Melbourne Observer. September 13, 2017

Page 1

NEW WBIZ ★ LIFES TYLE ★ TR AVEL ★ FEA TURES ★ BARGAINS ★ SPORT NEWSS ★ SHO SHOWBIZ LIFESTYLE TRA FEATURES

Melbourne

Observer

$2

Melbourne

95

ISSN 1447 4611

Observer

Ph 1800 231 311 Fx 1800 231 312

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 13, 2017

VICTORIA’S INDEPENDENT WEEKLY NEWSPAPER

48TH YEAR OF PUBLICATION $2.95

S TATE EDITION Vol 49 No 1680 SERVING VICTORIA SINCE 1969

THAT’S ENTERTAINMENT Warning about ‘real estate agent’

■ Consumer Affairs Victoria is urging consumers to avoid engaging Craig Alan McIntosh for real estate services. The Director of Consumer Affairs Victoria, Simon Cohen, issued the public warning notice regarding the conduct of McIntosh in the supply of real estate services. McIntosh is not and has never been a licensed estate agent in Victoria. Consumer Affairs Victoria obtained injunctions against McIntosh under the ACL (Vic) in March 2015, barring him from acting as an estate agent until he was licensed to do so. Mr McIntosh worked as an agent’s representative with a licensed estate agent operating under various trading names, including McIntosh Lincoln, McIntosh Lincoln City Residential, and McIntosh Lincoln Property Concierge until February this year.

including GST

■ Entertainer Dorothy Baker, who became known to TV viewers through her appearances on Graham Kennedy’s In Melbourne Tonight, caught up with Melbourne Observer columnist Kevin Trask, when our photographer spotted them in Kew. In addition to his Observer column each week, Kevin presents a two-hour radio program, That’s Entertainment, on 96.5 Inner FM every Sunday afternoon, as well as appearing on 3AW’s Remember When program on Sunday nights.

DATSUNS

WANTED. Datsun Skyline. 1973-85. 240K, C210, MR30, Parts, complete, any condition. Pay cash. 0422 076 298.

MERIMBULA, NSW VACANCIES AVAILABLE

BEACH ST APARTMENTS 1 Beach St, Merimbula, NSW 2548 Phone: (02) 6495 2205 www.beachs tr eetapartments.net.au .beachstr treetapartments.net.au

TURN TO PAGE 2

146 ARGUS ST, CHELTENHAM VIC 3192 TEL: 9585 2822 KINGSTONFUNERALS .COM.AU

THE GREA T GREAT MUSIC OF THE ‘30s TO ‘60s Streaming through the Web PHONE: 9572 1466

goldenda ysr adio goldenday sradio adio..com

Camberwell Sewing Centre

LATEST SPECIALS ● See advert, back page

Turn To Page 21


Page 2 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Travel

MERIMBULA, NSW

2017 HOLIDAY VACANCIES AVAILABLE: ASK US!

BEACH STREET APARTMENTS

Set beside the sparkling waters of Merimbula Lake, you can watch the boats passing while eating breakfast. 1 and 2 bedroom fully self-contained apartments with spa and ensuite. Pool, BBQ and under cover parking. 2 minute walk to a safe swimming beach and shops, clubs and restaurants. Beautiful water views. 1 Beach Street, Merimbula, NSW 2548 Phone: (02) 6495 2205 E-mail: info@beachstreetapartments.net.au www.beachstreetapartments.net.au


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 3


Page 4 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 5


Page 6 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au Melbourne

Observer

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 7

Showbiz Latest

It’s All About You!

Melbourne

May contain sex scenes Observer ■ May Contain Sex Scenes is being presented in the Melbourne Fringe Festival from September 26 – 30 at the Old Café at the Meat Market, North Melbourne. This interactive physical theatre experience claims to be a bold ode to body-love and the playful pursuit of pleasure. After sold out seasons at both the Wellington and Nelson Fringe Festivals, May Contain Sex Scenes makes its international debut in Melbourne this September, nilled as a ‘naughty, sex-positive adult show’. Creator and actor Sabrina Martin says that the personal stories at the heart of the work aim to instigate conversations about sexual shame and stigma. "There’s still so much social taboo and confusion surrounding sex, especially for women. I just hope people leave the show proud and empowered to talk openly about their preferences and fantasies, about what they want and how to get it.’ Performances: September 26 – 30. Times: 8pm on Weds, Thu, Fri, Sat and also 9.30pm on Thu, Fri, Sat (60 min). Venue: The Old Cafe at Meat Market (Emerald City, Upswing Arts) 5 Blackwood St, North Melbourne. Tickets: Full: $25, Concession: $22 , Early Bird & Members: $20 (No group discount). Bookings: melbournefringe.com.au

‘Precipice’ at Circus Centre ■ The National Institute of Circus Arts presents Precipice from September 20 – 23 at the NICA National Circus Centre, Prahran. Australia’s next generation of circus talents will be on show as NICA circus artists leap into a world of chaos, defying danger in an effort to celebrate life – through tumbles, turns, shifts and falls. Interrogating the impermanence of time, physical and psychological senses. The elite NICA circus artists have spent the last two years honing their circus and perfor-

mance skills, guided by world-class trainers including Aaron Walker, vertical aerial specialist and trainer for the past twenty years; Vasily Ivanov who toured the world with the Moscow Circus for over a decade, and; Earl Shatford, a master juggler who is currently chasing the Guinness World Record for the most rings juggled while bouncing a ball on a head pedestal. Onstage the performers will present spectacular solo and duo acts including roue Cyr,

So long Connie

In This Edition

News: Tap Dance Festival Gavin Wood: West Hollywood Nostalgic Photos: Kinglake Unclaimed Money: $100,000 available Whatever Happened: Jack Benny OK: Robbie Williams is back Observer Classics: Mark Twain Harness Racing: Len Baker writes Showbiz Section: Fringe Festival Lovatt’s Mega Crossword Observer Racing: Ted Ryan Country Music Movies, DVDs Local Theatre The Arts

Observer Showbiz

Latest News AroundVictoria

Man arrestedc

group acrobatics, handstands, adagio, unicycle, juggling, aerial rope, diablo, head trapeze and multicorde. The NICA performers range in age from 30 (clowning specialist Ciara Thorburn) to 18 (foot juggler/ flying trapeze artist Karla Scott) and include: hoop rolling and aerial chair artist Georgia DeGuara, who also teaches in outreach programs; Poppy Fairbairn who trained as a ballet dancer for 20 years before discovering her inner acrobat, and was selected to perform in Hugh Jackman’s show The Boy from Oz and; martial artist Zion Martyn. Fairbairn and Martyn perform as a duo, specialising in Pointe Adagio: a graceful fusion of gentle and fluid ballet pas de deux spiced up with a combination of dynamic and thrilling partner acrobatics. They are the only duo in Australia to perform pointe adagio. Precipice is directed by former Cirque Du Soleil artist Zebastian Hunter, conceived by Hunterand Stephen Sewell, devised by dancer Meredith Kitchen and designed by Stephanie Howe. Hunter a trainer, performance teacher and co-ordinator at NICA, has worked as an artistic trainer at Flying Fruit Fly Circus and the National Circus School of Montreal; Kitchen a trained professional dancer has worked with Australian Dance Theatre, Dance North, Chrissie Parrot Dance Collective and The One Extra Company, and is now Artistic Assistant with the legendary Paris company Compagnie Philippe Genty. Performance Season: September 20 – 23 Venue: NICA National Circus Centre, Prahran Bookings: www.nica.com.au - Cheryl Threadgold

■ Police have arrested a man following an assault and robbery in Balaclava on Monday. Investigators have been told a man was working at a Carlisle St premises when he was knocked to the back of the head and had his ute stolen. Shortly before 1am yesterday (Tues.), Police observed the same vehicle allegedly run a red light on Fitzroy St, St Kilda. A pursuit was initiated but quickly terminated shortly after due to safety reasons. A short time later, Police received reports that the vehicle had been involved in a collision onHighbury Grove, Prahran with the driver allegedly running from the scene. He was located soon after with assistance from the air wing and dog squad behind a residence on Chomley St, Prahran and subsequently arrested.

‘Blew .123’

■ A Kyneton motorcyclist, 54, has had his bike impounded after allegedly drink driving in Carlsruhe. Macedon Ranges Highway Patrol members detected the motorcycle allegedly travelling at 142kmh in a 100kmh zone on Cobb and Co Rd. His licence was immediately suspended and his bike impounded at a cost of $1225.

Forecast ■ ■ ■ ■ ■

Today (Wed.). Showers. 5°-14° Thurs. Scattered showers. 9°-13° Fri. Showers. 6°-16° Sat. Scattered showers. 3°-12° Sun. Mostly sunny. 8°-17°

Mike McColl Jones

Top 5

● Connie Johnson ■ Gold Logie winner Samuel Johnson re“Please leave your tributes there, so our leased this statement following the death of family can keep them forever? his sister Connie on Friday (Sept. 8): www.loveforconnie.org “We lost Connie today. Or, as she asked “I'm sad and sorry to be the one to tell you me to say, she died of cancer today. this, yet at the same time, as the Chief Custo“It was so beautiful. We laughed, we cried, dian of my sister’s legacy, I also feel extremely we sang stupid songs from our childhood to grateful and proud. her, which she loved (mostly!). “I'm off to cuddle the fam and warmly em“I read her so many village messages, brace an exquisite whisky, in memory of my which she relished. She went so richly, and sister, who did so bloody well, from start to with such grace. Trust me, she was genuinely finish. cushioned by your love, till the end. “Thanks for everything, Connie “Smart people helped me build a place for Cottonsocks. It was my pleasure to be your us villagers to share our confusement. Sammy Seal.”

THE TOP 5 COMMENTS HEARD WHEN PRESIDENT TRUMP PHONED PRIME MINISTER TURNBULL. 5. "Mr Trumbull, will you accept a reverse charge call?". 4. "Mr President,did Jorn Utzon style your hair?". 3. "I'll swap you a ride in 'Air Force One', for a couple of Grand Final tickets?". 2. "Hey Mal ... can you give Julie Bishop my private number!" 1. (INDIAN VOICE) "Congratulations, you have won a Bunnings voucher!"


Page 8 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Melbourne

Observer

Melbourne

Observer

Photos From The Past

ARIES: (March 21-April 20) Lucky Colour: Cream Lucky Day: Friday Racing Numbers: 5.3.2.1. Lotto Numbers: 2.13.26.36.35.8. You may have to do a bit of travelling to improve your financial situation. Love life seems to be most important at the moment and the welfare of your loved ones uppermost in your mind.

Contact Us Office: 30 Glen Gully Rd, Eltham, 3095 Postal: PO Box 1278, Research, Vic 3095 Phone: +61 3 9439 9927 Fax: +61 3 9431 6247 Web: ww w.MelbourneObserv e rr..com.au .MelbourneObserve or@MelbourneObserv e rr..com.au E: Edit ditor@MelbourneObserv or@MelbourneObserve

TAURUS: (April 21- May 20) Lucky Colour: White Lucky Day: Tuesday Racing Numbers: 1.3.2.5. Lotto Numbers: 1.15.25.23.36.7. Try to keep a cool head with your finances even though there maybe some temptation to spend on useful items. It is much better to do a job yourself rather than rely on others. You feel they will have let you down.

Our Team

Distribution

● Melbourne City Baths. 1914.

LEO: (July 23-August 22) Lucky Colour: Blue Lucky Day: Friday Racing Numbers: 1.2.5.2. Lotto Numbers: 1.12.23.36.32.20. It is a very happy time in your love life and there is a surprise in store for you. Do not spend money that you haven't got, you tend to be living in a bit of a fantasy world where money is concerned.

● Cable tram, Market St, City. Circa 1900.

VIRGO: (August 23- September 23) Lucky Colour: Black Lucky Day: Wednesday Racing Numbers: 2.3.2.5. Lotto Numbers: 1.12.26.35.40.45. You could do the wrong thing if you criticise someone at work and this could result in your loosing the support you need. Many happy moments are indicated in your love life. LIBRA: (September 24- October 23) Lucky Colour: Cream Lucky Day: Tuesday Racing Numbers: 1.3.2.5. Lotto Numbers: 1.15.45.20.32.22. Make sure you understand what people are saying, misunderstandings could cause problems and loss of revenue. Not a good time to ask anyone to stay at your place, leave invitations till later.

If your local newsagent does not curr ently sstt ock the Melbourne Observ e rr,, currently Observe why not place a weekly order with them, by using their ‘putaway’ service. Newsagents should contact All Day Distribution Pty Ltd, 169 Burwood Road, Hawthorn, Vic 3122. Phone: (03) 9482 1145.

SCORPIO: (October 24- November 22) Lucky Colour: Yellow Lucky Day: Friday Racing Numbers: 2.3.2.1. Lotto Numbers: 1.12.25.8.6.11. Some news from faraway and this could give you an idea about your next holiday destination.A lucky streak could make a few plans happen sooner than you thought. Take your partner into your confidence.

Across The World

Back Copies

GEMINI: (May 21- June 21) Lucky Colour: Peach Lucky Day: Monday Racing Numbers: 1.3.2.5. Lotto Numbers: 2.3.12.26.35.40. The extra effort needed to keep someone happy will be worth it in the long run. Keep away from arguments and problems at work as much as possible. Just let others do their own thing. CANCER: (June 22- July 22) Lucky Colour: Violet Lucky Day: Wednesday Racing Numbers: 1.3.6.5. Lotto Numbers: 1.12.26.35.5.4. It is at present an accident prone period for most. Keep your eyes open for opportunities. There is some good luck coming your way from unexpected sources.

S ta dition: A vailable w eekly a tatte E Edition: weekly att approx. 400 newsagents across the Melbourne metropolitan area, Mornington Peninsula, Geelong, Bellarine Peninsula, Surf coast, and Victorian regional centres. Recommended retail price: $2.95.

Melbourne Observer Online 2. 2.11 million hits annually annually.. w w w.MelbourneObserv e rr..c om.au .MelbourneObserve You can rread ead our paper fr ee on the free internet. Contact details for our advertisers are also available at our website.

Your Stars with Kerry Kulkens

inc orpor a ting the Melbourne A d vvertiser ertiser, incorpor orpora Ad Melbourne T ict orian Rur al Ne ws Trr ader ader,, V Vict ictorian Rural New and Melbourne Seniors News News.. Victoria’s Independent Newspaper First Published September 14, 1969 Every W ednesda y Wednesda ednesday

Editor: Ash Long Features Editor: Peter Mac Columnists: Len Baker (harness racing), Matt Bissett-Johnson (cartoonist), David Ellis (wine and travel), Rob Foenander (country music), Kerry Kulkens (astrology), Nick Le Souef (outback Australia), Mike McColl Jones (life), Greg Ne wman (r adio ), T erry Radf or d ((C C ourt ewman (radio adio), Terry Radfor ord roundsman), Aaron Rourke (movies), Ted Ry an (r acing), Jim Sherlock Ryan (racing), (movies, DVDs), Cheryl Threadgold (local thea e ), K e vin T sho wbiz), theatt rre Ke Trrask ((sho showbiz), Wood (Hollyw Veritas, G avin W ood (Holly w ood). Honorary Reviewers: Mark Briggs, Rita Crispin, Martin Curtis, Sherryn Danaher Danaher,, Barbar a Hughes, L yn Hurs t, K athryn Barbara Lyn Hurst, Ka Keeble, Beth Klein, Deborah Marinaro, Gr aeme McC oubrie therine , McGr egor Graeme McCoubrie oubrie,, Ca Catherine McGregor egor,, David McLean, Maggie Morrison, Jill Pa g e ylie Rackham, Elizabeth Semmel. e,, K Kylie Distribution: Sam Fiorini, phone 9482 1145

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

● Tram on North Carlton route, St Kilda Rd. Circa 1910

Back Copies - Archives w w w.MelbourneObserv e rr..c om.au .MelbourneObserve Back copies for 1969-89, 2002-15 may be inspected by appointment at the State Library of Victoria. 328 Swanston St, Melbourne.

Independently Owned and Operated

SAGITTARIUS: (November23- December20) Lucky Colour: Pink Lucky Day: Sunday Racing Numbers: 2.3.2.1. Lotto Numbers: 1.12.25.6.30.11. The lines of communications should be kept clear as problems could arise from conflicting information. Re unions with old friends from way back should bring lots of fun and a little variety into your life. CAPRICORN: (December 21- January 19) Lucky Colour: Silver Lucky Day: Wednesday Racing Numbers: 1.3.5.9. Lotto Numbers: 8.12.5.44.40.33. Arguments are very easy to get into but hard to get out off, so keep out of the way of irritating people.You could get a not so welcome invitation, so have your excuses ready. Luck with the colour red. AQUARIUS: (January 20- February 19) Lucky Colour: Green Lucky Day: Monday Racing Numbers: 4.5.2.6. Lotto Numbers: 1.12.15.26.34.40. Lots of people around you during this period and it is up to you how to get along with them. Everyone seems to take the cue from you and your experience will come in handy now.

The Melbourne Observer is printed under contract by Streamline PressPty Ltd, 155 Johns o y, ffor or the publisher Johnstton S t, Fitzr Fitzro publisher,, Local Media Pty Ltd. ABN 67 096 680 063, of the registered office, 30 Glen Gully Rd, Eltham, Vic 3095. Distributed by All Day Distribution. Responsibilityfor election and referendum comment is accepted by Ash Long. C op yright © 20 ty L opyright 2011 7 7,, L ocal Media P Pty Lttd. ACN 096 680 063.

PISCES: (February 20- March 20) Lucky Colour: Silver Lucky Day: Saturday Racing Numbers: 1.3.2.5. Lotto Numbers: 1.12.15.26.30.33. There will be moments when you are not sure how to act, but someone in a position to help will advice you on the matter. Benefits from deeds done in the past and people from the past contacting you.

● Tram stop, Swanston St, Melbourne.

Visit Kerry Kulkens Magic Shop at 1693 Burwood Hwy, Belgrave Phone/Fax 9754 4587 www.kerrykulkens.com.au Like us on Facebook


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Arts Footscray Community Arts Created + Cremated James Hullick, director of JOLT, constructs sculptural forms from hard rubbish donated by members of the local community and devises kinetic sound machines that will respond to these sculptures. Examining the act of recycling, the ephemeral nature of possessions and the role of art in civic life, this exhibition includes a sound art performance and a ceremonial cremation of the artwork that will be reimagined and remounted back to the gallery. Exhibition runs to Saturday September 30. Art as AGame Changer: Art for a cause or a cause for Art? Is there an onus on artists o probe fault lines, social protocols and areas of discomfort, or to create art that encourages social change? Join this discussion to hear from a diverse panel of artists and activists who will come together to talk about the role of art and social change. Tuesday, September 19.(90 minutes) 7.30pm at the Basement Theatre. Cost Free. - Peter Kemp

Morn. Peninsula Regional Gallery The National Photographic Portrait Prize. Since its inception in 2007 the National Photographic Portrait Prize has become a much anticipated annual fixture on the ravelling exhibition circuit. Celebrating its 10th anniversary this year, the NPPP is exclusively displayed in Victoria at the MPRG. The 49 selected works reflect the distinctive vision of Australia's aspiring and professional portrait photographers and the unique nature of their subjects. Renowned Sydney portrait photographer Gary Grealy took out the $25.000 award for his portrait if Richard Morecroft and Alison Mackey For the first time ever, the National Portrait Gallery awarded two Highly Commended finalists: John Benavente for his portrait titled Renaissance Rose and Brett CanetGibson for his portrait Mastura. Character Traits: With over 150 examples of portraiture in the MPPG collection it is clear that portrait making is an enduring focus for many artists. But what is it that attracts an artist to capture a person's distinguishing quality in a picture , who are the artists choosing to paint and how does the relationship between artist and sitter influence the work? Character Traits draws together over 60 portraits from the collections across three relationship themes; the familiar - artists; children, siblings, partners and parents; the artist - other painters, writers and patrons, and the self. Artists include Tom Roberts, Janet Cumbrae-Stewart, Arthur Boyd, Fred Williams, Noel Counihan, Richard Larter, Louis Kahan, Pam Hollandal, Farrell and Parkin, Mike Parr and Gareth Simpson. Exhibition opens September 28 to November 26. ■ Civic Reserve, Dunns Rd, Mornington

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 9 Melbourne

Observer

Local Theatre

Tap Dance Festival ■ Australia’s sixth annual celebration of tap dancing comes to Melbourne: September 30October 6. The line-up of dancers will come from across Australia, New Zealand, Europe and the United States. The Australian Tap Dance Festival is the only festival of its kind in Australasia and offers an action-packed week of tap and choreography introductions, master classes, jams, dance battles and competitions, group practices, seminars and special events for all ages and levels. The festival will run across two of Melbourne’s best arts venues, the Dance Factory and Chapel Off Chapel. “The art of tap dance is always evolving and still thrives across the globe since its early American roots in the 1900s,” says festival producer and dancer Ella Lehaf. “From childhood tap lessons and adult fitness classes to the world stage showmanship of Tap Dogs, Riverdance and even The Book of Morman, tap dance continues to be rich with possibilities and new techniques which we aim to showcase at the festival.” Dates: September 30 – October 6 ● Australian tap dancer Brianna Taylor Venues: Dance Factory, 4-10 Yorkshire St., Bookings: www.australiantapdancefestival. Richmond / Chapel off Chapel, 12 Lt. Chapel St, com.au Prahran - Cheryl Threadgold

No Offence at The Alex

■ RAG Theatre presents No Offence from September 28 – 30 at The Alex Theatre, St Kilda, under the direction of Scott Gooding. RAG Theatre was formed in 1993 and is a community theatre group which supports arts and cultural participation for people with a diverse exper-

Melbourne Observations

with Matt Bissett-Johnson

Showbiz News

● Photography: Paul Dunn ience, and were joint winners (with SPARC Theatre) of the 2007 Melbourne Fringe Festival, Vic Health Community Cultural Development Award for Crisis and Rhapsody). Dates: September 28, 29, 30 - (September 30 is an Auslan interpreted show) Times: September 28, 29 at

