Issue17

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MANCHESTER’S STUDENT NEWSPAPER

Students May be First on Mars

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The Art of Schizophrenia

23rd FEB 2015/ ISSUE 16 FREE

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The Misinformation Age

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Discrimination plagues Russell Group - A report by University of Manchester and Leeds Beckett academics has shown that black and minority ethnic students are less likely to get into Russell Group universities, even with similar school results to their white counterparts António Rolo Duarte News Reporter Race inequality remains prevalent throughout all areas of British higher education, including admissions, staffing and employment, according to a new report by the Runnymede Trust, a London-based think tank.

Led by academics from the University of Manchester and Leeds Beckett University, the report found that black and minority ethnic (BME) students are less likely to get into the more prestigious institutions, notwithstanding their A-level results.

David Lammy MP, in his foreword for the Runnymede Trust report, said: “Whether in terms of admissions, attainment, employment, the student experience or indeed staffing, universities still have some way to go to ensure equality for ethnic minorities in Britain.

“So despite the lofty ideals of universities, they do no better—and are in fact doing worse—than many other institutions in British society when it comes to race equality.”

Omar Khan, Director of the Runnymede Trust, said: “Evidence that white British students with lower A-level results are more

likely to get into elite British universities than Asian students with higher A-level results suggests there is unconscious bias, if not positive discrimination, in favour of white university applicants in 2015.”

Among other results, the report found that 1.5 per cent of students who go to university are Black Caribbean but that in the prestigious Russell Group of research-intensive universities, only 0.5 per cent of them make it.

Likewise, Black African students make up 4.4 per cent of university students but only 2.2 per cent of Russell Group students are from that minority group.

Robie Shilliam, a Queen Mary University

students and 36 per cent of all Asian students.

But perhaps unsurprisingly, these are not the universities that politicians mention very often.”

Some scholars in the project have also pointed out that access to data about admissions processes is becoming increasingly restricted and thus providing a totally transparent view of the situation is becoming a harder task.

The Mancunion contacted all 24 universities in the Russell Group. Efforts to obtain comments the universities of Birmingham, Cambridge, Durham, Edinburgh, Exeter, Imperial College London, Leeds, London

of London academic who participated in the research, said: “Unless we subscribe to the idea that black people are inherently more stupid than white people we have to say that there is something going on structurally in these universities.

“If that’s the case then universities which are supposed to be provide a meritocratic basis for future life are actually reproducing existing inequalities and might actually be deepening them.”

Pam Tatlow, who participated in the Runnymede Trust’s research and is Chief Executive of Million+, a think tank, said, “a small number of universities, about 30 in total, educate 60 per cent of all black

School of Economics, Newcastle, Nottingham, Queen Mary London, Queen’s University Belfast, University College London, Warwick and York, which together make 15 of the 24 institutions in the group, were unsuccessful.

A spokesperson for Cardiff University, the only university in the group to recognise the existence of inequality in admissions, said: “The university recognises that there are still challenges to address in ensuring equality for BME applicants and students.”

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University of Birmingham Graduation. Photo: tompagenet @Flickr

02 : NEWS

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

Highlights P12 P13

Music: Interview: Prosumer

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Picture of the week - “Flipping good pancakes!”

This Pancake Day, the Students’ Union cooked and gave away free pancakes all day in the Students’ Union reception. Photo: The Mancunion

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Film: Sex on screen

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Arts: Whitworth Gallery Reopens

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The universities of Oxford, Glasgow and King’s College London rejected the problems pointed out by the report in the strongest terms, with a representative for the University of Oxford describing the inequality claims as “unsubstantiated,” a spokesman for the University of Glasgow citing its policy of “zero tolerance on all forms of discrimination” and a speaker for King’s College London saying that “we take the issue of fair access very seriously.”

The universities of Bristol, Liverpool, Sheffield and Southampton remitted all comments to the Russell Group head office.

Wendy Piatt, Director General of the Russell Group, said: “A crucial piece of the jigsaw is missing because the [Runnymede Trust’s] research takes no account of the entry requirements for the courses that students apply to. Many good students haven’t taken the subjects needed for entry and universities need students not only to have good grades, but grades in the right subjects for the course they want to apply for.”

A spokesperson for the University of Manchester said: “The University of Manchester has a commitment to addressing gaps in participation between equality groups through our Access Agreement. As part of this the university undertakes targeted outreach work for protected groups such as adult learners, BME groups, gender-targeted activities and disabled learners.

“Work to increase the participation of BME groups in higher education is co-ordinated through a dedicated post based at the university and working in partnership with the Race Relations Resource Centre—a Trust based within Manchester Central Library.”

In response to the story, Tessy Maritim, Diver-

sity Officer of the University of Manchester Students’ Union, said: “If this research doesn’t point clearly to the issue of structural racism, I don’t know what further evidence is needed. Racial inequality does not just begin at the admissions level; it permeates all levels of the university.”

She added further that “There’s also a shocking disparity in the number of professors who are black. I reiterate Robbie Shillam’s thoughts on this, “unless we subscribe to the idea that

Photo: Photo:pinomoscato@Flickr University of Manchester Students’ Union

Sub-Editors: Morgan Hollet, Gemma Sowerby, James Jackman & Charlotte Pangraz

Lifestyle: The Manchester Bucket List

Visit Our Website www.mancunion.com Facebook: The Mancunion Twitter: @TheMancunion Editor-in-chief : Aidan Gregory editor@mancunion.com Deputy Editor-in-chief : Charlie Spargo deputyeditor.mancunion@gmail.com Postal address: Univerity of Manchester Students’ Union, Oxford Road, Manchester, M13 9PR Phone 0161 275 2933

black people are inherently more stupid than white people we have to say that there is something going on structurally in these universities.”

The full report ‘Aiming Higher: Race, Inequality and Diversity in the Academy’ can be found at the Runnymede Trust website.

News Editors: Anna Phillips, Lauren Gorton, Jenny Sterne & Helen Chapman news@mancunion.com Science & Technology Editor: Andy van den Bent-Kelly

Food & Drink Editors: Elena Gibbs & Adam Fearn

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Sport Editors: Andrew Georgeson & Will Kelly Sports Reporter: Liam Kelly

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Opinion Editors: Morris Seifert & Marcus Johns opinion@mancunion.com Fashion Editors: Aimée Grant Cumberbatch & Gráinne Morrison Beauty Editor: Nikki Patel fashion.mancunion@gmail.com

Lifestyle Editors: Kitty Treverton Jones & Molly Allen mancunion.life@gmail.com

sport@mancunion.com Theatre Editor: Nicole Tamer theatre@mancunion.com Arts Editor: Holly Smith arts@mancunion.com Photography: Hannah Brierley If you have any comments or questions, or would like to contribute, please e-mail the Editor-in-chief or Deputy Editor-in-chief. The times of meetings are listed on our website.

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

NEWS : 03

Israeli Apartheid Week at the University of Manchester

From the 23rd to the 27th of February, Action Palestine is running events, stalls and talks to increase awareness of the conflict in Gaza Charlie Spargo Deputy Editor-in-chief Israeli Apartheid Week begins next week at the university (23rd – 27th of February), organised and run by Action Palestine, a secular society at the university concerned with raising awareness of the plight of Palestinians.

We spoke with Einass Bakhiet, Treasurer of Action Palestine, about the events and aims of the week ahead.

“Israeli Apartheid Week [raises] awareness of the Israeli occupation, and all the injustices and the suffering of the Palestinians,” she said.

“We want to educate students and raise awareness about Action Palestine, so people can get involved in our future events.

“In the week we have something exciting which we won’t disclose.” On Tuesday, the film ‘Five Broken Cameras’ will be shown in Club Academy from 6:30 – 8pm, a film about a Palestinian man who is protesting for the wall to be taken down.

“On Wednesday, we are holding a Palestinian Pub Quiz at Kro Bar [between 6 and 11pm], and on Friday we also have a talk by a really interesting activist called Danyah Jaber. She’s an activist in Palestine, and she’s talking about the importance of activism on campus.” She will be talking in the Catholic Chaplaincy from 5 – 7pm on Friday.

“Every day we’re trying to raise awareness, invoke some kind of change, [encouraging] students on campus to actually do something,” she said.

Israeli Apartheid Week is a series of events held internationally, among other things aiming to build support for the growing Boycott, Divestment,

and Sanctions (BDS) campaign, The overall aim is particularly to appeal to “those who don’t know or are misinformed, even those who are against the campaign, because it’s really important for them to understand. We’re often stigmatised as being anti-Semitic, and that’s not the case at all.

“The occupation is not even a political campaign.

It’s pure injustice, and so that’s why we don’t say we’re a political society, just one raising awareness so we can help those denied the right to their freedom and self-determination.

“In many ways it’s true that the conflict has political, economic, and psychological implications, but we’re not a society that has a political aim. Action Palestine is first and foremost a humanitarian and campaigning society.

“Our aim is to encourage a greater consciousness of the apartheid policies, and to encourage even small acts which can have a significant impact on the way people perceive the occupation.

“Throughout the whole week we’re giving the opportunity for people to get involved, with stalls every day. [You can] sell refreshments, you can do anything to raise awareness. The main aim is to get [the conflict] back on the student agenda.

“In the first semester, we pushed forward for a referendum for the twinning with Al-Najah [University, Palestine] to be strengthened. We hope that we get lots of people interested, and then they’ll help us to implement the policies.

“Israeli Apartheid Week allows us to raise greater awareness of the conflict, particularly since it is a global movement in solidarity with all those who promote genuine human equality.”

The Israeli West Bank Barrier. Photo: meexplore @Flickr

Oxford drinking society accused £9000 not worth it, say 81 per cent of students of “homophobic” behaviour The Abbotts, a secret black tie drinking society, was accused of tearing down LGBT+ pride flags from the walls of Corpus Christi JCR, and their behaviour has been described as “unacceptable” Charlie Spargo Deputy Editor-in-chief

Oxford Univeristy secret drinking society ‘The Abbotts’ has been accused of homophobic behaviour after tearing down LGBT+ flags from the walls of the Junior Common Room at Corpus Christie College.

Corpus Christie JCR was enraged at the “unacceptable” behaviour, condemning the society and allocating a further £75 for the purchase of new pride flags in the common room.

The private all-male, black tie drinking society, comprised primarily of privately-educated males with rightwing political views—according to the Oxford Student—had been initiating new members in a night of drinking and partying when the events occurred.

They have as yet refrained from publicly apologising to the JCR, and it is said that individual members have removed rainbow flags from the walls

of the JCR before. At least one graduate leader of the society holds a high-status business position.

The motion to condemn the society was passed overwhelmingly by the JCR, who described the actions of the society as “an unacceptable way to tell us to get back in the closet.”

They also agreed to set aside £1000 of charity funds for LGBT+ charities out of their £3000 fund.

OUSU LGBT+ Officer Jenny Walker described the actions of The Abbotts as “incredibly childish, [and] also highly offensive, and demonstrates a clear insensitivity to the identities and values of other students.

“The reaction of the JCR members in support of LGBTQ-identifying students is, however, a heartening sign that the vast majority of students at Oxford will not tolerate such behaviour in their university.”

February is LGBT+ History Month in the UK, and the university and city of

Manchester are hosting a variety of events across the month, celebrating the history and culture of the LGBT+ community.

Corpus Christi’s Equal Opportunities Officer, Jem Jones, told the Oxford Student, “Corpus JCR is a place where absolutely everybody should feel comfortable, welcome and safe. This ethos is not up for debate.

“The events of [the] night have been condemned by the rest of the JCR and the actions taken in in the JCR meeting on Sunday are indicative of the overwhelming majority of the JCR’s stance on the matter.

“I don’t care if it was meant as a joke, I don’t care if it wasn’t meant to cause offence; it is unacceptable and will not be tolerated in our JCR.”

Survey results are released as Labour’s shadow universities minister advocates free tertiary education António Rolo Duarte News Reporter

Four in five UK students value their degrees at lower than they are paying, according to a recent survey by Student Money Saver (SMS), an online news provider. The research also found that 15 per cent of students value their degree at the same amount and only four per cent value their degree at more than they are paying.

This information came out as the Labour Shadow Minister for Universities, Science and Skills, Liam Byrne, endorsed the principle of tertiary education being free of charge.

Speaking to an audience at King’s College London on the 15th February, Byrne said: “Obviously I would love free education. I would want it to be free just like the NHS, but I’m not going to make a promise that is not deliverable.”

Byrne’s statement on the issue indicates that he sees affordability rather than the principle that graduates should directly contribute as the main reason not to abolish tuition fees.

Results of the SMS survey show that students are still largely optimistic their increased earnings will more than cover their university costs, though 19 per cent believe they will not earn enough over their lifetime to cover their degree and nine per cent believe that their degree will not help them earn more money once joining the workforce.

The survey was conducted in November 2014 using a one thousand student sample. In general, it concluded that students are broadly dissatisfied with high fees and do not believe their degrees are good value for money.

Ed Miliband, Leader of the Labour Party, has recently stated his intention to lower the cap to £6000. As The Mancunion reported last week, this suggestion has been met with strong criticism from the academic community, with vice-chancellors from 20 leading English universities signing a letter to The Times stating that proposed cuts in tuition fees would cause substantial damage to the economy and students’ educations.

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Manchester student delegates travel to Bosnia to remember Srebrenica genocide University of Manchester students, Iman Nauman and Zainab Ahmed, travelled as delegates to Bosnia, as the 20th anniversary of the end of the war nears Aileen Rose Duffy News Reporter Two University of Manchester students, Iman Nauman and Zainab Ahmed, were lucky enough to be selected as delegates for the charity organisation ‘Remembering Srebrenica’ to explore the Bosnian Genocide and its impacts on the lives of those affected as the end of the war approaches its 20th anniversary.

‘Remembering Srebrenica’ is a British charity which focuses upon the events in the Bosnian town of Srebrenica, which was under the watch of the United Nations Protection Force during the Balkans Conflict. However in 1995 Serbian paramilitary units overran the town capturing its population. In the following days over 8000 Bosnian Muslim men and boys were murdered and buried in mass graves, whilst many women were deported and forced into ethnic cleansing rape camps.

The two students went to the Bosnian region where the conflict began in 1993 to take part in cultural understanding lessons. They also met some survivors of the genocide, including mothers of Srebrenica whose husbands and sons were lost in the massacres. Nauman and Ahmed described the meetings as ‘truly eye-opening’ yet also incredibly emotional due to the nature of their visit.

The students were fortunate enough to also visit the facilities of the International Commission on Missing Persons (ICMP) in Sarajevo and Tuzla to learn about the difficult, painstaking but ultimately successful work that continues to be done in the identification of victims buried in mass graves.

Here they were able to learn about and discuss the actions and aftermath of genocide, and the difficult process of reconciliation.

The programme aims to raise awareness of what it describes as “one of the worst atrocities committed on European soil since the Second World War.” They aim to teach lessons from the events in Bosnia between 1992 – 1995 and to draw upon this understanding to promote tolerance and community cohesion here within the UK. The girls are helping to raise awareness of the Srebrenica genocide by promoting the Memorial Day, held on the 11th of July each year.

During their visit with the organisation, Nauman and Ahmed learnt about the Srebrenica-Potočari Memorial Complex, a non-profit organisation that aims to build and maintain a complex in memory of the victims of the Srebrenica genocide, founded in May 2001.

Former US President Bill Clinton officially opened the memorial to the public in 2003.

Almost twenty years after the massacre, bodies

are still being recovered from mass grave sites around the country. Every year, thousands gather at the memorial centre on the 11th of July to bury what remains of their loved ones. In 2013, 409 newly identified bodies were interned at the annual memorial service.

Another feature of their learning experience was the Annual Peace March, or Mars Mira as it is more commonly known to the region. The Peace March is a commemorative walk in honour of the 15000

men who formed ‘The Column’ and embarked upon a perilous 63-mile walk from Srebrenica to Tuzla, in an attempt to escape Serbian persecution.

‘Remembering Srebrenica’ describe the threeday walk, starting on the 7th of July each year, as open to participants from all over the world to “march in protest over the outstanding arrests and prosecution for those responsible for the Srebrenica genocide and the numerous war crimes committed during the conflict in Bosnia.”

Photo: Remember Srebrenica@Facebook

Exeter students enraged by Standing for Students’ Union ‘impossible’ economics exam election nominations closes Economics students at Exeter University have complained that their exam was impossible and littered with spelling errors Elena Losavio News Reporter

An exam paper has been contested by economic students at the University of Exeter after spelling mistakes together with other errors were found within the paper. According to the students, the exam was also “un-reflective of course content”.

An online petition has been submitted by more than 200 students, demanding that the university examine the paper and conduct an investigation. In addition, they have asserted that during their course they did not receive an adequate preparation for the exam they had to take.

In a statement a representative of the students has said: “it is unacceptable that the university should be making such mistakes, considering the fact that [we] are actually paying £9000 tuition fees a year”.

About two-thirds of the students who took the exam have sent formal complaints to the university. However, the University of Exeter has claimed that strict rules are applied to all exam papers and that they are checked diligently.

A spokesman of the Exeter University declared that controls are undertaken ““internally and by an external examiner” during every exam. Different aspects are verified such as adequate level of questions compared to module topics and paper general accuracy.

He added further: “This procedure was correctly followed for this exam paper. The business school treats all complaints seriously, and we are

now working with students and staff regarding this issue.

“Our procedures are being accelerated in this instance to address the concerns raised by our students.”

Students however have said that is not the first time that such mistakes have happened and there was a similar situation in 2012 for the same module. At that time, the university resolved the issue by adjusting the marks that were previously released.

Some of the aggrieved students have argued that a similar solution ought to be adopted for for the present matter, considering that in January the average mark of the exam on economic principles and policy was very low, only 53 percent.

Students, who usually achieved high marks with an average of 80 percent, got only 40 percent. The lowest grades were around 10 percent.

Economic students sent their petitions individually to Exeter’s vice-chancellor, but they also wish to have the opportunity to take action as a group and arrange a meeting with senior managers from the university and the business school.

They hope that in the next few days this can be done.

A similar episode also took place at the University of Sheffield last month. With Third year students protesting for an exam on economics that they took in the last semester, which they described as “impossible”.

Over 44 individuals have nominated themselves to run as candidates for next years Student Union executive team, with a total of 50 potential candidates for the eight positions Lauren Gorton News Editor

campus!

“These elections matter because these students will be deciding everything from what the

Standing for next year’s student executive

Union building should look like, to what goes on

team closed on the 19th February, with over 44

inside it, including what acts should be playing

individual students applying to stand for the

at Pangaea each term. With a £6 million Union

eight executive positions. Whilst this is four

renovation project next year, there’s never been

fewer candidates in comparison to last year, an

a better time to vote!”

unprecedented number of current executive

Speaking further on the issue of student vot-

members have chosen to re-run for election,

ing apathy and the role for each candidate in en-

with six of the eight current members re-stand-

couraging the student body to vote, the Election

ing.

Administrator stated: “All academic research

The breakdown of candidates also demon-

shows that a face-to-face conversation, even as

strates that a number of the candidates fall

short as 10 seconds, is the most effective way to

within the BME category at exactly 40 per cent.

persuade someone to vote.”

Further, out of all the candidates, just short of

Voting for the Student Executive Team begins

half of the potentials are women, with both the

on the 6th of March and will close on the 12th

Women’s Officer role and the Campaigns and

of March. The listing of all candidates for each

Citizenship Officer role being solely applied for

officer position can be found on the Students’

by female candidates.

Union website.

On speaking on the number of candidates this year and the importance of the student exec team, the Election Administrator for the Students’ Union said: “The Exec Team elections are the chance for every student to have their say on how their Students’ Union should be run.

“This year we have an exciting group of over 40 candidates who are passionate about what they want the Union to look like next year.

They will be campaigning hard over the coming weeks for your vote, so look out for them in society meetings and lecture halls throughout

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Socialist Students run for election Around 20 University of Manchester and Manchester Metropolitan students run for Manchester City Council and Parliament for Trade Unionist and Socialist Coalition Roberta Rofman Features Editor The Trade Union and Socialist Coalition (TUSC) will be fielding council and MP candidates in Manchester during the upcoming elections as part of the biggest left of labour challenge to the British political establishment in over 50 years. Prospective parliamentary candidates will be making a challenge for the Manchester Central, Wythenshawe and Sale East, and Gorton parliamentary seats, as well as contesting council seats in every ward in the city and many more across Greater Manchester Around twenty of these prospective council candidates are students at Manchester’s two universities. These students are taking a stand against the agenda of all the mainstream political parties, and those parties in the ascendency, which are committed only in slightly varying degrees to austerity.

They argue that the ‘big three’ parties have overseen a twenty year period of decline in public services for young people; including funding cuts to sure start centres and youth organisations, to the continuation of the young person’s wage which can be as little as £3.79 an hour. The TUSC have further attacked other political parties arguing that the Green party has also carried out likewise cuts to services within its Brighton council.

The TUSC have stated that students in Manchester are finding an alternative to voting within the big three category in the TUSC. Students are doing this on the basis of a no cuts agenda for both students and workers, with the understanding that austerity

doesn’t just impact a person on one level but limits their chances from birth, through education and beyond.

TUSC claims to be the only party with a strong program of Socialist ideas that is prepared to oppose any cut within the social sector, with Manchester student being involved in work to scrap zero hour contracts and fighting to raise the minimum wage to £10/hour. With the support of the trade’s council and the Bakers and allied food workers union.

Further stances of the TUSC include continuing to oppose tuition fees and to support student and academics in their fight against the marketization and privatisation of universities, and putting forward the demand to bring public transport back into the public sector through re-nationalisation to create an integrated network of transport across the city that is affordable for everyone.

Zoe Brunswick, prospective council candidate for the Fallowfield ward said: “Today’s students are the first generation paying for university education and the majority of us will graduate with at least £37,000 worth of debt.

“In addition we’re subject to uncapped rents which often cost the entirety of our loan, if not more. And when we try to speak out? We’re met with police brutality – as demonstrated by the horrendous, violent conduct of police officers at demonstrations at UCL, Birmingham and Warwick Universities last year.

“Last Term myself and many other members of TUSC took a leading role in Manchester’s cops off campus demonstrations to protest against the political policing of students as they fight against the

escalating corporatisation of education.

