clothes from when you lived a completely different life. But here’s the thing. There is nothing worse than standing in front of that wardrobe from the life you used to have, looking at clothes that are no longer practical. It’s a sad way to start the day and, who needs to be depressed first thing? There’s 24 hours for that! But there is hope! Imagine a world where you go to your wardrobe and know everything in there actually fits you, is something you will actually wear, and you can start your day feeling happy! l know that right now, you are muttering a ton of excuses as to why you can’t fix this but l have solutions; so let’s go through the list so you can stop the roadblock and start the cleanse.
1. Most of my clothes are worth a lot of money l can’t just throw them out. You don’t have too - you can sell them! And l don’t just mean through eBay; ain’t nobody got time for that! Using your local Buy, Swap and Sell site on Facebook is easy and takes very little time. Snap a pic with your phone, upload with some info and wait for a buyer!
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It’s free, easy and there’s no post office visits required. Or check out the local second-hand clothing markets held in your area. Share a stall with a friend and sell off those unwanted clothes. It will take a day of your time, but it’s the best way to get rid of a bulk of clothing and you’ll get to shop for some new pieces too, at bargain prices.
2. I might go back to work and I’ll need them. Unless you have definite plans to go back to work within the next 6 months (and l mean, you’ve got a start date set) then do not keep those clothes. Firstly, if you are a new mum, chances are they won’t fit anyway. And even if they do - clothes go out of style! Get rid of them and if it’s really a concern, put the money you make on them aside to buy yourself a new wardrobe if and when you need new work clothes. At the very least, they will fit you properly and be the current style.
3. One day I’ll lose weight and wear them again. For this one refer to #2 as well. While you may lose that weight, and l hope you do - don’t burden yourself with the guilt of looking at those two-sizes-too-small clothes day in, day out. Get rid of them and then you’ll have a reason to buy all new clothes when you drop that weight. A great incentive and a treat you will have earned!
4. I don’t have the time or energy to sort through everything
• Try each item on and ask these four all important questions:
- Does it fit?
- Do you still like it?
The relief you’ll feel each and every morning after your cleanse will be worth it - l promise. It doesn’t have to be done in a day. Here’s some hints and tips on getting the job done (now that I’ve convinced you, of course)
- Will you wear it?
- Have you worn in the last 12 months?
How to cleanse your closet
• If not, put it into one of the boxes.. Simple.
• Start small. Separate your closet into easy to manage sections that you can sort through in less than an hour. • Each day, pull a section out to sort. • Get yourself three boxes or large baskets for sorting. One will be items you think you’d like to sell. One will be items not worth selling, that you can donate to charity. The last will be items not worthy of either of the above and not wearable – bin these!
• If the answer is yes to at least three of these questions - put it back in your closet.
• Do a bit each day, or devote an evening to it, but once you start, commit to finish. Then enjoy your new and completely practical and wearable wardrobe. I promise you’ll find things you forgot you had, and feel fantastic! Good luck xx Rachael DiMauro is mum to two boys and local small business owner. She has her own handmade kids clothing label, Orcwood and is co-owner of the Far Fetched Designs Handmade gifts and homewares store, and the Melbourne Frock Swap Women’s Second-hand Clothing Market. Check them out at www.orcwood.bigcartel.com www.facebook.com/farfetcheddesigns www.melbournefrockswap.com
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