7pm, 30 September at 2pm. Duration - 50 minutes Venue: The Alex Theatre 1/135 Fitzroy St, St Kilda Tickets: Concession - $8, Full Price - $15, Groups of 4 or more $8 Bookings: visit melbourne fringe.com.au or call 9660 9666

Monash Uni. Museum of Art Future Eaters: Monash Uni Museum of Art presents a range of contemporary Australian and international artists working with sculptural practices in our present technological age. Featuring several newly commissioned artworks and installations, the exhibition explores some of the ways sculptural materials and forms are changing as artists respond to the mediated and virtual realities of the world in which we live and work. Exhibition finishes on September 23. - Peter Kemp

■ Mordialloc Theatre Company: Equally Divided (by Ronald Harwood) Until September 16 at 64 Parkers Rd., Parkdale. Director: Cheryl Ballantine-Richards. Bookings: 9587 5141 or www.mordialloctheatre.com ■ OCPAC (Old Carey Performing Arts Club): Sweet Charity September 15 - 23 at MGH, Carey Boys Grammar School, Bakers Rd., Kew. Tickets: $35/$30. Bookings: https://chook.as/ocpac/sweet-charity www.ocpac.com.au ■ Eltham Little Theatre: It's a Wonderful Life Until September 16 at the Eltham Performing Arts Centre, 1603 Main Rd., Research. Bookings: www.trybooking or 0411 713 095. ■ Melbourne French Theatre: Every Trick in the Book (by Georges Feydeau) Until September 16 at the Pop-up Theatre, 203-205 Canning St., Carlton. Director:Alec Gilbert. Booking details: www.melbournefrench theatre.org.au ■ Phoenix Theatre Company: Rock ofAges Until September 16 at Doncaster Playhouse. Director/Choreographer: Renee Maloney; Musical Director: John Clancy. Bookings: www.phoenixtheatrecompany.org ■ Geelong Repertory Theatre Company: Exit Laughing (by Paul Elliot) September Until September 23 at 15 Coronation St., West Geelong. Director: Geoff Gaskill. Bookings: GPAC 5229 1130. ■ Essendon Theatre Company: Baby with the Bathwater (by Christopher Durang) September 14 - 23 at the Bradshaw Street Community Hall, Bradshaw Street, West Essendon (off Buckley St.). Director: Drew Mason. Bookings: 0422 029 483. ■ Heidelberg Theatre Company: The Club (by David Williamson) Until September 23 at 36 Turnham Ave.., Rosanna. Director: Gavin Williams. Bookings: 9457 4117 www.htc.org.au ■ Williamstown Little Theatre: The Seafarer (by Conor McPherson) Until September 23 at 2-4 Albert St., Williamstown. Director: Bruce Akers. Bookings: 9885 9678 www.wlt.org.au ■ Adelphi Players Theatre Company: Love Letters (by A. R. Gurney) Until September 17 at the Booran Road Hall, 264 Booran Rd., Ormond. Director: Michael Mace. Tickets: $15/$12. Bookings: 9690 1593. ■ SLAMS Musical Theatre: Little Shop of Horrors September 15 - 23 at Knox Community Arts Centre, Mountain Highway, Bayswater. Director: Will Sayer; Musical Director: Ryland Sack; Choreographer: Steph Clare-Cover. Bookings: 9720 3205. ■ Monash One Act Play Festival: September 22 - 24, hosted by Peridot Theatre at Mt Waverley Secondary College, Lechte Rd., Mt Waverley. Adjudicator: Susan Rundle. www.peridot.com.au ■ The Hartwell Players: The Laramie Project (by Moises Kaufman and Members of the Tectonic Theatre Project), September 28 - 30 at Ashwood High School Performing Arts Centre. Director: Kellie Tweeddale. Bookings: http://www.hartwellplayers.org.au/ or www.trybooking.com/ONJF

Auditions

■ Essendon Theatre Company: Unnecessary Farce (by Paul Slade Smith) September 19 at 7.30pm and September 24 at 2pm at the Bradshaw St. Community Hall, Bradshaw St., West Essendon. Director: George Benca. Audition bookings: georgebenca@gmail.com 0419 591 517. ■ Peridot Theatre: Rumors (by Neil Simon) October 22 at 7.00pm and October 23 at 7.30pn at the Unicorn Theatre, Lechte Rd., Mt Waverley. Director: Eyawn Harry. Audition bookings: 0403 769 691. ■ The Basin Theatre Group: It's Never Too Late (by Ron Aldridge) October 23 at 7.00pm at The Basin Theatre, Doongalla Rd., The Basin. Director: Christine Grant. Audition bookings: readrecdoll@gmail.com - Cheryl Threadgold


Page 10 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Observer Magazine

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Stateside with Gavin Wood in West Hollywood

Directors visit Ramada, WeHo ■ Hi everyone, from my suite at the Ramada Plaza Hotel and Suites comes this week's news.

Out and About

Creative minds meet ■ International hotelier Alan Johnson caught up with two of Australia's leading international film directors at the Ramada Hotel and Suites in West Hollywood. Michael Rymer is well known for his brilliant work on Battlestar Galactica, Queen of the Damned, In Too Deep, Deadline Gallipoli and more recently Picnic at Hanging Rock. Rod Hardy started his journey with Crawford Productions and has directed Daniel Radcliffe in December Boys and is soon to direct a mysterious French-Australian movie which is very top secret. Alan Johnson always supports Australians who are giving it a red-hot go in Hollywood.

● Michael Rymer, Alan Johnson and Rod Hardy at the Ramada Hotel and Suites, West Hollywood

Stars on hurricane telethon ■ Beyoncé leads a roster of big-name celebrities who've signed on to help raise money to benefit victims of Hurricane Harvey in a live telethon. George Clooney, Barbra Streisand and Oprah Winfrey were just a few of those set to appear during Hand in Hand: A Benefit for Hurricane Harvey Relief yesterday (Tues., Sept. 12). The one-hour special will air at 8pm ET across ABC, CBS, NBC, Fox and CMT. The benefit will also feature Julia Roberts, Reese Witherspoon, Matthew McConaughey, Dennis Quaid, Blake Shelton and country superstar George Strait. Proceeds from the event will be donated to several charities aiding recovery efforts in Houston, including the United Way of Greater Houston, Habitat for Humanity, Save the Children, Feeding Texas and the Mayor's Fund for Hurricane Harvey Relief.

GavinWood

From my Suite at the Ramada Plaza Complex on Santa Monica Blvd

Marty signs worldwide deal

■ Now here's something to really jump up and down on the couch for. Hollywood's worst-kept romantic secret the relationship between Jamie Foxx and Katie Holmes is finally out of the bag, after the couple was photographed walking hand in hand on the beach in Malibu on Labour Day, wearing matching fedoras no less. They have repeatedly denied they are in a relationship over the past few years, despite incessant rumours and frequent sightings of them together. ■ Scarlett Johansson and Colin Jost were spotted at Nick & Toni's holding hands and enjoying a late-night dinner, and Billy Joel with Gov. Andrew Cuomo were dining outside. ■ Kendall Jenner and Blake Griffin are definitely a couple, according to spies who saw them together on the beach at Soho House in Malibu on Sunday. One witness said: "They spent all day together on the beach and at Soho House's Little Beach House. It definitely looked like a date, or the early stages of a romance. They were laughing and having a good time." ■ Don't expect George and Amal Clooney to expand their brood anytime soon. "I'm 39," Amal told The Hollywood Reporter with a firm shake of her head when asked if she wanted more kids with her Oscar-winning husband. "I already had them quite late." Despite rumours that George, 56, and Amal used fertility treatments to conceive their twins, Ella and Alexander, the Suburbicon director insists that Amal's pregnancy was a surprise to them both and that her pregnancy with twins was an outright shock at Amal's ultrasound. ■ Fun-loving movie star Cuba Gooding Jr. surprised a group of beautiful bikini-wearing women when he joined them in a spa hot tub. Spies said that the American Crime Story: The People v. O.J. Simpson star was alone relaxing at the Great Jones Spa in Soho in NYC when he saw the women having a "girls' night" and decided to jump in their jacuzzi. Cuba was there alone and joined the girls night out. ■ Actor Orlando Bloom was seen at the annual Malibu Chilli Cook-off . Pharrell Williams was at Public Kitchen in NYC with his wife Helen Lasichanh, Warren Buffett was spotted celebrating his 87th birthday at Smith & Wollensky in NYC with a group of charity donors. Bill and Hillary Clinton were at at the 1770 House in East Hampton.

Agent to the rescue ■ Top UTA agent Jeremy Barber saved a woman from choking to death during a flight headed back to LA from the Telluride Film Festival. Barber, a partner in the agency with clients including Anthony Hopkins, Don Cheadle, Sigourney Weaver, Noah Baumbach and Julian Fellowes, was on the same Delta shuttle that's been transporting stars such as Christian Bale and Natalie Portman to and from the remote Colorado town. As Barber boarded the starry flight, he helped a woman stow her overhead bag but there was trouble later when the same woman, who was sitting directly in front of him, started choking, she was about to die. It was not good. People were freaking out, he really saved her life.

● Beyoncé

Birthday for cars ■ The year 1886 is considered to be the birth of the modern car. In that year, German inventor Carl Benz built a modern automobile called the Benz Patent-Motorwagen. ■ Sir Alec Guinness warned James Dean one week before he died not to get into his new Porsche 550 Spyder or "You'll be dead in it by this time next week." ■ There are currently more than one billion cars on the earth. ■ The United States has more cars than any other country in the world, at 300 million. China comes in a distant second, at 78 million. ■ Holding a remote car key to your head doubles its range because the human skull acts as an amplifier.

Mention my name ■ If you are considering a move to Los Angeles or just coming over for a holiday then I have got a special deal for you. We would love to see you at the Ramada Plaza Hotel and Suites, 8585 Santa Monica Boulevard, West Hollywood. I have secured a terrific holiday deal for readers of the Melbourne Observer and The Local Paper. Please mention 'Melbourne Observer' when you book and you will receive the 'Special Rate of the Day'. Please contact: Joanna at info@ramadaweho.com Happy Holidays, Gavin Wood

Richard’s big legal bills ● Marty Rhone ■ One of our great Aussie singers of the 60s and 70s with hits like Denim & Lace and A Mean Pair of Jeans has signed a worldwide personal management deal with CMP Management, a division of Countdown Motion Pictures. Marty is in the recording studio with famed record producer David Holman to record his new country album, which is slated for release early 2018. "We are very excited to have Marty on our celebrity roster," said CEO Gavin Wood in Hollywood yesterday. That's me folks and I have known Marty since 1974 when I used to play his songs on the radio, so we go right back to the relic rack. It is going to be an incredible journey.

www.gavinwood.us

■ Fitness guru Richard Simmons's lawsuit against the National Enquirer is officially over and Simmons is looking at a huge legal bill, we're told. Simmons sued the newspaper in May for claiming that he is transitioning into a woman. Over the weekend, LA Judge Gregory Keosian rubberstamped his decision to dismiss the enigmatic fitness guru's case, arguing that it's not defamatory to say someone is transgender. Simmons is now on the hook for the legal expenses of the National Enquirer, which sources say could run into "hundreds of thousands of dollars."


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 11

Observer Magazine

Photos from the past: Kinglake

● Kinglake picnic. Photo: Carl Hartmann

● Log bridge. Kinglake.

● Country Roads Board members. Heidelberg-Kinglake Rd. 1962. Photo: Eltham District Historical Society Collection.

● Departure of mails from Kinglake.

● Mason’s Falls. 1931.

● Fencing display at Kinglake. 1969. Photo: Bruce Postle

● Prospecting No 1 Creek. Photo: Eltham District Historical Society


Page 12 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Forgotten Fortunes

Unclaimed money ready to be collected ■ The website moneysmart.gov.au lists many items of unclaimed money in The Local Paper readership area, including:

Broadford

■ Broadford Amateur Swimming Club. $1110.29. Hamilton St, Broadford. ■ Broadford Scottish Festival Comm. $1253.32. 86 High St, Broadford.

Eildon

■ Eildon Cricket Club Inc. $1340.14. 44 Shaw Ave, Eildon. ■ Eildon Premier Small Town. $123.28. c/- Mrs J. Laws, Lot 18, Park Ave, Eildon. ■ Lake Eildon Holiday Boats Pty Ltd. $438.89.

Eltham

■ Eltham Central Park Athletic Club. $2506.29. Commonwealth Bank of Australia, 287 Lt Collins St, Melbourne. ■ Eltham Christian School. $879.98. Nyora Rd, Eltham. ■ Eltham College Superannuation Pty Ltd. $65.21. c/- Watson Wyatt Australia Pty Ltd, Level 4, 1 Collins St, Melbourne. ■ Eltham Coper Butterfly Fund. $2856.50. ■ Eltham Forum. $878.34. PO Box 151, Eltham. ■ Eltham North Adventure Park Inc. $4813.39. 46 Moola Pl, Eltha,. ■ Eltham North Progress Association. $722.40. 39 Hillcrest Rd, Eltham North. ■ Eltham Rate PayersAssociation. McLeod, J.A.; McDonald; Morant, A.; Granville. $23.25. Wairona, Brisbane St, Eltham. ■ Eltham Resource Centree. $1476.37. PO Box 290, Eltham. ■ North Eltham Medical Centre. $28.96.

Diamond Creek

■ Diamond Creek Florist (Vic.) Pty Ltd. $69.00. Level 5, 335 Flinders Lane, Melbourne. ■ Diamond Creek Football Club Ladies Auxiliary. $19.29.

Flowerdale ■ Flowerdale A/R Club. $8.46. Healesville

■ Bunjil Community Project Pty Ltd formerly Healesville Development Pty Ltd. $6666.66. Level 2, 215 Spring St. ■ Healesville & District Badminton Club. $651.02. c/- Mrs R. Carmody, Lot 11 Juliet Ave, Healesville. ■ Healesville & United Breweries (Vic.) Pty Ltd. $1155.34. ■ Healesville Gateway Festival and Arts Council Inc. $1050.63. PO Box 75, Healesville. ■ Healesville Indoor Bias Bowls Association. $148.04. c/- Mr Jim Fitzsimons, Lot 29 Centre Gr, Healesville. ■ Healesville Muncipal Band Inc. $874.78. PO Box 43, Healesville. ■ Healesville Ratepayers Depuattion. $528.87. Commonwealth Bank of Australia, 1 Bell St, Yarra Glen. ■ Ibrahim and Ibrahim ATF Ibrahim Family Trust T/As Healesville Mechanical Engineers, Alexi and Patsy. $899.93. I Merlin St, Healesville.

Hurstbridge

■ Hurstbridge Liquor Pty Ltd. $236.00. GPO Box 849, Melbourne. ■ Hurstbridge Playground. $622.18. 2 Lynbrae Ave, Hurstbridge. ■ Hurstbridge Youth Club. $31.23. c/- Greenhaurgh, Hillcrest Rd, Hurstbridge. ■ Hurstbridge Bakehouse (Hurstbridge) Pty Ltd. $120.00. 66 Edwardes St, Reservoir. ■ Hurstbridge Bakehouse (Hurstbridge) Pty Ltd. $120.00. 66 Edwardes St, Reservoir. ■ Hurstbridge Bakehouse (Hurstbridge) Pty Ltd. $80.00. 66 Edwardes St, Reservoir.

Kinglake

■ Kinglake Girl Guides Support Group. $784.41. c/- Mrs Kyn Smith, 1 Braeside Ave, Kinglake. ■ Lions Ladies Club of Kinglake Incorporated. $1383.33. Lot 8 Mount Slide Rd, Kinglake.

Lilydale

■ Awakening 2000 Lilydale. $3149.99. 105 Summit Rd, Lilydale. ■ Barry Plant Doherty RE Lilydale. $33.74. 88 Main St, Lilydale. ■ Lilydale Amateur Soccer Club. $16.93. ■ Lilydale Archery Club. $42.86. ■ Lilydale Brass Band $45.31. Brown St, Lilydale. ■ Lilydale Floorcoverings Pty Ltd. $38.00. PO Box 830, Berwick. ■ Lilydale Indsutrial Park Pty Ltd. $3518.17. ■ Lilydale Market Place Pharmore Pharmacy. $293.42 and $20.30. Shop T9, Lilydale Market Place Shopping Centre, 73 Hutchinson St, Lilydale. ■ Lilydale Market Stallgolders Association. $532.52 and $1156.28. c/Lilydale Market Pty Ltd, Lot 1 Hutchinson St, Lilydale. ■ Lilydale Squash and Racquetball Club. $608.18. Maroondah Hwy, Lilydale. ■ Montrose Panel Beating Lilydale. $77.71 and $58.28. PO Box 139, Lilydale. ■ OF Lilydale Shire School Assoc. Pre. $711.77. PO Box 80, Lilydale. ■ Ron Eisner and Sandra Eisner ATF Lilydale Specialist Medical Rooms P/L Superannuation Fund. $3052.90. PO Box 256, 20 Albert St, Blackburn. ■ Stockdale and Leggo Lilydale Pty Ltd. $782.92. 1252 High St, Malvern. ■ Woodland Wright Pty Ltd T/A Elders Real Estate Lilydale. $30.53 and $39.26. 164 Main Rd, Lilydale. ■ York On Lilydale Resort Pty Ltd. $991.50. c/- York On Lilydale Resort, Cnr York and Swansea Rds, Mount Evelyn.

Mansfield

■ Mansfield Motor Cycle Club. $923.98. M.A. Hodge, Goughs Bay Post Office. ■ Mansfield Playground. $1005.85. 27 Hunter St, Mansfield. ■ Mansfield Traders Association Inc. $1604.85. 61 High St, Mansfield.

Marysville

■ Marysville Football Club. $242.52. Mr L.W. Gianforte, Mt Margaret Rd, Buxton. ■ Marysville Grass Ski Club. $161.82. Hillcrest Farm, Buxton Rd, Marysville.

Murrindindi

■ Concerned Land Owners of Murrindindi. $1407.02. 40 Old Dixons Creek Rd, Toolangi. ■ Murrindindi Plumbing and Rural Supplies. $854.00. 46-48 William St, Murrindindi.

Rubicon

■ Upper Goulburn Landcare Group. $1009.91. RSD 139, Deloraine, Tas.

Seymour

■ Seymour and District Community Group Kindergym. $1732.17. 32 Redbank Rd, Seymour. ■ Seymour Agricultural and Pastoral Society Inc. $919.02. Lvl 1, Shop 9, Vervo Chambers, 78 Station St, Seymour. ■ Seymour Inline Hockey Club. $523.32. RMB 3080, Seymour. ■ Seymour Rafting Festival Committee Inc. $548.82. 30 High St, Seymour.

South Morang

■ South Morang Auskick. $1322.18. 9 Grimwade Ct, Epping. ■ South Morang Painting Services. $200.00.

St Andrews

■ St Andrews Progress Assoc. and Dev. $789.58. c/- L.F. Coulstock, Pitt St, Eltham.

Whittlesea

■ Dist. Assoc - Cs Fund Whittlesea. $1148.94. PO Box 121, Thomastown. ■ Nicholas Lauder (Whittlesea) Pty Ltd. $71.76. ■ Nicholas Lauder (Whittlesea) Pty Ltd. $41.59. 39 Church St, Whittlesea. ■ Nicholas Lauder (Whittlesea) Pty Ltd. $29.48. 39 Church St, Whittlesea. ■ Shire of Whittlesea Library. $116.09. 7 Pleasant Rd, Thomastown. ■ Whittlesea City Council Social Club No 2 Account. $736.17. ■ Whittlesea Compost Pty Ltd. $2.00. ■ Whittlesea Ethnic Communities Council Inc. $1128.65. 147-149 High St, Thomastown. ■ Whittlesea Junior Basketball Club. $1150.82. Unit 1, 99 Grenda Ave, Mill Park. ■ Whittlesea Shire Pre School Assoc. $513.84. 4 Finchley Ct, Epping. ■ Whittlesea Shire YouthAdvisory Committe. $399.35. Thomastown. ■ WhittleseaWelfare Review Working Group. $1545.61. Commonwealth Bank of Australia, 31 Plenty Rd, Bundoora.

Yarra Glen

■ Harris (Yarra Glen Pottery Dir A/C), David George. (Owner: Harris, David George; Harris, Sharon Merle). $9.18. U 101, 64 Macxquarie St, Newstead, Qld. ■ Harris (Yarra Glen Pottery Dir A/C), David George. (Owner: Harris, David George; Harris, Sharon Merle). $269.85. U 101, 64 Macxquarie St, Newstead, Qld. ■ Harris (Yarra Glen Pottery Dir A/C), David George. (Owner: Harris, David George; Harris, Sharon Merle). $9.18. U 101, 64 Macxquarie St, Newstead, Qld. ■ Harris (Yarra Glen Pottery Dir A/C), David George. (Owner: Harris, David George; Harris, Sharon

Merle). $269.85. U 101, 64 Macxquarie St, Newstead, Qld. ■ Yarra Glen Junior Club. $3.15. c/- ANZ Bank, Mooroolbark. ■ Yarra Glen Pottery Pty Ltd. $56.46. 64 Macquarie St, New Farm, Qld.