“TUSC represents a real and direct challenge to the politics of the establishment parties; we refuse to recognise austerity and cuts as part-and-parcel of life in modern Britain, and do not accept the scapegoating used by the establishment to place the blame onto the sections of British society that suffer the most from their attacks.

“TUSC opposes all cuts to public services and is disgusted at labour’s callous attitude towards the wholesale impoverishment of entire communities.

We need a party for the millions, not for the millionaires.

“Manchester City Council has carried out equally as many cuts to public services as the most committed of Tory-led councils, and if re-elected it

Photo: Bridget Russell

Row over Orange Grove development proposals

Elena Losavio NewsReporter

The Orange Grove, situated in the heart of the Fallowfield area, will be demolished and converted into flats. This building, located in Wilmslow Road, was previously a student pub, but it was closed over two years ago and has since remained vacant.

Around 35 flats and commercial spaces are planned to be developed on the ground floor. Those supporting the development have asserted that it will be a key element for the development of the area by the construction of a ‘high quality building’.

However, this project has raised concerns within the Fallowfield community and residents have complained that this will significantly increase the student population in the area. They are concerned that incidents of antisocial behaviour might increase, as they believe it did after Mayfield Court was developed into student accommodation.

The committee backing the development have responded that students are not the target of the devel-

opment. They added: “[We] acknowledge that there are concerns about the proposal. However, [we] consider these to have been addressed.”

Chris Paul, Withington councillor, asserted that this development may probably cause more risks for cyclists, considering the consequences that higher traffic could have on the nearby Fallowfield Loop.

He further added that last year a cyclist died after an

Photo: raver_mikey@Flickr

accident on Wilbraham Road.

He said: “This authority has got a very poor record, in my view, of enforcing proper arrangements around building sites for cyclists and pedestrians, including some of our own developments.”

After mentioning the development project of Whitworth Art Gallery as a positive model, he said: “I would urge the committee to consider requiring there to be

plans to continue with austerity for years to come: in Manchester a vote for labour is no different to a vote for the Tories.

“TUSC is putting out a call to all students, trade unionists, activists and everyone who is dissatisfied with establishment politics, cuts and attacks on working people to support them in the up-coming general and council elections by joining us in launching our campaign”.

The TUSC campaign launch will take place Tuesday the 24th of February, at the Methodist Central Hall on Oldham Street, M1 1JQ between 6-8pm. All students are welcome and in the meantime can find out more information on the TUSC website: www.tusc.org.uk

some very clear arrangements during construction to ensure pedestrians and cyclists are safeguarded.”

Withington MP John Leech claimed that Fallowfield needs more accommodation for families and not new flats. Concerning the decision taken by the council to approve the plan, he said: “This is another example of Labour’s one party state in Manchester ignoring the legitimate concerns of local residents.”

Whitworth Art Gallery reopens for business After more than two years of redevelopment, Whitworth Art Gallery is finally open to the public Joe Astill News Reporter Over £15 million has been spent on the recent renovations to the University of Manchester’s Whitworth Art Gallery. The developments, funded by the Heritage Lottery fund, the University of Manchester and Arts Council England, were tested over the Valentine’s weekend when the ‘gallery in the park’ reopened to the public.

On Valentine’s Day the grand reopening was greeted by queues of people and railings overflowing with locked up bicycles.

Overall the venue attracted almost 18000 people over the Valentine’s weekend, which is more than the gallery usually receives within a month.

Pioneered by the London-based architecture studio, MUMA, the revamp features massively expanded gallery areas, a new learning studio, a study centre, and an art garden and cafe.

The expansion of Whitworth can now enable the gallery to expand on its 55000-strong collection of artworks, with two extended wings on the back of the building branching out into Whitworth Park. There is also a glass promenade connecting the wings which will be used to house large-scale sculptural works.

The classic Edwardian architecture of the building has been preserved with the extensions being made of the same red brick

as the original building. At the same time, the building still manages to pull off the modern look with its selective use of large glass windows and stainless steel.

Popular exhibits include Cornelia Parker’s Cold Dark Matter: An Exploded View, showing a mass of chaotically suspended objects, and Cai Guo-Qiang’s Unmanned Nature, detailing the best of his works that make use of gunpowder.

The new and improved gallery promises to be more popular than it has ever been before and in a statement on its website has said: “Despite its ambition and change, the Whitworth is also a gallery that has retained a sense of the personal, the intimate and the playful. It is a place that its visitors love, and feel that they own. For them and for us, the Whitworth is simply the gallery in the park, one of the most remarkable galleries in the north.”

For anyone interested in visiting the gallery, Whitworth is open to the public for free from 10am to 5pm daily, except on Thursdays where the opening time is extended until 9pm. More information in regards to the gallery, including its current exhibitions and projects, can be found on their website at: www.whitworth.manchester.ac.uk/

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Students to go to Mars to read books and leave behind “legacies” Andy van den Bent-Kelly Science & Technology Editor

legacy.

“Everyone will remember who were the first four people who stepped onto Mars.”

Cost is a major concern. NASA, who are themselves exploring the possibility of facilitating human exploration of Mars with their planned Orion missions, estimate that the project will cost closer to $100 billion.

A study by researchers Massachusetts Institute of Technology found that any manned mission to Mars would result in the death of all the crew members within 68 days, due to the lack of protection from solar radiation. It should also be noted that only 50 per cent of all previous missions to Mars have

succeeded.

But despite the widespread scepticism, Earnshaw remains optimistic about Mars One. “It’s a very ambitious mission and requires lots of things going right for humans to leave the planet,” she explained.

“But this project is encouraging other people to talk about the wider implications.

“It’s definitely feasible. Space travel is risky but at the same time, there is a time scale in place.”

The three students are joined on the shortlist by Alison Rigby, 35, a science laboratory technician from Kent and Clare Weedon, 27, a systems integration manager living in Surrey. This means that an entirely British crew could be chosen

Mars is currently only inhabited by spacecraft and robots, but humans could join them within the next ten years. Photo: NASA Solar System Exploration @Flickr

20 15

“Is there life on Mars?”

For centuries people have speculated about whether the planet is capable of hosting life.

But assuming that Mars One goes ahead as planned, we will have an answer in ten years: Yes, there is life. Well, human life anyway.

Three British students have made the final shortlist of 100 volunteers for the four available places on board Mars One, which is due to depart on a oneway mission to the Red Planet in 2024.

Maggie Lieu, a 24-year-old astrophysics student at the University of Birmingham, 21-year-old Oxford physicist Ryan MacDonald and Hannah Earnshaw, a 23-year-old PhD student in astronomy at Durham University are among five Brits who could potentially become the first humans to set foot on Mars.

More than 200,000 people originally applied for a place on the mission, which aims to establish a human colony on the Martian surface within the next decade. This was whittled down to just 660 last year, all of whom undertook online interviews with the project’s medical adviser.

Out of those 660 people, a final shortlist of 50 men and 50 women from across the globe was drawn up and revealed recently.

The aim is to send 24 people to the planet to establish the settlement, starting with an initial group of four. They will be preceded by several unmanned missions, which will identify the best place to set up camp. Habitation modules and life

support systems will be sent to the Red Planet prior to the astronauts’ arrival.

The controversial Dutch project was first announced in 2011 and is expected to cost $6 billion.

It is a not-for-profit organisation led by entrepreneur Bas Lansdorp, who financed everything himself until 2013.

The day-to-day life of everyone in the settlement will be filmed as part of a global reality television series, which will enable everyone on Earth to witness the progress of the colonisers.

Hannah Earnshaw said, “Human space exploration has always interested me so the opportunity to be one of the people involved was really appealing. The future of humanity is in space.”

Maggie Lieu was equally as enthusiastic, stating, “It’s always been my dream to explore space and advance space science so being given the opportunity to one of the first ever people to physically land on that piece of space rock would be a dream come true.”

Despite its hugely exciting nature, the project hasn’t been met with universal acclaim. Multiple aspects of it seem overly ambitious and there are many individuals and institutions that have their doubts about its feasibility.

Before making the shortlist, Ryan MacDonald admitted that he shared people’s concerns that the mission would never end up happening. However, he insisted that he is still desperate for it to go ahead and stated his reasons for wanting to permanently emigrate to Mars.

“The most important thing to do in life is to leave a legacy,” he said. “A lot of people do that by having a child, having a family. For me this would be my

Have you received inspirational teaching or outstanding support from University staff this year?

Why not nominate your lecturer, graduate teaching assistant or support staff for a Manchester Teaching Award?

Guidance and nomination forms available at www.manchesterstudentsunion.com/teachingawards

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

NEWS : 07

Manchester medical students learn from “Instagram for Doctors”

A Canadian doctor has created an app, dubbed as ‘Instagram for Doctors’ that allows medical students to view millions of medical images from their smartphones.

Patrick Anyadi Science & Technology Reporter

A Canadian doctor has created an app, dubbed as an ‘Instagram for Doctors’, which is helping Manchester medical students with their studies.

The creator of “Figure 1”, Dr. Joshua Landy, is a critical care specialist at the Scarborough Hospital in Toronto.

Along with his co-founders Gregory Levey and Richard Penner, his goal was to create a “network where healthcare professionals could share images and create discussions.”

The idea for the app came in 2012 after Dr. Landy spent time as a visiting scholar at Stanford University. He studied how medical students and doctors were using their smartphones and found that image sharing for the purposes of education was commonplace. However, these images were shared without protecting patients’ privacy or indexing them in a meaningful way, despite their tremendous potential.

The aim of the resulting app is to change the status quo of “having an image sink down to the bottom of your inbox”.

SW2015.Manc.Half.pdf 1 19/02/2015 Following numerous fundraising efforts, Figure 1 was launched in 2013.

The app currently has over 150,000 users

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and has continued to grow rapidly since its inception. So far it has been launched in 38 different countries. 30% of U.S. medical students now use it and within the University of Manchester, Figure 1 is beginning to make waves.

For second year medical student Kajen Suresparan, Figure 1 has helped him learn more about the brain, “Figure 1 has allowed me to explore my interest in neurosurgery in greater depth. It’s amazing to be able to scroll through CT scans on my mobile phone”.

Figure 1 allows users to upload images of rare and/or textbook cases of illnesses and share them with medical professionals and students from around the world. Verified users can interact with each other via the comments section and there is also the option to ‘follow’ images of interest or other users, much like any other social network. This enables students and younger healthcare professionals to learn from the expertise of those who are more experienced.

One of the concerns raised by students about the app was regarding the confidentiality of images, which is a core 10:31 principle of good medical practice.

However, in an interview with The Mancunion, Dr. Landy outlined in

great detail the built-in tools that allow users to crop and edit their images, acknowledging just how important this issue is.

Specialised face blocking software automatically removes the pixels from images that could identify a patient from their face. Also, images are evaluated by analysts before they are authorised for publication in the app.

Although the current focus for Figure 1 is education and information dissemination, the app shows great potential as a diagnostic tool. It can allow doctors to crowdsource for complex or uncommon diagnoses and it will be exciting to see how the app develops in future.

For students with the desire to innovate in the medical field, Dr. Landy first advises “to stay in school kids. Think about a problem that you and the other people in your field face. If you’ve got an idea and you’re dedicated to solving that problem you will find success.”

Figure 1 is free to download on the App Store or Google Play.

The app protects patients rights to privacy automatically, by blurring out identifying features. Photo: Figure One

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ISSUE 16 / 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

Reassembling the Self: the art of Schizophrenia Schizophrenia has been described as one of the most misunderstood disorders. In ‘Reassembling the Self’, Susan Aldworth looks to diminish the stigma that schizophrenia has and to depict perceptions and experiences of it through art.

Roberta Rofman Features Editor

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usan Aldworth, collaborating with works by Camille Ormston and Kevin Mitchinson who both have schizophrenia, created the ‘Reassembling the Self’ exhibit.

Combining art, science, psychiatry and individual histories, Aldworth has created works that explore the different perceptions and experiences of an individual with schizophrenia.

Aldworth studied Philosophy at Nottingham University and printmaking at Sir John Cass in London. She has been described as an experimental printmaker and filmmaker, producing Memoires, a short film about schizophrenia.

Kevin Mitchinson suffered from auditory hallucinations, anxiety, depression and episodes of paranoia. The voices were described as: ‘Continually present, at times shouting and bullying, and always critical of his every thought and action’.

He stated that art has helped him reach his current level of recovery, where he is in control of his voices and is rarely paranoid. His confidence also remains at a high.

Camille Ormston has painted seriously since 1996 and investigates herself as the subject of the works. Art has also aided Camille’s recovery and improved her confidence.

Professor Anya Hurlbert at Newcastle University has described the exhibition as being “at heart about human identity, the sense of self and how it holds itself together.”

She further stated that: “From the human mind comes human identity, a constant subject of Susan Aldworth’s work” and

“In people with schizophrenia, the brain rhythms go awry, perceptions disintegrate, and so—it is thought— does the sense of self.”

There are many misconceptions about the condition of schizophrenia.

It is usually confused with other condition such as multiple personality disorder. At the core, the NHS describe it as: “a mental health condition that causes a range of different psychological symptoms, including: • Hallucinations – hearing or seeing things that do not exist • Delusions – unusual beliefs not based on reality which often contradict the evidence • Muddled thoughts based on the hallucinations or delusions • Changes in behaviour” Treatments include antipsychotic medication, talking treatments such as cognitive behavioural therapy, social support and community activities to encourage recovery such as art therapy.

There is a stigma attached to schizophrenia, as mentioned previously, the idea that it is a ‘split personality disorder’ or that sufferers are violent. On the contrary, the majority of people suffering with schizophrenia are not violent. Professor Anya Hulbert said: “The diagnosis of schizophrenia often still elicits fear and condemnation at the worst, pity and protectiveness at best.”

She further stated that other disorders such as depression or bipolar disorder have been somewhat normalised in society, whereas schizophrenia has not.

This is likely due to it being less common and the misunderstanding of symptoms as being dangerous.

She said: “Everyone knows what it feels like to be depressed. But what does it

Photo: susanaldworth.com

feel like to be ‘schizophrenic’?”

A lot of work went into achieving this project, including interviewing people with schizophrenia, studying electrophysiology, visual psychophysics etc. and discussing treatments with psychiatrists.

Why did you decide to do it?

For the last 15 years, my work as an artist has focused on what it means to be human. I studied Philosophy at university before I studied Fine Art, and I always had an interest in the relationship between the mind and the body.

There was a moment in 1999, when I found myself on a hospital operating table having a brain scan—I could see into the workings of my brain, real time, on a monitor as they scanned it whilst I was still conscious. I was watching myself think.

It was an epiphany!

This brain landscape was worth exploring as an artist. And also, the imagery of the scans was uniquely beautiful. It left me wondering, what is human consciousness? How is it summoned up from the three pounds or so of flesh of the brain?

Since then I have spent my time considering what it is to be human. I have worked with scientists, doctors and people

with Alzheimer’s, Schizophrenia, Epilepsy, and Down’s Syndrome.

I have talked to philosophers and psychologists. I work across traditional academic disciplines.

All these different narratives have an influence on my work.

Contemporary scanning techniques give us access to the internal living body, with imagery that is both beautiful and vital.

Neuroscience is beginning to unravel how the brain works and presenting to us with extraordinary digital images. I would be crazy to ignore this new profound visual language.

Neuroscience is a profoundly visual science—and the scans of the brain provide me, as an artist, with a new visual link between the external surface of the body and the subjective experience of being that person. The relationship between mind and body.

But at the heart of my work, is an interest in what it is to be me, and more interesting, what it is to be someone else. I am not a scientist. I am not trying to solve the hard problem of human consciousness. Neither is my work simply illustrative – I am not trying to represent the physical brain or explain science. I am working with contemporary scanning

technologies, and tapping into a contemporary interest or belief in neuroscience as the latest creed to offer a rational explanation of the human condition. My work is simply about what it is to be human… I work across academic disciplines to explore and examine ideas. But in the end my work is art.

It asks questions but never tries to proffer solutions.

Reassembling the Self was a portraiture and self-portraiture project exploring schizophrenia which I developed during my time as Artist in Residence at the Institute of Neuroscience at Newcastle University from 20102013. I worked with basic scientists, clinicians and two artists with a schizophrenia diagnosis exploring some of the complex narratives of schizophrenia. It was a difficult project.

Schizophrenia is poorly understood and the main purpose of the project was to address some of the misconceptions and stigma around the condition. Initially I had planned to make portraits of Camille and Kevin, two artists with a schizophrenia diagnosis who I was working with on the project.

But their self-portraits were more powerful and authentic than any representation I would make. I

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decided to include their extraordinary work in the exhibition. I made word portraits of Kevin and Camille, ‘Dreaming Voices 1 and 2’ which were made up from their own words when describing the ‘internal voices that they hear.

Has it been something you’ve worked on for quite a while?

I started making the work for the exhibition in 2011. I was lucky enough to work with the legendary lithographer Stanley Jones who invited me to work with him on the 12 lithographs you see in Reassembling the Self.

These are aggressive and difficult works. The reassembled anatomy is a metaphor for the pain and difficulty of having schizophrenia when you can feel that your self is being stolen away from you by your own anatomy. The relationship between the physical brain and your sense of self in this context is very complicated.

Did you find it hard or easy to depict it in an artistic way?

It was very challenging. I didn’t want to make any statement myself about what schizophrenia might or might not be. I wanted to make work which invited the audience to experience an alienation from their sense of Self.

So, the Reassembling the Self lithographs are formal portraits of Schizophrenia itself. The idea is simple. A body attacks itself— and this is represented by a reassembled anatomy where huge ear bones and a hip bone become the shoulders’ bones, where a large pair of ears form an arse.

A distorted anatomy as a visual equivalent of distortions to ones sense of self, which can happen in schizophrenia.

These prints also show the extraordinary technical versatility of lithography as a form. These are plate lithographs. Seamlessly I was able to mix digital photography, ancient anatomical illustrations with drawn marks and a painterly quality. Colour is subtle. I can’t think of any other technique which would have let me do this.

I also used eye tracking technology to make a self-portrait called Self 2. It was an interesting experiment to draw with one’s eyes rather than one’s hand. The process exposed the way one looks at things rather than the way one draws. It also might tell us something about the way an individual perceives the world.

Do you think there is a general misconception about people with schizophrenia?

People with schizophrenia are often treated appallingly in the press. There is a huge amount of ignorance and mythology around the condition. This ‘bad press’ can lead to people feeling socially isolated. But like all conditions, it is on a spectrum… and not very different from being me or being you.

What do you hope the ‘Reassembling the Self’ project will do to Schizophrenia, if anything?

I hope that the exhibition and the project will open up wider discussion about the experience of schizophrenia. And maybe help to explode some of the stigma surrounding the condition. This is the third time we have shown this exhibition in the UK, and each time

Feature : 09

it has attracted an interested and diverse audience.

There is a symposium about schizophrenia organized by Manchester University, open to all, at Waterside Arts Centre on May the 13th. We hope to bring together under one roof many different people, from varied backgrounds, academic and non-academic, people affected by and dealing with schizophrenia including clinicians, mental health professionals, artists and interested people to explore many aspects of living with, and treating schizophrenia. It promises to be a very special day. All welcome but you need to register.

Did the use of different materials (e.g. etching and lithograph) intend on sending out a different message in your art? Same with the use of colour contrasts e.g. black and white.

As I described, I worked with Stanley Jones at the Curwen Studio to make the lithographs. The etchings were commissioned by the Arts Council last year to add to the exhibition as it toured the UK. I wanted to make work which explored the fragility of human identity. How a stroke, or a brain injury or illness can fundamentally change who we are. I am a hairdresser’s daughter, and have always been fascinated by hair.

Hair is about lots of lines working together on your head. It is also very near to the brain—hair grows from the skull.

I wanted to use human hair to draw with, and I worked with master printer Nigel Oxley to make The Entangled Self suite of etchings you can see in the exhibition. The etchings continue my interest in making work printing with marks taken directly from the human body in an exploration of human identity and portraiture. Hair produces extremely fragile lines— at the limit of what you can capture on an etching plate. These prints are a reflection on how fragile our sense of who we are really is.

Self Portrait: Kevin Mitchinson. Photo: boltoncvs.org.uk

In the film Memoirs, how did you go about making it and why did you use and what was the significance of the dancing figures?

My film ‘Memoirs’ was based on an extraordinary account by Daniel Paul Schreber in 1895 of his descent into psychosis.

“Can there be any prospect more terrible for a human being… than the prospect of losing one’s reason?”

Daniel Paul Schreber, Memoirs of My Nervous Illness 1895.

I worked with the animator and composer Barney Quinton.

We collage together archive film footage from the Welcome Film Library, working from the images that Schreber described in his book. Schreber reveals how he “considered himself chosen to redeem the world, and to restore to it the lost state of Blessedness. This, however, he could only do by first being transformed from a man into a woman...” and the dancing figures represent his wish to become a woman.

Reassembling the Self is a free exhibit at the Waterside Arts Centre in Sale and is running until Saturday the 30th of May 2015.

Mandala: Camille Ormston. Photo: boltoncvs.org.uk

Opinion Editors’ Foreword The Misinformation Age ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

10

Marcus Johns Morris Seifert

Valentines day has come and gone. We have all lost our loveydoveyness and it’s time to get back to some real comment.

Is the Internet making you stupid? Is Russell Brand a potent activist or just a gypsy who got lost in the BBC offices? Is your view of women still akin to that of a 1920s stock broker? Is firearm possession in America one of those articles that should have got thrown away with the tea?

Read on for answers to all of these questions and more.

Let us know your reactions, opinions, criticisms and your heart’s desires by tweeting us at: @MancunionOp.

Why you should appreciate philosophy Morris Seifert Editor If I said, “Do you like Bacon?”, what would you think I’m asking you?

Would you think I’m asking if you liked thinly sliced cured pork? Or would you think I’m asking you whether you liked Francis Bacon, the 16th Century philosopher whose legacy (amongst far more) includes founding an entire school of Philosophy – empiricism, founding a methodology of experimentation that would form the basis of our modern scientific method and theorizing what the perfect state would be and how to create it. All whilst balancing a political career so successful he saw himself promoted to Lord Chancellor, the second highest office in the land.

Now I’m not arguing bacon isn’t great, it is. But Bacon is greater. Philosophy has become dry, it has become unfashionable, and it is seen as a wacky bastardization of science (which we all now have such adamant faith in). Why would you ask questions that have no answer when you can ask ones that do?

