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RIDAL
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Thursday, January 23, 2014
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WeddedBliss
Bridal 2014
The Bulletin-Thursday, January 23, 2014
“She
completes me.”
“He
— Ryan Youngblood
’s everything I’m not.” — Corie Youngblood
B y V I N C E REMBUL AT
C
The Bu lletin
orie and Ryan Youngblood are a few weeks shy of their first wedding anniversary. They’re similar yet different. The Youngbloods, in many ways, are a case of opposites attract. Both have parents who are ministers – Corie’s father is Bishop Steve Perea of the Christian Worship Center in Manteca while Ryan’s father is Pastor Dean Youngblood of the Potter’s House Church in Kingsburg. Corie is outgoing, enjoys performing, and is quickly learning how to cook. She was amazed at how well her first attempt at making lentil tacos turned out on Monday. Ryan, on their first date, prepared a salmon dinner for Corie and her family equipped with decorative setting. “He grew up cooking, he’s really artistic and creative while I lack that,” said Corie, who also describes her husband as the reserved type not to mention that “cheesy lover guy.” Ryan grew up enjoying the great outdoors. He hunts and prefers roughing it out while camping. Born and raised in Manteca and home schooled via Connecting Waters Charter, Corie is OK with camping as long as bathrooms and showers are part of the accommodations. “I still don’t like that he hunts,” she said. Corie and Ryan met four years ago in Manteca at Revolution School of Ministry in which she was the co-director. Ryan a 2010 graduate of Sanger High in Sanger, came this way to take part in the full-time, nine-month program. The Revolution combines practical ministry training with class time and lectures from Christian Worship Center pastor and ministry leaders. “I didn’t like him at first,” Corie confessed. “I thought he talked too much.” By that, she’s referring to the preaching part of the Revolution program designed for the speaker to go two to three minutes. “He would go five to 10 minutes.” But it was during rehearsals of the annual “Puppet Master” – this is the production of the Revolution that draws thousands of area families – that they drew an attraction. Photo contributed “I had to catch her (in rehearsals) and each time we’d lock Corie and Ryan Youngblood during their wedding day, eyes,” Ryan said. Feb. 16, 2013. Added Corie, who is four years older: “I remember think-
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ing, ‘This kid likes me.’” They dated for about a year before Ryan popped the question. “He knew I didn’t want (to be proposed) at a restaurant,” she said. Ever creative, Ryan pulled the element of surprise in June 2012. At Knights Ferry, he staged a fake photo-shoot event with flyers et al. Ryan was aware that Corie, who is fan of fairies and enchanted forests, would like the wooded area of the park. They had a friend photograph what turned out to be a “capturing the moment” session. Ryan is shown dropping to one knee to ask Corie’s hand in marriage. Not realizing the moment initially, she had the deer-in-the-headlights look (this entire sequence was captured in a series of black and white photographs that adorns the hallway of their Manteca home) before emotions of happiness finally poured out. They got married on Feb. 16, 2013 at the Christian Worship Center in front of 500 people, consisting of family members, friends and churchgoers. Included was a dessert reception served up with tea or coffee and plenty of glitter to mark the Enchanted Forest theme. “I’ve always dreamed of getting married,” Corie said. “(Marriage) has exceeded my expectations.” For the Youngbloods, the transition of living together has involved some compromises, in particular, the little things. “I might forget to do the dishes,” she said. For the past two years, Ryan has worked in construction, where his job will send him to places throughout the area including Sonora and Angels Camp. Corie, for the past eight years, continues to works as the receptionist / media contact for the Christian Worship Center. They enjoy going out for tea – she prefers the fruity varieties while he’s just fine with green tea – along with dining out and perusing museums. During a recent trip to Los Angeles, they visited the Holocaust Museum. Corie’s a big fan of Cheesecake Factory. Ryan likes include SEE YOUNDBLOOD, PAGE 3
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Bridal 2014
3
The Bulletin-Thursday, January 23, 2014
Modern weddings building new traditions October is the new June. More and more, weddings are taking place in the height of fall foliage, heart of winter and prime holiday season, including the ever-popular New Year’s Eve ceremony to ring in the new year. But it’s not just the wedding season that has drastically evolved over the past decade, it’s everything from roles and responsibilities to gift-giving. As you gear up to celebrate the union of your beloved family or friends – or even your own - know what to expect from the changing tides of weddings. Lizzie Post, co-author of “Emily Post’s Etiquette, 18th edition” and great-great-granddaughter of Emily Post, helps couples navigate the new traditions of weddings. The Post name has been synonymous with proper etiquette and manners for the past 80 years. As decades pass, so will traditions, but proper etiquette is timeless. Be prepared for the next wedding you attend and know what to expect from changes in the wedding landscape with these important pieces of advice: Pay it forward Finding the right gift for the newlyweds can be difficult. While registries help to point guests in the right direction, many couples are getting married later in life and already have all the household items that are common wedding gifts. To provide the couple with a small nest egg to use however they wish, a check is always a great and safe gift idea. Several financial institutions, like Bank of America, offer mobile check deposit through their banking app, allowing
Photo contributed
New times, new traditions: Modern wedding trends from stock-the-bar parties to social networking sites to wearing tennis shoes on the big day.