Yea

■ Yea Brand Pty Ltd. $11.76. PO Box 24, Yea, Vic. ■ Yea High School Co-Operative Ltd. $3760.54. Racecourse Rd, Yea. ■ Yea Indoor Netball Association Inc. $1553.13. PO Box 98, Yea, Vic 3717. ■ The website www.sro.vic. gov.au/unclaimed-money lists many items of unclaimed money in The Local Paper readership area, including:

Alexandra

■ Alexandra Authorised News. Attn. Geoff Hyland, 82-84 Grant St, Alexandra. $78.90. ■ Alexandra Drive Through Bottle Shop. 44 Downey St, Alexandra. $21.20. ■ Alexandra Garden Centre. 4 Dunn Ct, Alexandra. $21.20. ■ Alexandra Newspapers Pty Ltd. PO Box 5, Alexandra. $88.33. ■ Alexandra Newspapers Pty Ltd. 92 High St, Yea. $125.00. ■ Alexandra Radio Site. Halls Flat Rd, Alexandra. $125.00. ■ Aylan-Parker, Alexandra. 5 Sweeney Ct, Mansfield. $263.03. ■ Daniel Richard StrawAlexandra. 27 Riversdale Rd, Alexandra. $136.80. ■ Dean Maxwell and Debra Maxwell (Alexandra Phcy A/c). 77 Grant St, Alexandra. $61.50, $77.00, $61.50, $82.00, $61.50, $30.75, $307.50, $56.75, $26.00, $41.00, $41.00, $41.00, $102.50.

Broadford

■ Broadford Auto Salvage. 165 High St, Broadford. $39.60. ■ Broadford Car Sales. Depot. Cameron Pde, Broadford. $142.21. $125.00.

Coldstream

■ Choice Cafe and Pizza Coldstream. Shop 10, 4 North Gtwy, Coldstream. $125.00. ■ Coldstream Tennis Club Inc. Po Box 41, Coldstream. $28.66. ■ Coldstream Hills. 31 Maddens Lane, Coldstream. $51.60. ■ Gateway Milk Bar. Sh 1/4 North Gateway, Coldstream. $48.37. ■ IGA Everyday Coldstream. 670672 Maroondah Hwy, Coldstream. $57.94.

Diamond Creek

■ Mr Graham Allan Volk (Alexandra Volk). 15 Tom Roberts Glade, Diamond Creek. $70.00. ■ Diamond Creek Aquarium and Pet Supplies. Rear 23 Chute St, Diamond Creek. $125.00. ■ Diamond Creek Auto Parts. PO Box 234, Campbellfield. $45.54. ■ Diamond Creek Deli. Sh 11, 67 Hurstbridge Rd, Diamond Creek/15 Patterson St, Mill Park. $99.48. ■ Diamond Creek Drapes Pty Ltd. 27 Church Rd, Panton Hill. $24.20 and $199.20. ■ Diamond Creek Nominees. 23 Haven Lane, Diamond Creek. $41.68. ■ Diamond Creek Nominees, 9

River Gum Close/14-50 Queen St, Melbourne. $465.51, $169.71 and $147.74.

DixonsCreek

■ Dixons Creek Terracotta. 151Wills Rd, Dixons Creek. $209.12.

Eildon

■ Eildon Billabong. 19 Main St, Eildon. $125.00. ■ Eildon Caravan Park. Eildon Rd, Eildon. $28.45. ■ Eildon Foodworks. 18 Main St, Eildon. $111.29. ■ Food Rite. Main St, Eildon. $220.26. ■ LPO Eildon. Post Office, Main St, Eildon. $149.20. ■ The Eildon Hotel Unit Trust. Golden Trout, Riverside Dr, Eildon. $20.28.

Eltham

■ Mrs Alexandra Lehane. 5/87 Bible St, Eltham. $70.23. ■ Ms Alexandra Garnham. 35 Grove St, Eltham. $36.41. ■ Anytime Eltham Pty Ltd. off 3 20 Arthur St, Eltham. $125.00. ■ Ausfund Healthcare Eltham Properties P/L. Bolton St, Eltham. $125.10, $22.80. ■ Barry Plant Eltham. 198 Sherbourne Rd, Montmorency. $40.55. ■ CFA Eltham. John V. Jones. Unit 12, 39 41 Arthur St, Eltham. $24.29. ■ Community and Volunteers of Eltham. 43 Luck St, Eltham. $35.95. ■ Eltham Baptist Church. 43 Nyora Rd, Eltham. $190.93. ■ Eltham Chiropractic and Sport Injuries. Dr Sand. 856 Main Rd, Eltham. $77.82. ■ Eltham College. 1630 Main Rd, Research. $134.73. ■ Eltham East Primary School. Grove St, Eltham. $192.31. ■ Eltham Enterprises. 3/11 Nevin Pde, Viewbank/15 Withers Way, Eltham. $74.76 and $140.05. ■ Eltham Football Club. PO Box 828, Eltham. $63.29. ■ Eltham High School. Stadium, Withers Way, Eltham. $125.00. ■ Eltham Martial Academy. Fy 6, 1625 Main Rd, Research. $125.00. ■ Eltham Redbacks Football Club Inc. Soccer Club, Cedar Ave, Eltham North. $125.00. ■ Eltham Ridge Medical Cwentre. 284 Bolton St, Eltham. $98.24 and $53.58. ■ Eltham Tennis Club. 7 Youth Rd, Eltham. $105.45. ■ Eltham Veterinary Clinic. 644 Main Rd, Eltham. $51.51. ■ Eltham Woods Fish Shop. 167 Beard St, Eltham. $57.84. ■ Eltham College. Flr 2, Ten 2, 277 Flinders Lane, Melbourne. $46.90. ■ Eltham Consulting Service Pty Ltd. 126 Pitt St, Eltham. $42.75. ■ Eltham Developments Pty Ltd. 525 Mount Pleasant Rd, Research. $21.85, $64.61. ■ Eltham Enterprises. c/- Flannagans Real Estate, Flat 1, 1266 Bolton St, Eltham. $57.46. ■ Eltham Leisure Centre. Po Box 21, Eltham. $235.00. ■ Eltham Nominees P/L. 231 Union Rd, Ascot Vale. $80.19. ■ Eltham North Primary School. PO Box 110, Eltham. $38.18. ■ Eltham Pet Care Pty Ltd and Ochiba Pty Ltd. 1 Ingrams Rd, Eltham. $20.80. ■ Eltham Physiotheraphy. 1168 Main Rd, Eltham. $54.00. Turn To Page 55


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 13

Forgotten Fortunes ● From Page 10 ■ Eltham Plaza Pty Ltd. 525 Mt Pleasant Rd, Eltham. $50.00. ■ Eltham Pool & Spa. $74.00. ■ Eltham Tyre Centre P/L. Factory 6, 15 Brisbane St, Eltham. $187.32. ■ Eltham Wireglass Gallery. 559 Main Rd, Eltham. $39.00. ■ Eltham Wireglass Gallery. 559 Main Rd, Eltham. $39.00. ■ Fletchers Eltham Pty Ltd. Shop 1, 951 Main Rd, Eltham. $92.07. ■ Rare Bears Eltham. 10 Bridge St, Eltham. $52.94. ■ The Trustee for Adams Family Trust trading as Eltham Glass House. PO Box 47, Briar Hill. $292.96. ■ Mr Kevin Robert Homewood. 7 Ridgeview St, Eltham. $21.89, $72.43, $27.04, $27.63, $29.43.

nity Radio Inc. 12A Station St, Seymour. $24.10. ■ Seymour Shopping Centre Unit Trust. 2 Bishop St, Seymour. $125.00. ■ Seymour Auto Parts/Jason Meloury. Emily St, Seymour. $177.00. ■ Seymour Autoshop. 98 High St, Seymour. $21.20. ■ Seymour Model Dairy. 28 Anzac Ave, Seymour. $21.35. ■ Seymour Motor Cycles. Factory 3, 36 High St, Seymour. $276.05. ■ Seymour Tyre Service. 43A Emily St, Seymour. $468.03. ■ Brendan Homewood. PO Box 481, Seymour. $24.75. ■ Samuel Molesworth Jeffery. RMB 4360, Seymour. $20.91. $20.40. $22.95.

■ Flowerdale Community House Inc. 36 Silver Creek Rd, Flowerdale. $38.57.

■ 550 Kangaroo Ground-St Andrews Rd. Panton Hill. $27.80.

St Andrews

Flowerdale

Taggerty

Healesville

■ 362 Healesville-Yarra Glen Rd. 72 Williams Lane, Buxton. $54.74, $125.00. ■ Healesville and District Community Enterprises. Office: 205 Maroondah Hwy, Healesville. $20.19. ■ Healesville and District Hospital. 377 Maroondah Hwy, Healesville. $44.00. ■ Healesville Apartments. Lavender Farm, 100 Pine Ave, Badger Creek. $125.00. ■ Healesville Arts & Craft Supply. 41 Montana Pde, Croydon. $42.23. ■ Healesville Art Gallery. 11 Nigel Ct, Healesville. $144.30, $83.45, $177.25, $646.25.

Hurstbridge

■ Hurstbridge & District Medical. PO Box 599, Hurstbridge. $167.55. ■ Hurstbridge Authorised N. 800 Main Rd, Hurstbridge. $168.32. ■ Hurstbridge Homes Pty Ltd. 2 Brimar Cl, Diamond Creek. $140.50. ■ Hurstbridge Motor Body Repair. 35 Wattletree Rd, Hurstbridge. $50.88. ■ Hurstbridge Plumbing Pty Ltd. 4 Ronald Ave, South Morang. $92.75, $99.00. ■ Hurstbridge Post Cafe Pty Ltd. U17 Roger St, Doncaster East. $21.20, $199.20.

Kinglake

■ Kinglake Community Centre. Cnr Main Exton Rds, Kinglake Central. $1305.68. ■ Kinglake Kindergarten Inc. Child Care Centre, 1B Extons Rd, Kinglake Central. $326.50. ■ Kinglake MountainAutomotive. 3 Jorgenson Pde, Pheasant Creek. $21.20. ■ Kinglake West Primary. 1041 Whittlesea-Kinglake Rd, Kinglake West. $247.50, $379.21. ■ Kinglake Cricket Club. 15 James St, Kinglake. $76.85, $60.00. ■ Kylie Rabjones. 711 Extons Rd, Kinglake Central. $20.00. ■ United Kinglake. 8 KinglakeGlenburn Rd, Kinglake. $125.48. ■ Catherine Homewood. 13 Glenburn Rd, Glenburn. $1918.83.

Laurimar

■ Advantage Pharmacy Laurimar. 95 Hazel Glen Drive, Doreen. $156.00. ■ Laurimar Deli. U14, 95 Hazel Glen Dr, Doreen. $21.20. ■ Laurimar Holdings Pty Ltd. 3 Glensire Gv, Doreen. $33.43. ■ Laurimar Kebabs. Shop 2, Lot Z190, Hazel Glen Dr/13 Cambala Ave, Lalor. $764.44. ■ Lend Lease Communities (Laurimar Park) Pty Ltd. Level 2, The Gauge, 825 Bourke St, Victoria

■ Taggerty Mechanics Institute. Taggerty-Thornton Rd, Taggerty. $125.00.

Taylor Bay

■ Taylor Bay Holiday Retreat. 357 Taylor Bay Right Arm Rd, Taylor Bay. $125.00.

Wattle Glen

Harbour. $21.40.

Lilydale

■ Better Choice Lilydale 111. 469 Maroondah Hwy, Lilydale. $114.00. ■ Crown Hotel Lilydale. 267 Main St, Lilydale. $84.19. ■ Donut King Lilydale. Shop 33, 33 Hutchinson St, Lilydale. $125.00. ■ Ebem Pty Ltd. Lilydale Auto Superfund A/C. 26 Frenleigh Drive, Moorolbark. $32.60, $67.05, $55.05, $56.90. ■ Erotic Nights Lilydale. 158 Main St, Lilydale. $100.00. ■ Harrys Liquor Lilydale. Lilydale Marketplace S/C, Lot 1 Hutchison St, Lilydale. $59.96. ■ Lilydale Adventist Academy. PO Box 1, Lilydale. $211.42. ■ Lilydale Community Health Inc. Part Lot 2 Melba Ave, Lilydale. $70.25. ■ Lilydale Garden Centre. PO Box 257, Lilydale. $296.63. ■ Lilydale Industrial Park BCSP. 101 Beresford Rd, Lilydale. $125.00. ■ Lilydale Investments Pty Ltd. 155 Rundle St, Rockhampton, Qld. $51.75, $27.45. ■ Lilydale Medical Clinic. TNCY 3, 33 Hutchinson St,. Lilydale. $125.00. ■ Lilydale Nails and Beauty. 309 Main St, Lilydale. $125.00. ■ Lilydale Physiotherapy Centre. 127 Manchester Rd, Mooroolbark. $48.45, $150.64. ■ Lilydale Pony Club. PO Box 8, Melba Hwy, Coldstream. $29.06. ■ Lilydale Rail Trail Com. Inc. Station Rd, Warburton. $1184.03. ■ Lilydale Student Village. Locked Bag 218, Lilydale. $21.77. ■ Lilydale Village Lotto & News. Sh 5/343-345 Main St, Lilydale. $95.10. ■ Lilydale Clinic. 316 Main St, Lilydale. $34.00. $34.00. $34.00. $30.50. ■ Lilydale Garden. $192.91. $244.51. $244.52. $244.52. $133.27. ■ Lilydale Osteopathy. 6 Melview Dr, Ringwood North. $27.45. ■ Lilydale Radiological Centre. $25.00. ■ Methven Lilydale Pty Ltd. U1, 111 Main St, Lilydale. $205.91. ■ SIMS Lilydale Unit Trust. 343347 Main St, Lilydale. $613.04. ■ SVS Properties (Lilydale) P/L. 26 James St, Dandenong. $84.34.

$30.95. ■ Tobacco Station Lilydale. Sh 9, Olive Tree, Lilydale. $225.06. ■ Tokyo Sushi Kitchen (Lilydale) Pty Ltd. Food Court 3, 33 Hutchinson St, Lilydale. $125.00. ■ Ta Lilydale Fuel Stop & Car Wash. Cnr of 3 Anderson St & Hardy St, Lilydale. $80.05. ■ Yarra Glen & Lilydale Hunt Club. 28 Melba Hwy, Yering. $83.45. $125.00. $125.00. ■ Kevin Mansfield. 76 Alexandra Rd, Lilydale. $125.00.

Mansfield

■ Alfs Mansfield Clearance Centre. PO Box 279, Mansfield. $44.10. ■ Delatite Steel and Hardware Mansfield. Mt Buller Rd, Mansfield. $8.73. ■ Mansfield Autistic Centre. PO Box 622, Mansfield. $151.57. ■ Mansfield Dist. Hospital. 53 Highett St, Mansfield. $33.75. $22.70. $40.80. $113.90. $151.50. $25.05. $66.55. $21.15. $34.60. $28.70. $76.65. ■ Mansfield Lotto. 67 High St, Mansfield. $48.72. ■ Mansfield Mt Buller Bus Lines P/L. 137 High St, Mansfield. $42.43. ■ Mansfield Naturopathic Centre. Shop 9B, 14 High St, Mansfield. $125.00. ■ Mansfield Retravision. 54-56 High St, Mansfield. $23.96. ■ Mansfield Shire Council. Highett St, Mansfield. $90.20. ■ Mansfield Bakery. 31 High St, Mansfield. $1429.00. ■ Mansfield District Hospital. Highett St, Mansfield. $78.00. ■ Mansfield Shire Council. Private Box 1000, Mansfield. $101.76. ■ Mansfield Sign & Print. 3 Reardon Lane, Mansfield. $29.98.

Mernda

■ Mernda Estate. Waterview Dr. Irrigation Cnr Homebush, Mernda. $137.88. ■ Mr Gabriel Daly. 25 Hunters Lane, Mernda. $212.46. ■ Mernda Football Club. 15 Beale St, Mernda. $488.00. ■ Mernda Primary School. 17 Johnsons Rd, Mernda. $20.10.

Merton

■ Andrew Buxton. 608 MertonStrathbogie Rd, Merton. $125.00.

Molesworth

■ Molesworth Caravan Park. Goulburn Valley Hwy, Molesworth. $125.00. ■ Molesworth Hall. PO Box 30, Molesworth. $201.71.

Murrindindi

■ Murrindindi Shire Council. PO Box 138, Alexandra. $113.30. $122.09. ■ Murrindindi Shire Council. U5, 4 Sedgwick St, Marysville. $64.33. ■ Murrindindi Station Pastoral Company. Murrindindi Station, Melba Hwy, Yea. $125.00.

Pheasant Creek

■ Pheasant Creek N/A & Gen. 1 Pitman St, Craigieburn. $307.46. ■ Pheasant Creek News & Conv. Shop. 884 Main Rd, Pheasant Creek. $59.07.

Seymour

■ BP Seymour. 58 Anzac Ave, Seymour. $110.05. ■ Rural Housing Network. 34 O’Sullivan Rd, Seymour. $218.80. ■ Seymour Asian Fast Food. Shop 7, The Mall, Seymour. $125.00. ■ Seymour Assembly of God Inc. 55 Anzac Ave, Seymour. $32.57. ■ Seymour Caravans. 25 Emily St, Seymour. $34.81. ■ Seymour Central Unit Trust. 18 Tallarook St, Seymour. $125.00. ■ Seymour Central Vets. 63 Emily St, Seymour. $125.00. ■ Seymour Christian School. 52 Tallarook St, Seymour. $70.37. ■ Seymour Cycles. 78 Station St, Seymour. $70.96. ■ Seymour District Locksmiths. PO Box 520, Seymour. $39.64. ■ Seymour Medical Imaging. PO Box 487, Brettoneux St, Seymour. $92.75. ■ Seymour Noodles. Shop 2, Seymour Central, 18 Tallarook St, Seymour. $125.00. ■ Seymour Pathways. 55 Anzac Ave, Seymour. $125.00. ■ Seymour Primary School. 6 Loco St, Seymour. $21.20. ■ Seymour Printers. 12 Station St, Seymour. $125.00. ■ Seymour Puckapunyal Commu-

■ Wattle Glen Homes and Extensions. 7A Law St, Briar Hill. $223.78.

Whittlesea

■ Caltex Starmart Whittlesea. Cnr Beech & Forest Sts, Whittlesea. $30.26. $34.76. $139.82. ■ City of Whittlesea. Barry Rd Community Activity Centre. Thomastown. $82.24. ■ City of Whittlesea. Locked Bag 1, Bundoora. $1037.55. $75.95. ■ City of Whittlesea. 110A Hazel Glen Dr, Doreen. $25.99. ■ Diamond Valley Whittlesea Housing Co-Operative. PO Box 322, Bundoora. $43.13. ■ Helen L. Scott & William J. Scott (Whittlesea Pharmacy A/C). 69 Church St, Whittlesea. $29.96. ■ Yan Yean Developments. 1 Oakbank Bvd, Whittlesea. $27.89. ■ T. Pangbourne. Flat 19 Macmeikan St, Whittlesea. $119.65. ■ Roland Homewood. 4 Lorikeet Cres, Whittlesea. $100.39.

Yarra Glen

■ Birchwood of Yarra Glen. 109 Mount View Pde, Croydon. $26.86. ■ J.R. Lithgow. Grand Hotel Yarra Glen. c/- AON Risk Services, L4, 440 Collins St, Melbourne. $494.94. ■ The Yarra Glen Cafe and Store. 7/36 Bell St, Yarra Glen. $114.28. ■ United Yarra Glen. 6 Bell St, Yarra Glen. $123.94. $96.30. ■ Yarra Glen Child Care. 43A Forest St, Yarra Glen. $24.20.

Yea

■ Shire of Yea. $89.27. ■ Yea Chinese Restaurant and Take-Away. 34 High St, Yea. $149.48. ■ Yea Foodworks. 40-42 High St, Yea. $21.26. $288.99. ■ Yea JFC. 31 Smith St, Yea. $35.00. ■ Yea Peppercorn Hotel. Station Hotel. 21 Station St, Yea. $142.89. ■ Yea Urban Fire Brigade. c/- 2 Marshbank St, Yea. $100.00. $51.65. ■ Yea Valley Vineayrds. 980 Murrindindi Rd, Murrindindi. $43.37. ■ Eric Arthur Seymour Jowett. Willawong, RMB 4050, Yea. $116.15.

Yering

■ Yering Farm Wines Pty Ltd. 19 St Huberts Rd, Yering. $86.03. $125.00.


Page 14 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Observer Magazine

■ Jack Benny was one of the world's most loved comedians during the 20th Century. He developed a wonderful character on radio, television and also in films. He used running gags throughout his showbusiness career with superb comic timing - the ‘penny pinching’ miser, the vain playboy and the ‘would be’ violinist. Benjamin Kubelsky was born in 1894 in Chicago, Illinois, to Jewish parents who had emigrated from Europe. By the time he was 17 he was playing his violin in local vaudeville shows. He joined the Navy during World War I and returned to showbusiness after the war ended. In 1921, he was working as a comedian and began to use the stage name of Jack Benny. Around this time, he met Sadie Marks who became a part of his stage act and they married in 1927. The couple adopted a daughter. Sadie Marks later used the stage name of Mary Livingston. Jack was cast in one of the early talking films, The Hollywood Revue of 1929, which featured many of the popular film stars including Laurel and Hardy. His next film was a flop and Jack was released from his film contract. In 1932 Jack Benny began his radio show which was to become one of the most popular programs in America. There were a group of regular performers

Whatever Happened To ... Jack Benny

By Kevin Trask of 3AW and 96.5 Inner FM

including his wife Mary Livingston, Eddie Rochester Anderson, Phil Harris and Dennis Day. Jack used the popular song Love in Bloom as his theme music for the radio show. A nother running gag was his age - he celebrated his 39th birthday 41 times. His television series began in 1950 and ran for 15 years. He got one of the longest laughs in history in the sketch where he is confronted by a robber with a pistol who says, "Your Money or your life?" - the laughs went on and on until the robber asked, "Well?"- another period of laughter till Jack replied, "I'm thinking it over!" His films included, Buck Benny Rides Again, Charlie's Aunt, Love Thy Neighbour, George

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

George suggested to Jack that they go to Jeanette Mc Donald's opening night and said, "Wouldn't it be funny if, when Miss McDonald began to sing we both burst out laughing." Jack agreed to go along with the joke. They were seated in the front row on opening night and when Jeanette McDonald began to sing Jack broke into hysterical laughter whilst the deadpanned George Burns sat there smoking his cigar, shrugging his shoulders and telling nearby audience members, "I don't know what's wrong with him." Jack Benny toured Australia in 1974 with Johnny O'Keefe and appeared at the Comedy Theatre. Diana was there when Jack blew out the candles on his 80th birthday cake. At the time of his death in 1974 he was going to make the film The Sunshine Boys and the role was taken over by his longtime friend George Burns. The mean character was not true, this wonderful comedian was very generous and he is sadly missed. ● Jack Benny Kevin Trask Kevin can be heard on radio Washington Slept Here and the film that he always "sent up" in comedy sketches - The Horn The Time Tunnel - on Remember When Sundays at 9.10pm on 3AW Blows at Midnight. That's Entertainment - 96.5FM When he began to do his Las Vegas stage Sundays at 12 Noon shows my cousin Diana Trask worked with him. Diana recalls in her autobiography that Jack 96.5FM is streaming on the internet. loved the comedian George Burns and he would To listen, go to www.innerfm.org.au and follow the prompts. fall down on the ground laughing at his jokes.

