9.09 Mercury On The Rise, August 25, 2005, Volume 9, Issue 9, MauiTIme by MauiTimes

HOME OF HOLOHOLO GIRL, COCONUT WIRELESS, EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK, CUNNING LINGLE, EH BRAH!, TAKE 5, LC WATCH AND POSTMORTEM ADVENTURES

■ AUGUST 25, 2005

■ VOLUME 9

■ ISSUE 09

■ MAUITIME.COM

■ FREE EVERY THURSDAY

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MAUI’S ONLY INDEPENDENT, LOCALLY OWNED NEWSPAPER

11 THE SHAPER

Chatting with Ole Olsen at Launiupoko

14 GRINDS OVER GLAMOUR

Good food to go at Honokowai Okazuya

22 THE BROTHERS GRIMM Troubled fairy tale

Mercury on the Rise

p.12

President Bush wants power plants to release more toxic mercury into the air. For Maui, this is a bad idea. By Cheryl Ambrozic-Mooz

All sale prices are after rebates including $500 college grad. Plus tax, lic. And $195 Valley Isle Motors doc. Fees. Vehicles may not be exactly as shown. Ranger sale price $13,201.57, 72 months at 6.5% apr. Deferred payments $20,213.25. Focus sale price $13,221.64 72 months at 6.5% apr. Deferred payment $19,713.28. Financing and APR is on approved credit. Sale ends 9/15/05.

AUGUST 25, 2005

MAILING ADDRESS: 658 Front St., Ste. 126A-7278 Lahaina, HI 96761 PHYSICAL ADDRESS: 505 Front St., Ste. 216 Lahaina, HI 96761

CONTENTS

office (808) 661–3786 • fax (808) 661–0446

VOLUME 9 • ISSUE 9

www.mauitime.com

COVER STORY 12

•Mercury on the Rise President Bush wants power plants to release more toxic mercury into the air. For Maui, this is a bad idea – by Cheryl Ambrozic-Mooz

14 Position (& favorite monster) Editor: Anthony Pignataro

MAUI COUNTY

anthony@mauitime.com (The Thing from Another World)

•Letters to the Editor •Eh Brah!

•Cunning Lingle •‘OUtside the Boundaries’

Associate Editor: Samantha Campos

sam@mauitime.com (Edgar, the Enraged Pineapple) Calendar Goddess: Kimberly L. Welch

kim@mauitime.com (Blacula)

Why The Maui News should stay out of the travel business – by Anthony Pignataro

6 8 10

Contributing Writers: Cheryl Ambrozic-

•Coconut Wireless •Overheard...

Mooz, Sara Artman, Caeriel Crestin, Gabrielle Poccia, Ted Rall, Molly Rettig, Eric Paul Shaffer, Chuck Shepherd, Cole Smithey

•News of the Weird •Ted Rall Cartoon

Illustration: Guy Junker, Glenn Watson Photography: Michele Furmato, Sean M.

•LC Watch •Op Ed: Sacrifice?

Hower, Jessica Pearl

If you support the war, then you pay for it – by Ted Rall

Interns: Ashley Fitch, Robin Horca, Heidi King

SURF & SPORTS 5 11

Art Director: Rudi King

rudi@mauitime.com (Willie Nelson)

•Tides & Times

Production Assistants: David Enzo, Wendy Higa

•The Shaper Chatting with Ole Olsen at Launiupoko – by Sara Artman

Advertising Executive: Brad Chambers

brad@mauitime.com (The Creature from the Black Lagoon)

ONO KINE GRINDS

General Manager: Jennifer Russo

14 15

•Grinds Over Glamour

jen@mauitime.com (Shreck)

Great food to go at Honokowai Okazuya – by Molly Rettig

•Employee of the Week •Dining Listings

Office Assistant: Becky Spector Web Design: Bump Networks

www.bumpnetworks.com

Hours, locations and price ranges of Maui’s eateries

Publisher: Tommy Russo

DA KINE CALENDAR

tommy@mauitime.com (Sleestak)

19 •This Week’s Picks 22 •Film: The Troubled Fairy Tale Brothers Grimm ( ) – by Cole Smithey 23 •Movies & Times 25 •BookPaulReview: Truth and False Confessions Wood’s False Confessions: A Life in Hawai’i – by Eric Paul Shaffer 26 •The Grid & Calendar Listings 27 •Take Five: Things I hate that most people love

MauiTime Weekly is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright © 2005 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. Maui Time Weekly may be distributed only by MauiTime Weekly’s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime Weekly is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime Weekly, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime Weekly are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime Weekly.

CLASSIFIED 31 •Personals 32 •Classified Listings 33 •Sign Language 34 •HoloHolo Girl 35 •Mind, Body & Spirit

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AUGUST 25, 2005

LETTERSTOTHEEDITOR

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IMPORTANT POINT ABOUT HOT DOGS It’s all good, the last issue that is. One bit of reflection, however, on the use of the German language. Now, the “Schnitzel” you are referring to in the last Kokusnuss Radio (Coconut Wireless, Aug. 11, 2005) is a “Wienerschnitzel” after the capital Wien of Australia—whoops—Austria (just checking if you’re awake): a breaded, very thin veal cutlet and nothing but a veal cutlet by the way. Which in itself is okay, unless you are the calf. The “Weinerschnitzel” you are referring to is commonly unknown in German-speaking countries; if it was known at all, however, it would be either a Schnitzel for or from a whiner or it would have to be a moaning, whimpering or howling veal cutlet, thin or not which, of course, as you and I know cannot be the case since veal in any moaning state would not be handed out on the plates of any concessionaire, regardless of [being] in a State Park or not, due to the veal’s undue state of expiration. -Thomas Holzer, Kula The Editor responds: Actually, I was referring to the popular though insanely unhealthy “Wienerschnitzel” fast food hot dog franchise. They’re huge on the mainland, and I was saying that if the state Department of Land and Natural Resources wanted to put food vendors in our state parks, then they should go all out. But I can totally see your point.

DOES CRAIGSLIST SELL HOT DOGS? I was saddened by the article about struggling alternative weeklies, which described Craigslist founder Craig Newmark as Public Enemy No. 1 (“Weekly Newspapers in Crisis,” Aug. 18, 2005). Craigslist fosters an incredible sense of community in an otherwise decentralized and alienated urban society, and deserves nothing but acclaim for the service he pro-

vides. I am a faithful reader of alternative weeklies and wholeheartedly root for their survival, but they must launch themselves into the present rather than point angry fingers at someone who already has. -Anonymous, via email The Editor responds: You know, I haven’t been to Wienerschnitzel in years. I think the last time I ate one of their hot dogs was during a game at Angels Stadium in Anaheim, California. I don’t know about you, but I like to keep hot dogs simple: ketchup, mustard, relish and onions. Yeah.

DID BEST OF MAUI TALK ABOUT HOT DOGS? Your 2005 Best of Maui (July 28) issue is superb! The art, the writing, the whole production, all came off really well. Congratulations. Great work. As one of my favorite movie characters, Goldmember, might say, “It’s a keeper!” -Roger Sussman, Haiku The Editor responds: You know, I’m pretty sure we forgot to include a Best Hot Dog category in this year’s Best of Maui issue. For that, I am sorry. We’ll have to do that next year. No idea who it would be, since we don’t have any Wienerschnitzels out here.

Maui Time welcomes letters commenting on our coverage, but only if they’re complimentary. If you still wish to complain about something, please have the decency to use plenty of bad punctuation and grammar—that makes it easier for us to make fun of you when we respond. Send your letters to the editor via e-mail (letters@mauitime.com), regular mail (Letters to the Editor, Maui Time Weekly, 658 Front Street, Ste. 126A-7278, Lahaina, HI 96761) or fax (808-661-0446). All correspondence must include your full name, hometown and phone number.

EH BRAH! Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less, changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent to “Eh Brah!” c/o Maui Time Weekly, 658 Front Street, Ste. 126A–7278, Lahaina, HI 96761 or send an e-mail to

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AUGUST 25, 2005

NEWS

I’d like to thank the numerous people who are making my life a hundred times worse than it had to be now that I’m staying at the fine correctional facility in Wailuku. When I first came here, you all had my back—especially my wonderful girlfriend. But after a long 30 days, you lost all the aloha and respect people believe Maui has. I can’t believe that my good friend—actually, my Godparents’ son—would take advantage of my girlfriend and leave me so depressed. How do you think I feel now that you’ve destroyed all the great things I was looking forward to after my release? Hope to see all of you real soon.

MEDIAWATCH

BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO

‘Outside the Boundaries’

Restaurant

Tides & times

Why The Maui News should stay out of the travel business There was a time when a daily paper of record like The Maui News was content to just report the news. The front page was for the news of the day, not self-serving puff-pieces on celebrities compensated by the paper. At The Maui News, those days are now apparently over. No one picking up the paper’s Aug. 14, 2005 edition could miss the 2,100-word story “She Craves A Normal Life,” about former Iraqi War prisoner of war Jessica Lynch’s recent vacation to Maui. Set in a large brown box across most of the front page and jumped to virtually all of page A3, the piece included six photographs, four of which were in color. The story, written by reporter Valerie Monson, was remarkable for its completely unremarkable repeating of already wellreported information: Lynch is a “pretty blonde” who “still comes across

PHOTO: ZUMA PRESS / JEFFREY GELLER

JESSICA LYNCH IN 2004

LETTERS

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as a country girl at heart;” she’s still recovering from the wounds she sustained in the first days of the Iraqi invasion when she was badly injured in a convoy ambush and held prisoner for eight days; the stories about her allegedly “fighting to the death” when captured were nonsense; she’s going to college in the fall to become a teacher. The story had no real news hook—no reason for its length, lavish use of photographs or even existence in the paper—save a single line that the casual reader probably skipped over without much thought: “The Parkersburg News & Sentinel, a newspaper near her hometown in West Virginia, and its sister publication, The Maui News, covered the travel expenses for her and two of her girlfriends.” Behold: The Maui News is now a travel agency! Who cares that Lynch hasn’t been news for over a year—we’ll fly her out here at our expense and then just write a story about that. This startling statement was matched by a note from News publisher Joe Bradley— who appeared in a front-page photo giving a lei to Lynch at Kahului Airport—attempting to justify why the paper was so generous: “It’s our hope that Jessica’s trip will be seen as a tribute to all of those in the military who have served in the Middle East.” In other words, Wheeling, West Virginia-based Ogden Newspaper Group, the parent company of the News and the Parkersburg paper—which ran Monson’s story on Aug. 15—paid Lynch to fly to Maui so its papers could then write a big story about her that would generate a lot of publicity about what a great a company it is. According to Bradley, Lynch’s “dream vacation” has been in the works since Lynch’s rescue more than two years ago. “When she was first injured, our company offered to bring her over,” Bradley said. “We heard she wanted to come to Hawai’i… At the time, she was the most celebrated person in the war. No one thought the war would last this long.” Refusing to say how much the trip cost, Bradley would only say that Ogden “covered her expenses.” He then added that the whole trip was to “thank her” for her war service. The problem here is obvious: paying sources for their vacations isn’t journalism—it’s public relations, and pretty crass PR at that. Dubbed “pay to play” journalism

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Tide-times set for Honolulu - subtract as follows: Kahului: 1hr 41min Hana: 1hr 23 min Makena: 0hr 32min Kihei/Ma`alaea: 0hr 22 min Lahaina: 0hr 40 min

in media circles, the act of paying a source for exclusive story access reduces an otherwise honorable paper like the News to the level of Oprah or the Today Show—programs that routinely engage in bidding wars for mindless celebrity interviews. “Paying for a source to take a vacation is definitely outside the boundaries of independent journalism,” said Kelly McBride, the Poynter Institute’s Ethics Group Leader, in an Aug. 17, 2005 email to Maui Time. Based in St. Petersburg, Florida, the Poynter Institute provides seminars and training on journalistic ethics and techniques. McBride gave three reasons why newspapers ought not to be paying sources. “First, Lynch might feel obligated to participate in stories in return for the vacation,” McBride wrote. “She might feel pressure to say certain things or act in a certain way, because she thinks the journalists expect her to do so.” Sources who feel compelled to “say certain things” in exchange for a reward makes a journalist’s job of finding out what’s actually going on in the world all but impossible. Bradley denied this was the case here, though he did say that covering the vacation was always part of the deal. “We’re in the newspaper business,” he said. “I think [Lynch] knew we would do a story on her.” But even if giving Lynch a free trip to Maui didn’t affect her answers to Monson’s questions at all, the practice is still wrong. There’s no escaping that such practices shape readers’ perceptions of how reporters go about gathering information for a story. “[R]eaders are likely to see those stories about Lynch as less than credible,” McBride wrote, “because [they] are likely to assume Lynch was ‘rewarded’ for her participation in the story.” And that casts doubt on the paper as a whole, to say nothing of the whole journalism profession. “Finally, readers and sources will doubt the authenticity of other stories,” wrote McBride. “They are likely to generalize that this stuff happens all the time and every source who gets in the paper gets a reward. Thus the information itself loses its value. And journalists become less credible.” In any case, the irony of splashing so much hype and coverage on Lynch, whose greatest wish is apparently a “normal life,” seemed completely lost on the News. In fact, Monson went out of her way to point out how Lynch has lately been showered with gifts from publicity-seekers. “Because others in the war have suffered far more crippling injuries than she did, Lynch has been criticized for all the goodies she later got,” Monson wrote. “Lynch has also learned the dark side of celebrity. When she’s asked to make a public appearance, even for a good cause, there’s usually people with their hand out.” MTW

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Sun R 6:13A Fri Sun S 6:52P

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28 Sun R 6:14A Sun Sun S 6:51P

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29 Sun R 6:14A Mon Sun S 6:50P

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30 Sun R 6:15A Tue Sun S 6:49P

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31 Sun R 6:15A Wed Sun S 6:48P

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Cunning Lingle What Governor Linda Lingle said at Maui Economic Opportunity’s 40th anniversary celebration, according to the Aug. 14, 2005 Maui News: “The state is proud of its partnership with MEO, and these [state] funds are part of our continuing effort to ensure that those who need assistance, such as Maui’s dialysis patients, will continue to have access to MEO’s invaluable services.”

What she didn’t say: On the same day the News reported the above quote—on the same page, in fact—the paper also ran a story on a recent University of Hawai’i study showing the gap between rich and poor in the state has widened ever further. In the last three decades, the poorest fifth of the state population has lost seven percent of its income while the richest fifth has benefited from a 31 percent income increase. So it’s good Lingle supports groups like MEO, because they’re going to need all the help they can get. -Anthony Pignataro

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

MAUICOUNTY

BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO

WEDNESDAY, AUG. 17 Perhaps because he’s tired making light of how American soldiers in Cuba, Iraq and Afghanistan have brutalized, tortured and on occasion beat a prisoner or two to death, nationally syndicated talk radio fat ass Rush Limbaugh decided to blast the Akaka-Stevens Bill today. “It’s yet another piece of legislation that seeks an apology from the U.S. for things that we didn’t do, and supposedly there have been grieving Native Hawaiians ever since,” said Limbaugh, who insisted that the bill would allow Hawaiians to secede from the Union. How ironic, considering that the really radical native activists oppose Senator Daniel Akaka’s bill precisely because it won’t allow that. But then the bloated radio guy who insists he’s no longer a prescription dope fiend summed up America’s imperial legacy quite nicely. “This [bill] is basically saying that certain races can say to America, ‘Screw you! You savaged us and you incorporated us into your country and we didn’t want to be here and you’ve got to let us have our land,’” he said. Then he explained that the White House is keeping clear of the controversy because they don’t want to hurt Governor Linda Lingle’s chances at becoming “a Republican Senator from Hawai’i.” You heard it here first, folks!

THURSDAY, AUG. 18 Quick, grab the kids—Wife Swap is coming to Maui! According to Maui County Film Commissioner Benita Brazier, the “popular reality show” wants a Hawai’i family to sign up. “Participating in Wife Swap offers families the opportunity to swap places and experience how another family runs their lives,” Brazier said in a

recent press release. “It is an incredible family experience and an opportunity to both learn and teach differing family values.” And how. The ABC television network describes Wife Swap as “a reality show unlike any other, where the battlegrounds are the kitchens and the living rooms [hello—bedrooms, anyone?], child-rearing is a subject of intense and heated debate [as opposed to real families], and the outcome isn’t a cash prize, but a couple’s opportunity to re-discover why they love each other and decided to marry in the first place.” And for one Nashville family, Wife Swap was also a way to find out that daddy was allegedly beating his daughter. On Mar. 24, 2005, the Nashville Tennessean reported that a Wife Swap camera crew got one show participant arrested after discovering evidence that he repeatedly struck his 13-year-old daughter for leaving the house without a coat. For some reason, ABC discontinued filming that particular story arc.

So the Associated Press is all hot and bothered today about the state’s impending doom—aka the new gas price cap law, which goes into effect in a couple weeks. Today the newswire sounded the alarm that the cap could actually push prices up to an unprecedented $3 a gallon on Oahu! Oh my God! That’s got to be one of the signs of the Apocalypse. Three whole American dollars—wait, around here gas prices are already at $3 a gallon. This is just speculation, but what are gas prices going to be a year from now, when we’re still handcuffed to that burning stovetop otherwise known as Iraq? How much further will they rise if Bush starts firing cruise missiles at alleged Iranian nuclear facilities? Or if we start dropping Rangers and Special Forces commandos into the jungles of oil-rich Venezuela? Oh yeah,

-Guy in the Pi’ilani Shopping Center in Kihei, Aug. 17

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AUGUST 25, 2005

NEWS

MONDAY, AUG. 22 I sincerely hope whoever invented work met a violent, bloody end.

we’re all totally doomed.

SATURDAY, AUG. 20 Limbaugh’s ranting a few days ago aside, you don’t have to look far in the local papers to see that Hawaiian residents and activists are increasingly displeased with the fact that Hawai’i has been a U.S. state for 46 years now. All I can say is, “What did you expect?” The United States was a giant country back in 1959—like now, it behaved like an empire—and Hawai’i was a tiny territory. It was perhaps inevitable that American ways and values, such as they are, would move in and pretty much squash the old traditions. Next thing you know, we’re talking about Hawaiians-only private schools, secession and $3-per-gallon gas prices.

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You know, if Hawaiians are serious about reclaiming their land and culture, then they’re going to have to start drawing lines—you know, between the excesses of American life and their own, older traditions. How about starting with those cruise line “megaships” we keep hearing about? The AP did a story on these monsters yesterday—how the cruise lines can’t build them fast enough, how they’re as long as four football fields, how they hold 5,000 people and so forth. Sure, these behemoths equal hundreds of millions of dollars in profits for companies like Carnival and Royal Caribbean, but how many tons of sewage and filth are they pouring into our waters every day? Lots? Lots.

TUESDAY, AUG. 23

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THE WEEK IN REVIEW

FRIDAY, AUG. 19

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So I’m driving into work this morning, listening to National Public Radio like a good little boy and they’re running Talk of the Nation or some such program that’s normally the audio equivalent of doing homework except that today they’re airing the greatest story ever. It’s on a New York City competition called Street Wars, in which players roam the city James Bond-style, trying to assassinate each other with squirt guns. Players, who sometimes operate in teams, wear disguises, chase each other on the subway and generally do all the secret surveillance and action hero stuff necessary to “wet” their targets. So I was listening to all this and just got blown away—figuratively, of course. So I rushed through traffic to work, raced up the stairs to our office and ran up to the first colleague I saw, who happened to be Rudi, our art director. “Rudi,” I told him breathlessly, “I just heard the greatest story ever!” He got excited and asked what it was, and I told him what I just told you. “Gotcha,” he said, somewhat less excited. “That was a movie. I think it came out in 1985. You didn’t see it?” Stupid public radio. Anthony Pignataro wants to be an astronaut when he grows up. MTW

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

NEWSOFTHEWEIRD DOGS OF THE DEAD Scientists at the Safar Center for Resuscitation Research in Pittsburgh announced in June that they had drained dogs’ blood from their bodies, filled them with a replacement fluid, and then revived them by successfully reinfusing blood three hours later, thus creating for a time “zombie” dogs. During the three hours, the dogs were clinically dead, with no heartbeat or brain activity, but after reinfusion and electric shocks, they came back to life, normal with no brain damage. (Not all dogs made it back, though.) A spokesman said the technique could be tried on humans within a year.

soak everyone, but apparently the park workers on duty had either forgotten to put water in the basin or had not noticed that it had all drained out.

POOR CANDIDATES FOR REHABILITATION Paul Meeter, 21, just released from jail in Elk Grove, Calif., in June on traffic charges, was arrested a few hours later and charged with smuggling out the orange jumpsuit he had been wearing while behind bars. And a 15-year-old boy, who had a juvenile-court hearing on a theft charge in Macon, Ga., in July, was accused of stealing about $600 from the blind snack bar operator in the lobby of the courthouse.

NEWS THAT SOUNDS LIKE A JOKE

UNCLEAR ON THE CONCEPT

In July, as teams of poverty-stricken soccer players from around the world showed up in Scotland for the “Homeless World Cup,” immigration officials denied entry to players from Kenya, Zambia, Burundi, Cameroon and Nigeria because they lacked funds for lodging and meals during the tournament. And in March, when Knoxville, Tenn., prosecutors ordered 582 parents of chronically truant students to a meeting to advise them of their responsibility to get their kids to school, 241 failed to show up.