But what we have forgotten is that science is a mere branch of philosophy. The scientific method was pioneered by philosophers. The ways we are taught to reason and think from the cradle to the grave – philosophers. The reason we no longer live in superstitious fear (or anticipation) of the next life – philosophers.

The revolutions and enlightenments that have thrust us forward into an era which whether you like it or not; is the most productive and advanced in human history – philosophers.

And not only has the human collective conscious gained much from philosophy, but you can personally.

Imagine if every question of life you have ever asked I told you there was an answer to. Not the answer you want or the answer you were looking for, but if you look hard and persistently enough – an answer.

But I know what you’re saying, and I agree: reading Spinoza or Kant is a bit like forcing your eyes open with cocktail sticks and squeezing lemon juice into them. You won’t read philosophers because they’re hard, and they are. So don’t read philosophers. They didn’t write for you or me anyway. Most didn’t even write in English. So go find some interesting philosophy and find a good secondary source on it, find someone’s whose toiled over it and taken the time to simmer its wisdom down.

Go and read something by Will Durant. Go and do that; I promise you won’t regret it.

@MancunionOp

Criticality is crucial in an age where the stupid and the brilliant compete equally for your attention

Charlie Spargo Deputy Editor-in-chief Last weekend the Internet was flooded with the news of the death of Tony Hart, the creator of the Morph animation, who died from ill health, aged 83. People posted links to his Guardian obituary and thousands remembered fondly his legacy and expressed their sadness at his passing.

There was only one problem.

Tony Hart died from ill health, aged 83, six years ago. It apparently began with the absent-minded mistake of a 33-year-old from Kent, whose wife had seen it on Facebook, and so tweeted he out “RIP Tony Hart.”

He found out half an hour later and corrected the mistake, but by then it was far too late.

Even public figures such as Frank Turner and Conservative candidate James Cleverly tweeted about it, and eventually the character Morph himself stepped in to say “Tony sadly died in 2009.”

This is the Internet, and we can recognise that insignificant events such as this can get wildly out of hand extremely quickly. But has the Internet made us naïve?

These days, celebrities are rumoured to have died on almost a monthly basis. In the past few years alone, rumours of the deaths of Jon Bon Jovi, Eddie Murphy, Matt Damon, and scores more have torn through Twitter feeds, causing reactions verging on hysteria.

Often these are intentional hoaxes, unlike the Tony Hart incident, but the reach of this false information and the speed it spreads goes to show how dramatically the In-

The internet is like scrabble; there are many letters and even more combinations, but lots of them are bullshit.

Photo: Ewa Rozkosz @ Flickr

ternet has changed our means of communication.

Spoof news websites like the Onion and the Daily Mash are now extremely important in this age of instant information.

It’s important not to doubt the power and influence of satirical news sources. In 2012 the Onion story ‘Planned Parenthood Opens $8 Billion Abortionplex’ caused outrage on Facebook. Thousands believed the headline and were enraged, sharing the link and proclaiming just how barbaric it was, including a US Congressman.

While these sites first and foremost provide entertainment and satire, I’m sure that a large proportion of us have fallen foul of reacting to a fake headline before realising our mistake. What they actually serve to do is encourage us to source our information reliably and check its accuracy.

I don’t think many of us are quite

used to the sheer quantity of information available online, and this clearly leads to many believing things that a quick Google search would unequivocally show up as false.

The speed of looking information up doesn’t help either; in the past, finding information in a book or physical newspaper made it more difficult to make drastic mistakes as people do now.

Being still a young resource, the Web holds an odd level of control over people’s beliefs. It seems very easy to believe something you read once on the Internet, even when you’re aware how unreliable it can be.

Many would gladly believe a crackpot anti-vaccine conspiracist writing a blog post riddled with grammatical errors over mountains of dry and somewhat impenetrable scientific research into the benefits of vaccinating children.

The Internet is huge—in fact, unimaginably vast. There are at least 1.2 billion websites—that is individual, unique hostnames—so the amount of information available at the click of a button is practically unfathomable, and bound to trip us up now and again. It has skyrocketed, and continues to at an exponential rate. It has become far more than the sum of its constituent parts.

Perhaps we’re not used to its potential yet, or perhaps we’ve created a sort of Tower of Babel and are doomed to failure.

Do outpourings of sadness for actually-not-dead celebrities show how insincere we’ve become? In short, yes. The responses to every ‘death’ number in the tens of thousands, showing it’s not just a vast amount of information we can access, but a vast audience.

We’d rather be seen to be sympathetic to a potential few than

heartless to potential millions, and the Facebook-era culture of earning coveted ‘popularity points’ serves only to fuel this.

Would you exaggerate a story, or even tell a white lie, for a lot of retweets? I don’t doubt you probably would—I know I would.

The Internet, ubiquitous of the forward-surging modern age, also highlights people’s primal fears and desires. We are terrified of being left behind or disliked, and reduced to working for more friends, likes retweets, upvotes, and evernewer versions of Internet currency.

But, in reality they mean nothing.

Not that there’s anything wrong with the mass approval method of entertainment, a fair and effective way of finding the best content, for the record.

What the Internet can offer, on the other hand, is a diamond mine of information.

Of course, much of it will be lies. Much of it will be Chinesewhispers-style misinterpretation; much of it will be useless. But never before in human history has so much collective knowledge been available so incredibly conveniently to so many.

Social media may have turned us into popularity-craving, disingenuous, joke-recycling automata, but the Web itself is a resource of which we have barely scratched the surface. The possibilities of creation and innovation are, truly, endless.

So no, the Internet has not made us stupid, but at the moment the human race is like toddlers with an encyclopaedia. Give us time and we will thrive.

Brand, the barnet that matters He might talk like a character from a Charles Dickens novel but he is worth listening to

Lauren Wills Contributor Russell Brand encourages us to talk about things that matter.

I must admit, I cringed a little when Russell Brand appeared on BBC Question Time talking about politics. It didn’t seem right, and I thought (and still think, to an extent) that what he had to say lacked substance in regards to democracy and voting. However, politics is something that young people on the whole don’t want to engage with, and the idea prevails that political discussion is best left to more intelligent people who know what they’re talking about. Russell Brand is changing these static ideologies about participation in politics, and in my opinion, this can only be a good thing.

In fact, I sometimes worry about our generation when it seems we’re more interested in Miley Cyrus’ VMA performance than what’s really going on in the world that’s truly affecting people’s lives.

As I said, at first I was disappointed that Brand came along selling his new “Revolution” and encouraged people to abstain from voting. I still disagree with him and actually think that using one’s vote is integral to a functioning democracy.

Thus immediately I jumped on the Brand-hating bandwagon, but what I was really doing is

tuning out because honestly, I didn’t want to take political advice from a comedian.

There may have been a worry his political emergence would create a “Russell Brand wore army pants and flip-flops, so I wore army pants and flip-flops” situation whereby the entire 18-30s population would be hiding away when it comes to the general election later this year.

Realistically, this is not the case.

It’s just refreshing to hear from someone who’s a bit different.

I think many of us have a bad attitude towards Russell Brand because he doesn’t fit the mould of what your typical individual in an influential position should look like. It’s been drummed into us for years, subconsciously if not anything, that judges, ministers and Members of Parliament have to be smart, white, middle class and male with not a blip on their records. It’s got to the point where we don’t want to learn from or trust anyone who doesn’t fit this stereotype with important societal issues.

I know Russell Brand isn’t exactly “one of us” in terms of wealth, but I do think he has a greater understanding of the needs of people in the UK over many people in Parliament.

Lord Fink’s statement last week serves as the perfect example. He commented that he took “vanilla tax avoidance” measures and that “everyone avoids tax at some level.” What he failed to see was that most of

us don’t have the desire or opportunity to avoid paying tax, partially because HMRC are like a dog with a bone when it comes to collecting every last penny with the general public.

This bizarre statement showed just how out of touch with the real world those in power can be. No, we don’t all avoid paying tax and no, we don’t all have the opportunity to do so even if we did want to.

With this in mind, I quite like it now when Brand sits there amongst politicians with his unbrushed, bird’s nest hair and sleeve of tattoos. He is incredibly respectful of other people’s opinions in interviews and is clearly well-informed on a wide range of subjects. In particular, after the Charlie Hebdo attacks, he showed a sensitivity which not many people did on asking questions about religion and how personal actions can affect and marginalise others. He also raised issues about both terrorism and the causes of terrorism.

He discussed acts of the government in general on his video blog, and how we should question and be free to criticise their decisions.

He often talks about subjects that we leave to the experts.

Young people especially are disengaged from world affairs and politics, with celebrity gossip being more interesting (and perhaps more ‘cool’ to talk about.) However, I hope Brand encourages young people that

we’re moving on from days where everyone in power has to look and talk in a certain way, and that we can all participate in democracy through political discussion.

I think the fear was people would blindly follow his opinions because he had a large long-standing fan-base he could influence, but in reality I think it’s opened up a more general debate about the government and world-affairs, especially

amongst young people.

Celebrities stand in a unique position of influence in society.

They especially affect the way young people live in a number of ways; their appearance, manners, fashion-sense, music preferences and general interests.

Brand has started to use his influence to engage people in healthy discussion and debate which in my opinion can only be a positive thing.

Russell wants you, and it’s not only women he’s directing that rally at now

Photo: Duncan C @ Flickr

Does that guy pointing his finger annoy you?

Opinion

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Is pride ‘out’ for the count?

‘Pride mentality’ needs to infiltrate everyday life if it is to have an impact on awareness, openness, and equality Mitch Maidstone Contributor For many, LGBT+ and otherwise, Pride is often a wonderful, rainbow-infused blur. It injects extra equality, open-mindedness, and (best of all) glitter into our lives. Seems obvious, but it’s a golden opportunity to circle back to why exactly we are so damn proud of our (often marginalised) identities in the first place. However, like every other day, the bright lights of Pride do, of course, eventually fade.

This wouldn’t be an issue if there were extensive networks of support available, as and when needed.

Fantastic strides forward have been made by the likes of Manchester’s own LGB Foundation’s fund— and awareness—raising efforts. But one invaluable support network in one reasonably-sized city does not equality make. Frankly, it’s the endemic lack of support, outside the likes of the Foundation, which leaves Pride looking a little hollow. Its own one day a year is easily overshadowed by the tide of oppression it limply tries to stand against.

In the same sobering vein, Stonewall’s 2012 The School Report found that 55 per cent of LGBT children and teens had experienced direct homophobic bullying. Pair this with a staggering 96 per cent exposed to homophobic language, such as “dyke” or “poof,” and there is obviously still a long way to go. Pride has a definite place, and, I would argue, it shines brightest in the sustained, everyday acts of authenticity that lead others, especially young people, by an open and energetic example.

What is happening at the moment, in contrast, is a serious case of a flash-in-the-pan attitude.

Throw enough fireworks and rainbows (however fabulous) at people, and they will, apparently, be blinded enough to forget about the rest of the year.

Having a full life, fair enough, but when that life includes throwaway oppression and a widespread, blatant disregard for key parts of LGBT+ identity, the oddity of Pride, strewn somewhere in the midst of summer, just doesn’t cut it on its own.

Pride could, clearly, use an assist. The Minister for Education Nicky Morgan’s announcement of £2 million to help schools combat homophobic bullying in October 2014 seemed, therefore, to be good news—wonderful, even—except that throwing short-term investment at a systemic and potentially life-altering problem will not make it vanish into

Why can’t we be this happy everyday of the year rather than

Photo: Man Alive! @ Flickr

thin air. It’s true, however, that monetary support is a great step in the right direction, especially in an area as crucial as educating young people about the damage bullying can cause. But if this isn’t sustained, Pride will remain the fantastic introduction to the LGBT+ community that many will never have; it will come too late to repair the damage done, and too late to undo the emotional wounds inflicted.

Equally well-intentioned, but next to useless in the long run, is the plan to open a school for only LGBT pupils. What seems an innovative solution will not (surprise, surprise) magically eradicate bullying. The commendable drive to celebrate diversity and the enduring need for community, embodied in Pride are therefore left somewhat dampened and one-sided. All bark and no bite, Manchester, therefore, even with its Queer as Folk pedigree, is part and parcel of this oppression.

What seems an almost utopian expression of each

slice of queerness on Pride day, quickly comes across as niche, risqué, or otherwise outlandish on any other.

What’s more, without a strong backdrop of support, measures like opening an exclusive school for LGBT kids serve to do exactly that: exclude people who may well have otherwise become allies and, you know, decent human beings. It’s exactly this ‘us’ and ‘them’ mentality that Pride is standing against. Yet now, instead of acting as a point of unity, Pride remains a gesture towards a future where visibility for all is the norm. But it’s one that many have not, and will not, be able to enjoy, because that fuzzy feeling of belonging does not yet translate into everyday life.

Pride is supposed to break down these barriers, and offer a bright, accessible beacon for the uninitiated. But, instead, as with the planned LGBTexclusive school, the likes of Pride and Canal Street only serve to increasingly ghettoise LGBT people.

Having a safe space, a ‘hub’ for open expression is a brilliant, inclusive idea.

But this freedom of expression belongs also beyond the confines of a particular festival, school, or area.

And that won’t happen while the support does not exist outside of it, however attractive and wellintentioned the ideas might be.

However, bashing and blaming Pride itself for these problems would only be a symptom of the oppression highlighted here. And guess what? Any LGBT person turning in on themselves—through no fault of their own—only serves to unceremoniously shake the sparkle out of an environment that desperately needs it. Because, let’s face it, glitter is vibrancy and life.

And Pride has a hell of a lot of it. But that needs to be shared around more equally because, however you identify, who would want to live in a world without it?

Radicalisation: is there a solution?

In order to keep us safe from the ever-looming threat of terror in the UK, our government has channelled its ignorance and hypocrisy into the counter-terrorism strategies of ‘Prevent’, which has gained much response and discussion.

‘Prevent’ is stigmatising the Muslim youth of Britain as potential threats to the country, and patronising everyone with its wilful ignorance of history and denial of the current state of affairs. Done in the name of ‘protecting the UK against terrorism’, Prevent is a response to the fundamentalist ideology of organisations such as Al Qaeda and ISIL, hoping to prevent young British Muslims from catching the next plane to Turkey.

However, there is a greater problem, a worm in the heart of the attitude towards Islam in Britain.

In a much repeated Chomsky quote, we find the foundation that this article is built upon: “Everyone’s worried about stopping terrorism. Well, there’s really an easy way: Stop participating in it.” Britain’s interference in the Middle East is well recorded in history, and is continued through its current foreign policy.

The ravaged state in which our military left Iraq, combined with the collapse of civil order in Syria, created the perfect opportunity for the most fearsome and merciless militia to seize control, and pillage the Levant, in the name of their warped concept of an Islamic Caliphate.

It is very clear that we are still at war, and

American F-15s en route to bomb ISIL targets

Photo: Wikimedia Commons

Jake Bergamin Contributor whether it is with the spectre of terrorism or over national interests doesn’t excuse the fact that when a country is at war, it is only logical for it to expect attacks on its home soil. Why are do we

Come to our meetings: Mondays, 5pm, on the first floor of the Students’ Union

feel so outraged and victimised by retaliatory offences?

Britain has no problem attacking them on their territory. It is happy to support oppressive

regimes that suit its interests, invade a country under false pretences, and bomb towns and villages, leading to high civilian casualties. These are all heinous acts of terror, resulting in much wider death and destabilisation than the four terror attacks committed by radical Islamist terrorists in Britain since 2005.

Britain has got off pretty lightly.

How can we blame the Muslim youth, or those more susceptible to influence or exploitation, for their anger and disillusionment, or for joining an organisation which claims to value and empower them? The reassuring thing to remember is that, funnily enough, those Muslims who choose to join the ISIL ranks are a tiny minority, as most people have a strong aversion to ethnic cleansing and living in oppressive and intolerant societies.

But the consensus amongst our government and mainstream media appears to be that Islam is the problem; they are unwilling to acknowledge that statistically Muslims are the most common victims of terror attacks across the globe. Only days after the Chapel Hill murders of three American Muslims, The Telegraph held an online poll asking its readers if they were ‘concerned’ about the growing number of Muslims in Britain.

We need to reassess, and realise that our modes of thinking are arrogant and inherently misguided.

12

Music

Editors: Patrick Hinton, Lowell Clarke

Samuel Ward, Dan Whiteley

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

Interview

Opinion

the

OPINION

Space...

Prosumer

the MUSIC INTERVIEW

the vinyl frontier Stephen Miller Contributor The other day, I asked my Northern Quarter-dwelling friend if he’d heard the latest hipster joke, he replied “yes, I have it on vinyl.” Over a million vinyl records were sold in the UK last year, the highest figure since 1996. Yet, for every vinyl record we buy, there will more than likely be someone sat at home wondering how one fits in a laptop. Now enjoying a resurgence in popularity, vinyl records are no longer seen as antiquated relics of a bygone age.

Oh, how the turntables have, well, turned.

It is important to point out that vinyl records make up only a marginal percentage of overall music sales, roughly 3%, yet people are buying more vinyl than they have in previous decades. Why? Is it the experience of ownership? In my particular case, vinyl gives me a physical experience that feels more fulfilling; certainly a more fulfilling physical experience than a CD ever gave me, anyway.

Owning a vinyl, much like owning a book, gives you that level of satisfaction that you just can’t get from a CD or a digital source.

Convenience certainly works in favour of the CD, yet for their convenience, they eliminate the interactive element of vinyl.

You listen to a side, and then you flip it over. This may not sound the most arduous of tasks, yet it makes the listening experience something in which you are not only emotionally involved, but physically involved as well.

There’s also something rather romantic and poetic about the hum of that needle on the record grooves. Add to that the occasional crackling noise, and

you have yourself an omnidimensional sound experience to make any music aficionado’s heart melt.

Music brings people together.

Record stores are spaces for those who share a similar passion for music, even if it is for different genres. I would choose to go out to buy a record over downloading a ‘file’ on my computer any day of the week. We, the consumers, should reciprocate the effort put in to making a physical record by making the effort to get it. At least this way, you eliminate the fear of a clandestine virus coming along and draining the entire contents of your iTunes library. With vinyl, your only worry is scratching it, but only if you’re silly enough to treat it like a chew-toy.

The love we have, or have re-found for vinyl does pose a growing, underlying issue. The music industry, it seems, has hit a brick wall with regards to finding new and innovative ways for us to consume music. Looking backwards to go forwards is no solution. How long until 19th century wax phonograph cylinders make a comeback? In the pursuit for innovation, the music industry is constantly tripping over itself. Dr. Dre headphones, for example, are a clever marketing opportunity.

But, an iPod can’t match the quality of the headphones when you’re listening to an MP3 that has an even worse sound quality than a CD. I’m as happy as anyone that vinyl is on the rise, but the question we should all be asking ourselves is, what’s next?

Photo: Marc Wathieu@flickr

TOP

5 Songs

To Turn 21 To

Cecilia Bicknell

Photo: Michael Mann

Kim Kahan talks to potion’s Prosumer about vinyl, drug policy and Mancunians knowing their stuff Prosumer, a.k.a. Achim Brandenburg— storyteller, potions master and vinyl obsessive.

We get to the nitty gritty, talking about the origins of house and techno—and whether they’ll ever be the same again—drugs, and his new label Potion.

Original techno and house was started as an underground scene back in the 80s, where people who were considered ‘outsiders’ by mainstream America congregated in clubs across Chicago and Detroit which were open to everyone, regardless of race or sexuality.

It was this freedom which drew people to the clubs and fuelled the rise of Chicago house and Detroit techno. “I think that [the freedom] has mainly gone. Influential people like Derrick Carter have started asking what has happened to the old music as current mainstream artists just don’t reflect the old scene—black kids, gay kids—look at the Top 100, they aren’t represented anymore. Derrick got a lot of stick when he questioned that.”

DJing has become very different in recent years, with a lot of discussion around the topic of the DJ as a celebrity. Certain milestones mark this—Paris Hilton’s Ibiza residency, Joey Essex’s mix CD. “I can’t do the whole DJ booth raising my hands in the air. People should enjoy the music I play. I don’t understand why some people don’t dance, and instead they face the DJ all the time.

I find that irritating—what we’re doing is not witchcraft, it’s blending tracks into each other through beat mixing.”

The setup in a lot of clubs has changed as this new ‘breed’ of DJ arrives, which affects people who have been around for longer. “Light should be for the dancefloor, not to illuminate the DJ. I don’t get it. I feel shy and find myself trying to be smaller hiding behind the decks.” In clubs where the dancefloor is the focus point, the DJ can get something back too: “Someone in the audience may be smiling in a way that makes you feel good so you can give that back to the crowd.”

Vinyl sales are at an all time high since 1996,

but Brandenburg has always been a proponent of the bigger disk. “For me personally, vinyl is the best medium for music. And even if you ask people that didn’t grow up with records but CDs and MP3s, what the most valuable medium for music is, they’ll mostly answer “vinyl”.

“I think that’s because of its aesthetic and its size. The big artwork looks nicer, people can appreciate it. If you really love an album you’ll probably want it in its physical form too and vinyl is perfect for that—it’s something special.

“Vinyl of course has its imperfections, through playing it’ll get marks and scratches and become a bit individual.” I agree, noting when it skips at exactly that point where you dropped it after a heavy session, or when its crackles remind you of that night where you can’t actually remember too much. “It’s these imperfections which can make you feel connected to the physicality of a record. With some of my records, I will spot my copy within a pile of others, because I am so used to hearing a pop or hiss at a certain moment.

“I love visiting Manchester because of its music scene. In the charity shops there are loads of copies of A Guy Called Gerald’s ‘Voodoo Ray’, so you know that at one point it was in every household. Mancunians know their stuff!

Unfortunately that means you rarely find a bargain in record shops.”

Prosumer recently completed his Fabric mix for the famous London nightclub, which has recently been in the news after several drug deaths led to threats of closure by the authorities. After a huge social media campaign, the club was allowed to stay open under the condition that they install breathalysers and sniffer dogs outside the venue, becoming one of the first clubs in the country to be forced to do so. Understandably, this came under fire from a number of sources including The Guardian, who called the measures “draconian”.

Reflecting on this, Prosumer reveals: “It’s not always been as strict as this—years and years ago in Germany, when I first went to raves, they’d always have a stand with leaflets informing you about drugs, but now this has completely disappeared.