Black Rider: The Casting of The Magic Bullets

■ Victorian Opera and Malthouse Theatre team with Meow Meow, Paul Capsis, Le Gateau Chocolat and Kanen Breen for the Australian premiere of Black Rider: The Casting Of The Magic Bullets a journey through a vivid theatrical landscape that is part gothic, part opera, and all dance with the devil. Based on the German folktale that inspired Carl Maria von Weber’s 19th century opera Der Freischutz, Black Rider is the tale of Wilhelm, an intellectual young clerk who must learn to hunt in order to marry his true love, a woodsman’s daughter. He strikes a Faustian pact with the devil for magic bullets that never miss their mark, but in this world, nothing is what it seems: the devil sings, animals talk, the walls become woods and bullets have a mind of their own. Hallucinatory writer William S. Burroughs penned the script, musical anarchist Tom Waits wrote the songs and together with experimental director Robert Wilson, this production was created. Black Rider is a tour-de-force that pulls the audience into the dark and decadent depths of the underworld. The production unites Malthouse Theatre’sArtistic Director Matthew Lutton (Away) with Victorian Opera’s Head of Music, Phoebe Briggs (The Sleeping Beauty). Venue: Merlyn Theatre, The Coopers Malthouse Previews: Friday Sept. 15, Saturday Sept. 16, Monday Sept. 18, Tuesday Sept. 19 Opening Night: Wednesday September 20 Times: 6.30pm (Monday and Tuesday), 7.30pm (Wednesday to Saturday), 3pm (Saturday matinees) and 5pm (Sunday) Tickets: $35 - $69 Bookings: boxoffice@malthouse theatre.com.au or 9685 5111 - Cheryl Threadgold

Theatre

With Cheryl Threadgold

Eliza Winstanley, in her new play, Miss W Treads. Told through the eyes of a young, contemporary researcher, Imogene (Ruby Johnston), the drama flashes back and forth from contemporary Australia to its Victorian past and occasionally defies time entirely with both protagonists meeting in an alternative universe. Written as part of a PhD project on the life of Winstanley, Woollard skilfully includes reference to the researcher’s dilemma: what to do about the gaps in knowledge. As Imogene tells us, ‘I’ve been down this blind alley before’. The intrepid Eliza (Fanny Hanusin) - ambitious and determined – with husband, Henry O’Flaherty (Nicholas Kato) in tow, became the first Australiantrained performer to achieve international success. Having had success on the Sydney stage in the 1840s, she went on to perform in New York and London, treading the boards in Drury Lane and performing for Queen Victoria. Why then, after such success, did she wind up back in Sydney worked to death in a dye works? “Don’t make me abject!” Eliza implores of her would-be biographer, ‘allow me to be queen of this little kingdom.’ Peter Farnan’s sound design and Bronwyn Pringle’s lighting add an ex■ Writer and director, Jane tra element of lilting, haunting atmoWoollard, has delved deep into the sphere to the production. Funny and early history of colonial Australia to moving, there’s also a sword fight reveal the fascinating early feminist thrown in. performer and writer of melodrama, “I have constructed her,” Imogene

Miss W Treads

tells the audience, “I have pulled her out of the cracks into the light.” About time. Performance Season: Until September 17 Times: Wed 6.30pm, Thu, Fri, Sat 7.30pm , Sun 4pm Venue: La Mama Theatre 205 Faraday St, Carlton Tickets: Full $25 Concession $15 Bookings: 9347 6142 or www. lamama.com.au - Review by Kathryn Keeble

Lauren Bok: A Bok in Progress

■ Lauren Bok presents her second solo show Lauren Bok: A Bok in Progress from September 13 – 16 at the Metropolitan Hotel, North Melbourne Off the back of her highly successful first solo show, Lauren Bok returns to Melbourne Fringe fresh from Edinburgh Fringe with a whole new hour. Content warnings include mime (Yes, mime), drums (better tell the venue), dance (write APRA form), some audience interaction (hope that doesn’t throw people off, but it’s the fringe, so, deal with it), and hopefully, jokes (write jokes.) Lauren Bok is a Melbourne-based comedian, writer and performer, with a bright, witty and physical style. She wrote for SBS Comedy, appears on Channel 31 a lot and performs yearround on festival circuits around the world. Her debut show Is That A Burrito In Your Pocket Or Are You Just Happy You Have A Burrito, collected a Best Emerging Artist (Weekly) Award at Adelaide Fringe 2016 and has just finished a successful Edinburgh Fringe season at the Gilded Balloon. But all that means nothing now because she needs to make a new show for the Melbourne Fringe Festiva.. Performance details: September 13 – 16 at 8.30pm Venue: Metropolitan Hotel, North Melbourne All tickets: $14.50 Bookings: 9660 9666. Melbourne fringe.com.au - Cheryl Threadgold

OK. With John O’Keefe Moving to Victoria

■ Perth radio station Hit 92.9 has lost two of their top guns in Will McMahon and Woody Whitelaw, both moving to World's Most Liveable City (that's Melbourne in case you have been living under a mushroom) to make up an on-air team on KIIS FM.

Heart of St Kilda

■ Leo Sayer and Courtney Barnett are headlining the annual Heart of St Kilda concert on November 28. All profits go to the most worthwhile organization Sacret Heart Mission which prepares 160,000 meals a year for the needy .The line-up of support acts is unreal. A rocking good night with tickets at Ticketmaster.

Robbie Williams is back

■ He's back again. Robbie Williams will be back in Australia next year for a full-on concert at Mount Duneed Estate. The set date is March 3 for A Day on the Green. Robbie, the one time member of Take That boy band, has sold 77 million albums since going solo. Tickets to the gig start at $110 rising to $260 .

Mick pushes for AC DC power

■ Uproar at Triple M because station management have disconnected the power to the AC DC pimball machine located in station foyer. Mick Molloy is taking up the cause on behalf of staff to have the power reinstated. “It's part of Triple M 's culture,” said Mick in a strongly worded statement.

Especially for Rev Heads

■ Fox Sports has announced a pop-up channel to broadcast 24/7 highlights and live coverage of the 2017 Bathurst 1000. Season kicks off October 2, running through to live coverage on the weekend.. Sit back, veg out and drink in all that Bathhurst has to offer.

No date for Bon Scott ep.

■ At a date yet to be set Seven will screen The Story of Bon Scott, scripted and produced by the same company who have produced Michael Hutchence - the Last Rockstar. The Bon Scott mini-epic promises to be a ripper with a lot of home truths and never seen before film clips of Bon as frontman of AC DC.

Less work for Hamish

■ In the world of sport Hamish McLachlan is a workaholic, and whatever he does he performs to perfection with authority and a smile. Pressure has seen Hamish bail out of future participation in SEN breakfast program in order to devote more effort to his 'real' day job - Channel 7 .

$1 million airtime from SBS

■ SBS has awarded $ 1 million in airtime to Surf Life Saving Australia which came out tops in SBS’s annual Diversity Works Challenge . On air spots and social media will be seen in the lead up to summer . - John O’Keefe


Melbourne Obser ver - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 15

Observer Classic Books

Adventures of Huckleberry Finn I slipped up to bed, feeling ruther blue, on accounts of the thing playing out that way after I had took so much trouble and run so much resk about it. Says I, if it could stay where it is, all right; because when we get down the river a hundred mile or two I could write back to Mary Jane, and she could dig him up again and get it; but that ain’t the thing that’s going to happen; the thing that’s going to happen is, the money ’ll be found when they come to screw on the lid. Then the king ’ll get it again, and it ’ll be a long day before he gives anybody another chance to smouch it from him. Of course I WANTED to slide down and get it out of there, but I dasn’t try it. Every minute it was getting earlier now, and pretty soon some of them watchers would begin to stir, and I might get catched — catched with six thousand dollars in my hands that nobody hadn’t hired me to take care of. I don’t wish to be mixed up in no such business as that, I says to myself. When I got down stairs in the morning the parlor was shut up, and the watchers was gone. There warn’t nobody around but the family and the widow Bartley and our tribe. I watched their faces to see if anything had been happening, but I couldn’t tell. Towards the middle of the day the undertaker come with his man, and they set the coffin in the middle of the room on a couple of chairs, and then set all our chairs in rows, and borrowed more from the neighbors till the hall and the parlor and the dining-room was full. I see the coffin lid was the way it was before, but I dasn’t go to look in under it, with folks around. Then the people begun to flock in, and the beats and the girls took seats in the front row at the head of the coffin, and for a half an hour the people filed around slow, in single rank, and looked down at the dead man’s face a minute, and some dropped in a tear, and it was all very still and solemn, only the girls and the beats holding handkerchiefs to their eyes and keeping their heads bent, and sobbing a little. There warn’t no other sound but the scraping of the feet on the floor and blowing noses — because people always blows them more at a funeral than they do at other places except church. When the place was packed full the undertaker he slid around in his black gloves with his softy soothering ways, putting on the last touches, and getting people and things all ship-shape and comfortable, and making no more sound than a cat. He never spoke; he moved people around, he squeezed in late ones, he opened up passageways, and done it with nods, and signs with his hands. Then he took his place over against the wall. He was the softest, glidingest, stealthiest man I ever see; and there warn’t no more smile to him than there is to a ham. They had borrowed a melodeum — a sick one; and when everything was ready a young woman set down and worked it, and it was pretty skreeky and colicky, and everybody joined in and sung, and Peter was the only one that had a good thing, according to my notion. Then the Reverend Hobson opened up, slow and solemn, and begun to talk; and straight off the most outrageous row busted out in the cellar a body ever heard; it was only one dog, but he made a most powerful racket, and he kept it up right along; the parson he had to stand there, over the coffin, and wait — you couldn’t hear yourself think. It was right down awkward, and nobody didn’t seem to know what to do. But pretty soon they see that longlegged undertaker make a sign to the preacher as much as to say, “Don’t you worry — just depend on me.” Then he stooped down and begun to glide along the wall, just his shoulders showing over the people’s heads. So he glided along, and the powwow and racket getting more and more outrageous all the time; and at last, when he had gone around two sides of the room, he disappears down cellar. Then in about two seconds we heard a whack, and the dog he finished up with a most amazing howl or two, and then everything was dead still, and the parson begun his solemn talk where he left off. In a minute or two here comes this undertaker’s back and shoulders gliding along the wall again; and so he glided and glided around three sides of the room, and then rose up, and shaded his mouth with his hands, and stretched his neck out to

r

e rv se US N Ob N IO BO CT SE

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

be back home in a week or two. The thing made a big stir in the town, too, and a good many come out flatfooted and said it was scandalous to separate the mother and the children that way. It injured the frauds some; but the old fool he bulled right along, spite of all the duke could say or do, and I tell you the duke was powerful uneasy. Next day was auction day. About broad day in the morning the king and the duke come up in the garret and woke me up, and I see by their look that there was trouble. The king says: “Was you in my room night before last?” “No, your majesty”— which was the way I always called him when nobody but our gang warn’t around. “Was you in there yisterday er last night?” “No, your majesty.” “Honor bright, now — no lies.” “Honor bright, your majesty, I’m telling you the truth. I hain’t been a-near your room since Miss Mary Jane took you and the duke and showed it to you.” The duke says: “Have you seen anybody else go in there?” “No, your grace, not as I remember, I believe.” “Stop and think.” I studied awhile and see my chance; then I says: “Well, I see the niggers go in there several times.” Both of them gave a little jump, and looked like they hadn’t ever expected it, and then like they HAD. Then the duke says: “What, all of them?” “No — leastways, not all at once — that is, I don’t think I ever see them all come OUT at once but just one time.” “Hello! When was that?” “It was the day we had the funeral. In the morning. It warn’t early, because I overslept. I was just starting down the ladder, and I see them.” “Well, go on, GO on! What did they do? How’d they act?” “They didn’t do nothing. And they didn’t act anyway much, as fur as I see. They tiptoed away; so I seen, easy enough, that they’d shoved in there to do up your majesty’s room, or something, s’posing you was up; and found you WARN’T up, and so they was hoping to slide out of the way of trouble without waking you up, if they hadn’t already waked you up.” “Great guns, THIS is a go!” says the king; and both of them looked pretty sick and tolerable Mark Twain silly. They stood there a-thinking and scratching wards the preacher, over the people’s heads, the estate right away and leave for home. He their heads a minute, and the duke he bust into a and says, in a kind of a coarse whisper, “HE was very sorry he was so pushed, and so was kind of a little raspy chuckle, and says: HAD A RAT!” Then he drooped down and everybody; they wished he could stay longer, “It does beat all how neat the niggers played glided along the wall again to his place. You but they said they could see it couldn’t be done. their hand. They let on to be SORRY they was could see it was a great satisfaction to the people, And he said of course him and William would going out of this region! And I believed they because naturally they wanted to know. A little take the girls home with them; and that pleased WAS sorry, and so did you, and so did everything like that don’t cost nothing, and it’s just the everybody too, because then the girls would be body. Don’t ever tell ME any more that a nigger little things that makes a man to be looked up to well fixed and amongst their own relations; and ain’t got any histrionic talent. Why, the way they and liked. There warn’t no more popular man it pleased the girls, too — tickled them so they played that thing it would fool ANYBODY. In in town than what that undertaker was. clean forgot they ever had a trouble in the world; my opinion, there’s a fortune in ’em. If I had Well, the funeral sermon was very good, but and told him to sell out as quick as he wanted to, capital and a theater, I wouldn’t want a better pison long and tiresome; and then the king he they would be ready. Them poor things was that lay-out than that — and here we’ve gone and shoved in and got off some of his usual rubbage, glad and happy it made my heart ache to see sold ’em for a song. Yes, and ain’t privileged to and at last the job was through, and the under- them getting fooled and lied to so, but I didn’t sing the song yet. Say, where IS that song — taker begun to sneak up on the coffin with his see no safe way for me to chip in and change that draft?” screw-driver. I was in a sweat then, and watched the general tune. “In the bank for to be collected. Where WOULD him pretty keen. But he never meddled at all; Well, blamed if the king didn’t bill the house and it be?” just slid the lid along as soft as mush, and the niggers and all the property for auction “Well, THAT’S all right then, thank goodness.” screwed it down tight and fast. So there I was! I straight off — sale two days after the funeral; Says I, kind of timid-like: didn’t know whether the money was in there or but anybody could buy private beforehand if they “Is something gone wrong?” not. So, says I, s’pose somebody has hogged wanted to. The king whirls on me and rips out: that bag on the sly? — now how do I know So the next day after the funeral, along about “None o’ your business! You keep your head whether to write to Mary Jane or not? S’pose noon-time, the girls’ joy got the first jolt. A couple shet, and mind y’r own affairs — if you got any. she dug him up and didn’t find nothing, what of nigger traders come along, and the king sold Long as you’re in this town don’t you forgit would she think of me? Blame it, I says, I might them the niggers reasonable, for three-day drafts THAT— you hear?” Then he says to the duke, get hunted up and jailed; I’d better lay low and as they called it, and away they went, the two “We got to jest swaller it and say noth’n’: mum’s keep dark, and not write at all; the thing’s awful sons up the river to Memphis, and their mother the word for US.” mixed now; trying to better it, I’ve worsened it a down the river to Orleans. I thought them poor As they was starting down the ladder the duke hundred times, and I wish to goodness I’d just girls and them niggers would break their hearts he chuckles again, and says: let it alone, dad fetch the whole business! for grief; they cried around each other, and took “Quick sales AND small profits! It’s a good busiThey buried him, and we come back home, on so it most made me down sick to see it. The ness — yes.” and I went to watching faces again — I couldn’t girls said they hadn’t ever dreamed of seeing The king snarls around on him and says: help it, and I couldn’t rest easy. But nothing come the family separated or sold away from the town. “I was trying to do for the best in sellin’ ’em out of it; the faces didn’t tell me nothing. I can’t ever get it out of my memory, the sight of so quick. If the profits has turned out to be none, The king he visited around in the evening, and them poor miserable girls and niggers hanging lackin’ considable, and none to carry, is it my sweetened everybody up, and made himself around each other’s necks and crying; and I fault any more’n it’s yourn?” ever so friendly; and he give out the idea that reckon I couldn’t a stood it all, but would a had “Well, THEY’D be in this house yet and we his congregation over in England would be in a to bust out and tell on our gang if I hadn’t knowed WOULDN’T if I could a got my advice listened sweat about him, so he must hurry and settle up the sale warn’t no account and the niggers would to.” Continued on Page 16


Page 16 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Observer Classic Books From Page 15 The king sassed back as much as was safe for him, and then swapped around and lit into ME again. He give me down the banks for not coming and TELLING him I see the niggers come out of his room acting that way — said any fool would a KNOWED something was up.And then waltzed in and cussed HIMSELF awhile, and said it all come of him not laying late and taking his natural rest that morning, and he’d be blamed if he’d ever do it again. So they went off ajawing; and I felt dreadful glad I’d worked it all off on to the niggers, and yet hadn’t done the niggers no harm by it. Chapter XXVIII. BY and by it was getting-up time. So I come down the ladder and started for down-stairs; but as I come to the girls’ room the door was open, and I see Mary Jane setting by her old hair trunk, which was open and she’d been packing things in it — getting ready to go to England. But she had stopped now with a folded gown in her lap, and had her face in her hands, crying. I felt awful bad to see it; of course anybody would. I went in there and says: “Miss Mary Jane, you can’t a-bear to see people in trouble, and I can’t — most always. Tell me about it.” So she done it. And it was the niggers — I just expected it. She said the beautiful trip to England was most about spoiled for her; she didn’t know HOW she was ever going to be happy there, knowing the mother and the children warn’t ever going to see each other no more — and then busted out bitterer than ever, and flung up her hands, and says: “Oh, dear, dear, to think they ain’t EVER going to see each other any more!” “But they WILL— and inside of two weeks — and I KNOW it!” says I. Laws, it was out before I could think! And before I could budge she throws her arms around my neck and told me to say it AGAIN, say it AGAIN, say it AGAIN! I see I had spoke too sudden and said too much, and was in a close place. I asked her to let me think a minute; and she set there, very impatient and excited and handsome, but looking kind of happy and eased-up, like a person that’s had a tooth pulled out. So I went to studying it out. I says to myself, I reckon a body that ups and tells the truth when he is in a tight place is taking considerable many resks, though I ain’t had no experience, and can’t say for certain; but it looks so to me, anyway; and yet here’s a case where I’m blest if it don’t look to me like the truth is better and actuly SAFER than a lie. I must lay it by in my mind, and think it over some time or other, it’s so kind of strange and unregular. I never see nothing like it. Well, I says to myself at last, I’m a-going to chance it; I’ll up and tell the truth this time, though it does seem most like setting down on a kag of powder and touching it off just to see where you’ll go to. Then I says: “Miss Mary Jane, is there any place out of town a little ways where you could go and stay three or four days?” “Yes; Mr. Lothrop’s. Why?” “Never mind why yet. If I’ll tell you how I know the niggers will see each other again inside of two weeks — here in this house — and PROVE how I know it — will you go to Mr. Lothrop’s and stay four days?” “Four days!” she says; “I’ll stay a year!” “All right,” I says, “I don’t want nothing more out of YOU than just your word — I druther have it than another man’s kiss-the-Bible.” She smiled and reddened up very sweet, and I says, “If you don’t mind it, I’ll shut the door — and bolt it.” Then I come back and set down again, and says: “Don’t you holler. Just set still and take it like a man. I got to tell the truth, and you want to brace up, Miss Mary, because it’s a bad kind, and going to be hard to take, but there ain’t no help for it. These uncles of yourn ain’t no uncles at all; they’re a couple of frauds — regular dead-beats. There, now we’re over the worst of it, you can stand the rest middling easy.” It jolted her up like everything, of course; but I was over the shoal water now, so I went right along, her eyes a-blazing higher and higher all the time, and told her every blame thing, from where we first struck that young fool going up to the steamboat, clear through to where she flung herself on to the king’s breast at the front door and he kissed her sixteen or seventeen times — and then up she jumps, with her face afire like sunset, and says: “The brute! Come, don’t waste a minute — not

