Melbourne Observer. February 17, 2016

Melbourne

Observer

$2

95

ISSN 1447 4611

NEW WBIZ ★ LIFES TYLE ★ TR AVEL ★ FEA TURES ★ BARGAINS ★ SPORT NEWSS ★ SHO SHOWBIZ LIFESTYLE TRA FEATURES

Melbourne

Observer

Ph 1800 231 311 Fx 1800 231 312

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 2016

47TH YEAR OF PUBLICATION

GIANT 92-PAGE ISSUE $2.95

S TATE EDITION Vol 48 No 1627 SERVING VICTORIA SINCE 1969

including GST

MISS UNIVERSE’S PICASSO LINK

See Observer Trader

Mattresses Galore

Cnr High St & Tooronga Rd, Malvern Phone: (03) 9822 9057.

Fax: (03) 9822 9821 www.mattressesgalore.com.au info@mattressesgalore.com.au 10% EXTRA DISCOUNT FOR MENTIONING MELB. OBSERVER Details: see ‘Observer Trader’

THE GREA T GREAT MUSIC OF THE O ‘60s ‘30s T TO Streaming through the Web PHONE: 9572 146 6 1466

goldenda ysr adio goldenday sradio adio..com

● Miss Universe Australia Monika Radulovic with her fiancé Alesandro Ljubicic at a compelling photo exhibition that provides an intimate look at the world’s greatest modern artists at work opened this week at Sofitel Melbourne on Collins. Sofitel Revealed is curated by Olivier Widmaier Picasso, grandson of Pablo Picasso, and features 30 images selected from the archives of Paris Match, the famous French weekly magazine. The exhibition was commissioned by Sofitel Luxury Hotels and has been shown in Sofitel hotels in six cities in North America, five in Europe, as well as China, Thailand and New Zealand. This free exhibition will be on show in Sofi’s Lounge and in the Atrium Gallery On 35 at Sofitel Melbourne On Collins until March 29.

More photos on Page 4.

Photo: Cameron L’Estrange

Page 2 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Travel Planner

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 3

Page 4 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Melbourne People

● Lady Primrose Potter

● Michael Baldwin and Eleanor Milne

● Hannah McDonald, Angela Menz and Amanda Macor.

● Jo Constable and Rosanna Faraci

● Kevin Kelley, Lisa Alexander and Philip Rhode

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Sofitel Revealed Photographic Exhibition Sofitel Melbourne on Collins Photos: Cameron L’Estrange

● Richard Nylon and Anna Mott

● Fiona Byrne, Jim Lee, Heidi Victoria and David Mann

● Louise and Brett McLeod.

● Harry T with Brynne Edelsten

● Jane Scott with Isobel Crombie

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au Melbourne

Observer

Showbiz News

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 5

It’s All About You!

Melbourne

They will Observer rock you In This 92-Page Edition

● We Will Rock You will be staged at Melbourne’s Regent Theatre from August 30. Performance Times: Tues 7pm, Wed–Sat 8pm, Sat matinee 2pm, Sunday 1pm and 6pm. Price: From $69.90. Bookings: ticketmaster.com.au or phone 1300 111 011.

Saturday Night Fever

■ Producers of the new Australian production of the worldwide smash hit musical We Will Rock You have announced their cast.

Gareth Keegan (Jersey Boys, MTC’s Next to Normal, Hugh Jackman – Broadway to Oz concerts) will play the central role of Galileo, a Bohemian dreamer who hears strange song lyrics in his head and is ultimately the reincarnation of Freddie Mercury.

Erin Clare (Heathers, The Phantom of the Opera) will be Scaramouche, a sarcastic, cynical Bohemian misfit with sharp wit who wins Galileo’s heart and is the reincarnation of Brian May, only this time “he’s a babe”.

Brian Mannix, formerly the lead singer of 1980s band Uncanny X-Men, will return to the musical stage as Buddy, an old hippy librarian/philosopher and an expert on the lost sacred musical texts.

Killer Queen, a ruthless and power-crazy businesswoman who rules the world through Globalsoft, the worldwide corporation responsible for the suppression of all live music and all original thought, will be played by the extraordinary Casey Donovan (The Sapphires, Rent).

Thern Reynolds (Rock of Ages, South Pacific) and Jaz Flowers (Hairspray, Hot Shoe Shuffle, Fame) will portray Brit and Oz, a pair of Bohemian lovers who strive to rediscover the lost music and rebel against Killer Queen and Globalsoft.

And Simon Russell (ABC TV’s Jack Irish, Neighbours) will be Khashoggi, Killer Queen’s second-in-command, the sinister and cruel chief of Globalsoft police in charge of capturing the Bohemians and getting rid of any original or creative musical thoughts.

Also in the cast are Justin Anderson, Sheridan Anderson, Erinn Arnel, Michelle Barr, Hugh Barrington, Kyla Bartholomeusz, Sarah Clarke, Keane Fletcher, Scott McConnell, Suzie Melloy, Ruvarashe Ngwenya, Morgan Palmer, Joshua Russell, Ryan Sheppard, Leigh Sleightholme, Ashlee Smith, Thalia Smith, Mike Snell, Kate Thomas and Karla Tonkich.

Radio from Bruce’s house ■ Melbourne radio station 3AW has installed a small studio at the Eaglemont home of Nightline co-host Bruce Mansfield so that he can join the Monday-Thursday broadcasts of the show, 10pm-midnight.

Co-host Philip Brady and producer Simon Owens remain in the 3AW studios at Docklands.

Bruce Mansfield is undergoing ongoing treatment for prostate cancer. ● Full story, Page 28

In The Picture: Big night at Sofitel ............. Page 4 Long Shots: The Editor’s column ................ Page 6 440,000 at St Kilda Festival ....................... Page 7 Life and Style: Yvonne Lawrence ................ Page 8 Melbourne Confidential: Priceless goss .... Page 9 Photo: Whittlesea Country Music Fest .... Page 10 West Hollywood: Gavin Wood reports ........ Page 13 Mal Walden profile by Kevin Trask ............ Page 14 Victoria Pictorial: Nostalgia photos .......... Page 17 Travel and Wine: special report ................. Page 24 Ted Ryan’s Racing Report ......................... Page 36 Local Theatre Top 10 Lists Radio Confidential Country Music

Observer Showbiz Showbiz

Latest News Flashes Around Victoria

Murder alleged

■ Dylan Barker, 22, of Lovely Banks, has been remanded in custody over an alleged drive-by shooting murder, reports the Geelong Advertiser.

Bail granted

■ The alleged Wangaratta president of the Tramps Outlaw Motorcycle Gang has been granted bail, after more than a month in custody on drug and firearm charges. Ronald ‘Ronnie’Harding, 50, of South Wangaratta, was initially refused bail and remanded in custody on January 8, reports The Chronicle.

In Court today

■ Former Colac businessman Jordan Dittloff is due to appear on 50 theft charges in the County Court at Geelong today (Wed.).

Homes: longer wait

■ The Council to Homeless Persons has noted that people waiting for public housing in east Gippsland has increased by at least 17 people or households over the past quarter, reports the Gippsland Times.

Won’t seek top job

■ Interim City of Ballarat chief executive Frank Dixon will not be applying for the fulltime role, reports the Ballarat Courier.

Weather Forecast ■ ■ ■ ■ ■

Today (Wed.). Cloudy. 16°-21° Thurs. Scattered showers. 16°-25° Fri. Partly cloudy. 15°-26° Sat. Partly cloudy. 14°-27° Sun. Mostly sunny. 18°-31°

Mike McColl Jones ● Sheridan Anderson and Mike Snell in Saturday Night Fever.

Photo: Belinda Strodder ■ It was 1977 when Saturday Night Fever It was however the dancing and the disco (the movie) was released. It sent John that stole the show - authentic and energetic Travolta on a trajectory of fame (then there (in a very small space).

Saturday Night Fever was an extraordiwas Grease), and the Bee Gees into chart-topnary ensemble piece with amazing and someping orbit. It was a phenomenon.

StageArt’s Saturday Night Feverat Chapel times surprising emotional spirit.

Director Robbie Carmellotti has created off Chapel salutes with respect and craft the genius that is Saturday Night Fever. In my artful and memorable theatre. Music Director Tony Toppi, lighting designer Jason view – it is also a phenomenon! and choreographer Luke Alleva have From the get-go there was energy. This is Bovaird each played a significant part in creating a a show full of life, conviction, passion, and playground that brings to life the phenomenon talent. that is Saturday Night Fever.

Mike Snell is Tony - amazing vocally, as Performance Season: Until February 28 well as physically agile – he was the real deal.

Venue: Chapel Off Chapel, 12 Little Chapel Stephanie (Sheridan Anderson) and St, Prahran Annette (Elise Brennan) breathed life and Tickets: $65 - $55 soul into their characters with voices that could Bookings: www.chapeloffchapel.com.au not be faulted.

- Review by Beth Klein

Top 5

THE TOP 5 COMMENTS HEARD FROM THE SET OF I'M A CELEBRITY GET ME OUT OF HERE .

5. "For the last time Fev, ther is no TAB here.”

4. "Molly! What are you doing here?"

3. "Where did they get the studio audience - Ben Elton's show?"

2. "Val Lehman reckons the bugs and spiders taste better than the food at Wentworth."

1. "Come on Warnie - hands off.”

Page 6 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Melbourne

Observer

Melbourne

Observer

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Ash On Wednesday

Ash

Nothing new about Skyrail

inc orpor ating the Melbourne A d vvertiser ertiser incorpor orpora Ad ertiser,, ict orian Rur al Ne ws and Trr ader ader,, V Vict ictorian Rural New Melbourne T Melbourne Seniors News News..

Melbourne People

Guy Sigley, one of ★ the sons of TV’s Ernie and Glenys Sigley,

Victoria’s Independent Newspaper First Published September 14, 1969 Every W ednesda y Wednesda ednesday

Contact Us

has published a new book. The novel, Barney, aboutwhich Guy’s website says: “Meet Barney. He’s an average guy in his mid-thirties with questionable social skills and progressive germophobia. He likes routine. He likes to keep ● Guy Sigley his head down. Life’s pretty safe …until he’s spectacularly fired from a ten-year public service career.

Office: 30 Glen Gully Rd, Eltham, Vic 3095 Postal: PO Box 1278, Research, Vic 3095 Phone: +61 3 9439 9927 Fax: +61 3 9431 6247 Web: ww w.MelbourneObserv e rr..com.au .MelbourneObserve or@MelbourneObserv e rr..c om.au E-Mail: Edit ditor@MelbourneObserv or@MelbourneObserve

Our Team Director: Fleur Long Production Editor: Ash Long Features Editor: Peter Mac Associate Editor: Lisa Hodgson Columnists: Len Baker (harness racing), Matt Bissett-Johnson (cartoonist), David Ellis (wine and travel), Rob Foenander (country music), tina La Cr os K yle G alle y ((g g rre e yhounds ), Chris yhounds), Christina Cros osss Galle alley (as t rrology), ology), Y vonne La w rrenc enc e (lif e and sstyle tyle Yv (life tyle)) , Nick Le Souef (outback Australia), Mike McColl Jones (lif e ), Gr eg Ne wman (r adio ), T erry (life Greg Newman (radio adio), Terry Radford (Court roundsman), Aaron Rourke (mo vies ), T ed Ry an (r acing), Jim Sherlock (movies vies), Ted Ryan (racing), (movies, DVDs), Cheryl Threadgold (local thea e), K e vin T sho wbiz), V eritas, G a vin theatt rre Ke Trr ask ((sho showbiz), Veritas, Ga W ood (Holly w ood).

(Hollyw Honorary Reviewers: Rita Crispin, Martin Curtis, Barbar a Hughes, K a thryn K eeble yn Barbara Ka Keeble eeble,, Beth Klein, L Ly Lais eeden, Debor ah Marinar o, Laistte rr,, S Sttephen L Leeden, Deborah Marinaro Gr aeme McC oubrie therine McGr egor vid McCoubrie oubrie,, Ca Catherine McGregor egor,, Da David McLean, Maggie Morrison, Jill Page and Elizabeth Semmel.

Distribution: Sam Fiorini, phone 9482 1145

Distribution S ta dition: A vailable w eekly a o x. 400 tatt e E Edition: weekly att appr appro newsagents across the Melbourne metropolitan area, Mornington Peninsula, Geelong, Bellarine Peninsula, Surf coast, and Victorian regional centres.

Recommended retail price: $2.95.

If your local newsagent does not currently stock the Melbourne Observ e rr,, wh y not plac ea Observe why place weekly order with them, by using their ‘putaway’ service. Newsagents should contact All Day Distribution Pty Ltd, 169 Burwood Road, Hawthorn, Vic 3122. Phone: (03) 9482 1145.

Mail Subscriptions You can ha ve y our o wn c op y of the Melbourne hav your own cop Observer delivered to your letterbox by A u sstt rralia alia P os t. W e dispa opies of the Pos ost.

We dispattch c copies Melbourne Observer to mail subscribers every week.

Subscription prices are: 15 issues, $99; 30 erseas rra a te s is sues, $198; 45 is sues, #29 7. Ov issues, #297 Overseas available on application. Pay by Credit Card: Visa, Mastercard, American Express, without surcharge.

Organise your mail subscription:

By Phone: 1800 231 311

By Fax: 1800 231 312 E-Mail: edit or@MelbourneObserv e rr..com.au editor@MelbourneObserv or@MelbourneObserve

By Post: PO Boc 1278, Research, Vic 3095. Pay by cheque, Money Order or Credit Card.

Available Across The World Melbourne Observer Online 2.

2.11 million hits annually annually.. w w w.MelbourneObserv e rr..c om.au .MelbourneObserve You can rread ead our paper fr ee on the int ernet. internet.

Contact details for our advertisers are also available at our website.

Back Copies Back Copies - Archives w ww .MelbourneObserv e rr..com.au .MelbourneObserve Back copies for 1969-89, 2002-15 may be inspected by appointment at the State Library of Victoria. 328 Swanston St, Melbourne.

Independently Owned and Operated The Melbourne Observer is printed under contract by Streamline PressPty Ltd, 155 Johns ton S t, Fitzr o y, ffor or the publisher St, Fitzro publisher,, Local Media Pty Ltd. ABN 67 096 680 063, of the registered office, 30 Glen Gully Rd, Eltham, Vic 3095. Distributed by All Day Distribution.

Responsibilityfor election and referendum comment is accepted by Ash Long.

Copyright © 2015, Local Media Pty Ltd. ACN 096 680 063.

■ Residents of the southeastern suburbs of Melbourne are upset about the news that the State Government will elevate rail lines in order to eliminate dangerous level crossings.

There is nothing so new about the ‘Skyrail’ concept.

We discovered this illustration of the Flinders St Viaduct in an 1889 issue of the Illustrated Australian News.

David Campbell and Ricki Lee, singing favourite Disney hits from Frozen, The Lion King, Beauty & the Beast, The Little Mermaid and Mary Poppins.

Chong Lim and his orchestra will play.

Night Melbourne takes place on Satur ★White day (Feb. 20) from 7pm until 7am. whitenightmelbourne.com.au Melbourne publicist Kerry O’Brien says the ★ first UK staging of Strictly Ballroom The Musical is to premiere at West Yorkshire Playhouse, Leeds on November 30.

Entertainer Wilbur Wilde is to be ambassador ★ for a cruise featuring Chubby Checker who will headline a Rock The Boat 6 salute which also

‘Abba’ at Crown

■ Gold: The Ultimate ABBA Show will present their 40th Anniversary Tour show Dancing Queen at The Palms at Crown on Saturday April 2.

Disney Under the Stars will be staged at the ★ Sidney Myer Music Bowl on Saturday, March 5. Artists include Harrison Craig, Lucy Durack,

Long Shots

editor@MelbourneObserver.com.au

with Ash Long, Editor “For the cause that lacks assistance, ‘Gainst the wrongs that need resistance For the future in the distance, And the good that we can do”

Observer Treasury Thoughts For The Week

■ “Art attracts us only by what it reveals of our most secret self.

- Jean-Luc Godard

Observer Curmudgeon

■ “Deeds are fruits; words are leaves.”

- Old English saying

Text For The Week

■ “Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity.

- Joel 2:13 Contents of Court Lists are intended for information purposes only. The lists are extracted from Court Lists, as supplied to the public, by the Magistrates’ Court of Victoria, often one week prior to publication date; for current Court lists, please contact the Court. Further details of cases are available at www.magistratescourt.vic.gov.au The Melbourne Observer shall in no event accept any liability for loss or damage suffered by any person or body due to information provided. The information is provided on the basis that persons accessing it undertake responsibility for assessing the relevance and accuracy of its content.

No inference of a party’s guilt or innocence should be made by publication of their name as a defendant. Court schedules may be changed at any time for any reason, including withdrawal of the action by the Plaintiff/Applicant. E&OE.

includes Gary Puckett and The Union Gap (USA), The Searchers (UK), The Fortunes (UK), Brian Poole & Chip Hawkes (UK), The Troggs (UK), P.J. Proby (USA), The Pacemakers (UK),and Badfinger featuring Joey Molland (UK).

Chaplam is stepping down as Austra★Chris lian Communications Media Authority chief.

Picnic meeting on Feb. 28 ■ The St Pats Race Club YeaAnnual Cup meeting will be held on Sunday, February 28.

As well as providing good racing with bookies and TA B available, the race meeting also provides a day of family entertainment.

Gaye Gauci Marchant, winner of the Victorian Wakefield Club Lady in Racing award, will be a guest of St Pats this year.

People wishing to dine with Gaye at the St Pats races and hear her remarkable story can bid for the privilege at the auction on Facebook.

Visit www.facebook. com/yeaststpatsrace club The six-race program has the cup, sponsored the Neil Beer Seymour, as the main race.

Bookies and the TAB provide the opportunity for betting on local, country and interstate races.

A large video screen shows all local and interstate races.

● All eyes were on the horses as they enter the straight at Yea St Pats Races last year.

A feature of the St There is a coffee there are many free Pats Races is the vari- vendor; alcoholic and activities to entertain ety of catering options soft drinks are avail- and interest the chilavailable. able from the bar; a dren including pony There is fine dining home-made ice in the air-conditioned cream and lemonade rides, animal farm and club rooms where lo- stall; as well as a plant, Kelly Sports.

There are three cal chef, Naomi home made cakes and bands in attendance.

Harry, provides a gour- produce stall.

Tables situated unmet meal using much St Pats will once of locally grown pro- again conduct a fam- der the shady trees duce in the menu. ily friendly race meet- and marquees of variAlso available is a ing with entertainment ous sizes are availthree-course cold buf- for the whole family. able for hire fet or a picnic hamper There are the popuFor more informadelivered to your table lar ‘fashions on the tion and bookings visi or marque. field’ and ‘best hat’ There is an eco- competitions with www.racingvictoria. nomical fresh take- cash prizes to be won. com.au/yeastraces or away food stall. PaThe vintage cars phone Marilyn, 5797 trons may bring their and hot rodders attract 3233 own picnic. much interest while - Leonard Sheahan

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 7

Jude Perl’s new album

440,000 crowd

● A crowd of more than 440,000 people was reported at the 36th annual St Kilda Festival this year. This year highlights have included a live wedding on the main stage to celebrate Valentine's Day, a high heel race, Cupid's Undie Run, m ore than 80 local Australian bands, KidZone with family-friendly events and activations including Spongebob Square Pants Bikini Bottom Beach Party, Dazzling Dan The Magic Man, and stilt walkers.

Photo: Nathan Doran

Briefs Age test

■ A teenage migrant accused of sexually assaulting eight women on Queensland’s busiest beach will undergo medical tests to determine whether he should be tried as an adult. The Afghanistan-born defendant, who holds a permanent Australian residency visa, was arrested last month, accused of 13 sexual offences against eight women swimming between the flags at the famous Surfers Paradise beach.

Charged ■ Nicholas Archer, 27, CFA volunteer, appeared at Melbourne Magistrates’ Court on Monday, to face more than 25 arson and sabotage charges, including the allegation that he lit a bushfire at Mount Disappointment, near Flowerdale. He is also charged with sabotaging a train at Hurstbridge, with $3 million damages caused.

Melbourne

Observer

Showbiz News

Spotlight on celebrities ■ The spotlight will be on Australian celebrities in a new musical talk-variety show titled Follow Spot, being presented at Chapel Off Chapel, February 26 -28.

Hosted by Chelsea Plumley, the show will focus the Follow Spot on guest artists who have contributed to the Australian cultural landscape.

Through in-depth interviews, fun games and candid musical performances led by Chelsea on piano and accompanied by her house band, audiences will see celebrity guests drop their guard and join in the fun.

At each show, audiences will get a rare glimpse into the creative craft and life of three well-known artists, and be treated to unique, unplugged musical performances.

Guests appearing in the series include Rhonda Burchmore, Debra Byrne, Judi Connelli, Martin Croft, John Diedrich, John O’May, Queenie van de Zandt, Anne Wood and Julia Zemiro.

As Follow Spot’s host, Chelsea is a multi-tal-

Melbourne Observations

with Matt Bissett-Johnson

■ Singer/songwriter/comedian Jude Perl’s has launched her debut album Modern Times, presented by SugarHope Records and produced

by Grammy Award winning engineer Brian Paturalski in Los Angeles.

Following a sell-out season of her debut comedy show at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival in ● Jude Perl 2015, Jude will also be performing her new show, Part Of This Complete Breakfast at this year’s Melbourne International Comedy Festival.

The show details her exciting journey from a humble jingle writer to a wannabe pop singer.

Jude says her inspirational story “just goes to show that anything is possible if you work hard, believe in yourself and have photographic evidence of a company representative paying off a safety inspector at one of their Guatemalan factories.

“Dreams really can come true!”

Dates: March 23, 27. 30,April 3, 6, 10, 13. 17.

Time: 10pm. Cost: $32 full, $28 concession Venue: The Butterfly Club, 5 Carson Place, Melbourne. Tickets: thebutterflyclub.com - Cheryl Threadgold

At Helen’s Hill Winery

● Laura Burzacott and Nate Gilkes in The Major Bruce Sessions.

ented award-winning stage, cabaret and television actor.

Chelsea also musically directed The Boy From Oz for the Victorian College of the Arts and four productions of Thomas the Tank Engine and the Hidden Treasure (Singapore, Hong Kong, Dubai, Melbourne).

● Chelsea Plumley She regularly coaches music theatre professionals and lectures at VCA. Chelsea says she is thrilled to take her audience on a musical adventure to “honour the creative contribution of leading Australian performers.”

Performance season: February 26 – 27 at 9pm;

February 28 at 7pm Venue: The Loft, Chapel Off Chapel, 12 Little Chapel St, Prahran Tickets: $25-$30, discount packages if booking all three shows Bookings: 8290 7000 www.chapeloffchapel. com.au - Report by Cheryl Threadgold

Licence cancelled

■ The Australian Securities and and Investments Commission has banned Mr Angie Skouras for four years from engaging in any credit activities and cancelled the Australian credit licence of Global Edge Finance Group Pty Ltd following an investigation and subsequent administrative hearing.

As the sole director, responsible manager and key person on the licence of Global Edge, Mr Skouras failed to ensure that Global Edge complied with its obligations under the credit legislation, ASIC alleges. respectively.

ASIC found that Mr Skouras was not a fit and proper person to engage in credit activities.

■ Helen’s Hill Estate and Present Tense present The Major Bruce Sessions on March 5 at Helen’s Hill Estate in Coldstream.

Boutique winery Helen’s Hill Estate is renowned for thinking ‘outside the box,’ and that innovative thinking has led to a new collaboration with an unlikely partner - theatre ensemble Present Tense.

Helen’s Hill owner Allan Nalder says, “People have asked us to stage something on our beautiful lawn for as long as I can remember.

“But we think differently. Grape grazing is a thing of the past and the mass-produced winery type events would never fit our company culture.

“Instead, we yearned for a bespoke event, handmade with love, reflecting what we do with our wine.”.

Enter Present Tense Artistic Directors Nathan Gilkes and Bryce Ives, with their great vocal arrangements, eclectic mixture of rock with opera and their energetic and passionate live performances.

Alan had now found the perfect artistic collaborators for his unique vision.

Helen's Hill Estate, located 45 minutes from Melbourne at the start of the Yarra Valley, will provide a backdrop for the evening performance.

Audience members can purchase a picnic hamper while sampling award-winning wines of Helen’s Hill Wines and Ingram Estate from the cellar door.

Music featured from Present Tense artists includes: the internationally acclaimed singer, songwriter and performer Mikelangelo; star of the musical Once, Jane Patterson; a favourite of the Melbourne theatre and cabaret scene Laura Burzacott; music legend Rosie Westbrookon double bass; and a swinging rock band led by Nathan Gilkes.

Venue: Helen's Hill Estate. 16 Ingram Rd, Coldstream.

Date: Saturday, March 5.

Tickets: Various from $30 Adult / $25 Concession / $15 Kids/ $110 Family Pass Times: Gates open at 5pm for a 6.30pm show Bookings: www.helenshill.com.au/shop - Cheryl Threadgold

Page 8 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

How I won Dr Gavin’s gold star award

Yvonne’s Column

■ It’s been the most stressful week. I can’t believe it’s over.

You would never guess in a million years what caused my stress, and the loss of hours in the day to pursue my normal daily activities.

Mind you, during my overworked week, various call centres offering tiles for my roof, new light globes, and various other things were continually interrupting me. I’m usually polite with these callers, but I was so busy and these calls really ruined the flow of the day.

They got short shrift I can tell you.

Precaution ■ Anyhow, back to the activity that took up my entire week.

I was taking my other half’s blood pressure and pulse every two hours at the request of his doctor.

And I had to repeat the procedure for seven days.

Doctor Gavin instructed the results were to be recorded every two hours, and the tests were to be made whilst my husband was sitting up and then taken while he was lying down.

I thought that Peter had, like Alice, gone through the looking glass when he came home and told me.

We didn’t know why the doctor had made this request, but I rationalised that if it had been serious he would have told Peter. It was then only a precaution.

