Melbourne Observer. 120404A. April 4, 2012. Part A. Pages 1-29, Pages 52-58

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■ Newly-weds Christie Whelan and Rohan Browne will co-star in The Producers, being staged as the first 2012 show in The Production Company’s season. They posed for our cameras at the big launch at Jeanne Pratt’s ‘Raheen’ masion, Kew. But first ... the couple leave this Friday for a 17-day honeymoon in Vietnam, after marrying PHOTO: ASH LONG last month. More news and photos of the launch - inside this week’s Melbourne Observer.

RCH GOOD FRIDAY APPEAL - PHONE EARLY ON 9292 1166

Page 2 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012

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Melbourne Observer

W hen you lose someone you love you don’ don’tt need someone telling you how it is is..

You need ggenuine enuine empathy and sup port. support. ement details Y ou need clear arrang arrangement details..

You need things done the way you want.

Most of all you need to ffeel eel included - lik amily. likee a ffamily.

How do we know?

Because that’ hat we do that’ss w what do..

T ender Moments - Tender Care

9369 4919 24 Hour Service Altona - Laverton - Werribee www.candlepines.com.au

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ASSAULT CASE BACK TO COURT

OBSERVER PAGE 3 BOYS

Naked Boys Singing in Melb.

■ The long-running off-Broadway hit show, Naked Boys Singing, Bris, Fight The Urge, Perky Little Porn Star, The Naked Maid and will be staged in Melbourne for two weeks from May 1 at the cak’s Song.

Naked Boys Singing ran for 3069 performances in its off-BroadBeckett Theatre, The Malthouse.

Eight all-singing, all-dancing Australian lads, all-naked, will way run. It is being directed and produced by Jonathan Worsley, perform: Tim Carney, Glenn Ferguson, Nicholas Gentile, Joshua choreographed by Adam Williams, and the musical director is Harrison, Chris McGovern, Mitchell Roberts, Elijah Rohner and Sheena Crouch.

Season: May 1-12. Tues.-Thurs. 8pm, Fri and Sat. 7pm and Tye Shepherd.

The musical revue incldues Gratuitous Nudity, The Bliss Of A 9pm. Tickets: $61.50, Conc. $51. VIP Premium: $78. ● Pictured (back row, from left): Chris McGovern, Joshua Harrison, Elijah Rohner, Tye Shepherd, Tim Carney (hand to head), Nicholas Gentile. (Front row): Glenn Ferguson, Mitchell Roberts (laying on stomach).

Melbourne

Observer

Breaking News

42-YEAR-OLD CARNAL KNOWLEDGE CHARGE HAUNTS LOCAL BUS DRIVER

By Our Court Roundsman

■ The Melbourne Observer is taking an Easter break. There will be no edition on April 11, but we will return on April 18. Our office re-opens at 9am on Wednesday, April 11. We take this opportunity to wish you a Happy and Reflective Easter 2012.

It’s All About You!

Melbourne

Observer In This 76-Page Edition

Melb. People: Been and Seen ............... Page 6 News: Sex offender back in Court .......... Page 9 Melb. Confidential: Brush with death ...... Page 9 Di Rolle: Comedy Festival fun ............. Page 10 Pictorial: Hush collection launch ......... Page 11 Long Shots: See you at the theatre ..... Page 12 Pictorial: Production Company launch ... Page 15 Nick Le Souef: Outback Legend .......... Page 16 Observer Reader Club: Birthdays ......... Page 18 Melbourne Trader: Free Ads ................ Page 29 Railway Feature: Nostalgia Special ...... Page 49 Independent Theatre Radio Confidential Comedy Festival Latest on Showbiz

Observer Showbiz

■ A 59-year-old commercial passenger cehivle driver has had to fight to have his accreditation renewed, after a public servant cancelled his licence because of a carnal knowledge offence 42 years ago.

Victorian Civil and Administrative Tribunal Vice-President Judge Pamela Jenkins heard that the man acknowledged in his 2007 application that he had an .05 conviction, and had been found guilty of carnal knowledge when he was 17.

Judge Jenkins was told that the man, known on Tribunal files as ‘BJC’, had been found guilty in the County Court in April 1970 of carnal knowledge of a girl between the ages of 10 and 16.

He was released on a good behaviour bond of $150 for 18 months.

The County Court transcript stated that the girl was 13, lied to the 17-yearold and said she was 16, and that the sexual intercourse was consensual.

Lee Johnston-Davy gave evidence that she had worked with the man between 2004 and 2010 for a charter bus operator, and that he had transported secondary students unsupervised, primary pupils on excursions, and other duties.

He was described as courteous and respectful, and received compliments.

The man’s wife said he had had worked as a relief driver with WestNet Inc, a day training centre for adults with intellectual and physical disabilities.

He had helped in community roles at Yea, the Tribunal heard,.

Judge Jenkins said there was “compelling evidence” that the man was technically competent and sufficiently fit and healthy to provide the service. She ordered that his licence be reinstated.

■ A new County Court trial, with a different judge, has been ordered after Anne Karatjas appealed a decision in her case against Deakin University.

Mrs Karatjas argues that Deakin University owed her a duty of care when she was allegedly attacked by a third party walking from the Burwood campus cafeteria to the car park.

Ms Karatjas was an employee of the contractor-run (Spotless) cafeteria at Deakin. She submitted to Supreme Court Judges Nettle, Hansen and Kyrou, sitting as the Court of Appeal, that the University had an obligation to provide a means of leaving her workplace without risks to health.

County Court Judge Cohen had previously decided that Deakin did not owe Mrs Karatjas a duty to take care to prevent her being assaulted.

The Court heard Deakin University retained Wilson Security to provide security on the campus, and employed two officers, 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

Prior to the attack, Mrs Karatjas said security officers had known about a man who was loitering.

Latest News Flashes Around Victoria

Teen dad avoids jail ■ A 15-year-old who drove a stolen car, evading police at up to 175km, with his pregnant girlfriend in the passenger seat, has avoided youth detention.

Another complaint ■ Albury Deputy Mayor Neville Hull is the subject of another Code of Conduct complaint which is tipped to explode before elections in September.

Horsham drug contest ● Judge Pamela Jenkins

■ Bradley Werner, 32, will contest an allegation he possessed a friend's prescription drugs, found in his car.

Mike McColl Jones

Top 5 THE TOP 5 REAL REASONS WHY THE MELBOURNE OBSERVER TAKES A BREAK AT EASTER 5. The editor is booked in for therapy.

4. To allow the typewriter ribbons to be dry cleaned.

3. To let our photographic dept put a new film in the company Box Brownie.

2. The delivery vehicles need fresh horses.

1. We can!

Page 4 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012

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Mark Richardson ♥

Straight from the heart

E-Mail: mark@localmedia.com.au

MEET COMEDIAN SIMON TAYLOR Psychological Porch Thoughts ■ Award-winning Melbourne-bred comedian Simon Taylor is one comedian delving deep into our minds at the 2012 Melbourne International Comedy Festival with his highly acclaimed show, 10 Things I Know About You. Simon's show was inspired by his love for psychology and enthusiasm for the human mind that he has cleverly turned into a show about morality, happiness and love.

Simon recently won the prestigious Under Wing Award, one of Australia's top comedy prizes awarded to emerging performers; past winners include Tim Minchin, Sammy J and Tom Dickens.

Visiting Simon's 'Porch' at The Butterfly Club in South Melbourne, I discovered 10 things we should know about Simon - making his show one of the most intelligent and funniest in this years' festival.

1. He loves psychology. 2. He is a full-time comedian. 3. He's an experienced presenter. 4. He's the Victorian Poetry Slam Champion. 5. He's worked with children with autism. 6.

He's a columnist. 7. He's a song writer 8. He's an improviser. 9. He's knows magic. 10. He wears skinny jeans.

You graduated with a major in psychology from Melbourne University, what was the psychology behind becoming a writer and performer?

I decided to spend my life starving so I moved into the arts. I essentially saw that I had a choice between trying to understand people while sitting at a university office I while on a stage.

I chose the latter because it's a more exciting world from momentto-moment and there is a sort of purity in how one engages an audience.

You are highly sought after by science groups and academics to present your niche understanding of psychology - what is your niche understanding of psychology?

I can communicate things that entertainers learn about people in the academic terms I learnt at uni. I'm certainly not a guru on anything; I just have a rare connection between both worlds.

What is your show actually about?

It's about trying to understand people. It showcases a struggle to work out what it means to be human, despite my desperate need to

● Simon at The Butterfly Club in South Melbourne and why? and watch Law & Order when I have Justin Hamilton. His writing is more time. so rich and well crafted. I find that I For anyone who hasn't donned learn something new from him each a pair of 'skinny jeans', what are time I see him. their unique selling points?

Which comedians are you planThey're great for making the ning to see during the Comedy Fes- statement: "I'm a part of a ridiculous tival? subculture".