In Lebanon, Ohio, Donna Rose, 39, pleaded guilty in June after being accused by prosecutors of allowing an older man to have sex with her then-15-year-old daughter. Rose’s behavior came to light when the man was arrested, at which time he produced a note, signed by Rose, which he apparently believed would absolve him. The note read: “[Curtis Lee Barnes] always had and will [have permission to have sex] until she is 18 or until they break up.” Barnes was convicted earlier, and both he and Rose were designated as sex offenders.

GOOD FINANCING CAN’T POSSIBLY BE TRUE A Philadelphia firefighter was hospitalized in critical condition, and his wife and their three children injured, in Atlantic City in June after an accident at the Steel Pier amusement park. The five were in a ride car on the Big Splash, where after a descent, the car was to slide into the water at a high speed and

Disbarred lawyer Robert M. Short, who was convicted in June for stealing $439,000 from his former Vienna, Va., law firm and who had been on the lam for two years, received a suspended sentence from Circuit Judge Leslie Alden (except for four months in jail), in part based on his promise to pay restitution of $245,000 to the law firm. However, Short’s offer was to pay it at a rate

BY CHUCK SHEPHERD

of $50 a month, which, without interest, would take 408 years to pay off.

HIGH STANDARDS High school basketball coach Drew Sanders, 49, was arrested in New York City in July in connection with his method of inspiring two of his summer-program players not to miss free throws. Sanders was charged with more than 20 instances of spanking the boys’ bare buttocks for missed shots. And the New York Post, citing a school system investigator, reported in April that high school teacher Rhianna Ellis, 25, had gotten pregnant from an affair with one of her students but had nonetheless later graded the boy a barely passing “65” in her social studies class, due to his laziness and tardiness.

LEAST COMPETENT PEOPLE The Chicago Tribune reported in June that a man waiting for a train at the Sox/35th Street station on the South Side had been taken to the hospital after a train knocked him unconscious as he bent over the rail platform looking for the cell phone he had just dropped. And WSB-TV reported in June that a man had been hospitalized in Forest City, Ga., after, according to a witness, attempting to repair a speaker wire by using, in some undisclosed way, a .22-caliber bullet. “At some point,” the station reported, “the man ended up with a piece of wire in his neck.”

RECURRING THEMES News of the Weird has reported on Americans singularly obsessed, beyond all distraction, with the alleged illegality of U.S. income taxes. In July, an Australian family was convicted in Melbourne of defrauding the Tax Office, after converting its farm in Victoria into the “Principality of Ponderosa,” claiming it was an independent kingdom that owed Australia nothing for its income from polystyrene box manufacturing. Virgilio Rigoli and his sons (including “Little Joe,” 25) had issued a Declaration of Independence in 1994 and required passports for anyone crossing the border “from” Australia. According to their lawyer, what initially angered the Rigolis was the Department of Agriculture’s bulldozing a crop that had become infested with a pest.

THE CONTINUING CRISIS An official monitor in the online role-playing game Second Life told BBC News in April that he knows of spouses of game players who have actually paid money to onlinegame detectives to learn whether their mates are committing “virtual adultery” with other players’ characters in the course of the game. Second Life encourages players to create a character and live out a made-up existence, which can of course include having an affair with another player’s made-up character.

MTW

AUGUST 25, 2005

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AUGUST 25, 2005

PHOTO: US ARMY / STAFF SGT. REEBA CRITSER

OPED

BY TED RALL

Sacrifice? If you support the war, then you pay for it “If America is truly on a war footing,” Thom Shanker asks in The New York Times, “why is so little sacrifice asked of the nation at large?” Military recruiters are coming up short of volunteers, yet neither party is pushing for a draft. No one is proposing a tax increase to cover the $60 billion annual cost of the Iraq and Afghan wars. There are no World War II-style war bond drives, no victory gardens, not even gas rationing. Back here in the fatherland, only “support our troops” car ribbons indicate that we’re at war—and they aren’t even bumper stickers, they’re magnetic. Apparently Americans aren’t even willing to sacrifice the finish on their automobiles to promote the cause. “Nobody in America is asked to sacrifice, except us,” the paper quotes an officer who just returned from a year in rosepetal-paved Iraq. “[Symbolic signs of support are] just not enough,” grumbles a brigadier general. “There has to be more,” he demands. “The absence of a call for broader national sacrifice in a time of war has become a near constant topic of discussion among officers and enlisted personnel,” the general claims. Northwestern University professor Charles Moskos says: “The political leaders are afraid to ask the public for

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any real sacrifice, which doesn’t speak too highly of the citizenry.” To which I say: Screw that. It’s not my duty to suffer for this pointless war. I’ve been against it all along, and you can stick your victory garden where the desert sun can’t penetrate. I was among hundreds of thousands of Americans who marched against invading Iraq in early 2003. Tens of millions cheered us on. The largest mass protest movement in history (so designated by the Guinness Book of World Records) brought together pacifists, humanists and people like me. We knew Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11. We didn’t believe that the same White House that propped up dictatorships in Uzbekistan, Kazakhstan, Egypt, Pakistan and Saudi Arabia—that had, when it suited them, supported Saddam—could possibly be interested in liberating the people of Iraq. When we scrutinized coverage of the CIA’s prewar analyses, we found that there wasn’t any. There were only reports dating back to 1998, ancient history in the intelligence business. We absolutely didn’t trust Dick “cakewalk” Cheney’s breezy predictions. Bush and Cheney ignored our concerns. Instead of building a solid case and bipartisan political consensus, they bullied and lied to Congress and the UN to scam us into this unwinnable war. Who can blame them? They

work for ExxonMobil and Halliburton, not the American people. But they, not us, broke Iraq. It can’t be fixed, it’s not our fault and it’s not our problem. There’s no reason to relinquish our creature comforts to back their grubby little oil grab. The most galling aspect of this fiasco is that it was entirely predictable. I know; I predicted it. Here’s my column written back in July 2002: “Most experts expect Iraq to disintegrate into civil war after an overthrow of Saddam’s oppressive Ba’ath Party,” I wrote. “Opinion of the United States is now at an all-time low among Muslims around the world. Going after Iraq will make matters worse. Why give radical anti-American Islamists even more political ammunition with which to recruit suicide bombers and attract the financial donations that fund their assaults?” I’m no genius, but even I could see that this war was doomed eight months before the invasion: “Do the Kurds deserve a homeland? Sure. Would Iraq be better off without Saddam? Probably. But if we’re smart, we won’t be the ones to blow over this particular house of cards. We have too much to lose and too little to gain in the mess that would certainly ensue.” Did I call that one or what? David Hendrickson, a scholar at Colorado College, tells the Times: “Bush understands that the support of the public for war—especially the war in Iraq—is conditioned on demanding little of the public.” Of course, Bush himself hasn’t given up a second of vacation or a single donated dollar, much less one of his hard-partying daughters, to the “war effort.” Sacrifice is a hard sell down here among the citizenry when we don’t see it starting where it should start, among our leaders. I’m already sacrificing too much for a war I always believed was stupid and wrong. I’m paying three dollars a gallon for buck-fifty gas and walking through gauntlets of over-armed National Guard boys at airports and bus stations. I’m in greater danger than ever before of getting blown up by a pissed-off fanatic. And I dread the giant tax hike we’ll eventually need to pay off Bush’s deficit. But these aren’t enough sacrifices for Bush and his vainglorious generals, who are planning “a Civilian Reserve, a sort of Peace Corps for professionals… a program to seek commitments from bankers, lawyers, doctors, engineers, electricians, plumbers and solid-waste disposal experts to deploy to conflict zones for months at a time on reconstruction assignments, to relieve pressure on the military.” If you voted for Bush, here’s your chance to plant your butt where your ridiculous car magnet is, smack dab in the middle of the Sunni Triangle. Good luck. MTW

LC Watch Fifteen Minutes

Jeremiah Michael McDougall was only in Lahaina’s Hecocks about 15 minutes. He drank no more than half a bottle of beer. He’d come in the night of Jan. 26, 2005 to see his best friend, who was working that night behind the bar. The visit and encounter are significant because a few hours later McDougall died in a car accident. Because McDougall—a back-seat passenger—had a high blood alcohol level, the Maui County Department of Liquor chose to pursue Hecocks on two counts related to serving someone already intoxicated (similar charges related to the same incident are also pending against The Sly Mongoose in Lahaina). Saying that dragging out the matter by trying to defend himself was prohibitively expensive, owner Tom Hecock pleaded no contest at the Aug. 4, 2005 Liquor Control Board of Adjudication hearing. He said the bartender reported to him that McDougall never seemed drunk and might have stopped at another party after leaving his establishment, but admitted he had no proof to back up either assertion. Board member Lance Collins then asked Hecock how he felt that McDougall drank half a beer at the bar and then got into an accident and died. “I’ve been doing this for 47 years,” Hecock said. “We don’t have breathalyzers. It’s our call. If [customers] come in and stagger, we don’t serve them. I’m doing everything in my power to make sure this doesn’t happen again.” Almost as an after thought, Hecock also mentioned that the bartender who served McDougall and his friends doesn’t work for him anymore. That really perked up board chairman Shigeto “Mustard” Murayama. “That’s the kind of thing we like to hear,” he said. “I didn’t fire him,” Hecock said. “He voluntarily quit. I guess he decided he didn’t want to do it anymore.” Murayama looked almost disappointed that Hecock was standing up for the bartender. After 30 minutes of deliberation, the board decided to fine Hecocks $2,000—pretty much what the prosecutor had asked for. The matter ended when Murayama inexplicably joked to Hecock, “We don’t want to see you again because our throwing arm isn’t that good.”

-Anthony Pignataro

SURF&SPORTS

BY SARA ARTMAN

The Shaper

PHOTO: RIC LARSEN

Chatting with Ole Olsen at Launiupoko Bob “Ole” Olsen was in the middle of a card game with some friends at Launiupoko Beach Park when I showed up to interview him. There were many people surrounding him, but he patiently and helpfully answered my questions. He was dressed casually, like a lot of people that day, in surf shorts and a T-shirt from the long board contest that bears his name. It was Aug. 13, the day of the 12th Annual Ole Longboard Contest at Launiupoko. The beach was packed with 13 divisions waiting to enter. There were myriad long boards ranging in size, shape and condition strewn across the sun-lit, grassy park in between the heats. The waves were small but consistent and considering the lack of waves in the previous weeks, any push or movement of water was welcome. In fact, the conditions were perfect for the longboard contest.

Ole’s contest is probably the best indicator of the end of the summer. The setting is a perfect environment for catching up with old friends and saying an excited aloha to summer and a hopeful aloha to the Fall swells soon to grace our beaches. I didn’t have to speak with Olsen to find out he’s a classic longboard shaper and an indelible fixture in the surf industry. He’s been well known and respected throughout the industry for a lot longer than the 12 years he’s been sponsoring the contest, along with companies like Hi-Tech, Rusty, Leilani’s, Hula Grill and Kimo’s. In between the card play Olsen told me he began shaping in 1948 for his own interests, initially working with wood because that was what guys shaped boards out of back then. Ten years later, he opened his own shaping business in 1958 in Seal Beach, California. At the time, when he wasn’t shaping boards, he told me he worked in nearby Garden Grove

as a high school wood shop teacher. He said he stayed in Southern California until 1971, when he took a leave of absence and moved to Maui. He’s been here ever since. He has continued shaping—he abandoned wood long ago—but still cranks out quality boards from his shop in Lahaina. Speaking to him gives a person the unmistakable feeling that he’s lived a fun, enjoyable life and continues to enjoy it. In many ways, he seems to have achieved the ultimate of what the sport of surfing can give you—that enduring stoked feeling that’s now considered a cliché. Considering his wealth of knowledge and history with the sport, he still exudes a real humbleness. I was still writing down notes when Olsen heard that it was time for his heat, the 60 and over division, to paddle out. Excitedly, he excused himself, grabbed his board and headed for the water. He ended up placing second. MTW

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Kimo Simpliciano, who placed third in the 30-39 division

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AUGUST 25, 2005

Mercu Volunteers with the national organization Environmental Action recently spent five days on Maui pounding the pavement in an effort to tell residents about President George W. Bush’s so-called “Clear Skies Bill.” The bill would, far from actually “clearing” our skies, actually allow fossil fuel-fired power plants to increase the amount of toxic mercury they belch into the air. Environmental Action’s work on Maui was part of its largest-ever grassroots campaign, which stretched across 16 states. “Overall, people don’t know about the impacts of mercury in our environment,” Field Manager Kory Payne told me. Mercury is released into the atmosphere by many different man-made and natural sources. Volcanic activity is a natural source of mercury emissions. Manmade industrial sources include burning coal or liquid fuel in power plants and refineries, mobile sources such as cars, trucks and buses and agriculture sources such as cane burning, and mining. Mercury poisoning causes brain and nerve damage, resulting in impaired coordination, blurred vision, tremors, irritability and memory loss, behavioral problems and loss of intelligence. Mercury also causes heart disease, cancer and reproductive system damage. “[T]he plain and simple truth is that this new [Environmental Protection Agency] rule will allow more mercury into our environment than does the current law,” U.S. Senator Patrick Leahy (D, Vermont) has said. “Hundreds of the oldest, dirtiest power plants will not even control mercury emissions for more than a decade. That is what this rule gives us: more pollution, for longer than the Clean Air Act allows.”

Power plants are the nation’s largest uncontrolled source of mercury emissions and the single largest industrial source of some of the worst air pollutants, including sulfur dioxide, nitrogen 12

AUGUST 25, 2005

COVER STORY

oxides and carbon dioxide. Because of the current Clean Air Act, the EPA requires power plants to reduce emissions of mercury and other toxics 90 percent by 2008. The law requires each plant to use the “maximum achievable control technology” (MACT) on every power plant generating unit to reduce mercury emissions. But President Bush has a different agenda. In February 2003, the administration submitted the “Clear Skies Initiative” to Congress. The legislation sets new, far weaker targets for emissions of sulfur dioxide, mercury, and nitrogen oxides from U.S. power plants. The Clear Skies Bill exempts power plants from incorporating the maximum achievable control technology. The Clear Skies Bill also extends the Clean Air compliance deadline giving power plants until 2018 to delay reduction of mercury emissions—but by then, they will only have to cut them by 70 percent. “The Bush administration is portraying the Clear Skies Bill as something palatable,” said Moria Chapin, Environmental Action’s Campaign Director. “It gives the impression that the Clear Skies Bill is reducing mercury emissions when actually it allows power plants to continue releasing almost seven times more mercury than enforcement of the current Clean Air Act would allow.” Bush’s bill is an economic approach to reducing mercury emissions. Instead of applying the technology to reduce mercury and toxins released from power plants, a “cap and trade” system allows noncompliant operators the option of buying pollution credits from other plants that have already managed to lower their mercury emissions below targeted levels. Power plants must meet EPA ambient air quality standards and submit annual performance tests quantifying pollutants like sulfur dioxide, nitrogen oxide, carbon monoxide and various other particulates to assure they are complying with their permit.

Wilfred Nagamine, Project Manager with the state’s Department of Health Clean Air Branch, said the proposed mercury rule is more directed towards the coal burning power plants in the Eastern U.S. All but one of Hawai’i’s power plants use fuel oil to generate electricity. “Emissions from fuel oil combustion are much less than the annual mercury emissions from coal combustion,” Nagamine said. “The small quantity generated from burning diesel fuel is not considered to be a concern and the DOH doesn’t see the need for mercury emissions testing.” While the DOH doesn’t require Hawai’i power plants to treat for mercury and mercury compounds, the EPA does. In Hawai’i, the most recent data (2003) shows that state power plants and refineries released 435 pounds of mercury and mercury compounds into the atmosphere. Within that, Maui Electric Company’s Ma’alaea plant released 33 pounds of mercury and mercury compounds; the Kahului plant emitted 16 pounds. Regional EPA and MECO officials say these numbers show that Hawai’i plants are already ahead of the nation as far as mercury emissions are concerned. Mercury in the waters around the state are another matter entirely.

No one really knows why there’s so much mercury in Hawaiian waters. What we do know is that metallic mercury from industrial sources is transported from the air and into the ocean, lakes and streams by rain and dust particles. Microorganisms then absorb it and convert it into methylmercury—an extremely toxic compound. Smaller fish then absorb it when they feed on contaminated microorganisms. Thus it rises up the food chain, steadily accumulating in the flesh of each succeeding fish. As a result, the larger fish have the highest

Rise on the ury President Bush wants power plants to release more toxic mercury into the air. For Maui, this is a bad idea. By Cheryl Ambrozic-Mooz amounts of methylmercury, which is then passed on to humans at the dinner table. And that’s why groups like Environmental Action see no need to open the mercury vents at our state’s power plants. “Hawai’i is too dependent on our local fishing for both our food and our economy to allow more toxic mercury from power plants,” Payne said. Mercury contamination in the ocean has already led the DOH and the federal Food and Drug Administration (FDA) to issue formal guidelines warning about the mercury content in certain fish. In Hawai’i, the warning covers primarily the larger pelagic fish like ahi, aku and marlin. In 2004, the EPA and FDA issued a nationwide fish consumption advisory on mercury. The alert targeted women who might become pregnant, women who are pregnant, nursing mothers and young children. The danger is because methylmercury accumulates in the blood stream over time. Natural processes eventually remove methylmercury from the body, but it may take over a year for the levels to drop significantly. Data from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control indicates that one in 12 women of childbearing age have blood mercury levels above those considered safe by the EPA. Based on the number of births each year, the EPA estimates that “more than 300,000 newborns each year may have increased risk of learning disabilities associated with in utero exposure to methylmercury.” Leslie Au, a toxicologist with the Hazards Evaluation and Emergency Response Office (HEER) of the state DOH is very concerned about mercury in our environment. “Methylmercury is the most dangerous form of mercury, since it crosses the placental barrier,” she said. “It also gets into and accumulates within the brain more easily than other forms of mercury, where it

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retards the development of a child’s growing brain, which leads to decreases in I.Q. and increased risk of behavioral problems.” In 2003, Au and fellow DOH officials researched the levels of mercury found in local fish. Visiting an Oahu fresh fish wholesale auction, they collected samples from 10 commonly eaten local fish. The samples included Albacore (Tombo) Yellowfin Ahi, Bigeye Ahi, Skipjack (Aku), Dolphinfish (Mahimahi/Dorado), Pacific Blue Marlin (Kajiki), Striped Marlin (Nairagi), Moonfish (Opah) and Wahoo (Ono). The mercury levels found in the DOH test samples exceeded the EPA’s acceptable daily requirement. “Fish advisories are not the answer,” said Sher Pollack, a public health nutritionist with the state Department of Health Special Supplemental Nutrition Program for Women, Infants and Children. “We eat a lot of fish in Hawai’i and we would prefer that we didn’t have to set any limits but since mercury bioaccumulates in our local fish, we have no choice.” The situation frustrates Pollack. The DOH wants to encourage a traditional island diet but not to the point of helping residents injest higher doses of mercury. “The technology to clean up polluting mercury emissions is already available,” she said. “The solution is to clean up this planet so we can eat fish without being polluted.”

