AT THE
REAL WOMEN | REAL CONVERSATIONS | REAL ISSUES
THE MONEY ISSUE JANUARY 2018
finance tips FOR YOU PAYING
children
TO DO CHORES
$50 WEEKLY SHOP:
IT'S POSSIBLE
NEW ZEALAND
REAL WOMEN | REAL CONVERSATIONS | REAL ISSUES
contents
JANUARY 2018
table talk
Jo in us
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6 TOYS MONEY CAN AND CANNOT BUY 10 MAKING FRUGAL COOL How one woman went from a job redundancy to almost paying off her own home. 13 WOULD YOU... Pay your children to do chores? 24 WHEN THERE'S NO MIRACLE LEFT Where is God when a miracle doesn't happen? 28 FEEDING THE HOMELESS OR OUR EGOS? Is it humble to post about our generosity on social media? 32 BOOK CORNER 34 SLOW DOWN, WEARY MUM
how-to 8
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PANELLISTS Fiona, Rachel, Shona, Melody, Rachel and Maryellen discuss a range of topics including current events, issues and family life.
16 MANDI MAKES Stain remover; DIY sunscreen; face wash oil; summer skincare spray. 18 FINANCIAL TIPS FOR WOMEN
22 Smart money decisions at whatever stage of your life. 22 COOKING WITH GIA & OLIVE No-cream Alfredo; tu-no salad; gluten-free pancakes.
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wellbeing
8 ASK THE EXPERTS 14 EXERCISE WITH ALISHA Keep fit on a budget.
PLUS healthy recipes, exercise tips, DIY projects and awesome hacks for around the home.
find us on social media @thetabletvshow
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EDITOR Melody Tan ASSISTANT EDITOR Vania Chew 150 Fox Valley Road Wahroonga NSW 2076 thetabletv.com
@ thetabletvshow
COPYEDITOR Tracey Bridcutt GRAPHIC DESIGN Theodora Amuimuia FREE MONTHLY COPY Julie Laws JulieLaws@adventistmedia.org.au
SEND ALL LETTERS AND SUBMISSIONS TO: At The Table magazine PO Box 1115, Wahroonga, NSW 2076 or email editorial@thetabletv.com At The Table magazine is available free of charge thanks to generous donations. We ask you to pass it on to your friends after you are finished with it. COVER PHOTO by Andrew Rich—iStock
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CEO: Kalvin Dever ABN 59 093 117 689 ISSN 2208-4010 VOLUME 2 NUMBER 1
January 2018
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editor
editor
TO THE
elcome to 2018! Does anyone else feel that time speeds up the older you get? There was one period of time in my adulthood when time seemed to stand still: the first four months of my son’s life. In amidst the bewilderment of caring for a newborn, recovering from the ordeal my body had gone through, and the endless cycle of eat, poop, sleep (the baby, not me), I was convinced my life was going to be an eternal hell of exhaustion and sleep deprivation. Then Elliott turned six months old and miraculously, everything changed. The next thing I knew we were celebrating his first birthday, his first steps, his first words and now, we’re in 2018. Time ramped up once again, and I’m seeing my life—and Elliott’s—hurtling before me. As a Christian, I try not to worry too much about life and what it brings (or doesn’t). After all, I do believe—and have personally experienced—God’s promise that He’s there for us and that we only need to keep Him in focus. (Of course, “being there” doesn’t always come in the form of answered prayers. Sometimes, it’s simply about peace or understanding. Hopal McClintock's story on page 24 illustrates just that.) As any other ordinary human, however, I often do find myself worrying about life and what it brings, especially when it involves money. It’s not so much about me wanting more to buy things but simply wanting a security blanket. This has been especially crucial since Elliott came along. I don’t think I’m alone in feeling this sentiment. As parents, we often feel it’s more important that we are able to provide for our children than for ourselves. It’s the reason why in this month’s At The Table, I took the excuse to speak with some financial advisers about what we, as women, can do to make our money work smarter so we don’t have to spend all our time worrying about it. See page 18 for all the important financial decisions we can make and impart to our children and hopefully, in this new year, there are some new strategies we can adopt when it comes to our money. Today, enjoy and treasure the precious time you are spending with your children, and I hope you’ll do so with the January issue of At The Table too!