Justin Hamilton's show The If you could invite anyone to Goodbye Guy, Tegan Higginbotham your 'Porch' who would it be and - Million Dollar Tegan, Jimmy why?

James Eaton - One Small Sketch I did think at first that it would be For Man, Nick Cody - Sinful Think- Germaine Greer. I read her book, ing and Comedy Zone (particularly The Female Enuch, when I was 15 to see Khaled Khalafalla) and am still dealing with it. I have a You are the current Victorian few things I'd like to clear up. HowPoetry Slam Champion and you ever, it would have to be Stephen have performed your poetry along Fry. If I don't meet that man at some side Australia's top poets, what was point in my life, my death bed will your winning poem about? be wet with tears.

It was about language and actuWhat is your Porch thought of ally features in the current show. The the day? poem describes everything I love 'i' before 'e'…except for when you about the way we communicate with run a feisty heist on a weird beige each other in both spoken and writ- foreign neighbour. ten language.

■ Simon Taylor performs 10 What are immediate plans fol- Things I know About You, The Butlowing the Comedy Festival? terfly Club, 204 Bank Street, South I've been offered a number of Melbourne until April 22. places to perform interstate and overTimes: 8pm Tues/Wed/Sun, 9pm seas so I have to pick carefully. I'd Thurs/Fri/Sat like to go everywhere and do everyBookings: www.thebutterfly thing, but then again I did promise club.com my housemate I'd hang out at home - Mark Richardson

● Comedian Simon Taylor Photos: Murray Howard-Brooks overanalyse everything about psychology!

Interrupted Porch Thoughts with comedian Nicolette Minster Do you believe we can all be happy?

■ Making her highly anticipated standIf we can get video footage of little up debut at this year's festival, comedy kittens to everyone in the world, then star Nicolette Minster (Comedy Chanyes.Yes we can. nel) is fired up for her first ever twoWhose minds do you delve into some alongside Louise Joy McCrae for material?

(Rove, World War Wonderful!) dishing My own. I spend a lot of time ruout nonstop laughs in their hysterical minating on things that people with a hour of original sketches in their show day job don't get to.

Girls Uninterrupted at the Forum TheHow long did it take to write the atre until April 22. Special cameo apshow? pearance by Simon Taylor.

A few months. The title came first Nicolette's Porch Thought: "In comactually, after watching the movie 10 edy I've learnt the glass half empty proThings I Hate About You. I just liked vides masses of material yet still conthe sound of it. My next show has a tains enough drinkable content to soften title already, so the tough part is out the blow of it containing less than you'd of the way…I think. ● Comedians Louise Joy McCrae and Nicolette Minster hoped."

Who is your favourite comedian

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 - Page 5

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Showbiz News

Financial Planning

THEATRE HELPING MENTAL HEALTH Briefs

By Cheryl Threadgold Melbourne Observer Chief Theatre Critic

Finger food

■ President of Beaumaris Theatre, Janine Chugg (pictured), has just returned from presenting a paper at the sixth International Technology, Education and Development Conference, held at the Melià Hotel, Valencia, Spain.

A professional mental health clinician and active clinical supervisor, Janine co-wrote the paper with colleague Derith Harris.

The paper was titled Using Performance to Highlight Real Life – Collaboration Between a Theatre and Health Services to Develop Clinical Skills – an Australian Experience.

Last year Janine’s community theatre company successfully collaborated with four large mental health services in Victoria to be part of a strategy providing a course for mental health clinicians in clinical supervision.

Under Janine’s direction, actors were filmed re-enacting various hypothetical scenarios encountered in a clinical supervision relationship.

The film vignettes’ topics included the disengaged supervisor, conflict in the role of supervisor, demonstrating good clinical supervision, a breach of confidentiality regarding Facebook, a conflict in purpose from manager and supervisor, engaging the supervisee from the supervisor’s perspective and reporting unprofessional behavior to a manager.

Janine says “Each presenter at the conference had only 12 minutes to present, which did provide a challenge when minutes of video footage were included, but the paper was well received.

■ Healthy Snacks Australia, food manufacturer of Moorabbin, has been fined $60,000 after a worker’s finger was severed in a health food bar machine.

The worker was cleaning the machine while it was still operating.

with Jon and Andrew Rancie of Rancie McLean Financial Planning Level 4, 420 Collins Street, Melbourne Vic 3000 Phone: 9671 4990

Dollar Cost Averaging Does It Work?

● Janine Chugg Photo: Malcolm Threadgold “The conference itself was very interesting and stimulating and well worth the 30 hours’ travel time to get there and 24 hours to get home.”

Congratulations to Janine, firstly on her innovative project which successfully merged community theatre with health services for educational purposes, but also for the honor of being invited to take the world stage and present her paper in Spain.

NOT OVER UNTIL GOAL ATTACK SINGS Welcome Piper

● Piper Ashley Laver: 3.3kg, 51cm ■ Michelle Stamper is one of the most popular women in Melbourne’s showbiz fraternity ... but ‘Stamps’ has had to stand aside as the spotlight shines on newly-arrived daughter Piper Ashley Laver, who arrived on Monday last week (March 26).

Michelle is Publicity Director for the Nine Network in Melbourne, and she and partner Paul Laver are welcoming young Piper - as are their ● Paul Laver and Michelle Stamper many friends.

Opportunity knocks ■ A West Heidelberg opportunity shop, desperate to stay in business, is willing to pay people for good quality donations. Church Bargain Shop, in The Mall, is making the offer for April. Phone: Rachel Rei, 9455 0480

● From left: Katey Radcliffe, Eva Anagnostou, Frederica Cunningham, Georgia Brooks, Mandy Lyn Brook, Janet Todd, with Rebecca Rashleigh in front.

■ In sport-mad Melbourne, it makes ‘I have tried in the music sense that a new opera should be about the world of netball. to create a sense of the That's the view of contemporary commovement and energy poser Angus Grant, whose latest work of a netball court’ Contact! is best described as a full-length netball musical comedy.

While it may sound a strange colli- and Victorian Opera, has taken a cast of sion of the worlds of culture and sport, young operatic talent from those compathis one really works - Grant had the nies and the Victorian College of the Arts advantage of having the first act of Con- to bring this netball (soap) opera to a stage tact! played to an audience during the near you.

Composer Grant is adamant that mixVictorian Arts Centre's New Music Seing culture and sport is a natural thing to ries last year.

Formidable coach Bev and the under- do.

"Opera and netball may at first seem 21 team from the Hyatt Park Rangers are gearing up for the big game against strange playmates, but it is a subject that seemed to me to be brimming with dratheir long-time rivals.

Bev's son Bevan is a footy star who matic potential.

“I have tried in the music to create a harbours a secret passion for netball, while Bev's timid daughter, Wendy, is sense of the movement and energy of a netball court, and explore Australians' happiest on the bench.

And newcomer Daisy is ready to (sometimes unhealthy) passion for their mess up Bev's tightly ordered game plan. sport."

You can catch all the drama, exciteBut who wins the day and who is left holding the plate of sliced oranges won't ment, and fine operatic voices in the be revealed until the final siren … er Fairfax Theatre at the Victorian Arts curtain. In fact, you could say that it's not Centre from April 11-20.

Further information and bookings on over till the goal attack sings….

Acclaimed young director Cameron www.artscentremelbourne.com.au or Menzies, whose other directorial gigs in- 1300 182 183.

- Julie Houghton clude work with both Opera Australia

Valuable lessons can sometimes be lost due to emotional responses created from short-term volatility and disruption. It can be so frustrating!

One of the most straightforward strategies that can be utilised to assist client portfolios in times of high frustration and volatility is that of dollar cost averaging.

Dollar cost averaging is an investment strategy that can be used with any investment. Dollar cost averaging involves investing equal monetary amounts regularly over specific time periods (such as $100 monthly) in a particular investment or portfolio.

By doing so, more shares are purchased when prices are low and fewer shares are purchased when prices are high. The point of this is to lower the total average cost per share of the investment, giving the investor a lower overall cost for the shares purchased over time.

The really interesting thing with dollar cost averaging actually works better in volatile markets rather than those that gradually increase.

As investors we all prefer markets like those from 2003 to early 2008 when despite the odd “market correction” along the way the overall direction was pointing up.

Since the start of 2008 and the global financial crisis volatility has been ever present. 1% to 2% swings on a regular basis have coursed a significant amount of stress but interestingly enough some of us have become a little conditioned to it!

That’s a discussion for another time.

An example of a dollar cost averaging strategy is where $100 is invested over five time periods.

The market price of the investment begins at $10, falls to $7.50, falls further to $5.50 before bouncing back to $11 before settling back at $10. In other words the market over the five investment periods has ended where it started.

The bad news about dollar cost averaging is that some times you will be buying into a market at high prices although you will also be buying in at low points, which is where you essentially make your money.

