07.40 Maui-Oahu Sub Train Tunnel, April 1, 2004, Volume 7, Issue 40, MauiTime

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APRIL 1

2004

VOLUME 7

ISSUE 40

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5 SELLING RELATIONSHIPS

An evening at Montblanc

17 BAABA MAAL

From Africa, with love

30 HOLOHOLO GIRL

Sort of takes a break

the

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Is the state serious about a Maui-Oahu tunnel?

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APRIL 1, 2004

CONTENTS

Come to Your PaiaFish Market Tides &times Senses!

VOLUME 7 • ISSUE 40

Restaurant

COVER STORY 10 The Sub Train

Tide-times set for Honolulu - adjust as follows: Kahului - 1hr 41min. Hana - 1hr 23 min.

Makena - 0hr 32min. Kihei/Ma`alaea - 0hr 22 min. Lahaina - 0hr 40 min.

Is the state serious about a Maui-Oahu tunnel?

by Anthony Pignataro

1 Sun R 6:24A Thur Sun S 6:46P

LOCAL NEWS 5 Selling Relationships 8 How Not to Make Peace

Come to

An evening at the Montblanc boutique

by Anthony Pignataro

Encore!

Can we please have a new U.S. foreign policy?

by Joshua Cooper

OP ED 9 First They Came for the Shock Jocks The censoring of Howard Stern

by Ted Rall

“I’m lovin’ it!” - P. 12

Quality Consignment Boutique

form

DEPARTMENTS

DINING 12 Evilly Delicious!

3 TIDES & TIMES 4 EH BRAH! 5 LC WATCH

FILM CRITIQUE 18 Screening Short

7 NEWS OF THE WEIRD

6 COCONUT WIRELESS

Baaba Maal comes to the MACC

by Samantha Campos

6 OVERHEARD...

23 PURE VOLUME

DAY&NIGHT 19 Movie Capsules & Times 20 this week’s picks 21 Da Kine Calendar 22 The Grid

DKL

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27 PERSONALS 28 CLASSIFIED LISTINGS 29 KOZMIC BREEZE

It may not make sense, but it’s true.

We’d like NOTHING better than to sit down with you and go over your W-2’s and 1099’s and other tax information.

Then you can go home and we’ll get down to the fun stuff. email:

30 HOLOHOLO GIRL

Web:

Editor: Anthony Pignataro anthony@mauitime.com

Production Assistants: Debbie Belle, Wendy Higa

Associate Editor: Samantha Campos sam@mauitime.com

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BOUNTY MUSIC q SPRING CLEARANCE ; MauiTime Weekly is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright © 2004 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. Maui Time Weekly may be distributed only by MauiTime Weekly’s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime Weekly is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime Weekly, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime Weekly are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime Weekly.

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Important!

A&E 17 From Africa, with Love

Contributing Writers: Joshua Cooper, Koz McKev, Ted Rall, Chuck Shepherd, Cole Smithey

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APRIL 1, 2004

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NEWCOLUMN!

BY THE EDITOR

From The Editor On Journalistic Integrity

www.honoluasurf.com

(888) HONOLUA

Journalism is taking a real beating these days. Former New York Times reporter Jayson Blair—disgraced for repeated lying about his reporting, sources and events in stories—is hawking his sob story on a book tour. His former Times colleague Rick Bragg, admitted to putting his byline over the reporting of unpaid stringers but saw no problem in accepting an award from the University of Alabama School of Journalism. USA Today is only now coming to grips with years of phony work put out by its star foreign correspondent Jack Kelley.

Many journalistic “experts” talk about ethics, but I want you, our loyal readers, to know that I, The Editor, take ethics seriously. So you can imagine the gamut of emotions presented to me when I discovered the website www.cheerleaderninjas.com.

I forget exactly how I found it. I think I was scanning Wall St. Journal editorials and accidentally clicked on a banner ad.

Anyway, it’s not important. What is important is that this site immediately tested my entire ethical foundation.

“Press: Click here to get your press kit!” blared one link at the bottom of the www.cheerleaderninjas.com homepage. “If you’re a member of the press who wants to see a screener and press kit, please email us,” said the new page. “We’ll hook ya up!”

Now some journalists and editors might pause at such crossroads. Not I. As The Editor, I understand the solemn obligations placed in my trust. That’s why I clicked on the link.

Journalistic integrity demanded my clicking on the link. After all, I am The Editor. I had no choice. As a “member of the press,” I had to request a press kit and screener DVD copy. I had to watch Cheerleader Ninjas from start to finish, without fast-forwarding

Ethics is a grim business between the “good parts.”

Would H. L. Mencken have done differently? Edward R. Murrow? Clark Kent? I doubt it.

Cheerleader Ninjas is a movie about cheerleader ninjas who sometimes take off their clothes. It stars Kira Reed as Fantasy Girl, Crystal Mikel as The Head Church Lady, Blake Martin as Little Billy and screenwriter/director Kevin Campbell as Your Narrator/Dog-humping Boy. “It was loads of creamy fun,” said actress/real-life Miami Dolphins cheerleader Renee Deemer, who portrays Heather, in one press release. “I mean, we got lots of great dessert, and all the guys wanted to put whip[ped] cream on top of my brownie! What a bunch of sweethearts.”

Another release quoted Fantasy Girl Reed.

“I love being naked,” said Reed, who the press kit listed as previously starring in “The Playboy Channel.” “It’s my natural state.”

So you see? Journalistic ethics is grim business, sure, but when tested, you can be certain The Editor did not hesitate.

Next week The Editor wrestles with the dilemma of how to deduct a DVD he didn’t purchase from his income taxes. MTW

EH BRAH! Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less, changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent to “Eh Brah!” c/o Maui Time Weekly, 658 Front Street, Ste. 126A–7278, Lahaina, HI 96761 or send an e-mail to

ehbrah@mauitime.com Where’s your MANA?! Do you “proud Hawaiians” even know how far away Jamaica is from Hawaii? Your grandparents would be ashamed to hear what you have done to their beautiful Hawaiian music. They taught you how to play music and pass it down, only to have you musicians play music from JAMAICA! Where is your mana? Better yet, where is your honor? Written on dollar bills, no doubt. Bob Marley would be ashamed! Instead of standing up for your rights you’d rather sit down and get stoned. Pretty soon you’ll be rapping, acting and speaking in ebonics. Proud Hawaiian? Go ahead and give your money to corporate America for cigarettes and beer, give away your land to the rich and let your Hawaiian culture die. The blood of my ancestors flows down the mountainsides of Hawaii, not Jamaica. You are not proud Hawaiians and you know it’s true. Your ancestors look down in shame at your lack of honor and your disrespect for the proud Hawaiian culture.

Teach your children the truth. Where is YOUR mana, proud Hawaiian?

4

APRIL 1, 2004

NEWS

LOCALNEWS

BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO

Selling Relationships

hand-written with Montblanc pens.

“We wanted to send engraved, wax-sealed invitations,” said Abernathy. “But the post office suggested we not go that route. They said they would get hung up [in the sorting machine].” So Abernathy had many of the invitations delivered personally.

As people began arriving around 6 p.m. and started sipping Veuve Cliequot champagne and nibbling on bruscetta and crackers topped with chopped eggplant provided by Capische?

Restaurant, Abernathy and her associates walked through the boutique, showing off “lifestyle accessories” that could be matched and coordinated to different pens and mechanical pencils. Accessories like new colored leather purses, belts, wallets, cuff links, money clips, cigar-cutters and wine stoppers.

“We have a few items that if you have everything else, you might like,” said Abernathy to one customer admiring a thick metal ring that fits around the neck of a wine bottle to catch drips.

As the Capische? crew popped open a forth bottle of champagne and the boutique sales associates donned white gloves and began carrying around the special items, offering them to guests to hold and examine with magnifying glasses, the boutique began buzzing with conversation.

“This guy here just bought a hotel in Reno,” said one man.

“I gave him a little over three acres on the Big Island,” said another.

Everybody who attended received a gift bag containing Montblanc notecards, samples of new Montblanc fragrances Presence (pronounced presahhnce) and Individuel, a CD of Mozart music and a bottle of Sparkling Voss, the “artesian water from Norway.”

“That emblem sells itself,” Abernathy had told me shortly before the event began. “We sell relationships.” MTW

An evening at the Montblanc boutique Last week Fred Schwettmann and his wife drove from their Ka’anapali home all the way to Wailea to buy a pen. A fountain pen, actually. A fountain pen made of black precious resin and white gold with an 18 carat gold nib and four diamonds mounted on the clip. The clip looks like an orchestra conductor’s baton because the pen itself was one of 95 made to honor the great conductor Herbert von Karajan’s 95th birthday.

The pen, made by Montblanc, cost Schwettmann $11,000. He put it on his Visa card.

“I like the looks, the appearance,” said the retired electronics company owner while a sales associate placed his pen in a special Montblanc limited edition gift bag.

“I have quite a few pens like it, and I use them all the time. I use them mostly for writing in journals. I like to switch every week, use a different pen. My favorite is the Han Wu Di. It’s beautiful and simple, with interesting Chinese characters and embossed with the Han emperor, who ruled China in 30 or so BC. He spent large amounts of money rebuilding the Great Wall but he bankrupted the country.”

The Karanjan pen Schwettman purchased made its North American debut at a special “event” held Wednesday, Mar. 24 at the Wailea Montblanc boutique.

The event was a thank-you gift for “special collectors,” full-time Maui residents who have made repeated purchases at the store.

Four items including the Karanjan pen appeared at the show. The most expensive was the new White House fountain pen.

Made from blue resin, the pen had a skeleton body that shows the pen’s inner mechanics, an engraved eagle’s head with blue sapphire eyes, an Oval Office-shaped cap base and an engraving of the U.S. Seal on the nib. Because there have been 43 U.S. Presidents, Montblanc made 43 pens.

The boutique had one to display during the show—Number 29, the “Warren G. Harding” model, since he was America’s 29th president.

“It has a retail value of $20,000,” said boutique manager Leisa Abernathy.

The Montblanc name is famous around the world for expensive, jewel-encrusted fountain and ballpoint pens. Its catalog is filled with limited editions, paying homage to men like Alexander the Great, Andrew Carnegie and chronometer inventor John Harrison.

And, interestingly enough, F. Scott Fitzgerald.

“Although Fitzgerald enjoyed the highsociety life,” notes the current Montblanc

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special editions catalog, “in his outstanding works such as The Great Gatsby and This Side of Paradise he drew a subtle psychological portrait of the hedonistic America of the 1920s, which allowed the inescapable tragedy beneath the glittering surface to show through.”

There were about 20 guests at the Wailea store, mostly older couples, often wearing thick gold bracelets and large rings studded with giant gems. All had received invitations

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LCNoWatch Respect Nobody ever said it was easy being the Maui County Department of Liquor Control.

You never know what people in bars—or bar owners, for that matter—will do.

“I’ll take your fucking Liquor Board and stick it up your ass,” the owner of nowclosed Canelli’s on the Beach allegedly told two LC officers who showed up at his establishment to investigate “anonymous charges” a few years ago.

More recently, the LC ran into a little “disrespect” at Henry’s Bar and Grill in Kihei. The alleged perp? Owner David Henry Sarandria himself.

“O.K., everyone up against the wall!”

Sarandria allegedly yelled at LC Officer David Olsten when he entered Henry’s at 2:05 in the a.m. last Halloween.

“We’re screwed!”

Olsten entered Henry’s at 2:05, he later reported, to find out why he could enter Henry’s at 2:05—it being a whole entire five minutes beyond the LC-mandated closing hour of 2:00 and all.

Olsten reported that he saw Sarandria taking a drink. Sarandria countered he was merely “smelling the contents” of the glass. It didn’t help Sarandria’s case when, after Olsten stepped outside for a moment, he allegedly locked the door and sent his employees home.

Six violations later, Sarandria didn’t show to the Mar. 4, 2004 Liquor Adjudication Board hearing on his violations, but sent one of his associates and his attorney— State Land Use Commission Chairman Lawrence Ing—to plead No Contest in his place.

“I’m a little bit upset,” said Board Member Ron McOmber. “She reading a statement is not enough. It’s a little bit of a slap in the face of this board. We have a credibility problem.”

On the night in question, Sarandria was “loud and obnoxious,” “uncooperative” and showed “blatant and willful disrespect,” said Deputy DA Angela Hedge. “You’re supposed to follow the rules… He needs to respect the Commission.”

And with that, they fined him $4,000. Nobody said respect was cheap, either.

—Anthony Pignataro

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LOCALNEWS MONDAY, MAR. 22 What was that book called that predicted how the government would eventually become this all-powerful force of dictatorial rule over most of the planet and would watch everybody all the time from hidden cameras? Oh yeah, it was The Wizard of Oz. Maybe… Someone here thinks it might have been 1984, but wasn’t that a John Belushi movie? Anyway, I think the state legislature is using whatever book it was as a policy handbook. Seems all-knowing, allseeing traffic cameras are coming to an intersection near you. A couple legislative committees holding identical memberships—Traffic and Public Safety—gave them the seal of approval today. Just one representative seemed to think this was a bad idea, and he didn’t sit on the committees. “[This] will basically make everyone subject to these photographs by these cameras,” said Rep. Kika Bukowski (R, Pukalani-Ulapalakua). “We’re going to be living in a fishbowl.” Supporters cited a recent accident on Oahu’s H-1 that killed four and injured two as reason to allow counties to install cameras. And whom do we have to thank for this great leap forward in democracy, this wonderful attempt to make Hawaii as paranoid as any mainland big city? That would be our very own Rep. Joe Souki, (D, Waihee-Wailuku).

TUESDAY, MAR. 23 Boy, the Maui Land and Pineapple Company is pushing fast on their proposed Pulelehua residential project. So fast that, according to a Maui News story on a recent public gathering hosted by ML&P, company officials can’t even say for certain what they’re unveiling. “In fact, [vice president Bob] McNatt said Friday, he and his staff

BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO

had gotten their topographical maps only the day before,” reported Harry Eagar, “and he was not even sure exactly how many acres are included in phase one of Puleluhua.” …Some said the County Council Land Use Committee was going to vote on Makena today, but nope.

They took testimony and argued all last week, but they’re not ready to vote. And this, naturally, is a good thing. Vote tomorrow, vote next week—hell, why mess up what could be a tense electoral cycle? Vote next year! Take all the time you want.

The wheels of democracy were meant to turn slowly for a reason.

COCONUT WIRELESS THE WEEK IN REVIEW

WEDNESDAY, MAR. 24 What is this, Crush Civil Liberties in Hawaii Week? Now The Associated Press—picked up by today’s Maui News—is reporting that the state legislature is “expediting the process of charging felony suspects.”

Now I don’t know about you, but I cringe when I see the word “expediting” used to describe the intentions of legislators concerning justice matters. Since when is justice subject to cost-benefit pressures? Briefly, the House Judicial Committee is calling for a state constitutional amendment that would all but eliminate any pretrial hearing for suspects facing trial. Right now, suspects can face the witnesses and evidence against them in open court before they ever get to trial. But if the Committee gets its way, all that would be eliminated in favor of simply having prosecutors give judges “witness statements and police reports” and then letting him or her decide whether to hold a trial. How positively speedy. Almost as fast as them trials they used to hold in the Soviet Union way back when. Hey—I’m just saying.

THURSDAY, MAR. 25 For those keeping track at home using your official Makena Madness brackets, the

OVERHEARD...

“YOU KNOW WHAT I’M AFRAID OF? TAKING A SHOWER, BECAUSE I’M AFRAID THE SHOWER HEAD’S GONNA TEAR MY SKIN OFF.” -Woman to her friends, walking through the Shops at Wailea, Mar. 24

Maui County Land Use Committee didn’t vote on Makena today. If they’re smart, they’ll delay pushing this one through just a wee bit longer. Next January good for you?

FRIDAY, MAR. 26 Your Maui News—specifically reporter Harry Eagar—does a spread on the Maui Land & Pineapple Company’s plan to close down its Kahului Cannery and fire lots of people. It’s so huge and fawning you’d think ML&P founder J. Walter Cameron still owned the paper. In none of Eagar’s three (3) stories on the company that currently holds a whopping four percent of the world’s pineapple market does he actually report that ML&P will sack a lot of people, but he does strongly hint at it with words and phrases like “candid assessment,” “deemphasized,” “conversion” and “the old Kahului cannery—the last remaining pineapple cannery in the United States—will be closed.” In any case, the company wants to be less of a pineapple

cannery and more of a “boutique grower,” specializing in more of your elitist varieties of fruits like… pineapple, as well as put even more homes and condos on all that old farm land…

Speaking of which, today is the late Joseph Campbell’s 100th birthday. For those of you who don’t watch Public Broadcasting on a semi-regular basis, Campbell was a genius who spent his life studying and teaching the world’s mythologies. You know, myths—Jason and the Argonauts, Earth was created in six days, George W. Bush is an educated man.

SATURDAY, MAR. 27 Rounding out “Crush Civil Liberties in Hawaii Week” is a staff editorial in today’s Maui News titled “Cameras might impede speeding.”

The unsigned opinion piece makes perfectly clear that… excuse me—“might?” Cameras mounted at traffic intersections “might” do any number of things—photograph speeders, scare innocents, hold birds’ nests. Usually, editorialists use their precious space to tell readers what “will” or “should” happen. In any case, the editorial is part unfunny humor and creepy apology for authoritarian government. “If Big Brother is looking only for lawbreakers,” states the opinion piece, “the rest of the public has nothing to fear and the fines collected by the system could offset the cost of installing and maintaining the cameras.”

SUNDAY, MAR. 28 It’s unknown whether the 23,000 members of the Hawaii Government Employees Association—the union that organizes state workers—will get the two-year contract and four percent raises each year that it wants. There’s a lot of opposition, most notably Governor Linda Lingle. She says the state can’t afford it. Though she seems not totally against government pay raises—especially where her own people are concerned. In fact, Lingle says the department heads need raises more because they haven’t gotten any in a while. “I feel 14 years without an increase for the directors of the state’s departments is not right,” she told the AP. Of course, she’s speaking of the position itself not getting a raise in 14 years—the department heads were all appointees who’ve only been in office a couple years. And they say Democrats like to waffle.

MTW

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APRIL 1, 2004

NEWS

NEWSOFTHEWEIRD JIMINY CRICKET! Adding to the Disney-fanatic adults who have appeared in “News of the Weird” is George Reiger of Bethlehem, Pa., who has now been tattooed with Disney-related images 1,600 times, adding about one per week. Reiger said he spends $50,000 a year on his Disney habit, owns 19,000 items of memorabilia, and has fitted his house with Disney touches. In February, Reuters news service asked his opinion of chairman Michael Eisner and of potential Disney owner Comcast Corp., both of which Reiger denounced as indifferent to the original Disney magic. “A lot of people ask me,” Reiger said, “if I got (a tattoo of Eisner), where would I put it?”

LEAST COMPETENT GOOD OL’ BOYS In December, on their second try, six men managed to set fire to a cross in the yard of a Dade County, Ga., white woman whose daughter was dating a biracial man, but then they couldn’t control the flames, which threatened an “innocent” white neighbor, provoking one of the men to call 911, leading eventually to their arrests.

The county, in Georgia’s northwest corner, is known as the “state of Dade” for its isolation and insularity (99.4 percent white), but Sheriff Philip Street did bring himself to denounce cross burning as “old school.”

LIFE IMITATES CHRISTINE On Jan. 30, as Angel Eck, 20, drove her Pontiac Sunfire on Interstate 70 toward Denver, she suddenly could not slow down. The car was locked in overdrive and climbed to 100 mph. The ignition would not disengage and the clutch and accelerator were stuck. A half-hour later, two enterprising Denver police officers, having been alerted by cell phone

BY CHUCK SHEPHERD

and reprising a tactic from the old CHiPs TV show, slowed the car by allowing it to repeatedly bump the rear of their squad car until it came to a stop. A few days later, idling in the shop at Green Mountain Auto Service, the car jumped gears and pinned a mechanic against an inside wall until a colleague set the emergency brake.