a SECOND— we’ll have them tarred and feathered, and flung in the river!” Says I: “Cert’nly. But do you mean BEFORE you go to Mr. Lothrop’s, or —” “Oh,” she says, “what am I THINKING about!” she says, and set right down again. “Don’t mind what I said — please don’t — you WON’T, now, WILLyou?” Laying her silky hand on mine in that kind of a way that I said I would die first. “I never thought, I was so stirred up,” she says; “now go on, and I won’t do so any more. You tell me what to do, and whatever you say I’ll do it.” “Well,” I says, “it’s a rough gang, them two frauds, and I’m fixed so I got to travel with them a while longer, whether I want to or not — I druther not tell you why; and if you was to blow on them this town would get me out of their claws, and I’d be all right; but there’d be another person that you don’t know about who’d be in big trouble. Well, we got to save HIM, hain’t we? Of course. Well, then, we won’t blow on them.” Saying them words put a good idea in my head. I see how maybe I could get me and Jim rid of the frauds; get them jailed here, and then leave. But I didn’t want to run the raft in the daytime without anybody aboard to answer questions but me; so I didn’t want the plan to begin working till pretty late to-night. I says: “Miss Mary Jane, I’ll tell you what we’ll do, and you won’t have to stay at Mr. Lothrop’s so long, nuther. How fur is it?” “A little short of four miles — right out in the country, back here.” “Well, that ’ll answer. Now you go along out there, and lay low till nine or half-past to-night, and then get them to fetch you home again — tell them you’ve thought of something. If you get here before eleven put a candle in this window, and if I don’t turn up wait TILL eleven, and THEN if I don’t turn up it means I’m gone, and out of the way, and safe. Then you come out and spread the news around, and get these beats jailed.” “Good,” she says, “I’ll do it.” “And if it just happens so that I don’t get away, but get took up along with them, you must up and say I told you the whole thing beforehand, and you must stand by me all you can.” “Stand by you! indeed I will. They sha’n’t touch a hair of your head!” she says, and I see her nostrils spread and her eyes snap when she said it, too. “If I get away I sha’n’t be here,” I says, “to prove these rapscallions ain’t your uncles, and I couldn’t do it if I WAS here. I could swear they was beats and bummers, that’s all, though that’s worth something. Well, there’s others can do that better than what I can, and they’re people that ain’t going to be doubted as quick as I’d be. I’ll tell you how to find them. Gimme a pencil and a piece of paper. There —’Royal Nonesuch, Bricksville.’ Put it away, and don’t lose it. When the court wants to find out something about these two, let them send up to Bricksville and say they’ve got the men that played the Royal Nonesuch, and ask for some witnesses — why, you’ll have that entire town down here before you can hardly wink, Miss Mary. And they’ll come a-biling, too.” I judged we had got everything fixed about right now. So I says: “Just let the auction go right along, and don’t worry. Nobody don’t have to pay for the things they buy till a whole day after the auction on accounts of the short notice, and they ain’t going out of this till they get that money; and the way we’ve fixed it the sale ain’t going to count, and they ain’t going to get no money. It’s just like the way it was with the niggers — it warn’t no sale, and the niggers will be back before long. Why, they can’t collect the money for the NIGGERS yet — they’re in the worst kind of a fix, Miss Mary.” “Well,” she says, “I’ll run down to breakfast now, and then I’ll start straight for Mr. Lothrop’s.” “’Deed, THAT ain’t the ticket, Miss Mary Jane,” I says, “by no manner of means; go BEFORE breakfast.” “Why?” “What did you reckon I wanted you to go at all for, Miss Mary?” “Well, I never thought — and come to think, I don’t know. What was it?” “Why, it’s because you ain’t one of these leatherface people. I don’t want no better book than what your face is. A body can set down and read it off like coarse print. Do you reckon you can

go and face your uncles when they come to kiss you good-morning, and never —” “There, there, don’t! Yes, I’ll go before breakfast — I’ll be glad to. And leave my sisters with them?” “Yes; never mind about them. They’ve got to stand it yet a while. They might suspicion something if all of you was to go. I don’t want you to see them, nor your sisters, nor nobody in this town; if a neighbor was to ask how is your uncles this morning your face would tell something. No, you go right along, Miss Mary Jane, and I’ll fix it with all of them. I’ll tell Miss Susan to give your love to your uncles and say you’ve went away for a few hours for to get a little rest and change, or to see a friend, and you’ll be back tonight or early in the morning.” “Gone to see a friend is all right, but I won’t have my love given to them.” “Well, then, it sha’n’t be.” It was well enough to tell HER so — no harm in it. It was only a little thing to do, and no trouble; and it’s the little things that smooths people’s roads the most, down here below; it would make Mary Jane comfortable, and it wouldn’t cost nothing. Then I says: “There’s one more thing — that bag of money.” “Well, they’ve got that; and it makes me feel pretty silly to think HOW they got it.” “No, you’re out, there. They hain’t got it.” “Why, who’s got it?” “I wish I knowed, but I don’t. I HAD it, because I stole it from them; and I stole it to give to you; and I know where I hid it, but I’m afraid it ain’t there no more. I’m awful sorry, Miss Mary Jane, I’m just as sorry as I can be; but I done the best I could; I did honest. I come nigh getting caught, and I had to shove it into the first place I come to, and run — and it warn’t a good place.” “Oh, stop blaming yourself — it’s too bad to do it, and I won’t allow it — you couldn’t help it; it wasn’t your fault. Where did you hide it?” I didn’t want to set her to thinking about her troubles again; and I couldn’t seem to get my mouth to tell her what would make her see that corpse laying in the coffin with that bag of money on his stomach. So for a minute I didn’t say nothing; then I says: “I’d ruther not TELL you where I put it, Miss Mary Jane, if you don’t mind letting me off; but I’ll write it for you on a piece of paper, and you can read it along the road to Mr. Lothrop’s, if you want to. Do you reckon that ’ll do?” “Oh, yes.” So I wrote: “I put it in the coffin. It was in there when you was crying there, away in the night. I was behind the door, and I was mighty sorry for you, Miss Mary Jane.” It made my eyes water a little to remember her crying there all by herself in the night, and them devils laying there right under her own roof, shaming her and robbing her; and when I folded it up and give it to her I see the water come into her eyes, too; and she shook me by the hand, hard, and says: “GOOD-bye. I’m going to do everything just as you’ve told me; and if I don’t ever see you again, I sha’n’t ever forget you and I’ll think of you a many and a many a time, and I’ll PRAY for you, too!”— and she was gone. Pray for me! I reckoned if she knowed me she’d take a job that was more nearer her size. But I bet she done it, just the same — she was just that kind. She had the grit to pray for Judus if she took the notion — there warn’t no back-down to her, I judge. You may say what you want to, but in my opinion she had more sand in her than any girl I ever see; in my opinion she was just full of sand. It sounds like flattery, but it ain’t no flattery. And when it comes to beauty — and goodness, too — she lays over them all. I hain’t ever seen her since that time that I see her go out of that door; no, I hain’t ever seen her since, but I reckon I’ve thought of her a many and a many a million times, and of her saying she would pray for me; and if ever I’d a thought it would do any good for me to pray for HER, blamed if I wouldn’t a done it or bust. Well, Mary Jane she lit out the back way, I reckon; because nobody see her go. When I struck Susan and the hare-lip, I says: “What’s the name of them people over on t’other side of the river that you all goes to see sometimes?” They says: “There’s several; but it’s the Proctors, mainly.” “That’s the name,” I says; “I most forgot it. Well, Miss Mary Jane she told me to tell you she’s gone over there in a dreadful hurry — one of them’s sick.” “Which one?”

“I don’t know; leastways, I kinder forget; but I thinks it’s —” “Sakes alive, I hope it ain’t HANNER?” “I’m sorry to say it,” I says, “but Hanner’s the very one.” “My goodness, and she so well only last week! Is she took bad?” “It ain’t no name for it. They set up with her all night, Miss Mary Jane said, and they don’t think she’ll last many hours.” “Only think of that, now! What’s the matter with her?” I couldn’t think of anything reasonable, right off that way, so I says: “Mumps.” “Mumps your granny! They don’t set up with people that’s got the mumps.” “They don’t, don’t they? You better bet they do with THESE mumps. These mumps is different. It’s a new kind, Miss Mary Jane said.” “How’s it a new kind?” “Because it’s mixed up with other things.” “What other things?” “Well, measles, and whooping-cough, and erysiplas, and consumption, and yaller janders, and brain-fever, and I don’t know what all.” “My land! And they call it the MUMPS?” “That’s what Miss Mary Jane said.” “Well, what in the nation do they call it the MUMPS for?” “Why, because it IS the mumps. That’s what it starts with.” “Well, ther’ ain’t no sense in it. A body might stump his toe, and take pison, and fall down the well, and break his neck, and bust his brains out, and somebody come along and ask what killed him, and some numskull up and say, ’Why, he stumped his TOE.’Would ther’ be any sense in that? NO. And ther’ ain’t no sense in THIS, nuther. Is it ketching?” “Is it KETCHING? Why, how you talk. Is a HARROW catching — in the dark? If you don’t hitch on to one tooth, you’re bound to on another, ain’t you? And you can’t get away with that tooth without fetching the whole harrow along, can you? Well, these kind of mumps is a kind of a harrow, as you may say — and it ain’t no slouch of a harrow, nuther, you come to get it hitched on good.” “Well, it’s awful, I think,” says the hare-lip. “I’ll go to Uncle Harvey and —” “Oh, yes,” I says, “I WOULD. Of COURSE I would. I wouldn’t lose no time.” “Well, why wouldn’t you?” “Just look at it a minute, and maybe you can see. Hain’t your uncles obleegd to get along home to England as fast as they can? And do you reckon they’d be mean enough to go off and leave you to go all that journey by yourselves? YOU know they’ll wait for you. So fur, so good. Your uncle Harvey’s a preacher, ain’t he? Very well, then; is a PREACHER going to deceive a steamboat clerk? is he going to deceive a SHIP CLERK? — so as to get them to let Miss Mary Jane go aboard? Now YOU know he ain’t. What WILL he do, then? Why, he’ll say, ’It’s a great pity, but my church matters has got to get along the best way they can; for my niece has been exposed to the dreadful pluribus-unum mumps, and so it’s my bounden duty to set down here and wait the three months it takes to show on her if she’s got it.’ But never mind, if you think it’s best to tell your uncle Harvey —” “Shucks, and stay fooling around here when we could all be having good times in England whilst we was waiting to find out whether Mary Jane’s got it or not? Why, you talk like a muggins.” “Well, anyway, maybe you’d better tell some of the neighbors.” “Listen at that, now. You do beat all for natural stupidness. Can’t you SEE that THEY’D go and tell? Ther’ ain’t no way but just to not tell anybody at ALL.” “Well, maybe you’re right — yes, I judge you ARE right.” “But I reckon we ought to tell Uncle Harvey she’s gone out a while, anyway, so he won’t be uneasy about her?” “Yes, Miss Mary Jane she wanted you to do that. She says, ’Tell them to give Uncle Harvey and William my love and a kiss, and say I’ve run over the river to see Mr.’— Mr. — what IS the name of that rich family your uncle Peter used to think so much of? — I mean the one that —” “Why, you must mean the Apthorps, ain’t it?” “Of course; bother them kind of names, a body can’t ever seem to remember them, half the time, somehow.

To Be Continued Next Issue


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 17


Page 18 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Tax Returns from $66. Our fee from your refund (conditions apply)

Our Best Refund So Far Tax $48K

GST $120K,

until you beat it!

Tax paid by one single entity $3mil.

Accounting and tax for Multi structures, Pty Ltd companies, Trusts, Partnerships, SM Super funds and audits, negative gearings, Small and Medium business. GPs, Specialists, Trades,em. IT, wholesalers/retailers, ELS lodgement.

Call Jai Hari Iyer M.Com. M.Ed. PGDip. Pr Mgt, CPA Phone: 8692 0057, 0478 392 541 www.hariiyer.com.au hhiyer@hotmail.com


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 19


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Page 20 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

What’s New


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 21

includes Stitch Regulator, worth $795

$4499

Price $999

Save $500

Save $100

$499

Many More Brands and Models to Choose From


Page 22 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 23

Spring Homemaker

Phone: 1300 TREEFX (873339)


Page 24 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 25

Places To Go


Page 26 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Places To Go

A distinctly European adventure... Grand Canal, Venice, Italy

...just bring us your ideas, your dates and your budget!

Kilkenny Castle, Kilkenny, Ireland

1300 783 188 askus@activetravel.com.au www.activetravel.com.au


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 27

Places To Go


Page 28 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

1800 231 311

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer

DIRECTORY

In print and online at MelbourneObserver.com.au

From just $5 per week

PROMOTE your business to local people in the Melbourne Observer newspaper. Your ad will appear in the weekly print issue. Your ad will also be seen - at no extra charge - in our online edition at www.MelbourneObserver.com.au This can improve your Google ranking at no extra charge.

Trades & Services

COMPARE OUR ECONOMICAL PRICES (includes GST): $12.50 per insertion for casual clients (4-issue minimum). SAVE! $10 per insertion for 13-issues. ($130 package) SAVE! $7.50 per insertion for 26-issues. ($195 package). SAVE! $5 per insertion for 44-issues. ($220 package). ● All Observer advertising packages are pre-paid. We accept payment by Visa, Mastercard and American Express, with no surcharge. Or Direct Debit 033091 260131.

● All Trades & Services Directory ads are in full-colour, at no extra charge. ● No cancellations or refunds are available for discounted pre-paid advertising packages. ● No proofs or previews on discounted package ads. ● Free copy changes are welcome at any time during the run of your ad, at no extra charge. Phone 1800 231 311 before 5pm Fridays.

AUTO SERVICES

CREDIT MANAGEMENT

PLUMBING

DELTA DRIVING L SCHOOL P

Specialised Credit Collection for Tradies

R & R CENTRAL PLUMBING Small Jobs Specialist

Patient & Experienced Driving Instructor Auto & Manual

0458 711 700

BUILDERS, BUILDING SERVICES

Classic • Decks Carports Pergolas •• Pergolas • Verandahs Plans and Permits Specialising in Timber and Colorbond® Free Quote call Eddie:

0413 128 242

BUILDING & RENOVATION GENERAL

Our goal is to recover YOUR money, owed to you as fast as possible; cost-effective for your business without damaging your relationship with the clients

Fast Action Debt Recovery P/L Speak with Michael Conway OAM, Director. Phone: 0402 142 866 www.fastaction.net.au

• • • •

REMOVALS

Taps • Hot Water Changeovers Toilets • Burst/Leaking Pipes Blocked Drains/Sewers Carbon Monoxide Safety Checks No call out fees

Rod 0409 171 286

Lic 44353

Visa & Mastercard accepted

RENDERING

REBLOCKING/UNDERPINNING

HANDYMAN

DANIEL’S

HANDYMAN SERVICE

• General Painting - Int/Ext • Home Maintenance • Gutters Cleaned • Windows Cleaned • Free Quotes • Quality Assured

0425 745 459 HEATING AND AIR CONDITIONING

FIVE STAR REBLOCKING & UNDERPINNING

Antonio’s Rendering

Contact Simon: 9309 0700 • 0411 174 000

0425 795 762

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

✔ Solid Render ✔ Texture ✔ Polystyrene ANY JOB - Big or Small 35 years experience Free Quotes - Call

Full Insurance All work Council approved 15 years guarantee All Council permits supplied 100% computer levelling Concrete pump used 15 years experience For a free quote and advice

RENDERING RENDERING PLASTERING & PAINTING

REBLOCKING/UNDERPINNING

JOSWIL BUILDERS ✔ Extensions/Renovations ✔ Expert in Upper Storeys ✔ Design and Construct ★ Free Quotes ★

• Foam Insulation • Plasterboard • Blue Board Free Quotes. Friendly Service.

☛ 25 YEARS EXPERIENCE ☛ REGD MASTER BUILDER

Paul 9759 7585 0411 189 594

CARPENTRY WRIGHT CHOICE CARPENTRY Dylan Wright Mobile: 0426 501 445 E: dyl.wright@live.com.au @wrightchoicecarpentry Decks, Pergolas, Carports, Gates, Extensions, Renovations, Building Maintenance, Any Carpentry Needs Call now for a quote

CLEANING SERVICES

0439 046 716 HEATING AND FIREPLACES LIC. 51016

All Makes & Models Your Local Expert Pensioners Discounts • No Hidden Costs! ■ Ducted Heating ■ Split Systems ■ Wall Furnace/Space Heater ■ Carbon Mononxide Testing Keeping Your Family Safe Installtion, Ser vice & Repairs Licensed Plumber & Gas Fitter

✆ 0431 577 063 PLASTERERS

Michael Dempsey Heritage Conservations Pty Ltd

• Genuine Equipment • Genuine Quality Duct Cleaning & Repairs • Genuine 19 years’ experience

w w w.kmark. c om.au .kmark.c 0411 602 106

CONCRETING

ALL RENDERING AND PLASTERING • Internal and External • Traditional and Modern Mike 0412 353 007 PLUMBING

CRAIG’S GAS & PLUMBING Specialist in Gas Appliance Service & Installation

COMMERCIAL INDUSTRIAL & RESIDENTIAL CONCRETING CONTACT US FOR A FREE QUOTE

0499 773 569

COMCONCRETE@OUTLOOK.COM

• Service to Ducted Heaters, Wall Furnaces, Space Heaters, Stoves & Ovens • Supply & Installation of Gas Appliances • Carbon Monoxide testing on Heaters • Replacement hot water units • Pensioner discounts

Phone: 9379 1733 www.craigsgas.com.au LIC 33201

Promote your business Melbournewide If you are serious about winning customers across Melbourne, place a listing in the Melbourne Observer Trades and Services Directory. From as little as $5-a-week for a colour business-card-size ad, your listing will be seen across the metropolitan area in print and online. And if you specialise in just a certain section of Melbourne (north, south, east or west), say so in your ad, then you can attract customers in your local area. To arrange for your business to be listed, call one of our friendly ad-visors at the Melbourne Observer Advertising Department .

Melbourne

Observer

Phone 1800 231 311


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 29

Observer Crossword Solution No 37 I N N E A V A Z N A I V R I M A D E A B A S E T S C A B E T R A N C T O F R I Y A M A S I A T L T I D I E I G U L F H T R T H A I U T M E L T L E O P O O R U Y P E D L M Y O M A N Y N E S M O E B M O A N R B R O G U Y O O V E R S O S O T M R E S P A A R S H A I R

R I P E R E B B T I D E O

N

E

T

A

E K E E N E S T O I N K S

M O G O L T E I S S E D Y E X D O D E W N A T I F G S R A N C D M A O T E H E R S C M A A R N E Y E D U T S K I Y U R R E I P A T Y

S T W I O S H I D T S I B A N C K A S E S O E R T I E N P G H E M B E R A L L A B R M A D R O R L S E T Y S D D O W E N H P Y D L E

R H A F O F V I E A R D E O D G G Y Y M O N U T H H E G D O A L M E A T B I A N E X E P I R A T E E E L U S P E E D B B S L A E N D E A L

E T I N A M G M C I A N C E T I N S I T D R C E A S E C O D E A N R O S E S S A O T A N R A T E E O D O M G N W A M E N O L A S T S T W P R E F O R E R T N W P I N A A D A M L R N E S T D I A P Y R T I A O N E R H B L O S E E L L A M S A R U M P S I A I R M A N S E G F T I N G E E N N O L T A L E N T A S T R E P A R L L E T U A U P S S P U N S S P E C I B E L H A S I A I F F E R D T M I E N S E S

MELBOURNE OBSERVER MEGA 037 - (X grid) MEGA.eps. © Lovatts Crosswords 11/1/07 - Artist - JT

A L I C O Y T N I U X A K E L E S S T M E T T E L L G E N T R E E T E R A W T R E E R E R O N R E T E E R G O A E A N N O T L O N I F I N O O N T O B H B A I L L S E N T A S L L R E B L E I A N G L E O L S L E Y I S T A G E B E A L I S R E M C A A G U D G E E S I

L U C I L L E

I E M K E R A Y Y E T R E S S

A R S C O N T I N E N Y T O U A D R S T R O O L L P R A U C L H A A S E N C A C P I E D A S L I T N G H

S A L O O N

M E S T H A M A E S R I N T I N P E S E U N D O T N Y M I N N C E I N M S R E A N O P L E C C P P E H E A R S E E D

R U I N O K N A S P A C R A Y E O N X Y N G E O N A S T P E O K E V S M E G N E N E D A E R M N E U S N S D O L M I E N I R U R B S

E C A O D G M E A R A B T H E O N S

R E A E S L E A L N R R E O A A D M I L L Y O G I I C E L L E L S A G O M P B P E A H R S E N S S A S U D D O O R R U S U R R A N L E A A S S S A S R B C M A H O O T O P I L E E N A G R G S A L V M E A N P E G L U K E L E

A T E E A M S P A S P P K L I D A N N C E D O A N G I N W A E N M E B L A E N Y O D R E A M U P O M B E D D I G E N E C T E O N E C H T O

E D E E E D R I L C A W E Y E I R S H S K S I N G E L L D N S E D S T R E W R S A C H Y A B E R O O N C K O E S Y S T A P N S

Church

Looking for a Professional to run the show? ★ Compere/Host ★ Auctioneer ★ Promotions ★ A-Grade Journalist ★ Voice-Over Commercials ★ Race Caller All Sports, Race Nights ★ TV, Radio, Press ★ Respected Member of the Media

Ted Ryan Phone 9876 1652 Mobile: 0412 682 927 E-Mail: tedryan@australiaonline.net.au ted.ryan@optusnet.com.au


Page 30 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Observer Victorian Sport Melbourne

Winners at Yarra Valley This Week

■ Wednesday - Echuca, Thursday Geelong, Friday - Melton, Saturday - Bendigo, Sunday - Swan Hill, Monday - Kilmore, Tuesday - Ararat.

Horses To Follow

■ Laredo Torpedo, Dynamite Dingo, Offthetopofmyhead, Elteearr, Macray Muchacho, Illawong Mary, Aussie Beach Blond, Dependlebury, Kyvalley Blur, Courtney John.

Select team

■ Terang's Xavier O/Connor is doing a great job with his small but select team and improving 6Y0 Always A Virgin-Jilliby Ebony mare Too Swift was victorious in the DNR Logistics Pace for C0 class over 2150 metres at Bendigo on Thursday. Driven by Xavier, Too Swift was able to retain the front running from the pole and after being rated to perfection, defied all challengers to score by 3.2 metres from Its Powder Blue along the sprint lane from three back the markers in a rate of 1-58.4. Shancurragh was third 4.7 metres back after a one/one trip.

