THE FIGHT LGBT MAGAZINE OCT. 2011

ISSUE 009 OCTOBER 2011 THEFIGHTMAG.COM

MANNING UP

JEREMY MANNING’S ROAD TO RECOVERY

BULLIED TO DEATH CHRISTIAN COMMENTATOR BLAMES GAYS

UNFRIENDLY SKIES SOUTHWEST AIRLINES’ LESBIAN MISHAP

END GAME ZINNIA JONES RESPONDS TO PAT ROBERTSON

BUILDING LGBT FAMILIES: THE REPRODUCTIVE PROCESS

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FINAL FIGHT CONTENTS

THE

EDITOR BULLIED TO DEATH

STORIESTHE AND FEATURES THE COVERTHE THE

HEADLINES Another Gay Teen Takes Own Life

SIDING WITH HATE

UNFRIENDLY SKIES WE ARE FAMILY Surrogacy: What You Need To Know

MANNING UP

Jeremy Manning’s Road To Recovery

FREE AT LAST? Examining Religious Expression

CONTROVERSIAL APP AXED Gay Creator Says He’s Misunderstood

MANNING UP

JEREMY MANNING’S ROAD TO RECOVERY

BULLIED TO DEATH CHRISTIAN COMMENTATOR BLAMES GAYS

UNFRIENDLY SKIES SOUTHWEST AIRLINES’ LESBIAN MISHAP

END GAME ZINNIA JONES RESPONDS TO PAT ROBERTSON

BUILDING LGBT FAMILIES: THE REPRODUCTIVE PROCESS

82

GAY END TIMES

Zinnia Jones Responds to Pat Robertson

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IN EVERY ISSUE

Letter From The Editor The Headlines Hollywood Chick-Fil-A Protest The Epidemic Altered HIV Possible Breakthrough Rostow Report Iowa Marriage In Jeopardy The Body Prostate Cancer Prevention Tips The Money Get It In Writing The Pets Pet Owners Less Stressed Dining Recommended Restaurant Options The Calendar Events, Groups, Resources

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ISSUE 009 OCTOBER 2011 THEFIGHTMAG.COM

Southwest’s Lesbian Mishap

EPIDEMIC

THEFIGHT

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Christian Commentator Blames Gays

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LETTER FROM THE EDITOR

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their agencies assume

Reading this month’s interview with acupuncturist John Convey The road to success is rarely a straight Manning’s life (“Conveying Wellness,” pages 20-21), Iline. wasJeremy struck by the fact that story in this issue (“Manning certainly illustrates that Convey, at the young age ofUp,” six page years22) old, had already realized point.his “homosexuality was as genetically based as were the that color of my eyes.”

Overcoming drug addiction, domestic abuse and many moments

Reading this month’s interview with acupunct of isolation and despair, Manning’s recovery is remarkable. After (“Conveying Wellness,” 20-21), This realization, it seems, assisted Conveypages in coming to terms withI was str realizing physical fitness is key to achieving strength of spirit, Manhis homosexuality much quicker than many LGBT folks I have met ning eventually turned his life around. age of six years old, ha Convey, the young throughout theat years.

Currently, as director of West Hollywood’s “Elevation Fitness,” that hiscontinue “homosexuality was asnon-profit genetically b Manning back to to deal the community by way of histhroughout Many of usgives with, in varying degrees, foundation Uplift Project.” “Because fitnessaimed has always been our lives, internalized homophobia - self-hatred at ourselves color of“The my eyes.” for being gay/bi/trans a powerful force in mymen life and women. in my recovery, I’ve developed a

program to offer affordable services to survivors of abuse, addic-

This realization, it seems, assisted Convey in co his homosexuality much quicker than many LG throughout the years.

Most of us have experienced andout absorbed negative and tion and serious illness, reaching to anyone fightinglabels for their ideas about homosexuality for years.

Even if you came from a life,” says Manning.

To learn more visit www.upliftprojectla.com. family that did not speak negatively about homosexuality or Additionally, in this issue, California Fertility Partners’ Dr. Guy even actively supported it, you still heard and absorbed a lot of Ringler talks about the advancements in reproductive medicine enmessages from the culture as a whole. abling gay men and women to have children and build families of

their single own (“We Are Family,” page 18). in liberating oneself from The most important step internalized homophobia is recognizing that the sourceasisaexternal “As a gay man who struggled with my own acceptance young -man, “programming” written a society which, general, is still I feel passionate aboutby educating young gayinmen and women negatively disposed towards about the options available forhomosexuality family building,” says Dr. Ringler.

Many of us continue to deal with, in varying de our lives, internalized homophobia - self-hatred Creating LGBT families is definitely a factor in creating social and for being gay/bi/trans men and Realizing the source of this homophobia is the first stepwomen. to dealing political change, says Dr. Ringler. “Each proud parent and child bewith it. come ambassadors for gay families everywhere, changing the attitudes and perceptions of people wherever they go.”

Most of us have experienced and absorbed n Enjoy the issue! ideas about homosexuality for years. Even if family that did not speak negatively about even actively supported it, you still heard and messages from the culture as a whole.

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THE

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EPIDEMIC OBAMA CELEBRATES WITH

From left to right: President Obama, Herman Cain, Ryan Idol

HRC

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President Obama attended the Human Rights Campaign’s annual gala this month, celebrating the new ability of gays and lesbians to serve openly in the U.S. military, saying that “we believe in an equal America that values the service of every patriot.”

Obama’s remarks referred to the demise of the military’s “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. That policy was repealed by Congress last December and came to an official end Sept. 20.

Saying that some people might want to overturn such strides for equality, Obama declared: “We believe in a big America.

A tolerant America. An equal America that values the service of every patriot. E pluribus unum - out of many, one. And that includes everybody.”

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CAIN RESPONDS TO GAY SOLDIER FIASCO Republican presidential candidate Herman Cain, appearing on ABC’s “This Week with Christiane Amanpour,” was asked about the criticism leveled by President Obama against GOP presidential candidates who stood silent at a debate last month when a gay soldier, stationed in Iraq, was booed by the audience after asking about the repeal of “don’t ask, don’t tell.”

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Cain said during the heat of the debate, he thought the audience was booing repeal of the ban on gays and lesbians serving openly in the military. He said in retrospect he “probably” would have done something because of the “different interpretations” the audience disapproval could have had.

HOLLYWOOD CHICK-FIL-A PROTEST Tens of people gathered last month at the new Chick-fil-A restaurant, located on 6750 W Sunset Blvd, in Hollywood to protest the fast food The THEFIGHT

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Georgia-based chain provided, free of charge, some of its famous chicken sandwiches a few months ago for a marriage seminar run by one of the nation’s leading anti-gay organizations.

Chick-fil-A has long-been transparent about its so-called Christian values. They close their stores on Sundays, a practice that has helped the chain garner the nickname “Jesus Chicken,” and have even gone so far as to consider a potential employee’s marital status and civic and church involvement in their hiring process.

At the protest, people held up placards and brochures that read, “Say No to Homophobia.”

FEWER GAY TV CHARACTERS The number of gay and bisexual characters on scripted broadcast network TV has dipped slightly this season to 19 out of nearly 650 roles, according to the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation.

The 16th annual “Where We Are on TV” report released last month

by GLAAD found that 2.9% of actors appearing regularly on primetime network drama and comedy series in the 2011-12 season will portray gay, lesbian or bisexual characters.

That’s down from 3% in the 2009-10 season and 3.9% last season, when there were 23 out of a total of nearly 600 roles.

The number of gay and bisexual characters on cable networks has also fallen slightly, from 35 last season to 29 this season.

RYAN IDOL CONVICTED OF ATTEMPTED MURDER A jury in Sacramento found former gay-porn star Ryan Idol (a.k.a.

Marc Anthony Donais) guilty of attempted murder last month.

Donais, 45, who was a Playgirl centerfold and the star of such 1990s porn films as Idol Worship, Idol Thoughts, and Idol in the Sky, was convicted of attempted murder for beating a former girlfriend over the head with a porcelain toilet tank lid in 2009.