LATEST RELIGIOUS MESSAGE Separation of Church and Clinic: At a November hearing on Thomas DeVol’s business practices, Missouri’s State Committee of Psychologists also heard evidence that the marriage counselor had described himself as a “Christian psychologist” who estimated that, during his 20-year practice, about 150 of his clients were possessed by demons and other “evil spirits.” (The committee was still deliberating DeVol’s fate at press time.)

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D A Y S !

BRIGHT IDEAS Mile High Outfitters, a backcountry expedition organizer in Challis, Idaho, has petitioned the U.S. Forest Service for permission to install three commercial, recreational hot tubs smack in the middle of an unspoiled wilderness area, and the service is now considering the proposal (the public comment period having ended early this month). Each tub would require 1,250 gallons of water, heated by wood-burning stove, replenished every three days in-season, even though motorized vehicles to bring the water in are not now permitted.

LEAST COMPETENT CRIMINALS At his trial in November for stealing the equivalent of $150,000 worth of jewelry from a house, Daniel Dady, 20, offered the defense of lack of motive, in that he had just inherited the equivalent of $30,000 and did not need more. The jury found him guilty anyway.

PRO

Marijuana Same Sex Marriage Choice YOU

The days of spending money to prosecute a guy for smoking a joint, rather than putting that money towards fixing some kid’s teeth, needs to end. And the government should have no place in telling you who you can fall in love with.

It’s time we had a new modern vision for Hawaii, and it’s time to put the power back in your hands, not in the hands of the drug companies.

Brian Evans Paid for by Brian Evans for United States Senator www.brianforsenator.com <http://www.brianforsenator.com>

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Come Experience

LOCALNEWS

How Not to Make Peace Can we please have a new U.S. foreign policy?

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APRIL 1, 2004

NEWS

BY JOSHUA COOPER

This is “blowback” Political scientists often describe U.S. foreign policy as that of a drunk walking down the street. Ever watch a drunk try to walk down the street? He stumbles from light pole to light pole, careening this way and that, sometimes falling, sometimes running, sometimes walking backwards. He has no real direction or consistency. He just moves in whichever way happens to be most expeditious at that particular moment.

Often the drunk walking down the street will start cavorting with unsavory characters. That leads to another term political scientists use to characterize U.S. foreign policy: blowback. That is simply the consequence or consequences that suddenly spring up long after that drunken cavorting.

U.S. foreign policy decisions over the last six decades have resulted in blowback on a biblical scale, as well as the needless deaths of thousands of Americans. For instance, the current focus on Saddam Hussein as a priority is radically at odds with the American view from the Ronald Reagan Administration.

Back then the U.S. provided the tools for his reign of torture—including taxpayer-funded military assistance and expedited transfers of pesticides, which were later used in the chemical weapons he used to kill Kurds and Iranians. Back then, current Secretary of Defense Don Rumsfeld even acted as special envoy to Baghdad, meeting with Saddam to see if everything was going smoothly.

The reason for the U.S. assistance was our antipathy towards Iran due to their hostage taking at the U.S. Embassy for 444 days. Of course, we had forgotten the U.S. role in the overthrow of the Iranian government back in 1954, but they didn’t.

Like Saddam, the hated and feared Osama bin Laden was also once our friend. In fact, the CIA provided training and assistance to bin Laden and other radically antiAmerican Mujahadin in the 1980s in Afghanistan in their war against communism practiced by the Soviets who’d invaded the country in 1979. Only back then, we didn’t call him a “terrorist”—we called him and his troops “freedom fighters.”

Clearly, this manner of conducting foreign policy hasn’t been as successful as we’d like to believe. As citizens, we must read and know history so we can demand a foreign policy that meshes with our beliefs in freedom and democracy and doesn’t turn us into a fiend bent on death and domination of the world’s resources.

The pursuit of profit in the name of gross national product must also explore its value in the world and its purpose in relation to people.

The U.S. must produce more than landmines, rockets, small arms, stealth planes and mortars. In the rockets fired and bombs exploded, the future rounds of murder and mayhem will detonate on humanity. Iraq and Afghanistan are both further from peace than this same moment last year.

The U.S. is hardly alone in this practice.

Look at Israel. They’ve been hunting Hamas leaders in the name of extra judicial executions.

This week they fired a rocket at the leader, blowing him and his wheelchair into bits and pieces. Yet, the effect has not been what those who pulled the trigger want. There is not more safety and security, but instead hundreds of thousands in the street ready to retaliate.

A rocket exploding in the chest of a wheelchair-bound man is a poor substitute for a peace plan. More bombing produces nothing other than more bombing. Israel says it will do this again and again and even announced more names on its assassination list, including PLO leader Yassar Arafat.

The hope for humanity rests with nothing less than guarantees everywhere of human rights for all. The work of protecting the rights of all people on every continent rests with states willing to dedicate their natural resources to the goals of ridding the world of war and providing the basic needs for all humanity based on dignity and respect.

MTW

OPED

Pleasant Island Holidays

BY TED RALL

First They Came for the Shock Jocks The censoring of Howard Stern During the 1950s, actors and screenwriters sympathetic to progressive causes found it nearly impossible to get work.

Though they couldn’t prove it, blackballed Hollywood talent knew why their telephones had stopped ringing. Somewhere behind the scenes, someone powerful, someone who believed that America was composed only of communists and rightthinking souls like themselves, was working to silence them.

We tell our kids that America learned from McCarthyism, but the Red Scare has been revised for a new century.

Powerbrokers connected to what Hillary Clinton clumsily called the “vast right-wing conspiracy”—the Bush-Cheney’s neoconservative war profiteers, the Christian Right and their media allies at Fox News

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Stern’s show blew right through it,” Clear Channel Radio president John Hogan said before dropping Stern’s popular syndicated program—Clear Channel is willing to lose money to promote its political agenda—from its stations.

Citing three separate FCC sources, Stern says he expects to be hit by a huge fine, then fired. “It’s over for me as a broadcaster,” he said recently. “I’m checkmated. All they gotta do is fine [Infinity Broadcasting, Stern’s employer] and then we’re gone. And there’s nothing we can do about it.” On March 5, he added: “I’m guessing that sometime next week will be my last show on this station. There’s a cultural war going on. The religious right is winning. We’re losing.”

If Clear Channel truly had a true zero tolerance policy on decency, Stern points out, it

“I’M GUESSING THAT SOMETIME NEXT WEEK WILL BE MY LAST SHOW ON THIS STATION. THERE’S A CULTURAL WAR GOING ON. THE RELIGIOUS RIGHT IS WINNING. WE’RE LOSING.”

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Front Street’s and Clear Channel Communications— operate out in the open. Their goal: to crush personalities whose influence and eloquence threatens their plan to recast the United States in their white, heterosexual, pro-business image.

Ironically two of the hard right’s recent high-profile speech martyrs, Bill Maher and Howard Stern, are libertarians—a group whose distrust of big government traditionally prompts them to vote Republican. ABC, a subsidiary of the Walt Disney Company—a major political contributor to Bush’s 2000 presidential campaign and other Republicans—canceled Maher’s Politically Incorrect TV show after 9/11.

Now, over on AM radio, the Bush-controlled Federal Communications Commission has targeted Howard Stern for trumped-up decency violations. In a classic tag-team move, Clear Channel Communications, the thousand-stationplus behemoth so closely allied with the White House that it organized pro-Bush “Rallies for America” during the run-up to the invasion of Iraq, declared Stern in violation of a brand-new “zero tolerance” policy for on-air indecency.

“Clear Channel drew a line in the sand today with regard to protecting our listeners from indecent content, and Howard

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wouldn’t have hired foul-mouthed right-wing Republican Michael Savage at its KPRC-AM in Houston. (Savage infamously shouted that homosexuals should “get AIDS and die” on MSNBC.) The real reason he’s being attacked, Stern says, is that he dared criticize George W. Bush.

“If you don’ t think me going after Bush got me thrown off those stations, you got another thing coming,” says the “shock jock.” “My days here are numbered because I dared to speak out against the Bush administration and say that the religious agenda of George W. Bush concerning stem cell research and gay marriage is wrong. And that what he is doing with the FCC is pushing this religious agenda. And also the fact that the guy takes more vacation than any President ever... I don’t think we can stop it, short of me calling up President Bush and saying ‘Look man, I’m going to support you, so don’t do this.’”

The Right is running scared. Their wars and economic schemes turned out to be as fraudulent as their fake president, whose poll numbers are plummeting as he turns to face uncharacteristically unified Democrats.

Because they have no record worth defending and no ideas anyone will believe, the new McCarthyites have only one line of defense left: censoring their opponents. The question this time is, will anyone stand up for free speech? MTW

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

APRIL 1, 2004

9

the

sub

An entirely new meaning to the word “subway” The waves are flat and the beach is empty, except for one guy standing on some rocks at Baldwin Beach in Paia, overlooking a crumbling army pillbox from World War II. It had rained earlier in the day, and the air was still moist. The guy is just a few feet from the old pillbox, yet he doesn’t seem to see the dilapidated structure. Instead, he’s staring over it at the ocean beyond.

“That’s where the main spar will jut in,” the guy said, throwing his right arm straight out. “She’ll come straight in, then veer over there towards the airport. The geography isn’t perfect, but it’s doable. No question it’s doable.”

The guy is Jack Moffett, the president and chief engineer of Moffett & Associates, a small engineering firm based in La Jolla, California—not far from the University of California, San Diego. But there’s nothing small about Moffett’s plans for Hawaii.

For the last few weeks, Moffett has been meeting quietly with state and federal officials, mostly in Honolulu, but lately here on Maui as well. Their subject matter: How to construct a road and rail line that would link the four main islands of the Hawaiian chain.

For the past few decades, the only way to get from

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APRIL 1, 2004

COVER STORY

island to island has been by air. There’s talk today of an inter-island ferry service—the Spirit of Ontario I, which is slightly smaller than the proposed “Superferry,” even docked in Kahului Harbor a few weeks ago to show off for invited guests.

But Moffett, who said he’s been working on the plan for the last four years, believes he has a better idea. He proposes to lay hundreds of miles of tunnels in the water between the islands. Similar in design to the “Chunnel” that crosses the English Channel, linking the United Kingdom and France, Moffett’s tunnels would consist of two fast rail lines and a smaller service/escape tunnel in between. People would ride in passenger trains or load their cars on flatbed train cars.

The whole system could even include inter-island oil, water and power lines.

“Right now the only way to get from Maui to Oahu is by airplane,” said Moffett. “That is absolutely ridiculous, considering that the distance from Maui to Oahu is just 120 miles.”

Just 120 miles. That’s the distance from Los Angeles to Santa Barbara. And that’s just Maui-Oahu.

ARTIST RENDITION COURTESY / MOFFETT & ASSOCIATES

train Connecting Kauai and the Big Island would add 240 additional miles to the network.

Never mind that the longest tunnel in the world is just a little over 33 miles long. Or that a recently proposed tunnel running beneath the Strait of Gibraltar that would connect the continents of Africa and Europe would run less than 25 miles.

Yet Moffett’s plan isn’t as long as a proposed 140 mile-long tunnel connecting the Japanese home islands with the Korean peninsula. That tunnel would also involve a three-tube design. And it isn’t even close to a theoretic immersed, floating tunnel discussed on a recent Discovery Channel program as well as CNN running the 3,000 miles between New York and London.

Nonetheless, the problems with Moffett’s proposal are almost too numerous to catalog. How do you keep an underwater tunnel of that length sealed? How do you get travelers out should something go wrong? How do you keep people driving that distance not merely under ground but under the ocean from going crazy? How do you build the thing without disrupting the delicate reef ecosystem? And, of course, how do pay for the thing?

Moffett just smiled and shook his head when confronted with the last question. “How the hell do I know?” he said. “I’m just an engineer.”

Then he took off his glasses and gave a kind of halfwink. “I leave it to the smarter people to figure out costs and such,” he said. “Just as long as I get to build the world’s longest underwater tunnel system in the world— and make a healthy profit along the way—I’ll be happy.”

If built, the Maui-Oahu tunnel would be remarkably similar to other undersea or subterranean tunnels around the world. Its three-tube design is pretty much an industry standard these days, allowing for easy maintenance and escape. Moffett said the trains would most likely be propelled magnetically through the tube, which would allow fantastic speeds surpassing even 200 miles per hour.

Every 50 miles or so, Moffett envisions rest stations with restaurants, shops, movie theaters and fitness gyms. If the state adopts a roadway option, the rest areas would include gas and service stations and possibly hotels. From entrance to entrance, hundreds of people would live and work.

Moffett even imagines stations or even tunnel stretches being transparent and lit by seafloor-mounted lights.

“Can you imagine driving and looking up and seeing sharks swimming overhead?” he said. “Or sitting back in a train observation car, just watching schools of fish?”

To many people, few experiences would compare.

For others, especially those who have a hard enough time traveling through completely rock-lined tunnels, nothing would be so terrifying.

For reasons not entirely understood, sustained tunnel driving seems to affect women and the elderly, wrote Dag Gotthard in the May, 2002 edition of the engineering journal Shaft. In fact, the journey can be so frightening they require special counseling.

Obviously, if driving through a tunnel for a couple minutes causes problems, what will spending two to three

Moffett is 41 years old. He’s about average height but thin—the sleeves of his green and white aloha shirt hang an inch below his elbows. He has closely cropped brown hair and bright blue eyes that seem to dance when talks to you.

By his own admission, Moffett was a problem child growing up in Carbondale, Illinois, a small town a lot closer to Kentucky—literally and culturally—than Chicago.

“Oh yeah,” he said. “It was a tough place, we were all tough. Even the faculty had chips on their shoulders. I can remember chucking many a cantaloupe at teachers’ houses.”

Twice divorced—he joked that his exes are friendlier with each other than they are with him—Moffett spends much of his intellectual life hundreds of feet beneath the surface in the world of undersea tunneling. There, buzzcut men such as himself trade PowerPoint Presentations

By Anthony Pignataro “You’ve seen, oh, what was that movie… Crimson Tide?” asked Moffett. “Remember how narrow those gangways and hatches are? Well, we were diving one day and I got to not looking where I was going and I tripped and fell down a stairwell. It wasn’t a particularly glamorous way to end my career—I was going to be a 30-year man. But it did turn out to be a blessing in disguise.”

Moffett said the accident left him with a crushed left arm—an injury so serious the Navy gave him a medical discharge. “Sure, it hurt like hell,” said Moffett. “At least it was my left and not my right arm. Without my right arm, I wouldn’t be able to… um… is this on the record?

Uh huh… Well, if I didn’t have my right arm, I wouldn’t be able to play golf.”

After his recuperation, Moffett said he decided to finish college, majoring in civil engineering.

Moffett paints a very pretty picture of high-speed trains and cars traveling hundreds of miles under the sea between the islands, but what about the surrounding reef? Won’t tunnel construction damage its delicate structures?

“Hey, I love the reef,” said Moffett. “There’s nothing I like better than going scuba diving. Okay, to be honest, there’s at least a dozen things I like better than scuba diving, but I do love scuba diving. I consider myself proenvironment, pro-marine life, and it pains me to say that dredging for the tunnel will tear merry hell out of that reef. Just blast it to Kingdom Come. If I could do this without ripping apart the reef I would, but I can’t.”

In fact, environmental degradation might be the least of Moffett’s problems. There’s still the little matter of political opposition to his proposal.

“I can’t believe anyone is taking this guy seriously,” said Sidney Finch, a spokesperson for the Fresno-based National Airline Association (NAA), an industry lobbying group. “His numbers don’t even come close to adding up. Do you have any idea what his tunnels will cost? Try $100 billion at least.”

Moffett bristles at such talk.

“Nobody knows that,” he said. “No one knows yet what kind of federal transportation grants this thing could qualify for. If the officials I’ve spoken with are as

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serious about this as they seem to be, they will find a way to fund this.”

No state or federal official contacted by Maui Time would comment on the record concerning the status of Moffett’s proposal. Moffett himself wouldn’t reveal which officials he’s spoken with.

“At this stage of the game, no one wants to go public with this, and I respect that,” he said. “But I can tell you that numerous people I’ve spoken with are very, very interested in this.”

One legislative aide, speaking on condition of anonymity, did confirm that Moffett had met with “more than one” state representative.

“Oh yeah, we’re all very familiar with this guy,” said the aide. “He’s a fascinating guy who, considering the utter outlandishness of his idea, makes a pretty good case. Can he make the numbers pencil out? That’s the question. And can he at least hold his ground against the airlines? If he can, I think you’ll find a few officials start to speak publicly on this. In just a few years, I think this will all be a very big deal.” MTW

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Is the state serious about a Maui-Oahu tunnel? punctuated with weird engineering terms like “shotcrete,” “shaft sinking” and “gravity base structures.”

It’s a world Moffett seems comfortable in. But that hasn’t always been the case.

For seven years during the 1980s, Moffett served in the U.S. Navy as a submariner. Serving mostly on attack boats, Moffett became very familiar with the idea of spending weeks or even months underwater.

“A boat is like any other ship in the navy, except it doesn’t have any windows,” said Moffett. “But unlike the other ships, submarines only have one enemy, and that’s the water that surrounds you. Every weapon you can think of—a missile, torpedo or depth charge—only serves to break open your hull and let the water come in. Every submarine that ever sunk was sunk by the ocean.”

In the waning Cold War days of 1987, when U.S. and Soviet subs still chased each other around the world’s oceans, Moffett’s boat ran into trouble 250 feet down. Or rather, Moffett ran into trouble 250 feet down.

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hours or longer under the ocean floor do? Gotthard’s thesis was that engineers could design “psychologically correct” tunnels using color, plants and special lighting.

“Especially long tunnels should include special widened tunnel sections about six kilometers [3.7 miles] in length,” wrote Gotthard. “These will provide turning areas, police surveillance bays as well as architectural breathing spaces.”

Gotthard suggested adding “illuminated lines of columns,” which would make the tunnel seem larger than it actually is. “It’s a simple fact that drivers feel safer in larger tunnels,” he wrote. Gotthard added that painting or illuminating tunnels so they’re green actually helps drivers relax.

Actual construction—at least as Moffett describes it— should be easier than most people think. First dredging equipment scrapes out a shallow trench in the ocean floor. Divers place temporary foundation blocks in the trench, then huge platforms are moved in.

These massive structures would then lower prefabricated sections of tunnel down into the trench. After sealing the sections, other equipment fills in the trench with backfill, and the whole process would begin again further down the line.

“You build a ramp at Kahului near the airport, another one in Honolulu, and then you start digging,” Moffett said.

“Just like laying down track for your old HO-scale train set, except you’re using tunnel sections. Each side meets in the center, seals it up and breaks open the Korbel.”

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APRIL 1, 2004

11

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DINING

PHOTO: KIRSTEN GUENTHER

FROM 2-5 PM

I had this boyfriend once who would dress up in my clothes to make me laugh.

He would get all made up in my cutoff jean shorts. It was hysterical. I don’t know why that made me think of hamburgers— must be all that American cheese.

The cross-dressing boyfriend is ancient history, but my fondness for burgers has developed into a serious relationship. The mad cow hype temporarily scared me away from my love of ground meat goodness, but a recent article in Organic Style magazine assured me that McDonald’s burgers are safe.

McDonald’s has been serving the world American food since 1940 when brothers Dick and Mac opened up the first restaurant. It was only 23 years later when—under new owner Ray Kroc—that one billion hamburgers had been sold and their creepy clowny spokesperson Ronald McDonald made his debut. On this island, McDonald’s is everywhere you are: Kahului, Pukalani, Kahana, Wailuku, Kihei, Lahaina, Ka’anapali. If there isn’t one close by, I’m sure there will be someday.

While McDonald’s doesn’t stay open for the late night fast food post-party gut-bombing, they sure come through for the hangover recovery meal. In fact, I have been conducting my own research study and have determined that McDonald’s is the number one meal choice for hung-over people.

Serving breakfast, lunch and dinner with walk-in, take-out, dine-in, or drive-thru service makes it easy to pick up a Mickey D feast in any condition. But convenience is only a small factor—it’s their grease that makes all the difference. A Double Quarter Pounder with cheese is sure to flush your liquor damage away with its 760 calories, 48 grams of fat, and 1450 milligrams of sodium, or at least put you in a food coma to temporarily treat the pain.