the couple the flexibility to deposit checks on-the-go to help cover outstanding vendor payments or use on their honeymoon. Another new-age trend is contributing to a couple’s honeymoon fund. Temper tech use Even weddings are going hi-tech. There are numerous websites available that can help the couple to organize the process, communicate with
guests and share photos after the ceremony. But a few things – like a handwritten “thank you” note – should steer clear of the hi-tech lure. In a gadget-driven society, everyone is carrying a smartphone. Couples can post a tasteful notice at the entrance of the ceremony location or in the program to remind guests to turn off their cell phone ringers and refrain from use during the ceremony. Some couples
may actually encourage guests to take photos and share images via social media, but guests should respect their wishes and use phones only as a camera and upload images after the ceremony. Respect personalization Couples want their special day to reflect who they are and what is important to them. While previous generations traditionally wed in places
of worship, many modern couples choose to tie the knot at a sentimental location, like where they had their first date. The decor, music and even the food and drink served at a wedding may have a personal story behind it. No matter how nontraditional the element may be, guests should eagerly partake in the festivities, acknowledging and respecting the couple’s individualization. Be all-inclusive In the past, bridal showers were strictly for the bride and bachelor parties were a men-only affair. Nowadays, these festivities are no longer gender-specific. Showers can be thrown for the couple in unison and include creative themes like “stock the bar” or “time of day.” Bachelor and bachelorette parties can also be conjoined to involve the entire bridal party in a destination event. And while these events are a celebration of joy, expenses can add up quickly. If you use a rewards card, like the BankAmericard Travel Rewards credit card, you can earn points on purchases to pay for all or part of your trip. This is great for both the bride and groom and guests traveling to the wedding. As trends and expectations shift, so will the way major life milestones are celebrated. It is important to celebrate these moments in life with grace and support for the happy couple – after all, it’s their day – and it should be as unique as they are. For further etiquette advice on navigating 21st century weddings, visit www.emilypost.com.