The danger of mercury poisoning is a nationwide issue. As a bioaccumulative toxin, mercury remains in the environment for a long period of time and is not readily destroyed. Mercury from smoke stacks not only contaminates nearby water bodies, but also those far from the source. According to the 2003 National Listing of Fish Advisories database, the number of safe eating guidelines issued continues to increase. States, ter-

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ritories and tribes also continue to issue new fish advisories, most of them involving mercury. In 2003, there were a remarkable 3,089 advisories issued in 48 states. These advisories covered 35 percent of the nation’s total lake acreage and 24 percent of the total river miles. Fifteen states have issued fish advisories for all of their costal waters. Almost 71 percent of the coastline of the U.S. (excluding Alaska) is currently under advisory. In 2003, 92 percent of the Atlantic coast and the entire Gulf Coast was under advisory. Thirty-one states also currently have statewide advisories. Three states issued statewide advisories in 2003: Montana and Washington each added statewide mercury advice for lakes and rivers, while Hawai’i added statewide mercury advisories for marine fish. But there is hope. In protest to the Bush Administration’s attempt to lower mercury emission standards, Senators Leahy, Susan Collins (R, Maine) and Jim Jeffords (I-Vermont) have introduced S.J. Res. 20—their “Resolution of Disapproval.” S.J. Res. 20 would require the EPA to comply with the current Clean Air law. The resolution was placed on the Senate legislation calendar July 18, 2005 and could be brought up for a vote after legislators return from vacation on Sept. 6. Locally, Environmental Action considers its grass roots effort a success. More than 2,300 of their petitions in support of S. J. Res. 20 and against the Clean Air Act. have flooded Senator Daniel Inouye (D, Hawai’i)’s office. “We would like to thank Sen. Daniel Akaka for cosponsoring the resolution, and we’re excited that Sen. Inouye has indicated he will do the same,” said Payne. “This resolution is an important step towards enforcing that Clean Air Act standard. Our children deserve to have clean air and clean water.” MTW

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AUGUST 25, 2005

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BY MOLLY RETTIG

My first impression at Honokowai Okazuya & Deli was that I should have gotten take-out. The inside is a cramped corridor very reminiscent of those New York delis that don’t mince inches at Times Square rent. There is a row of stools at a long table against the wall, which seem only to have been built to accommodate people adamant on eating there, and a couple tables outside. A single counter separates the customer from the cash register, kitchen and prep line. Three or four cooks work their magic in a tight space, amid a hodgepodge of skillets, pans and food containers. This cloistered feel makes ordering an in-and-out experience. Most other customers on the busy Friday afternoon seemed in the know, darting in and grabbing their bags of lunch, then heading back home, the beach or wherever. The menu put everything in layman’s terms with categories like lunch & dinner, salads, pasta, hot sandwiches, deli sandwiches and broiler sandwiches. Cold and hot sandwiches and salads ran from around $7 to $9, pasta dishes $9 and plate style chicken, beef, steak and fish dishes from $8 to $12. Sensitive to the vegetarian appetite, they had a handful of veggie options with rice and salad between $7 and $9. An undeniable bargain. The very friendly cashier looked expectantly at me when it was time to take my order and I impulsively got the turkey and cheese melt—if that’s not spontaneity I don’t know what is. It came on a soft, fresh wheat Kaiser roll with mac salad and a nice, crunchy pickle. Nothing complex, but wonderfully good. One bite led to the next, and eventually I had the uncomfortably stuffed feeling that only means one thing: the sandwich was too worthy not finish at all costs. My friend Galya loved the panko-fried Mahi-Mahi, a meal that came with a baseball-sized scoop of white rice and flavorful stir-fried vegetables. Galya was visiting me from Moldova, a small European nation above Romania, and I have exposed her to Maui’s island cuisine for about a week. Of her meal she said simply (in perfect English with a heavy Russian accent), “This is the best Hawaiian food I tried.” There really was no shortcoming to our meals, and it occurred to me that this deli proved that sometimes less is more. As I dined outside, I thought about how such a little no-frills place could make the concept of producing good food seem so stupefyingly simple. Sometimes I love when restaurants transform food into an experience

They know what counts through atmosphere, entertainment and cushy service. But this okazuya reminded me that you also need a straightforward deli, where duty begins by asking what you want and ends by handing you food in a plastic box and wishing you a pleasant day. After all, it’s the food that counts, right? And because the goods are so satisfying and the price so reasonable, you leave thinking how astute the owners are for not distracting themselves with things like seating, dessert, having to wash dishes, etc. Just like mayonnaise on a tuna melt, a restaurant can’t spread itself too thin or it loses its character. Honokowai Okazuya caters to meat-lovers, veggie-lovers, fish fanatics, budget eaters and pretty much anyone who doesn’t need a white tablecloth or a silver spoon. It’s the kind of place where you can grab lunch or dinner again and again without feeling like you’re splurging financially. You can even take it out, bring it home and pretend you prepared it yourself. MTW

Honokowai Okazuya 3600-D L. Honoapi’ilani Rd., Honokowai, 6650512. Open Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 4:30 p.m.-9 p.m. Closed Sundays. $

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$→$10-$20

$$→$20-$40

CENTRAL MAUI Ale House - Wide selection of food with sports and games all around. 355 E. Kamehameha Ave., Kahului, 877-9001. $ Alive And Well - Healthy food, juices, smoothies, wraps, salads or plate lunches. Organic pastries, vegetables. Open daily, 8 a.m.-6 p.m. 340 Hana Hwy., Kahului, 244-5950. $ Aloha Grill - A large assortment of burgers with veggie styles and all the extras. Mon-Sat, 8 a.m.-8:30 p.m.; Sun, 8 a.m.-7 p.m. 270 Dairy Road Marketplace, Kahului, 893-0263. $ Bangkok Cuisine - Casual setting featuring exceptional Thai food with plenty of crisp vegetables and fresh seafood. Lunch, dinner or take-out. Open daily, 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m. 395 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 893-0026. $ Ba-Le - French-Vietnamese sandwiches, noodle dishes, pho, saimin and more. Plus, a large variety of tapioca. Mon-Sat, 9 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sun, 9 a.m.-7 p.m. 270 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 877-2400. $ Brooklyn Café - Delicious healthy alternative. Eat in or take out plate lunches and snacks. Finest organic whole foods used. Open Mon-Fri, 10 a.m.-3 p.m. Corner of Market and Main, Wailuku, 877-4950. $

$$$→$40 and up

K→Kama’aina Discount

Gardencafe (Brigit & Bernard's) - Oasis of cozy European and fresh island fish cuisine in the midst of the industrial zone. Lunch, dinner, catering. Mon-Fri, 10 a.m.-3 p.m. 335 Ho'ohana St., Kahului, 877-6000. $

Simply Sweets Bakery - Delicious sweet and savory pastries, rolls, cakes, Mauisadas and deli sandwiches. Open Mon-Thu, 7 a.m.-5:30 p.m.; Fri, 7 a.m.-6:30 p.m; Sat, 7 a.m.- 4 p.m. 150 Hana Hwy., Kahului, 893-0700. $

Little Ceasar Pizza Station - Specialty pizzas along with salads and sandwiches. Located inside of K-mart. 424 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 871-1566. $

Squeaky’s Family Restaurant - “A Taste of Philadelphia” with real Philly cheesesteak, pan-fried trout, vegetarian meatloaf. Open for breakfast. 197 North Market St., Wailuku, 244-4100. $

Koho Grill & Bar - Comfort food in a casual setting. Breakfast, lunch and dinner Open daily at 7 a.m. 275 Kaahumanu Ave., Queen Ka’ahumanu Center, 877-5588. $ Krispy Kreme - This place is known all over the world for its warm, tasty glazed doughnuts. 433 Kele St., Kahului, 893-0883. $ Manaña Garage - Latin-American cuisine with unique and colorful decor. Try the Chicken Tortilla Epozote, vegetarian enchilada and paella. Cool, quaint bar. 33 Lono St., Kahului, 873-0220. $$ Maui Coffee Roasters - Ono grinds and freshly roasted coffee in a fun and casual atmosphere makes this the place to take five. 444 Hana Hwy., Kahului, 877-CUPS. $

Sushi Go - Presents a concept unlike anything we’ve seen on Maui: conveyor-belt sushi! Queen Ka'ahumanu Center, Kahului, 877-8744. $

Mercado - Latino/Mexican market, with produce from Mexico, So. America, Tonga and New Zealand. Homemade tamales. Open Mon-Fri, 8 a.m.-5:30 p.m. 325 Hukilike St., Kahului, 871-5067. $

SOUTH MAUI

Da Sushi Bar - Full menu and a variety of sushi. Open 11 a.m.- 2:30 p.m. and 5-9 p.m. Fri-Sat, 5 p.m.-12 a.m. 333 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 877-4849. $$

Las Piñata’s - Fresh and wholesome Mexican food from Kitchen Sink burritos to quesadillas. Casual dining and various piñatas available. 395 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 877-8707. $

Dunes Restaurant - Adventuresome revisions of local and American breakfast, lunch and dinner favorites. Mon-Fri, 6:30 a.m.-7:30 p.m.; Sat-Sun, 6:30 a.m.-9 p.m. Maui Lani Golf Course, Kahului, 877-7461. $$

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

Sheik’s Restaurant - Local favorites including Loco Moco and Shoyu Chicken. 97 Wakea Ave., Kahului, 877-0121. $

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

Capische? - Contemporary Italian with a twist and an extensive wine list. Commanding ocean views from every table. Wailea Diamond Resort, 879-2224. $$$

Tokyo Tei - Lunch and dinner featuring teriyaki beef and fish, tempura, katsu, saimin and more. 1063 E. Lower Main St., Wailuku, 242-9630. $

Cupie’s Drive-In - Local lunch take-out. Open Mon, 9 a.m.-4 p.m.; Tue-Sat, 9 a.m.-9 p.m. 134 W. Kamehameha Ave., Kahului, 877-3055. $

Saigon Cafe - Wailuku’s hidden secret! Delicious and affordable Vietnamese cuisine with excellent service. 1792 Main, Wailuku, 243-9560. $$

Cafe Kiowai - Authentic Japanese fare according to centuries-old tradition. Casual dining in a relaxed garden setting. 5400 Makena Alanui, Maui Prince Hotel, 874-1111. $$

Tiffany’s - Featuring 103 items of local and Asian entrees, Bento boxes, noodles and fish. Featuring DJ and Karaoke. Open 10:30-2 a.m. 1424 Lower Main St. Wailuku, 249-0052. $

Wei Wei BBQ & Noodle House - Very affordable Chinese cuisine, counter-service, delicious noodle dishes. 210 Imikala St.,Wailuku, 242-7928. $

Ruby’s - Walk down memory lane at this fabulous ‘50s cafe. Old-time American dining morning to night. Queen Ka`ahumanu Center, Kahului, 248-7829. $

Blue Marlin Harbor Front Grill & Bar - Get amazing seafood, steaks, sandwiches, pizza and sushi. Eat outdoors overlooking the Ma’alaea Fishing Fleet. Ma’alaea Harbor Village, 244-8844. $$

Takamiya Market - Plate lunches, homemade corned beef, sashimi, tossed salads. Catering and banquet facility. 359 N. Market St., Wailuku, 244-3404. $

Maui Mix Plate - Traditional foods of the varied ethnic groups who call Hawai’i home. 70 Ka’ahumanu Ave, Kahului, 877-0706. $

Dragon Dragon Chinese Restaurant Excellent service and fair prices with dishes like Kung Pao Chicken, Crispy Gau Gee Mein and Honey Walnut Prawns. Maui Mall, Kahului, 893-1628. $

Bistro Molokini - Blend of California and Island cuisine, lunch and dinner. Poolside. Grand Wailea, 875-1234. $$

Alexander’s Fish & Chips - Affordable take-out seafood, chicken, ribs—all deep fried tempura style or grilled. 1913 S. Kihei Rd., 874-0788. $ Aroma D’Italia Ristorante - Southern Italian cuisine and full wine list at reasonable prices. Open Mon-Sat, 5-9 p.m. 1881 S. Kihei Rd., 879-0133. $$ BadaBing! - Home of the Rat Pack Bar. Pizzas, pastas and Italian specialties created with love and a little attitude. $10 wines and kids eat free on Monday and Saturday. Fuhgeddaboudit! 1945 S. Kihei Rd., 875-0188. $$ Beach ’n Bagels Cafe - Fresh Bagels with traditional toppings of flavored cream cheeses, smoked salmon, sandwiches, salads, smoothies and specialty coffee drinks. 2395 S. Kihei Rd., Dolphin Plaza, 875-7668. $

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

EMPLOYEE OF THE

WEEK AS TOLD TO GABRIELLE POCCIA

Tim Craft Waiter, Moose McGillyCuddy’s in Lahaina Moose’s is a constant party. You can always find someone there to get crazy with. I’ve had my party days and I still cut loose every once in a while, but now it’s more fun to watch the people in the bar get wild. I started working at Moose’s two years ago when I moved from San Francisco. I knew two of the managers so I decided to stop in and apply. I got the job and was really enjoying my life so I stayed in Maui longer and longer. Then I met a beautiful girl and I stayed even longer. I don’t see myself leaving any time soon. It can be hard to balance your need for money with your need to have fun. Moose’s really lets me have both. I have a great schedule where I get my mornings to be active and do things like kayak and then I get my evenings to relax. All the people who work at Moose’s are great. We work together and we get the job done. I wouldn’t be able to do my job as well if it weren’t for co-workers like my busser, Faye. I call her the Silver Vixen and she does a fantastic job. Things can get hectic, especially during Monday Night Football and we have to control the flow of people in order to get everyone served. Everyone helps each other out to make the job run smoothly. Even when it’s busy, it still feels laid-back. MTW

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

DININGLISTINGS Da Kitchen - Huge portions of local Hawaiian food. Plate lunches, steak plates and amazing chicken katsu. Very casual; sit and eat or get your food to go. 2439 S. Kihei Rd., 875-7782. $ Dina’s Sandwitch - Deli sandwiches, salads and hot dogs, homemade potato salad, pasta salad, healthy garden fresh salads and saimin. Open 11 a.m.-10 p.m. 145 N. Kihei Rd, 879-3262. $ Fernando’s - Authentic Mexican food. Open 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. daily. 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei, 879-9952. $ Fiesta Time - Superior Mexican taqueria. Order a la carte or combo special with the freshest ingredients. 300 Ma’alaea Rd., Ma’alaea, 244-5862. $ Horhitos Mexican Cantina - Burritos, salads, appetizers and “food for gringos,” too. Located next to Hapa’s Nightclub. Open 5 p.m. to 2 a.m. Mon.-Sat. 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei, 891-MEXI. $ Humuhumunukunukuapua’a - Hawaiian and Polynesian cuisine oceanside. Grand Wailea Resort, 875-1234 ext. 4900. $$$

Joy’s Place - “Smart eating” featuring organic foods which are low fat, low salt and wheat free. Open Mon thru Sat, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. 993 S. Kihei Rd., 879-9258. $ Keoki’s Fish ‘N Chips - Ono Fish & Chips. Open for breakfast at 7 a.m. Kukui Mall, next to Starbucks, 891-1400. $ Life’s A Beach - Food and drinks in a fun atmosphere. Nachos, burritos, prime rib and grilled mahi mahi and lunch specials. 1913 S. Kihei Rd., 891-8010. $ Longhi’s Wailea - Seafood, meat and pasta entrees with many not listed on the menu. 3750 Wailea Alanui Dr., 891-8883. $$$ Ma`alaea Grill - Reasonably priced fine dining overlooking the harbor from the Maui Ocean Center. Ma`alaea Harbor Village, 243-2206. $$ Marco’s South Side Grill - A lavish and beautiful setting complements the hearty Italian food and excellent wines. 1445 S. Kihei Rd., 874-4041. $$ Maui Tacos - Featuring tacos and burritos with chargrilled steak, chicken and seafood marinated in pineapple, lime juices and spices from the islands. 2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kamaole Beach Center, 879-5005. $

Burritos! Nachos! Salsa Bar!

Island Fish Tacos Grilled Steak, Chicken Vegetarian MAUI Lahaina Square, Lahaina • 661-8883 Kamaole Beach Center, Kihei • 879-5005 Napili Plaza, Napili • 665-0222 Kaahumanu Center, Kahului • 871-7726 BIG ISLAND Prince Kuhio Plaza, Hilo • 959-0359 OAHU Mililani Shopping Center, Mililani • 623-9405 Kailua Village Shops, Kailua • 261-4155

Nick’s Fishmarket - Fine dining in open air and elegance with amazing seafood dishes and fresh fish. Fairmont Kea Lani, Wailea, 879-7224. $$$ Pita Paradise - Good food served fast. Serving up a mean Mediterranean-style “gyro,” salads and wraps, with outdoor lanai. Kihei Kalama Village Center, 875-7679. $ Roy’s Bar & Grill - Mouth-watering Hawaiian fusion entrees in a spacious and upbeat atmosphere. Fine dining, reservations recommended. Open nightly from 5:30 to 10 p.m. Pi’ilani Shopping Center, 303 Pi’ikea Ave., Kihei, 891-1120. $$$ Sarento’s on the Beach - Contemporary dining near the water’s edge. Italian cuisine, very romantic. Private VIP table available. 2980 S. Kihei Rd., 875-7555. $$$ Shabu Shabu Toji - Healthy and delicious Japanese style fondue. Beef, pork or seafood, and veggies. Open for lunch Wed-Fri; dinner 5:30-9:30 p.m. nightly. 1280 S. Kihei Rd., 875-8366. $ Spices - Steak, seafood and more! Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. The Maui Coast Hotel, 2259 S. Kihei Rd., 891-8860. $$$

AUGUST 25, 2005

DINING

Livewire Cafe - Gourmet desserts, coffee drinks, smoothies. Open 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. Sun thru Thu; 6 a.m. to midnight Fri and Sat. 137 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-6009. $ Makawao Steak House - Classic and comfortable menu with daily fish preparations and salad bar. 3612 Baldwin Ave., Makawao, 572-8711. $$ Maui’s Best Tamales & Local Food - Authentic, fresh and tasty Mexican cuisine along with local favorites. 81 Makawao Ave., Pukalani Square, 573-2998. $ Moana Bakery & Cafe - Pacific Rim dining for vegetarians and meat eaters. Bakery provides wonderful goodies for the sweet tooth. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9999. $ Pauwela Cafe & Bakery - Healthy, low-fat deli cuisine and daily fresh baked goods. Open 7 a.m.-2:30 p.m. 375 W. Kuiaha Rd., Haiku, 575-9242. $

South Shore Tiki Lounge - Killer burgers, sausage sandwiches, mai-tais and pizza. Awesome outdoor seating on the Aloha Jungle Lanai. Open 11 a.m.-2 a.m., serving food 'till midnight! Kihei Kalama Village, 874-6444. $

Veg Out - Vegan and vegetarian food, from Mexican, Italian and Far East influences. 810 Kokomo Rd., Haiku, 575-5320. $

Sunset Mixed Grill - Local, Japanese and Chinese cuisine, along with some Korean dishes. Entrees come with two side dishes. BYOB. Open 10 a.m.-9 p.m. 2395 S. Kihei Rd. 891-1991. $

Alexander’s Fish & Chips - Seafood, chicken, ribs, deep-fried tempura style or grilled. Great food, great prices. 840 Wainee St., Lahaina Square, 667-9009. $

Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Cafe - Relaxed island luxury in ambience and cuisine, with ocean views and live music. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983. $$ Vietnamese Cuisine - Hawaiian Opakapaka filet, soft shell crab, New York steak. Open 10:30 a.m.-9:30 p.m. Azeka Place I, Kihei, 875-2088. $$ Yakiniku Steak House - Fresh and flavorful, authentic Korean food. Open 10 a.m.-10 p.m., lunch and dinner. 752 Lower Main, Wailuku, 244-7788. $

UPCOUNTRY Anthony’s Coffee Company - A full espresso bar, hot and cold sandwiches, ice cream. Make sure to stop in for a great box lunch to go! 90 Hana Hwy., Paia, 579-8340. $ Café 808 - Local diner-style serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Open daily from 6 a.m. to 8 p.m. 4566 Lower Kula Rd., Kula, 878-6874. $ Café Des Amis - Charming cafe with delicious sweet and savory crepes and Mediterranean fare. 42 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-6323. $ Cakewalk Paia Bakery - High quality baked goods, sandwiches and specialty cakes. 100 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-8770. $ Charley’s Restaurant & Saloon - Hankering for some grub? Charley’s serves it hearty and healthy from breakfast to dinner and beyond. 142 Hana Hwy., Paia, 579-9453. $ K Fresh Mint - Vietnamese vegetarian cuisine including Summer Rolls, Spicy Lemongrass Soup and Soy Fish in Clay Pot. Catering and take-out available. Open daily 11 a.m. to 9 p.m. 115 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9144. $ Hana Hou Cafe - Hawaiian homestyle cooking with aloha-filled ambience and local musicians. 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery, 575-2661. $

www.mauitacoscookbook.com Email: eatmaui@maui.net www.mauitacos.com

Kula Lodge & Restaurant - Upcountry’s familystyle restaurant with sweeping views of the island. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Haleakala Highway, 878-1535. $

Jacque’s Northshore Bistro - Tropical yet festive atmosphere, with a sushi bar, indoor and lanai dining. 120 Hana Hwy., Paia, 579-8844. $$ Kimura Saimin Shop - Casual atmosphere, simple, affordable menu with fresh ingredients done right! 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery, 575-5228. $

WEST MAUI

Athens Greek Restaurant - Affordable and authentic gyros, shish kebab, falafel and more. Ya’Sou! Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-4300. $ Ba-Le - French Vietnamese sandwiches, noodle dishes, pho, saimin and more. Wide variety of tapioca. Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-5566. $ Banyan Tree - “Eclectic Pacific cuisine with a Hawaiian twist.” Lodge atmosphere, ocean views. Ritz Carlton Kapalua, 669-6200. $$$ BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria - Deep-dish specialty pizzas and homemade Pizookies with live music nightly. Overlooking Lahaina Town with ocean view. 730 Front St., 661-0700. $ Breakwall Cafe - Serving breakfast, coffee, sandwiches, salads, smoothies. Open everyday 7 a.m.-2 p.m. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-7220. $ Cafe O’Lei - Oceanfront dining featuring light and healthy yet hearty gourmet lunch and dinner. Delicious salads and focaccia sandwiches. 839 Front St., Lahaina, 661-9491. $$ Canoes - Casual yet elegant dining serving Polynesian style steaks, and seafood. and salad bar. Lunch 11 a.m.-2:30 p.m., dinner 5-9 p.m. 1450 Front St., Lahaina, 661-0937. $$ Castaway Cafe - Beachside, serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Soups, salads, pasta. Maui Kaanapali Villas & Resort, 661-9091. $ Chez Paul Restaurant - Fine dining French cuisine, .romantic setting. Call for reservations. Open for dinner only 820 Olowalu Rd., Olowalu, 661-3843. $$$ K CJ’s Deli & Diner - Reasonably priced comfort foods like Reuben sandwiches, pot roast, freshly baked pies and more. Open daily. 2580 Keka’a Dr., Fairway Shops, Ka’anapali, 6670968. $ Comercial Mexicana Store - Authentic Mexican food, tamales, enchiladas, tacos, soups, rice and beans. Open everyday 10 a.m.-9 p.m. 840 Wainee St., Lahaina, 661-6193. $ Cool Cat Cafe - 1950s-style dinner. Delicious burgers and sandwiches, huge salads and fountain desserts. Food served 11 a.m. to 10 p.m. Wharf Cinema, Lahaina, 667-0908. $ K