“The fact is that people will always do drugs, there’s no point in denying that. Banning drug use just makes it worse. Many cases of overdoses occur when people panic as they’re being searched and swallow all their drugs at once to avoid being prosecuted.

“People need to be educated. They need to know how to make informed decisions, rather

than being punished.”

Prosumer DJs around the world and like many of his peers he observes differences and similarities in the places that he plays in. One particular example of this was when he was with his friend Kerstin (Egert AKA Tama Sumo) in Israel. “We were in Jerusalem and then in Tel Aviv the following night. The Jerusalem crowd was mainly weed smokers and people in Tel Aviv were on who knows what. Kerstin had only packed one bag of records but she managed to play two completely different sets which catered to each audience. It was very impressive, it really stayed with me.” It’s this admiration of his peers and his humbleness which makes Achim Brandenburg such a nice person to interview.

Prosumer m\oved out of Germany to Edinburgh two years ago, which may seem a strange move for a DJ to make. Explaining this decision he tells us: “I’ve got friends here, needed to be in a German or English speaking country and I’d visited a lot because my friend studied here.” Since relocating there he’s made it his home and doesn’t see a move on the cards anytime soon “I also feel at home, but I still get excited every time I see the castle.”

Brandenburg’s friendship with surgeon and fellow producer Murat Tepeli is closely documented, reaching its next logical step in November last year with the launch of their label, Potion. The name is taken from Elton John’s ‘Your Song’, specifically the lyrics “a man who makes potions in a travelling show.” “As a DJ you’re in a travelling show.” Each weekend— which starts on a Thursday—he packs his bag of potions [records] which “provide relief for ailments so people can have a good time.”

This fruitful partnership and longtime friendship of Brandenburg and Tepeli means they’ve spent a considerable amount of time together over the years. Surprisingly, the duo’s favourite pastime is making music of the karaoke variety; “I’ve got to keep a bit of mystery in this, but a surprise hit is ‘Open Sesame’ by Leila K.” With (almost) two releases already under the belt of Potion—Tepeli’s own Drop It Like It’s Hot EP and Copenhagen duo Wilma’s EP due out this month, the label is already looking toward release three and four. The third he reveals will come from Tuff City Kids (Gerd Janson and Phillip Lauer’s collaborative project) and the fourth release will be courtesy of Prosumer himself.

1.Urge Overkill – Girl, You’ll be a Woman Soon

2. Bob Dylan – Forever Young

3. Cat Stevens - But I might Die Tonight

4. Jimi Hendrix - Foxy Lady

5. Hot Chocolate - You Sexy Thing

Dreams up thoughts of a raven haired Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction; the perfect song to float you into adulthood. Just leave out the graphic heroin overdose.

Strangely uplifting, a reminder that you may be an adult now, but you’ll never be a grown up.

Have fun while you can because, as Cat says, you might be dead tomorrow.

Because girl you got sass, work it.

Let’s hope this song helps set the mood for romancing. You’re 21 after all.

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

@ MancunionMusic /TheMancunionMusicSection

the

Music

13

Opinion Repeating the Repeat Henry Scanlan ruminates on the music lover’s quandary over repetition and discovery

For better or worse, I think we can all admit to having over-listened to our favourite music. Sporadically obsessive teenagers typically discover a great record (or get hooked on ‘Firestarter’* like I did), click it all the way to the top of the prestigious iTunes ‘Most Played’ charts/spin it until the CD or Vinyl erodes, and for a while it will be like the most glorious disease. Then they’ll get sick of the disease, and cast the song aside into some random ‘On The Go’ playlist. For a nonmusical equivalent, see the way the bored, spiteful, vindictive Andy stuffs his supposed best friend Woody into captivity underneath his bed in Toy Story 2. (*N.B parents – if your child has played one song 232 times in a month, they will most likely struggle with addiction in later life, and if that song is ‘Firestarter’, they may also become arsonists.)

My attention was drawn recently to a Facebook phenomenon that seems totally inexplicable: a page that posts the exact same picture, every single day of the year. Example: “The Same Photo Of Ralph Wiggum Everyday”. Addictive click-bait is plastered all over the web, but these pages have loyal followers numbering in the hundreds of thousands. 365 days a year, a hundred thousand people look at the same photo of

Ralph Wiggum flying through a window. The reasons for their continued following goes beyond some elusive level of hyper-postmodern irony that the rest of us don’t ‘get’, and more toward being an example of the comfort people take in finding a shred of reliable continuity nestled amongst the here-today, gone-tomorrow dog-fight of social media.

The same usually applies to our addiction to whatever music we hold most dear. We may appreciate new and different aspects of the music with each time we hear it (and sure enough, conspiracy theorists in the comment sections of those cyclical Facebook pages claim that the image of Ralph Wiggum slowly morphs before their eyes with each passing day).

But there has to be a saturation point at which you’ve gained maximum fulfilment from a piece of music, and you’re really just going back to it for the comfort it brings. Perhaps this is what ‘nostalgic’ music really constitutes: listening to something over and over until we gain a kind of cumulative memory bank of appreciation, until eventually we can literally devour everything that piece of music has to offer, right down to its finest details. (The common denominator among my tribe of grunge fans is miming every note of Billy Corgan’s heroic

solo in ‘Cherub Rock’.) When you hear music, you’re listening along with it rather than simply to it, and that’s a whole lot more straightforwardly satisfying when you know how it goes.

It’s like wrapping yourself in your old favourite blanket.

Once you’ve put the hours of listening time in, you’ve earned to the ability to absorb multiple auditory-stimulating triggers at the same time.

And this is the sensation that I think is so often mistaken for ‘nostalgia’. It’s easy to assume that you’re getting that warm, fuzzy feeling when you listen to System Of A Down for the first time in 5 years because it brings back those electrified days of youth that you were experiencing back when you were a fan. But what were you actually doing back then anyway?

Speaking from personal experience, I was basically sitting in my bedroom, listening to System Of A Down records over and over, and in the process building up the circuit of cognitive responses later to be sparked into life with re-listens years down the line. (I won’t speak for everyone here – apologies if you were in fact a SOAD groupie. Also, System Of A Down may not apply to everyone as their classified ‘nostalgia’ band, but it seemed generic enough to prove my point.)

The importance of repetition to enjoying music (and probably absolutely everything else) is the point here. (An amazing example is psychologist Diana Deutsch’s ‘speech-tosong illusion’, which is readily available online and can’t really be explained within the word limit of this article.) But a very different kind of enjoyment can be derived from breaking this cycle. Listening to music shouldn’t just be about comfort and familiarity. For most of us, a reasonable estimate is that about 80% of our musiclistening time is devoted to songs we’ve already heard.

Nevermind probably got so over played that for most people it became the same immediate, brainless short-cut to sensory pleasure as eating a Mars Bar. You don’t want to turn Kurt Cobain into a Mars Bar, do you?

While I don’t want to denigrate people’s notions of their own musical enjoyment as merely mechanical or lazy, I urge people to reassess their love for their favourite music. When you’re listening to The Blue Album for the billionth time, try and remember why you loved it in the first place. Has this large barrage of sound waves become so over familiar that you’ve lost all outside perspective of it, like your own face in the mirror? Clinging to ‘nostalgic’ music can be disruptive to your

level of musical discovery in that it’s potentially a hollow listening experience that creates the illusion of bringing back memories that weren’t even there in the first place, and are in fact pushing your pleasure buttons just because you’ve built up the memory repertoire to absorb it.

To cut a long story short: if you find yourself getting lazy with your music, or at a loose end trawling through recurring ‘Related Artists’ on Spotify, remember that falling back on

your old favourites is exactly what your idle, unambitious brain wants you to do. Don’t always be enticed by your own nostalgia. In the words of my spiritual mentor and motivator Will Smith (probably), move forward and try something new.

Photo: 20th Century Fox

Live

Live

Kate Tempest

You Me At Six / All Time Low

Gorilla – 12th February 2015 Will Ellis Wow. Not many artists would be able to perform the first 10 minutes of their set without a single note playing. But the a capella poem that Kate Tempest chose to open her set provided evidence for the essence of what this Mercury music nominated artist is. Pure passion. Passion for storytelling.

Passion for performing. Passion for presenting her view of what should be done to make this world a better place.

Now this can make Tempest seem as a bit of a preacher, she certainly doesn’t keep her opinions to herself. And whilst she walks the tightrope between social commentary and all out preaching, sometimes she does stumble slightly to the latter.

With most artists this would be cause to turn off, roll your eyes and wait to hear the next song play. But it is Tempest’s passion that saves her. Whilst she speaks you are aware that her words come from a place of caring and genuine desire. Desire to empower the audience and inspire change.

After leaving the sold out crowd at Gorilla in a state of stunned silence after her first poem, Tempest’s band bring their own element to the unique

sound. A futuristic mix of drum and bass with electronic and dubstep elements. This further adds power to the punch that each song packs. With emotion seeping out of each song, intensifying as the set goes on with the stage with her tongue in cheek comedic observations combining with her hard cutting social truths.

Photo: villunderlondon @flickr

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It’s clear from watching her perform that Tempest has her eyes set sky high and from hearing her talk, she wants to do it on her own terms. Not pandering to the stereotypes of what women in the music industry have to be.

Manchester Arena – 13th February 2015 Hannah Brierley You Me at Six and All Time Low performing together on the same tour… pretty much a ‘pop punk’ 13 year old’s idea of heaven. I was initially worried for what I had got myself in for when first turning up to the arena. Flocks of young girls in questionable attire, and every other person having an awkward mum or dad strung along unwillingly behind them.

I sat undecided for which way this show was going to go.

Walk The Moon first took to stage with an exciting and energetic performance. Playing new tracks such as ‘ Spend your $$$’ and ‘Shut-up and Dance’ from their new album Talking Is Hard. Their childish performance got a really good reaction from the crowd, upping the excitement, which was a good set up as they passed the show on to All Time Low. All Time Low exploded onto the stage opening with ‘A Love Like War’ from their most recent album. They continued to play their biggest songs from all of their past work, which went down really well. In between

songs there was a great stage presence and ongoing comedy between the members of the group. Their immature humour, including joking about side boobs, peperoni nipples and dressing like Justin Bieber really charmed the crowd. It was clear that there was a really good connection between the band and their audience.

Then it was time for You Me At Six to take the stage, and the whole atmosphere was then altered. Going from a fun up-beat one to a serious and dark one. Front man Josh Franceschi’s vocals weren’t

Photo: Wikimedia Commons

6/10

really up to scratch, singing some quite poor bum notes and being totally inaudible between choruses. There was also a lack of stage presence with just a black out in-between songs.

Despite this, there were some truly amazing moments; songs like ‘Fire Works’ and ‘Crash’ had everyone’s lighters in the air and the whole room singing their hearts out. I also cannot fault the rest of the bands musical performance: the guitar and drums solos were completely on point. The night was incredible to watch, and amazing to be a part of.

14 the

Music

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

Feature

The Virtues Of Hip Hop Masters

António Rolo Duarte spoke to University of Manchester student Louise Middleton, whose research shows that rhyming patterns come as second nature to some of hip hop’s biggest stars As Louise Middleton walked into The Mancunion office last week, few would immediately dub her a hip hop enthusiast.

Calm yet joyful, impeccably dressed though still very youngspirited, Middleton doesn’t fit the type which society would usually associate to the angry, belligerent songs emblematic of the genre.

Still, Middleton recently produced a research project into hip hop language which received local and national media attention and her passion for the musical style is as evident as it gets. Her intention in conducting the project was exactly to break the stereotypes surrounding the genre: “I did the project because it made me annoyed that people thought that hip hop was so basic and so stupid. I was really fed up of hip hop being viewed

so negatively because I don’t think there is much of a reason for that.”

Middleton examined the tracks of artists including multiple Grammy award-winner Eminem and Public Enemy, finding that the rhymes that make them superstars are so intuitive they are not within their conscious control.

She examined the rhyming structures in rap music looking at rhyming patterns, vocabulary size, rhyme rate and the position of the rhyme in or across lines.

This was compared with the frequency of half-rhymes, which use similar but not identical sounds and indicate a more natural capacity for rhyming and rapping than the more traditional rhymes taught at school.

“You know when you’re a child and you get asked what rhymes

with this or that? You say cat, and then what rhymes with cat? Mat, bat, etcetera. And you notice that they all have that same pattern. ”

Hip hop has the most sophisticated use of rhyme of any genre

“With half-rhymes that is not what you have at all. For example, you could have rock and hop. So that final consonant sound is different. It doesn’t match up.”

The high vocabulary score and high prevalence of ‘imperfect’ half rhymes and unique sentence structure, over and above the use of more traditional and deliberate rhyming couplets, proved the theory that rap’s biggest stars find their success in their ability to rhyme subconsciously.

“My research found that over 70% of the time artists used half-rhyme. These imperfect rap rhymes are not something that you simply come up with on the spot but something that popular rap artists have the natural ability to create. ” “I think that hip hop has the most sophisticated use of rhyme

of any genre and when written down and it reads just like poetry.”

The project was developed for Quantitative Research Methodology, a third year module in the Linguistics undergraduate degree at The University of Manchester.

Middleton initially suggested several different project themes to her lecturer, who accepted the hip hop one with enthusiasm.

“I couldn’t believe that he took me seriously, not in a bad way but it was just so nice. Some people would just laugh at you or turn their nose down at you but he was just like ‘no this is cool, go for it!’ and then actually suggested some papers for me to read.”

Dr Wendell Kimper, the lecturer who supervised the project, said: “Louise’s research helps us to understand how our

brains process and understand sounds. It opens up other avenues of research which could allow us to find out why some kinds of rhyme come more naturally than others and why some kinds of sounds work better as imperfect rhymes than others”.

Asked about her plans for the future, Middleton is straightforward: “Hopefully I’ll be starting my masters in linguistics in September here. I would love to write all about this and maybe I will, who knows?”

Want to Write for us?

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The Mancunion Recommends

Philip Selway

Rae Morris – Unguarded

The Deaf Institute – 14th February 2015 Jacob Evans It’s Valentine’s day, and the Radiohead drummer leads the audience through an intimate display of genius rhythmic pop, showcasing his debut Familial, and it’s follow up Weatherhouse. Playing to a packed crowd in the small Deaf Institute, Selway and his band open with a sparse, gentle one-two of ‘Miles Away’ and ‘By Some Miracle’, both drawing the audience in through ethereal electronics and samples, the latter adding delicate acoustic guitar to proceedings. But it’s when recent single ‘Around Again’ kicks in that the night really takes off, a jazz number led by a complicated, shuffling beat and gliding layers of synths and strings. ‘Around Again’ is the first reminder that Selway’s day job is a drummer for the most innovative and experimental band to hit the mainstream in the last twenty years – dominated by complex, flowing beats, with layer upon layer of percussion and rhythm, Selway’s voice typically the only real melodic element.

The music tends to alternate between quieter numbers and rhythm dominated pop for the rest of the set, but somehow it never gets old – the complex polyrhythms and wide variety

of sounds and instruments ranging from simple guitar and drums to vibraphones and even musical saw keep things interesting, holding the audience’s attention even as the general mood puts the audience into an ethereal, contemplative haze. The only exceptions to this are the set’s two closers – “It Will End in Tears” begins as a mournful, funereal march, exploding into a euphoric, brass drenched finish, and the last song of the night “Let it Go” (retrospectively renamed “I’m Over it Now” by Selway out of shame) starts as the sparsest song of the night, before swelling

9/10

into a full sing along climax.

Selway’s voice shines too, he’s developed a gentle, delicate croon that morphs into ethereal harmonies with his band. Whilst similarities to Thom Yorke are inevitable, particularly with his frequent use of mantralike repetition, Selway has generally found his own voice, a warm, intimate one that rarely rises above a whisper. As a performer, Selway perfectly fits the occasion, making calm, wry comments between songs and drawing the packed room in, making the night a truly special one.

Photo: Pangaea Festival

Photo: kmeron @flickr

Atlantic Records; 26th January

6/10

Adam Stockley Following guest vocals with Clean Bandit and Bombay Bicycle Club in 2014, Rae Morris takes centre stage with Unguarded . Overall, it is a pleasant listen, but not without its flaws.

The album’s first track, ‘Skin`, is the best song on the album. Opening with high piano keys intertwined with clock chimes, you can tell immediately how smart her debut is going to be.

With so many twenty-somethings crying over their exes, it’s impressive to see someone come across as so authentic and sincere. The range of the album’s scope is also a highlight. Morris is able to move from subtle ballads (e.g. `This Time`), to pop singles (e.g. `Closer`) with ease. By doing so, her confidence shines through.

However, Unguarded is not without its flaws.

At times, the album feels overproduced. The song `Under The Shadows` is a prime example of this. Too often, it feels like it is trying too hard to be the next Ellie Goulding single. All the interesting textures seen on tracks like `Skin` are washed away here, leaving only a bland skeleton behind. While it is obviously radiofriendly, you get the impression it would have been so much better in another producer’s hands.

The album has a couple of dud tracks along the way too. `Cold`, a duet with Fryars, feels uninspired, as well as overproduced. So overproduced in fact that the vocal effects on Fryars’ voice comes across as jarring. `Love Again` feels like a cynical checklist for the Radio 1 playlist, with generic lyrics such as “We could fall in love again”, as well as an IKEA Calvin Harris chorus. When placed next to genuinely authentic songs, it completely disrupts the album’s flow. It seems strange when great nonalbum tracks, such as `Grow`, did not make the final cut, but these two did. If Morris had gotten

rid of these, she could have made an impressive 10 track, 40 minute album.

Let’s make this clear: for the most part, this is a really impressive debut, but Unguarded ’s bad tracks and overproduction let the side down. A shame.

Photo: Artwork

Games

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

15

Editors: James Thursfield, Matthew Cole

Hardware Review

How ‘new’ is the New Nintendo 3DS? Josh Goldie gives his verdict on the latest iteration of the dual-screened handheld

Every time we get a new handheld generation we are almost guaranteed updated models of it. Sony’s PlayStation Portable and PlayStation Vita have seen upgrades to the hardware that are mostly unnoticeable. In Nintendo’s case the changes are usually much more apparent. With the Nintendo DS we received both a Light and XL version and with the Gameboy Advance we also got a Mini and a flip-up version known as the Gameboy Advance SP. Now, with the Nintendo 3DS the cycle is continuing with the release of the New Nintendo 3DS (taking a page from Apple in its naming).

The big question surrounding Nintendo’s New 3DS is, what exactly makes it ‘new’? The New 3DS comes in

Photo: Photo:Simmone Roxanne Henne Ready@Flickr @Flickr

two sizes called normal and XL. On the surface what differentiates the ‘New’ 3DS from the older models is the now colourful face buttons and a second stick/slider/nub. The ‘nub’ does not move like a stick and is instead supersensitive to the movement of your thumb. It works surprisingly well but is unfortunately under-utilised by its current library of games. It is worth noting that any game that previously used the circle pad pro such as Monster Hunter 3 & 4 will now use the nub.

There are other changes to the physical layout of the New 3DS that are also worth mentioning. There are two new buttons on the New 3DS called ZR and ZL. These work much like any trigger button seen on the Wii U, with

Top 5: Worst Game Titles

the ZR and ZL buttons providing two additional shoulder buttons which I think are more comfortable to use than the original L & R buttons.

A more controversial change is the moving of the game card slot, power button and stylus holder which are all now at the bottom of the New 3DS. This has made some people worried that they might accidentally turn off their New 3DS or push out the cartridge while they play—however I do not think this is likely. Both require some pressure in order to be used and if you are holding the handheld correctly, it is unlikely that you will accidentally press either of them. However, the stylus change can sometimes be a bit of a problem. One problem I had with my old 3DS was that my stylus would wear out and wouldn’t fit into my 3DS properly. This would not have been such a problem if the holder was on top like before, but now the stylus is always upside down. If it wears out then there is no chance of it staying in its slot.

The volume slider is also now on the top screen, the opposite side to the 3D slider, and feels exactly like the 3D slider from before. The wireless slider has been removed from the New 3DS, meaning that your New 3DS will always be connected to the Internet and streetpass, if it is activated. The reasons for these two particular changes is due to the back of the New 3DS being detachable. Both the regular New 3DS and the New XL have a back plate that can be taken off in a similar manner to an non-Apple phone. You do require a screwdriver to remove the back plate, and something to pry it open. Thankfully the new stylus has been designed with the latter in mind.

Behind this back plate is where you will find an interchangeable battery and a MicroSD slot. The New Nintendo 3DS uses MicroSDs rather than the standard SD cards that the original 3DS used, so if you plan on upgrading, remember to buy a MicroSD if you don’t have one already. It is also worth noting that the New 3DS already comes with

5) Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance Do not misunderestimate Hideo Kojima’s ability to blunderfail like an imbeciliot.

a 4GB card, but if you are planning on transferring your games from your old 3DS, you will need one of the same or more space than what was on your old SD card).

The reason that the back plate can be removed is thanks to the new face plate option on the standard New 3DS. Now you can buy faceplates so that you are not stuck with the standard one colour look of your New 3DS; you can have a Mario skin or a Zelda skin or even just some polka dots. The choice is yours.

The New XL however does not have the option to change and the front plate cannot be removed.

The problem with the New 3DS is that on the outside it does not look very different from the original 3DS. Whilst there are some noticeable visual differences, a lot of the improvements come from internal changes. One such improvement is the tracking software in the camera that now allows you to view the 3D from multiple angles, which is a nice addition, although still not perfect. The processing power of the New 3DS has also received a massive upgrade and this is very noticeable.

Many games like Monster Hunter 4 and Majora’s Mask 3D look and run faster on the New 3DS. The download speed for games has increased tenfold and the loading times on the menu and ingame has dropped dramatically. The only real problem I have found with the internal ability of the New 3DS is

Photo: Roxanne Ready@Flickr

how difficult it is to transfer data from your old 3DS to your New 3DS. You are offered three ways to transfer your old data and the recommended means is also the longest. After following all of the instructions for transferring on the 3DS, you also have to undo the back of the handheld and manually move everything from one 3DS to the other.

This may sound long and frustrating— and that’s because it is. However, it is also the only way to keep your entire save data for any downloadable title.