How to approach music on your wedding day
Choosing wedding reception favors Planning a perfect wedding is no small undertaking. From scheduling venues and hiring vendors to tasting menus, lots of decisions must be made when planning a wedding. But when the pieces fall into place, the entire day can be magical. One of the final components of weddings are the favors guests will take home with them as mementos of the festivities. Though favors don’t require immediate attention, that does not mean couples should wait until the last minute to made decisions regarding their wedding favors. Brides- and grooms-tobe should not underestimate the importance of handing out wedding favors, a tradition with a rich history. A wedding favor is considered a symbol of good will to guests, and there are many different wedding favors on the market. Finding the right one can take a little work. It is usually a good idea to find something that suits the theme of the wedding and is both long-lasting and practical. Try to avoid anything that is too kitschy. A couple’s budget should
be considered when choosing wedding favors. A couple may want to give their guests lavish gifts but should only do so if their budget allows. It may be challenging for couples to find favors that fit the theme of their wedding, as well as their own personalities and budgets. But it can be done. The following are some favorfinding guidelines. Be creative Wedding favors can be just about anything, so there’s no need to stick to Jordan almonds or wine bottle stoppers. The more creative couples are, the more receptive their guests will likely be. For example, for an autumn-theme wedding, fill mason jars with the ingredients for a spiced cake and give the recipe directions on a tag. For a summer wedding, gift guests with a sun and surf survival bag, full of sunblock, a beach towel and sunglasses. Complete the theme Some weddings follow a particular theme from start to finish, and wedding favors should stick with that theme. Couples who will showcase their love of travel on their wedding days may want to give
YOUNGBLOOD FROM PAGE 2
the HillBilly BBQ in Manteca. Likes and differences aside, they were meant for each other. The two are best friends who can have conversations during long drives as if they’ve met for the first time. “She completes me,” Ryan said. Corie agreed. “He’s everything I’m not,” she said. Marriage has been an exciting adventure for the Youngbloods, who are planning to mark
guests keychains or purse holders that feature popular landmarks around the world. Those who are admitted beach bums may want to present a small fishbowl with sand and a goldfish inside, reminiscent of days at the seashore. Go traditional Couples who opt for universally appealing favors can lean toward some popular options, such as silver cake servers, candlestick holders, decorative photo frames, or engraved keepsake boxes. Aim for favors that have utility. Otherwise, favors may end up collecting dust on someone’s shelf. Food and beverage gifts are fun Food favors mean guests can enjoy their gifts and not have to worry about finding space inside their homes to display trinkets. Food favors can be lavishly decorated cookies, fine chocolates, petit fours, small bottles of champagne or cupcakes decorated like the wedding cake. Favors are often integral to wedding celebrations. Selecting a favor that will be appreciated and fit with the wedding is often a fun and stress-free part of planning a wedding.
their first-year anniversary by booking a trip to Seattle. “One of our goals is to visit a different state every year,” Corie said. As for family, they both want children. Right now, they can’t agree on a number. “I’m an only child so I want a family of five (children),” said Corie. Ryan, who grew up with siblings, would prefer having two or maybe even three children. When that moment finally comes, chances are the Youngbloods will likely come to some sort of compromise.
Our
Photo contributed
The right music sets the stage for your wedding and reception.
to give couples more leeway. But in general couples don’t want to choose any music that’s too loud or over-the-top for their ceremonies. Keep in mind that while the music played during the ceremony can set the tone for the day, this music can vary significantly from the music played during the reception. A favorite performer may not be appropriate during the ceremony, but that doesn’t mean the couple can’t dance to that artist’s music during the reception. Live musicians can add a more elegant feel to the ceremony, but such performers also can be costly. Playing prerecorded music may not be as elegant as having a live
performer, but it can cost a lot less and still make for an enjoyable day and evening. Reception Many couples ‑Since 1936 prefer deejays to live bands for their wedding receptions. Deejays can play favorite songs as couples and their guests know them, while bands can only play their own renditions 5 0 8 ofE . those Yo s songs. Another thing to con823-451 sider when choosing between “A Bridal a deejay or live band forTrad the reception is the venue itself. Call fo Some venues are smaller and unable toFor accommodate a full your Hairstyle, band, while others may our Large Staffnotcan have ideal acoustics, making Entire Par it difficult for a Wedding live band to sound as goodGrooms as they might Too! in a more music-friendly environment.
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Favors are often integral to wedding celebrations. Selecting a favor that will be appreciated and fit with the wedding is often a fun and stress-free part of planning a wedding.
