MegaZEN Well-Being Journal - Volume 5

CONSCIOUSNESS | ENTELECHY | INTENTIONAL HEALING COMMUNIT Y

Covering important topics like: Why Children Become Bullies, Aggressive Academic Education, Waldorf Education Philosophy, Homeschooling, Safe Disposable Diapers and much more.

A Healing Gesture of a Gift from

Dr. Habib Sadeghi & Dr. Sherry Sami www.beingclarity.com

CONTENTS MEGAZEN VOLUME 5

AGAINST THE GRAIN The long-term consequences of high grain consumption

CHILD INTERRUPTED Why the rush to early academic education is harming children and altering childhood

UNCONSCIOUS EXPOSURE Simple choices we’re making that increase our cancer risk

P. 12

P. 54

P. 32

THE DIAPER DILEMMA Convenience comes with caution when using disposable diapers

WHAT LOVE DOES Taking a closer look at the Love Button Global Movement

P. 66

INSIDE THE BULLY BRAIN Why kids become bullies and what parents can do to prevent it P. 22

P. 92 CREATIVE DISCIPLINE, CONNECTED FAMILY: Parenting ideas for young children P. 46

HOW TO HAVE A MISERABLE MARRIAGE 10 steps to guarantee you’re happily neverafter P. 134

PLUS MORE DELICIOUS CONTENT TO INSPIRE YOUR SOUL, STIMULATE YOUR MIND AND DAZZLE YOUR VISUAL SENSES:

Living on Purpose, Of Tempers & Temperaments, Compulsive Connection, The Toxic Leeching of Nutrients, Our DNA is Listening to Us, Awakening the Leader Within, Slip of the Tongue, Zen Pencils’ Guest House by Rumi, Human Breeds, Being Beautiful, Be Hive Self-Nurturing Menu, Poetry Lounge, Annual Meditation Minutes, Be Hive Gallery and more...

VIRTUAL CHILD OF MIND & MEDICINE How what we think about ourselves and others shapes our health

Examining the impact of too much technology on children P. 74

P. 124

REGENERATION REVOLUTION The incredible healing power of stem cell therapy P. 150

LEARNING FROM LOSS The personal nature of processing grief P. 80

EMANCIPATING EDUCATION Exploring the freedom of homeschooling TROUBLE ON TAP Understanding and avoiding the dangerous contaminants in tap water P. 154

P. 84

MEGAZEN VOLUME 5 ADDRESS

Children & Choices

Welcome to another edition of MegaZEN. We work hard all year to bring you in-depth, usable information that you can apply in simple ways to improve your life. Some of the topics we cover come from our personal experiences, while others are inspired by current events, or happen to be issues we want to explore. In any case, it’s always our intention to provide you with content that gets your thoughts and life moving in a new direction. We hope you find that to be the case with our newest and best issue yet.

Choosing which articles to publish and which to hold back is always a difficult task because we want to share so much with you! After we finalized the editorial schedule, however, we noticed something - about a third of the features focused on issues dealing with children. While it’s always been a priority for us to raise awareness about children’s issues, especially with regard to parenting, education, and healthcare, this edition takes a closer look at these important topics in a way that perhaps we haven’t done before. As such, we’ve proudly declared 2017 the Year of the Child and this issue the Children & Choices edition.

In it, you’ll find exciting and informative features that explore issues such as why children become bullies, how to react if your child is bullied, and what to do if your child happens to be the bully. We examine the current trend of introducing children as young as four to aggressive academic education and how that approach may be harming their development in serious ways. Included is a profile on Rudolf Steiner and his Waldorf education philosophy, which can serve as a healthier alternative for early childhood education. Because California now requires all public and private school children to be vaccinated, and has removed the personal and religious exemptions, we investigate the option of homeschooling, and demystify the process that parents use to educate nearly 3 million children in America every year.

We also explore the options for safe, non-toxic disposal diapers, how cloth diapers have been modernized for ease and affordability, and why there is a resurgence in their popularity. Because children are exposed to electronic notebooks, cell phones, and other gadgets at earlier ages, we shed some light on how overuse of technology affects the developing brain and why it’s important for parents to establish limits when it comes to the use of electronics by their children.

In addition, you’ll find other great articles on various topics, such as how to find a new purpose in life, and what’s really in the tap water you’re drinking, as well as lots of other informative pieces. We have also included a wonderful tongue-in-cheek, anti-self-help piece about how to have a miserable marriage!

Thank you for being a part of our intentional healing family. MegaZEN continues to be one of our favorite ways to provide love and support to you, in appreciation for the joy you bring to us all year long.

In Love & Gratitude

Dr. Habib Sadeghi & Dr. Sherry Sami

ften, when people find themselves in a challenging situation where the outcome is uncertain, they will use the popular phrase, “Hope for the best and plan for the worst,” and that’s exactly how they proceed, wishing for a good result while preparing for a disaster. It’s been said that hope is like a pessimist looking at the world optimistically, things probably won’t turn out well, but it would be nice if they did. When the situation finally does fall apart, these people brag about how lucky they were to be so prepared, never realizing that their expectation of disaster played a crucial role in bringing it into existence.

THE POWER OF EXPECTATION OUR EXPECTATIONS OF HOW A SITUATION WILL TURN OUT INFLUENCE THE ACTUAL OUTCOME DR. HABIB SADEGHI & DR. SHERRY SAMI

8

Science has known for quite some time that our expectations of how a situation will turn out influence the actual outcome.

That’s why, in order to ensure the highest degree of accuracy, most medical research is performed as a double blind study.

This means that neither the participants nor the professionals administering the study know the critical aspects of the experiment. For example, if a research study on a new pain reliever were being conducted, neither the patients nor the people administering the treatment would know who would be receiving the actual medication and who would be receiving the placebo. This is done to minimize the effect the expectations of the patients and administrators can have on the final results.

In a frequency-based universe, thoughts become things.

Because of this fact, our expectations are the coming attractions

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

“In a frequency-based universe, thoughts become things. Because of this fact, our expectations are the coming attractions of our lives.” the rest of the care staff. This is why at Be Hive of Healing, we strive to create an intentional healing community, not just by direct service, but through expectation as well. Our medical facility carries the Be Hive name because we want everyone to remember the kind of culture we foster here. We are a collective of beings who have chosen to come together to support, nurture, and protect each other. We do this through our love, and our positive intentions and expectations, for the purpose of healing.

We see every patient who walks into our office as whole, and hold the intention and expectation for their full recovery.

William Shakespeare said in Hamlet, Act IV, Scene V, “Lord, we know what we are, but know not what we may be.” We see every patient as the full manifestation of all that they may be.

We see them as robustly healthy, and hold the expectation that this robust health is in the process of becoming their physical reality.

of our lives. If we react to someone in a certain way, we justify our reaction because we “know how he/she is,” when in reality, we had that reaction based on what we expected of him/ her. Does that sound strange? Not only do our expectations affect the circumstances of our lives, but the expectations we hold of other people affect their life situations, and in turn, the expectations they hold about us do the same.

Robert Rosenthal of Harvard Medical School is most widely known for his early work in psychology, namely the effect of expectancy. In his most famous study, he labeled one cage of rats as “bright” and another as “dull.” Although all the rats were completely the same, he told his students that the bright rats were tested as highly intelligent, while the dull ones suffered a mental deficit. Over the course of a week, the students timed their rats as they made several runs through a maze. While there was no difference in intelligence between the rats, the ones the students perceived to be smarter and expected to navigate the maze easily, were twice as fast as the rats they thought of as dumb and expected to fail. Further studies have not only demonstrated that a teacher’s expectations affect how students perform on tests, but have also shown that when a military trainer has high expectations of his/her soldiers, the soldiers will run faster.

In healthcare, positive expectations are essential for recovery.

It begins with the patient, but also extends to the physician and

When on the road to recovery, it’s important to create a cocoon of healing expectancy for yourself. Of course, this should include a physician who understands the power of expectation and intention, as well as family and friends who are truly expecting the best possible outcome for you. Energetically speaking, friends and family can do more harm than good by worrying about a loved one’s condition or prognosis. While it’s understandable to be concerned, the best thing anyone can do who loves someone who is sick, is to expect the best outcome and carry a vision of that person as vibrantly healthy, especially when interacting with him/her. To worry is to pray for what you don’t want!

While the expectations of others can certainly influence our experiences, nothing can trump the power of the expectations we hold for ourselves. How many times have we heard stories about someone who no one believed in and had the odds stacked against him, go on to become a huge success? To have none, or worse, negative expectations for yourself is to fail before you even begin. Shakespeare also said in Hamlet, “For ‘tis the sport to have the engineer hoist with his own petard.”

In the 16th century, a machine of war was referred to as an engine. To “hoist with his own petard” referred to someone being blown up by his own bomb. That is the power of your expectations. They can either save you or destroy you.

Expect only the best for yourself in every area of your life, and surround yourself with people who love you enough to do the same. Ancient wisdom tells us that when two or more people are gathered together holding the same expectation and intention, their manifestation power is greatly magnified.

Also remember to sincerely expect, not wish for, the best for others. We get what we give in life, and when we expect the best for others, we experience the best as well.

9

Cancer-Killing Viruses?

Researchers seek to find the right virus to attack cancer DR. HABIB SADEGHI AND DR. SHERRY SAMI

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

ecently, researchers in the U.S. and Canada have been achieving encouraging results in cancer patients with a rather unusual treatment. Viruses have an uncanny ability to get inside cells, and scientists are genetically engineering them to track proteins specific to cancer. Once the virus penetrates the cancer cell, it begins replicating itself until the cancer cell dies without harming the healthy cells around it. At this point, the cancer’s cloaking mechanism is also destroyed, allowing the body’s immune system to recognize the dead cells as invaders and remove them from the body. This process is known as oncolytic virus treatment.

Although the treatment seems promising, it’s understandable that some, if not many patients, might be reluctant to have large doses of a live virus injected directly into their bloodstream. This is likely because most patients experience all the symptoms of the virus. The Mayo Clinic recently had success with a number of patients with myeloma, a blood cancer, when they used the measles virus to eradicate the cancer. The virus is known to seek out and attack the type of white blood cell from which myeloma arises. In the process, the patients became feverish and ill, just as they would with the measles. While the virus destroyed the cancer cells, their immune systems destroyed the measles virus and removed it from their bodies, along with what was left of the cancer.

At present, there is some debate about whether it’s actually the virus that’s killing the cancer by entering the cancer cell, or the body’s immune system that’s being stimulated by the introduction of the virus and then destroying the virus along with the cancer. It has been known for over a century that fever associated with an illness puts the immune system in high gear. In the process of eradicating the pathogen, virtually all other dangerous organisms present in the body are destroyed as well. There are many recorded cases of patients contracting various fever-related illnesses and within days having their cancers disappear, never to return.

“For many years, the medical community has speculated that it might be best to let the human immune system do its own heavy lifting when it comes to disease.”

In 1884, physician, William B. Coley, read the case of German immigrant, Fred Stein, who suffered from a cheek sarcoma that was considered hopeless.

After contracting erysipelas, a postoperative skin disease, Stein developed a high fever, after which his cancer disappeared within days. There was no trace of recurrence in six years of follow up. Eventually, Dr. Coley’s research would turn up over 40 cases of recovery from cancer after a fever, each more dramatic than the next.

Recognizing the connection, Dr. Coley decided to see if a pathogen could be administered therapeutically. The result would become known as Coley’s toxin, an injection that included the bacteria s. pyogenes and s. marcscenes, which are known to cause throat, skin, eye, urinary tract, and respiratory infections. Dr. Coley administered his injection in increasing doses over 10 weeks to a 16-year-old boy with an inoperable abdominal tumor.

Naturally, the boy became very ill with fever, but over the course of the treatment, his tumor continued to shrink and eventually disappeared.

The tumor never returned during the 20 years of follow up he maintained with Dr. Coley.

Over time, Dr. Coley had trouble producing consistent results with his toxin, perhaps because it contained only dead samples of the bacteria.

By the 1920s, radiation had been introduced and was seen as the revolutionary “high tech” treatment for cancer. As a result, Dr. Coley’s work faded into the background, even though patients with Ewing’s sarcoma who were receiving his treatment remained cancer-free after five years, while those who received radiation died within the same time period.

In the 1950s, the hospital that would become Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center was witnessing significant tumor shrinkage after treating lymphoma patients with

“It has been known for over a century that fever associated with an illness puts the immune system in high gear.”

West Nile Virus. When many patients began to get drowsy and confused after treatment, researchers feared they were contracting the disease, and the trials were closed. That was the end of oncolytic virus treatment until just a few years ago.

Today, much of the research revolves around finding the right virus to attack a specific kind of cancer. This isn’t a one-size-fits-all process. As unnerving as it might sound, experiments are being conducted with many viruses including measles (for myeloma), HIV (for leukemia), and even small pox.

Although all pathogens are sterilized, it’s understandable that patients would have concerns. Undoubtedly, after the further studies that are necessary before this treatment becomes widely available, all of our concerns will be addressed, and all of our questions answered.

The most interesting fact in all of this is that if a patient has been previously vaccinated for the virus that best targets his or her cancer, oncolytic virus therapy will not work. The patient’s own antibodies will trigger the immune system into action much too soon, destroying the therapeutic virus before it has a chance to create any symptoms like fever, or enter the cancer cells. In the Mayo Clinic study, mentioned at the beginning of this article, the patients’ lack of immunity was critical to its success and their recovery from cancer. This is of much concern, especially among those who have failed to respond to all other treatments and may look to onclytic virus treatment as their lifeline.

For many years, the medical community has speculated that it might be best to let the human immune system do its own heavy lifting when it comes to disease. Each bout of illness serves to strengthen the immune system’s function and overall response. By artificially boosting it, we may be causing it to atrophy, and creating a false sense of security at times when we need it the most.

11

AGAINST THE GRAIN The long-term consequences of high grain consumption

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

here’s an interesting thing about bones. They reveal a lot about a person’s health, especially after they’re dead. Just ask any archaeologist or anthropologist.

What’s fascinating about bones in general is that there’s a distinct difference between bones found from before about 5,000 BC and those from more recent skeletons. Molecular gerontology research consistently shows that the much older bones have greater density and are four times heavier than more recent specimens. Not only that, but they show none of the disease markers of later skeletons such as arthritis, crooked teeth, stunted growth, osteoporosis, and so on. These later skeletons are also about 10% shorter.1 What could have happened around 7,000 years ago that affected the bones of human beings all around the world in such significant and similar ways? It was the dawn of agriculture, when humans took up the cultivation of grains. The poor health of many bones as far back as 3,000 years ago, and the fact that celiac disease and gluten intolerance are skyrocketing today, while books like Wheat Belly, Grain Brain, and No Grain, No Pain are flying off the shelves, indicate (along with lots of research), that grains are as big a problem for us today as they were for our ancient ancestors. It seems clear that we probably shouldn’t be eating them if we want to avoid chronic disease.

INCOMPATIBLE EVOLUTION But isn’t bread the “staff of life”? What about manna from heaven? How could such an integral food staple like grains be bad for us? Humans have been eating (and suffering from) grains for so long that it seems we’ve always eaten them, but that’s not true.

Grains cause so much trouble because we really aren’t genetically evolved or adapted to digest them.

People living today share 99.9% of their DNA with humans who lived more than 40,000 years ago,2 well before the dawn of agriculture. They weren’t planting sprawling fields of wheat or oats, and baking loaves of bread. As hunter-gatherers, they would never have spent the hours required searching for enough wild wheat to feed themselves. Considering the amount of processing grains and legumes need to go through just to be edible (soaking, fermenting, grinding, baking, cooking, etc.), we probably shouldn’t be eating them.

Our ancient ancestors weren’t eating them either and would never have spent their valuable hunting time doing these things, not to mention the fact that they only had a very limited use and control of fire. Even samples of human corprolites, fossilized feces, from 300,000-50,000 years

14

“Grains, which are the seeds of grasses, want to get into the ground and sprout. In order to prevent being eaten before that happens, they contain some particularly powerful poisons.”

ago show no plant matter of any kind.3 They were eating predominantly animal protein and the healthy fats that came with it, organ meats, eggs, fish, and even insects. They also ate what they could find of nuts, seeds, plants, and fruit when they weren’t locked in an ice age (when vegetation of any kind was not available for very long periods of time). Oh, and they were eating all of it raw, which fortunately we don’t have to do today, and isn’t recommended. This is a diet high in healthy saturated and monounsaturated fats and omega-3 fatty acids, which has nearly 10 times the nutrient density of minerals and vitamins like A, D, E and K than our modern diet.

DANGEROUS DEFENSES When I speak of grains, I’m not just talking about wheat, which gets all the press these days. I’m talking about all of them, including wheat in all its forms (kamut, spelt and so on), oats, barley, rye, rice, and corn (yes, a grain, not a vegetable), as well as grain pulses including all beans and legumes like lentils and peanuts (a legume, not a nut), soybeans, and potatoes.

Why are grains and legumes so damaging to our health? Toxins—lots and lots of toxins. You see, all living creatures have a way of defending themselves from attack. Since plants have neither teeth nor claws, or legs to run away, they fight back with toxins and anti-nutrients that over time destroy their attacker’s digestive system and health so they die and eventually stop feeding on them. Grains, which are the seeds of grasses, want to get into the ground and sprout. In order to prevent being eaten before that happens, they contain some particularly powerful poisons.

P H YT I C AC I D

Phytic acid binds to minerals like magnesium, calcium, iron, and zinc, preventing us from absorbing them, leading to deficiencies. It’s estimated that half the population is deficient in magnesium, and it’s likely due to heavy grain consumption. Third World countries, where grains make up as much as 80% of the diet, show epidemic levels of deficiency in these crucial minerals. When the body can’t get the calcium it needs, it leaches it from the bones. Is it any wonder osteoporosis is so high in the U.S., especially among women, whose diets can consist of up to 60% grain products? Magnesium deficiency plays a role in diabetes, metabolic syndrome, heart attack, atherosclerosis, colon cancer, and even migraines. Phytic acid also interferes with the assimilation of vitamins D, A, C, and B12.

Unfortunately, whole grains, the kind we’re encouraged to eat, have the highest levels of phytic acid.

15

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

E N ZYM E I N H I B I TO R S These substances block enzymes like amylase (carbs), protease (protein), and lipase (fats), and prevent them from working properly. This puts an enormous demand on the body’s reserves of metabolic enzymes to break through the barrier, and can eventually result in the inability to digest certain kinds of food.

GOITROGENS These chemical agents wreak havoc on thyroid gland production. Disruptive thyroid conditions such as hypothyroidism and Hashimoto’s thyroiditis are rampant in women, in particular, who live in areas where grains are a primary source of the population’s diet.

These are proteins that damage the microvilli, the delicate brush border in the intestines, and interfere with the absorption of nutrients. They also create perforations in the tight junctions of the intestinal lining, allowing undigested food particles to escape into the bloodstream creating an immune response as the body rushes to attack these “invaders.” Lectins, which have protein sequences almost identical to human tissue, can also slip through the holes they create. As the immune system memorizes the protein sequence of the lectins and gets busy attacking them, it can easily become confused through molecular mimicry and start attacking its own tissue as well, creating a full blown auto-immune response. The LECTINS amino acid profile of the lectin in wheat is nearly identical to that found in joint cartilage and the myelin sheath that protects our nerves. By a larger percentage, women tend to be drawn to vegetarian and vegan diets which rely heavily on grains. This may be one clue as to why, of the 23.5 million people in the U.S. that suffer from auto-immune disease, 75% of them are women. When we look at the women to men ratios for specific auto-immune diseases, it’s even worse: Hashimoto’s thyroiditis, 10:1, Grave’s disease, 7:1, and lupus, 9:1. Stomach acid, digestive enzymes and even cooking can’t destroy lectins because they’re heat stable and have been found biologically active in human feces.

Gluten actually means glue and is the binder used in wallpaper paste.

It’s the grain protein that gives dough its elasticity and also causes celiac disease. Found in most grains and beans, it works in conjunction with another protein called zonulin to destroy the microvilli and tight junctions of the small intestines. Researchers have stated, “This protein, when up-regulated, appears to play a key role in the pathogenesis of autoimmune disorders.” By the time someone is officially diagnosed with celiac disease, their microvilli are almost entirely destroyed, leading to a life of severe, chronic malabsorption. Research published in the Journal G LU T E N of the American Medical Association showed that those with celiac disease or even gluten sensitivity have a significantly higher risk of death, particularly from heart disease or cancer. The medical journal, Gastroenterology, compared 10,000 blood samples from 50 years ago to today, and discovered that celiac disease has increased by 400%. Gluten is also suspected of playing a role in depression because it destroys the gut lining, where 90% of serotonin is produced. This means that the body doesn’t have access to this vital mood-stabilizing hormone.

16

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

“Why is sugar such a danger?

Because it plays a major role in almost all chronic diseases including cancer, cardiovascular disease, and of course, diabetes.” account for all the starchy carbs likes grains and legumes that quickly turn into sugar once inside the body. Most people are completely unaware of this hidden sugar, even if they’re doing their best to avoid added sugar and eat a healthy diet.

Why is sugar such a danger? Because it plays a major role in almost all chronic diseases including cancer, cardiovascular disease, and of course, diabetes. Sugar in the bloodstream, outside of a very narrow range, is highly toxic and inflammatory. Consistent consumption of high levels of processed sugary foods and grains causes large insulin surges that are needed to get that sugar out of the bloodstream ASAP and inside the cells to be stored as glycogen for future use. As high levels of sugar consumption continue, the insulin receptors on the cells, which are responsible for removing glucose from the bloodstream, eventually become numbed out and unresponsive as blood sugar levels skyrocket. Now the cells require massive amounts of insulin, far more than the body can produce, to shock their receptors into accepting the sugar and removing it from the bloodstream. This is diabetes.

SWEET SUBVERSION The other hidden danger of grains and legumes is what they turn into after they enter the body—sugar.

All carbohydrates break down into sugar (glucose) in the body, and all starches (grains, legumes, and the products made from them like bread, pasta, crackers, cookies, etc.) break down into sugar very quickly, causing insulin to spike. To the body, starch = sugar; there is no difference. In fact, any respectable nutritionist will tell you that a baked potato and a 12 oz. can of soda both break down to about 50g of glucose in the body. It’s these high glycemic foods that not only cause us to gain weight, but create regular insulin surges that damage our health in serious ways. It’s a very big reason why diabetes now affects 16.9% of the Hispanic/Latino population, which consumes a diet heavy in wheat, corn, rice and beans, on top of the sugar in the processed foods they’re already eating. In Mexico, the diabetes rate is 18.3%. By the age of 70, 50% of Hispanic/Latina women, and 44.3% of men can expect to be diagnosed with diabetes.

Americans consume, on average, about 130 lbs. of sugar per person per year. That’s 26.5 lb. bags of sugar.

These statistics only examine added sugar in things like sodas, candy, cookies, desserts, and such. It doesn’t

One of insulin’s functions is cholesterol synthesis.

It’s also the trigger for certain enzymes to make more cholesterol, and elevated insulin increases the oxidation of LDL “bad” cholesterol particles. This sets off an immune reaction where macrophages (white blood cells) attack the oxidized LDL inside the arteries creating an inflammatory response which leaves bits of the neutralized cholesterol in its wake. It’s these bio-available bits of cholesterol that the body uses to line its delicate arteries with a plaque coating as protection against the next oxidative attack. Over time, this leads to a narrower pathway for blood to flow through, which forces the heart to work harder. Elevated insulin also causes the kidneys to excrete magnesium and potassium in high amounts, which sets the stage for heart arrhythmias and life-threatening fibrillations. At the same time, insulin also signals the production of fibrinogen, the substance that causes the blood to clot. Excess sugar also causes cells in tissue to become more rigid. They slowly lose their flexibility and elasticity through a process called glycation, and when it affects the arteries, atherosclerosis is the result. Taken altogether, is this not the perfect recipe for heart disease and stroke? Contrary to popular belief, the primary cause of cardiovascular disease is sugar and the subsequent insulin responses it triggers, not the consumption of fat and cholesterol.

This is why diabetics are twice as likely to suffer a heart attack or stroke, and why they carry the same

17

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

risk for heart disease as a non-diabetic who’s 15 years older. By the time they reach their late 40s, a diabetic’s lifespan is shortened an average of 18 years due to risk of heart disease and stroke, and none of it has to do with fat or cholesterol. You can find more information in The Great Cholesterol Con by Dr. Malcolm Kendrick, or by reading last year’s MegaZEN article, “The Big Fat Lie.” It’s sugar, not fat and cholesterol, that is proving to be a primary component in most major disease processes from cataracts to cancer, which doesn’t grow without the presence of insulin. Metabolic specialist, Dr. Michael Eades said it best years ago when he observed, “The diseases that insulin affects directly… are the cause of the vast majority of death and disability in the U.S. today.

They are the grim reapers of Western civilization.”

It was good news when the FDA eventually did away with its famous Food Pyramid, which emphasized heavy grain consumption. Those who followed it usually ended up very sick and looking like pyramids themselves—very bottom heavy. Unfortunately, the FDA’s new MyPlate recommendations aren’t much better. They suggest a daily diet that’s 55%-60% grains and fruit—all starch and sugar.

THE QUINOA QUESTION Lots of people ask about quinoa, which is actually the seed of the Chenopodium quinoa plant. Although a seed, it’s considered a grain crop and carries all the same toxins and anti-nutrients as grains, especially phytic acid. In fact, food research has shown that in order to remove over 95% of the phytic acid from quinoa, it must be soaked, germinated and lacto-fermented over the course of 58 hours before it’s cooked. While quinoa may have more protein than other grains, it’s not surprising that one cooked cup contains virtually the same amount of carbs as plain old white rice at 43.6g and 44.08g respectively.

The truth is, if it looks like a grain, cooks like a grain, and has the same texture and taste as a grain, it carries all the drawbacks of grains and should be avoided. This includes other grain mimics like amaranth, millet, and buckwheat.

18

MAKING THE TRANSITION It can be very difficult to reduce or even eliminate grains and legumes from your diet because of habit and their opiate-like addictive properties, but for all the reasons stated here, it is one of the best disease prevention and weight loss steps you can take. Try starting with just one meal, perhaps breakfast, as it’s often the most grain heavy meal of the day. Consider having an omelet with chicken, cheese, and lots of vegetables, or a great lowsugar green smoothie instead.

In reality, the human body was designed to burn fat rather than sugar for fuel, as fat has none of the drawbacks of glucose. Yes, the brain and red blood cells need a miniscule 50g of glucose for optimal function, but the body can easily synthesize glucose from protein and fat in the liver via gluconeogenesis. It’s how our ancient ancestors got through the very long ice ages.

In addition, the brain (which is 60% saturated fat) and heart work more efficiently when using fat for fuel. The important point to remember is that as long as you’re burning sugar for fuel, your body will treat dietary fat as excess calories that are then stored as fat. Fat doesn’t make you fat unless it’s in the presence of sugar and insulin. So, as you gradually reduce grains and legumes, be sure to replace those calories with healthy saturated fats like coconut oil, butter, and fat from grass-fed meats.

“Cereal grains as a staple food are a relatively recent addition to the human diet and represent a dramatic departure from those foods to which we are genetically adapted. Discordance between humanity’s genetically determined dietary needs and his [sic] present day diet is responsible for many of the degenerative diseases which plague industrial man…[T]here is a significant body of evidence which suggests that cereal grains are less than optimal foods for humans and that the human genetic makeup and physiology may not be fully adapted to high levels of cereal grain consumption.”—Dr. Loren Cordain, University of Colorado, Cereal Grains: humanity’s double edged sword.

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

SOURCES (1) Sisson, M. (2009). The Primal Blueprint: Reprogram your genes for

(9) Rubio-Tapia, A. (2009). Increased Prevalence and Mortality in

effortless weight loss, vibrant health and boundless energy. (1st ed., p.

Undiagnosed Celiac Disease. Gastroenterology , 137(1), 88-93.

17). Malibu: Primal Nutrition Inc.

(10) Diabetes Among Hispanics: All are not equal, (July 24,2014),

(2) Gedgaudas, N. (2009). Primal Body, Primal Mind. Rochester, Vermont:

American Diabetes Association, http://www.diabetes.org/newsroom/

Healing Arts Press.

press-releases/2014/diabetes-among-hispanics-all-are-not-equal.html.

Bryant, V. & Williams-Dean, G. (1974). Coprolites of Man. Scientific

(11) Walton, Alice, (August, 30, 2012), How much sugar are Americans

American, Inc., Retrieved from http://www.scribd.com/doc/83243120/ Coprolites-of-Man (3) Rosanoff, A. (2012). Suboptimal Magnesium Status in the United States: Are the health consequences underestimated?. Nutritional Reviews, 70(3), 153-164. doi: 10.1111/j.1753-4887.2011.00465.x.

(4) American Autoimmune and Related Diseases, Inc. (n.d.). Autoimmune Statistics. Retrieved from http://www.aarda.org/autoimmune-information/ autoimmune-statistics/ (5) Autoimmunity In Wikipedia. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/ wiki/Autoimmunity (6) Cordain, L. (1999). Cereal Grains: Humanity’s double-edged sword.

World Review of Nutrition and Dietetics, 84, 19-73. Retrieved from http:// www.direct-ms.org/pdf/EvolutionPaleolithic/Cereal Sword.pdf

eating?, Forbes, http://www.forbes.com/sites/alicegwalton/2012/08/30/ how-much-sugar-are-americans-eating-infographic/#221da5e21f71.

(12) Narwar, N. (2010). Diabetes mellitus, fasting blood glucose concentration, and risk of vascular disease: a collaborative meta-analysis of 102 prospective studies. The Lancet, 375(9733), 2215-2222. doi: 10.1016/ S0140-6736(10)60484-9 (13) Booth, G., & Kapral, M. (2006). Relation between age and cardiovascular disease in men and women with diabetes compared with non-diabetic people: a population-based retrospective cohort study. The Lancet, 368(9529), 29-36. doi: 10.1016/S0140-6736(06)68967-8 (14) Taubes, G. (2008). Good Calories, Bad Calories: Fats, carbs and the controversial science of diet and health. (1st ed.). New York: Anchor Books, Random House.

(15) Eades, M., & Eades, M. (1996). Protein Power: The high-protein/low

(7) Sapone, A. (2006). Zonulin upregulation is associated with increased

carbohydrate way to lose weight, feel fit and boost your health in just

gut permeability in subjects with type 1 diabetes and their relatives.

weeks. (1st ed.). New York: Bantam Books.

Diabetes, 55, 1441-1459.

(16) Reddy, N. Sathe, S. (2001). Food Phytates. Boca Raton: CRC press.

(8) Ludviggson, J. (2009). Small intestinal histopathology and mortality

(17) Taubes, G. (2002, July 7). What if it’s all been a big fat lie?. The New York

risk in celiac disease. Journal of the American Medical Association, 302(11),

Times. Retrieved from http://www.nytimes.com/2002/07/07/magazine/

1171-1178.

what-if-it-s-all-been-a-big-fat-lie.html

DR. HABIB SADEGHI & DR. SHERRY SAMI

OUR DNA IS LISTENING TO US

Communicating at the proper genetic frequency for healing It’s commonly known that only 10% of our DNA is used for building proteins and maintaining body growth, functions, and so on. Unfortunately, the other 90% is often referred to as “junk” DNA. How arrogant science is to assume that just because we don’t presently know what something does, it must be useless. Even common sense tells us that the mere fact that something exists in nature means it serves a purpose. Russian researchers currently working with linguists and geneticists are releasing scientific conclusions regarding our DNA that are

20

nothing short of revolutionary, particularly when it comes to health and healing.

“OUR DNA FOLLOWS A REGULAR STYLE OF GRAMMAR AND SET OF RULES JUST LIKE OUR LANGUAGES.” The research team has found that the genetic code, particularly for the other 90% of our DNA, follows the same rules as

all human language. The alkalines in our DNA organize themselves according to the rules of syntax, the same way words are assembled to create phrases and sentences. They even follow a system of semantics very similar to the study of meaning in language forms, and adhere to the rules of grammar. Think about that. Our DNA follows a regular style of grammar and set of rules, just like our languages.

Spiritual teachers and healers have known for thousands of years that prayer, affirmations, and chanting impact the

areas of the universe through which information can be transmitted outside of space and time. The DNA attracts these bits of information and then passes them on to our consciousness.

This is what the researchers are calling hyper-communication, which could be an explanation for phenomena such as clairvoyance and intuition.

Many animals and insects seem to be able to communicate in this fashion.

As long as she’s alive, a group of ants will go on with their building plans no matter how far the queen is from the colony because they continue to receive her communications and instructions through their interconnected collective consciousness. If she dies, all work stops and the ants move about in disarray.

body in a physical way to induce healing.

Science is now finally proving that our DNA is actually listening to us. In order to affect a conscious change in our bodies by communicating with our DNA, we have to communicate from the frequency of feeling that we already have what we desire.

In an interesting experiment, Russian biophysicist and molecular biologist, Pjotr Garjajev, was able to modulate a specific frequency pattern onto a laser ray and with it, change the frequency of the DNA and ultimately, the genetic information itself.1 Since the basic structure of DNAalkaline pairs and language are the same, no DNA decoding or splicing was necessary to create this change.

With this same method, the Russian team has been successful in repairing chromosomes that were previously damaged by x-rays. In additional studies, chromosomes, which Garjajev said functioned, “just like solitonic/holographic computers,” always reacted to languagemodulated laser rays, provided the proper

frequency was being used. This means with the proper intention and vibration, our words are enough to reprogram our genes and ignite the healing process within us.

“WITH THE PROPER INTENTION AND VIBRATION, OUR WORDS ARE ENOUGH TO REPROGRAM OUR GENES AND IGNITE THE HEALING PROCESS WITHIN US.” It’s entirely normal for our DNA to react to language. This explains why things like hypnosis and guided visualization can be so effective in terms of physical healing. Perhaps more controversial has been the finding that our DNA can cause disturbances in the vacuum, resulting in microscopic wormholes that create connections between entirely different

DNA-based information downloads from the universe might also explain why a genius inventor like Nikola Tesla could envision his inventions in their completed form and create them with virtually no modifications. In the same way, musical genius, Mozart, was said to have composed his operas, symphonies, and sonatas as if taking dictation directly from God, so much so that virtually none of his original compositions show any signs of handwritten corrections.

Our so-called “junk” DNA is turning out to be anything but useless, and it’s widely thought that thousands of year ago, humans had a high mastery of conscious control over its power. Just the fact that DNA is intimately interconnected with our language is reason enough to take a second look at the underrated affirmation as a powerful healing tool, as well as how we speak about our health in general conversation. This is also the likely reason why nearly all spiritual philosophies make some reference to and use of the power of words to create physical change, either in our bodies or the world, for example: “So shall my word that goeth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing unto which I sent it.”

(1) Fosar, Grazyna. Bludorf, Franz. Scientist prove DNA can be reprogrammed by words and frequencies. Dr. Joe Dispenza Blog. (2015).

21

Inside the Bully Brain

WHY KIDS BECOME BULLIES AND WHAT PARENTS CAN DO TO PREVENT IT

BY DR. HABIB SADEGHI

nyone who has ever been bullied in school never forgets the experience. Long into adulthood, it’s easy to recall the names and faces of the kids who stole our lunch money, excluded us from social groups, humiliated us in front of others, beat us up, and basically made our lives a living terror between 8:00am and 3:00pm five days a week. It’s easy to recall these memories because to a large extent, bullying is traumatizing to children. Unfortunately, much of it is written off as child’s play by adults and school administrators who only enable the bullying cycle, as children are abandoned by the very people they trust and look to for protection.

It seems odd that theft, harassment, and physical abuse are all illegal in the adult word, and yet they’re not taken seriously when they happen in a school setting among children. As more schools that supposedly have a zero tolerance policy for bullying are failing to intercede for victimized students, more angry and frustrated parents are taking their school districts to court.1 More than three million students report being bullied every year,2 while 160,000 teens skip school every day because of bullying,3 but 25% of all teachers see nothing wrong with

such behavior and will only intervene 4% of the time.4 While adults often don’t see bullying as a legitimate problem, the children involved couldn’t disagree more.

The Kaiser Family Foundation and children’s broadcast network, Nickelodeon, teamed up to research what the biggest challenges were for school children between the ages of 8 and 15. Nearly 75% of the children between 8 and 11 said bullying was the number one problem in their school. For the 12 to 15-year-olds, it was 86%.

Bullying was a far bigger problem to these children than all other issues including smoking, alcohol use, drugs, or the pressure to have sex.5 To put an end to bullying, we must understand why children become bullies, and how parents may be contributing to the problem. At the same time, it’s important to know what to do if your child is being bullied and how to proceed if the school isn’t taking action. What do you do if you find out you’re the parent of a bully? Your reaction to the situation just might carry the most power of all to end the vicious cycle and bring the innocence back to childhood, not just for the victim, but for your son or daughter, as well.

BULLY BACKSTORY Collective research over the years has shown that bullies aren’t born, they’re made, and they usually end up that way because of one or more of the following reasons:6

A need to express anger or gain control

Bullying may happen as a result of the inability of the child to express anger about something that’s happening in his or her life.

When a child (or even an adult) feels that some aspect of his or her life is out of control, a common response is to compensate by seeking to control the lives of others.

Low self-esteem

Bullies, especially social bullies who gossip, name-call, and say mean things about others, most often do so to either become more popular or maintain their popularity status by attempting to impress their peers.

Lack of empathy and compassion

In an article titled, “Machiavellian Kids,” published by Parent Science, a number of research studies were highlighted that showed that bullies consistently score low on empathic reactivity tests and are “woefully deficient” in their ability to experience moral compassion. This moral disengagement was often the result of blaming or dehumanizing the victim, displacing responsibility (“He made me do it.”), euphemistic labeling (“It was all in good fun.”), or exoneration by comparison (“What I did wasn’t as bad as what others did.”).7 A study from the University of Chicago, of teenagers with aggressive behavior issues, showed that the areas of the brain linked with feeling rewarded were very active when the teens viewed a video of someone inflicting pain on another person. This suggests that some bullies may actually take pleasure in causing someone else pain. At the same time, the parts of the brain involved in self-regulating emotion were inactive during those moments.8 CONTINUED

Home environment and/or parenting style Perhaps the largest influencing factor that will determine whether or not a child becomes a bully is the quality of the home environment. Bullying is a learned behavior, but the good news is that it can be unlearned. Children are far more likely to become bullies if they are bullied by either a parent or sibling, or receive harsh physical punishment at home. In an attempt to find relief from feelings of helplessness, and to empower themselves, they bully others. Teachers and coaches can be bullies, too. Researchers from Brunel University in Britain followed over 1,100 teenagers from 14 different schools and found that, in most cases, bullies come from a very specific kind of household, where there is very little to no warmth or emotional expression. They also tend to come from homes without two biological parents, where they are being raised by stepparents, single parents, foster parents, or other family members such as grandparents. In the vast majority of these cases, researchers said the children’s behavior arose out of a lack of attention, supervision, discipline, limits, and boundaries.9

ATTACK STRATEGY

In recent years, bullying has been identified as a significant problem for school children, at least by the media. While this is a good thing, it can lead some parents to overreact if their child happens to come home with a story of how a classmate treated them unkindly. In these situations, it’s important to understand the difference between teasing and bullying. If a boy in first grade teases a female classmate for wearing a particular dress, that’s not bullying. Even teasing a classmate because he or she wears glasses isn’t bullying. Luckily, much can be done in these kinds of situations by observant teachers who are willing to intervene and demand that the students respect each other. Bullying, however, involves a clear imbalance of power where repeated behavior is engaged in with the specific intention to control, humiliate, or instill fear in another person for the benefit of the perpetrator.

With this in mind, male and female bullies tend to opt for different attack strategies. In general, boys use physical intimidation, like tripping a victim in the hallway, pushing him into the lockers, or convincing buddies to gang up on him during certain sports activities in gym class. Threats of physical violence and actual violence are used by the male bully to get what he wants.

While some girls also opt for physical intimidation, most girl bullies hunt in packs and engage in actions that isolate their victims from school society, making them the odd girl out. Tactics can include name-calling, insults, and incessant rumors designed to ruin the victim’s reputation. Whereas boys intimidate each other faceto-face, girls will make many of their attacks behind their victims’ backs. Exclusion from the in-group is very common for female bullies, as they shun their victims and convince their friends follow suit. Even if they have no grievance against the victim, the friends will go along with the bully for fear of being cast out from the group themselves. Although it affects both sexes, girls tend to favor cyberbullying more than boys because of the social nature of the internet. Mean and false emails, instant message insults, and digitally-altered, unflattering images of the victim can be sent to hundreds of students, as well as to the victim herself, with the push of a button.

24

“While some girls also opt for physical intimidation, most girl bullies hunt in packs and engage in actions that isolate their victims from school society, making them the odd girl out. Tactics can include name-calling, insults, and incessant rumors designed to ruin the victim’s reputation.”

YOUR CHILD IS THE VICTIM

The embarrassment that comes with being bullied, especially for boys, along with the fear of retribution from the bullies if they tell an adult about what’s happening, is usually what keeps children suffering in silence. Signs that a child is being bullied include a sudden loss of enjoyment in school or a desire not go to school. A child might fake illness so he or she can stay home, or suddenly become withdrawn or unusually irritable. Any change in a child’s grades and/or emotional disposition is always an indication that it’s time to ask questions.

If you discover your child is being bullied, keep your emotions in check. Don’t fall apart over your child’s safety or start calling the perpetrator a jerk. Your child has already been on his or her own emotional rollercoaster and now needs you to be a grounding force and the assurance that everything is going to be okay. Empathize with your child and acknowledge him for having the courage to seek your support. Draw out as many details as possible by establishing trust and asking your child how these experiences made him or her feel.

Ask your child what he or she might think would work to solve the situation. This can empower children, and help them see they have choices. Discuss when it’s important to walk away from a confrontation, as well as what to say and when, remembering that it’s hard to face a tormentor. It’s also important to discuss when and how to stand up for oneself in different ways.

In the meantime, it’s important that your child not allow himself to be isolated. Bullies are far less likely to target a victim if he or she is in the company of two or more friends. If lunch money is being stolen, consider packing a lunch instead. If cyberbullying is an issue, consider changing your child’s email accounts and cell phone numbers, as well as deleting their social media pages on Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, etc. Find as many ways as you can to make your child unavailable to the bully while you pursue other actions.

Talk to your school principal and any teachers involved.

Ask about the school policy on bullying and how you can expect it to be enforced in your child’s case. Hold the school to their word, and if the problem persists, contact the school district superintendent. Document all conversations with school officials, and put as much of the correspondence in writing as possible.

After phone conversations, always send a letter or email thanking any school officials who helped you for their time, while recapping what was discussed on the phone for your records. If the school fails to act, you might also contact the parents of the bully, if you are able. When you speak with the parents of the bully, do not attack their child, but remain calm while discussing how the situation is making your child feel. Keep the focus on your child to avoid a defensive reaction from the bully’s parents. Harsh accusations about their child’s behavior will be met with resistance because their child’s behavior will be seen as a direct reflection on their parenting style.

At any point along this journey, if the threat of physical violence or actual violence is used against your child, the police should be notified if you feel your child is in serious danger.

“Understand the reasons why children becomes bullies, and be willing to ask yourself the tough questions about what may or may not be happening in your home that could have given rise to your child’s behavior.”

YOUR CHILD IS THE BULLY

No one wants a phone call telling them that their child is terrorizing a classmate at school. If you happen to get this phone call either from the school or the victim’s parents, remain calm! The worst thing you can do is shut out the other parent because you think they’re attacking your capability as a parent and the integrity of your child.

As the parent of the bully, you have far more power than anyone else, even the school, to remedy the situation.

Listen to what the school and the other parents have to say, as well as your child’s side of the story. Understand the reasons why children becomes bullies, and be willing to ask yourself the tough questions about what may or may not be happening in your home that could have given rise to your child’s behavior. This may well lead both of you on an important healing journey. Start the conversation with your child about self-esteem, the need to fit in, peer pressure and how to handle certain situations properly. Be sure your child understands the harm their behavior has caused, particularly the potential psychological and emotional damage their bullying has caused, that may well last beyond their school time together.

Above all, teach empathy. Ask your child how they would feel if they were bullied in the same way. Talk about how your child might apologize to the victim and make amends for the harm they have done. Teach him or her that we must take responsibility for our actions and experience the consequences of the choices we make. Take your child to volunteer at children’s wards in hospitals, nursing homes, or homeless shelters to cultivate a sense of compassion and empathy for those who are less fortunate, weak, or suffering. It’s a good idea to do this even if your child isn’t a bully; it will go a long way toward preventing him or her from becoming one. Role play with your child in the part of the victim, and encourage them to act out how they will react in future scenarios with children who are weaker or different from them. Eliminate all violent TV and video games for your child, in order to avoid emotional desensitization.

It’s essential that you make your expectations clear to your child, and that there will be consequences if the bullying continues. If your child fails to comply, always, always, always follow through with your corrective action.

Consistency is key, and bullies need boundaries. Be sure

25

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

to praise your child for acts of compassion, and most of all, show compassion and love to your child because they learn best by example. If these interventions fail to help the situation, seek out professional help for your child, as a psychological or medical issue may be at the root of his or her behavior.

spiritual or religious practice at least once per week reported seeing greater and more frequent expressions of love between their parents.14 The evidence is in: the best way to end the bullying problem is to stop raising bullies, and we can do that by spending more time with our children. Yes, we’re all busy, but is there a more important priority than our children? Do we want to be the primary influence that shapes who they will become, or will we leave that responsibility to their peers, the internet, TV, and video games? It’s the decisions we make right now that will determine how our children interact with others at school and in the world as adults. The choice is ours, and it’s only a matter of time.

SOURCES (1) Callegary, Ellen. (December, 27 2011). Despite the law, too many schools fail to take bullying seriously. The Baltimore Sun. http://articles.baltimoresun.com/2011-12-27/news/bsed-bullying-20111227_1_shawna-sullivan-fight-between-twostudents-maryland-schools.

(2) Cohn, Andrea, Canter, Andrea, “Bullying: facts for schools and parents”, NASP Fact Sheet (2014), http://www. nasponline.org/resources/factsheets/bullying_fs.aspx.

(3) The National Education Association, “Nation’s educators continue push for safe bully-free environments”, (October 8, 2012), http://www.nea.org/home/53298.htm.

(4) Cohn, Andrea, Canter, Andrea, “Bullying: facts for schools and parents”, NASP Fact Sheet (2014), http://www. nasponline.org/resources/factsheets/bullying_fs.aspx.

TIME TESTED, FAMILY APPROVED Raising children is difficult, and we’re all wondering if we’re making the right choices that will serve them well in adulthood. Regardless of the challenges they face from bullying, drugs, sex, alcohol, or something else, there is one rule that if consistently followed, will do far more than anything else to help our children make the right decisions when we can’t be there—we must spend time with them. The more time we spend, the deeper the connection will be, and the more trust we’ll establish. This goes for any relationship, including the ones we have with our kids, especially if we expect them to confide in us when they’re struggling.

Research consistently shows that regularly spending time with your children engaged in low/no cost activities like playing board games, gardening, or taking a bike ride together, strengthens family cohesion and results in greater emotional bonding.10 Teens who ate dinner with their families at least five nights per week were three times less likely to abuse prescription drugs, use illegal drugs, smoke cigarettes, or drink alcohol, and got better grades.11 Adolescents who spent regular quality time with their parents exhibited fewer behavioral problems,12 and those who reported a “better than average” relationship with their resident parents or single parent were 18% and 17% less likely to engage in acts of violence.13 At the same time, children from families that followed a

26

(5) “Talking with Kids About Tough Issues”: A national survey of parents and kids, Questionnaire and Detailed Results, The Kaiser Family Foundation, (2001), http://www.talkwithkids. org/nickelodeon/details.pdf.

(6) Pulido, Mary, “My Child is the Bully: Tips for parents”, The Huffington Post, (June 19, 2012), http://www.huffingtonpost. com/mary-l-pulido-phd/bullying_b_1435791.html.

(7) Dewar, Gwen. (2013). Machiavellian kids? Bullies, empathy, and moral reasoning. Parent Science, http://www. parentingscience.com/bullies-and-moral-reasoning.html.

(8) Steenhuysen, Julie. (November 7, 2008). Bullies may get kick out of seeing others in pain. Reuters, http://www.reuters. com/article/us-brain-bullies-idUSTRE4A616020081107.

(9) Rettner, Rachael. (August 27, 2010). Bullies on bullying: why we do it. LiveScience., http://www.livescience.com/11163bullies-bullying.html.

(10) Zabriski, Ramone. McCormick, Brian. (2001). The influences of family leisure patterns on perceptions of family functioning. Family Relations. 50(3), 281-289.

(11) The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University, “The Importance of Family Dinners II”, (2005).

(12) Pearce, Michael. (2003). The protective effects of religiousness and parent involvement on the development of conduct problems among youth exposed to violence.

Child Development. 74(6), 1682-1696.

(13) Knoester, Chris. Haynie, Dana. (2005). Community context, social integration into family, and youth violence.

Journal of Marriage and Family. 67(3), 767-780.

(14) Smith, Christian. Phillip, Kim. (2003). Family religious involvement and the quality of parental relationships for families with early adolescents. Research Report of the National Study of Youth and Religion 5. 1-23.

A SLIP OF THE TONGUE Releasing lip and tongue ties resolves serious childhood health problems

BY DR. SHERRY SAMI

mother brought her 7-month-old baby in to see me recently because he was experiencing a number of serious, but unexplained problems. The biggest concern was that he wasn’t gaining weight. Much of that had to do with the fact that he’d lost interest in breastfeeding. When he did feed, his sessions were long and labored until he became exhausted and finally gave up. In addition, he was experiencing constant reflux and irregular bowel movements. Naturally, the alternating hunger and constipation left him irritable, and his mother overwhelmed much of the time.

Unfortunately, it’s relatively common that I see parents who are experiencing these mysterious symptoms with their young children.

These parents have often seen more than ten or fifteen doctors before coming to me. The most incredible part is that many of the doctors they’ve seen have told them these problems are normal and that they’ll eventually iron themselves out, but they don’t.

As complex as the situation appeared, I was confident there was a simple solution. When I reached up to pull the baby’s upper lip away from his gums, it showed very little forward movement. Turning the lip over, I could clearly see that the baby had a very short and rigid frenulum, the band of tissue that attaches the lips to the gums, that was preventing him from having full mobility of his mouth. In fact, the frenulum was so short that it pulled on the upper lip in an unnatural way and prevented the baby from smiling properly, leaving him with a slightly frowning appearance.

I noticed that he had a short frenulum behind his lower lip, as well, which in most cases contributes more heavily to the symptoms of reflux and spitting up. Through a total body examination, I could tell the child had suffered from a very traumatic birth and the aftereffects of such an experience. After consulting an osteopathic physician, I knew that the solution to these complex problems would be much easier than anything this poor child and his frustrated mother had been through thus far.

Releasing the upper and lower frenulae in two separate procedures (known as a frenectomy), done one week apart, would free up the baby’s mouth and allow for a proper mouth seal around the nipple and effortless feeding. This would also eliminate the air that got

into the baby’s stomach as a result of its gulping and gasping, and solve the reflux, gas, and irritability issues. At the same time, his new rhythmic suckling pattern would coordinate his intestinal peristalsis, allowing him to have regular bowel movements. Because he would be eating more and keeping down every ounce of milk he consumed, he would return to a normal weight very quickly.

Naturally, the mother was thrilled at this news. The sad part is that most parents, and even pediatric dentists, don’t understand how something as simple as a short lip or tongue frenulum can cause so many problems in childhood and how this issue, if not identified early, can lead to serious and permanent complications in adulthood.

INCOMPLETE SEPARATION It’s important to note that while frenulum is a formal medical description, other physicians may use the terms lip tie, tongue tie, tethered tongue, tethered lip, frenulae (plural) or frenum (an informal abbreviation), to describe the same condition. There are actually seven frenulae in the mouth, with the most prominent being inside the upper and lower lips, and beneath the tongue. Around the 7th week of gestation, a baby’s lips and gum tissue begin to separate from each other and become distinct structures. Small interruptions in this process result in remnants of tissue being formed that tack the lips and tongue to the substructure of the mouth, providing stability without undue restriction.

Sometimes, the separation process between the lips and gums doesn’t quite reach completion, leaving too much tissue behind as an anchor. This leaves a child with a tongue and lips that are tethered too tightly to the substructures of the mouth, resulting in severely limited mobility. As a result, the baby is unable to properly latch on to the breast, leading to the inability to feed, as well as digestive and irritability issues. Because the baby will try any method to get its mouth around the nipple to feed, sessions can often be quite painful for the mother.

When babies are unable to breastfeed, an unfortunate but quick fix, suggested by some doctors, is bottle feeding. Depending on the design, bottles don’t often require babies to open their mouths as

27

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

wide as they normally would during breastfeeding. As a result, many babies with short tongue and lip ties can feed from a bottle, while their frenulum issues go undetected for years, leading to serious complications later in life.

Naturally, frustrated mothers tend to opt for bottle feeding because it seems to solve (at least temporarily) their baby’s problems, but without the proper intervention and myofunctional treatment, the compensating habits of the child’s mouth, tongue, head, and neck only get progressively worse. In fact, by the time the re-education effort about the overwhelming benefits of breastfeeding began in the 1980s, several generations of bottle-fed babies had grown up with their frenulum issues undetected, leaving them to suffer with many chronic, unexplained problems in adulthood.

While a baby’s inability to breastfeed is one of the hallmarks of a frenulum problem, it shouldn’t be viewed as the definitive symptom.

In cases where the mother happens to produce an abundance of milk, a child with an undetected short frenulum may still be able to breastfeed and thrive, even with a shallow breast latch. In such cases, babies will still experience symptoms such as regurgitation, reflux and bowel problems because they’re feeding from the mother in the same way they would from a bottle and engaging 45 or more unnecessary muscles to compensate during the process. So, it’s always wise to consider a baby’s whole experience rather than simply looking for one or two signs of a frenulum problem.