Looking up the Internet and trying to sort it out was no help to me at all.

Competent ■ Before I could start I had to buy a blood pressure machine because I couldn’t find the one that used to be with the first aid box. That took up a couple of frustrating hours looking in drawers and boxes.

It was a bit like starting a new diet because I decreed that I would start the procedure on Monday. That’s the day when anything new is started in our house.

It took a couple of tests before I felt competent to record the readings and make a start for real.

with Yvonne Lawrence

yvonne.lawrence@bigpond.com Peter was a good patient but I was hoping that I wasn’t going to record any alarming results.

I didn’t, so it was all plain sailing.

Smirking Bill ■ It’s amazing how quickly a two-hour period can seem like two minutes, especially when one has other chores.

Answering those incessant calls from salespeople with broken English, reading from their pitch cards is just what you don’t need at such a time.

By the end of the week the phone was put on answering mode, and we listened to music.

Fortunately Parliament came on the ABC just after one of his tests, so we could relax and hear what was happening in the state of the Nation.

It was a particularly rowdy session, and we wondered how the Speaker kept his cool.

It was an interesting observation that the leader of the opposition Bill Shorten turns his back to the Government benches when a ques tion is being answered, and he smirks and laughs with those on his front bench.

Trumped ■ Seems most folk have a favourite story about Donald Trump. Our fave is how DT sent a very nasty, threatening letter to a supplier, letter was perfectly typed on expensive gold embossed stationery.

Supplier simply replied: “Donald, I thought you should know that some lunatic has stolen your stationery.”

Needless to say, future business was terminated and supplier was thrilled.

DJ madness ■ Radio DJs get up to the craziest of stunts . An Austrian DJ took the chocolates in the lead up to last Christmas.

Joe Kohlhoper of Antennae Carinthia locked himself in the studio and played Last Christmas by Wham no less than 24 times on repeat.

Management not impressed and made Joe work Christmas Eve and New Years Day. Only reason Joe stoppedv playing Last Christmas was when his four year old daughter phoned in and pleaded with him to STOP. Most likely a pre-planned stunt that got worldwide coverage but had loyal listeners dial twisting in a panic.

Not a good look ■ Kevin Rudd used to write incessantly. He never looked up and appeared never to listen. I often wondered what on earth he had to write about that couldn’t wait for one hour during question time.

I won’t even mention the two women on the Opposition side who cross their not very attractive long legs, and sit with their skirts hiked up as far as possible. It’s not a good look ladies.

We were discussing this lack of manners and we came to the conclusion that there is no respect from either side. In fact we went so far as to decide that the whole world has lost respect for everyone and everything.

We often laugh about the rules made by our parents and thinking that if they came back to earth today they would be horrified at the lack of manners.

I hate being a passenger in the car because I see so many near misses and actual bingles, totally caused by one of the drivers showing disrespect for the other.

Phone manners ■ Phoning a business through the week I was

Gold star

■ Whilst I’ve been channeling Nurse Ratched, the “big nurse” from One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest, and taking a break between procedures, we have been watching some wonderful vintage films on television.

It was great to watch Spencer Tracy and Sydney Poitier in the 1961 award winning film Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner. How could I leave out Katharine Hepburn?

Tracy makes a wonderful speech at the end of the film, and it really could be used today to make people realise how destructive a racist attitude can be.

Last night we watched the 1938 film The Citadel from the novel by A.J.Cronin.

A black and white film starring Robert Donat and Rosalind Russell.

The results of the tests came back today, and Dr. Gavin awarded me a gold star, so all my efforts were not wasted.

I’m putting my feet up this week.

Good karma.

Women’s footy tales

O’K

■ In 1959 amateur side University Blues played a small part in advancing the then fledgling Women's Football League .

The Law facilty decided to challenge Commerce students.

Brothers galore ■ Move over Daddo brothers, there's a new team in town - the Hemsworth boys. Actor, hunk and all round good bloke Chris has two brothers who are also actors . All three have done their hard yards in learning the ropes in Aussie soapies - The Saddle Club, Neighbours, Home and Away. Chris recently signed on as global ambassador to appear in tv spots for Australian Tourism - and , yes, he'll appear shirtless.

Mr Doo-Wop ■ Hi there, Guys and Gals. This is a plug for one of the funkiest shows on Melbourne radio -The Malt Shop Hop, heard Wednesdays on PBS 106.7 FM , 11 am-1pm. Presented by the coolest cat in creation Mr Doo -Wop aka Peter Merrrett - spins in R & B platters dating back to the '40s - Jump, Jubilee, Jive and Rock plus interesting bios about the artists and their their recording labels. The how has a dedicated audience both locally and around the globe via PBS website. For the platters that matter, tune your dial to Mr Doo - Wop on PBS. ■ Multi -talented Simon Owens celebrates his 20th year in radio at 3AW. Simon has occupied many seats at AW including production and more recently on- air with Bruce and Phil, and co-presenter of Australia Overnight. Sure beats working in a Bank . Apart from all the hats Simon has to wear he also carries the title of Archivist at Radio 3AW.

greeted by “Yair” when they answered. I gave my name and before I could tell this female on the other end the reason for my call she said “yes Yvonne what’s your problem”.

I did tell her that if we ever meet socially I would decide whether I would give her permission to use my Christian name, and reiterated my Surname. All I heard was a snort and dial tone. She hung up. She showed me a total lack of respect.

I won’t even talk about mobile phones and the total lack of respect by users. I don’t want to hear their conversation when I’m in a queue, sitting on a train or worse, in a restaurant.

I’ve seen women chatting on their mobile phone when they are dining with a male friend or worse their husband. The poor bloke is sitting at the table twiddling his thumbs whilst his dining companion is chatting away, ignoring him, while her meal which is sitting in front of her gets cold.

It amazes me that a couple can go out to a restaurant for a meal and not utter one word to one another, Peter and I have loads to talk about, even it is only to talk about fellow diners.

● Commercial Cuties

● Mayhem at the footy Uni Blues supplied the guernseys - even though they were linimen scented and very whiffy .

After training in absolute secrecy the grudge match was played at the Uni Oval .

Despite the girls best efforts the talent was around the boundary.

Essendon icon John Coleman was coach of Commercial Cuties and Lou Richards fired up the Legal Lovelies Controlling the willing players were Essendon VFL champion players John Birt and Ken Fraser.

No sooner had the final bell rung when all hell broke out with players, officials and spectators engaged in a full-on blue around the ground.

Commercial Cuties were declared winners by three points and reports indicate players soon forgot their differences over a pint, or six at the West Brunswick Hotel operated by John Coleman.

Next season the Victorian Amateur Football Association will launch a all women's competition.

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Obser ver - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 9

Melbourne

Confidential Talk is cheap, gossip is priceless

Point 8 Six

● Tim Wotherspoon in Point 8 Six. ■ The great thing about theatre is variety. Not everyone will enjoy everything about every show but usually there is something to keep most of the audience entertained or engaged.

Point 8 Six has a lot going for it, yet it is a difficult piece to comprehend. I appreciate the talent of the six performers, their energy on stage and obvious rapport with one another.

They played their roles with conviction and kept me intrigued, guessing who and what they were portraying, however this guessing went on too long and whilst I think I understood the show in part, it was not enough to raise my voice in praise.

Writer and director Tim Wotherspoon stated in the program that this piece was an ’absurdist philosophical comedy, sort of’.

I get the ‘sort of’ part. I admired his acting performance however his writing is too obscure for a general audience.

I did however laugh at individual lines and enjoyed the rivalry and banter between characters.

This show had some lovely theatrical techniques.

The use of space in the small La Mama venue was creative, using both in and out doors to create a larger playing area and open the imagination to a world outside the four walls.

The ‘stage ‘ itself was put to optimum use, walls included. The opening particularly captured my imagination giving me a sense of excitement as to what was to come.

The lighting design incorporated interesting effects to denote changes in time and place.

If you are a fan of David Bowie, the colour orange and don’t need to understand what is going on you might love this show, if you are really smart you may even understand it and enjoy another unique night at the theatre.

Performance Season: Until February 21 Venue: La Mama Theatre, 205 Faraday St., Carlton Bookings and further details: www.lamama. \com.au - Review by Elizabeth Semmel

Review: Fly Guardian

■ Translated from the Polish by Kristof Kaczmarek and Steve Gome, Fly Guardian could almost be said to embody the spirit of an Eastern Europe struggling for purpose and meaning in a Communist dystopia.

The Old Man (Kristof Kaczmarek) inhabits a derelict dwelling observing flies. He could well be insane. Indeed, if one is to believe the story he tells during the play, two of his daughters have him committed after the loss of his wife and a favourite third daughter.

The Old Man’s Lear-like madness is compounded by the arrival of Abel (Luke Lennox), a prodigal with a criminal record, who is being pursued by Cain (Dawid Kaczmarek).

The Old Man’s protection of Abel is both punitive and beneficent and as arbitrary as his treatment of the flies he nurtures. Thus, this sometime ridiculous, sometime comic but invariably dark depiction of life takes on biblical proportions and challenges the audience to contemplate questions of choice, sacrifice, purpose and identity. The benign presence of a guardian angel (Suhasini Seelin) throughout the play takes on an added poignancy in the dramatic climax.

Turn To Page 37

Two and Two Together

● Georgina (Leann Cairnduff), Rachel ( Eleni Miller), Henry (Laurie Jezard) in Two and Two Together.

Photo: Karim Ghantous ■ Derek Benfield’s comedy Two and Two Together can be enjoyed in Mount Waverley until February 20 at the Unicorn Theatre, Mt Waverley Secondary College.

Presented by Peridot Theatre under the direction of Cheryl Richards, audiences are kept entertained by farcical goings on in two different neighbouring homes in a UK city.

In a light-hearted whirl of deceit and saucy double entendres, Rachel secretly meets young Frank at friend Georgina’s house at number 35.

Meanwhile, Rachel’s unsuspecting hubby Victor gets cosy with Georgina at number 10.

But Georgina’s actor husband Henry arrives home unexpectedly early, causing madcap confusion and lies.

Adding to the fun mix are colourful characters Neighbourhood Watch volunteer Procter, and cleaning lady Mrs Capstick.

The experienced, competent cast includes Eleni Miller (Rachel), Nathan Reynolds (Victor), Leeann Cairnduff (Georgina), Laurie Jezard (Henry), Cate Dowling Trask (Mrs Capstick), David Dodd (Procter) and Sam Fyfield (Frank).

As usual, Cate Dowling Trask commands the stage with her presence. Loved the smiley-face vacuum-cleaner. ● Turn To Page 37

Rumour Mill

How Molly got to be Molly

Hear It Here First

Spy on Local Paper ■ Sunday Age ‘Spy’ coumnisty Lawrence Moneym brought back while Mark Hawthorne is on leave, mentioned the Melbourne Observer and its editor at the weekend:

● Clipping from The Sunday Age

Radio case in Court ■ Southern Cross Austereo Pty Ltd, operators of Fox and MMM, have requested a Melbourne Magistrates’ Court telephone pre-hearing conference today (Wed.) when it is due to allege a civil claim against Cameron Scott, alleging breach of contract (non-payment)

Scarlett Belle’s Scarlet Letters

■ Scarlett Belle is looking glamorous wearing Carnivale-style cape and flamboyant mask.

She greets the audience at the door of The Butterfly Club with a mask and suggests we wear them during the show. The intrigue begins.

The power of suggestion ‘forces’ everyone to keep these masks on for the entire show, even though Scarlett removes her own mask during her introduction.

Perhaps it is this power that makes all of us conform. During Scarlett’s renditions of her self-confessed promiscuous life, she adopts this same force to try to conform to her own expectations.

Scarlett’s letters are written to herself and take the audience on an intimate journey of her life.

She matter-of-factly tells us all the sordid details relating to her letters.

When she adds songs to the narrative, her music theatre background comes to the fore. She comes alive with song and brings her audience along with her.

She bravely discusses all and every intimate subject including mistaking sex for love, masturbation, awkward first dates, losing one’s virginity, Internet porn and chat rooms, three-somes and other complicated relationships, swinging par-

Whispers

● Scarlett Belle. Photo: 3FatesMedia ties and orgies, Virtual sex Vs. Real & Hyde’sBring On The Men’ is an sex, being single (and living with a absolute highlight.

Followed closely by her tender cat), needing and wanting to be soulful performance of Happy Days touched with real love.

Scarlett makes good use of the Are Here Again as the finale.

This is a show for those who ensimple set and props. The show has joy cabaret with strong themes of a good pace and is never predictsex and love, with honest and open able.

She relates well to her audience, performance.

Scarlett will be travelling to the has an amiable lilting voice for story- Adelaide Fringe Festival and pertelling and strong vocals suiting her forming from February 19 to 27 at chosen songs.

La Boheme.

Her powerful rendition of Jekyll - Review by Lyn Laister

E-Mail: Confidential@MelbourneObserver.com.au

● Ian ‘Molly’ Meldrum ■ Melbourne showbiz identity Frank Howson has revealed how he gave the nickname to music man Ian ‘Molly’ Meldrum: “I was the office boy at 3UZ in 1968 and one of my duties was to deliver the mail to everyone in each department,” Frank told the Observer.

“One morning I walked into Stan Rofe's office to pass on his fan mail and he was dictating his weekly Go Set column to Ian Buckland who was sitting at the typewriter..

“As I enetered Stan looked at me and said, "Hey Frankie, Ian Meldrum has been very bitchiy to me in his column so I want to get back at him by calling him a girl's name.

“We've been trying to come up with something. You're good with words.

What's a good name for him?"

“I thought for a moment and muttered. .."Meldrum ...

Melldrum ..."

“Sounding the his surname so I could come up with a first name that would go well with it..

“Ian Buckland then said "What about MIldred? ...

And I said What about Molly?"

“And the rest, as they say, is history.

“Not that many years ago I was at Molly’s house filining his cameo in my movie Remembering Nigel “ Turn To Page 37

Page 10 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Melbourne People

● Andrew Embling od Alexandra and Cr Rex Griffin

● Sarah Catania of Greensborough

● Torri Parke sang at the Country Music Festical stage in Walnut St

● Lee Kenworthy and John Berry of Whittlesea CFA

Whittlesea Country Music Festival Photos: Ash Long

● Amanda Congdon and Jess Beard-Burgoyne of St John Ambulance Diamond Valley

● Matt Hopkins of Hurstbridge with Festival winner Nick Spriggs of Eden Park

● Loretta Backs of Whittlesea

● Phil Berchdolt of Yan Yean, Des Deacon of South Morang, and Saad Saad of Pascoe Vale, of the Whittlesea Men’s Shed which meets at the S’grounds

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

● Daniel Bird and Shelley Owen of Whittlesea CFA

● Whittlesea and Plenty Valley Tourism Association Junior Vice-President Bryan Matthews, secretary Barry Hill, and president Charles Castle

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 11

Showbiz People

● 3UZ presenters. 1960s.

● John Stuart. 3DB.

Melbourne radio personalities Nostalgia Collection

● Margo Harry and Don Kinsey. 3DB.

● Helen Jackson, 3AW

● Terry Lane, ABC.

● 3KZ announcer presenting an AMCAL chemist commercial. Circa 1940.

● Janie Forbes and Gerald Lyons. 3DB.

● Douglas Aiton. 3AW. 1981.

● Victorian Banjo Club. On 3KZ. Early 1950s.

Page 12 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

PROMOTIONAL FEATURE

Shedding some light on the CFA Key objectives for next Grand Master

■ Don Reynolds will be installed as Grand Master of Freemasons Victoria on Friday, April 1.

He will become the 45th Grand Master of this outstanding organisation, and joins an elite group of men elected by their peers to lead the fraternity.

With more than 25 years of executive, strategic and financial management experience across a number of industries, Don is well placed to assist the organisation to achieve its vision and strategic goals.

Specifically, he has worked as a financial consultant, administration manager and chief executive officer, managing multi-million dollar portfolios in the fields of manufacturing, pharmaceuticals, finance and information technology.

As well as his sound business acumen, Don brings outstanding leadership skills to Freemasons Victoria.

Having been responsible for large teams of personnel within successful businesses, Don understands what it takes to grow a positive, team-orientated culture.

With membership growth, engagement and retention as key objectives for the fraternity, Don's ability to lead Freemasons Victoria successfully through a period of modernisation will be crucial to the organisation's future.

As a member of the Freemasons Foundation Victoria, Don is also vitally engaged in many community projects the Foundation supports from both a financial and logistical perspective.

● Don Reynolds and Mya G. Grayly The Grand Installation, celebrated along with a series of events to mark the occasion, will commence at 7:30pm at the Melbourne Convention and Exhibition Centre.

Other events will include a Ladies Breakfast to be held at the Rendezvous Hotel on Friday April 1, a Grand Banquet at MCEC on Saturday April 2 and a Family Day at the Royal Freemasons Homes, 45 Moubray St, Melbourne on Sunday April 3.

Local, interstate and overseas guests will witness this milestone in Victoria's masonic history.

The Grand Installation will be live streamed to the internet from 7:25pm AEST and can be accessed by registering on the Freemasons Victoria website: www.freemasonsvic.net.au/ Video/live-streaming-and-webcasts/ If you have any queries about the Installation and associated events, please contact Julia Edwards at installation@freemasonsvic.net.au

■ Mornington Lodge, in conjunction with the support of the Freemasons Foundation, has just provided a $5000 cheque to the Mount Martha CFA for the purchase of portable battery powered lighting equipment.

This lighting is not only required for fire-fighting at night but will be vitally important in assisting search and rescue activities with the SES. Prior the cheque presentation, Mount Martha CFA staff were kind enough to give Lodge representative David Tuckwell a tour of the facility.

The cheque was presented to the CFA at their general meeting which ● CFA's Lieutenant Michael Dillon, Captain Bruce Conboy, Secrewas attended by 41 CFA members. tary Mount Martha CFA and David Tuckwell of Mornington Lodge.

Andrew Love Cancer Centre receives blood storage refrigerator

■ Bob Pullin of Rosebank Lodge donated $9735 to the Andrew Love Cancer Centre at Geelong Hospital on Thursday February 4, on behalf of the Freemasons Foundation.

The funds will be used to purchase a new blood storage refrigerator.

Prior to this, blood was stored either in another part of the hospital or across the road at its Pathology supplier's building which made accessing blood for cancer patients a cumbersome exercise.

Now staff at the Centre will have direct access to blood for transfusions readily available.

● From left: Andrew Love Cancer Centre Transfusion Nurse, Annissa Yttrup, Bob Pullin of Rosebank Lodge and Director of Haematology Dr Phillip Campbell.

Freemasons change their working tools

● Nick Pethica of Mt Franklin St George, BlazeAid Leader Graeme McFetters, Ron Fleming of Sturt Buninyong Lodge and Neville Telfer of St Johns Lodge, with another roll of damaged fencing.

■ Central Highlands Task Force members donned leather gloves, goggles, high viz vests and took up wire cutters to assist BlazeAid in fence removal as part of the Scotsburn fire recovery program.

Some 10members contributed 21 days with a further day arranged to join the working party.

On December 19, the Scotsburn fire affected 42 properties, razed 4200ha of bush and farmland, destroyed 12 houses along with hundreds of kilometres of fencing, killing around 2,500 head of sheep and other livestock.

Four Freemasons have property in and around the area with two being marginally impacted by the fire.

However, new life is emerging with a tinge of green across some areas and discovery of two blackwood seedlings in the fork of a very black tree.

BlazeAid started in 2009 after the Black Saturday bushfires in Victoria.

Since then volunteers have helped more than 3163 disaster affected property owners from 46 base camps across all states of Australia.

BlazeAid's main focus is to assist property owners rebuild their fences that have been damaged or destroyed by natural disasters.

To find out more about Freemasonry, how to become a member, or attend upcoming public events, please visit www.freemasonsvic.net.au Or ‘like’ our FaceBook page www.facebook.com/freemasonsvic for the most up to date information.

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au Melbourne

Observer

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 13

West Hollywood

Hollywood comes to Melbourne ■ Hi everyone, from my suite at the Ramada Plaza Hotel and Suites comes this week's news.

City of West Hollywood

Americans are coming ■ West Hollywood's movers and shakers are arriving in Melbourne to sell the glamour and glitz on offer at LA's many tourist attractions.

The sales mission is headed by Melbourne's Alan Johnson who is based in LA as the CEO of the Ramada Plaza West Hollywood and Hoteliers International Corporation.

West Hollywood City Manager Paul Arevalo, the president of the West Hollywood Marketing and Visitors Bureau, together with a bevy of sales and marketing staff will be there to meet with travel agencies, media and tourist authorities.

West Hollywood is a favourite destination for Aussie travellers.

"Santa Monica Boulevard and the Sunset Strip with its restaurants, clubs and bars are the number one attractions for Australians," said Johnson.

"And we are finding many younger travellers taking up the air fares now on offer from QANTAS and Virgin. In the past month the Ramada Plaza has taken more than 500 bookings, mainly from the under 30 age group."

■ Pictured at the launch is Alan Johnson with event hostess Kerri Anne Kennerley.

Big bucks: $199 million ■ The chief executive of Google Inc has been given an astounding $199 million in shares, setting him on a path to be the highest-paid CEO of a publicly traded company in the US. Sundar Pichai was made chief executive after Alphabet, the search engine's parent company, was created.

The 43-year-old executive was given 273,328 Class C Alphabet shares this month, which will become available to him in quarterly increments through 2019 if he stays at his job.

That amount is the largest ever given to a Google executive whose equity grants have to be reported, according to Bloomberg Business.

Pichai led or oversaw product management of householdname projects like Google Chrome, Google Drive, Gmail, and Google Maps.

Last week, Alphabet reportedly surpassed Apple as the world's most valuable firm.

● Alan Johnson with Kerri Anne Kennerley.

Licences galore ■ Some 605,000 undocumented immigrants who live in California were granted driver's licences in 2015, the first year they have been able to enjoy that benefit.

The law known as AB60 took effect on January 2 last year.

The California Department of Motor Vehicles expects a total of about 1.4 million people will get their licence under the law by late 2017.

Governor Jerry Brown, a Democrat, signed the law in October 2013 to give a legal document to the 2.5 million undocumented immigrants in California alone - most from Latin America and particularly neighboring Mexico.

Biggest box office ■ China recorded its biggest ever day of theatrical takings on Monday last week, the first day of the Chinese New Year.

Gross takings amounted to RMB660 million ($100.5 million) according to the State Administration of Press, Publication, Radio, Film and Television. The previous highest day was July 18, 2015 according to the bureau, when takings hit RMB425 million.

Topping the chart was Stephen Chow's The Mermaid, which earned $40.5 million (RMB270 million) according to the SAPPRFT. Local box office tracker Ent Group showed that The Mermaid enjoyed 73,400 screenings at the nation's theaters.

In second place was The Man From Macau 3 (aka From Vegas to Macau 3 ) directed by Wong Jing and starring Chow Yun-fat. It achieved $25.9 million from 57,500 screenings.

Third was Soi Pou-cheang's The Monkey King 2 with $24.6 million from 55,800 screenings.

Chinese New Year (aka Lunar New Year and Spring Festival in different parts of Asia) has in the last couple of decades become a peak cinema going time for Chinese. This year the first day of the holidays began on Monday, which mean that many people had travelled earlier last week or over the weekend to be with their families. That allowed Monday to be a big day for the cinema and three major films - all China-Hong Kong co-productions - were released simultaneously.

Star Wars was released on Jan. 9 and finished on $125.5 million. It dropped rapidly after a stellar $53 million opening weekend, but had little significant competition as the anticipated Chinese blockbusters all targeted the Chinese New Year crowds.

● West Hollywood ■ West Hollywood (aka "WeHo") is one of LA's top neighborhoods, from famed streets like Sunset and Robertson Boulevards to its vibrant gay community.

The Sunset Strip has it all, including entertainment venues like the House of Blues and the Comedy Store, the lively Saddle Ranch Chop House and fine dining at Herringbone.

Robertson Boulevard is famous for its high-end fashion boutiques.

The Schindler House is located on Kings Road and considered to be the first house built in the modern style.

WeHo is home to Southern California's largest LGBT community, and is the site of the annual Gay Pride parade in June, and the Halloween Costume Carnaval, which attracts hundreds of thousands of partiers.

The Abbey is the most famous of WeHo's numerous bars and clubs, mainly located on Santa Monica Boulevard. Browse the top West Hollywood hotels and experience this endlessly entertaining region.

MOCA Pacific Design Center Occupying more than 3000 square-feet of exhibition space, MOCA Pacific Design Center continues to feature new work by emerging and established artists in architecture, design, photography and contemporary art.

GavinWood

From my Suite at the Ramada Plaza Complex on Santa Monica Blvd

Johnny Depp stars

Pacific Design Plaza This two-acre outdoor area features lush garden landscaping, fountains, and the stunning Blue and Green Buildings as a backdrop.

Daytime festivals and parties, as well as evening dinners, dances and concerts, are perfectly suited to this elegant location.

Elaborate staging; lighting and sound are easily accommodated. The plaza accommodates up to 2500 guests for parties and receptions and up to 1500 guests for sit-down events.

Fast and furious ● Johnny Depp ■ Get ready for Johnny Depp to disappear into his next role.

The Black Mass and Pirates of the Caribbean actor is set to star in Universal Pictures' The Invisible Man. The latest adaptation of H.G. Wells' 1897 sci-fi novella about a gifted scientist who becomes unhinged after turning himself invisible will be produced by Alex Kurtzman and Chris Morgan, who are building out a shared movie universe based on Universal's classic monsters.

Depp's role in Invisible Man thus puts him in the same cinematic realm as Tom Cruise's (non-title) character in the upcoming reboot of The Mummy.

The new Invisible Man does not yet have a writer, director, or timetable for production, while The Mummy is due in theaters June 9, 2017.

Wells' book has been directly adapted on film and TV several times, including Universal's 1933 version starring Claude Rains, and it has inspired countless other screen stories, such as Paul Verhoeven's 2000 film Hollow Man.

www.gavinwood.us

■ Fast 8 director F. Gary Gray and screenwriter Chris Morgan are gunning for a female villain in the next Fast and Furious movie, and are particularly interested in Theron after her turn in Mad Max: Fury Road.