Mante c
Photo contributed
Music often plays an important role on festive occasions, and wedding days are no exception. The right music can make a wedding day that much more meaningful, while the wrong music can make a couple’s big event memorable for all the wrong reasons. Though music selection might seem like one of the easier decisions couples must make, those about to tie the knot typically must make a host of music-related decisions regarding their wedding day, including whether to choose a live band or a deejay to perform at their wedding receptions. While the reception is when music might be most on display, couples planning their weddings must think beyond the reception when setting the musical tones for their weddings. Ceremony The ceremony itself often sets the tone for a couple’s wedding day. A beach wedding, for example, often creates a laid back atmosphere, while a ceremony held in a large church or temple often sets a more formal tone. Music played during the ceremony also goes a long way toward setting the tone couples hope to establish. When choosing music for the ceremony, couples should first consider the venue where they are tying the knot. Some, such as houses of worship, may have rules pertaining to what can and cannot be played inside the venue. Classical, hymnal or processional music often makes the best fit when weddings are taking place in more formal venues. Outdoor weddings tend
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Bridal 2014
The Bulletin-Thursday, January 23, 2014
Memorable destination wedding tips
Photo contributed
Your wedding invitational gives guests a glimpse of the style you are using for your big day.
Tips for your wedding invitations Wedding invitations often provide guests with a first glimpse of a wedding’s style. Invitations also may serve as the means by which distant friends and relatives find out about a couple’s pending nuptials if a formal announcement was not made. Amid the flourishes of calligraphy and impressive paper stock is information that speaks to the importance of the day when two people will be joining their lives together. Guests will learn not only the time and the place of the wedding from the invitation, but also the formality of the event and the scope of the party that will follow. Couples should keep certain things in mind as they begin to design their wedding invitations. • Have a good idea of your potential guest list. Before shopping for wedding invitations, it is key to have a strong idea of just how big the wedding will be and how many guests will be invited. This way you will know how many invitations you will need. Invitations vary in price, so cost may be a consideration if your guest list is extensive. • Decide on the formality of the wedding. Will you be hosting a black tie affair, or will it be a casual gathering at the shore? Guests infer many things about the wedding from the invitations, which should match the formality of the event in style and the sentiments expressed. An ornate invitation written with classic wording suggests a more formal affair, while a whimsical invitation with less formal wording could indicate a more laid-back event. • Dare to be different by playing with invitation sizes and shapes. Rectangular cards are standard for wedding invitations, but you can explore your creativity by choosing more modern, artsy invitations. Circular invites or scalloped edges can add some whimsy to the wedding mood. Invitations that fold out or are embellished with ribbon or other decorations can be appealing. Just keep in mind that cards that are not the standard shape and size could be more costly to send. Always have the entire wedding invitation weighed and priced at the post office so you will know what the postage will cost. • Choose a legible font
and text color. Your invitation may look beautiful, but it may prove ineffective if it is difficult to read. Do not risk guests misinterpreting the date or the location because they cannot read the writing on the invitation. Steer clear of pastel or yellow text colors, and remember to have a high contrast between the color of the invitation and the text you are using for easy reading. • Keep the invitation simple. It may be tempting to load the invitation with lots of information, but all you really need are the key pieces of information, such as the “who,” “what,” “where,” and “when.” Crowding the card will take away from its aesthetic appeal. Most stationers will suggest a separate, smaller insert in the wedding invitation for the reception information and response card. Never put information such as where you are registered or “no kids allowed.” This is material better reserved for word of mouth or on a wedding Web site. • Do some math. It is important to know your dates so you can receive the invitations on time, mail them out, and give guests enough time to respond. A good rule of thumb is to mail out the invitations at least two months before the wedding. Have an RSVP date of no more than three to four weeks before the wedding, giving ample time to the caterers and accommodating anyone who procrastinates in sending in a response. You will need the final headcount in order to confirm seating arrangements and plan for centerpieces and favors. • Handwrite the envelopes. Your invitation will look more impressive if you address them by hand, rather than printing them off of a computer. If your handwriting is not very neat, consider hiring a professional calligrapher to write out your envelopes. • Make it easy for guests to respond. Be sure to place a stamp on the response card envelope and have that envelope already addressed with your home address so that guests will have no excuses not to mail a response back promptly. • Always order extra. Mistakes happen, and you may need to send out a few extra invitations that you hadn’t originally counted.