According to The Sacramento Bee, the victim testified that she ended her relationship with Donais after catching him having sex with another man.

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LIFE LAST MONTH. As his body tries to rid itself of these substances, a variety

Police have opened in thetheir suicide death last This month UpLifta criminal Project investigation will be hosting 2nd fundraiser of skin, digestive and respiratory symptoms may appear. month of Buffalo, N.Y., 14-year-old Jamey Rodemeyer, who was in association with Elevation Fitness, Liddy Health Works, bullied online withand gayBody360 slurs for more than a year.

Team2EndAIDS Nutritionals.

Any dog can develop allergies at any time during his life,

The teen’s parents, friends and even Lady Gaga, who was his idol, but allergic reactionsis seem to be especially common in terUpLiftexpressed Project’s mission to provide fitness to survivors have outrage about what affordable they say was relentless tor- of riers, setters, retrievers, and flat-faced breeds such as pugs, ment onserious social networking abuse, illness andwebsites. addiction. Their headquarters, Elevation

bulldogs and Boston terriers.

Fitness andhad Liddy Healthhis Works combine make the North first ever Rodemeyer just started freshman year atto Williamsville “Organic Wellness Center” with services such as massage, pilates High School. But the bullying had begun during middle school, acA few common allergens include: tree, grass and weed polcording to his performance parents. He had told family and that hecare had are certification, enhancement andfriends chiropractic lens, mold spores, dust and house dust mites, dander, perendured hatefulone comments offered under roof. in school and online, mostly related to fumes, cleaning products and food ingredients (e.g. beef, his sexual orientation.

chicken, pork, corn, wheat or soy).

Proceeds from UpLift’s “Twenty 11” willposted go towards a scholarship On the night before his death, Rodemeyer a lyric from Lady at Esquared Pilates certification program to “Don’t be awarded to an Gaga’s song “The Queen” on his Facebook page: forget me It often takes some detective findalso outbe what subunderprivileged parent.

A work portiontowill donated when I come cryingsingle to heaven’s door.”

stance is causing the allergic reaction. Dogs with a food al-

tofew AIDS Project and Lungposted Cancer Awareness and to A later,LA Rodemeyer two final messages to support his lergy hours will commonly have itchy skin, breathing difficulties or development of fitness programs throughout the Los Angeles area. main public Tumblr blog. One said he really wanted to see his greatgastrointestinal problems like diarrhea and vomiting, and grandmother, who had recently died, and one offered thanks to an elimination diet by: willpop most probably be used toacrobat deterSpecial performances singer Derek Jameson and Lady Gaga.

mine what food he Vanguard. is allergic to. If your dog is specifically extraordinaire Vincent

That was his last entry.

allergic to chicken, for example, you should avoid feeding

Lady Gaga vowed to push for a federal anti-bullying to honor The will be Friday, August 19th from 8-10 PMlaw at Nightclub himevent any products containing chicken protein or11 fat.

Rodemeyer’s memory. There is a suggested donation of $10 at the in West Hollywood.

door and raffle prizes from highcrying, end services totweetpersonal Please note that foodreflecting, allergies maysalon show up inshe dogs at any “The past days I’ve spent and yelling,” training packages valued at over $500 will be up for grabs!

11 is ed to her nearly 14 million followers.

“It is hard to feel love when age. If you think your dog has allergies visit your veterinarcruelty takes someone’s life.” located at 8811 Monica Blvd., in and Westconducting Hollywood. a physiian. After takingSanta a complete history

cal examination, heyrs or old, shetook mayhisbelifeable to determine “Jamey Rodemeyer, 14 because of bullying. the UpLift’s Founder, Jeremy B.ItManning, believes that your fitnessvet is will the Bullying become illegal. is a hate crime.” sourcemust of your dog’s allergic reaction.

If not, answer to many of the challenges we face today. “Our bodies were

probably recommend skinshe or added. blood “I tests, special “Imost am meeting with our President,” will or notastop designed to move and when you bringcausing the fundamental nature of elimination diet,end. to find what’s the allergic reacfighting.

This must Our out generation has the power to end it. our existence back into our daily life we back stronger as a person Trend tion.it @MakeALawForJamey.”

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and as a community,” says Manning.

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SIDING WITH

CHRISTIAN COMMENTATOR BLAMES GAY GROUPS FOR THE MURDER OF 15-YEAR-OLD LAWRENCE KING

by ZINNIA JONES

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WE DON’T NEED SECRECY TO BE SAFE, AND NO CHILD SHOULD HAVE TO LIVE WITH THE TERRIBLE BARGAIN OF FEAR THAT FORCES THEM INTO HIDING

I

n February of 2008, 15-year-old Lawrence King was killed at E.O. Green Junior High School by his classmate Brandon McInerney. He was shot in the back of the head at point-blank range in the middle of a computer lab full of students, and then shot again as he lay on the ground. Lawrence had often been bullied by other boys for being openly gay, and Brandon had been teasing him for weeks. Lawrence responded by flirting with him.

Brandon invited his friends to gang up and attack Lawrence, but none of them took an interest, so Brandon announced that he was going to get a gun and shoot him.

Several months after the shooting, Brandon told a psychologist that he was driven to kill Lawrence because he was insulted by his advances and because he wore makeup and high heels at school.

On the day of the shooting, Brandon claimed to have had second thoughts about it, until he overheard Lawrence claiming to have changed his name to Leticia. The psychologist testified that this caused Brandon to enter a “dissociative state” for the duration of the killing. A mistrial was recently declared after jurors couldn’t agree on whether to charge Brandon with first-degree murder or voluntary manslaughter.

In a case like this that so exemplifies the defense strategy of blaming gay victims, even children, for provoking their own death, it’s no surprise that those who bristle at the very idea of gay youth would be desperately searching for a way to twist this to their own ends. And Christian commentator Michael L. Brown has seized this opportunity in the most vulgar way imaginable.

In a column on the American Family Association’s news site, Brown tries to blame just about everyone except for the murderer.

Instead, he blames the school because they didn’t stop Lawrence from wearing makeup, which would have been a violation of California’s anti-discrimination laws. He blames gay people for opposing “any form of counseling that does not affirm homosexuality,” as if that would have been even remotely helpful here. He blames gay-straight alliances for allowing students to identify as gay “without their parent’s knowledge.” I didn’t know anyone needed their parents’ permission to have a sexual orientation. I’m pretty sure that’s not how this works.

But most of all, he blames gay rights groups for supporting gay students and encouraging them to be themselves in an environment that’s potentially dangerous to them. According to

Brown, they should be telling these students to live in secrecy for their own protection during the entire time they’re in school.

You know, it takes some real effort to miss the point so badly. Is this how we address bullying and harassment in schools now?

By making the victims responsible for concealing themselves, and letting fear and violence prevail unchallenged?

If this wasn’t about the harassment of minorities, no one would even entertain such an insulting idea. If schools were plagued by anti-Christian violence, would we see Michael L. Brown blaming Christians themselves for working to make schools safe for Christian students and encouraging them to stand up for their rights? Would Christians be at fault for allowing students to wear crosses at school and identify as openly Christian? Would he tell these students they should just keep it a secret for the duration of their youth?

And yet gay rights groups are now expected to be complicit in the silencing, erasure, and closeting of gay students, for no reason other than to placate those who despise them. They’re supposed to fall back and appease these threats instead of fighting for a learning environment that’s safe for every student. No one could possibly believe this is an effective, responsible, ethical or humane way to address any kind of bullying.

Unless, of course, you don’t think the harassment of gay students is something to fight against. Unless you think the goal of reducing bullying is somehow compatible with having counselors tell students that their gay classmates are sexually disordered deviants who are acting contrary to God himself. Unless you think that not committing violence against gay people is simply too much to ask of everyone else, and their victims should be expected to pay the price. Unless you lack any genuine concern for students who just want to go to school without being in danger every day. Unless you’re a miserable, hopeless wretch with a Bible for a heart!