Favourite third ■ Two features were held at Tabcorp Park Melton on Friday - The Tab.com,au Gammalite for M2 to M4 class over 2240 metres and the (Group 3) Aldebaran Park Maori's Idol Trotters Free For All over 1720 metres, both to the value of $20,000. Kerryn Manning's former Kiwi Mr Mojito was an all of the way victor of The Gammalite in a slick rate of 1-54.8. A 5Y0 gelded don of Real Desire and Wanaka Bay, Mr Mojito coasted to the wire 2.2 metres clear on Mister Onetwo which trailed and the hot favourite My Kiwi Mate who was 5.9 metres away in third place. It was a similar scenario in the Maori's Idol, with evergreen 8Y0 Pegasus SpurSundonna mare Maori Time trained by Brent Lilley and driven by Gavin Lang leading throughout from outside the front line to score by 3.7 metres from Kyvalley Spur in 1-57.3 giving Lilley the quinella. C;over Mac was a game third a neck away after racing in the open.

Crowd funding ■ Australia’s peak body for the Arts and Disability Sector, Arts Access Australia is aiming to raise $20,000 to help get eight exceptionally talented Australian artists with disability to Berlin for the Australia-Berlin Arts Exchange Project. The Australia-Berlin Exchange is an international Arts and Disability festival that will showcase some of the best artists with disabilities from around the world from 9-20 October. The crowdfunding campaign has been launched on Pozible and is already attracting pledges from across Australia. The $20,000 will be used to fund muchneeded access and support for artists not currently covered by Australian Government funding, including airfares and accommodation for three access assistants/ supporters, and access costs to support participation such as AUSLAN and language interpreters, Braille interpretation and ramps for wheelchair users.

■ Popular Melton trainer/driver Ken Tippet was in the winners stall at Yarra Valley on Monday September 4, when 4Y0 Rocknroll HanoverInto The Fire gelding Prosthesis greeted the judge in the Yarra Glen Quality Meats Trotters Mobile for TR0 & TR1 class over 2150 metres. Bred and raced by NSW based Brooklyn Lodge Aberdeen Pty Ltd, Prosthesis led virtually throughout from gate three as the warm poleline favourite Breezin Around galloped shortly after the start. Given an easy time, Prosthesis won as he pleased by 15.3 metres in advance of Redason which raced exposed, with Illawong Bliss 2.9 metres away in third place after trailing the winner. The mile rate 2-05.5.

Harness Racing

Melbourne

Observer

Upset victory

■ Little known Riddell trainer John Heffer scored an upset victory at Yarra Valley, taking the Coldstream Timber Trotters Handicap for T0 or better class over 2150 metres with 10Y0 Wind Cries Maori-Diamond Copy gelding I Am I Cried which paid Supertab odds of $24.80. Driven by Josh Duggan, I Am I Cried having his second outing since January last year, was first out from a solo front line draw, before surrendering the lead to Ghent hitting the back straight on the first occasion. Looking to be under pressure approaching the final bend as the leader kicked clear, I Am I Cried rallied along the sprint lane in the straight to prevail by a nose in a tricky finish from Ghent in a 2-06.4 mile rate. Omy Son (one/one last lap - three wide home turn) was third a neck away. It was I Am I Cried's 3rd victory in 31 outings.

Most honest

■ Caroline Springs part-owner/trainer/driver Julian Attard's very honest 5Y0 Jeremes JetLavish Franco gelding Franco returned to his best form when successful in the 1650 metre C2 class De Bortoli Pace at Yarra Valley . Beginning swiftly from gate four, Franco assumed control running into the first turn and was never headed, just lasting by a head from Most Happy Cullen which raced outside him in a rate of 1-57.5. Blue Chipped was 3.1 metres back in third place after following the winner.

Win at Mindura

■ At Mildura on Wednesday. former NSW resident Brett Cox who grew up through the pony trots, scored a huge victory with 5Y0 Rocknroll Heaven-Lifeinthecountry mare Lifeinheaven in the C1 class DNR Logistics Pace over 2190 metres. Fast away from the pole to retain the lead, Lifeinheaven driven by Brett, ran her rivals ragged, scoring by 7.1 metres from Shark Alert which trailed in a slick rate of 2-04.2. Charlie Knew was third 7.4 metres away after racing wide. Brett is based at Red Cliffs and is building up a handy team.

Ahead by a neck

■ Local trainer Terry Gange has registered many wins on the Mildura circuit and 4Y0 Grinfromeartoear-Covet Me gelding Happyaslarry was a tough victor of the Mildura Holden Pace for C0 class over 1790 metres in a mile rate of 2-04.1. Driven by Ballarat based Nathan Weightman a regular at Mildura meetings, Happyaslarry commenced a forward move three wide racing for the bell and sustained a long run to gain the day by a neck over the South Australian Elizamarie which led, withAlpha Jet 1.3 metres back in third place after trailing the runner up and having little room in the straight.

157th appearance

■ It's very rare these days for South Australians not to win a race at Mildura and David Smith kept the home flag flying by taking out the Finn Tack Pace for C2 class over 1790 metres with Whata Escape, a 9Y0 Ponder-My Opal Dream gelding who was making his 157th

len-baker@ bigpond.com

with Len Baker race appearance. Leading from the pole, Whata Escape was never headed, reaching the wire 1.4 metres in advance of Banks which trailed in a rate of 1-58.1. Ultimate Dawn was 2.8 metres away in third place after racing wide in the last lap. It was the 14th occasion that Whata Escape has greeted the judge, the previous occasion being in October last year.

Ran home best ■ Talented local concessional reinsman Ryan Duffy chalked up his 6th winner after only gaining his licence a few of months back, when successful aboard father Steven's 7Y0 Life SignArrive Safely gelding Long Ago in the DPR Insurance Pace for C0 to C4 class over 2190 metres at Shepparton on Wednesday. Enjoying a cosy trip from the pole trailing the leader Sammysluck (gate three) after leading out, Long Ago eased off the back of the pacemaker on turning and ran home best to score by 5.1 metres from Hezthebigbopper from near last at the bell, with Sammysluck weakening to finish third 6.9 metres back. The mile rate 1-59.2. It was a real family affair as Long Ago is raced by Ryan's mother Julie.

Surged past leader ■ Avenel duo David and Josh Aiken combined to land the Elite Horse Transport Pace for C2 to C4 class over 2190 metres at Shepparton with He Can Fly, a much travelled Kiwi bred 5Y0 Bettors Delight-Falcons Flybye gelding who was having his 6th start for the stable. Beginning brilliantly from outside the front line, He Can Fly was unable to head off the well supported pole marker Sixty, resulting in him having to race exposed for the entire journey. Surging past the leader prior to the home turn, He Can Fly was untroubled to run out an easy 12.8 metre victor in advance of Midnitedelite from well back in the field, with The High Roller a half neck away in third place after trailing the leader. The mile rate 1-58.6.

Son in the sulky ■ Marg Lee's Terang stable continue to churn out the winners and promising Elsu-Indie L|Jazz gelding Mended chalked up his second success in three outings by taking the $10,000 Vicbred Platinum Home Grown Classic for 3Y0 Colts & Geldings over 1650 metres at Bendigo. With son Jason in the sulky, Mended led from the pole before surrendering to the pressure of Amendment Thirteen with a circuit to travel. Briefly held up approaching the final bend, Mended when extricated into the clear on turning, ran home strongly to defeat Comprehend (one/one at bell) by a metre, with You Ninety Two a game third a head away after racing exposed. The mile rate 1-56.1. Mended was to survive a protest from the runner up alleging interference on straightening. - Len Baker

Travel and Wine Amen Break

■ Brothers Steve and Matt Harrop drew on fruit from 30-year old vines grown on the site of an old bluestone quarry in the cool Victorian Highlands, to create a most-moreish 2015 Chardonnay under their unusually named Amen Break label. Amen Break is said to be the most sampled drum beat in musical history, and the Harrop brothers say that just as that drum beat is perfect in its simplicity, so too is their philosophy to replicate a winemaking “perfect simplicity.” “Our vines produce a small crop of concentrated, outstanding quality fruit that is harvested by hand, and to which we apply minimal intervention to achieve exceptional quality,” they say. “The Quarry Ridge Vineyard is 550m above sea level near Kilmore, a high, cold place where crops are low and farming must be exact – we hand-pick when acidity, sugar and flavour are all in balance, and our winemaking is simple but precise.” The brothers’ 2015 Amen Break Chardonnay is high altitude Chardonnay at its best, with a beautiful palate of fig and pear flavours, mealy phenolic at the finish, and bright acidity. At $25 enjoy on its own, or with grilled veal chops and creamy-sauced mushrooms. ONE TO NOTE: Not only is D’Arenberg’s 2015 The Footbolt Shiraz quintessential McLaren Vale Shiraz, it takes us back 103 years to when founder Joseph Osborn made the gut-wrenching decision to sell his stable of highly successful race horses, to buy a vineyard. A teetotaller, Joseph Osborn grew and sold wine grapes for nine years before his death in 1921, when son Frank took over their vineyards, and added a winery in 1927. Frank and his wife Helen D’Arenberg had a son Francis, who was more generally known as d’Arry, and who in 1943 at just 16 joined his father running the vineyards and winery. On Frank’s death in 1957, d’Arry took control and launched his own d’Arenberg label named in honour of his mother. And in 1996 his d’Arenberg Old Vine Shiraz was renamed d’Arenberg The Footbolt Shiraz – Footbolt being Joseph Osborn’s favourite horse that he had sold back in 1912 to buy his first vineyard. A current 2015 Footbolt Shiraz is proof why Shiraz is king of McLaren Vale wines – rich and full-bodied with ripe blackberry and spice aromas, it’s all about dark cherries, plums, rhubarb and aniseed, and varietal pepper and spice in the mouth. Pay $18 to enjoy with roast duck breast and a raspberry sauce.

Struth

■ Thailand’s Maeklong Railway Market must surely be one of the world’s most-aptly named market places. Because half a dozen times a day, visitors who aren’t in the know get the surprise of their lives to find themselves suddenly faceto-fender on the narrow, crowded, open-air alleyway in which they are shopping, staring into the front of a pulsing diesel-hauled passenger train. And that’s the result of a railway line that’s run some 70km from Bangkok since 1904, slicing right through the Maeklong market and its hundreds upon hundreds of stall-holders, who sell everything from meats and seafoods, groceries and fruits and vegetables, herbs and spices, clothing and flowers, to freshlycooked Thai foodstuffs at dozens of little snack bars and cafés. So busy is it, in fact, that vendors pile their wares right up to, and in some cases, even into the very rail track on their narrow footways. And then on those half dozen times a day when a little warning bell tinkles over the loudspeaker system, and a few minutes later there’s the blasting of a diesel locomotive’s horn, they quickly, yet calmly, move their goods back from between the rail lines, and drag back their overhanging shade awnings, to clear a path for the approaching train. - David Ellis


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 31 e urn lbo Me

Every Week in the Melbourne Observer

ver N ser O Ob TI C SE 3

Observer Showbiz

On This Day: By Greg Newman ............................. Page 32 Theatre: Anarcist Feminist .............................................. Page 33 Country Music: Back at the Caravan Club .................... Page 32 Jim and Aaron: What’s Hot and What’s Not ..................... Page 34 Cheryl Threadgold: Local theatre shows ...................... Inside Pages OVATT”S MEGA CRO PL US THE LLO PLUS CROSSSWORD

ZOMBIES HIT MELBOURNE Creatures of the Night

Quarter Life Crisis

● Director Sarah Wall. ■ After sold out shows in November 2016 and March 2017, the Creatures of the Night Cabaret is back. Creatures of the Night is a horror-themed comedy cabaret not for the faint of heart and is full of original songs from September 19 - 23 at the Lithuanian Club this Melbourne Fringe Festival. Tran Zan, an intergalactic alien, opens their home to the creepiest of creatures from the darkest of places for a night full of fun, fear and frivolity. A cast of 11 creatures will sing their cold hearts out to prove they are more than they seem on the surface. There is also a mystery to solve – who is the mysterious VH? What do they want? Are you game to find out? Most of the cast met during their time with Student Theatre at La Trobe University. Not wanting to say goodbye after they graduated, director Sarah Wall decided to bring everyone together once more to create Creatures of the Night. With endless collective musical and performing experience amongst the cast, you will be swept away with the dark delights of this cabaret. This production opens on September 19 and runs for five nights. Bookings are highly recommended. Performance season: September 19 – 23 at 9.30pm Cost: $20-25 Venue: Lithuanian Club Main Theatre, 44 Errol St, North Melbourne Tickets: https://www.melbournefringe.com.au/event/ creatures-of-the-night-cabaret/ - Cheryl Threadgold

Laramie Project ■ The Hartwell Players present The Laramie Project from September 28 – October 1 at the Ashwood High School Performing Arts Centre, directed by Kellie Tweeddale. Written by Moises Kaufman and members of the Tectonic Theatre Project, The Laramie Project comprises monologues and dialogue based on hundreds of interviews, news reports and court transcripts taken from the people of Laramie after the brutal death of Matthew Shepard. Matthew was a 21-year-old University of Wyoming student who was kidnapped in 1998, severely beaten, tortured and tied to a fence to die, because he was gay. His battered body was found the next day and he died in hospital shortly afterwards. Performance details: September 28, 29, 30 at 8pm, September 30 at 2pm, October 1 at 5pm Venue: Ashwood High School Performing Arts Centre, Vannam Drive, Ashwood. Bookings: www.trybooking.com/ONJF - Cheryl Threadgold

● Lauren Bailey in Anno Zombie. Photo: Michael Foxington ■ Calling all fans of zombies and Melbourne to the Loft at Chapel off Chapel. There is something in Anno Zombie to appeal to all, even those people such as myself not accustomed to the zombie genre. Anno Zombie produced by Baggage Productions and written by the talented Bridgette Burton displays humour, ‘taste’ and dead people. This is a unique piece of theatre that surprisingly left me pondering a number of things. The virtue of science and when too much is too much. Whether dead people really could exist working in the same job day after day, could their fate be reversed, and when will this show be turned into a toe tapping musical ( great singing by the way). Natasha Broadstock has assembled a talented energetic cast who under her direction deliver a polished, funny, creative show. Kudos to all the cast, with Kelly Nash a standout playing various characters all different and captivating. Whilst the zombie theme does not inspire me, the characters in this show are mostly human with a commentary on modern day Melbourne. It is easy to be drawn into the various beliefs and care for the predicament each character is in. There is a lot to offer and whilst the set is a tad too white, the pieces are all there for a great night at the theatre, just don’t get bitten. Performance Season: Until September 16 Venue: Chapel off Chapel, 12 Little Chapel Street, Prahran Bookings: www.baggageproductions.com - Review by Elizabeth Semmel

● Courtney Ammenhauser in Quarter Life Crisis. ■ The General Public Theatre Company is presenting Quarter Life Crisis at The Cavern in the Metropolitan Hotel in North Melbourne from September 25 – 30. Directed by Lakia Pattinson and written and performed by Courtney Ammenhauser, this one-woman show about love, life and peanut butter is playing as part of the Melbourne Fringe Festival. Steph is on the eve of her 25th birthday. She is a millennial office worker who went to uni, got a job, fell in and out of love and now … what? She is starting to question a few things such as is this life? Is this adulthood? Is this it? Season dates: September 25 – 30 Time: 9.45pm start, 50 minutes duration Venue: The Cavern, Metropolitan Hotel, North Melbourne Tickets: $25 full price, $20 concession Bookings: www.melbournefringe.com.au - Cheryl Threadgold

Rock of Ages ■ The Phoenix Theatre Company presents Rock of Ages until September 16 at the Doncaster Playhouse. Directed and choreographed by Renee Maloney and musically directed by John Clancy, the show is set at the end of the 1980s in Hollywood where a party has been raging hard. Aqua Net, Lycra, lace and liquor flow freely at one of the Sunset Strip’s last legendary venues, a place where sex machine Stacee Jaxx takes the stage and scantily clad groupies line up to turn their fantasies into reality. Amidst the madness, aspiring rock star (and resident toilet cleaner) Drew longs to take the stage as the next big thing (and longs for small-town girl Sherri, fresh off the bus from Kansas with stars in her eyes). But the rock and roll fairy-tale is about to end when German developers sweep into town with plans to turn the fabled Strip into just another capitalist strip mall. Can Drew, Sherri and the gang save the strip–and themselves–before it's too late? Turn To Page 33


Page 32 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Observer Showbiz

Country Music, Radio, Theatre, Almanac Country Crossroads

By Rob Foenander info@countrycrossroads.com.au

Brian at the Van ■ The Stories and Songs Record Club is back at the Caravan Club, Oakleigh, on Wednesday, September 20. The effervescent Brian Nankervis is host. The public isinvited to bring along their favourite vinyl records and explain their connection to the album. Special guests Charles Jenkins and Lisa Miller share their personal stories and songs and also play live. There will be laughter, tears, sharpie dancing and a shared joyous appreciation of why music matters, says the promotion team.oeal.

No Limit appears ■ Melbourne band No Limit will rock the Sandown Regency on Saturday (Sept. 16) A night of Country and Rock n Roll is on offer with special guest singers Sandra and Esric Jackson also joining in the event.

Keith in Melb. ■ Seekers founding member Keith Potger will perform his very successful solo show on Sunday, September 24. Melbourne's Sri Lankan Burgher Association will host the Musical Soiree at their community hall in Clayton. More info and tickets: 8790 1610 or 0418 304 625. - Rob Foenander ■ More than 400 people attended last Thursday’s service for Don Kinsey at Eltham Community Centre.

Heide Museum of Modern Art Screen Printing: Learn the art of screen printing with Spacecraft Studio. To celebrate the exhibition Call of the AvantGarde: Constructivism and Australian Art, Heide has collaborated with Spacecraft Studios and artists Rose Nolan and Melinda Harper to produce a ranger of exclusive products. Join the award-winning Spacecraft team ad artist Melinda Harper in Collingwood for a boutique Sunday afternoon workshop. Learn the art of screen printing within a studio environment and create your own print to take home. Cost: Adult $145 / Member $140 inclusive of all materials. Complimentary Prosecco and cheese. Sunday. September 14.: 2pm - 5pm. Art talk: Justin Andrews and Emily Floyd Artists Justin Andrews and Emily Floyd join curator Lesley Harding for a discussion of their work. Saturday September 30 at 2pm. - Peter Kemp

National Gallery Contemporary Video Installations The National Gallery of Australia has launched a collection of five major works by Angela Mesiti, including the recent acquisition of Mesiti's video installation, The Calling (201314). One of Australia's most significant moving picture practitioners, Mesiti has exhibited widely throughout Australia, North America and Europe. This is the first gallery exhibition of Mesiti's work. The pieces capture Mesiti's exploration of non-verbal communication, especially sound and gesture. The Calling explores the use of whistled languages in communities in Turkey, Greece and the Canary Islands. Through cinematic tableaux that emphasises each sideways glance and minute gesture, Mesiti presents a moving picture of an ancient means of communication threatened by modern technologies. The NGA is presenting The Calling alongside the award- winning Rapture, citizens band, Nakh removed and The colour of saying in its Contemporary Gardens until March. The installations are part of an ongoing seroes at the NGA focused on leading contemporary artists and highlights the Gallery's renewed emphasis on the moving Image. Angelica Mesiti runs until March 2018. - Peter Kemp

Glen Eira Arts Annemarie Szeleczky - Toxic Beauty: Selected paintings, collages, assemblages, drawings, printmaking and animate4 films by

r Obser vbeiz On This Day Show

Wednesday Thursday Sept. 14 Sept. 13

■ US jazz singer Mel Torme was born in Illinois in 1925. He died aged 73 in 1999. English-born USresident-actress Jacqueline Bisset was born in 1944 (73). TV newsreader Marie-Louise Thiele was born in 1965 US sprinter Michael Johnson is 50 (1967).

■ New Zealand actor Sam Neill was born in Northern Ireland in 1947 (70). US actress Mary Crosby, daughter of Bing, was born in 1959 (58). Australian singer Wes Carr is 35 (1982) The late Amy Winehouse was born in 1983. She died in 2011

Ophelia Sal

Melbourne Arts artist Annemarie Szeleczky are included in this exhibition, which focuses on themes relating to environmental degradation. The artist employs discarded and found materials in order to address her great concern for the environment, climate change and the deadly pollution present on land and sea. Exhibition runs from September 14 - October 1. 2017 Youth Art Exhibition: The 2017 Youth Art Exhibition is your chance to see the amazing talents of young artists in the City of Glen Eira. This annual event, hosted by Glen Eira Youth Services, brings together all mediums of art into an exciting display open to family, friends and the wider community, The Exhibition highlights and celebrates young peoplke fopr their unique talents and their ability to interpret life through art. Exhibition rums from September 14 - October 1. - Peter Kemp

Laurent Gallery Black Is Artist Statement: As white light can be divided into a myriad of colours, Black is the absence of colour. Ironically white paint is the complete absence of colour and black the combination of every colour. Laurent expresses in her latest exhibition Black Isa new artistic and personal beginning, After 23 years as a professional artist, Laurent's exhibition coincides with her 50th birthday and marks the turning point, once and for all, away from her figurative expressionist style, her colours and her pictorial poetic talk to a new calligraphic abstract body of work. This bold exhibition becomes her declaration, to turn away from worldly details, colours, superficial information, intellectualised composition and pictorial explanations. French painter Pierre August Renoir declared: “I've been 20 years discovering that the queen of all colours was black, we heard Lauren whisper precisely.” Season runs to October 10. Laurent Gallery, 115 Thistlethwaite St, South Melbourne.