If you can forget the fact that huge multinational corporations like McDonald’s contribute to the devastation of the world through deforestation, ruthless anti-union practices and heart disease, order up because it tastes evilly delicious! Besides, McDonald’s is like other huge multinationals: It’s not going away.

Plus they got lotsa money behind them because the world has been buying their burg-

ers for the last 60 years. McDonald’s even has restaurants in India where the Cow is sacred and most people are vegetarian.

So you might as well get used to McWorld.

While you’re at it, teach your children to appreciate it, too. You can begin with the Happy Meal, all the necessary daily dose of Mickey D supplements your child needs plus a lame toy to keep them screaming for more.

Once you dig into one of the signature sandwiches like the Double Decker Big Mac, the Egg McMuffin, the McChicken, and Filet o’ Fish, or bite into the mysterious Chicken McNugget, you will be addicted. Try as we might, we can’t forget the fries, soft drinks, cookies, shakes and apple pies—the inside of which is actually hotter than the surface of the sun.

Steamed buns, fried meats, salted fries and soft serve are all part of the magic at McDonald’s. The ability to supersize yourself for 65 cents more makes it even more fun, at the world’s expense. But come next year, you won’t see supersizing on the menu any more, because McDonald’s is getting all wimpy over the fact that Americans are blowing up like Zeppelins.

So just order two of everything! MTW

DININGLISTINGS Ba-Le - French Vietnamese sandwiches, noodle dishes, pho, saimin and more. Plus, a large variety of tapioca. 270 Dairy Rd., Dairy Road Marketplace, Kahului, 877-2400 Bangkok Cuisine - Casual setting featuring exceptional Thai food with plenty of crisp vegetables and fresh seafood. Lunch, dinner, or takeout. 395 Dairy Road, Kahului, 893-0026 Biwon Restaurant - Fresh and flavorful, authentic Korean food. Open 10 a.m. to 10 p.m., lunch and dinner. 752 Lower Main, Wailuku, 244-7788 Cupie’s Drive-In - Local lunch take-out. Open Monday through Saturday. 134 W Kamehameha Ave. 877-3055

Da Kitchen - Huge portions of local Hawaiian food. Plate lunches, steak plates and amazing chicken katsu. Very casual; sit and eat or get your food to go. Also have a location in Kihei. 425 Koloa St. 871-7782 Dragon Dragon Chinese Restaurant Excellent service and fair prices with dishes like Kung Pao Chicken, Crispy Gau Gee Mein, Sweet and Sour Pork, and Honey Walnut Prawns. Maui Mall, Kahului, 893-1628 Dish - The concept is simple. Every month, the owner and manager decide on a different “menu” of 14 entrees, of which you may select 12 to assemble in their kitchen, Sessions available Wed.-Sat. 150 Hana Highway, Kahului , 8771414 Dunes Restaurant - Adventuresome revisions of local and American breakfast, lunch and dinner favorites. Maui Lani Golf Course, 877–7461 Fiesta Time - Quality Mexican taqueria. Order ala carte or combo specials with the freshest ingredients. 1132 Lower Main, Wailuku 249-8463 Go Sushi Go - Presents a concept unlike anything we’ve seen on Maui, conveyor-belt sushi.

Queen Ka'ahumanu Center, Kahului, 877-8744 Ichiban Restaurant and Sushi Bar Breakfast, lunch and dinner featuring modestly priced Japanese and Local cuisine. Kahului Shopping Center, 871–6977 Kahului Ale House - Wide selection of food with sports and games all around. 355 E. Kamehameha Ave. 877–9001 Krispy Kreme - This corporation is known all over the world for it’s tasty glazed dounuts. 433 Kele St., Kahului, 893-0883 Manaña Garage - Latin American cuisine with unique and colorful decor. Try the Chicken Tortilla Epozote, vegetarian enchiladas and paella. Cool, quaint bar with margaritas aplenty. 33 Lono St., Ste 150. 873–0220 Maui Coffee Roasters - Ono grinds and freshly roasted coffee in a fun and casual atmosphere makes this the place to “take five.” 444 Hana Hwy., Kahului, 877–CUPS Maui Beach Hotel - Buffet-style restaurant featuring different foods each night of the week.

Features range from Shabu Shabu (tons of meat) to sushi and Japanese. Call for buffet schedule.

170 Ka’ahumanu Ave., Kahului, 877-0051 Mike’s Restaurant - Authentic Chinese cooking and ono local grinds. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Also offer catering services.

1900 Main St., Wailuku, 244-7888 Piñata’s - Fresh and wholesome Mexican food from the Kitchen Sink burritos to quesadillas ala carte. Casual dining, various piñatas available too.

395 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 877–8707

Aroma D’Italia Ristorante - Southern Italian cuisine and full wine list at reasonable prices. Open MonSat, 5-9 p.m. 1881 S. Kihei Rd. 879-0133

Going to the theatre?

Go out to eat beforehand.

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Ashley’s South Shore Cafe - Affordable breakfast, lunch and dinner, burgers, local plates, fresh island fish, comfort foods, deli sandwiches, 362 Hukulii Pl. (off Ohukai, south of Tesoro gas station), Kihei. 874-8600 BadaBing! - Homey Italian haven, award-winning thin crust pizzas, veal, calamari or chicken picatta. 1945 S. Kihei Rd. 875–0811 Big Wave Cafe - Small cafe serving Pacific Rim cuisine, including lobster and sweet corn fritter with furikake tartar sauce, and coconut shrimp with fruit salsa and ginger lilikoi sauce. Open daily. 1215 S. Kihei Rd. 891-8688 Bistro Molokini - Blend of California and island cuisine, lunch and dinner. Poolside. Grand Wailea, 8751234 Bocalino Bistro & Bar - Affordably priced Mediterranean cuisine. Open for dinner, pupus served until 1 a.m. 1279 S. Kihei Rd., 874-9299 Blue Marlin Harbor Front Grill & Bar - Get amazing seafood, steaks and sandwiches; everything from pizza to sushi. Eat outdoors overlooking the Ma’alaea Fishing Fleet Lower level of Ma’alaea Harbor Village.

244-8844 Buzz’s Warf - Steaks, seafood and more, including Sweet Paradise Prawns. Reservations recommended.

Maalaea Harbor, 244-5426 Cafe Kiowi - Authentic Japanese fare according to centuries-old tradition. Or for casual dining in a relaxed garden setting. 5400 Makena Alanui, Maui Prince Hotel, Wailea, 874-1111 Caffe Ciao - Italian Cuisine baked in a Kiawe wood oven. Open for Lunch and dinner. Dine outdoors poolside. The Fairmont Kea Lani, Wailea, 875-4100

Cevoli’s Motorcycle Cafe - A bistro with pizza, pasta, ribs, fresh island fish, deli sandwhiches and nightly specials. 1280 S Kihei Rd., Azeka Plaza, 874-8377

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Go out to eat beforehand.

Antonio’s - Homemade Italian cuisine in a cozy atmosphere, extensive wine list and friendly service.

1215 S. Kihei Rd. 875-8800

Ruby’s - Walk down memory lane at this fabulous ‘50s cafe. Quintessential American dining morning to night. Queen Ka`ahumanu Center.

COVER STORY

Going to a concert?

Alexander’s Fish & Chips - Fish, chicken and Ribs.

Great food FAST at fast food prices! 1913 S. Kihei Rd., 874-0788

Capische? - Contemporary Italian with a twist; extensive wine list. Commanding ocean views from every table. Wailea Diamond Resort, 879–2224

NEWS

Go out to eat beforehand.

SOUTH MAUI

Pulehu BBQ - Local plate lunch with a Southern twist. 1500 Lower Main St., Wailuku. 244-4049 or 244-6159

LETTERS

Going to a club?

…

Curry in a Hurry - Curry dishes that are delightful and delicious in alternative vegetarian eating.

333 Dairy Rd. Kahului, 877-3328

Go out to eat beforehand.

F

CENTRAL MAUI Aloha Grill - Wide assortment of burgers including veggie styles, plus all the extras. Dairy Road Marketplace, Kahului, 893–0263

Going to a movie?

248-7829 Saeng’s Thai Cuisine - Vegetarian, meat and seafood Thai entrees in a casual garden setting. 2119 Vineyard, Wailuku, 244-1567 Saigon Cafe - Wailuku’s hidden secret! Delicious and affordable Vietnamese cuisine with excellent service. 1792 Main, Wailuku, 243-9560 Sheik’s Restaurant - Local favorites including Loco Moco and Shoyu Chicken. 97 Wakea Ave. 877-0121 Stillwell’s Bakery & Cafe - Specialty cakes and desserts, breads and pastries, with sandwiches, salads and soups for lunch. Open 6 a.m.-4 p.m. Mon-Sat. 1740 Kaahumanu Ave, Wailuku, 243-2243 Tasty Crust - Local style cuisine for breakfast (try their famous hotcakes!), lunch and dinner. Serving Maui since 1944. 1770 Mill, Wailuku, 244-0845 Tin Ying Chinese Restaurant - A Hong Kong style Chinese seafood restaurant. They have over 100 menu choices at reasonable prices. Buffet style lunch takeout, as well as sit down dining. 1088 Lower Main St. , Wailuku, 242-4371 Tokyo Tei - Lunch and dinner featuring teriyaki beef and fish, tempura, datsu, saimin and more. 1063 E. Lower Main St., Wailuku, 242-9630 Valley Isle Sea Food - Known for its Stew made with Luau, along with several choices of seafood. 475 Huiliike St., Kahului, 893-0497 Wei Wei BBQ and Noodle House - Very affordable Chinese cuisine, counter-service, delicious noodle dishes. 210 Imikala St., Wailuku, 242-7928 Wow-Wee Cafe - Unique candy bars, ice cream shakes, bagels, coffees, great sandwiches and soups.

Also featuring a Hawaiian menu with kava kava and an oxygen bar. 333 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 871-1414 <www.mauiwowwee.com>

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

Contemporary American Steak & Seafood

Sauvage Salad Garden - Now Open Monday thru Friday 11:00am-2:30pm • Ahi Poke Caesar Salad • Chinese Chicken Salad • Smoked Marlin Salad Sandwich • Pesto Pizza • Kalua Pig Sandwich w/Chipotle • Peppered Ahi Burger New Addition: - Nightly 4:00pm-9:00pm Great Appetizers, Pizzas, Pastas, Entrée Salads, Sandwiches and Drink Specials Everything $7-$12

Courtyard Café Menu

Still Available Nightly • Chef Dean’s Award Winning Steak & Seafood Menu Is Served Nightly In Our Spacious, Climate Controlled Dining Rooms • Best Wine Prices In Lahaina • Very Limited Seating. Call For Reservations

661-7600

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

844 Front St.

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

APRIL 1, 2004

13

DININGLISTINGS Homemade Italian Cuisine

Cyberbean Internet Cafe - Gourmet coffee, espressos, cappucinos, lattes, sandwiches, smoothies and salads. 1881 S. Kihei, 879-4799

Made from Scratch

Da Kitchen - Huge portions of local Hawaiian food. Plate lunches, steak plates and amazing chicken catsu. Very casual; sit and eat or get your food to go. Also have a location in Kahului. 2439 S. Kihei Rd., 875-7782

opopopopopopopopop

Voted #1 Steak Outstanding Seafood Wine Spectator Award of Excellence

Ravioli Lasagna Meatballs Osso Buco Tiramisu Open Tuesdays thru Sundays 5pm - 9pm

(808) 667-7477

1215 S. Kihei Rd. (Long’s Ctr.) • 875-8800

Located at the Entrance to Kaanapali

YOUR KITCHEN AWAY FROM HOME HAPPY HOUR EVERY DAY! from 12 to 3pm and 9 to11pm $ 2 Pizza Slices 2 Bud or Coors Lt Draft Beers $ 250 Well Drinks

$

A TASTE OF LAHAINA WINNER FOR 4 CONSECUTIVE YEARS “BEST VEGETARIAN” “BEST MEAT” “BEST APPETIZER” & “BEST SEAFOOD”

505 FRONT STREET, 661–8112

Mega Touch Games, Pool Table, Jukebox

Dick’s Place - Incredible all-you-can-eat food specials, free pool playing with purchase. Eight pool tables. 2463 S. Kihei Rd. 874–8869 Fernando’s - Authentic Mexican food. Open 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. daily. 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei. 8799952 Ferraro’s - Gourmet Italian cuisine oceanfront with live violin and guitar, outdoor kiawe-woodburning oven, all-day lunches and cucina rustica dinners. Four Seasons Resort Wailea, 874-8000.

Five Palms Beach Grill - Local produce and fish featured in Pacific Rim cuisine. 2960 S. Kihei Rd. 879–2607 Harry’s Sushi Bar - Japanese cuisine with fresh and delicious sushi, open 5 p.m. to midnight daily.

100 Ike Drive, Wailea, 879-7677 Horhitos Mexican Cantina - Burritos, salads, appetizers and “Food for Gringos,” too! Located next to Hapa’s Nightclub. Open 5 p.m. to 2 a.m.

Mon.-Sat. Lipoa St., Kihei, 891-MEXI Hula Moon - Enjoy breakfast, lunch, dinner or a champagne Sunday brunch with an open air tropical setting and spectacular ocean views.

Featuring fresh Hawaiian fish. 3700 Wailea Alanui, 874-7831 Humuhumunukunukuapua’a - Hawaiian and Polynesian cuisine oceanside. Grand Wailea Resort, 875-1234 ext. 4900 Jawz Tacos - Island-style tacos and burritos, including choice of vegetarian, mahi mahi, ono, shrimp, chicken or steak. Impressive salsa bar and the taco salads are da bomb! 1280 So. Kihei Rd. 874-TACO Joy’s Place - “Smart eating” featuring organic foods which are low fat, low salt and wheat free.

Open Monday through Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

1993 S. Kihei Rd. 879-9258 Kai Ku Ono - A tapas-style menu, where everything is ala carte, special late night menu and sushi. Serving breakfast, lunch and dinner with bar and lounge area. 2511 S. Kihei Rd. 875–1007

We Now Deliver!

Monday-Friday 11am - 2pm DA BEST AUTHENTIC MEXICAN FOOD

le b a l i a v A t •Take-ou s t n e i d e r g n I t s e h s e •Fr •Taqueria

FREE CHIPS & SALSA

Kihei Caffe - Affordable breakfast and lunch with lanai seating, hearty portions, tasty sandwiches, huli chicken and fresh fish. 1945 S. Kihei Rd. 879-2230 Life’s a Beach - Food and drinks in a fun atmosphere. Best Mex, nachos, burritos, prime rib and grilled mahimahi are just some of the specialties.

1913 S. Kihei Rd. 891–8010 Lobster Cove - Seafood, steak, lobster at its best in a relaxed and casual atmosphere. Open 5 p.m. to midnight daily. 100 Ike Dr., Wailea, 879–7677 Longhi’s Wailea - Seafood, meat and pasta entrees with many not listed on the menu. Ask the server for details. 3750 Wailea Alanui Dr. 891–8883 LuLu’s - Ribs, burgers, chicken wings and Black ‘n Blue Ahi and more in a fun, upbeat tiki-fied atmosphere with a great bar and huge deck. 1945 S. Kihei Rd. 879-9944 Ma`alaea Grill - Reasonably priced fine dining overlooking the harbor from the Maui Ocean Center. Ma`alaea Harbor Village Shops, 243–2206 Ma’alaea Waterfront Restaurant - Seafood and Continental cuisine. Open for dinner daily from 5pm. Milowai Condominium, 50 Hauoli St. 244-9028

Wailea 874–1131 Nick’s Fishmarket - Fine dining in open air and elegance with amazing seafood dishes and fresh fish preparations. Kea Lani Hotel, Wailea, 879–7224 Pita Paradise - Good food, fast. Serving up a mean Mediterranean-style “gyro”, salads or wraps, with outdoor lanai. Kihei Kalama Village Center, 875–7679 Royal Thai Cuisine - Thai food with a large selection of vegetarian dishes. Open for lunch (Mon-Fri) and dinner (nightly). 1280 South Kihei Rd., 874-0813.

Roy’s Kihei Bar & Grill - Mouth-watering Hawaiian fusion entrees in a spacious and upbeat atmosphere.

Open nightly from 5:30 to 10pm. Fine dining, reservations recommended. Piilani Shopping Center, 303 Piikea Ave. 891-1120 Sansei Restaurant - Japanese based Pacific Rim dining, sushi bar and late night menu. Award winning cuisine, early bird and late night specials. 1881 S. Kihei Rd. 879–0004 Sarento’s on the Beach - Contemporary dining near the water’s edge. Italian cuisine, very romantic. Private VIP table available. 2980 S. Kihei Road. 875–7555 Sausage Shack - Sausage sandwiches, even chicken or turkey, killer burgers and healthy vegetarian stuff. Sip a beer or margarita outside on the lanai. 1913 S. Kihei Rd. 874–6444 Spago - Gourmet cuisine as presented by worldfamous chef-owner Wolfgang Puck, oceanfront dining at its finest! Four Seasons Resort Wailea, 874-8000 Spices - Steak, seafood and more! Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. The Maui Coast Hotel, 2259 S. Kihei Rd. 891-8860 Stella Blues Cafe - Healthy, quality food in a casual, homestyle setting. Breakfast, lunch and dinner with daily specials. 1279 S. Kihei Rd. 874-3779 Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Cafe - Relaxed island luxury in ambience and cuisine, with ocean views and live music. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983

UPCOUNTRY Anthony’s Coffee Company - A full espresso bar, hot and cold sandwiches, ice cream. Make sure to stop in for a great box lunch to go! 90 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-8340 Café 808 - Local diner style serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Open daily from 6 a.m. to 8 p.m. 4566 Lower Kula Rd. 878-6874 Cafe O’Lei - Dining featuring light and healthy yet hearty gourmet lunch, delicious salads, focaccia sandwiches. Makawao Paniolo Courtyard, 573-9065 Café Des Amis - Charming cafe with delicious sweet and savory crepes and Mediterranean fare. 42 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-6323 Café Mambo - International bistro featuring Mediterranean and Mexican cuisine with Moorish influences. 30 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-8021 Cakewalk Paia Bakery - High quality baked goods, sandwiches and specialty cakes. 2 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-8770 Casanova - First class service, first class food. Fine Italian dining at night and Makawao’s favorite deli by day. 1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao, 572–0220 Charley’s Restaurant & Saloon - Hankering for some grub? Charley’s serves it hearty and healthy from breakfast to dinner and beyond. 142 Hana Hwy., Pa`ia, 579–9453.

Colleen’s - 1940’s style city bistro atmosphere serving breakfast, lunch and dinner from 6 a.m. to 9:30 p.m. daily. Haiku Cannery, 575-9211 Cow Country Cafe - Homestyle breakfast and lunch in a decidedly bovine atmosphere. 7 Aewa Pl., Pukalani, 572-2395 Fresh Mint - Vietnamese vegetarian cuisine including Summer Rolls, Spicy Lemongrass Soup and Soy Fish in Clay Pot. Open daily 11 a.m. to 9 p.m. Catering and takeout available. 115 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9144

with this Ad

Marco’s South Side Grill - A lavish and beautiful setting, compliments the hearty Italian food and excellent wines. 1445 S. Kihei Rd. 874–4041

KIHEI • LIPOA CENTER • 41 E. LIPOA

Cevoli’s Motorcycle Cafe - A Bristro with, pizza, pasta, ribs, fresh island fish, deli sandwhiches nightly entrees. 1280 S Kihei Rd. Azeka Plaza, 874-8377

Hana Hou Cafe - Hawaiian homestyle cooking with aloha-filled ambience and local musicians. 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery, 575-2661

Mulligan’s On the Blue - Maui’s authentic Irish pub, plenty o’Irish food, whiskey and beer.

Breakfast is served till 3 p.m. 100 Kaukahi St.

Island Tacos - Taco stand with fresh, made-to-order fish, beef and chicken tacos. Daily, from 11 a.m.-4 p.m.