Despite its flaws, the biggest appeal of the New 3DS for me is something that has not actually happened yet. The exclusive games. Much like Nintendo’s DSi which had its own shop that you could purchase exclusive games on, the New Nintendo 3DS will have exclusive games that take advantage of the New

Photo: Sorethumbretrogames @Flickr Photo: Roxanne Ready@Flickr

4) Tactics Ogre: 3) Golf Magazine 2) Mobile Presents 36 Great Suit Gundam: Let Us Cling Holes Starring Together Gundam vs.

Fred Couples Zeta Gundam Let us clingfilm the marketers in their sleep, amiright?!

Rejected sequel: Golf Magazine Presents Tiger Woods with 36 Holes

Did someone say Gundam?

3DS’ processing power. The first of these is Xenoblade Chronicles 3D which will launch in May and other games such as Majora’s Mask 3D and Codename S.T.E.A.M have also been promised.

Whilst nothing is here yet, the promise of exclusive software has definitely been a driving force behind many people’s purchases of the console and will likely be the driving force later on.

The New Nintendo 3DS is certainly ‘new’ to an extent. It still plays like a 3DS and they share the same library. This represents a process similar to what was experienced with older Nintendo handhelds such as the DSi and Game Boy Colour. Both of these platforms eventually got amazing exclusives like Shantae 2 and Pokemon Crystal respectively. Eventually the New Nintendo 3DS will get software to make it stand out but until then it is hard to justify buying one despite the new features. If you plan on upgrading your 3DS or are just buying a 3DS for the first time, I whole-heartedly recommend the New Nintendo 3DS. However, if you are still comfortable with your old 3DS, then I would hold off until some promising exclusive games get announced. The system is cheaper than the regular 3DS when it came out and it is easily worth the money. I love my New 3DS and its extra features, it is a good machine but without the exclusive software to make use of the updated features, it does not feel worth upgrading for just yet.

1) Silhouette Mirage: Unprogrammed Hope Who told Joey to get his thesaurus out again?

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

Editors: Aimée Grant Cumberbatch, Gráinne Morrison, Nikki Patel

/TheMancunion: Fashion & Beauty

Top 5

@MancunionFash

Agony Aunt

Beauty

Beauty fixes: the fitness edit your body, meaning that you’re probably dehydrated. Bump Activity: Swimming, Mare: Itchy skin

up the water intake and tone down your coffee and alcohol

Activity: Spinning, Mare: Rogue tendrils

Diving into chlorinated water without some form of

consumption (apologies) to hydrate from the inside out.

Despite our greatest efforts, that pre-workout bun/

dermo-protectant is a skin sin so think twice before you

Breathing through your mouth and licking your lips during

ponytail of steel never seems to behave, meaning a

hit the Aquatics Centre. There are loads of ‘skin-shields’

your session also dramatically dries them out so try to tweak

quick, extremely fuzzy sprint out of the gym doors

out there for avid swimmers, but coconut oil slathered

your technique. Failing that, a good slick of Burt’s Bees Pink

and onto the Magic Bus. The Goody Simple Style

on the skin and hair works just as well due to its acidity.

Grapefruit Lip balm, £3.69 before and after your workout

Spin Pin, £5.49 grabs your hair from underneath for

A post-dip shower is essential, as is nourishing your skin

will soften any flakes and leave them feeling supple.

a tight hold and a flawless sporty finish as you spin

while it’s still damp. Palmer’s Cocoa Butter, £4.15, has never failed me.

to victory.

Whether you spin, lift or Zumba your way to fitness, the athletic lifestyle can take it’s toll on your beauty regime. With a few simple tweaks

Activity: Aerobics, Mare: Dry, over washed hair If you’re an avid hairwasher because you can’t stand

nothing will ever get in the way of your workout sesh again. Nikki Patel

leaving the house with sweaty hair it’s important to

Activity: Yoga, Mare: Frizz mat can leave your previously sleek ponytail in disarray.

To avoid any hair mares, be sure to mist Batiste Dry Shampoo, £2,99 along your hairline and the nape of your

Elixir Ultime Huile Lavante Bain, £16.00 is worth

neck as these are most fuzz-prone areas. Combing in a

splashing out for to save your precious tendrils from

leave-in serum is also a good idea and means that you can

overdrying and split ends. A weekly nourishing mask

go from the gym to uni without the trauma of brushing it

such as Kerastase Masque Nutri-Thermique, £21.00, is

through afterwards.

also vital as it gives our chance a hair to recover from

Top tip: rub handcream onto your lips before applying lip balm for full hydration and protection against the elements.

extremely admirable active lifestyle.

Guide

Trend

As the AW15 runway shows take place across the fashion

trainer at affordable prices: Zara has a flatform style

capitals of the world, it is time to take our attention

similar to that on the DKNY catwalk, while River Island

back to the here and now – SS15. The classic themes of

has most styles of trainer all at more affordable prices

summer bohemian and nautical were present in many

than their designer inspirations.

a catwalk show, but so too was the recent favourite sports luxe. It is a trend that has been growing for a few

Dear Adrienne, I’m all for living a healthy life-style: eating five portions of fruit and veg a day, raising my heart rate to the recommended intensity at least three times a week, drinking two litres of water daily and sometimes even getting the recommended hours of sleep a night. But the stress of second semester has meant that I spend more and more time on campus completing assignments than usual. It’s bad enough having to lug around my gym gear along with a laptop and several books. Never mind that everyone can tell I’ve been sweating it out on the treadmill—never a great look. How do you suggest I balance my newfound healthy lifestyle without compromising my style credentials?

1. Depending on what type of training you are doing, gym trainers can be replaced with casual trainers that can also be worn throughout the rest of the day. Take care when making this decision, as going on a treadmill with trainers that offer no sole support is not recommended. But for weight and mat training, these trainers will do just fine.

2. Avoid unnecessary layers in the gym and opt for a sports bra and a thin t-shirt instead. You should be getting hot anyway! More layers equal more luggage.

3. If you’re going from the gym to class, keep your outfit simple to ensure that you can get dressed quickly. Who wants to spend more time than necessary in the gym changing rooms?

4. For me, gym days are usually make-up free, so bring face wash and moisturiser in small containers to leave your skin feeling fresh with a post-workout glow. Stick to concealer and mascara, as you may be rushing. Doing a full face with unfamiliar lighting could be a mare.

Good luck with your fitness pursuit.

Adrienne xxx

Kathryn Murray lends a helping hand to those left confused about where and when sportswear is appropriate

In life there are rules. To save some confusion, I am going to write down a few guidelines on how to style sportswear.

You might think it is a good idea to go out in your gym kit but is it really? Think about it.

Readers respond

Skirting around the issue “We Adrienne Galloway on tennis’ soft spot for skirts

jackets, mesh with chiffon, neon highlights, streamlined accessories. If you style yourself well: sleek hair, high heels, racing stripe allin-one, then you JUST MIGHT be dressed to Grammy standard. Maybe.

on classic shapes with a modern edge.

Alexander Wang showcased a multitude of sportsinspired pieces in his SS15 runway show, including neon scuba dresses, heeled trainers and sports mesh fabrics interlaced with sleek tailoring. At Topshop Unique they

“I won’t enter the gym unless my sports bra coordinates with my yoga pants. Look good, gym good” Rachel Claire Learmonth

Places where it is not appropriate to be gym ready: 1. An interview - dress to impress, not to show your commitment to exercise 2. Formal occasions such as the Grammy Awards ( Helen Lasichanh take note) 3. Meetings with academic advisors or seminar leaders 4. Nights out - if you need a sports bra for support, you might be dancing a bit too hard 5. Restaurants, although sometimes leggings are needed for buffet-style events

Proving that the sport trend can be worn with anything; androgynous or feminine, day or night – this is an easy trend for everyone.

On the DKNY runway sports mesh fabrics breathed a youthful edge into fifties inspired midi dresses, crop tops and midi skirts, with bomber jackets and flatform trainers amping up the show’s athletic edge. Akris also utilised the sporting accessory, with models strutting down the runway wearing visors in an array of colours.

For students, the sporty accessory may be one of the easiest routes into the trend. Trainers have become frequent visitors on the catwalk over the last few seasons; the practical, comfortable shoe has been used as an alternative to the high heel and has become a favourite with street style stars. Across the high street there are various interpretations of the new fashion

Photo: alifeinlouboutins.blogspot.com

Are you still feeling a bit unsure? Don’t worry, most people are. As long as you know your limits, you will be ok. Although, swimsuits on the street will never happen.

And if you are really struggling to keep pace with this sports-wear as day-wear trend, try to aim for a more luxe look. Less goingto-a-spinning-class and more just-off-therunway. Simple, yet effective. Think slouchy

Did you know?

“Blood, sweat and tears is the only look I’m going for” Marie Louise Brown

styled the models in scuba dresses and retro inspired cycling jumpers with flippy skirts, hot pants or trousers.

Ask You Answer ”

Fun fact

Last week we asked you: “Does it matter what you look like when you work out?”

Places where you can go with your running leggings on: 1. Lectures, because who really cares?

2. The gym, because duh 3. Sainsbury’s Fallowfield, even pyjamas are acceptable here 4. Around the house, or someone else’s house 5. Wherever you are immediately before the gym

seasons, but SS15 witnessed the sports luxe trend take

Clockwise from top left: Blue ribbed jumper, Topshop, £38; Sports bra, New Look, £9.99; Backpack, Herschel, £60; Nike Air Zoom Elite 7, £90; Citrus Zinger infusion water bottle, Debenhams, £15; Leggings, Adidas, £36

Firstly, I would personally like to take the time to congratulate you on your pursuit of a healthy lifestyle. I think we can all agree that making it this far is an achievement in itself. This dilemma is not an uncommon one for the residents of Fallowfield I’m sure; being torn between neglecting the gym altogether or enduring the bus ride home to pick up your stuff only to get there and end up napping instead. Like your gym bag, this guilt weighs you down. Here are a few suggestions that may help:

Features

Where to wear: athletic Spotlight on sports luxe apparel Sarah Kilcourse on how to add a sporty edge to your wardrobe this season

We’ve picked our fail-safe fitness buys, for easy gym to class transition

All of that twisting, turning and grinding on your yoga

invest in a silicone-free hydrating shampoo. Kerastase

the heat, sweat and over washing that comes with your

Look good, gym good

This week, resident style guru Adrienne Galloway tackles a fitness fashion conundrum

Activity: Jogging, Mare: Chapped lips

17

Shopping guide

Ask Adrienne

Dry, chapped lips are often a sign of what’s going on inside

Fashion

“What do you mean ‘work out’?”

Dan Lausanne

Photo:giz-img.blogspot.com This month Serena Williams won the Australian Open for the 6th time and it had nothing to do with her skirt

Photo: bethanyatalya.blogspot.com

Helen Lasichanh and Pharrell Williams at the 57th Annual Grammy Awards. Hmm...

The ‘This Girl Can’ ad campaign by Sport England aims to show that all types of women can participate in sports, and is a celebration of active females all across the UK. Interestingly, this example of empowerment in sport features a glimpse of a netball match in which a small minority of players are wearing netball skirts.

The debate about women in sports is ongoing, but what part does dress code have to play?

Female athletes on the world stage such as Venus and Serena Williams have been seen wearing some outrageous outfits on court over the years, but this doesn’t detract from the fact that they are extremely talented tennis players.

Although there is no overarching rule in tennis regarding skirts, a lot of players choose to wear skirts or dresses – and get plenty of endorsements for doing so. However, when female boxing was finally declared an Olympic sport in 2009, it was proposed that female boxers wear skirts to

allow the spectators to distinguish them from men. Although this campaign gained a lot of support, after receiving criticism from boxers and the wider public it was scrapped. There are many other ways to distinguish a boxer than by a skirt: their face, their team colours, or simply by looking at the names of the players competing.

Years ago, women had to wear corsets whilst playing tennis; this was later abandoned because of the obvious restriction on physical activity. I personally believe that if the outfit allows you to be comfortable then go for it, but when it is unnecessarily forced then it becomes a tad ridiculous. Aimée Grant Cumberbatch reminisces about P.E. in secondary school, lamenting the stupidity of dress code rules, saying: “We used to be made to wear netball skirts over our tracksuit bottoms.” Seem a bit pointless to you?

“People who care about their appearance while working out are just vain. you’re there to get fit not look fit” Debbie Patel

Photo: adidas.com

The Stade Français rugby jersey is a perfect example of what happens when fashion and sport collide. Known for more than being third in the 2014-15 Top 14, thanks to their eye-catching kit. Club president Guazzini first introduced a pink jersey in

“Stop asking such stupid questions” Anjana Selvanathan

2005 as the colour was rarely used in rugby and assured the team stood out from the crowd. It successfully created the buzz

“My neon lycra meggings leave nothing to the imagination, no false advertising here” Phil Shuttleworth

Guazzini wanted and the team haven’t looked back. However, in 2006 before a match against red jersey-wearing Toulouse,

“Make gains, get girls. That’s my mantra” Ben Murphy

the referee banned Stade Français from wearing the jerseys, citing the age old fashion commandment to never mix pink and red.

Film

18

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

Editors: Tom Bruce, Andriana Hambi, James Moules, Martin Solibakke Feature

TV Binge

Sex on Screen

Bitter Lake

Nadia Cheung discusses the realities (and unrealities) of sex on film and asks the question: are we all just faking it?

Photo: BBC

Four years ago, Adam Curtis charted the rise of the TV hug on his BBC blog, The Medium and the Message. In his post he argued that, over time, TV had taught audiences to express their feelings more openly, and that audiences imitated the public emotion they saw on their screens because they believed it would help them to become authentic individuals, when in fact it had manipulated them into further conformity through strategies of control. The piece is signature Adam Curtis material; he is able to take a seemingly innocuous act, trend, or belief, and recast it as a pernicious ill in society.

Bitter Lake, his latest documentary, embarks on a graver undertaking, and tells the story of US and British involvement in Afghanistan, exploring the ways in which western powers’ attempts to reshape the world have backfired. In its tremendous scope, the film exposes the contradictory political operations and agendas that play out on the global stage, and how the seeds of minor international events remain dormant for decades before blossoming into extraordinary disasters. With a running time of two hours and 17 minutes, Curtis has ample time to weave together issues that have dominated his work over the last 30 years, namely those of power, the media, and social engineering.

Although Bitter Lake is ambitious in its scope, and chews through plenty material to justify its length, for the most part the pictures unfold at a leisurely stroll. During the first 12 minutes or so, Curtis’s quietly dogmatic narration drifts in for a mere thirty seconds. The disparate footage comprising the documentary is held before us like a pageant, and we are left to take meaning from the clips without knowing the identities of the directors or the years in which they were filming. Curtis has used his voice sparingly in previous films, but here his absence is especially stark. The research has been cooked down like spinach, to the point where his narrative is almost swamped and lost amidst the mesmerising collage of armed conflict, dance, sci-fi film and monolithic cityscape.

A ruthless pursuit of aestheticism opens Curtis up to the charge that his documentaries favour style over substance. YouTuber and blogger, Ben Woodhams, parodied the style in his own YouTube video several years ago. Impersonating the BBC filmmaker, Woodhams narrates: “Adam Curtis believed that 200000 Guardian readers watching BBC2 could change the world. But this was a fantasy. In fact, he had created the televisual equivalent of a drunken late-night Wikipedia binge with potential for narrative coherence… to a soundtrack of Brian Eno and Nine Inch Nails. He had discovered that it did not matter what footage he used, so long as he changed the shot so bewilderingly fast that the audience didn’t notice the chasm between argument and conclusion.”

Woodhams’s critique is still valid. Throughout Bitter Lake, Curtis paints in broad brush strokes, as in his opening in which he states that, ‘increasingly, we live in a world where nothing makes any sense.’ Of course he is right, but he is also vague and uncontentious. And there is some degree of trickery at work in his film.

Historical epochs are described in terms of moods, and innocent phrases disguise tendentious arguments, sleights of hand that should put one on guard; Curtis occasionally slips into the careerpolitician speak he is trying to denounce.

Matthew Cole This is an abridged version of a longer article. Continue reading at www.mancunion.com/film

I think it’s safe to say most people have seen sex on screen. From bare breasts to full frontal genitalia, there is a lot to say about films that have sex in it, as to pornography with a well-plotted narrative. Simulated or not, sex is part of being human. Like each human relationship, films with different narratives and stances on style will treat sex and eroticism differently. We can thank the 1960s for liberating pornography into the mainstream through to the 1970s where films like Deep Throat became box office smash hits. Experimental artists like Andy Warhol explored film as a new art medium exploring sex and voyeurism, opening the doors to bondage, homosexuality, as well as other forms of pornography. Luis Buñuel’s Belle de Jour is one of my personal favourites from this time—and I think it liberates fantasies of sadism and masochism as well as bondage on screen. Made in 1967, this film explores a recently married virgin who, rather than having sex with her husband, leads a secret life as a prostitute working in a high-class brothel during the day.

In more recent years, movies like Lars Von Trier’s Nyphomaniac Part I and II have made us question film as art, whether we are being brought to the attention on the subject matter of a sex addiction, or if the shock value is what is desirable about it. Abdellatif Kechiche’s Blue is the Warmest Colour also chooses to do this as well, but perhaps this is less shocking for some because it is a sexual relationship between two women being shown on screen explicitly. Pornhub recently published their most searched terms for their website, and for a few countries, particularly in the UK and USA, “lesbian” was the most popular to a majority of male subscribers.

There is still a thing for MILFs and teens too, so not much has really changed.

In terms of cinema history and some theory, too, you could very well argue that

eroticism on screen began with women being portrayed as a visual pleasure for the spectator. I’ve lost count the number of times I have seen bare breasts on screen, but I’ve certainly seen more I have naked men. Some

Photo: ZenTropa Entertainments

films like Bronson (2008) treat male nudity as a choice that the characters themselves have made that you don’t quite question why or how, other than for comedic value. Sex symbols like Jean Harlow, Marlene Dietrich and Marilyn Monroe rose to prominence for their presence on screen as well as talent.

Male counterparts of a sex symbol also exist.

Actors like Brad Pitt, Ryan Gosling, Channing Tatum among many others are those that a lot women (and men) gush over. But that isn’t necessarily sex—it is more of a fantasy. What

I mean is that we are introduced to up-andcoming stars who are not only talented, but attractive, and we are given the privilege to look at them topless, semi-naked, or thrusting a fellow actor on screen.

I think cinema today can say a lot about the society we live in. There has been a sense that even though we are in the 21st century, people are still tight-lipped about what they get up to behind closed doors—not a lot of people discuss sex openly and Andrew Haigh’s 2011 film Weekend articulates this idea beautifully—particularly when one of the main characters expresses how homosexual sex is treated as shameful, therefore it is not talked about so much as heterosexual sex.

However, films like The Living End (1992) and Law of Desire (1987) appropriate stereotypical attitudes to homosexuality. Both films are particularly funny, approaching subjects like the fear of AIDS and dysfunctional homosexual relationships that have not been quite explored in mainstream cinema before. There are a lot of films that approach sex differently, and because sex is something so private to a lot of people, it can be uncomfortable for most to talk about— instead there are innuendos, corny sex jokes, and the occasional sex tip sharing between some. Sex in film I find is a way to liberate this discomfort—visually experiencing something that feels familiar yet comparative. Perhaps that’s why 50 Shades of Grey has been so popular. Yes, we are so, so liberated.

Classic Review

Boogie Nights Porn. A taboo subject for many in modern British society. Just mentioning the word can be enough to repulse any uptight square. Though,

Director: Paul Thomas Anderson Starring: Mark Wahlberg, William H. Macy, Julianne Moore Released: 1997

walk-in scene, it’s been done before, but this style of introduction establishes the story perfectly and even more glamorously than its

Photo: New Line

rewind forty years and the porn industry was big business. A big, glitzy and profitable business if you are to believe Paul Thomas Anderson’s take on the industry through the 70s – 80s.

From the get-go we are transported to the place to be in night-time Los Angeles. The nightclub is booming, merriment in full flow, as the camera guides us through the ensuing party and to the movers and shakers present, finishing on young pot-washer Eddie (Mark Wahlberg), viewing from afar and dreaming of having his own piece of the action. Akin to the legendary Goodfellas

predecessor. Eddie makes his way to the top of the game, transforming himself into Dirk Diggler, a name so grand it could never be created via the first pet/mum’s maiden name porn-personagenerating game (mine’s Brucie Hanrahan, for the record). The good times continue until the bleaker 80s are introduced with a sharp bang and the industry’s success drastically declines.

Key to the film’s success is its characters, especially in the supporting roles with multiple lives facing the repercussions of their industry involvement. Downtrodden Little Bill (William

H Macy) exemplifies the fact that not all are able to profit in happiness, as he is tormented by his adult actress wife’s overt and frequent infidelities. The outdated cowboy Buck (Don Cheadle) is told that in order to survive outside of porn, he needs to get a new look and evolve, mirroring the deteriorating condition of the porn industry as time elapses, whilst Burt Reynolds’ kingpin director is one in which the film gravitates around, as an endearing porn patriarch.

Even the best actors need finely written characters to produce the magic. Both aspects work in tandem during Boogie Nights, with Julianne Moore’s character enjoying the hedonistic life on one hand, but on the other she’s unable to fill the void of the child she has no access to. Lead character Dirk Diggler shouts a claim to one of the best rise-to-fall stories in film history, as he becomes addled with persona problems and also narcotics. Diggler’s innocent nature at the start is contrasted later by his participation in one of the most unsettling drug deals on screen.

Anderson’s work excels in portraying the vibes associated with the covered time period, mainly through a stand out soundtrack, as equally well showcased in his most recent effort Inherent Vice. Some of the grooviest numbers are efforts from the aptly named Boney M and with Brand New Key by Melanie proving a fitting audio backing to an intimate Rollergirl scene.

With the high points oozing as much cool as a multicoloured LED dancefloor and lows as troubling as a deflated water bed, Boogie Nights epitomises the best and worst aspects of the 70s porn industry to perfection.

Jack Lunn

Film 19

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM /MancunionFilm @mancunionfilm

Review

Top 5

Sex Objects in Movies

Fifty Shades of Grey Elliot Coen gives the film adaptation of the original ‘Mummy-porn’ a good thrashing Sex has never looked so boring. Fifty Shades of Grey is to middle-aged women what lingerie catalogues are to inquisitive prepubescent boys. Anyone who has grown up in the age of the Internet, male or female, will find nothing shocking in this self-proclaimed shocking film. That is not to say that the film is just aiming for my mother’s demographic cohort; all of the typical tropes of young adult fiction are present, mostly funneled through the mess that is Ms. Anastasia Steele. Fifty Shades of Grey is most certainly not made for me, a male in his early 20s, which makes my not hating it all the more bemusing.