No offer has been made to Theron, and as it's not finished, the actress hasn't seen a script yet.

Fast 8 will land in theaters April 14, 2017, marking the first part of a new three-film storyline.

Considering a move?

■ If you are considering a move to Los Angeles or just coming over for a holiday to see the sights then I have got a special dea for you.

We would love to see you at the Ramada Plaza Hotel and Suites, 8585 Santa Monica Boulevard, West Hollywood.

I have secured a terrific holiday deal for readers of the Melbourne Observer.

Please mention 'Melbourne Observer' when you book and you will receive the 'Special Rate of the Day'.

Please contact: Joanna at info@ramadaweho.com Happy Holidays, Gavin Wood.

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Page 14 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

■ Mal Walden had a wonderful career in radio and television over a period of about 50 years.

Mal was always very popular. These days it is nice to see him attend The Survivors meetings to catch up with his old friends.

I think Mal has a great sense of humour. I remember watching him stumble on the pronunciation of a word on Eyewitness News on Channel 10 and few hours later as I passed by him at the opening night of a show I whispered the word in his ear and he burst into laughter.

Mal was born in the UK in 1945 and came to Australia with his family in the 1950s.

After attending Mentone Grammar School, Mal became a cadet journalist in radio and worked at 3YB, 7EX and 3DB. In 1970 he moved to Channel 7 as the host of the quiz program Jeopardy and then as a television reporter.

In 1979 Mal Walden took over from Brian Naylor as chief newsreader on Channel 7 when Brian moved to Channel 9.

In 1987 Mal was told, minutes before going on camera to read the news, that he had been sacked.

With tears in his eyes Mal bid a farewell to his viewers and there was a public outcry from his fans.

I was watching that night and it was a very emotional moment - Mal was like a part of the family in our lounge rooms.

The ratings for Seven News plummeted and

Whatever Happened To ...

Mal Walden

By Kevin Trask of 3AW and 96.5 Inner FM

Mal was hired by the ATV-10 to read the news with David Johnston and their ratings soared.

We were just pleased to have Mal back on air.

In 1997 Mal became chief newsreader when David Johnston decided to return to Channel 7.

During the 1990s the three top commercial television newsreaders in Melbourne were Brian Naylor at Nine, David Johnston at Seven, and Mal Walden at Ten. In February 2009 they had arranged to play golf together at Yan Yean but because the extreme heat they postponed their game.

Sadly Brian Naylor and his wife Moiree were victims of the bushfires at Kinglake on that day and Mal had to report the event during Ten's

● Mal Walden Eyewitness News report. Mal has had the difficult task of reporting on the passing of many of his friends and colleagues during his career.

Mal had a small voiceover role as an ABC journalist in the Australian film The Dish.

In 2004 he published a book which detailed the history of ATV- 10 over the first 40 years.

In later years his co- presenters included Jen-

nifer Hansen and Helen Kapalos.

On Wednesday, December 4, 2013, Mal presented his last Ten Eyewitness News Melbourne bulletin and retired at the age of 68. You can watch this final broadcast on YouTube.

Mal and his wife Pauline have two adult children, twins Sarah and James.

As we mark the 60 years of TV in Australia, television news has certainly changed over the years.

In the early days we saw black and white presentations using 16mm film inserts and local personalities such as Eric Pearce reading the news.

As the years went by we moved to colour and amazing instant reporting with satellite clips from around the world and ‘on the spot’ mobile phone images readily available to the newsroom.

‘The News’ is still one of the favourite program s on Australian television and we remember the contribution that Mal Walden made to the industry during his career.

Continue to enjoy your retirement Mal. Kevin Trask The Time Tunnel - with Bruce and Phil Sundays at 9.20pm on 3AW That's Entertainment - 96.5FM Sundays at 12Noon 96.5FM is streaming on the internet.

To listen, go to www.innerfm.org.au and follow the prompts.

Authorities muck up dinosaur find ■ Last week I noted that fossils had reared their heads, and again I've come across another fossil incident.

In 1969 a miner was mining in his claim at Bald Hill, a field just north of the Lightning Ridge township, when he broke through into what he thought was another miner's old claim.

He discovered he was mistaken the hole was actually a natural cav-

ern. The intriguing thing was that there was a 15-foot dinosaur skeleton lying on the floor of the cave. Much of its tail was missing but the rest was intact.

He was excited about this, so obviously decided to inform the relevant authorities about his find.

He had an American mate who was above to leave for home, so he

gave him the jawbone to take down to the Sydney Museum, which he did.

The bureaucrats replied to him: "Could you place about 80kg of bones into a box, take them to the nearest railhead, and send it off. We will reimburse you for the freight later."

Walgett was 100 miles round trip, so he decided that because of their seeming disinterest, he wasn't interested in pursuing the matter.

So probably Australia's primary fossil still either lies unclaimed in the clay, or squashed by bulldozers, thanks to bureaucratic bungling.

■ A 3-year-o, Justin Megan-Parker, was recently drowned in a Top End pool.

This is always a tragic situation, and generally can be avoided.

I recall when my daughter Atheka was about the same age, she was in a polystyrene boat - it had a hole in the middle where she was sitting, being supported by straps, and she paddled this about in the pool with her hands.

There were many adults just sitting beside the pool drinking and chatting.

Somehow she had turned turtle, and something made me glance over, and I saw her legs waving about in the air.

I dived straight in and rescued her, but it was a salutary lesson.

The NT Government is planning to tighten pool fence laws after this latest incident.

I have always had a fence around our pool, but it was a fence with a difference - an electric cattle fence.

After it was erected and completed, I invited the three of them over: "When I count to three, kids, I want you to grab this wire."

"One two three!"

Screams of pain, and I was "naughty daddy" for a while, but there was no damage to them.

They never went near the pool again without me.

■ I have noticed in various parts of Australia - just beside Bird Lake at Port Augusta, and another one on a lake at Forbes on the Newell Highway to name a couple - bird hides.

They're often used by wildlife photographers such as David Atten-borough and his ilk.

Bird Observers, or Twitchers as they're known, will sneak into the structures, viewing through gaps to check the habits and antics of the birds

The Outback Legend

with Nick Le Souef Lightning Ridge Opals 175 Flinders Lane, Melbourne Phone 9654 4444 www.opals.net.au in the lake nearby. Interestingly, even if the birds see them, they can't count, and think it's empty if just one person leaves.

And I even had a twitcher mate from a famous band called Motorhead.

Wurzel was an enthusiastic bird watcher who plied his hobby whenever he was on tour around the world.

I know that I have often waxed lyrical about our NT feathered friends, and now there's something more being done.

Because of this diversity many visitors come to the Centre for the wildlife, particularly the birds, so Standley Chasm is experiencing a $60,000 upgrade, including two hides. " Birdwatching is a huge business in the NT, particularly for English tourists, which is one of the reasons we invest in birdwatching conferences in London," noted Chief Minister Adam Giles.

■ I just received an invitation from a mate of mine for a farewell dinner at the famous Overlanders' Steakhouse in Alice Springs.

His name is Wayne Kraft, universally known as Krafty. He's a good bloke, and a good mate, and he is universally liked and respected throughout the Centre.

His restaurant is decorated with historic Territory memorabilia, including camel skins, and horse saddles in the rafters.

When I was first introduced to the Steakhouse, he had a nightly show for overseas visitors. This was a raucous Australian sing-along that had backpackers climbing into the rafters and into the saddles to sing along, and a red-hot branding iron to burn the Steakhouse logo onto their jeans.

A wild night was always had by all. People from all over the world were always bamboozled by this spectacle, which culminated in a "wocka board" rendition of Tie me Kangaroo Down Sport.

■ ‘Specialty de la Maison’ of the Steakhouse is always, in my opinion, the Camel Mignon.

It was Angie McGowan's favourite, but Keith couldn't come at it.

It's the best tasting fillet steak I've ever had.

Then there was the ‘Drovers' Blowout’, with a sample of each of the Territory's favourites - camel, buffalo, crocodile, kangaroo, and emu.

Overseas visitors thought of themselves as brave to attempt this dish and I always found most of them to be delicious. Croc not so wonderful, however.

It's a pity I reckon that our forefathers decided that cattle should be their staple meat fare when the others are just as tasty, and they would be much better for our environment to farm.

Certainly emus, roos and camels.

Kangaroo is almost universally available at most restaurants in Alice Springs and indeed, occasionally Australia wide.

There was once a restaurant in Alice Springs specialising in Aussie fare, and my mate Dave, who ran it, would often invite me and my staff down to try out the new dishes he was about to serve up from his menu.

One particular night it was a mystery roast, and he brought it to the table hidden with a silver cover.

And then, voila, the lid was removed - roast possum. This was legal brush-tail imported fromNew Zealand.

A pity we couldn't get that going in Melbourne - we'd all get a better night's sleep.

- Nick Le Souef

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 15

Observer Classic Books

‘The Uncommercial Traveller’ by Charles Dickens

Continued From Last Week The last small scraping of coals left was raked together in a corner of the floor. There were some rags in an open cupboard, also on the floor.

In a corner of the room was a crazy old French bed-stead, with a man lying on his back upon it in a ragged pilot jacket, and rough oil-skin fantail hat. The room was perfectly black. It was difficult to believe, at first, that it was not purposely coloured black, the walls were so begrimed.

The last small scraping of coals left was raked together in a corner of the floor. There were some rags in an open cupboard, also on the floor.

In a corner of the room was a crazy old French bed-stead, with a man lying on his back upon it in a ragged pilot jacket, and rough oil-skin fantail hat. The room was perfectly black. It was difficult to believe, at first, that it was not purposely coloured black, the walls were so begrimed.

As I stood opposite the woman boiling the children’s clothes, — she had not even a piece of soap to wash them with, — and apologising for her occupation, I could take in all these things without appearing to notice them, and could even correct my inventory. I had missed, at the first glance, some half a pound of bread in the otherwise empty safe, an old red ragged crinoline hanging on the handle of the door by which I had entered, and certain fragments of rusty iron scattered on the floor, which looked like broken tools and a piece of stove-pipe. A child stood looking on. On the box nearest to the fire sat two younger children; one a delicate and pretty little creature, whom the other sometimes kissed.

This woman, like the last, was wofully shabby, and was degenerating to the Bosjesman complexion. But her figure, and the ghost of a certain vivacity about her, and the spectre of a dimple in her cheek, carried my memory strangely back to the old days of the Adelphi Theatre, London, when Mrs. Fitzwilliam was the friend of Victorine.

‘May I ask you what your husband is?’

‘He’s a coal-porter, sir,’ — with a glance and a sigh towards the bed.

‘Is he out of work?’

‘Oh, yes, sir! and work’s at all times very, very scanty with him; and now he’s laid up.’

‘It’s my legs,’ said the man upon the bed. ‘I’ll unroll ’em.’ And immediately began.

‘Have you any older children?’

‘I have a daughter that does the needle-work, and I have a son that does what he can. She’s at her work now, and he’s trying for work.’

‘Do they live here?’

‘They sleep here. They can’t afford to pay more rent, and so they come here at night. The rent is very hard upon us. It’s rose upon us too, now, — sixpence a week, — on account of these new changes in the law, about the rates. We are a week behind; the landlord’s been shaking and rattling at that door frightfully; he says he’ll turn us out. I don’t know what’s to come of it.’

The man upon the bed ruefully interposed, ‘Here’s my legs. The skin’s broke, besides the swelling. I have had a many kicks, working, one way and another.’

He looked at his legs (which were much discoloured and misshapen) for a while, and then appearing to remember that they were not popular with his family, rolled them up again, as if they were something in the nature of maps or plans that were not wanted to be referred to, lay hopelessly down on his back once more with his fantail hat over his face, and stirred not.

‘Do your eldest son and daughter sleep in that cupboard?’

‘Yes,’ replied the woman.

‘With the children?’

‘Yes. We have to get together for warmth. We have little to cover us.’

‘Have you nothing by you to eat but the piece of bread I see there?’

‘Nothing. And we had the rest of the loaf for our breakfast, with water. I don’t know what’s to come of it.’

‘Have you no prospect of improvement?’

‘If my eldest son earns anything to-day, he’ll bring it home. Then we shall have something to eat to-night, and may be able to do something towards the rent. If not, I don’t know what’s to

Charles Dickens ‘This is a sad state of things.’

‘Yes, sir; it’s a hard, hard life. Take care of the stairs as you go, sir, — they’re broken, — and good day, sir!’

These people had a mortal dread of entering the workhouse, and received no out-of-door relief.

In another room, in still another tenement, I found a very decent woman with five children, — the last a baby, and she herself a patient of the parish doctor, — to whom, her husband being in the hospital, the Union allowed for the support of herself and family, four shillings a week and five loaves. I suppose when Thisman, M.P., and Thatman, M.P., and the Public-blessing Party, lay their heads together in course of time, and come to an equalization of rating, she may go down to the dance of death to the tune of sixpence more.

I could enter no other houses for that one while, for I could not bear the contemplation of the children. Such heart as I had summoned to sustain me against the miseries of the adults failed me when I looked at the children. I saw how young they were, how hungry, how serious and still. I thought of them, sick and dying in those lairs. I think of them dead without anguish; but to think of them so suffering and so dying quite unmanned me.

Down by the river’s bank in Ratcliff, I was turning upward by a side-street, therefore, to regain the railway, when my eyes rested on the inscription across the road, ‘East London Children’s Hospital.’ I could scarcely have seen an inscription better suited to my frame of mind; and I went across and went straight in.

I found the children’s hospital established in an old sail-loft or storehouse, of the roughest na-

ture, and on the simplest means. There were trap-doors in the floors, where goods had been hoisted up and down; heavy feet and heavy weights had started every knot in the well-trodden planking: inconvenient bulks and beams and awkward staircases perplexed my passage through the wards. But I found it airy, sweet, and clean. In its seven and thirty beds I saw but little beauty; for starvation in the second or third generation takes a pinched look: but I saw the sufferings both of infancy and childhood tenderly assuaged; I heard the little patients answering to pet playful names, the light touch of a delicate lady laid bare the wasted sticks of arms for me to pity; and the claw-like little hands, as she did so, twined themselves lovingly around her wedding-ring.

One baby mite there was as pretty as any of Raphael’s angels. The tiny head was bandaged for water on the brain; and it was suffering with acute bronchitis too, and made from time to time a plaintive, though not impatient or complaining, little sound. The smooth curve of the cheeks and of the chin was faultless in its condensation of infantine beauty, and the large bright eyes were most lovely. It happened as I stopped at the foot of the bed, that these eyes rested upon mine with that wistful expression of wondering thoughtfulness which we all know sometimes in very little children. They remained fixed on mine, and never turned from me while I stood there.

When the utterance of that plaintive sound shook the little form, the gaze still remained unchanged. I felt as though the child implored me to tell the story of the little hospital in which it was sheltered to any gentle heart I could address. Laying my world-worn hand upon the little unmarked clasped hand at the chin, I gave it a silent promise that I would do so.

r

e rv se US N Ob N IO BO CT SE

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

A gentleman and lady, a young husband and wife, have bought and fitted up this building for its present noble use, and have quietly settled themselves in it as its medical officers and directors. Both have had considerable practical experience of medicine and surgery; he as house-surgeon of a great London hospital; she as a very earnest student, tested by severe examination, and also as a nurse of the sick poor during the prevalence of cholera.

With every qualification to lure them away, with youth and accomplishments and tastes and habits that can have no response in any breast near them, close begirt by every repulsive circumstance inseparable from such a neighbourhood, there they dwell. They live in the hospital itself, and their rooms are on its first floor. Sitting at their dinner-table, they could hear the cry of one of the children in pain. The lady’s piano, drawing-materials, books, and other such evidences of refinement are as much a part of the rough place as the iron bedsteads of the little patients.

They are put to shifts for room, like passengers on board ship. The dispenser of medicines (attracted to them not by self-interest, but by their own magnetism and that of their cause) sleeps in a recess in the dining-room, and has his washing apparatus in the sideboard.

Their contented manner of making the best of the things around them, I found so pleasantly inseparable from their usefulness! Their pride in this partition that we put up ourselves, or in that partition that we took down, or in that other partition that we moved, or in the stove that was given us for the waiting-room, or in our nightly conversion of the little consulting-room into a smoking-room! Their admiration of the situation, if we could only get rid of its one objectionable incident, the coal-yard at the back! ‘Our hospital carriage, presented by a friend, and very useful.’ That was my presentation to a perambulator, for which a coach-house had been discovered in a corner down-stairs, just large enough to hold it. Coloured prints, in all stages of preparation for being added to those already decorating the wards, were plentiful; a charming wooden phenomenon of a bird, with an impossible top-knot, who ducked his head when you set a counter weight going, had been inaugurated as a public statue that very morning; and trotting about among the beds, on familiar terms with all the patients, was a comical mongrel dog, called Poodles. This comical dog (quite a tonic in himself) was found characteristically starving at the door of the institution, and was taken in and fed, and has lived here ever since.

An admirer of his mental endowments has presented him with a collar bearing the legend, ‘Judge not Poodles by external appearances.’

He was merrily wagging his tail on a boy’s pillow when he made this modest appeal to me.

When this hospital was first opened, in January of the present year, the people could not possibly conceive but that somebody paid for the services rendered there; and were disposed to claim them as a right, and to find fault if out of temper.

They soon came to understand the case better, and have much increased in gratitude. The mothers of the patients avail themselves very freely of the visiting rules; the fathers often on Sundays. There is an unreasonable (but still, I think, touching and intelligible) tendency in the parents to take a child away to its wretched home, if on the point of death. One boy who had been thus carried off on a rainy night, when in a violent state of inflammation, and who had been afterwards brought back, had been recovered with exceeding difficulty; but he was a jolly boy, with a specially strong interest in his dinner, when I saw him.

Insufficient food and unwholesome living are the main causes of disease among these small patients. So nourishment, cleanliness, and ventilation are the main remedies. Discharged patients are looked after, and invited to come and dine now and then; so are certain famishing creatures who were never patients. Both the lady and the gentleman are well acquainted, not only with the histories of the patients and their families, but with the characters and circumstances of great numbers of their neighbours — of these they keep a register. It is their common experi-

Continued on Page 16

Page 16 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Observer Classic Books From Page 15 ence, that people, sinking down by inches into deeper and deeper poverty, will conceal it, even from them, if possible, unto the very last extremity.

The nurses of this hospital are all young, — ranging, say, from nineteen to four and twenty. They have even within these narrow limits, what many well-endowed hospitals would not give them, a comfortable room of their own in which to take their meals. It is a beautiful truth, that interest in the children and sympathy with their sorrows bind these young women to their places far more strongly than any other consideration could. The best skilled of the nurses came originally from a kindred neighbourhood, almost as poor; and she knew how much the work was needed. She is a fair dressmaker. The hospital cannot pay her as many pounds in the year as there are months in it; and one day the lady regarded it as a duty to speak to her about her improving her prospects and following her trade. ‘No,’ she said: she could never be so useful or so happy elsewhere any more; she must stay among the children.

And she stays. One of the nurses, as I passed her, was washing a baby-boy. Liking her pleasant face, I stopped to speak to her charge, — a common, bullet-headed, frowning charge enough, laying hold of his own nose with a slippery grasp, and staring very solemnly out of a blanket. The melting of the pleasant face into delighted smiles, as this young gentleman gave an unexpected kick, and laughed at me, was almost worth my previous pain.

An affecting play was acted in Paris years ago, called ‘The Children’s Doctor.’As I parted from my children’s doctor, now in question, I saw in his easy black necktie, in his loose buttoned black frock-coat, in his pensive face, in the flow of his dark hair, in his eyelashes, in the very turn of his moustache, the exact realisation of the Paris artist’s ideal as it was presented on the stage. But no romancer that I know of has had the boldness to prefigure the life and home of this young husband and young wife in the Children’s Hospital in the east of London.

I came away from Ratcliff by the Stepney railway station to the terminus at Fenchurch Street.

Any one who will reverse that route may retrace my steps.

do you say to giving the house the best opportunities of serving it hot and quickly by dining in the coffee-room?’

What I had to say was, Certainly. Bullfinch (who is by nature of a hopeful constitution) then began to babble of green geese. But I checked him in that Falstaffian vein, urging considerations of time and cookery.

In due sequence of events we drove up to the Temeraire, and alighted. A youth in livery received us on the door-step. ‘Looks well,’ said Bullfinch confidentially. And then aloud, ‘Coffee-room!’

The youth in livery (now perceived to be mouldy) conducted us to the desired haven, and was enjoined by Bullfinch to send the waiter at once, as we wished to order a little dinner in an hour.

Then Bullfinch and I waited for the waiter, until, the waiter continuing to wait in some unknown and invisible sphere of action, we rang for the waiter; which ring produced the waiter, who announced himself as not the waiter who ought to wait upon us, and who didn’t wait a moment longer.

So Bullfinch approached the coffee-room door, and melodiously pitching his voice into a bar where two young ladies were keeping the books of the Temeraire, apologetically explained that we wished to order a little dinner in an hour, and that we were debarred from the execution of our inoffensive purpose by consignment to solitude.

Hereupon one of the young ladies ran a bell, which reproduced — at the bar this time — the waiter who was not the waiter who ought to wait upon us; that extraordinary man, whose life seemed consumed in waiting upon people to say that he wouldn’t wait upon them, repeated his former protest with great indignation, and retired.

Bullfinch, with a fallen countenance, was about to say to me, ‘This won’t do,’ when the waiter who ought to wait upon us left off keeping us waiting at last. ‘Waiter,’ said Bullfinch piteously, ‘we have been a long time waiting.’ The waiter who ought to wait upon us laid the blame upon the waiter who ought not to wait upon us, and said it was all that waiter’s fault.

‘We wish,’ said Bullfinch, much depressed, ‘to order a little dinner in an hour. What can we have?’

Chapter XXXIII— ‘What would you like to have, gentlemen?’

ALITTLE DINNER INAN HOUR Bullfinch, with extreme mournfulness of speech It fell out on a day in this last autumn, that I had and action, and with a forlorn old fly-blown bill to go down from London to a place of seaside of fare in his hand which the waiter had given resort, on an hour’s business, accompanied by him, and which was a sort of general manumy esteemed friend Bullfinch. Let the place of script index to any cookery-book you please, seaside resort be, for the nonce, called moved the previous question.

Namelesston.

We could have mock-turtle soup, a sole, curry, I had been loitering about Paris in very hot and roast duck. Agreed.At this table by this winweather, pleasantly breakfasting in the open air dow. Punctually in an hour. in the garden of the Palais Royal or the Tuileries, I had been feigning to look out of this window; pleasantly dining in the open air in the Elysian but I had been taking note of the crumbs on all Fields, pleasantly taking my cigar and lemon- the tables, the dirty table-cloths, the stuffy, soupy, ade in the open air on the Italian Boulevard to- airless atmosphere, the stale leavings everywards the small hours after midnight. Bullfinch where about, the deep gloom of the waiter who — an excellent man of business — has sum- ought to wait upon us, and the stomach-ache moned me back across the Channel, to transact with which a lonely traveller at a distant table in this said hour’s business at Namelesston; and a corner was too evidently afflicted. I now thus it fell out that Bullfinch and I were in a pointed out to Bullfinch the alarming circumrailway carriage together on our way to stance that this traveller had DINED. We hurNamelesston, each with his return-ticket in his riedly debated whether, without infringement of waistcoat-pocket. good breeding, we could ask him to disclose if Says Bullfinch, ‘I have a proposal to make. Let he had partaken of mock-turtle, sole, curry, or us dine at the Temeraire.’ roast duck? We decided that the thing could not I asked Bullfinch, did he recommend the be politely done, and we had set our own stomTemeraire? inasmuch as I had not been rated achs on a cast, and they must stand the hazard on the books of the Temeraire for many years. of the die.

Bullfinch declined to accept the responsibility I hold phrenology, within certain limits, to be of recommending the Temeraire, but on the true; I am much of the same mind as to the whole was rather sanguine about it. He ‘seemed subtler expressions of the hand; I hold physiogto remember,’ Bullfinch said, that he had dined nomy to be infallible; though all these sciences well there. A plain dinner, but good. Certainly demand rare qualities in the student. But I also not like a Parisian dinner (here Bullfinch obvi- hold that there is no more certain index to perously became the prey of want of confidence), sonal character than the condition of a set of but of its kind very fair. casters is to the character of any hotel. KnowI appeal to Bullfinch’s intimate knowledge of ing, and having often tested this theory of mine, my wants and ways to decide whether I was Bullfinch resigned himself to the worst, when, usually ready to be pleased with any dinner, or laying aside any remaining veil of disguise, I — for the matter of that — with anything that held up before him in succession the cloudy oil was fair of its kind and really what it claimed to and furry vinegar, the clogged cayenne, the dirty be. Bullfinch doing me the honour to respond in salt, the obscene dregs of soy, and the anchovy the affirmative, I agreed to ship myself as an sauce in a flannel waistcoat of decomposition. able trencherman on board the Temeraire.

We went out to transact our business. So ‘Now, our plan shall be this,’ says Bullfinch, with inspiriting was the relief of passing into the clean his forefinger at his nose. ‘As soon as we get to and windy streets of Namelesston from the Namelesston, we’ll drive straight to the heavy and vapid closeness of the coffee-room Temeraire, and order a little dinner in an hour. of the Temeraire, that hope began to revive And as we shall not have more than enough within us. We began to consider that perhaps time in which to dispose of it comfortably, what the lonely traveller had taken physic, or done

something injudicious to bring his complaint on.