In this case, at the end of the period by dollar cost averaging the investment portfolio was worth $606. Keep in mind, $500 was invested and the market ended where it started.

If you had invested the same amount in a market that rose steadily from $10 in $1 increments to $14, you would have had a portfolio worth close to $591.

The average cost of the dollar cost averaged portfolio was $8.25 compared to $11.83 for the gradually increasing market.

What we quickly learn here is less about the end portfolio value and more about overcoming our natural behaviour. We generally feel good about investing when markets are trending up steadily.

Markets that are volatile unsettle us and create doubt about the wisdom of investing and have us second-guess our decisions.

A disciplined investment approach like dollar cost averaging helps overcome that natural behavioural that wants us to try and time the market, which is fraught with danger.

As always, if you would like to review your personal financial situation we would be happy to meet with you initially, at our expense.

Jon & Andrew Rancie are Authorised Representatives of Australian Financial Services (AFSL: No. 297239) Note: In this article we have not considered your personal situation nor your goals or objectives. You should not base your future investment decisions on the content of this article. Before you invest your hard earned money you should consult a Financial Adviser and have your situation reviewed, clarified and agree to a strategy for investing for the future.

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Page 6 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Funny stuff ■ Dave Hughes and Kate Langbroek took their Nova 100 breakfast program to the Lower Town Hall on Friday to feature comedians including Wil Anderson, Peter Helliar, Tom Gleeson, Adam Rozenbachs, Dave Thornton, Nick Cody, Joel Creasey, Celia Pacquola and Ben Lomas .

People Melbourne

Send news to editor@melbourneobserver.com.au

Flicks ■ Writer, director, cinematographer and artist Warwick Thornton will reveal his top five films of all time in the Australian Centre for the Moving Image’s popular Desert Island Flicks program on Thursday (April 12) at 7pm.

Fax: 1-800 231 312

Appointed ■ Barbara Stone has been appointed to head Musica Viva’s education program.

The organisation has been running for more than 30 years, and will deliver education through the National Broadband Network.

Ms Stone was Principal at Melbourne’s MLC for more than 20 years.

Butterfly Club stages top new show ■ Helen Money and Mike Brady were in the opening night audience for the new Comedy Festival show, Pyramids and Pimms, being staged at the Butterfly Club, South Melbourne.

The show is the work of Caroline Ferguson andYvonne Malik. Critic IkemYarbyd’s review is on Page 59 of this week’s Melbourne Observer.

‘Hush’ CD launched

■ Kenn Clarke (Katies Records, MountWaverley) joined with Angela and Keith McGowan at Como, SouthYarra, to congratulate Jo Duff, Hush Foundation board member, on the launch of the latest CD, led by Dr Catherine Crock. More photos on Page 11.

Photos:Thanks to Suzie Howie

■ Antonio Zeccola, Managing Director of Palace Cinemas; Dr Catherine Crock of the Hush Foundation, and music man Bill Duff.

● HMAS Vendetta, from left: Austen ‘Ozz’ Kosasih (bass), William James Smith (vocals/piano/organ), Rory O’Donnell (drums), Caerwen Martin (cello) and Zac Johnston (violin/vocals) will perform on April 25 at The Evelyn, Fitzroy.

■ HMAS Vendetta will debut their operatic rock epic titled The Anzac Spirit – Australians In The Great War in a matinee performance at The Evelyn, 351 Brunswick St, Fitzroy, on April 25 (ANZAC Day).

The show will be in two parts; Gallipoli and The Western Front.

HMAS Vendetta has a unique sound with electric violin, cello, piano, organ and semioperatic vocals added to the driving rock rhythm section of bass guitar and drums.

Complete with visuals, costumes and theatrics, this unique rock show will take the audience back to relive a crucial time in history and meet the heroes of their age, the ANZACS. ■ Pictured at Jeanne Pratt’s mansion, ‘Raheen’, at Doors open at 2pm.

Kew, for the 2012 season launch of The Production Entry $12. Part of proCompany were media identities Ash Long and ceeds will be donated to Suzanne Carbone. More photos on Page 15..

Legacy.

VIP media guests

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Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 - Page 7

Page 8 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012

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Melbourne

Passing of Jimmy Little, at age 75

● Jimmy Little ■ Recording artist Jimmy Little died on Monday morning (Apr. 2), after a long battle with kidney disease, a heart condition and diabetes.

James Oswald Little was born on in 1937 on the Cummergunaja Mission to parents Frances and Jimmy Little Snr. He was the eldest of seven children, Fred, Ernest, Madeline, Betty, Monica and Colin.

Living at Dubbo, he still retained his links with the Yorta Yorta people at Echuca. He lost his wife, Marjorie Rose Little in July last year.

Jimmy was well known for his hit, Royal Telephone. He was equally known as a quietly-spoken good bloke.

Jimmy is survived by his daughter Frances Claire Peters-Little and his grandson James Henry.

Observer

Observer Extra

EMILY MAKES HER OWN NAME

■ Daughter of a renowned Australian actor and dancer, performing arts course through Emily Mercurio's veins.

However, she insists that it is fiery passion and raging ambition, not a name, which gives her a leg up on the competition.

In an industry based greatly on whom you know, Emily candidly admits that any advantage is worth utilising.

"If a name helps me to be remembered as I'm starting out, I shouldn't dismiss it".

"It's like the story of the guy who would walk into every audition with a watermelon," she says. " He'd put the watermelon on the piano and sing ... and the point was that everyone would remember him as the guy with the watermelon."

At only 20, Emily is committed to carving a musical theatre path for herself. She doesn't feel pressured by the weight of her family name.

In reality, it has prepared her to tackle such an unstable field.

"I feel like having grown up watching my dad pave his way through the industry, I don't have any illusions...He has given me the extra knowledge behind it."

Having kin who know firsthand the inherent woes of performing has also provided Emily with greater solace than a surname ever could.

● Emily Mercurio

Places To Go At Easter

A unique collection of art glass, bronze sculptures, and hand made jewellery by leading Australian Artists.

Open 7 days.

Left: "Hand made necklace by Pip Keane" Right: "Hand Blown Glass by Phil D=Stokes" Below:Leap to Freedom by Francois Jaggi

1082 High St, Armadale ph: 03 9500 9930 veronica@veronicageorge.com.au www.veronicageorge.com.au

"Performing is a part of my family, my grandfather acted, my mum was a ballerina...they understand and support me completely. I feel really lucky to have that behind me."

Through her own endeavours, Emily avidly is reinvigorating the Mercurio legacy.

On top of embarking upon professional theatre, she is indulging her gift of story-telling.

One More Year, a musical she co-wrote based upon the gruelling final year of high school, is another of her theatrical pursuits.

"I would love for One More Year to feature in small Australian theatres", she says, "or even picked up by a school touring company."

Currently, Emily and her team are working towards the show's debut at Cromwell Road Theatre, South Yarra.

At the moment, Emily's ultimate goal is to continue this marriage of writing and performing.

"In five years it would be incredible to have a book published, for One More Year to have developed further. .. and I'd love to be employed in a show!" she declares with a laugh.

For now Mercurio may be her watermelon, but it will be Emily who you remember. onemoreyear.weebly.com - Melissa Koutoukidis

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 - Page 9

Confidential Melbourne

Talk is cheap, gossip is priceless

SEX OFFENDER BACK IN COURT: 19½-YEARS PRISON SENTENCE

Bitch Melbourne’s Secrets

‘Slut’ case in Court ■ Radio man Steve Price faced Court last week, over a segment in which Rugby League woman Charmyne Palavi was called a “slut”.

The segment, with Melbourne showbiz reporter Peter Ford, was broadcast on 3AW’s sister station, 2UE, in 2009.

A jury last week found that Price and Ford had no case to answer. Price: “"I used the word slut and by any definition, if you look in the dictionary, it's what I thought she was and the jury agreed.

John’s brush with death

■ A 53-year-old private music teacher, who raped and sexually assaulted pupils, has had his minimum jail term fixed at 19½-years.

The Victorian name, who cannot be named for legal reasons, took his case to Supreme Court Judges Maxwell, Buchnanan and Weinberg, sitting as the Court of Appeal.

The man had 3½-years shaved from his sentence in the appeal.

The Judges heard thatr the man, known as ‘DHC’ in Court files, had been convicted of multiple sexual offences against children, including rape and producing child pornography.

Some sexual assaults were filmed while victims were unconscious, the Court was told.

FILE PHOTO

● A 53-year-old private music teacher will be in jail for a minimum 19½ years

GROUPS LOSE LEGAL STATUS

● John Parker: rear-ended in Fitzroy ■ Melbourne businessman John Parker is nursing his wounds after a serious motorcycle accident.

Now dubbed ‘Evil Knievel’ by his pals, the Format Furniture boss was thrown from his Vespa in Fitzroy.

Parker received attention in Accident and Emergency, and friends including Natasha Stipanov and Christian Wagstaff have provided round-the-clock attention.