810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery

NEXT TO GOLDS GYM

879-9952 14

APRIL 1, 2004

DINING

Hali`imaile General Store - Gourmet dining in a charming atmosphere. Chef Beverly Gannon’s awardwinning menu. 900 Hali`imaile Rd, Hali`imaile, 572–2666

DININGLISTINGS Jacque’s Northshore Bistro - Tropical yet festive atmosphere, with a sushi bar, indoor and lanai dining. 120 Hana Hwy, Pa`ia. 579–8844 Jameson’s Grill & Bar - Featuring fine steaks, fresh local fish and seafood, and of coursebaked artichoke. 200 Kapalua Dr. Lahaina 669-5653 Kimura Saimin Shop - Casual atmosphere, simple, affordable menu with fresh ingredients done right! 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery. 5755228 Kitada’s - Saimin for breakfast is a standard. Teri beef, hamburger steak, tofu and hekka all available. 3617 Baldwin Ave., Makawao. 572–7241 Kula Lodge & Restaurant - Upcountry’s family-style restaurant with sweeping views of the island. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Haleakala Highway. 878-1535 La Provence - French style bistro and patisserie with lanai, serving breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Open Wednesday through Sunday, 8:30 a.m. to 9 p.m. 3158 Lower Kula Rd. 878-1313.

Livewire Cafe - Gourmet desserts, coffee drinks, smoothies. Open 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. Sun. thru Thu. - 6 a.m. to midnight Fri. and Sat. 137 Hana Highway, Paia. 579-6009 Lynne’s Cafe - Affordable homestyle local food including breakfast, plate lunch, chow fun and more! Catering available. 810 Kokomo Rd. 5759363 Makawao Steak House - Classic and comfortable menu with daily fish preparations and salad bar. 3612 Baldwin Ave., Makawao. 5728711 Mama’s Fish House - Fresh island fish with fresh local ingredients at “Maui’s favorite restaurant.” 799 Poho Pl., Kuau. 579–8448 Maui’s Best Tamales & Local Food Authentic, fresh and tasty mexican cuisine along with local favorites. 81 Makawao Ave/Pukalani Square 573-2998

Milagros Food Co. - South American cusine with an island influence. Best people watching spot in Pa`ia!

Extensive tequila menu and delicious daily specials. 3 Baldwin St. 579–8755 Moana Bakery & Cafe - Pacific rim dining for vegetarians and meat eaters. Bakery provides wonderful goodies for the sweet tooth. 71 Baldwin Ave., Pa`ia.

579–9999 Pa`ia Fish Market - By serving fresh local Hawaiian fish daily, they are the hot spot for seafood lovers without the upscale pocket. 100 Hana Hwy., Pa`ia.

579–8030 Polli’s Mexican Restaurant - Paniolo country’s premier Mexican cantina, with nachos, burritos, ensaladas and more! 1202 Makawao Ave. 572-7808 SandBar & Grill - Casual contemporary island cuisine, featuring pupus, salads, kiawe grill burgers, sandwiches and lobster tacos. Full bar, happy hour everyday 4-6 p.m. Open daily from 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. 89 Hana Hwy., Paia 579-8742 Veg Out - Vegan and vegetarian food, from Mexican, Italian and Far East influences. 810 Kokomo Rd., Haiku.

575-5320

WEST MAUI A&J Kitchen, Deli & Bakery - Choose from American, Hawaiian, Korean and Chinese cuisines.

Bakery with cakes and cookies. Lahaina Center.

667–0623 Aloha Mixed Plate - Experience the traditional foods of the varied ethnic groups that call Hawaii home.

The plate lunch -- or mixed plate. 1285 Front Street Lahaina, 661-3322 Athens Greek Restaurant - Affordable and authentic gyros, shish kebabs, falafels and more! Ya’Sou! Lahaina Cannery Mall 661-4300 The Bakery - Fresh baked breads and pastries. Soup and sandwiches available. 991 Limahana Pl., Lahaina 667-9062 Ba-Le - French Vietnamese sandwiches, noodle dish-

es, pho, saimin and more. Wide variety of tapioca.

Lahaina Cannery Mall 661-5566 Bamboo Bar & Grill - Vietnamese, Thai and Japanese sushi. Delivery available, great daily specials. Open late with full bar, pool tables. 505 Front St. Lahaina 667-4051 Banyan Tree - “Eclectic Pacific Cuisine with a Hawaiian Twist.” Lodge atmosphere, ocean views. Ritz Carlton Kapalua. 669–6200 Basil Tomatos Italian Grill - Specializing in Northern Italian cuisine. Come in for the ambience, stay for the delightful dining experience. 2780 Kekaa Dr. Kaanapali, 662-3210 BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria - Deep-dish specialty pizzas and homemade Pizookies with live music nightly.

Overlooking Front Street, with ocean view. 730 Front St. 661-0700.

Blue Lagoon - Casual dining with local grinds and bar, surrounded by waterfalls and palm trees. Wharf Cinema Center. 661–8141 Breakwall Cafe’ - Serving breakfast, coffee’s music, sandwiches, salads, smoothes. open everyday 7 a.m.- 2 p.m. 505 Front St. Lahaina, 661-7220 Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. - Fine Southern foods, with “Forrest Gump” movie memorabilia and logo wear in a lively, casual atmosphere. 889 Front St. 661–3111 Cafe O’Lei - Oceanfront dining featuring light and healthy yet hearty gourmet lunch and dinner. Delicious salads and Focaccia sandwiches. 839 Front St. 661–9491 Cafe Sauvage - Gourmet, hearty, satisfying fare in an unpretentious setting. Extensive beer and wine menu, after-dinner cordials, and desserts! 844 Front St. 661–7600 Captain Dave Fish & Chips Classic baskets of fish and chips. Open daily 126 Lahainaluna Rd. 667-6700.

Canoes - Casual yet elegant dining serving a combination of island-inspired contemporary and traditional cuisine.1450 Front St. 661–0937

Castaway Cafe - Located next to the beach. Serving breakfast lunch and Dinner. Soups, salds, Pasta’s,Maui Kaanapali Villas & Resort Kaanapali 661-9091.

Chez Paul Resturant - Fine dinning French cusine, open for dinner only. Romantic setting. Call for reservations 820 Olowau Rd. 661-3843 China Boat - The best Mandarin Szechwan Cuisine on Maui, lunch and dinner. 4474 L. Honoapiilani Road, Kahana Gateway Shopping Center. 669-5089 CJ’s Deli & Diner - Reasonably priced “comfort foods” such as Reuben sandwiches, pot roast, freshly baked pies, and more! Open daily 2580 Kekaa Drive Fairway Shops, Kaanapali 667-0968 Compadres Bar & Grill - Western cooking with a Mexican accent. Oceanview dining & Margarita bar serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-7189 Cool Cat Cafe - ‘50s-style diner with lanai. Delicious burgers and sandwiches, huge salads and classic fountain desserts. Lahaina Wharf Center, 667-0908 David Paul’s Lahaina Grill - Fine dining in the intimate dining room on the ground floor of the Lahaina Inn building. 127 Lahainaluna. 667–5117 Dollie’s Pub & Cafe - Pizza, pupus, sandwiches, salads and full bar. Open daily 11 a.m. to midnight.

4310 L. Honoapiilani Hwy., Kahana Manor Shops, 6690266 Erik’s Seafood & Sushi - Fresh seafood and sushi - great steamers! Open nightly. 843 Wainee St., Lahaina 662-8780 Gaby’s Pizzeria - Casual Italian dining with pizza and pasta from $6-$25. Open 11 a.m. to 12 a.m. daily. 505 Front Street, 661-8112.

Gazebo Restaurant - Full breakfast and lunch menu, casual atmosphere, beautiful oceanside setting. 5315 Lower Honoapiilani Rd, 669-5621.

Gerard’s - Fine French dining in downtown Lahaina.

Rich, flavorful yet light foods await your taste buds.

174 Lahainaluna. 661–8939

The only ingredient missing is you!

Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner Try our new menu!

KAMA’AINA & SEAFOOD

EH BRAH!

SPECIALS ALL WEEK LONG

Buy Any: ~BREAKFAST ~LUNCH ~KAVA DRINK ~OXYGEN BAR SESSION

Second one is FREE! (present this coupon/valid through 4/30/04)

Sushi Bar NOW OPEN Monday-Saturday ‘til 9pm

MAUI’S CAFE & KAVA BAR

SEND YOUR EH BRAH TO ehbrah@mauitime.com

NEWS

COVER STORY

MON-1-1/4 LB LIVE MAINE LOBSTER $18.95 TUES-KAMA’AINA 50% OFF DINNER ENTREES WED-1LB. ALASKAN KING CRAB LEGS $19.95 THUR-14OZ PRIME RIB $16.95 FRI-KAMA’AINA 50% OFF DINNER ENTREES Kama’aina valid w/ HI ID & 17% Gratuity prior to Discount

HAPPY HOUR DAILY 3-6 $2.75 TROPICALS / WELLS $1.75 DRAFTS

TALK IS CHEAP

LETTERS

NIGHTLY SPECIALS

AR DOLLL ES B DOU DAY ALL

FRESH $1.00 R S OY TTEERS SHOO

333 DAIRY RD. KAHULUI 871-1414 • OPEN 6AM DAILY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

Buy One Entrée and Get 50% Off the Second Entrée Daily 5 to 6 pm

Tuesdays $24.95 Salad & Prime Rib …while it lasts!

2259 S. Kihei Rd (At the Maui Coast Hotel)

808-891-8860 DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

APRIL 1, 2004

15

Proudly Serving Wiseguys!!

DININGLISTINGS Giovani’s Tomato Pie Ristorante - Fine Italiain dining located in Kaanapali Lahaina. Open for dinner 2291 Kaanapali Prkwy, 661-3160

Italian Restaurant

Kihei Kalama Village 1945 S. Kihei Road • 875–0188 Open Every Day For Lunch & Dinner Noon to 10 PM

“WHO HAS

SAID A GREAT MEAL TO BE EXPENSIVE ”

Chef M a rk E llma n’s

Pancho & Lefty’s - Delicious and spicy appetizers, traditional and specialty Mexican food. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 661–4666

Hard Rock Cafe - Good American food at decent prices amongst rock ‘n roll memorabilia.

900 Front St., Lahaina, 667–7400

Penne Pasta - Mark Ellman’s inexpensive Italian bistro with homestyle pasta, pizza and salad. 180 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 661–6633

Hecocks - Italian restaurant and cocktail lounge oceanside. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8810

Pioneer Inn - Breakfast, lunch and dinner daily, with live entertainment nightly. 659 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-3636

House of Saimin - Ono homemade Saimin, chicken sticks, and Haupia pie are just some of the local favorites here. Old Lahaina Center, 667–7572

Pita City Falafel - Greek, Kabobs, Shawarma Gyro’s, juice bar. open 7 days 658 Front St. #109 Wharf St., Lahaina 667-7757

Hula Grill - Barefoot Bar and beachside dining in a 1940s style. Menu is a seafood lover’s delight. Whaler’s Village, Kaanapali, 667–6636

Pizza Paradiso - Voted “Best Pizza on Maui” since 1998. Award winning pasta dishes, toss-to-order salads, big fat Greek gyros, homemade tiramisu and panna cotta. Dine in or take-out, lunch and dinner. Honokowai Marketplace, 667-2929; Whalers Village, 667-0333

i`o - Pacific Rim cuisine among awesome sunset views, and indoor or outdoor dining. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661–8422 Java Jazz/Soup Nutz - Coffee bar and cafe with great food, eclectic atmosphere, loungey ambience. 3350 Lwr Honoapiilani Rd., Honokowai, 667-0787 Jonny’s Burger Joint - Great burgers, as well as Mexican food, salads and fried items, served until midnight, with bar and pool table!

2395 Honoapiilani Hwy, Kaanapali, 661-4500 Kahuna Kabob - Healthy food, low prices!

Soups, brown rice, veggies and kabobs, will deliver. Lahaina Marketplace, 661–9999 Kimo’s - Fresh fish, prime rib, and their famous Hula Pie, oceanside dining. Live entertainment.

845 Front St., Lahaina, 661–4811

Lahaina Coolers - Off the beaten path “surf bistro”. Good food, good quality, late night menu. 80 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 661–7082 Lahaina Fish Co. - Chef’s Signature Pacific Rim Specialties prepared with fresh island fish, and seafood, dine on the oceanside lanai. 831 Front St., Lahaina, 661–3472 Leilani’s On The Beach - Relaxed beachfront dining, specializing in fresh seafood and Pacific Rim cuisine. 2435 Kaanapali Parkway., Whalers Village, 661-4495 Lemongrass - Serving ala carte to the seven course traditional Vietnamese dinner.

Reasonably priced and full of flavor. 930 Waine`e St., Lahaina, 667–6888

Pastas, Salads, Pizzas, Sandwiches and Nightly Seafood Specials with nothing over $12.95 We now have Brown Rice Pasta! Wheat & Gluten Free!

50¢ extra / Cooked to order so it takes a few minutes longer

661-6633 • 180 Dickenson Street • Lahaina 16

APRIL 1, 2004

DINING

Pacific’O - Elegant oceanfront award-winning contemporary Pacific cuisine. Live jazz on weekends. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 667-4341

Fish & Game Brewing Co. - Maui’s own restaurant brewery, with rotisserie grill, featuring steak, seafood and ambience. Also, latenight menu served until 1:30 a.m.! 4405 Honoapiilani Hwy., Kahana, 669-3474

Kobe - Japanese Steak House and Oku’s Sushi Bar, featuring teppanyaki cooking and fabulous sushi. Dinner nightly from 5:30-10 p.m., Sushi 5:3011:30 p.m. 136 DickensonSt., Lahaina, 667-5555

Beer & Wine

a casual and lively atmosphere. 4405 Honoapiilani Hwy, Kahana 665-1822

Plantation House Restaurant - Hawaiian Mediterranean cuisine. Breakfast, lunch and dinner daily. 2000 Plantation Club Dr., Kapalua, 669-6299 Reilley’s - Known for their choice award winning beef. Gourmet steaks and seafood overlooking the Ka`anapali Golf Course’s 18th hole. 2290 Ka`anapali Pkwy, 667–7477 Roy’s Nicolina Restaurant - A quiet ambience suffuses this dining experience, enhanced by the Pacific Rim cuisine. 4405 Honoapi`ilani Hwy, Kahana, 669–5000 Rusty Harpoon Restaurant and Tavern Quench thirst, satiate hunger and watch sports.

Large parties welcome. Whalers Village, 661–3123 Ruth’s Chris Steak House - USDA Prime Steak, fine wines. Dinner served nightly. 900 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8815 Sansei Seafood Restaurant and Sushi Bar D.K. Kodama has combined the highest quality sushi bar infused with Hawai`i’s cultural flavors. 115 Bay Drive #115., Kapalua, 669–6286 Sea House Restaurant - Looking out over incredible Napili Bay, dining is an amazing experience here under the direction of Chef Michael Gallagher. 5900 Lwr. Honoapi`ilani Hwy. 669–1500 Smokehouse BBQ Bar & Grill - The best BBQ ribs on the island. along with burgers, and sandwhiches. Great veiw of the ocean. 1307 Front St,. Lahaina, 667-7005 Spats Trattoria - Step into old Northern Italy. Tables are private, the Antipasti serves two. The Hyatt Regency, Kaanapali, 667–4727 Sports Club Kahana Grill - Upscale, healthy restaurant inside Sports Club Kahana. Breakfast, lunch & take-out. 4327 Lwr. Honoapi`ilani Rd. 669-3539

Longhi’s - Elegant fine dining, freshest ingredients, pasta, seafood and steaks. Dancing on Fridays. 888 Front St., Lahaina, 667–2288

Sunrise Cafe - Casual and cozy outdoor lanai, serving American food from 6 a.m. to 4 p.m. daily. 693 Front St., Lahaina 661-8558

Mama’s Ribs & Rotisserie - Serving ribs and roasted chicken, BBQ baked beans, cole slaw, and macaroni salad. Napili Plaza, 665–6262

Swan Court - One of the top 10 romantic restaurants in the world. Hyatt Regency Maui, Kaanapali, 667–4727

Moose McGillicuddy’s - Great value, large portions, all you can eat specials and merry atmosphere. 844 Front St., Lahaina, 667–7758

Take Sushi - Open late night for late night Sushi lovers. full menu Daily Specials. 505 Front St. Lahaina 667-4051

Mr. Sub Sandwhiches - speciality sandwhiches, salads and homemade soups. 129 Lahainaluna Rd., Lahaina, 667-5683.

Thai Chef - Thai food like you’ve never had it, Curry, Pad Thai, summer rolls and more. Old Lahaina Center. 667–2814

Nachos Grande - Fresh mexican food, fast.

Vegetarian, too! Honokowai Marketplace.

662–0890

The Terrace Restaurant - Open from 6:30-11 a.m. serving breakfast only. Elegant dining, buffetstyle rotating menu. Special Mimosa and Bloody Mary menus. Ritz Carlton, Kapalua, 669-6200.

Nalu Sunset Bar & Sushi - Sushi rolls, sashimi, various Japanese appetizers, sandwiches and more. Maui Marriott, Kaanapali, 667–1200 ext. 51

The Feast At Lele, - A royal tour of the cuisine of Polynesia sharing the spotlight with music and dance from four Pacific islands. 505 Front Street, Lahaina, 667-5353

Okazuya Deli - Quality Japanese plate lunch.

The best lemon caper Mahi Mahi and Okinawan potato tempura ever! Open 10 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. and 4:30 to 9 p.m. 3600 Lower Honoapiilani Hwy., Honokowai, 665-0512

Tropica - Enjoy the fire and ice-themed restaurant where the cold food and drink bar is tucked between two “volcanoes.” The Westin Maui, Kaanapali, 667–2525

Ono’s Surf Bar & Grill - Family selections of healthy cuisine. Poolside. The Westin Maui, Ka’anapali 667-2525

Vino - Contemporary cuisine featuring fresh pasta and extensive wine list. Open for dinner nightly from 5:30 p.m. Village Course Clubhouse, Kapalua 661-8466.

Outback Steak House - Quality steaks, shrimp-on-the-barbie, and the Bloomin’ Onion in

Whale’s Tale - All open-air lanai dining. Casual dining, specials, large portions. 672 Front St. 667–4044

A&E 17 • Film 18-19 • This Week’s Picks 20 • The Grid 22, 24, 26 • Da Kine Calendar 21, 23, 25

ARTS&ENTERTAINMENT

BY SAMANTHA CAMPOS

From Africa, With Love Baaba Maal comes to the MACC Baaba Maal is one of Africa’s most treasured musicians and humanitarians.

Currently, he tours the world with his nine-person band, incorporating the traditional music of his homeland with a contemporary, global pop flair. He has created enough Afro-pop music to fill about a dozen albums and has sold out shows for almost 20 years.

It’s his message of positive change, personal empowerment and the peaceful unity of Africa that is the underlying force of all of his performances. A representative of the United Nations Development Program, Maal speaks out on the issue of HIV/AIDS and women’s rights in Africa. Many of his lyrics call for peace, world leadership accountability, changes in societal roles for women and communication as “positive ends.”

Maal comes from a small West African village—population 6,000—on the banks of the Senegal River. Technically, he was born into a fishermen caste, but became inspired early on by his mother’s singing. Maal’s mother also taught him the importance of intelligent and thoughtful lyricism, while encouraging him to explore the distinctive musical forms of the area.

American soul music was popular amongst African youth when Maal was growing up and he quickly immersed himself in the stylings of James Brown, Otis Redding, Wilson Pickett and Etta James. He also connected with Jamaican musicians Toots Hibbert, Bob Marley and Jimmy Cliff as they toured Senegal in the mid-1970s.

He left home early to study music and explore his national culture in the mainly French colonial capital of St. Louis but soon won an art scholarship in Senegal’s modern capital city, Dakar. Maal then joined Asly Fouta, a group of 70 musicians, and began learning as much as he could about the various stringed and percussion instruments of Senegal.