QUICK FIX CONSEQUENCES Everything in the human body is connected. Like the interconnected parts of a synchronized machine, one element cannot be moved or altered without also creating a chain reaction of secondary changes throughout the rest of the mechanism. If the tongue is tethered too tightly, it’s restricted to the bottom of the mouth. When the tongue can move freely, its natural resting place is on the roof of the mouth behind the front teeth, with the lips closed. As the oral cavity grows, it uses the tongue at the roof of the mouth as a template around which all the upper teeth will erupt in order and perfectly straight.

The lower jaw responds by following the teeth alignment of the upper jaw, creating a beautiful matching bite.

If the tongue cannot reach its normal resting place at the roof of the mouth because of a tight frenulum, the skull will develop a narrow upper palate as it grows, around which there won’t be enough room to accommodate all the child’s teeth. As a result, the teeth will end up crooked and overlapping as they randomly erupt and fight for space.

With no proper template to follow from the upper jaw, the teeth in the lower jaw will emerge in an equally erratic fashion leading to a recessed jaw or “weak chin” and misaligned bite or malocclusion.

In the case of crooked teeth, braces are the most common solution offered by orthodontists that never seem to question that teeth don’t grow crookedly for no reason. The body is programmed for beautifully straight teeth. When they grow in crooked, that’s the effect of a deeper cause, which most often turns out to be a tight frenulum. To force a child’s teeth into an unnatural position with braces, while the rest of the oral cavity and skull have developed in a completely opposite direction, is to create unnecessary tension within the cranium that can lead to migraines, TMJ disorder and other problems later in life.

In adulthood, most people who grew up with undetected frenulae problems find that their earlier orthodontics interventions fail, resulting in continuous dental work and life-long use of a retainer.

As the child’s upper palate collapses inward, the central and mid-facial development follows suit, as the cheekbones sag in and downward, creating an unnaturally elongated face that will permanently change the child’s appearance, if not detected. Under normal circumstances, a child’s oral cavity, jaws and facial structure develop in a forward fashion. If the cranium experiences resistance from rigid frenulae as it attempts to grow forward, it will compensate by shifting that growth in a backward and downward direction. Instead of creating expansion in the child’s face, jaws, oral cavity, throat, and

28

“If the tongue cannot reach its normal resting place at the roof of the mouth because of a tight frenulum, the skull will develop a narrow upper palate as it grows, around which there won’t be enough room to accommodate all the child’s teeth.” airway, it does the exact opposite.

Children with tight frenulae suffer from smaller sinus cavities and narrower airways, which leave them with chronic sinus problems and breathing difficulties. In a completely unconscious reflex to get more breath into their bodies, these children often jut their heads forward in an attempt to create a wider airway, nearly always breathing through their mouths. This is because their nasal passages have developed too narrowly, as well. Tongue thrust is often a telltale sign of a narrow airway and a tight frenulum. Naturally, the inability to breath properly results in subtle anxiety in the child, which affects his or her behavior in ways that are often misdiagnosed as ADHD and treated with unnecessary medication. Not getting enough air, even to a slight degree, triggers the autonomic nervous system and the fight-or-flight mechanism that further affects breathing, emotions, and even gut health. Darick Nordstrom, DDS, osteopathic oral appliance developer, explains how this phenomenon happens.

“We all know the feeling of butterflies in our stomach, but for those with tethered oral tissues, that feeling can be generated mechanically by tongue movement, and can lead to confusing social cues, and out-of-context self-doubt, as the brain attempts to process the additional sensory input. Fortunately, research into lower primate social interactions has expanded our understanding of the extensive influence of this additional proprioceptive sensory input.”

Because the tongue does not have full mobility, the child isn’t able to exercise it fully and so experiences atrophy in the tongue muscles. This results in a loss of coordination that leads to swallowing problems, and even sleep apnea.

These mouth breathers, as they’re called, always have their mouths open, even when they’re not eating or speaking. For children without frenulae issues, breathing is done through the nose alone with lips sealed and the tongue at the roof of the mouth. Of course, when the

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

head is thrust forward in an unnatural position to breathe through the mouth, it throws the rest of the body out of alignment, creating additional problems for the head, neck, spine, posture, hips, and even gait.

ESSENTIAL EARLY INTERVENTION All babies should have their first dentist visit by or before 6 months.

Although there are no teeth to examine at that age, a knowledgeable pediatric dentist or orthodontist can check for rigid or short frenulae, tongue mobility and mouth flexibility. If a baby shows any signs of consistent difficulty in breastfeeding or swallowing, inability to gain weight, reflux, vomiting or spitting up, gas, irritability or colic, bowel irregularity or tongue thrust, he should be examined by a professional as soon as possible.

Research has shown that what’s known as the MTHFR gene has been associated with short frenulae, so it’s important to check a baby as close to birth as possible, and certainly if either parent has a history of lip or tongue tie problems. The earlier an intervention is made, the less compensation a baby will make in the use of its body, and the faster its recovery will be. Dr. Nordstrom emphasizes that missing frenulae problems was far less common in decades past, when oral examinations were part of the standard birthing process.

“For millennia, experienced midwives and doctors have routinely inspected the newborn for these restrictions, and quickly released them to facilitate a natural, productive, comfortable, and satisfying breast-feeding experience.

There was a lapse in this knowledge and practice when western civilization experimented with bottle feeding.”

a thin, sliding and integrating muscle sheath, behaves sluggishly, and proprioceptively creates negative feedback to the musculature… One cause of this growing problem is the reduction in outdoor activity and natural sunlight, as vitamin D3 has a very substantial influence on the methylation pathways so important in the maturation of connective tissue (including fascia), and healthy activity facilitates connective tissue formation and orientation (even in the developing fetus).”

A child’s oral cavity and mid-facial skeletal structure stop growing and reach their permanent formation around age 11. This is why it’s extremely important to identify a frenulum problem as early as possible. When we can take advantage of the child’s rapid growth rate while still very young, his or her craniofacial growth pattern can be completely reversed back to normal. In many cases, this means that braces for crooked teeth aren’t even necessary, as teeth naturally realign as the face expands forward and outward, sometimes with the help of temporary oral appliances.

FRENECTOMY FUNDAMENTALS If a frenectomy is necessary, the frenulae in question are numbed while a laser (sometimes a scalpel) quickly severs the tissue, vaporizing it on contact. Nanoparticle silver, ozonated water or olive oil is then applied to minimize inflammation and prevent infection.

Although there is very little blood involved in a frenectomy, a laser simultaneously cauterizes the site, rendering the procedure virtually bloodless. When releasing the frenulae, Dr. Nordstrom recommends a surgical approach that patterns itself after the body’s natural processes to minimize tissue trauma and prevent scarring.

“Mouth breathers always have their mouths open, even when they’re not eating or speaking. For children without frenulae issues, breathing is done through the nose alone with lips sealed and the tongue at the roof of the mouth.”

“It is desirable for a healthy release to mimic the natural biological process that failed to complete. For example, nature dictates that the surgeon absolutely avoids attempting to release by cutting across a frenulum…

In the case of dense fascial tethering, the release is conducted on the fascia (as a dissection) through a smaller opening in the mucosa to avoid the rapid bridging, scarring potential of the denser connective tissue.”

It should be noted that family doctors and pediatricians often miss frenulae problems altogether or underplay the seriousness of the issue. I had one patient who told me that while her child’s pediatrician did diagnose a tight upper lip frenulum, he suggested no treatment. Brushing it off he said, “Don’t worry about it. He’s going to fall, hit his mouth on something and rupture it anyway.”

It’s also very common for regular pediatricians to miss problems with the secondary or posterior frenulum beneath the tongue at the base, which is much more difficult to isolate and examine than the anterior frenulum at the front that’s immediately visible when the tongue is lifted. Although equally important to mouth mobility, Dr. Nordstrom believes that the term posterior tongue tie or posterior tongue frenulum is a mislabel that can cause confusion for both doctors and parents.

Immediately after the procedure, most babies are able to breastfeed properly.

The difference is often dramatic, as their natural instincts kicks in. Some babies, however, do require 2-3 weeks to fully coordinate the new freedom they experience in their tongue and lips. During this time, it’s extremely important to work together with a certified lactation consultant, osteopathic ph ysician, and your pediatric dentist/orthodontist to support the baby and ensure the best possible results.

“This restriction, although not a frenulum or rope-like tether, can also have similar debilitating effects, and is deserving of proper diagnosis and treatment. It appears to be a form of connective tissue error (similar to laxity, Ehlers Danlos, etc.), and arises from inadequately differentiated or matured fascia that, instead of acting as

Others however, may require more extensive intervention, particularly if they’ve exhibited a significant lack of tone in the tongue and mouth (hypertonia) prior to the surgery. These children often can’t even accept bottles or pacifiers. For babies with this advanced condition, standard treatment may not be adequate, with

29

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

“If a baby shows any signs of consistent difficulty in breastfeeding or swallowing, inability to gain weight, reflux, vomiting or spitting up, gas, irritability or colic, bowel irregularity or tongue thrust, he should be examined by a professional as soon as possible.” more ongoing care required, as well as intra-oral manipulation to maintain the release during healing. Interaction with the osteopath and lactation consultant before and during the release should be mandatory in cases like torticollis, CP, asymmetrical function, or perinatal or childhood trauma. In the case where more than one frenulum needs to be released, Katherine Gill MD, recommends performing them in separate procedures.

osteopathic approach is essential for a truly successful outcome. It’s not just a matter of snipping a frenulum and then sending a child home until his next checkup. When new patients tell me their child’s frenectomy didn’t solve their related issues, I know before I even ask them, that either there wasn’t enough release in the frenulum, or they did not take an osteopathic approach toward healing. Dr. Gill naturally agrees.

“In my experience, it is better for the patient to have a delay between lip and tongue frenectomy, at least one week for infants and possibly longer for adults… This gives the body time to reorganize structural elements throughout the entire system that were reacting to the fulcrum provided by the excessive tethering.”

“In the case of a frenectomy, the whole patient is treated because the whole body is affected… After treating hundreds of newborns with these issues, it has become clearer how to diagnose the whole body effects of tight frenulae in adults. The most important benefit of osteopathic treatment before and after frenectomy is that a disorganized human system becomes coordinated and then receptive to the interventions of myofunctional therapy and dental orthopedics.

In this case, there is much better success in developing tongue function, positioning, and control. If the tongue functions normally, most of these other problems will not occur.”

Parents are also given specific oral stretching exercises to do with their baby or child several times per day for 3-4 weeks after the surgery. This is to ensure that the frenulae do not re-attach, creating the same problem again. Both before and after the procedure, I conduct an osteopathic, comprehensive, whole body examination with an emphasis on the head, neck, back, and hips to provide additional interventions that ensure a return to balance for all body systems that might have been affected.

OSTEOPATHIC ADVANTAGE Although the solution seems like a simple one (and in some ways it is), the compensating habits, swallowing difficulties, body misalignments, speech issues, and other problems acquired as a result of a rigid frenulum will take time to reverse. This is why an

I can’t express the joy I feel when I see a child thriving and off as many as five medications just weeks after a frenectomy and osteopathic intervention. Watching these children come alive is one of the most dramatic experiences I’ve had the blessing to witness.

Equally rewarding is seeing how the relationships between these children and their mothers improve because they can finally bond in the way that nature intended. In this way, a frenectomy is a small procedure that provides great gifts for both mother and child for years to come.

DR. SHERRY SAMI A graduate of Columbia University, she completed her residency in pediatric dentistry and orthodontics at the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA) Medical Center. She later served as a clinical instructor at UCLA, as part of both the pre-med and dentistry programs. It was during this time that she became one of the creators of the Children Health Advocacy Training (CHAT) curriculum. Collaborating with pediatricians and dentistry specialists, Dr. Sami designed one of the first integrative residency training programs that incorporated western medical practices with other intuitive, holistic interventions.

Her practice is based on “total body wellness”, a philosophy that recognizes the synergistic connection our emotions play in our physical condition. It also emphasizes the correlation of a healthy mouth, jaw and airways with a vibrant, energetic body. Subtle changes in these areas can be the catalyst for neck, back and hip problems that are often misdiagnosed as the child grows. Early oral examinations can reveal problems with internal organs, such as the liver or kidneys, which present symptoms on the tongue. Dr. Sami’s integrative approach also includes airway evaluation and alignment that often provide dramatic results for the symptoms of ADHD, teeth grinding, bedwetting, mouth breathing and challenging behavioral habits.

30

ith all the amazing things modern medicine has to offer, it doesn’t have a great track record when it comes to healing chronic disease. Just try thinking of any disease that’s been cured in the last 50 years and you’ll see what I mean. We’ve been stuck in a struggle to eradicate the same diseases that have affected many generations before us, including our own aging parents, with little progress, regardless of how much money we put into research. As a result, medicine has fallen into the pattern of managing symptoms, mostly with pharmaceuticals, rather than eliminating illness.

I believe that part of this stagnation comes from modern medicine’s tendency to mistake the mechanisms of disease for the origin of disease. In

32

this situation, when we rush to medicate or operate, not only are we shooting at the wrong target, but our efforts often make matters worse by predisposing patients to other diseases in the future because of the permanent changes our current medical interventions make to their physiological terrain. I see this phenomenon happening quite often with the disease we’ve probably been struggling with the longest cancer.

Even if patients have the same disease it doesn’t mean they should be treated the same way, because each person’s biological terrain is different.

UNCONSCIOUS EXPOSURE Simple choices we’re making that increase our cancer risk B Y

D R .

H A B I B

S A D E G H I

Featured on:

All women have the same biological parts, as do men, but this doesn’t mean that all male and female patients should be treated the same way, even if they have the same disease, because each person’s biological terrain is different. Think of the body as a plot of land where we want to grow a beautiful garden. The success of our effort depends on a lot of variables.

What’s the quality of the soil like? Is it rich with minerals, or is it dry and rocky? If so, the seed we plant may not respond. Is the nitrogen level in the soil high or low? That will affect what we choose to plant. Are we planting seeds that will grow in the existing climate? What was the land used for before it came to us - green pasture or a trash dump? Will the landscaping we have planned affect the irrigation and

water runoff? The point is that every defining factor and decision made about this property in the past will affect how it performs for us today. We must fully understand its present condition and how it functions if we are to make changes that will rebalance the terrain and not cause further disruption.

It also helps to think of the body as a flowing river consisting of tens of thousands of interconnected moving parts and processes. Whatever is introduced to the body upstream in our youth, whether it’s a surgery, drug habit, smoking, sports injury or something else, will intrude upon and change the functional terrain of the body, with its effects being felt downstream later in life. Too often, medicine mistakes the downstream effects in the body, the

Probably the most common way we’re altering the terrain of our bodies and exposing ourselves to disease downstream is by taking far too many unnecessary antibiotics.

33

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

symptoms of the disease, as the cause of disease, never realizing that what they’re looking for is much farther upstream in the body, and that it most likely occurred long ago in the past.

Probably the most common way we’re altering the terrain of our bodies and exposing ourselves to disease downstream is by taking far too many unnecessary antibiotics. It’s well-known by now that the proliferation of unnecessary antibiotic use by millions of Americans has contributed to the mutation of antibiotic resistant superbugs. Even worse is how all those antibiotics are severely altering the physical terrain of the gut. Antibiotics were designed to kill any and all micro-organisms without exception.

Therefore, they cannot distinguish between microbes that are beneficial to us and those that are harmful.

The danger of taking antibiotics is that along with killing the pathogenic microbes that are making us sick, they simultaneously destroy millions of colonies of beneficial bacteria in our intestines that form the larger part of our immune system. When our good bacteria fall below a certain percentage, they can’t keep the bad bacteria and pathogens at bay anymore, which mean they proliferate unchecked leading to diseases of all kinds. I’ve had patients who’d been on antibiotics every other month for years until they ended up with Crohn’s disease or colon cancer. Their stool samples always showed hardly any good bacteria at all. Their guts were nearly sterile.

While no cause-effect relationship has been established between antibiotics and cancer, many epidemiological studies have shown a strong correlation between the two. A six-year study in Finland monitored more than 3 million people between the ages of 30 and 79 who had no history of cancer. Over the course of the study, researchers found that risk for prostate, breast, lung, endocrine, and colon cancer increased with antibiotic use. Those who had 0-1 antibiotic prescriptions during the designated period experienced no increase. Those with 2-5 saw a 27% increase, while more than 6 prescriptions during the time period resulted in a 37% increase in cancer risk. The participants with more than 6 prescriptions were also 1.5 times more likely to be diagnosed with less common cancers, such as non-melanoma skin, duodenum, pancreas, kidney, bladder, male genital, and thyroid cancers, as well as myeloma and leukemia.1 A study by the National Cancer Institute that followed 10,000 women over 17 years found that those who took antibiotics for more than 500 cumulative days (greater than 25 prescriptions) doubled their risk for breast cancer. More surprising, women who took anywhere between 1 and 25 prescriptions saw their risk for breast cancer increase an average of 1.5 times over those who took none.2 Of course, it doesn’t matter why antibiotics are prescribed or whether they’re actually needed. They all have the same negative impact on the body’s terrain.

One of the most common and frequent reasons

34

women are prescribed antibiotics is for urinary tract infections. Research shows that the risk of breast cancer increases more than 70% for premenopausal women (under age 50) who have taken multiple rounds of antibiotics for urinary tract infections in the past. After a follow up of more than ten years, the breast cancer risk for women in the study had nearly doubled.3 In the past, acne was another popular reason antibiotics were prescribed. Now, research shows that men who took the antibiotic tetracycline for four or more years for their acne had a significantly higher rate of prostate cancer later in life.4 Antibiotics are invaluable when an illness is serious or life-threatening, but the amount of information linking the casual use of antibiotics with increased cancer risk is substantial. As the evidence grows, the CDC no longer recommends antibiotics for most ear infections in children,5 while the American Academy of Pediatrics has issued much stricter watch-and-wait guidelines.6 The best way to avoid altering the terrain of your body with antibiotics and increasing cancer risk is to boost your own immunity so you don’t get sick in the first place. You can do that by getting all the processed food out of your diet and eating whole foods full of vitamins and antioxidants. Reduce your consumption of grain products. Grains contain proteins like lectin and gluten that damage the intestinal lining and cause inflammation. Reduce starchy foods and sugar. Pathogenic bacteria in the intestines thrive on sugar and starch. Eat fermented foods such as sauerkraut, kimchi, yogurt, kefir and kombucha tea to boost your population of good intestinal bacteria. Consider supplementing with herbal immune boosters like Echinacea, oil of oregano, coconut oil and garlic, which all have strong antimicrobial properties.

Another way we alter the terrain of our bodies earlier in life, and expose ourselves to cancer much later downstream, is through the overuse of overthe-counter (OTC) drugs. Just because these items are available without a prescription doesn’t mean they’re harmless, even at recommended doses. Hardly anyone reads the inserts or side effects information of these products. Not long ago, lots of doctors were prescribing an aspirin a day as a way for patients to prevent heart attack and stroke, but even the innocuous aspirin has a host of nasty side effects when taken over time, including gastrointestinal bleeding.7 Now doctors aren’t so eager to prescribe this seemingly benign intervention. Other OTC pain killers can have a similar effect.8 An elderly patient of mine had blood in her urine. It turned out that she was taking ibuprofen regularly for knee pain.

After stopping the medication and using a different treatment for her pain, her urine was almost clear of blood after 30 days. After 60 days, it was completely gone.

If there’s one category of OTC drug that’s used more than pain relievers, it’s antihistamines. Allergy symptoms can run the gamut from mild to severe,

Another way we alter the terrain of our bodies earlier in life, and expose ourselves to cancer much later downstream, is through the overuse of over-thecounter (OTC) drugs.

Antihistamines work by attaching to H1 receptors on cells, preventing the body from producing its own histamine. In essence, it turns off the immune system alarm, not just to the allergen, but to other invaders in the body, as well.

EACH PATIENT’S INTERNAL TERRAIN IS LIKE A FINGERPRINT, THAT PROVIDES THE CLUES TO CREATING A REAL PERSONALIZED TREATMENT THAT PATIENTS RESPOND TO. and some people can suffer frequently through three seasons of the year, depending on where they live. So it’s easy to understand why they reach for antihistamine relief during an allergy attack, but doing so frequently could increase their risk of cancer later in life.

Histamine has several important roles in the body including regulating function in the gut for proper digestion, acting as a neurotransmitter to carry messages from one nerve to another, and being a component of stomach acid that helps us break down food. It’s also an immune system modulator. When an allergen enters the body, histamine is secreted by basophils and mast cells in the surrounding connective tissue. It’s histamine’s job to sound the alarm that brings white blood cells to the area to eradicate the invader. It does this by creating an immediate inflammatory response. Histamine causes blood vessels to dilate so the white blood cells can locate and attack the infection or invader fast. It’s the buildup of histamine in the body that causes all the familiar miserable symptoms, even though this is a normal part of the body’s natural immune response.

Antihistamines work by attaching to H1 receptors on cells, preventing the body from producing its own histamine. In essence, it turns off the immune system alarm, not just to the allergen, but to other invaders in the body, as well. Research has shown mice that were unable to produce or lacked histamine had an increase in the susceptibility to colon and skin cancers, as well as increased frequency in tumor formation.9 Links have also been discovered between long-term antihistamine use and certain brain tumors.10 A Canadian research team working with the National Cancer Institute knew that a chemical compound called DPPE—a chemical cousin to the anti-cancer drug Tamoxifen that was found to actually cause cancer11—latched onto H1 cell receptors causing malignant cells to grow faster. Since antihistamines are similar in composition to DPPE and attach to the same receptors, researchers were curious as to whether these OTC drugs had the same effect. And indeed they did. Results showed that mice injected with cancer, that also received regular doses of antihistamines, saw their tumor growth significantly increase.12 Interestingly, just two years prior, the research team found the same cancer acceleration effect with several widely-used antidepressants in doses equivalent to those taken by humans.13 The lead researcher, Dr. Lorne J. Brandes, of the University of Manitoba stated:

“We believe it possible that chronic consumption of many prescription and nonprescription drugs with tumor-growth-promoting properties may represent a previously unrecognized, and therefore insidious, environmental risk factor for cancer growth.” 14 So while antihistamines don’t technically cause cancer, they do mute the signaling of the immune system, which is fighting off invaders, including cancer cells, in our bodies every day. They’ve also clearly been shown to accelerate the growth of cancer,

regardless of whether it’s known or undetected in the body.

Instead of always reaching for antihistamines through cold and allergy seasons, consider some natural remedies that don’t alter the terrain of the body. A teaspoon of apple cider vinegar or lemon juice in a glass of water three times a day can help reduce mucus production and cleanse the lymphatic system. Consider using a Neti pot with a homemade saline rinse to clear out the nasal passages and get yourself breathing again. Boosting beneficial gut bacteria with probiotics can sometimes reduce allergic incidents. A low glycemic diet and strengthening the gut lining with the GAPS diet will also help in this respect and reduce food sensitivities. While there hasn’t been a lot of research on it, there is impressive anecdotal evidence that consuming raw local honey from a beekeeper or farmer where you live, can work like a natural “allergy shot” and help your body adapt to the pollen from the plants and flowers in your geographical location.15

Most people don’t realize it, but we also unknowingly change the terrain of our bodies and expose ourselves to cancer risk by flying. The earth’s atmosphere protects us from cosmic radiation from gamma rays and X-rays, as well as from electromagnetic radiation from the sun. As altitude increases, the atmosphere gets progressively thinner, providing less protection. The atmosphere is also thickest at the equator and thins out at it moves toward the poles. So the major factors in radiation exposure when flying are frequency of flight, duration of the flight, altitude and latitude. Radiation exposure occurs on all flights, but the greatest exposure comes from international routes. At cruising altitudes of 39,000 feet there is virtually no protection from radiation since the plane’s fuselage doesn’t act as a barrier.

Radiation is a concern because it generates an immense amount of free radicals that damage the body at the cellular level, including DNA. This can set the stage for cellular mutation and cancer development. The body absorbs radiation and accumulates it over a lifetime. It’s measured in units called millisieverts (mSv), and there is no safe level.

While recommendations from agencies around the world vary, all agree that exposure should be kept as low as reasonably possible. At present, the International Commission on Radiological Protection (ICRP) recommends that people working with or around radiation not exceed 20 mSv per year, while the public should not exceed 5 mSv per year,16 but these allowances are based on observation, not longterm studies.

Research compiled in an official report for flight attendants by the Department of Air Safety, Health

The major factors in radiation exposure when flying are frequency of flight, duration of the flight, altitude and latitude.

When we understand the importance of preserving or restoring the terrain of the body, we can make choices today that support our health long into the future.

35

When we understand the importance of preserving or restoring the terrain of the body, we can make choices today that support our health long into the future. With this knowledge, we can also find the real cause of illness much sooner and support our bodies with effective treatments, rather than getting lost in years of symptom management. Every great journey requires an excellent roadmap, and the trip back to wellness can only be completed with a thorough understanding of each patient’s internal terrain. Like a fingerprint, it provides the clues to creating a real personalized treatment that patients respond to, not just by alleviating the symptoms of today, but by

36

preventing the diseases of tomorrow as well. If you are interested in finding an integrative/functional medicine physician in your area, please feel free to reach out to me via email at info@behiveofhealing. com, and I will be happy to send you a referral.

(1) Kikkinen, A et al. (2008). Antibiotic use predicts an increased risk of cancer. International Journal of Cancer. 123(9), 2152-2159. doi: 10.1002/ijc.23622.

(2) Velcier, Christine et al. (2004). Antibiotic use in relation to the risk of breast cancer. Journal of the American Medical Association.

291(7), 827-835. doi:10.1001/jama.291.7.827.

(3) Knekt, P et al. (2000). Does antibacterial treatment for urinary tract infection contribute to the risk of breast cancer? British Journal of Cancer, 1(82), 1107-1110: doi:10.1054/bjoc.1999.1047.

(4) Sutcliffe, Siobhan et al. (2007). Acne and risk of prostate cancer.

International Journal of Cancer, 12(12), 2688-2692, doi: 10.1002/ ijc.23032.

(5) Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Get Smart: Know when antibiotics work, Ear Infection, updated April 17, 2015, http://www.cdc.gov/getsmart/community/for-patients/commonillnesses/ear-infection.html.

(6) Lieberthal, A et al. (February, 2013). The diagnosis and management of acute otitis media. Clinical Practice Guideline, American Academy of Pediatrics, http://pediatrics.aappublications. org/content/pediatrics/early/2013/02/20/peds.2012-3488.full.pdf.

(7) Huang, Edward et al. (2011). Long term use of aspirin and the risk of gastrointestinal bleeding. American Journal of Medicine.

124(5), 426-433. doi: 10.1016/j.amjmed.2010.12.022.

(8) Ibuprofen Side Effects, Drugs.com, https://www.drugs.com/ sfx/ibuprofen-side-effects.html.

(9) Ruffell, Brian. Coussens, Lisa. (2011). Histamine restricts cancer: nothing to sneeze at. Nature Medicine. 17, 43-44. doi:10.1038/ nm0111-43.

(10) Scheurer, Michael et al. (2008). Long-term anti-inflammatory and antihistamine medication use and adult glioma risk. Cancer Epidemiology, Biomarkers & Prevention. 17(5), 1277-1281. doi: 10.1158/1055-9965.EPI-07-2621.

(11) Lavie, O et al. (2008). The risk of developing uterine sarcoma after tamoxifen use. International Journal of Gyecological Cancer.

18(2), 352-356. doi: 10.1111/j.1525-1438.2007.01025.x.

(12) Brandes, Lorne et al. (1994). Enhanced cancer growth in mice administered daily human-equivalent doses of some h1antihistamines: predictive in vitro correlates. Journal of the National Cancer Institute. 86(10), 770-775. doi: 10.1093/jnci/86.10.770 (13) Brandes, Lorne et al. (1992). Stimulation of malignant growth in rodents by antidepressant drugs at clinically relevant doses.

Cancer Research. 52(13), 3796-3800. http://cancerres.aacrjournals. org/content/52/13/3796.abstract.

(14) Fackelmann, Kathy, (1994). Do antihistamines spur cancer growth? Science News, https://www.thefreelibrary.com/ Do+antihistamines+spur+cancer+growth%3f-a015284941.

(15) Sisson, Mark, (January 23, 2012), Mark’s Daily Apple, Dear Mark: Raw Honey and Allergies, and Resveratrol Debunked? http://www.marksdailyapple.com/dear-mark-raw-honey-andallergies-and-resveratrol-debunked/#axzz2PWjiZxCm. (16) Cosmic and Solar Radiation: Facts for Flight Attendants, Association of Flight Attendants, Dept. of Air Safety, Health & Security, updated April 2010, http://ashsd.afacwa.org/docs/ RadBroch1.pdf.

(17) Ibid.

(18) Rafnsson, Vilhjalmur et al. (2000). Incidence of cancer among commercial airline pilots. Occupational & Environmental Medicine.

57, 175-179. doi:10.1136/oem.57.3.175.

SOURCES

& Security and the Association of Flight Attendants17 found that when compared to the general public of the same age and sex, flight attendants had a 30% higher rate of breast cancer, and a melanoma rate that was double. A study from eight European countries found a slight increase in breast cancer among female cabin crew and an elevated skin cancer death rate among the males. Researchers from Iceland showed a significant increase in breast cancer risk for female flight attendants who worked five years or more.

This is interesting because Iceland is on the edge of the Arctic at a very high latitude. Finally, a Swedish study found increased melanoma in both male and female cabin crew. Similar statistics can be found for airline pilots, who generally have a melanoma rate 10 times greater than the public. Their melanoma rate is 15 times higher if they’re flying internationally, and 25 times higher if their flights pass through five or more time zones.18 The best thing to mitigate radiation exposure in flight is to fly at night when 99% of the sun’s radiation is blocked by the earth. If you can sleep on a plane, definitely go for the red-eye flights. Astaxanthin is an antioxidant that’s 64 times more powerful than vitamin C and is excellent at absorbing UVB rays and neutralizing free radicals before they do their damage.

Take 4mg per day, but it must be started three weeks before the flight. Eat a diet high in antioxidants leading up to departure - that means lots of leafy greens, vegetables, berries, and high quality saturated fats from organic red meat and real butter for vitamins E and D. Try to take an Epsom salt and baking soda bath soon after the flight to remove any toxins from the body.

The most powerful and mother of all antioxidants is glutathione, a compound of three amino acids. While it’s made by the body, everything from poor diet, stress, medications, toxins, aging and yes, radiation can deplete our levels. Glutathione deficiency is found in nearly all seriously ill patients. You can boost your glutathione production by eating sulfur rich foods like cabbage, broccoli, kale and cauliflower, exercising regularly, taking a vitamin B complex and supplementing with the herb Milk Thistle. Glutathione supplements aren’t absorbed very well through the digestive system, which is why I offer my patients a high-vitamin, antioxidant IV with glutathione before and after they return from travel.

A PARTNER IN PROGRESS When going through a health crisis or any other serious life challenge, it’s easy to feel like you’re in it alone. While the support of family and friends is very helpful, it often takes the knowledge and advice of someone who’s been where you are to provide the right kind of inspiration and guidance to see you through to success.

With the Master Mind Mentorship Program (M3P), Dr. Sadeghi becomes your partner in what may be the most important race of your life. By utilizing the patented techniques of Integrative Psycho-Synthesis (iPs), participants work with Dr. Sadeghi to explore and neutralize the deeper aspects of their negative emotions, relationships, fears and subconscious limiting beliefs that are at the core of their problem. The progressive, 12-week course includes weekly one-on-one phone consultations with Dr. Sadeghi to assess progress, clarify goals and devise a proactive strategy for the manifestation of healing in the areas of life where it’s most needed.

To ensure your success, Dr. Sadeghi will join you in co-creation, practicing directed intention on your behalf to accelerate the realization of your goal.

M3P is the most powerful psycho-spiritual intervention that merges psychological exploration and spiritual inspiration with physical motivation to synchronize mind, body and behavior.

Based on availability, be prepared to schedule as far as six months in advance.

Succeed with the inspiration and guidance of Dr. Sadeghi’s patented mentorship program!

behiveofhealing.com/m3p

To provide the maximum amount of personal attention, Dr. Sadeghi chooses to work with only a small number of clients at any one time. Be advised that space is limited.

Being Beautiful hether I like it or not, as an American woman, the concept of beauty is one that has affected me my entire life. Cultural standards of beauty during my time have included: the late 50s-early 60s conservative form-fitted dresses, well-positioned hair, mostly covered up body; the late 60s-70s - burn your bra, let it all hang out, look natural, “everything is beautiful in its own way”, to 80s, 90s, and now the 2000s, where we are back to push-up and padded bras, combined with modern fitness fashion and tight formfitting clothes that emphasize strong, thin, muscular bodies.

These days we are encouraged to frequent nail, hair, brow, and booty salons, as well as use Botox and plastic surgery as “beauty” procedures, which are not just for celebrities, but for average women as well. Looking “natural” is paramount, but not to the exclusion of being highly fashionable and self-consciously well put together. I am also witnessing trends encouraging us all to wear ourselves with relentless pride!

By Mary Abrams

said to be relative to changing cultural and social perceptions, which opens up possibilities for norms to change. Finally if we fully embrace beauty as a human invention, we can see that beauty is an experience involving our entire body-feelingminding system, and that beauty arrives through the feeling movement of joy, revealing to us that the beholder of beauty and the beauty-filled one are ONE. How does a person become ONE with their body-feelingminding self? Women and men are often conscious of their bodies in different ways throughout life. Sometimes men are more comfortable, and many times less comfortable with how their bodies feel, what they think about their bodies, and how their feeling consciousness fits in, or does not fit in with cultural beauty standards. During puberty, and in menopause, a woman’s entire experience of body changes, and what looks and feels beautiful comes up for question from the inside of her body-feeling-minding experience, as well as from the outside.

Mostly, when it comes to all the different cultural messages promoting beauty, I end up feeling confused. What looks beautiful according to the cultural standards around me does not always coordinate with what I am told is beautiful, and further, I find myself confused by the ways in which my own beauty is based on how my feelings and cultural input collide, conspire, or conflict. What to do with this beautiful confusion?

In between the extremes of hormonal life changes our bodies are constantly adjusting to each moment of being – injury or illness, diet, exercise, relationships, etc. We think we know our bodies, and suddenly we don’t. What does it mean to be beautiful when we feel unknown to our body? Unknown to ourselves? Can we be beautiful while experiencing ugliness, strangeness, awkwardness, blobby-ness, or weakness? Can we be beautiful without being seen?

In attending to confusion around beauty it is essential to understand that the concept of beauty has multiple meanings.

Beauty can be in the eye of the beholder, but if the beholder is unaware of beauty, there is a lack of consciousness. Beauty can be said to exist in predefined forms and norms, but this kind of beauty is objectified and limited. And, beauty can be

Counter to what most of us have learned from our families and the culture, body awareness or body knowing is a lifelong learning, and body awareness is a lifelong resource for developing joy or vitality without discord. In this sense, body awareness is an ongoing exploration of the possibilities for living a life filled with beauty. Unfortunately, most of us

38

shy away from the vast array of sensations alive in our bodies due to lack of support in relation to discomfort, trauma, taboos, and shame.

“Being ONE with ourselves makes it possible to know the experience of Joy, of vitality without discord, and to recognize the beauty in all that is.”

All feelings, which motivate all our decisions, thoughts, and movements in life, are generated from the bodily process known as the affective system. This system is the biology of our emotions.

The affect system or affects are moving in us to help us know when movements in our world of being—inside and outside our bodies—are changing in ways that would be beneficial for us to pay attention to. Over time, our affects combine with our experiences and memories, and this is how we develop emotionally.

Some basic information on how affects and memory combine in the creation of emotion is highlighted in the 2015 Disney movie Inside Out. Attending to feeling awareness and developing a vocabulary for feelings is an important step in supporting and becoming aware of our body-feeling-minding self. Another essential step is attending to direct bodily experience through sensation awareness. In this way, we begin to attend the movement of affective flow and get to the source of our feelings, our emotions, and a more fully felt understanding of beauty.

A simple way to access direct bodily awareness is to feel your breathing. Not to assess it, judge it, or change it, but to just feel the way your breath flows in… and flows out.

Take a few moments, soften your focus from reading and feel: inhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaling…………………… exhhhhhhaaaaaaaling.

Do this a few times. Then do it a few more times by inhaling through your nose, and slowly exhaling through your nose with your mouth gently closed.

Now, notice your body. What sensations or movements are coming alive in your awareness? See if you can describe them in the most basic ways—textures, colors, rhythms, vibrations. As you notice these sensations, what thoughts, words, images emerge? Notice whether your body wants to move, sway, rock, shake, spiral, settle, drift. Let your body move just as big or small as you feel.

As you feel with, attend, and move with these sensations, thoughts, and images, ask yourself—What do I need? Along with any words or images that come to you, notice what your body does with this question—What do I need?

Now pause…………………………………………………………………………………………

Whatever you did or did not do with the invitation above to feel your breathing and attend bodily sensations and movement, through the experience of the words on this page, you have awoken to more fullness of the silent level. This non-words level is our bodily processes alive with the mystery and beauty of life. The more we attend ourselves at the silent level the more resources we have for health, for our sense of well-being, for how we relate with ourselves, and for how we relate with the world around us.

Being ONE with the beholder of beauty is all that our bodies know at a silent level. Bringing more conscious attention to this feeling process supports us as we navigate our way through life, coordinating, conspiring, and conflicting with all the cultural information on beauty. Being ONE with ourselves makes it possible to know the experience of Joy, of vitality without discord, and to recognize the beauty in all that is.

Mary Abrams loves people, bodies, and moving. Her work is inspired by her master’s degree in Consciousness Studies focusing on embodied movement, the biology of emotion, and Epistemics. She is a Registered Somatic Movement Educator (RSME - ISMETA), and owner/director of Moving Body Resources in New York City. Mary works privately, teaches groups around the world, and currently leads the MA Dance & Somatic Well-being course in the USA. (movingbodyresources.com)

39

THE INTENTION BEHIND THE UNIQUE DESIGN OF BE HIVE OF HEALING & HAPPY KIDS DENTAL PLANET

BY DR. SHERRY SAMI

Being practitioners of holistic medicine, my husband, Habib, and I took special care in designing Be Hive of Healing Integrative Medical Center and Happy Kids Dental Planet when they came together under one roof three years ago.

Integrative medical research tells us that every aspect of a patient’s life experience affects the quality of his or her health and healing. This includes the healing environment in which the patient finds him or herself.

With this in mind, we wanted the design of our new facility to create an atmosphere that evoked peace and positivity for every patient in a way that was powerfully supportive of their healing process. It was our intention to create an environment that was so uplifting and immersive that it was its own healing intervention. Judging from the responses of our patients, that’s exactly what it turned out to be.

Our clinic is situated in a beautiful pastoral setting among rolling hills, against the backdrop of the Santa Monica Mountains. Far away from the agitating energy of the city, the majestic stillness of nature all around the clinic makes it possible for patients to connect to the rejuvenating powers of the landscape.

Inside the entrance gate, visitors find themselves surrounded by the flowering shrubs and vibrant succulents of the Healing Tranquility Garden. Beneath the canopy, trickling, hand-carved fountains and the 9ft. golden guardian angel that stands watch over this sacred space, evoke feelings of reverence. Many patients sit and meditate here, or follow a nearby walking path to calm their hearts and clear their minds.

Upon stepping into the reception area of Be Hive of Healing, it becomes apparent that this isn’t the usual doctor’s office. We have forgone blaring TVs and tabloid magazines, in favor of soothing music played on natural instruments. Aromatherapy is employed, with essential oils scenting the air to assist patients in centering themselves in preparation for their consultation or treatment.

Many patients arrive from around the world having already exhausted their treatment options through standard allopathic medicine. Sensitive to this fact, interior designer, Seva Khalsa, stressed that she wanted to create an atmosphere that renewed each patient’s healing consciousness, and supported their highest visions of what was possible for them.

Upon arriving, she wanted them to feel that this was a new beginning in their healing journey.

“I wanted people to have the immediate sense that they could get well there, that healing really is possible,” Khalsa shared. “It was important to generate a consciousness of hope with everything that surrounded them.”

This is exactly the feeling patients have said they experience when they see the shimmering life-size pair of angel wings along the hallway, or sit in the IV room in the presence of the 8ft mural of Buddha. Khalsa explained that these were deliberate choices, made to provide patients with a tangible feeling of being surrounded by a spiritual power greater than themselves. She wanted them to feel that, if they were so moved, they could call upon this spiritual power in the course of their healing.

“I wanted to provide an atmosphere of holiness and elevation, and evoke the presence of God or whatever power the patient holds precious or considers to be greater than him or herself,” Khalsa explained. “I wanted to make the patients comfortable enough that they could connect with that power and understand that their journey doesn’t end here, but extends far beyond the decorated walls.”

The ornate and intricate design of the floor-to-ceiling tile work of the wet room, patterned after the opulence of the ancient Turkish baths, transports patients into a deeper level of relaxation that enhances the body’s ability to respond better and recover more quickly from treatments like lymphatic rejuvenation therapy. Habib and I had often felt that this new Be Hive of Healing, as we’d envisioned it, was a healing idea whose time was imminent, and we’re so glad that because of the help of our creative friends, that time for us is now.

Learn more at behiveofhealing.com.

Just a few steps from Be Hive of Healing, on the other side of the Healing Tranquility Garden, is my pediatric dental and orthodontics practice, Happy Kids Dental Planet. Almost from the very first day it opened, it seems a week doesn’t go by without at least a few parents of my patients commenting on how beautiful my clinic is, and how they’ve never seen anything quite like it. I have to admit that until I realized the dream of opening my own office, neither had I. It only existed in my mind and on the vision board I gave to the designer as a source of inspiration. In the same way that Be Hive of Healing provides an immersive healing experience for its patients, I wanted to provide for my little patients, an environment that stimulated their developing minds and inspired a sense of wonder. The end result is an incredibly sensory rich environment that draws on the child’s whimsical sense of curiosity.

The feedback I hear most often from parents is that they experience a sense of calm when they enter the waiting area. That’s probably because there are no video games available or TVs with cartoons streaming nonstop. Instead, children are provided with a library of books for varying ages that most schools would envy, and a large selection of wooden toys to challenge their expanding minds.

Throughout the office, visitors are greeted by a profusion of butterflies flitting across the walls and clustering by the hundreds in the corners of the ceiling. Exotic birds peek down curiously from their painted perches, which extend from the colorful canopy behind the crown molding.

The guardians of Happy Kids Dental Planet are the enchanted and spritely fairies that appear all over the clinic, buzzing here and there. To make sure children take note of their magical presence, a fairy is painted at the entrance of each room about one-third of the way up, right at a child’s eye level. There’s even a tiny fairy door where, if children are quick, they can catch the fairies as they come and go from the office!

From the towering tree that provides calming shelter in the x-ray room, and the ethereal clouds that float lazily by on the ceiling, to the imaginative artwork that fills the waiting area, the goal in creating this highly stylized artwork was to capture the playful spirit of children. No matter where a child might look, he or she will always discover something new. Even the sink in the bathroom has fish painted on the inside of the bowl!

To help calm and engage children, each dental chair looks out a window into a special fairy garden, where fairies peek out from behind rocks and frolic among the flowers. The partition between each dental chair is made of multi-colored, hand-blown glass, reminiscent of the creative and free-flowing nature of children. It’s amazing how well children do during their treatment when they know they’ll have a chance to go outside afterward and explore the fairy garden, or perhaps pluck an orange from one of our 13 organic fruit trees.

Randomly spread across the walls amidst the depictions of magical forests alive with fairies, butterflies, and birds are inspirational quotes that, when children are old enough to read them, let them know how and why they are so precious to us. This was a conscious choice to give both parents and children a sense of being connected to something larger than themselves.

“I wanted kids to feel valued instead of just entertained,” Khalsa explained, “and I wanted to manifest artistically what children are to us spiritually.”

If life imitates art, then it really is a wonderful life at Happy Kids Dental Planet. It seems there many parents and children who can attest to that fact, and a few fairies too. Learn more at behiveofhealing.com.

Seva Khalsa is associated with TKG West in Los Angeles. seva@tkgwest.com

CREATIVE DISCIPLINE, CONNECTED FAMILY: PARENTING IDEAS FOR YOUNG CHILDREN

By Lou Harvey-Zahra

“Creative Discipline” is a bag of useful tools for those challenging moments that naturally occur with all young children up to about seven years of age. These techniques can transform challenging moments, while keeping parent and child connected. A desired behavior will be achieved, or a negative behavior prevented, but how parents find their way there will be a matter of creative choice. There are many pathways in disciplining, and I am outlining techniques that empower both parent and child, are fun, encourage mutual understanding, and demonstrate loving.

It is paradoxical to see a parent shout, “No shouting!” or hit in response to a child’s rough behavior. Children who are made to sit alone in corners, often put up a protective wall.

Rather than reacting, pointing a finger, or isolating, when toddlers and young children display inappropriate behaviors, the first response should be, why? Behaviors are a means of communication. Is the child tired or hungry? Does he or she need the pace to be slowed down, or some special time with you? Is the child being loud or messy to be purposely disruptive, or is she being creative and inquisitive?

Does the child understand the expected behavior? Does he or she require a demonstration? If the undesirable behaviors tend to repeat themselves, keep a daily diary of when these behaviors happen. Spend time pondering why a behavior is happening. This may offer insight into the child’s perspective and experience. Thinking about the cause of the behavior will stop you from reacting unconsciously, and allow you to respond in a more compassionate way.

46

Photo by: London Scout @scoutthecity.com

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

AFTER PONDERING THE POSSIBLE CAUSES OF YOUR CHILD’S DIFFICULT BEHAVIOR, THE 6 FOLLOWING CREATIVE DISCIPLINE TOOLS CAN BE TRIED:

1

BY CHANGING THE ENVIRONMENT, YOU CAN TRANSFORM YOUR CHILD’S BEHAVIOR.

SCENARIO: Your child does not want to go to bed, because life is too fun, or she’d like more connection time with you!

Make sure your child is not overstimulated by TV or video games at bed/bath time.

Introduce a game she can play with you that’s fun and special - a piggy back ride to the bathroom… then, while she’s brushing her teeth, ask her to have each tooth speak about what its favorite part of the day was.

Have your child say goodnight to three things in her bedroom.

Sing a loving song, stroke your child’s head and whisper kind words as she falls asleep.

Make sure you are connected with your child at these sacred times and be consistent with a fun and loving bedtime rhythm. A child’s spontaneity and ability to be in the moment allows for the art of “redirection.” Isolate the action a child is displaying and redirect it into a safe and positive play idea.

SCENARIO: Your toddler is throwing toys inside. (They do look great flying through the air and toddlers love to experience their power over things!)

Keep a soft fabric ball and a basket nearby. Your instruction might be: “Here… throw a ball, not your toys. Poor toy… let’s put that back on the shelf. Throw the ball into the basket… Goal! Balls are for throwing… Well done!”

SCENARIO: Your child is running and shouting inside. (Young children like to move. It fires up the brain neurons!)

You might suggest: “Go out into the garden… and run to that tree and back three times.

I’ll watch you through the window. Outside is where you can run and shout.”

2

48

RE-DIRECT TO A WHOLE NEW ACTIVITY, WHEN CONTINUAL CHALLENGING BEHAVIORS OCCUR. Re-direction can quickly change a child’s mood. For instance, if your child is tired and grumpy, make a fort by throwing a bed sheet over the dining room table, put books and snacks underneath, and encourage quieter, calmer play under the table. On the other hand, if your child has excess energy to burn, encourage him to play outside. If you have household chores to do, include your child… after all, busy hands can’t make mischief!

All too often parents fall into the trap of reacting to an inappropriate behavior by saying – sometimes in a raised voice – “Don’t do…, or No…, or Stop it!” With this type of command, the child hears what to not do, but gets no real guidance about what the appropriate way of behaving might be. Each time your child displays a negative behavior, you are presented with an opportunity to teach him or her how to live in this world. The most commonly used methods for disciplining children reinforce the negative. I urge you to emphasize the positive instead.

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

3

GIVE YOUR CHILD A LOVING LESSON WHEN HIS BEHAVIOR IS INAPPROPRIATE. SCENARIO: Your child is pulling a cat’s tail.

You might say, “We stroke a cat like this.” (Give a demonstration.) “Let’s do it together.”

(Place the child’s hand on the cat and stroke together.) “He loves to be treated kindly and softly, this is the way to stroke a cat. Great, you are doing such a good job being gentle. He loves that. Well done!”

SCENARIO: Your child is hitting a playmate to get a toy.

Say, “hands down” in a firm manner, re-directing your child to keep his hands to himself.

Encourage your child to ask for a turn with the toy, and teach the child who has been hurt to say, “Stop! I don’t like that.” Find similar toys for the children to play with. Use a timer to indicate how long each child has to play with the toy, so they can learn about how to take turns. You can make it a turn-taking game! Model making an apology for your child. Demonstrate gentleness and kindness in a friendship context.

4

MAKE A CHALLENGING SITUATION INTO A GAME WHEN YOU NEED YOUR CHILD TO COMPLETE A TASK. Playing games requires you and your child to connect and have fun. This trick is very child-friendly.

SCENARIO: Your toddler refuses to put on his socks, or your older child will not dress herself.

Make getting dressed a game.

To your toddler, playfully say something like, “I’m Sandy Sock and I love to eat toes.

I eat them all the way up… look at that, all the way up to the ankle!”

To your older child, you might say something like, “Can you put your clothes on by the time I make a cup of tea? Race you! Ready… go!”

5

OFFERING A CHOICE BETWEEN TWO SELECTED ITEMS CAN HELP DURING CHALLENGING MOMENTS. The trick is to offer a very limited choice between two alternatives if defiant behavior is imminent. Parents are in control of the two choices, children are in control of the outcome.

This creates a win-win solution.

SCENARIO: Your child is asking for an inappropriate snack item while shopping.

Offer two healthy snack alternatives: a fruit roll or some veggie chips. If your child still asks for the candy bar, let him or her know that it is either the fruit roll or the veggie chips, or nothing at all!

49

6

A CHOICE CAN BE GIVEN THAT INCLUDES THE “QUIET REMOVAL.” If, after re-direction, changing the environment, or playing a game, your child is still displaying an inappropriate behavior, a choice can be given which includes the “quiet removal.”

SCENARIO: Your child is hitting a playmate to get a toy.

What you might say: “Let’s use the timer to take turns, or put the toy up high… Which one do you choose?”

Another approach: “Use clever hands with your friends, and no hitting, or come and sit with me to calm down. Your choice.”

If your child asks for another chance, encourage him to re-pair, re-play, or re-do the situation. You can role-model the correct way to behave. Otherwise re-direct to a new activity after a period of quiet removal.

IN CONCLUSION

Photo by: London Scout @scoutthecity.com

If you talk reasonably, teach positively and lovingly, but guide firmly, these approaches will become the communication skills your children will learn to use themselves. It’s a wonderful experience, after years of role-modeling, to see your children treat others with respect, and witness your positive behavior and attitude coming from them. Children brought up with creative discipline techniques will know how to communicate clearly and honestly, and treat others with respect and kindness.

Remember that no child or parent is perfect, and neither should they be, as it is our mistakes that help us to learn and grow. Parenting can be like a dance: two steps forward and one step back. Try to be conscious of how things worked out during and after each incident with your child. And try again tomorrow…

LOU’S LOVE BUTTON TIPS If a trying moment occurs, look at your love button and pause (unless it is an unsafe situation – react if this is the case!), step into your child’s shoes and ponder, why?

See if you can understand the motive behind your child’s challenging behavior.

Pause and remember that “discipline” means to teach!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Lou Harvey-Zahra is a parenting author and teacher, and parent of two.

Lou resides in Melbourne, Australia and presents Conscious Parenting and Creative Discipline workshops worldwide. Her books include the bestseller Happy Child, Happy Home, and her new book Creative Discipline, Connected Family. Her books are available on all online bookstores. See Lou’s website, skiptomylouparenting.com, for more parenting ideas.

THE IMPORTANCE OF BREASTFEEDING

GIVE YOUR BABY THE BEST POSSIBLE CHANCE FOR OPTIMAL GROWTH AND DEVELOPMENT.

New mothers sometimes have difficulty producing milk for their babies and as a result choose formula as a substitute. One of the most important first decisions a new mother can ever make is to choose to breastfeed her baby. No food other than breast milk even comes close to providing a baby with the crucial nutrients in the perfect ratios that are needed for its optimal development, especially of the nervous and immune systems. If at all possible, formula should be avoided, particularly the soy variety because of the anti-nutrients and toxins soy contains such as: phytates that bind to minerals like calcium and prevent their absorption, trypsin inhibitors which prevent protein absorption and cause stunted growth, goitrogens that block synthesis of thyroid hormones, phyto-estrogens which prevent natural estrogen absorption and forced early puberty in girls while causing significant genital malformations in boys, MSG, a powerful neurotoxin, that forms as a result of the processing as well as high levels of aluminum. It’s also important to know that nearly 95% of all soy in the U.S. is genetically modified and heavily sprayed with the neurotoxin herbicide, glyphosate (RoundUp).

If you’re having trouble producing breast milk, consider Healing Milk Flow, a proprietary tincture blend specifically formulated by Dr. Sadeghi to stimulate milk production. Optimally balanced and powerfully effective, active ingredients include: Rubus idaeus (raspberry), Carduus marianus (milk thistle), Medicago sativa (alfalfa), Humulus lulupus (hops) and Foeniculum volgare (fennel) oil. Give your baby the best possible chance for optimal growth and development by choosing to breastfeed and utilizing Healing Milk Flow. If other extenuating circumstances exist that prevent breastfeeding, please consult Dr. Sadeghi before choosing commercial baby formula.

There are also two excellent natural baby formula recipes to be found at the Weston A. Price Foundation website. One is milk-based, while the other is non-dairy hypoallergenic.

HEALING MILK FLOW Give your baby the best possible chance for optimal growth and development by breastfeeding and Utilizing Healing Milk Flow.

BEHIVEOFLIFE.COM/MILKFLOW

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

MetaHealing with the Iceman

What we see as imperfections in our lives, hold the most potential for our greatest growth Dr. Habib Sadeghi & Dr. Sherry Sami have often had people tell me that a crisis they endured turned out to be one of the best things that ever happened to them. Of course, they didn’t see it at the time, but in hindsight they could see that their misfortune was actually the catalyst for good, which not only benefited them, but other people as well. I can certainly vouch for that. Without my experience with cancer, I would never have gained the knowledge I now have, nor would I have been able to help others heal from so-called terminal illnesses. I would have become a neuro-ophthalmologist instead.