DININGLISTINGS David Paul’s Lahaina Grill - Fine Pacific Rim cuisine in the intimate dining room on the ground floor of the Lahaina Inn. 127 Lahainaluna, Lahaina, 667-5117. $$$ K

Maui Tacos - Featuring tacos and burritos with chargrilled steak, chicken and seafood marinated in pineapple, lime juices and spices from the islands. Lahaina Square, 661-8883; Napili Square, 665-0222. $

Sports Club Kahana Grill - Upscale, healthy restaurant inside Sports Club Kahana. Breakfast, lunch and take-out. 4327 Lwr. Honoapi`ilani Rd., Kahana, 669-3539. $$

Feast At Lele - A royal tour of the cuisine of Polynesia sharing the spotlight with music and dance from four Pacific Islands. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 667-5353. $$$

Moose McGillycuddy’s - Great value, large portions, all-you-can-eat specials, merry atmosphere and a large bar. 844 Front St., Lahaina, 667-7758. $

Swan Court - One of the top 10 romantic restaurants in the world, with an extensive list of contemporary fine wines. Hyatt Regency, Ka’anapali, 667-4727. $$$

Gaby’s Pizzeria - Casual Italian dining with pizza and pasta from $6-$25. Open 11 a.m. to 12 a.m. daily. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8112. $

Nachos Grande - Fresh Mexican food, fast. Vegetarian, too. Honokowai Marketplace, 662-0890. $

Thai Chef - Thai food like you’ve never had it, with curry, Pad Thai, summer rolls and more. Veggie dishes available Old Lahaina Center, 667-2814. $

Gerard’s - Fine French dining in downtown Lahaina. Rich, flavorful yet light foods await your taste buds. 174 Lahainaluna, Lahaina, 6618939. $$$

Okazuya Deli - Quality Japanese plate lunch. The best lemon caper mahi mahi and Okinawan potato tempura ever! Open 10 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. and 4:30 - 9 p.m. 3600 Lower Honoapiilani Hwy., Honokowai, 665-0512. $

Hard Rock Cafe - Good American food at decent prices amongst rock ‘n roll memorabilia. 900 Front St., Lahaina, 667-7400. $ Hecocks - Italian restaurant and cocktail lounge oceanside. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8810. $$ K Hula Grill - Barefoot bar and beachside dining, 1940s-style. Menu is a seafood lover’s delight. Whaler’s Village, Ka’anapali, 667-6636. $$ Island Taco - The best soft shell tacos ever! Beef, fish, pork or chicken, served with black beans, fresh cabbage, cheese, onions and jalapenos. Open very late night, next to Paradice Bluz. 744 Luakini St., Lahaina. $ Jonny’s Burger Joint - Great burgers, as well as Mexican food, salads and fried items, served until midnight, with bar and pool table. 2395 Honoapi’ilani Hwy., Ka’anapali, 661-4500. $ Kimo’s - Fresh fish, prime rib and their famous Hula Pie, oceanside dining. Live entertainment daily. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4811. $$ Lahaina Coolers - Off the beaten path surf bistro. Good food, good quality, late night menu. 80 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 661-7082. $ Leilani’s On The Beach - Relaxed beachfront dining, specializing in fresh seafood and Pacific Rim cuisine. 2435 Ka’anapali Pkwy., 661-4495. $$

Outback Steak House - Quality steaks, shrimp-onthe-barbie, and the Bloomin’ Onion in a casual and lively atmosphere. Open 4-10 p.m. nightly. 4405 Honoapi’ilani Hwy., Kahana, 665-1822. $$ Penne Pasta - Mark Ellman’s inexpensive Italian bistro with homestyle pasta, pizza and salads. 180 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 661-6633. $

Vino Italian Tapas & Wine Bar - Comfort and contemporary cuisine featuring fresh pasta and an extensive wine list. Open for dinner nightly 6 p.m Village Course Clubhouse, Kapalua, 661-8466. $$$

For corrections or to get your listing in this section, please fax 661-0446

I s l a n d Ta c o Fresh Fish Chicken or Pork Tacos Catering Available NEW SUMMER HOURS Mon.-Sat. 11am-2pm & 9pm-3am Sun. Sunset-2am

LOCATED AT PARADICE BLUZ ON FRONT STREET

Pioneer Inn - Breakfast, lunch and dinner daily, with live entertainment nightly. 659 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-3636. $ Pizza Paradiso - Award-winning pasta dishes, toss-to-order salads, big fat Greek gyros, homemade tiramisu and panna cotta. Honokowai Marketplace, 667-2929. $ Quizno’s Subs - Toasted subs, 100% dairy-made ingredients. Open Mon-Sat, 11 a.m.-9 p.m., Sun, 12-8 p.m. 170 Papalaua Street, Lahaina Mall, 667-5111. $ Ramon’s Cantina - Traditional Mexican food. Happy hour 2-6 p.m. and 10 p.m. to close with $2 tacos and half-off appetizers. Serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Open 8 a.m.-2 .a.m. 658 Front St., Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 6670845. $ Rusty Harpoon Restaurant & Tavern - Quench thirst, satiate hunger and watch sports. Large parties welcome. Whalers Village, Ka’anapali, 661-3123. $$

Longhi’s - Elegant fine dining, freshest ingredients, pasta, seafood and steaks. 888 Front St., Lahaina, 667-2288. $$$

Sansei Seafood Restaurant & Sushi Bar - D.K. Kodama has combined the highest quality sushi bar infused with Hawai’i’s cultural flavors. 115 Bay Dr., Kapalua, 669-6286. $$ K

Mama’s Ribs & Rotisserie - Serving ribs and roasted chicken, BBQ baked beans, coleslaw and macaroni salad. Napili Plaza, 665-6262. $

Smoke House - Delicious barbeque, ribs, chicken, sandwiches and hamburgers, along with a full bar. Open 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m. 927 Wainee St., Lahaina, 667-7005. $

Not to be used with any other coupons or discounts. Coupon has no cash value. Coupon expires 8-31-05

LETTERS

NEWS

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SURF

DINING

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A&E

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DA KINE CALENDAR

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

15% O FF S USHI O W N N

AUGUST 25, 2005

EDNESDAY

DINING

IGHT

The Brazilian Girls Thursday, at Casanova; Friday-Saturday, at Hapa’s [MUSIC/DANCE] The Brazilian Girls have a reputation for being sexy, maybe because they have sex on their minds and their set list. The New York based band have an original sound that ignites a sort of fire in their listeners, and according to the stories their fans have been known to get a little wild during any given performance. The Brazilian

Girls music could be described as new wave disco, innovating traditional techno sounds with instrumental breaks and sensual lyrics. A group completely different than what Maui may be used to, TBG is dance music for the sex fetishist with a taste for jazz. The group has already produced several albums on Verve Forecast record company and will be performing all along the West Coast after leaving Maui. The Brazilian Girls’ four members originate from the U.S., Europe, and South America. Vocalist Sabina Scuibba sings in German, Spanish, English, French and Italian, while the keyboardist, Didi Gutman, provides the main melody. Bassist Jesse Murphy and drummer Aaron Johnston both keep a mean beat. The Brazilian Girls are true to big city experimentation and have created an original work of art. It’s a little bite of the Big Apple just for us islanders. Get your tickets at the door or in advance at HulaTickets.com and at Paia Wine Corner, Casanova’s Deli, Hapa’s Kihei, Beach Road Records Kihei, Live Wire Cafe Front St. Lahaina, Requests Wailuku, and the new Enchantress Boutique in the Shops at Wailea. [GABRIELLE POCCIA]

SEND YOUR LISTINGS & PHOTOS FOR DA KINE CALENDAR TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM OR FAX (808) 661-0446 LETTERS

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

ThIS WEEK’S PICKS by Samantha Campos

Steel Pulse Saturday, 4 p.m. at the A&B Amphitheater

Beyond Treason Friday, 7 p.m. at Maui Community College, Ka Lama 103 [FILM] Our public officials have asked that Americans “support our troops,” but most probably have no idea the havoc our own government has wrecked upon our servicemen and women. The new 89-minute documentary Beyond Treason shows in explicit, nauseating detail the chemical, biological and nuclear experiments the U.S. government has conducted on our troops. While much of the movie focuses on the myriad causes of Gulf War Syndrome, which has already killed thousands— exposure to untested vaccines is high on the list— Beyond Treason also explores the marching of soldiers into nuclear bomb test sites and use of “nonvolunteer” soldiers in CIA-sponsored tests involving LSD. The film is free, but only to the general public. [ANTHONY PIGNATARO]

THURSDAY

[MUSIC] As of late, there has been a constant buzz about this world-renowned reggae sensation. Everybody knows that Steel Pulse have a unique and lively sound and they put on an amazing show that not only entertains, but also enlightens. They have committed themselves to educating the masses through their music, so be prepared to break a mental sweat and well as a physical one. The group has been touring together for years and has left in their wake many dedicated fans. You all will be scrambling for tickets to their show this weekend so you’d better get on it if you want to be schooled and entertained all at once. Also features Wailing Souls, Ooklah the Moc and Cool Rush. Tickets: $32/37. Call 242-SHOW. [HEIDI KING]

➤➤➤➤➤FRIDAY ➤➤➤➤➤SATURDAY ➤➤➤➤➤SUN

THURSDAY, AUGUST 25TH

FRIDAY, AUGUST 26TH & SATURDAY, AUGUST 27TH

(NY CITY)

Andy Bumatai

BRAZILIAN GIRLS

and Mel Cabang

AQUA BOOGIE

Malino

MAUI BUILT

Buti Groove

Bud Light Presents

natural vibes

Portfolio Nite Dress to Impress

AUGUST 25, 2005

DA KINE CALENDAR

TICKETS: AT HAPA’S or hulatickets.com

TEEN NIGHT

Grammy Nominee

Willie K

ULTRA FAB I HAVE A DREAM

SIN

PARTY!

The Truth of Falsetto Saturday, 7 p.m. at The Ritz-Carlton Kapalua [MUSIC/CULTURAL] Falsetto describes an art form in which the male voice sings a high-pitched song of Hawaiian culture. This gender distinction traces back to the old, conservative roots of falsetto in a time when women weren’t allowed to sing in public. Thanks to the preservation of this tradition, falsetto still exists today as an extraordinary breed of music. Whereas in modern music we usually see females procure the highest notes, falsetto brings men to the stage who attain these elusive heights of the musical scale. Sound interesting? Aloha Festivals is throwing a contest for these brave souls of sound at The RitzCarlton, Kapalua’s Salon Ballroom on August 27th at 7 p.m. The 10 male contestants will be accompanied by instrumentals and guitar as they strive for high keys and a recording deal with Hula Records as well as other prizes. This event synthesizes modern, local talent with an artistic relic of music and culture. When was the last time you heard guys attempt the same notes as Mariah Carey without needing to bury your head in the sand? [MOLLY RETTIG]

DAY

Yes Wednesday, 5 & 7:30 p.m. at the Castle Theater [FILM] Yes is a romantic drama about a passionate love affair between an American woman and a Middle-Eastern man. But the film covers more than l’amour as it travels from London and Belfast to Beirut and Havana—issues of religion, politics and sexuality are also examined. Even before seeing the film, though, its bold title sends an emotional statement with connotations that will differ for us all. And so, in order to look deeper into the word “yes,” I consulted the thesaurus. Consider it a study in semantics. First in line is the term “all right,” which could be construed as slightly submissive. For example, “Could you do me this favor?”—All right is breathed out with a sigh. Next listed is “okay,” which implies more of an excited response, as in, “Hey, want to get dressed super cute and go out dancing?”—Okay! followed by the scurrying to get ready. Then there’s “sure,” a response that holds hesitation in its four letters. Like, “Do you want to see something disturbing?”—Long pause, then slowly, dubious Ssuurree. Throwing caution to the wind is “why not?” This one’s too easy. “Would you like another drink, miss?”— Why not? bubbles out loudly with laughter. Getting down to business, we have “No problem.” For example, “Could you have that article finished in an hour?”—Quick and confident response, No problem as the fingers pound faster on the keys. There’s so many more but last on the list is “fair enough.” This is the response for when you don’t have a choice and you aren’t excited with the bargain being made. “Well, you I drove last night so that you could drink, now it’s your turn.”—“Fair enough” comes out calmly right before the cursing under one’s breath. Now, with all these other options, when does “yes” get used? You know, like, “Oh God!! Yes! YES! YES!!” Well, when you win the lottery, of course! What were YOU thinking? But really, just go see the film. [HEIDI KING]

➤➤➤➤➤MONDAY ➤➤➤➤➤TUESDAY ➤➤➤➤➤WEDNESDAY

JENNIFER JOHNS from Oakland California

Innovative, Driven, Compassionate and Powerful

In the heart of Olde Makawao Town Sat. Aug 27th Offical After Show Party: “Reggae on the Valley”

PANA’EWA & SUDDEN RUSH MARTY DREAD & BONAFIDE with Special Guests Summer time is Reggae time! Music starts @ 9:45 pm $ 15 Cover

FRIDAY SEPTEMBER 2ND

WILD WAHINE WEDNESDAY with DJ BLAST

Casanova’s Famous Ladies Night The evening that earned Casanova the award

SHOW STARTS @ 10PM

“Best Late Night In Maui” 9:45 pm 5 Cover

Friday Aug. 26th

BAD 80’s DANCE PARTY

$12 COVER

Thurs. Aug 25th

Micheal Jacksons BRAZILIAN and Madonnas GIRLS come in free Two shows Thursday Music starts @ 9:45 pm $ 5 Cover

Tickets on sale now!

In the heart of Olde Makawao Town

Make it a memorable evening. Dine and dance at Casanova. For dinner reservations call 572-0220 www.casanovamaui.com

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

Make it a memorable evening. Dine and dance at Casanova. For dinner reservations call 572-0220 www.casanovamaui.com

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

FILMCRITIQUE

BY COLE SMITHEY

Troubled Fairy Tale Terry Gilliam’s career stays immured Terry Gilliam’s (Brazil) much anticipated narrative effort, after his famously doomed attempt at adapting Don Quixote for the big screen, is a visually impressive but viscerally blank movie thanks to Ehren Kruger’s (The Skeleton Key) irksome script. Without concern for veracity about the celebrated authors of such fairytale classics as Cinderella and Rapunzel, Kruger weaves a loose canvas where he paints the erudite

The Brothers Grimm

★★★★★ Rated PG-13/118 mins.

brothers as fictional nineteenth-century opportunists who make their money fooling German villages into believing in bogus monsters that only they can be hired to “exorcise.” The gypsy brothers, cynical Will (Matt Damon) and gullible Jacob (Heath Ledger), are found out and captured by French authorities who assign them to dispel the mystery behind the disappearance of young maidens in the village of Marbaden near an enchanted forest. Audiences other than preteens will be sorely disappointed at

Gilliam’s over-massaged vision of a tediously gimmicky script. Grime flies onto Ledger’s and Damon’s eraperfect costumes in rainy opening scenes that foreshadow the opaqueness of their silly cartoonish characters. With a page torn from a Hardy Boys story the Grimm brothers perform a barnenclosed exorcism that employs the use of a manned monster that swings from a contraption of pulleys to convince the barn’s owner that he has spent his town’s money wisely. The sequence gives the movie a false start and predisposes the audience away from accepting the fairytale aspects of the story that compete with hollow comic tones toward an unrewarding climax. Jonathan Pryce (The Affair Of The Necklace) is mechanically villainous as Delatombe a commanding member of Napoleon’s Army overseeing a bumbling torturer named Cavaldi (Peter Stormare—Fargo). The Army suspects the brothers for the disappearance of numerous girls from Marbaden and gives the brothers a death-wish opportunity to prove their innocence by solving the mystery. Will and Jacob are left to convince Angelika (Lena Headey—Possession), a local huntress, to guide them through the thick forest for clues. A mausoleum-like tower in the middle of the for-

A TOM MOFFATT PRODUCTION

DAVID SANBORN THURSDAY SEPTEMBER 1 7:30PM

Nice hat

RESERVED TICKETS $45, $35, $25

TICKETS AVAILABLE AT

MACC BOX OFFICE CASTLE THEATER

AUGUST 25, 2005

FILM

808-242-SHOW

est shifts the movie into a too-little-too-late spree of Grimm Brothers’ fairytale iconography. Owned by a murderous king and his “Mirror Queen,” the impenetrable tower holds the answer for the brothers to reverse the Queen’s spell and make the area safe for young girls. Gilliam takes obvious joy in scenes involving a catapult device that sends Jacob flying through the air and inside the tower where he gets more than an eye full of Monica Bellucci’s ancient queen. The scene is reminiscent of the closing moments of The Skeleton Key and attracts an uncomfortable comparison between the two concurrently running movies written by Ehren Kruger. The Brothers Grimm fails on three essential points; it doesn’t fulfill its title’s promise of

teaching something about the actual Grimm Brothers, it comes nowhere close to achieving the clarity of any of the Brothers Grimm’s brilliant allegorical stories and, lastly, it tarnishes Gilliam’s already sketchy career. Monica Bellucci steals the movie as The Mirror Queen, a 500 year-old immortal ruler intent on attaining eternal beauty by way of a magical curse requiring the lives of 12 young maidens. Damon’s morphing sideburns and eyebrows carry on their own surreal subplot while Ledger diligently attempts to singlehandedly carry a children’s movie with a 60 million dollar budget. Gilliam and his adoring audiences would have been better off if he had just directed a faithful version of Hansel And Gretel. MTW

SHOWTIMES

MOVIECAPSULES

MAUI FILM FESTIVAL

MAUI FILM FESTIVAL’S CANDLELIGHT CINEMA WEDNESDAY, August 31

Castle Theater, 572-3456 Yes - R - Wed 5 & 7:30pm

MAUI MALL MEGAPLEX

YES 5 & 7:30 PM, CASTLE THEATER Multiple Academy Award nominee Joan Allen stars in this romantic drama that travels from London and Belfast to Beirut and Havana, about a passionate love affair between an American woman and a Middle-Eastern man in which they confront some of the greatest conflicts of our generation—religious, political and sexual. "Bold, Vibrant and Impassioned" (LA TImes). "Alive and Daring," raved Roger Ebert. "Buzzes with Visual Life and Imagination" (salon.com). Directed by Sally Potter (The Tango Lesson). Rated R. 95 min.