After college, Maal toured West Africa with his longtime friend Mansour Seck, a blind singer and guitarist. They traveled from village to village, playing music and discovering much about the history and music from each town’s elders.

Maal and Seck then went on the road to Europe, performed at a conservatory in Paris and quickly gained recognition for their unique fusion of West African folk and modern influences. When he returned to Senegal, Maal formed his own group, Daande Lenol, or “Voice of the People.” The group incorporated hip-hop, reggae and techno into their African pop sound and released a widely acclaimed album Firin’ in Fouta.

Baaba Maal and his current band combine the traditional sounds of Africa with modern reggae, rap and salsa, utilizing the percussive and stringed instruments of his native land. The performances, while billed as “acoustic,” should explode with talking drums, African dance and the passionate fervor of Senegal’s biggest export. By defying his predetermined fate yet valuing the gifts of his ancestors, Maal continues to create a bridge between Africa and the West.

Catch an acoustic evening with Baaba Maal and his band at the Maui Arts & Cultural Center’s Castle Theater, Thursday, April 8 at 7:30 p.m. Tickets are $10 and $26, with half-price for kids 12 and under. Supported in part by the National Endowment for the Arts, Hawaiian Airlines and KAOI. Pre-show from 5:30 p.m. in Yokouchi Founders Court. To purchase tickets or more information, call the box office at 242-SHOW. MTW

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FILM

The latest Hollywood trend toward making movies under 90 minutes long is a blessing to this tawdry update of director Phil Karlson’s 1973 original film that starred Joe Don Baker as real-life McNairy, Tennessee Sheriff Buford Pusser. Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is recast as Chris Vaughn, a retired soldier (ironically the real Sheriff Pusser was a former pro wrestler)

Walking Tall

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who returns to his Washington state hometown to find that a former high school rival (Neal McDonough) has opened an illicit casino and sunk the town into corruption.

Push soon comes to shove and Chris announces his run for Sheriff during a jury trial regarding a brutal beating he gave the casino’s security guards as revenge for physical damage they inflicted on him.

Where the original film achieved a profundity of real-life tragedy and sacrifice, director Kevin Bray’s film renders exploitation without thematic reward. Johnny Knoxville (Jackass) plays Vaughn’s ex-con deputy.

Walking Tall fits into a category of modern action movies (see A Man Apart and S.W.A.T.) that are far more tone than substance. It’s an extension of the departure away from socially topical movies that Spielberg and Lucas committed in the ‘70s when films like Jaws and Star Wars knocked the wind out of more poignant fare such as Catch 22, The Parallax View, or Serpico. The current shift is also a push toward sacrificing drama for spectacle that necessarily involves shooting thousands of rounds of ammunition and explosions-a-go-go. Here, it takes four screenwriters (David Klass, Channing Gibson, David Levien and Brian Koppelman) to capsize Mort Briskin’s original screenplay to a point where it has little in common with Pusser’s real-life story.

As a former Special Forces soldier in the Army, Chris Vaughn is a physically daunting young man returning to his hometown to follow in his father’s footsteps by working at the local saw mill. But the mill has been closed for some time and a casino and an adult bookstore have upended the town into a world of debauchery. His interracial parents tacitly define Vaughn’s darker skin color, but the subject is starkly avoided in any racial context other than the fact that the town is otherwise all white. On his second day back Vaughn meets up with his childhood friend Ray (Knoxville) and goes in for a game of touch football with other old friends and rivals,

Tallest rock I ever saw including one very nasty Jay Hamilton (McDonough) who arranges to win the game by attacking Vaughn’s weak left knee.

Still, Vaughn accepts Hamilton’s invitation to visit his casino that night. Once there, Vaughn discovers that his ex-girlfriend (Ashley Scott) is now working as a peep show dancer, and also notices that the craps dealer is switching in loaded dice. Vaughn demands instant justice over the trickery and ends up in a brawl that eventually finds him cut to ribbons and left for dead. After a recovery montage, Vaughn attempts to press charges against the men who tried to kill him, but is refused by the local sheriff who explains that the casino is a “no fly zone” because it brings in all of the town’s revenue. From this point the reversal to Chris Vaughn “avenging sheriff” is quick and the movie becomes mainly about how much violence and humiliation he and his deputy can dish out against the bad guys.

Former music director Kevin Bray (All About The Benjamins) directs the 85-minute film (10 minutes of credit time included) more as an extended short story than as a parable wrought with moral issues. In my book, it isn’t a real “movie” if it isn’t at least 90-minutes long. We are going through a period of shorter movies that reflect America’s stumbling economy.

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is, by contrast, a perfect figure for size-obsessed Americans who drive SUVs that diminish everything in their path while the country sinks into third world oblivion at its dependency on oil. Walking Tall gives you less for more. The original film was 125-minutes long. Maybe there is a moral topic revealed after all. Rated PG-13. 85 mins. MTW

SHOWTIMES

MOVIECAPSULES MAUI FILM FESTIVAL’S CANDLELIGHT CAFÉ & CINEMA Wednesday, April 7 The Barbarian Invasion 5 & 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater Rolling Stone raved; "It's a feast of smart, sexy, glorious talk. The Oscar for best foreign film belongs right here." And they were right! This year's Best Foreign Language Academy Award winner about an extended family reunion around the last days of its patriarch is "A full-bodied, funny and gloriously unpretentious ode to family, friendship and the meaning of life—solidly entertaining, sharply written and genuinely touching" (LA Times). In French with English subtitles.

Rated R. 96 min. Tickets: $8 w /M/FF passport. $10 single

New This Week Hellboy - (PG13) - Action/Horror - When a Nazi mystical experiment goes awry in 1944, the target of a wizard's spell, the child of Satan, Hellboy (Ron Perlman) is taken from his home, adopted by U.S. agents and is raised as a force of good. Now, the adult Hellboy, an investigator of the paranormal, is sent on a mission that brings him back in touch with the evil genius that started it all. Also stars John Hurt and Selma Blair.

Home on the Range - (PG) - Animation - Set in the Wild West, this is the story of a herd of cows who band together to save their farm. The widow owes $1000 mortgage on the farm and has no way to pay for it.

Fearing that they'll be sold to the local meat-packing plant, the cows’ leader Dame (voice of Judi Dench) seeks to find a way to earn the money by entering the family horse (Cuba Gooding, Jr.) that used to belong to a bounty hunter, has a bandit in the nearby town (Randy Quaid), with a $1000 bounty on his head. Voices by Sarah Jessica Parker, Roseanne and others.

The Prince and Me - (PG) - Romantic Comedy Starting her education at an Indiana university, a free-spirited American college student and motorcycling enthusiast (Julia Stiles) falls in love with one of her classmates, but what she doesn't know is that he's actually a Danish prince (Luke Mably), who is spending his "gap year" before having to perform his princely duties by hiding in America disguised as a regular guy.

Walking Tall - (PG13) - Action/Adventure - A retired soldier, Chris Vaughn (The Rock) returns to his hometown finds out that the place he grew up is now overrun with crime, drugs and violence. His wealthy high school rival (Neal McDonough) has closed the once-prosperous lumber mill and turned the town's resources towards his own criminal gains. With the help of an old pal (Johnny Knoxville), Chris gets elected sheriff and vows to shut down Hamilton's operations. See Film Critique.

Now Showing Agent Cody Banks 2: Destination London - (PG) - Action/Adventure - Agent Cody Banks (Frankie Muniz) returns as a rogue CIA agent (and

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Cody’s own trainer) has stolen a top secret mind-control device, and Cody has to go undercover in London to get it back.

Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen - (PG) Comedy - A teen (Lohan) is convinced that her home city revolves around her until her family packs up and moves to the suburbs. she finds that in her new school, there is another girl, Carla Santini (Fox), who already has claim to the title of most popular girl. Aiming to oust Carla from her reign, Lola sets her sights on nabbing the lead role in the next big school play which Carla also hopes to star in. As the two girls engage in a war for popularity.

Dawn of the Dead - (R) - Horror - The United States is turned upside-down by a strange plague-like event in which millions of corpses walk the earth as bloodthirsty zombies and multiplying rapidly. A small group of survivors, which include a nurse (Sarah Polley) and a police officer (Ving Rhames), try to find and protection within a massive shopping mall in Everett, WA. 50 First Dates - (PG13) - Romantic/Comedy - An aquarium veterinarian (Adam Sandler) in Hawaii falls in love with a young woman (Drew Barrymore) with a severe case of short-term memory loss, which means she never remembers meeting him, so he has to keep getting her to fall in love with him, over and over again.

Hidalgo - (PG13) - Action/Adventure - This epic adventure is based on a true story of the greatest long horse race ever run. In 1890, a wealthy Sheik (Omar Sharif) invited an American cowboy (Viggo Mortensen) and his horse to enter the greatest long horse race ever run, putting them against the world’s greatest Arabian horses and

Bedouin riders, whom were determined to prevent the American from finishing the race. For the cowboy, the race not only becomes a matter of pride and honor, but a race for his very survival.

Jersey Girl - (PG) - Romantic Dramedy - A smooth, Manhattan music publicist (Ben Affleck) has just married the love of his life (Jennifer Lopez) and has a child on the way. It's a perfect life that is tragically upended when he suddenly finds himself a single father unqualified for his new role.

Losing his job, he is forced to move back to the New Jersey suburbs, where he meets a beautiful young friend (Liv Tyler) who, along with his daughter (Raquel Castro), opens him up to love and courage again.

Ladykillers - (R) - Crime Comedy - The plot of an eccentric professor-turned-criminal-mastermind (Tom Hanks) to commit the massive heist of a New Orleans riverboat casino appears to be thwarted by the actions of Mrs. Munson, the seemingly-innocent little old landlady of the place that he and his three accomplices are staying in, and from which they want to dig a tunnel to where the casino's money is kept.

Passion of the Christ - (R) - Drama - This is the story about the last 12 hours in the life of Jesus Christ (James Caviezel), on the day of his crucifixion in Jerusalem. The film's script is based on several books, including the diaries of St. Anne Catherine Emmerich (1774-1824) as collected in the book, The Dolorous Passion of Our Lord Jesus Christ, and the New Testament books of John, Luke, Mark and Matthew.

Secret Window - (PG-13) - Thriller - Mort Rainey (Johnny Depp) is a writer just coming off of a difficult divorce with his ex-wife (Maria Bello) and finds himself being stalked at his remote lake house by a psychotic stranger (John Turturro), who claims Mort stole his best story idea.

Scooby Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed - (PG) Family Comedy - The sequel to the 2002 hit that translated the lives of Fred, Daphne, Velma, Shaggy and Scooby to the big screen as Scooby and the Mystery Inc. gang return in this adventure in which they must investigate the reappearances of several of the creatures from the classic TV show.

Spartan - (R) - Thriller - Secret Agent Robert Scott (Val Kilmer) is paired with novice agent Curtis (Derek Luke) to find the president’s daughter (Kristen Bell), who is the victim of a kidnapping.

Starsky & Hutch - (PG-13) - Action/Comedy - In 1970, Bay City police detectives Hutch (Owen Wilson) and Starsky (Ben Stiller) always get the toughest cases from their uptight boss Captain Dobey, so they rely on the knowledable street informer, Huggy Bear (Snoop Dogg). This time, they meet again with someone from their first big case which involved a former college campus drug dealer (Vince Vaughn) who ventured on to become a white collar criminal.

Taking Lives - (R) - An FBI special agent (Angelina Jolie) becomes entangled in an unexpected romance as she struggles to solve a case with a serial murderer who assumes the lives and indenties of his victums. Also stars Ethan Hawke, Kiefer Sutherland, Olivier Martinez and Gena Rowlands.

You Got Served - (PG13) - Comedy - A pair of friends (Omari Grandberry and Jarell Houston) want to open their own hip-hop dance and recording studio, but in order to do that, they must first win a street dance competition against another group of street dancers to prove that they have what it takes.

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MAUI FILM FESTIVAL Castle Theater, 572-3456 The Barbarian Invasion - R - Wed 5, 7:30

MAUI MALL MEGAPLEX Maui Mall, 249–2222 (Showtimes) = Matinee Dawn of the Dead - R - Th (1, 1:30, 4, 4:30), 7, 7:30, 9:30, 10, Fr, M-W (1:30, 4:30) 7:30, 10, Sa-Su (1:30), 4:30, 7:30, 10 50 First Dates - PG13 - Th (1:15, 4:15), 7:20, 9:45, Fr, M-W (1:30), 9:50, Sa-Su (1:30), 9:50 Hellboy - PG13 - Fr, M-W (1, 1;30, 4, 4:30), 7, 7:15, 9:45, 10, Sa-Su (1, 1:30), 4, 4:30, 7, 7;15, 9:15, 10 Hidalgo - PG-13 - Th (1, 1:30, 4, 4:30), 7, 7:45, Fr, M-W (4), 7, Sa-Su 4, 7 Jersey Girl - PG13 - Th-Fr, M-W (12:30, 2:50, 5:10), 7:30, 9:55, Sa-Su (12:30, 2:50), 5:10, 7:30, 9:55 Ladykillers - R - Th (12:45, 1:15, 4, 4:30), 7, 7:30, 9:30, 10, Fr, M-W (12:45, 1:15, 4, 4:30), 7, 7:30, 9:30, 10, Sa-Su (12:45, 1:15), 4, 4:30, 7, 7:30, 9:30, 10 Prince and Me - PG13 - Fr, M-W (1:15, 4:15), 7, 9:45, SaSu (1:15), 4:15, 7, 9:45 Scooby Doo 2 - PG - Th (12:30, 1, 2:45, 3:15, 5, 5:30), 7:15, 7:45, 9;30, 10, Fr, M-W (12:30, 1, 2:45, 3:15, 5, 5:30) 7:45, 10, Sa-Su (12:30, 10, 2:45, 3:15), 5, 5:30, 7:45, 10 Spartan - R - Th only 9:50 Walking Tall - PG13 - Fr, M-W (12;45, 3, 5:15). 7:15, 7:45, 9:30, 10, Sa-Su (12:45, 3), 5;15, 7:15, 7:45, 9:30, 10 You Got Served -PG13-Thonly((12:30, 2:45, 5) 7:15, 9:45

KA’AHUMANU 6 Queen Ka`ahumanu Shopping Center, 875-4910 Agent Cody Banks 2 - PG - Th only (1, 3:20), 5:35, 7:50, 10:05 Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen - PG - Th only (1:15, 3:15), 5:45, 7:45, 9:45 Home on the Range - PG - Daily (1, 3,) 5, 7, 9 Passion of the Christ - R - Daily (1:30), 4:30, 7:15, 10 Secret Window - PG13 - Daily (12:45, 3), 5:15, 7:30, 9:45 Starsky & Hutch - PG13 - Daily (12:30, 2:50) 5:10, 7:30, 9:50 Taking Lives - R - Daily (12:50, 3:05), 5:20, 7:40, 9:55

KUKUI MALL 1819 South Kihei Road, 875-4910 Hellboy - PG13 - Fr-Sa (1), 4:30, 7, 9:30, Su-Tu (1),4:30, 7:45 Hidalgo - PG13 - Th only (1), 4:15, 7:30 Home on the Range - PG - Fr-Sa (1:15), 4:15, 6:45, 8:45, Su-Tu (1:15), 4:15, 6:45 Prince and Me - PG13 - Fr-Sa (1:30), 4:45, 7:15, 9:45, Su-Tu (1:30), 4:45, 8 Passion of the Christ - R - Th only (1:15), 4:30 7:45, Scooby Doo 2 - PG13 - Th (1:30), 5, 8, Fr-Sa (1:45), 5, 7:30, 10, Su-Tu (1:45), 5, 8:15 Starksy & Hutch - PG13 - Th only (1:45), 4:45, 8:15

FRONT STREET THEATERS 900 Front Street, 249–2222 Hellboy - PG13 - Fr, M-W (4:10) 7:15, 9:50, Sa-Su (1:10), 4:10, 7:15, 9:50 Hidalgo - PG13 - Th (4), 7, 9:50, Fr, M-W (4), 7, 9:45, Sa-Su (1), 4, 7, 9:45 Taking Lives - R - Th (4:30), 7:30, 9:45. Fr, M-W (4:30), 7:30, 9:45, Fr, M-W, Sa-Su 7:30, 9:40 Scooby Doo 2 - PG - Th (4:15), 7:15, 9:30, Fr, M-W (4:45), 7:30, 9:30, Sa-Su (1:45) 4:45, 7:30, 9:30 Starsky & Hutch - PG13 - Th (4:45) 7:30, 9:45, Fr, M-W 4:30, Sa-Su (1:30), 4:30

WHARF CINEMA CENTER 658 Front Street, 249–2222 Dawn of the Dead - R - Th only (1:45, 4:15), 7:30, 9:55 Home on the Range - PG - Fr, M-W (2, 4:15), 7:15, 9:15, Sa-Su (11:30, 2) 4:15, 7:15, 9:15 Passion of the Christ - R - Th only (2, 4:30), 7, 9:30 Prince and Me - PG13 - Fr, M-W (1:30, 4:30, 7:30, 9:55, Sa-Su (11, 1:30), 4:30, 7:30, 9:55 Secret Window - PG13 - Th only (1:30, 4) Walking Tall - PG13 - Fr , M-W (1:45, 4) 7, 9:30, Sa-Su (11:15, 1:45), 4, 7, 9:30

8 7**

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19

Happy April Fool’s Day! As is our way in America, we seem to have lost the inherent meaning behind yet another holiday. Not just a day to play pranks on your loved ones, April Fool’s Day—or April 1st—originated by the adoption of a new calendar. Ancient cultures from the Romans to the Hindus and as far back as 500 B.C., celebrated New Year’s Day on April 1 because it closely follows the vernal equinox, or the changing into spring (Mar. 20 or Mar. 21, depending on the year). Well, good ol’ Pope Gregory XIII needed something to do so he ordered a new calendar in 1582, which called for New Year’s Day to be celebrated Jan. 1. But people in France uncharacteristically either didn’t want to accept the new New Year or just didn’t find out about it in time and continued to celebrate New Year’s Day on April 1. Jokes were made, and the horrendous, horrendous name-calling—mean-spirited people that we are—and a tradition began of sending innocents on “fool’s errands” or trying to trick them into believing something false. Eventually, the French called April 1 Poisson d’Avril, or “April Fish,” whereas children would tape a picture of a fish on the back of their schoolmates, calling out “Poisson d’Avril!” when the prank was discovered. I don’t know. Anyway, Great Britain finally adopted the new calendar in 1752, inciting such callous April Fool’s Day celebrations in England and the American colonies. Hurray.

Warm Voices Saturday, 7:30 p.m. at the Castle Theater, MACC Na Leo Pilimehana means “the voices blending together in warmth,” but it is also the name of a three-woman group that has put out some of the best in Hawaiian contemporary music for 20 years. Nalani Choy, Lehua Kalima Heine and Angela Morales are Hawaiian Superwomen in their 30’s who run their own record label company, compose, write lyrics, record and perform music, do volunteer work, play sports and are proud moms and wives! They’ve also won 21 Na Hoku Hanohano Awards (Hawaii’s “Grammies”) to date, including one for their first hit single, “Local Boys,” which became the best-selling single in Hawaii’s history. Last year, they were nominated for five Hoku Awards for Hawaiian Memories. Might as well practice your “Hana Hou!” now for these world-class singing tittas!

s i h t

week’s picks

by Sam Campos

Hottie Veggie Actress Friday, 7 p.m. at the Paia Community Center There isn’t much to be said about Alicia Silverstone, except that she’s a skilled 27-year-old actress and San Francisco native who starred in such films as The Crush, Clueless and Batman and Robin. Oh, and she’s going to be here, on our little island, to give a free lecture called “Vibrancy and the Spirit of Living.” “She will discuss her secrets to beauty, good health and success,” says a press release put out by the Vegetarian Society of Hawaii, “and show you how to discover easy ways to control your weight, look and feel better, and reduce illnesses—practical advice on living a healthy and successful life.” Better arrive early for this one. For more information, call 575-7694. [ANTHONY PIGNATARO]

Happily Ever After, My Ass! Friday-Saturday, 7:30 p.m.; Sunday, 6 p.m. at the Iao Theater There’s a reason Into the Woods won a 2002 Tony Award for Best Musical Revival—you can’t forget that damn song when you leave! No but seriously, this is a musical that features the wittiest of lyrics

by Stephen Sondheim and ahem, infectious songs. The characters are fabulous, the witch hilarious, the talent unbelievable and I can’t believe Milky-White (Jack’s cow) can hold that position for that long!