● Parker in traction

ON-THE-SPOT PHOTO: SUE DEENIM

■ A number of Victorian organisations have lost their incorporation status. Deputy Registrar David Betts notified on Thursday of the deletions for: Grampians Country & Variety Club Inc.; Melbourne Thunder Baseball Club Inc.; St Paul’s School Tennis and Sports Club Inc.; The Eternal Church Australia Inc.; ‘Las Estrellitas’ Spanish Group/Playgroup Inc.; Mt. Pleasant Kindergarten Inc.; Huntly Hotel Social Club Inc.; Al-Hadara Club Inc.; Tamil Co-Ordinating Committee –Australia Inc.; Old Fintonians’Association Inc.; Human Capital Institute (Asia Pacific) Inc.; Sale City Social Club Inc.; Golden Beach Land Rights Group Inc.; Mansfield Anti PokerAlliance Inc.; Friends of Lake Purrumbete Inc.; Prom Coast Guardians Inc.; Macedonian Women’s Group Monika Taylors Lakes Inc.; Magpie Supporters Sporting Club of Bendigo Inc.; Safety Beach Country Club Residents’ Association Inc.; North East Valleys Food and Wine Inc.; W.I.S.H.E.S. Women Initiating Self Help External Support – A Post Natal Depression Group Inc.; RVF Support Network Inc.; Serbian Orthodox Cultural and Media Association Inc.; Counselling and Careers Association (Melbourne) Inc.; Lazy Café Theatre Association Inc.; Zen Buddhist Meditation Group Ballarat Inc.; Koonwarra Sustainable Communities Centre Inc.; Golden Rivers Tourism Inc.; Victorian Native Fish Farmers Inc.; The Smooth Fox Terrier Club of Victoria Inc.; Eastern United Football Club Inc.; Justin Friendship Club Inc.; Sustainable Behaviours Inc.; KirkFest Committee Inc.; Woodford Tennis Club Inc.; La Dolce Italia Festival Inc.; Taxi Owners Social Club Inc.; G.V. Bombers Drivers Association Inc.; Bus Association Victoria – North Central Branch Inc.; Bus Association Victoria – East Gippsland Branch Inc.; Bus Association Victoria – North West Branch Inc.; Bus Association Victoria – South West Grampians Branch Inc.; Bus Association Victoria – South Central Branch Inc.; Bus Association Victoria – Goulburn North East Branch Inc.; Bus Association Victoria – Gippsland Branch Inc.; Marque Sports Car Racing Victoria Inc.

The reduction in jail term came about after some of the convictions were found legally defective, even though the man had pleaded guilty.

Some convictions were quashed, judgement and verdict of acquittal was entered.

The Judges re-sentenced the man, taking into account there had been some legal overlap with the charges.

The offences took place between 1996 and 2008, at the man’s residence, which consisted of a makeshift bedroom and large shed on his father’s property.

A Police raid on the property found videos, DVDs, computer hard drives, photographs, covert video camera, and sexual implements including vibrators.

Rumour Mill

Whispers

Fred’s probed ■ Fred’s Transport has denied it tampers with speed limiters on its trucks. One Fred’s vehicle was allegedly caught at 130kmh at Holbrook last week, but the company says the incident was because of human error.

For sale ■ The freehold of Weller’s Restaurant at Kangaroo Ground is for sale, for just the third time in a century. Owners Shawn and Stephanie Wolfe are asking up to $2.2 million.

Jewellery Hear It Here First

Pay TV charges soon?

■ Companies which have been illegally distributing pay TV channels may soon be charged, the Rumour Mill believes.

Police raids are planned in Melbourne and other cities in the next few weeks, sources say.

Viewers are promised access to more than 1000 channels at discounted prices, under the schemes.

&

Short Sharp ■ Disgrunted Springvale cab driver Sakatar Singh, 36, has admitted stealing a taxi from his bosses, driving it, and keeping the fares. He has received a community corrections order.

■ Buying solar panels for your home? Consider the plight of Moorabbin couple Robert and Ann Hickie who paid out $22,000 for panels, which are now overshadowed by neighbouring buildings.

■ Pine cones weighing up to 11-kg have been removed from trees at Werribee Park.

E-Mail: Confidential@MelbourneObserver.com.au

■ Police advise that thieves have taken antique jewellery from a Sheppar ton house. Goods taken the raid are valued at $20,000.

RSL fight ■ Doncaster RSL sub-branch is fighting for its life, after standing firm on its ‘no pokies’ policy.

Ex-Espy ■ St Kilda pub patrons are mourning the dismissal of artist Fred Negro from drawing the weekly Inpress ads for The Espy. It has an integral part of St Kilda culture for many years.

Page 10 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Walking the streets

● Wanda Sykes ■ I have spent the past week walking around the streets of Melbourne.

No, I haven’t started a new profession and I am not busking I have been following the Melbourne International Comedy Festival 2012 and it has been fantastic.

Faces everywhere, smiling in anticipation of what is going to be and certainly proving to be a wonderful festival.

I must say the Melbourne Town Hall becomes a thriving metropolis of faces, brochures, people standing outside hugging and like a huge reunion.

I caught up comedians Dave Thornton, Damian Callinan, Wanda Sykes, Mike Wilmot (Canadian very funny comedian), the hilarious John Robertson (more about him later),the beautiful Fiona O’Loughlin and the very funny Joel Creasey.

They are all chasing four stars. The big thing in the Comedy Festival for the performers are the reviews and if they get four stars, there are celebrations, whoopees and pats on the back all around!

No joking ...

■ Before I plunge even further into the jocularity and the hilarity of the Comedy Festival, I want to tell you about another funny man coming to Australia – Ben Vereen.

R & B superstar Usher is his godson. Ben is coming to Melbourne to perform one night only at The Athenaeum Theatre on Saturday, June 23, at 8pm.

Tickets are on sale now via www.ticketek.com.au or ring 132 849.

A true legend of Broadway, Ben Vereen will be steppin’ out with a unique blend of artistry combining a journey of his amazing career on Broadway, and paying tribute to Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jnr. Each performance is filled with song and dance, stories of his life, and a great deal of humour.

A Tony Award winner for his role in Pippin, Vereen has appeared on Broadway in Wicked, Fosse, Chicago, Jesus Christ Superstar, Hair, Grind, Jelly’s Last Jam, A Christmas Carol and I’m not Rappaport.

Vereen’s film credits include Bob Fosse’s classics Sweet Charity and All That Jazz and Barbara Streisand’s Funny Lady.

Vereen starred as ‘Chicken George’ in the seven-Emmy Award winning mini-series Roots.

His performance in that series remains with me today. Ben Vereen as also appeared in television series including How I Met Your Mother , Grey’s Anatomy, Law and Order, The Nanny and Star Trek.

To

Di

I love my job!

For BIRTHDAY BONUS!

■ It was my birthday during the week.

I do love a birthday and celebrated with a breakfast first thing in the morning with PR gal friend Erin Jamieson, then had coffee with mate David Hoffman at En Vogue in South Yarra who treated me a slice of their fabulous tiramisu – it was scrumptious!

Birthdays are so special and even though I was busy running around getting comedians in the paper and working, I managed to catch up with dear friends.

Rob ‘Belvedere’ Mascara took me for afternoon tea, along with his beautiful dog Bella.

The night saw me at the Melbourne Town Hall watching Joel Creasey whip an audience to a frenzy with his hilarious “must see” show in the Lunch Room.

He is just brilliant and reviewers are raving.

His story about the Sydney Swans at the airport is worth going just to hear that story.

His show is called Naked and I am going back for seconds!

Joel Creasey received four stars from the Herald Sun. The Melbourne Town Hall: Mon 9.30pm, Tues-Sat 9.45pm,and Sundays 8.45pm.

Ticketmaster, 1300 660 013 and at the door.

Cherished

● Ben Vereen

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

■ With so much sadness happening in the world I cherish and embrace happy occasions, particularly the Melbourne International Comedy Festival.

with leading Melbourne publicist DI ROLLE

India, Sri Lanka, the USA (New Orleans), Haiti and other countries has gained her widespread international recognition.

She is regularly invited to address the United Nations, has been honoured with a number of international awards including the prestigious Ghandi-King Award for Non-Violence in 2002, the James Park Morton Interfaith Award in 2006 and the Cinema Verite Award in 2007 for humanitarian and human rights work.

She is coming to Melbourne and will appear at the Sandown Racecourse, Springvale on April 12, 10am and 7.30pm; April 13, 10am and 7.30pm; and April 16 at 7pm.

Free entry!

Amma comes to our shores pretty highly recommended, Deepak Chopra said of her, “Amma is the embodiment of pure love. Her presence heals.”

Mmm that’s good enough for me!

More information on retreats and other events visit www. ammaustralia.org.au

● Joel Creasy in Naked It’s a wonderful plat- people around the form for people to globe over the past 30 make other people years and she is still laugh and forget the hugging. sadness of what is hapIn India where pening.