Bullfinch remarked that he thought the waiter who ought to wait upon us had brightened a little when suggesting curry; and although I knew him to have been at that moment the express image of despair, I allowed myself to become elevated in spirits. As we walked by the softly-lapping sea, all the notabilities of Namelesston, who are for ever going up and down with the changelessness of the tides, passed to and fro in procession. Pretty girls on horseback, and with detested riding-masters; pretty girls on foot; mature ladies in hats, — spectacled, strong-minded, and glaring at the opposite or weaker sex. The Stock Exchange was strongly represented, Jerusalem was strongly represented, the bores of the prosier London clubs were strongly represented. Fortune-hunters of all denominations were there, from hirsute insolvency, in a curricle, to closely-buttoned swindlery in doubtful boots, on the sharp look-out for any likely young gentleman disposed to play a game at billiards round the corner. Masters of languages, their lessons finished for the day, were going to their homes out of sight of the sea; mistresses of accomplishments, carrying small portfolios, likewise tripped homeward; pairs of scholastic pupils, two and two, went languidly along the beach, surveying the face of the waters as if waiting for some Ark to come and take them off. Spectres of the George the Fourth days flitted unsteadily among the crowd, bearing the outward semblance of ancient dandies, of every one of whom it might be said, not that he had one leg in the grave, or both legs, but that he was steeped in grave to the summit of his high shirt-collar, and had nothing real about him but his bones. Alone stationary in the midst of all the movements, the Namelesston boatmen leaned against the railings and yawned, and looked out to sea, or looked at the moored fishing-boats and at nothing. Such is the unchanging manner of life with this nursery of our hardy seamen; and very dry nurses they are, and always wanting something to drink.

The only two nautical personages detached from the railing were the two fortunate possessors of the celebrated monstrous unknown barking-fish, just caught (frequently just caught off Namelesston), who carried him about in a hamper, and pressed the scientific to look in at the lid.

The sands of the hour had all run out when we got back to the Temeraire. Says Bullfinch, then, to the youth in livery, with boldness, ‘Lavatory!’

When we arrived at the family vault with a skylight, which the youth in livery presented as the institution sought, we had already whisked off our cravats and coats; but finding ourselves in the presence of an evil smell, and no linen but two crumpled towels newly damp from the countenances of two somebody elses, we put on our cravats and coats again, and fled unwashed to the coffee-room.

There the waiter who ought to wait upon us had set forth our knives and forks and glasses, on the cloth whose dirty acquaintance we had already had the pleasure of making, and which we were pleased to recognise by the familiar expression of its stains. And now there occurred the truly surprising phenomenon, that the waiter who ought not to wait upon us swooped down upon us, clutched our loaf of bread, and vanished with the same.

Bullfinch, with distracted eyes, was following this unaccountable figure ‘out at the portal,’ like the ghost in Hamlet, when the waiter who ought to wait upon us jostled against it, carrying a tureen.

‘Waiter!’ said a severe diner, lately finished, perusing his bill fiercely through his eye-glass.

The waiter put down our tureen on a remote side-table, and went to see what was amiss in this new direction.

‘This is not right, you know, waiter. Look here! here’s yesterday’s sherry, one and eightpence, and here we are again, two shillings. And what does sixpence mean?’

So far from knowing what sixpence meant, the waiter protested that he didn’t know what anything meant. He wiped the perspiration from his clammy brow, and said it was impossible to do it, — not particularising what, — and the kitchen was so far off.

‘Take the bill to the bar, and get it altered,’ said Mr. Indignation Cocker, so to call him.

The waiter took it, looked intensely at it, didn’t seem to like the idea of taking it to the bar, and submitted, as a new light upon the case, that perhaps sixpence meant sixpence.

‘I tell you again,’ said Mr. Indignation Cocker,

‘here’s yesterday’s sherry — can’t you see it?

— one and eightpence, and here we are again, two shillings. What do you make of one and eightpence and two shillings?’

Totally unable to make anything of one and eightpence and two shillings, the waiter went out to try if anybody else could; merely casting a helpless backward glance at Bullfinch, in acknowledgement of his pathetic entreaties for our soup-tureen. After a pause, during which Mr. Indignation Cocker read a newspaper and coughed defiant coughs, Bullfinch arose to get the tureen, when the waiter reappeared and brought it, — dropping Mr. Indignation Cocker’s altered bill on Mr. Indignation Cocker’s table as he came along.

‘It’s quite impossible to do it, gentlemen,’ murmured the waiter; ‘and the kitchen is so far off.’

‘Well, you don’t keep the house; it’s not your fault, we suppose. Bring some sherry.’

‘Waiter!’ from Mr. Indignation Cocker, with a new and burning sense of injury upon him.

The waiter, arrested on his way to our sherry, stopped short, and came back to see what was wrong now.

‘Will you look here? This is worse than before.

DO you understand? Here’s yesterday’s sherry, one and eightpence, and here we are again two shillings. And what the devil does ninepence mean?’

This new portent utterly confounded the waiter.

He wrung his napkin, and mutely appealed to the ceiling.

‘Waiter, fetch that sherry,’ says Bullfinch, in open wrath and revolt.

‘I want to know,’ persisted Mr. Indignation Cocker, ‘the meaning of ninepence. I want to know the meaning of sherry one and eightpence yesterday, and of here we are again two shillings. Send somebody.’

The distracted waiter got out of the room on pretext of sending somebody, and by that means got our wine. But the instant he appeared with our decanter, Mr. Indignation Cocker descended on him again.

‘Waiter!’

‘You will now have the goodness to attend to our dinner, waiter,’said Bullfinch, sternly.

‘I am very sorry, but it’s quite impossible to do it, gentlemen,’ pleaded the waiter; ‘and the kitchen —’ ‘Waiter!’ said Mr. Indignation Cocker. ‘ — Is,’ resumed the waiter, ‘so far off, that — ’ ‘Waiter!’ persisted Mr. Indignation Cocker, ‘send somebody.’

We were not without our fears that the waiter rushed out to hang himself; and we were much relieved by his fetching somebody, — in graceful, flowing skirts and with a waist, — who very soon settled Mr. Indignation Cocker’s business.

‘Oh!’ said Mr. Cocker, with his fire surprisingly quenched by this apparition; ‘I wished to ask about this bill of mine, because it appears to me that there’s a little mistake here. Let me show you. Here’s yesterday’s sherry one and eightpence, and here we are again two shillings.

And how do you explain ninepence?’

However it was explained, in tones too soft to be overheard. Mr. Cocker was heard to say nothing more than ‘Ah-h-h! Indeed; thank you! Yes,’ and shortly afterwards went out, a milder man.

The lonely traveller with the stomach-ache had all this time suffered severely, drawing up a leg now and then, and sipping hot brandy-and-water with grated ginger in it. When we tasted our (very) mock-turtle soup, and were instantly seized with symptoms of some disorder simulating apoplexy, and occasioned by the surcharge of nose and brain with lukewarm dishwater holding in solution sour flour, poisonous condiments, and (say) seventy-five per cent. of miscellaneous kitchen stuff rolled into balls, we were inclined to trace his disorder to that source.

On the other hand, there was a silent anguish upon him too strongly resembling the results established within ourselves by the sherry, to be discarded from alarmed consideration. Again, we observed him, with terror, to be much overcome by our sole’s being aired in a temporary retreat close to him, while the waiter went out (as we conceived) to see his friends. And when the curry made its appearance he suddenly retired in great disorder.

In fine, for the uneatable part of this little dinner (as contradistinguished from the undrinkable) we paid only seven shillings and sixpence each.

And Bullfinch and I agreed unanimously, that no such ill-served, ill-appointed, ill-cooked, nasty

Continued on Page 25

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 17

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Victorian country press feature

Pioneer businesses in print

● January 8, 1891

● February 18, 1892

● February 5, 1891

● February 18, 1892

● July 9 1896

● January 8, 1891 ● October 21, 1897

● January 22, 1891

● January 8, 1891

● February 11, 1892

● January 22, 1891

● January 15, 1891

Page 18 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

TRAVEL IN STYLE

Hervey Bay, Qld 5 Reasons to Travel with Northern Sky Limousines Reliability • Comfort • Safety Service & Competitive Pricing • • • •

W eddings Weddings ers Airport T Trransf ansfers Sporting E vents Ev Hospital Pickup and

• Engagements • Special E vents Ev • Gener al Hir e General Hire Drop Offs

Call Now

0416 061 505 www.northernskylimousines.com northernskylimousines@gmail.com

Torbay Retirement Villages Ltd

• Ergonomical • Attractive • Neat and tidy • Helps repel pests naturally • Locally manufactured from Australian steel • Large range of shapes and sizes •The easiest and most appealing way to grow your veggies”

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 19

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Page 20 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Places To Go

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 21

Places To Go

ST PATS RACES YEA Sunday, February 28 Great racing. Great family day out.

Beautiful country setting, wonderful relaxed atmosphere, fabulous crowd.

Entertainment for the whole family.

Fashions on the Field, Vintage Cars, lots of children's activities.

Treat yourself to Fine Dining in the air conditioned Club House, or a three course cold buffet or bring your own picnic lunch.

Marquees and tables under the shady trees for hire

Bookings Ph 5797 3233 or www.countryracing.com.au/yeastpats Come and enjoy racing with a point of difference Picnic Racing at St Pats Yea on February 28

Page 22 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 23

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Page g 24 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, y, February y 17,, 2016

Melbourne

Observer

Travellers’Good Buys

with Michael Osborne

Paradise and the islands of the Pacific

■ How many millions of words have been written? From early explorers such as Captain James Cook. From early travel writers such as Robert Louis Stevenson. And so many more.

We have had a fascination on tropical islands with crystal lagoons inside pounding reefs.

Green mountains staining towards the heavens. Mostly friendly were the Polynesian and Melanesian peoples, well, some didn't like the idea of strangers trying to take over their part of paradise.

Over this period, one of the most visited groups has been the Fiji Islands.

So when the invitation came from Blue Lagoon Cruises to come and explore some of these islands, surrounded by the comfort and safety of one of their specially designed expedition style small ships - we were off.

Blue lagoon Cruises The Four Night Wanderer Cruise Our itinerary includes - The Sacred Islands - Blue Lagoon - Sawa-iLau Island and Drawaqa Island.

A morning coach ride allows us to meet some of the other passengers, as we head to embarkation from Port Denarau, where we will be transferred to the Fiji Princess.

To link with the Fiji Princess, we are ferried in a high-speed catamaran. While enjoying the wonderful islands and reefs as we glide along, we

● Enjoy a meke and Fiji traditions

Melbourne

Observer Wines & Liqueurs

with David Ellis

Versatile Hunter Merlot ■ Margan Family Winegrowers has released a 2014 Merlot that reflects just how good was that year for reds in the Hunter Valley, this one absolutely exploding with wonderful firstup flavours of ripe red berries, spiced plums and cassis.

Made from fruit off vines growing on their own roots in the red volcanic soil of the Broke region, rather than having been grafted onto other stock, this is a great early-drinking style vino whose vibrant fruit and subtle use of oak is nicely rounded out with savoury characters and a good balance of its spicy characteristics.

Best summed up as a medium bodied, softer fruit-driven style with subtle integrated oak, its drinking excellently now but has all the indications of being a drop with great aging potential.

Well priced at $25, you’ll find this 2014 Margan Hunter Valley Merlot a great match with tomato-based pasta or other tomato-based Italian dishes, with beef, pork or chicken barbecues… and as a mate does, a fantastic base for rich red wine sauces.

One to note

■ Pper’s Brook on Tasmania’s north-east coast, Australia’s coolest and southernmost wine region, has released a stunner of a Gewurztraminer from 40 year old vines that are amongst the lowestyielding of any Australian vineyard region – but of absolutely exceptional flavour and character.

And while this wine’s from a 2015 vintage that was somewhat bumpy with a windy and warmer than usual winter and spring and a mild and occasionally damp summer, the result is a drop with a wonderful palate of gingerbread confection, quince paste and lime/citrus, coupled with a fruit sweetness that’s intense but at the same time balanced by low natural residual sugar.

Chief Winemaker Rene Bezemer says at $34 this is amongst the company’s best-ever Gewurztraminers, and ideal with Thai, Indian, Malay and Vietnamese dishes.

Order online www.pipersbrook. com.au

Pictured

■ Wonderful match with tomatobased Italian dishes – or an Aussie barbie.

■ Tassie Gewurztraminer that’s got Thai, Indian, Malay or Vietnamese food-matches written all over it.

are able to enjoy some welcome onboard 'bubbles' and snacks.

As we slow down to navigate a crossing into a large bay, there she is, out home for the next four days, Fiji Princess.

If you are looking for the 'high end' of cruising luxury, then this is not the vessel for you! But if its comfort and a small ship, designed to allow access to magical islands and bays, well, please read on.

Island Time Fiji works on Fiji/island time Fijians live their lives on 'Fiji time' with family and friends as their first priority.

If something doesn't happen now, the Fijians don't worry at it is sure to happen sooner or later.

This can take a bit of getting used to if you are accustomed to westernstyle service where drinks arrive at the snap of a finger and tours are run with military precision.

However, one of the best things about visiting Fiji is that it reminds you to slow down and focus on what is really important: spending time with those you love.

Switch into 'Fiji time' and you will quickly embrace the Fijians' 'don't worry, be happy' vibe.

Guests on board Fiji Princess are enchanted into slowing down, enjoying the moment.

The crew are amongst some of the most courteous and loveable you will meet.

They quickly remember your name and your preferred beverage. Nothing is a trouble.

The ship is very clean and the cabins, although small are well fitted out and the pod coffee maker was a boon for Australian's who enjoy a real tasting coffee.

Meals are delightful, with a great variety of fresh dishes presented on the festive board.

Each of the islands and beaches the various cruises land at have been specially researched by Blue Lagoon, thus allowing passengers the perfect opportunity to enjoy the beauty and to appreciate a Fijian way of life.

A Blue Lagoon Cruise is the perfect place to capture those very special memories, ones that will last a life time.

Usually we try and highlight a special part of the experience, but for this cruise, we couldn't separate them: The arrival in Fiji and the excitement of boarding the ship.

Our first sight of the Fijian Princess.

The Bula welcome.

Sailing around the islands.

The meals and friendliness of the crew.

The Fijian BBQ's on the beach.

Having our own private beach to enjoy.

The entertainment by the crew.

Visiting the schools.

Exploring the islands.

What we can highly recommend is that you contact Blue Lagoon Cruises: www.bluelagooncruises.com and take advantage of the special deal below, or your licensed travel agent today.

Bula!

- Michael Osborne

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 25

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Observer Classic Books From Page 16 little dinner could be got for the money anywhere else under the sun. With that comfort to our backs, we turned them on the dear old Temeraire, the charging Temeraire, and resolved (in the Scotch dialect) to gang nae mair to the flabby Temeraire.

CHAPTER XXXIV— MR. BARLOW A great reader of good fiction at an unusually early age, it seems to me as though I had been born under the superintendence of the estimable but terrific gentleman whose name stands at the head of my present reflections. The instructive monomaniac, Mr. Barlow, will be remembered as the tutor of Master Harry Sandford and Master Tommy Merton. He knew everything, and didactically improved all sorts of occasions, from the consumption of a plate of cherries to the contemplation of a starlight night. What youth came to without Mr. Barlow was displayed in the history of Sandford and Merton, by the example of a certain awful Master Mash. This young wretch wore buckles and powder, conducted himself with insupportable levity at the theatre, had no idea of facing a mad bull singlehanded (in which I think him less reprehensible, as remotely reflecting my own character), and was a frightful instance of the enervating effects of luxury upon the human race.

Strange destiny on the part of Mr. Barlow, to go down to posterity as childhood’s experience of a bore! Immortal Mr. Barlow, boring his way through the verdant freshness of ages!

My personal indictment against Mr. Barlow is one of many counts. I will proceed to set forth a few of the injuries he has done me.

In the first place, he never made or took a joke.

This insensibility on Mr. Barlow’s part not only cast its own gloom over my boyhood, but blighted even the sixpenny jest-books of the time; for, groaning under a moral spell constraining me to refer all things to Mr. Barlow, I could not choose but ask myself in a whisper when tickled by a printed jest, ‘What would HE think of it? What would HE see in it?’ The point of the jest immediately became a sting, and stung my conscience. For my mind’s eye saw him stolid, frigid, perchance taking from its shelf some dreary Greek book, and translating at full length what some dismal sage said (and touched up afterwards, perhaps, for publication), when he banished some unlucky joker from Athens.

The incompatibility of Mr. Barlow with all other portions of my young life but himself, the adamantine inadaptability of the man to my favourite fancies and amusements, is the thing for which I hate him most. What right had he to bore his way into my Arabian Nights? Yet he did. He was always hinting doubts of the veracity of Sindbad the Sailor. If he could have got hold of the Wonderful Lamp, I knew he would have trimmed it and lighted it, and delivered a lecture over it on the qualities of sperm-oil, with a glance at the whale fisheries. He would so soon have found out — on mechanical principles — the peg in the neck of the Enchanted Horse, and would have turned it the right way in so workmanlike a manner, that the horse could never have got any height into the air, and the story couldn’t have been. He would have proved, by map and compass, that there was no such kingdom as the delightful kingdom of Casgar, on the frontiers of Tartary. He would have caused that hypocritical young prig Harry to make an experiment, — with the aid of a temporary building in the garden and a dummy, — demonstrating that you couldn’t let a choked hunchback down an Eastern chimney with a cord, and leave him upright on the hearth to terrify the sultan’s purveyor.

The golden sounds of the overture to the first metropolitan pantomime, I remember, were alloyed by Mr. Barlow. Click click, ting ting, bang bang, weedle weedle weedle, bang! I recall the chilling air that ran across my frame and cooled my hot delight, as the thought occurred to me, ‘This would never do for Mr. Barlow!’After the curtain drew up, dreadful doubts of Mr. Barlow’s considering the costumes of the Nymphs of the Nebula as being sufficiently opaque, obtruded themselves on my enjoyment. In the clown I perceived two persons; one a fascinating unaccountable creature of a hectic complexion, joyous in spirits though feeble in intellect, with flashes of brilliancy; the other a pupil for Mr. Barlow. I thought how Mr. Barlow would secretly rise early in the morning, and butter the pavement for HIM, and, when he had brought him down, would look severely out of his study

window and ask HIM how he enjoyed the fun.

I thought how Mr. Barlow would heat all the pokers in the house, and singe him with the whole collection, to bring him better acquainted with the properties of incandescent iron, on which he (Barlow) would fully expatiate. I pictured Mr. Barlow’s instituting a comparison between the clown’s conduct at his studies, — drinking up the ink, licking his copy-book, and using his head for blotting-paper, — and that of the already mentioned young prig of prigs, Harry, sitting at the Barlovian feet, sneakingly pretending to be in a rapture of youthful knowledge. I thought how soon Mr. Barlow would smooth the clown’s hair down, instead of letting it stand erect in three tall tufts; and how, after a couple of years or so with Mr. Barlow, he would keep his legs close together when he walked, and would take his hands out of his big loose pockets, and wouldn’t have a jump left in him.

That I am particularly ignorant what most things in the universe are made of, and how they are made, is another of my charges against Mr. Barlow. With the dread upon me of developing into a Harry, and with a further dread upon me of being Barlowed if I made inquiries, by bringing down upon myself a cold shower-bath of explanations and experiments, I forbore enlightenment in my youth, and became, as they say in melodramas, ‘the wreck you now behold.’ That I consorted with idlers and dunces is another of the melancholy facts for which I hold Mr. Barlow responsible. That pragmatical prig, Harry, became so detestable in my sight, that, he being reported studious in the South, I would have fled idle to the extremest North. Better to learn misconduct from a Master Mash than science and statistics from a Sandford! So I took the path, which, but for Mr. Barlow, I might never have trodden. Thought I, with a shudder, ‘Mr. Barlow is a bore, with an immense constructive power of making bores. His prize specimen is a bore.

He seeks to make a bore of me. That knowledge is power I am not prepared to gainsay; but, with Mr. Barlow, knowledge is power to bore.’

Therefore I took refuge in the caves of ignorance, wherein I have resided ever since, and which are still my private address.

But the weightiest charge of all my charges against Mr. Barlow is, that he still walks the earth in various disguises, seeking to make a Tommy of me, even in my maturity. Irrepressible, instructive monomaniac, Mr. Barlow fills my life with pitfalls, and lies hiding at the bottom to burst out upon me when I least expect him.

A few of these dismal experiences of mine shall suffice.

Knowing Mr. Barlow to have invested largely in the moving panorama trade, and having on various occasions identified him in the dark with a long wand in his hand, holding forth in his old way (made more appalling in this connection by his sometimes cracking a piece of Mr. Carlyle’s own Dead-Sea fruit in mistake for a joke), I systematically shun pictorial entertainment on rollers. Similarly, I should demand responsible bail and guaranty against the appearance of Mr. Barlow, before committing myself to attendance at any assemblage of my fellow-creatures where a bottle of water and a note-book were conspicuous objects; for in either of those associations, I should expressly expect him. But such is the designing nature of the man, that he steals in where no reasoning precaution or provision could expect him. As in the following case:Adjoining the Caves of Ignorance is a country town. In this country town the Mississippi Momuses, nine in number, were announced to appear in the town-hall, for the general delectation, this last Christmas week. Knowing Mr. Barlow to be unconnected with the Mississippi, though holding republican opinions, and deeming myself secure, I took a stall. My object was to hear and see the Mississippi Momuses in what the bills described as their ‘National ballads, plantation break-downs, nigger part-songs, choice conundrums, sparkling repartees, &c.’ I found the nine dressed alike, in the black coat and trousers, white waistcoat, very large shirtfront, very large shirt-collar, and very large white tie and wristbands, which constitute the dress of the mass of the African race, and which has been observed by travellers to prevail over a vast number of degrees of latitude. All the nine rolled their eyes exceedingly, and had very red lips. At the extremities of the curve they formed, seated in their chairs, were the performers on the tambourine and bones. The centre Momus, a black of melancholy aspect (who inspired me with a vague uneasiness for which I could not

then account), performed on a Mississippi instrument closely resembling what was once called in this island a hurdy-gurdy. The Momuses on either side of him had each another instrument peculiar to the Father of Waters, which may be likened to a stringed weatherglass held upside down. There were likewise a little flute and a violin. All went well for awhile, and we had had several sparkling repartees exchanged between the performers on the tambourine and bones, when the black of melancholy aspect, turning to the latter, and addressing him in a deep and improving voice as ‘Bones, sir,’ delivered certain grave remarks to him concerning the juveniles present, and the season of the year; whereon I perceived that I was in the presence of Mr. Barlow — corked!

Another night — and this was in London — I attended the representation of a little comedy.

As the characters were lifelike (and consequently not improving), and as they went upon their several ways and designs without personally addressing themselves to me, I felt rather confident of coming through it without being regarded as Tommy, the more so, as we were clearly getting close to the end. But I deceived myself. All of a sudden, Apropos of nothing, everybody concerned came to a check and halt, advanced to the foot-lights in a general rally to take dead aim at me, and brought me down with a moral homily, in which I detected the dread hand of Barlow.

Nay, so intricate and subtle are the toils of this hunter, that on the very next night after that, I was again entrapped, where no vestige of a spring could have been apprehended by the timidest. It was a burlesque that I saw performed; an uncompromising burlesque, where everybody concerned, but especially the ladies, carried on at a very considerable rate indeed.

Most prominent and active among the corps of performers was what I took to be (and she really gave me very fair opportunities of coming to a right conclusion) a young lady of a pretty figure. She was dressed as a picturesque young gentleman, whose pantaloons had been cut off in their infancy; and she had very neat knees and very neat satin boots. Immediately after singing a slang song and dancing a slang dance, this engaging figure approached the fatal lamps, and, bending over them, delivered in a thrilling voice a random eulogium on, and exhortation to pursue, the virtues. ‘Great Heaven!’ was my exclamation; ‘Barlow!’

There is still another aspect in which Mr. Barlow perpetually insists on my sustaining the character of Tommy, which is more unendurable yet, on account of its extreme aggressiveness. For the purposes of a review or newspaper, he will get up an abstruse subject with definite pains, will Barlow, utterly regardless of the price of midnight oil, and indeed of everything else, save cramming himself to the eyes.

But mark. When Mr. Barlow blows his information off, he is not contented with having rammed it home, and discharged it upon me, Tommy, his target, but he pretends that he was always in possession of it, and made nothing of it, — that he imbibed it with mother’s milk, — and that I, the wretched Tommy, am most abjectly behindhand in not having done the same. I ask, why is Tommy to be always the foil of Mr. Barlow to this extent? What Mr. Barlow had not the slightest notion of himself, a week ago, it surely cannot be any very heavy backsliding in me not to have at my fingers’ ends to-day! And yet Mr. Barlow systematically carries it over me with a high hand, and will tauntingly ask me, in his articles, whether it is possible that I am not aware that every school-boy knows that the fourteenth turning on the left in the steppes of Russia will conduct to such and such a wandering tribe? with other disparaging questions of like nature.

So, when Mr. Barlow addresses a letter to any journal as a volunteer correspondent (which I frequently find him doing), he will previously have gotten somebody to tell him some tremendous technicality, and will write in the coolest manner, ‘Now, sir, I may assume that every reader of your columns, possessing average information and intelligence, knows as well as I do that’ — say that the draught from the touchhole of a cannon of such a calibre bears such a proportion in the nicest fractions to the draught from the muzzle; or some equally familiar little fact. But whatever it is, be certain that it always tends to the exaltation of Mr. Barlow, and the depression of his enforced and enslaved pupil.

Mr. Barlow’s knowledge of my own pursuits I find to be so profound, that my own knowledge

of them becomes as nothing. Mr. Barlow (disguised and bearing a feigned name, but detected by me) has occasionally taught me, in a sonorous voice, from end to end of a long dinnertable, trifles that I took the liberty of teaching him five-and-twenty years ago. My closing article of impeachment against Mr. Barlow is, that he goes out to breakfast, goes out to dinner, goes out everywhere, high and low, and that he WILL preach to me, and that I CAN’T get rid of him.

He makes me a Promethean Tommy, bound; and he is the vulture that gorges itself upon the liver of my uninstructed mind.