This is a playful, grown up take on the fables of Cinderella, Little Red Ridinghood, The Baker and his Wife and Jack in the Beanstalk that actually deals with the realities that traditional fairy tales fail to examine: i.e. the consequences of living “happily ever after.”

20

APRIL 1, 2004

DA KINE CALENDAR

DA KINECALENDAR BIG SHOWS

SKIRT

Na Leo - Saturday. Na Hoku Award-winning female trio performing contemporary Hawaiian music.

Tickets: $10-28. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

TICKETS ON SALE Baaba Maal - April 8. Afro-pop master and his Sengalese nine-piece band that combines traditional African sounds with reggae, rap, R&B and salsa.

Tickets: $26, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Taishokoto Matsuri with Ms. Akiyo Kato and Kinseiryu Ensemble - April 9. From popular children’s song to classical and popular music, the elegant and heartwarming sound of the Taishokoto is beloved by many in Japan. Free. 6 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC 242-7469.

The Second City - April 29. Chicago’s legendary comedy theater performances will feature some of the best sketches, songs and improvisations. Tickets: $32-$22. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

Celebrate Lei Day With The Brothers Cazimero - May 2. Remarkable entertainers, the Brothers are known for their absolutely beautiful harmonies and acoustic stylings. The award-winning performers will be joined on stage by kumu Hula Leina’ala Heine. Tickets: $35. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC 242-7469 .

BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria – John Kane, Wed, Thu and Fri; Harry Troupe, Sat; Kaleo Phillips, Sun; Benny Uyetake, Mon; Maurice Bega, Tue. All sets from 7:3010:30 p.m. 730 Front St., Lahaina, 661-0700.

Cheeseburger in Paradise – Brooks Maguire, Thu, Sat, Sun and Wed; Harry Troupe, Fri; Gail Swanson, Mon and Tue. All sets from 4:30-7:30 p.m. and 8-11 p.m. 811 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4855.

Cool Cat Cafe - Evan Schulman, Thu; Mike “Pelon,” Fri; Zach Schmidt, Sat; Damien Awai, Mon; How Phat, Wed. All sets 6:30 p.m. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 6670908.

Fish & Game Brewing Co. & Rotisserie -Brian Haia, Mon; Kawika Lum Ho Tu; Damien Awai, open mic night 10:30-1:30pm Wed; Nino Toscan Thu-Fri; Kawika Lum Ho Sat; Damien Awai Sun All sets from 6:30-9:30 p.m. 4405 Honoapiilani Highway, 669-3474.

Hula Grill - Kawika Lum and Albert & Billy, Mon; Jarret Roback and Albert & Billy, Tue; Ernest Pua’a and don, Brian & Damien, Wed; Ernest Pua’a and Bradah Brian & Don Th; Ernest Pua’a and & Kawika Lynn; Fr; Kawika Lum and Da Ukulele Boyz, Sat; Kawika Lum and Ryan Tanaka & Friends, Sun. 2435 Kaanapali Parkway, Building P, Kaanapali, 667-6636.

Java Jazz/Soup Nutz – Live music with Tracey and Farzad, Wed and Fri, 6:30-9 p.m. 3350 Lower Honoapiilani Rd., 667-0787.

EVENTS FRIDAY, ApRIl 2

Kimo’s – Sam Ahia, Wed thru Sun, 7-8:30 p.m. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4811.

Alicia Silverstone Comes To Maui - 7 p.m. at Paia Community Center, Hana Rd. The popular actress will speak about vibrancy and the sprit of living. She will decuss her secrets to beauty, good health and success. Free admission and food samples. For info, call 575-7694.

Leilani’s On The Beach – Crazy Fingers, Thu, 4-6 p.m.; JD & Mario, Fri, 2:30 -5:30 p.m.; Crazy Fingers Sat, 2:30-5:30 p.m.; Kilohana, Sun, 2:30-5:30 p.m; Kawika Lum Ho, Wed, 4-6 p.m. 2435 Kaanapali Parkway, Building J, Kaanapali, 661-4495.

Moose McGillycuddy’s - Greg & Steve, Thu; Llayne & Greg, Fri; Mark & Mike, Sat-Sun; Anastasia, Wed. All sets 6-9 p.m. 844 Front St., Lahaina, 667-7758.

SATURDAy, APRIl 3 Maui Culinary Academy's Special Food & Wine Luncheon - 10 a.m.-1 p.m. at the Fairmont Kea Lani. This year's event will be unique in many ways, such as "Grazing Style Action Food Stations"; "Wine Theme" for the evening matched to food stations and "Three Levels of Reservations." For info, call 878-3004.

Maui Contractors Womens Auxiliary Annual Garage Sale - 7 a.m.-12 p.m. at 1640 Halama Street, Kihei. Donations are welcome, all this year’s proceeds will be donated to A Keiki Dream and Children’s Justice Center. For info, call 879-5332.

Maui Wedding Association Bridal Fair - 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. at Queen Ka'ahumanu Center, Kahului.

Saturday only. For info, call 877-3369 ext 71.

Prince Kuhio Celebration - 9 a.m.-4 p.m. at the Paukakalo Hawaiian Homestead Park. This event includes live entertainment and food booths. Groups interested in putting up booths for fundraising are welcome. For info, call 242-6923.

Salsa Picante Social Club Dance Party - 7:309:30 p.m. at the Makawao Union Church Hall. Come dance on a wooden floor with lots of space,fun partners and hot music in a friendly environment. $10 includes class and party. For info, call 572-6127

DINNER MUSIC NEWS

COVER STORY

THURS After 9pm

WEAR A SKIRT & GET $2 DRINKS!

Cafe O’Lei - Steve Argenti, Tue-Fri 5:30-9 p.m. 839 Front St., Lahaina, 661-9491.

Kahana Terrace Restaurant – Harry Troupe, Tue and Thu; Randy Reno, Sat. All sets from 6-9 p.m.

Sands of Kahana Resort, 669-5399.

LETTERS

night

WEST MAUI

Pancho and Lefty’s Cantina & Restaurante Pianist Rene Alonzo & Friends play light rock, country and blues during happy hour on Thursday from 3-6 p.m. and this Saturday from 8-11 p.m. 658 Front St., Lahaina, in the Wharf Cinema Center, 661-4666.

Pioneer Inn – Ah-Tim Eleniki (Local-style guitar), Thu; 6-9pm Mon, Wed; Captain Billy Bones 6-8 pm; Tue; Ricardo Dioso 6-9 pm.,658 Wharf St., Lahaina, 6613636.

Reilley’s Steaks & Seafood - Live music (grand piano) 6-9 p.m., Gene Argelle, Mon and Tue; Joel Gold, Wed; Thu, Darrin Lenett, Fri. 2290 Kaanapali Parkway, Kaanapali, 667-7477.

Sea House Restaurant – Sun; Kapule Paoa 7 p.m., Mon, Fri, Sat; Kincade Basques 7-9 p.m. Tue; Polynesian dinner show 5:30 p.m., Wed,-Thu; 7-9 p.m.

Hawaiian music with Albert Kaina and Kincades. Napili Kai Beach Resort, 5900 Honoapiilani Road, Napili, 6691500.

Sir Wilfred’s at Whalers Villiage - Maui West Side Jazz, featuring some Maui’s greatest musicians, 2:30-5 p.m. 2435 Kaanapali Parkway, Lahaina, 6610202.

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505 FRONT STREET LAHAINA / 667-4051

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LA NIKA RHYTHM & BLUES - SOUL No Cover

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Whale’s Tale Bar & Grill - Eric Pietsch, Thu, Mon, ; Joe Bennett, Fri; Mario & Will, Sat; Anastasia & Niles, Sun. All sets from 6 to 9 p.m. 672 Front St., Lahaina, 6674044.

DINING

POOL TABLES LOUNGE TV’S

9pm

At the entrance to Ka’anapali Corner of Hwy & Ka’anapali Pkwy

SOUTH MAUI

SURF

Where the Locals “Hang Loose”

For info call 661-3160 FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

APRIL 1, 2004

21

BOCALINO

1279 S. Kihei Road, Kihei - 874-9299

BREAKWATER

900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-2266

thursday4/1

friday4/2

saturday4/3

sunday4/4

monday4/5 – wednesday4/7

DJ Boomshot, Disco, Funk No cover, 10pm

Neto Peraza, Latin, No cover, 10pm

Kilohana, Hawaiian contemporary, No cover, 10pm

Closed

Mon - Curtiss Williams & Guest; Tue - Jay Molina & Gilbert Emata w/Vanessa Rodriguez; Wed - Soul Concepts w/Curtiss Williams; All shows 10pm-1am, No cover

No information available

No information available

No information available

No information available

Daniel J / Justin $10 9:45pm

Sly Dog/ Hawaiian Homeboy $12, 9:45pm

Terri Garrison, No cover, 7:30

John Moore Project $3

CASANOVA

1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

CHARLEY’S RESTAURANT 142 Hana Hwy, Paia - 579-9453

Wed - Ladies’ Night, $5, 9:45pm

COMPADRES BAR & GRILL Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-7189

ERIK’S SEAFOOD & SUSHI

Lawai’a, No cover, 10:30pm-12:30am

Mon - Lawai’a, No cover, 10:30pm-12:30am

Salsa Night $5, 10pm

Tue - Twangers, No cover, 9pm

Rockin’ Sushi w/ACE’s Radio Rehab, No cover, 10pm

843 Wainee St., Lahaina - 662-8780

GIOVANNA’S

2291 Kaanapali Prkwy, Lahaina 661-3160

Open Mic Night, with Jim (Deviltown), 10pm

La Nika R&B, soul No cover, 10pm

Tiffany Lee and Josh No cover, 10pm

DJ DV One, 9pm

Liquid Lounge 9pm

HAPA’S NIGHTCLUB

41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-9001

No information available

Dr. Nat, Neto Peraza, 8pm - Close

Flava Zone

MON - Willie K; Tue - Fat Tuesday, w/Fat Joe, 10pm; WED - Aloha Wed

HARD ROCK CAFÉ

MON - Marty Dread, Reggae, $5, 10pm

900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

HENRY’S BAR & GRILL

Swami Bebops No cover, 9pm

41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-2849

JAWZ TACOS

1279 S. Kihei Rd. Azeka II - 874-8226

KAHALE’S BEACH CLUB

Da-Haw-Y-ans No cover, 9pm

36 Keala Place, Kihei - 875-7711

KAHULUI ALE HOUSE

Voodoo Suns No cover, 9pm

DJ Aloe Vera, Classic House No cover, 9pm

DJ Aloe Vera, Classic House No cover, 9pm

Kenny Roberts No cover, 9pm

El Nino, No cover, 7pm

No information available

355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

KIMO’S

Mark Burnett No cover, 10pm-12am

845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811

KOBE JAPANESE STEAKHOUSE 136 Dickenson St., Lahaina - 667-5555

MGD Band No cover, 9pm

The Carroll Brothers, No cover, 9pm-Midnight

Gina Martinelli, No cover, 6pm

Mon-Wed - Da-Haw-Y-ans, No cover, 6pm

Karaoke, No cover, 9:30pm

Wed - Karaoke, No cover, 9:30

Anastasa & Niles No cover, 10pm-12am

Karaoke w/Auntie Toddy Lilikoi, Karaoke w/Auntie Toddy Lilikoi, No cover, 9:30pm No cover, 9:30pm

LAHAINA COOLERS

Information not available

180 Dickenson St., Lahaina - 661-7082

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Make it a Memorable Evening • Dine and Dance at Casanova For dinner reservations call 572–0220 • Log on at casanovamaui.com 22

APRIL 1, 2004

DA KINE CALENDAR

PUREVOLUME

DA KINECALENDAR Capische? – Mark Johnston; Thu-Sat; Brian Cuomo Su, Tu, Wed; Sal & Estaire Godinez, Mon.; all sets 7-10 p.m. Diamond Resort, 555 Kaukahi, 879-2224.

Maalaea Grill – Benoit Jazz Works, Thu, Fri and Sun, 6:30-9 p.m.; Jimmy C Jazz, Sat, 7-9 p.m. Maalaea Village Shops, 243-2206.

Marco’s Southside Grill – Various artists (piano), Mon -Sun. All sets from 7-10 p.m. 1445 S. Kihei Rd., 874-4041.

Mulligan’s on the Blue – Fri ,Tue, Wailea Nights, Barry Flanagan & Eric Gilliom, dinner and show $35, 810p.m.; Celtic Tigers, Sun, 7-10 p.m., 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874-1131.

Seawatch Restaurant - Pianist Angela Carr, Fri, 6-9 p.m.; guitarist Luis Diaz, Sat, 6-9 p.m. 100 Wailea Golf Club Dr., 875-8080.

Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Café – Latin guitar w/ Luis Diaz, Wed-Fri; guitar and vocals w/ Brado, Sat; Brian Wittman Sun-Mon; Patrick Mayor, Tue All sets from 6-10 p.m. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983.

CENTRAL MAUI Mañana Garage – Neto & Friends, Thu and Fri, 6:30 p.m.; Fortunato’s Magic, Fri, 7 p.m.; Neto & Hot Salsa, Sat; Neto Peraza, Tue; Bobby & Tula, Wed, 6:30 p.m.

33 Lono Ave., Kahului, 873-0220.

UPCOUNTRY MAUI

Ka’anapali Beach Hotel 2525 Kaanapali Parkway, 661-0011

HALL & OATES

Kupanaha: Maui Magic for All Ages Illusions and dinner show Tue-Sat, 4:30 p.m., Kanahele Room; Lanui, live music and dancing, 6-9 nightly. Free hula show, 6:30-7:30 nightly; Sunday Champagne Brunch with Hawaiian music by Polinahe, 9 a.m.-1 p.m.

Kapalua Bay Hotel 1 Bay Drive, Kapalua, 669-5656 The Bay Club: Jazz trio, Fri and Sat, 6-9 p.m.; solo pianist, Sun-Thu, 6-9 p.m.; Gardenia Court: contemporary Hawaiian music, Sun, 9:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m.; Lehua Lounge: Free hula show nightly 5:30-7 and contemporary Hawaiian music 7-8:30.

Maui Marriott 100 Nohea Kai Drive, Kaanapali, 667-1200 Nalu’s: Kilohana, Wed, 8-10:30 p.m.

Hawaiian Music: Kincaid & Albert, Thu; Kincaid Basques Fri-Sat, Mon-Tue; Kapule Paoa, Sun; Albert Kaina, Wed; All Hawaiian music shows from 7-9 p.m.

Ritz-Carlton Kapalua One Ritz-Carlton Drive, Kapalua, 669-6200 Lobby Lounge: Live music, 6-10 nightly. Banyan Tree Restaurant: World fusion duo Ranga Pae, Fri-Tue, 6:15-9:45 p.m.

Royal Lahaina Resort 2780 Kekaa Drive, Kaanapali, 661-3611

Livewire Cafe - Mark Johnston, Tue 7-10 p.m. 137 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-6009.

"Eddie and Eddie" w/Eddie Lilikoi and Eddie Sebala, 5-9:30 nightly in the Royal Ocean Terrace. Royal Lahaina Luau featuring authentic Hawaiian and Polynesian song and dance at 5 nightly.

RESORT SHOWS WEST MAUI Embassy Vacation Resort – Kaanapali Beach 104 Kaanapali Shores, Lahaina, 661-2000 Ohana Bar & Grill: Live music, Thu & Wed; Patrick Major, Fri; Wayne & Friends, Sat; Scott Baird & Gretchen, Sun; Ernest Pua’a w/ Hawaiian music, Mon & Tue. All sets from 5:30-9:30 p.m. Torch lighting ceremony nightly.

SINEAD O’CONNOR “I DO NOT WANT WHAT I HAVEN’T GOT” This is the ultra swank pop-rock album Sinead O’ made before she became just another annoying bald white girl. And it’s been just about long enough to forget the torrential downpour of radio and MTV-play of that Prince cover “Nothing Compares to You” so that now we can actually appreciate it for its ingenuity. From the bewitching a cappella title track to a trip-hop version of an old Irish poem “I Am Stretched on Your Grave,” I Do Not Want What I Haven’t Got simply features gorgeous vocals like no other, with slow, moody orchestrations (“Feel So Different,” “Three Babies”), some surprising dance beats (“Emperor’s New Clothes,” “Jump in the River”) and a confrontationally intimate feeling that is easily forgivable due to Sinead’s vocal ability to bounce from beautiful to disturbing, angry to hopeful (“The Last Day of our Acquaintance”) in 2.0. Please, rediscover this one. You’ll be glad you did. —1990 Ensign Records

Sheraton Maui Hotel 2605 Kaanapali Parkway, 661-0031

JILL SCOTT

Lagoon Bar Entertainment w/hula dancers, 6-8 nightly: Bobby & Ralph, Thu, Mon and Tue; Ralph & Allan, Fri; Fausto & Kawaika, Sat and Sun; Nathan & Ralph, Wed; torchlighting and cliff diving ceremony at sunset, 7-8 nightly.

The Westin Maui Hotel 2365 Kaanapali Parkway, 667-2525 Colonnade Asian Noodle Cafe: Benny Uyetake, Thu-Fri, Tue-Wed; Mitch Kepa, Sun-Mon both 6-9 p.m.; Mitch Kepa, 5:30-8:30 p.m.

SOUTH MAUI

Hyatt Regency Maui 200 Nohea Kai Drive, Kaanapali, 661-1234 “Tony ‘n Tina’s Wedding” Tue, Thu, Sat, 6:30 p.m. at Spats Trattoria. Torchlighting ceremony at 6:15 nightly followed by live Hawaiian entertainment 6:309:30 nightly in the Weeping Banyan: Sam Fukuhara, Thu, Sun-Tue; Larry Gollis, Fri and Sat; Stephanie Anderson, Wed; "Drums of the Pacific" luau by Tihati, 5:30-8 nightly.

“ULTIMATE DARYL HALL + JOHN OATES” I mean, who doesn’t love the classic mid-’70s crooner “Sara Smile?” I know of at least two dear friends who were even named after this Hall & Oates classic. I also have another friend or two who swear that “Maneater” is their theme song. And “Method of Love?”—you know, they just don’t spell out song titles in songs enough these days. Anyway, this is a highly coveted two discs of 37 hits spanning 30 years of all the classic rock/pop/blue-eyed soul music of Hall & Oates.

Wow, 30 years? God, I’m old. You, too, can argue with your friends if it’s “you’re a bitch, girl” or “...rich girl!” Either way, there’s sax solos aplenty—another much underrepresented music trend today—and tons of catchy tunes you probably didn’t realize (or would admit) you knew the words to, so go ahead— sing along! It feels good and hey, don’t hold back your love. “Ooo… one on one, I wanna play that game toniiiight…” Awww yeahhhh. —BMG Music 2004

Napili Kai Beach Resort 5900 Honoapiilani Highway, Napili, 669-1500

Jacque’s - Mon, Mark Johnston w/ Dustin, ambient jazz; 120 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-8844.

Moana Cafe - Gypsy guitar w/ Bo Shores, Sun, 6-9 p.m.; vintage Hawaiian music, Wed, 6-9 p.m. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9999.