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A flurry of congratulatory phone calls, social media announcements and sparkling ring pictures all mean one thing: engagement season has arrived. With approximately 39 percent of marriage proposals taking place between Thanksgiving and Valentine’s Day, engaged couples are taking note of one of the fastest-growing nuptial trends - destination weddings. These days, one in four weddings is a destination wedding, giving couples – and their guests – a reason to blend the joy of a marriage celebration with a fun and memorable vacation. Planning a destination wedding suitable for all your attendees is easier than you think, thanks to some key insights from Myrtle Beach-based expert wedding planner, Cheryl Cox. 1. Plan ahead Cox says nine to 12 months is the optimum planning time, especially for a destination wedding. Many couples start planning a destination wedding as soon as they get engaged. While the summer months are typically most popular for couples, when choosing a date, Cox recommends considering a Friday or weekday wedding, or planning the big day during the less-crowded but still desirable shoulder seasons (spring and fall). 2. Select a destination that caters to all guests Consider a location with something for everyone. Myrtle Beach, S.C., is the perfect example. The destination offers pristine greens for golf enthusiasts, museums and historic plantations for cultural buffs, delicious Coastal Carolina cuisine for the foodies, fun in the sun with a day at the beach or one of the many water parks, and for brides looking for some quality time with the girls, numerous spas for a day of pampering. Plus, there are plenty of lodging options for your guests including oceanfront resorts, beach home rentals and quaint bed and breakfasts. 3. Research ceremony locations Beautiful and unique cer-
emony locations are one of the perks of having a destination wedding. “Research wedding venues, travel and accommodation options, and rates, then rank the venues you like best,” suggests Cox. As a Myrtle Beach wedding planner, she notes that the area’s 60 miles of stunning coastline make the perfect romantic backdrop. Whether you’re looking for a beachside wedding outside a charming beach home or at the Myrtle Beach State Park, or a historic location like Litchfield Plantation or Pine Lakes Country Club, there are countless ceremony locations to choose from. You can even tie the knot 200 feet above the ground on the Myrtle Beach Skywheel. Visit www.visitmyrtlebeach. com for more information. 5. Help guests plan activities Travel is the foundation for long-lasting memories. In fact, a recent Harris Interactive survey found 62 percent of adults said their earliest memories were of family vacations taken when they were between ages 5 and 10.
Help your guests – particularly families with young ones – get the most out of their trip by suggesting activities or even making reservations for dinners, tee times, theme parks, museums, etc., before arrival. 6. Hire a wedding planner Planning a destination wedding doesn’t need to be stressful — hire a wedding planner. “Wedding planners know the local wedding professionals and venues including the city regulations for beach weddings,” says Cox. The perfect beach wedding can be accomplished with the help of a wedding planner as they know the ins and outs of planning a beautiful beach wedding so couples and their guests can enjoy the true beauty of a beachside wedding. 7. Consider a pre-wedding visit “If possible, attend a local wedding show to meet wedding professionals one-onone or plan a ‘wedding planning trip’ to visit venues and meet with wedding vendors,” Cox suggests. “Remember to take notes so you can recall
all the details when you’re back home.” 8. Get wedding insurance Give yourself peace of mind by purchasing the appropriate wedding insurance. And, Cox notes, “Research to find the best coverage for your wedding - I highly recommend it.” 9. Be mindful of budget Start your marriage off on the right financial foot by keeping your wedding onbudget. Many couples planning destination weddings find them to be similar or even more affordable than traditional weddings back home. Myrtle Beach offers a variety of wedding venue options at various price points, so you can have your dream beach wedding and still stay on a budget. 10. Enjoy! This is perhaps the most important step of all. Don’t forget to enjoy the experience of planning this memorable day and enjoying the company of your guests. Take pictures, sample cakes, pick out flowers and remember these moments and the beautiful destination you selected.