New This Week THE BROTHERS GRIMM - (PG13) - ActionAdventure, Fantasy - My friend complained to me that our movie capsules are too cynical all the time. So this is me trying to be more positive: Matt Damon and Heath Ledger play brothers that fight fake evil in the 1800s. When their scam is discovered, they are forced to go up against real evil. It can’t be too scary because it’s only rated PG13. But, I’m sure there will be scenes for us ladies to salivate over and witty lines to keep the public entertained. There—was that upbeat enough? 118 min. (Heidi King) THE CAVE - (PG13) - Action, Horror - Two scientists and their team of top-notch divers make an incredible and mysterious discovery. Somewhere in the Romanian forest the group finds the ruins of an old abbey. But this is no ordinary abbey. Underneath the building lies the entrance into an extensive cave system. Eager to be the first to discover the caves and possibly a new species, the team enter without the slightest idea of the danger that lies within. And carnage ensues. Evil, growing and breeding, hidden underneath the house of God… what a metaphor. 97 min. (Gabrielle Poccia) UNDISCOVERED - (PG13) - Romantic Comedy The title has a double meaning. First, it refers to the struggle of new hopefuls breaking into show biz, while at the same time pointing there’s a lot to learn about the world when you’re young and stupid. The main young and stupid role is a model living in New York who falls in love with a musician. She eventually ventures to Los Angeles to give acting a shot, and again meets up with her old musician flame, who’s not having any luck breaking into rockstar status. Then model-girl and her new friend (Ashlee Simpson) decide to help him out. But the fame and pressure soon begin to take their toll, as they learn that it’s not all fun, games and uppers. Starring several new actors, this movie is guaranteed to showcase Ashlee’s yet undiscovered abilities, lip-syncing on the silver screen. 97 min. (GP)

Now Showing CHARLIE AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY - (PG) - Family, Musical, Fantasy - This Tim Burton adaptation of Roald Dahl’s rather dark and brutal children’s book stars Johnny Depp as famed chocolate magnate Willy Wonka. Yes, I know Depp and Burton do great work. And that Helena Bonham Carter also appears. But come on! Must Hollywood remake every film? Gene Wilder played the definitive Willy Wonka back in 1971! Give me a break! 106 min. (Anthony Pignataro) DEUCE BIGALOW: EUROPEAN GIGOLO - (R) - Comedy - So they had to go there again? Why? Well, Deuce (Rob Schneider) is back to his gigolo self, only this time he’s in Europe, and his former pimp TJ (Eddie Griffin) is implicated in the murders of Europe’s greatest gigolos. So Deuce, being the guy that he is, goes there to work (ha!) in order to clear his good friend’s name. But, of course, on the way he must compete against the powerful European Union of prostidudes—?!—and court a bunch of abnormal female clients including the beautiful Eva, who suffers from acute obessivecompulsive disorder. 83 min. (Kimberly L. Welch) THE DUKES OF HAZZARD - (PG13) Comedy, Action - Yeehaw! The famous orange car is back with sexy bad boys Johnny Knoxville playing Luke Duke and Sean William Scott as Bo Duke. Don’t forget their hot cousin Daisy Duke, this time played by a toned, tan and oiled-up Jessica Simpson in Daisy’s infamous tiny cutoffs. It’s gonna be a ho-down and a hootenanny set in present day. I bet we all try to jump in our cars through the windows after this. And I give

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

This is a movie about a skateboarding dog... props to anyone who succeeds. FYI, convertibles don’t count. 106 min. (HK) 40 YEAR OLD VIRGIN - (R) - Comedy - This is one of those pictures in which the title pretty much tells you everything you need to know. Steve Carell, The Daily Show’s funniest correspondent, stars in this twist on the old, well-told story of the guy whose friends attempt to help into the sack. If this works, it’ll be because Carell is his usually hilarious self and the producers didn’t puss out and try to make this a PG-13 flick. 116 min. (AP) FOUR BROTHERS - (R) - Drama/Crime - So here we are with four adopted brothers, who come together to bury the woman who raised them. But at the funeral, they discover that their mother may have been murdered and they want revenge. Wouldn’t any son? But did I mention that yummy Mark Wahlberg is one of the brothers? Mmm... 109 min. (KLW) THE GREAT RAID - (R) - Action/Adventure - It’s 1945 in the Philippines, and this is the true story of the 6th Ranger Battalion, under the command of Lieutenant Colonel Henry Mucci (Benjamin Bratt—ooh la la!), who undertake a daring rescue mission against all odds. Traveling 30 miles behind enemy lines, the 6th Ranger Battalion aims to liberate over 500 American prisonersof-war from the notorious Cabanatuan Japanese POW camp in the most audacious rescue ever. Thank goodness for the brave ones. 132 min. (KLW) HOWL’S MOVING CASTLE - (PG) - Animation - This is an anime film by Hayao Miyazaki, director of the Academy Award-winning Spirited Away. It’s already won three international Best Film awards. It involves a young woman who heads off to the land of wizards and witches—no, not our nation’s capital—in hopes of reversing some curse cast on her by the Witch of the Waste. I think I went out with her once. Anyway, it includes the voices of Lauren Bacall, Billy Crystal, Christian Bale and Jean Simmons. 118 min. (AP) HUSTLE AND FLOW - (R) - Drama - DJay is a Memphis pimp, talented with words but lives a deadend life. Fate helps him out when he runs into an old friend, Key, who is a sound engineer and is itching to make it in the music industry. The two team up together with a church musician who supplies a beat machine. Watch DJay’s transformation as he spits out freestyle raps and heads to Memphis, hometown of the famous rapper Skinny Black. 114 min. (Linda Gampert) MARCH OF THE PENGUINS - (G) - This little documentary is going to make you laugh and cry. It’s amazing how easy it is to relate to the flightless birds. Aren’t they the only animals that mate for life? It seems to me they’re more faithful than humans. (I’m not bitter!) It’s adorable. It’s real. It’s narrated by Morgan Freeman. It follows a flock for one year, and more specifically one couple, to see how they travel across the Antarctic. 84 min. (HK) MR. & MRS SMITH - (PG13) - Action/Adventure, Romance, Thriller - Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie star in this movie that brings domestic abuse to the big screen. Secret assassins they are and now their next targets are each other! Mr. and Mrs. Smith chase each other around with guns, shout out some cheesy lines and then fire off another round. If they loved each other they could just call it quits but this is one messed up case of “I do.” People will go to this movie to see the hotness of Angelina and Brad or maybe for some reassurance in their marriage. 116 min. (LG)

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

MUST LOVE DOGS - (PG13) - Romantic Comedy Diane Lane plays a divorced woman looking to meet a new man. Her friend, played by Elizabeth Perkins, tries to help by putting her profile on one of the match-making websites. Of course, she’s pretty so she gets tons of responses. And let the dating mishaps begin. Enter John Cusack, everyone’s favorite lovesick male, and gee, I wonder how it works out. Let me guess... Is Cupid afoot? Because, I sense a pair about to fall in love, and everyone shall live happily ever after. I hate you Hollywood. I hate you and your dirty misleading misrepresentations of “romance” in the real world. 88 min. (HK) RED EYE - (PG13) - Thriller - There’s nothing worse than sitting next to some goon on a long flight at midnight. Either they’re chatty or smelly or they fall asleep drooling on your shoulder. Well, imagine Lisa’s (Rachel McAdams, The Notebook) surprise when handsome Jackson (Cillian Murphy, Batman Begins) with the big baby blues sits next to her. But don’t worry, dude turns out to be more creepy-scary than sexy as he tells her his plans to assassinate some important political figure on board—and if she tries to stop him, he’ll kill her father, too. Geez... Hey, stewardess! Oh, flight attendant? Sorry. Uh, could you please seat me next to the drooly guy? Yeah, thanks. 85 min. (Samantha Campos) SKELETON KEY - (PG13) - Horror - In the dark backwoods just outside of New Orleans, Caroline (Kate Hudson,) a live-in nurse is hired to care for an elderly woman's (Gene Rowlands) ailing husband (John Hurt) in their home—a foreboding and decrepit mansion in the Louisiana delta. Intrigued—or nosy, whatever you wanna call it—by the enigmatic couple and their rambling house, Caroline uses the skeleton key they gave her to go where she, of course, shouldn’t go and stumbles upon a dark and deadly secret in the attic. Eek! Hope she didn’t find my yearbook photo. 104 min. (KLW) STEALTH - (PG13) - Action, Adventure, Drama - Three attractive young fighter jet pilots are concerned when their superior adds another fighter jet to the team. The difference is, this jet is its own pilot. In flight, lightning strikes and hits the artificially intelligent jet. (Oh, I didn’t see that coming.) The fighter jet then becomes aware of itself and wants to kill people. Maybe I’m just in a bad mood, but haven’t we already seen this movie before? i.e. A Space Odyssey 2001, Maximum Overdrive, I Robot—you get the idea. 121 min. (HK)

Maui Mall, 249-2222 (Showtimes) = Matinee Brothers Grimm - PG13 - Fr, M-W (1:20, 4:10), 7, 9:45, Sa-Su (1:20), 4:10, 7, 9:45 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - PG - Th (1, 3:45), 6:30, Fr, M-W (1, 3:45), Sa-Su (1), 3:45 Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo - R - Th (1:15, 1:45, 3:15, 3:50, 5:25), 6:50, 7:45, 9:15, 10, Fr, MW (1:15, 1:50, 3:15, 5:25), 7:15, 7:40, 9:55, Sa-Su (1:15, 1:50, 3:15), 5:25, 7:15, 7:40, 9:55 Dukes of Hazzard - PG13 - Th (2, 4:30), 6:55, 9:40, Fr, M-W (1:55, 4:25), 6:55, 9:25, Sa-Su (1:55), 4:25, 6:55, 9:25 40 Year Old Virgin - R - Th-Fr, M-W (1:40, 4:20), 7:10, 9:50, Sa-Su (1:40), 4:20, 7:10, 9:50 Howl’s Moving Castle - PG - Th (1:30, 4:15), 7, 9:35, Fr, M-W, (1:30, 4:15), 6:50, 9:30, Sa-Su (1:30), 4:15, 6:50, 9:30 Hustle and Flow - R - Th only 9:10 March of the Penguins - G - Th (1:10, 3:15, 5:15), 7:20, 9:35, Fr, M-W (1:05, 3:05, 5:05), 7:05, 9:15, Sa-Su (1:05, 3:05), 5:05, 7:05, 9:15 Mr. & Mrs. Smith - PG13 - Th (1:25), 6:45, Fr, MW (4:30), 9:35, Sa-Su 4:30, 9:35 Skeleton Key - PG13 - Th (1:10, 1:50, 4:10, 4:40), 6:40, 7:15, 9:20, 9:45, Fr, M-W (2, 4:40), 6:30, 7:15, 9:10, 9:40, Sa-Su (2), 4:40, 6:30, 7:15, 9:10, 9:40 Stealth - PG13 - Th only (4:05), 9:25 Supercross - PG13 - Th (1, 3:10, 5:20), 7:40, 9:50, Fr, M-W (1, 3:10, 5:20), 7:35, 9:45, Sa-Su (1, 3:10), 5:20, 7:35, 9:45 Undiscovered - PG13 - Fr, M-W (1:10, 3:20, 5:30), 7:45, 10, Sa-Su (1:10, 3:20), 5:30, 7:45, 10 Valiant - G - Th (1:20, 3:20, 5:20), 7:20, 9:30, Fr, MW (1:25, 3:25, 5:25), 7:20, 9:20, Sa-Su (1:25, 3:25), 5:25, 7:20, 9:20

KA’AHUMANU 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center, 875-4910 Cave - PG13 - Fr-W (1, 3:15), 5:30, 7:45, 10 Four Brothers - R - Daily (12:25, 2:45), 5:10, 7:40, 10:05 Great Raid - R - Daily (1), 4:05, 7:05, 9:55 Must Love Dogs - PG13 - Th only (1, 3:15), 5:30, 7:45, 10 Red Eye -PG13 - Daily (12:35, 2:45), 5, 7:15, 9:30 Sky High - PG - Daily (12:30, 3), 5:15, 7:30, 9:45 Wedding Crashers - R - Daily (12:45), 4:45, 7:25, 10

KUKUI MALL 1819 South Kihei Road, 875-4910 Brothers Grimm - PG13 - Fr-Sa (1:30), 4:45, 7:30, 9:50, Su-W (1:30), 4:45, 8 Deuce Bigalow - R - Th only (1:45), 5, 7:45 Dukes of Hazzard - PG13 - Th (1:30), 4:45, 7:30, FrSa (1:45), 5, 7:45, 10, Su-W (1:45), 5, 8:15 40 Year Old Virgin - R - Th (1:15), 4:30, 7:15, Fr-Sa (1:15), 4:30, 7:15, 9:45, Su-W (1:15), 4:30, 7:45 Wedding Crashers - R - Th (1), 4:15, 7, Fr-Sa (1), 4:15, 7, 9:30, Su-W (1), 4:15, 7:30

FRONT STREET THEATRE 900 Front St., Lahaina, 249-2222 Brothers Grimm - PG13 - Fr, M-W (4), 7:15, 9:55, Sa-Su (1), 4, 7:15, 9:55 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - PG - Th 7:15, Fr, M-W (4:20), Sa-Su (1:30), 4:20 Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo - R - Th (4:45), 7:30, 9:30, Fr-W 7:30, 9:30 Dukes of Hazzard - PG13 - Th only (4), 9:50 40 Year Old Virgin - R - Th-Fr, M-W (4:15), 7, 9:45, Sa-Su (1:15), 4:15, 7, 9:45 Skeleton Key - PG13 - Th (4:30), 7:20, 10, Fr, M-W (4:30), 7:20, Sa-Su (2), 4:30, 7:20 Wedding Crashers - R - Daily 10

WHARF CINEMA CENTER 658 Front St., Lahaina, 249-2222 Four Brothers - R - Th (1:30, 4), 7:30, 9:55, Fr, MW (1, 4), 6:45, 9:15, Sa-Su (10:30, 1), 4, 6:45, 9:15 Red Eye - R - Th (1:45, 4:30), 7, 9:15, Fr, M-W (1:30, 4:30), 7:15, 9:30, Sa-Su (11:15, 1:30), 4:30, 7:15, 9:30 Undiscovered - PG13 - Fr, M-W (1:15, 4:15), 7, 9:30, Sa-Su (11, 1:15), 4:15, 7, 9:30 Wedding Crashers - R - Th only (1:15, 4:15), 7:15, 9:50

SUPERCROSS - (PG) - Action - Gag me. Okay, two brothers race dirt bikes. Lemme guess: At first, they’re going to be super close. Then they’ll run into some hardships. I’m guessing a girl might be involved in the demise of their relationship. They’ll become rivals. Hmm.. I also think one or the other will face a physical challenge with some crash or something. Yeah, then in the end, one or both of them will win the Big Race, their brotherhood will be restored and they probably both “get the girl.” There—I just saved you $10. You’re welcome. 92 min. (HK) VALIANT - (G) - Animation, Family - Okay, so it’s a Walt Disney film about patriotic carrier pigeons during World War II. Got it. 109 min. (SC) WEDDING CRASHERS - (R) - Comedy - Owen Wilson and Vince Vaughn play a couple divorce counselors who cruise weddings looking to score with chicks. But then one of them—does it really matter which?—actually falls in love with the daughter of some strange politician played by Christopher Walken. Then all hell breaks loose. 119 min. (AP)

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

Special Appearances by H. H. The Dalai Lama

WED., AUG 31 *with MFF passport (5 films-$40)-single tickets Phone: 572-3456 www.mauifilmfestival.com

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

C Y N m o fr

41 E. Lipoa Street, Lipoa Center, Kihei, 879-9001

friday turday august 26th sa gust 27th

1188 Makawao Ave., 572-0220

thursday august 25th

Tickets onsale at HulaTickets.com, Hapas Kihei (879.9001), Paia Wine Corner, Beach Road Records Kihei, The New Enchantress Boutique (Shops at Wailea), Live Wire Cafe' Front St. Lahaina, Requests Music Wailuku and Casanova’s Deli.

s! two show 9:15 pm & 12:00am

YOU ARE CORDIALLY INVITED TO CELEBRATE OUR

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AUGUST 25, 2005

DAY&NIGHT

BOOKREVIEW

BY ERIC PAUL SHAFFER

Truth and False Confessions Paul Wood’s False Confessions: A Life in Hawai’i

False Confessions: A Life in Hawai’i By Paul Wood, Flying Rabbit Press, 2002, $14.95 Paul’s “Life in Hawai’i” is lived right here on Maui. For all of us here, at least three of the pieces in False Confessions ought to be required reading. If you can read the opening line of “The Magic Crayon and the Force Angelic” and stop, you are a better dodo than I. Check it: “I don’t know which children’s story ruined your life, but I can tell you exactly which one screwed up mine.” Read on, MacDuff. I’ve never read a more amusing account of the Creation story than Paul’s “Seventeen-Foot Python Skin Found on Maui.” Read the Authorized version and Paul’s, and discover which one has you paralyzed with laughter first. Don’t worry about the other one; blame it on the translation. Paul postulates this scene: “When God created living creatures, He dealt out their qualities just as though it was a poker game… Nobody gets ALL the cards... They huddle around, study the cards, ask for a

couple more. Negotiate. That’s the deal.” Well, for all of the animals, the deal is slightly raw. “One of the chickens holds up a card that says ‘Brain the size of a peanut,’” even as he tries to hide the card that reads, “Tastes like chicken.” Bummer. Worse is yet to come. Says one, “Look, we’ve got a ‘feathers’ card—but where’s the ‘flying’ card?” Unh. Not good. Makes you wonder about the cards we humans were dealt, huh? “No claws, no tail, no armor. We don’t even have hair. We’re practically bald!” complain our forebears, and as He is reputed to do, God takes pity on us. He gives us more cards, which unfortunately turn out to be “The ‘suicidal tendencies” card. And the ‘whiners’ card.” Ooh, that stings, but that’s us, all right. I love Paul Wood’s imagination: he sees everything clearly with it, and he shows no mercy. The vanity in humanity is boundless, and Paul, at least, plumbs its depths with his pen, with spectacularly humbling and humorous results. On the other hand, if you don’t weep over the piece about the death of Paul’s dog, “The Unoffending Death of a Kind and Simple Beast,” turn in your badge and hand over your mask because you’re not human. You may think you’re alive, but that’s just a castanet of coprolites clicking in your chest. Losing man’s best friend is high on the list of life’s most painful experiences, but Paul reminds us why loving what we’re sure to outlive is worth everything. His dog, he says in a statement most apt, “emitted happiness like a gas.” That’s why we love dogs, in spite of the other gases. He also describes death in an utterly new way that nearly stops your heart: “The rest of life moves in and takes over your spot. Like the water of the sea closing in over a thrown rock.” This book is full of shocking revelations, points on rainbow-feathered shafts that pass

through you and leave a blast of magic in your mind. Anticipate these lines in your exploration: “A bicycle is a shitless horse.” And “For today the sun is burning like a brand-new copper pan, and the sky is just as big as it ever gets, most generously blue and puffy-white.” And “I like weather because it makes you remember to look up.” And “Anything as flashy and fast as lightning is bound to result

in a feeling of disappointment.” Yeah, that’s exactly what I mean. If you’re like me, you must know immediately not only what made somebody say that, but how something made somebody say that. Every sentence sparkles. Pick a card. Any card. Okay, that one says, “Big brain.” Wait, where’s your “Intelligence” card? No more? Ah, humanity. MTW

ISLAND-WIDE

Paul Wood, no matter what the title of his excellent book says, tells the truth. He tells the truth as it appears to waking human eyes and to the mind’s eye that discerns the difference between what is and what ain’t. His childlike innocence and honesty are disarming and delightful, and he has one wicked sense of humor, “wicked” in the sense we meant when we were kids. And that’s how he makes you think. Like a kid, all fresh-eyed and openminded and stuff.

FREE KAANAPALI KIHEIPAIA MAKAWAO HAIKU HONOKOWAI WAILEA ISLAND-WIDE LAHAINA WAILUKU

ISLAND-WIDE EVERY WEEK! FOR ADVERTISING INFORMATION CALL 661-3786

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

EVERY THURSDAY

KAHULUI

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

Thursday

08/25

Friday 08/26

Saturday08/27 Sunday08/28

Monday08/29 – Wednesday08/31

BAMBOO CHI

Summer Jazz Wailea 7pm

Bobby Ingram, 7:30pm

Neto Peraza Trio, Latin Dance Fever, $5, 7:30pm

Fulton Tashombe 7pm

MON - Martini Monday, No cover, 6:30pm

BOCALINO

Kilohanaw/Merv Oana No cover, 10pm

Neto Peraza, Latin Night $5, 10pm

Ohana Grooves $5, 10pm

Industry Night, DJ Shark In The Water, No cover, 9pm

MON - Mark Epstein & Friends, Blues & Jazz, No cover, 10pm; TUE - The New Project w/Jay Molina & Gilbert Emata & Marsha, $5, 10pm; WED - Tom Cherry Band, $5, 10pm

Randall Rospond, Poetic Folk No cover, 7:30-10:30pm

Shimmy Nights, Belly Dance No cover,7 & 8pm

Anick Violette, soulful French Acoustic, 7:30-10:30pm

Closed

CASANOVA

Brazilian Girls, $22adv, $25@door, 9:15pm & 12am

Bad ‘80s Dance Party $5, 9:45pm

Reggae On The Valley: Offical After Party, $15, 9:45pm

Upcountry Sunday Acoustic Style w/Blue Shoes, $7, 2pm

WED - Wild Wahine Wednesday w/DJ Blast, $5, 9:45pm

CHARLEY’S

Surf Industry Night No cover, 8pm

Vince Esquire $5, 9:30pm

Ladies Night w/DJ Durty $5, 10pm

No entertainment

MON - Kanoa, No cover, 9:30pm; TUE - No entertainment

100 Wailea Ike Dr., Wailea - 879-4777

1279 S. Kihei Road, Kihei - 874-9299

CAFE MARC AUREL

28 N. Market St. Wailuku - 244-0852

1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

142 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-9453

WANTED:

Interns Maui Time has immediate openings for internships. If you are a high school or college student, or recent grad this may be the opportunity for you! Potential positions in editorial, graphic design, accounting, or sales could give you the experience or college credits that you need. Previous experience is not necessary. Budding interns should want to work in a dynamic newspaper office with a great crew. Please send a resume to 658 Front St. # 7278, Lahaina, HI 96761 or call 808-661-3786 x3# and speak to Jennifer.

AUGUST 25, 2005

DA KINE CALENDAR

DA KINECALENDAR BIG SHOWS Brazilian Girls - Thursday (tonight!) thru Saturday. New York City's most talked about live electronica/dance band have sold out shows across Japan, Europe and the U.S. They’ve performed and recorded with Femi Kuti, Ozomatli and Me'shell Ndegeocello. Their performance is described as taking the elegant seduction and gentle mystery of a film noir nightclub act, infused with melodic beats, and added with the force and vivacity of a solid dance beat. Tickets: $22-25, on sale at www.hulatickets.com. Thu, 9:15 & midnight, Casanova, Makawao, 572-0220. FriSat, 10 p.m., Hapa’s Nightclub, Kihei, 879-9001. Steel Pulse - Saturday. Steel Pulse have explored various styles of music since 1975. But take note when it comes to the message, the UK's reggae band has remained close to their roots. The group has continued their commitment to fighting injustice, educating the masses, and promoting positive messages through spiritually uplifting music. Also with Wailing Souls and Ooklah The Moc. Tickets: $32 advance, $37 door. 4 p.m., A&B Amphitheater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Richard Ho‘opi‘i Leo Ki‘e Ki‘e Falsetto Contest - Saturday. One of Hawai‘i’s most unique musical traditions! Ten male contestants, who are required to be at least 18 years old, will compete for a recording deal with Hula Records. Tickets: $20 adults, $10 Kupuna, 7 p.m., The Ritz-Carlton, Kapalua, Salon Ballroom, 878-1888.