● Ophelia Sal in The Birth of the Unicorn Mermaid. The Birth of the Unicorn Mermaid is being presented from September 25 to October 1 at The Butterfly Club. ■ Ophelia Sal is returning to prove the haters wrong at the baby shower of the year and introduce the Unicorn Mermaid, the mythical creature we apparently know so much about, yet have never laid eyes on because it doesn’t exist. Investigating the moral injustices surrounding ‘designer babies’ in a world that competes for perfection, Ophelia will create a supernatural being that is more fantastic and talented than everyone else’s child. Filled with glitter and yummy mummies, dance numbers and hairy monsters, Ophelia will take you on an immersive journey exploring her fears surrounding motherhood and the future of the human race. She will also pull apart why women are judged for conforming or not conforming to this gender role of being caring mothers. Green Room nominee for Best Performer Ruby Hughes presents her third solo show as Ophelia Sol. Ruby has been performing as her alter ego since 2014, creating work that challenges form, social binaries and stigmas. The Birth of the Unicorn Mermaid aims to dissect what it means to be a good mother, a bad mother, and everything in between. Performance dates: September 25 – October 3 at 8.30pm Tickets: $32-$25 Venue: The Butterfly Club, 5 Carson Place, Melbourne Tickets: www.thebutterflyclub.com - Cheryl Threadgold Melbourne

Observer

Friday Sept. 15

Saturday Sept. 16

■ Dame Agatha Christie, author, was born in Torquay, England, in 1890. She died aged 85 in 1976. US actor Jackie Cooper was born in Los Angeles in 1922. He died aged 88 in 2011. Rev. Fred Nile is 83. Prince Harry (Henry Charles Albert David Windsor) is 33.

■ US actress Lauren Bacall was born on this day. US blues guitarist B.B. King born in 1925. Columbo star Peter Falk was born in New York in 1927. US magician David Copperfield is 61. American singer Richard Marx was born in Chicago in 1963 (54).

Sunday Sept. 17

■ US country and western singer Hank Williams was born in 1923. He died aged 29 in 1953. English actor Roddy McDowall was born in 1928. He died aged 70 in 1998. Actress Anne Bancroft (Anna-Maria Italiano) was born in New York. She died aged 73.

Monday Sept. 18

■ Actress Greta Garbo was born in Stockholm in 1905. She died aged 84 in 1990. Australian comedian Slim de Grey was born in England in 1918. He died aged 88 in 2007. American singer Jimmie Rodgers was born in Washington in 1933 (84).

Tuesday Sept. 19 ■ British comic actor Derek Nimmo wasw born in 1931. He died aged 67 in 1999. Brian Epstein, former manager of The Beatles, was born in 1934. He died aged 33 in 1967. British actor Jeremy Irons was born on the Isle of Wight in 1948

Thanks to GREG NEWMAN of Jocks Journal for assistance with birthday and anniversary dates. Jocks Journal is Australia’s longest running radio industry publication. ■ Melbourne Find out more at www.jocksjournal.com


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Obser ver - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 33

Observer Showbiz

TV, Radio, Theatre

Mother ■ Director and writer Darren Aronofsky is no factotum — he excels in the dark wizardry of cinematic arts. Black Swan and Requiem for a Dream are testament to his capacity for paranoid horror films that are as disquieting as they are showy. Mother is no exception, an elaborate nightmare that takes you on a roller-coaster of WTF disbelief. In two distinct halves of Mother we experience where a couple’s very existence and relationship is sorely tested when uninvited guests arrive, two groups accepting (more like forcing) hospitality that leads to alarming events. Jennifer Lawrence is a young second wife of middle aged celebrity poet played by Javier Bardem – the characters are only known as “mother” and “him”. In a house in the middle of nowhere, Lawrence is renovating the spacious pastoral Victorian mansion. But it is no ordinary mansion as it holds deep and frightening memories of Bardem’s first wife, all reduced to ashes when the house is burnt to the ground. In the ashes Bardem finds a burnished crystal, mounts it in his study giving him the faith and inspiration to continue creating poetry. Uninvited sinister guests Ed Harris and Michelle Pfeiffer are readily accepted by Bardem and welcomed to stay despite protestations by Lawrence. Here Bardem treats them like family, boosting his own egoistical eccentricities while treating his wife with disregard, everything she says and does is wrong. More of the couple’s relatives arrive, more questions arise and Lawrence’s house is overrun and almost destroyed. She is tormented by Pfeiffer who questions her ability to have a baby. With some semblance of tranquility she becomes pregnant but in the second half of Mother, it is all downhill. Clever cinematography by Aronofsky, relentlessly using hand held close ups of Lawrence as her misery increases and her life spirals out of control. With an explosive ending we start at the beginning again - as if nothing had ever happened. At selected cinemas from September 14 - Review by Graeme McCoubrie

Rock of Ages From Page 31 Only the music of hit bands Starship, Pat Benetar, Twisted Sister, Europe, Whitesnake and more hold the answer. Performance Details: Until September 16 Venue: Doncaster Playhouse, 679 Doncaster Rd, Doncaster Bookings: http://www.phoenixtheatre company.org/ - Cheryl Threadgold

● Hayley Nissan (Sherrie) and David Torr (Stacee Jaxx) in Rock of Ages.

Shania retrospective

● Cassandra Daly (foreground) with Tegan Thorogood (left), Jill Chrisp, Gabby Flood, Rachel Singer, Sarah Reuben and Amalie O'Hara. Photo: Jamie Breen. Why Shania? Shania rhymes with Choir! It ■ The Shania Choir, a Shania Twain Retrospective, can be seen on Friday, September 15 was almost too funny to ignore. Incidentally, and Saturday, September 16 at 9pm at the Fringe Shania Choir started as a joke two years ago, Hub, Lithuanian Club. with a group of friends coming together to perWeaving sassy country-pop stylings into a form From This Moment in four-part harmony capella harmonies, Shania Choir is a group of at a friend's gig. From there, the show was born. singers united by a love for leopard print and Under the musical direction of Alex Morris, armed with the prerogative to have a little fun, the choir is made up of friends, and friends of and the personal and professional life of Shania friends, and 90 per cent of the choir are actually Twain will be explored through song, dance and from Perth, WA. drag. Performance Dates: September 15 and16 After a successful season at Perth's Fringe Times: 9pm (55 minutes) World earlier this year, Shania Choir are exVenue: Fringe Hub - Lithuanian Club, Main cited to bring this show home to Melbourne. Enjoy hits such as Man I Feel Like a Woman, Theatre Tickets: Full $25 / Concession, Group, Early From This Moment and That Don’t Impress Me Bird $20 Much. To Book visit www.melbournefringe.com.au/ Choir members have been hand picked from all over Australia and are looking forward to event/shania-choir/ or call 9660 9666. being part of the Fringe Festival. - Cheryl Threadgold

Anarchic feminist ■ New Zealand performance artist Julia Croft is presenting two feminist solos in two separate performances as part of the Melbourne Fringe Festivalat Arts House, North Melbourne. Julia is arriving directly from Edinburgh where she was shortlisted for the prestigious Total Theatre award for best emerging artist. The solos have been created by Julia under the direction of Virginia Frankovich. The first, If there’s not dancing at the revolution, I’m not coming ... is a contemporary performance collage of iconic film scripts, pop songs, advertisements, costumes and dance all stretched, teased, shattered, and reassembled in order to challenge the treatment of women’s bodies as spectacle in popular culture. The second, Power Ballad, created and performed by Julia and directed by Nisha Madhan, and is an angry, feminist, live art investigation of language and its sometimes hidden ideologies. Part performance lecture, part karaoke party; Power Ballad deconstructs gendered linguistic histories and aims to rip apart contemporary language to find a new articulation of plea-

● New Zealand performer Julia Croft. sure, anger and femaleness. Power Ballad: September 23 – Using an 80s soundtrack, 30, Tues – Sat at 9pm, Sun 8pm Power Ballad is anarchic, loud Venue: Fringe Hub, Arts and political filled with femi- House, Studio 1, 521 nist rage and Annie Lennox. Performance Dates If Queensberry St, North There’s Not Dancing At the Melbourne. Bookings: www.melbourne Revolution, I’m Not Coming: September 15 – 22, Tues– Sat fringe.com.au - Cheryl Threadgold 9pm, Sun 8pm

The Club

● Former Club President, Jock (Bob Tyers) emphasises the Club's past greatness in a bid to highlight the failings of the others, Photo: David Belton ■ Heidelberg Theatre Company presents David Williamson’s The Club until September 23 at 36 Turnham Ave, Rosanna. Set in the 1970s in the Board room of an Australian Rules football club, Williamson’s satirical play perceptively captures the backstabbing and power politics at a time when the Australian Rules game was becoming more professional. Things are changing, with the club having paid $90,000 for young Tasmanian recruit Geoff Hayward (Abhi Parasher) who is not playing well. We learn of Geoff’s disillusionment with the game as being ‘macho and competitive’, but unless his attitude changes, the club’s poor results will mean the end for dedicated coach Laurie (Andy Fry). Laurie is popular with his players, and team captain Danny (Andrew Rance) says the players will strike in protest if their coach has to resign. Administrator Gerri (Jennifer Mettner) appears at first to be the peace-keeper, but soon makes it obvious she has her own agenda to achieve a premiership for the xlub. Club President Ted’s (Darren Gregor) alleged assault on a woman sees him pressured to resign, while past President, footballer and coach Jock’s (Bob Tyers) has principles and beliefs from a bygone era that add to the entertaining mix. Director Gavin Williams’s cast bring the colourful characters alive beautifully, realistically conveying the social issues presented in Williamson’s play that remain relevant 40 years later. Set design by Owen Evans, with the view of a grandstand through the windows, creates atmosphere, as do Wendy Drowley’s era authentic 1970s costumes. It is a nice touch to see a female play the traditionally male role of administrator Gerry, and all cast members do great work in delivering their roles. Special mention should be made of Bob Tyers’s (Jock) down-to-earth, spirited performance, and Andy Fry’s convincing portrayal of coach Laurie. Heidelberg Theatre Company has a fine reputation for presenting quality productions and this Australian classic play, presented at the right time in Melbourne’s footy season, is no exception. Performance details: Until September 23 Venue: Heidelberg Theatre, 36 Turnham Ave., Rosanna Bookings: 9457 4117 or www.htc.org.au - Review by Cheryl Threadgold


Page 34 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Observer Showbiz

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Movies, DVDs with Jim Sherlock, Aaron Rourke What’s Hot and What’s Not in Blu-Rays and DVDs FILM: BECOMING BOND: Genre: Biography/Comedy/Drama. Cast: George Lazenby, Josh Lawson, Kassandra Clementi. Year: 2017. Rating: M. Length: 92 Minutes. Stars: *** Verdict: The story of George Lazenby, the Australian car mechanic who, through an unbelievable set of circumstances, replaced the legendary Sean Connery by landing the role of James Bond 007 in "On Her Majesty's Secret Service" (1969), despite having never acted a day in his life, then after being offered the next seven Bond films and a $1 million signing bonus, he turned it all down. Hugely engaging and entertaining biographical-comedy-docu-drama has George Lazenby telling the story in his own words, and tongue firmly in his cheek. Funny, raunchy, sad, involving and even poignant, you can't help but be charmed by Lazenby's charismatic presence and captivating story-telling ability, all aided by a wealth of news and interview footage, re-enacted sequences and behind-the-scenes material. But at the end of it all, one is still left to wonder "Why?" and "What IF?." FILM: PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN - DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES: Genre: Action/Adventure/Fantasy. Cast: Johnny Depp, Javier Bardem, Geoffrey Rush, David Wenham, Keira Knightley, Orlando Bloom, Paul McCartney (as Uncle Jack). Year: 2017. Rating: M. Length: 129 Minutes. Stars: *** Verdict: This fifth outing for Captain Jack Sparrow finds the winds of ill-fortune blowing even more strongly when deadly ghost pirates led by his old nemesis, Captain Salazar, escape from the Devil's Triangle, and determined to kill every pirate at sea...including him, and Captain Jack's only hope of survival lies in seeking out the legendary Trident of Poseidon, a powerful artefact that gives the power of total control over the seas. Directed this time by Norwegian due Joachim Ronning and Espen Sandberg, who gave us the superb 2012 film "Kon-Tiki," everything about this swashbuckling saga is BIG, big sets, production design, big cast, eye-popping action, jaw-dropping CGI special effects, and plenty of pyrotechnics, it's all there, and then sum, as Jack Sparrow staggers and swaggers his way around the Caribbean defying all the odds. This outrageously outlandish epic is something Cecil B. De Mille or Errol Flynn would be doing if they were alive and well today. Typical of Johnny Depp's character and charisma he gives his usual Jack Sparrow performance with Marlon Brando style verbal mumbo-jumbo, and the remaining cast, most notably Javier Bardem as Captain Salazar and Geoffrey Rush as Captain Hector Barbossa, are all having fun. Not without its flaws, it's not the cinematic equivalent of Picaso or Rembrant, but whatever caught the imagination in the previous four adventures remains pretty much in-tact here.You don't need to be a rocket scientist to find something to enjoy in this illogical and loud swashbuckling roller-coaster ride, a recipe that Hollywood has been doing for around 100 years, and will no doubt continue to do so. FILM: THE MUMMY - 2D + 3D: Genre: Action/Adventure/Fantasy. Cast: Tom Cruise, Russell Crowe (Dr. Henry Jekyll), Sofia Boutella (Ahmanet). Year: 2017. Rating: M. Length: 110 Minutes. Stars: **½ Verdict: A former U.S. Military officer, or Soldier of Fortune, (Tom Cruise) unintentionally unearths the tomb of Princess Ahmanet, and becomes haunted and possessed after she puts a curse on him, enter Dr. Henry Jekyll (Russell Crowe), as she unleashes all sorts of terror and destruction that defy human comprehension. The first instalment in the (Unversal) Dark Universe film series, this is not a good start for this reboot of "The Mummy" franchise, an unengaging, dull and tiresome seen it all too many times before in other forms: it's Mission Impossible meets Raiders of the Lost Ark, meets An American Werewolf in London, meets The Walking Dead, meets The Evil Dead ... all classics for a reason.It's all there, the globetrotting locations, the Mission Impossible style action, falling buildings, massive CGI effects, but through it all remains flat and unexciting, doesn't do what horror should do, be scary. At least the Brendan Fraser "Mummy" trilogy with: The Mummy (1999), The Mummy Returns (2001), The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (2008), was a fun experience, where this new "Tom Cruise" formulaic nuts and bolts effort fails. Even the classic Abbott & Costello Meet The Mummy (1955) was far more scary and ultimately entertaining! If you haven't experienced the catch the original The Mummy (1932) starring Boris Karloff, and Hammer's The Mummy (1959) with Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee. - James Sherlock

Rourke’s Reviews: Handmaiden ■ (R). 144/167 minutes. Coming soon to Blu-Ray and DVD. After making his Hollywood debut in 2013 with the stylishly disturbing Stoker, director Park Chanwook (Old Boy, Thirst) returns to his roots with The Handmaiden, and his many fans will see that he has lost none of his ability to capture the dark, macabre side of human nature. Set in the 1930s, when Korea was under Japanese occupation, the story centres on Sook-hee (Kim Tae-ri, making her feature film debut), a talented pickpocket who works with her family, all experienced con-artists themselves. When a local swindler (Ha Jung-woo) offers a proposal that could prove incredibly lucrative, Sook-hee sees this as a chance to live a more luxurious life. The plan will involve her becoming the handmaiden to Japanese heiress Lady Hideko (Kim Min-hee), and slowly influencing the timid woman to accept the advances of the swindler, who will be posing as a Japanese Count. Once the two elope, the duo will steal Hideko's fortune, but as the scheme begins to play out, complications start to arise. Based on the acclaimed 2002 novel by Sarah Waters (which was also turned into a 2005 BBC miniseries), this certainly follows the basic outline of the source material, but screenwriters Chung Seokyung and Chan-wook twist and turn it into something all their own, creating a dark fable that lives and breathes within its culturally specific setting. Serpentine in structure, there is delicious fun to be had in seeing what dastardly deed will be inflicted next, and every performance perfectly captures the characters' desires and duplicities. Min-Hee (Moby Dick / Very Ordinary Couple) and Tae-ri are extraordinary, deflecting elements that could have been sleazy with noticeable skill. The sex scenes are explicit (and are reminiscent of the recent French film Blue Is The Warmest Colour), but never feel gratuitous or exploitative. Super star Jung-woo (The Chaser / The Yellow Sea) acquits himself well, Jin-woong makes the most of his role as the crazed Uncle, and it's great to see veteran Moon So-ri (Oasis / Peppermint Candy) on the big screen, and is a treat to watch. All this Dangerous Liaisonsstyle treachery has been beautifully realised by a talented crew of exceptional craftspeople, and Chanwook himself is in fine form, blending the grotesque with the blackly humorous with a typically masterful hand. His only mis-step occurs during a fifteen minute segment which recaps the story from a different angle. It is an unnecessary diversion, slightly muting Chan-wook's otherwise impressive storytelling skills. Hopefully like the superb UK release, this will contain both the theatrical and extended versions of the film.

Deepwater Horizon

■ (M). 107 minutes. Now available on Blu-Ray and DVD. This polished, high-octane feature from actor-turned-director Peter Berg (Very Bad Things / Friday Night Lights / The Kingdom) is one that raises mixed emotions. On one hand it is a superbly produced, excitingly executed action extravaganza that keeps the viewer on the edge of their seat, delivering the kind of thrills that mark the best films of the disaster genre, such as The Poseidon Adventure and (more appropriately) The Towering Inferno. On the other hand, you begin to feel guilty enjoying what you are watching on screen, as it continues to hit you that this is based on a true story that was tragic in so many ways. Based on the biggest oil disaster in US history, the film covers the moments leading up to the horrifying destruction that occurred on the massive oil rig. We are given a quick tour of the off-shore location and its inhabitants, namely Mike Williams (Mark Wahlberg), rig chief Jimmy Harrell (Kurt Russell), console operator Andrea Fleytas (Gina Rodriguez), and BP rep Vidrine (John Malkovich, sporting a hilariously over-the-top southern accent). The early scenes between Williams and his family are effective if overly calculated, while the banter between workmates feels real and frequently amusing, even if all the characters come across as rather one-dimensional. If certain roles do resonate, it is due to the work of the actors involved rather than the script given to them. Wahlberg is once more a reliable presence (this pairing between star and director works better than the uncomfortable misfire Patriots' Day), but the film is stolen by veteran Russell (also recently seen in the blockbusters The Fate Of The Furious and Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2), who embodies the honest, continually frustrated Harrell with the kind of comforting humanity that big business forever lacks. Director Berg, who normally uses the often intolerable shakycam format, thankfully employs a more classical approach this time, and the film is immeasurably better because of it. Added to that, the fact that massive sets were built in order to carry out action scenes as practically as possible, and what you have is a surprisingly old-fashioned disaster film that delivers fast-paced, adrenaline-fuelled entertainment. Not surprisingly, this large-scale tribute reminds one of Ron Howard's Backdraft (including the presence of Russell), another technically impressive feature that turned everyday workers into larger-than-life superheroes. Despite the uneasy feelings of enjoying slick, big-screen spectacle that is based on real-life tragedy, Deepwater Horizon achieves its very specific goals, and Irwin Allen would have definitely given his nod of approval to the end result. RATING - *** - Aaron Rourke

Top 10 Lists SEPTEMBER 10-16 THE AUSTRALIAN BOX OFFICE TOP TEN: 1. THE HITMAN'S BODYGUARD. 2. AMERICAN MADE. 3. GIRL'S TRIP. 4. DUNKIRK. 5. ANNABELLE: CREATION. 6. THE DARK TOWER. 7. HAMPSTEAD. 8. ALI'S WEDDING. 9. GIFTED. 10. CELEBRATE STUDIO GIBILI. NEW RELEASES AND COMING SOON TO CINEMAS AROUND AUSTRALIA: SEPTEMBER 7: IT, NAMATJIRA PROJECT, THE DINNER, THE GLASS CASTLE, THE LOVERS, THE MIMIC, TOMMY'S HONOUR, TWENTY TWO. SEPTEMBER 14: AMAZON ADVENTURE 3D, AMERICAN ASSASSIN, I AM NOT YOUR NEGRO, MEMBERS ONLY, MOTHER! PATTI CAKE$, RIP TIDE, THE EMOJI MOVIE. THE DVD AND BLU-RAY TOP RENTALS & SALES: 1. THE MUMMY [Action/Adventure/Fantasy/ Tom Cruise, Annabelle Wallis, Russell Crowe]. 2. GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY: Volume 2 [Sci-Fi/Action/Adventure/Chris Pratt]. 3. THE SHACK [Drama/Fantasy/Sam Worthington, Octavia Spencer]. 4. JOHN WICK 2 [Action/Crime/Thriller/ Keanu Reeves, Ian McShane]. 5. BECOMING BOND [Biography/Comedy/ George Lazenby, Josh Lawson]. 6. FREE FIRE [Action/Crime/Comedy/ Sharlto Copley, Brie Larson, Armie Hammer]. 7. WAKEFIELD [Drama/Bryan Cranston, Jennifer Garner, Beverly D'Angelo]. 8. ALIEN COVENANT [Action/Thriller/Sci-Fi/ Michael Fassbender, Katherine Waterston]. 9. GET OUT [Mystery/Thriller/Daniel Kaluuya, Allison Williams, Bradley Whitford]. Also: BAYWATCH, KING ARTHUR: LEGEND OF THE SWORD, COLOSSAL, THEIR FINEST, KONG: SKULL ISLAND, THE ZOOKEEPER'S WIFE, A DOG'S PURPOSE, SNATCHED, GHOST IN THE SHELL, DENIAL. NEW RELEASE HIGHLIGHTS ON DVD THIS WEEK: NORMAN [Drama/Thriller/Richard Gere]. PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES [Adventure/Johnny Depp. NEW RELEASE HIGHLIGHTS ON BLU-RAY THIS WEEK: PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES [Adventure/Johnny Depp]. NEW & RE-RELEASE AND CLASSIC MOVIES HIGHLIGHTS: TO BE OR NOT TO BE (1942 - Carole Lombard, Jack Benny]. NEW RELEASE TELEVISION, DOCUMENTARY AND MUSIC HIGHLIGHTS: VEEP: Season 6. VERA: Season 7. - James Sherlock