I didn’t like the film much, but I also didn’t loathe it. It isn’t even in the bottom five films I’ve seen in cinemas in 2015, and we’re only in February.

Firstly, I’ve got to deal with the bads, as this film is riddled with them. Everything you have heard through the grapevine about the dialogue is categorically true. I have to admit, I haven’t done my proper research as a journalist by reading the novel by E L James, but I’ve garnered through osmosis that it’s a piece of shit. It’s true about E L James insisting that the filmmakers use her original dialogue in the film. Had she let them be, the conversations between Anastasia and Christian could have been something more than laughable, but her self-righteousness got in the way. Apparently, disputes between her and direc-

tor Sam Taylor-Johnson were so volatile that TaylorJohnson wants nothing to do with the now locked-in sequels. Were the riches and infamy not enough for you already, E. L. James?

Another major gripe I have with Fifty Shades of Grey is the chemistry between the two leads, Dakota

fiery demises, my only lasting thought would have been about whether the glider was insured or not. The rumours about the two actors absolutely hating each other in real life does intrigue me. Even though it sells itself as a story about rough sex, it’s still one about love at its core, meaning that no spark between the leads is a big problem.

So, what are the salvageable qualities here that makes me not hate Fifty Shades of Grey, unlike most other critics? I think it all comes down to curiosity. I never looked at my phone to check the time (my usual barometer of how badly a film is doing at holding my attention). I was motivated by wanting to know how far the film was willing to go with all the sex and BDSM stuff. It all turned out to be rather tame in the end, disappointingly.

Nevertheless, there was something enjoyable about not knowing.

At this point, it feels like I’m reviewing my experience rather than the film itself.

I’m OK with that, as Fifty Shades of Grey is a one-off cultural phenomenon. If you go to see it, you may enjoy it more or less than me, and I think that enjoyment will be down to who you go with, how drunk Photo: Universal Pictures you are, etc. I braved it on behalf of everyone I know and went to see it alone, and I Johnson and Jamie Dornan. I say chemistry, when I of still enjoyed it in a weird way. Bring on the sequels! course mean the vacuous lack of it. Their performances aren’t strictly wooden, but all they evoked in me was a constant awkwardness. I never once cared what happened to Anastasia or Christian. Had there been a malfunction during the glider plane scene, leading to their

Cornerhouse Pick of the Week

Love Is Strange Sarah Wolff says that this romance drama lives up to every word of its title emotional tone. The theme of homophobia is touched upon but never overarches the story as a whole since Sachs refuses to exploit the material in order to create dramatic tension.

A second romantic storyarch is introduced through the film’s obvious admiration for its setting. Love is Strange paints a Photo: Sony Pictures Classics refreshing picture of New York City, which seems almost plain The release of Ira Sachs’ drama Love in its sereneness and gives ‘The City is Strange marks the emergence of yet That Never Sleeps’ a sense of reality one another Manhattan love story. The film would imagine only a real New Yorker invites its audience to follow lifelong to be familiar with. As the characters couple Ben and George (convincingly take us wandering through the urban played by John Lithgow and Alfred haven we feel strangely at home and Molina), whose tale sets off cheerfully on the city doesn’t seem so sleepless after their wedding day. Their joy is however all. quickly spoilt when George loses his job The only minor incoherency arguably as music teacher at a Catholic school lies in the film’s ending, which appears due to his now lawfully authorised slightly superfluous and disruptive of relationship with Ben. Arising financial the general subtlety inherent to the problems force the newlyweds to give story, and could have potentially been up their Manhattan apartment. The Big more productive if left ambiguous.

Apple’s property market, into which However, it is easily relatable on an the film gives an insightful view, causes emotional level, succeeds in creating big problems which force the couple to a refreshingly genuine New York City separately move in with friends. Ben along the way and constitutes one of stays with his nephew’s family and the few examples of a love story that finds himself amidst teenage-anxieties doesn’t need a gendered genre tag to and work-related stress while George convey its message: Love is Strange is camps with a befriended couple of simply a beautifully subtle and heartyoung police officers that prove to felt tale about the strange powers of be party-loving social butterflies. mutual appreciation.

Despite their separation, Ben’s and George’s relationship remains the central stabilising pillar keeping the resulting chaos manageable. Being gay is represented in a pronouncedly unspectacular way which transmits the tenderness of the protagonists’ love for each other and sets the film’s quietly

You Can’t Handle the Truth!

Cinema Laughter Etiquette Eleanor Stead implores audiences to only laugh when appropriate during a movie Every frequent cinemagoer will be aware of the dramatic effect which audience reactions can have on a particular cinematic experience. Whilst the sense of shared viewing can add an extra dimension to a film, your personal reaction is necessarily moulded by those of the people around you. Admittedly, certain extreme audience reactions can be hilarious, as anyone who went to see Magic Mike can vouch for, but there are times when sitting with a group of people who are particularly prone to fits of giggles can prevent you from taking a film at all seriously (I’m still angry with myself for laughing through 90 per cent of Her).

Whilst ordinarily, over-the-top audience laughter is an irritating but largely harmless cinematic side-effect, there are some contexts in which it becomes not only a distracting reaction, but a disturbing one. This was particularly noticeable during my second viewing of the film Whiplash.

One of its most memorable scenes is Andrew’s first rehearsal with the studio band, when we first get a sense of the extreme dynamic of his relationship with his mentor. It’s important that this scene has an initially comedic tone; having laughed at Fletcher’s clever one-liners (“That is not your boyfriend’s dick. Do not come early”), we feel even more uncomfortable when we realise just how far he’s prepared to go.

However, countless slaps-in-the-face later, and the laughter produced by the audience at the cringe-worthily painful

Photo: Universal Pictures

insult “worthless friendless faggotlipped little piece of shit” is if anything even more uproarious. My response to this may be an overreaction, but sitting in a room full of people who seem to find a middle-aged man threatening to fuck a teenage boy like a pig to be the comedic event of the century is an unsettling experience.

This lack of empathy is, perhaps, indicative of a larger problem in cinema, as the majority of commercially successful films are very often so tailored to their target audience that they are made to fit uncompromisingly into a definite genre. It is unsurprising that this kind of lazy commercial filmmaking has produced a society of lazy and undiscerning viewers, who are unable to detect tonal changes or emotional nuance. Whilst it may seem an inane thing to moan about, people’s emotional reactions to art and their ability to empathise with fictional characters can say a lot about their interactions with others more generally.

More challenging cinema for the mass market is to be encouraged if such widespread voyeuristic tendencies are to be prevented.

5. A Parnsip – Ted (2012) Seth McFarlane’s first live action comedy took an interesting turn when the fluffy star of the film nonchalantly expains to his employer that before the latter caught him mid-coitus with his girlfriend, he had “fucked her with a parnsip and then sold that parsnip to a family of four.”

Children do need their veggies.

4. A Pie – American Pie (1999) American Pie appeals to the teenage male during his sexual awakening.

Among a great number of sexthemed gags, Jason Biggs’ short-lived romance with his mum’s pastry lives on in the comedy genre. If not the actual act, his father’s reaction to the events (“what are we gonna tell your mother?”) will leave you admiring the ingenuinity and complicity of men.

3. A Candle – The Wolf of Wall Street (2013)

Photo:Paramount Pictures

While this scene seems all but out of place next to the cocaine-infused orgies, witnessing Mr DiCaprio with a candle between his buns still tends to shock. It may be a good thing Leo has never won an Oscar, who knows where he’d put it...

2. A Rubber Glove – Fight Club (1999) You may not have noticed this handy tool as that would have required you to look past Brad Pitt’s exceptional six pack, but— unconventional as it may be—you have got to wonder how he used the darn thing to make Helena Bonham Carter exclaim “I haven’t been fucked like that since grade school.”

1. A Boxcutter – Gone Girl (2014) Rosamund Pike shines as the beautiful Amy Elliott Dunne in David

Photo: 20th Century Fox

Fincher’s latest thriller, but let me assure you that you would regret spending the night with her. She has been known to hide a boxcutter under her pillow and slice your throat in half before framing you as a rapist.

To each their own, I guess...

Arne Dumez

20

Books

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

/TheMancunion: Books @MancunionBooks

Editors: Leonie Dunn, Alister Pearson

Review

“Hawaiian Shirts in the Electric Chair” by Scott Laudati

Jack Ashworth writes, “Intensely readable and relatable, ‘Hawaiian shirts…’ manages to reach out to anyone who has felt disengaged and apathetic, and his work is tinged with hope.”

on linguistic ambiguity and technical jargon, the use of colloquial language gives the work a much more concentrated resonance. His lowercasing of ‘I’ which is present throughout attains a Cummingsesque effect, perhaps in homage.

Laudati channels a plethora of emotions as he navigates through the suburban jungle of New York. In ‘a garden east of eden’ his words are tinged with retrospect and longing;

Image: kunoapress.wordpress.com

‘if i could do it all over again there’s not much i would do the same I would say i love you a lot more to a lot less people i would only find brick walls on black and white streets to kiss against’

In ‘Hawaiian shirts in the electric chair’ Scott Laudati embodies the malaise of his generation. Desperately searching for purpose in a world engulfed by fear and disengagement, Laudati’s narrator – a character one can only assume to be entirely autobiographical – stumbles between fleeting one night stands (I Liked Her So I Never Should Have Talked To Her Again), doomed love affairs (Stony Hill) and suburban anxiety (Can We Live Like This?). The archetypal dissatisfied post-adolescent so prevalent in 20th century literature, his narrator bears resemblances to Salinger’s Holden Caulfield and Plath’s Esther Greenwood, all similarly dealing with lethargy and neurosis in the urban sprawl of New York.

Laudati focuses primarily on imagery and expression, and he does not rely on a great deal of literary technique – all usage of rhyme, metre and rhythm is subtle and sparse. This does not negate the work in anyway, but only accentuates the conversational and simplistic style exercised. Although lacking the mysticism and spirituality of other poetic greats such as Ginsberg, Laudati does seem to possess a beat-esque quality that can be interpreted as both hopeless and hopeful at the same time. In ‘we need the bomb’ he speaks of the threat of nuclear warfare, highlighting the cultural fear it entails but also adding a subversive eroticism to it;

There is also an appeal to more carnal desires; lust, greed, desire. In ‘The Things Men Say On Their Way To Work’ we are greeted by a seemingly middle aged man, who recounts tales of illicit encounters with numerous women – expressing his longing for his youth.

Intensely readable and relatable, ‘Hawaiian shirts…’ manages to reach out to anyone who has felt disengaged and apathetic, and his work is tinged with hope. Despite being set in a given geographical area, the poems have a universal resonance not exclusive to New York. Beautifully executed this work is indicative of a promising and prolific career for Scott Laudati.

‘for the andromedans, and the reptilians, watching from the moonit’ll probably look like the earth going blind with helpless orgasm’ Laudati’s choice of language remains simple throughout– and it is exactly this simplicity that gives this work its universality. Rather than relying

Review

“De Profundis” by Oscar Wilde

Alister Pearson writes why Oscar Wilde’s letter is the perfect reason why the 49000 men convicted of the ‘gross indecency’ law should be pardoned Stephen Fry is currently spearheading the campaign to get the Queen to pardon those who were persecuted of the ‘gross indecency’ law that plagued the minds and the justice system of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland for decades.

49000 men were wrongly imprisoned, made to suffer for no reason, and made to live with undeserved shame and guilt that led some to end their lives prematurely. They were given hormonechanging drugs and sterilised. All this because of their sexuality.

It is for these reasons why this petition needs to be heard, and its demands answered, because no person should be treated like this by their country just because of their sexuality.

Oscar Wilde is a literary hero of Stephen Fry. If you hear Fry talk about him in his recent show where he was promoting his new book, you realise what an inspiration Wilde is to him. His literary works enticed a young Fry, but it was his persecution of the ‘gross indecency’ law that helped Fry cope with his own homosexual feelings.

Wilde’s incarceration was just like any other, an innocent man thrown into jail, restricted of freedom and liberties all because he was gay. They took Wilde’s pen, and they took his books, but ultimately they took his life. The harsh conditions of prison, where the slogan was “Hard labour, hard fare, hard bed,” led to the deterioration of health for Wilde and he would die shortly after completing his sentence.

However, in prison Wilde was granted access to several books, and was allowed to write. Of the books he chose, many had spiritual meaning. Dante’s Divine Comedy enticed Wilde the most as well as the bible in three different languages. In between reading, and the hard labour, Wilde penned a letter to Lord Alfred Douglas, the man who he had once been so intimate with.

The letter would later be published in full and uncensored, under the name De Profundis, and is autobiographical detailing Wilde’s reflections on his life and what led him to being incarcerated, as well as his spiritual development that he underwent during his time in prison. The letter opens with a desperately sad statement: “...Suffering is one very long moment. We cannot divide it by seasons. We can only record its moods, and chronicle their return.

With us time itself does not progress. It revolves. It seems to circle round one centre of pain.”

The first half of the letter is dedicated to Wilde’s reflections on his time spent with Douglas where he reveals their tumultuous relationship, and how he traded a life of quiet intellect for his pursuit of “uncompleted passions, of appetite without distinction, desire without limit, and formless greed.” The letter reads like Wilde has a lot of angry regrets, that he blames Douglas for his descent into dedicating his life to carnal lusts which would lead to his imprisonment, but eventually he forgives Douglas.

The second half of the letter has more of an introspected focus that incorporates a religious awakening into Wilde as well as a realisation of what life could be about: “I have said of myself that I was one who stood in symbolic relations to the art and culture of my age. There is not a single wretched man in this wretched place along with me who does not stand in symbolic relation to the very secret of life. For the secret of life is suffering.”

This last remark just shows what prison can do to a human being.

Once a man who loved life, who wrote fantastic plays, degraded to despairing about his own time on earth, and all caused by being accused of ‘gross indecency’ by having a particular sexuality.

Considered in the context of Fry’s petition, Wilde’s letter is beautiful and effective in achieving an aim that probably was only tacitly targeted by the author himself: of detailing what it is like to suffer in jail for a breaking an unjust law. A key aspect of the petition is that we pardon every man, not just those who achieved spectacular things for their country like Turing, or who were outstanding in their fields, like Wilde, but because to suffer for something that is blatantly not a crime is perhaps the worst thing a judicial system can inflict, and to pardon these men is the only way of even slightly making up for an awful wrong. Yes, Wilde’s letter is unique, and perhaps he was the only man who was sentenced under the ‘gross indecency’ act who could write such a powerful message, but the message is universal of everyone who was imprisoned for the same reason as Wilde, and serves, what I believe to be, the most powerful reason why this petition must go through.

Image: wikimedia commons Photo: BBC Films

HOW WILL WE USE THEM?

YOU DECIDE...

On May 07 2015, the country will turn out to decide who governs for the next five years.

With around 100,000 students in Manchester, we could finally make our concerns heard over poor housing, high crime, extortionate tuition fees and more.

Even if you were registered last time, you must register to vote for these elections.

Register at: www.votebooster.org/register/umsu

20 014 4

22

Food & Drink

Editors: Ellie Gibbs, Adam Fearn

ISSUE 18/ 9th MARCH 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

Review: Spec-TAKK-ular Hester Lonergan reports on her favourite Northern Quarter coffee joint Visited 21st February 2015 Reviewing often seems a compromising exercise. Most of the time, I go to a restaurant or café with the express intention of recording my experience, noting the seating, the greeting, the atmosphere and documenting with detail the food I choose to fill my belly.

Though invariably stuffed, I somehow manage to come away feeling empty inside.

Judging every element of a meal can get old. Looking over my shoulder to make sure that I am not being judged for systematically photographing every single dish and drink in front of me makes me feel awkward (although I should feel right at home, considering the near-necessity of this procedure in contemporary dining). For me, it all detracts from the real time experience of the space.

When you spend all your time noticing, you don’t notice the gloriousness of just spending time.

It is because of this, I guess, that I have refrained until now from writing about Takk.

It is precious to me, my safe space where I truly zone out and enjoy the ride. Naturally, then, I decided to put my feet on the pedal and analyse precisely what I love not having to analyse.

Located on Tariff Street in the Piccadilly end of the Northern Quarter, Takk sits alongside Kosmonaut (great cocktails) and El Capo (cracking tapas, lovely staff and potent tequila) in an area which seems busier and bustlier each time I walk by. The stand-out venue for daytime hang-out, Takk serves superb coffee, their house roast coming from ‘Clifton Coffee’ in Bristol and the rest sourced from ‘The Barn’ in Berlin. Inspired by Scandinavian coffee houses (hence the name ‘Takk’ - Norwegian for thanks), their style of roasting allows for the original flavour of the beans to come through, resulting in light and fruity coffee which is a pleasure to drink black and lends itself beautifully to other additions. The coffee list, while short, reflects the passion of Takk’s staff to deliver impressive, uncompromised flavour.

If tea is more your bag, Takk’s selection of blends from ‘Canton Tea Co’ more than covers bases - on this occasion, I had a warm and spicy loose leaf black chai, my companion choosing an uplifting and relaxing peppermint. And if you don’t fancy anything hot (very suspicious considering it’s Manchester we’re talking about), an interesting array of fresh juices and soft drinks line the fridge behind the counter.

When it opened two years ago, Takk served simple breakfasts, pastries and Nordic-style open sandwiches. But since the expansion of the kitchen and recent addition of an extra chef, their culinary repertoire has evolved into something innovative, refreshing and delicious. During my usual late morning visits, I order wild field mushrooms and poached eggs on toasted rye bread. At bang on a fiver, its value in no way compromises its taste and quality. Ingredients are all locallysourced, manager Oli tells me; the bread and pastries are delivered fresh from cult Levenshulme bakery Trove, meat and fish from Frosts in Chorlton, and veg and extras from McCall’s Organics (a new addition to

Church Street Market on the other end of the Northern Quarter). Usually, I glug it all down with a ‘long black’, make multiple trips to fill my glass with the icy fruit-infused water laying in wait in big jugs on a side table, and spend the following hour or so contemplating my contentment.

On the morning in question, however, I decided to shake things up for the investigative purposes of the review. The brunch menu, available on weekends, offers a varied and eclectic mix of dishes, from lamb stew with almond breadcrumb crust and mint chimichurri to IPA-infused welsh rarebit. We greedily opted for a duck egg frittata with salmon and crème fraîche, a wild mushroom, cauliflower and quinoa salad, and a pot of dahl, kindly assured by the member of staff that our order wasn’t over-ambitious (still dubious).

The dishes came out quickly, and we cleared our mugs aside, mesmerised by the kaleidoscope of colours on each plate. The beauty of the dishes was matched by their tastes: the rich, velvety frittata disappeared almost instantly; the mellow and Tarka-spiced dahl lasted a little longer, while we marvelled at and savoured its garnish of pickled pink shallots and pomegranate seeds. But the winning dish was undoubtedly the salad. A loving patchwork of textures and flavours, authentically misshapen mushrooms and braised cauliflower smoky and strong enough to make us rethink the vegetable entirely and topped off by a fragrant and earthy tarragon, walnut and rocket pesto. We lingered over the plate as much as our willpower permitted us, but it probably took under ten minutes for us to polish off the lot While the trip in question was genuinely in order to review Takk, I admit that its outcome was a foregone conclusion. If you believe the (my) hype, go; if you don’t, go see it for yourself (or miss out). With coffee culture increasingly diversifying in Manchester (Ziferblat, PKB, Grindsmith), Takk’s scandicool menu and vibe reserves it a spot at the very top. Add in evening gigs, morning coffee tastings, and quite possibly the most passionate, welcoming and cheerful staff to have ever graced Tariff Street, Takk is the cream of a bounteous crop.

Long mornings and afternoons in Takk soothe my soul. Takk is where I go to feel at ease, to forget about analysing the food and the atmosphere. I know it like an old, yet hole-free and still surprisingly elasticated sock, which I intend to warm my feet with for the foreseeable future. With this, I implore you to do the same. Soak in the surroundings without marking your meal and snapshot the experience for your own memories, rather than for the electronic screens of others. Find your sacred space and cherish it. And if you are sure that your coffee-bond can withstand your shameful hypocrisy, write a review of it.

Takk, 6 Tariff Street, Manchester, M1 2FF http://www.takkmcr.com/

Photos: Ellie Gibbs Photos: Hester Lonergan

If you fancy your hand at food and drink journalism, whether it be interviews, recipes, reviews, or some interesting culinary anecdotes, email us at food.mancunion@outlook.com or get in touch via Facebook or Twitter .

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

The Mancunion: Food & Drink @MancunionFood

Food & Drink 23

Gourmet Bloody Mary

Pub of the Week: Temple

Review

‘Hail Mary, Full of Trace... Minerals’ Tom Bruce shows us how to spice up our lives (read:tomato juice) with another cocktail.

Best Served with: Cannibal Holocaust (1980)

You will have passed this place on the way to town and thought ‘oh, that’s that bar that used to be a toilet’. Formerly known as the ‘Temple of Convenience’. Yes, it used to be a Victorian public toilet. Yes, it still smells a little like one. However, step down into this microbar and you will find a dark and dingy boozer where we would be happy to drink away an evening. Arty décor and an older, trendy and highly conversational crowd lend this place a bohemian atmosphere. If you fancy a scribble, there’s a self-confessed DIY art gallery in the toilets. Standing at the bar on a busy night sipping on a Krombacher puts us in the mind of being in a café on the continent – right up until you ascend up into the drizzle. Guy Garvey from Elbow drinks here too. The grounds for divorce lyric ‘there’s a hole down which of late I cannot help but fall’ is an explicit reference to Temple Bar

Components: -2oz vodka -5oz plum tomato juice -Juice of half a lemon - 1 tsp hot Sauce - 1tsp Worcester sauce - Sprinkling celery salt - Sprinkling Ground Black Pepper - ½ oz gherkin pickling brine - Gherkin Slices -Celery stalk -Sundried tomato sliver - Stuffed Green Olives

Drink? They have Krombacher, Tuborg and for some reason John Smiths on tap.