BY SAMANTHA CAMPOS

“WHO IS JILL SCOTT? WORDS AND SOUNDS VOL. 1” So smooth and dreamy—this R&B disc is meant to be listened to with low lighting, maybe a glass of cognac or wine, and either in chilltime alone or with someone you at least like. Initially a spoken word poet in Philadelphia, Jill Scott lusciously dishes out her goods as a strong, sexual woman on “Exclusivity” then just as suavely delivers the smackdown on a woman trying to make the moves on her man (“Gettin’ in the Way”). Deep and captivating, with slow groove beats and intelligent lyrics, this disc is on everyone’s top lists for 2000. Jill Scott’s singing voice is rich, feminine and soulful—the consistency of warm chocolate souffle (you know, the one with that hot, oozing core of... ahhh). —Hidden Beach 2000

Four Seasons Resort Wailea 3900 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 874-8000

AIR

Lobby Lounge, Hawaiian music w/Steve Repollo and Alan Villeran, Thu, 5:30-7:30 p.m. followed by jazz w/Sal Godinez and Marcus Johnson, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; contemporary music w/Clay Mortensen and George Tavoularis, Fri, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; island style trio, Sat and Mon, 5:30-

“TALKIE WALKIE” Much like their other stuff, Air’s latest album embarks on that digitally magic, high-KPSI Persian carpet ride into the cosmos. Parisian collaborators JB Dunckel and Nicolas Godin come back from their most successful Air release five years ago, Moon Safari, and a pretty forgettable 10,000hz Legend but pretty cool Virgin Suicides soundtrack, to do all the vocals on this current CD themselves, creating their signature romantic, ethereal electronic pop. Their song “Alone in Kyoto” was featured in the ennui-effective film Lost in Translation, which is probably the most brilliant partnership of unexplainable longing and moody music ever. Probably good make-out music for art students and people from Portland. —Astralwerks 2004 Got Music? If you’d like to share your thoughts on a great or not-so-hot CD you just bought, it’s show and tell time here at Maui Time Weekly! Just send your sage words of music opinions to 658 Front St., Ste. 126A-7278, Lahaina, HI, 96761 or email me at sam@mauitime.com. Rock on! MTW

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

APRIL 1, 2004

23

thursday4/1

friday4/2

LIFE’S A BEACH

Steve Mendoza No cover

Optimysics No cover

Prankster No cover

John Moore Project No cover

LOBBY LOUNGE

Jazz w/Sal Godinez & Marcus Johnson, 8:30-11:30pm

Clay Mortensen & George Tavoularis, 8:30-11:30pm

Tiffany Lee & Josh, 8:30-11:30pm

Pam Peterson & Rudy Baria, 8:30-11:30pm

Mon - Tiffany Lee & Josh, 8:30-11:30pm; Wed - Clay Mortensen & Gilbert Emata, 8:30-11:30pm

Crazy Fingers, $5, 9:30pm N/A, $5, 9:30pm

N/A, $5, 9:30 pm Crazy Fingers, $5, 9:30pm

No information available

No information available

No information available

Service Industry Night

Mon - S.I.N., Service industry night; Wed - Karaoke night, w/Tyrone, 8-11pm

DJ Mackie Mac, No cover, 8:30pm

DJ Mackie Mac No cover, 8:30pm

DJ Big Daddy Steve No cover, 8:30pm

DJ Tark, No cover, 8:30pm

Mon - DJ Mackie Mac, No cover, 8:30pm; Tue - DJ Mackie Mac/Dollar Night, $5, 8:30pm; Wed - DJ Mackie Mac, No cover, 8:30pm

Kenny Roberts No cover, 9pm

Wailea Nights, Barry Flanagan & Eric Gilliom, $10, 8pm

Murry Thorne $5, 9pm

Merv Oana, No cover, 10 pm

Mon - Gypsy Pacific, No cover, 7pm; Tue - “Wailea Nights”w/Barry Flanagan & Eric Gilliom, $35 dinner, $10 show, 8-10pm; Wed - Open Mic Night, No cover, 9pm

Live Jazz, No cover, 9pm-Midnight

Live Jazz, No cover, 9pm-Midnight

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891–8010

Four Seasons Resort, Wailea - 874-8000

LONGHI’S 888 Front St., Lahaina - 667-2288 LONGHI’S Shops at Wailea - 891-8883 LULU’S

1945-H S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-9944

MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDY’S 844 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7758

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea - 874-1131

PACIFIC’O

505 Front St., Lahaina - 667-4341

saturday4/3

THURS 4/1

FRI 4/2

sunday4/4

SAT 4/3

monday4/5 – wednesday4/7 Mon - Open Jam; No cover, Tue - DJ Tony, No cover, 8 pm Wed - Crunch Pups, No cover

SUN 4/4

D 4/7E E W E 4/6 KARAOKAYS MON 4/5 TU i Tin WEDNESuD’s Star!

MERV MARGARITAVILLE THE MONSTER Tuesdays Be a LuL S.I.N. WILLY’S PROJECT NIGHT MONDAYS cks OANA THEMARGARITAS $3 Be $ $3 $5(ANY FLAVA) $ SPECIALS! $ r SK flavo i 3 TOO MANY Any ff Martin IHE no TO MENTION Smir $3 CORONAS R I RD E T S N PACIFICOS MO • 879ANY HOUR HAPPY HOUR! DRINKS COVER BAND

COORS LT DRAFT

9944

Seafood Restaurant & Sushi Bar Late Night Specials 10pm to 1am – 21 & over with I.D.

50% OFF SUSHI & APPETIZERS FREE KARAOKE - DRAFT BEER SPECIALS

KIHEI, THURSDAY - SATURDAY

EARLY BIRD SPECIAL 5:30pm to 6:00pm DAILY

Kapalua 669-6286 • Kihei 879-0004 The Shops at Kapalua

24

APRIL 1, 2004

DA KINE CALENDAR

Near Foodland

STEINLAGER DRAFT

$3 LULUTINI • $2 COORS DRAFT

3 3

8-11pm

★

DA KINECALENDAR 7:30 p.m. w/hula dancer 5:30-6:30 p.m.; Pam Peterson and Rudy Baria, Sun, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; Tiffany Lee and Josh Mon and Sat, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; Clay Mortensen and Gilbert Emata, Wed, 8:30-11:30 p.m. Sunset torchlighting nightly.

Grand Wailea Resort Hotel & Spa 3850 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 875-1234 Botero Bar entertainment, 5:30-9:30 nightly: Larry Golis, Thu; Brian Mansano, Fri; Ricardo, Sat; Luis Diaz, Sun thru Tue; Mitch Kepa, Wed; Strolling Hawaiian duo in the Humuhumunukunukuapua’a nightly.

14 will ride through an obstacle course set up by the Maui Police Department Bicycle Patrol Officers. Keiki must bring their own bikes. For info, call 873-0400.

YMCA Healthy Kids Day & Family Carnival Sat 10 a.m.-2 p.m. at 250 Kanaloa Avenue in Kahului.

Activities that are planned include attractions from “Fun on the Run” and a mobile climbing wall, along with family competitions and carnival games as well as music, food and entertainment throughout the day.

For info, call 242-9007.

The Fairmont Kea Lani Maui 4100 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 875-4100 Jazz entertainment from 6-9 nightly in the Lobby Bar.

Send your listings & photos

Wailea Marriott 3700 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 879-1922

for the Da Kine Calendar to

Hawaiian entertainment w/hula 6-9 nightly in Kumu Bar & Grill. Hawaiian entertainment 9-11 nightly in the Mele Mele Lounge featuring Pam Gamboa Peterson Mon and Sat, Mitch Kepa & Raymond "Mundo" Medeiros. Paradyse & Ka Poe O Hawaii perform at the Luau, Mon, Tue, Thu and Fri.

calendar@mauitime.com or fax (808) 661-0446

Renaissance Wailea Beach Resort 3550 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 879-4900 Sunset Terrace; Live music by Lono, Thu; Brado Mamalias, Fri; Rama Camarillo, Sat-Sun; Bobby Krueger, Mon-Wed; all sets 6-9 p.m. Wailea Sunset Luau, Tue, Thu and Sat, 6-8:30 p.m.

Maui Prince Hotel 5400 Makena Alanui, 874-1111 Molokini Lounge: Ron Kuala’au, Hawaiian and contemporary guitar and vocals, Sun, 6-10:30 p.m. and Tue, Thu and Sat, 6-8:30 p.m. Mele ‘Ohana duo, Mon, Wed. and Fri, 6-8 p.m., Mon-Sat, 8:30-10:30 p.m. and Mon, Wed and Fri, 9 a.m.-1 p.m.

EAST MAUI Hotel Hana-Maui Hana, 248-8211 Hawaiian music in Paniolo Lounge, Thu thru Sun, 6:30-9:30 p.m.; Hula show, every Thu and Sun, 7:30-8:15 p.m. in the Main Dining Room.

9 PM - CLOSE

PoliTicAl Candidate Johnny Jackson For Maui County Council in 2004 - Thu, April 8, 5:30-7:30 p.m. at Hapa’s, Kihei. Johnny Jackson will be speaking on several different issues, such as affordable rentals, homes and daycare along with care for the elderly. For info, call 280-4174.

DRINK SPECIALS 007 UV Orange with sprite and a splash of OJ Forget the martini, this is how James gets the ladies

lECTURES

STRAWBERRY CHEESECAKE UV Vanilla with pineapple & cranberry

Why Whales Do That - Daily, 12:45 and 3:15 p.m.

Ocean Science Discovery Center in Ma’alaea. Free presentation focusing on the intriguing behavior of Hawaii’s humpback whales. For info, call 249-8811.

Presentation on "Cholesterol 101" - Mon, 68:30 p.m. at the Cameron Center Auditorium. Dr. George Talbot will speak about how heart health is affected by different factors such as cholesterol.

Followed by a demonstration by John Cadman. For info, call 270-7308.

KEIki HAEYC - Children's Fair - Sat, 10 a.m. at Maui Mall. Keiki can enjoy a day of fun-filled activities, including entertainment, crafts and much more. For info, call 872-4320.

Bicycle Safety Rodeo for Children - Sat, 8-11 a.m. at Maui Marketplace, Kahului. Children up to age

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

GRANNY SMITH UV apple and sprite...better than pie

CHERRY BOMB UV Cherry with sour mix

ALL UV VODKA DRINKS

$2.75 MILLER LIGHT 14 oz Light Draft: $2.25 Light Bottles: $2.75 MANAPUA EATING CONTEST FOR UV & MILLER PRIZES

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

APRIL 1, 2004

25

thursday4/1

saturday4/3

DJ Lucky Brown $3, 9pm

Kindred Spirit $5, 9pm

Gomega $5, 9pm

Karaoke, 10pm-1am Karaoke, 10pm-1am

Karaoke, 10pm-1am Karaoke, 10pm-1am

Karaoke, 10pm-1am Karaoke, 10pm-1am

Cruch Pups, No cover, 9:30pm

The Perfect Storm No cover, 9:30pm

Kenny Roberts & Friends No cover, 9:30pm

Twangers $3, 9pm

Evolution $3, 9pm

DJ Dancing, $10, 9:30pm-2am

DJ Dancing, $10, 9:30pm-2am

SANDBAR & GRILL

89 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8742

SANSEI 115 Bay Dr., Kapalua - 669-6286 SANSEI Kihei Town Center - 879-0004

friday4/2

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR 2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-0602

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR 1127 Makawao Ave. - 572-1380

TSUNAMI NIGHTCLUB

3850 Wailea Alanui Dr. - 875-1234

Custom Tattoos

Pain Free

Specializing in wedding video production & photography

9:30

THE HALE & BAND A V R Sun 4/4 HOT LNA O COVE 9:30 E ECLIPS 6 ER / V 4 O C s O e N Tu 9:30 YSTICS OPTYM 7 / 4 OVER C d e O N W 9:30

TOLL FREE 877_572_1347

www.mauiweddingmedias.com

HRC MAUI 900 Front St., Lahaina Info: 808.667.7400

SAT, APRIL 3RD

SPRING BREAK PARTY! NO COVER

MON, APRIL 5TH

MARTY DREAD $5 COVER

SAT, APRIL 10TH

3pm - 6pm 2411 S. Kihei Rd. 879-0602

26

APRIL 1, 2004

DA KINE CALENDAR

Mon - Mark Johnston Trio, No cover, 9pm; Tue - The Crunch Pups, No cover, 9pm; Wed - Pool Tournament, No cover, 8pm

Hale & The Hot Lava Band No cover, 9:30pm

Tue - Eclipse, No cover, 9:30pm; Wed - Optymystics, No cover, 9:30pm

WED 3/31 • LIFE’S A BEACH • 9PM-12MID • KIHEI THURS 4/1 • SPORTS PAGE • 9PM-12MID • KIHEI MON 4/4 • MOOSES • 6PM-9PM • LAHAINA WED 4/6 • LIFE’S A BEACH • 8PM-12MID • KIHEI

REGGAE AT THE ROCK WITH

HAPPY HOUR DAILY

DJ Boomshot Reggae, $3 9pm

TUES 4/5 • SANDBAR & GRILL • 9PM-12MID • PAIA

E E V I V E L I V L I L SIIC C C S U I U S M MU M

UPS UNCHERP R C 1 / 4 NO COV Thurs 9:30 M IC STOR E PACIF H T R 2 E / V 4 O Fri NO C 9:30 OBERTS ENNY R K IENRDS & FR Sat 4/3 E NO COV

monday4/5 – wednesday4/7

40

$

12-9pm Mon-Sat Sun by appointment

193 Lahainaluna, Lahaina • 667-2156

sunday4/4

$ COVER

HAPPY HOUR! 3-6pm & 10pm-12am EXCEPT SPECIAL EVENTS h a r d r o c k . c o m

PLAYING SONGS BY:

THE CLASH • THE CURE • VIOLENT FEMMES AND MUCH MORE!

BAND ADS • EASY • AFFORDABLE • EFFECTIVE

FOR INFO CALL 661-3786

TwâÄà fxÜä|vxá PRIVATE LINGERIE SHOWS Your Location, 38dd petite, sexy mocha model. Adult phone svc. cc req. 1-866672-6337

Miss Genieva For Enchanting Titillating Touch

TOTALLY RELAX AND LET GO Come and experience my wonderful touch. Very sensuous, enjoyable & healing. 250-4557 CLUB TANTRA Pairs Only, Saturdays 7pm, 244-4103.

Tantra loving demos, coached practice, then intimate party. Clubtantrahi@aol.com

A place of Magic An hour of Pleasure A date with Beauty Sensual Bodywork

808.269.0814

Sexy, Sassy, Sensual Goddess

SCULPT-U BODYWORKS A deeply relaxing hour of exquisite bodywork 250-4817

281-9448 In/Out Call

To Honor & Nurture You

Tantric Healing Bodywork

Susan 276-7706

Tantric Loving Bodywork

INANNA

Sensual Island Goddess to nurture your body, mind & spirit

Experience Bliss 875-2980

264-6325

PARADISE SPICE!

Where Progressive & Sophisticated Adults Shop!

MAUI’S ADULT SUPERSTORE Voted #1 by our Cutting Edge Adult Toys & Novelties Customers

OPEN DAILY

New Releases on Videos & DVDs

1.900.226.0169

10am–Midnight 10am–7pm Sundays

Lubes, Lotions, Aphrodisiacs Largest Selection of Adult Magazines

BOOK YOUR AD TODAY! Call 661-3786x5 by 4 pm on Monday to get your ad in Maui Time Weekly!

CHARGE IT!

Lingerie for Men & Women

Maui Time Weekly accepts credit cards for classified and display ads

Gay/TG Friendly Preview Arcade

WOMEN Seeking Men MAUI CHICK This nice, caring, outgoing 20-year-old chick smoker, with one son, wants a Maui boy, 19-21, who's looking for a long-term relationship. Friendship first. 826791 BEAUTIFUL CREATIVE SOUL Looking for successful, secure, upbeat, N/S SWM, 40-55, to enjoy the island beauty, share long walks, inspiring talks, memorable meals and sensational sunsets.

616262 LOCAL KINE GRINDZ 26-year-old professional SF, likes movies, beach activities, and working with children.

Looking fun, sociable, smart, funny man, 28-38, N/S, for friendship, fun times, and hopefully more. 848870 ATHLETIC BEAUTY Attractive, athletic, open-minded SWF, loves swimming, kayak surfing, salsa dancing. Seeking financially secure, sweet, romantic, open-minded, conscious, athletic man, 35-45, w/good sense of humor, who loves surfing and travel. 821455 UP FOR SPORTS Petite, hazel-eyed fox in search of hunting dog for adventures in the woods.

827182

Heaven Sent

We’re not a Shack, We’re not a Boutique, We’re not a Tourist Trap!

We are

TO LISTEN & RESPOND TO ADS USING A CREDIT CARD, CALL

TO LISTEN & RESPOND TO ADS, CALL

Sexy Girls

357-2266

Unconditional love from the heart in or out call

HOT DELIGHTS In/Out Call 281-2872

1.800.710.8735

1.800.721.0152

CALL COSTS $1.99/MIN. MUST BE 18+

GET LUCKY TONIGHT! Meet Island Singles!

18+ 808-521-6696. Ad# 4003 CELEBRATE SACRED SEXUALITY Weekend playshops monthly, starting April 2-4. Celebrate love and passion, playful tantric energy exchanges, partnering, lovemaking, compassionate communication. Connect deeper with your partner or find new love; ideal for beginners.

244-4103 (Janet) www.schooloftantra.com

TO BECOME A MEMBER, CALL

579–6400

Invites you to play

MEET HOT SINGLES Connect locally. 18+ 808-521-6696.

Ad#4288

visit us online at www.mauitimepersonals.com

My Secret Garden

MEN Seeking Women DON'T MISS THIS CATCH SWM, 35, 5'8", 155lbs, brown/brown, intelligent, very active, athletic build, loves playing hockey, traveling, learning. Seeking smart, active, fun, positive SF, 22-44, can keep up with me. 968405 MAYBE US? SWM, 39, 6'1", brown hair, N/S, with good sense of humor, enjoys golfing, jogging.

Seeking smart, positive woman, 28-45, for possible LTR. 476538 LET'S MEET SWM, 48, likes yoga, old world singing, kayaking, traveling, hiking. Seeking mature, open-minded, fun SF, 40-55, similar interests, friendship first, possible LTR. 603730

To pay for our services using a check, call 1-800-252-0920 ALOHA LADIES! SWM, 33, 5'9", 195lbs, light brown/hazel Capricorn, N/S, loves surfing, diving, the outdoors. Seeking fun woman, 18-40, for hanging out, dancing, beach walking, and more. 811772 A NICE RELATIONSHIP SWM, 51, employed, enjoys arts, movies, church and more. Seeking WCF, 30-40, N/S, for LTR. 393268 ALL FOR YOU Male, 34, short black/dark brown, medium build, works for a delivery warehouse company. Seeking a woman, 5'2"-5'8", medium build. 949288 LAID-BACK SWM, 28, in service industry, Pisces, smoker, is looking to share beach walks, romantic dinners, and perhaps a bottle of wine with a woman, 21-31. 949876 ARE YOU LOOKING? Can you see me? Can you see what's inside my heart? Look a little deeper. SBM, 45, Leo, N/S, seeks woman, 32-50.

952237 MAUI ISLAND INVENTOR SWM, 36, likes outdoor activities. Seeking SWF, 18-37, for adventurous, fun times together. Let's rock! 926297 LOOKS GOOD, FEELS GOOD SM, 23, 5'8", short hair, easygoing, works in construction, in great shape. Seeking SF, 18-55, for fun times, friendship, possibly more. 967884 QUALITY TIMES AHEAD SAM, 48, good-looking, tall, educated, stable, government employee, pleasant personality. Looking for a pretty, slim, feminine SF, 30-45, has a good heart, for movies, dinner dates, more. 910486 IN SHORT This Maui man, 5'9", 175lbs, brown/blue, seeks an outgoing, spontaneous woman, with whom to pair up. 877287 HUNGRY? Male, 40, 5'9", 160lbs, in good shape, somewhat athletic, brown/brown, pastry chef and car rental agent, smoker, seeks companionship with a beautiful woman, 20-40.

860511

ALL I WANT SAM, 46, Sagittarius, smoker, seeks WF, 25-49, smoker, who loves to party, for friendship and casual dating. 862808 ARE YOU OUT THERE? SM, 40, 5'9", 200lbs, long dark hair, hazel eyes, seeks fun-loving, non-judgmental lady, mid-20s to mid-30s, for sharing good times and happiness. 858448 COMPLETE ME SWM, 46, 5'11", average build, Libra, N/S, business owner, single dad, enjoys surfing, seeks woman, 30-45, N/S, for LTR. 822467

MEN Seeking Men OUTGOING AND FUN Nice Filipino SM, 18, laid-back, likes tennis, volleyball, cruising, partying, being around people. Seeking sweet, nice, outgoing man, 18-30. 717672 I WANNA HOLD YOUR HAND SWM, 29, 5'10", 170lbs, brown/brown, likes to keep fit and healthy. Seeking a man to hold hands and conversations with.