CHAPTERXXXV—ONANAMATEUR BEAT It is one of my fancies, that even my idlest walk must always have its appointed destination. I set myself a task before I leave my lodging in Covent-garden on a street expedition, and should no more think of altering my route by the way, or turning back and leaving a part of it unachieved, than I should think of fraudulently violating an agreement entered into with somebody else. The other day, finding myself under this kind of obligation to proceed to Limehouse, I started punctually at noon, in compliance with the terms of the contract with myself to which my good faith was pledged.

On such an occasion, it is my habit to regard my walk as my beat, and myself as a higher sort of police-constable doing duty on the same. There is many a ruffian in the streets whom I mentally collar and clear out of them, who would see mighty little of London, I can tell him, if I could deal with him physically.

Issuing forth upon this very beat, and following with my eyes three hulking garrotters on their way home, — which home I could confidently swear to be within so many yards of Drury-lane, in such a narrow and restricted direction (though they live in their lodging quite as undisturbed as I in mine), — I went on duty with a consideration which I respectfully offer to the new Chief Commissioner, — in whom I thoroughly confide as a tried and efficient public servant. How often (thought I) have I been forced to swallow, in police-reports, the intolerable stereotyped pill of nonsense, how that the police-constable informed the worthy magistrate how that the associates of the prisoner did, at that present speaking, dwell in a street or court which no man dared go down, and how that the worthy magistrate had heard of the dark reputation of such street or court, and how that our readers would doubtless remember that it was always the same street or court which was thus edifyingly discoursed about, say once a fortnight.

Now, suppose that a Chief Commissioner sent round a circular to every division of police employed in London, requiring instantly the names in all districts of all such much-puffed streets or courts which no man durst go down; and suppose that in such circular he gave plain warning, ‘If those places really exist, they are a proof of police inefficiency which I mean to punish; and if they do not exist, but are a conventional fiction, then they are a proof of lazy tacit police connivance with professional crime, which I also mean to punish’ — what then? Fictions or realities, could they survive the touchstone of this atom of common sense? To tell us in open court, until it has become as trite a feature of news as the great gooseberry, that a costly police-system such as was never before heard of, has left in London, in the days of steam and gas and photographs of thieves and electric telegraphs, the sanctuaries and stews of the Stuarts! Why, a parity of practice, in all departments, would bring back the Plague in two summers, and the Druids in a century!

Walking faster under my share of this public injury, I overturned a wretched little creature, who, clutching at the rags of a pair of trousers with one of its claws, and at its ragged hair with the other, pattered with bare feet over the muddy stones. I stopped to raise and succour this poor weeping wretch, and fifty like it, but of both sexes, were about me in a moment, begging, tumbling, fighting, clamouring, yelling, shivering in their nakedness and hunger. The piece of money I had put into the claw of the child I had over-turned was clawed out of it, and was again clawed out of that wolfish gripe, and again out of that, and soon I had no notion in what part of the obscene scuffle in the mud, of rags and legs and arms and dirt, the money might be. In raising the child, I had drawn it aside out of the main thoroughfare, and this took place among some

Continued on Page 26

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Page 26 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Observer Classic Books From Page 25 wooden hoardings and barriers and ruins of demolished buildings, hard by Temple Bar. Unexpectedly, from among them emerged a genuine police-constable, before whom the dreadful brood dispersed in various directions, he making feints and darts in this direction and in that, and catching nothing. When all were frightened away, he took off his hat, pulled out a handkerchief from it, wiped his heated brow, and restored the handkerchief and hat to their places, with the air of a man who had discharged a great moral duty, — as indeed he had, in doing what was set down for him. I looked at him, and I looked about at the disorderly traces in the mud, and I thought of the drops of rain and the footprints of an extinct creature, hoary ages upon ages old, that geologists have identified on the face of a cliff; and this speculation came over me: If this mud could petrify at this moment, and could lie concealed here for ten thousand years, I wonder whether the race of men then to be our successors on the earth could, from these or any marks, by the utmost force of the human intellect, unassisted by tradition, deduce such an astounding inference as the existence of a polished state of society that bore with the public savagery of neglected children in the streets of its capital city, and was proud of its power by sea and land, and never used its power to seize and save them!

After this, when I came to the Old Bailey and glanced up it towards Newgate, I found that the prison had an inconsistent look. There seemed to be some unlucky inconsistency in the atmosphere that day; for though the proportions of St. Paul’s Cathedral are very beautiful, it had an air of being somewhat out of drawing, in my eyes.

I felt as though the cross were too high up, and perched upon the intervening golden ball too far away.

Facing eastward, I left behind me Smithfield and Old Bailey, — fire and faggot, condemned hold, public hanging, whipping through the city at the cart-tail, pillory, branding-iron, and other beautiful ancestral landmarks, which rude hands have rooted up, without bringing the stars quite down upon us as yet, — and went my way upon my beat, noting how oddly characteristic neighbourhoods are divided from one another, hereabout, as though by an invisible line across

the way. Here shall cease the bankers and the money-changers; here shall begin the shipping interest and the nautical-instrument shops; here shall follow a scarcely perceptible flavouring of groceries and drugs; here shall come a strong infusion of butchers; now, small hosiers shall be in the ascendant; henceforth, everything exposed for sale shall have its ticketed price attached.

All this as if specially ordered and appointed.

A single stride at Houndsditch Church, no wider than sufficed to cross the kennel at the bottom of the Canon-gate, which the debtors in Holyrood sanctuary were wont to relieve their minds by skipping over, as Scott relates, and standing in delightful daring of catchpoles on the free side, — a single stride, and everything is entirely changed in grain and character. West of the stride, a table, or a chest of drawers on sale, shall be of mahogany and French-polished; east of the stride, it shall be of deal, smeared with a cheap counterfeit resembling lip-salve. West of the stride, a penny loaf or bun shall be compact and self-contained; east of the stride, it shall be of a sprawling and splay-footed character, as seeking to make more of itself for the money.

My beat lying round by Whitechapel Church, and the adjacent sugar-refineries, — great buildings, tier upon tier, that have the appearance of being nearly related to the dock-warehouses at Liverpool, — I turned off to my right, and, passing round the awkward corner on my left, came suddenly on an apparition familiar to London streets afar off.

What London peripatetic of these times has not seen the woman who has fallen forward, double, through some affection of the spine, and whose head has of late taken a turn to one side, so that it now droops over the back of one of her arms at about the wrist? Who does not know her staff, and her shawl, and her basket, as she gropes her way along, capable of seeing nothing but the pavement, never begging, never stopping, for ever going somewhere on no business? How does she live, whence does she come, whither does she go, and why? I mind the time when her yellow arms were naught but bone and parchment. Slight changes steal over her; for there is a shadowy suggestion of human skin on them now. The Strand may be taken as the central point about which she revolves in a half-mile orbit. How comes she so far east as this? And

Melbourne

ObserverLooking for a

Professional to run the show? ★ Compere/Host ★ Auctioneer ★ Promotions ★ A-Grade Journalist ★ Voice-Over Commercials ★ Race Caller All Sports, Race Nights ★ TV, Radio, Press ★ Respected Member of the Media

Ted Ryan Phone 9876 1652 Mobile: 0412 682 927 E-Mail: tedryan@australiaonline.net.au ted.ryan@optusnet.com.au

coming back too! Having been how much farther? She is a rare spectacle in this neighbourhood. I receive intelligent information to this effect from a dog — a lop-sided mongrel with a foolish tail, plodding along with his tail up, and his ears pricked, and displaying an amiable interest in the ways of his fellow-men, — if I may be allowed the expression. After pausing at a pork-shop, he is jogging eastward like myself, with a benevolent countenance and a watery mouth, as though musing on the many excellences of pork, when he beholds this doubled-up bundle approaching. He is not so much astonished at the bundle (though amazed by that), as the circumstance that it has within itself the means of locomotion. He stops, pricks his ears higher, makes a slight point, stares, utters a short, low growl, and glistens at the nose, — as I conceive with terror. The bundle continuing to approach, he barks, turns tail, and is about to fly, when, arguing with himself that flight is not becoming in a dog, he turns, and once more faces the advancing heap of clothes. After much hesitation, it occurs to him that there may be a face in it somewhere. Desperately resolving to undertake the adventure, and pursue the inquiry, he goes slowly up to the bundle, goes slowly round it, and coming at length upon the human countenance down there where never human countenance should be, gives a yelp of horror, and flies for the East India Docks.

Being now in the Commercial Road district of my beat, and bethinking myself that Stepney Station is near, I quicken my pace that I may turn out of the road at that point, and see how my small eastern star is shining.

The Children’s Hospital, to which I gave that name, is in full force. All its beds are occupied.

There is a new face on the bed where my pretty baby lay, and that sweet little child is now at rest for ever. Much kind sympathy has been here since my former visit, and it is good to see the walls profusely garnished with dolls. I wonder what Poodles may think of them, as they stretch out their arms above the beds, and stare, and display their splendid dresses. Poodles has a greater interest in the patients. I find him making the round of the beds, like a house-surgeon, attended by another dog, — a friend, — who appears to trot about with him in the character of his pupil dresser. Poodles is anxious to make

me known to a pretty little girl looking wonderfully healthy, who had had a leg taken off for cancer of the knee. A difficult operation, Poodles intimates, wagging his tail on the counterpane, but perfectly successful, as you see, dear sir!

The patient, patting Poodles, adds with a smile, ‘The leg was so much trouble to me, that I am glad it’s gone.’ I never saw anything in doggery finer than the deportment of Poodles, when another little girl opens her mouth to show a peculiar enlargement of the tongue. Poodles (at that time on a table, to be on a level with the occasion) looks at the tongue (with his own sympathetically out) so very gravely and knowingly that I feel inclined to put my hand in my waistcoat-pocket, and give him a guinea, wrapped in paper.

On my beat again, and close to Limehouse Church, its termination, I found myself near to certain ‘Lead-Mills.’ Struck by the name, which was fresh in my memory, and finding, on inquiry, that these same lead-mills were identified with those same lead-mills of which I made mention when I first visited the East London Children’s Hospital and its neighbourhood as Uncommercial Traveller, I resolved to have a look at them.

Received by two very intelligent gentlemen, brothers, and partners with their father in the concern, and who testified every desire to show their works to me freely, I went over the leadmills. The purport of such works is the conversion of pig-lead into white-lead. This conversion is brought about by the slow and gradual effecting of certain successive chemical changes in the lead itself. The processes are picturesque and interesting, — the most so, being the burying of the lead, at a certain stage of preparation, in pots, each pot containing a certain quantity of acid besides, and all the pots being buried in vast numbers, in layers, under tan, for some ten weeks.

Hopping up ladders, and across planks, and on elevated perches, until I was uncertain whether to liken myself to a bird or a brick-layer, I became conscious of standing on nothing particular, looking down into one of a series of large cocklofts, with the outer day peeping in through the chinks in the tiled roof above. A number of women were ascending to, and descending from, this cockloft, each carrying on the upward journey a pot of prepared lead and acid, for deposition under the smoking tan.

To Be Continued Next Issue

Observer Crossword Solution No 7

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Obser ver - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 27 e urn lbo Me

Every Week in the Melbourne Observer

ver N ser O Ob TI C SE 3

Observer Showbiz

Radio: 3AW’s bedroom broadcasts ...................... Page 28 Theatre: Kris’s ‘love affair’ ............................................... Page 29 Country Music: Rob Foenander’s round-up ................ Page 28 Jim and Aar on: Top 10 lists, reviews .................................... P age 30 Aaron: Cheryl Threadgold: Local theatre shows, auditions ........... Page 31 PL US THE LLO OVATT”S MEGA CRO PLUS CROSSSWORD

LOOKING FOR LAWSON Mozart By Moonlight

● Lee Abrahmsen (Konstanze) and Nick Pelomis (Pasha Selim) in The Abduction from the Seraglio.

Photo: Jodie Hutchinson ■ Melbourne Opera and the Australian Shakespeare Company will present Mozart By Moonlight in the Royal Botanic Gardens (enter via the Observatory Gate on Birdwood Ave on Sunday, March 6 at 6pm Experience a special concert. Hear arias from Mozart’s best-known operas and enjoy the voices of Melbourne’s most accomplished up and coming artists, accompanied by the company’s orchestra.

Tickets: www.shakespeareaustralia.com.au/mozartby-moonlight.html ★ Melbourne Opera will also present a fourth performance of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart’s delightful comedy The Abduction from the Seraglio on March 19 at 8pm at the Monash Music Academy Auditorium.

Suzanne Chaundy, who directs all 2016 productions for Melbourne Opera, has set the opera in a 1970s exotic world of glamour and mystery.

“I fell in love with the charm, wit and glorious music of The Abduction from the Seraglio when I first encountered it working with the Victoria State Opera in 1992,” says Suzanne.

“Musically this opera is a clear predecessor of The Magic Flute and story-wise reminiscent of Cosi fan Tutte in its exploration of complex relationships, fidelity and the allure of the foreign.”

Melbourne Opera has once again assembled an all-star cast featuring Herald Sun Aria winner Lee Abrahmsen as the imprisoned Konstanze with Hannah Dahlenburg as her smart assistant Blonde, hot on the heels of her principal role in Opera Australia’s 2016 production of The Magic Flute.

Accomplished international tenor Christopher Lincoln Bogg plays the brave rescuer Belmonte, with Melbourne Opea regular Paul Biencourt as Pedrillo and international bass Eddie Muliaumaseali'i as Osmin, who sings the lowest notes in the operatic repertoire.

Actor Nick Pelomis plays kidnapping billionaire Pasha Selim. The dedicated Melbourne Opera chorus support the main cast as a mix of the Pasha’s staff, guards and other people he has drawn into his world of beauty.

After a sold-out inaugural tour of China, Greg Hocking and the Melbourne Opera orchestra have returned to perform Mozart’s rarely staged masterpiece.

Bookings: www.melbourneopera.com - Cheryl Threadgold

Showbiz Briefs

■ Weekend Today co-host Cameron Williams has left Nine after 10 years with the network.

■ Brad Hulme has been appointed Executive Producer for KIIS 101.1’s Breakfast show with Matt Tilley and Meshel Laurie.

■ Melbourne-based Rose Houghton has been appointed an Associate Producer for 9news.com.au

By CHERYL THREADGOLD

● Henry Lawson. Artwork by David McCubbin ■ Australian poet Henry Lawson is re-discovered in Looking For Lawson, a song cycle of Lawson’s most beautiful poems set to music by composer John Thorn.

The audience will be guided through Lawson’s life, as his poems give an insight into the mind of the man and how his ideas unfolded. This is a remarkable and moving story of one of Australia’s great writers in his own words.

Henry Lawson was born in 1867 at Grenfell on the NSW goldfields. He left school at 13, was deaf at 14, and yet by the age of 20 was one of the most celebrated writers in Australia, with publication of his poems and short stories in the Sydney Bulletin.

The last 20 years of Lawson’s life were spent in poverty, suffering from the effects of alcoholism and mental illness.

Lawson died in 1922 and was given a State Funeral where 100,000 people lined the streets of Sydney to celebrate his life and work.

John Thorn is joined on stage by Australian performer Lindsay Field (John Farnham band) and Emily Taheny (AACTA award nominee for ABC-TV’s Mad As Hell).

The show features 20 songs, and Thorn uses a range of styles including Marches, Tangos, English Music Hall, European and Irish Folk tunes and Torch Songs to bring the depth of emotion to Lawson’s words.

Looking For Lawson was conceived after John Thorn took a trip with his father retracing Lawson's steps through Western NSW in September 2013.

Various events were planned along the way including a debate between the merits of Lawson and Banjo Patterson.

Thorn knew little about Lawson and after reading the works of Lawson decided to offer some musical settings for the poems.

Looking For Lawson premiered in Bourke a year later at the Festival Of 1000 Stories.

John Thorn is an award-winning composer and musical director. He has written five musicals and many scores for cabaret shows and special events.

He has accompanied many of Australia's finest performers at local and overseas festivals and has an international reputation for his work in improvised theatre as musical director and producer for Spontaneous Broadway and Random Musical.

Performance Season: Wednesday February 17, 24, March 2, 9 at 7.30pm Venue: Bella Union, Trades Hall, Cnr Lygon and Victoria Sts., Carlton.

Tickets: from $17.

Bookings: bellaunion.com.au / 9650 5699 - Cheryl Threadgold

Daisy Berry

● Daisy Berry ■ Daisy Berry presents her debut solo show Am I Mental? for the Melbourne International Comedy Festival from April 5-17 at The Highlander Club.

Comedian Daisy is asking people to openly judge her and her mental health, live in person at her new show. Hear about her life, her family and how she met her dad for the first time when she was sixteen.

Her show is written to remove the stigma around mental health.

Daisy says: “We’re all a little bit crazy and judgemental and Am I Mental? embraces that.”

“Why not get others to judge you and your history on your terms?”

In a brave and revealing 50 minutes of stand up, Berry will leave no section of her life untouched, unexplored or unjudged.

Daisy has performed to sell-out crowds at the Adelaide Fringe Festival and Feast Festival, the largest queer festival in Adelaide. Well known on the Melbourne stand up circuit for her honest material and self-deprecating wit, Daisy has also performed in successful joint shows at MICF (2013, 2015) and Midsumma (2016).

Performances:April 5-17 at 8.30pm Tickets: $20/$15 Venue: Highlander Bar, 11A Highlander Lane, Melbourne. Bookings: www.comedyfestival.com.au - Cheryl Threadgold

Media Flashes

■ Rachel Baxendale has been appointed a Political Reporter for The Australian.

■ James Dean has been appointed as a cadet at ABC News Melbourne. James previously worked as a journalist for OneFM 98.5 and Shepparton News.

■ Kate Gibbs has joined Delicious as Digital Editor.

■ Louise Baxter has left her roles as Deputy Editor of Western Australian lifestyle magazine, Scoop, and is moving to Melbourne.

■ The Yea Chronicle is seeking a new Editor.

■ Kim Wilson has been appointed Editor-in-Chief of The Australian Women’s Weekly.

Page 28 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Observer Showbiz

Radio Confidential News from stations from around Victoria

3AW’s bedroom broadcasts

Country Crossroads info@country crossroads.com.au Rob Foenander

Our kinda country

■ The annual Our Kinda Country Good Friday Appeal returns on Sunday, March 13.

The Royal Exchange Hotel in Traralgon will play host to a number of country music artists volunteering their time and talents for the cause.

Chris Newman and Yesteryear, Ryan Shaun, Evan Platchinda, Bill Rowley, Ky and Jodie plus others will share the stage throughout the day commencing 12 noon. All proceeds will go to the RCH Good Friday Appeal.

Second show for M&M

■ Due to popular demand, the Flying Saucer Club, Elsternwick, has announced a second show for Mick Pealing and Mal Eastick.

The Australian music legends and original members of iconic group, The Stars, once again return to the stage together for an exclusive performance playing the songs of Andy Durant and The Stars.

Sunday (Feb. 21), 3.30pm.

New album for Billy

■ Melbourne singer-songwriter Billy Bridge has released his new album of work titled Stories Through Time.

The album is his finest work to date and has already caused a stir in the country music industry says Billy's website.

More info: www.billybridge.com - Rob Foenander

More Showbiz Briefs

■ The Australian Financial Review has announced that Bryce Corbett will be joining as co-author of gossip column Rear Window, and Senior Writer.

■ Monique Hore has been appointed a City Reporter for the Herald Sun. ■ The Nine Network’s Mornings has been re-branded to Today Extra.

■ Kristy-Lee Lorraway has joined the Seven Network as the Entertainment Producer for Sunday Night.

■ Geelong-region publisher Provincial Media has launched Business Life. Jon Zabiegala is Managing Editor.

r Obser vbeiz On This Day Show

Wednesday Thursday February 17 February 18

■ Folk poet Andrew ‘Banjo’ Paterson was born in NSW in 1864.

He died aged 76 in 1941.

British actress Patricia Routledge was born in Cheshire, England, in 1929 (87).

US singer-songwriter Gene Pitney was born in 1940. He died aged 66 in 2006.

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

■ Sports commentator Rex Mossop was born in 1928. He died aged 83 in 2011.

Director-producer Milos Forman was born in Czechoslovakia in 1932 (84).

Artist and musician Yoko Ono was born in Japan in 1933 (83).

Actor John Travolta was born in 1954 (62).

■ First it was Neil Mitchell, broadcasting his 3AW morning program, flat on his back in his livingroom.

Next it was Ross Stevenson, after back surgery, bringing his breakfast show from his Kew home.

And now 3AWhas taken an ‘outside broadcast’ facility to Bruce Mansfield’s Eaglemont home, so he can join Philip Brady on the Nightline program, Monday-Thursday.

The OB link started on Monday this week (Feb. 15).

Bruce is fighting prostate cancer, and after January 27 found travelling to the Docklands studios too onerous.

3AW Melbourne boss Stephen Beers organised the technical set-up at Bruce Mansfield’s home.

In past weeks, stand-in hosts have included Simon Owens, Andrew McLaren, Mike Brady and Patti Newton.

At MMM ■ Jason Taylor has started worked on the sound engineering operations for Triple M football broadcasts.

Jason is known for his work at 3AW and SEN. He is the son of Casey FM broadcaster Leigh Drew.

From the US

■ Kent Small (‘Smallzy’) is presenting his Nova 100 evening program from West Hollywood.

Station Publicity Director Jane Elliott says he is in Los Angeles for the 58th Annual GrammyAwards.

Smallzy’s Surgery will be heard across the Nova Network from 7pm-10pm, until Friday (Feb. 19).

Briefs

Do yourself a favour

■ Former 3AW Nightline and Remember When producer Paige McGinley has been a central figure in a follow-up TV program on Ian Meldrum, due to air on Channel 7 at 8.30 Sunday (Feb. 21).

Her involvement follows the ratings success of the Molly series over the past two weekends on the Seven Network.

The first week of the program attended a five-city metro audience of 1.79 million viewers.

● Molly Meldrum and Paige McGinley

● Bruce Mansfield: fighting prostate cancer

Accident for Matt Tiiley

● Matt Tilley

■ KIIS FM announcer Matt Tilley is recovering after being hit by a car while cycling in Melbourne.

Matt's KIIS 101.1 co-host Meshel Laurie revealed the incident live on-air, confirming that her colleague and friend was involved in the accident, but is on the mend.

“I'm just reading here, they've stitched his head, but nothing is broken, he's battered and bruised,: she told Monty Dimond, who stepped in for Matt on the show.

- Greg Newman, Jocks Journal

■ Erin O’Dwyer is the new Researcher and Producer for ABC Classic FM’s weekday interview program Midday with Margaret Throsby.

■ Triple M’s football broadcasts are in the air with anchor Garry Lyon temporarily out of action, reportedly seeking treatment for a mental health issue.

Lyon, Footy Show co-host, hit the headlines at the weekend, because of a feud with longtime colleague Billy Brownless. Channel 9 says Lyon’s cohost James Brayshaw is likely to helm the TV show solo in the meantime.

■ Pacific Star Network, operators of SEN and 3MP, now also have a Greek digital radio station.

Old links

■ Neil Mitchell, 3AW’s morning presenter, was talking about a Catholic Church issue. He referred to the Church’s media manager as “:our own Shane Healy”. Healy left the station in November 2014.

Melbourne

Observer

Friday Saturday February 19 February 20 ■ English actor Dick Emery was born in England in 1918. He died aged 65 in 1983.

Actor Lee Marvin was born in New York in 1924. He died aged 63 in 1987.

Prince Andrew was born in 1960 (55).

Actress Zoe Carides was born in Sydney in 1962 (53).

■ Fashion designer Gloria Vanderbilt was born in New York in 1934 (91).

Actor Sir Sidney Pottier was born in Miami, Florida, in 1927 (89).

Football commentator Neil Kerley was born in South Australia in 1934.

Actress Lisa Hemsley was born in 1968.

Sunday Monday February 21 February 22

■ Actor Kelsey Grammer was born in the Virgin Islands in 1955 (61).

American actor Christopher Atkins was born in New York in 1961 (55).

US actor William Baldwin, younger brother of Alec, was born in New York in 1963 (53).

■ Lord Baden-Powell, founder of Scouts, was born in 1857. He died aged 83 in 1941.

Australian director and producer Ken G Hall was born in 1901. He died aged 92.

US actor Robert Young (Father Knows Best) was born in 1907. He died aged 91 in 1998.

Tuesday February 23 ■ Former Australian Prime Minister Sir William McMahon was born in Sydney in 1908. He died aged 80 in 1988.

Actor Peter Fonda was born in New York in 1939 (75).

English actress Emily Blunt was born in London in 1981 (32).

Her work includes Devil Wears Prada.

Thanks to GREG NEWMAN of Jocks Journal for assistance with birthday and anniversary dates.

Jocks Journal is Australia’s longest running radio industry publication.

Find out more at www.jocksjournal.com

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

ShowBiz!

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 29

Observer Showbiz

New boss at SEN

● George Papadopoulos ■ With a career history that includes management positions at JB Hi-Fi and WIN Corporation, George Papadopoulos has been named as the new CEO at Pacific Star Network, which operates SEN and 3MP radio stations, and publishing interests which include Inside Football.

He has been signed on a three-year contract, which started on January 19. His initial salary is $300,000 per year, plus $25,000 superannuation. He will be eligible for incentives up to $30,000.

In The Heights ■ StageArt in association with the National Theatre in St Kilda, presents the return season of In The Heights, for three shows only on March 11 and 12.

The show is a salsa and rap infused musical that challenges the stereotype of modern day musical theatre, bringing the Washington Heights neighbourhood back to the stage in 2016.

In a community where everyone knows your business, things are about to get a shake-up as romances bloom and dreams are challenged.

Winner of the Tony Award for Best Musical, and Pulitzer Prize nominee, In The Heights is a fun and fresh hip-hop musical set in a sizzling summer filled with music and possibilities.

Featuring members of the original StageArt cast: Usnavi: Stephen Lopez (Pirates Of The Caribbean, Underbelly, Fat Tony & Co, Neighbours); Nina: Anna Francesca Armenia (Dreamgirls, Jason Coleman’s Cabaret Cathedral); Benny: James Elmer (ABC 3, Studio 3 Host).