Anyone who thinks this is a viable solution must not realize that this has been tried before. Gay people have had to stay closeted for centuries simply for their own safety, and this did absolutely nothing to eliminate the hatred that put them in danger. That wasn’t good for anyone. But when being gay didn’t have to be a secret anymore, that started changing. People who personally know someone who’s gay are much more likely to have positive attitudes, and schools that support their gay students and specifically prohibit anti-gay bullying are safer as a result.

We don’t need secrecy to be safe, and no child should have to live with the terrible bargain of fear that forces them into hiding.

Yet that is what Brown demands of them when he asks that we do nothing. There is a better way, and it’s not hard to see that the problem lies with the bullies rather than their victims. So why not start acting like it? When students are being harassed, attacked and even killed for being gay, the last thing we need is more of the same. And if your first thought after the murder of a gay student is that they shouldn’t have been so gay, what the hell is wrong with you?

Read more commentary by Zinnia Jones at: www.zinniajones.com/blog THEFIGHT

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un EPIDEMIC

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FRIENDLY SKIES

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BODY MONEY

By ANN ROSTOW

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Camila Grey (L), Leisha Hailey. Photo by Robin Roemer, www.robinroemer.com

SURE, YOU CAN SERVE THE COUNTRY AND DIE PROTECTING OUR FREEDOM, BUT NO KISSING ALLOWED! SOUTHWEST’S LESBIAN FIASCO

A

s I’m sure you have all heard by now, the L-Word actress, Leisha Hailey, got kicked off a Southwest plane last month after causing what sounds like a legitimate stink with the flight attendants. As far as I understand it, Hailey and her girlfriend Camila Grey kissed each other, causing at least one other passenger to complain. They were then given some kind of warning from one of the staff and naturally became upset. They were kicked off the plane for allegedly yelling profanities and causing a disruption, not for the kiss itself, but who among us wouldn’t cause a fuss if we were treated in that fashion?

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When I first read this story, like any decent reporter, I wondered whether there was some other factor. Were they making out in a way that would disturb anyone, gay or straight? Were they drunk? Was there something else going on? Because really, what Southwest Airline attendant would handle a simple kiss that way?

Southwest has no antigay reputation whatsoever.

Second, the story claimed that the attendant told the women that “this is a family airline,” another anomaly. Was this a rogue staff member? But if so, why didn’t Southwest jump into the media fray, denounce the “misunderstanding” and send Miss Thang to sensitivity training?

And yet, as the story continues, it seems to be a genuine case of severe antigay discrimination. Hailey insists that the kiss was no big deal, a simple gesture and not a make out session. She admits that she and Grey were angry, but as I said before, who wouldn’t be?

The situation is complicated by the fact that, all things being equal, every airline has the right, and possibly the obligation, to remove unruly screaming passengers. Indeed, Southwest says the women THEFIGHT

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yelled obscenities and were kicked off for this reason alone.

But this is disingenuous. Once again I go back to my racial analogies and ask what would happen if a flight attendant told a mixed race couple that they were on, let’s say, “a traditional airline,” and then asked them not to touch or show affection in deference to other passengers. Would the couple then be blamed for their outrage?

I’m sure Hailey and Grey could have handled this differently. They could have displayed maturity and discretion by waiting until after the flight to blast Southwest. They could have gone the passive aggressive route and kissed the whole way to El Paso or wherever, daring the staff to stop them. They could have berated the flight attendant in no uncertain terms, using their inside voices and demanding a full apology for the entire incident. But they didn’t.

That doesn’t mean that they were not the victims of a disturbing piece of antigay prejudice that seems lost in the confusion of the story. And try as they might, Southwest can’t neatly sever the outcome from the onset of this situation. It’s all of a piece and must be evaluated in its full context.

Meanwhile, in the last few months we saw a couple of women told to behave after brief kiss in a baseball stadium and we saw two lesbians asked to stop holding hands at a San Francisco museum, of all places.

You know what this does? It makes all of us wary. Every time we unthinkingly throw our arms around our partners, take their hand, give them a kiss, a little voice in our heads chimes in to say “you’re in public! Is someone coming to get you, say something to you, give you the evil eye?” It’s just a split second. But it’s a pervasive sensation.

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WEAREFAMILY THE ADVANCEMENTS IN REPRODUCTIVE MEDICINE ALLOW GAY MEN AND WOMEN TO HAVE CHILDREN AND BUILD FAMILIES OF THEIR OWN

by MARK ARIEL

Ready to start a family? Along with adoption and fostering, Gestational surrogacy is where the egg is removed from the surrogacy is a way gay and lesbian couples can expand their surrogate mother, fertilized by one of the gay couple or a donor, families. and then implanted into the intended mother.

“The advancements in reproductive medicine of the last thirty years Some couples solicit egg donors and then find a surrogate to carry allow gay men and women to have children and build families of the embryo. Others arrange for the surrogate to donate the eggs their own,” states Dr. Guy Ringler, a board certified physician in as well. both Obstetrics and Gynecology and Reproductive Endocrinology “An egg donor agency is the liaison between the egg donors and the and Infertility at California Fertility Partners in West Los Angeles. recipients otherwise known as intended parents,” explains Robyn “Each proud parent and child become ambassadors for gay families Perchik, Managing Partner at Beverly Hills Egg Donation (BHED). everywhere, changing the attitudes and perceptions of people “We recruit, screen, and interview donors. From selecting the donor wherever they go,” says Dr. Ringler, a gay man himself. to the egg retrieval, we help guide the intended parents through the Surrogacy by in-vitro fertilization (IVF) offers couples the chance to process,” explains Perchik. “Once the match has been established have a biological child. There are two different types of surrogacy: between the donor and the intended parent, the medical team takes over, but we remain available to help with logistics and facilitate Traditional surrogacy is where a surrogate mother is artificially communication with the intended parents,” says Perchik. inseminated by one of the two gay men or a donor. The sperm sample is collected either through masturbation or by removing it Some partners both want a biological connection to the child(ren). from the scrotum. The mother is given fertility treatments at least In this case, some clinics are able to combine the sperm of each two weeks before insemination. partner with separate batches of the donors’ eggs. The possible THEFIGHT

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A Caring Approach to Egg Donation Physician-recommended Beverly Hills Egg Donation continues to be one of the most highly regarded egg donor agencies in the industry.

Our “one agency fee until you’re pregnant policy“, in-person donor screenings and weekly cycle updates have made us one of the most successful egg donation agencies in the world.

All ethnicities Well screened donors Doctor recommended Specialized assistance for international clients

Professionals providing personal care to clients – worldwide To learn more, visit www.bhed.com or call us at US (310) 601-3132.

RESOU

result: twins - each with the same biological mother, but separate dads. If the process does not take, a DNA test will be needed to determine which donor is the father. Partners can also maintain a biological connection by choosing a relative as a surrogate mother.

One partner would donate his sperm to fertilize the eggs of the other partner’s relative.

“The surrogacy process allows your child to be biologically related to either one or (in the case of In Vitro Fertilization) both parents.

It also gives you the opportunity to become involved in the pregnancy itself. Your child is conceived because of your desire, hard work, and dedication to becoming parents: the true genesis of your child is his or her creation in your minds and hearts,” says Karen Synesiou, chief operating officer of The Center for Surrogate Parenting in Encino.

Providing gay men the opportunity to have children also unites families, says Synesiou.

“Most men who fell in love with another man thought they would never have a family. Through surrogacy, they could not only love each other, but raise a child together,” explains Synesiou.

“Just because your son is gay, doesn’t mean you can’t be a grandparent,” she added. “Families see it’s not the end of the line just because their son is in love with a man. Now it’s easier to accept.”

Some claim a child raised by two dads or two moms is unhealthy.

However, this perception is unsubstantiated. In fact, the American Society for Reproductive Medicine (ASRM), the leading voice in reproductive medicine, found no “persuasive evidence that children raised by single parents or by gays or lesbians are harmed or disadvantaged by that fact alone, the Committee concluded that clinics have an ethical obligation to treat all requests for assisted reproduction equally, without regard to marital status or sexual orientation.”