Yes, it’s the things we see as imperfections in our lives, the dis-eases, disasters, and losses, that hold the most potential for our greatest growth. I recently had a laugh when I read a short news article about how Caesar’s Palace in Las Vegas decided they would set themselves apart by creating a smooth golf ball without the traditional dimples on the surface. Imagine their dismay when golfers began returning the balls by the bunch.

It turned out that the Caesar’s golf balls traveled half as far as the traditional dimpled golf balls. They failed to realize that it is the imperfections or dimples on the ball’s surface that create lift at high velocities. In order to make something look “perfect,” they severely limited its performance capabilities. In the same way, what we see as life’s imperfections allow us to move farther, if we let them.

In 1995, Wim Hof, a Dutchman with four children, received devastating news. His wife had committed suicide. Not only had he lost the love of his life in an abrupt and unexpected way, he was now left to raise his young children on his own. To cope

52

with the unbearable grief, Wim instinctively started doing his own style of deep breathing exercises. After some time, Wim discovered that through deep breathing and concentration, he could consciously control certain aspects of his physical state. Before long, he was submerging himself in the frigid waters of Holland without so much as a shiver. In fact, Wim has been submerged in ice up to his neck for nearly two hours at a time while consciously being able to maintain his core body temperature.

That’s not all. He climbed Mount Kilimanjaro in two days wearing nothing but a pair of shorts. He nearly got to the top of Mount Everest in another shorts-only climb, but a foot injury stopped him at 21,982 feet. He ran a standard marathon (26 miles) in the Arctic Circle near Finland, also in shorts, when the temperature was -4 degrees Fahrenheit. On the flipside, he’s run a full marathon in the Namib Desert without taking a single drink of water.

Aside from his 20 Guinness World Records, the greatest gift Wim is giving to the world, as a result of his tragedy, is real scientific knowledge about how humans can consciously control their autonomic nervous system, which regulates the functions of all internal organs. Even more exciting is the fact that Wim is able to use his breathing and concentration techniques to engage his immune system. After researchers injected him with a bacterial endotoxin that should have resulted in fever, chills, and headaches, Wim was able to avoid the traditionally strong immune response by consciously secreting more adrenaline.

immune systems to avoid experiencing symptoms from the same endotoxin that was administered to him.1

“The greatest gift Wim is giving to the world as a result of his tragedy, is real scientific knowledge about how humans can consciously control their autonomic nervous system, which regulates the functions of all internal organs.”

In integrative medicine, we’ve always known that the mind plays the primary role in healing. Unfortunately, decades of patient case studies showing miraculous recoveries are only looked upon as anecdotal. Wim’s contributions are changing all that. Not only is he giving mind/body medicine scientific credibility, he’s teaching us all how to become our own metaphysicians – to work “beyond” the physician, toward our own healing.

Although he couldn’t have known it 20 years ago, the death of his wife held a very powerful gift for Wim, and most likely, the rest of the human race. The result is that Wim is breaking down mind/body barriers that he, and even science, never thought possible. Both our stories are testaments to the fact that, at its core, every problem holds the seed of an equal or greater opportunity if we, without judgment, trust the process of life to lead us through it. Wim’s invaluable example bolstered me through a portion of last year after my brother, Mehrdad, decided to complete his earthly journey prematurely.

If you’d like to learn more about this incredible man, you can

Although Wim is called The Iceman, he says he’s no Superman.

He insists everyone can do what he does, and in fact, he’s teaching others to accomplish the same feats. In a study performed at Radboud University in the Netherlands, twelve of his students were also able to consciously modulate their

find the documentary, Inside the Superhuman World of the Iceman, online, or you can visit his website: icemanwimhof.com.

(1) Matthijs Kox, Monique Stoffels, et al The Influence of Concentration/Meditation on Autonomic Nervous System Activity and the Innate Immune Response: A Case Study. Psychosomatic Medicine, June 2012 vol. 74 no. 5 489-494. doi: 10.1097/ PSY.0b013e3182583c6d

53

54

Child Interrupted Why the rush to early academic education is harming children and altering childhood BY: DR. HABIB SADEGHI & DR. SHERRY SAMI

Featured on:

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

everal months ago, nearly 65,000 students in New York City slung their backpacks on and paraded out into the world ready to start the 20162017 school year. At this moment, they’re knee deep in a rigorous curriculum that includes language arts, math, science, social studies, history, civics and government, economics, career development, the arts, and technology.1 They’re studying between six and seven hours each day, five days a week, to secure their places in the working world of the future. Oh, and they’re four-year-olds.

In 2014, New York City instituted full-day Universal Prekindergarten in a move that the media called “one of the nation’s most ambitious experiments in public school education reform.”2 The implementation of rigorous academic discipline much earlier in life is becoming a trend across the country. This trend arises from several unproven, but familiar theories, namely that it will help close the achievement gap for disadvantaged children, ensure American students keep pace with their classmates around the world, and raise lagging international achievement test scores. It has also been said that it will secure our children’s place in a competitive global job market. Really? At four?

In spite of these claims, a rising tide of education and healthcare experts are advising against exposing young children to regimented academic instruction. An overwhelming amount of research shows that doing so interrupts normal child development and changes the way children think, behave and perceive the world.

The schoolification of early childhood, and all the rigors and responsibilities that come with it, are damaging to children because their minds and bodies are designed to learn and grow through unstructured creative play and exploration.

time, milk and cookies, and social games is largely gone.

When polled, 65% of kindergarten teachers felt strongly that children should be able to read before entering grade school.4 This aggressively academic approach to early childhood is tearing kids down and burning them out. Unfortunately, among many teachers and education administrators, the early education myth refuses to die.

Barely a year after New York City Mayor, Bill De Blasio, launched Universal Prekindergarten, parents were pleading with him to move to a half-day schedule because their four-year-olds were “exhausted” from the daily grind and heavy workloads.5 When De Blasio stood by his original plan and provided no other options, angry parents questioned the validity of the program by asserting that, “The mayor is not a developmental psychologist.”6 The internet is awash with stories from desperate parents describing how their once bright-eyed five-yearolds are coming home listless, irritable, disinterested or exhausted from a full day of drills, exercises, tests and memorization. Parents describe many heartbreaking instances of children bursting into tears or simply laying their heads down on the kitchen table because they just can’t keep up with the pressure of learning to read.

They are subjected to repeated testing, and are asked to memorize vocabulary lists, write weekly essays and do homework nightly. And if that’s not enough, they are expected to perform at an aptitude level a full year or two higher than their actual age. Left with no other options, some parents have chosen to relocate to different school districts or states where academics aren’t introduced so aggressively at such an early age.7

According to the Education Commission of the States, compulsory education at the age of five beginning “The intrusion of academic It turns out that the with kindergarten education in early life has federal government is mandated in finally had to admit that fifteen states. In the been shown to prevent after forty-seven years remaining thirty-five children from performing as and $200 billion, the states, kindergarten well as they normally would in low-income preschool is offered at a full program, Head Start, or half-day, or for a grade school because by that provided no lasting few hours, but is not time, they’re stressed out and benefit to children, even mandatory. Of these no longer enjoy learning.” when tested up to the states, twenty one third grade.3 In fact, the require academic intrusion of academic education beginning education in early life has been shown to prevent children at age six, twelve at age seven, and two at age eight.8 from performing as well as they normally would in grade Even so, there are those who believe in the early school because by that time, they’re stressed out and education myth so fervently that every few years there no longer enjoy learning. are regular movements to make kindergarten mandatory nationwide,9 push for full-day kindergarten,10 or lengthen the school year.

baby burnout

The obsession with early academic education among influential child development experts and educrats in government has resulted in preschool programs that now include most of what used to be learned in kindergarten and much of first grade. The kindergarten of yore, in which children enjoyed finger painting, story

56

In 2013, New York City spent $18.6 million over three years to lengthen the school day by an incredible 2.5 hours for 2,000 students who were struggling in reading.

This meant that many students were in class until 6pm every night.11 Needless to say, the pilot program didn’t foster a love for reading or learning. After a certain threshold is reached, everything will provide diminishing

50 STATE COMPARISON Kindergarten & Early Education Policies

COMPULSORY EDUCATION AGE Age Children Must Attend School By

returns, even education. Somewhere along the way, someone decided that creative play for young children was just meaningless distraction from “real” education, when in fact, play is the process of education itself. When will the educrats realize that more hours in the school day, more months in the school year, a more difficult curriculum, and more money in the budget don’t make kids smarter?

In the UK, many children receive formal academic instruction in literacy and numeracy at age four, with mandatory schooling starting at age five. The reality of overwhelmed, stressed out children, barely past their toddler years, is an unfortunate but familiar problem there. In 2013, more than a hundred teachers, education writers, and academics wrote to then Secretary of State of Education, Michael Gove, to emphasize the developmental and psychological dangers of forcing the “tests and targets that dominate primary education” on children younger than six or seven in the name of “school readiness.” Sadly, a spokesperson from the Secretary’s office replied with a statement that demonstrates how entrenched educrats are in the idea that children who are introduced to academics sooner will get better results later: “These people represent the powerful and badly misguided lobby who are responsible for the devaluation of exams and the culture of low expectations in state schools. We need a system that aims to prepare pupils to solve hard problems in calculus or be a poet or engineer – a system freed from the grip of those who bleat bogus pop-

psychology about ‘self-image’, which is an excuse for not teaching poor children how to add up.”12 This attitude is precisely why any serious reform can’t happen from the top down, but must come from the bottom up, by a grassroots movement of concerned parents and educators.

Common Core, Common Problem Unless you homeschool or can afford to pay for a private school, it’s almost impossible for a young child in the U.S. to avoid the aggressive academic approach. That’s because beginning around 2009, the U.S. nationalized public school instruction by providing states with financial incentives to sign on to the Common Core curriculum, a unified system of instruction that runs from prekindergarten through high school, and promises to improve the college and career readiness of American students.

It used to be that individual states laid down subject requirements for school instruction, and it was largely left to local school boards to decide at what grade level those subjects would be introduced, the methods by which they would be taught, and what books and materials they would use. This structure not only provided parents with more choices based on curriculum and approach, but it gave teachers vastly more freedom to choose how they taught subjects in order to reach children who learn in different ways.

Now that forty-six states have accepted the

57

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

government grants and signed on to Common Core, local school boards play virtually no role in choosing curriculum, or how math, science, language arts, history and social studies are taught. Only Texas, Nebraska, Alaska and Virginia turned down the federal grants and maintained local control of education in their states. Now, most of the nation teaches the same subjects in exactly the same way because educrats in a privately-funded think tank claimed American students were lagging behind their international peers and that education in the U.S. needed standardization. But in the end, the only result standardization can ever achieve is to make everything the same. Who decided all children were the same and that there was only one way to learn?

To ensure they’re progressing according to state expectations, students are administered high stakes diagnostic and achievement tests from the first through tenth grades that generally last for more than six hours over the course of three days. Because student results are reflected in teacher evaluations, teachers are under a great deal of pressure to spend the majority of their time “teaching to the test,” with little to no opportunity to explore other topics.

The mounting pressure to perform on recurring standardized tests has caused great anxiety in students at all grade levels, and resulted in a nationwide parentinitiated protest movement that culminated in parents “Somewhere along the Naturally, Common Core not allowing their children way, someone decided has been surrounded by to be tested. In spring controversy since the that creative play for 2015, 155,000 students day it was implemented. in New York refused to young children was just Parents and teachers, as sit for the Common Core meaningless distraction well as education and standardized state test in child development experts from “real” education, when English Language Arts.14 A around the country, regularly year later, elementary and in fact, play is the process protest many aspects of middle schools on Long of education itself.” the program, including the Island were experiencing introduction of academic refusal rates of between material and workloads that 60% and 70% of all students aren’t age-appropriate for from the third through younger children, and that ultimately set them up to eighth grades. Parents started calling for a national fail. New York City’s Universal Prekindergarten is based opt-out day, and proposed a march on Washington D.C.15 on Common Core principles. This is a small sample of Also of concern to parents and educators is the some of the academic and abstract skills four-year-olds observation that Common Core doesn’t challenge are expected to demonstrate in just two of their subjects, children with increasingly complex age-appropriate language arts and math.13 material, but rather makes basic material unnecessarily Compare and contrast two stories relating to the same topic…student will make cultural connections to text and self Differentiate letters from numerals Participate in shared research and writing projects Identify new meanings for familiar words and apply them accurately Distinguish shades of meaning among verbs describing the same general action Demonstrate emergent phonics, printing, capitalization, and understanding and use of common interrogative words and prepositions Count to 20 Understand the relationship between numbers and quantities Demonstrate an understanding of addition and subtraction Identify measurable attributes like length, height and width

58

more difficult. For example, instead of teaching the most common two or three-step algorithm to solve a math problem in the easiest and quickest way, Common Core requires children to use entirely different forms of counterintuitive calculations that often involve ten to fifteen or more additional steps to reach the same answer. Kids are stressing out because getting the right answer isn’t enough anymore. They must show their work, and get the right answer in the “right” way.16 One of the results of this approach are that bright children start to think they are not smart, and students who need extra help don’t even bother trying.

Adding to these frustrations are complaints from children and parents that Common Core frequently presents test questions and homework assignments with confusing or highly ambiguous directions. The internet is awash with thousands of articles and videos of parents with advanced degrees struggling to help their befuddled children with their Common Core homework, but not being able to make sense out of the convoluted instructions or objectives.17 Acting Secretary of the U.S. Department of Education, John King, Jr., has conceded that high-stakes testing and the way in which Common Core material is presented is designed so that 70% of students will fail! According to the public school advocacy group, the Network for

Public Education (NPE), setting students up to do poorly not only undermines public schools, but creates a “false narrative” that the system is failing children.18

What Education Crisis?

We were sold the idea that standardizing education and the introduction of aggressive academic instruction at younger ages was necessary because American students were lagging behind the rest of the world, and that our existing educational system was failing. But is that really true? Christopher Tienken, Ed.D. is an assistant professor of Education Administration at Seton Hall University where he teaches curriculum and instructional analysis to doctoral candidates. Previously in his career, Dr. Tienken had been an elementary school teacher, school principal, and school district superintendent. In his analytical papers and in presentations he makes around the country, Dr. Tienken gives a compelling, evidence-based explanation as to why the so-called U.S. educational crisis prior to Common Core was a statistical fabrication.

His research proves that American students were performing at or near the top in all required subjects in comparison with their international peers:19

No international academic test has ever been validated to represent the overall quality of schooling in any country.

The Program for International Student Assessment (PISA) states that when one student scores above another, “…it cannot be inferred that school or particular parts of the education in the first country are more effective than those in the second.”

When comparing international schools with the same level of poverty, less than 10%, the U.S. outscores the world in all areas of the PISA. (Perhaps we have a poverty problem and not an education problem.)

Even without adjusting for poverty, U.S. 4th graders ranked 8th and 7th in math and science out of 53 countries, on the Trends in International Math and Science Studies (TIMSS) test. U.S. 8th graders placed 7th and 9th out of 53. American students scored higher than 85% of all countries in the study.

(Hardly evidence of an educational crisis.)

The U.S. produces 289 IT and computer science degrees per one million people. In second place, India produces 104. China produces 270, but with a population of 1.5 billion.

Only 8 other countries produce more bachelor degrees than the U.S., and nearly all of them subsidize higher education. Of people between 25 and 64 with at least a bachelor’s degree in science or engineering, the U.S. is ranked 4th with 33%. In China, it’s 2%.20

Of the world’s 980 Nobel Prizes given for chemistry, economics, literature, medicine, peace, and physics, the U.S. has won 353. The U.K. is second with 125, followed by Germany with 105. China has won 9.21 As of 2015, the U.S. held 140,969 utility patents compared to the rest of the world at 157,438.

China held 7,244.22 Global Competitiveness Index: U.S. is ranked 3rd behind Switzerland and Singapore. China is 28th.23 Global Entrepreneur Index: U.S. ranks 1st. China ranks 60th.24 Global Creativity Index: U.S, ranks 2nd behind Australia. China ranks 62nd.25 Global Innovation Index: U.S. ranks 4th behind Switzerland, Sweden and the U.K. China ranks 25th.26

“There is extensive evidence suggesting that there is a real relationship between the complexity and sophistication of pretend play, and the emotional wellbeing of the child.”

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

Considering this small sampling of impressive achievements, it’s a mystery how anyone could have thought the U.S. educational system was inferior, or that its graduates were falling behind the rest of the world. It’s also important to know that all of the Americans who accomplished these great things were not educated under a standardized, one-size-fits-all, hyper-regimented curriculum that does not support a child’s individual creativity and innovative spirit. How can requiring our children to master a standardized curriculum prepare them to be the exemplary graphic designers, pastry chefs, engineers, teachers, airline pilots, doctors, architects, home health aides, lawyers, filmmakers and writers of tomorrow?

Imagination Imperative Creativity is crucial to the growth and progress of any society. Without creativity and innovation, we wouldn’t have any of the technological, medical, scientific or artistic advancements we enjoy today. According to the LEGO Foundation, which researches the importance of play in child education and development, CEOs regularly report that collaboration, imagination, innovation and exploration (all fundamental aspects of creative play) are lacking in the workforce today. 27 All human achievement begins in the imagination, which is why former university professor, education expert and author, Ken Robinson, stated in his now world famous TED Talk, Do Schools Kill Creativity? 28 that creativity is as important as literacy in education.

According to Robinson, “If you’re not prepared to be

The schoolification of early childhood, and all the rigors and responsibilities that come with it, are damaging to children because their minds and bodies are designed to learn and grow through unstructured creative play and exploration.

wrong, you’ll never come up with anything original.”

Prior to formal schooling, children are less afraid to make mistakes and are more willing to take chances. Once they enter the audit culture of school, where mistakes are stigmatized, their boundless imaginations and nonlinear thought processes are discouraged and ultimately curtailed. By instilling the fear of being wrong and putting pressure on children to conform to a standard approach to learning, we end up educating the creativity right out of them. By limiting creative innovation, we are not only harming our children, but we are condemning ourselves to a limited future.

In his presentation, Robinson cites a powerful study published in Breakpoint and Beyond 29 that tested 1,500 kindergarteners for divergent thinking, a nonlinear process that generates a multitude of creative approaches to solving problems. At age five, 98% of the children were determined to be at the genius level. By the time the same children were ten, 50% were still testing at the highest levels, but by age fifteen, virtually none were. It appears that perhaps geniuses aren’t actually a rarity, but that our system of education suppresses our natural capabilities.

Play in Primary Development Forcing young children into a rigorous academic program is damaging, not just because of the emotional and physical stress they experience, but because it goes directly against their social and psychological development. A child’s brain develops at a very rapid pace when the child is learning holistically through visual,

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

auditory, and kinesthetic inputs from experiences in his or her environment.

When the developing child is forced to use his or her brain in primarily analytic or abstract ways, his or her growth is compromised in other areas, particularly in the areas of problem-solving, social cooperation, emotional regulation and language development. Furthermore, many studies have shown that by the third or fourth grade, there is no difference in ability between children who learned to read at five and those who learned at seven. In fact, those who learned to read and were exposed to academics earlier had a poorer attitude toward school later.

As much as educrats would like us to believe that early schooling for young children is what’s best for them, an overwhelming amount of research going back to the 1920s, proves that the very opposite is true.

In a report titled, The Importance of Play,30 Dr. David Whitehead of the University of Cambridge compiled a voluminous amount of research studies for the Toy Industries of Europe (TIE) showing why a later start to formal education (by age six or seven) and unstructured creative play for young children is fundamental to their cognitive development and emotional wellbeing.

The research reveals that pretend play supports the understanding of symbols, particularly as they relate to literacy, more than direct instruction does.

Several longitudinal studies, including one from the British Department of Education, show that superior academic achievement, greater motivation and increased well-being are the results for children who had attended child-initiated, play-based preschools. Unstructured play, as opposed to work, gives children the freedom to focus on the means rather than the end, which is vital to developing problemsolving skills, higher order cognitive functions, and social-emotional skills.

process information more quickly, and children who are left to their own devices often engage in “private speech,” which they use to self-guide and self-regulate.

This “self-talk” has been shown to help children with challenges and problem-solving.

A study was performed in Germany in the 1970s, when the push was on to transform play-based kindergartens into early learning centers. Researchers followed fifty classes of children from kindergarten through the fourth grade. Half the classes were play-based, and half were academic. Children from the play-based programs excelled over their peers from the academic programs on all seventeen measures. Not only were they more advanced in reading and math, but they were better adjusted socially and emotionally. It was because of this study that Germany reversed its move toward early academics and made all kindergartens play-based.31

Intuition & Alternatives Hopefully the U.S., like Germany, will in time understand that its move to rush children younger than seven into early academics is counterintuitive, and will instead make play-based early education a priority once again. Nearly one hundred years ago, Rudolf Steiner, a German scholar of philosophy, anticipated this trend toward early academics and in response created a style of education that preserves the innocence of childhood while working with the child’s psycho-social development process in order to stimulate learning and promote growth.

“The mounting pressure to perform on recurring standardized tests has caused great anxiety in students at all grade levels, and resulted in a nationwide parentinitiated protest”

There is extensive evidence suggesting that there is a real relationship between the complexity and sophistication of pretend play, and the emotional wellbeing of the child. The lack of play is directly linked to increased indicators for the presence of stress and mental health problems. Rough and tumble play, artistic expression, role playing and engaging in games with rules, all have a crucial role in language development and the ability of the child to self-regulate cognitive and emotional processes.

Taken together, language ability and self-regulation are powerful predictors of academic achievement and wellbeing. Children who engage in symbolic play can

Known as the Waldorf Method, Steiner’s approach is based on a combination of educational and esoteric philosophies he collectively called anthroposophy. In the Waldorf School, the goal is to develop free but morally responsible individuals with a high degree of social competence and creative capability. In the early years, all learning is experienced through creative play, experimentation and storytelling, with lots of outdoor excursions to stay connected to nature. Students are encouraged to experience things first and then explain them in their own words and drawings instead of simply reading or being told about them.

This approach simultaneously engages the visual, auditory and kinesthetic ways in which children learn.

There are no books in these early years, only the books that students create for themselves based on what they’ve learned. Every lesson becomes a tangible,

61

“Instead of teaching the most common two or threestep algorithm to solve a math problem in the easiest and quickest way, Common Core requires children to use entirely different forms of counterintuitive calculations that often involve ten to fifteen or more additional steps to reach the same answer. “

hands-on experience. Children may learn about math, patterning and problem-solving by knitting socks, or learn fractions by cutting up food items. Sculpting, painting, weaving, pottery and other sorts of creative and physical activities are employed to make every lesson an engaging and dynamic experience in order to stimulate all areas of the child’s brain development.

All children are encouraged to play some sort of simple musical instrument, engage in freeform dance, spend time learning organic gardening and farming, and play non-competitive games. As the child grows, the curriculum expands accordingly to include reading, English language arts, literature, history, math and science. Students learn two foreign languages, which are introduced via storytelling and songs in the early years.

The length and order of classes change periodically to add additional variety to the school day.

Tests, homework, competition and letter grades do not come into play until approximately seventh grade in order to begin preparing students for college. Absolutely no computers are used in the classroom until the upper grades, as computers are viewed as an interference to spontaneous creativity. Multiple studies now show that just like the rush to early academic education, flooding classrooms with computers, doesn’t improve student performance.

After examining results from seventy countries, the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development stated that technology in the classroom “provided no noticeable improvement” for students, particularly in reading, math and science, and had raised “too many false hopes.”32 Even the largest teacher’s union in the U.S., the National Education Association (NEA), said, “Don’t believe the hype,” when it comes

62

to computers in the classroom engaging students, increasing motivation or helping them perform better.33 In an article published in The Huffington Post titled, “If we don’t let our children play, who will be the next Steve Jobs?”, the computer genius, who never advocated that children be exposed to hours of technology use, explains why free thinking and explorative outdoor play are essential for success.34 It’s not widely spoken about, but a large number of administrators at tech companies like Google, Yahoo, Apple, and others, send their children to the mostly tech-free Waldorf School in Silicon Valley!35

Letting Life Lead Even though some children will be able to read at a young age and grasp some of the concepts, we’re not doing them any favors by short circuiting their childhood and psycho-social development by introducing too much too soon. How can we expect them to love learning when we haven’t given them the chance to learn how to learn through their own natural creative play?

The real educational crisis we face is our compulsion to mold children into the products we think society needs rather than guiding them into the fullness of who they already are. Only a truly self-actualized human being can find their perfect path in life and fulfill the need in the world that they were uniquely created to meet. We can solve this real education crisis by getting our politics, money, technology and preconceived notions out of the way, and letting creative play, instinct and nature be the teachers for our young children. As Rudolf Steiner advised, “Receive the children in reverence, educate them in love, and send them forth in freedom.”

SOURCES (1) The New York State Education Department, New York State Prekindergarten Foundation for the Common Core, http://www.p12. nysed.gov/ciai/common_core_standards/pdfdocs/nyslsprek.pdf.

(2) Gonzales, Juan, (August 28, 2014), Full-day prekindergarten is set to launch in NYC, New York Daily News, http://www.nydailynews. com/new-york/education/full-day-prekindergarten-set-launch-nycarticle-1.1920966.

(3) Coulson, Andrew, (December 21, 2012), U.S. Government: “Our Head Start Program Doesn’t Work”, The CATO Institute, http://www. cato.org/blog/us-government-our-head-start-program-doesnt-work.

(4) Bassok, D., Latham, S. & Rorem, A. (2016). Is Kindergarten the New First Grade. AERA Open, 1(4), 1-31, doiI: 10.1177/2332858415616358.

(18) Singer, Alan, (April 7, 2016), “Thousand Refuse Common Core Testing, Calls for National Opt Out and Washington March”, http:// www.huffingtonpost.com/alan-singer/thousands-refuse-commonc_b_9631956.html.

(19) Tienken, Chris, presented at Stop Common Core in New York: The Real Facts on Common Core Forum, September 21, 2013, http:// stopccssinnys.com/Real_Facts_Forum.html.

(20) Center on International Education Benchmarking, Statistic of the Month: Engineering and science degree attainment by country, Percent of Population with Bachelor Degree 2010, http://www.ncee. org/2014/05/statistic-of-the-month-engineering-and-science-degreeattainment-by-country/.

(5) Brody, Leslie and Saul, Michael Howard, (April 8, 2015), “De Blasio Defends Full-Day Pre-K”, The Wall Street Journal, http://www.wsj. com/articles/de-blasio-defends-full-day-pre-k-1428540399?utm_ source=Master+Mailing+List&utm_campaign=78957ac5da-Rise_ Shine_4_9_2015&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_23e3b9695278957ac5da-75536661.

(21) World Atlas, Nobel Prize Winners by Country, updated September 19, 2016, http://www.worldatlas.com/articles/top-30-countries-withnobel-prize-winners.html.

(6) Brody, Leslie, (April 7, 2015), “As Full-Day Pre-K Takes Hold, Some Parents Plead for Half-Day Options”, The Wall Street Journal, http:// www.wsj.com/articles/as-full-day-pre-k-takes-hold-in-nyc-someparents-plead-for-half-day-options-1428439145.

(23) World Economic Forum, Competitiveness Rankings, Global Competitive Index, http://reports.weforum.org/globalcompetitiveness-report-2015-2016/competitiveness-rankings/.

(7) “The New First Grade: Too Much, Too Soon”, Newsweek, (September, 9, 2006), http://www.newsweek.com/new-first-gradetoo-much-too-soon-109667.

(8) Education Commission of the States, 50-State Comparison: State Kindergarten Policies, http://www.ecs.org/kindergarten-policies/.

(9) Hill, Charlotte, Help Children Succeed: Make Kindergarten Mandatory in All 50 States, Change.org, https://www.change.org/p/ help-children-succeed-make-kindergarten-mandatory-in-all-50states.

(10) Lu, Adrienne, (January, 13, 2014), “Push for Full-Day Kindergarten Grows”, USAToday, http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/ nation/2014/01/13/stateline-full-day-kindergarten/4455283/.

(11) Durkin, Erin, (April 29, 2013), “NYC School Day to Go as Late as 6pm”, New York Daily News, http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/ nyc-school-day-late-6-pm-article-1.1330698.

(12) Malik, Shiv, (September 12, 2013), “Early Schooling Damages Children’s Wellbeing, Experts Say”, The Guardian, https://www. theguardian.com/education/2013/sep/12/early-years-schoolingdamaging-wellbeing#comment-26907455.

(13) The New York State Education Department, New York State Prekindergarten Foundation for the Common Core, http://www.p12. nysed.gov/ciai/common_core_standards/pdfdocs/nyslsprek.pdf.

(14) Ramaswamy, Swapna, (April 16, 2015), ” 155,000 New York Kids Boycott Standardized Tests”, USAToday, http://www.usatoday. com/story/news/nation/2015/04/16/parents-opt-out-standardizedtests/25896607/.

(15) Singer, Alan, (April 7, 2016), “Thousand Refuse Common Core Testing, Calls for National Opt Out and Washington March”, http:// www.huffingtonpost.com/alan-singer/thousands-refuse-commonc_b_9631956.html.

(16) Arkansas Mother Obliterates Common Core in 4 Minutes, https:// www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZEGijN_8R0.

(17) Do the Math, Common Core Assignment Makes No Sense to Dad-Trouble with Schools, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ bVBm1miqNY.

(22) U.S. Patent and Trademark Office, Patents by Country, State and Year-Utility Patents, (December 2015), https://www.uspto.gov/ web/offices/ac/ido/oeip/taf/cst_utl.htm.

(24) Global Entrepreneurship and Development Institute, Global Entrepreneurship Index, https://thegedi.org/global-entrepreneurshipand-development-index/.

(25) Global Creativity Index 2015, Overall Rankings (Appendix 4), http://martinprosperity.org/content/the-global-creativity-index-2015/.

(26) World Intellectual Property Organization, Release of the Global Innovation Index 2016, http://www.wipo.int/econ_stat/en/economics/ gii/.

(27) Interview: Mirjam Shoening, Global Head of Programs and Partnerships, LEGO Foundation, (October 6, 2015), CNN, “Are we hurting kids at school?”, http://www.cnn.com/2015/10/06/opinions/ ochshorn-education-performance/index.html.

(28) Do Schools Kill Creativity?, http://sirkenrobinson.com/watch/.

(29) Land, George. Jamran, Beth. (1998). Breakpoint and beyond: mastering the future today. New York: Leadership 2000 Inc. (30) Whitebread, David, The Importance of Play, (April 2012), http:// www.importanceofplay.eu/IMG/pdf/dr_david_whitebread_-_the_ importance_of_play.pdf.

(31) Darling-Hammond, Linda and J. Snyder. 1992. “Curriculum Studies and the Traditions of Inquiry: The Scientific Tradition.” Edited by Philip W. Jackson. Handbook of Research on Curriculum. MacMillan. pp. 41-78.

(32) Coughlin, Sean, (September 15, 2015), “Computer so not improve pupil results, says OCED”, BBC News, http://www.bbc.com/news/ business-34174796.

(33) Walker, Tim, (January 8, 2015), “Technology in the Classroom: Don’t Believe the Hype”, neaToday, http://neatoday.org/2015/01/08/ technology-classroom-dont-believe-hype/.

(34) Hammond, Darrell, (October 20, 2011), “If we don’t let our children play, who will be the next Steve Jobs?”, The Huffington Post, http://www.huffingtonpost.com/darell-hammond/if-we-dontlet-our-children_b_1017485.html.

(35) Richtel, Matt, (October 22, 2011), “A Silicon Valley School that Doesn’t Compute” The New York Times, http://www.nytimes. com/2011/10/23/technology/at-waldorf-school-in-silicon-valleytechnology-can-wait.html?_r=2&src=me&ref=general.

63

By Dr. Habib Sadeghi & Dr. Sherry Sami

THE VALUE OF CURIOSITY IN THE PURSUIT OF HEALING hen faced with a physical challenge, the process of healing requires many things of us. In addition to taking the appropriate physical action by seeking medical attention, we’re also called to explore the underlying psycho-spiritual issues that affect us on a cellular and energetic level. It is here where we need to focus the majority of our attention, evaluating past and present emotional issues and relationships in an effort to discover the deeper root of the physical manifestation we call illness. It’s natural to be concerned about our physical bodies when we’re sick, but if we allow our attention to become consumed by what’s happening on the physical plane, we won’t be able to direct our awareness inward toward deeper levels of consciousness where the answer to healing exists. No problem was ever solved by working from the same level of consciousness that created it.

Healing also requires diligence, perseverance, courage, surrender, and a lot of other things from us, but there’s one quality that’s primary to all the rest. Without it, there is no return to health. Of all the things we must be in order to manifest healing, we must first be curious. This is not to imply that you should be combing through medical research online in an effort to find the magic bullet for your particular condition. Too often, this kind of behavior isn’t based in curiosity, but driven by anxiety and desperation. When we’re sending anxious and desperate energy out into the universe, it often returns to us through other situations that allow us to continue being anxious and depressed.

To be curious, with regard to healing, means to have a genuine desire to use the experience of illness to learn more about yourself. Children and animals are naturally curious. This curiosity is often free-spirited, light, and completely detached from whatever answers their explorations reveal. It’s just this sort of innocence and openness we must possess as we

64

Solving the riddle of dis-ease by properly evaluating ourselves

look inward to investigate, without judgment, the unresolved psycho-spiritual issues that have been the precursors of disease in our bodies.

By all means, follow the physical protocol your physician has prescribed for you, but beyond that, the bulk of your work is internal. As you take on this internal investigation, approach it as a mystery. Put your past and present relationships, regrets, grudges, disappointments, and assumptions under the magnifying glass. You’ll be surprised by what you find.

To be an expert investigator, you must take your time, never hurrying or allowing emotions to overwhelm you, so you can properly evaluate all the evidence and solve the riddle of your dis-ease. The greatest detectives of all time, like Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes, or Agatha Christie’s Ms. Jane Marple and Hercule Poirot always solved their mysteries because they approached each one, not with a sense of panic, but with a calm and collected sense of curiosity.

The dictionary defines curious as eager to know. It comes from the Latin, curiosus, and is “akin to cura, see cure.” Isn’t it amazing that the words curious and cure share a similar etymology and root source? It’s also interesting to note that online aggregate tabulators can measure the use of specific words in written and recorded language over time. Since 1800, the use of both curiosity and cure in the English language has dropped by nearly 75%. Is it any wonder why our world has become so cynical, lacking innocent curiosity, and of course, sick?

There are no coincidences in life. Everything is connected, and it’s quite obvious that in order to manifest a cure for your dis-ease, you must first possess a healthy curiosity for self-knowledge. Your eagerness to know shouldn’t stem from your rush to find a cure, but from a genuine desire to evolve emotionally and spiritually, out of which healing will manifest as a natural response.

OXYGEN/OZONE THERAPY IN DENTISTRY NATURE’S MIRACLE CURE BY

DR.

CYRUS

BANDARY

s it possible to treat infections with a naturally occurring substance that is truly broad-spectrum, non-toxic and without harmful side effects? The answer is yes. That substance is oxygen and its energized form, ozone.

produce either ozonated gas, water or oil for different purposes. So long as application of oxygen/ozone is proper and within the accepted standard of care, it can enhance the outcome in all aspects of dentistry.

For example:

One of the most complex problems in dentistry today is infection control. The oral cavity is a sea of microorganisms normally living in balance with the entire human body. Under certain conditions pathogenic or “disease causing” microorganisms can become the dominant life forms, thus creating an infection. These pathogenic microorganisms live together in what is called a biofilm. This biofilm supports mixed types of infection made up of bacteria, viruses, fungi and even parasites.

The difficulty is that each of these “disease causing” types needs a different drug to eliminate its dominance. What if we had an agent that could treat and eliminate the infection and, in addition support the surrounding healthy tissue without toxic side effects? We do now, with oxygen/ozone therapy for dentistry.

Research studies have led to the discovery that various properties of ozone make it an ideal inclusion in integrative therapies. Ozone, a powerful oxidizer, is capable of destroying parasites, viruses, fungi, and bacteria on contact. In comparison to other anti-bacterial agents, like chlorine, ozone is preferable since it is non-toxic and far more powerful. Recently, the International Academy of Medicine and Toxicology reviewed and recognized Oxygen/Ozone therapy in Dentistry as a scientifically valid treatment.

In a dental office an Ozone Machine Generator is used to

1

2

3

4

Cavitation and Dental Surgery: Irrigation of surgical site with ozone water and ozonated gas will speed healing, thus ozone water will be helpful for extraction and cavitational surgery and implant surgery.

Periodontal Diseases: Periodontal disease is a chronic gum and bone infection. By utilizing the different application forms of oxygen/ozone such as ozonated water, ozonated gas, and placing oxygen/ozone directly into the infected gum pockets, periodontal disease can be arrested without the use of pharmaceutical drugs and associated side effects.

Tooth Decay: Oxygen/Ozone Therapy also serves as an excellent disinfectant for teeth just prior to restoring them.

Tooth decay or caries, can be arrested almost immediately upon proper exposure to oxygen/ozone therapy.

Mouth Lesion: Any type of cold sore (ulcer or hepatic lesion) can be helped by a combination of ozonated gas, water and oil. For cold sores, ozonated olive oil will speed recovery. For apthous ulcers (cold sores) or any kind of sore in the mouth, rinsing with ozonated water will accelerate healing. The ozone will also help with the pain.

RESOURCES: International Academy of Oral Medicine and Toxicology (IAOMT), American College of Integrative Medicine and Dentistry (ACIMD).

T he Diaper Dilemma CONVENIENCE COMES WITH CAUTION WHEN USING DISPOSABLE DIAPERS

By Dr. Habib Sadeghi t’s easy to understand why the overwhelming majority of parents, daycare centers, and hospitals use disposable diapers rather than cloth diapers—convenience. The first tradeoff, however, comes with cost. According to Consumer Reports, parents using standard disposable diapers can expect to spend $2,500 or more by the time their child is potty trained. The second concern is the chemical toxins contained in disposable diapers that may pose a health risk to babies, particularly when these substances interact with the skin when the diapers become moist. Of course, there are some great choices of chemical free disposable diapers now, but these non-toxic, chlorine-free, biodegradable brands can easily add $1,000 more to the total cost, depending on the number of changes and chosen brand.1 Outside of convenience, and in spite of the cost, part of the appeal of disposable diapers lies in the misconception that cloth diapers don’t fit well, leak a lot, and involve safety pins and plastic pants. Fortunately, modern cloth diapers are nothing like those your grandmother or mother used. Snap and Velcro-type closures, pre-folded options, high-tech comfort fabrics, and even flushable liners have revolutionized the cloth diaper industry, so much so, that a recent survey by The Real Diaper Association showed sales of cloth diapers have increased by 30%.2 Because cloth diapers can be washed, and used over and over again, parents save thousands of dollars. They also don’t have to worry about exposing to their baby to harmful chemicals, and they’re helping the environment. Because of the synthetic materials used in manufacturing, it’s been estimated that it can take up to 500 years for one disposable diaper to decompose.3 Now multiply that by the number of changes a single baby requires prior to potty training, multiplied by the millions of babies in diapers right now, and you begin to understand the environmental impact involved.

67

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

Still, the debate rages on. Some say disposable diapers contribute to diaper rash because they allow the baby to stay in the diaper longer, but advocates say no, the super absorbent core draws moisture away from the baby and neutralizes the pH of urine, reducing rashes. Cloth advocates say that their children potty train sooner because they can actually feel when their diaper is soiled. In the end, the choice for all parents is going to come down to a combination of health awareness, cost, convenience, and how those things fit with their other personal priorities. For some, it might come down to using both, cloth at home and disposable for daycare and traveling. In the meantime, here’s a bit more information to help you work through your diaper dilemma.

Chemical Concerns A disposable diaper is basically composed of an inner lining made of polypropylene, sometimes with a bit of aloe and vitamin E, and a plastic waterproof outer layer. Between the inner and outer layers is a layer of fluff consisting of sodium polyacrylate, chemical crystals known as Super Absorbent Polymer or SAP, and pulp made from wood, corn, or wheat materials. The pulp distributes fluid, while the SAP soaks it up and draws it away from the baby. The globs you can feel in a full diaper are pockets of engorged SAP. Concerns with traditional disposable diapers include the following chemicals that make up one or more of these layers:

Dioxin A byproduct of the chlorine bleaching process that turns disposable diapers white, dioxin is so carcinogenic that it’s measured in parts per trillion.

It’s considered a persistent pollutant because once it’s introduced into the body or environment, it doesn’t break down but remains there for a very long time. It was implicated in toxic shock syndrome from tampons in the 1980s, and although amounts have been reduced, it still exists in feminine hygiene products today. A study from 2002 examined four diaper and four tampon brands and found trace amounts of dioxin in all samples.4 Regardless of the small amount, because a diaper comes into direct contact with the genital region, some parents see this as a concern.

Phthalates Chemicals used to make plastics more flexible, phthalates are classified as endocrine disruptors because they can mimic human hormones and send false signals all over the body. Used on the waterproof outer liner, phthalates are not chemically bound to their products and are often emitted into the air or leached into liquids leading to exposure through ingestion, inhalation, and dermal transfer. These chemicals are a specific danger to the developing nervous and reproductive

68

systems of babies, particularly because babies engage in constant hand-to-mouth behavior. A study of just three diaper brands showed that all emitted phthalates, causing respiratory problems or exacerbating asthma in children.5 Phthalates are also contained in the fragrance of disposable diapers and virtually all commercial products manufactured with a fragrance.

Tributyl-tin Also known as TBT, this toxic chemical is known to be an endocrine disruptor.

Sodium Polyacrylate (SAP): This super absorbent polymer is the secret ingredient of disposable diapers, but there is no consensus on whether or not it’s harmful. Only one study has linked it to urinary tract infections in girls,6 and some feel it contributes to rash only because it allows the diaper to be worn much longer than it should. SAP was removed from tampons in the 1980s because of the toxic shock syndrome outbreak and because it allowed the tampon to be worn much too long, contributing to bacteria overgrowth leading to higher toxic shock risk. Even if you choose a healthier disposable diaper, you won’t be able to avoid SAP. To do that, you’ll have to go with cloth.

Other studies have shown disposable diapers to emit xylene (endocrine disruptor), ethyl benzene (neurotoxin), styrene (carcinogen), and isopropylene (neurotoxin).7 The problem with getting the full story on disposable diapers is that manufacturers are not required to disclose their ingredients even though they are mandated to itemize the same substances when they are used in cosmetics and other personal care products.

“Whether you choose cloth diapers, a healthier or eco-friendly disposable, or a combination of both, making the change won’t just save you money, but a lot of unnecessary worry.”

Better Options For a healthier and safer disposable diaper, you may want to consider the options listed below. Keep in mind that a healthier alternative is going to cost a bit more depending on the size and quantity of the diaper.

Seventh Generation, Earth’s Best, Nurtured by Nature, 365 (Whole Foods Market brand): Natural ingredients (not synthetic), free of chlorine, fragrance, latex, dyes, and lotions.

Nature Babycare (Naty): Materials are free of TBT, fragrance, latex, chlorine, dyes, and lotions. Diapers contain all natural material and no plastic. Inner pulp is from non-GMO corn.

Bambo Nature: Certified free of chlorine, phthalates, TBT, heavy metals, formaldehyde, pigments, and PVC. 75% biodegradable.

Attitude: Chlorine and fragrance free, made from vegetable-based materials with bio-degradable inner shell and padding.

The Honest Company: Contains no chlorine, lotions, fragrances, phthalates, latex, PVC, heavy metals, TBT or harsh petrochemical additives.

Nature Babycare and Bambo Nature are very popular. All these brands can be found in stores and online, either through their own websites, or distributors like Amazon.com. You can find some good reviews of these diapers at retail websites, as well at babygearlab.com.

For Cloth Diapers, Consider These Respected Manufacturers Bumkins: Providing distinct designs in diapers, bibs, smocks, and more since 1989. Available online and at Target and Babies “R” Us stores.

Bummis: Started by three Montreal moms in the 1980s, offers one and two-piece diaper sets, training pants, and lots of accessories.

Fuzzi Bunz: Uses soft fleece in their diapers to ensure dryness.

Available at many retailers.

Happy Heiny: Indiana-based company that sells a wide range of sizes and accessories.

Kushies: Has been selling its patented cloth diapers for over 50 years.

SOURCES

There are many other cloth diaper and accessory manufacturers whose products are widely available in stores and online. You can find a wide selection at diapers.com. If you’re new to cloth diapering, you might want to visit The Real Diaper Association at realdiapers.org and allaboutclothdiapers. com for excellent explanations and lots of tips. Whether you choose cloth diapers, a healthier or eco-friendly disposable, or a combination of both, making the change won’t just save you money, but a lot of unnecessary worry when you finally resolve the diaper dilemma for yourself.

(1) Consumer Reports, Diaper Buying Guide, (M ay 2016), http://www.consumerreports.org/cro/diapers/buying-guide.htm.

(2) Ibid.

(3) French, Brittany, “Cloth 101: Cloth vs. Disposables”, Beyond the Diaper, (August 10, 2014), http://www.cottonbabies.com/blog/2014/08/cloth-diaper-basicscloth-vs-disposables.html.

(4) Devito, Michael. Schecter, Arnold. (2002). Exposure assessment to dioxins from the use of tampons and diapers. Environmental Health Perspectives. , 110(1), 23-28.

(5) Anderson, R. Anderson, J. (1999). Acute respiratory effects of diaper emissions. Archives of Environmental Health. , 54(5), 353-358.

(6) Fahimzad, A et al. (2010). Diaper type as a risk factor in urinary tract infection of children. Iranian Journal of Pediatrics. , 20(1), 97-100.

(7) Sharrat, Anna. (May 28, 2010). Disposable diapers: are they dangerous?. CBC News.

69

POTS, PANS & PEACE OF MIND CHOOSING THE RIGHT COOKWARE IS JUST AS IMPORTANT AS THE FOOD YOU PREPARE IN IT

By Dr. Habib Sadeghi

We all understand the importance of choosing healthy food for our families, but much of our effort can be undermined if we’re preparing it in certain kinds of cookware. Harmful toxins from the chemicals, metals, and glazes used in cookware can easily leach into our food and put our health at risk. Understanding just a few simple points about what to look for in cookware, as well as what to avoid, can help you make better choices so you can cook without concern.

ELIMINATE ALUMINUM

Solid aluminum cookware has been used for generations because of its excellent ability to conduct heat. You can recognize aluminum cookware because it has a dull, pale gray appearance. Another telltale sign of aluminum cookware is that it’s very lightweight; even a large pot will be easy to carry with one hand. The problem with aluminum cookware is that much research has shown that when heated, it leaches trace amounts of aluminum into food.1 This is a very serious concern because aluminum, like all heavy metals, is a neurotoxin, and accumulation over time can cause harm to the brain and nervous system. In fact, autopsies of the brains of Alzheimer’s patients often show an accumulation of aluminum. Acidic ingredients like tomatoes, tomato sauce, citrus juices, and vinegar react with the aluminum surface, making it easier for the metal to leach into food.2 This has even been shown to happen when aluminum foil comes into contact with acidic foods, for instance, when used as a covering for lasagna.

What has become more common today is cookware made from anodized aluminum. During anodization, cookware made from aluminum is exposed to a polymer infusion process that causes the metal to form a thick dark rigid coat of oxide that’s nearly black in color and makes the cookware considerably

70

heavier. Because of the polymer infusion, anodized cookware has a non-stick surface. It’s easy to mistake dark anodized cookware for cast iron or carbon steel, so be sure to read labels.

Manufacturers claim that the aluminum in anodized cookware does not leach into food because it is contained within the hard oxide coating. Because no independent tests have shown this to be true, and the risks of aluminum toxicity are so great, it’s recommended that all aluminum cookware of any kind be avoided, this includes disposable aluminum pie pans and those turkey baking tubs that show up in grocery stores every year at Thanksgiving. You’ll also want to avoid cooking anything inside aluminum foil, including potatoes. Yes, you can make a great baked potato without wrapping it in aluminum.

NON-STICK NO-NO

Get rid of your non-stick cookware.

Don’t panic. I can see you imagining yourself hovering over the sink for an hour, sweating bullets, as you chip off the black crust from the bottom of a cake pan. There are other ways to prevent food from sticking to cookware that aren’t harmful to your health and work just as well as a commercial non-stick surface. Coconut oil is a great choice, especially for stainless steel frying pans or for greasing baking dishes.

The original non-stick coating, Teflon, was created by DuPont in 1946 and has since branched off into similar non-stick surfaces by other names such as Silverstone, Tefal, Anolon, Circulon, and others. The main problem with Teflon is that it’s made with a chemical known as perfluorooctanoic acid (PFOA) or C8 in the manufacturing world. When cookware with Teflon is heated above 500oF, it releases PFOA fumes into the air.3 PFOA, just one chemical in a family of perfluorinated chemicals or PFCs, accumulates in the body and has been shown to cause

cancer, liver damage, and death in animal exposure testing.4 It’s also found in the inner bag lining of microwave popcorn, Stain Master carpet fibers and many other products.

The Environmental Protection Agency has created a voluntary program to phase out the use of PFOA in consumer products, in which DuPont has agreed to participate, and has asked the eight corporations that make the chemical to stop. In the meantime, DuPont has since been ordered to pay millions of dollars to three cancer patients in West Virginia and Southern Ohio, after a jury found the company had intentionally dumped PFOA into the Ohio River, contaminating the water supply of surrounding communities. In total, DuPont faces 3,500 additional lawsuits from local residents.5 People have been using cast iron cookware for hundreds of years, and although it’s very heavy to handle, it’s quite affordable. The problem lies in the fact any food cooked in cast iron cookware takes up trace amounts of iron. This is especially the case with tomato-based, citrus, vinegar, or other acidic ingredients. If you have a condition such as hemochromatosis, where the body accumulates excess iron instead of excreting it, you need to avoid cast iron cookware.

While it may not pose a danger to the rest of us, it’s important to understand that high levels of stored iron in the body is one of the strongest indicators of carotid artery disease - even more so than cholesterol6 - as well as heart disease and cancer.7

THE CAST IRON QUESTION

Cast iron cookware also needs to be “seasoned” by the owner, a process in which flaxseed oil is rubbed into the entire surface, not just the cooking surface, and baked in the oven for an hour.

The heat causes the flaxseed oil to polymerize or solidify among the iron, creating a natural, non-stick surface. The best results

are achieved if the cookware is seasoned at least three times.

Pre-seasoned cast iron cookware is widely available, but it’s almost entirely seasoned with soybean oil, which can cause thyroid problems, so it should be avoided.

Cast iron cookware should never be cleaned with soap to preserve the seasoned surface. Water and a clean cloth are enough. Wipe thoroughly to avoid rusting. If rust does appear, remove with coarse salt and water. You can find more detailed instructions on care and seasoning for cast iron cookware online. The best cast iron cookware is enameled both inside and out. This way, the food does not make contact with the metal. The downside is that it’s very expensive, but any pieces purchased, if cared for properly, will last a lifetime.

This cookware only weighs about half as much as cast iron, and is seasoned and cared for in exactly the same way. Avoid cooking acidic dishes containing tomatoes, citrus, or vinegar in both cast iron and carbon steel, as the food can taste slightly metallic afterward.

Once again, the better choice is enameled carbon steel, which prevents food from coming into contact with the metal. It’s widely available and provides no known risk. There’s also no seasoning to do.

CARBON STEEL CLARITY

As the most common cookware used today, stainless steel is the result of chromium being added to steel, an alloy of carbon and iron. Most often nickel and sometimes molybdenum are added, as well, to prevent pitting and damage from corrosion. Because stainless steel is a poor conductor of heat, nearly all cookware will have a

STAINLESS STEEL STATS

71

base added to the exterior of the bottom that contains either an aluminum or copper core encased in more stainless steel. Copper and aluminum are excellent conductors of heat, and being encased in a stainless steel core on the outside of the cookware at the bottom

PUTTING IT TOGETHER

prevents their toxic properties from leaching into food. Some stainless steel cookware may even have an exterior copper clad bottom.

The most common type of stainless steel cookware is the 18/10 gauge, meaning that its construction includes 18% chromium and 10% nickel. The 18 designation system, however, has recently been replaced by a 300 rating series where 316 is the same as the 18/10 that we’ve come to know. Although generally safe, there has been some concern about nickel and chromium leaching into food,8 particularly due to the use of acidic ingredients.9 A 2013 study published in the Journal of Agriculture and Food Chemistry showed that the risk increases with acidic dishes that cook for at least two hours or more. New cookware will leach the most, then level off after the sixth usage.10 You can purchase stainless steel cookware that does not contain any nickel. Under the old system, it was classified as 18/0. The downside is that it will be more prone to pitting, damage and corrosion, so it won’t last as long, but the upside is that it will cost a lot less.

An easy way to tell if stainless steel contains nickel is to use a magnet. Stainless steel is magnetic before nickel is added. If the magnet sticks to the pot or pan, you can be sure it contains no nickel, but if the magnet fails to attach, then it does contain nickel. Even so, all stainless steel will still contain chromium.

Perhaps the best thing to do to avoid leaching is to not cook acidic or tomato-based dishes in stainless steel and opt instead for an enamel-coated carbon steel or enamel-coated cast iron pot for those foods.

Glazed earthenware and ceramic ware are excellent choices for baking. Be careful, however, as the glaze used in some brands, especially if it’s made in China or Mexico, has been found to contain lead and cadmium. Always read manufacturer’s labels for pledges of quality construction. If you can’t find a lead-free, cadmium-free commitment in the manufacturer’s literature, then absolutely call the company and inquire.

WARY ABOUT CERAMIC WARE

NO GUESSING WITH GLASSWARE

72

There are no metals or glazes to worry about because there’s only one element used in its construction, glass. Be sure to use glassware for your loaf pans, pie pans, casserole dishes, 9x13, and 8x8 pans. Even consider replacing some of your stainless steel or ceramic mixing bowls with clear glass bowls.

Pyrex and Anchor Hocking both have an excellent line of quality products.

The hands-down, no worry, best choice for all bakeware is glassware.