Vanessa: Bianca Baykara (The King and I, An Officer and AGentleman, West Side Story, Company); Daniela: Laura Marcucci (Mamma Mia); Abuella Claudia: Francesca Arena (Cats, Fiddler On The Roof, Les Misérables, Follies); Sonny: Andrew Doyle (Victorian College of the Arts); Graffiti Pete: Peter Sette (National Hip Hop Champion); Piragua Guy: Gareth Jacobs (Royal Caribbean Cruises, Dreamgirls, Jason Coleman’s Cabaret Cathedral); Carla: Sarah Calsiña (Dreamgirls, Hair); Camilla: Bianca Bruce; Kevin: Clarence Marshall; Ensemble: MaverickAzzopardi,Tania De Stratis,Timothy Doherty, Jayme-Lee Hanekom, Joshua Martin, Hëna Memishi, Sophie Stewart, Gary Yong.

It also brings back together Director, James Cutler; Music Director, Cameron Thomas; and Executive Producers, Robbie Carmellotti and Katherine Armstrong. And re-staging Yvette Lee’s choreography will be iconic Melbourne Hip Hop dancer and choreographer Phill Haddad.

Music and Lyrics by Lin-Manuel Miranda – his new musical, Hamilton open on Broadway earlier this year to critical and audience acclaim. Book by Quiara Alegria Hudes in association with Origin Theatrical.

Performances: March 11 at 7.30pm; March 12 at 1pm and 7.30pm Venue: The National Theatre, 20 Carlisle St., St Kilda.

Bookings: 9525 4611. www.stageart.com.au - Cheryl Threadgold

Auditions at STAG ■ Strathmore TheatricalArts Group (STAG): Come Blow Your Horn (by Neil Simon) March 6 at 6pm and March 7 at 7.30pm at the Strathmore Community Hall, Cnr Napier and Loeman Sts, Strathmore. Director: Mark Stratford. Audition enquiries: fencemanfix@gmail.com

TV, Radio, Theatre Latest Melbourne show business news - without fear or favour

Kris’s love affair

■ Kris Weber says she has had a love affair with the stage, and the actors and directors who honour it, for many years.

Recently she celebrated involvement in her 60th production.

Her participation in the performing arts includes acting, directing, and reviewing and writing theatre articles for both print and electronic periodicals.

Kris is also the Plays Editor at Theatrepeople. com, has been an in-house adjudicator for various Melbourne theatre companies, and runs successful theatre workshops for small groups of actors.

She has also been a critical observer and advisor to VCE Theatre Studies students, preparatory to their performance exams.

Kris’s next project is directing Killing Jeremy, her ninth play with Strathmore Theatrical Art Group (STAG), which opens in Strathmore on March 3.

She says Killing Jeremy is a fascinating study of the mind, as well as a successful discourse about guilt, loss and forgiveness.

“It is a play done in the abstract which, as a director, is highly attractive to me,” says Kris.

“Playwright Bridgette Burton explores some pretty horrific ideas with humour, honesty and an Australian sensibility which, at times, can be laconic.

“A two-hander is one

● Kris Weber, director of Killing Jeremy. of my favourite texts to style.” work with.

Kris says their aim is “It means comprehen- to offer the audience an sive and incisive work and immersive theatre expelonger time for exploration rience, while being fully during the rehearsal pro- cognizant of the real hucess. man drama unfolding be“The play is, for me, a fore them. homage to many truths “It is hoped this producabout relationships - par- tion resonates with auditicularly when things go ences for a long while afirreparably awry.” ter viewing. That, for me, Kris says STAG's cosy is the mark of good thetheatre space is the per- atre.” fect venue for this style of Performance Season: voyeuristic story telling.

March 3 – 5, 10 – 12 at “Set designer Chris 8pm; March 6, 13 at 2pm Baldock was interested in Venue: Strathmore creating an intimate stage, and has successfully Community Theatre, Cnr. transported the main act- Loeman and Napier Sts., ing space onto the floor. Strathmore Tickets: $20/$15 “Other technical fanBookings: 9382 6284 cies have been devised to Cheryl Threadgold complement Burton's

David’s ‘Mystica’ ■ After a successful run of sell-out shows at The Butterfly Club, David Stewart returns to Melbourne on March 5 and 6 at 7pm with more psychological illusions in The Mystica.

Hypnosis, psychology and magic combine to take audiences on a journey through their own minds.

After religiously studying the ancient techniques of mystics and psychics, 23year-old David returns to The Butterfly Club as the beginning of his 2016 tour, to redefine what is perceived as possible.

Tickets available at www. thebutterflyclub.com and more about David at www.davidstewartmagic.co.uk Dates: March 5 and 6 Time: 7pm Cost: $25-38 Venue: The Butterfly Club, 5 Carson Place, Melbourne Tickets: www.thebutterflyclub.com - Cheryl Threadgold ● Pictured (at right): David Stewart

Absurd Person Singular ■ Absurd Person Singular by Alan Ayckbourn, is a unique style of play, three acts, set in the UK, with no particular storyline.

It is a humourous, fast moving piece that requires good comic timing and clever direction. This production had both, yet not consistently.

The first act became a bit tedious by the end, the highlight being the actors’ entrances and exits to and from the kitchen and their change of mood.

The stand out of the second act is an out of control hound- heard not seen, and the third act has some entertaining dancing. The dialogue is quick and there are visual comic moments.

The actors are well rehearsed and had a good rapport with each other, I particularly enjoyed the energy of Tim Paige, his character in acts two and three jovial and upbeat .

Accents were inconsistent and there were some lack-lustre moments that should be overcome as the season continues.

As a first time director Grant Foulkes had some clever ideas but lacked some attention to detail.

The costumes were one such area, whilst some characters had a different wardrobe in each of the three years, others wore the same.

I was quite distracted by Ronald’s oversized suit throughout.

Another annoyance was that Jane did not turn off the oven (see the show, you will understand), I was waiting for something to happen as result of this, but realised it was an oversight.

Small things, yet on an intimate stage can detract from the script.

Presented by Mofo Theatre Company, the venue was inviting, cosy bean bags or couches to sit on, and of course the big draw card- complimentary wines on offer – a lovely way to spend a night at the theatre.

Performance Season: Until February 21 Venue: Kindred Studios, 212A Whitehall St, Yarraville.

Tickets: $49/$39 Bookings: mofotc.eventbrite.com.au - Review by Elizabeth Semmel

Janice Muller job ■ Malthouse Theatre has announced Janice Muller as the Director in Residence for 2016 as a part of the Female Director in Residence program, now in its sixth year.

The annual position provides intensive career development and a salary, and aims to offer a deeply engaged professional development opportunity that provides for genuine career progression towards professional theatre practice.

Malthouse Theatre’s ongoing support of female theatre-makers and artists is also extended through the inaugural Malthouse Theatre In House Tower Residency program, a list that includes Nicola Gunn, The Rabble, Samara Hersch and Adena Jacobs (Fraught Outfit).

Malthouse Theatre Artistic Director Matthew Lutton said: “We are thrilled to have Janice Muller joining Malthouse Theatre as a resident director in 2016. I have no doubt she will be an integral part of the on-going artistic conversations at the company throughout the year.”

Janice Muller recently directed The Tribe in Surry Hills backyards for Belvoir/Urban Theatre Projects.

This new Australian work, co-adapted with Mohammed Ahmad from his novella of the same name, premiered in 2015 at Sydney Festival as part of Bankstown Live.

In April, Muller will direct the premiere of Lake Disappointment, a new Australian play written by Luke Mullins and Lachlan Philpott for Carriageworks.

Over a 10-month period, Muller will be immersed in the day-to-day activities of Malthouse Theatre, receive mentoring and support to develop her own projects, as well as directing the Malthouse Theatre Education Program production.

- Cheryl Threadgold

Page 30 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Observer Showbiz What’s Hot and What’s Not in Blu-Rays and DVDs

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Movies, DVDs With Jim Sherlock and Aaron Rourke

Rourke’s Reviews Sicario

● Matt Damon stranded alone 140 million miles from home in Ridley Scott's outstanding science fiction adventure The Martian.

FILM: THE MARTIAN: Genre: Action/Adventure/Sci-Fi. Cast: Matt Damon, Jessica Chastain, Kristen Wiig, Jeff Daniels, Sean Bean.

Details: 2015/ M/141 Minutes.

Stars: **** Verdict: During a manned mission to Mars, an Astronaut is presumed dead after a violent storm and left behind by his crew. However, he is alive and now finds himself stranded and alone on the hostile planet, and with only meagre supplies, he must draw upon his ingenuity, wit and spirit to survive and find a way to not only signal to Earth that he is alive, but to get home. Director Ridley Scott has returned to the genre that established him as one of the cinemas most gifted filmmakers with "Alien" and "Blade Runner," but don't expect any fierce creatures or killer androids in "The Martian." Visually breathtaking and perfectly blended with well balanced moments of tension, humour and excitement, but anchored firmly in realism, star Matt Damon gives one of the best performances of an already extraordinary career as the stranded "Robinson Crusoe" on Mars. Director Ridley Scott is at his best here, he has created a simply structured adventure with a respectfully streamlined narrative that is a boldly beautiful cosmic adventure, and ultimately a spellbinding entertainment experience!

FILM: LEGEND: Genre: Crime/Drama.

Cast: Tom Hardy, Tom Hardy, Christopher Eccleston, Taron Egerton.

Details: 2015/MA15+/132 Minutes.

Stars: *** Verdict: Tom Hardy gives two magnetic performances as identical twin gangsters Reggie and Ronnie Kray, two of the most notorious criminals in British history, and their organised crime empire in the East End of London during the 1960s. Rich in period detail and production design, fine supporting performances and smoothly paced, it 's major flaw is that it is sadly underwritten, failing to deliver any real tension, grittiness, fear or searing impact that numerous other British gangster films have excelled in including 'Get Carter' (1971), 'Villain' (1971), 'The Long Good Friday' (1980), 'Sexy Beast' (2000) and the original 'Brighton Rock' (1947), to name a few. Their story was filmed previously in 1990 in the equally flawed 'The Krays' starring popular 'Spandau Ballet' brothers Gary and Martin Kemp as Ronald and Reggie Kray. Nonetheless, 'Legend' never tires and there is plenty to enjoy, and does prove that crime can pay, though not quite as much as it should have here.

FILM: VON RYAN'S EXPRESS: Genre: Action/War/Adventure.

Cast: Frank Sinatra, Trevor Howard, Adolfo Celi, Brad Dexter, Edward Mulhare.

Details: 1965/ PG/117 Minutes.

Stars: **** Verdict: Rip roaring popcorn WWII boys-own-adventure ride of captured American POW Colonel who, following a mass escape, then recapture, hijack the German train the prisoners are being transported in and head across country to Switzerland, with the Germans right on their tale all the way. Veteran director Mark Robson has created a superbly crafted adventure filled with well balanced action, thrills, humour and excitement, along with elaborate footage of real trains (with some miniature work) in authentic Italian settings keeps it firmly on the rails. Stars Frank Sinatra and Trevor Howard are in top form, as are veteran visual effects artist L.B. Abbott and composer Jerry Goldsmith. It all comes together to guarantee that this is a ride you are likely never to forget!

Beautifully remastered for DVD and Blu-ray the image and audio are sharp, crisp and clean, and features a host of Special Features that includes: Reliving the Adventure of Von Ryan's Express Featurette.

Hollywood and Its War Films Featurette.

The Music of Von Ryan's Express Featurette.

Bringing Movies to Life: The Legacy of Jerry Goldsmith Featurette.

Original Theatrical Trailer, TV Spots and Still Gallery.

■ (MA). 121 minutes. Available now on DVD and Blu-Ray. Despite its distressing subject matter and bleak world viewpoint, Sicario is the kind of film people should embrace.

At a time when Hollywood is obsessed with super-hero franchises and sub-par remakes, the new film from Denis Villeneuve (Prisoners / Incendies) was a definite breath of fresh air, and its success at the boxoffice showed just how many serious movie goers out there wanted something challenging and thought-provoking.

Emily Blunt stars as Kate Macer, a relatively new FBI agent who has quickly made a name for herself working in the department's kidnapping division.

When a possible hostage situation turns into something much more disturbing, she draws the attention of Matt (Josh Brolin), who heads a special government task force that are trying to fight the war on drugs in Mexico.

Macer volunteers to join the secretive group, who also have at their disposal the mysterious Alejandro (Benicio Del Toro), but she will soon realise that this particular war has blurred lines both legal and moral, exposing a world that has lost any kind of faith and hope in human nature.

Sicario is that rare breed of film, working not only as a spine-tingling thriller, but also an intelligent dissection of a problem that is affecting millions of people, especially those families trying to exist in poverty-stricken communities.

Director Villeneuve and screenwriter Taylor Sheridan show with utter conviction how monstrous and immense the drug trade is, and how far off the lawful path authorities feel they have to go to try and make any kind of impact.

But this cancerous, blackened world created by this violent, growingly amoral conflict is sadly engulfing everything around us, and while society works in a greedy, vicious circle, this industry will continue to flourish.

Performances are outstanding, but special mention must be given to Blunt and Del Toro.

In a world devoid of humanity, these two gifted actors make sure audiences have someone to connect with and hang on to as they are taken on such a dark and dangerous journey.

The always reliable Josh Brolin also offers strong work.

Technically Sicario is flawless, and through exceptional editing (Joe Walker), scoring (Johann Johannson), cinematography (Oscarwinning Roger Deakins), and sound design, ensures this is an immersive, enveloping experience, one that needs to be admired and applauded.

Like Prisoners, this has been unfairly ignored at Oscar time, with only three nominations (Sound Mixing, Cinematography, Original Score).

RATING - ****.

● Philippe Petit (Joseph Gordon Levitt) makes history in the dazzling and highly entertaining drama The Walk. passion. Who better then to present his most famous accomplishment than Robert Zemeckis, another great showman who definitely loves what he does with great energy and ability.

Narrated by Petit (Joseph Gordon-Levitt), we see how he became enamoured with the art of high-wire walking, and the moment where he first came across the soon-to-be-completed Twin Towers.

The rest of the film deals with how this obsessive individual managed to carry out his insane task.

Zemeckis seems more interested in bringing to life the joy Petit has for his craft, and how that joy drove him to concoct bigger and more dangerous high-wire challenges.

On this level, Zemeckis succeeds very well, and this buoyancy keeps proceedings fun and fast-paced.

This approach means means however that any further character development is pushed to the side, and as such everyone, especially those surrounding Petit, feel somewhat underdeveloped. Gordon-Levitt (The Lookout / The Dark Knight Rises) is excellent, conveying Petit's energy and passion with utter conviction, and Ben Kingsley is wonderful as Petit's Czech mentor, Papa Rudy.

The CGI re-creation of the World Trade Centre buildings is astounding and completely believable, and you have to keep reminding yourself that these structures no longer exist.

The walk itself? Zemeckis pulls out all the stops here, and what we witness here is truly astonishing.

If you missed the film in 3D (and IMAX), you deprived yourself of a truly immersive big-screen experience.

You actually felt that you were 110 storeys above the ground, and you were with Petit during his hair-raising, heart-stopping walk.

Zemeckis and his technical crew deserve immense praise for their incredible work, and it is ridiculous that this hasn't been nominated for a slew of technical awards at this year's Oscars (really, not even for Visual Ef(PG). 123 minutes. Available on fects). I guess it shows just how conDVD and Blu-Ray on February 18. vincing this walk is.

Philippe Petit is a great showman RATING - ***½. who loves what he does with great - Aaron Rourke

The Walk

Top 10 Lists THE AUSTRALIAN BOX OFFICE TOP TEN: 1. DIRTY GRANDPA. 2. THE REVENANT. 3. ZOOLANDER 2.

4. SPOTLIGHT. 5. STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS. 6. THE HATEFUL EIGHT. 7. THE CHOICE. 8. THE BIG SHORT. 9. THE 5TH WAVE. 10. SISTERS. NEW RELEASES AND COMING SOON TO CINEMAS AROUND AUSTRALIA: FEBRUARY 11: BROOKLYN, DEADPOOL, ZOOLANDER 2.

FEBRUARY 18: 45 YEARS, CONCUSSION, HOW TO BE SINGLE, RIDE ALONG 2, RISEN, TRUMBO. THE DVD AND BLU-RAY TOP RENTALS & SALES: 1. THE MARTIAN [Sci-Fi/Adventure/Drama/Matt Damon, Jessica Chastain].

2. LEGEND [Drama/Thriller/Tom Hardy, Christopher Eccleston].

3. THE INTERN [Comedy/Robert De Niro, Anne Hathaway, Rene Russo].

4. SICARIO [Crime/Drama/Emily Blunt, Benicio Del Toro, Josh Brolin].

5. MACBETH [Drama/Michael Fassbender, Marion Cotillard].

6. SHERLOCK: The Abominable Bride [Mystery/Thriller/Benedict Cumberbatch].

7. THE LAST WITCH HUNTER [Action/Adventure/Vin Diesel, Elijah Wood, Rose Leslie].

8. EVEREST [Adventure/Drama/ Jason Clarke, Josh Brolin, Sam Worthington].

9. STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON [Music/Drama/Jason Mitchell, Corey Hawkins, Paul Giamatti].

10. MAZE RUNNER: SCORCH TRIALS [Action/Sci-Fi/Dylan O'Brien, Thomas Brodie-Sangster].

Also: IRRATIONAL MAN, SOUTHPAW, HOLDING THE MAN, MISSION IMPOSSIBLE: ROGUE NATION, SHE'S FUNNY THAT WAY, A WALK IN THE WOODS, ODDBALL, TED 2, ANT-MAN, TRAINWRECK. NEW RELEASE HIGHLIGHTS ON DVD THIS WEEK: THE WALK [Drama/Adventure/Joseph Gordon-Levitt].

BLACK MASS [Thriller/Drama/ Johnny Depp, Joel Edgerton, Benedict Cumberbatch].

QUEEN AND COUNTRY [Drama/ Callum Turner, Caleb Landry Jones, David Thewlis].

MISS YOU ALREADY [Drama/Drew Barrymore, Toni Collette, Dominic Cooper].

NEW RELEASE HIGHLIGHTS ON BLURAY THIS WEEK: THE WALK [Drama/Adventure/Joseph Gordon-Levitt].

THE WALK 3D + Blu-Ray [Drama/ Adventure/Joseph Gordon-Levitt].

BLACK MASS [Thriller/Drama/ Johnny Depp, Joel Edgerton, Benedict Cumberbatch].

MISS YOU ALREADY [Drama/Drew Barrymore, Toni Collette, Dominic Cooper].

CHICAGO FIRE: Season 3.

NEW RELEASE AND RE-RELEASE CLASSICS ON DVD THIS WEEK: None Listed for This Week.

Turn To Page 37

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 31

Observer Showbiz

Local Theatre With Cheryl Threadgold

‘Bette and Joan’ at Brighton Spring Awakening

● Robbie Medica (Melchior) and Kiane O’Farrel (Wendle) in Spring Awakening at the Doncaster Playhouse.

Photo: Ben Fon ■ PEP Productions presents the musical Spring Awakening from February 25 to March 5 at the Doncaster Playhouse.

Spring Awakening is based on Frank Wedekind’s controversial play, once banned in Germany, with book and lyrics

by Steven Sater, and rock score by Duncan Sheik.

Set in 1891, the story tells of grown-ups holding all the cards. Headstrong Melchior and naive Wendla stumble into each other’s arms, passionate and curious, while anxious Moritz struggles to live up to the stringent expectations of society.

With only each other for guidance, this group of young men and women travel the fraught and rocky path of adolescence, discovering their bodies, their minds, and themselves along the way.

A vibrant celebration of youth and rebellion, Spring Awakening fuses issues of morality, sexuality, and rock and roll into a story that packs a powerful emotional punch.

Performance Season: February 25 – March 5 Venue: Doncaster Playhouse, 679 Doncaster Rd., Doncaster Tickets: $30/$27 Bookings: www.trybooking.com/JUBX or 0418 549 187.

HONORARY REVIEWERS ■ We gratefully acknowledge the volunteer work of the team of Melbourne Observer theatre reviewers, under the leadership of Cheryl Threadgold.

The reviewers volunteer their time in attending the non-professional shows, writing the reviews, as well as paying their own transportation costs, in order to foster and encourage local theatre in Victoria.

Our team includes: Rita Crispin, Martin Curtis, Barbara Hughes, Kathryn Keeble, Beth Klein, Lyn Laister, Stephen Leeden, Deborah Marinaro, Graeme McCoubrie, Catherine McGregor, David McLean, Maggie Morrison, Jill Pageand Elizabeth Semmel.

- Editor

Melbourne

Observer SNOWANGEL

SHOWS ■ Brighton Theatre Company: Bette and Joan (by Anton Burge) February 18 - March 5 at the Brighton Cultural Centre, Cnr Wilson and Carpenter Sts., Brighton. Director: Alan Burrows. Bookings: 1300 752 126.

■ Peridot Theatre: Two and Two Together (by Derek Benfield) Until February 20 at 8.00pm, February 13 at 2.15pm, February 14 at 4.00pm at the Unicorn Theatre, Mt Waverley Secondary College, Lechte Rd., Mt Waverley. Director: Cheryl Richards.

Bookings: 9808 0770 or 1300 138 645 or email tickets@peridot.com.au ■ Gemco Players: Canterbury Tales February 19 - 27 at 19 Kilvington Drive, Emerald. Director: Ross Housham. Bookings: www.gemcoplayers.org ■ Heidelberg Theatre Company: Moonlight and Magnolias (by Ron Hutchinson) February 19 - March 5 at 36 Turnham Ave., Rosanna. Director: Bruce Akers. Bookings: 9457 4117 www.htc.org.au ■ The Basin Theatre Group: Two One Act Plays: Snowangel (by Lewis John Carlino) Director: John Putman and My Brilliant Divorce (by Geraldine Aron) February 19 - March 12 at The Basin Theatre, Doongalla Rd., The Basin. Director: Dru Bartlett.

Bookings: 1300 784 668 (7-9pm only).

■ The 1812 Theatre: Allo! Allo! February 25 - March 19 at The 1812 Theatre, 3-5 Rose St., Upper Ferntree Gully. Director: Dexter Bourke. Bookings: 9758 3964.

■ The Mount Players: The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie (by Jay Presson Allan) February 26 - March 13 at The Mountview Theatre, 56 Smith St., Macedon. Director: Andrew Meldrum. Bookings: 5426 1892.

■ Malvern Theatre Company: Cash on Delivery (by Michael Cooney) Until March 12 at Malvern Theatre, 29 Burke Rd., Malvern East. Director: Ewen Crockett. Bookings: 1300 131 552.

■ Altona City Theatre: Alice in Wonderland Until March 19 at 115 Civic Pde., Altona. All tickets $7.00. Bookings: 0425 705 550 www.altonacitytheatre.com.au ■ Williamstown Little Theatre: Sweet Road (by Debra Oswald) Until February 27 at 2-4 Albert St., Williamstown. Director: Peter Newling. Tickets: $25/$22. Bookings: 9885 9678.

■ Eltham Little Theatre: The Ten Minute Quickie Short Play Competition (by various writers) March 2 - 5 at the Eltham Performing Arts Centre, 1603 Main Rd., Research. Producer: Paula Armstrong. Bookings: 0411 713 095.

■ Lilydale Athenaeum Theatre: The Vicar of Dibley (by Ian Gower and Paul Carpenter, adapted from the original TV series

by Richard Curtis and Paul Mayhew-Archer) March 2 - 19 at 3941 Castella St., Lilydale. Director: Loretta Bishop. Bookings: 9735 1777.

■ Strathmore Theatrical Arts Group (STAG): Killing Jeremy (by Bridgette Burton) March 3 - 5, 10 - 12 at 8.00pm; March 6 and 13 at 2pm at the Strathmore Community Theatre, Cnr Loeman and Napier Streets, Strathmore. Tickets: $20/$15. Bookings: 9382 6284.

■ Beaumaris Theatre: Grease March 4 -19 at 82 Wels Rd., Beaumaris. Director; Debbie Keyt; Musical Director: Rhonda Vaughan; Choreographer: Camilla Klesman. Bookings: www.beaumaristheatre.com ■ Shepparton Theatre Arts Group:Dookie (by John Head) March 18 - 19 at the Dookie Memorial Hall, Mary St., Dookie.

Bookings: 5832 9511.

AUDITIONS ■ Peridot Theatre: A Suitcase Unclaimed (by Chris Hodson), February 10 at 7.00pm at the Unicorn Theatre, Mt Waverley Secondary College, Lechte Rd., Mt Waverley. Director: Lisa McNiven. Audition bookings: 0410 567 834.

■ Peoples Playhouse: Annie February 19 -21 at Logan St., Frankston. Enquiries: 0402 197 390.

■ Heidelberg Theatre Company: Twelve Angry Men (by Reginald Rose) February 21 at 6.00pm and February 22 at 7.30pm at 36 Turnham Avenue, Rosanna. Director: Chris Baldock.

Enquiries: chris.baldock@gmail.com ■ Wyndham Theatre Company: Legally Blonde Jr February 22 - 24 at 2 Synnot St., Werribee. (Casting for ages 13 - 18)Codirectors: Dylan Mazurek and Krystal Holzer, Choreographer: Xavier McGettigan, Musical Director:Thomas Bradford. Audition enquiries: www.legallyblondejr.com/auditions ■ Mooroolbark Theatre Group: Steel Magnolias (by Robert Harling) February 25 at 7.00pm at Red Earth Theatre, Mooroolbark Community Centre. Director: Val Campbell-Hurst.

Enquiries: 0424 007 112.

■ Peridot Theatre: Ancient Lights (by Shelagh Stephenson) March 6 at 2.00pm at the Unicorn Theatre, Mt Waverley Secondary College, lechte Rd., Mt Waverley. Director: Bruce Cochrane. Enquiries: 0423 347 960.