Amma is widely reParticularly when I vered, she often have lost my Dad and blesses more than I have days of a lot of 40,000 people without sadness despite mov- taking a break for pering forward it washes sonal needs, rest or over me at the oddest food for up to 24 hours of times. at a time.

A woman who Amma’s extensive knows how to bring a humanitarian work in smile to people’s faces is Amma.

Amma is best described by what she does.

Amma is a 58-yearold Indian woman who has spent her life working tirelessly to alleviate human suffering both in India and around the world.

Known throughout the world as ‘the Hugging Saint’, Amma imparts her spiritual blessing by individually meeting and embracing all who come to see her.

It is estimated that she has hugged in excess of 31 million ● Amma

Di Rolle is heard most Mondays with Andrew McLaren on 3AW, just after the 1am quiz.

● Lawrence Money and Jenny Hughes at the Butterfly Club for the Melbourne Comedy Festival

● Daisy Brady and Chris Ryan at Pyramids and Pimms

● Chris Walker and Carly O'Neill enjoyed A Modern Deception: More Diabolical Magic at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival.

Photo: Malcolm Threadgold

● Stacey Begovich and Kate Hindley were in the audience at the Village Roadshow Theatrette.

Photo: Malcolm Threadgold

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 - Page 11

Melbourne People

‘Hush Collection’ Launch Como, South Yarra Our thanks to Suzie Howie

● Rae Anstee with Bill Duff, Hush Board member

● Philippa Finney with Derryn Hinch

● Holly Richards with Anne Robinson

● Janine Fredman, Hush Board Member, with Alan Finney

● Dr. Catherine Crock, Founder of the Hush Foundation

● Lucy Belfrage (Board member of Hush) with her children Mabel and Angela

● Karen and Antonio Zeccola

● David Mitchell with Clint Drieberg

● Bill Armstrong and Tony Gould

● Paul O’Gorman with Angela McGowan

● Tony Gould performing for the guests

● Ewa Richardson and daughter Holly

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Page 12 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 Melbourne

Observer

The Best Columnists

SEE YOU AT THE THEATRE

They Say ★

That one Melbourne businessman’s planned secret Easter rendezvous with his mistress in Fiji was blown wide open when the airline called home to notify of flight cancellations because of the floods.

That TV man Kerry O’Brien investigated his surname ancestry last night in Who Do You Think You Are? (SBS, 7.30pm). Apparently not all with O’Brien heritage are proud of the link.

That one newly-arrived media type has been openly mocking her bosses. She does not seem to realise who is listening ... and with whom they speak. The silly girl should start researching the jobs guides.

That self-confessed burglar Neil McKittrick complimented the home security camera system that detected his break-in at Noble Park, whenhe appeared before Dandenong Court.

★

The week in the life

Our Doors are Open!

With the March Masonic Month of Celebration coming to an end, the new Grand Master of Freemasons Victoria shares his first week on the job

★ ★

● Claire Beecher, John Lidgerwood and Catherine Freeman ■ Melbourne’s show business was out in force this week for the launch of the 2012 season of The Production Company.

Jeanne Pratt welcomed hundreds of guests to her mansion, ‘Raheen’, Kew, and announed the line-up of The Producers (July 10-15); Chess (Aug. 21-26); and Promises, Promises (Oct. 3-7).

The Producers stars Wayne Scott Kermond, Mitchell Butel, Rohan Browne, Trevor Ashley and Christie Whelan.

Andrew Hallsworth and Dean Bryant will direct and choreograph.

Kellie Dickerson will conduct.

Silvie Paladino, Mareditor@ melbourneobserver.com.au tin Crewes, Simon Gleewith Ash Long, Editor son and Bobby Fox star in Chess, The Musical.

“For the cause that lacks assistance, Gale Edwards is director; ‘Gainst the wrongs that need resistance Tony Bartuccio is choreFor the future in the distance, ographer; David Piper And the good that we can do” conducts.

Long Shots

● Bob Jones hands over the keys Bob Jones, the new Grand Master of Freemasons Victoria was installed on Friday March 23 in a grand ceremony webcast to thousands across Australia and the world. It was a proud moment for Bob's wife and two sons and of course, Freemasons Victoria.

A Thanksgiving service and farewell luncheon was held on the Sunday - a beautiful conclusion to a memorable Masonic month of celebration. Come Monday morning, however, there was no time for a much-deserved sleep in; instead it was no rest for Bob who was the star attraction at the Grand Masters Conference where Grand Masters from all over Australia and overseas met and discussed issues which are of interest to their particular jurisdiction and Freemasonry in general.

Bob's first official public function as Grand Master was one he was especially looking forward to and, as a car fanatic, a very fitting first engagement: the hand over of a brand new Mercedes Sprinter van to SecondBite, a Kensington-based charity which collects rescued produce from food donors including Coles, Heniz, Bakers Delight and ALDI and distributes boxes filled with fruit and veggies to over 221 community food programs across Melbourne and end up on the table of thousands of needy Victorians who would have otherwise not been able to afford a decent meal.

"The new van generously donated by the Freemasons of the Western District will enable SecondBite to deliver not only to agencies currently waiting for deliveries of fresh food for their food programs, but will enable SecondBite to rescue and redistribute an additional 7,000kgs every week - enough fresh food to provide 14,000 meals every week to people in need or over 700,000 meals every year," says Katy Barfield, Executive Director of SecondBite.

The Grand Master stated that SecondBite was chosen to receive the funding for the new van as the organisation's principles are consistent with the charitable nature of Freemasons work. "A member commented on the great wastage of food at one of our own functions and knew of organisations committed to distributing food to the needy and homeless," says Bob. "We got in touch with SecondBite and it just went from there.

We are proud to be associated with such a worthwhile cause."

Freemasons in the Western District raised funds for the van through fundraising activities and then approached the Freemasons Victoria Board of Benevolence who matched the donation, plus a bit more. The Board figures predominantly and was established to provide assistance to ensure that no member of a Lodge or their family and the wider community suffers hardship in troubled times.

To find out more about Freemasonry, how to become a member, or attend upcoming public events, please visit www.freemasonsvic.net.au or 'Like' our Facebook page, www.facebook.com/ freemasonsvic for the most up to date information.

Promises, promises ■ Jeanne Pratt announced that the third show, in this 14th season, will be Promises, Promises.

It will star Marina Prior, Matt Hetherington, and be directed by Nadia Tass, with Guy Simpson as Musical Director.

Orchestra Victoria is part of every performance, to be staged at the State Theatre, Arts Centre.

A 6.30pm Tuesday evening session is being introduced for the first two shows, as part of an ‘Under 30’ series. the two shows can be seen for as little as $60.

Short Shots ■ Favourite Observer columnist Yvonne Law-rence is on leave. Her columnist will return after the Easter break.

■ We would love you to support our friends at the Royal Children’s Hospital Good Friday Appeal. You can give the appeal a kick start by phoning 9292 1166 before the Easter break.

■ Actor Ken James is in remission after his cancer scare. He will now appear in a mid-year show, Ladies Night, and is planning to direct another show, Calendar Girls, in 2013.

Melbourne

People Gordon Arthur Bett ■ “The farm gate is finally closed,” remarked a published obituary for rural identity Gordon Arthur Bett, who passed away on March 25. The Yea farmer, 88, was husband of Thelma and Isabel (dec.), father of John and Jean, Dot and Barry, Pa of Lloyd, Rohan, Ross and Rana, Joel and Rachael and Glen.

He was great grandfather of Celeste, April and Quinn.

A funeral service was held on Friday (March 30) at St Luke’s Anglican Church, Yea, with private cremation.

Observer Treasury Thought For The Week

■ “Good behaviour gets a lot of credit that really belongs to lack of opportunity.”

Observer Curmudgeon

■ “Thye pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.”

- Oscar Wilde

Text For The Week

■ “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

- John 3:16

Melbourne Observations with Matt Bissett-Johnson

14 great years ■ These are three ‘winners’. Jeanne Pratt has assembled a mighty team of Melbourne ‘creatives’ to deliver the shows. They are listed online.

They are led by Artistic Director Ken Mackenzie Forbes, and Executive Director Rachel Director.

Free reader ads are available in the Melbourne Trader section of the ‘Melbourne Observer’

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 - Page 13

Touring - Star Attraction

To view,Google The Cape Beach House,Cape Paterson or Stayz website

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Page 14 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Going Away for Easter?

Need someone to mind the pets, check the house, water the garden?

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As well as our holiday and pet services we have a number of services available for those 'one off' occasions. Want the house cleaned after you move, or before you move in, got a rental inspection coming up?