In addition to glass bakeware, for the most efficient and safe set of cookware, you might want to consider enamel-coated, carbon steel baking sheets and roasting pans (Granite Ware), as well as frying pans, because glassware isn’t made for the stovetop. You’ll also be served well with an excellent set of high quality stainless steel pots and pans, with or without nickel, but be sure to never prepare acidic or tomatobased dishes in them. Always use an enamel-coated carbon steel or cast iron pot or Dutch oven for those foods.

Knowing what goes into your cookware, as well as your food, is what makes a healthy meal. By educating yourself and making the right choices, dinner won’t just bring pleasure to your palate, but peace to your mind.

SOURCES (1) Rajwanshi P, Singh V, Gupta MK, Dass S. Leaching of aluminium for cookware: A review. Environmental Geochemistry and Health;19 (1). 1997.

1-18.

(2) Gramiccioni L, Ingrao G, Milana MR, Santaroni P, Tomassi G. Aluminium levels in Italian diets and in selected foods from aluminium utensils. Food Addit Contam. 1996 Oct;13, (7):767-74.

(3) Powley CR, Michalczyk MJ, Kaiser MA, Buxton LW. Determination of perfluorooctanoic acid (PFOA) extractable from the surface of commercial cookware under simulated cooking conditions by LC/MS/MS. Analyst. 2005 Sep;130(9):1299-302.

(4) DeNoon, Daniel, (January 27, 2006), EPA Urges Teflon Chemical Ban, WebMD, http://www.webmd.com/news/20060127/epa-urges-teflon-chemicalban.

(5) Silverstein, Ken, (July 7, 2016), DuPont May Be Forced To Settle Chemical Lawsuits For Hundreds Of Millions,’ Insiders Say, Forbes, http://www.forbes.com/ sites/kensilverstein/2016/07/07/dupont-may-be-forced-to-settle-chemicallawsuits-for-hundreds-of-millions-insiders-say/#7c881e5f6d89.

(6) Kiechl, Aichner et al. (1994). Body iron stores and presence of carotid atherosclerosis. Results from the bruneck study. Arteriosclerosis and Thrombosis. 14(10), 1625-1630.

(7) Strain, JJ. (1994). Putative role of dietary trace elements in coronary heart disease and cancer. British Journal of Biomedical Science, 51(3), 241-251.

(8) Katz SA, Samitz MH. Leaching of nickel from stainless steel consumer commodities. Acta Derm Venereol. 1975;55(2):113-5.

(9) Agarwal P, Srivastava S, et al. Studies on leaching of Cr and Ni from stainless steel utensils in certain acids and in some Indian drinks. Sci Total Environ. 1997 Jul 1;199(3):271-5.

(10) Kamerund, Kristin et al. (2013). Stainless steel leaches nickel and chromium into foods during cooking. Journal of Agriculture and Food Chemistry. , 61(39), 9495-9501.

Dr. Bob’s

IMMUNE BOOSTING IV COCKTAIL No matter how healthy your lifestyle is, everyone can benefit greatly from IV immune enhancement, especially during cold and flu season. Dr. Bob’s Immune Boosting IV Cocktail was created by our own Harvard trained Dr. Bob Gross, and has been specifically formulated to increase immune protection against acute infections and treat fatigue. Containing a synergistic medley of highly bioavailable vitamins and minerals such as vitamin C, magnesium, calcium, B6, B12 and more, this formulation provides 10 times the amount of nutrition that could be absorbed when taken orally.

Because these powerful nutrients have been shown to possess pharmaceutical properties, IV treatment often provides dramatic results in preventing infection, as well as reducing the symptoms and duration of an illness. In fact, vitamin C levels in the IV cocktail have been shown to neutralize up to 72% of histamine caused by inflammation, which makes it excellent for allergy treatment.

Magnesium promotes the relaxation of the vascular and bronchial smooth muscles, making it a powerful intervention for bronchial asthma. When administered by IV, it’s much easier for magnesium to enter the mitochondria of the cell, providing more energy for patients, especially those suffering from congestive heart failure.

Dr. Bob’s Immune Boosting IV Cocktail has also shown excellent results in treating migraines, chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia, upper respiratory infections, chronic sinusitis, cardiovascular disease, and more. So there’s no need to fear getting infections this time of year, especially if you’ve got travel plans.

Stop in or make an appointment for a Dr. Bob’s Immune Boosting IV Cocktail and you’ll have your immunity insurance for a safe and healthy season.

5017 LEWIS RD. AGOURA HILLS, CA 91301

(818) 452-4483

74

VIRTUAL CHILD

Examining the impact of too much technology on children

BY DR. HABIB SADEGHI

hen ordinary cell phones turned into computers (smartphones), life as we knew it changed forever.

Now, with our mobile devices (including tablets), information, communication, and entertainment are available to us 24/7 wherever we go into our wireless world. Convenience has allowed mobile technology to permeate much of our personal and professional lives, so much so that many people spend more time staring down into the screen of a virtual world rather than looking up and living in the real one. Mobile technology is everywhere, permanently interwoven into the fabric of our lives, so it seems innocuous. Because of this effortless integration, we don’t notice when our use patterns have become a problem. But more importantly, even though research shows that this technology has a significant impact on physical and brain development, we are introducing our children to it at increasingly younger ages.

devices in front of their children at ever younger ages is because they believe the content or app they’re using is educational. Many schools have spent millions of dollars to put mobile devices into the hands of their students because they believe it will improve achievement. After years of doing so, however, the AAP states there is no evidence that shows technology either improves achievement or helps students learn better.

Parents are often fooled into buying devices or using onscreen programs for children ages 2 and younger because they’re told the content is educational and will give their child a head start in learning. The AAP has gone on record several times stating that there is no evidence to support such claims, particularly because children younger than 2 cannot understand the content being presented to them.

What’s far more important for children 2 and younger is unstructured playtime to develop creativity, problem-solving and reasoning skills, not to mention motor skills. Because of As educational and entertainment apps continue to this, unstructured playtime is far more important and essential proliferate, it seems that more children are tapping on touch to brain development than media exposure.5 screens at younger ages. Smartphones, notebooks, and Media usage and its effect on the brain is an issue for all toys with touchscreens are quickly replacing storybooks, children, because the brain continues to develop and grow playgrounds, baby dolls, and board games at such a pace until about age 21. Young children, especially those age 2 and that the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) has stated under, face a particular risk from media exposure because of that it’s concerned that the trend is changing the nature of the rapid neurological development happening during this time childhood. that causes the brain to triple in size. Throughout this crucial phase, In a recent research study, 60% brain development is determined of parents with children under 12 reported that their child plays on by environmental stimuli, or the a portable screen often, while 38% lack of it. Overstimulation from “A study by the research said their child plays very often. technology (TV, cell phones, iPads, Incredibly, 36% of children under 12 internet) has consistently shown consortium, Common have their own device.1 A study by to be associated with impaired Sense Media, found that the research consortium, Common learning, executive function 6 the use of gadgets like Sense Media, found that the use and attention deficit,7 increased of gadgets like smartphones and impulsivity, and cognitive delays.8 smartphones and tablets tablets by children younger than It’s also known that watching by children younger than eight jumped from 38% in 2011 to videos doesn’t really help young eight jumped from 38% 72% today, and that use by toddlers children learn to talk and may in in 2011 to 72% today, and rose from 10% to 38%.2 fact delay speech development because our brains are wired to According to the AAP’s most that use by toddlers rose learn from speech that’s spoken recent research, at 1 year of age, from 10% to 38%.” directly to us by parents and other one in seven toddlers are using people in our environment.9 a touch screen device for at least one hour per day. Some babies are In 2011, the World Health exposed to media gadgets as early Organization (WHO) classified cell as six months for 30 minutes at a phones and other wireless devices as Category 2B risks due to their time, and by age 2, most children are using touch screen devices for at least an hour per day. radiation emission, saying they were “possibly carcinogenic Usage increases with age. With regard to parents, 73% let to humans.”10 What makes this a bigger danger for children children play with mobile devices while they did household is that their brains and immune systems are still developing chores, and 60% did so while running errands. Nearly 65% while they’re using wireless devices, and their craniums are used touch screen devices to calm a child, and 29% to put thinner, which makes them more susceptible to EMF radiation than adults. Even so, that doesn’t stop many parents from a child to sleep.3 With such early introduction to mobile devices, children are propping up an iPad inches away from their baby’s face as thoroughly familiar with the technology by age seven, after he sits on the couch. For this reason, the University of Toronto which time usage begins to increase rapidly. According to the School of Public Health has requested that the WHO reclassify Kaiser Family Foundation, children between 8 and 18 spend wireless devices as 2A (probable carcinogens) with regard to an average of 7.5 hours per day or 53 hours per week staring children, and the AAP has petitioned the U.S. Federal at the screen of a mobile device. Contrast that with a report Communications Commission to review the matter. from the Nature Conservancy that shows preschoolers spend about 1.5 hours per day or 12 hours per week on a playground or outdoors, and one thing becomes clear, from about the As children get older and obtain their own mobile devices, age of 8, traditional play begins to disappear rather quickly.4 usage skyrockets and so do the problems. Hours of texting, One of the biggest reasons parents rush to put mobile Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, Snapchat, Pinterest, gaming, and

TODDLERS & TEXTS

BRAIN DRAIN

76

so on deprive a child’s brain of the crucial downtime needed for information processing and learning. Research from the University of California, San Francisco (UCSF) has shown that it’s only when the brain gets a break or sufficient downtime after having a new experience or exploring unfamiliar territory, that it can process that information in a way that creates a persistent memory of the experience. This process is essential to how we learn.

Loren Frank, a UCSF scientist specializing in learning and memory said, “Almost certainly, downtime lets the brain go over experiences it’s had, solidify them and turn them into permanent long-term memories,” and that when the brain is constantly stimulated, “you prevent this learning process.”

A study from the University of Michigan showed that people learned significantly more and retained more of what they learned after taking a walk in nature than they did after walking down a busy urban street with lots of traffic, construction, and overstimulation.11 This hyper-activation of the brain, particularly from the use of video games, prompted an Iowa State University study that showed 1 in 10 children between 8 and 18 are clinically addicted to gaming. The study used the criteria normally associated with gambling addiction, meaning that addiction isn’t just about playing a lot, but playing to the point where one or more of life are negatively affected, such as school performance and home life.12 In 2014, Psychology Today compiled no less than 16 international studies reviewing brain scans of internet and game-addicted teenagers that showed too much screen time leads to gray matter atrophy in areas involved with planning, prioritization, organization, impulse control, cognitive control, and emotional processing. There was also demonstrated loss of integrity in the brain’s white matter with diminished connections between hemispheres and reduced cortical thickness of the frontal lobe with cognitive impairment.13 Teenage drivers who’ve never read a physical map because they rely solely on GPS devices risk loss of their cognitive spatial relation capabilities. Every year it seems that helicopter rescue crews are plucking more lost hikers out of the wilderness because their GPS devices failed and they couldn’t find their way back using geographical and directional cues.14 Taxi drivers using GPS are experiencing the same kind of loss of ability.15

SOCIALIZATION , SLEEP & SIGHT As interaction with peers through texting, email, and social

media increases, a child’s social skills and ability to read social cues in others often decreases as media gradually replaces face-to-face interactions. The good news is that social skills can be restored with a reduction in media use. According to a study from the University of California, Los Angeles, students who attended a one-week camp with no access to media gadgets showed significant improvement in post-tests measuring their ability to read non-verbal cues and body language, and determine the emotional state of others.16 The hyper-excitement caused in the brain by staring into a backlit screen for many hours a day is now preventing children from falling asleep or sleeping well. Keeping neurons over-activated, even an hour before bedtime, by playing video games or answering email triggers the fight-or-flight response to some degree and generates the stress hormone, cortisol, which is hardly conducive to sleep. At the same time, the blue ray of the light spectrum emitted from the screens of media devices interacts with the hypothalamus by tricking it into thinking that it’s daylight, thus delaying the release of melatonin, the sleep-inducing hormone. When sleep is disrupted, the next day generally doesn’t go well, especially for children.

Excessive “close work” from activities such as reading and sewing has long been suspected as a major contributor to nearsightedness or myopia, the inability to bring distant objects into focus. Some people suspect that computers and mobile devices are the reason for the current dramatic increase of nearsightedness in the population. According to the Archives of Ophthalmology, about 25% of people in the U.S. ages 12-54 were nearsighted in the 1970’s. By 2004, it was 42%, an increase of 66% in barely 30 years.17 It’s probably not a coincidence that personal computers and later, mobile devices were introduced into society during this time frame.

Because that study is already 13 years old, it’s highly likely that the national nearsightedness rate is closer to 55% now, easily surpassing farsightedness as the most common visual problem.

In Asia, the problem is even worse. Just 60 years ago, only 10%-20% of Chinese people were nearsighted. As of 2016, 90% of teenagers and young adults were myopic. In Seoul, Korea, 96.5% of 19-year-old men are, as well. In East Asia, it’s estimated that 20% or 1 in 5 college students has severe myopia, which puts them at a very high risk of glaucoma, retinal detachment, cataracts, and blindness.18 CONTINUED

“The hyper-excitement caused in the brain by staring into a backlit screen for many hours a day is now preventing children from falling asleep or sleeping well.

Keeping neurons overactivated, even an hour before bedtime triggers the stress hormone, cortisol, which is hardly conducive to sleep.”

77

GADGET GUIDELINES In the last 10-12 years, the amount of research demonstrating how screen technology affects children, particularly with regard to attention deficit and other cognitive challenges, as well as physical changes to brain function and form, has been substantial. In response to this convincing evidence, the AAP, an organization of more than 60,000 primary care pediatricians, released official recommendations for screen time guidelines for children in 2013.19 They’re listed below with my additional recommendations.

Keep TV and all internet-connected devices out of your child’s bedroom.

Following just this recommendation can eliminate most of the screen related problems with children. It will also improve sleep quality.

Limit entertainment screen time for children under 18 to no more than two hours per day.

If your child is already displaying attention, learning or behavioral issues, consider even less.

Eliminate all media exposure to children age 2 and younger. I can’t argue here.

Monitor what social media your children are using and the websites they visit. Be sure you have access to your children’s accounts. Remember that the more devices they have, the harder it is to keep tabs on what they’re doing online and when, so avoid getting unneeded devices.

View TV, movies and videos with your children to assess the quality of content.

It’s not a bad idea to play each new video game with your child or at least supervise the first round of gameplay, as even games for young children can be deceptively violent or inappropriate in many ways.

Enforce a mealtime and bedtime curfew for all media devices, including cell phones.

Make a rule that children must hand in their cell phones 2-3 hours before bedtime to help their brains and bodies prepare for sleep. This also ensures children won’t be texting or surfing the internet into the wee hours. No matter how much they promise to not use their phones, children cannot self-regulate, so take this one seriously.

Establish a family media plan and be a good role model for your children.

Don’t expect your children to go along with these recommendations willingly if you’re answering emails from the dinner table. It will be easier and more encouraging if the whole family participates in the plan. You’ll all be healthier for it, too.

OPINIONS & OPTIONS It was sad but not a surprise that immediately after their release and for several years thereafter, the AAP’s media guidelines for children were attacked as “draconian” with equal amounts of rage and ridicule by the press. Common sense would say that there were probably lots of powerful technology and software corporations, as well as toy manufacturers, that didn’t like the idea of limiting screen time for children.

In spite of all the research, including its own studies, the AAP began to slowly back away from its own recommendations in 2015. At that time, they issued a more general list of recommendations like “increasing face time” with children and not using technology as an emotional pacifier.20 Gone was any reference to limiting children’s media use to a specific number of hours, and conspicuously absent was the recommendation that eliminated all media for children under 2. Their new recommendations were prefaced with the statement, “In a world where screen time is simply becoming ‘time,’ our policies must evolve or become obsolete.”21 So screen time now affects us no differently than the time we

78

spend doing anything else? Although the AAP insists it still stands by its original recommendations, it’s understandably confusing for parents when magazines like Fast Co. Design run an interview with AAP officials bearing the headline: “The American Academy of Pediatrics Says iPads Okay for Infants.”22 In the end, everyone must make their own choices with regard to how much influence they want wireless technology to hold in their lives and the lives of their children. Anyone over 40 remembers well the joy of an unplugged childhood that, with the exception of some occasional TV, contained absolutely no technology. We have data on countless generations demonstrating how children develop without mobile media, and I’d venture to say we all turned out just fine. The introduction of instant mobile online access from anywhere is still a relatively new phenomenon, and it won’t be for another 10 to 15 years that we see how adults who had a constantly plugged in childhood fare in the real world.

In the meantime, there’s no need to be a technophobe, but when you understand the science surrounding it all, you may conclude that taking a more old-fashioned approach might not be such a bad idea.

S O U R C E S (1) Matyszczyk, Chris. (February 22, 2014). Kids play with gadgets more than toys, study says. CNET, http://www.cnet.com/news/ kids-play-with-gadgets-more-than-toys-study-says/.

(2) Zero to Eight: Children’s media use in America 2013, Common Sense Media, https://www.commonsensemedia.org/research/ zero-to-eight-childrens-media-use-in-america-2013.

(3) Rideout, Victoria, et al, Generation M2: Media in the lives of 8 to 18-year-olds, (January 2010), Kaiser Family Foundation, https:// www.commonsensemedia.org/research/zero-to-eight-childrensmedia-use-in-america-2013.

(4) Kemp, Carla, Babies as Young as 6 Months Using Mobile Media, AAP News, Pediatric Academic Societies, PAS Meeting Update (April 25, 2015).

(5) D’arcy, Janice, (October 18, 2011), AAP Reaffirms No Screen Time for Children Even Though Few Parents Listen, The Washington Post.

(6) Christakis, D et al. (2012). Overstimulation of newborn mice leads to behavioral differences and deficits in cognitive performance.

Nature. 2(546), doi:10.1038/srep00546.

(7) Christakis, D et al. (2004). Early television exposure and subsequent attentional problems in children. Pediatrics. 113(4), 708-713.

(8) Pagani, Linda et al. (2010). Prospective associations between early childhood television exposure and academic, psychosocial, and physical well-being by middle childhood. Pediatrics. 164(5), 425-431.

(9) Dewar, Gwen. (2015). Baby talk 101: how infant-directed speech helps babies learn language. Parenting Science. http://www. parentingscience.com/baby-talk.html.

(10) Letter from the American Academy of Pediatrics to The Honorable Mignon Clyburn, Acting Commissioner, U.S. Federal Communications Commission, August 29, 2013. https://ecfsapi. fcc.gov/file/7520941318.pdf.

(11) Richtel, Matt. (2010). Digital devices deprive brain of needed downtime. The New York Times, http://www.nytimes. com/2010/08/25/technology/25brain.html?_r=0.

(12) Gentile, D. (2009). Pathological video-game use among youth ages 8 to 18: a national study. Psychological Science. 205(5), 594-602.

(13) Dunckley, Victoria. (February 27, 2014). Gray matters: too much screen time damages the brain. Psychology Today. , https://www. psychologytoday.com/blog/mental-wealth/201402/gray-matterstoo-much-screen-time-damages-the-brain.

(14) Bella, Rick. (June 11, 2010). Two hikers found after two-day search in Mt. Hood national forest. Oregon Live., http://www. oregonlive.com/clackamascounty/index.ssf/2010/06/two_hikers_ found_after_two-day.html.

(15) Frankenstein, Julia. (2012). Is GPS all in our heads? The New York Times, http://www.nytimes.com/2012/02/05/opinion/sunday/ is-gps-all-in-our-head.html?_r=2.

(16) Uhls, Yalda et al. (2014). Five days at outdoor education camp without screens improves preteen skills with nonverbal emotion cues. Computers in Human Behavior. 39(1), 387-392.

(17) Vitale, Susan et al. (2009). Increased prevalence of myopia in the united states between 1971-1972 and 1999-2004. Archives of Ophthalmology. 127(12), 1632-1639.

(18) Medaris Miller, Anna. (2014). Is nearsightedness an epidemic?.

Us news & world report, http://health.usnews.com/health-news/ health-wellness/articles/2014/12/01/is-nearsightedness-anepidemic.

(19) Dunckley, Victoria. (October 30, 2013). Pediatricians elaborate on screen guidelines. Psychology Today, https://www.psychologytoday. com/blog/mental-wealth/201310/pediatricians-elaborate-screenguidelines.

(20) Children and Media: Tips for Parents, American Academy of Pediatrics, https://www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-pressroom/Pages/Children-And-Media-Tips-For-Parents.aspx?nfstatus =401&nftoken=00000000-0000-0000-0000-000000000000&nfstatu sdescription=ERROR%3a+No+local+token.

(21) Shapiro, Jordan. (September 30, 2015). The American Academy of Pediatrics just changed their guidelines on kids and screen time.

Forbes. http://www.forbes.com/sites/jordanshapiro/2015/09/30/ the-american-academy-of-pediatrics-just-changed-their-guidelineson-kids-and-screen-time/#228509ba137c.

(22) Wilson, Mark. (October 21, 2015). The American Academy of Pediatrics says iPads are okay for infants. Fast Company Design. http://www.fastcodesign.com/3052029/the-american-academyof-pediatrics-says-ipads-are-ok-for-infants/.

BITS & BYTES MORE FACTS TO CONSIDER FOR LOGGING YOUR CHILDREN OFFLINE AND PLUGGING THEM INTO LIFE

Ask yourself, “What would my child be doing right now if he or she wasn’t on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, cruising the internet, or playing video games?” Probably being active.

Media causes us to be physically and mentally passive with a sedentary lifestyle, and fills us with ideas from someone else’s imagination.

Encourage physical and outdoor play that includes taking initiative, collaboration with others, improvisation, imagination, asking questions, and problem-solving.

Kids who get in touch with the real world become better stewards of it as adults.

Pacifying children with electronics trains them to shut off their feelings rather than helping them recognize and process their own emotions.

Does your child know the difference between a Facebook friend and a real friendship that requires compromise, mutual respect and confiding in one another?

Hit-and-run attacks via cyber bullying teach kids that they aren’t accountable for their words and actions.

9 out of 10 children between ages 8 and 16 play on average 13 hours of video games per week. The total is even higher for boys.

Nearly 1 in 4 children between ages 8 and 18 believe they are addicted to video games.

While video games utilize vision and hand/eye coordination, they do not stimulate the brain’s frontal lobe, which is vital for learning, memory, emotion, and behavior modulation.

Media trains us to prefer things short and quick. In other words, it trains us to have a short attention span and to deal in the superficial.

After a 70 country study, the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development and the National Education Association stated that technology, particularly in the classroom, provides “no noticeable improvement” in student learning or performance.

“OUR NEW STRENGTHS IN VISUAL SPATIAL INTELLIGENCE (FROM ONSCREEN TECHNOLOGIES) GOES HAND IN HAND WITH A WEAKENING OF OUR CAPACITIES FOR THE KIND OF DEEP PROCESSING THAT UNDERPINS MINDFUL KNOWLEDGE ACQUISITION, INDUCTIVE ANALYSIS, CRITICAL THINKING, IMAGINATION AND REFLECTION.” PATRICIA GREENFIELD, Developmental Psychologist, UCLA Muir, Maya, “Why limit electronics?” Media & Waldorf Education.

Coughlin, Sean, (September 15, 2015), “Computer so not improve pupil results, says OCED”, BBC News, http://www.bbc.com/news/business-34174796.

Walker, Tim, (January 8, 2015), “Technology in the Classroom: Don’t Believe the Hype”, neaToday, http://neatoday.org/2015/01/08/technology-classroom-dont-believe-hype/

Learning from Loss THE PERSONAL NATURE OF PROCESSING GRIEF

BY DR. SHERRY SAMI

I can still remember the death of my grandfather vividly. I was just 14, and this was the first time I’d experienced the death of anyone I personally knew, let alone someone with whom I’d had a particularly close relationship. While I was growing up, my grandfather always lived just one or two doors down from my family in the same duplex or triplex.

We were a family that looked out for each other, and because of that, he was always there when I needed him. It was his constant presence in my life that helped us develop a special bond that I know he treasured as much as I did.

Though I experienced profound sadness at his passing, the tears wouldn’t come. I just couldn’t cry.

Looking back now, I can see that it was my state of shock and disbelief that my grandfather was actually gone that kept me from fully expressing everything I was feeling. Instead, I felt overwhelmed by the reactions of the people who were at his funeral.

When a loved one passes away in the Persian culture, extreme expressions of grief are encouraged. At my grandfather’s memorial, people were crying hysterically, while others were beating their breasts in agony over their loss. Some even threw themselves over my grandfather’s body just as it was about to be lowered into the ground, weeping profusely from the pain of wanting to follow him on the

80

next part of the journey, while knowing that it was impossible.

In the midst of these dramatic displays of emotion, there I stood, equally traumatized by the experience in my own way, but completely dry-eyed. In fact, it was impossible to not notice the stark contrast between my behavior and the hyperemotional responses of nearly everyone else there. Instantly, I became self-conscious. I remember being afraid of what others would think of me when they noticed that my reaction was so different from theirs.

Would they assume I didn’t love my grandfather simply because I was having a different experience of his passing?

Fear gave way to anger and confusion as I began to feel pressured to express my pain in the same way all the others were. It seemed to me that the way I was processing my own grief wasn’t proper, and so I suffered under the weight of cultural expectations that dictated what the expression of grief should to be. Because ways of grieving are as varied as the number of people who experience it, to conform to

someone else’s idea of what grief looks like is to dishonor our own emotional process and ignore important issues that can only be fully resolved through our personal inner experience with grief.

Delayed Reactions I was still trying to adjust to life without my grandfather, when I moved to the U.S. one year after this death. I was in the middle of a whirlwind of change that was difficult to maneuver. While I was adjusting to the culture shock, and before we were really settled in, the news arrived that my other grandfather had passed away. I was also very close to him, and although the news of his death affected me deeply, I struggled to find opportunities to properly grieve the loss because trying to build and manage a new life in a new country demanded so much of my attention.

All of this became an emotional burden that threatened to overwhelm me at that young age.

Death came to visit again in my early 30s, when I lost several close friends

To conform to someone else's idea of what grief looks like is to dishonor our own emotional process and ignore important issues that can only be fully resolved through our personal inner experience with grief.

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

in the short span of five years. They were all around my age with nearly their whole lives in front of them. A few died from cancer and other illnesses, while one was taken suddenly in a car accident. When my best friend passed away from what was only described as unknown causes, it left me questioning everything I thought I knew about life. I felt trapped in grief so deep, I thought I would never recover.

At that time, I had just started dating Habib, the man who would become my husband. Because I felt that being grief-stricken might create difficulties in this new relationship, I suppressed my emotions and didn’t give myself the chance to fully process them when they came up. Later, on several occasions, I found myself having to pull off the highway because I was weeping uncontrollably, clearly needing to release the intense grief I could no longer hold down and that wouldn’t be denied.

I believe it’s because I hadn’t allowed myself the opportunity to fully express my emotions at the time of my best friend’s death, that the grief stayed with me for so many years. It wasn’t until I was studying for my Master’s Degree in Spiritual Psychology at the University of Santa Monica, almost a decade later, that something inside of me felt it was now safe for me to bear the full emotional weight of losing my dearest friend. Most importantly, I felt I could survive it. My class was given an assignment to write a letter to someone who was no longer in our lives and thank them for the gift of their presence in our lives. The letter to my best friend totaled 45 pages into which I poured all my sadness and feelings of loss to the extent that I became physically exhausted. At the same time, I experienced a subtle sense of joy that came from knowing I’d finally given myself the permission to move forward.

End of Life Lessons When my father passed away, I discovered what it means to grieve in peace without the torment that comes with an intense sense of loss or even regret. While I knew I would miss my father very much, I had a distinct sense that we’d accomplished everything we were meant to in our time together. He was, without question, the person I’ve

While everyone has a different way of grieving, it's important to work through it completely in a way that honors your own emotional process, as well as the memory of your loved one. been the closest to in my life. He always made himself available for me and listened in a way that was genuine and compassionate, and didn’t present a lot of cold advice about what I “should” be doing. His willingness to create opportunities for me to pour my heart out to him, without judging my feelings or choices, was invaluable in helping me find my way in life. During his eight-year battle with cancer, our roles became reversed and I had the honor of holding the space for him to pour his heart out to me. It was a blessing to witness him process a lifetime of achievement, and express appreciation and forgiveness. When he passed, it was because of that experience that my grief was tempered with a comforting sense of completeness.

Only four years later, my mother passed away from a rapidly progressing degenerative condition that no one saw coming. Not since I was 15 had I experienced so much emotional upheaval in my life coming from so many different directions. Not only had I recently given birth to my daughter, Hannah, but Habib and I were in the final stages of combining our businesses and moving them to another location. I remember being awestruck by the extreme shifts in

emotion I felt while simultaneously witnessing the power and vibrancy of the beginning of life with Hannah, and the peace and surrender at the end of life with my mother. It’s difficult to describe the wholeness of life I felt as I breastfed Hannah and then ran to the nursing home to feed my mom through a g-tube. When I was changing Hannah’s diaper, I couldn’t help but remember the last time I’d done the same for my mother.

Caring for my mother and daughter, two people with similar needs but at opposite ends of the life spectrum, left me with an indelible sense of how short a human existence really is. It cultivated within me the consciousness that everything, including trees, insects, animals, and even rocks and soil exist in a state of constant transition. To understand this intellectually is one thing, but to experience it in such a personal way has left me with a sense of life’s oneness that is almost impossible to describe. Every one of us is integral to this great cycle, and I know that my temporary body is just one part of this eternal journey.

I was present with my mother when she passed. For as many people as I’d lost in my life up to that point, this was my first experience of being with

81

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

someone at the moment they made their transition. Next to the births of my children, I can honestly say that the moment of my mother’s passing was one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever experienced. There was no suffering, just a distinct look of peaceful resolution that washed over her, making her appear younger, as if her wrinkles had faded away. The room felt charged, like there was a cocoon of higher energy holding her in its care until she made her final and full transition into it.

Opening to Empathy Barely 18 months after my mother passed away, Habib and I found ourselves dealing with the sudden death of his brother, Mehrdad.

Even though I’d only had a causal relationship with my brother-in-law for most of the years we’d known each other, he began confiding in me during his final months. Unfortunately, he was separated from his wife during this serious health crisis, which only

intensified the painful feelings he was experiencing and would pour out in our late night phone calls. He shared his vulnerabilities, as well as his ideas about God and the universe.

An hour before he died, I received a text message from him thanking me for showing him God, as he said, and for the opportunity to share his feelings with me. When I received the news of his passing, I experienced grief that was tempered with an understanding that making the decision to complete his own life was the best choice for him under those circumstances. Although Mehrdad is no longer with us in the physical world, I still experience his presence in many ways, such as when I’m meditating or making myself available for his grieving family. Yes, Mehrdad is still very much with us, and it’s because of my experience with my mother’s passing that I know Mehrdad’s transition isn’t the end of his journey.

Grief as a Gift While everyone has a different way of grieving, it’s important to work through it completely in a way that honors your own emotional process, as well as the memory of your loved one.

It’s only when we really know how to process grief that we can be of service to others in their moments of great loss. Learning how to grieve helps us cultivate compassion and understand how to be there when it counts, not just for ourselves, but for those we love, as well.

When loved ones pass on, there is certainly a profound sense of loss in the experience, but danger lies in allowing ourselves to be consumed by that sadness indefinitely. When we become trapped in grief, bitterness and self-pity have a way of taking over, causing us to ask, “Why me?” or get mad at the universe for our loss. It seems strange that it never dawns on anyone to ask, “Why not me?” Maybe this loss is a part of your path and leading to a greater gift that’s waiting for you on the other side of your grief.

Someone once said that if your heart has to be broken, then let it be broken open. It's only through an open heart that we can access our compassion and extend it to others. In this way, grief is an unlikely blessing and the parting gift all82loved ones leave behind.

Someone once said that if your heart has to be broken, then let it be broken open. It’s only through an open heart that we can access our compassion and extend it to others. In this way, grief is an unlikely blessing and the parting gift all loved ones leave behind.

GUIDANCE FOR PROCESSING GRIEF Consider these options if you’re having difficulty dealing with a recent loss

1

2 3

PURGE EMOTIONAL WRITING (PEW-12): Get a notebook and pen, and set a timer for twelve minutes. Start writing using a streamof-consciousness approach, in other words, write whatever comes forward without stopping to think or read what you’ve written.

Write down everything you wanted to say to this person but never got the chance to express. It doesn’t matter if it’s loving or angry.

Just be honest. If your emotions carry you away, keep writing. It doesn’t matter if your writing is legible. No one is going to read this. This is an exercise in emotional cleansing and creating closure for yourself. When finished, don’t read the letter. If the content is loving in nature, find a way to let go of it that’s symbolic and has meaning for you. Perhaps you could tie the note to a helium balloon of the person’s favorite color and let it float off into the distance, carrying your sorrow with it. If the letter is of an angry nature, consider burning it in a safe place like a fireplace, barbeque grill, or on a concrete patio. For thousands of years, fire has been revered for its transformative powers. Feel your pain dissolving as the pages disappear.

STAY CONNECTED: Be sure you have someone to talk to, whether it’s a family member, friend, or co-worker. A good therapist can be invaluable in helping to process grief.

4 5

DON’T AVOID: Stay conscious of whether you’re throwing yourself into work as a way to avoid processing your grief.

7 8 9 10

Your grief for what you’ve lost lift a mirror up to where you’re bravely working.

Expecting the worse, you look, and instead, here’s the joyful face you’ve been wanting to see.

Your hand opens and closes, and opens and closes.

If it were always a fist or always stretched open, you would be paralyzed.

Your deepest presence is in every small contracting and expanding, the two as beautifully balanced and coordinated as birdwings.

--Rumi

GET CREATIVE: Art is very healing because it’s an expression of what’s in our hearts. Paint a picture, create a drawing, compose music, or use any other talent you have to allow your grief to move through you. You don’t have to be an expert to reap the benefit of the healing power of art.

BE OF SERVICE: Volunteering or helping others is empowering and provides purpose and motivation in life.

6

BIRDWINGS

PUNCH IT OUT: If you’re angry with God, the healthcare system, or even the deceased, getting physical helps to discharge a lot of emotion. Beat your bed pillows with a tennis racquet, let loose on a punching bag, or smash a bunch of old dishes you don’t use anymore. Be vocal and feel the power that comes from your anger.

It will release the pain that’s hiding beneath your rage.

GET ORGANIZED: It’s easy for the details of life to fall by the wayside when grieving, but responsibilities must be met and bills still have to be paid. Be sure someone is in charge of these important affairs. Approach them in small amounts, and it will all get done.

JOURNAL: Starting a journal is an excellent way to help process what you’re feeling.

GET MOVING: Exercise generates endorphins in the body and can go a long way toward elevating your mood without you having to try to make yourself feel better.

MAKE A RITUAL: Rituals are a powerful way to create healing and closure. You might light a candle on certain days and at certain times to remind yourself that your loved one is with you. Plant flowers that return every spring in honor of their memory, or plant a tree.

Carry something with you that reminds you of your loved one, or get some friends together to celebrate their upcoming birthday.

FOR A NEW BEGINNING In out of the way places of the heart, where your thoughts never think to wonder, this beginning has been quietly forming, waiting until you were ready to emerge.

For a long time it has watched your desire, feeling the emptiness growing inside you, noticing how you willed yourself on, still unable to leave what you had outgrown.

It watched you play with the seduction of safety, and the gray promises that sameness whispered, heard the waves of turmoil rise and relent, wondered would you always live like this.

Then the delight, when your courage kindled, and out you stepped onto new ground.

Your eyes young again with energy and dream, a path of plenitude opening before you.

Though your destination is not yet clear, you can trust the promise of this opening: Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning that is at one with your life’s desire.

Awaken your spirit to adventure; hold nothing back; learn to find ease in risk; Soon you will be home in a new rhythm, for your soul senses the world that awaits you.

--John O’Donohue

EMANCIPATING EDUCATION Exploring the Freedom of Homeschooling

B Y

or the first 250 years, from the time of the earliest settlements in America, and for an additional 80 years after the U.S. Constitution was ratified, government schooling, as we know it today, did not exist. Nearly everyone was educated at home. Eventually, private schools did develop for students from wealthy families who planned to go to college in New England or Britain, but for the vast majority of the population, school was at home. In time and as populations grew, community-run schools, or oneroom schoolhouses, proliferated across the nation.

For nearly two thirds of America’s 410year history, there was no centralized system of federally funded compulsory schooling or standardized education of

84

any kind. During this period, a land was settled, a revolution was won, and a nation created that would grow into international prominence, producing citizens who would change the world with inventions like the lightbulb, airplane, telephone, and mass production of automobiles. America was thriving on home education and a largely decentralized network of private schools owned and operated by local communities.

In fact, literacy during this time was actually very high, estimated at 91-97% in the North and 81% in the South.1 MA N D ATE S & M OV E M E N TS It wasn’t until the 1850s when legislator, Horace Mann, known as the Father of America’s Public Schools, instituted compulsory education outside the home in state-sponsored schools with curriculum

D R .

H A B I B

S A D E G H I

oversight by the State of Massachusetts.

By the 1870s, all other existing states had adopted some form of Mann’s mandatory, state-run system. In 1918, the federal government required all children to attend at least elementary school outside the home. By the 1940s and ‘50s, the federal government was providing funding to state schools for classes in agriculture, industry, home economics, and other subjects. The U.S. Department of Education, as we know it today, didn’t exist as a standalone agency until 1980, by which time it was in control of all primary and secondary public education.

In 2010, a federally directed, standardized curriculum known as the Common Core State Standards was instituted nationwide, eliminating the last vestige of involvement states and local communities had in their public schools, and along with this, their

homeschooling legal. By the early 1990s, homeschooling was legal in all 50 states, and education had come home again.

O U T P A C I N G P U B L I C E D U C AT I O N Today, there are 2.3 million children in grades K-12 being educated at home in the United States, while the number continues to grow by 2%-3% per year.2 There are a lot of misconceptions about homeschooling, the greatest of which are that a home education is somehow inferior to a public school education, and that homeschooled students won’t be properly prepared for college. There is now research collected over several decades that refutes this misconception, and in fact shows that homeschooled students consistently outperform public school students in every subject at virtually every grade level, and even into college.

Test scores don’t lie. On average, homeschooled students regularly score 15-30 percentile points above public school students, who average in the 50th percentile, on standardized achievement tests. 3 The most comprehensive homeschool academic study ever completed included 11,739 homeschool students in all 50 states between 2007 and 2009 and drew from 15 independent testing services. Results showed that homeschool students who participated in the California Achievement Test, Iowa Tests of Basic Skills, and the Stanford Achievement Test scored an average of 37 percentile points above public school students.

ability to decide what material was to be taught and how it was to be presented. To date, only Texas, Virginia, Nebraska, and Alaska have rejected the standardization and maintained local control over their public school curriculum.

By the 1970s, educational theorists, John Holt and Raymond Moore, who saw government run institutionalized education as too rigid for many children, had begun a movement to re-introduce home schooling. To them, institutionalized education didn’t foster creativity or individuality, and emphasized rote memorization instead of personal growth.

Its inflexible, one-size-fits-all approach put certain students at a disadvantage because it didn’t acknowledge that children learn in different kinds of ways. Gaining wide popularity, the movement grew and in the 1980s many states instituted laws making

The homeschool to public school national average percentile scores were: reading (89/50), language arts (84/50), math (84/50) and science (89/50). The study titled, Progress Report 2009: Homeschool Academics, Achievement and Demographics conducted by the National Home Education Research Institute showed homeschooled boys scored in the 87th percentile and homeschooled girls in the 88th percentile.

If the children came from homes where both parents held college degrees, they scored in the 90th percentile. Considering this kind of performance, it’s interesting to note that the report showed public schools spend well over $10,000 per student per year, while the homeschool parent spends about $500 per child.4 Studies also show that homeschooled students consistently perform .5 to 2 grade levels above their public school counterparts and continue to outperform them in college.5 Not only do they graduate college at a higher rate, 66.7% compared

to 57.5%, but they earn higher grade point averages along the way.6,7 Many attribute the success of homeschooled students to the individually tailored and focused instruction style, creativity and flexibility in the curriculum and presentation, smaller class size, and fewer distractions.

In addition, their advantage in college is thought to arise from the independence and self-direction that’s built into home education. Since 1981, 23 large-scale research projects have been conducted on homeschool and public school student performance by independent agencies, state departments of education and local school districts. In all of them, the excellence of a home education is consistently confirmed when compared to the public system.8 Of course, Anna Meckel already knows this.

Every year, a handful of lucky students earn a perfect score on either the college entrance ACT or SAT exam. In 2014, only one student, Anna Meckel of Lincoln, Nebraska, earned a perfect score on both the ACT and SAT, and yes, she was homeschooled.9 To give you an idea of her achievement, less than one tenth of 1% of all students earn a perfect 36 on the ACT, while less than two tenths of 1% of all students earn a 2400 on the SAT. B E FORE YOU D ECI D E As rewarding as homeschooling can be for parent and child, it’s a big commitment.

Before jumping into homeschooling, it’s very important to understand why you want to homeschool. Parents choose homeschooling for many reasons.

Sometimes they’re unhappy with the public school curriculum or environment.

Others want more direct involvement in what and how their children learn. Some feel their children aren’t getting enough attention, and their children’s grades are reflecting that. Many parents prefer a religious education for their children, and homeschooling is much cheaper than parochial school. Military parents and those who are relocated frequently for their jobs may opt for homeschooling because it’s portable and they can maintain consistency for their children. In California, West Virginia, Mississippi, and Washington D.C., state legislation mandates vaccinations for all students entering public and private school, eliminating the previous exemptions for religious reasons or conscientious objection. In this situation, homeschooling is the only option left for parents holding to their convictions.

Another issue to consider is time.

85

“IT’S ALSO IMPORTANT TO UNDERSTAND THE FINANCIAL SIDE OF THINGS. HOMESCHOOL PARENTS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR ALL THEIR CHILD’S BOOKS, WORKBOOKS AND SUPPLIES, AS WELL AS THEIR OWN TEACHING MATERIALS.“

Homeschool runs on any schedule that works for you and your children. There is no mandate to mimic the public system at home. You get to determine when school is in session, how long it lasts, days off, length of holiday breaks, and even the length of your school year. However, you’ll still have to cover all the appropriate lessons, allot time for lesson planning, record keeping, buying supplies and attending homeschool support groups, co-ops and curriculum fairs, which aren’t mandatory but highly recommended. We’ll touch on those a bit later. While many homeschool teachers are stay-at-home moms, lots of parents have been able to manage it while still working part-time.

Because of these demands, it’s very important that time management, selfdirection, and organization be strong skills of homeschooling parents. Most states provide very little, to no oversight of homeschooling parents, and that’s by design. Parents have taken education into their hands to do it their own way, and all states now respect the legal right of parents to educate their children in whatever way they see fit. For example, after filing the necessary startup paperwork in California, the state plays no part in supervising activities, approving curriculum, reviewing grades, making visitations, or any other oversight. In Ohio, homeschooling is equally free, however, at the end of the school year, a portfolio of the child’s work must be reviewed by either a current teacher, retired teacher, tutor, or someone else agreed upon by the parent and the local school district. A letter is signed by this person and sent to the local school system superintendent. That’s it.

In both California and Ohio, homeschool

86

students are not required to take the highpressure standardized assessment tests that are issued at various grade levels in public school.

Organizational skills will also come into play when it’s time to set up the learning environment in your home. Some parents like to dedicate a specific learning area in the house to separate home and school life, while others prefer a more free-flowing style. A child might like to do his reading comprehension in his bedroom and his science on the back patio.

It’s also important to understand the financial side of things. Homeschool parents are responsible for all their child’s books, workbooks and supplies, as well as their own teaching materials. Costs can add up, but there are lots of tips and videos online regarding how to homeschool on a budget, as many parents do.

If none of these points are an issue for you, then go for it. The one thing that shouldn’t be stopping you if you really want to homeschool your child is self-doubt. The assumptions that educating a child is too complicated, that you’re not smart enough to do it, or that the public system offers a better education than you could provide are simply untrue. It’s no coincidence that the men of the enlightenment era and the geniuses of the industrial revolution received much or all of their education at home.

UND ERS TA N D I N G REQU I RE M E N TS The first step in homeschooling is to understand your state’s requirements.

You can find these on your State Board of Education’s website. In Ohio, a parent agrees to 900 hours of instruction per year.

A letter must be sent to the local school

superintendent saying your children will not attend public school but instead will be homeschooled. It’s appropriate to ask for copies of their records at that time. A similar letter must be sent to the superintendent each September confirming that your children will again be homeschooled for the current academic year. An additional letter is sent to the superintendent at the end of each academic year from an agreed upon party, such as a current or retired teacher or tutor who has reviewed the child’s year-end work portfolio, which is to be compiled by the parent.

In California, a private school affidavit must be filed yearly, notifying the State Department of Education that you intend to conduct school in your home. While this establishes you as a “private school,” it has no business or tax ramifications.

A letter must be sent to the local school district saying that your children will be attending another school. Parents are under no obligation to say their children are being homeschooled, but instead can say their children are attending a private school (which is true). Specific records must also be kept on file at home including the public school affidavit, attendance records, courses of study offered, faculty qualifications (your high school diploma), criminal records summaries (background check), immunization records or waivers and a health exam or waiver for children entering the first grade.

Each state is different, and requirements may change, so it’s best to revisit the education department’s website or belong to a homeschool support group for any updates. It’s also important to know that a college degree or teaching credential is not required to teach homeschool. In many

cases, there are no requirements for a parent’s educational background and in others, a high school diploma or GED will suffice.

C U R R IC U LU M C O UNTS After deciding to homeschool, the second biggest decision you’ll make is choosing your child’s curriculum. In addition to answering all your questions and keeping you abreast of any changes in your state requirements, this is where a local homeschool support group becomes absolutely essential.

Not only will you be deciding what you’ll teach your child, but the style in which it will be taught. There are many different curriculums for all subjects and grades

01

produced by professional educational publishers that cater to the different ways children learn. Does your child learn better through conversation or contemplation?

Is he tactile and project oriented, or more internal? Some curriculums like Charlotte Mason incorporate many different lessons into one activity. The Waldorf style introduces textbooks later while focusing on experiential learning in the early years.

The Textbook style is very similar to what most of us experienced in public school and is the method most new homeschool parents choose, at least for the first year or two.

There are many different choices, but as you become more aware of how your

children learn best and what they respond to, you’ll be able to tailor their learning experience to their needs. The best part is that you don’t need to teach every subject in one style. Perhaps a textbook approach is best for math, but your child really likes the Waldorf approach to science. It’s all up to you. Most new homeschool parents, however, choose a full system where all subjects are taught in one style with specific directions on which lessons to teach when and what assignments and tests to give. Once their confidence builds, lots of parents move away from these highly-structured systems to create a more personalized approach for their child.

UNDERSTAND YOUR NEEDS & GOALS.

CONTINUED

02

DON’T CHOOSE A CURRICULUM JUST BECAUSE A FRIEND IS USING IT.

Don’t purchase curriculum materials until you’ve thought through your needs and goals regarding what you want your child to learn, how you’d like him or her to progress and year end achievement goals.

Just because a friend has success with a particular curriculum doesn’t mean your children will respond to it the same way. Her children aren’t your children. Her goals aren’t your goals.

SUCCESSFUL HOMESCHOOLING

05

AVOIDING THESE

COMMON MISTAKES

WILL GO A LONG WAY TOWARD CHOOSING THE RIGHT CURRICULUM.

DON’T OVERSPEND.

SuccessfulHomeschooling.com

Many times, there’s no need to buy everything in a kit that a publisher is trying to sell you. Your homeschool support group can connect you with discount dealers and used book vendors.

DON’T BUY PRODUCTS THAT YOU HAVEN’T PERUSED.

04

Be sure to look at products physically so you can peruse all the materials. Curriculum fairs, homeschool retail locations and teacher supply stores are great opportunities to do this. Borrow materials from friends, and always read parent product reviews.

03 DON’T BE AFRAID TO DISCARD EXPERT ADVICE. Lots of people, mostly sales people, will tell you that the experts say this or that program is best for children in this or that grade. Only you are the expert on your children and their needs and abilities. Don’t buy anything just because the “experts” have endorsed it.

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

C ON N EC T IN G W I T H C O -O P S Separate from a homeschool support group is the homeschool co-op, which is a group of families that get together to achieve a common goal. That could be something as simple a planned field trip.

Others may meet regularly for several days each week to cover difficult material or a particular subject. In this case, one of the parents may serve as the teacher for the group or the parents might collectively pay an expert or tutor to teach the subject.

Whether it’s for academic or strictly social reasons, joining a homeschool co-op is also an important way to gain additional support, get questions answered and make things easier.

H AN D LIN G H I G H S C H O O L After the first year or two, most parents become much more confident in their new role as teacher. When their child is getting ready to make the transition to high school, however, some parents begin to panic, mostly about the idea of having to teach advanced math and science courses.

They feel that what their child needs is now beyond their knowledge, leading some parents to mistakenly stop home schooling and put their children in public high school. Not only is this often a jarring experience for the children, but it’s really not necessary.

A year before your child’s transition to high school, be sure to get your state’s high school requirements for graduation from your State Department of Education website. If college is part of your plan, you’ll want to contact your local high school or nearest university admissions office for the college preparatory requirements, and incorporate these courses into your child’s course of study for the next four years.

The curriculums created by homeschool educational publishers provide excellent instruction in advanced math and science courses, supplemented with DVDs and lots of online components. You don’t have to be an expert in these subjects. If your child has a question that you can’t answer, consider hiring a tutor on an as-needed basis, or having him or her take these courses in a coop environment. Online correspondence courses with an instructor or teacher’s aide can also work for these subjects, as well as foreign language courses. To save money, you might consider using widely popular and successful audio language programs like Rosetta Stone or Pimsleur.

Many curriculums and online advanced placement (AP) courses also allow students the opportunity to earn college credits while studying at home.

Along the way, keep very good records of the courses your child has taken, grades received, course credits earned, and calculated GPA. It is this information

that makes up your child’s high school transcript and will be submitted to colleges for admission. The diploma your child will receive will be generated and signed by you. Lots of great templates exist online and within various curriculum programs, so be sure it looks professional. All colleges and universities in the United States must accept diplomas and transcripts from homeschooled students and treat them with the same credibility as those from the public system. Some colleges have personnel who deal exclusively with homeschool applications, so this is nothing new for them. In some states like Ohio, the superintendent of the local school district can provide a letter of certification to go along with the homeschool diploma, but this is not necessary for college or employment of any kind.

It should also be noted that a 1998 amendment to the Higher Education Act made all federal financial aid available to students who, “complete a secondary education in a home school setting.” It also stated that, “college admissions should be determined based on the academic ability of a student, and not the accreditation status of the school in which he or she received secondary education,” and that homeschools “self-certify” their own diplomas. Assuming other criteria are met, homeschool students are also eligible for all scholarships.

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

S U C C ES S F U L S O C I A L I ZAT I O N Because detractors of homeschooling can’t attack it on the grounds that it provides a lesser education than the public system, they always say that children suffer from a lack of socialization. Somehow because they weren’t on the student council or didn’t get to go to the senior prom, they lack the ability to interact properly with others. Once again, nothing could be further from the truth.

It can be easily argued that homeschool students have more opportunities to socialize than their public school peers.

Homeschool students learn much more in far less time because their time isn’t consumed with things like home room announcements, study halls, recess, assemblies, fire drills, and so on. This leaves homeschool students freer during the day to socialize out in the community with adults and everyone else. Homeschool co-ops provide a great opportunity for homeschool students to interact with other children their age. Likewise, playing on sports teams through the community recreation board, and taking classes for dance, gymnastics, or taekwondo through the local YMCA, or anywhere else, provide endless opportunities for socialization.

Some people, like education author, Joe Kelly, say that homeschooled students are really better socialized and better behaved

because they’re not exposed to certain negative influences, or an environment that parents cannot control. “I know that sounds counterintuitive because they’re not around dozens or hundreds of other kids every day, but I would argue that’s why they’re better socialized,” Kelly says. “The socialization thing is really a nonissue for most home schoolers. They’re getting a lot of it.”10

Home School Legal Defense Association hslda.org

The Homeschool Mom thehomeschoolmom.com

S H API N G TH E FU TU RE Education is one of the primary responsibilities of raising a child. How we choose to educate our children will shape the future world we will all live in.

It’s clear that homeschool is an excellent method for parents who have the ability to educate their children in a more holistic and personal way that will benefit them well into adulthood. If you face any of the educational challenges mentioned earlier, perhaps this article has taken some of the mystery out of homeschooling and made it a viable option for you. When it comes to how your child is educated, you have far more power than you think you do, and you’re smarter than you think you are.

In the meantime, consider these excellent resources for homeschool startup information, research studies, understanding your legal rights, curriculum choices and reviews, locations of support groups, co-op connections, and more:

“HOMESCHOOL STUDENTS LEARN MUCH MORE IN FAR LESS TIME BECAUSE THEIR TIME ISN’T CONSUMED WITH THINGS LIKE HOME ROOM ANNOUNCEMENTS, STUDY HALLS, RECESS, ASSEMBLIES, FIRE DRILLS, AND SO ON.“

Successful Homeschooling successfulhomeschooling.com

Sources (1) How did the government get so involved in education? (January 29, 2008), The Alliance for the Separation of School and State, http:// schoolandstate.org/Case/case1.htm.

(2) Ray, Brian, (March 23, 2016), Research Facts on Homeschooling, National Home Education Research Institute, http://www.nheri.org/ research/research-facts-on-homeschooling. html.

(3) Ibid.

(4) Unruh, Bob. (August 11, 2009).

Study: homeschoolers score 37 points higher. WolrdNet Daily, http://www.wnd. com/2009/08/106585/.

(5) Martin-Chang, Sandra et al. (2011). The impact of schooling on academic achievement: evidence from homeschooled and traditionally schooled student. Canadian Journal of Behavioral Science., 43(3), 195-202.

(6) Cogen, Michael, Exploring Academic Outcomes of Homeschooled Students, University of St. Thomas, AIRUM 2009, http://i. bnet.com/blogs/homeschool.pdf.

(7) Sheehy, Kelsey. (June 1, 2012).