TICKETS ON SALE David Sanborn - Sept 1. One of the most influential

saxophonists in pop, R&B and jazz-crossover music of recent times. He grew up in St. Louis and played with many blues greats, then played important stints with the Butterfield Blues Band and many rock, pop and jazz names. He began recording as a bandleader in the mid'70s. Tickets: $45, $35, $25. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Hepcat - Sept 4. Not simply a "ska band" because they combine all forms of music, ska, rocksteady, reggae and dub, but also American soul and even jazz, into a sound that is distinctively Hepcat. With three albums under their belt and tours around the world, it should definitely be a dancing extravaganza. But now, why aren't they coming to Maui?! Tickets: $24 (all ages). 9 p.m., Pipeline Cafe, Oahu, 808-589-1999. Collective Soul - Sept 9. These Georgia rockers are loaded with the kind of pop/rock hits that have kept them at the top of the Billboard charts over the past decade. From heartfelt ballad to raucous chorus, this band delivers infectious stand-out song selections and memorable hooks, including “Gel,” “Shine” and “The World I Know.” A portion of the proceeds to benefit arts education in schools. Tickets: $45, $40, $35. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Loggins & Messina - Oct. 9. Yes, that’s right—a reunion tour of Loggins & Messina, one of the most popular and successful rock duos of the 1970s. Didn’t they sing “Whenever I Call You Friend”? We love that song! Plus, we do know they sing a song titled “Lahaina.” And hey, that’s cool. Tickets: $45, $55, $65. 7 p.m., A&B Amphitheater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Ozomatli - Oct 29. Los Angeles’ beloved Afro-Latinand-beyond style-mashers are a multi-racial, multicultural 10-piece band that is more than the sum of its parts. The band's deep commitment to social justice and progressive politics leads their music into a surprisingly natural collaboration of hip-hop, salsa, and funk. Thank goodness they’re playing again since a lot of people missed them last time! Tickets: $25 advance, $30 day of show. 7:30 p.m., A&B Amphitheater, MACC, 242-7469.

Cecilio & Kapono - Nov 5. Presented by the Ho‘onanea Series, Cecilio Rodriguez and Henry Kapono led the way to contemporary Hawaiian music, with a distinctive style and trademark harmony that has won the duo a place in Hawaiian music history. As a team and as solo artists, Cecilio and Kapono have released more than 20 albums, won multiple Nä Hökü Hanohano Awards. Their unique blend of Hawaiian and folk rock music make them enduring favorites. Tickets:$35, $28, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Beijing Modern Dance - Nov 10. With originality and diversity, this new generation of dancers ably demonstrate that the modern can flourish in new art forms in Mainland China. Their willful irreverence and verve has rapidly drawn media attention to the courageous young artists, who express themselves with the likes of music by Pink Floyd. The repertoire includes much of their own work, created with strong visual themes, an upheaval of expectations, confrontation of contemporary issues and vibrant social commentary. Tickets: $35, $20, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Storytelling: Tom Cummings - Nov 11. Hawaiian myths and legends with the intergenerational storytelling about the family of Tom Cummings from O‘ahu. Tickets: $20. 7:30 p.m., McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242SHOW. Story Telling: Pacific Peoples - Nov 12. This is a storytelling weekend! Native American storytellers from California tell of their people and legends, joined by Pacific Islander storytellers. Tickets: $20. 7:30 p.m., McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Leo Kottke - Nov 13. Guitarist, singer, composer and master of the 12-string guitar, Leo Kottke has what one reviewer has called “the most instantly recognizable guitar sound in the world.” Tickets: $35, 30, $35, $25. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Sistah Robi and Sean Na‘auao - Nov 18. Robi's multi-cultural, multi-lingual background is reflected in her music, which ranges from soft Hawaiian rhythms to funky reggae beats, from American pop songs to Polynesian traditional she sings it all in her own special way. Tickets: $28. 7:30 p.m., McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Na Lani ‘Eha 2005: The Four Royals - Nov 19. A program to celebrate and illuminate the cultural accomplishments of royal siblings King Kaläkaua, Queen Lili‘uokalani, Princess Likelike and Prince Leleiohoku, offering a glimpse into the life, talent, personality and humor of each. Tickets: $35, $25, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. 2005 EA Sports Maui Invitational - Nov 21-23. Top teams will gather to kick off the college basketball season. Games to be televised nationally on ESPN, ESPN2 and ESPNU. Featuring Arizona, Arkansas, Connecticut, Gonzaga, Kansas, Maryland, Michigan State and host Chaminade. For info, visit www.mauiinvitational.com. The Nutcracker - Nov 26-27. Ballet Hawaii presents The Nutcracker Tchaikovsky’s unforgettable score, lavish sets and gorgeous costumes make this the perfect holiday treat. Saturday, 2 & 7:30 p.m.; Sunday, 2 p.m, Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Alexander’s String Quartet - Dec 4. The Quartet has performed in the major music capitals of four continents to secure its standing as one of the world’s premier ensembles, especially admired for its vibrant and thrilling performances. “Sound and technical fluidity” are the benchmarks of Alexander String Quartet performances. An anniversary program in honor of Mozart. Tickets: $30. 5 p.m., McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Sonny Ching & Halau Na Mamo O Pu`uanahulu - Dec 10. This holiday performance, with more than 70 dancers ranging in age from teens to seniors, celebrates ancient Hawaiian cultural traditions through chant, song and dance. Tickets: $38, $28, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

Thursday 08/25 Friday08/26

Saturday08/27 Sunday08/28

COMPADRES BAR & GRILL

Monday08/29 – Wednesday08/31

Salsa $5, 10pm

Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-7189

HAPA’S NIGHTCLUB

Brazilian Girls $22 adv, $25 door, 9pm

Andy Bumatai 9pm

41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-9001

MON - Willie K, Live; TUE - Ultra Fest Trafic Light Party, 9pm; WED - S.I.N. Night w/DJ Z, 9pm

Teen Night

HARD ROCK CAFÉ

MON - Reggae At The Rock w/Marty Dread, $5, 10pm

900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

El Dog 9pm

DJs El Gato and Durty, Funky Latino Affair, $5, 10pm

DJ El Gato’s World Lounge 10pm

Rene Alonza 6pm

Kenny Roberts 6pm

El Nino 6pm

Trevor Jones No cover, 10pm

Shaggy & The Big Hawaiian w/DJ Styles, $6, 9:30pm

Habanero Brothers $7, 9:30pm

Conscious Healing $8, 9:30pm

Karaoke w/Alana Kay No cover, 9:30pm

Road Chief 9pm

41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-2849

JACQUES

120 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8844

KAHALE’S BEACH CLUB 36 Keala Pl., Kihei - 875-7711

KAHULUI ALE HOUSE

355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

DA KINECALENDAR Tower Of Power - Dec 19. The renowned horn-driven funk outfit Tower of Power has been making albums and touring the world steadily since the early '70s. Long considered one of the greatest horn sections in the business, the 10 band members have collectively and individually recorded with most of the legends of rock, funk, blues, soul and jazz. Their distinctive fusion of funk and jazz creates a drive that you will definitely get your groove on to. Tickets: $45, $35, $25. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Elvis Costello - April 2, 2006. With songs like, “Pump It Up,” “Watching The Detectives” and “Every Day I Write the Book” (our favorite!)—oh, we could go on and on! For over 25 years, Costello, along with his backing group The Attractions, have brought modern rock and roll through the ‘80s. This is a show to look forward to! 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242SHOW.

EVENTS Bishop Museum’s Hula Today Exhibit - Through

Aug. 31, 9 a.m.-5 p.m. at Old Jail Gallery, Old Lahaina Courthouse. This is the first international traveling exhibit of its kind and one of the world’s best known and beloved dance forms. Bringing together artifacts and costumes from winning Hula competitions, documents, films and sound recording, along with photographic images to tell the story of Hula. For info, call 661-0111. Aloha Ballroom Dance Academy’s Luau Party - Wed, 6:30-9 p.m. at Kihei Community Center, Main Hall. Dress in traditional or contemporary Hawaiian or Aloha Wear Fashions. A potluck dinner will be served. The Aloha Ballroom Dance Academy is a non-profit charitable corporation whose purpose is to educate the public about Latin & Ballroom Dancing through professionally instructed group classes and public performances. For info, call 879-0055.

FRIDAY, AUGUST 26

Music and Outdoor Movie - 6 p.m. at Village Course Practice Range, Kapalua Resort. Live entertainment by Uncle Boy Kanae & Friends. This month’s movie is Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark. Hot dogs, hamburgers, popcorn and soda for sale by Vino Restaurant. Yummy! Oh yeah, NO alcoholic beverages. Free. For info, call 669-0244.

SATURDAY, AUGUST 27

Aloha Festivals 2005 Royal Court Investiture - 12 p.m. at Honokahua preservation site, Ritz Carlton, Kapalua. This year’s festivals will be held on ancient Hawaiian burial site dating between the years 610 and the 1800. This trail also contains a portion of the 16th Century Alaloa, the kings trail which is a footpath that once incircled the entire Island. Wow! That is definitely a long trail. Free. For info, call 535-9099. Annual Richard Ho‘opi‘i Leo Ki‘e Ki‘e Falsetto Contest - 6 p.m. at The Ritz-Carlton, Kapalua, Salon Ballroom. Ten male contestants, who are required to be at least 18 years old, will compete for a recording deal with Hula Records, cash prizes courtesy of the Maui Hotel Association, products from Meadow Gold Dairies and Hawaiian Host Macadamia Nuts, Hilo Hattie and Hawaiian Airlines round trip tickets. Tickets: $20 for adults, $10 for kupuna. For info, call 878-1888. Hawaiian Plant Sale - 9 a.m.-12 p.m. at 150 Kanaloa Ave, Kahului (across from War Memorial). Maui Nui Botanical Gardens is committed to conserving Hawaiian plants and cultural heritage. Landscaping with Hawaiian and Polynesian introduced plants such as native Hibiscus, Koa, Mamaki, Kupukupu, Ilima, Uki’uki’ulu, Banana and Kalo. For info, call. 249-2798.

SUNDAY, AUGUST 28 LETTERS

NEWS

Gina Martinelli 6-9pm

Tony Ray 9pm

HENRY’S BAR & GRILL

COVER STORY

SURF

MON - Dr.Nat, Jazz/Salsa, No cover, 7:30-10pm; WED - MJ3, Live Jazz, 7-10pm MON - Steve Mendoza, 6pm; TUE-WED - Da Hawaiians, 6pm MON - The Crunch Pups, $7, 9:30pm; TUE - Island Grooves w/Vaugn, No cover, 10pm; WED - DJ Boomshot, No cover, 10pm

TAKE 5 Things I hate that most people love

Global Bellydance - 6:30 p.m. at The Studio Maui, Haiku. Featuring guest artist Rachel Brice of The Bellydance Superstars and The Indigo (CA), Kami Liddle (CA), BlackSheep BellyDance (CA & HI), Fee (Australia), Sylvia & Aziza (Holland), Jennifer (VA), Tribal Evolution (TX), The Shakti Dance Movement (O'ahu), Kandi & Frankie (MO), Martina & Rose-Marie (Canada). Tickets: $15. For info, call 575-9390.

DAVE MATTHEWS BAND How much do I hate that whining, screeching, pseudo-man otherwise known as Dave Matthews? Once I went out with this beautiful woman who taught pilates and was learning to belly-dance. Everything about our first date was great—except her suddenly mentioning some kind of “undying love” for all things Dave Matthews. “Listen to the lyrics,” she cooed. What do you mean, “listen?” He’s not speaking any known language. We never went out again, and I wasn’t a bit saddened. A good friend of mine says if Dave Matthews comes on the radio while he’s driving and for some reason he can’t switch the station fast enough that he’ll just veer into oncoming traffic and end it all. I heartily agree.

ART

Maui County Fair Photo Salon Contest Accepting submissions now through Sept 23. It’s time for all shutterbugs to enter their most-prized photos into the Maui County Fair Photo Salon Contest. The contest is open to all Hawai’i residents—only pictures taken after October 1, 2004. The contest has three divisions: Black & White, Digital and Color Print, with awards for 1st, 2nd and 3rd Places, plus three Honorable Mentions in each division. $2 entry fee. For info, call 242-2721. Wood Skin Ink - Through Sept 25, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. at Hui No'eau Visual Arts Center. “The Japanese Aesthetic in Modern Tattooing” is an exhibition of 18th and 19th century Ukiyo-e prints, alongside works on paper by five leading contemporary tattoo artists. With the aim to educate, inform and entertain, this exhibition will explore the influence of Japanese Edo period Ukiyo-e woodblock prints, images, themes and icons on the present day tattoo master. For info, call 572-6560, ext. 23. Japanese Sculptor Katsura Funakoshi - Thu, 7 p.m. at Hui No’eau Visual Arts Center. Katsura has been on to the international scene when he represented Japan at the Venice Biennale in 1988. He quickly became a leading artist in Japan's vibrant ‘90s art scene, and following in the footsteps of his father. What a way to continue the legacy! Free. For info, call 572-6560, ext. 23. Friday Night is Art Night - Fri, 6:30-9:30 p.m. at Lahaina Galleries, Lahaina. This week featuring Sue Perry & Dale Zarrella. Using only a palette knife to apply paint to canvas, Perry creates unique oil paintings full of life and movement with her adept handling of this fast-paced style. A master sculptor of green sea turtles and Hawaiian goddesses, Zarrella was handpicked out of numerous sculptors in Hawai’i. Wine and Pupus will be served. Free. For info, call 661-8005.

CAMERON CROWE That people flock to this guy’s movies shows that American movie audiences are by and large filled with nostalgic, sentimental fools. Say Anything? Pointless. Almost Famous? Goofy. Vanilla Sky? A two-hour long Futurama episode, though not as insightful. What do you people see in this guy? Please, please, PLEASE don’t tell me it’s his soundtracks. I swear all he does is turn on the radio every time he hits a music cue and then plugs in what he hears. I don’t need some Hollywood hack making millions selling my own youth back to me—if I want to get teary-eyed over my childhood, I’ll fire up a Gilligan’s Island DVD.

CHOCOLAT I should have walked out of this 2001 flick after 20 minutes, and still to this day curse myself for staying put. The things I could have done with that time— weeding the back yard, cleaning the garbage cans, watching Wheel of Fortune reruns… Seriously, this amazingly popular movie HAD NO STORY. Woman comes to bitter town, woman gives chocolate to town, town’s life becomes glorious. That’s not a movie, it’s a commercial for Hershey Kisses.

REALITY TV I can actually feel my precious, precious neurons popping each time I linger for a few moments in front of one of the current 1.6 billion “reality TV” shows. And God bless MTV for bringing us the utterly mindless Real World and the countless louts who followed in its wake, thinking they could do “better.” Ooh, let’s put a camera in an airline terminal! Yeah, I can’t get enough of standing around Gate 37 in real life. How about a motorcycle garage! I’m sorry, but one chopper goes together like every other chopper on this planet. Plastic surgeons? Bounty hunters? Crab fishermen? Who comes up with this stuff?

KEIKI Open House New Members Drive - Sun, 11 a.m.-

1 p.m. at Beit Shalom Synagogue, Kihei. While registering for the upcoming year, kids can enjoy a complimentary BBQ and Jumping Castle. A meet and greet with Rabbi David, Glickman, Board of directors, and the teachers of the Jewish School of Maui. For info, call 874-5397

LECTURES

Solar Synergy - Sat, 10 a.m.-12 p.m. at Hawaii Nature Center, Iao Valley. Learn about solar energy and the power of the sun along with creating solar ovens to cook up a treat. While your solar food is simmering, take a hike through Ïao forest to investigate how plants and animals have evolved to use the rays of the sun. For info, call 244-6500. Coral Reefs & Sustainable Marine Resources - Mon, 5:30-8:45 p.m. at Pacific Whale Foundation's Ocean Science Discovery Center, Maalaea. Protect your business by protecting Coral Reefs & Sustainable Marine Resources. For info, call 415-834-0900 ext. 313.

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

COFFEE There’s never been any doubt in my mind that coffee is a ridiculously addictive substance. Why else would so many millions of normal, otherwise healthy and intelligent people pour such a disgusting substance down their gullet? It’s the color of mud even if you don’t insist on thinning it with cream, its smell is hardly what I want to wake up to in the morning and it tastes foul—in fact, a gagging reflex is overcoming me as I write these words. -ANTHONY PIGNATARO

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

Thursday08/25

Friday08/26

Saturday08/27 Sunday08/28

Monday08/29 – Wednesday08/31

Tom Cherry Band 10pm

KIMO’S

845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811

KOBE JAPANESE STEAKHOUSE 136 Dickenson St., Lahaina - 667-5555

Karaoke 9:30pm

LIFE’S A BEACH

Brian & The Boys from Cool Rush, 9pm

Underground $5, 9pm

Vince Esquire $5, 9pm

Karaoke 9pm

MON - Open Jam w/Adam, 9pm; TUE - Night w/Kanoa, 9pm; WED - Land Shark Pool Tournament, 9pm

LOBBY LOUNGE

Jazz w/Sal Godinez & Marcus Johnson, 8:30-11:30pm

Nils & Anastasia 8:30-11:30pm

Ricardo Dioso 8:30-11:30pm

MON - Nils & Anastasia, 8:30-11:30pm; WED - Jazz w/Sal Godinez & Marcus Johnson, No cover, 8:30-11:30pm

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891–8010

Four Seasons Resort, Wailea - 874-8000

Funky Munkey $5, 10pm

LONGHI’S

888 Front St., Lahaina - 667-2288

Live Music 9pm

LULU’S

1945 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-9944

Live Music 9pm

“NO PAIN...NO STAIN” OPEN NOON 7 DAYS TO A WEEK 8PM

Thanks to all of those who voted Island Ink the “Best Tattoo Shop” on Maui for Two Years in a Row

100 HANA HWY. PAIA 579-9461 WWW.ISLANDINKTATTOO.COM

WED - Karaoke, 9pm

DA KINECALENDAR Confessions of an Economic Hitman - Sat, 56:30 p.m. at Maui Booksellers, Wailuku. John Perkins tells of his own inner journey from willing servant of an empire to impassioned advocate for the rights of oppressed people. Covertly recruited by the United States National Security Agency and on the payroll of an international consulting firm, he’s traveled to Indonesia, Panama, Ecuador, Colombia, Saudi Arabia, Iran and other strategically important countries. For info, call 244-9091.

POETRY

Express Yourself - Wed, 7 p.m. at Café Marc Aurel, Wailuku. Express yourself with music, song and poetry on Open Mic Night. And yes, you have to be 21 to attend and perform. For info, call 276-5467. Poetry Slam - Sun, 7 p.m. at Maui Booksellers, Wailuku. Poets and spoken word artists are invited to present and perform original works of three minutes or less in any style and on any theme in competition for a $100 cash prize going the top poet of the evening. Judges will be selected randomly from audience members, so come down and enjoy some of the most talented and creative bards on Maui. For info, call 2449091.

POLITICAL

Seafood Restaurant & Sushi Bar Late Night Specials 10pm to 1am – 21 & over with I.D.

50% OFF SUSHI & APPETIZERS FREE KARAOKE - DRAFT BEER SPECIALS

KIHEI, THURSDAY - SATURDAY KAPALUA, THURSDAY & FRIDAY

EARLY BIRD SPECIAL 5:30pm to 6:00pm DAILY

Kapalua 669-6286 The Shops at Kapalua

Kihei 879-0004 Near Foodland

AUGUST 25, 2005

DA KINE CALENDAR

HRC MAUI 900 Front St., Lahaina Info: 808.667.7400

MONDAYS

1/2 Wells & Drafts

MARTY DREAD’S REGGAE AT THE ROCK $5 COVER

HAPPY HOUR DAILY 3:00-6:00pm

1/2 PRICE WELL COCKTAILS AND DRAFTS h a r d r o c k . c o m

Film: “Beyond Treason” - Fri, 7 p.m. at Ka Lama Building 103. Featuring the testimony of experts Dr. Doug Rokke and Dr. Leuren Moret and of United States military veterans who demand answers to questions that the Department of Defense will not address. This film presents comprehensive documentation from U.S. Government archives of a massive cover-up, including military and civilian experimentation, dating back over 60 years. Free. For info, call 5799442. Sweet Honey in Tthe Rock: Raise Your Voice Fri, 7 p.m. at Maui Booksellers, Wailuku. A feature-length documentary about the Grammy award-winning a capella vocal ensemble. A portrait of the world renowned vocal group's 30th year, as it takes its sound and political message to a changing America and struggles with a surprise decision by founder Reagon. With sold out shows all over the globe. No other ensemble has so successfully distilled the essence of the musical legacy of African Americans. For info, call 244-9091.

SPORTS

North Shore Paddle 2005 - Wed, 9 a.m. at Ho'okipa. The race will end at Paia Bay. A nonprofit event, with all proceeds benefiting the Surfrider Foundation. Surfboard division racers paddle on any traditional foam and fiberglass surfboard. There’ll be separate divisions for men and women. Cash prizes for top finishers in each. For info, call 579-8999.

STAGE

Open Auditions for A Christmas Carol - Sept 1, 7 p.m. and Sept 3, 2 p.m. at the MAPA building, Wailuku. The cast of characters includes: The Storyteller, Ebenezer Scrooge, Fred (Scrooge's nephew), Bob Cratchit, Mrs. Cratchit, Tiny Tim, Mrs. Colby (Scrooge's maid), the Ghost of Jacob Marley, the Ghost of Christmas Past, The Ghost of Christmas Present, The Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come, Scrooge at age 6, Scrooge at age 13, Scrooge at age 18, Dick Wilkens, Mr. Fezziwig, Mrs. Fezziwig and Belle Fezziwig. Which one are you? Call 244-8760.