■ Lilydale Athenaeum Theatre: Breaker Morant (by Kenneth G Ross) March 6 at 7.00pm, March 7, 8 at 7.30pm at The Lilydale Athenaeum Theatre, Castella St., Lilydale. Director: Alan Burrows. Enquiries: 0412 077 761 or www.lilydaleatc.com

● Susan Carty (Connie) in Snowangel.

■ The Basin Theatre Group presents two One Act Plays from February 19 to March 12 at The Basin Theatre, Doongalla Rd, The Basin.

Snowangel by Lewis John Carlino and directed by John Putman, tells of John, tormented by the memories of a past love, visiting Connie a prostitute to get her to re-enact certain scenes that have been etched on his mind.

My Brilliant Divorce is written by Geraldine Aron and directed by Dru Bartlett. Middle-aged and recently divorced, Angela considers her past married life and what now lies ahead.

Performance Season: February 19-March 12 Venue: The Basin Theatre, Doongalla Rd., The Basin Bookings: www.thebasintheatre.org.au 1300 784 668.

REVIEW: COUCH POTATO ■ Western Independent Theatre’s 2016 season opens with Hayley Lawson- Smith’s Couch Potato in the versatile and unique space of the Bluestone Church Arts Space, Footscray.

As a full play it exposes the very ordinary life of Robert (Mark Salvestro) still living in the family home years after his parent’s death.

The house has not changed and his routine is regimented until one day after arriving home from work there is a girl (Jessica Lawrence) asleep on the couch.

How did she get there? What is he do? His older sister Lisa (Jennifer Piper) wants him to find a girlfriend while his best mate Lorrie (Luke Styles) just wants him to get laid.

The first half takes us through his turmoil of what to do.

Do I wake her, while his best mate arrives to say that this is his chance.

When his sister arrives, Robert tries to hide the girl he has called Scarlet with a blanket but unsuccessfully with Lisa being excited and happy for him, thinking he may have finally made it.

However it doesn’t really follow as the story becomes convoluted as to who she is and how she got there and if there was any relationship between them.

She says nothing, never acknowledging Robert’s questioning and statements and while he is at work she awakes and before returning to the couch. changes the drab curtains and furniture fittings - very cleverly devised by set designers Jenifer Piper and Belinda Campbell Salvestro and Piper were strong together and gave a great portrayal, while Styles was a little soft, particularly in the second half in his dialogue with Piper, which revealed some intimate details of Lorrieand Lisa’s recent relationship..

However, the ending left us wondering what would have happened next, with Robert being very comfortable in having the silent ‘Scarlet’ in his house.

Without a word being spoken, the girl awakes and rises above the couch with Robert transfixed as their eyes met for the first time. Blackout.

Dates: February 18-21 and February 25 -27 Time: 8pm nightly and 1pm Sunday Cost: $28 and $32 Venue: Bluestone Church Arts Space, 10A Hyde Street Footscray Bookings: www.witinc.com.au - Review by Graeme McCoubrie

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Page g 32 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, y y February 17, 2016 Melbourne

Observer

Lovatts Crossword No 7 Across

1. Portion 5. Appliance, ... cleaner 8. Gluttony 11. Coloured-tile design 14. Nit-picker 18. On the sick list 19. The U of IOU 20. Zigzag pattern 23. Chef's garment 24. Scandalous 27. Entice 28. Beeped (horn) 29. Debates 31. Fuzzy leather 32. Crush (fly) 34. Roof edges 36. Fantasise 37. Not even once 38. Toddlers 39. More unfriendly 41. Ardent 44. Certainly 47. Dance 49. Equally balanced 50. Gazed fixedly 52. Bill 54. Recess 56. Restaurant list 58. Throw out of house 60. Most awful 62. Young dogs 64. Rain heavily 66. Egyptian snakes 67. Avoided 70. Measuring rod 71. In control, at the ...

72. Singing voices 73. Finished 74. Cupid's shaft 75. Climbing vegetable 77. Armoured vehicle 79. Dominate (market) 83. Pummelled 85. Unusually 87. Exhaust (supply) 89. Wandering 91. Gratifying 94. Stressed 97. Declare 98. Scenes 99. Questionable 100. Court fine 103. Column 105. Custodian 107. General pardon 110. Pork cut, ... ribs 111. Relaxes 114. Renovate (ship) 116. Frosty 118. Exclusive 120. Expressing contempt 122. Hue 124. Screen collie 126. Vibrated noisily 129. Divides 132. Castle entrance 136. Borders 139. Falsify 140. Quantity of paper 142. Fracas 145. Edit (text) 146. Splendid sight 148. Halt 150. Chopped down 152. Outlook 154. Remain

Across 156. Ticket remnant 157. Become septic 159. Hand-make (jumper) 161. Eiffel Tower city 164. Surplus 167. Essential 169. Slightest 171. Canoodle 173. Happen 174. Periodic 177. Socially excluded 180. Anglican parish priest 183. In an unspecified way 187. Leaps over 190. Pencil rubber 192. Constant 194. Book publicity hype196. Ever 197. Of the sun 198. Musical pace 200. Peace offering, ... branch 201. Male sibling 203. Root vegetable 205. Sport, Rugby ...

207. Willingly 209. Drain 211. Improper 213. Undergarment 215. Powered bike 217. Ambience 220. Portable light 222. Lockjaw 224. Nobleman 227. Recognition 228. Welcoming 232. Kitchen flooring 234. Circuit-breaker 237. Leather strap 239. Golf club 240. Goodbye 241. Warm & cosy 242. Port style 244. Considering 245. Small religious group 247. Booming 250. Stimulates 251. Adversary 252. Type of bee 253. Depart 255. Packing boxes 257. Shattered 260. Skin eruptions 264. Comfort 266. Affixed with spikes 267. Judas' payment, ... pieces of silver 270. Astonish 273. Principles 274. Jetty 275. Craze 277. Not drunk 279. Treadle 281. Seethe 283. In force (of license) 285. Ledger entry 286. Annul 287. Dreary 290. Dries up 291. Follow 292. Salad dressing 293. Mongrel 294. Pose for artist 295. Loathes 296. Paper hanky 297. Sloop or ketch 298. Ice-cream dessert 299. Topic

Down

Down

1. Covering for feet 2. Pained expression 3. Orient 4. Duration of presidency 5. Long narrow prospect 6. Greatest 7. Glove 8. Cheer 9. Ghostly 10. Charismatic 11. Assaulted & robbed 12. Tranquil 13. Bring about 14. Price of passage 15. Aromatic herb 16. Advocate 17. Walrus teeth 21. Body's building blocks 22. Phantom Of The ...

25. Engine booster 26. Befuddle 28. Gently 30. Calming drug 33. Language 35. Compete 38. Toughen (steel) 40. Moral 42. Utter (cry) 43. Location 45. Tidings 46. Wheat tips 48. Guacamole ingredient 49. Furthest limits 51. Dashes 53. Mulish 55. Well-behaved child, little ...

57. Unmoved 59. Relinquish (land) 61. Ready for business 62. Pluto or Earth 63. Suggestion 65. Planned movement 66. * symbol 68. Hard Italian cheese 69. Dentist's tools 76. Likely 78. Much ... About Nothing 80. Fleur-de-lis 81. Jittery 82. Dog, cocker ...

84. Water tank 85. Matures 86. Dozes 88. Wicked 90. Approachable 92. Meeting schedule 93. Diaper 95. Rock or jazz 96. Scope 101. Rainbow shapes 102. Determined individual 103. District 104. Zone 106. Acting sovereign 108. North American deer 109. Prince Edward, ... of Wessex 110. Sluggish 112. TV studio filming area 113. Feminine pronoun 115. Excursion 117. Secretes 119. Pine or palm 121. Notion 123. Unnerve 124. Beach rescuer 125. Caustic 127. Docile 128. High hits 130. The same 131. Cheek whiskers 133. Wonderment 134. Nags 135. Grass colour 137. Deadly poison 138. Fury

141. Keenly perceptive 143. Raise (children) 144. Belonging to whom?

147. Hopeless wish, ... in the sky 149. Mountains 151. Labours 153. Is able to 155. Lovable 157. Room base 158. Bladder 160. Decorate with pictures 162. Tiny particle 163. Creep (towards) 165. Beast of burden 166. Here ..., gone tomorrow 168. French brandy 170. Additionally 172. Loose hood 175. Hanker after 176. Hatchets 178. Slothful 179. Dodge 181. Plant seed 182. Written material 184. Elect 185. Deciduous tree 186. Woodwind instrument 188. Second-hand 189. Suit-maker 191. Regal 193. Speaking to crowd 195. Fixed procedure 196. Ward off 199. Copious 202. Legacy 204. Traitor 206. Female relative 208. Hunger 209. Wound mark 210. Bombard 212. Residences 213. Beat up 214. Current units 215. Interim 216. Camera stand 218. Arm joints 219. Each person 221. Sped on foot 223. Flightless bird 225. Bore diameter 226. On fire 229. Lungs & liver 230. Plagiarised 231. Home (duties) 233. Single thing 235. Acidic 236. Civilian wartime prisoner 238. Honey drink 243. Heavenly spirits 245. Half 246. Blister-like pouch 248. Gambling chances 249. Extinct bird 254. Inaccurate 255. Free from blame 256. Allow in 258. Enigma 259. Serious-minded 261. State further 262. Undulating 263. Four-door car 265. Straddling 268. Pester 269. Minimise 271. Hosiery garment 272. Improvement (in economy) 274. Beg 276. Skilled 278. Fundamental 280. Die down 282. Flour cereal 283. Promises 284. Schoolboys 288. Geological eras 289. Handle

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 33

Solution on Page 26

MEGA CROSSWORD No 7 1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

18 20

21

34

39

42

65

71

81

91

92

101

77

116

117

118

132

133

134

146

112

127

113

142

148

114

158

159

167

122

123 129

143

137

130

181

175

161

145

150

169

151

163

170

152

153

171

165

191

192

184

185

173

198 203

209

210

211

195

199

204

188

200

205

206

207

212

213

208

214

217 220

224

225

221

226 232

228

233

234

239 245

255

246

247

257 267

274

275 283

268

258

270 277

285

248

242

249

243

250

260 271

278

261

263

280 287

281 288

292 294

297

298

264

265

273

279

291 293

262

272

286

290

296

230

236

259

269

276

284

219

252

256

266

229

241

251 254

235

240

244

218

223

227 231

238

222

189

196

216

237

179 187

194

197 202

178

186

193

166

172 177

183

190

156

164

176

182

201

162

131

138

144

149

160

168 174

295

109

155 157

253

108

115

121

154

215

96

128

141

147

95

107

136

140

86

106

135

139

180

85

90

105

120

126

69

99

119

125

68

78

89

111

57

74

84

104

110

56

67

98 103

48

55

94

102

26

73

88

97

124

47

93

100

17

61

83

87

16

38

66

76

82

25

46

72 75

15

31

54 60

64

80

45

53

59

63

79

44

52 58

14

37

43

51

70

30

36

41

50

62

24 29

35

40

49

13

23 28

33

12

19

22

27 32

11

299

289

282

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Page 34 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

MELBOURNE OBSERVER HONOUR BOARD PUBLISHERS

1969-1971: Gordon Page Barton 1971-1977: Maxwell Newton 1977-1989: Peter Stuart Isaacson 1999, 2002-onwards: Ash and Fleur Long

PATRONS

ObserverTHON Pacakage - July 2015 $10,000 - 100 Full-page colour ads (in any 100 issues, starting immediately, space permitting)

HONORARY WRITERS

All Melbourne Observer editorial contributors do so on an honorary basis Len Baker (Harness Racing) Matt Bissett-Johnson (Cartoonist) David Ellis (Travel, Wine) Rob Foenander (Country Music) Kyle Galley (Greyhound Racing) Julie Houghton (Arts) Yvonne Lawrence (‘Life and Style’) Nick Le Souef (Outback Legend) Mike McColl Jones (Top 5) Greg Newman (Radio, On This Day) Aaron Rourke (Movies, DVDs) Ted Ryan (Thoroughbred Horses) James Sherlock (Movies, DVDs) Cheryl Threadgold (Local Theatre) Kevin Trask (Showbiz) Gary Wild, Slickpix (Photographer) Gavin Wood (West Hollywood)

HONORARY REVIEWERS

All Melbourne Observer theatre reviewers do so on an honorary basis Rita Crispin Martin Curtis Barbara Hughes Kathryn Keeble Beth Klein Lyn Laister Stephen Leeden Deborah Marinaro Graeme McCoubrie Catherine McGregor David McLean Maggie Morrison Jill Page Elizabeth Semmel.

GOLD FRIENDS

Substantial Supporters Gregory J. Long Ron Bourke (NRG Sunbury FM) Gabrielle Forman John Gilmour and Family Alex Hehr (Golden Days Radio) Gigi Hellmuth Alex Hutchinson Larry James (Golden Days Radio) Bobby Johnson Jim Lee Jessie Lynch Angela McGowan Judy and Bob Phillips (RPP FM) David Purcell Denis Scanlan (Pulse FM) Michael J Wilkie

OBSERVER FRIENDS Contributions of $10, $20 or $50 Don Crawford Julie Houghton Craig Huggins Ben Quick Libby Ross Kevin White

STRATEGIC P ARTNERS All Day Distribution Newsagencoes of Victoria Streamline Press

GOLD A DVERTISERS ‘ObserverTHON Pacakage - July 2015 Gold Advertiser’ spots available for $4500 45 Full-page colour ads (in any 45 issues of 2015 or 2016, space permitting) ‘Every Week’Advertisers 84 The Spit Apartments Airlok Car Cave Ambler Adelaide Hills Animals On The Move Aradale Ghost Tours Art With Distinction Aussie Resort Australian By Design Australian Getaway Tours Autosol Bandicoot Brewing Beach Street Apartments Boyd Dance Academy Camberwell Sewing Centre City Golf Club The Clothes Barn Comfort Inn and Suites Mari Court The Convenient Kitchen Coolum Baywatch Resort Coolum Seaside Apartments Cupcakes Delivered Darwin's Barra Base Diamond Cove Resort DirecFresh / NicenFresh Echo 4x4 Campers Elysium Holiday Apartments Finders Keypers Fitzroy Island Resort Fitzroy Readers Formplex Gilmours Comfort Shoes Golden Days Radio Grosvenor In Cairns GutzBusta Health And Mobility Hygeia Ivanhoe Grammar School Ivanhoe Cycles JJ's Photography Logic eCigs Lone Pine Fencing Marrakesh Apartments Mattresses Galore Metro Cinemas Boronia Mike's Carpet Discounters New Age Caravans Ovenu Pacific Regis The Pavilions Port Douglas Pemberley Equestrian Penta Block Print Depot Professional Quilting Service Providence Lodge Reliable Hot Water Rich Glen Olive Oil Ritter Australia Rosenow Industries Royal Melbourne Philharmonic Royal Sleep Saffron Grove San Remo Ballroom Sandy Shores On Golden Beach Sapphire City Motor Inn SCWL (Subliminal CDs) Sedona Estate SGI Aged Care Shady Characters Sholley Trolley Shop Inside SLR Caravans St John of God (Frankston Rehab. Hospital) Start Fresh Finance Swaggers Motor Inn Tilco Engineering Tribute Funeral Services Tri State Safaris USA to Aus.com Vineyard Cottages The Waterford Prestige Apartments Wheels of America Windward Passage Apartments K & J Woolley Master Plumbers

CONTRIBUTING MAIL SUBSCRIBERS

‘ObserverTHON Package - July 2015 Melbourne Observer Mail Subscriptions (Copy, posted each issue, anywhere in Aust.) $99 - 15 issues $198 - 30 issues $297 - 45 issues RonAlderton, Hazel Anderson, Ian Armstrong, Barry Atkinson, Flo and Alan Axford, Barrie Bartlett, Shirley Bartlett, B. Bernal, Brian Bowman, Jane Brzozek, Steven Burch, Pat Burke, Elsie Butterworth, Jan Carter, Julie Cavanagh, Rita Cervai, Leonie Charlesworth, Ron Cocks, Muriel Cooper, P. Anne County, H,A. Cowan, Margaret Cragg, E. Cusack, J. Cutler, Russell Dalton, F. Davin, Don Davy, Joan De Ross, Geraldine Delaharpe, Judith Dix, Gretas Donaldson, Anthony Drayton, Bill Duff, B.M. Dunn, Joyce Durrant, Robert Eagles, Betty Edwards, Doris Eggleton, P. Fitzgibbon, Sylvia Gouldthorp, M. Grant, Maureen Gregan, J. Hardiman, Anthony Healey, Kenneth Henderson, Biran Hickey, Nancy Hill, Rene Hinton, Peter Hitchener, Shirley Holt, Julie Houghton, Craig Huggins, Alex Hutchinson, Larry James, Norma James, M.H. Johnson, Bobby Johnson, Ann Jones, Beryl Jones, Chris Keating, Olga Kenny, Brian Kirby, R.W. Kirtley, Wendy Langridge, Steve Lawrence, Jackie Lewis, Keith Livingston, Sid Mann, Bruce McLean, Angela McGowan, Media Monitors, D. Neubecker, Eileen Norton, Howard Purcell, Graeme Rodda, Brian Rule, Kath Rutledge, Pat Shelton-Astley, Raymond Smith, Allan Spencer, E. Spilsbury, Michelle Stamper, Natahsa Stipanov, Kate Swifte, David Syme, Diana Szaley, F.L. Taylor, Gary Turner, Frank Van Straten, Andrew Wailes, Dayle Walker, Cecily Waters, Fay Waugh, Dan Webb, Steve Weston, Patricia Wheller, J. Whitehouse, Beryl Whitton.

SOCIAL M EDIA FAMILY

Join our daily conversations on Facebook: Ash Long’. Free.

Harry Adlerstein, Nicholas Aitken, Roy Alderton, Merryn Aldous, Steve Ahern, Annette Allison, Kathleen Amarant, David Anderson, Matthew Anderson, Tom Andronas, Heidi Arena, David Argue, Bill Armnstrong, Ash Arthur, Robert Ashworth, José Auditore, Don Baker, Tony Barber, Heather Barry, Gary Bartholomew, Alan Baskin, Prue Bassett, Liza Bateman, Andrew Baudinette, Glenn Bear, Steve Bedwell, Brad Beitzel, Ian Bell, Hillel Benedykt, Craig Bennett, Jayne Bennett, Ray Belcher, Phillip Bennett, Rachel Berger, Wayne Binfield, Tara Bishop, Jason Blackman, Robert Boileau, Michael Bonaddio, Jeffrey Bounds, Latika Bourke, Rod Boyd, Bruce Bradfield, Lucy Bright, Cheryl Brown, Geoff Brown, Jenchurai Brown, Ashley Browne, Barry Browne, Kristi Bryant, Paul Bryant, Rob Buckingham,Adam Burrage, Jeff Buzza, Fiona Byrne, Peter Byrne, John Cantrill, Megan Castran, Julie Cavanagh, Angela Ceberano, Chrsitina Chia, Marylyn Christie, Stacey Christopoulos-Fakhry, Gerry Connolly, Michael Conway, Lynne Cook, Debra Cooper, Muriel Cooper, Matthew Corbett, Shawn Cosgrove, Pete Coulon, Don Crawford, Barry Creyton, Wes Crook, Steve Curtis, Gerard Daffy, Donna De La Rue, Matthew Deller, Donna Demaio, Luke Dennehy, Victoria Dinic, Judith Dix, Greta Donaldson, George Donikian, Chez Donoghue, Virginia Dowser, Coral Drouyn, Leigh Drew, Dee Dee Dunleavy, Issi Dye, Merv Dyer, Helen Eastwood, Les Egglestone, Rob Elliott, Tom Elliott, Lisa Engelander, Jackie Epstein, Nick Erby, Jenny Evans, Peter Fearn, Tony Featherstone, Dean Felton, Caroline Ferguson, Gene Bradley Fisk, Ridha Fkih,Alan Fletcher, Rob Foenander, David Font, Des Ford, John Foreman, Virginia Megan Freeman-Sumarac, Steve Frew, Simon Gallagher, Toni Giannarelli, Mark Gillies, Mark Gogoll, Doug Golden, Maurice Golden, Peter zGordon, Libbi Gorr, Lachlan Gould, Bruce Gow, Deborah Jane Gray, Mya G. Grayly, Emily Greenaway, Peter Greenaway, Sal Grimshaw, Haydn Gregson, Natalie Grosby, Anthony Hadj, André

SOCIAL M EDIA FAMILY Continued from previous column Haermeyer, Claire Halliday, Kate Halliday, Fiona Hamilton, Jennifer Hansen, Rod Hardy, Wendy Hargreaves, Barbara Harper, Carolyn Hartmann, John Hay-Mackenzie, Brett Hayhoe, Anthony Healey, Tanya Healey, Jacqueline Healy, Lissi Heffernan,Alex Hehr, Gigi Hellmuth, Meg Heres, Chris Herrod, Matt Hetherington, Melissa Hetherington, Colleen Hewett, Victor Hiah, Glenn Hodges, Shannon Holloway, JaneHolmes, Julie Houghton, Gavin Howard, Andrew Howarth, Frank Howson, John-Michael Howson, Craig Huggins, Alex Hutchinson, Chris Ilsley, Judith Ann Jacques, Neil James, Ross James, Harry Jenkins, Mark Jenkins, Loretta Johns, Cheryle Johnson, Bob Jones, Marcie Jones, Jeff Joseph, Cris Jubb, Helen Kapalos, Warren Kay, Sandy Kaye, Frank Kendall, Jane Kennedy, Chris Keating, Julie Kiriacoudis, Robert Kirwan, Peter Klages, Mark Knight, Imren Kuyucu, Michael Lallo, Yvonne Lawrence, Nathan Lay, Nick Le Souef, Jim Lee, Alison Lee-Tet, Julie Leeming, Sam Lewin, Adam Long, Anne Long, Daniel Long, Dominique Long, Greg Long, Jaide Long, James Long, Kieran Long, Linda Long, Pat Long, Sarah Long, Neil Longdon, Lucy Loprete, Diane Luxmore, Gary Mac, Joan Mac, Wayne Mac, Helen Macdonald, Lachlan Macdonald, Fiona Mackenzie, Trent Mackenzie, Jan Maher-Martin, Jacki MarconGreen, Benjamin Marks, Jeanette Martin, Chrissy Massingham, David Masson, Ian Maurice, Dana McCauley, Sandra McCurdy, Angela McGowan, Shane McInnes, Jane McLaren, Margaret Mclelland, Sue McPhee, Gary McQuade, Marney McQueen, Ross McSwain, Ric Melbourne, Mike Menner, Maria Mercedes, Peter Mery, Rosie Moffat, Jamie Mollard, Wayne Motton, Kenneth Mulholland, Craig Murchie. Kate Murphy, Mary Murphy, Laura Musial, Kate Neilson, Rick Newbery, Greg Newman, Gary Newton, Spencer Nicholls, Paul Nicholson, Georgina Nickell, Rick Num, Libby Nutbean, Kerry O’Brien, Eddie Olek, Maris O’Sullivan, Simon Owens, Mick Pacholli, Silvie Paladino, David Palmer, Andrew Pante, John Parker, Simon Parris. John Pasquarelli, Bill Passick, Dawn Patterson, Marcus Paul, Allan Pennant, Penni Perrin, Ali Perris, Libby Petrella, Elise Petty, Judy Phillips, Felix Pindato, Angela Pippos, Greta Polonsky, Tony Porter, Gene Price, John Price, Cindy Pritchard, Robert Pullin, Howard Purcell, Joan Purcell, Ben Quick, Jamie Redfern, Helen Relph, Dean Reynolds, Don Reynolds, Mark Richardson. Rob Richardson, Kim Richter.

Christine Ridd, Glenn Ridge, Annie Roberts, Wendy Roberts, Clive Rodda. Di Rolle, Libby Ross, Rena Ross, David Rouch, Norman Rowe, Maria Rowland, Lisa Rudd, Pete Rudder, Lisa Millar Ruggerio. Sally Russell, Chris Ryan, Denis Scanlan, Tom Schouten, Brendan Scott, James Scott, Mark Scott, Adam Shand, Janet Shaw, Jim Shomos, Glenys Sigley, Matthew Sigley, John Silvester, Phil Skeggs, Ruta Skoba, Damian Sleep, Frank Slevin, Deborah May Small, Judy Small, Dennis Smith, Justin Smith, Deb Sorrell, Susan Spagnolo, Ken Sparkes, Maddy Sparks, Jim Spreadborough, Garry Spry, Victoria St John, Michelle Stamper, Artie Stevens, Ian Stewart, Natasha Stipanov, Bruce Stockdale, Richard Stockman, Deb Sukarna, Liz Sullivan, Anne Swinstead, John Tamb, Jason Taylor, Rachel D. Taylor, Nui Te Koha, Phil Teese, Lyndall Tennant, Serge Thomann, Gaylene Thompson, Jenny Thompson. Alan Thorley, Greg Tingle, Ellice Tobin, Kevin Trask, Penny Tregonning, Sue ThrethownJones, James Tulk, Judy Turnbull, Robin Turner, Les Twentyman, Hans Van Bloemendaal, Peter van Hauen, Michelle van Raay, Michael Vaughan, John Vertigan, Heidi Victoria, Steve Vizard, Christian Wagstaff, Mal Walden, Paul Walsh, Zoe Walsh, Geoff Ward, Cecily Waters, Rob Watts, Linda Weber, Nicki Wendt, Paul Weston, Kelvin Weston-Green Christie Whelan-Browne, Marilyn Whitelaw, Michael J Wilkie, Eric Williams, Helen Williams, Lisa Williams, Gavin Wood, Ian Wright, Roni Wildboer, Michelle Zydower.

More names to be added in next issue

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au Melbourne

Observer

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 35

Sport Extra

Upset punters out of pocket ■ Punters were left out of pocket after an embarrassing blunder in the sixth race at Bendigo last Wednesday (February 10).

Terrorizer and Lovely Lizzie crossed the line locked together in the Southern Cross Ten Stake, with the judges awarding the race to Lovely Lizzie by a narrow margin.