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www.makingtime.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 - Page 15

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne People

The Production Company 2012 Season Launch ‘Raheen’, Kew

● John Hay Mackenzie with Nadia Tass

● Michael Troy and Erin Lidgerwood

● Deputy Lord Mayor Cr Susan Rileyand Jim Riley

● Tony Bartuccio with Frank Van Straten

● Jenny Packer with Andrea Lace

● Martin Crewes with Ken Mackenzie Forbes

● Keith Beecher with Leanne Russell

● Rosemarie Stuhlener, Ken James with Suzanne Carbone

● Jaquelyn Muller with Xen

● David Jackson with Chris Ryan

● Wayne Scott Kermond with Mark Gogoll

● Gary Bartholomew with Alan Pearsall

Page 16 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012

■ I recently watched the film Samson and Delilah starring Victor Mature and the beautiful Hedy Lamarr.

I thought Hedy Lamarr was wonderful in the film and her ‘screen presence’ still captivates viewers all over the world 12 years after her passing.

Hedwig Eva Maria Kiesler was born as an only child in Vienna, Austria in 1913.

Her parents were Jewish, her father died before the Holocaust and Hedy later rescued her mother.

As a child she studied piano and in her teenage years played roles in German films under the name of Hedy Kiesler.

In 1933 she became famous when Hedy starred in a Czechoslovakian film titled Ecstasy.

The film became controversial after she appeared in her birthday suit.

At the age of 19 she married for the first time.

Her husband objected to Ecstasy and tried to buy all the copies. He took Hedy to meetings where she learned a lot about military technology.

In 1937 Hedy fled from her domineering husband and went to London.

She met MGM studio chief Louis B Mayer who offered her a film contact and changed her name to Hedy Lamarr.

In 1938 she made her Hollywood debut in English speaking films with her role in Algiers,

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Whatever Happened To ...

Hedy Lamaar

By Kevin Trask of 3AW and 96.5 Inner FM co-starring with Charles Boyer. She was soon considered by many to be one of the most beautiful women in films.

Hedy was starring opposite the biggest stars in Hollywood and appeared in films such as Boom Town, Comrade X, Ziegfeld Girl and White Cargo.

But there was another side to Hedy Lamarr that the movie going public knew nothing about.

Hedy hated the Nazis and was a very intelligent woman who spoke six languages. Using some of the knowledge she had gained from her first husband she secretly worked on a radio system to control submarine torpedos by changing frequencies to prevent enemy interception.

Hedy and her friend George Antheil took out

● Hedy Lamaar a patent for the revolutionary invention in 1942 and offered it to the US Military. Although it was not used in WWII it was implemented successfully in 1962 during the Cuban crisis to provide the Navy with secure communications between ships.

Today the principle is used to make mobile phones more secure.

Hedy continued making films and 1949 starred

in the Cecil B. De Mille classic, Sampson and Delilah. Hedy became naturalised citizen of the US in 1953.

Hedy was married six times during her lifetime and had three children. She retired from films in 1958 and settled in Florida.

Her autobiography Ecstasy and Me was published in 1966.

Hedy Lamarr had been one of the wealthiest women in Hollywood and had once owned the mansion used in the film, The Sound of Music.

But in 1966 she was charged with shop lifting and then again in 1991 - both charges were later dropped.

She sued Mel Brooks for mocking her name in the film Blazing Saddles and the case was settled out of court.

Hedy Lamarr passed away in 2000 at the age of 86. In accordance with her wishes her son scattered her ashes in the Vienna Woods.

The first Inventors Day in Germany in 2005 was held in her honour.

What an amazing life this beautiful Hollywood film star led - Hedy Lamarr.

Kevin Trask The Time Tunnel - with Bruce & PhilSundays at 8.30pm on 3AW That's Entertainment - 96.5FM Sundays at 12 Noon 96.5FM is streaming on the internet.

To listen, go to www.innerfm.org.au and follow the prompts.

SAD FAREWELL TO SCOTTY’S PUB

■ When I first seriously visited Alice Springs in the early 1990s, wholesaling my beautiful opals, I strode around the Todd Mall inspecting the existing opal shops.

I dined at a pancake parlour, and noticed that there was a pub next door: Scotty's.

Little did I know that, a year later, the pancake parlour would be my own chosen retail venue, and the pub would become my second home!

And I've just heard the sad news it closed last week.

First Bo's closing, now Scotty's.

Granted it changed to the high fallutin' ‘Town and Country Tavern’ a couple of years ago, but to me it was always Scotty's.

Scotty was a good mate, and I've watched him dancing on his tables, and being barred from his own hostelry!

I've drunk with bikies and bushies and ringers from all over the Territory, and backpackers from all over the world.

I've spent hours there with Ozzie, watching for customers to walk up my path. I'd scurry over to serve them, then scurry back to the pub.

I'd close the shop when I figured that the waft of whisky may overpower my customers!

I've slurringly warbled Beatles songs in a duet with Paul Mercurio, and I've ogled the Toe Sucking Cowgirls!

■ One day Scotty wandered over and told me: "Dad's got Slim and Joy with him at the pub - would you like to come and meet them?"

I first met Slim in a juke box in Coober Pedy in the 60s - I was an ohso-cool Jazzer from Melbourne, and Slim was oh-so-daggy!

Then some local Aboriginal kids whom I had befriended began an incessant daily barrage of nasal intonations and dang-dang-dang!

After a month of that I relented, and The Best of Slim Dusty was added to the Yarra Yarra Jazz Band upon my return, and he's been my constant travelling companion ever since.

Would I like to meet Slim and Joy? "Bloody Oath!" I retorted.

So I scuttled across, and sure enough there was my mate of many a mile sitting there.

On Slim's first visit to Alice years before, Reg, Scotty's dad, had helped him set up and organise the concert,

The Outback Legend

Apparently each bank in Alice had a defined position: "Fecal Matter Cleaner-upperer off the Bank Floor".

Not full-time, but nevertheless not uncommon either.

Apparently some customers, usually ladies in their flowing dresses, would avail themselves of the convenience of the tiles while waiting for a teller.

I never witnessed such an event in Alice, at least not in a bank, but it happened next to me one night in the front bar of the old Coober Pedy pub.

Put me off my drink!

so they'd been mates ever since.

A self-effacing, hearty man, he was the good guy I'd always visualized.

I've spent many a moment in pubs, both before and since, but that couple of hours that day in Scotty's are up there with the best!

■ Always an idiot or two! One gentleman, who had never even had a drivers licence, was pulled up a few nights ago. He was so drunk he could barely stand, and was off to the bottle shop for more.

He was .224.

Then a group of young teenagers broke into a house through an unlocked window one recent morning.

They discovered the keys of a Camry in the house, so all piled into that. They drove around to pick up some more mates, until there were 11 in the car.

Obviously they were spied by the police, who instantly gave chase. It was not a high speed affair, only about 100 kmh, but the car soon crashed into a road sign.

Police suspect that the 15 year-old driver lost control because he was wearing socks on his hands to avoid leaving fingerprints on the steering wheel.

The mind boggles!

■ I was at a tourist function just recently and was amiably chatting to a fellow attendee, a bank manager.

I had a good mate, Nev, who was the ANZ manager in Alice Springs.

He was about to leave town for another posting and, one Friday night he joined Ozzie and I in Scotty's.

He had come from his staff farewell party, and showed us his parting gift. Along with a card - "To remind you of your time in Alice Springs!"

He had carefully opened the elaborately wrapped article.

A pretend turd! Straight from the novelty shop!

I could understand this sentiment, because such items are not unknown on footpaths and public lawns around the town.

But Nev honed in more specifically.

■ I can understand some local cockies wishing to reduce kangaroo numbers a little if they are nibbling at crops and decimating stock feed.

Professional shooters have a quota, and they dispose of their quarry efficiently and painlessly.

They are crack shots, and don't wish to waste expensive ammunition.

One minute a roo is unconcernedly sniffing the air, and the next instant he's on the ground, none the wiser, with no pain and no cruelty.

Which can't be said about some sadistic individual in Alice Springs last week. This malevolent idiot had set some wire snares to entrap some poor hapless beasts.

In Alice, habitation ends, and the bush begins instantly. In the hills just west of town some of these traps had

with Nick Le Souef Lightning Ridge Opals 175 Flinders Lane, Melbourne Phone 9654 4444 www.opals.net.au

● Town and Country Hotel, Alice Springs been set up. them.

A Wildcare worker, Cynthia Apparently this occurrence goes in Lynch, had received a call from a cycles, because last year she found concerned citizen and attended the numerous traps in the same area. scene. She discovered a huge roo enJust pointless cruelty for no practitrapped by the wire. cal purpose at all.

She released it, happily uninjured, Some individuals feed themselves, with some bolt cutters, and it hopped or their dogs, on these majestic maroff on its merry way.

With struggles subsequent to cap- supials, but there are more than ture, injuries usually occur in these cir- enough roadkills around the place for this enterprise. cumstances.