DINNER MUSIC WEST MAUI

BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria – John Kane, Wed, Thu and Fri; Harry Troupe, Sat; Kaleo Phillips, Sun; Clay Mortenson Mon, Tue. All sets from 7:30-10 p.m. 730 Front St., Lahaina, 661-0700.

Cheeseburger In Paradise – Brooks Maguire, Thu, Sat, Sun and Wed; Harry Troupe, Fri; Gail Swanson, Mon and Thu. All sets from 4:30-7:30 p.m. 811 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4855. Cool Cat Cafe - Erik Pietsch, Mon and Thu; Howard Ahia Fri-Sun; Hau Phat, Wed. All Sets 7:30-10 p.m. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 667-0908. Fish & Game Brewing Co. & Rotisserie - Nino Toscano, Thur and Fri; Kawika Lum Ho, Sat; Damien, Tue; E rnest Puaa, Wed Open mic night; Brian Haia, Mon. All sets from 6-9 p.m. 4405 Honoapiilani Highway, 669-3474. Hula Grill - Kawika Lum , Albert & Billy, Mon; Jarret Roback and Albert & Billy, Tue; Ernest Pua’a and Brian & Roy, Wed; Ernest Pua’a and Bradah Brian & Don Thur; Bradah Brian & Roy, Fri; TBA, Sat; Kawika Lum Ryan Tanaka & Friends, Sun. All sets 6:30-9 p.m. 2435 Kaanapali Parkway, Building P, Kaanapali, 667-6636. Java Jazz/Soup Nutz – Acoustic Music every night. 7 p.m. 3350 Lower Honoapiilani Rd., 667-0787. Kahana Terrace Restaurant – Harry Troupe, Tue and Thu; Randy Reno, Sat. All sets from 6-9 p.m. Sands of Kahana Resort, 669-5399. Kimo’s – Glen Kaku Grava; Thu, Sam Ahia, Sun, Hula Honey’s Mon-Tue7-8:30 p.m. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4811. Leilani’s On The Beach – Crazy Fingers, Thu, 4-6 p.m.; JD & Friends, Fri-Sat, 2:30-5:30 p.m.; Kilohana, Sun, 3:30-6 p.m; Wed Jarret Robak 4-6 p.m. 2435 Ka’anapali Parkway, Building J, Ka’anapali, 661-4495. Moose McGillycuddy’s - Greg & Steve, Thu; Llayne & Greg, Fri; Mark & Mike, Sat-Sun; Anastasia, Wed. All sets 6-9 p.m. 844 Front St., Lahaina, 667-7758. Pioneer Inn – Ah-Tim Eleniki (Local-style guitar), Thu, 6-9 p.m.; Greg Di Piazza, Wed, 6-9 p.m.; Captain Billy Bones, Tue, 6-8 p.m. 658 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-3636. Reilley’s Steaks & Seafood - Gene Argel, Mon and Tue, Wed-Fri, 6-8 p.m. 4405 Honoapi`ilani Hwy, Ste #304 Kahana, 667-7477 Sea House Restaurant – Hawaiian music with Albert Kaina and Kincades Basques, Thu; Kincade Basques, Fri, Sat, Mon and Tues; Kapule Paoa, Sun; Albert Kaina, Wed. All sets 7-9 p.m. Napili Kai Beach Resort, 5900 Honoapiilani Road, Napili, 669-1500.

SOUTH MAUI

Blue Marlin Harbor-Front Grill & Bar - Boy Kana’e and Ka’ Uhaneleo, Fri and Mon, 6:30-9 p.m.; Braddah Frances and friends, Sat, 6:30 p.m.; Terri Garrison, Sun, 4-6:30 p.m Maalaea Harbor, 244-8844. Capische? – Mark Johnston, Thu-Sat; Brian Cuomo, Su and Wed; Sal & Estaire Godinez, Mon. All sets 7-10 p.m. Diamond Resort, 555 Kaukahi, 879-2224. Maalaea Grill – Benoit Jazz Works, Thu, Fri and Sun, 6:30-9 p.m.; Jimmy C Jazz, Sat, 7-9 p.m. Maalaea Village Shops, 243-2206. Marco’s Southside Grill – Various artists (piano), Mon-Sun. All sets from 7-10 p.m. 1445 S. Kihei Rd., 874-4041. Mulligan’s on the Blue – Wailea Nights, Thu and Fri, 8 p.m.; Celtic Tigers, Sun, 7 p.m.; Gypsy Pacific, Mon, 7 p.m.; Acoustico, Tue, 7 p.m. 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874-1131. Seawatch Restaurant - Nightly Music 6-9 p.m. 100 Wailea Golf Club Dr., 875-8080. South Shore Tiki Lounge - Sunset happy hour, $3 special's. Live entertainment. Tony & Peter, Sun, Tue and Thu; Wed and Fri, Trevor Jones 4-6 p.m. Outdoor seating on the Aloha Jungle Lanai. 1913 Kihei Road, Kalama Village, 874-6444. Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Café – Guitar and vocals w/ Brado, Wed-Fri; Brian Wittman, Sat; Patrick Mayor, Sun-Mon. All sets from 6-10 p.m. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983. Yorman’s By The Sea – All That Jazz Band, WedSun 7-10 p.m. 760 S. Kihei Rd. Kihei 874-8385.

CENTRAL MAUI

Thursday 08/25 Friday08/26

DJ Insane No cover, 9pm

MON - Mark & Mike, 9pm; TUE - DJ Mackie, $5, 9pm; WED - DJ Mackie Mac, No cover, 9pm

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea - 874-1131

Murray Thorne No cover, 8pm

Celtic Tigers No cover, 7pm

MON - Gypsy Pacific, No cover, 7pm; TUE - Tuesday Blues, No cover, 7pm; WED - No entertainment

Dezmon & Roadblock 9pm

The Easy 9pm

Adam Bowen 9pm

MON - Erin Smith, 9pm; TUE - Curtis Williams, 9pm; WED - Jroq, 9pm

Live Jazz, No cover 9pm-12am

Live Jazz, No cover, 9pm-12am

Hau Phat is Dat Thursday 9pm

Reggae On The Valley Pre Party, 9pm

Reggae 0n The Valley Offical After Party, 9pm

Uncle Willie K 8:30-11:30pm

MON - Shake Your Heini w/Kapakahi, 9pm; TUE - Bikini Tops & Surf Shorts w/DJ Stylz, No cover, 9pm; WED - Bobby Ingram, Live Blues, $5, 9pm

Karaoke, 10pm-1am Karaoke, 10pm-1am

Wailea Nights featuring Eric Wailea Nights featuring Eric Gilliom & Barry Flanagan, 8pm Gilliom & Barry Flanagan, 8pm Catastrophic 9pm

NEPTUNES

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-2555

PACIFIC’O

505 Front St., Lahaina - 667-4341

PARADICE BLUZ

744 Front St., Lahaina - 667-5299

SANSEI 115 Bay Dr., Kapalua - 669-6286 SANSEI Kihei Town Center - 879-0004

HOLOHOLO

Dr.Nat Available for private events, parties & weddings

Solo/duets and with Pacificaribe Jacque’s every Monday 7-10pm • No Cover

Lif e

Fr u

GIRL

(3-5 piece) playing Latin, Gypsy and Brazilian Jazz, Reggae, Contemporary Island Style or with Hot Tropical Latin/Brazilian dance band

Check out our SWEET new website.

844 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7758

Monday08/29 – Wednesday08/31

DJ Mackie Mac No cover, 9pm

MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDY’S

Saturday08/27 Sunday08/28

Rio Ritmo

IT WAS LIKE THAT WHEN I GOT HERE

SUNDAY

UNCLE WILLIE K

Call 572-9536 for booking or visit website www.drnat.com

Aug-Sept MAUI’S TRUE LIVE MUSIC VENUE MONDAY

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

HAU PHAT IS DAT THURSDAY 28

Playing at Hapas Fri, Sept 16th and Casanovas Sat, Sept 24th (6-9 piece) playing Salsa, Samba, Pop Latin

SHAKE YOUR BIKINI TOPS LIVE BLUES HEINI SURF SHORTS BOBBY LIVE MUSIC W DJ STYLZ INGRAM KAPAKAHI NO COVER $3 HEINEKENS

SHAKE YOUR BIKINI TOPS LIVE BLUES HEINI SURF SHORTS VOODOO LIVE MUSIC W DJ STYLZ SUNS KAPAKAHI NO COVER $3 HEINEKENS CHECK PARADICEBLUZ.COM FOR CALENDAR UPDATES

PRE-PARTY

HAU PHAT IS DAT THURSDAY

THE HEAT IS ON DJ HEAT

HIP-HOP/DANCE 9

HAU PHAT IS DAT THURSDAY

THE HEAT IS ON DJ HEAT

UNCLE WILLIE K

REGGAE ON REGGAE ON THE VALLEY THE VALLEY OFFICIAL AFTER PARTY 3

LIVE MUSIC 10

LIVE MUSIC

HIP-HOP/DANCE

Gift Baskets • Fruit Baskets • Flowers Delivered on Maui and now Shipping WORLDWIDE.

(808)27-SWEET(277–9338) SweetlifefruitCo@aol.com

s r

VISIT US AT www.sweetlifefruitco.com

• FRIDAY, AUGUST 26 •

Reggae On The Valley Pre Party!

with Marty Dread, Pana’ewa, Bonafied & Sudden Rush •SATURDAY, AUGUST 27•

Rush House Entertainment Presents:

Ooklah the moc Reggae On The Valley Official After Party!

744 FRONT STREET • A FEW STEPS BELOW FRONT STREET • 667-JAZZ (5299) • paradicebluz.com LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

Thursday08/25 Friday 08/26

Saturday08/27 Sunday08/28

Monday08/29 – Wednesday08/31

DJ Blast $10, 9:30pm

SPATS TRATTORIA

Hyatt Regency, Ka’anapali - 667-4727

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE

DJ Sunny No cover, 9pm

DJ 9pm

Kanoa & Cody 9pm

MON-WED - DJ, 9pm

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR

Crunch Pups No cover, 9pm

Open Jukebox 9pm

Kenny Roberts & Friends 9pm

Hale & The Hot Lava Band No cover, 9pm

MON - DJ, No cover, 10pm; TUE-WED - Live Entertainment, 10pm

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR

Crunch Pups $3, 9pm

Habanero Brothers $3, 9pm

TSUNAMI NIGHTCLUB

DJ Dancing, $10, 9:30pm

Lahaina Grown 10pm

DJ Vince, Hip Hop & R&B 10pm

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-6444

2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-0602

1127 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-1380

3850 Wailea Alanui Dr. - 875-1234

WAVE RIDERS BAR & GRILL 900 Front St, Lahaina - 661-1200

Alternative Jams 10pm

MON - No Entertainment, No cover; TUE - Erin Smith, No cover; WED - John Moore Project w/Elan Rae, 9pm Reggae 10pm

MON - Top 40 Hits, 10pm; TUE - Live Rock Jams, 10pm; WED - DJ John Scott, Underground Vibes, 10pm

DA KINECALENDAR Brigit & Bernard's Gardencafe - Live entertainment. 335 Hoohana St., Kahului Café Marc Aurel - Gene Argel and Shiro Mori, Thursdays, 7-10 p.m., Shimmy Nights with Bellyroll Dance Company, 2nd Friday of every month, 7-9 p.m. 28 N. Market Street, Wailuku near the Iao Theatre. 244-0852. Mañana Garage – Nightly Neto & Friends, Latin music, 6:30 -9 p.m. 33 Lono Ave., Kahului, 873-0220. Sushi Go - Presents a concept unlike anything on Maui: Conveyor-belt sushi. Live Music every Wed, 4 8 p.m. Queen Ka'ahumanu Center, Kahului, 877-8744.

UPCOUNTRY MAUI

Jacque’s - Live Jazz, Mon, 5 p.m.120 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-8844. Livewire Cafe - Various Artists, Fri-Sat and Wed, 9 p.m. 137 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-6009. Moana Cafe - Hula Honeys, vintage and contemporary Hawaiian music with elegance and aloha. Live Jazz, Wed and Fri; Anik, Sun, 6-9 p.m. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9999.

RESORT SHOWS

WEST MAUI n EMBASSY VACATION RESORT

104 KA’ANAPALI SHORES, LAHAINA, 661-2000 Ohana Bar & Grill: Live music, Thu and Wed; Patrick Major, Fri; Wayne & Friends, Sun; Ernest Pua’a w/ Hawaiian music, Mon and Tue. All sets from 5:309:30 p.m. Torch lighting ceremony nightly. Spats: Weeping Banyan Lounge with nightly Live Hawaiian Contemporary Music 6:30-9:30 p.m. HYATT HOTEL REGENCY MAUI RESORT 200 NOHEA KAI DR. 661-1234 Swan Court: Live music with Jimmy Borges and his 17-piece Big Band 7 p.m-11 p.m. Sun-Tue. KA’ANAPALI BEACH HOTEL 2525 KAANAPALI PARKWAY, 661-0011 Kupanaha: Maui Magic for All Ages: Illusions and dinner show Tue-Sat, 4:30 p.m., Kanahele Room; Lanui, live music and dancing, 6-9 nightly. Free hula show, 6:30-7:30 nightly; Sunday Champagne Brunch with Hawaiian music by Polinahe, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. Tiki Courtyard Of Ka’anapali Beach Hotel: Live music featuring Hawaii’s premier Slack Key Guitarists Ola Hou with Pekelo Cosma and Ohana Brown, Fri, 6-9 p.m. Whalers Village Center Stage: Polynesian Hula Show, Sat, 6:30-7 p.m.; Sunset Jazz Show, Sun, 5-8 p.m.; Dances of Polynesian, Mon, 6:30-7 p.m. and Drums of Tahiti 7:30-8 p.m; Polynesian Hula Show, Wed, 6:30-7 p.m. and Tahitian Dance 7:30-8 p.m. All Shows free. MAUI MARRIOTT 100 NOHEA KAI DRIVE, KAANAPALI, 667-1200 Nalu’s: Kilohana, Wed, 8-10:30 p.m. Napili Kai Beach Resort 5900 Honoapiilani Hwy, Napili, 669-1500 Hawaiian Music: Kincaid & Albert, Thu; Kincaid Basques Fri-Sat, Mon-Tue; Kapule Paoa, Sun; Albert Kaina, Wed; All Hawaiian music shows from 7-9 p.m. RITZ-CARLTON KAPALUA ONE RITZ-CARLTON DRIVE, KAPALUA, 669-6200 Lobby Lounge: Live music, 6-10 nightly. Banyan Tree Restaurant: World fusion duo Ranga Pae,Tue-Sat, 6:15-9:45 p.m. Kapalua Indoor Theater: Masters of Hawaiian Slack Key Guitar Concerts series features traditional Hawaiian music. Every Tues 7:30 p.m. Tickets: $40 visitor and $30 kama`aina rate. 1-888-669-3858. ROYAL LAHAINA RESORT 2780 KEKAA DRIVE, KAANAPALI, 661-3611

n n

HAPPY HOUR 7 DAYS A WEEK . 3PM-6PM $1 WELLS & DOMESTIC DRAFTS $2 PREMIUM DRAFTS, LONG ISLAND ICED TEA, CHI-CHI’S, PINA CALADAS, MARGARITAS

NIGHT Y TUES-$1 L T H OUR FAMOUS “DOLLAR NIGHT”!!! G I N IALS C E SP -CLOSE WED REDNECKS & ROMANCE PM 9

JACK DANIELS - MILLER HIGH LIFE!!!

THUR-ABSOLUT NIGHT ALL ABSOLUT DRINKS ON SPECIAL!!!

FRI-SMIRNOFF TWIST ALL TWISTS $2.75

SAT- CROWN ROYAL $3 CROWN ROYAL . $3.75 ABSOLUT LEVEL . DJ & DANCING

AUGUST 25, 2005

DA KINE CALENDAR

"Eddie and Eddie" w/Eddie Lilikoi and Eddie Sebala, 5-9:30 nightly in the Royal Ocean Terrace. Royal Lahaina Luau featuring authentic Hawaiian and Polynesian song and dance at 5 nightly. SHERATON MAUI HOTEL 2605 KAANAPALI PARKWAY, 661-0031 Lagoon Bar Entertainment w/hula dancers, 6-8 nightly; Bobby & Ralph, Thu, Mon and Tue; Ralph & Allan, Fri; Fausto & Kawaika, Sat and Sun; Nathan & Ralph, Wed. Torchlighting and cliff diving ceremony at sunset, 7-8 nightly. THE WESTIN MAUI HOTEL 2365 KAANAPALI PARKWAY, 667-2525 Tropica: Mitch Kepa, Mon and Sat-Su; Benny Uyetake, Tue-Fri, 6-9 p.m. Tableside magic by Fortunato Tue and Thu, and Wed and Sat 7- 9 p.m.

SOUTH MAUI n FOUR SEASONS RESORT WAILEA

3900 WAILEA ALANUI, WAILEA, 874-8000 Lobby Lounge, Hawaiian music w/Steve Repollo and Alan Villeran, Thu, 5:30-7:30 p.m. followed by jazz w/Sal Godinez and Marcus Johnson, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; contemporary music w/Clay Mortensen and George Tavoularis, Fri, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; island style trio, Sat and Mon, 5:307:30 p.m. w/hula dancer 5:30-6:30 p.m.; Pam Peterson and Rudy Baria, Sun, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; Nils & Anastasia (of VooDoo Suns) live & unplugged Mon and Sat, 8:3011:30 p.m.; Clay Mortensen and Gilbert Emata, Wed, 8:30-11:30 p.m. Sunset torchlighting nightly. GRAND WAILEA RESORT HOTEL & SPA 3850 WAILEA ALANUI, WAILEA, 875-1234 Botero Bar entertainment, Live Music, Wed, 5:309:30 p.m.; Strolling Hawaiian duo in the Humuhumunukunukuapua’a nightly. THE FAIRMONT KEA LANI MAUI 4100 WAILEA ALANUI, WAILEA, 875-4100 Cafe Ciao Restaurant. Live music with Toshomee 6:30 p.m. -9:30 p.m.Thu-Sat.s WAILEA MARRIOTT 3700 WAILEA ALANUI, WAILEA, 879-1922 Hawaiian Entertainment w/hula 6-9 nightly in Kumu Bar & Grill. Hawaiian entertainment 9-11 nightly in the Mele Mele Lounge featuring Pam Gamboa Peterson Mon and Sat, Mitch Kepa & Raymond "Mundo" Medeiros. Paradise & Ka Poe O Hawaii perform at the Luau, Mon, Tue, Thu and Fri. RENAISSANCE WAILEA BEACH RESORT 3550 WAILEA ALANUI, WAILEA, 879-4900 Sunset Terrace: Live Hawaiian contemporary music by Lono, Mon-Tue; Bobby Krueger, Wed-Thu; Mahalo Greg, Fri; Rama Camarillo, Sat; Mondo Kane, Sun. All sets 6-9 p.m. MAUI PRINCE HOTEL 5400 MAKENA ALANUI, 874-1111 Molokini Lounge: Ron Kuala’au, Hawaiian and contemporary guitar and vocals, Sun, 6-10:30 p.m. and Tue, Thu and Sat, 6-8:30 p.m.; Mele ‘Ohana duo, Mon, Wed. and Fri, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. and 6-8 p.m., Mon-Sat, 8:30-10:30 p.m.

n n n

n n

EAST MAUI n HOTEL HANA-MAUI

HANA, 248-8211 Hawaiian Music in Paniolo Lounge: Thu thru Sun, 6:30-9:30 p.m.; Hula show, every Thu and Sun, 7:30-8:15 p.m. in the Main Dining Room.