Tips for newlyweds on handling thorny money issues Newlyweds often have a lot on their plates upon returning from their honeymoons. One of the more critical issues newly married couples must address is their finances and how those finances will be combined going forward. Combining finances can be a touchy subject for many couples, especially those who had not given much thought to their finances prior to tying the knot. But there are steps couples can take to make the process of merging finances go more smoothly. • Discuss finances early and often. Allowing finances to be the elephant in the room is a mistake, as couples do not want to begin their lives together treading lightly around an issue as significant as finances. Couples should discuss their expenditures and spending habits as early as possible, as one of the biggest hurdles newly married
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couples must clear is coming to grips with one another’s financial habits. If such habits have already been discussed, then developing a financial plan will be much easier once that time comes. When discussing finances, define both short-term and long-term goals and how each of you can adjust your spending habits to make those goals come true. • Pay off any debts. The cost of weddings has skyrocketed over the last several decades, and many newlyweds find themselves in a considerable amount of debt upon returning from their honeymoons. When merging finances, couples should prioritize paying down such debt, as debt is a significant source of stress for newlyweds and long-married couples alike. Newly married couples with little or no debt should avoid spending above their means in the months after they get married. Such spending is commonplace, as newly married couples often want to fully furnish their new homes or reward themselves for pulling off their weddings. But new debt can be just as stressful on a marriage as debt from the wedding, so avoid this potentially problematic pitfall by paying down existing debts with your newly merged finances. • Make note of mutual expenses and open a joint account to pay for those expenses. Mutual expenses like mortgage payments, food and utilities should be the responsibility of each partner, and a joint account should be established to handle such expenses. When opening a joint account, discuss how much and how often
Photo contributed
Merging finances is an issue many newly married couples face upon returning from their honeymoons.
each partner will contribute money. One partner might earn considerably more money than another, so work out a reasonable agreement that details how much each partner will contribute each month, and whether such contributions will be made on a weekly, bi-weekly or monthly basis. • Make concessions for one another. When merging finances, couples often discover that they don’t see eye-to-eye on how each person spends money. Couples who successfully merge their finances often note the impor-
tance of making concessions with regard to their partners’ spending on certain hobbies or luxuries. As long as those hobbies are not putting couples in debt or jeopardizing their financial goals, couples can make concessions so their partners continue to be happy and enjoy their favorite activities. Merging finances is an issue that looms for many newlyweds or couples about to tie the knot. Though it’s not always easy, merging finances early and discussing goals can ensure newlyweds get off on the right financial foot.
Bridal 2014
The Bulletin-Thursday, January 23, 2014
5
Tom and Dorothy Olson walk down the aisle of the Congregational Church in Hayward where they exchanged vows 65 years ago on Nov. 26. Photo contributed
ROSE ALBANO RISSO/The Bulletin
Tom and Dorothy Olson in the living room of their Manteca home where they lived since the 1960s.
Tom & Dorothy Olson
Sharing the joy of 65 years of marriage By R OSE A L BAN O RI SSO The Bu lletin
S
he was the pretty girl next door. He was the handsome quiet boy in school. They both lived in the same neighborhood in the city of Castro Valley “when it was country in the outskirts of Oakland.” They took the same school bus to Hayward High. That’s where they first met. They attended the same classes. She was just 14 years old, a freshman. “We weren’t boyfriend, girlfriend,” beamed the former Dorothy Smith as she flashed a loving, blinding smile at the tall man with an amiable face sitting next to her on the comfortable couch in their living room. But they were good friends, Dorothy said of her husband, Tom Olson. Little did she know then, though, that he already had a crush on her. After graduating from high school, they went their separate ways. She went to have her nurse’s training at Santa Clara County Hospital, and took nursing classes at California State University in San Jose. Tom went to Cal Poly – San Luis Obispo to continue his studies It was during those years that their romance truly blossomed. “He used to come and see me” in Santa Clara, Dorothy recalled, eyes twinkling as her husband’s right hand cupped her right shoulder with a squeeze in a mute message that only close couples could communicate. There were other boys at San Jose State, she said, but none that, in her mind, could compare with Tom. “He was always a nice boy. His mother always told him to treat women nice,” said Dorothy as their smiling daughter-in-law Marian, who was visiting with her husband Raymond from Ventura, listened in with undisguised pride. Seven years after Dorothy first set her eyes on her Romeo, they were married at the Congregational Church in Hayward. A black-and-white wedding photo shows the happy couple walking down the aisle after the exchange of
vows – Dorothy looking like Bette Davis next to a dashing Cary Grant look-alike. The celluloid stars were exactly the Hollywood personalities that family members and friends compared the Olsons to, with Marian confirming their perceived resemblance. “We had a pretty good-sized wedding,” Dorothy happily recalled the Nov. 26 red-letter day in their life. That was 65 years and two months ago. “It’s a long time,” commented Dorothy with a small laugh. “We’ve had a good marriage; we feel very blessed.” Their marital union produced five children – two sons and three daughters. Oldest Glenda Burns is a retired school teacher who is continuing her art pursuits. A prolific artist, she does a lot of art shows with ceramics as one of her latest media. Second daughter Janet Wilde was the one sibling who followed in mother’s medical footsteps. A registered nurse, she lives with her family in Prescott, Ariz. Third daughter Doreen Heath is an accomplished and award-winning artist in her own right. Like her sister Glenda, Doreen’s artistic talent is quite boundless. She’s still very much involved in the art scene in Modesto where she and her husband live, and was just recently in a ukelele band, Dorothy said.