“Children thrive in families where they are loved and cared for; and happy families don’t need to conform to any one model,” states Steven Ory, MD, President of ASRM. “Good parenting is not a product of sexual orientation or whether a child has one parent, two parents or raised by grandparents or relatives,” states The Center for Surrogate Parenting’s Karen Synesiou.

“Good parenting is influenced most profoundly by ones ability to create a loving and nurturing home -- an ability that does not depend on whether a parent is gay or straight, or whether there is one or two parents in the home. If you intend to provide your child with a loving and nurturing home then we would be proud to help you,” says Synesiou.

Dr. Guy Ringler THEFIGHT

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“As a gay man who struggled with my own acceptance as a young man, I feel passionate about educating young gay men and women about the options available for family building,” says California Fertility Partners’ Dr. Guy Ringler. “It fills me with pride to see my gay and lesbian patients become beaming dads and moms with their beautiful babies.”

RESOURCES THE CENTER FOR SURROGATE PARENTING, INC. (CSP) CSP is a world-renowned surrogate parenting program with offices in Encino, California, and Annapolis, Maryland. CSP was the first surrogacy agency in the world to help a same sex couple realize their dream of becoming parents. For more information call 818-788-8288 or visit their web site: www.gaysurrogacyagency.com

BEVERLY HILLS EGG DONATION Physician-recommended Beverly Hills Egg Donation continues to be one of the most highly regarded egg donor agencies in the industry.

Beverly Hills Egg Donation works with the top fertility clinics in the U.S., and with clients worldwide. They provide a caring, consultative approach to help you through the egg donation process. For more information call 310-601-3132 or visit their web site: www.bhed.com

CALIFORNIA FERTILITY PARTNERS California Fertility Partners is a medical practice dedicated to the evaluation and treatment of male and female reproductive issues. For over twenty-five years California Fertility Partners has been helping Gay and Lesbian men and women build families through surrogacy and reproductive procedures. For more information call 310-828-4008 or visit their web site: www. californiafertilitypartners.com

THE POP LUCK CLUB The mission of the Los Angeles based Pop Luck Club (PLC) is to advance the well being of gay prospective parents, gay parents and their children. PLC produces special community events, such as our annual “Kids’ Fun Fair,” and co-sponsors other events, such as “Families In The Desert” with The Family Equality Council. For more information call 323-854-0656 or visit their web site: www.popluckclub.org

MAYBE BABY Maybe Baby is a co-gender group for LGBT prospective parents that meet to learn about and discuss various topics about forming a family. For more information, including topics and meeting time and location, please send an e-mail to: maybebaby@lagaycenter.org.

California Fertility Partners Guy Ringler, M.D.

www.californiafertilitypartners.com

GAY & LESBIAN FAMILY BUILDING

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OVERCOMING DOMESTIC ABUSE, DRUG ADDICTION AND OTHER DEMONS, WeHO’S ELEVATION FITNESS DIRECTOR JEREMY MANNING TALKS ABOUT THE LONG ROAD TO RECOVERY

by MARK ARIEL

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PHOTO J. HORTON

“I WORKED AS AN INDEPENDENT TRAINER AND MANAGED A STEADY FLOW OF CLIENTS WHILE CONCEALING MY ALCOHOLISM AS BEST I COULD.”

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grew up in Flint, Michigan during the decline of the automotive industry. My dad was an old school Irish alcoholic who died when I was 9. I found out shortly after that he wasn’t really my dad, but my grandfather. I should have been grateful for being adopted and not ending up in a home somewhere, but the news fractured the connection I had with my family and left me confused and isolated.

progressed, I fought hard to gain the respect of my peers and was eventually inducted into the Honorary Order of the Spur. Despite my decorated performance, I was lost and spiraling further into isolation and despair.

After my discharge I returned home one last time where I picked up a nasty little cocaine habit. I struggled to find work in a place I didn’t belong until I eventually decided to leave Flint for good.

After his death, my family moved into a trailer park on the south side of Flint. I used to walk through the projects to get to school thinking, “damn these are some nice apartments.” I bought my first piece of crack when I was 14, with a friend who knew a guy. I drank almost every day and struggled through school because of manic episodes, sleepless nights and paralyzing depression.

ROAMING THE STREETS

FACING MY ABUSER When I was 17 I left home for the first time, traveling with a magazine sales crew trying to find my way to California. After a few months of bouncing around the East Coast and making very little money I returned home to rethink my plan and subsequently face my abuser. He was my biological uncle, but I had grown up referring to him as my brother.

Whatever the relationship, I was done being his victim.

During one of his usual acts of violence towards me I decided I’d had enough. We exchanged blows and a few pointless words until I lost my balance and he slammed my head into the floor. For a moment I thought I had lost, until a rage rose up from somewhere inside me that I had never felt before. I just kept thinking, “not this time, not this time, not this time” and I drove my shoulder hard into his gut. We crashed through a glass door and into the grass outside. Rain, bloody shards of glass and my unrelenting fists met him on the ground. He moved out that night and I went back to school, got my GED and joined the Army shortly after.

Since the military frowns on drug use and favors random urine tests, I chased my demons to the bottom of a bottle. Surrounded by mass homophobia and a growing sense of delusion as my addictions and illness

Somehow I managed to make my way to San Francisco without selling my ass and worked in a 24 hour diner on the days when I was awake and high on Crystal Meth. I would stay awake and high for 3 to 4 days straight while I worked and passed out on my off days in the seedy civic center hotel where I lived. For five years I lived the life of the insane. Roaming the streets at night clouded in delusion and desperation. I’d grown up reflecting on the lessons I’d learned from “After School Specials” and never really made the connection with the addicts I’d seen on TV. I knew I had a problem with M eth the night I couldn’t get hold of my dealer and decided to pick up a hooker from Polk Street so I could score a bag. I’d never seen a tranny hooker on an “After School Special” but this is where my best thinking lead me. On our way to the room a door was kicked in and someone was passed out on the floor, his legs extended into the hall. Roaches the size of mice crawled along the walls and the place smelled like vomit and wine. I bought the bag and hauled ass out of there. The next day I checked into New Leaf Recovery Center and started my journey back to life.

Shortly after being mugged at knife point I discovered the Triangle Martial Arts Association. I worked my recovery program, imperfectly, but progressively and competed in martial arts until I eventually made it to an international championship where I placed 3rd in 2 of 3 events. Competing in a world martial arts tournament was one of my biggest dreams. I felt I was finally on the right path.

After several years of progressing as a trainer I moved to LA where I started training at Elevation Fitness in West Hollywood. For three years I worked as an independent trainer and managed a steady flow of clients while concealing my alcoholism as best I could. In 2010 a car accident lead me to my first AA meeting where I experienced a great deal of positive change. Almost a year later, just as my life began to reflect some kind of order again, my mom passed away from Alzheimer’s and I felt the familiar sense of devastation rise in my mind. I had come so far, made leaps and bounds in my recovery, but I knew I couldn’t face this alone. So I reached out to the owners of Elevation and Liddy Health Works whooffered to help me any way they could.

At the funeral I experienced a sensation that I can only describe as a spiritual awakening. At that moment I saw myself through her eyes and once again, everything in my life was about to change. I returned to LA with a new found determination to live the wonderful life she always wanted for me. For my entire life I’ve felt like I didn’t belong but the Liddy’s and trainers at Elevation gave me something I had searched for 25 years to find, a place where I finally feel at home.

I launched UpLift Project immediately after my return in an effort to reach out to the community of fighters in LA. Because fitness has always been a powerful force in my life and in my recovery, I’ve developed a program to offer affordable services to survivors of abuse, addiction and serious illness and to reach out to anyone who still fights for their life.

Elevation Fitness acquired my personal training business and I am now a partner and the Director of Personal Training.

We’ve been working hard to develop programs to improve performance, prevent injury and improve quality of life for all of our clients. We’re expanding our services and staff as we grow at a rapid pace because we believe that fitness is the answer to Elevate your life!