Melody
I would like to place a monthly order for the magazine At The Table for our school community. Thank you to your team for a great magazine.
—Leanne
POGANIA—ISTOCK
january
s r e t let
from the
Thank you for such an attractive magazine, packed with interesting articles. Well done.
—Julene
The magazine has such a lovely feel and format, very accessible—bright and colourful with diverse articles. Congratulations on what you’re creating to tap into the “busy mum” demographic. Being one of those myself, I appreciate the humour and warmth of the show's panel—and consequently the editorial staff—as you approach topics and themes. We are positive about the possibility of utilising the At The Table magazine in our community. Thank God for the generosity of donors willing to make these resources readily available!
—Lili
At The Table is a BEAUTIFUL magazine!! Thank you for sending my copies!! You did such a gorgeous job on Rollo’s garden [see our October 2017 issue or go to thetabletv.com]. He cried when I gave him his copy and he saw the photo of him and [his late wife] Christine. Thank you ever so much for printing it. I think you’re doing an awesome job. Keep up the good work. What you do there means so much, to so many people :) You’re really running a gorgeous publication, which I’m sure readers will absolutely appreciate.
—Suvi
Drop us a line!
What did we get right? What can we do better? What are the conversations you're having? What are the issues you're facing? The author of our letter of the month wins a free Arnie’s Shack: The Complete First Series four-disc DVD set, suitable for your children (or nieces or nephews)! Write to us at editorial@thetabletv.com
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MONEY
BUY
MONEY
LEGO Star Wars Millennium Falcon
Giant cardboard box
$1300
LEGO and Star Wars. What more could little (and not-solittle) boys—and girls—want? With 7500 pieces, it’s one of the biggest and most detailed LEGO models ever created. Hours of fun. Just don’t lose track of the pieces or you’ll be wishing you splurged on extra-padded slippers during middle-ofthe-night toilet runs.
Technically, it’ll probably cost a fair bit to purchase the product that comes in a cardboard box big enough to contain a small child, but considering it (the box, not the child) would otherwise be destined for the recycle bin, this comes pretty close to being free. Draw some doors and windows, cut out some holes and voilà, cubby house.
Swarovski crystalsEncrusted Etch-a-Sketch $2000
This classic toy gets a facelift— and some bling—with 14,400 hand-set Swarovski crystals. These are limited-edition models however, so you may have a bit of trouble laying your hands on one for your child.
DIY baby toys
Ride-on giraffe
$2500
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Carnival Carousel $12,000
Going to a fun fair may not be your idea of fun: getting the kids ready for an entire day out, the crowd, potential meltdowns . . . so why not take the stress out of your life by bringing the fun fair to your home? There’s even space for two of your child’s favourite friends to ensure they stay socialised.
FLUXFACTORY, GEARSTD, PEOPLEIMAGES, PTAXA—ISTOCK
Every child loves riding on something: a pony, a bicycle, your shoulders . . . so why not cultivate their love for this graceful African mammal with a life-size (240-centimetre tall) version? It holds up to 70 kilograms, so you'll get your money's worth since it’ll be some time before they grow out of this toy.
' BUY
Butcher’s paper Your local butcher would probably be happy to spare a few sheets of butcher’s paper that you can use to “wallpaper” the bottom half of your walls and doors at home. Then give your child a crayon and let them unleash their inner Picasso without fear of permanently marking your walls.
Let’s face it. As mothers, we probably have a bunch of inspirational ideas for DIY toys saved on Pinterest with absolutely no time to make them. But there are dried beans in an empty plastic bottle that can serve as a rattle, baking trays that work as drums, and babies can spend a surprisingly long time repeatedly removing and putting the lid back on an empty container.
Homemade playdough Their colours get irreversibly mixed, they dry up and while they’re labelled as non-toxic, you probably don’t want your child eating any of that stuff. So you could pay $2 a tub for readymade Play-Doh, or mix some flour, salt, water and food colouring, and end up with a product that doesn’t hurt as much when you throw it out or consume it (still not advisable).