Homeschooled students well-prepared for college, study finds. The Huffington Post. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/01/ homeschooled-students-wel_n_1562425.html.

(8) Academic Statistics on Homeschooling, Legal Research Supplement, (October 22,2004), Home School Legal Defense Association, http://www.hslda.org/docs/ nche/000010/200410250.asp.

(9) Connors, Mark. (May 4, 2014). Homeschooled Nebraska senior tallies perfect SAT, ACT scores. CT Homeschool Network. http:// cthomeschoolnetwork.org/homeschoolednebraska-senior-tallies-perfect-sat-actscores/.

(10) Sheehy, Kelsey. (June 1, 2012).

Homeschooled students well-prepared for college, study finds. The Huffington Post. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/01/ homeschooled-students-wel_n_1562425.html.

89

THE TOXIC LEECHING OF NUTRIENTS How toxins provide a helping hand in our nutritional deficiencies Dr. Habib Sadeghi

ot long ago, a patient of mine found himself in an urgent care center. He wanted a doctor to examine a bug bite near his ankle that had become quite nasty looking over the course of several days. Luckily, he was told that the bite was nothing to worry about and that there was no infection.

What was concerning was the rather pointed and unsolicited speech he received from the attending physician about how vitamin and mineral supplements don’t work and why he thought they were a money-making scam. This came in response to the patient’s disclosure under the current medications category on the intake form that he was taking a few different supplements.

Happily, the patient healed just fine, and in spite of the unwanted advice, he continues to take his supplements, which he feels are very effective for preventative and longevity purposes. After hearing about his experience, I wanted to take this opportunity to provide you with yet another powerful example of how supplements not only support health, but actually reverse disease in some cases.

Early in my medical education, my intention was to become a neuro-ophthalmologist. Unlike an optometrist, a neuroophthalmologist works with and performs surgery on all structures inside and behind the eye. While on sabbatical from Western University of Health Sciences, I applied for a research grant from Prevent Blindness America and gained the opportunity to work in the lab of one of the most respected pioneers in the field of ophthalmology, Dr. Stephen Ryan, at the Keck School of Medicine at the University of Southern California (USC). Together, Dr. Ryan and I would publish our work in the journal, Association of Research in Vision and Ophthalmology (ARVO). It was also through my association with Dr. Ryan that I would eventually be recruited by one of the luminaries in the field, former Chairman of the Doheny Eye Institute, Alfredo Sadun, MD, PhD. During my time with him, Dr. Sadun shared an amazing story with me, which he’d previously been invited to present at the California Institute of Technology.

In the early 1990s, Dr. Sadun had been recruited by the U.S. government to travel to Cuba to investigate an unexplained epidemic of blindness. Physicians from the World Health Organization (WHO) believed the mass affliction was caused by a virus. Because the Florida coast is only 90 miles from Cuba, the U.S. had a vested interest in finding a cure and preventing the pathogen from creating a problem at home. At the same time, Sadun’s visit was part foreign relations, because the Cuban government was blaming the epidemic on the U.S., calling it a clandestine attack on their people. The reason for this accusation was the fact that the vast majority of people suffering from this unexplained blindness

90

“Living in a nutrient-deficient state leads to the creation of what I call the pre-critical terrain. It’s a biological landscape that has been so weakened by deficiencies that, although it doesn’t have cancer or some other chronic disease yet, it will only take some minor catalyst to create it.” were concentrated on the western side of the island, near Havana. The U.S. military base at Guantanamo Bay is on the far eastern shore, and near the base, and for many miles around it, no one had been affected.

Upon examining those who were blinded, Dr. Sadun noticed that without exception, they were all severely deficient in vitamins B12, B6, and folic acid. A deficiency of this magnitude involving these specific vitamins would certainly lead to atrophy of the optic nerve and loss of sight. It didn’t take Dr. Sadun long to realize the epidemic wasn’t caused by a virus or a governmentsponsored attack. However, he knew that discovering the cause of the deficiency, one monumental enough to affect tens of thousands of people, would require a bit more work.

At a briefing of WHO physicians in Havana, Dr. Sadun shared his findings, which were met with skepticism. The doctors insisted that the epidemic had to be caused by a virus because of how widespread it was and because of the fact that Dr. Sadun couldn’t provide a cause for the deficiencies. While the meeting was still in progress, Dr. Sadun was tapped on the shoulder by an unidentified man who asked to see him privately. Stepping out of the room, Dr. Sadun followed the man who said nothing more but led him around the corner and into another room.

There, sitting at a desk, watching the entire debriefing session from behind a one-way mirror, was Fidel Castro. Dr. Sadun was invited to sit down as Castro explained that he understood Sadun’s deficiency theory and believed it was the true cause of the blindness epidemic. From that moment on, Dr. Sadun was ordered not to report back to the committee, but directly to Castro.

Soon, Dr. Sadun discovered that about a year prior to the outbreak of the epidemic, a new factory for bootleg rum had begun production on the western side of the island. Methanol or wood alcohol is an organic solvent that’s used in industrial products. Unfortunately, it’s also found

in poorly adulterated alcoholic beverages from manufacturers in developing countries. One of the side effects of methanol exposure is the leeching of vitamins B12, B6, and folic acid from the body, leading to blindness and even death.

Needless to say, Dr. Sadun had solved this international mystery. After implementing a nutrition program supplemented with high doses of all the necessary vitamins, the affected people completely recovered their eyesight.

There are many toxins like methanol in our environment, and even our food that have the same leeching effect on the crucial nutrients our bodies need. Living in a nutrient-deficient state leads to the creation of what I call the pre-critical terrain. It’s a biological landscape that has been so weakened by deficiencies that, although it doesn’t have cancer or some other chronic disease yet, it will only take some minor catalyst to create it. This can easily be the emotional stress that comes from a divorce, loss of a job, or some other unexpected life trauma. The physiological and chemical changes that come with stress can easily produce cancer in a body that has been primed for disease because it has lost its buffering capacity due to nutritional deficiencies.

This is why maintaining a regular detoxification regimen is so important.

Toxins leech nutrients, which diminishes our buffering capacity for disease. Sadly, most people are unaware of the deficiencies caused by toxins in their bodies, and then disease just seems to arrive “out of the blue” one day. This is why I urge all my patients to establish at least a seasonal detoxification routine that works for them. We provide several options here at Be Hive of Healing, and you don’t have to wait until you’re feeling symptoms to take advantage of them. Detoxification is the most important kind of health prevention.

It will help you maintain maximum buffering capacity to ward off disease, and just maybe a doctor or two who thinks vitamins and minerals don’t heal.

91

WHAT

LOVE BUTTON HONORS ILLUSIONIST

P.104 LOVE BUTTON HOSTS AN EVENT AT THE UNIVERSITY OF SANTA MONICA

P.106

OUR MISSION AND VISION

P.94 WHAT IS THE LOVE BUTTON MOVEMENT?

P.95

LOVE BUTTON AT THE LOS ANGELES WOMEN’S MARCH

#PAUSEANDLOVE SOCIAL MOVEMENT

P.102

HOW YOUR DONATIONS HELP

P.96 LOVE BUTTONS ARRIVED IN VENEZUELA

P.98

TAKING A CLOSER LOOK AT THE GRASSROOTS NONPROFIT ORGANIZATION THAT’S FASHIONABLY REMINDING EVERYONE TO PAUSE AND LOVE.

92

P.97

LOVE BUTTON HONORS CREATING HOPE FOUNDATION

P.99 COLDPLAY CONCERT AND LOVE BUTTON

P.108 WHEN LOVE IS NEEDED MOST - ANNUAL HIGHLIGHTS

P.112

LOVE BUTTON SUPPORTS AMERICAN CANCER SOCIETY DREAMBALL AFTER DARK

P.100 LOVE BUTTON SUPPORTS FAN FEST ORLANDO

P.101 LOVE BUTTON THROWS A SURPISE BIRTHDAY PARTY FOR JAVIER BARDEM

P.109

PLUS: HIGHLIGHTS FROM THE YEAR’S BEST CAMPAIGNS, EVENTS, AND PARTNERSHIPS FOR THE LOVE BUTTON GLOBAL MOVEMENT

P H O T O C R E D I T: I N S TA G R A M U S E R @ FA R I D R O D R I G U E Z 2

OUR MISSION

The Love Button Global Movement fosters loving acts of kindness, collaborating with organizations and individuals who transform and uplift the lives of our human family. We support initiatives ranging from intimate local efforts to global programs that promote physical and mental health, nurture education and cultivate loving action through our “Love Is” Dandelion Initiative.

OUR VISION

A world where people are inspired to increase community-based philanthropy, volunteerism and individual acts of kindness among themselves to foster a greater sense of mutual support, connectedness and interdependence that’s essential for society to function in a more cohesive and loving way.

94

WHAT IS

the Love Button Movement?

The Love Button symbolizes the power of love to ignite a global conversation in healing our world.

Founded by Dr. Habib Sadeghi and Dr. Sherry Sami, the Love Button Global Movement fosters loving acts of kindness, collaborating with organizations and individuals who transform and uplift the lives of our human family. The funds we raise are used to support initiatives ranging from intimate local efforts to global programs that promote physical and mental health, nurture education and cultivate loving action through our “Love Is” Dandelion Initiative.

OUR KEY FOCUS AREAS

EDUCATION & EMPOWERMENT Parent Workshops Endowments Super Soul Teachers Award

PHYSICAL & MENTAL HEALTH Homeless Outreach Prison Projects

“LOVE IS” DANDELION INITIATIVE Wordwide Events to Cultivate Loving Action Ambassador Program

TOGETHER, WE ARE HEALING OUR WORLD. L E A R N M O R E AT LO V E B U T TO N .O R G

95

HOW

Your Donations Help The Love Button Global Movement partners with and supports many incredible organizations.

We collaborate with local, national and international nonprofit organizations to uplift the lives of people affected by trauma and to heal individual lives through love. All proceeds from your purchase of Love Buttons or any Love Button product goes toward helping these organizations and others like them heal the world through their various humanitarian missions.

96

U.S. Fund for UNICEF

Doctors Without Borders

Preventing children from being recruited into terrorist organizations in the Middle East and providing intervention services for those fortunate enough to escape such circumstances.

Supporting over 30,000 medical professionals and water quality specialists working everyday in over 70 countries, to improve the lives of millions in impoverished areas of the world.

https://www.unicefusa.org/

http://www.doctorswithoutborders.org/

Global Citizen

The Cave of Adullam

Raising awareness and funds for infrastructure and food access improvement across the world, while commitments are secured from governments, corporations and the public at large to address these concerns.

Providing boys from fatherless homes in Detroit with discipline through martial arts training, mentorship and spiritual guidance to avoid gang culture and achieve their true potential.

https://www.globalcitizen.org

https://thecaveofadullam.org/

Moira Kelly’s Creating Hope Foundation

Look Good Feel Better Program

Working strictly from donations, this organization brings children to Australia for profoundly life-changing or life-saving surgery that is not available in their home countries.

Partnering with the beauty industry to raise funds to provide people struggling with the appearance challenges related to cancer treatment with free professional services in hair, makeup, wardrobe and accessories.

http://www.creatinghopefoundation.org.au/

http://tiny.cc/dreamball

L E A R N M O R E AT LO V E B U T TO N . O R G

PHOTO : INSTAGRAM @ EXTRAALUCIDE

PHOTO : INSTAGRAM @M_RBMNL

WHERE Love Inspired Action

Love Button Global Movement had a busy year spreading love around the world with some amazing people. Here are some highlights:

Love Buttons Arrived in Venezuela Venezuela is passing through a difficult moment and the people of this beautiful country are suffering a lot. Because of the economic problems we are facing, it is very difficult to find products such as food, cleaning supplies, medicines, and even diapers for babies. And if the products are found, they are usually extremely expensive and very few people have the means to buy them.

We believe with all our hearts in sweet and pure love. The love that connects us all. Which is why a group of people went to the Santa Ana public maternity hospital in Caracas, where many loving moms suffering from economic problems go to have their babies. This group of people went there to offer diapers to all the moms in the name of LOVE. These pure souls full of light coming into this world need our help. It is difficult to change the situation in this country. But the ocean is made from many drops of water, which is why together we can make this world a better place.

Let’s keep sharing love!! Thank you so much, Glenda, Ricardo, Fatima, and Dani

98

Love Button Honors Creating Hope Foundation

While passing through Australia on his band’s world tour, Chris Martin of Coldplay decided to stop by and make a surprise visit to honor Moira Kelly and The Moira Kelly Creating Hope Foundation for all the wonderful work they’ve been doing to make a difference in the lives of disadvantaged children and their families.

Learn more about Moira Kelly’s Creating Hope Foundation by visiting: http://www. creatinghopefoundation. org.au/

The Moira Kelly Creating Hope Foundation builds on Moira’s decades of work caring for sick and needy children and their families, and now aims to provide comfort, protection and safety to children and families who need it most. Moira is renowned for her work bringing children with serious health problems to Australia for life-saving procedures, and her Foundation continues this work by supporting children and families in Australia and overseas who have been refused help elsewhere. “There’s no saying no to hope,” according to Moira, so with the help of charitable donations, she is taking on medical causes to which many others have said no. Because the Moira Kelly Creating Hope Foundation brings so much love into the lives of sick children and their families in such a profound way, the Love Button Global Movement continues to be a proud supporter of their efforts and mission.

As an ambassador for the Love Button Global Movement, Chris Martin stopped in to officially honor Moira Kelly for her work during Coldplay’s scheduled concert stop in Melbourne. As an added surprise, Chris offered Moira’s son, Emmanuel, the opportunity to perform John Lennon’s classic song, Imagine, live on stage in front of 55,000 people during the second night of the show. Chris had heard that the song was very special to Emmanuel, who gained fame after singing it as a contestant on the Australian X Factor TV show a few years earlier.

While most would have been intimidated by such an offer, Emmanuel jumped at the chance, calling it a “dream come true” and the perfect opportunity to honor his mom. The 22-year-old has more than the usual reasons to be grateful to Moira Kelly. He originally came to her as a young boy suffering from underdeveloped limbs due to chemical warfare in his home country of Iraq. Little did either of them know at the time that their bond would grow so strong that Emmanuel would never return to Iraq because he would soon be adopted by Moira and given a new life in a new land. These days there’s no need for Emmanuel to imagine what happiness is like because he’s living it.

99

PHOTO CREDIT: BILLY FARRELL AGENCY

Learn more about Dreamball and its supporters by visiting: https://acsmnhtn. ejoinme.org/dreamball

Love Button Supports American Cancer Society Dream Ball After Dark On September 28th, the Personal Care Products Council Foundation, in collaboration with the American Cancer Society and the Professional Beauty Association, hosted their annual black-tie gala, DreamBall, to raise funds for the Look Good Feel Better program. The Love Button Global Movement was happy to donate 400 Love Buttons to the event to help celebrate the work of an organization that brings love and healing to so many around the world. For more than 30 years, the Look Good Feel Better program has assisted over one million people fighting cancer in the U.S., and 1.7 million around the world to regain their confidence by helping them cope with the appearance challenges associated with cancer treatment.

Workshops are available in all 50 states and are operated by local experts who offer lessons in cosmetics, wardrobe, and accessories application.

The event was held at Cipriani on 42nd Street in New York City, and NBC News correspondent, Tamron Hall, acted as

100

mistress of ceremonies for the evening.

Beauty industry leaders Daniel M. Annese, Global Brand President, Aramis and Designer Fragrances, The Estée Lauder Companies; and Marc Rey, President and CEO of Shiseido Americas were honored. Two Look Good Feel Better participants were also honored, Broadway star, Valisia LeKae, and America’s Got Talent sensation, Calysta Bevier. Both artists, who also performed at the event, shared their inspiring stories of triumph over ovarian cancer and how important the Look Good Feel Better program was in their healing process.

“At the American Cancer Society, we regularly hear from patients that the aesthetic side effects that accompany treatment for ovarian cancer, or any cancer, can be emotionally debilitating,” said Kris Kim, Executive Vice President and Eastern Division Operating Officer for the American Cancer Society.

“The Look Good Feel Better Program helps alleviate this anxiety, so women can refocus their attention on healing.”

Love Button Supports Fan Fest Orlando

Learn more about Fan Fest Orlando by visiting: http:// fanfest.com/ orlando/

On September 17th, thousands of fans converged on the Orange County Convention Center in Orlando, Florida to attend the one-day only Fan Fest Orlando.

This special fundraising event was hosted by the creators of Heroes & Villains Fan Fest and Walker Stalker Con, two of the world’s largest tradeshow events that bring fans and the stars of their favorite superhero and zombie TV shows face to face. The event featured stars from shows such as The Walking Dead, Arrow, The Flash, and more. All proceeds from ticket sales, celebrity autographs, photos ops and vendor sales were donated to the One Orlando Fund. As part of the VIP attendee package, the Love Button Global Movement donated 2,000 Love Buttons to the cause that benefitted families of the Pulse Nightclub tragedy.

101

Love Button at the Los Angeles Women’s March This year started off on an interesting note to say the least. With the country on edge more than 1 million people rallied at women’s marches in the nation’s capital and other cities around the world. Led by the Women’s March organization, the goal was to stand together in solidarity for the protection of women’s rights, safety, health, and families. With a central march going on in Washington D.C. and various sister marches throughout the country, we saw an opportunity and a real need to drop into the Los Angeles march with some Love buttons and our magnificent Love amabassadors.

We stand together in solidarity for the protection of our rights, our safety, our health, and our families – recognizing that our vibrant and diverse communities are the strength of our country.

In the spirit of democracy and honoring the champions of human rights, dignity, and justice who have come before us, we join in diversity to show our presence in numbers too great to ignore. We stand together, recognizing that defending the most marginalized among us is defending all of us.

102

Learn more about the Women’s March Los Angeles Foundation and their mission by visiting: https://womensmarchla. org/

PHOTO CREDIT: THEO WARGO/GETT Y IMAGES & KOUROSH M. KHA JAV OF LEICA-MAN.COM

103

Love Button Honors Illusionist On the September 6th airing of the TODAY show, Canadian illusionist, Lucas Wilson, performed an escape from a straightjacket while suspended upside down by his ankles.

The fact that he escaped from the contraption in record time was impressive enough, but when Lucas finally threw the straightjacket to the ground, he was suspended in the air wearing a Love Button T-shirt! During Lucas’ entire interview with the show’s hosts, the red Love Button logo on Lucas’ white T-shirt was proudly displayed for the entire country to see.

The next day, Love Button personnel got in

104

touch with Lucas to learn how he discovered our organization and why our mission matters to him. As a thank you for being so dedicated to our cause, Love Button honored Lucas with two VIP tickets to the 2016 Global Citizen Festival in Central Park on September 24th. Acting as a Love Button Ambassador at the event, Lucas got the chance to meet Coldplay lead singer, Chris Martin, and to make more loving connections during the celebration. Since returning to Canada, Lucas has continued to perform his illusion act and magic tricks in hospitals for sick children, where he shares his love and Love Buttons.

Learn more about Lucas Wilson the Illusionist by visiting: https://www. lucaswilson.ca/

S P R E A D

T H E

L O V E

You can do something loving for another person anytime, but giving them a Love Button at the same time serves as a lasting reminder of your kindness and encourages them to pay it forward. A Love Button is a calling card that says we’re all connected by a power far greater than any of our differences.

Use the buttons as a creative way to remind yourself and others of the power of love. By wearing a button, giving it away, or gifting it for a particular occasion, you take a stand for the message that Love is the way we can change the world. Love is what unites us all, and the Love Button Global Movement belongs to all of us. Every one of us has the power to change the world in ways big and small, through one act of kindness at a time.

Visit lovebutton.org today and get your Love Buttons in packs of 10, 25, or 100.

Love Button Hosts an Event at the University of Santa Monica On June 7, 2016 the Love Button Global Movement hosted an event at the University of Santa Monica. This event brought together members of our community with leaders from the Israel Interfaith Encounter Association to talk about the extraordinary work the association does in bringing young Israelis and Arabs together in a whole new context. This new context is one of goodwill, friendship, and shared experiences rather than the fighting and discord that too many of them have become accustomed to. June 7th also happened to be Presidential Primary Election Day here in California, and on this day, we got a chance to vote for a different kind of candidate. Through our participation in this event, we cast our collective vote for peace all over the world.

We wish to express our heartfelt gratitude to the following people for helping bring this idea to light:

Out of that loving gathering the kernel of an idea has grown. We would like to share it with you now in the hope that we can nurture it together into a beautiful new reality. The vision we are holding is this: a Coldplay concert in a park in Israel, attended by 50,000 people—half Arabs, half Israelis—all of whom have come together on this momentous occasion in a spirit of joy and love to communicate with one another through the universal language of music.

Ms. Anita Coates, whose performance of her original song “Peace Is Possible” inspired us all, and who, Mr. Martin has agreed, will open for Coldplay at the concert in Israel.

The purpose of this grand event is no small one, and it goes well beyond creating a joyous memory for all those who attend. Its greater purpose is to create the critical mass necessary to change the current course and put the region on a path toward peace.

We ask you, for now, to hold this idea in confidence in order to allow it the space it needs to grow. We also ask that you consider what you can do personally to bring light and energy to this vision so that it does indeed grow into an amazing new reality.

106

Drs. Mary and Ron Hulnick, who were generous enough to host this event at the University of Santa Monica.

Dr. Yehuda Stolov, Founder of the Israel Interfaith Encounter Association.

Mr. Rahhal Rahhal, Coordinator of IEA; and Mr. Ibrahim Mustafa, Group Manager of IEA, whose profound work and participation in this event inspired us all.

Mr. Chris Martin, lead singer of Coldplay, who, upon hearing about this event, was moved to bring forth the notion of playing a concert in Israel.

Mr. Yehuda Naftali, for accommodating Dr. Yehuda and Mr. Rahhal, and for taking a stand to sponsor the Coldplay event in Israel by providing tickets for Palestinians in conjunction with his organization BIG.

Learn more about University of Santa Monica by visiting: http://www. universityofsantamonica. edu/

To that end, we are attaching two sources of inspiration:

The Love Button Global Movement’s “Violence to Love” poster—an image that we envision being posted all around the venue, with its message translated into Hebrew and Arabic, to evoke in all who see it the “courage to heal.”

A poem by the 13th century Persian poet Sa’adi whose words grace the entrance to the United Nations as a plea to break down the barriers that separate us from one another.

“Human beings are members of a whole, In creation of one essence and soul.

If one member is afflicted with pain, Other members uneasy will remain.

If you’ve no sympathy for human pain, The name of human you cannot retain!”

Sa’adi

PHOTO CREDIT: INSTAGRAM USER @ @M_RBMNL

Coldplay Concert & Love Button We were honored to join Coldplay at a concert last year in Los Angeles which allowed us to spread our message while letting our hair down after a very busy and productive year. It’s kind of a clichÊ but Love is more important now than ever and nothing brings people together like great music. Besides being an amazing group of individuals, Coldplay is a great ambassador of Love around the world through their music and loving actions, and we thank them for their support.

PHOTO CREDIT: KOUROSH M. KHA JAV OF LEICA-MAN.COM

108

Love Button Throws Surprise Birthday Party for Javier Bardem PHOTO CREDIT: KOUROSH M. KHA JAV OF LEICA-MAN.COM

D I S P L A Y

Y O U R

W I T H

A

P R AY E R F LAG erials Recycled Mat % 0 0 1 m o r eF Flag Mad d e t f a r C ualityHigh Q

N O W

A V A I L A B L E

I N

2

S I Z E S

Show the world your dedication to changing the world with love by proudly displaying a Love Button prayer flag. Modeled after the ancient Tibetan prayer flags used by Shamanistic Bonpo priests in healing ceremonies, these prayer flags have been created to spread the healing energy of love in the same powerful way.

The Tibetan word for prayer flag is Dar Cho, which means Dar, to increase life, fortune, health and wealth, to Cho or all sentient beings. The power of these ancient flags came from the blessings provided by the Bonpo priests whose title means, those who recite magical formulas. Coupled with the natural energy of the wind, it was believed that the prayers and blessings contained within the flag would then be scattered on the breeze to bring harmony, happiness and good fortune to all living beings in the local vicinity, and even around the world.

lovebutton.org/shop

WHEN

Love is Needed Most

In addition to the incredible Organizations we partner with, we’d like to thank our amazing supporters, ambassadors, and talented fans who help us transform and uplift the lives of our human family.

M

O

R

E

H

I

G

H

L

I

G

H

T S

J E R I C H O • G LO B A L C I T I Z E N • T E AC H E R E D U CAT I O N • I T H ACA • K I D S D AY • W O M E N ’ S M A R C H • C O L D P LAY • A M B A S S A D O R S • S U P P O RT E R S • P H OTO S

Photo: Instagram user @jacquelinecqm Photo: Instagram user @extraalucide

Photo credit: vivliu.com

Photo credit: vivliu.com Photo: Instagram user @extraalucide

Photo: Instagram user @thecarriebearie

Read all our stories and share your Love Button experience with #pauseandlove LOV E B U T TO N .O R G

“Stop the Glorification of Busy” ANONYMOUS

Making Ordinary Family Moments

Extraordinary B Y L O U HA R V E Y- Z A HR A

he universe has rhythms. Day and night, the seasons of the year, and high and low tides are examples of the perfectly balanced rhythms of our planet. We have rhythms inside us: our heartbeat, our breathing, and our walking pace.

Positive family rhythms provide a foundation of stability, trust, love, and connection for young children. Daily family rhythms help keep life in balance. Let us look at an ordinary day and see what moments parents can make extraordinary for their children. Even if we are “time poor,” most of the suggestions below take half a minute or so and hold priceless gifts: gifts for children, gifts of connection - loving communication and touch – as well as gifts of creativity in daily life. They also hold the key to fewer struggles of wills, and will maximize positive behaviours during meals, rest, and bedtimes. If you can’t be at home with your young children every night of the week, create these rhythms on the weekends.

can bond. During a meal, if at home, sit with your child and play a “thank you” game: thank you to the farmer who grew the wheat that made the bread I am eating, thank you to the cow that gave the milk that made the cheese, thank you to the clouds and showers that watered the fruit I am eating.

This not only tells children where their food comes from (Jamie Oliver would be happy!), it helps them feel part of the larger community and brings gratitude and respect back to the dinner table – qualities we lose in a fast-paced life.

At the evening meal, sit together as a family whenever you can. This helps to build your “tribe.” The family dinner table is truly a time of communication, as well as nourishment. Each family member can take a turn to say what his or her favourite part of the day was, and to share daily news, however simple, with each other. Children as young as three can have a turn.

My husband is an accountant – he might say that he got a new client. The news doesn’t have to be exciting! Be a role model of loving communication for children to follow.

How are we to “meet” children each day? Step into their shoes, and imagine how you would like to be greeted! Like the rising of the sun, create emotional warmth and bonding If directly asked about their day, children may be reluctant to start the day together. This is a time to share. However, if adults act as role of butterfly kisses (tickling with your eye models, sharing their daily news first, “Positive family lashes on a soft cheek), cuddles, stories, children are more likely to take their turn. rhythms provide and a chat. The day may get busier, and If not, there is always another dinnertime. we may not see much of each other, but By fostering this daily rhythm of chatting a foundation of we have already experienced a moment at the dinner table (with the TV kept off stability, trust, love, and all mobile devices away!) during the of connection. and connection for vital years, it continues naturally for life.

The mealtime table is a special place It gives the message that we care about in our homes - a place to enjoy food, young children.” each family member’s life. Yes, we may yes, but also a place where the family

114

well have teenagers who communicate with more than a grunt! If one parent works late, the at-home parent can have a light snack while sitting with the children during their earlier meal. In this case, the family can establish the rhythm of eating together during the weekend.

“At the evening meal, sit together as a family whenever you can.

This helps to build your “tribe.” The family dinner table is truly a time of communication, as well as nourishment.”

When a young child stops taking her daytime nap, she may still require an afternoon rest. To make rest-time into a happy ritual, you may want to light a rest-time candle, or have a child’s sofa where the two of you can curl up with soft toys and a storybook.

Is the weather sunny?

Read together under a tree, or watch the leaves dance and find pictures in clouds. When a child gets home from school or kindergarten, create a special rest place and read stories to unwind together. Adults tell me that remembering to have a daily rest has enhanced their lives and moods too!

three things in the room, followed by a lullaby with nice words, and a soft touch.

Sing, stroke, and slow down. Any tune, if it’s slow and loving is fine. Bedtimes can become a big gift of love for children.

My daughter, when younger, was always quite restless when she first got in bed, and would get up with any excuse.

But she tended to settle much more easily when she had a ride on Daddy’s shoulders to the bathroom, teethy tales, her special bedtime poem, and a lullaby while her hair was stroked. One night, when I was in a rush – yes, a hurried life! – I skipped all our rituals, disrupted her rhythm, and just said, “Go to sleep, it’s late!” Her little voice explained, “Mum, have you not worked out that when you sing to me and stroke my hair, I have sweeter dreams?” The wisdom of a six-year-old!

Begin the bedtime rhythm each evening in a creative way.

For instance, young children often enjoy getting a ride to the bathroom standing on a parent’s feet (facing the parent and holding onto their legs) or receiving a gentle plane trip on Daddy’s shoulders. Once in the bathroom, teeth brushing can be made inspiring by playing a little imaginative game.

I have not yet known a child who does not like “teethy tales.”

All children are basically egocentric; they like to hear about themselves, so tell a tale about the daily adventures of each tooth as it is cleaned! “This tooth ate cornflakes for breakfast, this tooth played with toy cars, this tooth loved eating cheese on toast for lunch, this tooth smiled at Nannie.” This little game makes teeth cleaning fun, and recounting the special parts of the day is a lovely way for children to finish their activities and wind down for bed.

For many years, I used a soft simple tune to sing about those people who loved my daughter – including our animals – while stroking her hair and face. What is given to children, they tend to give back out to the world. I once found my daughter in our lounge with our dog wrapped in a blanket. She was stroking his head lovingly while sweetly singing the lullaby to him, remembering to mention all the neighbourhood dogs who loved him! The look on the dog’s face was one of pure bliss!

Getting from the bathroom to the bedroom can be made fun with a piggyback ride, or by marching like a soldier. Make it enjoyable, but not too stimulating! The plane is landing back at the airport, or the horse is galloping slowly to the stable. Once in bed, there are many creative ways to help your young ones move on to dreamland. Say “goodnight” to

I reflect that our own children stop us – in other ways!

– because they, like young whales, need connection and attention. With a steady daily loving rhythm, including morning greetings, meals, rest, and bedtime, we can ensure that the attention they need is built in. They do not have to sit on our blowhole and demand it!

Lou Harvey-Zahra is a parenting author and teacher, and parent of two. Lou resides in Melbourne, Australia and presents Conscious Parenting and Creative Discipline workshops worldwide. Her books include the bestseller Happy Child, Happy Home, and her new book Creative Discipline, Connected Family. Her books are available on all online bookstores.

See Lou’s website, skiptomylouparenting.com, for more parenting ideas.

I was teaching a class of seven-year-olds once and we had been reading a book about whales. During question and comment time, a child piped up with, “Did you know that young whales really need their parents’ attention? If they don’t get attention, they will lie on a parent’s blowhole so the parent can’t breathe!” Wow, what a story!

LOU’S LOVE BUTTON TIPS Glance at your love button throughout the day, pause and breathe in love, then share it!

Glance at your love button and remember the power of touch and love for a young child, especially at rest and bedtime.

115

Of Tempers & Temperaments WHAT THE PERSONALITIES OF OTHERS CAN TEACH US ABOUT OURSELVES AND LEADING A MORE BALANCED LIFE

By Dr. Habib Sadeghi

SANGUIN

MELANCHOLIC

CHOLERIC

PHLEGMATIC

Feat ured on:

n the ancient past, the basis of Greek medicine was a philosophy known as constitutional medicine.

Humans were divided into four groups based on their psychological and emotional make up or temperament. Each type of human temperament was governed by a bodily fluid or humor (blood, yellow bile, black bile and phlegm), and corresponded with one of the physical elements of nature (earth, air, water and fire).

When a person was ill, he or she was said to be ill-tempered or out of humor. Medicines and treatments were prescribed to support the weaknesses of the person’s particular physical constitution and emotional temperament in order to bring him or her back into a healthy balance. People who were out of humor (out of alignment with their normal temperament) were said to be humorous because they often acted in odd, irritable, or strange ways. Originally, the word humorous was strictly a physiological term, but over time became equated with something that was funny because ill-tempered characters in stage plays could make the audience laugh.

A full, healthy life includes healthy relationships. Understanding more about our personal temperament and how it relates to the temperaments of others can help us improve communication and build better relationships with our children, siblings, parents, and even co-workers. Education expert, Rudolf Steiner, spoke often about the need to understand individual temperaments in order for teachers to better engage students in the classroom.

In September 2016, I gave a workshop at the GOOP offices in London on understanding temperaments as part of my Transformational Intensive self-improvement life coach series. Many of the people in attendance were impressed with how much I knew about their general disposition even though I’d never met them before.

My insights came from my understanding of the temperaments.

MegaZEN // 2017 ISSUE

Social Butterflies The sanguine temperament is governed by the blood humor. With a well-proportioned, medium height to tall physique, these people generally have rosy complexions, thick hair, good digestion and metabolism, with a tendency for a slow bowel, sluggish liver and pancreas, and blood disorders.

They are outgoing, mostly cheerful lovers of beauty with good imaginations and a sense of intuition. They never over think things, which can be a problem when they don’t think things through enough. Their mental orientation is directed very much toward the outer world, so they’re not very introspective, but are highly social and susceptible to hearsay and gossip.

Because of their hyper-social natures, their gift to the world is their ability to bring joyfulness and fun to others. A sanguine person at a party can converse with anyone about anything, and flit effortlessly from one group of people or strangers to another. While kind and sincere, they’re poor listeners and easily distracted, so they often depart one conversation for another mid-sentence. Their intention isn’t to be rude, but because the vast majority of their attention is focused on the outside world, their focus is easily pulled in one direction and then another, much the same way a child can

SANGUIN

be fascinated with one toy until he sees another child playing with something better. Pondering a decision is usually difficult for the sanguine person, who often asks lots of people for advice before making certain choices, only to change his mind again later. (They’re the people constantly returning merchandise to department stores.) Outward appearances are very important, so their homes will be well appointed with lots of colorful cushions and photographs everywhere. Just don’t look in the closets and cupboards! That’s where everything else has been stuffed.

Relating to the natural energy of air, their lack of introspection and strong tendency to be led by their emotions rather than reason, can be frustrating for others who often perceive them as “touchyfeely,” flighty, unreliable, or irresponsible. Their attention span is very short, and their memory can be like a sieve. Although they’re the life of the party, getting there or anywhere on time is not one of their strong points. While their gift to the world is joy and lightness, they must learn how to be grounded, and what it means to really listen. These are crucial qualities they can adopt from people with a melancholic temperament, but only if they resist avoiding or judging them as self-serious or boring.

Weight of the World The melancholic temperament is governed by the black bile humor. Physical features include a squarish head, and a face with prominent cheekbones. They often have dark straight hair, swarthy complexions and a mid-size to tall frame that tends to be on the thin side. With a weak appetite and a tendency for gas, bloating, and insomnia, these people have a predisposition for anorexia, constipation, blood sugar problems, arthritis, and spleen disorders. Based in earth energy, they are very grounded people and feel the gravity of all things in a deeper way than most others. As deep thinkers, their energy is mostly focused inward leading them to be introverted and philosophical by nature. Decisions are made very carefully and deliberately after weighing all the options. They’re always checking their balance sheet and never prone to impulse purchases or just taking off for a weekend vacation with no pre-planning. They much prefer two or three close friends they can confide in than lots of casual social acquaintances.

These people can ponder things so deeply that they often feel as if they carry the weight of the world on their shoulders. Because of their inward nature, most of their problems are generated

MELANCHOLIC

internally. They often over think, worry too much, stress over small issues that they turn into major ones, and contemplate all the things that could go wrong in a situation. Because of this, their mood can be a bit unstable and sometimes overwhelm those around them. Never tell these kinds of people to “just get over it” because it trivializes what they’re going through. They need to sit with the negative energy of a problem until they feel it’s properly processed. Actually, they’re quite happy being a bit gloomy most of the time. The upside here is that they make excellent listeners when someone else is sharing their problems with them. They are very loyal and will always be there offering a shoulder to cry on. They have a strong sense of empathy, love, and caring. Their gift to the world is their compassion.

They are prone to perfectionism and are very punctual with little patience for those who are chronically late. Melancholic people need to learn to keep life in balance and prevent their moods from overwhelming others in their company. They can have their deeper concerns, but must understand how not to live a fear-based life that prevents them from really living in the present moment.

117

MegaZEN // 2017 ISSUE

Fearless Leaders The choleric temperament is predominantly focused outward and is governed by the yellow bile humor. Their physique is solid and on the stocky side with broad shoulders, prominent veins, and good muscle tone. Their face is reddish, and they often have curly, thin, or balding hair. They have penetrating eyes and a steady gaze. Although these people aren’t traditionally tall, they seem taller than they are because of their commanding presence. With a cast iron digestion and a love of meat and spicy foods, they’re prone to fitful sleep, infections, inflammation, fatty liver, and cardiovascular disorders.

Choleric people have more physical energy than the other three temperaments and can often be found exercising for hours or working late into the night. The natural energy that governs their

Slow & Steady Like melancholic, the phlegmatic temperament energy is also focused inward. As expected, phlegm is the bodily humor that oversees this temperament, which is usually identified by a round face, soft features, big cheeks, large eyes, thick lashes, and mid-size to short fleshy build. Their bodies can be solid or even overweight with a double chin. Their heartrate and metabolism are slow, and they have a tendency for deep sleep, poor circulation, thyroid and adrenal problems, lymphatic congestion, gastric issues, and respiratory complications.

In fact, much about these people is slow. They’re not rushing their way through life. Their disposition is very calm, and it’s easy for them to go with the flow, as their natural energy is governed by water. They don’t need to talk much and are often perceived as boring. In reality, they often have much going on under the surface, but you have to take the time to get to know them to find this out. In fact,

CHOLERIC

temperament is fire. Their body temperature generally runs hot, and they will often sleep with little or no covering on the bed. Because of their commanding presence, these people make strong natural leaders that take charge easily with no tolerance for procrastination, and a powerful drive to get things done. They’re highly organized, love a challenge, and like helping people. Although they won’t admit it, they like to be recognized for what they accomplish and thanked for what they do, but will struggle privately if publicly criticized. Their gift to the world is to be the pioneers who show others the way. Nonetheless, they can be aggressive, bossy and stubborn. While bold and courageous, they’re also quick to anger and impatient. They need to learn self-control, and that not everyone is choleric like them.

PHLEGMATIC

they’re very interesting people, but are not inclined to talk about they’re thinking, and don’t give their opinions away casually. They value their privacy and don’t want to stand out. It’s nice to recognize a phlegmatic person in private, but don’t make him or her the center of attention. They love food, rest, and a good book. Naturally introverted, they can be perceived as lazy because everything about them is slow, even the way they move.

Their presence is very calming, they have a natural gift for nurturing and a sense of humor. Rudolf Steiner said they made the best teachers because of these qualities along with their tendency for great patience. Their gift to the world is that they are the peacemakers and like to keep things in balance.

However, they need to stop being so passive and learn to be motivated in order to get their lives moving toward their desired goals, and keep their hypersensitivity in check.

Complement Instead of Conflict The intention here isn’t to imply that one temperament is better than the other. That simply isn’t true. All temperaments are needed to keep life and society balanced. Imagine if we were all Choleric. We’d be pulling ourselves in countless different directions, as we all struggled with wanting to be the leader, and fighting over which way was the right way, as our tempers flared out of control. Ultimately, we’d all get nowhere if everyone saw themselves as a leader and no one was willing to follow. Likewise, if everyone was phlegmatic, the world would be bogged down by a lack of motivation, never moving forward, as we all took offense at the merest slight.

118

MegaZEN // 2017 ISSUE Just as the seasons balance each other, and summer is no more or less important than winter, our human temperaments are gifts that balance human society. The sanguine must learn how to be more grounded by observing and befriending the melancholic, who can start to understand what it means to lighten up once in a while from his sanguine friend. At the same time, the phlegmatic gets a great example of self-direction in the choleric, who in turn can benefit from the phlegmatic’s example as the peacemaker. If we judge others simply because we don’t like some of their qualities, we lose the opportunity to learn from them and grow.

To temper something means to blend, so our ultimate goal as spiritual beings is to be able to access melancholic compassion and grounding, sanguine imagination and playfulness, phlegmatic peace and choleric conviction and motivation in the moments when they are most important to us, and as they apply to our overall predominant temperament. This is spiritual development.

Temperamental Life Cycles According to Rudolf Steiner, as human beings are born and grow, they move through seven-year cycles of life that mirror the four temperaments and are reflected in the mind and body. Clearly, a baby’s body is phlegmatic with its pudgy appearance and soft fleshy limbs. Nearly every priority is related to the needs of the physical body, particularly whether the baby needs changing, sleep, is hungry, or has a fever, and so on. In order for the baby to be content, it requires peace, quiet, softness, nurturing, and a feeling of safety, just as the phlegmatic temperament does. Too much sanguine stimulation will easily upset the infant, and a colicky baby is a sign that there may be too much stimulation affecting it inwardly. To maximize calmness, Steiner suggested veiling the crib to mimic the security of the womb and following very gradual steps in taking the baby from the home, first into the yard and later into the outside world.

When the baby becomes a toddler, there is a significant change not just to the body, but in the temperament, as well. In moving from phlegmatic to choleric, the toddler’s body becomes more solid, compact, and stocky. Along with this change comes loads of newfound energy. Suddenly, the toddler becomes very driven, running here and there, getting into everything. If, as parents, we understand that this transition is coming and that it’s perfectly natural and good, we can refrain from negatively judging it as the “terrible twos” and instead work with it to the child’s greatest benefit.

With a new sense of motivation, toddlers want to do things for themselves. The right side of the brain is now firing up and joining with the left side in a rapid and essential phase of development. Much of toddlers’ behavior arises out of their natural desire to move. Because of this powerful psychological and physiological influence, toddlers aren’t meant to sit still, except when they’re asleep. When we don’t understand the temperament that naturally guides this stage of life and we scold children with “No!” or “Stop it!” or force them to go against their natural inclinations, we arrest their development to a very real degree.

It’s in this stage of life that children become highly selfaware. No longer do they simply point and say, “ball.” Now, they say, “I want ball,” or “I want milk.” This is the self-directed choleric talking who’s saying, “I’m here, I know what I want, and I’m going to get it.” The toddler now sees him or herself as fully separate from his or her parents with his or her own needs. He is a cause that can have its own effect. When he bangs on pots on the kitchen floor, it makes incredible noise.

He’s feeling his own power to create change in the world.

That’s incredible and something that shouldn’t be stopped.

When we stop the child in the choleric stage, we interrupt his or her will and direct purpose. Then, the choleric temper flares up, and we get resistance. This doesn’t mean that the toddler can’t be redirected to bang on something else like a drum instead of a pot, but it’s the parents’ responsibility to understand the importance of what she’s doing, and

OUR JOB AS PARENTS ISN’T TO MAKE OUR CHILDREN LIKE US, BUT TO GUIDE THEM INTO THE FULL POTENTIAL OF WHO THEY’RE ALREADY DESTINED TO BE

MegaZEN // 2017 ISSUE that it’s not simply an annoying behavior taken up for no reason. If the child is climbing on the furniture, get him some monkey bars to climb on in the backyard, but don’t tell him to stop climbing and leave it at that. His choleric drive will only force him to continue to do so, either openly or away from his parents’ eyes. He must do this because his development is compelling him to do so. It’s unfortunate then that children are so often punished for merely following their natural inclinations.

Cherishing Childhood Leaving the toddler years, the child’s body begins to heighten, evening up its proportions by stretching out and looking much more balanced or sanguine. Unless there is an overwhelming tendency for one temperament over another, most children will have a sanguine body at this stage between ages three and nine. It is during this stage that children need lots of opportunities to use their imagination and pretend. Fill their lives with wonderment, crafts, and story time. We only get one childhood. Do your best to fill it with magic and discovery. Like sanguine adults, know that children during this stage are going to be flitty with an attention span that’s somewhat erratic. It’s not that they’re deliberately ignoring a parent when told to put their shoes on, it’s just that their attention has been entirely captured by a nearby toy, and for them, the shoes simply don’t exist anymore. They’ve forgotten about them entirely in an instant.

Be patient with them.

While not a temperament stage in itself, the time between 9 and 11 is a transitional phase where imagination begins to give way to stark realizations about the world. Children cease living in the magic of the present moment and begin to contemplate past and future more. Leaving the sanguine sense that the world is largely good, adolescents come to understand, when story time is over, that there is much about life that doesn’t end happily ever after. There can be a sense of isolation and aloneness in these middle school years. Although Steiner never specified it as such, this could easily be considered a developmental melancholic stage,

IF WE UNDERSTAND THE NATURAL PROGRESSION THROUGH THE TEMPERAMENTS AS CHILDREN GROW, WE CAN LESSEN MUCH OF THE AGGRAVATION FOR OURSELVES AND PREVENT MOST OF THE POWER STRUGGLES ALONG THE WAY.

where the child’s personal world becomes somewhat of a burden with mounting school responsibilities, bullying, understanding the reality of the world, and so on.

Independence & Indecision Beginning at 12 and through the teenage years, it’s back into a driven, opinionated choleric stage, where teens are learning to be independent on an entirely different scale.

They’ll certainly say, “No!” many times and struggle with authority, but that’s because they’re striving to be the leaders of their own lives, and become independent with more autonomy. Of course, this is important. Otherwise, it’s easy to end up with a 30-year-old living in the basement, playing video games all day. Still, that doesn’t mean the process is easy. But if we understand the natural progression through the temperaments as children grow, we can lessen much of the aggravation for ourselves and prevent most of the power struggles along the way.

Part of trying to figure out who they are and what they’re about includes finding out who they’re not and what they don’t like. That means choleric teens tend to criticize—a lot.

Understanding where a teen is coming from developmentally makes it easier to not take offense at their judgmental quips.

For example, if a teen complains that the way his parent is dressed is embarrassing to him, it can be fun to use some sanguine humor and wittily reply that’s it’s a parent’s job to make a spectacle of themselves, mortifying their children wherever they go. As critical as they can be, cholerics still appreciate a sense of humor. If the criticisms are cruel or disrespectful in nature, let the child know he’s gotten too personal. Cholerics do have a heart. It’s important to always remember that as judgmental as they can seem on the outside, choleric teens are looking in the mirror and judging everything about themselves in the same way when parents aren’t looking.

Subtlety for Success Because they’re in leadership mode and struggling to run

their own lives, you can’t just tell teens what to do and not expect resistance. You can’t. They want to be self-directed, so in order to get them to do something, parents have to be indirect in their request so that it feels to the teen as if he’s acted from his own motivation in taking an action. This can be accomplished with a simple change in how a request is worded. “It’s freezing out. Get your heavy winter coat, and don’t forget your gloves,” sounds like an order and interrupts a choleric’s ability to make his own choices and define his own path. To avoid resistance with a choleric teen, a better choice of words would be, “Are you suited up for that freezing weather out there?” This suggests that the teen needs to wear his heavy winter coat without making a direct demand, and moves his mind in that direction so it feels to him like he came up with the choice to do so all on his own.

Negotiation is extremely important to help choleric teens maintain a sense of control and personal say in most matters. Try not to use ultimatums such as “my way or the highway,” if you want to avoid serious resistance. If doing certain chores around the house is an issue, perhaps the solution is giving a teen her choice of two days off per week, as long as she commits and does a good job the other five days. Nagging will do no good. In fact, because cholerics are leaders, they’re doers. They don’t like lots of explanation.

The fewer words, the better. Besides, it’s not really about what parents say, but how they say it that makes the difference as to whether something gets done with or without resistance. So an initial request like, “Are you mowing the grass today?

It’s a jungle out there,” could be replaced with, “Mowing today?” or an even more subtle prompt like taking the lawnmower keys off the hook on the kitchen wall and jingling them conspicuously to get the teen’s attention.

Full Circle After the teen years, we settle into what our main temperament will be for the bulk of our lives. By the mid-40s, we enter the melancholic stage of life once again where we become more introspective, particularly about the past, and worry about things like the future, retirement, health, and so on. Sometimes, we have no idea why we’re worrying or depressed as we succumb to the grip of a midlife crisis. This time of life can really be disorienting for people who are largely sanguine. Anytime we go through struggles like this, there’s always the opportunity to learn to feel compassion for others in similar situations.

Finally, in old age we come full circle by entering a phlegmatic stage once again. All the noise of life is too much. We need our peace and quiet, and the comforts of life around us. Our bodies become loose and slack, losing strength and tone, reminiscent of the infant’s body.

UNDERSTANDING MORE ABOUT OUR PERSONAL TEMPERAMENT AND HOW IT RELATES TO THE TEMPERAMENTS OF OTHERS CAN HELP US IMPROVE COMMUNICATION AND BUILD BETTER RELATIONSHIPS WITH OUR CHILDREN, SIBLINGS, PARENTS, AND EVEN CO-WORKERS.

OUR ULTIMATE GOAL AS SPIRITUAL BEINGS IS TO BE ABLE TO ACCESS MELANCHOLIC COMPASSION AND GROUNDING, SANGUINE IMAGINATION AND PLAYFULNESS, PHLEGMATIC PEACE AND CHOLERIC CONVICTION AND MOTIVATION IN THE MOMENTS WHEN THEY ARE MOST IMPORTANT TO US, AND AS THEY APPLY TO OUR OVERALL PREDOMINANT TEMPERAMENT. THIS IS SPIRITUAL DEVELOPMENT.

Essential Early Support Keep in mind that though these are stages of life we all pass through, our individual dominant temperament is taking shape at the same time. In most cases, parents can tell very early on whether they have a sanguine, melancholic, choleric or phlegmatic child on their hands and should act accordingly, based on their temperamental needs. The choleric child who yearns to be a leader needs someone to look up to, an example to follow. Children are largely imitators, so set a very good example and inspire their admiration. Show them photos of amazing things you’ve done, and help them visualize seeing themselves doing great things too. Let them do as much as is safe, and if possible, on their own. Assisting with cooking meals, caring for the family pet, and helping younger children with tasks, can be great ways to support your budding little choleric leader, while setting safe boundaries. Teach her how to deal with anger by insisting that she learn to respectfully address others or walk away until she can do that. This emphasizes self-control. Be sure to give her challenges, and take advantage of every opportunity to recognize her achievements and help her stand out.

If your child is internal and melancholic, he may not want a surprise birthday party that makes him the center of attention. Keep things enjoyable, but predictable, as melancholics value routine very much. They have a tendency to exaggerate the seriousness of issues, so always try to put things into perspective, stressing that their personal problems aren’t the end of the world. Of course, it’s always a good idea to share how you may have suffered in a similar way and survived, in order to foster his sense of compassion.

The phlegmatic child should be noticed, but privately. A gold star on a school paper is the perfect way to recognize her. Don’t ask her to read her paper in front of the class. It’s very important to incorporate physical exercise around fun

122

activities and not to encourage exercise for its own sake.

Never use food as a reward or consequence for any reason.

Be sure to give her a peaceful environment, and motivate her by showing how fun an activity can be so she naturally wants to participate.

The sanguine child is all about change, so don’t pack the same school lunch two days in a row. He loves all the little surprises you can provide for him, even if it’s just a note in his lunchbox saying how much you love him. Always do something a little different, and keep it interesting. Have patience with his fragmented attention, and set a good example for what it means to be responsible and grounded.

Seeing the Divine Essence Don’t judge your child’s temperament or wish his tendencies favored another way. Our job as parents isn’t to make our children like us, but to guide them into the full potential of who they’re already destined to be.

That decision was made beyond our awareness and without our input. We are merely earthly stewards of our children’s development, not the navigators of it. This means understanding and working with their temperaments, and being as willing to learn from what they have to teach us about our temperamental needs, as we are quick to offer advice to them.

Rudolf Steiner said that we could develop the ability to examine our fellow men and study the expression of their character or temperament. With this insight, we can glance into the tiny heart of our child and recognize how her soul is taking shape in its wondrous and uniquely singular way, and choose to connect with her in the specific way in which she was created to thrive. Steiner said this is what it means to see and honor the divine essence in another human being.

When we can do this for others, we make it possible for them to become more of who they were meant to be, and in the process, give ourselves permission to do the same.

Of Mind & Medicine How what we think about ourselves and others shapes our health BY: D R . H A B I B SA D E G H I

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

’m usually the last doctor most people come to see.

By the time patients make it to my office, they’ve been to most of the major medical centers in the country or around the world, and have seen or been treated by up to 20 or even 30 different physicians and specialists. I’m the last stop for a lot of very sick patients who’ve exhausted their limited options within the spectrum of modern medicine and are seeking a broader, more integrative approach to their health challenges. While they don’t always express it, I can see it in their eyes - I’m their last hope. Fortunately, they come to me with armloads of tests, scans, x-rays and bloodwork, so there’s no need to continue down the path other doctors have taken before me. I use integrative medical protocols to fill in crucial gaps and spend much effort treating the one aspect of the patient that never seems to get any attention - the mind.

Invisible Influence Years ago, a friend of mine ended up in the emergency room and while he was being treated by the nurse on duty, she said something that surprised him. “You know,” she said matter-of-factly, “after doing this job for years, I’ve come to understand that on some level, people participate in their illness. There’s some part of their psyche that invites or sustains it.”

Although the nurse was thinking out loud, she didn’t say anything that most doctors, myself included, haven’t thought at one time or another. I have lots of patients who don’t smoke or drink, eat only organic, non-GMO food, get lots of sleep, and do yoga, who struggle with serious health conditions while others who eat processed food, never exercise, and even smoke, enjoy lots of energy and live healthy lives. I’m not advising that anyone take up bad habits or stop good ones, but years of simple observation would prove to anyone that there’s something much deeper at play in our lives that creates the experience of health or illness - and no, it’s not genetics. Genes have been used as the default explanation for virtually all chronic diseases, and yet, the science of epigenetics has all but debunked medicine’s favorite catch-all excuse for disease when there is no other viable explanation to offer. More and more, science is discovering that the difference in health between people isn’t due nearly as much to what they’re eating or doing, as to what they’re thinking and feeling.