For info on Elevation Fitness please visit: www.efitla.com. For info on the Uplift Project please visit: www.upliftprojectla.com THEFIGHT

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ALTERED HIV CAN’T EVADE IMMUNE SYSTEM

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BODY

This column is sponsored by Edwin’s Prescription Pharmacy, www.edwinsrxpharmacy.com

The researchers treated HIV with a chemical to remove cholesterol from the viral coat. Then they introduced either the cholesterol-diminished or normal HIV to human immune cells growing in culture dishes, and measured how the cells responded. The cells exposed to cholesterol-diminished HIV didn’t release any initial-response interferons, whereas the cells “Something about the HIV virus turns down the im- exposed to normal HIV did. mune response, rather than triggering it, making it a tough target for vaccine development,” says David “The altered HIV doesn’t overwhelm the system and Graham, Ph.D., assistant professor of molecular and instead triggers the innate immune response to kick comparative pathobiology and medicine. “We now in, like it does with any first virus encounter,” says seem to have a way to sidestep this barrier,” he adds. Graham.

Researchers at Johns Hopkins have modified HIV in a way that makes it no longer able to suppress the immune system, reports ScienceDaily at www.sciencedaily.com. Their work, they say in a report published in the journal Blood, could remove a major hurdle in HIV vaccine development and lead to new treatments.

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Typically, when the body’s immune system cells encounter a virus, they send out an alarm by releasing chemicals called interferons to alert the rest of the body to the presence of a viral infection. When the immune cells encounter HIV, however, they release too many interferons, become overwhelmed and shut down the subsequent virus-fighting response.

The researchers had learned from other studies that when human immune cells (white blood cells) are depleted of cholesterol, HIV can no longer infect them. It turns out the coat that surrounds and protects the HIV viral genome also is rich in cholesterol, leading the Johns Hopkins team to test whether viruses lacking cholesterol could still infect cells at all.

Researchers tested blood samples from people with previous exposure to HIV in order to see if their blood could mount an adaptive immune response. Blood samples were used from 10 HIV positive people and from 10 people repeatedly exposed to HIV who weren’t infected. The researchers didn’t expect the HIV-positive blood to respond to either version of HIV because of the severely damaged immune systems of HIV patients. However, when cholesterol-diminished HIV was introduced to the non-infected HIV blood in a tube, the cells of the adaptive immune response reacted against the virus. By altering the virus, explains Graham, the researchers were able to reawaken the immune system’s response against HIV and negate HIV’s immunosuppressive properties.

“In addition to vaccine applications, this study opens the door to developing drugs that attack the HIV viral coat as an adjunct therapy to promote immune system detection of the virus,” says Graham.

BY ALTERING THE VIRUS RESEARCHERS WERE ABLE TO REAWAKEN THE IMMUNE SYSTEM’S RESPONSE AGAINST HIV THEFIGHT THEFIGHT 24

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by ANN ROSTOW DON’T ASK ABOUT OUR LEAD STORY Six out of the first seven news stories on “Google gay” on the morning of September 21st concerned the end of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell. The other one, which naturally attracted my attention by virtue of its original content, concerned basketball star Rudy Gay, who has been injured since the end of last season.

Good news. He’s back! After seven months of re-hab for a dislocated shoulder, the Memphis Grizzlies forward was cleared for action and looked pretty good in his first practice game, sports writers say.

Good luck, man. The gay community is behind you, because we love your name.

Sally Kern, R- OKLAHOMA CITY

Oh, don’t get your knickers in a twist. Of course we’ll discuss the end of the military ban. That said, the demise of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell is not “news,” per se. The news surrounding our inevitable arrival at the September 20 deadline involves the happiness of gay soldiers, the relief of their families, and the overarching theme of how America can inflict injustice and then change its collective mind in the short space of two decades.

For the record however, the end of Don’t Ask was not a political achievement but a court victory that put the fear of God (and/or the federal judiciary) into the hearts of lame duck lawmakers last December. The challenge to Don’t Ask continues in the Ninth Circuit as I write, and while the administration has asked the court to drop the challenge to Don’t Ask in view of the law’s repeal, our side has insisted that the legal process continue to a conclusion, hoping for a federal constitutional precedent in our favor.

Naughty bisexual squids

Not only would such a precedent improve our legal position in future gay rights cases, it could also support civil claims against the government by former gay service members. Further, only the courts can make sure Don’t Ask does not rise, Lazarus-like from the grave, at the hands of some future conservative Congress or Chief Executive.

FIGHTING FOR MARRIAGE ON BOTH SIDES OF THE BALL So, I got a fund raising call the other day from activists in Maine, who are collecting petitions for a marriage equality ballot measure.

I must say that it’s nice to be on the offense once in a while And speaking of going on offense, look for lawmakers in Washington, New Jersey and Maryland to get into the marriage equality fight this year or next. I’m sure there will be others, or may be others already that I can’t think of right this moment.

Animal Hoarder’s Lisa THEFIGHT

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In short, we’re in fighting form on the marriage front, where we also have a few defensive challenges ahead. As you may recall, Minnesota has put an antigay constitutional amendment on the 2012 ballot, and North Carolina just put one on the primary ballot next May. Damn them to Hell!

IOWA MARRIAGE IN JEOPARDY

UNACCEPTABLE!

Forgive the outburst dear readers. The development that really struck me in recent weeks came out of Iowa, where one vote in the state senate has thus far saved us from possibly seeing our existing right to marry be stripped away in a public repeal.

Finally, with all the electoral, legislative and court battles shaping up ahead of us, why do we waste our time taking aim at our craziest foes? The antigay ravings of some fringe nutcase in the Oklahoma legislature are really not our biggest threat. Yet the other day, the Human Rights Campaign organized a massive email campaign after Sally Kern (R-Middle of Nowhere) said gays are worse than terrorists.

Thanks to the unanimous Iowa Supreme Court, Hawkeye gays and lesbians have had the right to marry since 2009. A Democratic legislature and a Democratic governor helped protect that right up until 2010, when Republicans took over the governor’s “Tell Sally Kern her bigotry is unacceptable!” cried our DC lobbyists. mansion, the house and came within a vote of taking over the You know what? I don’t really care what Sally has to say. I’d rather state senate. For good measure, voters also ousted three of the be urging Iowa voters to elect a Democrat in District 18, or trying to seven high court justices who voted in our favor, the only court get Maryland lawmakers to reintroduce marriage equality. Actually, members up for voter review last November. Now, Republican I’d rather be lying around drinking Campari and soda and watching Governor Terry Branstad has slyly appointed a Democratic state “Animal Hoarders,” but you get my drift. My favorite recent Animal senator to some utility board or something, opening up a seat in Hoarder was a cute blond lesbian with OCD named Lisa, who kept a contested district that could go either way in next November’s 25 identical black and white cats in an immaculate house. It looked special election. Note to Senator Dandekar? Did you really have like an art installation. I don’t know what happened to Lisa because to take that job? Really? The bottom line is that we have to keep my wife came home and I had to shut off the TV to avoid having that seat if we want to avoid a Prop 8 scenario that strips the to explain why I was watching “Animal Hoarders” in the first place. right to marry from gays in the Ethanol State.

Drop me a line if you saw the whole show.

OCTOPUSSY Let’s see what else we can discuss. Have you read about the male bisexual deep sea squids who can’t tell the difference between boy squids and the girl squids thanks to lack of visibility and a certain, shall we say, androgynous squid physiology? Scientists sent some equipment down there to watch these creatures, for whatever reason, and they managed to identify some females and some males using their high fallutin’ scientific techniques. To their surprise, they noticed sperm deposits on both the males and the females, suggesting that the promiscuous male squids couldn’t care less about picking a mate and were more than happy to spray away at random.

Can you believe those squid? You know what they say. What happens at the bottom of the sea stays at the bottom of the sea.

Guess the nosy scientists took care of that.