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e h t as k experts
Q How old should my child be before I can encourage them to make a lifelong commitment to Jesus? Stephanie, via email
OUR PANEL:
HEATHER WINTER MIDWIFE SYDNEY ADVENTIST HOSPITAL
NEIL GINSBERG PAEDIATRICIAN SYDNEY ADVENTIST HOSPITAL
TRISH GUY NUTRITIONIST SANITARIUM HEALTH & WELLBEING
KAREN HOLFORD FAMILY THERAPIST HEARTWORDS
ANDREW DARON PRATT PENNINGTON KIDS' CHAPLAIN GP SEVENTH-DAY SANCTUARY LIFESTYLE ADVENTIST CHURCH CLINIC
PETER WOOD OBSTETRICIANGYNAECOLOGIST SYDNEY ADVENTIST HOSPITAL
There are a few different intermittent fasting regimes promoted, ranging from eating only within a specified timeframe over the day, to one or more days each week with no or limited food intake, to various religious fasts. A comprehensive review of intermittent fasting was published earlier this year. It found there is some promising evidence about the benefits, however these are mainly from studies conducted on animals, or short-term human studies involving small numbers of people. Overall, the available evidence from humans suggests intermittent fasting can help you shed some of those unwanted kilos, however it’s not likely to be more effective or long-lasting than other forms of weight loss, such as reducing your overall food intake. The benefits beyond weight loss, such as reductions in inflammation markers and blood fats, may look promising, but the evidence is still very early and somewhat limited. It seems intermittent fasting is likely to be more effective when combined with regular exercise, as would all health goals. My advice is to see an accredited practicing dietitian, who can work with you on your food and health goals and provide practical food ideas that work for you and your family. —Trish
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IZUSEK, PIXDELUXE—ISTOCK
Q I’ve been told intermittent fasting helps shed kilos faster than traditional diets, as well as reducing inflammation and other heart disease risks. Is that true? Caroline, via email
Children are able to make decisions at a very young age. Research indicates between the ages of five and 12, lifelong habits, values, beliefs and attitudes are formed and the brain is most receptive to spirituality. It takes until a child is about seven to be able to understand abstract concepts and distinguish fact from fantasy. A whole new world opens up to these children as they begin school and form close friendships apart from family members. Their concept of God becomes much more personal at this age and they often want to be able to give their life to Jesus at this time as well. Take every decision seriously. Remember that children do not get a “junior” version of the Holy Spirit—God can work on your child’s heart as much as anyone else’s. Do not push your child. There is no merit in comparing your child to another and feeling pressure that they too need to make a commitment. It does not mean a child is not spiritual if they have not requested to make a commitment. We each respond to God differently and the main thing is that parents and mentors walk beside the child and affirm their decision at every age and stage of their journey with Him. When faith is not affirmed, children are left feeling unsupported or valued. We need to show them we take their commitment seriously and that we will be beside them in their faith journey. —Daron
Q My husband and I are expecting our first child and I’m a little daunted as I anticipate the day we bring our baby home and fend for ourselves! What can I expect as normal newborn behaviour? Alicia, via email How exciting! It’s perfectly normal to be nervous, but do remember, midwifery and medical staff will do a thorough assessment of your newborn and help you learn what’s normal with your baby before you leave their care. Here are a few tips: • Umbilical cords will dry into a scale and usually fall off after about 7–10 days. • Small spits or vomits (called posseting) are normal for newborns as their tummies are still small and the valve that empties milk into their stomach is quite loose. This can often take a few months to tighten and as your baby becomes more upright, the problem will usually go away. • Babies’ poo changes in the first few weeks from black to greeny brown while milk is coming in and, when the milk is in, to yellow with little “curds” (small white flecks). Babies’ poo when yellow is quite watery but is a positive indication that your baby is getting fat in the milk. If babies’ poo is persistently green, seek advice. The number of poos your baby does per day will vary and they may not necessarily poo every day. • Similarly, urine output can vary but a good guide is approximately six wet nappies per day. • Babies will take several weeks to adjust their circadian rhythm (the adjustment between night and day). Babies develop their own pattern naturally if their needs of feeding and comforting are met frequently. • Bathing doesn’t always have to be attended every day. Cleaning of the head, face and bottom will be sufficient at times. The first few weeks are a unique opportunity for you and your newborn to bond, love and learn about each other! —Heather
SUBMIT YOUR QUESTION TO OUR PANEL OF EXPERTS Write to us at: editorial@ thetabletv.com THE INFORMATION PROVIDED IS GENERAL IN NATURE AND DOES NOT TAKE INTO ACCOUNT YOUR PERSONAL SITUATION. YOU SHOULD CONSIDER WHETHER THE INFORMATION IS APPROPRIATE TO YOUR NEEDS, AND WHERE APPROPRIATE, SEEK PROFESSIONAL ADVICE.