It’s a little pricey, but with a nice selection of foreign bottles too – most notably DeEaten anywherelirium nicetremens. re-

About If you think these few delectable additions to the Bloody Mary classic formula are a tad overzealous, then you should check out Jamie Oliver’s version over on his YouTube channel Drinks Tube.

Seriously, check it out, he goes mental. It’s a Bloody Meal Replacement is what it is. He turns it into a rainforest, then dunks some bacon in for good measure. Bacon, as a garnish. And then, almost as an afterthought, he slits the throat of a newborn lamb over top.

Method In this order, fill your serving glass (no ice yet): Two or three pinches celery salt; two or three pinches cracked black pepper; juice from half a freshly squeezed lemon (roughly 1 oz/ml); a teaspoon of Tobasco or equivalent; a teaspoon of Worcester sauce; half an ounce of strained pickling brine, the kind you get in gherkin jars. Top up with ice, clamp on a shaking tin, and tip back and forth several times. Leave the cocktail in the tin as you fill up the glass with clean ice, then strain in the tin’s contents. A celery stalk, a couple of gherkin slices, and a sundried tomato speared between two olives all float on top. A lemon slice on the rim and an ample sprinkling of black pepper and then it’s ready to eat. You can also drink it, if you’d like.

Sam Joyce & Charlie Filmer-Court go underground on Oxford Rd for a drink and a history lesson.

cently? Created Get something there: Get the bus to Town and hop off at Oxford road station, you’ll see it oppositeto theknow!

Tesco Express. delicious? We want Tell us about it at food.mancunion@outlook.com

Photo: The Mancunion

100 Great Bridgewater Street, Manchester M1 5JW Photo: ManchestersFinest

The Byron Burger Club brings Patty Meltdown to Manchester To celebrate the opening of their second restaurant in the city, in Piccadilly Gardens, Byron are bringing their sell-out event, Patty Meltdown, to both of their Manchester restaurants this March.

Over two nights, Byron head chef Fred Smith diner fare at its best.” will be serving up his own take on the mutant offspring of a cheese toastie and a hamburger - much-loved in the States, but rarely seen on this side of the Atlantic: the Patty Melt.

Simplicity is key to the Patty Melt: two slices of buttered rye bread with caraway seeds sandwich a loosely-ground beef patty topped with slow-cooked red onions and Swiss cheese, all grilled in a heavy-duty griddle.

Fred’s Patty Melt will be served with a pot of Russian dressing and sweet potato fries, as well as spiced popcorn to start, and a sticky toffee rum hard shake to finish.

“The origins of the Patty Melt are lost in the mists of time, but it seems to have originated in the 1940s or 50s at a chain of Californian coffee shops called Tiny Naylor’s, run by William ‘Tiny’ Naylor,” explains Fred. “I wanted to create a Byron take on something I remember fondly from my many trips around the States, the Patty Melt is traditional, unpretentious

Photo:Frangafung @Flickr

Photo:Tripadvisor

Patty Meltdown will be held at Byron Deansgate and their brand new restaurant, Byron Piccadilly Gardens, which will open on 6th March.

Every Byron’s design is unique: Byron Piccadilly Gardens will evoke the bustling diners of Midtown, New York City. The restaurant will feature classic décor including black and white details, caramel leather banquette seating and a tiled, chequered floor, with warm, low level lighting illuminating the space. The open kitchen and bar will provide a focal point, completed by a mixture of vintage and contemporary furniture and fittings.

Patty Meltdown tickets are priced at £15.

Tickets go on sale in late February. Sign up to the Burger Club and pick Manchester as your nearest restaurant.

24

Arts & Culture

ISSUE 16/ 23rd February 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM /TheMancunionArtsCul@ArtsMancunion

Editor: Holly Smith Review

A Look InsideWhitworth Art Gallery’s Reopening

Bullets, gunpowder and ‘Tits in Space’, Robert Firth explores Manchester’s much loved art gallery as the Whitworth finally reopens Since its foundation in 1889, the of her bawdy sculptures set to Whitworth has had one modest a backdrop of the wallpaper aim: “the perpetual gratification installation ‘Tits in Space’ (2000). of the people of Manchester.”

Most provoking, are the selection It’s a purpose not forgotten of Lucas’ famous bunny girl in its £15 million renovation. sculptures, in which tights stuffed The galleries, of which over with cotton wadding are arranged half are now naturally lit, in positions of passivity over have become tranquil retreats chairs. They’re complimented beyond the roar of Oxford Road. with straightforward allusions A grinning team of staff and to war, commercialism and volunteers are at hand with help death, see the GI helmet as though of your own personal covered in Coca-Cola packaging. staff. Best of all, the exhibitions The overload of connotations which they have opened with, and possibilities that Lucas’ don’t have the effect of scaring exhibition hits you with can be you off: ‘Tits in Space’, gunpowder overwhelming. L u c k i l y explosions and squashed cutlery Wallpaper curator Amy George are all interesting at face value. was on hand with an excellent Downstairs, Cornelia Parker has introductory talk on the exhibition her largest solo exhibition to date. that advised not to read too much Parker is fascinated making into the work. Advice worth Archives New with Zealand@Flickr everyday objects unrecognisable. heeding, especially if you don’t Check out ‘12 nails and a Bullet’ want to spend your entire visit (2015): lead from a bullet is drawn occupied by working out Lucas’ into a wire square by mapping extremely ambiguous work. the contours of twelve nails. Like The new landscape gallery is this, much of Parker’s work forces dominated by Chinese artist Cai you to reconsider the boundaries Guo Quiang’s forty five meter and possibilities of objects. long, encircling work ‘Unmanned Nothing is as it seems and a stroll Nature’ (2008). Made from through Parker’s exhibition is scorch marks left by gunpowder guaranteed to disconcert you. explosions on Japanese Yet her work can paradoxically hemp paper, it is without a allure you too. In the stunning doubt the highlight of the and immersive ‘War Room’ (2015), Whitworth’s opening exhibitions. a light bulb lit room is draped in Upon entering the installation perforated paper left over from you’re transported to an the making of paper poppies. interstellar landscape, charred The rose glow enthralls, yet yet peaceful. Issues of history unevenness counterbalances and national identity are this effect because of the suggested by the materials moiré effect of the paper. and context of production.

Upstairs, YBA Sarah Lucas’ Gunpowder, a Chinese invention, exhibition ripostes the male is reimagined as a material of dominated 1960s exhibition creative production for a work next door to it, with a selection produced for the Hiroshima

Art Prize. The work is now displayed outside of Japan for the first time, at the Whitworth.

If you visit, you’ll notice that the Whitworth doesn’t feel like an art gallery. There are no gauche creaks and slamming from closing doors (the only door I went through was the entrance). The abundance of natural light means you don’t feel like a spotlighted patient in an operating theatre as often is the case with galleries.

The portrait exhibition has probably the most unusual layout: it is multilevel and the portraits are unlabeled, arranged freely across the walls. This design allows you to scan the portraits and focus in more freely on them than with a symmetrical display. However, the paper labelled diagrams which replaced the portrait labels were pretty confusing, and it was easy to mix up which artist and title matched up to which portrait.

The portrait exhibition is described by the gallery as a glimpse of the people who’ve made the Whitworth over the years. The theme of a community that has made the Whitworth is continued in Johnie Shand Kydd’s intimate photographs of members of the art world holidaying on the island of Hydra, by invitation of Whitworth patron Pauline Karpidas. The Whitworth has burst from its more than two yearlong transformative cocoon as a beautiful and welcoming space for creative exploration and enjoyment.

Exhibiton

Photo of the Week Bunny Girl Sculpture, Sarah Lucas. Photo: The Mancunion

Photo of The Week

Photograph Of The Week This Photograph is from Holly Smith, a second year Spanish and German student. If you would like to enter Photo Of The Week, e-mail us your photographs at: mancunion.arts@gmail.com

Theatre

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

Review

Top Hat

Matthew Gormley

Photo: @TopHatOnStage

The golden age of Hollywood was truly alive in the city, when the Oliver-Award winning musical Top Hat came to the Manchester Opera House. The show opened in the West End in 2012 to mixed reviews, but quickly won over the nation and became the must-see musical throughout its eighteen-month sell-out run, picking up the prestigious Olivier Award for Best New Musical 2013. Now, as part of its first major national tour, the all-singing all-dancing Irving Berlin spectacular rolled into Manchester.

Based on the 1935 film of the same name, Top Hat tells the story of American dancer Jerry Travers (Alan Burkitt) who comes to London to star in a show produced by Horace Hardwick (Clive Hayward), finds his true love in the form of Dale Tremont (Charlotte Gooch) and fights for her affections whilst trying to make a success of his show. They do say the course of true love never runs smooth, and this is certainly true in Alan’s case, with hilarious consequences.

The original RKO Motion Picture film starred the incomparable Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers, who I’m sure you will agree, are irreplaceable when it comes to the razzmatazz of ballroom dancing. The movie was such a hit that it led to a string of follow-up musicals starring the pair and cemented them in the nation’s hearts as one of the most famous and best-loved partnerships of all time. Top Hat was the pair’s most successful film and when you see this stage version, it is clear to see why. Combining the glamour of 1930s Hollywood with the glitz of London’s West End and the beautiful Italian city of Venice, this stunning production features timeless tunes such as Puttin’ On the Ritz, I’m Putting All My Eggs in One Basket and Cheek To Cheek.

Alan Burkitt is sublime in the lead role of Jerry Travers.

Alan’s CV boasts a long and impressive list of musical theatre credits. He has previously starred in Singing In The Rain, 42nd Street and We Will Rock You, to name just a few. He is a sublime dancer with impeccable timing and the fastest moving feet I’ve ever seen. Tap dancing is something I’ve always wanted to be able to do, but I don’t think even a lifetime of training would

Comedy

Stewart Lee

Self-billed ‘90s comedian’ and ‘41st best stand up ever’– Stewart Lee – returned to Salford’s Lyric Theatre on Saturday afternoon with A Room with a Stew. His distant, arrogant, passive-aggressive onstage persona culminated in him declaring to the audience, “no one is equipped to review me”. This is because no one can fully understand the nuances of a performance of “high risk Brechtian theatre” – which is exactly what his routine intended to be.

The routine consisted of half an hour of “Islamaphobic observational comedy” (in response to public demand), half an hour on urine, 45 minutes on UKIP, and finally, the Stewart Lee staple: the state of comedy. The state of comedy ‘bit’ was accompanied by the customary mental breakdown.

Any authentic review will either discard Lee’s routine as contemptuous, snobbish, monotone rubbish; or it’ll paint him as something like the 21st century’s greatest stand-up.

To demonstrate some sort of balance, most broadsheet newspapers will give him a rating ranging from 3.5 to 4 stars; in which the Platonic moral guardian (or journalist) describes Lee as a cult figure gone mildly mainstream – revered by some, loathed by others. This doesn’t represent anyone’s opinion of ‘Stew’ – the mean of opinion but certainly not the median.

The show then began with a 15 minute introduction outlining the structure of the show and ridiculing two latecomers in the front row for buying their tickets on Gumtree for £80: “It’s not worth 80 quid, this. It’s barely even worth the 21 quid everyone else paid.” Lee also displayed antipathy towards people bringing friends and lovers – an action that was seen to compromise audience quality. He described his ideal audience as one which responded to every joke with, “well, it’s a complex issue”, and one which had passed a history exam on arrival at the venue.

As Lee stated in his TV series last year: “I’m not interested in laughs. I’m interested in creating a temporary liberal consensus that bursts on contact with air.” As “the Lee Mack of cultural relativism”,

allow me to reach the standard displayed by our leading man.

Charlotte Gooch is the Ginger to Alan’s Fred, oozing charm and sophistication in the role of Dale Tremont.

Charlotte was also part of the cast during the show’s time in the West End and it’s fairly obvious why the producers were so keen to ask her back. Charlotte has recently completed a run playing the lead role of Penny Johnson in Dirty Dancing at the Piccadilly Theatre in London, and she also appeared in UK tours of Grease and Cats. The partnership of Gooch and Alan is pure magic. When they danced together, the hairs on the back of my neck stood tall; it was as though they had stepped straight out of the television screen and onto the stage.

The rest of the cast are perfectly suited to their roles. As a company, they are charming, captivating and elegant.

Mixed in with the high kicks and flicks are plenty of comedy moments, which are especially brought to life by the hilarious John Conroy, who stars as Bates, Horace’s meddling English valet.

The sets are a spectacle within themselves, brilliantly designed by Hildegard Bechtler. The breathtaking scenery makes you feel as though are in the middle of the magnificent scenes, and the set changes are slick and perfectly intertwined with the song and dance. I have been wanting to see Top Hat ever since it opened in the West End three years ago. It was worth the wait, and I was certainly not disappointed. With a run time of two hours and forty minutes, it is quite a lengthy show, but its fast and fluid nature makes the evening fly by. My personal favourite song, Let’s Face The Music And Dance, is executed to the perfection and made me wish I was around during the era of these wonderful Hollywood films.

For any fans of traditional song and dance, this show is not to be missed. So, don your top hat and dig out your tails for this sparkling production that is guaranteed to leave you feeling as though you’re in heaven. Top Hat is a musical masterpiece.

Something is brewing

Tom Learmouth

Lee delivered his signature mix of Ted Chippingtonstyle lowbrow and multifaceted highbrow.

When north of the Watford Gap, Lee deliberately constructs an onstage persona of ‘social difference’ – in which the audience are comically treated with utter contempt. At the Lowry, his core following of “liberal Guardian readers” represented less the norm and more a diaspora. Furthermore, he suggested that all the young people present in the audience should leave, and return to their hobbies of Minecraft and bondage sex.

The show’s funniest moment came when the latecomers were asked to name an obscure country carrying no cultural stereotypes. The Gumtree customers chose Qatar – the choice was reluctantly accepted. Twenty minutes on, his friend Lesley only recently discovering he was in fact Qatari followed. This was in spite of the fact that Lesley had participated in stereotypical Qatari traditions all his life – for example, setting fire to a puffin in a peddle bin, the ritual of pouring 19 month old beakers of urine while humming ‘Three Lions’, listening to Qatari radio under the bedclothes in the 1970s (this included Stew making goat noises for 5 continuous minutes), and nailing a fez to a llama’s head.

Harking back to his own satirical categorisation of satire as “anything with animals in it” in last year’s Comedy Vehicle, the hilarious UKIP routine revolved around his cat, named ‘Paul Nuttalls from the UKIPs’, and included 200 mini England flags and no toilet paper. Stew lives in multicultural Hackney – a London borough he describes as “like Jerusalem but more violent”. His three closest ‘neighbours’ are a 70 year old Rastafarian, an 85 year old Pakistani, and a 95 year old Jew – all of which were featured in the UKIP section. After accusing comedy audiences (“like you people”) of murdering “all the dead comedians” due to inconsistent reactions to jokes, a heckler smugly suggested ‘Stew’ take his own life.

Ten seconds of genuine anger from Lee followed.

Despite this moment of antagonism, A Room with a Stew was a hilarious and hugely entertaining show.

25|02|2015

17:00, THE UNION BAR

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Lifestyle

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2014 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

Editors: Kitty Treverton Jones, Molly Allen Manchester Life

Overheard The Manchester University of Manchester The funniest things you’ve been saying around campus this week

Bucket List

Whether you’re in your final year or your first, now is the time to start making the most of the best city in the country. Sarah Heaton gives you a guide to the things you need to do in Manchester before you leave

“What’s the difference between bondage and S&M?”

Food and Drink Visit both Archie’s and/or all 3 Abdul’s in one night Pretend to be a cyclist (or some other kind of good person) in order to score some free food outside the Union Eat at Aladdin’s in Didsbury No, really, eat at Aladdin’s in Didsbury Visit the Richmond Tea Rooms for some high class afternoon merriment Pretend to be super rich and have a cocktail at Cloud 23 at the top of the Hilton

Overheard on the bus

“You’ll never see me wearing Adidas, I hate Adidas, they take food from children for money.”

Arts and Culture Get

into the studio audience at Jeremy Kyle (and proudly share a screenshot of your TV debut with everyone ever) Do a graffiti walk of the Northern Quarter Declare

yourself ‘totally over’ Parklife, make plans for a full weekend of Grand Designs but then succumb to FOMO at the last minute and hunt down a ticket at treble face value Go and watch a foreign film at the Cornerhouse (and leave with a slight superiority complex towards the uncultured plebs on the street)

Overheard in the Sam Alex computer cluster

“I don’t wear jeans, they’re so generic.”

Overheard in Univresity Place

“If I had unlimited power and I could change anything in the world, honestly the first thing I’d do is replace those shit excuses for water fountains in the Library”

Photo: marcus_jb1973@Flikr

Nights Out

Pangaea.

Enough said.

Attend

at least one house party that ends up discussed on national news/ BuzzFeed/in parliament Go to a concert at the Albert Hall Fall

asleep on the Magic Bus coming back, ideally scoring a ride home afterwards Get

kicked out of Factory for labelling the bouncers homophobic/racist Lose

a shoe to the floor of HMV Ritz Go to Warehouse Project, lose all of your friends, abandon any hope of finding them and make new ones instead

Overheard in the Union

Miscellaneous

“I really feel like I am garlic.”

Overheard in 256

“Maybe she’s in the mood for a flaccid penis.”

Overheard outside the Learning Commons

“Movement is the spice of life.”

Overheard on the bus

“Weetabix is the blank canvas on which I can express my creativity.”

Overheard in Fallowfield

Photo: weihnachtenlustig.blogspot.co.uk

Around University

Make

your way onto the Spotted page and revel in your 15 minutes of fame Have

a sleepover in Ali G Go at least a week on salt/pepper/toilet roll/cutlery you stole from the Library Check

out the view at sunset from the Simon Building sixth floor computer cluster Become

a BNOC (Big Name on Campus) – organise a club night, make loads of friends, run for GenSec and generally be a social butterfly Graduate?

Photo: kittytj@Instagram

“I don’t want a boyfriend as such, I just want someone who will pay for my Chicken King after a night out.”

Photo: kittytj@Instagram

Photo: kittytj@Instagram

Want to write for Lifestyle?

Overheard in Fallowfield Overheard anything hilarious this week?

Tweet us @MancunionLife

Secure

a home visit from Crazy Bus Lady (or Kunshal, as she’s known to her true friends) Play

a game of Selfie Bingo with the staff of Fallowfield’s greatest takeaways Get

a spontaneous piercing from Afflecks Play

My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding at Pastiche

E-mail: mancunion.life@gmail.com

Photo: Elina Baltina (Flickr)

Meetings: Thursdays at 5pm, 1st Floor of the Students’ Union

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2014 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

The Mancunion: Lifestyle @MancunionLife

Finance Features

Free the nipple piercing Lauren Howells bares the boob in the name of nipple piercings

Photo: Zokete @Flickr

Take a short stroll down Oxford Road, and chances are most of the people walking past you will have some type of piercing. Ears, nose, lip, eyebrow – with Manchester being a free-thinking and fashion forward city, we’ve pretty much seen it all. But what about what you don’t see? I’m talking about nipple piercings, specifically on women. Kind of sexy? None of your damn business? Or just a bit gross?

Well, in my (admittedly biased) opinion, nipple piercings are cool.

When you mention to people that you have one, you obviously get the odd “Oh my God, why?”

- notably when you’re dropping

T

Stereotypes

the bombshell on your mother.

But generally, people are more curious than anything, because it’s just not something that comes up in conversation. You get asked a lot of questions: “Did it hurt?” – Yes, “Does that mean you won’t be able to breastfeed?” – Um, no.

Although most of the time the reaction is an interested “Oh my god, can I see?”

Before having my nipple pierced, my response to being asked to flash my boob would have been a resounding no, and maybe it’s knowing that I was brave enough to get fairly naked and have a stranger stick needles in me, or maybe it’s just because

I like how it looks, but suddenly I have a lot more confidence in my own body.

Also, anyone who’s ever had anything pierced will know how great the adrenaline rush is afterwards, and the satisfaction you get if you’ve had to psych yourself up to go through with it. And just so you know, for a lot of people a piercing in that area can heighten sensitivity. I don’t know about you, but anything that feels good for me is, well, good for me! What can I say? The bionic boob might just be worth the uncomfortable explanations in airport security.

Lifestyle

27

Too close for comfort?

Josepha Griffin Parry on what it’s like to have a sibling living in the same university city.

In September, my brother started at Man Met. Initially, I was pretty happy about this set up; we’ve always been pretty close as far as siblings go but we haven’t permanently lived in the same city in over 3 years so it was bound to be a different experience.

I started to get the incessant phone calls from my parents almost as soon as term started asking if I’Alchemist d seen my brother, if he’d Photo: The got a job yet, if he’d joined the rugby team, if he was enjoying his course, if he was going to lectures, if he was going out too much. The list goes on. It was exhausting and I began to feel less like his sister and more like his guardian or parent. As he is a 19 year old who had already been away for 9 months, I tried to reassure my parents that he would be fine and not to worry. However, the more indoctrinated he became with the “FRESHAZ” attitude the less he seemed to communicate with my parents; which only multiplied the amount of phone calls I was receiving.

Along with this, after hurling himself into Manchester nightlife, my brother decided to start bombarding me with texts asking me if me and my “crew” (housemates) were going out.

However, now that I am living in a house of fourth years, the

days of going out every weekday have come to an end. Now we must follow the new mantra of “smashing out work in the week” in order to “let loose” over the weekend. This did not seem to cross his mind and I continued to receive messages well into first semester, although the occasional night out with him and his friends is absolutely hilarious.

Bumping into him at Pangaea after he had jumped the fence was pretty weird considering I had no idea he was going to be there. That’s the thing with having a sibling in such close proximity to you - you never know when they’re going to pop up (or pop to your house

Photo: Sean Drelinger @Flickr

seeking a free meal).

January brought with it the mid-first year blues of: ‘I hate my course’, ‘I miss my home friends’, and basically ‘I have too much time on my hands and am constantly bored’. Becoming the fountain of all knowledge once more, I advised him to get a hobby that wasn’t just vodka, get out of his man cave, and maybe cut down on the 5+ Abduls a week he was indulging in. One month on and I think he’s recovering, learning that moderation is the key to everything at uni. Being in the same city can be tiring but it’s also really fun and really great to have some family close by.

On February 26th, we will light up the city of Manchester, amplify our voices and say ‘No!’ to Sexual Violence Against Women. Meet at Owen’s Park, Wimslow Road, Fallowfield at 7pm!