MICHIGAN MISCHIEF I suppose I must mention the nasty bill to ban domestic partner benefits for Michigan’s unmarried public employees. This one passed the house the other day on a party line vote and now heads to the state senate. Interestingly (to me) the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit recently overturned a very similar attempt by the state of Arizona to cut such benefits in order to “save money” in a case I told you about last month. Cost cutting is also the rationale for the Michigan move, even though savings are negligible so perhaps the effort is constitutionally doomed.

Ann Rostow writes news analysis columns for THE FIGHT and other gay publications across the country. Rostow can be reached at: arostow@aol.com

THEFIGHT

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PREVENTION TIPS

1 DRINK MORE COFFEE Regular, decaf -it’s all good, say Harvard researchers. They found that men who drank six or more cups of regular or decaf coffee daily were 59 percent less likely to develop advanced prostate cancer than non-drinkers.

2 GIVE YOURSELF A HAND A 2004 study in the Journal of the American Medical Association found that guys who had 21 or more orgasms a month were about 30 percent less likely to develop prostate cancer than those who racked up only four to seven a month.

3 GO RED, GO GREEN Eat more cooked tomato products to reduce your risk of prostate cancer, say Harvard researchers. Credit goes to lycopene, a pigment in tomatoes that’s more potent after they’re cooked. And regularly eating broccoli may also lower your risk of prostate cancer. Scientists have found a disease-fighting benefit from consuming just 4 servings of the vegetable a week.

4 MOVE IT Exercise reduces the risk of fatal forms of prostate cancer by 41 percent. What’s more, among survivors of prostate cancer, those who exercised vigorously (playing tennis, running, swimming, or biking) for 5 hours a week had a 56 percent lower risk of death from the disease.

5 GO FISH In studies on lab animals, the omega-3 fatty acids DHA and EPA in fish oil inhibited tumors. Harvard researchers found that men who ate fish three times a week reduced their risk of aggressive prostate cancer by 25 percent.

6 DITCH THE DOUGHNUTS Men with the highest blood levels of trans fats have more than twice the prostate-cancer risk of men with the lowest levels. Transfatty acids increase inflammation and insulin resistance, both of which may play a role in prostate cancer. Avoid commercially baked doughnuts and cookies, as well as packaged baked goods containing hydrogenated oil.

Prostate cancer is the second most common cancer among men in the United States. Prostate cancer is most common in older men. Most men diagnosed with prostate cancer do not die of it. Prostate cancer screening can help identify cancer early on, when treatment is most effective. A normal PSA test, combined with a digital rectal exam, can help reassure you that it’s unlikely you have prostate cancer.

The following tips may help reduce your risk of prostate cancer.

THEFIGHT

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7 WANT SOME FLAXSEED WITH THAT? A few studies show that a low-fat diet, supplemented with doses of ground flaxseed, may slow the growth of prostate cancer in humans and animals. More studies need to be done, but a daily tablespoon of ground flaxseed a day (which contributes 3 grams of fiber along with healthy omega-3 fatty acids, phytoestrogens, and phytochemicals) is, in general, a good thing to do for your health.

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FREE AT LAST? WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN MY FREEDOM CONFLICTS WITH YOUR FREEDOM?

by ANN ROSTOW

THEFIGHT

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H

ere’s one of the new twists in the long running battle between the good guys (us) and the evil ones (them). Instead of simply attacking gays and lesbians as sick misfits (a strategy that is so last century) the far right has started to insist that we’re the oppressors and they’re

the victims.

They can’t come forward with the names of antigay financial donors because the GLBT community might attack and harass the antigay supporters.

We can’t show the videos of the Prop 8 trial, because the anti-marriage witnesses might suffer from the ferocious gay community backlash.

What? Someone got in trouble for writing that gay marriage is a “cesspool” on their Facebook Page? That’s a violation of free speech!

Did the cute country inn refuse to host a same-sex union celebration? Why that’s just the exercise of their constitutional right to freedom of religious expression. Ditto for the Navy chaplains who don’t want to preside over a gay wedding or the Christian clerks who don’t want to handle the same-sex paperwork. How can the government force devout evangelicals to do business with creepy GLBT deviants? It’s not right! It’s not constitutional!

Here’s the easy way to untangle these apparently knotty conflicts.

Just substitute Black for gay and see how far these arguments fly.

Do we allow secret contributions to White Supremacy political groups based on the fear the Black community might react badly?

No. Can an employer sanction a staff member who writes racist screed on a public forum like Facebook? Of course they can.

Are Christians allowed to ignore civil rights laws based on a Biblical belief in the inferiority of Blacks? No. So why is this tactic working as well as it has, when it seems so clearly flawed? Because it has been working pretty well.

Marriage equality laws and other antidiscrimination statutes that cover sexual orientation are often riddled with religious loopholes.

The faith based initiatives that allow the government to funnel public funds to do-gooders at the local church often exempt the recipients from gay rights laws.

Those Navy chaplains? They were initially given orders to treat marriage as gender neutral. But after the Christian hissy fit that followed, that order was revoked for further legal review. Then, Republicans in the House added language in the defense appropriations bill that prohibits military chaplains from conducting gay weddings, even in states where same-sex marriage is legal. That language hasn’t been included in the pending Senate version of the defense bill, but still.

Aside from specific cases like this, the underlying issue is why anyone gives credence to the notion that people who hate gays deserve some kind of special understanding and some kind of protection from the rolling tide of equality.

The answer, in part, is based on a misguided notion of freedom.

Freedom, liberty, whatever you call it it’s the iconic American philosophy. We came to these shores in pursuit of freedom, fought the British to secure it, wrote the Constitution to protect it.

And yet. What do you do when my freedom conflicts with your freedom? Or what do you do when the whole society requires that some freedom, let’s say the freedom to run through the streets naked on Saturday night, be curtailed? What do you do if you’re a public school administrator and the students want to protest the

war in Iraq by wearing armbands? What if they want to wear Confederate flags on their belt buckles?

Where does the freedom to hate gays fit into our system?

Under the First Amendment, the government cannot trespass on your freedom of speech or your free exercise of religion, At least that’s the theory. But as we all know, you still can’t yell “fire” in a crowded theater. And if your so-called “religion” commands you to walk naked down Main Street every Saturday night, well you’re going to get arrested all the same. A religious belief does not trump general laws that apply to everyone and that serve a compelling secular state purpose.

HATING GAYS MAY BE CONSTITUTIONALLY PROTECTED. ACTING ON IT IS NOT. Does your Native American religion require that you smoke peyote in violation of strict state drug laws? Tough luck, the Supreme Court has said. Oregon has a compelling interest in banning such drugs, so your religious belief takes a back seat to the public good.

Schools must keep order and protect the educational environment.

Confederate flag belts are a catalyst for unrest and can be banned.

Armbands are a legitimate exercise of free speech and must be allowed. As for T-shirts, as long as they are not the antigay equivalent of a Confederate flag, they should not be censored regardless of what side of the fence they represent.

A private employer? That’s not the government telling you what not to post on your Facebook page. That’s your boss! If you get fired or disciplined for antigay postings or antigay speech in the workplace, don’t look to the First Amendment to help you. Company policy, in compliance with state and federal law of course, is up to the company. Does Widgets USA want a LGBT boycott because their Vice President went off on a viral Youtube homo-rant? I don’t think so.

And yes, they can fire you for that.

But here’s the main battlefield: it lies in the cities and states that ban sexual orientation discrimination in public accommodation, and it pits the antigay Christian business owner against us, his or her LGBT customers.

It pits the New Jersey bridal shop owner against the lesbian dress buyer. It pits the two guys planning their wedding in New York against the Christian owned bed and breakfast. It pits the gay woman who was halfway through her complicated fertility treatment against the medical practice that cut her off at the knees when they realized her partner was a woman. It pits the antigay bakery against the clients trying to order pride cupcakes.

But But But! they cry. It’s our religion! But it’s not their religion.

