WORDS

DIRECTIONS: Every line, vertical and horizontal, and all nine 9-square boxes must each contain the numbers 1 though 9. Solution on page 14.

31. _____ Building (in downtown Augusta)

32. Expanse of grass 35. It keeps pills in place

Humble dwelling

Black bird

Go back in

Test

Small medicated lozenge; pastille

Augusta’s ______ Market

Noted architect

Capital of South Korea

DIRECTIONS: Recreate a timeless nugget of wisdom by using the letters in each vertical column to fill the boxes above them. Once any letter is used, cross it out in the lower half of the puzzle. Letters may be used only once. Black squares indicate spaces between words, and words may extend onto a second line.

Solution on page 14.

Use the letters provided at bottom to create words to solve the puzzle above. All the listed letters following #1 are the first letters of the various words; the letters following #2 are the second letters of each word, and so on. Try solving words with letter clues or numbers with minimal choices listed. A sample is shown. Solution on page 14.

When it comes to online chats, if a girl says she’s 18, she’s probably 16. If she says she’s 16, she’s probably 14. And if she says she’s 14, she’s probably 52.

Moe: Man, dating in my 30s is like being a Chinese spy balloon.

Joe: How so?

Moe: I’m the size of three school buses and I keep getting shot down.

Moe: What do you call two birds in love?

Joe: Tweethearts.

Moe: What’s the best kind of triangle to ask out on a date?

Joe: Acute triangle.

Moe: If someone who hates Christmas is called a Grinch, what do you call someone who hates Valentines Day?

Joe: Single.

A man from Georgia dies and winds up in hell. The devil greets him with a cruel laugh and gleefully warns him that things are about to get hot.

“No problem,” the man says. “I’m used to it. I’m from Augusta.”

“We’ll see about that,” says the devil, and walks over to a thermostat and cranks up the temperature to 100° with humidity at 80%.

“How do feel now?” the devil asks the man.

“Love it! Just like a spring day back home.”

So the devil goes back to the thermostat, this time putting the dial at 150° with 90% humidity. “How do like that?” asks the devil.

“Reminds me of summertime in Georgia.”

“I’m through playing with you,” says the devil angrily, jacking up the heat to 200° with 100% humidity. When he goes back to check on the man, he’s sweating and fanning himself but otherwise doesn’t seem to be suffering too much. “I’m fine,” he says.

“That is about to change!” screams the devil, and he goes back to the thermostat and this time turns the temperature to 150 degrees below zero. Icicles are everywhere. The devil’s domain is now a frozen wasteland. He returns to check on the man from Georgia and is shocked to see him jumping up and down in obvious joy. The devil wants to know what’s going on.

“The Falcons won the Super Bowl! The Falcons won the Super Bowl!”

Moe: I predicted the Super Bowl score before the game even started. Accurately too.

Joe: You did?

Moe: I sure did. 0 - 0.

Moe: Why is it impossible to eat baklava underground?

Joe: Because down there it’s bakmagma.