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 35

YEA & DISTRICT HISTORY & HERITAGE EXHIBITION

Major Exhibition of the Yea & District Historical Society Collection and including ☛ Val Borrie's Heritage Wedding Gown Collection ☛ Paul Bannan's Extensive Australian Military Collection ☛ Frank Philp's Amazing Collection of Vintage Radios and Radiograms

Yea Shire Hall Saturday September 16 & Sunday September 17 10am - 4pm. Entry $5


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Page 36 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 Melbourne

Observer

Lovatts Crossword No 37 Across

Across

1. Most private (thoughts) 6. Eyeball membrane 11. Pond plants 15. Made anew (2-7) 20. Impact sound 21. Genuine thing, the real ... 22. Hawaiian island 23. Paralysis disease 25. Woman's betrothed 26. ... & dime 27. Nodules 29. Artlessness 32. Easiest choice, ... option 34. Chess castle 36. Sparkled 39. From Emerald Isle 41. Call in on 43. Male duck 46. Provide (food) (3,2) 48. Dinners or lunches 49. Manufactured 51. Concept 52. Endlessly 55. Space flight organisation 56. Bucket 59. Humble (oneself) 61. Set of rules 62. Be introduced to 63. Animal welfare group (1,1,1,1,1) 64. Doctor's ... manner 67. Award ribbon 68. Ghastly 70. Encrusted 71. Black Sea port 72. Not as much 73. Sharpshooter, Annie ... 74. From Lone Star state 75. Line touching curve 77. Onward 78. Putrid 79. Revolve on axis 82. Crudely hearty 86. In flight 87. Acceptable 89. Car distance gauges 92. Immense time spans 94. Sauteed 96. Pollution haze 98. Tailless feline, ... cat 100. Hang unlawfully 101. Female sheep 103. Identify 105. Cathedral, ... Dame 106. ... & twos 108. Yoga master 111. Classic painting, ... Lisa 112. Survives longer than 114. Leaving workforce 116. Chilled 119. Japan & Korea are there 120. Cake level 121. Career sportsperson 123. Model, ... Macpherson 124. Acorn trees 125. Consequently 126. Capacity to remember 127. News 130. Maiden name indicator 131. Sinking in middle 135. Bequeath 138. Cocktail, ... colada 139. Capricorn zodiac symbol 141. Parmesan & basil sauce 144. Chasm 146. Golfing body (1,1,1) 147. Biblical first man 148. Meadow (poetic) 149. Intelligence 150. High spirits 151. Unseen observer, fly on the ... 152. Deep ditch 153. Baby bird shelter 155. The N of NB 157. Peacock's mate 158. Siamese 160. Information services 161. Power pole 162. Intoxicated 163. The M of YMCA (3'1) 165. Poisonous tree-snake 166. Liqueur, ... Maria 167. Uncertainties 168. Smooths 169. Dissolve 171. Steak cut (1-4)

172. Heavy horned animal 175. Jogs 176. Boys 179. X, Y or Z 180. Be defeated 182. Upon 184. Abrupt 185. Destitute 186. In the manner of (1,2) 188. Jazz legend, ... Fitzgerald 189. Rabble 190. Sacred 191. The self 193. Olden days, days of ... 194. Narrow roads 196. Type of lily 197. Defendant's bond money 198. Collier 200. Hawkers 205. Unwell 207. Moneylenders 210. Machinery serviceman 211. Captivated 212. Arabian sultanate 213. ... & papa 214. Vapour 216. Irish sweater style 218. Lots of 219. Imminent 220. Drawing up roughly 224. Comfortable chair 227. Jump 229. Mad Roman emperor 230. Adolescent 231. Honourable 232. Amateur radio enthusiasts 233. Church celebration 235. Fume-filled 237. Stagger 239. Actress, ... Russo 241. South American dance 244. Different 246. Embroils 249. Former Soviet region (1,1,1,1) 252. Complained 254. Gloss 256. Beatle, John ... 258. Angrier 259. Crazy 260. Herb garnish 263. Grow quickly, ... up 264. Knaves 265. Shotgun lead 267. Reduced, ... down 270. Homing bird 271. Slid 272. Outshine 273. Irish lass 274. Undisguised 277. Rotated 279. Heroic tale 281. House lizard 284. Just OK (2-2) 286. Spiders' traps 288. Was expert (in) 292. Deck over water 294. Arranges, ... up 295. Grieve 298. Sticker 300. Sultan's wives 301. Colorado ski resort 303. Volley of bullets 306. Exhale & inhale 308. Scarce as ... teeth (3'1) 309. Successor 311. Stingiest 314. Chilly 315. Clash 316. Flamenco instrument 317. Remove from washing-line 318. Deceased 319. Mosquito-like pest 320. Belgrade native 321. Afro or beehive 322. Spectacle glasses 323. Moaned wearily 324. Secrets, ... in the cupboard

Down 1. Terrible tsar 2. Hitler follower 3. More mature 4. Stares lasciviously at 5. Pairs 6. Weaving fibre 7. Gives off 8. Lit 9. Alters 10. Undeniable (facts) 11. Bobcats 12. Comedian, ... Ball 13. Nailfile (board) 14. Bar 15. Skating arena 16. Get by begging 17. Painter's stand 18. Pour with rain 19. Achievement 24. Singer, ... Redding 28. Dashing style 30. Small horse breed 31. Competes 33. Go too far with 35. Equal (2,1,3) 37. Vipers 38. Chopper actor, ... Bana 40. Retaliates (4,4) 42. Religious statues 44. Logic 45. Predicament, fine ... of fish 47. Uluru, formerly ... Rock 48. Long race 49. Distinguished conductor 50. Computer input (4,5) 53. Charged with bubbles 54. Metal extraction plant 57. Electrical device 58. Barristers 60. Ocean phase (3,4) 63. Easily 65. Viewed speculatively 66. Anxious 68. Engage (with) 69. Rove 76. Bigger 79. Exercise club 80. Majestic 81. Musical notes 83. Royal racecourse 84. Less wild 85. Japanese currency 88. Classifying 90. Confesses, ... up 91. Jug 93. Treat with O2 95. Concave mark 97. Constantly busy (2,3,2) 99. Mindless 100. Hair parasites 102. Street urchins 104. One's school, alma ... 107. Fool 109. Fish lungs 110. ... spumante 111. Timbuktu is there 113. Deceive (lover)(3-4) 115. Competitor 117. Ding ... dell 118. Remove peel from 121. Fine 122. Pizza herb 127. Taut 128. River-mouth triangle 129. Parent's mother 132. Embassy bosses 133. Absurd 134. Desexes 135. Fleeting 136. Spotted dog 137. Closets 138. Long thin cigar 140. Mushroom relative 141. Alias 142. Groups' representatives 143. Tyrant

Down 145. Squander, ... away 151. FA Cup stadium 154. Wooden beams 156. Eye-watering vegetable 159. Fuss, ... & cry 164. Bushranger, ... Kelly 169. Complete task (3,2) 170. Architect, Frank ... Wright 173. Turning up (skirt) 174. Incapacitates (racehorse) 177. Positive electrode 178. Casseroles 181. Male rowers 183. Scottish emblem 187. Retriever dogs 192. French policemen 195. Atone for 199. Infuriate 201. TV award 202. Actress, ... Redgrave 203. Frighten 204. Ski-track 206. Singer, ... Abdul 207. Russian mountains 208. Sloped walkway 209. RisquĂŠ 213. Numerous 215. Pink-eyed rabbits 217. Loch ... Monster 221. Chops down 222. Bury 223. Biting fly 224. Authentic 225. Pursue 226. Pakistan's ... Khan 228. Legal trade bans 234. Compliance 236. Most avid 238. Conger 240. Convent sister 242. Diminishing 243. Early foetuses 245. Disillusions (4,4) 247. Uranus & Pluto's neighbour 248. Paris boulevard, Champs ... 250. Students 251. Wild ponies 253. Sunset 255. Utilised 257. Oil cartel 258. Moon about 261. Kremlin country 262. Responsible 265. Rounded stone 266. Drift (into coma) 268. Corrosive fluids 269. The D of AD 275. Take part in ballot 276. Frolic 278. Boosts morale 280. Ringing (of bell) 282. Famous English college 283. 21st birthday symbols 285. Cosmonaut, ... Gagarin 287. Summer shoe 289. Lucky amulets 290. Covered shopway 291. Mental pictures 292. Looked intently 293. Delight 296. Pig's grunts 297. Reimburse 299. Record's secondary track (1-4) 302. Introduce gradually, ... in 304. Abundant 305. Indistinct 306. Skin eruption 307. Hindu garment 308. London's ... Park 310. Polishes 312. Repeat 313. Soft knocks


Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 37

Solution on Page 29

MEGA CROSSWORD No 37 1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

20 23 29

30

32 40

50

34 42

43

52

60

44

45

53

66

94

110

111

114 121

128

136

137

146

155

172

179

180

185

186

187

173

182

214 221

229

252

222

254

306

307

286

287

297

298

225

208

209

233

234

240

241

249

242

250

251

257

258

262

263 267

268

269

270

273 279 289

290

280

281

291

300

292 301

315

316 319

293

302 309

322

218

227

248

261

217

226

232

278 288

299

318 321

224

308 314

178

193

216

266

277

296

192

207

272

285

177

199

215

247

260

276

295

191

256

271

284

164

184

198

255

265

275

176

239

259

274

163

238 246

264

151

183

231

245

253

143

206

223

230

244

134

211

220

243

133

168

205

213

237

132

157

197

204

236

118

124

150

190

196

203

219

117

175

189

195

142

156

174

210

235

109

162

181

188

194

141

167

171

228

108

116

140

161 166

170

212

100

107

149

154

160

202

99

123

148 153

159

201

93

115

139

147

165

200

86

131

138

152

169

85

130

145

58

126

129 135

144

84

122

125

57

69

92

106

113

120

127

83

91

105

112

119

56

77

90

104

38

73

98

103

19

63

97

102

37

55

76 82

89

96

36

68

81

88

95 101

80

18

28

72

79

17

48

67

75

87

16

35

47

54

71

78

15

62

74

158

46

61 65

14

27

33 41

70

13

26

51

64

12

22

25

31

59

11

21

24

39 49

10

303 310 317

320 323

324

304 311

282

283

294 305 312

313


Page 38 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Observer Victorian Sport Melbourne

Classy field for Golden Rose ■ Top Sydney trainer Gerald Ryan will saddle up the ruling favourite for the rich Golden Rose in Sydney on September 23 against a top class field of classy three year-olds. Menari was an impressive winner of the listed Rosebud over 1100 back on August 12. It is just favourite over the runner-up in the Blue Diamond Stakes at Caulfield back in February, in the classy colt Pariah. Pariah is prepared by two of the best, in Peter Snowden and his son Paul, and since resuming has showed that he is back to his best after his unplaced run in the Golden Slipper on a heavy track. He had been working well since resuming in great fashion. On the next line is the undefeated Victorian colt, Merchant Navy, in the care of top young Victorian trainer, Ciaron Maher. The son of Fastnet Rock has now put together four on end, since winning his first start at Pakenham. He then won at Sandown and was most impressive first up since April with a strong win at Caulfield over 1200 metres. On the same line is one of Darren Beadman's favourites, Kementari, after a four length win on May 27. Beadman, assistant to James Cummings at Godolphin, is most impressed with the threeyear-old. Another that has ability is the Hawkes team trained three-year -ld, Chauffer, a good second at his last start to the favourite, Menari. Of the others you have the Hayes-Dabernig trained Formality who won well in Sydney last start and Beau Geste, a good third at his last start. I like the way that Pariah is going, and the Maher camp is rapt in their colt, Merchant Navy, but, it is a tough race.

Ready to race

■ The William Inglis Company is gearing up for their big ‘Ready to Race’ sale at their magnificent complex at Oaklands on October 4. In all 158 youngsters will go under the hammer with some outstanding bloodlines In alphabetical order, some of the top young sires are well represented, such as All Too Hard, who is taking all before him. Melbourne Cup winner, Americain, who won the classic back in 2010, is showing plenty at stud. Bel Espirit, sire, of the undefeated great mare, Black Caviar, while another taking all before him is the American sire Bernardini. Choisir was a brilliant galloper, and showed plenty, including winning a classic sprint race in England. Another is former Cox Plate winner, So You Think, who has three colts to go under the hammer. One of the nicest looking stallions, So You Think, during his racing career was in the care of the master, Bart Cummings, and ran third to Americain in the 2010 Melbourne Cup. Star Witness, a Blue Diamond Stakes winner when prepared by Danny O'Brien, has two colts and a filly up for sale. Newmarket Handicap winner, Wanted, has a gelding out of Art and Craft, up for sale, while Victorian leading sire, Written Tycoon, has three nice colts ready to go under the hammer. While former sprint star, Zoustar, is represented by two colts, out of Jessica Rose and Queen's Elect. The ‘Ready to Race’ sale gets underway at 12 noon.

● Pariah in the Blue Diamond Stakes. Racing Photos ning Post and Best Bets, Tony Kneebone. The Committee is made up of The Age's Pat Bartley, who is be congratulated on becoming a Life Member of the Association; Mark Guest from Sky Channel; former Age man, Michael Sharkie; current Age rep Michael Lynch; and Bruce Clarke, formerly with TVN. Former Media Manager at Moonee Valley Racing Club, Leigh Newton, is now a member of the VRMA, and was recently appointed CEO of the Echuca Racing Club. Leigh also prepares articles for the race club website, the Country Racing website, the Riverina Herald and magazine articles. Black Caviar scholarship winner, Jessica Moodie, has been appointed Media and Communications Officer at Thoroughbred Breeders Victoria. Former Age eacing writer, Andrew Garvey has retired as Treasurer of the VRMA, after 25 years of devoted service taking over from the late Des Spain, congratulations are in order. After the Annual General Meeting, members were invited to a luncheon with the guest speaker, 1970 Brownlow medallist and Shield cricketer, Peter Bedford. A very entertaining day.

Ted Ryan

Greg re-elected

■ The Victorian Racing Media Association had its Annual General meeting at the Emerald Hotel in South Melbourne with former number one race caller, Greg Miles, re-elected Chairman. The Vice Presidents were re-elected also: two well-known names in the racing world in RSN's Deane Lester, and the Editor of the Win-

● Unbeaten colt Merchant Navy. Racing Photos

www.MelbourneObser ver.com.au

Wine Column Coonawarra doyen

■ The first time that I met Peter Douglas, one of the genuine doyens of Coonawarra winemakers, was in Hobart many, many years ago. He was thoroughly enjoying the meal in one of best seafood restaurants in a seafood capital, but the food didn't really go with the great reds he was there to show off. I met him again a few years later, in his then homebase of Wynns Coonawarra Estate, where the food was much more up the alley of the superb red wines he was producing. Yet he was still a bit twitchy. It was harvest time. And he confessed he was only in the dining room talking to scribblers because he'd been ordered to, because that was the way of the world for the modern corporate winemaker. So we alighted to the winery, where he was much happier. And we watched and tasted premium cabernet grapes as they were crushed, and he told me of his great love for the Coonawarra district and the fabulous red wines it produced. Peter long ago parted with the corporate world and Wynns, but, after stints in California and Sicily, returned to Coonawarra where he has worked with several smaller concerns, mostly on a consultancy basis, as well as setting up his own winemaking operation. One of the companies he has made wine for is DiGiorgo Family Wines, which was eventually established in Coonawarra by Stefano DiGiorgo, who migrated from Italy in 1952 and settled on South Australia's Limestone Coast. In 2002, the DiGiorgio family purchased the fabled Rouge Homme winery, the second oldest in Coonawarra and a truly iconic cog in the history of the Australian wine industry. Somewhat ironically, the Rouge Homme winery and its surrounding aged vines had at one stage been the property of Southcorp, which had owned Wynns during some of Peter Douglas's there as chief winemaker. If he had a wry smile as he entered the DiGeorgio operation, I'll certainly forgive Peter, whose familiarity with the district and his passion for its dry reds certainly comes through in the latest batch of wines I have tasted. The wines are, quite simply, outstanding and exhibit true varietal character and genuine regionality. WINE REVIEWS Di Giorgio Family 2015 Coonawarra Cabernet Sauvignon ($26) - I really like the typically elegant intensity of this cabernet, and its particularly fine structure, something that typifies Coonawarra. It's very nearly ready to drink on release - that is, right now - but I'd suggest that it's also very worthy of medium-term cellaring. Five or so years of bottle maturation will soften the palate and the wine's great length will deliver very desirable complexity. Di Giorgio Family 2015 Coonawarra Emporio ($26) - an elegant dry red blended from merlot, cabernet sauvignon and cabernet franc. Few Australian regions can deliver a Bordeaux blend of this quality, but Coonawarra can, especially in the hands of someone such as Peter Douglas. This red is already soft enough to drink and enjoy, especially with a hearty stew, but short-term cellaring certainly won't go amiss. WINE OF THE WEEK Sandalford 2017 Margaret River Classic ($15) - this blend of semillon and sauvignon blanc is indeed a Western Australian classic: a crisp, flinty dry white that you can comfortably drink on its own or with something like a plate of oysters or a lovely fresh piece of grilled white-fleshed fish such as bream. All you'll need with it is some green salad and a chuck of lemon. Just keep it simple and don't over-complicate with a richly flavoured sauce which will tend to smother the combination. - John Rozentals


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 39


Page 40 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Quantity Surveyors

Property depreciation services Just Depreciation is always going the extra mile to help all our clients whenever we can. We have decided to answer some of our frequently asked questions to help give you some advice and get a better understanding of our services to save you time and money. If, for any reason, there are still questions you would like to ask us about our property depreciation services then don’t hesitate to call our friendly team who would be only too happy to help. My property is old is it worthwhile getting a report prepared? Yes, all properties regardless of age have some form of depreciation. The fixtures and fittings in the property must be valued at the date that you first make the property available for rental. Just Depreciation recommend reports for all residential properties no matter how old the building may be. I have owned the property for a number of years and not claimed any depreciation, have I missed out? No, we will start your report from the first date of rental and your accountant can apply to the Taxation Office to get previous returns adjusted. It’s never too late to claim any property depreciation. How long does the report last for? Our reports have 10 years of detailed information and enough detail for your accountant to expand on the individual items after this date so you won't have to arrange for a another report unless you carry out major reno vations or improvements. Do you guarantee your report will be worthwhile? Yes of course, and we guarantee that if you do not receive a deduction that is twice the amount of our fee in the first year, then the report will be free. We believe this is the fairest and best possible outcome either way for our clients. What is the process? Do I have to make appointments? No, we make the appointments on your behalf via your rental manager and liaise with tenants for a suitable time for the property inspection so you need not worry about a thing. What happens at the inspection? We measure the property, take photos, take note of all depre ciable items and any capital building write off deductions that may apply and then return to the office to calculate and process the report.


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 41

DINDI SAWMILL Supplying Quality Hardwood Timber • STOCKYARD RAILS • BRIDGE TIMBER • FENCING MATERIAL • BUILDING MATERIALS • SPECIALTY BIG END TIMBERS, UP TO 8 METRES

5797 8349 Myles Road, Murrindindi Vic 3717 Fax: 5797 8499


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Page 42 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Eildon

Maintongoon

Alexandra

AUCTION

Immaculate home with brilliant shed! • The home offers, new wiring, concrete stumps, new gas heater & air-conditioning. • New floor coverings and has been freshly painted throughout. • There are 2 huge bedrooms, separate lounge/ dining area and lovely modern kitchen. • Fully lined bungalow with room for an enusite to be installed. • Colorbond shed has power, concrete floor and room for 2 cars, boat and work shop area. $249,000

Looking for that great escape • Peace and quiet on 10 acres of natural bushland • 3 bedrooms • Open plan design with lots of natural light, cosy wood combustion heater • Spectacular views of Lake Eildon and Mt. Buller from the lovely timber deck • Ample storage fresh rainwater, solar power and lock-up sheds $445,000

Alexandra

Perfect Country Home • 4 Bedroom 2 bathroom home on 15 acres • Master bedroom with BIR and ensuite with spa bath

AUCTION 7TH OCTOBER 2017 AT 11.00AM on site If not sold prior 5 PETERKIN PLACE ALEXANDRA PRIME INDUSTRIAL REAL ESTATE Ideal owner/occupier or commercial investment

• Large mezzanine floor, office, lunch room and bathroom • 3 Phase Power with CT Metering, separate fully enclosed insulated room • Zoned Industrial 1, endless opportunities CONTACT: BELINDA HOCKING 57723444 OR 0418 115 574

• Land size 1425m2 • Warehouse area 684m2, Skillion 125m2

Merton

• In ground Swimming pool and beautifully landscaped gardens • large sheds two fully lockable and Cattle yards. $760,000

Sales Specialists I Belinda Hocking 0418 115 574 Sales and Property Services I Jessica Bates 0437 533 236 Property Management I Sarah Brockhus 0457 537 222

Lifestyle living with Impressive views • 20 Acres of flat and rising hill country • Home offering 3 double bedrooms • Combustion wood heater & central ducted heating and cooling

• Double lock up garage, established gardens and dam $495,000

Landmark Harcourts Alexandra 56 Grant Street, Alexandra I 5772 3444

Yea

Cute Updated Cottage This one bedroom cottage is perfect for the first homebuyer, retired farmer or astute investor. Sited on approx. 613m2 and located within easy walking distance of all facilities the cottage has been re-stumped, painted inside/outside and has a new kitchen. There is a living room with sliding doors to a light filled open plan kitchen-diner, separate bathroom and bedroom. The rear garden has room for a possible extension and a large colourbond shed takes care of your storage.

Landmark Harcourts Yea 56 High Street, Yea I 5797 2799


www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017 - Page 43


Page 44 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, September 13, 2017

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au


Turn static files into dynamic content formats.

Create a flipbook
Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.