It’s not their religion, it’s their bigotry that makes them turn their backs, cancel the order, stop treatment, refuse the booking. The antidiscrimination laws on the books don’t target Christianity. There are plenty of Christian bakers, butchers and candlestick makers ready and willing to serve gay customers. Those that won’t have only themselves to blame, and if they find it hard to follow the secular rules of our progressive cities and states, then they can either suck it up and make the sale, or they can find another line of work that does not fall under the rubric of “public accommodation,” emphasis on “public.”

Freedom is not absolute. And while the freedom to hate gays will always exist, the freedom to act on that hatred will not.

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ame-sex couples in California need to keep in mind that even though domestic partnerships or civil unions are recognized by some states -- California, Vermont, Connecticut, New Jersey, Maine and Hawaii -- and gay marriage is allowed in New York and Massachusetts, you remain strangers in the eyes of the federal government. In fact, one financial planner points out that there are about 1,049 federal laws that benefit those allowed to take an official trip down the aisle.

“Any rights you would want to have as a married couple, you need to re-create in a legal document,” says Todd G. Sears, a senior financial adviser who founded the LGBT financial-services team at Merrill Lynch & Co. That will require a lot of paper. Some of the documents needed and the terminology will vary from state to state, but here’s a basic list that same-sex partners should have:

ANY RIGHTS YOU WOULD WANT TO HAVE AS A MARRIED COUPLE, YOU NEED TO RE-CREATE IN A LEGAL DOCUMENT

DOMESTIC PARTNER AGREEMENT SPELLS OUT WHO GETS WHAT IN THE EVENT OF A SPLIT OR DEATH. Wills and/or revocable living trusts and pour-over wills: Without a will or revocable trust, you risk having your assets pass to family members instead of your partner. It also allows you to name a guardian for minor children.

Advance health-care directive; health-care-authorization proxy; durable power of attorney for health care: Generally speaking, these documents appoint an agent -- your partner -- to make medical decisions on your behalf should you become incapacitated. They also will allow visitation, which can be denied unless you’re a spouse or family member.

Durable power of attorney for finances: This document designates an agent, whether it’s your partner or an adviser who will keep your partner’s interests in mind, to make financial decisions if you’re incapacitated, says Philip J. Hoskins, an attorney in Los Angeles.

Domestic partner agreement: Much like a prenuptial agreement for married couples, this document -- also called a living-together or property-sharing agreement -- spells out who gets what in the event of a split or death. “There is no such thing as gay alimony,” says Merrill’s Sears.

Beneficiaries: Be sure to review your beneficiary designations on retirement accounts, stock options, life insurance and any other assets.

Domestic-partner registration: In certain states, couples can register as domestic partners and will be afforded state spousal rights, such as the right to inherit without a will. But even if you can and do register, experts advise documenting everything, no matter what your status.

“Whatever you do, put it (all) in writing, even if you register as domestic partners,” attorney Hoskins says. “Don’t leave things to chance. Otherwise, you are stuck with what the state tells you you’re stuck with.”

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?

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WEST HOLLYWOOD PARK, 647 N. SAN VICENTE BLVD, WEST HOLLYWOOD. SUNDAY, 8:30AM. MORE INFO: 213-201-9255 www.aidswalk.net/ losangeles.com.

Starts and ends in West Hollywood Park, at the corner of Melrose Avenue and Santa Monica Blvd. Registration information and team lists can be found on the AIDS Walk website.

MUSIC PHRANC: THIS IS YOUR LIFE SKIRBALL CULTURAL CENTER, 2701 N. SEPULVEDA BLVD. SUNDAY, 4PM. MORE INFO: 310-440-4500 OR www.skirball.org. $15-$25.

The all-American Jewish lesbian folksinger, pays a musical tribute to the Los Angeles Woman’s Building, a groundbreaking collective that fostered feminist art and artists.

The renowned recording artist reflects on her personal experiences as a teenager at the Feminist Studio Workshop and the vibrant L.A. punk scene in the 1970s.

DISCOURSE UGLY FEELINGS: A QUEER BOOK PARTY REDCAT, 631 W. 2ND ST, LOS ANGELES. SUNDAY, 7PM. MORE INFO: 213-237-2800 OR www.redcat.org. $5-$10.

Three authors, Jack Halberstam, Wayne Koestenbaum and Maggie Nelson, delve into critical inquiry and tragic comedy, recognition and denial, and face up to the darker realms of human emotion as they read from their newly published books.

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 22ND

EVENT HALLOWEEN MASQUERADE BALL PRESENTED BY AIDS SERVICE CENTER EDEN GARDEN BAR & GRILL, 175 E. HOLLY ST, PASADENA. SATURDAY, 7PM-MIDNIGHT MORE INFO: 626-441-8495 EXT. 259 OR aidsservicecenter.org. $100.

Halloween Masquerade Ball held in the chapel of this former mortuary benefits AIDS Service Center and its outreach/prevention programs. The evening will feature premium open bars, psychics, acrobats, apparitions, and costume contest with cash prizes, and more.

MONDAY, OCTOBER 24TH

EVENT THE WALL-LAS MEMORIAS 5TH ANNUAL CONFERENCE ON LATINOS AND HIV THE CALIFORNIA ENDOWMENT, 1000 N.

WERNER KRASS, The Cabinet Of Dr. Caligari

ALAMEDA ST, LOS ANGELES. MONDAY, 8AM 5PM. MORE INFO: 323-257-1056 OR www. thewalllasmemorias.org. FREE.

Discussion about HIV/AIDS among California faith leaders. Faith, mental health, substance abuse, Latino culture and preventing suicide are among the topics. Breakfast and lunch will be provided.

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 28TH

EVENT HALLOWEENIE, BENEFITING L.A. GAY & LESBIAN CENTER HOLLYWOOD FOREVER CEMETERY, 6000 SANTA MONICA BLVD, LOS ANGELES. SATURDAY, 9PM 2AM. MORE INFO: http:// laglc.convio.net/site/calendar. $75 GENERAL ADMISSION. $20 PARKING

The final resting place of the stars is beckoning you to the hottest Halloween party on the planet. “It’s the one event everyone is dying to get into!” Your all-inclusive ticket for this costume-only monster bash includes; open bar, dancing with music by Dave Aude and Beau Dasher, costume contest with great prizes, go-go boys and special spooky surprises! VIP upgrades are available.

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 30TH

MUSIC HALLOWEEN SILENT FILM: THE CABINET OF DR. CALIGARI DISNEY CONCERT HALL, 111 S. GRAND AVE, LOS ANGELES. SUNDAY, 7:30PM. MORE INFO: www.laphil.com

Organ virtuoso, Clark Wilson will improvise an appropriately atmospheric sound track on Walt Disney Concert Hall’s magnificent pipe organ for this groundbreaking 1920 si-

lent film, one of the earliest, most influential and artistically acclaimed films in the German Expressionist genre, directed by Robert Wiene.

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 5TH

EVENT GREATER PALM SPRINGS PRIDE FESTIVAL PALM SPRINGS STADIUM AT SUNRISE PARK, 1901 E. BARISTO RD, PALM SPRINGS. SATURDAY AND SUNDAY, 10AM. MORE INFO: http://pspride.org. $10 PER DAY.

Scheduled performers include Frenchie Davis, Cece Peniston, Debby Holiday, and Cazwell, headlining the main stage of Palm Springs Pride’s new Arenas Road Block Party on November 5th. Pride parade will be held on Sunday morning.

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 9TH

THEATRE A MISSIONARY POSITION: A HOMOSEXUAL MULTIMEDIA STAGE SHOW REDCAT, 631 W. 2ND ST, LOS ANGELES. WEDNESDAY SATURDAY, 8:30PM. SUNDAY, 7PM. MORE INFO: 213-237-2800 OR www. redcat.org. $16 -$25

World premiere of this solo work for the stage written and performed by Ugandan American artist Ntare Guma Mbaho Mwine.

A searing satirical response to the rampant homophobia now gripping Uganda.

THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 10TH

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39

N. AVENIDA CABALLEROS, PALM SPRINGS. THURSDAY, 9PM, FRIDAY, 6PM, SATURDAY 7PM, AND SUNDAY 11AM. MORE INFO: www. desertleatherpride.com. $99.