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making
Retrenchment turned her life upside down, but also gave Jody Allen a kickstart towards good health and financial freedom.
frugal
By Melody Tan
I
don’t like cheap people,” Jody Allen declares to me during our phone conversation. Thankfully, she isn’t referring to me. The founder of the website, Stay at Home Mum, one of Australia’s biggest mothers’ networks and built on a philosophy of living frugally, is simply explaining to me the difference between being frugal and being cheap. “Being cheap is being a tightwad, but I’m being frugal because I’m working towards something, and that makes a big difference,” she tells me. Being frugal was not Jody’s forte to begin with, but in 2009, she was made redundant from her job. It’s devastating news even in the best circumstances, but Jody’s was a little different: she was pregnant with her second child, who would be born 12 months after her first baby.
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“For about four years, we lived from pay to pay,” Jody recalls. “I had no food in the house, except for the very basics, and we had to make do to keep our house. It was really hard to do. I was so used to spending $250 a week on [food] shopping for two people and all of a sudden, we’ve got two little children and only $50.” Desperate to stretch her dollar just that little bit further, Jody turned to Facebook for help, asking for the community’s moneysaving tips. One website, four books and a successful business later, one could say she found more than she bargained for. Jody’s latest book is The $50 Weekly Shop: Weekday Dinners, and it’s full of helpful, practical, money-saving advice, from a list of must-have cheap pantry staples, affordable substitutes for expensive ingredients that taste just as good, to ways of getting more out of your food. There’s even the unexpected benefit of better health.
SUPPLIED
cool
In an age of smashed avocados and kale salads, Jody is adamant we can eat healthily on a cheap budget and believes superfoods are simply marketing. “Quinoa is really expensive and it doesn’t even taste nice,” she says. No wonder she promises one won’t find it (or kale) in her book. Oats, according to Jody, are just as tasty and best of all, cheap. “Oats are not just for breakfast. You can use them in smoothies or as breadcrumbs on rissoles.” Another cheap, healthy eating tip is to regrow vegetables from scraps, and in her book, she has dedicated a whole chapter to frugal gardening. And you know the plants she suggests will be easy to grow since the advice is coming from a self-confessed “brown thumb who kills everything”. (Jody also says she can’t cook and thinks she’s still a really bad one, which hasn’t stopped her from writing a recipe book—which is what The $50 Weekly Shop
essentially is. As she says, “It’s a cookbook for people who don’t like to cook.”) Her days of living from pay to pay are certainly over—and they’ve nearly paid off the mortgage on the house—but Jody still believes in being thrifty. “Frugality is in every aspect of my life. It’s more to give us financial freedom these days,” she says. All the furniture in her home is secondhand—Jody jokingly mentions a gorgeous 150-year-old church pew that she’s sure is gaining in value—and she has a network of friends who would hand down their children’s clothes. “For me, everything is about home and family, and if working hard and going without a few things mean my family are happier and healthier at home, then it’s worth it. I want to make sure I own my house, I don’t have debt, I can sleep well at night because I know my bills are paid and my family will eat well.” There is also a certain paradox to Jody’s “going without” because by doing so, she can actually “now afford to do the little things for the kids. And I don’t really want for anything. The more you have, the more you want”. In a society where we’re constantly marketed to with the latest and the best, where almost everything is disposable and where even the economy is dependent on consumer spending, Jody’s message is highly countercultural—and deeply relevant: In Australia, average household debt has almost doubled over the past 12 years and in New Zealand, private debt is more than four times’ worse than public debt. “I have found freedom through not spending. My husband and I don’t