The Olsons’ two sons didn’t inherit their father’s artistic genes. Fourth child Raymond, who also attended Cal Poly, and wife Marian who is a teacher, live in Ventura. Youngest sibling Johnny and his family live in Crescent City. He is an evidence technician for the Humboldt County Sheriff’s Department. The biggest test to the Olsons’ marriage happened when Tom was in his 18th year of working for San Joaquin County as a sanitation inspector. That’s when he decided to resign from his job to fulfill a childhood dream – that of being an artist. The day he dropped the bombshell on an incredulous Dorothy, she was getting ready to fly to Liberia in Africa to spend a few weeks with her daughter Janet who was serving as a Peace Corps volunteer. She had been saving up for that trip, but when her husband surprised her with his shocking announcement with their family financial predicament utmost in her mind, she wondered if it was wise and fiscally prudent to go ahead with her planned trip. In the end, she did go ahead with her dream trip, thanks in part to the financial separation pay Tom received from his job. Dorothy’s worries and anxieties about her husband’s change of career literally in mid-life, and while their children were still in school,
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turned out to be a blessing not only for the Olson household but also for the art community at large. With his whimsical oil paintings of rustic countrysides and seascapes, Tom was soon reaping accolades. His romantic rustic paintings of old barns, farmhouses and scenic vistas soon became a must-have for art collectors. Among the many awards he received through the years came from the annual Lathrop Mayor’s Art Purchase Show and Sale. One of his paintings is now part of the city’s permanent collection and can be viewed in the Joyce Gallo Art Gallery at Lathrop City Hall during business hours. Tom, who was one of the founding members of the Manteca Artist Guild which he served as president more than once, literally put Manteca on the art map as his fame crossed state boundaries. Dorothy still vividly remembers the time they were at an outdoor event in San Francisco where they had an art booth. They attended dozens of these weekend events every year throughout California. While Dorothy, who became her husband’s business manager, handled the sale of his paintings, her husband would be painting on site. At this particular event in San Francisco’s downtown business district, a crowd several people deep surrounded Tom as he painted away oblivious
to the city folks who watched in fascination. That day, they sold all of Tom’s paintings. They could have sold more but they ran out of paintings to sell. Asked the standard question as to the secret to their long marriage, both Tom and Dorothy were literally at a loss for words as though the question never even occurred to them. “I don’t know; I just don’t know,” said a slightly surprised and laughing Dorothy. Her sentiments were echoed by her self-consciously smiling husband.
But after wracking her brain for a few moments, she eventually found some words to say. You have to be “good friends,” she said. “We have a lot respect for each other. And we always have been good friends,” Dorothy said as her husband close behind her nodded his confirmation. After 65 years of marital bliss, she said, “we appreciate each other more and more. As you get older, you get the same aches and pains, so you understand when your partner complains.”
