Dear Sober Coach

MEET SOBER COACH SARAH.

Sarah has spent the last 12 years coaching and mentoring people who've struggled with their addictions and mental health, she knows that choosing to change your relationship with alcohol before you hit rock bottom is a powerful and positive choice to make

Sarah is passionate about spreading the message that our lives can be joyful and fun on the other side of our drinking careers and there's no need to feel lonely, stressed or bored on this journey.

Dear Coach Sarah

I thought that my sobriety was going to bring me 'zen like' levels of peace and calm but that hasn't happened-I'm often more stressed than I was before I stopped drinking

Can you offer me some reassurance please?

Thank you

Dearest JW

Thank you for your email

Here are a few thoughts a large part of my identity when I was drinking was busy-busybusy and also being anxious about being busy. I wanted to find contentment but it actually took me quite a long time to change gears to a more peaceful way of living.

I am afraid we cannot stress, strive, work hard, study deeply or walk over hot coals to get to peace I identified someone ahead of me on the journey towards less overwhelm and followed closely behind them I recommend you look for a bit of inspiration online or in real life, find someone being/modelling ‘who you want to be’ and ask them how they do what they do or how they got to where they are

Also ask yourself some good questions I was curious about what was making me feel less than fabulous and some of the answers were feeling tired, feeling like I didn't exercise or eat well enough, not having a passion to pursue and not learning new skills. There was too much of the color grey, watching or listening to the news, doom scrolling social media, oh, and the alcohol as well to name just a few

If there is a list of less than fabulous pointers, there must surely be an opposite Yes, things that bring me contentment and satisfaction and those are silence and stillness in my day, reading a fiction book, a bunch of cheery daffodils, a blanket with a hot water bottle in winter and a cool breeze on a warm day. A lovely scented candle, at least eight hours of sleep, a long, long walk, preferably around 20 kilometres with a lovely tea and cake shop about 15 kilometres in. Writing in my notebook, making a rough plan for the day, coming to a place of acceptance that things don't always feel comfortable. There's illness, there's surgery, there's relationships ending, and some things are deeply and horribly uncomfortable but I found a level of peace in knowing what I can control or influence and what I can't

Finding peace-It's crept up on me gently. I used to chase it hard and be left feeling a bit hollow by the experience but letting go and doing less has really helped me find my version of zen.

I hope that helps Love Sarah

Dear Sarah

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