Expectations & Outcomes Socrates said, “There is no illness of the body apart from the mind,” and yet modern medicine ignores the fact that as humans, we inhabit a mind-body mechanism. There’s an almost industry-wide refusal within the healthcare community to entertain the idea that what we think can

affect our health, even though we’ve had decades of scientific proof (e.g., the placebo effect) attesting to this fact.

The New England Journal of Medicine published a famous study about patients who received orthopedic surgery for debilitating knee pain. One group of people underwent a real surgery for their pain, and a second group underwent a sham “surgery” in which minor incisions were made on the knee, while they watched a video of a different patient’s real surgery. One third of the patients receiving the real surgery experienced total pain relief. Amazingly the exact same percentage, 33%, of the patients who had the sham surgery experienced total pain relief, as well.1 In fact, through follow-up interviews, it was discovered that their pain relief lasted for many years, and that they had even better results than the surgery group. This is probably because their knees never experienced the invasive trauma of the actual procedure.2 These people experienced total recovery because they believed the “surgery” they were getting would provide it, and their mind-body mechanism did the rest.

Mind-Body Connection Here are a few more examples of the mind-body connection at work in healing: Nearly 50% of patients with asthma experience relief from a fake inhaler or sham acupuncture.3 A sugar pill or other inert substance will provide pain relief to 40% of people with headaches.4 Fake fertility “medication” helps 40% of couples conceive.5 Placebos are nearly as good at relieving pain as morphine.6 Many studies have shown placebos work just as well or even better at mood stabilization than anti-depressants.7,8 Is it just with pain and minor ailments that the mind is a powerful factor in healing the body? Not at all. The Spontaneous Remission Project details more than 3,500 cases covered in more than 800 journals, in which people inexplicably recovered from countless “terminal” cancers, diseases, and infections.9

Every emotion (as well as combination of emotions) carries a specific vibration that resonates within us at the cellular level affecting how our bodies function.

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

So, if the mind plays a significant role in helping us get well, can its power also be used to make us sick? The answer is yes, and we’re doing it all the time.

Mind-Body Pitfall The power of our mind can also be used to make us sick.

Research from Carnegie Mellon University has shown that the lower people believe their quality of health to be, the higher their susceptibility to sickness is, and that they get sick more often.10 A large study compared 30,000 Chinese Americans with Caucasian Americans and found that the Chinese died up to five years earlier if they had an illness and a birth year that together were considered to be an ill-fated combination by Chinese astrology and Chinese medicine. The more they adhered to this traditional belief, the sooner they died. This difference remained the same even when genetics, lifestyle, and other variables were taken into consideration.11 Asthmatics wheezed and became short of breath after inhaling nothing but saline mist when they were told it contained allergens. Even their bronchi constricted. After being given an inhaler with the exact same saline mist inside, which they were told was medicine, their breathing was restored to normal.12 Nearly 100% of people going under surgery who want to die in order to reunite with a loved one who has passed, actually die, along with a very large percentage of people who are convinced they won’t survive their surgery.13

Intimate Issues & Insight Because the mind and body are intimately connected, it isn’t just what we think about our physical bodies or medical care that affects our health, but what we think about everything. In fact, to be more specific, our physical health is affected not so much by what we’re thinking, but by how those thoughts make us feel. Every emotion (as well

126

as combination of emotions) carries a specific vibration that resonates within us at the cellular level affecting how our bodies function. Thus, ultimately creating health or disease.

This is perhaps why the biggest danger to our overall health is not lack of exercise or a bad diet, but the unresolved grudges, anger, resentment, shame, and fear we suppress and hold within ourselves, sometimes for years on end.

As a 20-year cancer survivor who has done the necessary emotional work related to my mind-body disease, I can tell you the reason cancer returns to any patient isn’t because the surgeon didn’t “get it all out,” but because there are still unresolved emotional issues within the patient that continue to resonate with and reproduce it. This is why, after examining new patients and reviewing their medical documentation, I focus a great deal more attention on the psycho-spiritual aspect of their healing plan. I ask them about the quality of their relationships, their upbringing, how they feel about their parents, if they have a healthy sex life, a fulfilling job, if they have an outlet to express their creativity, and so on.

All of these aspects of a person’s life make up what I call the spiritual nutrition that feeds the soul. A lack in any one of these vital nutrients upsets the ease in a person’s life and sets the stage for eventual dis-ease to be manifested in the body. The condition of the physical body is the external printout of what’s going on with a person on the psychospiritual level. Naturally, it’s the answers to these questions that provide me with more insight into what a patient needs to heal than all their medical records combined. In most cases, the patient already knows what he or she needs to process in order to heal. I work with patients to help them bring the issues that need resolving and healing to the forefront of their minds.

Mind-Body Manifestations A patient named, “Lisa” came to me suffering from severe rheumatoid arthritis, an auto-immune condition in which the body attacks its own joints. She was in so much pain, she’d been taking large doses of methotrexate, a powerful painkiller normally prescribed to cancer patients. Because Lisa’s body was attacking itself, I suspected her dis-ease was connected to long suppressed feelings of guilt of some kind for which she subconsciously felt she needed to be punished.

One day in my office, she broke down in tears and shared with me that in the recent past she’d had a 6-month affair while her husband was away on business. It was shortly after the affair ended that her symptoms began. I told Lisa that the time had come to stop punishing herself and be honest with her husband. It wasn’t easy, but Lisa told her husband what had happened. He chose to stay with her and go through counseling. As Lisa’s burden of guilt lifted over time, she responded better and better to treatment until she was finally able to eliminate all her medications, including methotrexate.

When I met “Macy” she’d been on antibiotics for 17 years. What began as constant urinary tract infections, eventually turned into a massive infection called interstitial cystitis that spread up into the bladder and throughout the

One of the most important health prevention practices all people can embrace is learning to support themselves and each other emotionally and spiritually. vaginal region, causing all the tissue to become sclerotic, dry, thin, and very rigid. This inflammatory condition is extremely painful, quite rare, and makes intercourse virtually impossible. In addition to antibiotics, Macy was also taking steroids, morphine, and an occasional epidural for her excruciating pain.

I’ve found that problems in the urogenital organs usually represent unresolved feelings related to sexual issues, intimate relationships, or sexual abuse. In working with Macy, I discovered that the only attention she’d ever received from her father was negative attention, and that she’d been raped by an older boy in her early teens. All this negative male attention caused Macy to confuse love from men with punishment—punishment she felt she deserved.

In light of this information, it made sense to me that Macy’s body would attack itself in this specific way, while at the same time armoring her genital region with sclerotic hard tissue making sex impossible so men couldn’t hurt her sexually anymore. I worked with Macy for nearly two years, treating her body while helping her reframe her ideas about men and masculinity. I also reintroduced her to the idea that she could experience healthy sensuality in a loving context, and assert herself in the bedroom without feeling shame or fear. Macy worked very hard to resolve her deep feelings of alienation, and was rewarded with a complete recovery - no more urinary tract infections or medications of any kind - as well as a healthy and fulfilling sex life.

Mutual Support as Medicine The mind-body doesn’t have a sense of humor; it takes everything you say literally and is especially attentive to the real feelings behind the joke. Making fun of yourself, especially your body, often hides unresolved negative feelings that need to be addressed. Friends and media images are powerful influences that often cause many women and men to compare themselves to each other and generate long lasting feelings of inadequacy, jealousy, notenoughness, and self-hatred. These feelings are not simply benign insubstantial responses or reflexes, but real flowing energy inside the body that creates measurable changes at the cellular level. One of the most important health prevention practices all people can embrace is learning

to support themselves and each other emotionally and spiritually. When we lift each other up, when we lovingly support ourselves and others, we generate positive feelings that go much further toward good health than any diet or exercise regimen. Our thoughts about ourselves, experiences, and others literally shape the health of our bodies.

SOURCES (1) Moseley, Bruce et al. (2002). A controlled trial of arthroscopic surgery for osteoarthritis of the knee. New England Journal of Medicine. 347, 81-88.

(2) Talbot, Margaret, “The Placebo Prescription”, New York Times Magazine, January 9, 2000.

(3) Weschler, Michael et al. (2011). Active Albuterol or placebo, sham acupuncture or no intervention in asthma. New England Journal of Medicine, 365, 119-126.

(4) de Groot, Femke et al. (2011). Headache: the placebo effects in the control groups in randomized clinical trials, an analysis of systematic reviews, Journal of Manipulative and Physiological Therapeutics, 34(5), 297-305.

(5) Wang, Shirley, “Why Placebos Work Wonders”, Wall Street Journal, July 10, 2012. http://www.wsj.com/articles/SB100014240 52970204720204577128873886471982.

(6) Levine, J et al. (1981). Analgesic responses to morphine and placebo in individuals with postoperative pain, Pain, 10(3), 379-389.

(7) Kirsh, Irving, The Emperor’s New Drugs: Exploding the antidepressant myth, Basic Books, New York, 2010.

(8) Vedantam, Shankar, Against Depression, a Sugar Pill is Hard to Beat: Placebos improve mood, change brain chemistry, in majority of trials of anti-depressants, Washington Post, May 7, 2002.

(9) Hirshberg, Caryle, O’Regan, Brendan, Spontaneous Remission: an annotated bibliography, Institute of Noetic Sciences, Petaluma, CA, (1993), http://library.noetic.org/library/publication-bibliographies/ spontaneous-remission.

(10) Rea, Shilo, Self-Rated Health Predicts Immune Response to the Common Cold, Carnegie Mellon University News, November 9, 2015, http://www.cmu.edu/news/stories/archives/2015/november/ self-rated-health.html.

(11) Phillips, D. et al, (1993), Psychology and survival, Lancet, 342(8880), 1142-1145.

(12) Schacter, S., Singer, J, (1962), Cognitive, Social and Physiological Determinants of Emotional State, Psychological Review, 69(5), 379-399.

(13) Reid, Brian, “The Nocebo Effect: The placebo effect’s evil twin”, The Washington Post, April 30, 2002.

127

ROOM TO GROW

Understanding how the culture of female friendships can help or hinder personal growth B Y

128

D R .

H A B I B

S A D E G H I

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

ecently, I was giving a presentation to a group of women at a company in London when the topic of relationships came up - not with men but between women. We discussed the unique dynamic of friendships between women and the challenges that come with them. Because women are more social than men, they tend to hang out with groups of friends. It’s rare to see four, five, or six men in each other’s company, unless they’re playing some kind of sport.

Most of the time, men are either content to be on their own, or have a buddy tag along to participate in whatever they happen to be doing. Science tells us that, on average, men tend to be more productive working alone, while women thrive on collaboration and work better within groups.

Because women have the gift of social connection, and associate more in groups, friendships among women tend to exist within a specific culture or environment to which all those involved belong. The health of this environment determines not only the psycho-spiritual health of the friendships, but of each woman as well. The environment in which friendships between women take place is made up of the language they use, how they refer and relate to each other, preconceived notions about themselves and life, and their personal history together.

It’s the quality of these elements that will either keep the women shallow and small or allow them to grow and expand in their ability to support each other in becoming greater versions of themselves.

physically if the issue can’t be resolved any other way. For women, the community is used to shame or shun the targeted woman by using mostly behind-the-back tactics, and verbal rather than physical abuse. It can become a drama that drags on for quite some time. For the fairer sex, women can be pretty vicious. In fact, I know of women who’ve said for that very reason, that they’d much rather work in an office full of men than one with only women. It seems that much of the time, the people who are the hardest on women are other women.

For the odd woman out, the result of her exclusion is a lot of self-hatred and selfdoubt. The judgments and comparisons that occur within the environment of female friendships can take a heavy toll on a woman’s self-esteem. Chronic stress like this always has an impact on physical health. I’ve seen it far too many times with my patients.

Because I firmly believe in the mindbody connection, I’ve often suspected

Because the primary relationship we have is always with ourselves, how we treat others is often a reflection of how we’re treating ourselves inside.

Exclusionary Tactics Sometimes groups of female friends can find themselves inhabiting a toxic space together. Because they are social, women often fight with each other by employing the power of the group. One woman will get her friends to take her side in a disagreement with another, and then as a group, exclude that woman. You might say that women hunt together in packs like a pride of lionesses. This tactic usually results in one person being the odd woman out.

This is in contrast to men, who usually handle things one-on-one, offering to “take it outside” and settle things

that self-hatred of this kind in women plays a part in auto-immune diseases, where the immune system sees the body as the enemy and attacks its own tissues.

Most people don’t know it, but of the 23.5 million Americans suffering from autoimmune disease, 75% are women.1 When we look at specific diseases, the ratio between women and men is even worse: Hashimoto’s thyroiditis: 10:1, Grave’s disease, 7:1 and lupus, 9:1.2 In 2000, a study published in the American Journal of Public Health declared that autoimmune disease surpassed the 10th leading cause of death in women between ages 15 and 64.3 The reason these statistics aren’t reported is because of the limited way cause of death is determined. Other autoimmune diseases like rheumatoid arthritis are only

considered contributors to death and never the actual cause.

Evolution of Relationships Friendship for all of us, including women, can be mutually fulfilling and supportive as long as we’re aware of the kind of culture or environment we’re creating around our friendships. To do this, it helps to understand how a relationship evolves. Any relationship between two or more people is considered a symbiotic association - sym means together, biosis means life. In a relationship, two lives are coming together to relate to each other in some way that affects their existence.

I call this a symbiotic constellation.

PARASITIC SYMBIOSIS

Relationships always begin in what’s called the parasitic phase.

Keep in mind these are normative terms, so they’re neither good nor bad, they just are. In parasitic symbiosis, we tend to take from the other person without any real thought of giving back. This is true in romantic relationships as well as friendships. When we meet someone new, we’re largely concerned with how fun they are and if we enjoy being around them. We’re excited to have someone new to go out with so we don’t have to go everywhere alone. We generally think about how others can enhance or benefit our lives, but we do not necessarily think about how we might contribute to their experience. People who get stuck in this phase become “takers,” never allowing themselves to grow and mature in the relationship. This is a sort of infantile phase and can be likened to a baby in the womb taking nutrients from its mother, while not contributing much to its mother’s well-being.

COMPETITIVE SYMBIOSIS

Once the baby is born and comes into the world, the relationship with its mother transitions from parasitic to competitive symbiosis.

Now that it is a separate being, the baby competes with the mother for the same food, time, attention, and so on. Similarly, as new friends become more familiar to us, we become less reliant on needing C O N T I N U E D

C O N T I N U E D

them so we can feel a certain way or do certain things, and we move into competition with them. Men tend to compete by comparing their achievements. Women usually compete by comparing themselves to each other, and for romantic partners. This competitive attitude can sometimes be overt, but it’s usually very subtle, creating only an undertone in the friendship. Getting stuck here leads to resentment, jealousy and antagonism, and if the competition continues to increase, it can bring about the end of the friendship.

The interesting thing about competitive consciousness is that it’s really ourselves we’re competing against. When we compare ourselves with others, we often end up feeling we’re not good enough or successful enough, so we sometimes end up competing overtly with people in our outer world to compensate for our internal feelings of inadequacy.

Because the primary relationship we have is always with ourselves, how we treat others is often a reflection of how we’re treating ourselves inside.

competitive, and commensal constellations and move into a mutually supportive and fulfilling relationship. We understand that the relationship we have with ourselves serves as a filter through which we see others, and directly affects the thoughts, words, and behaviors that create the environment in which we co-exist with our friends. Giving is as satisfying as getting, and we are secure enough in ourselves to celebrate the success of others knowing that our joy on their behalf elevates the group dynamic and contributes to everyone reaching her highest potential.

Women usually compete by comparing themselves to each other, and for romantic partners.

This competitive attitude can sometimes be overt, but it’s usually very subtle, creating only an undertone in the friendship.

COMMENSAL SYMBIOSIS

As the relationship moves into commensal symbiosis, the need to compete dissolves into a sort of live and let live association, where we may not be giving anything to the other person or competing with them, but we’re not taking anything from them either. We’re simply allowed to be ourselves and live our own lives. We might liken this phase to the barnacle that attaches itself to a whale - while it’s not giving anything to the whale, it’s not taking anything from it either. It’s just coexisting with it, going along for the ride. It’s sort of an uninvolved apathy; neither party is fulfilled.

MUTUALISTIC SYMBIOSIS

The final phase of relationship is mutualistic symbiosis. I invite everyone, but especially women, to strive for this kind of structure in their relationships. Here we mature beyond the selfishness, insecurity, and apathy of the parasitic,

A Friend Indeed Each phase of relationship or constellation has its own energy, language, and dynamic, as well as its own effect on the physical and spiritual well-being of the individual and the group. If we are conscious as we enter new relationships, we can pass through these initial phases rather quickly and avoid much trouble for ourselves and our circle of friends. This requires, of course, self-awareness. I encourage women to examine the challenges they face in their external relationships, and in a dispassionate way explore how they might be judging, neglecting, deceiving, or hurting themselves in similar ways.

When we heal these unconscious issues, our perception of ourselves and the world around us changes. By extension, we naturally conduct ourselves in a way that’s mutually supportive of everyone in our social circle. We use words and take actions that are positive and help make our relationships deeper and richer experiences. At the end of the day, in order to be a true friend, you’ve got to be your own best friend.

So, how are you treating yourself?

SOURCES (1) American Autoimmune and Related Diseases, Inc. (n.d.). Autoimmune Statistics. Retrieved from http://www.aarda.org/autoimmune-information/autoimmune-statistics/ (2) Autoimmunity In Wikipedia. Retrieved from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autoimmunity (3) Walsh , S. (2000). Autoimmune diseases: A leading cause of death among young and middle-aged women in the united states. American Journal of Public Health, 90, 1463-1465.

Love & Unity Bringing people together in sacred partnership Many people don’t know it, but my beautiful wife, Sherry and I became ordained ministers five years ago.

We chose to do so as a way to continue to be of service to others and deepen our understanding of this great spiritual journey we’re all taking together.

Since our ordination, we’ve experienced quite a few blessings, one of which is being asked to perform wedding ceremonies. It’s been an absolute joy to be able to bring couples together in a way that unites them both in life and in spirit. As the happy couples express their love for each other, it’s a wonderful opportunity for Sherry and I to reflect on our commitment to one another, as well. We love sharing our experiences with the newlyweds, and learning from them, too. We discuss the importance of nesting, especially if children will be part of the new household and love incorporating them into the service. Don’t be shy about asking us to officiate your wedding or even renewal of vows. Schedules permitting, we would be deeply grateful that you have asked us to share in one of the most significant spiritual moments of your journey.

L E A R N

M O R E

info@behiveofhealing.com

MEDITATION JA N

FEB

M AY

J UN

SEP

OC T

MINUTES

ANNUAL DOSE OF INSPIRATION FROM BE HIVE OF HEALING’S L.I.G.H.T.

MAR

AP R

JUL

AUG

NOV

DEC

How to Have a Miserable Marriage

10 Steps F

e

a t

u

r

e

d

to guarantee you’re happily never after

o

n

By Dr. Habib Sadeghi

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

ccording to the Google Books Project, so far 129,864,880 books have been published1 since the beginning of, well… publishing, and over half of them are about how to improve your marriage. Okay, that second part was mine, but it certainly seems like it. Everywhere we turn these days, it seems we are being inundated with books and talk show gurus (who also have books) telling us how to improve or save our marriages with more intimacy, better sex, communication, blah, blah, blah. Of course, there are couples out there who are genuinely seeking to improve their marriages, but what about the hundreds of millions of people actively engaged in ruining their relationships?

Don’t they deserve equal time and attention? Walk into a shopping mall, restaurant, or any public place and look around. You’ll see lots of people who really, really want a miserable marriage. It’s obvious from their petty griping and peevish attitudes that they’re working very hard to take their marriage from tedious to terrible. The problem is that they just don’t know how to get there.

Finally, help has arrived. How to Have a Miserable Marriage is an easy-to-understand guide on the most effective ways you can absolutely guarantee yourself a relationship free of even the smallest amount of happiness. As you master each one of these skills, you’ll find that it’s never been easier to maximize your misery by taking passive aggression and power struggles to a whole new level. No touchy-feely psycho-babble here, just real tools you can use to increase the dread and drama you’re already addicted to. The good news is that you’re probably subconsciously sabotaging your marriage in one or two of these ways right now, so you’re ahead of the game!

Better yet, you’ll learn how to multiply your marital misery right up to the boiling point without actually ending in divorce. What would be the point? After the knockdown-dragout divorce is over, where would you

get your misery fix? Of course, you could start a new relationship, but you’d have to go through that boring phase where you pretend to like each other, or God forbid, you could end up actually enjoying each other, and that would mean the end of misery. No, divorce is not an option, but threatening divorce repeatedly, certainly is.

These universal principles have proven effective in ruining marriages from generation to generation in spite of race, creed, culture, and even time. In fact, this guide is based on empirical evidence from a new research report that has the behavioral science world buzzing, Quantifying Misery in the Marriage State: A longitudinal study since the birth of mankind. If your desire is to turn your marriage into a joyless slog through three or more decades, after which you’ll deeply regret your wasted youth, then the old ways are the best ways.

Everyone knows that marriage takes work, and there’s a misconception out there that miserable spouses don’t work on their marriages at all. On the contrary, it takes far more effort and energy to sulk, scream, seethe, slam doors, criticize, complain, threaten, and withhold than it does to plan a date night once in a while. No, miserable spouses work much harder than their sappy, sentimental counterparts, and they wouldn’t have it any other way. This guide offers them insight into the unique opportunities at specific stages of the marriage to make their life together even more miserable. You can accelerate your aggravation if you know how to take advantage of these particularly vulnerable times.

If you’re lucky enough to have made one of two crucial bad decisions at the beginning of your marriage, you’re virtually assured it will be all downhill from the get go.

We’ll also cover what to do when you can’t use the children as the source of your arguments anymore, and how to irritate your spouse into old age, even when your health is failing.

1. False Starts

Marry for the wrong reasons, or marry the wrong person If your marriage begins in a positive way, then you’ve got your work cut out for you, but there’s no need to fear. You’ll soon learn lots of foolproof ways to suck the life right out of your marriage and end up feeling like bickering roommates. If, however, you’re lucky enough to exercise bad judgment in one of two essential ways before the marriage, you’ll put your misery-making on autopilot. You won’t believe how much angst and aggravation will arise out of the marriage arrangement itself. This will take a lot of the pressure to consciously ruin your marriage off your shoulders, because misery will be inevitable from Day One. The absolute guarantee of a miserable marriage is to begin it badly, and all you have to do to accomplish this is to make one (or preferably both) of these crucial mistakes.

Marry for the wrong reasons The best-worst reason to get married is to do it to avoid something else. In this frame of mind, you’ll be sure to choose your partner impulsively. Fear is a great motivator, and it will help you see your future spouse as nothing more than a means to an end in order to escape a bad situation.

The possibilities are endless. You could marry to avoid poverty, having to work, family pressure, loneliness, your biological clock running out, etc. As long as you’re getting what you need and have thoroughly convinced yourself that you’ll learn to love this person eventually, you’ll experience marriage meltdown almost immediately after the honeymoon. This is because you’ve been clever

135

enough to arrange a marriage that has no real purpose. You’ve now made it utterly impossible to enjoy your spouse’s company because you didn’t choose him or her for that reason. Bravo! To maximize your misery from the get go, you might also consider the following terrible reasons to get married: all your friends are getting married, your ex is engaged, you’re pregnant, it’s the “next logical step” in your relationship, it’s lust and not love, you’re getting older and your options are running out, invitations were sent and you’ve already paid for the wedding.

Marry the wrong person Marrying the wrong person will also guarantee a miserable marriage because you and your spouse will constantly be out of sync and on separate wavelengths even before you say, “I Do.” This isn’t rocket science, and you certainly don’t need to apply any psychological evaluations to make sure you’re marrying the wrong person. You can get a great head start by choosing someone of the wrong religion, culture, race, or social class. You could also up the ante by making sure there’s a wide age difference between you and your partner, preferably by one or more generations.

Before you settle on this person as your object of irritation, it’s imperative that your relationship meet two criteria. This person must have a list of faults that are the opposite of yours, and immediately upon getting married, you must commit all your energy to changing them. A classic example is the hardworking but overly-serious woman who finds herself attracted to the free-spirited “bad boy.”

She admires his freedom and confidence, and thinks his non-traditional ways will help her loosen up and let go. He’s thinking her more conservative approach to life will help him settle down, and provide some future security. After the wedding is over and the fascination wears off, she’s insisting that he get a “real” job to help pay bills, stop drinking so much, and be more responsible. He’s telling her to not be a conservative stick-in-the-mud and to stop being so cheap. You might also want to consider one of these classically clashing partnerships: the domineering wife and the wimpy husband, the slob and the neat freak, or the tender heart and the emotionally unavailable.

Marrying the wrong person will also guarantee a miserable marriage because you and your spouse will constantly be out of sync and on separate wavelengths even before you say, “I Do.”

2. Awkward Assumptions Expect your spouse to “complete” you

If you’re not lucky enough to marry the wrong person or marry for the wrong reason, one of the best ways to make frustration the foundation of your marriage is to expect your partner to be all things to you—your lover, teacher, entertainer, protector, healer, cheerleader, self-esteem builder, psychotherapist, and parent. It’s also crucial that you make your happiness their personal responsibility.

It’s very important to thoroughly convince yourself that you weren’t “complete” until your spouse came into your life. That way, you’re absolutely sure to have kneejerk reactions - clinginess, neediness, or suspicion - each time your spouse wants to spend an evening out with friends (something he or she needs to do in order to remember that there is a life outside of your suffocating clutches).

Ignore the fact that it’s really impossible for two people to become one anyway, and insist that your spouse spend all his or her time outside of work and the bathroom with you. Remember, your happiness always comes from something outside yourself, and when that emotionally airbrushed god or goddess walks into your life, everything will be right in your world. Be sure to reinforce this delusion by watching as many movies based on Nicholas Sparks books as possible. That way, every human mistake your partner makes will be a massive disappointment to you, providing endless

136

opportunities for you to point out all his or her shortcomings.

If you really want to add some progressive 21st century pressure to your marriage, buy into the social engineers’ idea that men and women are the same, and that the difference between the sexes is just a social construct. Forget all that junk science about biology and chromosomes, and assume that it has absolutely nothing to do with why your opposite sex spouse thinks and behaves differently than you. They’re doing it just to get on your nerves. Violently resist all the scientific research showing that the brains of men and women are wired completely differently2, and all that Mars and Venus stuff is for real. Quick, someone call Quackwatch!

Instead, your job is to insist with the relentless consistency of Chinese water torture that your husband be more vulnerable, express his feelings, want to cuddle, love to go shopping, and enjoy hours of talking, or that your wife should want to have sex five nights a week, turn off immediately after your orgasm, stop talking so much, hate shopping, and not be so emotional. In other words, keep expecting your man to be more like a woman and your woman to be more like a man. When your spouse continues to fail miserably at overriding his or her biology, you’ll have lots of opportunities to feel neglected, pressured, and nagged. Don’t bother working with the differences between the sexes because they’re entirely unnatural and wrong. Keep dreaming the impossible dream that your opposite sex partner will become more like you to fulfill the needs you should be satisfying elsewhere, and you’ll have Mars/Venus misery that’s worthy of the gods.

3. Cross-Talk

Make no real effort to actually communicate Miscommunication is the cornerstone of a miserable marriage. Your job is to ensure that your spouse has no idea what it is you’re trying to say. This is your soulmate, right? You’re supposed to be of one mind and one heart, totally in tune with each other, so much so that you know what the other is going to say even before you say it. In that case, why express your needs at all? In fact, don’t say anything and just expect your spouse to read your mind. When it’s painfully obvious that your spouse isn’t psychic, you can attack him or her like a neglected child. Insist that because he or she couldn’t read your unvoiced, repressed emotions (as if they run like a tickertape across your forehead), he or she couldn’t possibly understand or love you. Do your best to let as much time go by as possible while you wait for your oblivious spouse to catch on to your clueless display of emotional distress. When sufficient time has passed, your resentment will be under such pressure that it will explode all over your spouse in a nuclear display of needy self-righteousness.

Other valuable miscommunication tools to use in place of actual words include the heavy sigh, eye roll, disinterested tone, and pouty silence. These vague, adolescent behavioral ticks are sure to be completely lost on your spouse, but you’ll be able to argue later that the signs were glaringly obvious that something was bothering you, and he or she should have seen it immediately. The point is to never, ever say what you really mean. Be suggestive, brooding, forlorn, or silent; just be anything but literal and your marriage will be permanently lost in translation.

If real communication should accidentally happen, you can short circuit the process by constantly expressing how you feel about something but never what you want to actually do about it. As an added bonus, never miss an opportunity to criticize without offering any alternative suggestions.

There’s no such thing as picking your battles if your goal is to create a miserable marriage. No issue is too small that it can’t be blown up into a huge argument, and you should take every opportunity to do so.

4. Evading Accountability Never admit it’s your fault

There’s nothing more excruciatingly miserable than being married to a victim. That’s because in order to continually reinforce his or her identity, every self-proclaimed victim needs a bad guy, and who better to accuse of being the oppressor but his or her spouse. When you master the blame game, you’ll see how easy it is to keep your partner’s head spinning between utter confusion and self-imposed guilt for things he or she never said or did. Victimhood 101 is the quickest way to create your own reality and live in a dream world that’s totally free of personal responsibility. It’s also your bulletproof protection against any form of compromise, and ensures that none of your problems ever really get solved. Don’t believe a word of that nonsense about how we subconsciously project our faults outward onto other people. Repeat after me: It’s always someone else’s fault. Always.

just implying you’re having an affair can fill your spouse’s mind with endless miserable paranoia.

Become overly flirty with co-workers of the opposite sex. This is sure to prompt personal phone calls, texts, and emails at home.

5. Creating Conflict Fight often, and fight to win

There’s no such thing as picking your battles if your goal is to create a miserable marriage. No issue is too small that it can’t be blown up into a huge argument, and you should take every opportunity to do so. Your spouse not being able to read your mind is a perfect opportunity to go from sulking self-pity to self-righteous rage in an instant.

If you weren’t fortunate enough to marry the wrong person or marry for the wrong reasons, much conflict can still be created in the early years of the marriage by letting the in-laws freely intrude into your lives. Allow them to loan you money for the down payment on a house or employ your spouse at your father’s company. Agree to pay some of your in-laws’ bills, or rent a house just down the street from them. With your mother-in-law close by, it will be easy for her to regularly drop in (unannounced, of course) and guide you in the proper ways to take care of her baby boy, and a lot of other things, too. At the same time, your father-in-law will be able to subtly remind you over and over again that your family only survives because of his generosity and not the lack of employability of your husband. If you’re a man, you’ve got a special advantage to starting in-law arguments. Just make mom the primary woman in your life. Drop everything when she calls and see how quick your wife resents playing second fiddle to Mommy Dearest.

138

The goal in any argument is to make sure nothing gets changed so you can revisit the subject and argue about it again and again. The two best ways to ensure a solution never arises in an argument is to either withdraw into a sulking pity party or escalate it into an opportunity for a dramatic doorslamming exit. Be sure to confuse love with emotion because we all know that lots of drama and emotions flying around are what make a marriage feel “alive.” When arguing, always keep it personal with lots of insults and name calling. Feel free to go off on tangents and dredge up past issues that have nothing to do with the matter at hand. A kitchen sink approach to arguing is the perfect way to bury your spouse in belligerence. It’s also the best possible diversion for rerouting the shouting match when you know your point of view in the argument is simply indefensible.

Remember these quick tips. Never allow your spouse to finish a sentence. Cross-talk is kryptonite to real listening. If you must stop yelling for longer than the amount of time it takes to draw a breath, only pretend to listen while using that time to secretly plan in your head what you’re going to say next. The louder you say something, the more you’ll be understood. Commit to memory even the smallest failings of your spouse, because it’s all potential ammunition, and never back down because winning is everything.

6. Eliminating Intimacy

Use sex as a reason to punish or avoid your spouse Sexual desire is one of the most powerful human urges that drive behavior. If you can manage to make your sex life truly awful, then nature will do the rest in magnifying your marital misery exponentially. The easiest way to go from flirtation to friction is to screw up the sexual timing between you and your spouse. The basic idea is to always initiate sex at the wrong time, in the wrong place, with the wrong frequency, or in the wrong way. Any beginner can easily include one of these wrongs when approaching a spouse for sex, but misery masters use them all over the course of a marriage, creating lots of sexual frustration. Always want sex when your spouse is not interested or occupied with something else. Insist on having sex on the living room floor thirty minutes before the kids are supposed to get home from school, or suggest sexual positions where you can both watch TV at the same time.

After the wife complains about her husband’s lack of planning, he gets to accuse her of turning into a frigid, sexless, housefrau. The bonus to screwing up the location, timing, and frequency of sex is that it adds a lot of rushed tension and stress to the moment, completely obliterating any possibility of intimacy occurring during your doomed interaction. To kill intimacy easily, always keep your attention on anything but each other during sex… if you actually get that far.

In keeping with the marriage misery principle of marrying the wrong person, you’ll have this step covered if you’re fortunate enough to marry someone who has a sex drive that’s the complete

opposite of yours. Other great ways to create a miserable marriage and sex life include the cold shoulder - arousing your partner and then inexplicably losing interest in the heat of the moment. The emasculator requires that you never tell your husband what actions work for you sexually and then blame him for not being able to please you. Of course, this should only happen after years of faking orgasms, so sufficient frustration has built up between the two of you.

Never miss an opportunity to use sex as a weapon by withholding it from your partner. This has a particularly insidious effect on a marriage, and if things work out right, may lead to a completely sexless partnership or an affair, which we’ll cover later.

One of the best ways to eliminate sex and all intimacy from your marriage, and make it look like a natural progression, is to begin going to bed at a different time than your spouse. As your bedtime gradually moves further from your spouse’s, it’s virtually certain that this sexual avoidance will help you end up as one of the 15% of all married couples who suffer through a sexless marriage. Statistics show that very soon, you’ll lose all physical attraction to your spouse and ultimately behave like disaffected roommates.3 Way to go, misery maker! When all else fails, you can always fall back on some of the classic sex and intimacy killing excuses to avoid deepening your relationship, such as being too tired, too busy, having kid issues and of course, having the quintessential headache.

139

7. Money Mayhem

Have a different financial philosophy than your partner Generally speaking, research shows that we tend to be drawn to potential partners who are similar to us except when it comes to money. So if you’re a penny pincher that means you’re more than likely to end up with a frivolous spender. That’s excellent news for your miserable marriage, especially since most couples don’t even talk about financial habits and plans before marriage… and neither should you. Because money is the leading cause of conflict in 39% of marriages, and the secondary cause in 59%,4 you can’t afford to not take advantage of allowing money to ruin your marriage too.

If you’re the frivolous spender in your marriage, be sure to overspend, particularly on things you don’t need. This is especially important if you’re a non-working or the lesser earning spouse, so it will breed resentment from your hardworking partner. Be creative and find ways to hide purchases from your spouse. The impact will be much bigger when they get the credit card bill and it hits them all at once. Financial infidelity is a great way to erode trust in your marriage and as long as what you’re buying makes you happy, then it’s so worth it! Lending or borrowing from family members has so many strings attached that before you know it, you’ll be pulled in all directions, forced to choose between your spouse and family. Of course, hording your money and using none of it to actually enjoy your marriage, will go a long way toward moving your relationship into the gray zone.

And, never underestimate the power of accumulating debt (student loans, second mortgages, car payments, credit cards, etc.) to crush your marriage simply by its own weight.

8. Child’s Play

Use children to maintain or save your marriage

If you don’t have children and feel a potential divorce may be threatening your miserable future with freedom and happiness, it’s imperative that you have a child to save your marriage.

Not only will the baby not solve any of your problems, but it will put your misery into overdrive with about 1,000 new responsibilities for you and your spouse.

You’ve been doing the things we’ve discussed so far and creating a perfectly hellacious marriage for yourself, but you fear you might be headed in the direction of separation and a possible divorce. What to do? Not to worry. The easiest way to preserve your disintegrating relationship and sentence yourself to at least 18 more years of marital misery is to stay together “for the kids.” Guilt is a great motivator, and you should use it liberally on yourself. Think about the disadvantages your son will experience growing up without his verbally abusive, unemployable father as a role model. Can you imagine the permanent damage done to a daughter who isn’t blessed with the opportunity to make cherished memories with her alcoholic, passive-aggressive mother?

No, you must stay together for the children. Not only will this decision continue to take you to new levels of misery even you didn’t think you could handle, there’s an added bonus; it predisposes your children to choosing miserable marriage partners for themselves by subconsciously marinating in your resentment and bickering, day in and day out for the first two decades of their lives. Don’t worry about the therapy bills to come; it’s important to invest in their miserable future.

If you don’t have children and feel a potential divorce may be threatening your miserable future with freedom and happiness, it’s imperative that you have a child to save your marriage. Not only will the baby not solve any of your problems, but it will put your misery into overdrive with about 1,000 new responsibilities for you and your spouse… and that’s just when the baby is feeling well! This is highly recommended for young people who get married to escape their parents’ oppressive households.

If you’re a woman expecting a baby, focus all your attention on the child inside you to the complete exclusion of your husband. While he’s resenting his soon-to-be bundle of joy, he can leave you at home while partying with his buddies, reminding you of how much weight you’ve gained and how you don’t look as great as you used to. After the baby is born, it’s important to make your marriage all about the children.

Remember, you’re a bad parent if you even think about doing anything with your spouse away from the kids. Even when you talk to each other, it should always be about the children. Repeat after me: My spouse and I no longer serve any purpose outside our roles as parents.

9. Resentful Rendezvous Have an affair

When the kids are finally off creating their own relationship dramas in middle and high school, and there are no more diapers and croup to stress over, consider replacing the lost misery with an affair.

When it comes to extra-marital escapades, you’ve got options as to how much angst you want to create and how much effort you want to put into it.

the bitter affair This option will raise the most ill will between you and your spouse because it’s always with someone your spouse knows. The more intimate the relationship they have with this person, the better. Did someone say best friend? You could also go for a stranger, but be sure to choose someone who looks very similar to your spouse only 20 years younger, of course. It generates the most bitterness if they’re thinner and/or have a better physique. Always remember to ask yourself, “Who can I choose that would infuriate my spouse enough not to divorce me, but only to get even with me?”

the baffling affair Keep your spouse’s head spinning by choosing someone so inappropriate that it’s a complete mystery. If you’re a man with a fashionable, sophisticated wife, then go for a fat, tacky, uneducated lover. This keeps your spouse’s mind reeling as to what’s “wrong” with him or her that you would choose such a loser over them.

the budget affair If you don’t want to spend the money or time wining and dining a hot stud or fat slob, just implying you’re having an affair can fill your spouse’s mind with endless miserable paranoia. Become overly flirty with co-workers of the opposite sex. This is sure to prompt personal phone calls, texts, and emails at home. Get very friendly with some of your spouse’s friends, wait staff in restaurants you both frequent, or even total strangers in online chat rooms. Just be sure your spouse witnesses these interactions. A sudden change in hairstyle, dress, makeup, or cologne can go a long toward creating rampant insecurity and panic in your spouse.

Not only is technology a great way to put an electronic filter between you and the chance you might have an emotional connection with your spouse, it’s also a lazy and dismissive way of communicating with him or her.

10. Internet Escape

Abandon your spouse through technology Adding quiet desperation and alienation to your marriage has never been easier in the Information Age. Now you can completely abandon your spouse without having to leave the comfort of your own home, through the overuse of media gadgets and services like cell phones, computers, iPads, texting, email, Instagram, social networks, and so on. Why clue in to your real life marriage when you can check out into virtual reality?

Text or email your spouse as much as possible, because you’re just too busy to actually, well… you know, speak to him or her. The isolating nature of this way of communicating keeps you from hearing your spouse’s voice, responding to his or her energy, and even seeing his or her face.

Over time, electronic distancing does wonders to deteriorate relationships of all kinds, but especially marriages. Don’t take my word for it.

Oxford University researchers found that increasing communication between spouses using technology led to decreasing marital satisfaction.5 Not only is technology a great way to put an electronic filter between you and the chance you

CONTINUED

CONTINUED might have an emotional connection with your spouse, it’s also a lazy and dismissive way of communicating with him or her. If a Hallmark card says, “I love you,” then a text says, “I was too lazy, busy, or distracted to call you and actually well… talk. Besides, who can remember all those numbers anyway?” A text is the Post-It note of 21st century communication and should be used frequently to treat your spouse as an afterthought. So why risk being touched by the sound of your spouse’s contagious laughter when you can LOL and emoticon your way to texting WTF happened 2 my marriage? Never forget, technology transfers information, not emotion.

Emails and especially texts give you the ability to fight dirty. Never miss a chance to hit and run your partner with a nasty message and then refuse to answer his or her reply or simply turn your phone off for hours. It’s a fantastic cop out from having to actually defend your point of view, and it’s a constant reminder to your spouse that he or she is instantly disposable.

If you’re having dinner at home, at a restaurant, or are out and about with your spouse, it should be standard procedure to constantly “check in” with your smartphone to break the possibility of any extended connection happening between the two of you. If you’re stuck at home together, you should immediately consider wasting several hours on Facebook, YouTube, internet porn, or even video games as fully effective ways to ignore each other until you can declare Game Over on your relationship.

Abandoning your spouse in 21st century style sounds like a lot of work, but it really isn’t. In fact, your subconscious addiction to your various gadgets keeps you lost in cyberspace more than you think. Don’t believe me? Try making it through a three-day weekend without a cell phone or personal computer. A poll from The New York Times showed that 1 in 7 people said they spend less time with their partner because of media. Even more amazing, 1 in 10 openly admitted to spending less time with their children!6 So log on to your gadget, tune in to The Net and drop out of your marriage.

sources (1) Jackson, Joab. (2013). Google: 129 million

The Bitter End

This article was inspired by an original piece called How to Have an Awful Marriage by family and marriage psychotherapist, Jay Haley, whom I greatly admired. While I would never actually give this advice to any of the couples I mentor through my Couples Transformational Intensive (CT!) workshop, I marveled at Haley’s humorous un-self-help approach designed to help marriages succeed by showing couples the most common ways they fail. Often, knowing what not to do, goes much further toward solving marital problems or any problem, than being overwhelmed with too much information, or overthinking a situation. Life is often simpler than we think. So if learning how to have a miserable marriage can help you have a happy one instead, then I am overjoyed to have turned the time-honored self-help approach on its ear with the help of Dr. Haley. Just remember to invite me to your 50th wedding anniversary party!

different books have been published. PCWorld, IDG News, accessed January, 22, 2016, http://www. pcworld.com/article/202803/google_129_million_ different_books_have_been_published.html.

(2) Lewis, Tanya. (December 2, 2013). How men’s brains are wired differently than women’s. Scientific American. http://www.scientificamerican.com/ article/how-mens-brains-are-wired-differentlythan-women/.

(3) Flagg, Donna. (March 26, 2012). Sexless marriage is surprisingly common. Psychology Today, https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/officediaries/201203/sexless-marriage-is-surprisinglycommon.

(4) Morad, Renee. (October 12, 2012). 10 money mistakes that can ruin a marriage. MoneyTalk News. http://www.moneytalksnews.com/10-moneymistakes-that-can-ruin-a-marriage/.

(5) Social Media Study Finds Link Between Media Use And Relationship Satisfaction, The Huffington Post, (April 15, 2013), http://www.huffingtonpost. com/2013/04/15/social-media-study-finds_n_3086518.html.

(6) Connelly, M. (2010). More Americans sense a downside to an always plugged-in existence. The New York Times.

142

A Premier Couples Wellness Program

COUPLES TRANSFORMATIONAL INTENSIVE (CT!) Created exclusively for couples, this series of nine workshops is designed to reduce conflict, increase bonding and bring intimate partners closer together.

Creating Flexible Possibilities for Strong Couples that are Bendable!

Difficulties are addressed through accepting personal responsibility, identifying projections and unconscious emotional wounds, establishing empathy, practicing authentic communication and reinforcing understanding through perception checking.

The CT! bonding exercises increase physical contact, deepen intimacy and strengthen the primal subconscious bonds that tell couples they belong to each other. Participants regularly report dramatic improvements in their relationships after this series.

It’s not necessary to be having relationship difficulty to participate in CT!. Many couples with healthy relationships have participated to experience an even deeper level of love and commitment.

YOUR COUPLES TRANSFORMATIONAL INTENSIVE HEALING STARTS HERE L E A R N

M O R E

B E H I V E O F H E A L I N G .C O M / C T I

L I V

144

I N G

ON PURPOSE Heal your life and help the world by discovering what you were meant to do

By Dr. Sherry Sami

believe each person is born with a specific purpose, or an entelechy (something that is fully realized). Each one of us is guided through this lifetime by a force greater than ourselves that has blessed us with specific gifts to help us realize our purpose. Working toward the realization of our purpose during our lives is a divine act, not only because we are serving our individual purpose, but because we are also contributing to furthering the purpose of the human race. Just as the body creates trillions of cells, each with a specific function for the kidney, liver, heart, brain and so on, each of us has been created with a specific purpose within the body of humanity. In the same way that it takes each cell to perform its proper function for the body to be healthy, we too must do the necessary work to follow our individual purposes in order for our lives to be healthy and aligned with spirit, and the world as a whole.

In this infinite tapestry of divine acts, no one person or purpose is greater than another. Each is absolutely essential to the realization of the greater plan. We would never assume that a brain cell is more important than a liver cell, or that a bladder cell is inferior to a heart cell. Each person alive today is intimately interconnected with every other person through their individual purpose and how their personal and collective progress manifests this breathtaking experience we call life.

celebrities and public figures through my work. Since I’ve become friends with many of them, I’ve had the opportunity to get to know them on a more intimate level, which has been an enriching and educational experience for me. When we spend time together, I get a very clear sense that they’re doing exactly what they are meant to do in this life – that they are aligned with their purpose. It was all in the divine plan, and they simply surrendered to it by putting in the necessary work to move themselves in the direction their hearts were guiding them. That was the key that caused the universe to open all the right doors and align the stars to ensure that they would become the exact kind of cell they were meant to be in the body of humanity.

One of the most incredible things

It has truly been a blessing for me to become acquainted with so many

146

LETTING LOVE LEAD The most crucial step in discovering and serving your purpose is to release the ego and its idea of what success means. The ego is the part of you that feels that unless you do something enormous, you’re not worthy or good enough. It’s the part of you that feels more important when recognized by others, compares itself to other people, or feels less valuable if it doesn’t meet other people’s expectations.

When I listen to TV interviews with famous people like J.K. Rowling, author of the Harry Potter series; Elon Musk, Tesla Motors tycoon; or Steve Jobs, founder of Apple Computers, I am always amazed to learn that fame wasn’t really what they were after when they set out to fulfill their purpose. In their wildest dreams, it didn’t even occur to them.

They just followed their passion, what they loved to do, and they became who they became because that was what was meant for them. It was how they needed to be used by the universe for their highest good and the good of all.

In order to find our true path, it’s very important to release ourselves from the expectations and limitations set by others.

This takes courage.

PURPOSE & IMPORTANCE Unfortunately, our society is currently set up in such a way that it doesn’t respect, honor or even recognize the value of our vastly different purposes or journeys. It’s skewed to give much greater importance, attention, and influence to people and purposes that involve wealth, fame, power, and social status. Of course, that means love, compassion, and integrity get de-emphasized to a great degree. It’s no secret why our children choose the role models they do, and why young boys want to become the next famous athlete or rock star, and girls aspire to be models and actresses.

This is true for anyone else in this universe. We are no more or less than anyone else, regardless of how different our purposes may be. The human body, as well as the world, needs all its cells serving their designated purposes to function properly.

I’ve learned by having a wide variety of friends is that the world needs an Oprah just as much as it does a housekeeper who lives her life and does her job with love and integrity.

We needed a Kobe Bryant as much as the man who drives the garbage truck every Thursday in my neighborhood.

On this journey, the most important thing we must remember is to listen to our heart and follow where it leads us.

Rather than following in the footsteps of someone else’s dream or molding our lives around their purpose, the key to true fulfillment is finding out what our unique gifts are. Whatever we are meant to do in this world will be intimately connected to our passions and talents. Once we discover what we are meant to do, we must pursue

On the way to finding your purpose, exploring lots of different avenues is essential. As you’re doing that, learn to embrace the F-word: Failure.

it with all the love we have in our hearts. In order to find our true path, it’s very important to release ourselves from the expectations and limitations set by others. This takes courage, nevertheless it has been said that at the end of life it isn’t what we’ve done that we regret, but what we haven’t done.

ELIMINATING OBSTACLES Some people say they have no idea what their purpose is or what they’re supposed to be doing in life. The good news is that you do know what your purpose is. It just takes a little soul searching. What are the things you loved doing as a child that perhaps you still do today? What kinds of things or activities were involved in your imaginary playtime? What were the things you spent hours working on, never even noticing the time flying by? What do you feel the most free or joyful doing? In your life today, ask the people who know you well what activities you’re doing when you seem the most yourself.

Finding our path is as important as understanding and reconciling our childhood, which has substantial influence over how we emotionally process our life experiences and lessons. All of our experiences from childhood are here to teach us important soul lessons. Whether you had the perfect parents who did everything right, or parents who

yelled and screamed and said you were useless, you went through the lessons you were meant to experience in service to your journey and purpose. Sometimes, this can mean that as adults we carry wounds and issues that do not support our life goals. These issues can include unworthiness, abandonment, perfectionism, self-doubt, or the feeling that we are unlovable.

How we reconcile these lessons over a lifetime is the key to evolving spiritually and staying on track toward fulfilling our purpose. If we identify with these misperceptions instead of understanding that they are lessons for us to work through and grow from, our lives get stuck and we fall temporarily behind in achieving the divine destiny that is meant for us. If it takes us a lifetime to learn from these difficult early lessons and release these false self-concepts, we don’t become the full heart cell or adrenal cell we were meant to be.

We become a cell that is performing at less than full capacity because it hasn’t reached its destiny. If we buy into these misunderstandings, we can even become the cancer cell that causes disease and harm to all the other cells around it.

CONTRASTING CONTEXTS Whether you’re Taylor Swift, a doctor, or a shepherd in the mountains is irrelevant. It’s what you

bring forward in the world through your loving that constitutes a purpose driven life.

I will never forget the security guard who would sit outside the Citibank near my home. For nearly eight years, every time I went to that bank, I was met by his beaming smile and loving, generous spirit. To this day, my heart has his fingerprint on it. His joy was so palpable that I stopped and asked him once, “Is this what you always wanted to do in life? You look so happy all the time.” He answered so sweetly, “As long as I feel I’ve made a difference in one person’s life, in some small way, every day, I know I’ve done the job the Big Guy brought me here to do.”

I’ve also had experiences, as I’m sure you have, with people who are not following their purpose no matter how important they think they are.

I sadly remember sitting across the desk from a neurologist at UC San Diego Medical Center as he coldly read a possible differential diagnosis regarding my mother’s health crisis like he was reading the stock prices for the day. After he disregarded my request to slow down so I could have time to emotionally process all he was saying, I mentioned that his lack of empathy wasn’t helping matters.

He stoically replied that being compassionate wasn’t part of his job and that his only obligation to me was to provide me with the facts regarding

147

O

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

my mother. Here was a perfect example of someone who probably made a lot of money but clearly wasn’t serving his real purpose.

PERFECTION & PERSPECTIVE Once we discover our purpose and humbly commit to following that path, the universe conspires to help us. When an egg is fertilized by a sperm cell, it inherently knows its purpose is to create a baby, and so it moves forward toward that purpose organically and effortlessly. As they divide, the new cells don’t have to be forced into becoming skin or lung cells. They simply act in accordance with their purpose, which also serves the larger divine plan to make a baby.

Arms, legs, and everything else take shape without resistance in order to create a spectacular new life.

Sometimes, because of toxic exposure, imbalances, or genetic issues, a baby can be born that isn’t considered “perfect” because it has certain challenges. Who are we to say that everything isn’t unfolding perfectly with this child, that these

challenges aren’t part of its journey and purpose? When I was pregnant with my daughter, Hannah, my husband and I were told that the tests showed she had a hole in her heart. As difficult as it was to hear this news, we both accepted that whatever the outcome would be, it was part of our path and for our highest good, as well as the good of our daughter. I did my best to meditate every day. I asked for the divine mother’s strength and visualized a perfect heart for Hanna, while remaining detached from the outcome and surrendering to whatever would be. After a few weeks, with great astonishment, our neonatologist informed us that he couldn’t find the hole in Hannah’s heart anymore. Her heart was completely healthy.

This experience helped me greatly in working with my precious patients - some of whom are dealing with conditions like cerebral palsy, Down syndrome and autism – as well as their parents. I’ve held the hands of many crying mothers, asking them to consider the idea that their child’s condition is all in divine right order.

Nothing is wrong or needs to be fixed.

Perhaps the children came to this world offering their little bodies as a way for them and everyone around them to learn and grow. It seems that every time I speak to the parents, siblings, and doctors of these children, they’re sharing lessons they’re learned from them about compassion, patience, unconditional love, faith, living with real joy, and understanding what perfection really means.

When we see a child struggling mentally or physically, it might help to understand that their condition is part of their purpose. Just being able to consider this idea creates a shift in consciousness that begins to alleviate some of the sense of loss a parent feels in these situations. These children are also on this particular path in service to their parents’ growth. They place their fingerprints on our hearts, just as my patients have placed their fingerprints on mine, changing me in profound ways as a mother, healer, and friend.

They have taught me things I never learned in medical or dental school.

When I’m in their company, I know I’m in the presence of a master teacher, and realize that I’m witnessing a perfect process, not as humans define it, but as God does.

FAILURE AS A FRIEND

Finding our path is as important as understanding and reconciling our childhood, which has substantial influence over how we emotionally process our life experiences and lessons.

148

On the way to finding your purpose, exploring lots of different avenues is essential. As you’re doing that, learn to embrace the F-word: failure. That’s because failure doesn’t really exist, so there’s nothing to fear in the first place.

Failing at something is just feedback; it’s new information to begin again in another way, or to take a different direction. The only way we’re ever really stuck, is if we stop, sulk and don’t do anything. Every new development is more information, and as long as we keep moving, God will meet us at our point of action to keep steering us in the right direction. The path to your purpose is all course correction.