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Bridal 2014
The Bulletin-Thursday, January 23, 2014
Renewing 25 years of love & laughter By GL ENN KAH L T h e B ul le t i n
I
t was a surprise renewal of their wedding vows for Dee Meadows and her Manteca mailman husband Ken at the Ripon Roadhouse restaurant after 25 years of marriage and four children. Dee had no idea what was in store for her when her husband took her out for dinner with four friends who just happened to include her maid of honor and their best man. They took their seats at a table in the dining room as Ken presented his wife with a bouquet of variegated roses and a medal that he placed around her neck on a lanyard. The inscription read, “Medal of long suffering, 9 December 1988 to 9 December 2013 – Sainthood Pending.” The Reverend Terry Saffold, a former Manteca postal employee, stood at the end of their table with other diners looking on as he led them in reciting their vows. It was 25 years to the day that the couple first recited those vows in their Manteca living room with some 35 guests on hand to witness their marriage on Ruffino Court. Meadows said he has faithfully remembered their anniversaries every year, adding that “this one topped the cake, didn’t it?” as he was being interviewed for the story while walking his route on Yosemite Avenue Friday afternoon. He said he has usually gotten her roses every year with her later replying, “He should do it more often. But every day, he is loving and caring,” she said. Being inter-
viewed in a hair salon in Manteca, she chuckled, remembering how she returned his constant teasing one night as they were getting ready for bed. She said she was first to use the bathroom where she found his tooth brush and put cake frosting on the bristles. Dee told Ken that she had mistakenly put tooth paste on her brush thinking it was hers, saying it was all ready for him. She said he went ahead and brushed his teeth, not realizing it was a little sweeter than normal. When he got into bed and got comfortable, dropping off to sleep she nudged him and said he had better brush his teeth again for what he had used was cake frosting, a message that caused uncontrollable laughter for them both. Ken says she is a natural in the kitchen with her sought after caramel pie and her “apple pie moonshine” that she says her husband has left for other members of the family and friends. He remembers well the homemade cookies she baked especially for him and put with his brown bag lunch to enjoy on his mail route. A problem surfaced w h e n Ken
GLENN KAHL/The Bulletin
Ken and Dee Meadows look at their anniversary cake after a planned surprise celebration dinner at the Ripon Roadhouse with their best man and maid of honor along with their spouses.
GLENN KAHL/The Bulletin
It was a magic moment for Dee Meadows when she realized roses were meant for her with a teary eyed kiss from her Manteca mailman husband Ken. The Reverend Terry Saffold applauds the surprise.
told his wife he wasn’t getting the cookies with his two sandwiches. They came to realize shortly that 3 ½-year-old son Kenny was getting up in the middle of the night and crawling up on the counter to get to those cookies. “He harassed me a lot about a raccoon in our garage,” she recalled. She had gone out into the garage one night after hearing a strange noise and found her cat backed away from her food. A raccoon was emptying the dish of cat food at her feet. “Ken wouldn’t bring me a beer while we were waiting for animal control to arrive,” she quipped. The couple spent many hours bowling together with Ken often reaching 200. He tells of wanting a new bowling ball for his birthday one year. A gift box came in the size of the ball which he said excited him when opening the present. But, his wife was pulling his chain again with a Raiders blanket she had created at home. She made sure the weight of the box was near that of a bowling ball. Meadows has worked at the Manteca Post Office since 1981 where he eventually met Dee was delivering mail for a private vendor. “He took care of a problem with a janitor,” she said. “The kids and I later went to his house and we never went home.” She said she was 23 years old then with Ken just four years her senior. He had already served a tour with the United States Air Force. Over the years they have vacationed in many different places from Hawaii to the Grand Canyon and Yosemite National Park. “She’d rather camp and I’d rather stay in a hotel,” he laughed. “I did that when I was younger – forget it.” Meadows said his wife has always been a stay-at-home mom and is pretty much a seamstress. “She makes blankets, makes the grandkids’ clothes along with some pretty intricate blankets,” he said. Dee also has an embroidering machine, he added. Probably the warmest of the memories she cherishes was that Ken adopted her two oldest sons after they were married.