Followed by an afterparty at the University of Manchester Students’ Union

manchesterstudentsunion.com/reclaimthenight

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

SPORT

/TheMancunion

Sports Editors: Andrew Georgeson, Will Kelly

@Mancunion_Sport

Contact: sport@mancunion.com

29

Time to turn off?

Andrew Georgeson laments the current standard of TV punditry Andrew Georgeson Sport Editor

Giggs.

It may seem like a throw away comment, but it is a dangerous idea to plant into the idea of young British Television football punditry is falling footballers watching that skill and behind the pace of the game. precision should be punished, in favour That’s not to say it’s all bad, Sky’s for the kind of football that Vinnie Monday Night Football is excellent, Jones’s Wimbledon team or ‘dirty Leeds’ however, more and more we are seeing would have been proud of. outrageous statements.

This sentiment was repeated, again This is not to say that they are saying on BBC FA Cup coverage, in the Aston things which we I disagree with, more Villa match. A dearth of a game against they are saying things that are simply Midland rivals Leister, lacking any skill, not correct. precision or even desire, had one key Let’s take Phil Neville, a cotalking point- a particularly hard tackle commentator for BBC who we all from Aston Villa’s Ciaran Clark on love because he’s took a lot of flak at Leister’s Jeffrey Schlupp. Robbie Savage the world cup for being admittedly immediately praised the tackle for the rubbish, then actually got a bit better passion, the intensity and pointed out and was rejoiced. The past few weeks he got the ball. The thing is, regardless he has been saying some increasingly of what you think of the rules regarding confusing statements. The first came tackles, we must respect them, and it when Arsenal played Brighton in the was simply a red card. Clark was off his FA Cup. Arsenal’s Tomas Rosicky pulled feet, studs up, and lunged into Schlupp all the strings in that match, looking making him physically do a front flip. nowhere near the 34 years of his age.

After the match Lineker and Shearer Despite his sensational performance, in the Match of the Day studios also Neville suggested that he would have praised the tackle, but we all know that if ‘two footed’ the Czech. The reason either of those players were tackled like for this was simply because Rosicky that they would want the culprit sent off. had done a ‘no look pass.’ Neville, who Perhaps it was because the match played in one of the greatest footballing was boring, but perhaps, and probably legacies of all time- Fergie’s ‘Class of more likely, I think our confidence in the ’92- said he would have two footed a national game is so low, we are reluctant Skills.For.MANC.QUART.pdf 1 13/02/2015 09:35 player for showing skill, despite playing to develop flair players, and want hard with players like Beckham, Scholes and

tackles, no nonsense football. That is why Tim Sherwood incidentally got the job at Aston Villa, but that is another argument.

A pertinent example of inadequate punditry also came when Alan Pardew left Newcastle United.

The reaction against the Newcastle fans was bizarre. They were called delusional morons who didn’t know what they want. Alan Curbishley and Paul Merson were on Sky Sports the day after he left for London club Crystal Palace. When asked why Newcastle fans didn’t like Pardew, Merson responded, ‘probably because he was Southern.’

A man, who is a professional pundit, said that it was simply because he was Southern; people in Newcastle didn’t like him. Curbishley agreed calling Newcastle fans ‘fickle’, without admitting that he would give his right arm to be near the Newcastle job, or any job for that matter. It was also an odd statement from a man who was heartbroken after leaving Charlton because fans had European, mainly because of the great work he had done there.

The main problem with the media’s representation is twofold. The first is that they portrayed the North, well anywhere past Watford Junction, as a being a backwards land of simpletons, working on the fields for a living, before taking off their shirts to shout at a Southern

manager. I question whether they would have said this about a different nationality or culture. Second, is they simply ignored the facts. They ignored that Yohan Cabaye kept Newcastle up last season despite leaving in January, they ignored that Pardew had the lowest win rate, conceded the most goals, scored the second least amount of goals of any Premier League team in 2014.

They ignored the lies of Pardew, the terrible tactics, the horrendous affairs at the club, and just focussed on the fact that Pardew was Southern.

This article isn’t supposed to be slam all sport on TV, nor individuel pundits personally. I’m not so paranoid that I would want to burn bridges that I one day hope to cross, but it is getting to a point where alot of what pundits say is simply incorrect. Sky Sports is a subscription service, BBC Sport is paid for via a TV licence, and frankly sometimes I feel short changed. The greatest cup competition in the world, the FA Cup, isn’t even being covered properly anymore. The BBC are so desperate to show Premier League games they aren’t showing this year’s underdogs Bradford, yet BT Sports, a company that comes under intense criticism for their coverage, have agreed to show it for free. FA Cup coverage is also rife with inaccuracy. When Gateshead played early stars Warrington Town

Photo: Wikimedia Commons

the commentator said ‘Gateshead’s attendance is usually 300, 400.’ Just by looking at the club’s website you can see that the average attendance is nearly 2000 a match. That isn’t even fact only supporters would know, that is basic research.

So football punditry has a long way to come. Two immediate rooms for improvement however, if producers are reading, let some women be pundits.

It’s disgusting that in 2015 the blonde, tight fitted dressed women present the news, but you never see a player in the commentary box. And second, please boys, just do your homework

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‘Racism is not something that just gets eradicated’ Will Kelly discusses the resurgance of racism in the modern game Will Kelly Sports Editor Instead of talking about the PSG vs Chelsea match and how boring the game was, the events that happened before the match have very much taken the headlines. There were just short of 2000 Chelsea supporters in Paris on Tuesday. One of them did something utterly disgraceful, pushing a black man off a crowded Métro train. A handful of on looking Chelsea fans laughed, cheered and celebrated this despicable act with a chant about how they were “racist- and that’s the way we like it, we like it, we like it.”

A British expat onlooking the events disgusted by their boorish antics managed to capture this on video before sending the footage to a newspaper, who published it online later in the evening.

Within an hour, it had gone viral. The next morning the French police had opened an investigation, with the French Prime Minister declaring the incident “extremely disturbing and very worrying”. What is awful is that the victim, named as Souleymane S, has said in an interview that he was not particularly surprised by the abuse because he “lives with racism.”

The mindless action of this handful of idiots- one aggressor, several followers in a packed Métro carriage- led to the vexing question if this was a symptom of a wider problem in Chelsea’s fan base, in English football, in British society or all three. Football’s society has always mirrored British society- or perhaps most certainly English society. We are not a society made up of pleasant pasture green lands and merry villages

that stand idyll, barely developed from the pre-industrial vision of England.

We as a society, have a large amount of morons. You only have to see that on certain holidays one goes out on. It is embarrassing to say the least.

We have come a long way from the hooliganism that was rife through the 1970s and early 1980s. It makes sense perhaps to even go far to label the sport as ‘egalitarian’, as it has become too removed from its working class roots after the extortionate ticket price increases of the past decade.

Some of my housemates labelled those responsible in Paris as “typical football fans”. But these sentiments are utterly absurd. To talk of a “typical” football fan- or indeed a “typical” Chelsea fan- would be generalising about a socially, ethnically, politically diverse group.

Football itself has a massive problem.

If those that were involved in the racist act hadn’t been labelled as football fans their behaviour might have gained less media attention. The game’s popularity means that this controversy is amplified or exaggerated by the intensity of the public and media glare.

If those members of British society are dismissed as football’s problem, diagnosed as football’s ill, then football would have to re-intensify its battle against racism and discrimination in all its forms. There are some who imagined that we had seen the back of monkey chanting and banana throwing that greeted the first black players in this country during the 1980s. But it has taken the events of the last few years to spell out the depressing concern that xenophobic behaviour- in English football, as in society, it seems- appears

Stamford Bridge has had issues with racism in the past.

Photo: Wikimedia Commons

to be on the rise again.

QPR manager Chris Ramsey, who himself is black, believes that, “as much as it is something that has happened in football, these are really social issues that manifest themselves in the real world. Racism is not something that gests eradicated; it gets shuffled about and hidden in places you wouldn’t believe”.

Chelsea has done a lot of work in the community promoting equality programmes. Yet one of the most disturbing things about what happened in Paris was the insistence of a 17 year old Chelsea fan, not in the video but

on the train, was that the chant was not directed at the black man they had pushed off the train but “a song about John Terry”. That would be a lesser heard chant that might suggest that Chelsea’s supporters love Terry because of his own race-related incident in 2011.

Does this mean that there is a section of Chelsea fans that would use him as a means to celebrate racism? Even if only one person induces such craven behaviour, it would be one person too many.

What happened in Paris is just the latest in a string of moments brought to light by the ubiquity of smartphones and

the quick wits of those who own them.

There was the unsavoury barracking of Arsène Wenger, the Arsenal Manager, as he waited at Stoke on Trent train station after a defeat. David Sullivan, the West Ham co-owner, was confronted with a barrage of abuse after his sides 4-0 loss to West Brom. The worrying thing is, this is not new behaviour from football fans.

At last, we are able to document this and bring it to attention. But now that we are able to see it, we are hopefully able to stop it and to certainly kick out racism for good.

The Sherwood solution

Tom Cheetham backs the eccentric Englishman to restore Aston Villa’s former glory Aston Villa fans cry no more; your saviour is here (Disclaimer: if he does not save you or your season I am very sorry). Sherwood has been linked with every Premier League job since his sacking by Tottenham in the summer, most of the links seem to be have been postulated by Sherwood himself, but that is by the by. One thing that you cannot deny Tim Sherwood is that he is confident that he is the man to lead his team to triumphs.

I think that the Sherwood—Villa combination is a perfect match and I’ll just briefly explain why I have come up with this immaculate thesis. Aston Villa do not score goals, when Sherwood was in charge at Spurs they scored on average 1.8 goals per game. The main problem Villa had under Paul Lambert was the serious lack of goals; this is a team with Christian Benteke, who 18 months ago scored 19 Premier League goals in a season. Could Tim Sherwood have the same impact on Benteke that he did on Emmanuel Adebayor? I don’t see why not.

Another benefit that Sherwood will bring to Villa that Paul Lambert perhaps lacked is charisma and motivation skills.

Say what you like about Tim Sherwood, but I don’t know many people (apart

The ‘Headmaster’ will try to solve Aston Villa’s troubles infront of goal Photo: Wikimedia Commons

from my Dad and Sports Editor—Mr Georgeson) who will be sad to see him returning to Match of the Day every weekend. This is the man who provides the million-dollar quote regularly, my personal favourite is regarding his criticism of his own players: “They’re all men, they know I’m saying it from the heart, not from a script, but on impulse. I shoot from the hip.” This quote perfectly encapsulates what I said about Sherwood, he will perhaps

rub some people up the wrong way, but he will get the best out of players and let them know where he stands. This is in perfect contrast with Paul Lambert (who I would like to go on record and say I think he is a great manager), who despite his successes at Wycombe and Norwich has gone stagnant at Villa. Lambert often appeared to lack charisma in post match press conferences, and particularly of late, appeared to be a broken man, who realised that he was

walking the tightrope.

Another huge plus Sherwood will bring to Villa that he so successfully implemented at Spurs is his use of young players. Sherwood gave more playing time to Harry Kane last year, and we all know how that has gone, I will admit though a lot of that I also believe to be due to Mauricio Pochettino. Sherwood also made Nabil Bentaleb a regular at Spurs, Bentaleb has since gone on to represent Algeria at both the World Cup

and the Africa Cup of Nations, and he is on the verge of signing a new contractrepresentative of his importance to Spurs now. Villa have got many exciting young prospects, none more so than Jack Grealish, who hopefully (especially from a Villa point of view) will thrive under the guidance of Sherwood.

I think the Aston Villa and Tim Sherwood link will be perfect for both sides, and I for one certainly hope that he can return Villa to the levels they experienced under Martin O’Neill. I think that currently is an unrealistic aspiration for Villa with the current owner, but that is a conversation for another point.

Sherwood is inheriting a squad that has a core of International players- Guzan, Vlaar, Okore, Delph, Cleverley, Benteke, Weimann- and should be above where they currently find themselves. I think from Sherwood’s point of view, this is a fantastic opportunity and I believe he will be able to thrive in this role and start Villa’s rise back up the table. Best of luck to you Tim!

SPORT : 31

ISSUE 16/ 23rd FEBRUARY 2015 WWW.MANCUNION.COM

Flares, fights and football: AFCON 2015 Daniel Jenkins suggests Africa’s premier football competition is in dire need of reform Ivory Coast have been crowned the Afcon winners for only the second time in their un-illustrious past, winning it 11-10 against Ghana after a bore draw in allotted time. However the tournament wasn’t all majesty cup glory and penalty drama. Easily summed up as a highly turbulent belligerent contest witnessing a last ditch host change due to Ebola, ‘War Zone’ violence, contentious ref decisions, unspectacular games, and outdated ridiculous qualification rules.

All in all it nearly had everything you didn’t want in a tournament.

With the golden generation of Ivorian players coming to an end, it seemed a fitting tribute to powerhouse midfielder; Yaya Toure and the host of other talented Ivorian players to take the victory, which had neglected them for so long, losing in the 2006 and 2012 finals. The final was taken to a nail biting penalty shootout after producing a boring spectacle, which saw Ivorian goalkeeper Boubacar Barr score the winner, which uncannily was almost a complete repeat of the 1992 final, where Ivory Coast triumphed over Ghana, on penalties with the winner coming from the unlikely source of Ivory Coast’s goalkeeper Alain Gouamene.

However not everyone will feel the same way about seeing Toure lift the Afcon, especially within Manchester.

With Manchester City only recording one measly victory in the absent of their vice-captain, subsequently losing ground on title rivals; Chelsea, who now seem to have a firm grip on the Premier league. Also with Toure’s national counterpart and new club team mate Wilfred Bony, not yet featuring for the Blue side of Manchester, City were forced to adapt the already versatile James Milner into a striker; undoubtedly

not able to compete with Chelsea’s Diego Costa. However national success should be regarded as explicably more important than being involved with your club. A view which Yaya Toure deeply expressed after his Afcon success stating that, “when you win with your club, it’s quite amazing. With your country, it’s unbelievable.”

Previous to Ivory Coast’s success, the semi-final between Ghana and Host nation Equatorial Guinea was heavily stained with severe crowd trouble, described slightly over-elaborately by Ghana’s FA as a ‘War Zone’. However Police resorted to an unconventional and quite frankly bizarre tactic, using a helicopter to hover above the crowds of people, in an attempt to intimate the crowds, coincided with police officers using tear gas and batons, however unsurprisingly this fail. BBC reporter, Piers Edwards retrieved glass, rocks and broken plates from the pitch after seeking cover from tear gas, demonstrating the true depth and severity of the violence.

The game was finally able to resume, finishing the final three minutes. Ghana 2 – 1 Guinea.

Guinea’s passage into the semi-finals was anything but an easy ride, but with a contentious 90th minute penalty decision awarded and converted, forced added time, where Balboa’s exceptional 25 year free kick sent Guinea through. Ref Rajindraparsad Seechurn was pursued down the tunnel by five Tunisia’s players at the final whistle, with the game ending in disgrace rather than jubilation as the hosts who were ranked 96 places lower than Tunisia won. With player clashes, laser pens and pitch invasions leaving a sour taste. Subsequently Ref

Rajindraparsad Seechurn has been banned for six months after his shocking performances in the tournament, only really highlighting the tournaments lack of quality through-out.

Host nation; Equatorial Guinea received further favourably luck when the least sporting and unfair method of qualification possibly known; drawing of lots, resulted in the advance of Guinea to the quarter-finals while Mali were eliminated. With both teams locked after the three group games, impossible to separate the two, who scored, conceded, and fairly earned the same points were forced to await their fate, through the drawing of lots by two representatives of their respecting nations, to decide their fates. Former Tottenham and West Ham, and Mali international Frederic Kanoute, uttered his distaste at the process tweeting “This is no longer sport”. A view I assume most football fans have.

The tournament has unquestionably been tarnished by violence, dismal decisions by numerous parties involved and relatively unspectacular football; however the tournament has demonstrated extreme resilient. Shone through in particular by the surprised host nation; Equatorial Guinea. Ranked 118th in the world, who only qualified for the tournament when they replaced planned hosts Morocco, only hired their coach Esteban Becker 11 days before the tournament and gave five debuts in a pre-tournament friendly. Guinea showed great determination and luck to battle against all the odds, providing the much needed silver lining in this unforgettable tournament for all the wrong reasons.

Yaya Toure lifting the Ivory Coast’s first Cup of Nations in over two decades Photo: Wikimedia Commons

Alternative XI #3: Musicians In light of the Grammys, Mancunion Sport selects a musical XI. Goalkeeper: Julio Iglesias. A bit of a niche reference, but I was struggling for a goalkeeper. He was goalkeeper for Real Madrid in the 1960s but was involved in a serious car accident which ended his playing career. Luckily for him, his nurse gave him a guitar as part of his rehabilitation and he never looked back.

Now 71, the Spaniard has sold more than 300 million albums worldwide.

Left Back: Rod Stewart. No idea where he actually played, but you always see him on those celebrity charity matches. The Scottish superstar was on the books with Brentford before joining the Faces.

Defensive partnership: Spandau Ballet’s Steve Kemp and Steve Norman signed for Melchester Rovers in 1985.

Martin scored on his first team debut, making them the most legitimate musical footballers in this list.

Right Back: Nolberto Solano.

I realize Nobby was more of a winger, but we’re doing a Van Gaal and playing people out of position for the sake of it. The Peruvian is renowned for his trumpet skills and playing in

moves.

Forward: Wayne Rooney. The United captain gets a lot of stick for pretty much everything he does, but he is a trier, and a decent musician. He sang ‘Valerie’ by the Zutons with a full band at Manchester United’s Christmas party, and is personal friends with Ed Sheeran. There is a lovely video of the two sharing a duet.

Forward: Finally, on backing vocals, the entire of the Ghana squad. Everyone should watch the video of Ghana’s team singing before the World Cup quarter finals. Ex-Mancunion Sport Editor Tom Dowler said it summed up the World Cup perfectly, and showed a squad of players proud to represent their nation.

Have we missed anyone out? Tweet us @Mancunion_Sport

Latin American bands. You can only hope that the rumours of him taking his trumpet to away matches whilst playing at Newcastle are true.

Midfield diamond: Kevin Noble, Cheikhou Kouyate, Kevin Nolan, Stuart Downing and Alex Song. I’m sure you’ve heard that these four formed a reggae

band in support of NSPCC & the National Autistic society, and as expected it left a lot to be desired.

If you haven’t seen it check it out on YouTube, Stuart Downing is

on the drum, big Kev on piano, Kouyate on guitar and Song on lead vocals and bass. Expect a poor start to the song but a big finish, and chicken related dance

SPORT MANCHESTER’S STUDENT NEWSPAPER

TV Troubles

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Chelsea race row

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Fans from all over Europe visit the Football Museum to celebrate Manchester’s first Football v. Homophobia conference

Over 100 fans descended on the National Football Museum on Valentine’s day to attend the first Football v Homophobia conference.

Influential guests included Thomas Hitzlsperger, the former West Ham, Aston Villa and Everton player came out as gay following his retirement.

Hitzleperger took part in a Q & A session and emphasized the importance of sportsman, regardless if they’re still playing or retired saying, ‘[speaking about LGBT athletes] is so important; when professional football players come out they are making a statement, they are changing society, in a small but important way.

For a player the more signs they get that the environment is accepting gay players the more likely it is that someone will come out one day.’

As well as Hitzleperger, current Bolton Wanderers manager Neil Lennon was in the crowd.

Workshops also took place throughout the day, discussing issues

such as transphobia and discrimination, an important issue considering the recent problems in Paris.

Director of Football v Homophobia Lou Englefield, who last week was at the Armitage Centre launching the University Equality and Diversity Charter said that, ‘the feedback from the event has been overwhelmingly positive.

Thomas Hitzlsperger’s attendance attendance really set the tone for a great day of discussion amongst football fans and campaigners.’

One of the most moving accounts of the day came from a Swedish LGBT fan , Showan Shattak, who was the target of a homophobic attack in March 2014.

Talking about the event Shattak said, ‘It is good to meet others in the movement, especially because all of us are facing problems. I am inspired to continue fighting and make football more open to everyone.’

Although a firm stance against homophobia and discrimination has been adopted by the University of Manchester, it is questionable to

: @Mancunion_Sport : /TheMancunion

WWW.MANCUNION.COM

AFCON Review

“Fighting to make football more open to everyone.”

Andrew Georgeson Sport Editor

23rd FEBRUARY 2015/ ISSUE 16 FREE

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Around the grounds Men’s Volleyball (Cup) Northumbria 2nd 3-0 Manchester 1st

Men’s Football (Cup) Durham 2nd 1-2 Manchester 2nd

Men’s Water Polo (Cup) Manchester 2nd w/o Chester 1st

Men’s Lacrosse (Cup) Manchester 1st 11-2 Cardiff 1st

Women’s Netball (Cup) Manchester 3rd w/o Cumbria 1st

Women’s Netball (Cup) MMU 7th 42-32 Manchester 5th

Women’s Waterpolo (Cup) Manchester 1st 10-1 York 1st The FC United of Manchester badge that will appear on the programme on tuesday.

Photo: @FCUnitedMCR

what extent the current policies implemented by professional football clubs have affected the problem.

To show their solidarity with the movement Manchester City recently wore Football v Homophobia shirts during their warm up, and this Tuesday FC United are changing the background of their crest from white to a rainbow pattern.

FC United fan Ross Phillips said over Twitter that he thought the idea was ‘brilliant’ and ‘love it I’m a Bi FC United CoOwner. Very proud of my club for this. #FCUM [sic.]’

For those wanting to go to go to the FC United of Manchester match on Tuesday match day tickets are available for student from £5, and the stadium is close to Stalybridge train station. For more

information of the Football v. Homophobia campaign visit www. fo otb a l lvhomopho bi a . com.

A report of the event will be published next month that will inform campaigners how to work with fans in tackling LGBT discrimination.

Men’s Water Polo (Cup) Glasgow 1st 11-12 Manchester 1st

Women’s Hockey (Cup) Manchester 2nd 3-3 Leeds 2nd

Women’s Hockey (Cup) Bristol 1st 4-0 Manchester 1st

It’s not too late to join the Mancunion Sport team!

Tweet us @Mancunion_Sport for information on how to contribute to our final four issues—including our Rugby League Varsity special!