- Nick Le Souef She searched the hills and found a few more snares and dismantled ‘The Outback Legend’

From The Outer

Melbourne

Observer

kojak@ mmnet.com.au

With John Pasquarelli

■ As Australian politics crash on, the glaring weaknesses of our political systems become increasingly obvious. On all side of politics, most MPs have bounced from school to uni to working in a parliamentary office then sussing out a seat for themselves.

Of course on the way, some work for a trade union, in the law or accountancy for a while but the scary thing is that most of these people have never employed another person out of their own pocket, let alone getting off the bitumen to see how other people work and live.

This lack of genuine contact with the mainstream contributes to the contempt that most MPs are held in.

Until the party machines change, the culture of politics will remain the same.

For a start, federal and state directorates must set down guidelines for those wishing to be candidates, requiring genuine evidence of real life experience - not some bodgy cooked up CV. Dangerous territory as it is, age must also come into the equation as experience is the greatest teacher of all.

Opal mining at Coober Pedy in 1959 catapulted me into the real world after I dropped out of Melbourne Uni and the headwaters of the Sepik removed the final scales from my eyes.

- John Pasquarelli: kojak@mmnet.com.au

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 - Page 17

Bennetts Boots - Marketing Feature

Page 18 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012

www.MelbourneObserver.com.au

Observer Readers’ Club 100 Years Ago. Mornington Standard.

Saturday, April 6, 1912 OUR LETTER BOX We do not necessarily identify ourselves with the opinions expressed by corres pondents SUNDAYEVENINGCONCERTS, TO TIlE EDITOR Sir,-Would you kindly allow me space in your valuable columns re Sunday evening conceits. I read in. your last week's issue a protest from the vestry of St. Paul's Church, Frankston, and was given to under stand by the hon. secretary of the above that it was directly against the entertainment to be given on Easter Sunday by the Frankston Orchestral Society.

Why protest? Where is the difference between an Entertainment that is kept as sacred as possible, and a Church Service that is made as entertaining as possible?

Notwith standing the fact that the society has been fair in holding the entertainment after the church services are over, the vestry has done all in its power to damp and stop the sacred service, namely, Mechanics Hall committee, and usinig' wvhat influence they had to keep persons from assisting.

What was the spirit that .urged them to work so hard against a sacred choral service given iby the Society, and trying to get up a concert at Carrum Downs on the same Sunday evening?

Why do they strain at a gnat and swallow a camel? Do the vestry think that only churches should have sacred music, or that sacred music would become tainted and lose its charms if it given in a hall ? Why did they not give their reason in the paper along with the protest? Do they think that broad-rminded residents are going to take things for granted and be led along blind-foldcd? Was it a selfish motive only, or is there also a bitter feeling behind all this? T a their little whiris.-Yours etc., A MEMBER OF FRANKSTONORCHESTRA

Melbourne Photo Flashback

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● Croydon Railway Station. A railway photo feature appears on Page 46

Life’s Lessons

Reader Recipes

■ “To love for the sake of being loved is human, but to love for the sake of loving is angelic” - Alphonse De Lamartine

● Silvery Easter Eggs Cooking Time: 20 minutes Makes: 24 Ingredients 24 eggs 1 tbs yellow powdered food colouring Silver stickers or silver leaf Olive oil spray, to coat Method Place the eggs in a large saucepan and cover with plenty of cold water. Add the food colouring and stir to combine. Bring to the boil over high heat while stirring constantly .ith a wooden or heatproof plastic spoon. Reduce heat to low and simmer, uncovered, for 2-3 minutes or until eggs are just cooked through. Remove from heat and set aside in the water for 30 minutes to cool.

Use a slotted spoon to transfer eggs to a plate lined with paper towel. Set aside to dry.

Decorate the eggs using silver stickers, or spray eggs lightly with olive oil spray and apply small pieces of silver leaf.

Nest the eggs in a large serving bowl and use as a table centrepiece.

Notes You can make these eggs up to one day ahead.

Powdered food colouring is available from specialty stores. If it's unavailable, you can substitute liquid food colouring, although the colour may be less intense.

Silver leaf is available from art supply stores and specialty stores. These eggs are edible if they're stored in the fridge.

Make the most of summer produce with our zucchini recipes, strawberry recipes and mango recipes.

■ Wednesday, April 4. Birthday honours to Susan Zerbe. Footy coach Rodney Eade is 54; he was born in Tasmania. Actor Hugo Weaving is 52.

■ Thursday, April 5. 3AW sportscaster Shane McInnes is 28. Michelle Van Raay, of Melbourne’s showbiz fraternity, celebrates today.

So does Angelika Anderson.

■ Friday, April 6. Good Friday. Happy birthday to Bruce Gow. TV producers Hal and Jim McElroy were born in Melbourne in 1946 (66).

■ Saturday, April 7. Actress Cornelia Frances (Zulver) is 71. ‘God Squad’ founder John Smith was born in Preston, 70 years ago. Actor Russell Crowe is 48.

■ Sunday, April 8. Easter Sunday. Actress Peta Toppano is 62.

■ Monday, April 9. Easter Monday. Birthday greetings to Jamie Redfern; many happy returns Jim! Former Governor-General Peter Hollingworth is 77.

■ Tuesday, April 10. Observer reader P Andrews of Hampton is 89. Dick Sinclair is 44.

■ Wednesday, April 11. Former VFL footballert Peter Bedford is 65.

■ Thursday, April 12. Journalist Bryan Patterson is 61. Carli Phillips celebrates today.

We remember the birthday of the late Don Brown (born 1933). Observer reader Sandra of Healesville is 63. Ann Gilding, ex Magic 1278, is 51. Former State Governor John Landy is 82. Comedienne Magda Szubankski is 51.

■ Friday, April 13. Kate McMurrich of 3AW is 34. The late Diana Gribble’s birthday (1942); Di passed away last year. Former 3AW manager David McDonald, now at 4BC Brisbane, celebrates today. Ventriloquist Ron Blaskett is 90. Singer Col Joye is 76.

■ Saturday, April 14. Birthday of newspaperman John Monks. Athlete Jane Flemming is 47; she was born in Melbourne.

■ Sunday, April 15. Actor Kym Gyngell is 60; he was born in Melbourne in 1952. Singer Lee Kernaghan was born in Corryong in 1964 (48).

■ Monday, April 16. Radio journalist Kate Murphy celebrates today.

Bumper Sticker

Cheerios

■ Seven words - the key to a long and happy marriage: “Yes, dear, I’m sorry, it’s my fault.”

■ A big hello to Valerie Coppin of Faversham Hotel, Canterbury.

■ Suzanne of Docklands sends affection to John of Fitzroy, who is on the Observer sick list.

Suzanne also sends two special Hot Cross Buns to Christian Wagstaff.

■ Greetings to all the kiddies at the Royal Children’s Hospital - we have will special thoughts for them on Good Friday.

■ Prothalamion - a wedding celebration song.

Trivia Challenge ■ Name the female star of While You Were Sleeping (1995)

Your Stars with Christina La Cross Aries (Mar 21 - Apr 20) Some sort of new experience is forecast which will give you the incentive to be more adventurous. Romance is under favorable influences but finances are not, so steer clear of needless spending.

Taurus (Apr 21 - May 21) Some sort of disruption is forecast on the social scene. Make sure you don't get involved in any social tittle-tattle or it could end up losing you the friendship of a face you hold dear.

Gemini (May 22 - June 21) Please try to guard against being extravagant and buy necessities only. You could be missing out on a golden opportunity for love and romance if you don't. New faces in business tell lies, beware.

Cancer (June 22 - July 23) Domestic activities appear to keep you especially busy. It may be necessary to take a course of action which you did not want to but which is now unavoidable. Luck links to midweek phone calls.

Leo (July 24 - Aug 23) Don't be ashamed of your past but think of all that it has enabled you to learn. It is only by focusing on what can be, rather than what can't, that you will find success.

Virgo (Aug 24 - Sept 23) Joint ventures or money matters look especially bright and you could soon discover a way of making some extra money. You will have to assert yourself a bit more to get closer to that new face.

Libra (Sept 24 - Oct 23) From today onwards you should be feeling full of confidence and optimism and may consider new solutions to old problems, especially concerning close family members.

Lies told today come back on you. Beware.

Scorpio (Oct 24 - Nov 22) Don't be afraid of treading on fresh ground or breaking with old ties as it should be to your advantage in the long run. New faces in the family appear to be permanent ones.

Sagittarius (Nov 23 - Dec 21) You've been thinking a lot about your life lately and what you want to do with it, but by that same token you've been allowing others to take control. Time to take control Sagittarius. Starting now.

Capricorn (Dec 22 - Jan 20) Life is what you make it Capricorn, so make yours count and stop running around doing what others tell you to. New contacts you make via friends at this time turn out to be the romantic kind!

Aquarius (Jan 21 - Feb 19) You keep looking back to the past through rose colored spectacles and you would be far better to view your life with fresh eyes, or you'll miss out on your best love matches yet Aquarius.