Just keep going! Success has often been reached by taking a misstep in the right direction.

Some people have a very specific purpose, like being a dancer, teacher, or writer. Others have a purpose that is less defined, or more expansive,

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

as in my case. I realized quite early in my career that my purpose isn’t really being a pediatric dentist or orthodontist. Considering all I do on a daily basis, that label doesn’t really fit me. It feels too limiting in some ways.

From nurturing children to comforting and educating parents, I see my job as a platform to accomplish my purpose, which is to raise consciousness, connect with others, inspire and enlighten, all in the service of helping families heal, especially overwhelmed moms.

By taking a holistic approach to health, I can also help identify hidden causes of chronic health problems and remove those obstacles, giving the child a better quality of life. Because I have a passion for learning, I’m always taking classes or expanding my knowledge in some way, often not realizing how this new information might impact a patient’s life until I’m in the office with them and the universe brings it to the forefront of my mind, once again

letting me know I’m on the right path.

LEARNING TO LISTEN It’s important to know that your purpose can change, too. Right now, I know I’m in the right place, serving in a capacity that fulfills me. The fact that my practice has grown so rapidly just by word-of-mouth, with no advertising, tells me that what I’m doing is touching people and that I’m on the right track. The universe is responding by giving me the support to do what I love to do. I also know I’m in the right place because when I’m at work, I forget about everything else. It’s almost like a form of meditation where nothing else exists but me, the child and how I can better serve him or her in honor of the larger, divine purpose.

Some days I’m so in the zone that I even forget to eat my lunch!

Will I be doing this for the rest of my life? Who knows? Every day I sit in my silent meditation and ask

how I can be of service. When I get a different answer, I’ll change as my place in the divine plan also changes.

All I ask is to be the flute through which the breath of Spirit blows its beautiful melodies, as the poet, Hafez, so eloquently reminds us. As a flute, I empty myself of judgments, fears, misunderstandings, negativity, and painful childhood memories. In this open space, I listen for the music of the universe and it flows through me as I perform my purpose with effortless virtuosity. It’s been said that Beethoven’s 5th Symphony already existed in the universe and that it came through him because he was listening.

So let us work together to empty ourselves of our own impediments so the music of the universe can flow through us as we dance to the divine melody that will lead us to our purpose, so we may manifest what it is that we came here to create. But first…we must learn to listen.

As a flute, I empty myself of judgments, fears, misunderstandings, negativity, and painful childhood memories. In this open space, I listen for the music of the universe and it flows through me as I perform my purpose with effortless virtuosity.

HAFEZ 149

where they occur in smaller concentrations. (Bone marrow provides crucial healing support, as that is where large amounts of growth factors are created that aid in the repair process.) Recent studies have shown that stem cells derived from fat tissue are a much better source for certain kinds of healing, especially for nervous system regeneration1 and differentiating into new cartilage to alleviate joint pain.2 In fact, after stem cell therapy, patients have reported dramatic improvements in pain and tingling from fibromyalgia and neuropathy that had not previously responded to acupuncture or medication. Patients have consistently stated that after stem cell therapy their chronic pain from osteoarthritis and other orthopedic conditions was significantly reduced from levels 8 and 9 to 0 or 1. This dramatic improvement has often led patients to indefinitely postpone knee replacement surgery.3

SAFE & SUPPORTIVE

REGENERATION REVOLUTION The incredible healing power of stem cell therapy There has been much talk over the last five years about stem cell therapy and its great potential for healing, but what exactly are stem cells, and how does the therapy actually work?

Stem cells are produced in several areas of the body and are programmed to accelerate healing by seeking out damaged tissue or dying cells and initiating regeneration. They do this, not by actually repairing the damaged cells, but by becoming healthy versions of them. In the body, every cell has a specific function programmed into it. A skin cell knows exactly how to perform its role in order to keep the body healthy, as does a heart, brain, lung, or liver cell. It’s impossible for a heart cell to become a kidney cell and travel to that area of the body to initiate regeneration there. It must remain a heart cell and perform only the functions that keep the heart healthy.

Stem cells, however, are entirely neutral cells that aren’t yet programmed to function in a specific way. Because of this, they have the unique ability to transform into other types of cells where tissue regeneration is needed in the body. What type of cell they evolve into depends on the environment into which they’re introduced and where the damage is located.

If the body directs stems cells to the bone, they will become bone cells. If they find themselves in the joints surrounded by cartilage, they’ll become new cartilage cells, and so on.

The liver has such powerful regenerative properties because it produces its own stem cells, which can only become new liver cells.

POWERFUL PAIN REDUCTION In the adult body, the largest number of stem cells are found in adipose (fat) tissue. In fact, about 1,500 times more stems cells can be obtained from fat than from bone marrow,

150

Aside from its dramatic results, the next best thing about stem cell therapy is that it’s minimally invasive. Fat cells are harvested from the patient’s body, and after isolating the stems cells from the fat specimen, the stem cells are reintroduced into the body at the area of concern via injection. The whole process only takes 2-3 hours. An alternate treatment includes reintroducing the stem cells into the body via a saline or vitamin IV solution. This method is particularly effective in the case of systemic conditions or diseases of the nervous system such as Parkinson’s disease or multiple sclerosis. The IV reintroduction method also allows the stem cells to travel freely throughout the body, identifying and healing problems that may not be known to the patient.

The regenerative process begins within the first three months after injection and continues for up to one year. After the first four weeks, patients return for a follow-up visit during which they may receive a platelet rich plasma injection. The plasma is harvested from a simple draw of their own blood, and acts as a booster to provide additional growth factors to the area of concern, and provides further support for the ongoing regeneration process.

I invite you to learn more about why this amazing procedure is quickly becoming the alternative treatment for many chronic diseases, as well as the alternative to knee replacements, degenerative disc surgery, spinal fusion, and other operations we once thought were inevitable for such conditions.

For an in-depth consultation regarding how stem cell therapy can support your current health needs, CALL US TODAY

818-452-4483 SOURCES (1) Zhang, Han et al. (2014). Human adipose-derived mesenchymal stem cells: a better cell source for nervous system regeneration. Chinese Medical Journal, 127(2), 329-337.

(2) Brandt, Scott, (December 4, 2015), “Achieving Cartilage Regeneration: Fat-derived stems cells vs. bone marrow”, ThriveMD, https://thrivemdvail. com/achieving-cartilage-regeneration-fat-derived-stem-cells-vs-bonemarrow/.

(3) Buck, Claudia, (November 26, 2016), “Help or Hype?”, The Sacramento Bee, http://www.sacbee.com/news/local/health-and-medicine/ article116841028.html.

Fine Tune Your Mental Focus

HEALING PROZEDGE

We all have busy schedules and often find ourselves pulled in multiple directions with the obligations of work and family. As our attention gets fragmented and stress rises, we lose our edge. We start to forget little details and don’t follow through on certain things, as our overall performance starts to wane under the weight of it all. Slowing down is always the best medicine, but sometimes that’s not an option. For those situations, Be Hive of Healing has developed Prozedge, a proprietary blend of herbs, vitamins and minerals to help you sustain peak performance and maintain your mental edge, while reducing your stress level.

Prozedge contains a synergistic blend of all natural ingredients formulated to provide comprehensive support for the nervous system and cognitive function that includes: DMAE Bitartrate, Rhodiola rosea root extract, Ginkgo biloba leaf extract, eleutherococcus senticosus root extract, passiflora incarnata (Passionflower), Thiamin, Riboflavin, Niacin, Vitamin B6, folate, Vitamin B12 (cyanocobalamin) and Pantothenic Acid (as d calcium pantothenate).

Prozedge is a great choice for keeping yourself at the top of your game if you know you’ve got a hectic schedule coming up, or even as a daily mental primer.

BEHI V EOF LIFE.COM /PROZ EDGE

AWAKENING THE LEADER WITHIN Keynote Speech - LA Fire Department June 2016

DR. SADEGHI ADDRESSES THE LOS ANGELES FIRE DEPARTMENT LEADERSHIP ACADEMY hey say that leaders are born, not made. That may very well be true when it comes to being the president of a nation or a CEO of a worldwide corporation. Perhaps destiny plays a hand in those situations, but that doesn’t mean the rest of us don’t have the capacity to be leaders in some area of our lives.

The truth is, we all possess leadership skills, and when we recognize the ways in which we’re already taking charge in our own lives, we can see that leadership is just another part of our natural self-expression.

Last year I was honored to be chosen as the graduation keynote speaker for the Los Angeles Fire Department Leadership Academy, a widely-respected, 13-week program that draws business leaders from around the United States.

What follows is the address I gave to the graduating class that day. I want to share it with you because cultivating leadership skills can enhance any part of life, especially if you’re working toward a specific goal.

Leadership as Self-Expression There are three phases in which elements and compounds can exist or move from one state to another: solid, liquid and gas. There is, however, a fourth phase of existence which only fire can claim: plasma.

Ladies and gentlemen, gifted leaders and members of the graduating class of the Los Angeles Fire Department Leadership Academy, I would like to share with you my undying respect for fire, and why I owe my life to firefighters. You see, at the age of five, on an ordinary day just like today, I was gifted with an extraordinary experience that brought firefighters to my rescue. The entire left side of my body was covered with a third degree burn that would ultimately leave me recuperating in a hospital burn unit for six months.

I’m here because I know what it’s like to be in the line of fire and experience the full force of it. I know what it’s like to be touched by unforgiving plasma.

152

Even so, it was this horrific experience that would move and inspire me to follow my calling as a physician years later. It was in medical school that I became even more aware of what we all carry in our blood, the colorless plasma.

We all have this fire within us, the fire of creativity and contribution. I chose medicine as a humble way of giving back and being of service, but firefighters do it on the frontline every day. What they do is actually a lot more difficult because it’s about critical mass every single time.

Everything is on the line each time they’re called out to a fire. Their lives hang in the balance with every callout; I’m not going to die if I misdiagnosis a patient, or if I can’t provide treatment as quickly as I’d like. For firefighters, there’s no room for error; it’s black and white. You either get someone out of a burning building, or you don’t.

I’m here out of the respect I have for firefighters, the same firefighters who saved my life as a child. I’m here because we are both motivated by the same thing; we want to be of service to people and leaders in our communities, exercising leadership as part of our natural self-expression. You see, the true color of a real leader is service. When we really think about it, leadership is the only motivating factor for someone to answer the call to become a firefighter.

Ladies and gentlemen, leaders are the first ones to stand up. They’re the people out in front, in the line of fire. It’s perfectly appropriate for the Los Angeles Fire Department to be hosting this intensive leadership academy. I can also see now why Captain Poulson asked me to speak to you, and entrusted me with the privilege of ushering you all into the playground of life, where you will have ample opportunities to be leaders and exercise leadership as part of your natural self-expression.

In a very real way, physicians also have their fingers on the pulse of a fire - the creative, life-giving fire inside all of us. Too much fire or plasma in our blood can create inflammation leading to neurological problems and arthritis, where as too little plasma can contribute to fatigue, atrophy, fibromyalgia, and

THE TRUE COLOR OF A REAL LEADER IS SERVICE.

LOS ANGELES FIRE DEPARTMENT RECRUIT TRAINING ACADEMY

even depression. There is a mirroring in that we all share the desire to work in service to safeguarding our communities as leaders. We all embrace leadership as a natural part of our self-expression. You see, for leaders, in the heart of each crisis lies danger and an opportunity, the awesome opportunity to be of service.

action may result in resistance. Even so, they stand by their word speaking directly without self-censoring. Integrity is more important than validation, which is why they’re not concerned with being liked or with how many friends they have on Facebook.

LEADERS REDEFINE THEIR PROFESSIONS AND TURN THEM INTO CALLINGS.

Ladies and gentlemen, leaders do things differently, which allows them to become a source of hope and inspiration.

Leaders redefine their professions and turn them into callings. Yes, leaders such as our graduating class, follow their intuition instead of what’s expected of them. They go against the grain and take real risks. It’s all part of making a commitment to completing their curriculum - learning to be a leader. In doing so, they do what has never been done before. These leaders not only lead by example, but they speak differently. These leaders are fluent in a conversational domain, a linguistic abstraction that creates! These leaders embody the same spirit, the same passionate fire that has ignited the soul of every leader since the inception of human civilization Yes, these leaders speak differently - they speak leadership - and as trailblazers, they know their vision and independent

These leaders have only one priority, getting things done in a way that will result in the highest good for all concerned. Like cats, these leaders can access a heightened sense of sensory perception, and they listen very closely and generously. They honor commitments and understand by standing under the power of their words; they take full responsibility for everything they say and do. They use the power of their words by speaking their visions into existence. As driven as they are, they aren’t cutthroat, but care about each other and understand that cultivating emotional IQ is a large part of a leader’s success.

These leaders know the power of prizing, appreciating, and acknowledging their team members, families, and even complete strangers. They know that the call of service has no color. They lead effectively while exercising leadership as part of their natural self-expression.

153

TROUBLE ON TAP Understanding and avoiding the dangerous contaminants in tap water

BY DR. HABIB SADEGHI

MILLIONS of people around the world experience difficulty finding safe drinking water every day, so it seems like a luxury that we in the U.S. can simply turn the tap on in our homes, find a drinking fountain in any public park or school, or order a glass in a restaurant, and pure water is right there. Or is it? Our situation calls to mind a line from the classic poem, The Rime of the Ancient Mariner by Samuel Taylor Coleridge: “Water, water, every where, Nor any drop to drink.” It tells the ironic tale of a group of thirsty sailors who are lost at sea and surrounded by not a drop of drinkable water. In many ways, the same could be said about the quality of tap water in the majority of cities and suburbs across the U.S. Water utilities nationwide spend $50 billion each year treating our drinking water and another $207 million protecting water sources from runoff contamination. Yet, when we look into what’s still in the tap water we’re drinking, we find that we’re in the same boat with Coleridge’s sailors, as well as those living in impoverished nations when it comes to having access to truly healthy water. Much of the problem stems from a lack of oversight at the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), and the largely toothless regulation mandate by which they operate.

T O X I C C O C K TA I L

After analyzing 20 million tap water quality tests over the course of five years, the Environmental Working Group (EWG) found 316 contaminants - of which more than 200 were unregulated by the EPA - in the water of 45 states. The contaminants included industrial solvents, weed killers, refrigerants, perchlorate (used in rocket fuel), among others. The chemicals come

from a variety of sources such as agriculture, factory discharge, consumer products, urban runoff, and waste water treatment plants.

At the release of the findings, Jane Houlihan, Senior Vice President of Research at EWG, stated, “It’s not uncommon for people to drink tap water laced with 20 or 30 chemical contaminants. This water may be legal, but it raises serious health concerns.”1 Results from a smaller test of 25 municipal water utilities conducted jointly by the EPA and the U.S. Geological Survey (USGS) were just as bad, and included 251 chemicals, bacteria, and viruses. Some of the toxic substances included arsenic, barium and strontium (heavy metals), metolachlor and atrazine (herbicides), isophorone and bromoform (industrial solvents), triclosan (carcinogenic anti-bacterial agent found in dish and hand soaps), plufluorinated compounds, benzotriazole methyl-1H (rust/ corrosion inhibitor), pharmaceuticals and psychiatric drugs like antidepressants and lithium, and caffeine. Some of the contaminants from the study were so exotic that little is known about their impact on human health. Dana Kolpin, a USGS research hydrologist who participated in the study, in her attempt to quell public alarm by stating that levels of these powerful toxins were “generally low,” only managed to raise more concern by then stating, “But there’s still the unknown. Are there long-term consequences to low-level exposure to these chemicals?”2 As it turns out, there are.

Plufluorinated compounds, chemicals used in the manufacturing of non-stick and stain-resistant food packaging, fabrics and cookware, have been linked to testicular and kidney cancer, ulcerative colitis, and thyroid disease. Findings were based on research conducted in Mid-Ohio

Valley communities where the water supply had become contaminated with pluflorinated compounds by the local DuPont plant.3 Even more alarming is the power of the herbicide atrazine to severely and permanently disrupt the endocrine system. Research published by the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences conclusively showed that atrazine laced water, “demasculinizes (chemically castrates) and feminizes” male frogs, completely reversing their sexual development resulting in “reproductively functional females capable of producing viable eggs,” even though genetically the frogs are still male. Researchers also said this feminization of genetic males was “persistent and complete,” and that it was “not a species-specific effect,” but rather one that occurs across vertebrate classes. 4 Of greater concern is the fact that the level of atrazine used in the study was 2.5ppb (parts per billion) less than the EPA limit for drinking water contamination.

CHLORINE CHAOS

Of course, all of this is a glaring indictment that the current water treatment technologies used in virtually every major metropolitan area in the U.S. are largely ineffective at creating truly safe, pure drinking water. It’s widely known that activated carbon filtration, ozone, and UV treatments are the best and safest ways of removing chemicals as well as microbes, but these processes are costly, so the vast majority of municipalities add chlorine, chlorine dioxide, or chloramines (chlorine and ammonia) to their water to kill pathogens. There are several problems with this. Extreme care must be taken because adding too much chlorine will make the water even more toxic than it already is. Because it’s impossible to put

155

Because it’s impossible to put in enough chlorine to kill 100% of the bacteria and viruses, microbe populations are only brought down to “safe” levels with chlorine, meaning every glass of tap water consumed will always contain some level of pathogens.

in enough chlorine to kill 100% of the bacteria and viruses, microbe populations are only brought down to “safe” levels with chlorine, meaning every glass of tap water consumed will always contain some level of pathogens.

The biggest danger with chlorine is that it interacts with other organic and inorganic chemicals already in the water to create new dangerous compounds called disinfection byproducts (DBPs) like trihalomethanes (THMs), which produce large amounts of free radicals that create extensive cell damage. In fact, studies have shown that drinking chlorinated water doubles the chances of bladder5 and rectal cancer.6 When bathing or showering, chlorine is absorbed through the skin and/or inhaled via steam and goes directly into the bloodstream, bypassing organs that would have a chance to detox it. The hotter the water, the more chlorine that will be inhaled or absorbed. Be sure to get a shower filter that removes chlorine for your home. Not only will you be healthier for it, you’ll be amazed at how much softer your skin and hair will be as chlorine has a drying effect.

These requirements can include the determination to stop regulating a certain contaminant, as well.

Because of this, all contaminants not on the EPA regulation list, of which there are hundreds, have no limit in drinking water, and the agency doesn’t even have to monitor them. The guiding principle behind all of this is the SDWA and EPA policy that state in order for a contaminant to be regulated, doing so must, “…provide a meaningful opportunity for health risk reduction.”7 Who gets to decide whether it’s “meaningful” to remove strontium from the public water supply? Perhaps this explains why the majority of the contaminants on the EPA’s list were chosen decades ago, and very few new toxins have been added.

Incredibly, the EWG water analysis report was released in 2009, and the USGS/EPA study results were released in 2013. In the subsequent years and for various reasons, the EPA has failed to act on any of that information, including its own report. In October 2014, the EPA identified strontium for regulation in its Preliminary CCL3 Determination report, but a definitive ruling won’t come on it until the agency releases its fourth and final regulatory determination report expected sometime in 2019 or 2020.

M E D I O C R E M A N D AT E

Perhaps the only thing less effective than modern water treatment technology and protocol is the regulation that governs it. At present, the EPA regulates 87 contaminants in drinking water across six categories: micro-organisms, disinfectants, disinfectant byproducts, organic chemicals, inorganic chemicals, and radionuclides (radioactive particles).

That sounds like a thorough approach until we recall that the EWG water analysis found over 200 elements from those same categories that the EPA does not regulate at all.

The Safe Drinking Water Act (SDWA) of 1996 requires the EPA to evaluate contaminants in tap water. The problem is that the agency is mandated to conduct an analysis every five years, and regardless of how many contaminants are found, they’re only required to make regulatory determinations on five of them. The key word here is determination, not regulatory. Upon reviewing their results, the EPA could determine that a specific chemical or microbe needs no regulation.

So the SDWA doesn’t mandate the EPA to reduce or even remove contaminants from drinking water but to simply make determinations about them.

156

I N C O M P L E T E A N A LY S I S

How do you know if you’re drinking water is safe? The answer is you don’t, because most municipal water really isn’t. Some utilities send water quality reports to customers, but these only provide a partial picture because they don’t account for any contaminants present in the water that aren’t on the EPA’s regulatory list, or the risk their combinations may pose. These reports also only provide information on the average levels of contaminants and not whether any of them spiked during the reporting period. It’s also important to note that at present, the EPA does not regulate pharmaceuticals in drinking water. Traces of painkillers, sex hormones, cardiac medications8 and more, easily find their way into the public system via urination, flushing pills down the toilet, and other means. This mean that millions of people are receiving minute doses of them every day through tap water.

Bottled water would seem to be the answer, but over time, the cost really adds up. Unless the label says spring water, the product is most likely tap water.

Bottled water has fewer regulations than tap water regarding contaminants because tap water is regulated by the EPA, and bottled water is regulated by the FDA as a food product. Because of this distinction, the FDA cannot require certified lab testing of the water or mandate violation reporting. In addition, the FDA does not require bottled water companies to disclose to consumers where the water was sourced, how it was treated, or what contaminants it contains.9

CHEMICAL CONSPIRACY

As bad as the toxins in tap water are, the majority of them end up there through indirect means washing things down the sink, flushing them down the toilet, or industrial runoff finding its way into our lakes, rivers, and streams. Unfortunately, the most dangerous contaminant of all has a direct route into our water supply because it’s put there right at the water treatment facility by the very people who are supposed to be ensuring our drinking water is safe. I’m talking about fluoride.

Since the early 20th century, sodium fluoride, the same kind that’s in toothpaste, has been the active ingredient in pesticides created to kill rats, roaches, and lice. In fact, fluoride is so toxic that if you look on the back of your toothpaste tube, you’ll see that it says it should be kept out of the reach of children under age six, and that if more than the traditional pea-size portion should be swallowed, poison control is to be called immediately.

A few years ago, a spill of hydroflurosilicic acid, the kind of fluoride that’s dumped into municipal water systems, occurred outside of a treatment plant in Rock Island, Illinois. The cleanup required the entire area to be cordoned off and a staff brought in wearing full head-to-toe hazmat gear. Before the crew even arrived, the fluoride had burned through a significant portion of the parking lot concrete.10 Hydroflurosilicic acid is so caustic that before it gets into our water, it can eat through nearly anything including plastic and stainless steel. It’s common for fluoride to corrode the very pipes that it runs through. Even the containers it’s transported in are labeled toxic, so why would such a dangerous chemical be added to our water supply?

The current water treatment technologies used in virtually every major metropolitan area in the U.S. are largely ineffective at creating truly safe, pure drinking water.

There is an exhaustive amount information about the dangers of fluoride and the insidious corruption that caused our water to be poisoned with it. You can find the full story in any number of excellent documentaries online or Christopher Bayson’s book, The Fluoride Deception. In short, fluoride is an industrial waste product derived from the smoke stacks of phosphate/fertilizer manufacturing plants. In the late ‘30s and early ‘40s, people living near these plants became very sick and some died. But because fluoride was a key chemical element in the research and development leading up to creating the atomic bomb, phosphate manufacturers couldn’t risk potentially debilitating class action lawsuits that might have threatened to shut them down.

After a few company-sponsored scientific studies concluded that fluoride was harmless and couldn’t possibly have been responsible for the afflictions

157

and deaths of local residents, congressional and corporate interests conspired to protect the phosphate industry by allowing it to dump its industrial waste not into the environment, which would have meant federal criminal charges and massive fines, but directly into the people by adding it to the nation’s water supply. By doing so, the corporations wouldn’t have to physically handle the toxic chemical or even pay for its disposal. As people got gradually sicker over time, no one would ever think to attribute their health problems to something has simple as their drinking water, and thus the phosphate industry could go on working with the military industrial complex without fear of future litigation.

P O I S O N & P R O PAG A N DA

In its raw form, fluoride contains the heavy metals mercury, arsenic, cadmium, thallium, and lead, among many other dangerous chemicals.

The EPA has listed fluoride as a developmental neurotoxin, and studies show it crosses the placenta. With information like this, how were

millions of people convinced to willingly ingest a neurotoxin?

The government quickly hired Edward Bernays, the nephew of renowned psychiatrist, Sigmund Freud, to convince Americans that fluoride was good for them. Considered the Father of Public Relations, Bernays pioneered the science of crowd psychology and was no stranger to manipulating the public mind, as he’d worked on previous projects with the government before. In 1928, he authored a book titled, Propaganda: the public mind in the making11 that det ailed how to manipulate populations through media and advertising. In it he states, “If we understand the mechanisms and motives of the group mind, is it not possible to control and regiment the masses according to our will without their knowing it?”

Bernays contended that humans could be manipulated through any one of four human behavioral drives (self-preservation, security, aggression and sex) and thus could be brainwashed into doing almost anything like smoking cigarettes, starting a war, electing a politician, or allowing poison to be put in their

No one explained the dangers of fluoride to Americans or even sought their consent before dumping it into the nation’s water systems.

we’re all being medicated against our will each time we take a drink of tap water or consume any food or beverage that contains it.

Bottled water has fewer regulations than tap water regarding contaminants because tap water is regulated by the EPA, and bottled water is regulated by the FDA as a food product. water. Bernays called this process the “engineering of consent.” Thus began the lie that fluoride prevents tooth decay. The first U.S. city to have its water fluoridated was Grand Rapids, Michigan in 1945. The rest, as they say, is history.

M E D I C AT I N G T H E M A S S E S

The bottom line is that fluoride is the only substance added to water that isn’t meant to treat the water itself, but the people drinking it. In that sense, we’re all being medicated against our will each time we take a drink of tap water or consume any food or beverage that contains it. As a physician, I cannot give any supplement, drug or treatment to a patient without first informing them of its benefits and possible side effects, and then gaining their informed consent to do so. No one explained the dangers of fluoride to Americans or even sought their consent before dumping it into the nation’s water systems. What’s worse is that because it’s in the water, it’s impossible to control the dosage, or how much people consume from day to day via drinking fountains, juices, sodas, soups, canned foods, and even medications. Many prescription drugs, especially anti-depressants like Prozac, contain fluoride.

Fluoride has an affinity for calcium and thus buries

I N C L U D E S S O U R C E S F R O M N E X T PAG E

(1) Luntz, Taryn, (December 14, 2009), U.S. Drinking Water Highly Contaminated, Scientific American, http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/tapdrinking-water-contaminants-pollutants/.

(2) Bienkowski, Brian, (December 5, 2013), Unregulated Contaminants Common in Drinking Water, Environmental Health News, http://www. environmentalhealthnews.org/ehs/news/2013/ unregulated-water-contaminants.

(3) Barry, V, et al, Perfluorooctanoic Acid (PFOA) Exposures and Incident Cancers Among Adults Living Near a Chemical Plant, Environmental Health Perspectives, (2013), 121(11), 1313-1318. http://ehp. niehs.nih.gov/1306615/, all studies: http://www. c8sciencepanel.org/publications.html.

(4) Hayes, Tyrone et al. (2010). Atrazine induces complete feminization and chemical castration in male African clawed frogs (xenopus laevis). Proceedings of the National Academy of Science, 107(10), 4612-4617.

(5) Cantor, K, et al, Drinking water source and chlorination byproducts. I. Risk of bladder cancer, Epidemiology, (1998), 9(1), 21-28.

(6) Hildesheim, M, et al, Drinking water source and chlorination byproducts. II. Risk of colon and rectal cancers, Epidemiology, (1998), 9(1), 29-35.

itself in the bones, teeth, cartilage and ligaments. The body accumulates fluoride, and overtime, it makes the bones very brittle and prone to breakage while contributing heavily to joint disorders and arthritis. One of the first signs that a child has consumed high levels of fluoride is a condition called dental fluorosis. This condition results in opaque white, gray or brown spots, and/or streaking on the teeth, which degrades their integrity and increases decay.

Proponents like to try and confuse people by claiming that fluoride is a naturally occurring element within the earth, and therefore harmless to humans, but this is also a lie. Calcium fluoride occurs in the earth and sometimes in natural waters. This fluoride is far less of a risk because it’s already bound to calcium, keeping it from latching onto yours, and it’s highly insoluble. Fluorosalicic acid, sodium fluorosilicate, and sodium fluoride, the three kinds of fluoride used in tap water, oral products and medications, occur nowhere in nature and are extremely toxic to the body. Any attempt to compare them with calcium fluoride in even the remotest sense is a willful act of deception.

humans, Associated Press, (2008), http://hosted. ap.org/specials/interactives/pharmawater_site/ day1_01.html.

(9) Goodman, Sara, (July 9, 2009), Fewer Regulations for Bottled Water Than Tap, GAO Says, The New York Times, http://www.nytimes.com/ gwire/2009/07/09/09greenwire-fewer-regulationsfor-bottled-water-than-tap-g-33331.html.

(10) Huff, Ethan, (March 30, 2011), Natural News, Fluoride spill at water facility literally burns holes in parking lot cement, http://www.naturalnews. com/031892_fluoride_corrosive.html.

(11) Bernays, Edward L., Propaganda: the public mind in the making, (1928), Ig Publishing, New York.

(12) Luke, Jennifer A, The Effect of Fluoride on the Physiology of the Pineal Gland, A dissertation submitted to the School of Biological Sciences, University of Surrey, (1997), http://fluoridealert.org/ studies/luke-1997/.

(13) Ekstrand J, Ziegler EE, Nelson SE, Fomon SJ. Absorption and retention of dietary and supplemental fluoride by infants. Advanced Dentistry Research 1994; 8 :175-80.

(14) Marshall TA, et al. (2004). Associations between Intakes of Fluoride from Beverages during Infancy and Dental Fluorosis of Primary Teeth. Journal of the American College of Nutrition 23:108-16.

(7) EPA Contaminant Candidate List, Regulatory determination 3, https://www.epa.gov/ccl/regulatorydetermination-3.

(15) Environmental Working Group, American Dental Association concedes: Excessive fluoride a risk to children, November, 15, 2006, http://www.ewg.org/ enviroblog/2006/11/american-dental-associationconcedes-excessive-fluoride-risk-children.

(8) Donn, Jeff, Pharmawater I, Pharmaceuticals found in drinking water, affecting wildlife and maybe

(16) Bennett, Susanne, The Hidden Dangers of Drinking Water, The Huffington Post, September 18,

2012, http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-susannebennett/drinking-water_b_1680027.html.

(17) Chinoy, N, et al, In Vitro Fluoride Toxicity in Human Spermatozoa, Reproductive Toxicity, (1994), 8(2), 155-159.

(18) Freni, S, Exposure to high fluoride concentrations in drinking water is associated with decreased birth rates, Journal of Toxicology and Environmental Health, (1994), 42(1) 109-121.

(19) Ortiz-Perez, D, et al, Fluoride-induced disruption of reproductive hormones in men, Environmental Research, (2003), 93(1), 20-30.

(20) Fluoride in Drinking Water: a scientific review of the EPA’s standards, The National Research Council of the National Academies, Marc, 22, 2006, http://www. actionpa.org/fluoride/nrc/NRC-2006.pdf.

(21) Mullenix PJ, Denbesten PK, Schunior A, Kernan WJ. 1995. Neurotoxicity of sodium fluoride in rats.

Neurotoxicol Teratol 17:169–177.

(22) Varner JA, Jensen KF, Horvath W, Isaacson RL. 1998. Chronic administration of aluminum-fluoride or sodium-fluoride to rats in drinking water: alterations in neuronal and cerebrovascular integrity. Brain Res 784:284–298.

(23) Ding Y, Gao Y, Sun H, Han H, Wang W, Ji X, et al.

2011. The relationships between low levels of urine fluoride on children’s intelligence, dental fluorosis in endemic fluorosis area in Hulunbuir, Inner Mongolia, China. J Hazard Mater 186:1942–1946.

(24) Fluoride in Drinking Water: a scientific review of the EPA’s standards, The National Research Council of the National Academies, Marc, 22, 2006, http://www. actionpa.org/fluoride/nrc/NRC-2006.pdf.

Fluoride Facts

Here’s a small sample of decades of research on fluoride’s damaging effects:

Fluoride collects in the pineal gland in the brain (the third eye), disrupts sexual development and sleep cycles, and limits our ability to access higher states of consciousness.12 Because of their liquid diet, babies receive the highest doses of fluoride, absorbing up to 80% in their bones13, which greatly increases their risk for dental fluorosis later in life.14 In November 2006, even the American Dental Association had to admit the dangers that existed with regard to infants and fluoride, issuing a statement recommending baby formula be reconstituted with fluoride free water.15 The Journal of the American Dental Association actually admitted in 2001 that ingested fluoride was, “…insufficient to have a measurable effect” on dental cavities.16 Fluoride in high doses given to animals destroys sperm in a number of species17 and increases infertility in human couples living in areas where fluoride concentration in water is 3ppm or higher.18 It also reduces circulating testosterone in men.19

KEEPING IT CLEAN In addition to bone destruction, arthritis and thyroid disease, it’s clear why fluoride has been banned in countries like China and Japan, as well as all of Scandinavia and Europe. Until the U.S. decides to do the same, here are a few tips to avoid fluoride and toxic tap water.

Drink reverse osmosis, deionized, or distilled water, as these are the only methods that will remove fluoride from water. Add a pinch of sea salt to re-mineralize it.

The National Research Council has determined that, “… fluorides have the ability to interfere with the functions of the brain.”20 The EPA lists fluoride as having, “… substantial evidence of developmental neurotoxicity.”

Fluoride accumulates in the brain and alters mental behavior.21 Hundreds of studies confirm the damage done to the brain by fluoride impacts learning. Fluoride consumption of just 1ppm, the average level in drinking water, altered the brains and kidneys of rats and increased their uptake of aluminum in the brain, which is connected to Alzheimer’s disease.22 More than 20 international studies have shown that as fluoride damages the brain, it reduces IQ and can have an effect from as little concentration as 0.3 ppm to 3ppm. For every 1ppm that could be measured in the urine, 0.59 IQ points were lost.23 The National Research Council called the negative impact of fluoride on intelligence “significant” and urged further research. 24

If choosing bottled water, always go for spring water, preferably a European brand. Unless the label says spring water, it’s just purified tap water.

Check out reverse osmosis or deionizing water systems and filters for your whole home. They can be costly but one of the best investments you’ll ever make in your home.

Never use tap water to make baby formula! For a great baby formula recipe, visit the Weston A. Price foundation website and search for baby formula.

Avoid commercial beverages in stores and restaurants, as well as foods packed in water. Buy juices only if the labels states not from concentrate so it’s 100% juice with no water added.

Never get fluoride gel treatments at the dentist. Try to find a holistic dentist that does not use fluoride products.

Drink wine and beer imported from Europe.

Get a fluoride-free toothpaste. Tom’s and Nature’s Gate are good brands. Instead of commercial mouth washes, use food grade hydrogen peroxide at 3%, not the kind from the drug store, as it has toxic chemicals and stabilizers in it.

Stop using non-stick cookware.

Check out your medications for any ingredient that contains the prefix fluo. That’s fluoride. Ask your doctor for an alternative.

Stop eating processed food.

Avoid black and green teas, as they are high in fluoride.

Check out fluoride detoxes online.

AMMUNITION FOR IMMUNITY Preparing for cold and flu season with I’MuNation As we head into cold and flu season, get the best insurance against illness this year by arming yourself with a synergistic combination of the most potent immune enhancing herbs and nutrients available today. I’MuNation capitalizes on the anti-microbial and immune boosting properties of the highest quality medicinal mushrooms, bee products and herbal extracts, reinforced with some of the most potent and bioavailable vitamin C to give you an unbeatable arsenal against any microbe that might try to waft your way.

The power of I’MuNation comes from a proprietary blend of Cordyceps sinensis extract, Ganoderma lucidum (Reishi) extract, Grifola frondosa (Maitake) extract, Bee Propolis extract, Sambucus nigra (Elderberry) extract, Echinacea purpurea Root extract, Origanum vulgare (Oregano) Leaf extract and 50 mg of Malpighia glabra (Acerola) fruit extract, which provides 83% of daily vitamin C. In fact, the vitamin C in Acerola fruit is so pure and concentrated, that it contains eight times more vitamin C than oranges, along with 150 other phytonutrients. Now you won’t have to worry about catching the cold or upper respiratory infection everyone is passing around at the office this year. With I’MuNation, your immune system will be armed for anything.

Make I’MuNation your secret weapon in preparing your immune system for the upcoming cold and flu season.

BEHIVEOFLIFE.COM/IMUNATION

Poetry L O U N G E

SA’ADI

A poem by the 13th century Persian poet Sa’adi whose words grace the entrance to the United Nations as a plea to break down the barriers that separate us from one another.

“Human beings are members of a whole, In creation of one essence and soul.

If one member is afflicted with pain, Other members uneasy will remain.

If you’ve no sympathy for human pain, The name of human you cannot retain!”

162

Why Marriage?

MARI NICHOLS-HAINING

Because to the depths of me, I long to love one person, With all my heart, my soul, my mind, my body...

Because I need a forever friend to trust with the intimacies of me, Who won’t hold them against me, Who loves me when I’m unlikable, Who sees the small child in me, and Who looks for the divine potential of me...

Because I need to cuddle in the warmth of the night With someone who thanks God for me, With someone I feel blessed to hold...

Because marriage means opportunity To grow in love in friendship...

Because marriage is a discipline To be added to a list of achievements...

Because marriages do not fail, people fail When they enter into marriage Expecting another to make them whole...

Because, knowing this, I promise myself to take full responsibility For my spiritual, mental and physical wholeness I create me, I take half of the responsibility for my marriage Together we create our marriage...

Because with this understanding The possibilities are limitless.

Breath KABIR

Are you looking for me? I am in the next seat.

My shoulder is against yours.

You will not find me in stupas, not in Indian shrine rooms, nor in synagogues, nor in cathedrals: not in masses, nor in kirtans, not in legs winding around your own neck, nor in eating nothing but vegetables.

When you really look for me, you will see me instantly— you will find me in the tiniest house of time.

Kabir says: Student, tell me what is God? He is the breath inside the breath. (as translated by Robert Bly)

163

The Mother of all Things L AO TSU

The universe had a beginning Called the Mother of All Things.

Once you have found the Mother You can know her children.

Having known the children, Hold tightly to the Mother.

Your whole life will be preserved from peril.

Open up the openings, Multiply your affairs, Your whole life will become a burden.

Those who see the small are called clear-headed; Those who hold to gentleness are called strong.

Use the light.

Come home to your true nature.

Don’t cause yourself injury: This is known as seizing truth.

This Moment, the New Lover SHANTAM

This moment, the new lover.

This seduction, like no other.

This love affair, with ALL of creation.

This welcoming “YES” to all life’s sensation.

This intoxication is not the drunken kind.

This we are now, unimaginable by the mind.

This sacred union dissolves all longing.

This very moment IS the ultimate belonging.

164

Song of Freedom DIVAN OF HAFIZ - POEM NO. 183

From a book entitled “Wisdom of Madness.”

Direct Translations and Imagery by Freydoon Rassouli.

Last night, midnight became an exalted dawn as they kissed the grief from my mouth and breathed the breath of life between these lips.

In that holy darkness, they let me drink from the Waters of Life.

The light of love poured through me until I fell down drunk, reeling in ecstasy.

This cup has spilled over!

Now the wine of reflection shows only the beloved’s grace.

What a glorious midnight!

What a blessed darkness when, on that Night of Great Reward,

I finally received the deed to the fortune of my soul.

From now on, my face is the mirror which everywhere reflects love’s ultimate beauty.

In the splendor of this place, I saw all the wonders of eternity revealed.

So does it really surprise you that I dance through the streets singing out joy for all those privileged enough to have ears?

For this, I received the alms of my salvation.

Tyranny and grief can never prevail over patience and the steadfast heart.

These, my friend, were the keys to my freedom.

All the sugar pouring from my words is the sweet reward of patience.

For this, they gave me the whole Cane Stalk!

Rejoice! The aspiration of Hafiz and the breath of all believers who rise with the sun and with God have broken the heavy chains of illusion and set me free.

For on that day, the Unseen Messenger brought me this magnificent news:

165

To Him that was Crucified WALT WHITMAN

My spirit to yours dear brother, Do not mind because many sounding your name do not understand you, I do not sound your name, but I understand you, I specify you with joy O my comrade to salute you, and to salute those who are with you, before and since, and those to come also, That we all labor together transmitting the same charge and succession, We few equals indifferent of lands, indifferent of times, We, enclosers of all continents, all castes, allowers of all theologies, Compassionaters, perceivers, rapport of men, We walk silent among disputes and assertions, but reject not the disputers nor any thing that is asserted, We hear bawling and din, we are reach’d at by divisions, jealousies, recriminations on every side, They close peremptorily upon us to surround us, my comrade, Yet we walk unheld, free, the whole earth over, journeying up and down till we make our ineffaceable mark upon time and the diverse eras, Till we saturate time and eras, that the men and women of races, ages to come, may prove brethren and lovers as we are.

I Am DR. HABIB SADEGHI

I am Light-filled and Buoyant upon a River of Grace and Truth. I Know Joy and Magic within the GOoDness and the virtues of others. My world is Abundant in Infinite Possibilities. I celebrate my Weird uniqueness and my Divine Generosity, and my Keen sense of Humor. I am Nourished by Faithful Courage and Unconditional Love. All the power that fills me is based on my Word. My Home is Rich in Family, in Peace, in Abundant, in Freedom, its Heart Open wide, and based in Light of Light. I am Safely Buoyant. Upon these waters, Love is and I AM That!

166

167

Sail Away MARLENE RICH It starts one day as the sun shows it’s light when life seems to be so peaceful and bright That the mind seems to fade and begin to blur.

And dates and names become obscure.

So many people in just one face And then they leave without a trace.

Confusion and doubt hang in the air Like a thick fog, just so unfair.

Starting out in space, what do you see?

What’s in your thoughts? How can this be?

And then you are back in the blink of an eye If you are you then who am I? The past and the future they all collide Memories formed on butterflies ride.

Streams of thought that seem so clear Are filled with ghosts that quickly appear.

As the days fade away one thing is true That love is love and you’ll always be you.

It’s in your eyes, the love that you hold And in my heart, though your thoughts go cold.

So float on your clouds, let your mind sail away I promise to be here, but I wish you could stay.

(I love you daddy. Until next time....- at Sarasota Bayfront.

168

SACRED HISTORY OF YOUR SWEET BE HIVE OF HEALING

Growing an intentional healing community on a tribal sanctuary DR. HABIB SADEGHI & DR. SHERRY SAMI

e want to share with you some interesting facts we recently learned about Be Hive of Healing. As we’ve said in the past, we chose to consolidate our medical and dental practices in 2013, and move the new office out of the frantic energy of Los Angeles to a nature-based setting that was more conducive to healing. For us, that place was Agoura Hills. So far, working among the rolling hills and ranches on the cusp of the Santa Monica Mountains has more than met our highest expectations. The rejuvenating energy we feel here enhances our passion for our work, and resonates in the experiences of our patients.

the part of the Santa Monica Mountains called Mt. Estrella.

Created by Hollywood photographer, Jean de Strelecki, in 1940, the 14ft. sculpture can be seen from Highway 101 as you exit at Chesebro Rd. You’ll have to look for him the next time you come to Be Hive of Healing. We plan to visit him soon via an easement path that cuts through the mountains. Times have certainly changed since White Eagle began his lookout.

Back then, Agoura Road was known as the Ventura Highway, lined only by a post office, small grocery store, and a few other buildings that served all of Agoura Hills’ 200 residents. The Ventura Highway we know today wasn’t constructed until 1967.

Only recently has it come to our attention that the larger surrounding area was once inhabited by a community of Native American people from the Chumash tribe. Not only that, but local historians informed us the portion of the land on which our medical and dental center is located was the tribal birthing sanctuary. Because healing is a form of rebirth, we saw this beautiful synchronicity as yet another confirmation that we’re exactly where we’re supposed to be. Prior to our arrival, we were told the building we now inhabit was once a restaurant, and then a bar with go-go dancers. Since moving into the neighborhood, historians and locals alike have thanked us for bringing sanctity and healing back to the land.

As an intentional healing community, it has always been our goal to investigate and incorporate as many natural healing interventions from as wide a range of sources as possible, and this includes medicinal applications from the Chumash and other tribes. Cultivating and integrating these practices with other approaches helps us provide treatments that resonate deeply with the body’s ancient connection to the earth and its memory of wholeness. Sage happens to factor deeply into tribal medicine and works quite well in several applications with women who are pregnant.

As an intentional healing community, it has always been our goal to investigate and incorporate as many natural healing interventions from as wide a range of sources as possible, and this includes medicinal applications from the Chumash and other tribes.

We were also told that there’s a folk art statue of a Chumash chief, known as White Eagle, positioned on an outcropping in

This recent news makes us even more passionate about building a community that sees healing as a frequent and necessary part of human evolution, and not as something we seek out only when we’re sick. As our way of helping build this kind of community, we’d like to remind you that our Healing ZEN Garden is available for your personal events and group meetings. It has always held a special energy for us, but now that we know the deeper history of this land, it’s clear why that feeling is so tangible during Be Hive of Healing gatherings, or when one of us is meditating alone. Come and experience it for yourself… Let us know when you’d like to reserve the Healing Zen Garden for your next special event.

169

SETTING YOUR SIGHTS ON HEALING

Tending to psycho-spiritual issues in the race to recovery Dr. Habib Sadeghi & Dr. Sherry Sami

Photo by: Charlie Neibergall

avid Brown is a gifted sprinter. He owns world records in the 100 and 200 meters races, and has gold medals from national and international championships to prove he’s one of the best. He’s also blind.

illness. If a doctor and patient are at different places along the healing track, whether that be a difference in philosophy or commitment, healing won’t happen. This has to be a race in which they’re working to cross the finish line together.

David competes in Paralympic track and field events all over While David has found an incredible partner in Jerome, who the world, and regularly amazes the crowds by running so fast is doing all the right things, it’s important to remember that (100m/10.92 seconds) without being able to see the track. regardless of all this invaluable assistance, David still has to Assisting David is his guide, Jerome Avery, a former U.S. track run his own race. Jerome can’t do it for him. Even with the best and field competitor who runs alongside him. The runners are physician providing the most knowledgeable and supportive care, connected to each other by a four-inch nylon cord that loops patients must remember that it’s not really the doctor who does around two fingers. As they fly toward the finish line, Jerome helps the healing. Health arises from within the patient as he or she David maintain his lane while announcing how many meters are increasingly commits to the race toward recovery. left to go. He also tells him when Running your own race requires they’re entering a curve, cresting a lot more than just following the “Even with the best physician it, and coming out of it. The key to directions on a prescription. It providing the most knowledgeable, pulling all this off, while running means tending to all the psychosupportive and intimate care, at about 23 miles per hour, is spiritual issues that may be patients must remember that it’s synchronization. contributing to your dis-ease. You

not really the doctor who does the The relationship between Jerome must commit to exploring past healing.

Health arises from within the and David is very similar to the traumas and unresolved hurts that patient as they increasingly commit to relationship between physician may have contributed to creating and patient. For David, it’s crucial chronic illness in your body. You the race toward recovery.” that he has a partner who can must do the necessary work to set the pace. Likewise, it’s very heal those wounds, move into important for patients to find a physician who sets his sights forgiveness, and mend broken relationships. You will have to on healing (not symptom management), and knows how to get access the courage to do what it takes to create a joyful life. there. As David runs his race, his guide needs to be able to keep Hate your job? That’s not helping you heal. Start looking for him on track while providing instructions and encouragement one you love. Is your intimate relationship loveless or a source along the way. In a similar fashion, the right physician will keep of constant stress? Do what you can to repair it or find another his patients on track toward their healing while offering insight, that’s fulfilling. Do everything you can each day to incorporate inspiration, and support. more love, laughter, and joy in your life. If you do, your body will It’s essential that David’s partner be able to provide all this while running side-by-side with him at the same speed. Patients also need physicians who they feel are by their side during their

170

respond to this profound energetic shift by healing itself. Healing does not happen by medicine alone. It takes a great guide and a patient who’s willing to go the distance.

ARREST ALLERGY ATTACKS

It’s hard to enjoy life if you’re looking at it through itchy, watery eyes and sneezing your way through the day.

Healing Aler-G is a potent anti-inflammatory supplement that contains quercetin power.

As a naturally occurring bioflavonoid, quercetin is what gives fruits, vegetables and flowers their color. Acting as a natural antihistamine, this organic powerhouse also possesses anti-cancer and antioxidant properties. It even enhances the performance of vitamin C in protecting the body’s cells from free radical damage. Quercetin is naturally found in foods such as apples, cherries, red wine, dark berries and olive oil.

BEHIVEOFLIFE.COM/ALER-G

The Association of Humor and Health

Exploring the four temperaments and our wellbeing veryone has heard that laughter is the best medicine. While there is some evidence to support the healing effects of laughter, it’s interesting to note that from the time of the ancient Greeks through the Middle Ages, the word humor was not associated with comedy, but health.

Ancient Greek medicine was based on a philosophy known as constitutional medicine. It was believed that humans were divided into four basic temperaments which determined how the body and mind worked together. Each temperament was governed by one of the four basic fluids or humors of the body that were essential for life and good health: blood, yellow bile, black bile, and phlegm.

A person’s temperament could be identified by a detailed list of characteristics including face shape, hair, skin, physique, appetite, mindset, personality, and dreams, as well as bodily excretions and functions such as urine, stool, sweat, digestion, and metabolism.

The key to good health lay in understanding your constitutional temperament or type. Once that was discovered, it was clear how a person should eat, live, and support themselves for a healthy life.

The Sanguine Temperament is governed by the blood humor and is the most desirable type because blood is the very essence of vitality and life. These people have a balanced weight with moderate frame and physique, thick hair, rosy complexion, good digestion and metabolism, with some tendency for a slow bowel. Predispositions include gout, diabetes, sluggish liver and pancreas, and blood disorders. They are poised, outgoing, and lovers of beauty in all things, which can lead to overindulgence.

The Choleric Temperament is governed by the yellow bile humor. Some characteristics include reddish face, broad jaw, penetrating eyes, compact physique with good muscle tone, broad chest, prominent veins, curly, thin, or balding hair, love of meat and spicy foods, cast iron digestion, and fitful sleep. Predispositions include infections, inflammation, fatty liver, and cardiovascular disorders. These people are bold and courageous, but also prone to anger and impatience. With regard to Chinese medicine or Ayurveda, this is the “hottest” temperament and the most catabolic in nature, our modern “Type A” personality.

By Dr. Habib Sadeghi & Dr. Sherry Sami

The Melancholic Temperament is governed by the black bile humor and can be the most problematic. A squarish head and face with prominent cheekbones, dark straight hair, swarthy complexion, and beady eyes, along with a weak appetite, gas, bloating and insomnia signifies this type. Predispositions include anorexia, constipation, arthritis, blood sugar problems, and spleen disorders. These people tend to be practical, very efficient, reliable, and philosophical, but with leanings toward being high strung, frugal, stoic, and overly attached to material possessions.

The Phlegmatic Temperament is, of course, governed by the phlegm humor. Some traits include a full, round face with big cheeks, soft features and large eyes with thick lashes. Sometimes a double chin is present. The body is solid, heavy, or even overweight, with lax muscle tone, pale skin, slow metabolism, and a tendency toward deep sleep. Predispositions include poor circulation, thyroid and adrenal problems, lymphatic congestion, gastric complications, and respiratory problems.

With a kind, nurturing, and compassionate personality, they can also be passive, unmotivated, and hypersensitive.

When a person’s life choices were not supporting their particular temperament or constitution, they were thought of as being out of temper (Latin, temperare or mix), and would display the obvious negative physical and personality traits that went along with their temperament. It is thought that this is why the word humor came to be associated with people acting in strange ways.

Often times, characters behaving in these imbalanced or eccentric ways are the ones that make us laugh. This is why 17th-century playwright, Ben Jonson, was famous for his popular plays, Every

Man in His Humor and its sequel, Every Man out of His Humor.

The prologue of the latter states, “Some one peculiar quality / Doth so possess a man that it doth draw all his affects, his spirits and his powers, / In their confluctions to all run one way.”

It has been shown that watching funny or “humorous” characters can help us stay healthy. A study performed at the University of Maryland Medical Center showed that participants experienced a 22% increase in blood vessel expansion and blood flow after laughing through a 15-minute film clip of a variety of modern comedies. The cardiovascular changes lasted for 30-45 minutes after the experiment, and were comparable to the same benefits one might achieve from aerobic exercise. Because laughter releases high levels of endorphins, it has also been proven to reduce pain and boost immunity, as well as DHA and serotonin levels.

With this in mind, it would be very wise to make humor a significant part of your health maintenance or healing program.

As part of your prescription, we’d like to offer this:

A couple had been married for 25 years and was celebrating the husband’s 60th birthday. During the party a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for so many years, she would give them each one wish.

The wife said, “We’ve been so poor all these years and have never been able to take a real vacation. I wish we could travel all over the world.”

The fairy waved her wand and POOF!—the wife had the tickets in her hand.

Next, it was the husband’s turn. He paused for a moment and then said, “Well, I’d like to be married to a woman 30 years younger than me.”

The fairy waved her wand and POOF!—he was 90!

173

How the human need to bond is integral to addiction.

COMPULSIVE CONNECTION

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

or decades, science has been studying addiction searching for the central element that causes a person to become wholly dependent on drugs, alcohol, or certain kinds of behavior for their sense of wellbeing. In the case of drugs, it’s a commonly held truth that chemical compounds in narcotics are directly responsible for the uncontrollable cravings and debilitating habits they produce. Just a few hits and you’re hooked, but is that really true? Research is revealing that most of what we thought we knew about addiction is wrong. We’ll take a look at heroin, one of the most commonly used drugs, to shed new light on the deeper causes of dependency and how that knowledge can lead to healing and freedom.

ADDICTION ANOMALY The harrowing stories of people who’ve experienced heroin addiction are unfortunately all too common. Many Americans have struggled with addiction in their own families, and the media is never short on stories about the latest celebrity battling the drug. Because of the tragic details that usually go along with these reports, it’s often assumed that heroin by itself is highly addictive. In light of this assumption, it’s interesting to note that hundreds of thousands of people take heroin legally every year in the U.S. and never become addicted.