Send your listings & photos for the Da Kine Calendar to calendar@mauitime.com or fax (808) 661-0446

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LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

AUTOMOTIVE

CLASSES & INSTRUCTION

$500 POLICE IMPOUNDS Cars from $500! Tax Repos, US Marshall and IRS Sales! Cars, Trucks, NEWS FLASH! POLAR ICE CAPS SUV’s, Toyota’s, Honda’s, Chevy’s and MELTING AT ALARMING RATE! more! For Listings Call 1-800-820- Learn to SCUBA before it’s too late! 6515 x1105. (AAN CAN) Dive Today with SHAKA DIVERS, Professional, Safe, Fun Lessons and Dive Tours. Torpedo Dives, HydroOptix Masks! (808) 250-1234 www. shakadivers.com it’s SHAKA-RIFIC Inexpensive Paint Jobs,

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Paint Jobs Cars at $469 • Trucks at $669

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Youth Class Begins Wed. Sept. 14th for 5 weeks Join us and rediscover the JOY OF SELF-EXPRESSION with Andrea who has had over 10 classes and 40 students since teaching on Maui in 2004! Call for information or to register 573-3253

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES

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coins, tokens, medals, stamps, paper money, Hawaiiana, sport collectibles

CHANGE YOUR LIFESTYLE! NOW HIRING FOR 2005 A very substantial 1st year earning Postal Positions. $17.50-$59.00 +/hr. potential. Earn what you deserve & Full benefits/ paid training and vacacontrol your own schedule. If serious, tions. No experience necessary. 1800-678-0467 (AAN CAN) 800-584-1775. Reference #5000. (AAN CAN) EARN $3500 WEEKLY! 2005 POSTAL POSITIONS Answering Surveys Online! $25-$75 Per Survey! Guaranteed Paychecks. Process $17.50 -$59.00 +/hour. Full benefits. E-mails Online $25 Per E-mail. Mystery Paid training & vacations. No experiShoppers Earn $57/HourShopping! ence necessary! Green Card OK! For www.RealCashPrograms.com (AAN more information call 1-866-714-8894 CAN) ext. 1050 (AAN CAN)

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AUGUST 25, 2005

CLASSIFIED

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The Plantation House

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ALL CASH CANDY ROUTE! Do you earn $800 in a day? Your own NESS OPPORTUNITY local candy route. Includes 30 Prime location in extremely high Machines and Candy. All for $9,995. demographic area for a world class 1-800-807-6525. (AAN CAN) gourmet deli/take-out with a Coffee/Cappuccino/wine bar and organic grocery. If you have the conMAUI MAGIC TAN cept and experience, a space is available for lease. Immediate opportunity Is adding to it’s team! Looking for awaits the right operation and opera- part-time, motivated sales professiontors. call 214-316-2777 als. Great pay, FREE tans, generous discounts. Call Kim or Janet at 662EARN EXTRA INCOME FULLY STOCKED HYDROPONIC 4653 or email Assembling CD Cases from home. janet@mauimagictan.com GARDEN STORE 300 Hukilike St. #2M, Kahului No experience necessary! Start Commission Only Sales Person Industrial. Call (808) 283-3427 for Immediately! 1-800-267-3944 EXT. 150. www.easywork-greatpay.com Great Opportunity. Must be knowlhours & directions. Invalid in MD, WI, ND, SD. (AAN CAN) edgeable of local tourism. cgh.@caddiegolfhawaii.com (808) 344-0256 UP TO $4,000 WEEKLY!! $800 WEEKLY! 11 Year Nationwide Company Now Hiring! Easy Work, Sending Out Our Mailing letters from home! Easy JEWELRY • DIAMONDS Simple One Page Brochure! Free work! Free postage, supplies! FREE WATCHES • COINS Postage, Supplies! FREE INFORMA- INFO. PACKAGE! Call 24/hrs. 1-800COLORED STONES TION, CALL NOW!! 1-800-242-0363 242-0363 ext. 4223. MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS Ext. 4200 (AAN CAN) www.NICpublishers.com (AAN CAN)

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HELP WANTED EVALUATORS! We require evaluators throughout Hawaii to audit businessALOHA VALUED READERS es. WE PAY YOU — YOU PAY NO MONEY! Apply www.secretshop- We would like to let our readers know that we try to screen most of net.com our ads. We read back the ad copy to ensure that it is the correct informaMovie extras, Actors, Models! NEW REAL-LIFE TV Make $100-$300/day. No Exp. Req., series seeking shopaholics, gam- tion that advertisers want. If you see FT/PT All looks needed!1-800-714- blers, steroid users, bulimics, gang the acronym (AAN CAN) that ad is a 7565 (AAN CAN) members, cult members, or anyone national ad and was not submitted struggling with an addiction of com- directly to us. If you have a question MEDIA MAKE-UP ARTISTS pulsion. www.newdocudrama.com directly concerning AAN CAN, please check out aancan.org earn up to $500/day for (AAN CAN) television,CD/videos, film, fashion. One week course in Los Angeles SALES REPS/ ACCOUNT Execs/ while building portfolio.Brochure 310Sales Managers. FOR SALE 3 6 4 0 6 6 5 Make $30-100K per year! No experiw w w. M e d i a M a k e u p A r t i s t s . c o m ence required. Paid training for all BANK FORECLOSURES! (AAN CAN) positions. Great benefits. Med/ Homes from $10,000! 1-3 bedroom Dental/ Paid Vacations. Call 1-866-291- available! HUD, Repos, REO, etc. These FILM, MUSIC RECORDING, homes must sell! For Listings Call 1-8001581. ext. 1500.0 (AAN CAN) RADIO 820-6515 ext. 3015. (AAN CAN) PROFESSIONAL NAIL TECH. Schools Don’t Work! Don’t waste $25,000 or more on schools when we NEEDED can get you in the door. Train one-onIndependent, Self-Starter to lease one in actual Recording Studios, station in Lahaina. Call Kim or Mary at Radio Stations and Hollywood Movie 661-1819 sets shooting in your local area. www.careerconnection2000.com *MOVIE EXTRAS* (AAN CAN) Earn $150-$300/Day All Looks/Types Needed. No Experience Necessary. Call 661-3786x5 by 4 GOVERNMENT JOBS TV, Music Videos, Commercials, Film, pm on Monday to Earn Up to $12 to $48/Hour. Full Print. Call Tollfree 7 days! 1-800-260Medical/Dental Benefits, Paid 3949 x3025. (AAN CAN) get your ad in Training. Clerical, Administrative, Maui Time Weekly! Homeland Security, Wildlife, Law $ MODELS WANTED $ Enforcement, More! 1-800-320-9353 For calendar magazine and artistic x.2001. (AAN CAN) print work. Ages 18 to 35. 573-3712

NOTICES

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LETTERS

NEWS

Your cat hates you. If it was big enough, it would pin you down and eat your liver right out of your living body. Its diminutive size requires it to view you as a food dispenser, radiator and masseur, instead of as plaything and prey. Any love you perceive coming from it is purely projection; your desperate wish, whose many contradictions you choose to ignore. If you haven’t figured out where I’m going with this, I’ll make it more plain: This week, you’ll be forced to face a few unpleasant truths, whether you like it or not. You can choose to ignore their persistent presentation, if you insist—but that doesn’t make them any less true.

AD DEADLINE

Call 661-3786

HIV COUNSELING AND TESTING

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19) Try something new. I know you like your tried-and-true roster of winning combinations, but what you’re perfectly happy with day after day and year after year can bore some of those who wish to share it with you. Go ahead, dip your strawberries in a white chocolate balsamic vinegar fondue, or visit the opera instead of the baseball stadium, or ride a bicycle to work. Chances are you’re not going to like these things as much as the stuff you already know and love, but you’ll still enjoy trying them, nevertheless, and—even more importantly—your companions will truly appreciate trying them with you.

If you feel that you have been potentially exposed to HIV and would like Free, Confidential and Anonymous testing call the Maui AIDS Foundation at 242-4900. It is important to know your HIV status so that you do not unknowingly pass the virus to others, also early detection is vital to your health and treatment. The Maui AIDS Foundation now offers Drop-In HIV Counseling and Testing (No appointment necessary) Drop in hours are Mon.-Fri. 8:30am to 4:30pm, Wed. 8:30am to 7pm 1935 Main Street, Wailuku For more information on HIV/AIDS, STD’s including Viral Hepatitis and HIV Counseling and Testing call the Maui AIDS Foundation at 242-4900. In Hana call 248-7801, Lanai 5656722, and Molokai 553-9086.

FAX NUMBER

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18)

808.661-0446

Not everyone is against you, even though you’re definitely not the most popular guy or gal around, at the moment. When the politics of the situation are so negative to someone of your views and tendencies, you have to choose, carefully, when to make a stand, and when to lie low and allow the brunt of the negativity to wash over you. This is one of those weeks where you’re best off hunkering down and, to some extent, hiding out. Let the hurricane winds blow over. It’s not that they’d blow you away—you’re too solid for that. But you could end up with a speck in your eye that you can’t get out for weeks.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20)

Sometimes you just have to take your punches. Resistance is useful, but not likely to be successful. In other words, prepare to fight the good fight but don’t be too traumatized when you get your ass kicked; you’re outnumbered, after all. I’m actually not too worried for you, although you do have my sympathies. The kind of friend who’ll show up when you’re battered, bruised and feeling sorry for yourself, ready to nurse you back to your strength and health, is the rarest and most special kind—and knowing just who that is, a rare and special kind of knowledge.

classifieds@mauitime.com

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19)

A public health message provided by The Maui AIDS Foundation.

MISCELLANEOUS HIGH POWER DIGITAL LIGHTING Now available for the first time on Maui. many commercial and agricultural applications. Call Ohana Greenhouse and Garden Supply @ 283-3427 to hear about this new technology. PREGNANT? Thinking ADOPTION? Talk with caring people specializing in matching birthmothers with loving families nationwide. EXPENSES PAID. Toll free 24/7 One True Gift Adoptions 866-921-0565. (AAN CAN)

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DINING

Hey, Stalky McObsessington. In general, you’re so resistant to emotional entanglement that when someone finally (and almost always accidentally and unintentionally) snares you in their net, you think you’re entitled to some kind of special treatment. It must be special—it’s fate, you declare, totally different from other people’s more common and frequent infatuations. Maybe it is, maybe not. In any case your love interest doesn’t have to (and probably doesn’t) see it that way. Thus the overzealous pursuit on your part. I know it’s hard—perhaps even impossible—but the next time this kind of passion strikes you, by all means go there, but be ready to bank those fires a bit if your potential partner burns less brightly, or more slowly.

TO ADVERTISE

573-1920

SURF

You’re like a bascule bridge between two major cities; most of the time you’re open to lots of traffic, sexual, mental or physical, but when a large boat—bearing as its cargo some kind of mental process—needs to pass underneath, you raise your span, and it could be months or years before anyone gets across again. This could be unnerving and frustrating for those on either side, who start honking their horns and risking dangerous U-turns. There’s no need for that kind of chaos, though. Please put a stop to it. Hint: Most people don’t mind waiting so much if they know how long their wait will be.

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21)

Jason Meyer

COVER STORY

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21)

MONDAY 4PM

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CLASSIFIEDS

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LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22)

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VACATION RENTALS

Some parts of you are ready to move on, but some aren’t. Perhaps your restless brain urges you forward, with logical arguments why you should. Nevertheless, it can’t completely overrule your heart, who lingers reluctantly behind out of sentimentality or unrequited love. Maybe your gut knows, in that way it has, that you need change and advancement, but it’s your nervous mind that’s holding you back, riddled with anxiety, worry and fear. In any case, because of these internal conflicts, transformation or movement may be slower than you wish, but don’t let it stall out. Make whatever concessions are required to get all the parts of you moving in the same direction, then hit the road.

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VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22)

CURBSIDE RECYCLING!

Surf the Maui MLS Listings at www.barrybrownmaui.com Barry Lee Brown (R)

BY CAERIEL CRESTIN

DAY&NIGHT

Drowning your sorrows would be a very bad idea right now. Booze probably won’t even provide the numbness you crave. In all likelihood, it’ll act like a lens on your troubles, making them seem much bigger than they are. And you certainly won’t be less daunted during a morning hangover. Better to keep a firm grip on your resolve and avoid self-medication. You can actually bring these minor quandaries to satisfactory conclusions if you just bite the bullet and get the necessary bits of unpleasantness over with. And of course, there’ll always be time for a celebratory drink afterwards, when you actually have occasion for it.

WEBSITE www.mauitime.com

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20) Doubt from inside yourself you’re used to. But when it comes from someone who you count on for more or less unconditional support, it stings. It feels like you’re five and Mom and Dad are telling you to give up your dreams of becoming an astronaut because they just don’t think you can do it, and they don’t want you to be disappointed. Parents like that have no excuse; they should know better. But the person who’s let you down might not know that her job is to always be on your side, no matter what—even when it means suppressing (or at least rewording) her own doubts. Clue her in. I don’t think it’s a job she’ll mind doing, once she knows that’s what you need.

MAILING 658 Front Street

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20) A first draft is allowed to be messy. In fact, it can be total shit. No one is ever going to see it, so who cares? You do, apparently, but I wish you wouldn’t. Your perfectionism is striking at the wrong time, demanding that you get everything right the first time around. It almost never works that way, though. What you’re actually doing is narrowing your creative channel so that it’s barely a trickle, and probably about to dry up completely. You’ve got to open the tap and let a flood come through. Later you can distill and filter that stuff until you get exactly the microbrew of delicious creativity you originally desired. Remember, it’s a process you’re aiming for at the moment, not a product.

#126A-7278 Lahaina, HI 96761

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22) I’m hungry. My stomach is growling as I write this sentence, but I’m ignoring its demands, as an example to you. Forget the instant gratification thing this week. Your desires will be coming upon you close and fast. If you’re set on seeking their immediate fulfillment, you won’t have a moment to rest, or to enjoy the occasional satisfactions that come your way. You’ve got to learn to live with your hunger, now and in general. The best part is, once you do get to eat after being hungry for a while, food tastes a whole lot better.

DROP OFF

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22) You have allies; they’re just not always obvious, or as quick to action as you are. In this case, your most important and useful aid-de-camp is someone with whom you often butt heads. In fact, recent conflicts may make them a bit slow or reluctant to come to your aid. But in the end, in this particular instance, you’re both on the same side and they will eventually have your back. In other words, don’t despair. Choose your spot and hold your ground, with dignity and honor. You won’t have to stand there alone for very long.

505 Front St. Ste. 216, Lahaina

CAERIEL@YAHOO.COM

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

HOLOHOLOGIRL

BY SAMANTHA CAMPOS

What the Hell Did I Do Last Thursday? It is possible that a certain amount of brain damage is of therapeutic value. – Dr. Paul Hoch I mean, here it is Tuesday—Thursday was only five days ago. Surely, I could remember what I did that day. It’s not like I’ve been doing a whole helluva lot this week or anything… “Whaddya mean?!” bellowed my editor from over my shoulder, on his routine check-up of what is filling my time since I never, ever seem to turn in my column at the appropriate deadline. “You did a lot this week, right? What about the hostess bar?” Well, yeah, okay—so I did haplessly check out that notorious scene one night. A friend and I had just wanted to get a quick drink in Wailuku somewhere, and it was late. Idini’s is usually our first stop of choice but we decided to cover some uncharted territory. We’d already been to Ray’s and Tiffany’s recently so they were out, too. Where else was there to go but Club Koa? Once we entered, it was like a saloon scene straight out of a classic spaghetti western. As soon as we opened the doors, time stopped. All eyes were on us. Cigarettes dangled from slack-jawed lips. Beer overflowed a glass that was being poured by the blank-staring barkeep. You could practically hear “The Ballad of High Noon” being whistled, as a tumbleweed rolled across the sawdust-covered floor. A somewhat nervous, dapper young man in shades, dressed head to toe in crisp white linen, greeted us. The gaze of patrons—generally middle-aged local men, flanked by younger, Asian women—followed us as our host escorted us quickly to the lounge area. As soon as we were seated, action resumed in the bar. Within seconds, we were served our beers by the white-clad man, who moved with such swiftness, such soundless speed, that we decided to call him “Dart.” And so we sat in our booth with the head-high walls, tucked way back in the corner of the bar, and we felt comfortably isolated. It was kinda romantic even. We couldn’t see anybody and they couldn’t see us—which led us to contemplate the potential for various salacious acts, the breadth and depth of which could only be encouraged by such enclosed isolation. At least, that was until we met “Jill-in-the-Box”—the seeming matron of the bar, who introduced herself to us by popping up over our booth’s walls and smiling knowingly yet sternly, as if to say, “Lookie here, cowpoke—these are the rules. Keep your guns on the table and no funny business. Order your brew and pay cash, if you know what’s good for ya.” And so we did. Once outside, we untied our horses and left. But anyway, that might’ve been Wednesday night—I don’t think it happened last Thursday. So what did? “Didn’t you go on some hike or something?” asked the editor, still impatiently tapping his foot behind my desk, waiting for copy to float magically over to his. Yes, that’s right. Sasha and I did go on a hike with another friend through a lava tube in Ulupalakua. Once we were deep inside the caves, we turned off our headlamps and stood in absolute darkness for a few minutes. It was unnerving, humbling and enlightening—sensory deprivation is so… well, sensual! Afterward, we went to the Stopwatch in Makawao, where a friendly bar patron, unabashedly enamored of Sasha, offered to take us all on a three-day tour. But that was a couple Saturdays ago. “What about a party?” my editor again prompted, unwaveringly. “I’m sure you went to some party somewhere… didn’t you?” Sure. Of course, I did. But that was just a little shindig at Baldwin Beach for our pals Dave and Kristen, formerly of the SandBar, who’re heading back to the mainland. It was a lovely night, what with the full moon, the beers, the food, catching up with old friends, meeting new ones and making sure not to look up while using the public restroom at the beach park. But again, that was Friday—not Thursday. Oh, yeah—and then there was that Fry Party we went to with Paul, just around the corner from Café Marc Aurel. And then a large group of us hung out at the Café with Dr. Mingle himself, as we drank bottle after bottle of fortified grape juice (that’s wine, people) and Paul regaled us with naughty jokes involving horses and midgets. Ah… always good times there. But that was last Saturday. Thursday, Thursday… Oh, wait! I’ve got it! That was the day I taught a chimp how to fire up a Zippo lighter. Samantha Campos has released three albums of Algerian folk-rock that went mega-platinum in Liechtenstein. MTW

AUGUST 25, 2005

CLASSIFIED

, Rock n Roll , Like you Haven t Heard in a While Fridays 7pm until Midnight

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LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

AUGUST 25, 2005

PAYDAY LOANS - CASH LOAN NOW

CASH ON THE SPOT

$ - $300 INSTANT LOANS $ - PAY CHECK LOAN ADVANCES $ - WE’LL HOLD YOUR CHECK

No credit check • No amount too large Insured & Licensed Pawn Broker DIAMONDS • JEWELRY • GOLD • FINE WATCHES COINS • BULLION • MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS COMPUTERS • COLLECTABLES

NEED MONEY! Come in or call NOW! •

46 North Market Street, Wailuku

kcab

edis

We sell for you on EBAY! Web Auctions Hawaii 242-4567

Or do your loan online at: www.paycheckloan.com

Dr. Robert Ley Comprehensive Pain Management

Home Based Business $100K Part Time www.xscash.biz

HIGH VISIBILITY! LOW COSTS! BACK SIDE CLASSIFIEDS WORK!

Spinal Trauma and Orthopedic Injuries Automobile and Occupational Injuries Chronic Neck and Back Pain Shoulder, Knee, and Hip Pain Accepting most insurance plans, including

HMSA, UHA, Tri-West, No Fault, Work Comp

CALL (808) 661-3786 for complete details!

Located in Kukui Mall

1819 S. Kihei Rd. Suite D-101, Kihei 874-5141

VIAGRA

LOOKING FOR COLLECTABLE OLD COINS?

VIAGRA - $2.40/dose - CIALIS available Lowest price refills Guaranteed! Call PBG we can help! Non Profit Organization Toll free: 1-866-887-7283 (AAN CAN)

Maui’s mobile Pawn Shop First National Pawn 877-0676

Payday Loans Cash Loan Now, $300 Instant , & Pay check loan advances. Kamaaina Loan 242-5555

HIGHEST CASH DOLLARS for your cameras, ukuleles, big diamonds, fine watches, Hawaiiana, musical instruments, fine jewelry, & gold. Kamaaina Loan 242-5555

We’ve got Maui’s Best Selection and Lowest Prices. Also Collectable Old Stamps, Sports Memorabilia and Flags From Around the World. Island Coins & Stamps, Wharf Cinema Center, 3rd Floor, Lahaina, 667-6155l

Air Maui Helicopter Tours 2 for 1 Special! West Maui/Molokai Special. Only Air Maui offers this incredible flight! Call now for your 2 for 1 Kama’aina special or special visitor rate! Expires Dec. 31, 2005. For reservations call 877-7005

Sweet Life Fruit Company Gift Baskets, Fruit Baskets & Flowers FISHING ACTION!

STOP WISHIN’ & GO FISHIN’ 42’ BERTRAM SPORTFISHERS

RATED #1

Maui: (808) 667-2774 www.JoshJerman.com

KONA: (808) 327-1265

TOLL FREE 1-800-590-0133

Delivered on Maui or shipped worldwide. Sweet Life Fruit Co. 808-27SWEET (277-9338) or (6629338) www.mauifruitbasket.com

I’ao Acupuncture & Spa! Amazing Acu-Facial: A highly effective facial consisting of Acupuncture, a green tea extract wash, an herbal plaster mask, topped with a pearl powder aloe moisturizer. Don’t wait...call now: 249-8280

Burton Feinerman, M.D. Cosmetic Dermatology •Anti-Aging Medicine •Weight Loss Program That Works •PPC Injections To Dissolve Fat Safely •Contour and Shape Your Body •Botox-Collagen-Restylane Wrinkle Fillers •Foto Facial IPL Wrinkles, Brown Spots •Chemical Peels Safe; No Down Time •New Acne Scar Treatment With Levulan/IPL •IPL Hair Removal •HGH-Testosterone Female Bioidentical Hormones

874-5141 1819 S. Kihei Road Kukui Mall, Kihei www.anti-agingmedicine.com

BRAZILIAN GIRLS PERFORMING LIVE ON MAUI! Come check out the Brazilian Girls from NYC Live at Hapas Friday August 26th and Saturday August 27th. Also performing two shows at Casanova Thursday August 25th aat 9:15pm and 12:00am. Tickets onsale at HulaTickets.com, Hapas Kihei (879.9001), Paia Wine Corner, Beach Road Records Kihei, The New Enchantress Boutique (Shops at Wailea), Live Wire Cafe' Front St. Lahaina, Requests Music Wailuku and Casanova’s Deli.

MASSAGE & FACIALS

35Acupuncture

ACUPUNCTURE PRICES VALID THRU AUGUST 2005

7 DAYS A WEEK

BLUE BAMBOO Chinese Medical Center & Spa

244-6778 2099 Wells St., Wailuku

MAE#5293

242-5555