Subsequent to the all clear being semaphored on the placings of 1, 6, 2 and 4, Stewards consulted with the judges and reviewed the official photo finish print.

It was then determined that Terrorizer had in fact beaten Lovely Lizzie, meaning the official placings were amended to 6, 1, 2 and 4.

Stewards are allowed to amend the result of an event when the wrong placings have been declared, under Rule 63 of the Rules of Greyhound Racing.

Betting outlets had already began to pay punters dividends on the originally declared placings.

Lovely Lizzie started favourite, and the incident gave many punters a "free kick" in the second leg of the Quadrella and first leg of the Daily Double.

Bettors who had invested on Terrorizer for the win, however, have done their cash cold despite the dog actually passing the post first.

Greyhound Racing Victoria has indciated that an inquiry will be held at a date and time to be fixed to determine how the wrong placings were semaphored.

Paper closes ■ Long-running weekly greyhound

Greyhounds

with Kyle Galley newspaper, National Greyhound Form, is no more.

The paper was published without fanfare for the final time on Wednesday, January 27.

As rumours circulated within the industry regarding the future of the paper, and its parent company, National Greyhound Form Pty Ltd, the Australian Racing Greyhound website carried a report confirming the company has been placed in the hands of administrators.

The NGF company website abruptly disappeared, while phone calls to the head office in Essendon also went unanswered.

As well as concerns for the staff employed by the company, numerous subscribers to the paper, Gold Guide greyhound racebooks and online tipping services could be out of pocket with their paid accounts suspended.

Advertisers with paid contracts for the newspaper, and racing clubs who have sponsorship deals in place with the company may also lose out.

The Australian Racing Greyhound report indicated that Altan

Djenab has been appointed by the Australian Securities and Investments Commission to handle NGF's affairs.

Victoria's greyhound racing newspaper began as Greyhound Weekly, published by David Syme and Co, in 1975.

The Pearson brothers, whose father Bill established the Gold Guide greyhound racebooks decades ago, took over Greyhound Weekly in the mid 1990s, re-branding it as National Greyhound Form.

Sydney's Greyhound Recorder is now the sole weekly publication dedicated to greyhound form guides and news in Australia.

Greyhound Racing Victoria last year called for tenders for its digital form guide service - National Greyhound Form Pty Ltd have not won the tender and time will tell whether GRV will launch into a newspaper style publication in the future as part of an overhaul of its form service to punters.

Statement

■ Greyhound Racing Victoria Chairman, Bernie Carolan, has issued a statement to local industry participants as the code continues to tackle issues relating to animal welfare.

The statement reads: “Greyhound Racing Victoria is currently undertaking a major overhaul of its business and the sport, with a focus on animal welfare first and foremost.

“We are dramatically strengthening our regulatory, investigative and compliance activities with animal welfare as our overriding priority.

“The greyhound industry employs more than 3000 people throughout regional Victoria and most of these people treat their animals well.

“We are cracking down on those who treat their animals badly and we are increasing the investigations and fines for those who don’t follow the rules.

“The maltreatment of animals is absolutely unacceptable.”

The statement was released the same day as public gatherings were staged aroundAustralia by those calling for a ban on greyhound racing.

The Greyhound Rescue NSW group staged a rally in Sydney's Hyde Park as part of a nationwide campaign titled "Shut It Down - A National Day ofAction."

As expected, social media carried a great deal of robust discussion from both sides regarding the current state of the greyhound racing industry.

Anti-greyhound groups have also urged their members, and the public, to lobby Melbourne radio station Nova, which employs former star footballer, and greyhound fan Jonathan Brown on its breakfast program.

Cup Carnival

■ The Meadows kicks off another big Australian Cup Carnival this Saturday night, February 20.

Feature races for week one of the Carnival include the Group One Temlee, Rookie Rebel and Zoom Top races.

Final fields for the three events were announced, and are as follows (not in box draw order):

Temlee (525m): Above All, Cash In Motion, Dalgetty, Elfen Bale, Fantastic Spiral, Shared Equity, Unlawful Entry, Zambora Brockie. Reserves: Asa Flying Spur, Fantastic Skye.

Rookie Rebel (600m): Dyna Double One, Grand Intention, Lithgow Panther, Midwinter, Moreira, Norm The Storm, Polijuice Potion, Xtreme Knocka. Reserves: Sisco Rage, Cosmic Owl. Zoom Top (725m): Ada Mary, Bourbski Fever, Come On Fantasy, Lady Toy, Luna Jinx, No Donuts, Seeking Justice, Ryno’s Raider. Reserves: Kilkee Flex, Beks.

80 years

■ Sale Greyhound Racing Club has celebrated 80 years of racing at the Sale Showgrounds.

Upcoming race meetings

■ Upcoming race meetings: Wednesday:The Meadows (Day), Bendigo (Twilight), Cranbourne (Night), Ballarat (N); Thursday: Shepparton (T), Sandown Park (N), Warrnambool (N); Friday: Warrnambool (D), Bendigo (T), Geelong (N); Saturday: Traralgon (T), The Meadows (N); Sunday: Sandown Park (D), Healesville (D), Sale (T); Monday: Ballarat (D), Traralgon (T), Shepparton (N); Tuesday: Geelong (T), Horsham (T).

- Kyle Galley

Page 36 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

www.MelbourneObser ver.com.au

Observer Victorian Sport Melbourne

Racing Briefs

Filling fast

■ My 2016 Harness Jewels Tour is filling fast - if you would like to join me on a whirlwind trip across the Tasman to witness New Zealand's most prestigious and richest event for juveniles, please give me a call (0401 679745) and ask for a flyer.

Vacancies are filling fast. Date : June 3-4-5.

Venue: Cambridge (Waikato Racing) - North Island Cost: Single supplement $1200pp. Double $1000pp

Tuesday at Terang

■ Tuesday trots were at Terang and as usual, the Western District provided winners during the night.

Four year old Village Jasper/Issadora gelding Starwyn Jasper was successful in the Terang Co-Op Pace for C2 & C3 class over 2180 metres.

Driven by Kerryn Manning for Armstrong co-trainers Brooke Hansen and Tim O'Brien, Starwyn Jasper starting from the extreme draw settled at the tail of the field, with polemarker Major Cruiser leading.

Trailing up Westernview Jack three wide in the final circuit, Starwyn Jasper (four wide home turn) finished too well for a game Westernview Jack to prevail by a neck, with Four Starzzz Fella using the sprint lane off the back of the leader 1.2 metres away in third place. The mile rate 1-58.4.

Sad element

■ Heywood trainer Bec East's very smart 4-Y-0 Jeremes Jet/Summer Fairytale entire Hez The One chalked up his 15th victory in 30 outings, when greeting the judge in the Morsbearings Dalvui Dominator (Heat 1) for C1 class over 1680 metres in a rate of 157.2.

With Melton based Alex Ashwood in the sulky, Hez The One enjoyed the run of the race trailing the pole line leader Smoken Pump Action after starting inside the second line.

Using the sprint lane, Hez The One just got there, scoring by a half head over the pacemaker, with Time Thief 4.1 metres back in third place after racing in the open.

It was an all Western District trifecta.

The victory was saddened by the sudden passing of Bec's father Robert on Wednesday - sincere condolences are extended to her.

Led from the pole

■ Hamilton's David Lewis combined with John Caldow to register an easy 7.4 metre victory with 4Y-0 Jeremes Jet/Lewisienna Jo mare Mygirljo in the Goodtime Lodge Pace for C0 class over 1680 metres.

Leading easily from the pole, Mygirljo was never extended, accounting for Macterra Hawk from last and Keayang Rockstar which trailed the winner.

Outstayed rivals

■ Great Western's Kerryn Manning brought up a driving double at Terang after her own charge The Noble Steed, a 7-Y-0 gelded son of Our Sir Vancelot and Quite A Franco snared the $8575 Gammalite Cup for C6 or better class over 2180 metres.

Taken back to the tail of the field from outside the front line as the mobile pulled away, The Noble Steed was set alight racing for the bell to park outside his stablemate Jaccka Lonny (Grant Campbell) for the final circuit.

In a punishing finish, The Noble Steed outstayed his rivals to register a 3.5 metre margin over Queens Advocate along the sprint lane after trailing the pacemaker, with Jaccka Lonny weakening to finish third 1.3 metres away. The mile rate 2-00.6.

Return as winner

■ At Mildura on Wednesday, Grant Campbell's injury plagued sit/sprinter 10-Y-0 Legacy Of Power/ Muckinbar Miss gelding National Service returned to the winners list for the first time in over 12 months when victorious in the Cosmic Packaging Pace for C5 or better class over 1790 metres much to the delight of Horsham's Lane family.

Molander team shines at Melton ■ Riddell co-trainers Nicole and Dean Molander chalked up a double at the Geelong fixture held at Tabcorp Park Melton on Monday February 8 - top line filly High Gate taking the Nevele R 3-Y-0 Trotters Mobile over 2240 metres and Uncas the Haras Des Trotteurs Moble for T3 or better class over 1720 metres.

High Gate last season's Redwood winner bred by Breckon Bloodstock Ltd and raced by them in conjunction with the Super Seven Syndicate, led for the majority of the trip to easily account for Keayang Yankee (first up since June) which raced parked for the final circuit, with Sky Majesty (three back the markers third.

The mile rate 2-00.1.

Eight year old Sundon/ Chiquita Dee gelding Uncas (Josh Duggan) only just got there after an easy one/one passage, scoring by 1.3 metres in 2-00.1 from a game Zhenya (Jodi Quinlan) which faced the breeze when first up since November. Boundary Row was third 11.1 metres away after leading .

Rocket ■ At Charlton on Monday, the in-form Kyneton stable of Greg and Steve Leight were successful with 5-Y-0 Lawman/ Kellybrooke gelding Law Legend in the North West AG Services Trotters Handicap for T1 or better class over 2570 metres.

Beginning like a rocket from 20 metres, Law Legend was in front shortly after the start as the leader Its Not Dark Yet went off stride, although she probably wouldn't have been able to hold him out.

Allowed to bowl for the rest of the journey, Law Legend ran his rivals ragged, scoring by 7.8 metres in advance of Tella Tall tale which trailed and Its Not Dark Yet which settled four back the markers.

It was Law Legend's 6th victory in 63 outings.

Wide ■ Sutton Grange trainer Ross Graham combined with Todd Matthews aboard 4-Y-0 Tell All/ Baroda Bell gelding Animated to land the Bayswater Jayco Pace for C1 class over 2100 metres, leading virtually throughout from gate two, scoring by 3.1 metres over a deathseating Dean Martin and Repeat After Me which raced wide over the concluding stages. The mile rate 1-59.8.

Baker’s Delight

Harness Racing

This Week’s Meetings

■ Wednesday - Yarra Valley/Nyah @ Swan Hill, Thursday - Maryborough/Gunbower @ Echuca, Friday - Melton, Saturday - Terang (Cup), Sunday Ballarat, Monday - Kilmore, Tuesday - Bendigo.

Horses To Follow

Melbourne

Observer

len-baker@ bigpond.com

with Len Baker

Smart ■ Bacchus Marsh trainer Michael Chircop produced a smart youngster by the name of General Dodge to land the Jims Mowing 3-Y-0 Breeders Crown Pace over 1720 metres at the Geelong fixture held at Tabcorp Park Melton on Monday February 8 when making his race debut.

Given a lovely trip one/ one by Craig Demmler, General Dodge (gate four) a gelded son of Courage Under Fire and Sheeza Keeper, moved three wide approaching the final bend and despite shifting out in the straight, scored by a head over the pacemaker Anything For Love in a mile rate of 157.9. Seize Power was 9 metres away in third place after trailing the leader.

No waste ■ Daylesford's Mick Barby and Anne-Maree Conroy were successful with 7-Y-0 In The Pocket/ /Beauty Rainbow mare Pocket Of Fortune in the Geelong Trots Kids Night Out Vicbred Trotters Mobile for T1 & T2 class over 2240 metres at Melton.

Not wasting any time in going forward from gate three on the second line to park outside the leader Mister Oz, Pocket Of Fortune forged to the front in the back straight on the final occasion and although getting weary as the winning post loomed, held on to score by a head from Rumbaron (three wide last lap) and Aussie Beach Blond from last in a rate of 2-01.8.

Settled ■ Orrvale trainer Steven Duffy snared the Happy 90th Birthday Ena Davidson Pace for C1 class over 1609 metres at Charlton with 6-Y-0 Lis Mara/Gee Cam entire Last Issue in a rate of 157.5.

Driven by Nathan Jack, Last Issue settled three back along the markers after starting from inside the second row with Lucy McCool leading from gate three.

Easing the wide on the final bend, Last Issue pounced on the leaders in the straight to record a runaway 9.3 metre margin over Blissful Spanker which trailed the weakening pacemaker who finished third.

Coasted

■ Astute Ararat trainer Terry Young combined with Bendigo based Haydon Gray aboard 4-Y0 Courage Under Fire/ Soho Artemis gelding Justbritell to register an easy victory in the Charlton Cup February 28th Pace for C2 & C3 class over 1609 metres at Charlton on Monday February 8.

Taking a concession, Justbritell raced by Terry and close friend Terry Cahill led easily from gate four, coasting to the wire 4.1 metres in advance of Captain Snoozzze along the sprint lane from three back the markers and Aheadofhistime which followed the winner. The mile rate 1-59.4.

Big win

■ At Shepparton on Thursday, Bolinda's Kari Males scored a big victory with 5-Y-0 Modern Art/ Bella Aurora gelding Heza Modern Guy who was successful in the Saddleworld Shepparton Pace for C1 class over 2190 metres.

Driven by Zac Phillips who has enjoyed a tremendous season, Heza Modern Guy bred and raced by long time client Rob Auber and partners possied one/one from gate two on the second line and after being shuffled back and making various moves at different stages, ended up mid-field.

Gaining a three wide trail in the final circuit, Heza Modern Guy finished hard down the centre of the track.

■ Whatelsugot, Sparkling Success, Charlies System, Rumbaron, Westernview Jack, Macterra Hawk, Keayang Yankee, Boadiceas Fury, Riley James, Dean Martin.

Obliterated rivals ■ Terang trainer Darren Cole's much improved 6Y-0 Modern Art/Me Dolli Kit gelding Super Zeck obliterated his rivals in the BlazeAid.com Trotters Handicap for T2 or better class over 2200 metres at Ballarat on Friday.

With John Caldow in the sulky, Super Zeck after stepping cleanly from 50 metres soon tacked on to the field and was immediately sent forward to lead at the bell, running his rivals ragged to register a 8.9 metre victory over the early pacemaker Mallee Trapper and Miracle. The mile rate 2-01.3.

Led all the way ■ Kerryn Manning's top class 4-Y-0 Mach Three/ Bella Joy mare Supersonic Miss was ultra impressive in taking the $25,575 Flying Horse Bistro Tontine Final for C2 to C4 class over 2200 metres at Ballarat, leading all of the way from the pole to score by an easy 14.3 metres in advance of Kotare York which trailed and Vapar Grin which followed the pair. The mile rate 1-56.5.

Landed the Cup ■ Terang trainer Mattie Craven enjoyed a good night at Mount Gambier on Friday, winning three races - training two and driving three..

Six year old Sutter Hanover/Craigpaula gelding Smoken Pump Action snared the 1st Heat of the Mount Gambier Cup and Gotta Go Cullect/Smooth Treos filly Lagom the Three Year Old Pace. Mattie also guided the Graeme Howard trained Just Be Modern to victory in the R1 & R2 class Pace.

Ararat's Ronald Praag combined with Rod Barker to land the $7,000 Mount Gambier Trotters Cup for T1 or better class over 2590 metres with 9Y-0 Keystone Crosby/Lochlee Navarra gelding Lochlee Jacob at gigantic odds of $51.30, leading all of the way to defeat Shes Excited and Glorious Finale in a rate of 2-08.4.

Made race debut ■ At Ballarat on Friday, Melton's Alison Chisholm produced a smart juvenile by the name of Whats The Catch to land the Diamond Rewards Join Now 2-Y-0 Pace over 1710 metres, leading throughout from gate two in accounting for Oracine which trailed and Artsterical in 1-57.3.

A colt by Four Starzzz Shark from Cherie McTago, Whats The Catch raced by the Chisholm family was making his race debut.

Possied midfield

■ Junortoun's Bruce Morgan was successful with Lucky Ha Ha, a Grinfromeartoear/Lucky Bonus filly in the Shepparton Yearling Sale 3-Y-0 Pace over 1690 metres at Shepparton on Thursday.

Driven by John Caldow, Lucky Ha Ha starting from gate two on the second line possied mid-field in the moving line, with Crystal Colony (gate five spearing away to lead.

Moving forward three wide solo in the last lap, Lucky Ha Ha sustained a long run to gain the day by 1.6 metres over the pacemaker and New Romantics (one/two) who was a half head away in third place. The mile rate 1-57.4.

■ Listen to Len Baker on Harness Review, 8pm10pm Mondays, on 97.9 FM, streamed in 979fm.com.au

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 37

Observer Victorian Sport

Showbiz Extra

Melbourne

■ From Page 30

Top 10 Lists

Back on the agenda

■ The trial of having raceskept at 30minute intervals at race meetings has been extended for a further week to conclude on Friday (Feb. 19).

As I mentioned in my column last week, Racing Victoria is keen to give it a go to jazz up meetings for the racing public.

I have done the rounds talking to the main contributors the trainers, their staff and jockeys, as to how they felt.

A number of them felt that the half-hour break wasn't enough, especially for jockeys, if there happens to be a protest on the previous race.

With trainers, the long trek at Sandown and Flemington can take its toll on trainers or attendants.

Racing Victoria Chief Executive, Bernie Saundry, said that the decision to extend the trial was necessary as the data from the opening weekend of the trial was compromised by the Sky Racing broadcast.

"We are committed to exploring opportunities to innovate racing and the goal of this trial was to determine whether shorter gaps between races was achievable operationally, and whether it would enhance the raceday experience for fans and participants," Saundry said.

"We have had plenty of positive feedback from fans and participants that attended race meeting with the half-hour break and are in the process of capturing information from them to help inform any future decisions on this concept.

"The move of the majority of the recent weekend races to Sky Racing's secondary channel has compromised our ability to capture relevant and effective data on both wagering and the offcourse experience and as a result we needed to extend the trial for a further week."

Racing Victoria's current trial will extend into the second on the same terms as the first with the first race commencing at 1.30pm before continuing on the half hour.

The shorter gaps

Ted Ryan

NEW RELEASE TELEVISION, DOCUMENTARY AND MUSIC DVD HIGHLIGHTS: CHICAGO FIRE: Season 3.

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT: Season 7.

MASTERS OF SEX: Season 3.

COVERT AFFAIRS: Season 5.

LAST OF THE SUMMER WINE: Series 27 & Series 28.

BACK IN TIME. RECTIFY: Season 3.

NURSE JACKIE: Season 7.

MOLLY. THE ROCKFORD FILES: Season 4.

- James Sherlock ■ From Page 9

Fly Guardian

● Extreme Choice Photo by SLICKPIX, phone 9354 5754

duce the length of the day by an hour on metropolitan Saturdays and between 45 minutes and an hour at country meetings.

However a lot of racegoers are not happy with the late start of 1.30pm and the finish around at 5.30pm.

Leading jockey, Ben Melham, has suggested that due to time constraints, jockeys need help to get their gear ready for each ride.

His suggestion is to use budding young apprentices to help in this regard to help with their education, when they take up riding.

If there were a cost involved, surely it wouldn't come back on the jockey who needs help.

This should be a Racing Victoria problem, if there is a cost involved.

It's common knowledge that a number of leading riders have someone who is responsible of getting their gear to the track and setting it up for each race they ride in.

Damien Oliver and

Craig Williams are two that come to mind, and in the past Darren Beadman.

Former jockey, Chris Barrett, was one of those that looked after jockeys with their gear on racedays.

■ From Page 9

Two and Two

● Srikandi Photo by SLICKPIX, phone 9354 5754

2 of 3

■ Once again the Victoria Racing Club is rejoicing with yet another win in the Major Festivals and Events category making it two out of three, over the last three years.

The Victoria Racing Club was recognised for the 2014 Melbourne Cup Carnival for the event's economic impacts and promotion of Victoria and Australia to audience around the globe.

Accepting the award, VRC Chief Executive Simon Love said the Melbourne Cup Carnival is the jewel in Australia's major event crown.

The VRC invests $50 million each year to stage the Mel-

Radoslaw Figura, the Polish playwright, has written a disturbing piece that challenges western orthodoxy about religion and belief.

The makeshift setting of a dilapidated dwelling is a perfect location for an indigent individual covered as it is with cobwebs and almost senseless bric-a-brac.

It mirrors the pointless accumulation and waste in our own lives. There is the ever present hint of flies with their hum in the background counterpointed at the beginning and end of the play with Thiele’s What A Wonderful World.

And Kristof portrayal of the flawed Old Man highlights the command and contradiction that is to be found in a father figure - be he divine or simply human.

Fly Guardian is on at the La Mama Courthouse until February 21.

- Review by David McLean

bourne Cup Carnival, which in turn benefits the Victorian economy to the tune of $370 million, and the Australian economy, $700 million.

More than 325,000 racegoers attended the four-day Melbourne Cup, Carnival in 2014 at Flemington.

This included visitors from 43 countries, generating $28.38 million in accommodation.

Late last year, the event won the Victorian Tourism Awards for the third consecutive year, earning the Melbourne Cup Carnival a place in the Hall of Fame.

B’down ■ Young Caulfield

● Tarzino Photo by SLICKPIX, phone 9354 5754

Racing Obser ver

trainer, Ciaron Maher, was a shattered man at training at Caulfield when his sprinting star, top mare, Srikandi, was found to have injured her hind leg.

At the time of going to press he was still pondering as to how bad the injury is, but she could be out for the autumn.

On top of this another star of his stable brilliant three-year old filly, Petite Filou (French for the Little Thief), has also had a setback and will miss the Autumn carnivals.

Down the track Maher is hoping to have her ready to race in the Sangster's Stakes in Adelaide.

On the brighter side, another of his top stayers, Victoria Oaks winner, Jameka, is doing everything right and is on target likely to return this week, with the ATC Derby in

Sydney her main goal on return.

Preview ■ In next week's edition of the Melbourne Observer, I will have a look at the main chances in the Blue Diamond Stakes to be held at Caulfield on February 27.

Early chances appear to be Extreme Choice, Flying Artie, Defcon, and Calliope.

Caulfield trainer, Mick Price has two of the fancied runners the favourite, Extreme Choice and Flying Artie, John O'Shea, Calliope, and Peter and Paul Snowdenare running their top fancy, Defcon.

The Snowdens won the Classic last year with Pride of Dubai, who unfortunately was injured and has been retired.

More next week, after the Blue Diamond Preludes.

The terrific dual-location set constructed

by Damian Jones and dressed by Helen McIntosh represents the traditional high standard of Peridot Theatre productions.

The cast works hard to deliver Benfield’s plentiful but lightweight dialogue, and special hearty thanks to all actors for stoically not missing a beat at the performance I attended, on an extremely hot day with a non-working air-conditioner.

Critically speaking, Procter’s dog’s weird bark is always heard from house left. Even when Procter is required to scold his dog facing house right, the barking continues from the opposite direction. This fractures believability.

For fun, frivolous entertainment where you can sit back, relax and have a good laugh, don’t miss seeing Two and Two Together until February 20.

Performance season: Until February 20 at 8pm Venue: The Unicorn Theatre, Mt Waverley Secondary College, Lechte Rd., Mt Waverley Bookings: 9808 0770 or 1300 138 645 or email tickets@peridot.com.au - Review by Cheryl Threadgold ■ From Page 9

Remembering Molly

“After we had finished he and I were having a vodka and orange and reminiscing about the past,” Frank Howson remembers “And I said to him, "You know who gave you your name, Molly, don't you?"

“And he said "Yeah. Stan Rofe." And I said "Well who do you think he got it from, dummy?"

“And we had a laugh and I told Molly the story I've just told you. Molly had no idea.

“There have been many stories of how he got the name but most are far from the truth.”.

- Ash Long

The Last Word ■ “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”

- Winston S. Churchill ■ “It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”

- E.E. Cummings

Page 38 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Trades and Services Guide Find the bes adespeople in the Melbourne Observ es Guide bestt trtradespeople Observer Services Guide.. TToo plac placee an ad, phone 1800 231 311 311.. er Tr ades and Servic Our Classifieds Departmen 30pm Monda rida or @MelbourneObserv er 9am-5.30pm Mondayy -F -Frida ridayy . Or email: edit editor or@MelbourneObserv @MelbourneObserver er..c om.au Departmentt is open 9am-5.

Or mail your ad to: Melbourne Observer, PO Box 1278, Research, Vic 3095.

Booking and ccoo ppyy deadline: 5pm FFrida rida erms and CConditions onditions - see our wwebsit ebsit ridayy s. Subjec Subjectt ttoo our TTerms ebsitee .

CONSULTING

BLUEDASH CONSULTING Bookkeeping, Accounting, BAS & Training 10% Discount on off-site work

CURTAINS, BLINDS

PHONE: 1800 231 311 FAX: 1800 231 312 EMAIL: editor@MelbourneObserver.com.au

PAVING

TAX TIME

BRICK PAVING SPECIALIST

☛ All aspects of paving including: Claym Brick, Sandstone Bluestone & Castlemaine Slate ☛ All aspects of landscape construction 25 years experience ☎ Glen

0412 516 936

PC /CC16

RELAXATION MASSAGE

Call Ben 0403 591 216 ben.hurree@ gmail.com BB /I I16

Promote your business statewide in the Melbourne Observer Trades and Services Guide

THE GREA T MUSIC OF THE ‘30s T O ‘60s GREAT TO Str eaming thr ough the W eb treaming through Web PHONE: 9572 1466

goldenda ysr adio goldenday sradio adio..com

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 - Page 39

Page 40 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, February 17, 2016

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au