One of the city’s most popular LGBT events and one of the largest Leather/Fetish Events in Southern California. 21 and over only.

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 12TH

EVENT USC LAMBDA HOME-COMING OUT TAILGATE PARTY

of everymonth,6-10pm The Village at Ed Gould Plaza, 1125 N. McCadden Place, Los Angeles 90038.

1-800-Gay-4-You or laglc.org POP LUCK CLUB Second Sunday of every month, 11am. Locations vary.

Los Angeles based organization for Gay Dads, Prospective Dads, and their families. popluckclub.org.

ARGUE PLAZA AT USC UNIVERSITY PARK CAMPUS, LOS ANGELES. SATURDAY, 1PM. MORE INFO: http://alumnigroups.usc.edu/ lambda. FREE.

GREAT AUTOS OF YESTERYEAR

Join USC Lambda LGBT Alumni Association, the USC LGBT Resource Center and Queer and Allied Student Assembly for the ultimate display of Trojan Pride! All are welcome! Tailgate will convene at Argue Plaza, nest to the Widney Alumni House, at 1pm.

Kick-off is at 5pm.

LOS ANGELES PRIME TIMERS

Los Angeles. For more information, call 323-860-7300 SENIORS SERVICES Ongoing, The Village at Ed Gould Plaza, 1125 N McCadden Place, Los Angeles. For more information, call 323-860-7359.

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SUPPORT Ongoing, L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center, 1625 N Schrader Blvd.

Los Angeles. For more information, call 323-860-5806

The largest LGBT classic car club on the West Coast.

greatautos.org Social group for older mature gay men and admirers

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Gay Middle Eastern

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40

LOS ANGELES GAY FOR GOOD

Gays making a commitment to volunteer for social welfare and environmental service projects.

12-STEP GROUPS

LOS ANGELES GAY NATURISM

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ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

gayforgood.org California Men Enjoying Naturism

BI-OSPHERE P.O.V. Every 2nd Wednesday, 8-9:30pm.

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Topic-driven discussion for women and men who identify as, or are exploring bisexuality.

TRANSGENDER PERCEPTIONS Every Friday, 8pm. The Village at Ed Gould Plaza, 1125 N McCadden Place, Los Angeles.

For more information, call 323860-7302 M-F between 6-9pm.

Social networking group offers a safe and welcoming opportunity for people of any age and gender identity to learn from others and to share experiences.

GET CENTERED Meditation Class, Every Saturday, 10-11am, $10. Gay & Lesbian Center, 1625 N Schrader Blvd.

Mondays, 6:10-7:10 p.m.

CRYSTAL METH ANONYMOUS Saturdays, 9:10-10:10 a.m.

DEBTORS ANONYMOUS Tuesdays, 8-9 p.m.

MARIJUANA ANONYMOUS

Wednesdays, 8:15-9:45 p.m.

Saturdays, 10:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m.

OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS Wednesdays, 7-8 p.m.

SEXUAL COMPULSIVES ANONYMOUS Mondays, 8-9 p.m.

Tuesdays, 8-9 p.m.

Thursdays, 8:15-9:15 p.m.

Saturdays, 12:15-1:45 p.m.

WOMEN’S NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS Saturdays, Noon-1 p.m.

DON’T SEE YOUR GROUP LISTED? Send Details to: editor@thefightmag.com

SPORTS LOS ANGELES LESBIAN SOFTBALL http://www.lagaysoftball.com LOS ANGELES LESBIAN TACKLE FOOTBALL http://www.californiaquakefootball. com LOS ANGELES LESBIAN RUGBY http://www.eaglerockrugby.com WOMEN’S SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA GOLF www.womensgolf.org/wscga LOS ANGELES LESBIAN POKER http://www.lalpg.com LOS ANGELES WOMEN ON A ROLL Luncheons, Comedy Nights, and Conversation Groups. www.womenonaroll.com LOS ANGELES GAY RODEO CLUB www.gsgra.org LOS ANGELES GAY FLAG FOOTBALL http://www.laflagfootball.com There’s also lesbian tackle football.

WEST HOLLYWOOD GAY RUGBY www.larebellion.org

PURE. TRAGEDY.

LOS ANGELES POOL LEAGUE Friendly Billiard teams www.lapl8ball.com GAY & LESBIAN BOWLING LEAGUE www.tavernguildleague.com SAGA LA Gay Ski & Snowboard Club www.sagala.org V.O.I.L.A. Volleyball www.lagayvolleyball.com GREAT OUTDOORS The largest gay outdoor recreational organization in Southern California. www.greatoutdoorsla.org GAY AND LESBIAN SIERRANS Camping, Outdoors, Hiking angeles.sierraclub.org/gls/ and family.

CHEER LA Cheerleading www.cheerla.org LA ROWING www.larowing.org

DIFFERENT SPOKES Cycling www.differentspokes.com Rides start in various locations in the greater Los Angeles area.

SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA BLADES Ice Hockey www.bladeshockey.com LOS ANGELES FRONTRUNNERS Running and walking club www.lafrontrunners.com WEST HOLLYWOOD SOCCER CLUB www.gaysoccer.com Comfortable, supportive environment for learning and playing the world’s most popular game.

LOS ANGELES GAY SCUBA CLUB www.barnaclebusters.org LOS ANGELES GAY ROCK CLIMBING www.lalgbtclimbing.com WEST HOLLYWOOD AQUATICS Swim and Water Polo Teams www.wh2o.org

PURE. FUN.

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THEFIGHT 41 8/22/2011 11:49:38 AM

THE THE

FINAL FIGHT CONTENTS

THE

EDITOR

THE

HEADLINES

THE

GAY END TIMES LAW

“THERE ISN’T ONE SINGLE CIVILIZATION THAT HAS SURVIVED THAT OPENLY EMBRACED HOMOSEXUALITY.” RESPONDING TO PAT ROBERTSON by ZINNIA JONES

THE

EPIDEMIC C

oming off the recent gay marriage victory in New York, perennial doomsayer Pat Robertson had some choice words for America. Recounting the story of Sodom being destroyed by God for trying to rape angels, he claims that “There isn’t one single civilization that has survived that openly embraced homosexuality.” Meanwhile, marriage opponent Maggie Gallagher says that “in the end, a civilization built against nature falls. Every time.”

THE

BODY

That’s quite the carefully worded prediction. On closer examination, it essentially says nothing of any substance. Sure, you can point to any number of civilizations that accepted gay people, and note that they’re all gone now, but what’s that supposed to mean? Is that all it takes to conclude that gay people must have destroyed them?

Because it doesn’t work that way. I bet they had plenty of straight people too, but you don’t see anyone blaming them. Unless you can point out how gay people actually caused their downfall, this is not a credible assertion. It is an incredible assertion. And no, stories about God do not count until he shows up in person. Really, if God is going to destroy us, doesn’t that mean we’d be doing just fine if it wasn’t for him? Wouldn’t he be the real problem here?

Why would we need God if we’re going to destroy ourselves? I don’t think we’re raping any angels yet - but feel free to prove me wrong.

THE

MONEY

E

THEFIGHT

42

Aside from how utterly irresponsible it is to accuse a certain group of posing an existential threat to society, these gay end times prophecies are nothing but a desperate cry for attention from an increasingly irrelevant movement. Gay marriage has been around for a while now, and people can see that the sky isn’t falling. If this is what it takes to get them to listen to you, you’ve pretty much lost already.

WHAT KIND OF CIVILIZATION IS SO FRAGILE THAT SIMPLY ACCEPTING GAY PEOPLE IS ALL IT TAKES TO DESTROY IT? Really, what kind of civilization is so fragile that simply accepting gay people is all it takes to destroy it? It probably wasn’t going to last very long, anyway. And if a society’s continued existence requires persecuting gay people, maybe it should be destroyed. But as anyone can see by now, this is a false premise and a false choice.

The only civilization that’s coming to an end is the one that straight supremacists long for. And we certainly won’t be missing it.

Read more commentary by Zinnia Jones at www.zinniajones.com/blog

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