According to the American Association of Orthopedic Surgeons (AAOS), more than 300,000 total hip replacements are performed in the U.S. each year.1 Patients who break a hip, have a hip replacement, or hip surgery of any kind, often experience a very high degree of pain. As a result, they’re usually administered diamorphine (heroin) for weeks or months at a time. In fact, the heroin that hip surgery patients receive is more pure than the heroin that

can be obtained on the street because it doesn’t contain any of the additives drug dealers use to dilute illegal heroin. With this in mind, logic would conclude that at least some of these patients would end up addicted to heroin after their recovery, but research and regular patient follow-up shows that this just doesn’t happen.

ENVIRONMENT ESSENTIALS The current theory of addiction comes from research performed with rats in the early part of the 20th century. Those studies involved placing a single rat in a cage with two water bottles. One had pure water, while the other was laced with either heroin or cocaine. Over time, the rat would eventually choose to drink exclusively from the drugged water bottle. It would drink with increasing frequency until it finally overdosed and died. This same outcome happened over and over again, leading researchers to believe that it was the chemical compounds in the drug that got the rat hooked and kept it compulsively coming back for more until it killed itself.

By the early 1970s, Dr. Bruce K. Alexander, professor emeritus in the Department of Psychology at Simon Fraser University in Burnaby, British Columbia, thought there was something odd about those experiments. In every case, the rat was placed in the cage alone with nothing else to do and no other rats to relate to.

Dr. Alexander began to question how the experiment might turn out if the rat was placed in a different kind of environment, but still given the choice between the pure and drugged water. In his experiments, Dr. Alexander created what he described as Rat Park, a sensory rich environment filled with colored balls, running wheels, climbing towers, tubes to run through, and other rats to play and have sex with.

Incredibly, the rats living in Rat Park rarely chose the heroin-laced water, drinking less

than 25% of the amount the isolated rats did. They also never used the drugged water compulsively, and none overdosed.2 Around the same time Dr. Alexander was conducting his experiments, TIME magazine published an article stating that 40% of the soldiers fighting in Vietnam had tried heroin, and 20% were addicted to the drug. Naturally, it was assumed that there would be a lot of addicted servicemen coming home who would face all the usual social problems that go along with drug dependence. Amazingly, studies showed that after the war, 95% of these men didn’t need drug rehabilitation or even experienced any withdraw symptoms. They simply quite using the drug.3 For Dr. Alexander, this was clear proof that the deeper causes of addiction were the same in his rats as they were in humans.

While at war, the soldiers experienced their situation and environment as stressful, isolating, and disconnected. After returning home, their environment changed dramatically, and because they could enjoy love, companionship, and family, and had a deeper sense of connection and purpose, they didn’t need the heroin any more. Dr. Alexander deduced that the fundamental key to addiction wasn’t the chemical compounds in drugs that were believed to get people “hooked,” but the quality of their environment that drove them to the drugs. Their dependency was based on what they were lacking, or perceived they were lacking in their lives.

Observing the behavior of servicemen upon their return from Vietnam, Dr. Alexander decided that he wanted to find out if he would get the same results from rats that were addicted to heroin by putting them in Rat Park. As one might expect, the results were fascinating. After a few withdrawal twitches, rats that had been on heroin for nearly sixty consecutive days eventually shunned the drug in the social, stimulating world of Rat Park and went back to having a normal life, proving once again that the drug’s physical power to hijack the brain or take over one’s life wasn’t as all-powerful as we’d previously thought.

“Dr. Alexander deduced that the fundamental key to addiction wasn’t the chemical compounds in drugs that were believed to get people ‘hooked,’ but the quality of their environment that drove them to the drugs.”

175

PRIMAL BONDS The power of external stimuli in our environment to drive our behavior is very real, and has been understood for quite some time. Our environment comprises everything and everyone outside ourselves, including our intimate, family, and social relationships. Researchers who followed more than 12,000 people for 32 years documented that people with a friend who became obese were 57% more likely to be obese themselves.4 Taking this into consideration, it’s easy to understand how so many soldiers in Vietnam used heroin in the company of other soldiers who were using as a way to cope with the stress of war, as well as with the lack of emotional and creative stimulation. Back home, out of the negative environment that triggered their addiction, it was easier for soldiers to quit using heroin. Hip surgery patients don’t get addicted while recovering in the hospital, because they know they’re going home to an environment that’s stimulating, peaceful, and full of love and support.

On the other hand, it’s common for people who can afford to go for weeks or months to luxurious rehab retreats, that offer stimulating environments and opportunities for emotional release and social interaction to do extremely well, only to relapse shortly after they return home to the environment that triggered their addiction. Back “home,” these people often experience a feeling of isolation, lack of purpose and/or emotional and creative stimulation, as well as negative or unsupportive relationships. That’s why 90% of all heroin addicts relapse once they get home, because nothing in their environment has changed.

SOURCES

For most, addiction doesn’t lie in a chemical hook that creates a craving, but in the emotional void they experience in their environment. This is why a person can be tragically addicted to gambling, video games, pornography, shopping, and so on, activities that have no so-called chemical hooks. As humans, we have an innate need to bond and connect with people we love, and engage in activities that have meaning for us. If we’re happy and healthy,

176

this bonding happens naturally, and our spirits are filled up. If, however, we are traumatized, isolated, or feel disconnected from life and others in some way, we will bond with something else that helps us alleviate that gnawing sense of lack or loss. We must, because bonding is in our nature. The way to break unhealthy bonds, or addictions, is to create new bonds with people we love and new interests in activities that have meaning for us.

This isn’t to suggest that changing one’s environment and relationships is a panacea for all addictions in every person. People are different and sometimes chemicals do play a role in addiction, but in a much smaller percentage of people than we’d ever imagined before. In his book, The Cult of Pharmacology, Richard DeGrandpre discusses how the advent of the nicotine patch in the 1990s was hailed as the silver bullet that would free all smokers from cigarettes. After many years, the Office of the Surgeon General found that only 17.7% of smokers were able to wean themselves off the patch, revealing that for a small percentage, their addiction was chemicallybased, while it more than likely wasn’t for 82%, rendering the patches largely useless.

So, while changing the environment shouldn’t be viewed as a cure-all for addiction, science is discovering that a negative environment is one of the primary causes of addiction. Because of this revelation, positive environmental changes should be instituted immediately and dramatically in any rehabilitation program for maximum benefit, especially since chemical “hooks” affect a far smaller percentage of the addicted population than was previously thought.

CHOOSING CONNECTION Of course, this discovery has enormous implications for the multi-billion dollar, socalled war on drugs we’ve been waging in the U.S. for nearly 50 years. This “war” is based on the claim that we have to eradicate drugs from society because they contain chemicals that will take over our brains and result in addiction.

If environmental factors play a primary role in addiction, and chemical hooks are

only a factor for a small percentage of the population, then perhaps the war on drugs is doing more to perpetuate drug use than to eliminate it.

The war on drugs has been an utter disaster. It has caused soaring incarceration rates, political corruption, geopolitical destabilization in places like Latin America, Asia, and Africa, as well as skyrocketing violence around the world, especially in the inner cities of the U.S. How much sense does it make to take a person suffering from drug addiction out of society and throw him in jail, only compounding his sense of disconnection from the world? On top of that, we take his job away along with anything else that gave his life meaning while he’s locked away, and then blame him for not recovering.

Because we are all connected at the level of spirit, it isn’t enough to limit ourselves to talking about individual recovery if we want to solve the drug problem; it’s time to talk about social recovery. This means changing our environment as a whole, and changing how we interact with each other. In today’s America, there is a crisis of disconnection or de-bonding going on.

The more technologically advanced we seem to get, the more distant we become from each other. We’ve fallen into the habit of constantly emailing and texting each other instead of picking up the phone or meeting in person, which would allow us to experience the immediate warmth of closeness and connection.

Technology increases communication, but not connection. It transfers information, but not emotion, and that’s what our hearts respond to, and what endears us to one another. How many children spend hours each day playing video games instead of interacting with their families? How many families actually have dinner together anymore? How many neighbors on your street can you name and claim that you know on a personal basis? It’s time to make it a priority to create a more engaged, social, supportive, and creative society just like Dr. Alexander’s Rat Park. We need a society that’s less divided by electronic filters and fear-based isolation, because the opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety, it’s connection.

1) American Association of Orthopedic Surgeons, OrthoInfo, (August 2015), http://orthoinfo.aaos.org/topic.cfm?topic=A00377, Hari, Johann, (January 25, 2016), The Huffington Post, “The Likely Cause of Addiction Has Been Discovered, and It Is Not What You Think”, http:// www.huffingtonpost.com/johann-hari/the-real-cause-of-addicti_b_6506936.html.

(2) Robins, Lee et al. (2010). Vietnam veterans three years after Vietnam: how our study changed our view of heroin. American Journal on Addictions. 19(3), 203-211.

(3) Christakis, Nicholas et al. (2007). The spread of obesity in a large social network over 32 years. The New England Journal of Medicine. 357(4), 370-379.

(4) DeGrandpre, Richard, The Cult of Pharmacology: How America Became the World’s Most Troubled Drug Culture, (2006), Duke University Press.

A Premier Executive Wellness Program

TRANSFORMATIONAL INTENSIVE (T!) Imagine how natural healing could be in an environment that’s dedicated to your wellbeing 24/7. Think about the peace of mind you could have if you absolutely knew, not just felt, that you were in perfect health and had the tools to maintain it regardless of your age.

Transformational Intensive (T!) is a premier executive wellness program that provides the most comprehensive medical prevention and diagnostic services available.

Participants receive a full-scale health evaluation that includes a comprehensive physical exam, dental evaluation, blood, urine and stool panels, CAT scan, MRI, EKG, EEG, body composition analysis, allergy and food sensitivity testing, as well as extended consultations with both Dr. Sadeghi and Dr. Gross.

Each participant receives a fully-detailed report on every facet of their current state of health with a personalized plan of care to restore and/or maintain health and provide maximum protection against the diseases of aging.

YOUR HEALING TRANSFORMATION STARTS HERE L E A R N

M O R E

B E H I V E O F H E A L I N G .C O M / T I

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

Antibiotic Remedies from the

10 CENTURY Learning from the past in the fight against antibiotic-resistant “superbugs” DR. HABIB SADEGHI & DR. SHERRY SAMI

t’s common knowledge that decades of unnecessary prescriptions for antibiotics have led to the development of antibiotic-resistant microbes, or “superbugs,” as the mass media calls them. The mutation of these pathogens has evolved so far that some of them now only respond to one known antibiotic. Recently, in China, scientists were said to have found the first strain of bacteria that is capable of resisting every antibiotic on the market.

Scholars from the British Library are working with scientists at the University of Nottingham to recreate an ancient recipe for eye salve to study its potential antibiotic properties.1 This “eyesalve,” as it’s specifically named, comes from Bald’s Leechbook, one of the oldest known medical textbooks, dating from the 10th century.

The eye salve recipe was chosen for study because it contains ingredients that are known to have anti-microbial properties. It also caught the interest of researchers because it was singled out by the authors of the ancient text as being one of “the best” antidotes in the volume.

Luckily for the British Library, the University of Nottingham is renowned for two study disciplines, molecular microbiology and early medieval history, specifically Anglo-Saxon and Viking history. You couldn’t find a more qualified institution for translating, recreating, and studying a 1,000-year-old remedy for infections. The research team paid special attention to recreating the recipe with ingredients as close to what might have been available in the 10th century as possible. A few of the required elements included two species of Allium (garlic and onion or leek), oxgall (bile from a cow’s stomach), and wine, which researchers sourced from a vineyard that had been in operation since the 9th century. Specific instructions were given as to how the ingredients were to be prepared, combined, and processed, which included brewing in a brass vessel. After being left to stand for nine days, the potion was to be strained through a cloth.

When the salve was ready, it was applied directly to a culture of several billion bacteria clumped together and protected by a thick layer of biofilm. It’s this dense gelatinous cocoon of biofilm that makes many of these

178

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

“Just because science moves forward doesn’t mean that everything that came before has nothing left to say or contribute to health and healing.”

aggressive pathogens untouchable by antibiotics or even the immune system. After just 24 hours, researchers were stunned. The protective biofilm had completely dissolved, and only a small amount of actively dying bacteria were left. What’s even more astonishing is the fact that the bacteria to which the ancient eye salve was applied was methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus (MRSA), the deadly superbug so many patients catch while in the hospital.

Dr. Freya Harrison, researcher with the School of Life Sciences at the University of Nottingham had this to say about the dramatic results: “What we found was very interesting. We found that Bald’s eyesalve is incredibly potent as an antiStaphylococcal antibiotic in this context. We were going from a mature, established population of a few billion cells, all stuck together in this highly protected biofilm coat, to really just a few thousand cells left alive. This is a massive, massive killing ability.”

Even more exciting is the fact that Bald’s eyesalve has since performed just as powerfully in a U.S. study where it was applied to a real wound. It has been described as “more effective than conventional antibiotic treatment,” and has performed consistently from batch to batch.

It seems to hold its potency, even when stored in the refrigerator.

This should be yet another lesson to us that sometimes the old ways, or in this case, the very old ways, are the best. Just because science moves forward doesn’t mean that everything that came before has nothing left to say or contribute to health and healing. In fact, science has a terrible habit of over-complicating things, getting in its own way and becoming its biggest obstacle. Not only does Bald’s eyesalve hold significant promise for protection against pathogens of the future, but it reminds us of the timeless and profound value of healing interventions based in natural elements such as Anthroposophical medicine, homeopathy, apitherapy, and so many others offered at Be Hive of Healing.

179

dR. hABIB sADEGHI

Creating a Proper Holding Space

For Healing

s part of my lifelong dedication to anthroposophical medicine, I’m always investigating unique healing herbs and homeopathic substances from all over the world. Because of this, it’s been on my bucket list for years to visit the Mariage Frères tea room in Paris, France. Founded by brothers Henri and Edouard in 1854, the company offers a very large selection of the most exotic gourmet teas in the world. Fortunately, some of their products are available online and in other locations. The last time I had the pleasure of enjoying one of their custom blends, it got me thinking about the most important part of making a great cup of tea. Was it the perfect blend of ingredients, or the special way they were harvested? Perhaps it was the quality of the water, or how it was brewed. Then I realized that no matter how fancy the ingredients might be, or how elaborate the preparations, the tea won’t do you much good unless you have a cup or container in which to hold it.

In much the same way, this can be said about the healing process. We all want to be well and experience the richness of a healthy life, but in order to create that, we must first learn to become a “container.” We must be able to bring forward and hold the unresolved emotional issues that have been brewing just beneath our consciousness and triggering our physical illnesses. Of course, working through long suppressed psycho-spiritual pain can quickly bring our emotions to a boil.

The process isn’t comfortable or easy, but when we can hold the experience and bear the heat of it, something amazing happens. As the process brings up all the realizations and lessons from our painful experiences (our spiritual nutrition), the misunderstandings, misperceptions, and misidentifications we have about ourselves fall, like the sediment from the tea leaves, to the bottom of our cup, where they are ultimately washed away.

Holding the emotional aspects of our physical illnesses in our consciousness so that we can work through them without judgments, distills our spirit down to its true essence and we discover who we really are free from denial, blame, resentment, guilt, hatred, and so on. When we discover the unconscious connection between our emotional pain and our physical pain, we give meaning to our suffering and hold the experience in a lighter way. No longer is disease merely an experience we must get rid of, but one which we must learn from. When the emotional healing begins to unfold, the body reacts in kind because we understand that our pain has a deeper purpose.

Psychotherapist, Wilfred Bion, developed the container/ contained theory. He said that in order for us to process our emotions properly, we must be able to contain them. That

180

doesn’t mean suppressing them. It means holding or being present with our feelings in a conscious way that allows us the dignity of our own emotional process while we experience it in a non-judgmental and empathic way. This is one of the greatest acts of self-love. Only when we empty ourselves completely of unresolved emotion can we create a holding space where healing can take place.

This month we celebrate mothers, the experts at teaching us the art of emotional containment. If a baby mistakenly walks into a glass door, he may bump his head or even fall over. He becomes upset because he doesn’t know how to contextualize his experience and bursts into tears, giving himself over to uncontained emotion. Immediately, the mother comforts the baby, modeling for him how he is to be comforting and compassionate with himself while openly expressing his emotions. She may even show or explain to him how to walk around the glass panel instead of trying to go through it. In this way, she contextualizes his experience and provides a reason for his suffering. In the end, his painful experience is given meaning and makes sense to him, supporting his return to emotional equilibrium. This is how we are supposed to have learned to contain or process our emotions as adults, but if our parents were not contained themselves, they couldn’t give us what they didn’t have. However, it’s never too late to learn!

When our emotion is uncontained, it flies all over the place, usually outward at other people as projections and blame before it turns inward as criticism, guilt, shame, or resentment. In the end, this drama of negative emotions plays out in the theater of the physical body, rather than in our conscious awareness and heart. The result of this is always dysregulation and often,

dis-ease. When we become ill, we immediately want to know all the facts about why the disease occurred, what we can do about it, and how our story will end. In other words, we want to get to the final scene where all the unexplained pieces of the plot come together and everything finally makes sense, before we have experienced the drama.

A sculptor creates a beautiful bowl from a block of stone by knowing which parts to keep and which to throw away. In the same way, by making ourselves vessels where the alchemy of healing can begin through emotional containment, we discover what to keep and what to discard from our emotional experiences.

and bad emotional habits to the next generations. In fact, you might say our own emotional healing is what spiritually inoculates our children from inheriting our emotional residue, as well as the emotional residue of their ancestors.

Spiritual philosophy tells us that in order to manifest anything, we must be something and do something before we can have the something we want. In our case, the tea cup is the stateof-being known as emotional containment. The water is the state-of-doing. By moving through the dynamic flow of life events without resistance, we receive the guidance our containment provides us.

This allows us to continue to take the best possible actions.

Right thinking followed by right choices naturally leads to manifesting what we desire.

“A sculptor creates a beautiful bowl from a block of stone by knowing which parts to keep and which to throw away. In the same way, by making ourselves vessels where the alchemy of healing can begin through emotional containment, we discover what to keep and what to discard from our emotional experiences.”

Milda Morse wrote a beautiful poem called “Tear Catcher” about a small glass vial that women once used to catch and contain their tears while their husbands were off at war. When we honor the pain of our past by containing the full force of our emotions, our tears become a prism through which we are able to see our experiences differently. In this way, our story begins to reveal its secrets to us at last. This epiphany, which reveals why life is the way it is for us, allows us to break the cycle of unconscious behavior and prevents us from passing down our un-containment

One of Rumi’s most famous poems is called “Guest House.” In it he teaches us emotional containment by recommending that we welcome each joy and sorrow as it comes to call at our door, for each one has something to teach us. It would benefit us to be good hosts to our emotional guests who usually won’t leave until we’ve fully appreciated the gifts they’ve brought us. In the meantime, you might even offer them a cup of tea during their stay.

181

182

183

184

185

186

ARTWORK © GAVIN AUNG THAN 2016 TRANSLATION TO ENGLISH BY COLEMAN BARKS THE ESSENTIAL RUMI, HARPERCOLLINS, 1195, 2004, © COLEMAN BARKS

ZENPENCILS.COM

HUMAN “BREEDS”

BY GARY DAVID

SIMULTANEOUS TIMES

Whenever we look at the night sky, we are looking at the past. The light from one star may reach our eyes in fifty or sixty years. Another star may appear to lie right beside the first, yet its light may have been traveling thousands of years to reach us. The riot of stars look like they’re all there at once, side by side, constellated in space. But they are not. They are not “simultaneous” in time. Even within a single constellation we are looking at stars which existed in many different epochs of the past.

Like stars in the night sky, the 7.5 billion humans on earth can be seen to live in different times. It’s easy to think that we are one species, that we are all present at once. Genetically, and

188

existentially that may be so, but the worlds in which we live, like the stars, can be thought of as emanating from different times in the evolution of the human thought-sphere. Thought-spheres are meaning-environments, and they can exist in different times; they may as well be different planets in some ways. Each is a different orientation.

ORIENTATIONS

Picture two people walking down a street that appears flat to both of them.

The ‘objective’ conditions of the firstperson perceptions are shared. They see similarly. But let’s say that one of them believes the whole earth is flat, while the other believes in a spherical earth. What makes a difference is the imagined and

narrated order in which each one lives – believing is seeing. For example, the person with a flat-earth viewpoint may have fear triggered by images of falling off the edge, and even go to therapists who will help them allay their fears, but leave the fundamental assumption intact.

Those fundamental assumptions are the infrastructure of what is meaningful to them: their orientation. The “story” rules. Both of these people are genus homo, species Sapiens, but epistemically, they are different “breeds.” They can’t interbreed at fundamental levels. They have very different orientations, which gives them a different sense of epistemic proprioception, i.e. how they feel where they are in symbolic ‘space’ – what’s inside and outside of their world of thought.

The riot of stars look like they’re all there at once, side by side, constellated in space. But they are not. They are not “simultaneous” in time. Even within a single constellation we are looking at stars which existed in many different epochs of the past.

I’m afraid the division of these orientations may be unbridgeable at the level of values. The motivational power of negative affect motivates strong defenses in unquestioned ideologies, sometimes to the death. As Mark Twain said, “It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you; it’s the things you know that just ain’t so.”

THE EPISTEME – THE GENERAL SYSTEM OF KNOWING

As our experiences emerge from the scenes of our lives, what they mean to us appears to be happening now. But what if they weren’t? In some sense, they are. But what if the meaning of what is going on in the present was made at an earlier time in our life? What if the current scene is “scripted” to fit scenes in the past? Then you have the past operating in the present as if it was the present. Much of what we feel in the present are emotions that happened before. David Bohm suggested we call those feelings “felts” – feelings that happened in the past.

The methods of making meaning is not identical to itself under all conditions, at all times in history, in all kinds of cultures, and in all human beings. J. S. Bois wrote, “It is patterned in its very core by the language, the symbol system, and the set of values that one has been conditioned to. To think is to relate oneself, in practice and in theory, to what one perceives as going on within oneself and outside. Depending on the semantic environment that we have internalized, certain thoughts are thought ‘naturally,’ as we say, and some cannot be thought at all.”

THE EPISTEMOLOGICAL PROFILE

Gaston Bachelard, who seemed to be ruthlessly willing to engage in self-inquiry, invented a model whereby he could see where his concepts were in the evolution of scientific thought.

He wrote: “…. we have to remind everyone of the pluralism of philosophic culture. Under these circumstances it would appear that a psychology of the scientific mind should draw up what we shall call the epistemological profile of various conceptualizations.

By a mental profile of this sort one could measure the effective psychological action of the various philosophies in the task of knowing . . . . An epistemological profile bears the marks of the obstacles which a culture has had to surmount. . . . We are therefore going to take the direction of this progress as the axis of our philosophic study and if, on the abscissa of its development, philosophical systems place themselves regularly in an order constant for all notions, an order which moves from animism to surrationalism (via realism, positivism and simple rationalism) we shall be somewhat justified in speaking of a philosophical progress of scientific notions.”

Bois, found much substance in Bachelard’s work, and took his profile and generalized it beyond its use in science. He took the philosophically technical terms like naïve realism and positivism, etc., and gave them names of everyday methods of functioning: Sensing, Classifying, Relating, Self-reflexive awareness and creative imagination, and Participating. Bois wrote, “On page 194 of Science and Sanity, Korzybski distinguishes three periods of human development: the pre-human or primitive period of unrestricted identification, the infantile or Aristotelian period of partial identification, and the adult, non-Aristotelian and ‘scientific’

period based on the complete elimination of identification. From this and from Bachelard’s epistemological profile, which assumes that each individual, in his personal development, recapitulates the cultural history of humankind, I devised a five-step scale of human development, with conceptual revolutions, as seen

by Percy W. Bridgman, highlighted as transitional phases of turbulence and creativity between relatively quiet periods of crawling advance.”

EPISTEMOLOGICAL PROFILING AND EPISTEMIC SCHIZOPHRENIA

To begin to understand all of this, I learned from Bois how to take key notions of importance in my world of experience including the public utterances of others, and to put them on the Epistemological Profile. I did this (and still do) for myself, and taught others to develop the skill. I found it valuable to acquire a sense of relativity in meaning space. You can take terms like ‘self,’ ‘sex,’ ‘love,’ ‘communication,’ ‘healing,’ ‘money,’ and many others, and place them on the Epistemological Profile (EP) to get a sense of where they come from in evolutionary time, how their meanings changed. This evolution of methods-ofevaluation is called the evolution of the episteme (pronounced: epi’sti:mi), or the system of knowing (motivated by affect, and grounded in biology) relevant to a particular time.

For myself, I learned that I was semantically “schizophrenic” in key areas. That means that I was bouncing all over the place in epistemic evolutionary time. One moment I may be thinking-feeling-acting as people did over 2500 years ago, the next moment at the time of the Greek philosophers, 500 BC, or at the time of the Renaissance, or now in the 21st century.

Whenever this temporal schizziness occurred, affectively speaking, it created havoc. The organism lost its coordination in virtual reality, and the images were confusing.

What if you were have a conversation with someone, and as they talked their meanings were coming from different ages?

What if their clothes kept changing as they jumped around in time? One moment you might be facing someone in a loin cloth who is feelingly, and mythologically in a reality of judging the world by how they felt, and what their senses revealed. Then the loin cloth morphs into a person wearing a Greek toga, squeezing all meaning into logical common sense, classifications and unexamined theories. Or, found yourself trying to understand someone wearing a powdered wig from the time of Isaac Newton using numbers and making relationships between things to fathom unseen “laws” that govern life’s movement in a clock-like universe? Then the other person is suddenly wearing readymade clothes of the 21st Century, aware that how he or she is making meaning is contributing to the reality that’s unfolding, now. A person of that episteme is aware that her or his own nervous system, what she cares about, her language structure, and her assumptions are all shaping the experience of what is going on. And that a scene with her presence would not be the same without her.

LIMITS

Each stage of development embodies methods of thinking-

189

feeling-acting. The underlying motivation of the way we fathom the unknown from moment to moment is a function of affect.

Affect motivates and biases cognition so that “pure objectivity” is a myth.

In our childhood, our methods and scripts worked for us in allowing us to adapt, for better or for worse. But later in life the earlier scripts are too limited to deal with the growing complexity of our existence. If the gulf is too big, the system goes into cycles of turmoil. The same with the development of the episteme. The earlier stages emerged as we learned in life as lived at that time. No stage is “wrong”, but becomes inadequate to deal with life at a later stage. If the older methods are not adequate, the “body” of a culture goes into cycles of turmoil.

I see each stage as a “limit.” Bachelard called them obstacles (“An epistemological profile bears the marks of the obstacles which a culture has had to surmount”). A limit is conventionally defined as a point or level beyond which something does not or may not extend or pass. But in mathematics, a limit is defined as “approaching.” A limit is something we approach not accept as an “ending.” We may not be able to work it out directly, but we can see what it might be as we get closer and closer . . . we approach the limit. A limit is felt as a contraction in the body; something that needs attention. Limits can lead to helpless or creative responses.

A creative response leads to learning our way further within our current stage of development; we approach the limits. In so doing, we start to get closer to the next stage of development.

We see with greater clarity what’s involved, and our presence is extended into a new dimension provided we have the resources to deal with “letting go“ and emerging into a new reality. At that point somatic awareness is vital in guiding the learning process.

COMMUNICATION

Can people of different orientations share meanings? Can they communicate? If we can’t share meanings, we can’t hold together. People who can’t imagine together cannot have intimacy in communication. We can communicate at formal levels, and levels of information exchange, but not usually in exchanges of values. We live in different ‘realities’ from our innate resources and their extensions, into our theories and ideologies and doctrines. And the most important circle, the circle of methods – how we make meaning. (See below). We can be seen as “different breeds” who cannot epistemically interbreed. The Epistemological Profile is designed to bring awareness to all of this.

STRUCTURAL, FUNDAMENTAL CHANGE

Bois said, “These systems are the epistemes prevalent in different regions of the planet at different epochs of history.

They are well hidden within the brain cells of people who take the dictates of systems as the laws of human nature. We are just beginning to perceive their elusive presence and to form some idea of their subtle power on human thoughts and values.

There are strong indications that they divide the human race into breeds actually living and operating in worlds of subjective reality more different from one another than we ever suspected.

They account for phenomena that have been classified until now as mysterious, determined by Fate, and totally beyond human control. Once we have developed the proper mental instrumentation to detect these epistemic systems, we see them in action in a variety of events and situations”. (Epistemics, J.S. Bois, p. 153) With this model, we can see ourselves currently going through a semantic (meaning) “revolution” that emerged somewhere between the end of the 19th and beginning of the 20th centuries. We seem to be reaching a peak of intensity.

We can each sense, feel, and experience it at the silent level in our daily lives. Our whole nation is living it along with other nations, each according to its particular context. Epistemics is one way of learning into the process and being able to be self-guiding. It’s a methodology for tracking the motivated movement of meanings from non-verbal to verbal levels in the current epistemic environment.

THE FOURTH STAGE

I am not going to go into the characteristics of each limited stage in the process here. That will take more unfolding than in a short essay. But I do want to say one thing about the fourth stage, the fourth limit. Stage 4 emerged by meeting the limits of stage-3 Humanism. We searched the archives of history for the truth about ourselves. We searched the past to give meaning and continuity to the present. But the task proved to be futile because we can only conjure up images we use to describe ourselves in current spacetime. It’s like looking into a mirror of a mirror – we see ourselves in images of infinite regress. We have bumped into the limits of thought itself. The second half of our seminar will be about the Epistemological Profile, and then into the methods relevant to stage 4 as applied to communication with self-other, developing what is called value-sensing, and finally what somatic self-reflexiveness brings to our worlds of making meaning. In so doing, we will be approaching the fifth stage limit called Participating where the self-as-observer is absorbed into self-participating.

THE EPISTEMOLOGICAL PROFILE (WESTERN CULTURE)

Without a doubt, neither the classical age nor any other culture outside our own has been able to determine the boundaries of a general system of knowledge or to give it a name. But that system has been sufficiently binding to force the visible forms of knowledge to reveal their mutual relationships, as if the methods, the constructs, the types of analysis, the forms of actual experience, the minds of men (and women), and eventually men themselves moved about in conformity with a fundamental network which penetrates their whole person and gives a pattern to the implicit but unavoidable unity of all their knowing. – Michel Foucault Here is a brief survey of the Epistemological Profile (EP) in general. It was first used by Gaston Bachelard to examine his own assumptions and tendencies regarding key concepts of physics. J. Samuel Bois later adapted Bachelard’s formulation into a more general application as a skill that could be used by anyone willing to learn it and make it a part of self-inquiry and

190

self-awareness. The EP is a good example of modern epistemological methods. The original EP implied but did not specifically emphasize the role of affect as motivation in a stage of development (using ‘affect’ as in the Silvan Tomkins sense). I hope to remedy that as we begin to update the formulation.

Historically, there can be seen to be four stages in the Western evolution of cognitive-affective methods of evaluation.

The evolution of these methods has been called by various names: the structured unconscious and the episteme by Bois and Michel Foucault. Its bio-social formation was called the noosphere by Teilhard de Chardin.

STAGE I: SENSING.

Historically, this designates the time previous to the Greek philosophers. At this stage, awareness is primarily related to sensory perception of the outer world, unquestioned emotions and feelings, i.e. the ’nature’ of things is what a person feels they are without questioning the ’objective’ value of the feelings involved.

Ruled by these feelings, we expect people and things to yield to those feelings.

This is living in a universe in which all objects, animals, etc. are characterized as human. Magic and miraculous explanations are used to describe those happenings outside of what is accepted as human experience. These happenings are seen as being ruled by gods.

Stage I is also characterized by automatic projections of one’s own attitudes, purposes, and desires, by which you interpret the behavior of others; and a complete assurance that nothing of importance or of value is happening or has happened outside the world as the individual sees it. This could be seen as immersion in “me” whether the “me” represents an individual, clan, family, nation, etc.

“When this ‘primitive’ condition is dug out of the fossilized layers of the cultural past to serve as a ‘scientific’ model of humans today, the confusion of embryonic life with adulthood is complete, the historical development of humankind is denied, and cultural evolution is a fanciful theory lacking any empirical referent.” (The Art of Awareness.

J.S. Bois)

STAGE II: CLASSIFYING.

Historically initiated in Greece in the

period covering 650 B.C. to 350 B.C. The beginnings of a deductively rationalized relatedness in the western world were systematized i$ the thought and writings of Aristotle.

The ‘nature’ of things is what man says they are; you classify people, things, and actions in a linear, planar fashion according to their “nature;” this “nature” is known through common sense; through logic you come to conclusions about an “objective” world; human nature is an unchanging “substance” regardless of any particular “qualities” a human mind possesses a miniature of the ‘real’ world.

This stage can be seen as a formalization of Stage I even though it attempted to get away from myth, magic and the passions; it was built on a language that contained certain structural assumptions from Stage I; and what man says is often determined by habits, feelings and conditioning that he takes for signs of irrefutable truth.

“The structure of our subjectpredicate language reveals the structure of our common-sense thinking. Every sentence in this bock has this structure, and whoever wants to practice thinking within the confines of strict verbal logic is locked within the house that Aristotle built when he accepted Greek language forms as the adequate expressions of man’s ‘natural’ thinking capacities.”

STAGE III: RELATING.

Historically this “revolution” took place from about 1500 to 1700 A.D., and initiated the era of classical, empirical science.

At this stage, you begin to question the value of your classifications. You take more factors into account by believing that the answers exist in Nature itself. All you have to do is observe, experiment, and ask questions of Nature. Then translate the answers in mathematical formulas and laws of probability. When the “answers” repeat themselves, you’ve discovered a Law of Nature.

Stage III did not do away with the quest for objectivity of Stage II, but rather emphasized inductive logic over deductive logic. The object of this scientific approach was no longer “what things are, it became what things do - or better, how they do it.” This was a move from a static to a dynamic world seen as a machine with a complex of interrelated parts.

Individuality is a strong value.

“It meant a strong reaction against whatever smacked of metaphysics, against mere intellectual understanding that does not lead to practical accomplishment.

It meant systematic observation and rigorous experimentation, both guided by laws of induction. It meant theories that could lead to further ‘discoveries.’ The human mind-in-action became attuned to a dynamic universe and developed methods to force ‘nature’ to reveal its secrets.” (The Art of Awareness. J.S. Bois)

STAGE IV: CREATIVE PROCESS (POSTULATING).

Historically initiated around the beginning of the 20th century, and issued in the Age of Relativity. At this stage, no human language is seen as adequate to mirror exactly the order of the world. This is awareness of human self-reflexiveness.

Our mental constructs are not images of an objective ‘reality’ they are seen as mirror images reflecting how we are ordering our experiences. And we use “mirrors” to see our “mirrors.” Objectivity as understood at the previous stages disappears. Dogmatism and determinism are replaced by constant reevaluation of our constructs now seen as postulates; this is necessary in a constantly changing world.

Reason and rationality have reached their limits; holism, evolution, awareness of awareness, and creative intuition leading to innovative postulates are among the central themes of Stage IV. The creative process is explicated by a logic called abduction. It becomes the mode of scientific inference introducing new postulates from which planning, experimenting and evaluating flow.

Spontaneous concern and consideration for others, spiritual love (agape), and the adulthood of humankind might characterize some of the chief values of Stage IV.

Those at home in Stage IV:

“. . . .live in a broad space-time context that encompasses thousands of centuries of life groping to master itself on the planet Earth. . . They find it more rewarding to make of altruism the dominant passion of their life. . . . they conclude that the next step in human evolution has to be the affective rather than at the discursive level. . . and they do not rely on carefully planned rehearsals of future encounters or situations. . .

They know that when we accept a set of

People who can’t imagine together cannot have intimacy in communication. We can communicate at formal levels, and levels of information exchange, but not usually in exchanges of values.

191

postulates we determine the pattern of our epistemic world, and from then on we observe, perceive, evaluate, judge, plan, act, and react according to the set of postulates and rules of conduct we have thus made our own. We live in the world we have constructed with the categories and the semantic structure we have inherited and adapted to our personal needs and tastes.”

(Breeds of Men. J.S. Bois)

STAGE V: PARTICIPATING.

Stage V has been associated with experiences that have been recorded all along in esoteric and mystical literature; these experiences are just now being studied scientifically. These are the experiences common to the artist, the mystic, and the creative scientist, but not uncommon to all of us in one way or another, and in any stage of human development. It might be described: as a feeling of One in which the accustomed signposts of systematic rationality are missing.

But the term “Stage V” does not refer merely to individual experiences of oneness or unification with the cosmos. Bois makes the distinction that the unifying experience can happen at any stage. But participating as a way of life could be seen as habitually living wholly. This involves living consciously and with as much corresponding movement as possible with the energies of a transformation that is active within our species at this moment. We are in a transition that we can neither foresee nor rationally understand thru past references, and we must fully and consciously participate in the movement of this happening, knowing that our mutual fate is at stake.

“And so, the world goes on. We accept it, trusting that, whatever are the present strains and sufferings, the final outcome will be victory in a metamorphosis for which we can only hope, without being able to picture to ourselves what it will be like when it comes.” (Epistemics. J.S. Bois)

THE ALLIES AND ENEMIES OF LEARNING AND THE EPISTEMOLOGICAL PROFILE Let me know that my only enemies are within myself. — Part of a Chumash prayer.

The term “enemy” etymologically means “not friend.” It was the term used by many different native American traditions who spoke of the four enemies a person faced in growing from experience to wisdom. An ally, of course, is one who is supportive of your cause.

The Epistemological Profile (EP) was invented by Gaston Bachelard and expanded by J. Samuel Bois to measure the hidden assumptions that usually go unnoticed within the visceral feelings of one’s “personal knowledge.” It’s like holding two objects, one in each hand, and “weighing” them to see which one is heavier. It’s a common experience in which the actual judging is not conscious. It is just given to you in your nervous system. By analogy, we weigh or evaluate our experiences of what is going on by how they affect us, and what we say about them according to our stage of development — where we are in our advancing knowledge, desirably toward growth in wisdom.

We all accumulate knowledge, but living it wisely is another story. The indented paragraphs below are the words of Don

192

Juan Matus from Castanada’s book, Tales of Power. Bois agreed that this scheme did fit the EP.

STAGE I

In a survival-oriented environment, as our ancient ancestors were, fear was an ally. It alerted one to danger. But fear of fear paralyzes, and then fear (the emotion, not the affect) becomes an enemy. Fear as an enemy is scripted in ways that prevents one from venturing out into the unknown and more ambiguous aspects of human experience. If fear paralyzes a person so that she will not venture beyond past experience, she is defeated by that enemy, and goes no further.

When a man starts to learn, he is never clear about his objectives. His purpose is faulty; his intent is vague. He hopes for rewards that will never materialize, for he knows nothing of the hardships of learning. He slowly begins to learn -- bit by bit at first, then in big chunks. And his thoughts soon clash. What he learns is never what one expects. Every step of learning is a new task, and the fear the man is experiencing begins to mount mercilessly, unyielding. His purpose has become a battle field.

STAGE II

Clarity is very important in dispelling fear. It is the limit that was crossed at stage 1. Clarity becomes an enemy when, after dispelling fear, one thinks one has arrived at a final conclusion. As LL Whyte said, “clarity is of aesthetic value, but not a motivater of change. Clarity carries no guarantee of any kind, of survival, of success, or of benefits. Clarity is an aesthetic, not a utilitarian value.” (The Universe of Experience, p. 80, Transaction Publishers). As an aesthetic value, it is very important in motivating interest in the next level of learning. “. . . clarity of mind erases fear. By then a man knows his desires; he knows how to satisfy those desires. He can anticipate the new steps of learning, and a sharp clarity surrounds everything.

The man feels that nothing is concealed. That clarity of mind, which is so hard to obtain, dispels fear, but also blinds. It forces the man never to doubt himself. It gives him the assurance he can do anything he pleases, for he sees clarity into everything.

If the man yields to this make believe power, he has succumbed to his second enemy, and will fumble learning until he winds up incapable of learning anything more.“ (To grow into the next stage of development): He must defy his clarity and use it only to see, and wait patiently and measure carefully before taking new steps; he must think, above all, that his clarity is almost a mistake . . . only a point before his eyes.

STAGE III

We experienced what it took to answer the need for clarity.

We learned to deal with fear. The affective environment of enjoyment and interest in our growing mastery mushroomed into a passion with a life of its own that infused and transformed the previous orders. This was the birth of modern science, bolstered by a faith in humanism and dreams of power. Power was the next ally that gave us the ability to give teeth to clarity.

This was power to do, and gave us the impression that we could do anything. When we went beyond the call of the need, it transformed into an enemy.

Power is the strongest of all enemies. And naturally the easiest thing to do is to give in; after all, the man is truly invincible.

He commands; he begins by taking calculated risks, and ends in making rules, because he is a master. A man who is defeated by power dies without really knowing how to handle it. Power is only a burden upon his fate.

(To defeat the third enemy): . . . he has to defy it, deliberately. He has to realize the power he has seemingly conqured is in reality never his. . . If he can see that clarity and power without control over himself are worse than mistakes, he will reach a point where everything is held in check. He will know then when and how to use his power.

STAGE IV

An insight emerged that, while it is possible to manipulate processes that are relatively separate from ourselves, it’s not so easy with the processes within ourselves. The image of a separation between ourself as actor, and ourself as observer turned out to be an illusion; a product of thought. We cannot escape ourselves as participants. Also, we saw ourselves situated between the determinants of biology, and the determinants of culture. The worlds in which we live, to a great extent, are shaped with human imagination.

The specifics of our experience at this stage of development brought us to the realization that “We have found a strange footprint on the shores of the unknown. We have devised profound theories, one after another, to account for its origins.

At last, we have succeeded in reconstructing the creature that made the footprint. And lo! It is our own. (Sir Arthur Eddington, English astronomer (1882 - 1944) Space, Time, and Gravitation, 1920.)

But this responsibility takes its toll on many. Tiredness from the task of defeating the first three enemies, and discouragement in seeing the semantic waste of our nihillistic times can lead to the desire to just lie down in peace and let the world have its way. The desire to limit the flow of learning can signal old age. “Once you stop learning you start dying.” (Albert Einstein) This enemy is the cruelest of all, the one he won’t be able to defeat completely, but only fight away. This is the time when a man has no more fears, no more impatient clarity of mind — a time when all his power is in check, but also the time when he has an unyielding desire to rest. But if the man sloughs off his tiredness, and lives his fate through, he can then be called a man of knowledge (wisdom), if only for a brief moment when he succeeds in fighting off his last, invincible enemy. That moment of clarity, power, and knowledge (wisdom) is enough.

In James Joyce’s Ulysses, Leopold Bloom lies submerged in an ocean of random facts: textbook tags, items of news, bits of history, cliches, ditties, slogans, jokes, operatic arias, scraps of popular science, and great volumes of superstitions, fantasies, technical accounts of the Dublin water supply, observations about hanged men, recollections of copulating dogs. The debris of learning, epic, faith and enlightenment pour over him. In this all encompassing ocean, he seems at times to dwell like a sea anemonie or any coelenteric creature. The human-made world in a process of endless abstraction suggests infinity of content. The minding process of humanity is endangered by the multitude of accounts and scripts that it makes of all matters, and which it heaps on its affective soul in ignorance of itself as a participant.

STAGE V

No enemies, no friends necessary. Self — fruit of the tree of morphic processes in unfoldingenfolding movement. (A morphic process: the fundamental principle of the development of pattern the ‘morphic principle’) We are movement.

“At one level man experiences freedom of choice; he feels himself to be a free agent seeking order and harmony. But at a deeper level, aware of more, he knows himself to be less than free, the instrument of forces greater than himself. There is no contradiction here. The old antithesis of free will and necessity vanishes in the hierarchical view of man. The “higher” levels of the mind express more specialized factors, the “lower” more general. At one level he experiences freedom of choice, but when he becomes aware of the deepest level of all, he loses free will and experiences the bliss of enjoying and serving a pervasive unity. For joy is simply vitality without discord.” (L.L Whyte, The Universe of Experience.)

I am this An equilbrium point A node of energies that is kept in existence As long as it is in tune with the whole vortex Of the cosmos in becoming.

What has been said so far applies to plants, trees and animals.

They are the resultants of pre-determined equiblriums That have followed one another In the course of eons.

Now has appeared a new kind of dynamic equilibrium — a human being.

Like that of a gyroscope Holding itself oriented by its own movement upon itself And able to slow down or speed up And modify in direction that self-movement.

Thus making it conform to The total cosmic movement He is able to apprehend And to control to some extent out of a participating unity.

– J.S. Bois

193

Be Hive of Healing Integrative Medical & Dental Center • 5017 Lewis Road Agoura Hills, CA 91301

BOOK YOUR APPOINTMENT TODAY! • (818) 452-4483 • www.behiveofhealing.com

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

HABIT VERSUS HOLISM A Conversational Model for a New Realm of Healing

Dr. Habib Sadeghi's Keynote Address at the

WORLD OF AROMATHERAPY VIII CONFERENCE UNIVERSITY OF UTAH

S P O N S O R E D

OCTOBER 21, 2016

B Y (NATIONAL ASSOCIATION FOR HOLISTIC AROMATHERAPY)

r. Sadeghi was honored to be chosen as the Keynote Speaker for The World of Aromatherapy VIII, the 2016 conference of the National Association for Holistic Aromatherapy (NAHA). The event was held at the University of Utah Conference Center and Botanical Garden, October 20-23.

Under the title Beyond Aromatics: Ancient Wisdom to Modern Science, the conference was host to experts from around the world, who were presenting the latest advancements in essential oil applications with regard to distillation and co-distillation techniques, disease treatment, and prevention, pregnancy and fertility support, behavioral endocrinology and children, treatment for anxiety and depression, plant morphology and more.

KEYNOTE SPEECH

“Silence like a cancer grows Hear my words that I might teach you Take my arms that I might reach you…”

- The Sound of Silence, Simon & Garfunkel These are the words I heard when I was diagnosed with cancer at the age of twenty-six. I was told that I had only a 30% chance of long-term survival. The diagnosis sounded like a death sentence to me. Hundreds of negative thoughts and gruesome images swirled around in my mind. They were impossible to ignore or silence.

As a medical student, I knew how serious my pathology reports were, but I also knew about the very real dangers of chemotherapy.

Surgery was an option, but either way, I was told, I would likely end up infertile and impotent.

196

The spiraling thoughts in my head were accelerating beyond my control, and when added to the panic-stricken advice from family members and pressure from my doctors to choose a course of treatment, I became completely overwhelmed. So I made a radical decision; in the midst of this hurricane of fear and uncertainty, I chose to ignore all of it. That’s not to say that I disregarded the fact that I had cancer, but I chose to ignore the idea that my options were limited and that my future was on a course I couldn’t change.

O P T I O N S & U N C E R TA I N T Y I chose to use that painful experience as a stepping stone toward conscious growth. I allowed myself to enter into the darkness of uncertainty. I sat in the heart of that darkness where the mystery of life resides, and began to understand that my true essence is untouchable and safe. With a sense of deep peace that’s difficult to describe, I rejected the option of a retro-peritoneal lymphadenectomy, a 16-hour surgery followed by multiple rounds of chemotherapy, and set off on a journey that opened me up to an incredible array of healing modalities, including the transformative power of herbs.

In the process of making peace with the darkness, I had the realization that there was a connection between my disease and the traumatic psycho-spiritual events I’d experienced much earlier in life. I realized how the limiting beliefs I’d formed at that earlier time preceded my phenotypic expression, which had eventually given birth to my cancer. In surrendering to a higher consciousness and by refusing conventional treatment, a seed of hope was planted, a hope that grew into an alternate vision of healing that ultimately became my reality.

Knowing that more stress was not going help my body heal, I opted to leave the high pressure environment of medical school

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

“I was blessed with the gift of experiencing the immense power herbs have to balance our physical terrain and open our minds to higher levels of consciousness.” and take a full-year sabbatical. I let my intuition lead me as I set off on what became a backpacking journey through India, Mexico and the Amazon. My journey led me to places where I had unfettered access to the world of herbs, in a way that I could never have imagined or experienced otherwise. I was blessed with the gift of experiencing the immense power herbs have to balance our physical terrain and open our minds to higher levels of consciousness.

This isn’t to say that during my travels I wasn’t haunted by restless dreams of my own suffering and death. It was not easy for me to forget that my doctors felt I had only a slim chance of survival, but making the choice to step out into the unknown provided me with some semblance of control and a feeling that I was moving in the right direction, even if I had no idea where I was going.

for the physical terrain to support disease. Lasting healing never comes about from simply cutting or scorching away the physical portion of the disease.

I soon understood that all the aspects of my life that were contributing to my disease - my dysregulated physiology, psychology and emotions, my stress levels, academic workload, personal relationships, and so on - needed to change in a profound way. I needed to create a new context for my life. Only I had the power to change my life in a way that would evoke healing.

I began working with an experienced herbalist to balance my dysregulated physiology. At the same time I made significant changes that supported my healing in other areas of my life.

I think it’s very appropriate that we’re here at the University of Utah today, in a state with a coat of arms featuring an image of a

DIALOGUE WITH THE DARKNESS Questioning the traditional medical model initiated my awakening to a new realm of healing. I had started a conversation with a higher consciousness that held all the possible outcomes to my situation, and that conversation was the beginning of my healing process. I realized that if healing was to come to me, it wouldn’t arrive in the form of a simple pill or through a medical procedure. Lasting healing happens when an organism holistically changes at the psycho-spiritual level, which makes it impossible

beehive with the State’s motto “Industry” written beneath it. For me, the beehive symbolizes the organization and cooperation required between a person and his or her higher consciousness in order to establish a conversational model that supports healing.

Every part of the self needs to be aligned and coordinated for healing to occur, as this is the basis of the ontological model of conversational healing. Because of my personal experience with this mental paradigm shift, and the healing I received, I named my medical practice “Be Hive of Healing Integrative Medical Center.”

197

MegaZEN // VOLUME 5 TM

“Lasting healing happens when an organism holistically changes at the psycho-spiritual level, which makes it impossible for the physical terrain to support disease.”

CONVERSATION FOSTERS COLL ABORATION As we adapt to the healthcare needs of the future, we must base our professional evolution on three key concepts. These include understanding the language of plants, recognizing and experimenting with different modalities of healing, and having the courage to speak up, not only in an effort to share information among ourselves, but to support the validity of what we do as a profession. By talking with like-minded people who have different perspectives on their healing practices, we get to co-create an evolving conversation that continues to grow and move herb science and aromatherapy forward.

This is what happens when we care-share our positive patient outcomes with each other. By speaking up, we create a professional environment in which new discoveries and miracles can occur.

Companies like the Rand Corporation and Google know how to inspire innovation through professional collaboration, so why shouldn’t we? In fact, communication is the tool by which humanity has always progressed forward. It is the way we ignite change.

SPEAKING UP & STEPPING OUT As healers, the importance of how, when, and to whom we speak can’t be overstated. In his book, Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking, Malcolm Gladwell gives a perfect example of the power of speaking in the right context. He provides eyeopening statistics showing that healthcare professionals who created a more intimate experience for their patients by speaking to them with more empathy and compassion, were far less likely to be sued, even when they made mistakes. Incredibly, it only took spending an extra three minutes with each patient to create this unique bond or conversational domain.

Knowing when and how to use our voices is crucial, especially when we experience pushback from naysayers, the media, or the traditional medical industry. The validity of our work depends on our willingness to lean in and support each other to co-create

198

new healing solutions. Are you brave enough to do that when the resistance increases? Or are you purposely making yourself small so no one notices what you’re doing, and so you won’t have to risk being called a quack?

Are you still stuck in that old realm of thinking where you falsely believe that you’re not smart enough because you didn’t go to the right school or choose the right profession, and therefore have nothing to offer that could benefit the advancement of our collective work? Are you still holding onto the misperception that it’s the content of what you know that makes the difference, rather than living as your whole-hearted authentic self while interacting with others? Are you brave enough to be who you really are in your personal and professional life, with no apologies or regrets?

CONTEXT PRECEDES CONTENT As herbalists, healers, acupuncturists, physicians and scientists, we are trained to study herbs, their interactions with each other, as well as their relationship with ourselves and our physiology. As herbal healers, it’s important to consider how the same herb can be brewed or cultivated differently in different hands, because it’s in these differences that our strength lies.

In the traditional medical model, which is mostly reductionistic, everything and everyone is dissected down to the tiniest particle where holism and the integrity of the healing process are lost.

Proponents of the traditional medical model argue that this is the proper method in that it allows content to be measured and the outcome to be determined. On the contrary, the alternative practitioner must be seasoned within the context of negative capability, which is the psycho-spiritual capacity to sit within the unknown, the place out of which true holistic healing can occur.

When I was thrust into the darkness of the unknown, my life hanging in the balance, I discovered the healing power of herbs which allowed me to place my experience into a new context and start a conversation that saved my life.

TO L E A R N M O R E A B O U T N A H A V I S I T W W W.N A H A .O R G.

“The First wealth is health.” R.W. Emerson

“Do anything, but let it produce joy.” - Walt Whitman

“Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames.”

- Rumi

201

“I sustain myself with the love of family.” - Maya Angelou

“The heart is the thousand-stringed instrument that can only be tuned with Love.” - Hafez

202

MISSING PREVIOUS ISSUES?

Buy your copy at behiveofhealing.com/megazen

BE HIVE OF HEALING I N T E G R AT I V E M E D I C A L & D E N TA L C E N T E R

5017 Lewis Road Agoura Hills, CA 91301

SUITE A |

SUITE B |

(818) 452-4483

(818) 578-4894

www.behivecenter.com

Magazine Design Persius Creative

Creative Direction Persius Creative

Editor in Chief Dr. Habib Sadeghi

Art Direction Persius Creative

Contributing Writers Dr. Habib Sadeghi Dr. Sherry Sami Lou Harvey-Zahra Gary David Dr. Cyrus Bandary Mary Abrams

Contributing Photographers Vivian Liu Photography Rodin Photography Kourosh M. Khajav Billy Farrell Agency

All content in this magazine is protected and may not be copied, reprinted or republished without written permission from Being Clarity Inc. All Rights Reserved. MegaZEN™ is a Registered Trademark.

PRINTED IN PRC