652064 MUSIC IN MY BLOOD Open to anything! Laid-back male, 24, smoker, interested in playing/writing music, loves cruising. Open to kicking it with GM, 18-25, with similar interests. 548742

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For customer service call 1-617-450-8773 or email MauiTime@placepersonal.com ABBREVIATIONS: A-Asian; B-Black; C-Christian; D-Divorced; F-Female; G-Gay; H-Hispanic; J-Jewish; M-Male; N/S-Non-Smoker; P-Professional; S-Single; W-White GUIDELINES: Personals are for adults 18 or over seeking monogamous relationships. To ensure your safety, carefully screen all responses and have first meetings occur in a public place. This publication reserves the right to edit, revise, or reject any advertisement at any time at its sole discretion and assumes no responsibility for the content of or replies to any ad. Not a service of all ads have corresponding voice messages. To review our complete guidelines, call (617) 425-2636

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

APRIL 1, 2004

27

AUTOMOTIVE AUTOMOTIVE SERVICES MOTORCYCLE & MOPED REPAIR Great Service, Top Quality Work and Competitive Rates. Behind the Train Station in Lahaina. Spencer’s Cycles, 264-2545

PRIZM Auto Detailing “ONLY PROFESSIONAL QUALITY PRODUCTS USED” PRICES STARTING AT...

• CARS & SMALL TRUCKS $90 • SUVs, FULL SIZE TRUCKS $100 FOR A FULL DETAIL

35

$ WAS

Iinnclu des : wa sh, vac uum ,, wh eels , tire s&

CAR

H

wwinin ddoow wss

MUSIC EQUIPMENT DJ’s Delight 2 Technic 1200mk2 turntables, Vestax PMC-270a mixer, and 2 Ortofon Concordes for only $1000. 280-6968

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES FREE $795. BUSINESS SYSTEM Start your own Direct Mail Business at home without leaving your job. Call (808) 573-3375

CALL KELI’I at 276-3738

BUBBA GUMP SHRIMP COMPANY is accepting applications for the following positions:

Kitchen Line Cooks, Host(ess), Waitstaff and Retail Sales Qualified applicants will have the following: An outgoing, fun personality, good references, a desire to work hard and have fun.

Apply in person 889 Front St. Lahaina, 2-4pm

A $250K+ 1st YEAR A $250K+ 1st Year Income Opportunity. Home based. No selling.

COOL CAT CAFE Not MLM! Call 1-877-347-3745 * 24 Servers, Hosts, Hostesses & Cook hrs. Training & Support Provided. needed. Apply in-person at 658 Front OLD ALBUMS 4 SALE Moving & must sell this great collec- (AAN CAN) Street, 3rd Floor, Lahaina tion of old record albums. 4 boxes priced to sell. 808-661-3964. $$CASH$$ “Money and Power Cash now for structured settlements, influences Politicians!” annuities, and insurance payouts. 800- The Power Should Be Ours. Earn 794-7310. J.G. Wentworth.... JG. Money as a GrassRoots Lobbyist. FREE WENTWORTH MEANS CASH NOW MEMBERSHIP. GrassrootsLobby.com FOR STRUCTURED SETTLEMENTS. (AAN CAN) DATA ENTRY •coins •tokens •medals work from home. Flexible hours!

•paper money •stamps Great Pay! Computer required/ 1-800382-4282, ext. #1. (AAN CAN) •Hawaiiana •sport collectibles WARREN & ANNABELLE’S Maui’s most fun and amazing show is looking to add: P/T SERVER (Male & female) Must 3rd floor Wharf Cinema Ctr. CAREER POSITIONS have great personality & neat Earn $12-$48 an hour. Full Benefits, appearance. paid training on Homeland Security, HOUSEKEEPER $10/hour Applications available Mon-Fri 9 am- Law Enforcement, Wildlife, Clerical, 4pm Warren & Annabelle’s 900 Front Administrative and more. 1-800-320St., Lahaina No phone calls or faxes 9353 ext. 2560. (AAN CAN)

BUY & SELL

ISLAND COINS & STAMPS WE BUY & SELL

EMPLOYMENT

283-7725

CLASSIFIEDS

PLACING AN AD IS EASY! CALL 661-3786

28

667- 6155

& SELL$ $BUY JEWELRY . ART HAWAIIANA . CD’S MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS MISCELLANEOUS

WEST MAUI GOLD 667-7689 1000 LIMAHANA PL. LAHAINA

please.

SURFING INSTRUCTOR Part-Time+, minimum 10 years surfing experience. Own car necessary for equipment transport. Maui resident with professional references.

CPR & First-Aid Certified, Call 6624445

Ad Deadline Monday 4pm To Advertise Call 661-3786 Fax Number 808.661-0446 Email classifieds@mauitime.com Website www.mauitime.com Mailing 658 Front Street #126A-7278 • Lahaina, HI Drop off 505 Front St. Ste. 216, Lahaina

APRIL 1, 2004

CLASSIFIED

UNEMPLOYED? Healthcare for the entire family, $89.95 monthly. No age restrictions, includes dental, Vision, pre-existing conditions accepted, unlimited usage, 500,000+ doctors, 800-528-4052, limited time offer.

(AAN CAN)

COOL TRAVEL JOB Entry level positions, 18+, no experience necessary, 2 weeks paid training, transportation, lodging provided. $500 signing bonus to start. TOLL FREE 1888-272-2732. (AAN CAN)

“MOVIE EXTRAS” $200-$600/day. All looks, types & ages. No experience required. TV, music videos, film, Commercials.

Work with the best. 1-800-260-3949 Ext. 3560 (AAN CAN) WILDERNESS CAMP COUNSELOR Challenge yourself, learn and grow while helping at risk youth turn their lives around. Make friends, make a difference. Year-round residential positions, free room/ board. Details online: www.eckerd.org. Or send resume: Career Advisor/ AN, Eckerd Youth Alternatives, PO Box 7450, Clearwater, FL 33758. EOE. (AAN CAN) USCG 100GT Master License, Paddi Dive Master, Certified Yoga Instructor seeks parttime in any or all fields, West Maui, Impeccable References, Reliable.

Start 6/1/04 or earlier Call Greg at 949872-5610 or email greg@rswlaw.net

$ MODELS WANTED $ For calendar magazine and artistic Interested in print work. Ages 18 to 35. 573-3712 Political Careers?

Learn from professionals. Gain organBARTENDERS UP TO $1000 izing experience on high profile camPER WEEK! paigns to beat Bush through the Democratic Campaign Management Bartender Positions Available. FT/PT. Program. www.campaignschool.org. No Experience Required. Call 1-800806-0083 ext. 202. (AAN CAN) 888-922-1008. (AAN CAN)

Looking For A Little Experience?

Is Seeking Interns.

Entry level positions. High school students okay. We will train.

• Must Be Bright & Adaptable • School Credit Possible

• Work With A Fun Team • Gain Valuable Experience

Send resume to: Jen Russo 658 Front St. #126A-7278, Lahaina HI 96761 or call 661-3786 x3#

CLASSIFIED LINE AD RATES 5 lines included – approx. 140 characters

Frequencies of 1-8weeks Frequencies of 9-26weeks Frequencies of 27-52weeks

$15/week* $11/week* $8/week*

Additional lines are $3 per each - bold and/or caps are $3 per line *Does not apply to Backside or Adult Services. Please call for pricing details.

MUSIC & ARTS MUSICIANS WANTED GUITARIST NEEDED For All-Original Rock Band. Gigs, Touring. 250-6170

MUSICAL INSTRUCTION The Vocal Studio Want to take your singing and music to the next level?

Voice Teacher & Vocal Coach Karyn Sarring Over 28 years teaching Beginners to Professionals All styles - Indies/major labels

✴

EXPOSE YOURSELF! With one simple phone call, you can reach up to 15 million young, active and educated readers in more than 100 newspapers just like this one. Go to www.aancan.com or call this newspaper for more information.

(AAN CAN)

ALOHA VALUED READERS We would like to let our readers know that we try to screen most of our ads. We read back the ad copy to LICENSED ensure that it is the correct informaELECTRICIAN tion that advertisers want. If you see affordableelectricalandplumbing.com the acronym (AAN CAN) that ad is a Consulting, Design & Installation. national ad and was not submitted 283-4413 directly to us. If you have a question directly concerning AAN CAN, please check out aancan.org out aancan.org

SERVICES

FREE Recycling Bins – And No Sign-up Fee!

Call 808 205-1241

244-0443 • www.mauirecycles.com

Learn to Sing

ISLAND ANIMAL CLINIC

S. & W. MAUI CONDOS

• Options When Singing • Survival Techniques & More Beginners to Advanced Develop Your Perfect Voice

from

Love Your Pet! See Your Vet!

$119,000

(808) 250-1484 www.nickdamis.com

from

Cynthia Jo Trawick, DVM

LARGE & SMALL ANIMALS Preventive Medicine, Surgery, Dentistry, Flea & Tick Control

W. & S. MAUI HOMES

CALL NOW FOR MORE INFO:

Haiku Market Place • 575-2811

$375,000

FANTASTIC CLEANING SERVICES We want to clean your office, house, condo units! Please call 205-7036.

You’ll see & feel the difference!

Surf the Maui MLS Listings at www.barrybrownmaui.com Barry Lee Brown (R) P.O. Box 11782 • Lahaina

(808) 661-1800

AD DEADLINE MONDAY 4PM

SHARED HOUSING, ROOMMATES

BLUE PAPAYA PRODUCTIONS Digital Recording Studio, Red Book Masters(Radio Quality), CD Graphic Design, Duplication & Packaging, Reasonable Rates. 250-2240 or 5727166

MAUI RECYCLING SERVICE Picks up all your glass, plastic, aluminum, tin, mixed paper, & cardboard.

ALL AREAS Home Pickup; a convenience for ROOMMATE.COM. Bi-monthly pick up.

Browse hundreds of online listings $16/mo! with photos and maps. Find your Commercial accounts avail. Call Now! roommate with a click of the mouse! 244-0443 Visit: www.Roommate.com (AAN CAN)

HIV COUNSELING AND TESTING

SPACE WANTED

NOTICES Healthcare for entire family $89.95 monthly. No age restrictions, includes dental, Vision, pre-existing conditions accepted, unlimited usage, 500,000+ doctors, 800-832-9542, limited time offer. (AAN CAN) HEALTHCARE FOR ENTIRE FAMILY $89.95 monthly. No age restrictions, includes dental, Vision, pre-existing conditions accepted, unlimited usage, 500,000+ doctors, 800-738-1916, limited time offer. (AAN CAN)

LOOKING FOR A HOME IN UPCOUNTRY MAUI Sell your home to someone who will show respect for the property.

Hoping to find the personal home in Kula, Makawao or Pukalani. $450K-$750K price range Call 808-572-2839 or 808-384-8841 Ask for Moon-Sun Kang R (S) email moon-sun@diplomats.com

VACATION RENTALS

ORAL/HIV TESTING/ CLEAN, AFFORDABLE COUNSELING CLINIC Accommodations in our vacation @ Pukalani Community Center rental from $49 per day. Call Toll Free Wednesdays 9-11am; Paia Hawaiian Wailuku Guesthouse 877-986-8270 or Protestant Church Wednesdays 1- www.wailukuhouse.com 3:30pm; Wailuku Health Center Tuesdays 8-12pm & 1-4pm; Lahaina SERVICES Comprehensive Health Center Thursdays 9am-12pm: Kihei Keolahou Congregational Church Mondays 11am-2pm. Community Clinic of Maui-Wailuku office Thursdays 1:30pm-3:30pm. Results returned in 2 wks. Sponsored by State Dept. of Health, for more info call Takako 9842129

If you feel that you have been potentially exposed to HIV and would like Free, Confidential and Anonymous testing call the Maui AIDS Foundation at 242-4900.

It is important to know your HIV status so that you do not unknowingly pass the virus to others, also early detection is vital to your health and treatment.

The Maui AIDS Foundation now offers Drop-In HIV Counseling and Testing (No appointment necessary) Drop in hours are Mon.-Fri. 8:30am to 4:30pm, Wed. 8:30am to 7pm 1935 Main Street, Wailuku For more information on HIV/AIDS, STD’s including Viral Hepatitis and HIV Counseling and Testing call the Maui AIDS Foundation at 242-4900.

In Hana call 248-7801, Lanai 5656722, and Molokai 553-9086.

TO ADVERTISE Call 661-3786

CLASSIFIEDS

MUSICIAN SERVICES

April Fool’s Day. You may be in enough of a humorous mood to play a joke on someone, too. The full moon on Sunday and Monday highlights romance, partnerships and negotiations of every kind.

TAURUS: Your imagination is ready to be expressed in a creative way. Trust is essential when you’re navigating ambiguities and uncertainties. Believe in your art. Let what you do reflect the highest values of your heart.

GEMINI: It’s time to rub elbows with those you wish to know better. It’s also a good time to plan for the future. You’re likely to push boundaries and limits with your newfound sense of freedom. Be aware of how your decisions affect those around you.

CANCER: Sometimes it’s good to deny temporary pleasure for a noble goal. Sometimes indulging in vices can be robbing oneself of future good health. Good leaders lead by example. The full moon pushes all of your emotional buttons. You’ll be dealing with family.

LEO: You need a break from your usual routine. Try a different mode of transportation to work. This could mean skateboarding, biking, walking, kayaking or taking the bus. Get up early enough to smell the flowers. The full moon helps you to appreciate your environment.

VIRGO: With the moon in Virgo Thursday evening through Saturday evening, you’ll be able to catch up on any cleaning or organizing that you need to do. You’ve got potential to show off your talents. The full moon has you yearning for more sensual pleasures.

LIBRA: The moon will be in Libra from late Saturday night through Monday. It will be full early Monday. The relationship between Aries and Libra is like beauty and the beast. You need to be a little more beastly for the rest of us to fully enjoy your beauty.

SCORPIO: It’s that time of year when you cruise gymnasiums and health food stores looking for a potential lover. The wealth that comes from health needs to be shared not hoarded.

The full moon expands your dreams and shows you the people you have karma with.

SAGITTARIUS: Your capacity for having fun is at an annual high. Your most creative heart space needs to be honored. Attend to your garden, play with your children and delight in lovers. The full moon brings opportunities for parties and social gatherings.

CAPRICORN: When you’re flat on your back, the only way you can look is up. To fall seven times is to rise eight. Your memories can help you heal your past. Being grateful for your parents in spite of their imperfections is important. The full moon will affect your work.

AQUARIUS: Poetry and song are intelligent ways of getting a controversial message across without offending the offensive party.

Charitable causes continue to need your support. The full moon urges an exotic getaway or a spontaneous musical jam session.

PISCES: In order to obtain something, one often has to give something else up. You’ll be tempted to spend money on home furnishings. An old cable spool can make a great table. Be innovative and imaginative with your resources. The full moon spotlights spirituality and sexuality.

CURBSIDE RECYCLING! When you subscribe for 3 months of bi-weekly service – (A $25 value!)

New customers only – offer expires 4/30/04

FAX NUMBER 808.661-0446 EMAIL classifieds@mauitime.com

WEBSITE www.mauitime.com

MAILING 658 Front Street #126A-7278 Lahaina, HI 96761

✴ ✴

✴

✴

✴✴

DROP OFF 505 Front St. Ste. 216, Lahaina

A public health message provided by The Maui AIDS Foundation.

CHARGE IT! Maui Time Weekly accepts credit cards for classified and display ads

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

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A&E

FILM

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BY KOZMIC KEV

ARIES: Lovers may try to play a joke on you for

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

APRIL 1, 2004

29

HOLOHOLOGIRL

BY SAMANTHA CAMPOS

Taking a break… sort of I had the best of intentions.

I just wanted to take a little break from partying. I do take breaks from time to time, you know. All it means is that if I go out, I won’t drink. Or if I stay at home, I’ll have a glass of wine.

And I watch a lot of videos. It’s what I like to call a liver breather.

It lasted for about a week. Then last Thursday I stopped by Milagro’s in Paia to have Dave’s tasty Buttery Nipple and say hi to Kirsten before going up to see the indie band Puritan at Casanova in Makawao. The bartender at Casanova, Jason, made a Chip Shot for me to perk up from the long drive. Then I met up with new pals Platelunch, Demune, Terms None, Body Holliday and this cool hairstylist chick. I had a shot of chilled Tuaca before we all went to the Cafeteria, watched the Dave Chapelle show and laughed our asses off at his “I’m Rick James, bitch!” sketch.

A day later I was at Charley’s in Paia to cheer on birthday girl Arica, who never showed up. I then went to the SandBar to see punk band Left 4 Dead. The place was packed and everyone—especially tattoo Nancy—was elated to have a punk show in Paia. The ass-kicking metal boys of Entity opened and of course, Khrinj’s Hans, John and Ian were there. Finally, Arica and Kirsten showed. Then I left prematurely but in the name of duty to return to Casanova to check out Seattle jazz trio Living Daylights. A friend and I picked up on an interesting vibe in the club, apparently brought on by the presence of all the elitist hippies from the Bay Area.

Elitist hippies?

That weekend, BJ and I cruised over to Hecocks in Lahaina for Mind Erasers. Then we wobbled our bikes down the street, stopping once to discreetly guzzle the can of Coors Light under my poncho. We arrived at Breakwater for Gomega Fest in a flurry. We said hi to everyone, watched a few live acts but flitted about the club, giddy with alcohol and anticipation to see Zero Tolerance. We were so eager and excited to see them, we stupidly left after their second song. We then kidnapped Platelunch, and with BJ on the back pegs of her bike, cruised back down to Hecocks for last call.

Jen was bartending. Sonja, Kevin and our “don’t-put-me-in-your-column” neighbor were there, as well as Maceo, whom I kept thinking was giving me a hard time but probably wasn’t. BJ, Platelunch and I all did a shot together and left. “See you all at my house later!” I said to everyone at the bar.

A few days later, BJ and I decided to experience some culture. We went to see the musical Into the Woods at the Iao Theater. It was great, but we couldn’t get the damn songs out of our heads. The next day we stopped by to say hi to photographer/bartender Sean at the Ale House in Kahului, downing a quick Lemon Drop and some stupid beer that replaced my Anchor Steam before we went to see Dawn of the Dead.

Then Saturday I went to Borders in Kahului to get jiggy with visiting Celtic band, Molly’s Revenge. Afterwards, I went back to Kirsten’s house to get ready with Arica and drink Watermelon Vodka Gatorades.

We went down to Paia to The Artery gallery exhibit of artists Ray Masters and Jerry Morgan. We drank red wine and hobnobbed with artsy charmers Piero Resta and Jay April, “I’m-19forever!” Paia Youth Center Director Blaze and many others. Mike was bartending, Matt played flamenco and the pupu spread was impressive.

Then I dropped Arica off at her house to get Courtney and I went to Casanova for the last night of this year’s Gomega Fest. Quite obviously ditching my liver breathing philosophies, I immediately agreed to a Jäger shot with John, then a tequila shot and beer with another lovely friend. Unfortunately for that cute DJ boy I flirted with last week, I caught up with him somewhere in the midst of my turning into Scary Tequila Monster Girl.

I demanded to meet his mother. I honestly don’t know why. Poor thing. I used to be so cool. MTW

30

APRIL 1, 2004

CLASSIFIED

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

APRIL 1, 2004

31

HIGH VISIBILITY! LOW COSTS! BACK SIDE CLASSIFIEDS WORK!

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244-6778

2099 Wells St., Wailuku

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TIDES AND TIMES

Maui Music has a great selection of used CD’s! Kihei Commercial Center, 300 Okukai Rd #C110 • 891-8090

Every week in Maui Time look for Paia Fish Market inside the issue.

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