Pisces (Feb 20 - March 20) Someone contacts you around this time with an interesting proposition, which is well worth following up. Be bold and adventurous and you may be surprised at what you can do if you have a go.

FAX: 1-800 231 312 E-MAIL: editor@ melbourneobserver.com.au

Birthdays/Celebrations

Word Of The Week

Answer:Sandra Bullock

THe Way We Were

Just A Thought ■ “I think I would rather possess eyes that know no sight, ears that know no sound, hands that know no touch than a heart than knows to love.”

- Unknown

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Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 - Page 19

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Melbourne Homemaker

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Melbourne Seniors News

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Seniors News

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Home and Garden

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Antiques and Collectables

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Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 - Page 25

Antiques & Collectables THE COLLECTORS’ NEWSPAPER April 2012

For Collectors At Glen Eira

Phone: (03) 9439 7070

Published Monthly

NEW EXHIBITION AT JACKMAN GALLERY

CASH PAID

OPENS ON APRIL 15

■ Glen Eira Mayor Cr Jamie Hyams opened the Out And About exhibition of local artists, which continues until April 15 tath e Council Gallery, , Cnr Glen Eira and Hawthorn Rds, Caulfield.

Works on exhibition include those

by Marie-Louise Anderson, Timothy Casten,Yvette Coppersmith, Jessie Lewis, Dominique Plumanns, Emily Schilg, Shoso Shimbo and Susan Taylor.

Old Treasury 150th birthday

■ Some 150 years on, the heritage listed Old Treasury Building remains one of Melbourne’s most iconic and historically significant public buildings.

To coincide with the 150th celebrations a fascinating exhibition,Gold and Governors: 150 years of the Old Treasury Building opens on Tuesday April 17, providing visitors with a glimpse into the marvellous history of one of Melbourne’s finest buildings.

“Gold and Governors illustrates the life and works of the young architect JJ Clark through a number of original works by the architect, including drawings, paintings and plans of the Old Treasury Building and a variety of his Victorian and interstate building designs which have been compiled from Public Record OfficeVictoria’s collection as well as a number of lenders.

■ The Jackman Gallery will showcase the latest exhibition work of successful Melbourne based artists, Mark Farrelly and Nina Ryan.

The joint exhibition will open on April 15, running until May 5. Opening drinks with the artists will be from 3pm until 5pm on Sunday, April 15. The gallery is at 60 Inkerman St, St Kilda.

“Both Farrelly and Ryan have a very clear idea of their realitym,” says Gallery spokesman Ruth Parkinson.

“Though polar in their depiction, both artists are interested in discussing the tensions found within landscapes and surrounding environments.

“Next to each other they turn the exhibition space at the Jackman Gallery into a poignant landscape itself making for a compelling exhibition.

“Influenced by artists such as the Starn Twins, Farrelly is interested in pushing the boundaries of photography technically and physically.

“The work is not 'perfect' - multiple prints form a single image as the photographs are often cut and collaged together.

“Digital technology gives the photographer greater control over the content of the image.

“Like a painter, Farrelly is able to create an image that represents his feelings and world view, rather than using the camera to merely document.

“The use of paint further blurs the line between the real and imagined worlds as the image extends beyond the edge of the photograph.

“While in comparison, Ryan's approach draws on the traditional, with an expressionist representation of landscapes using a subtle colour palate.

“Ryan states in reference to her work: ‘These paintings are concerned with the balance between abstraction and representation.

‘The images derive directly from nature, and

Military heritage ■ The Old Post Office Seymour Art Gallery and Restaurant continues its newly opened Autumn Art and Military Heritage Exhibition until May 13.

Artists include John Orlando Birt, Meg Heres, Kate Ferguson, Ilma Duncan, Joe Attard, David Corke, David Taylor, Gregory R Smith, Kevin Boucher, Agnes Szetey, Malcolm Beattie and Janette GeorgeShambrook.

Artists are also exhibiting their other works, including wildlife, for the Autumn Show.

Entry is free at all times.

Wed.-Sun. 11am-4pm, and Wed.Sat. evenings 6pm-9pm at 50 Emily St, Seymour. Phone 5792 3170. www.artsseymour.com.au

ALL SUBURBS

Antiques, Bric-a-brac CHINA, GLASS, JEWELLERY, FURNITURE, CLOCKS, TOYS, LIGHTS, SILVER, POSTCARDS, AUSTRALIANA, BOXED CUTLERY, LINEN & LACE HOUSE LOTS, ANY SIZE Wanted To Buy DESPERATELY SEEKING

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Large selection of furniture, Carlton-ware, Moorcroft, Australian pottery, Wedgwood, jewellery, sporting memorabilia, toys and much more

● Arboresence aim to communicate feelings for the land - the premise being that nature is more in depth than on the surface.

‘A work of art is the outcome of knowledge and emotion organized in such a way that the painting lives autonomously through the life contained in it - the boundaries between abstraction and representation become blurred."

Further works from the artists can be viewed online at www.jackmangallery.com.au/exhibition Having opened in 2001 the Jackman Gallery is now recognised as one of Melbourne's largest contemporary art galleries with more than60 artists on its books. Adjacent to the gallery is the stockroom housing artworks from previous exhibitions.

And we buy - single items, collections, house lots or deceased estates www.camberwellantiquecentre.com.au

COBURG 103 Holmes St COME IN Brunswick HILL East AND ANTIQUES Ph 9383 5743 Open Tue-Sun LOOK! It’s A Pleasure!

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This DISCOUNT rate is available when you order a package of 8 monthly ads.

Business Card Size Ad 50mm height x 62mm width

Only $31.25 Order a package of 8 monthly ads for a total of $250. We will also give you a FREE $40 weekly listing in the Melbourne Trader Classifieds.

Antiques & Collectables Antiques and Collectables freatures will be published in the first week of each month from February 2012.

Advertisers will receive a free weekly classified ad listing in the Melbourne Trader section of the Melbourne Observer, plus a free website listing.

For more details, contact Ash Long

Phone 9439 7070

YOUR GUIDE TO ‘ANTIQUES & COLLECTABLES’ IN VICTORIA

Page 26 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 Melbourne

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Railway Feature

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Observer

Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 - Page 51

Observer Extra

FELICITY TAKES OUT AWARD

■ Felicity Urquhart, presenter of Saturday Night Country on ABC Local Radio, has been announced as the winner of the 2011 Country Music Association (CMA) International Country BroadcasterAward.

The award recognises outstanding achievement by radio broadcasters outside the United States who have made important contributions toward the development of country music in their country.

It was presented to Felicity

by Dierks Bentley just prior to his performance at the CMC Rocks The Hunter Festival.

"I am truly shocked by this Award and consider it such an honour," said Urquhart.

"Thank you CMA for this acknowledgement. Presenting Saturday Night Country nationally every week is a passion and brings me great enjoyment.

“The support of ABC Local Radio makes country music accessible and current from anywhere in Australia.

“It is wonderful to be part of their programming. I must importantly thank John Nutting who handed his show to me after 17 years. His faith in me is the reason I am in radio."

“We’re thrilled Felicity has been recognised for her work on the program," said Tony Rasmussen, Manager, Regional Local Radio.

News Briefs Gordon Southern show ■ Gordon Southern presents A Brief History of History at the Forum Theatre until April 22.

This ambitious attempt to cover the complete history of civilisation, with jokes, in one hour, follows the sell-out success of Southern’s 2011 show, Free Range.

All of history will be explored in hardly any detail in a mixture of storytelling, tiny bursts of music and lightning quick audience interaction.

Performance Dates: Until ● Gordon Southern April 22 (not Mondays).

Bookings: Forum Theatre 1300 660 013 or www. ticketmaster.com.au

Comedy Festival opens

● Rob Potts, Felicity Urquhart and Dierks Bentley "She really has continued can be heard nationally on ciation has more than 11,000 on the tradition of Saturday ABC Local Radio from 10pm members, consisting of music Night Country being the home every Saturday Night, as well industry professionals and of country music on ABC Ra- as on ABC Country (Digital companies around the globe.

Formed in 1958 the dio across Australia.

Radio) and streaming from organisation serves as an edu“Thanks to CMA for the abc.net.au/country. award. It is greatly appreciFor program details go cational and professional resource, advancing the growth ated.” abc.net.au/snc Saturday Night Country The Country Music Asso- of country music .

Places To Go This Easter

● Liz and John Furey at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival.

Photo: Malcolm Threadgold

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Places To Go This Easter

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Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 - Page 53

Places To Go This Easter

Open Friday-Monday 10am-5pm Open everyday throughout Easter

Page 54 - Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Places To Go This Easter

Specialising in classes, Cardmaking, Invitations and scrapbooking supplies

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Melbourne Observer - Wednesday, April 4, 2012 - Page 55

Places To Go This Easter

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Melbourne Buying Guide

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Melbourne Observer

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