fight or worry about money.” It’s a family environment many of us would probably love to have. Jody still only spends around $80 a week for groceries but as her boys will be teenagers soon, she’s well prepared for those days to soon be over. “I’m aware spending $50 a week is not for everyone,” she says. “My book is about showing people that they can save money. Every family is different, but even if it’s just saving $10 every shop from using my book, I’m happy because it means you’re putting some things into practice. It’s just about getting better at it and thinking about food and ways to substitute where it can taste just as good. Have lots of veggies—there are ways to cook the same but use cheaper ingredients, and that’s what I’m trying to teach people.” According to Jody, her adopted lifestyle has also made her a better cook, a better mum and a better money manager. Saving money on groceries essentially means buying less processed food and more raw ingredients. It has meant spending more time in the kitchen (“There’s always a payoff.”) and it forced Jody—who didn’t really know much about cooking when she moved out of home—to spend more time in the kitchen, learning from old Country Women’s Association cookbooks. “Being in the kitchen, my kids were always at my feet, so I got to spend a lot more quality time with them,” she says of how frugality made her a better mum. As for being a better money manager, “When I only had $50 to spend a week, I had to make sure every cent was accounted for. With every other dollar that we earned, it had to go to a certain area, so I had to know where each dollar was going every week.” Not every cent however, is created equal, according to Jody,
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10 items that you
would you...
should always buy generic
PAY YOUR CHILDREN TO DO CHORES?
ACCORDING TO JODY
who also tries to promote social consciousness when it comes to spending (or saving). In her book, right in the first chapter on how you can get started to reduce your grocery bill, Jody has a section titled, “Remember that some things are worth paying for.” By that, she means “doing the right thing”: buying locally grown or produced food. “I live in a rural area. A lot of my friends are farmers. You have to be socially responsible when you can,” she says. “Don’t buy cage eggs, that’s just cruel. I’d happily pay extra for milk because just down the road, the money goes towards the kids. Because I see it first hand, I know the people who I’m buying from, it makes a difference. I really am passionate about supporting rural communities. “It’s not just about saving money, but to help someone by spending—if you can afford it. If you can only afford to buy the $3 milk, I’m never going to make you feel bad about it. If you need to feed your family, you do that, but if you can, great, I do encourage it. Some families can’t and I would never want to make them feel bad about that.” What Jody is working hard towards, however, is trying to make everybody understand the benefits of living a simple life. “I’d like to make frugal cool. I’m working on it,” Jody laughs. “It’s hard. There’s still a stigma associated with being frugal but when you see the benefits that come with it—you live happier and healthier, you have so many less worries—it’s actually a really nice lifestyle.” The way Jody sells it, it’s a wonder not more of us have adopted frugality as a way of life.
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2.
Flour
3.
Sugar
4.
Butter
5.
Milk
6.
Cheese
7.
Canned tomatoes & beans
8.
Frozen vegetables
9.
Cereal and grain products
10.
Fresh fruit and vegetables
(Look, if you can afford it, buy the farmers’ brand and support the dairy industry. If you can’t, go generic.)
(oats, puffed rice, etc.)
SHIRONOSOV—ISTOCK
I don’t really want for anything. The more you have, the more you want.
Olive oil
IMAGE SUPPLIED, ILLUSTRATIONS-SUDOWOODO—ISTOCK
flour
1.
would...
would not...
EUGENIE PEPPER SYDNEY, NEW SOUTH WALES
BELINDA MANNA SYDNEY, NEW SOUTH WALES
I pay my kids to do chores. Some say chores are a responsibility children should do without pay and that kids should do them anyway, but mine wouldn’t. I finally got my kids to help with chores by implementing a point system: the amount of money they get depends on how many jobs they do in a week. They do the job and they get paid accordingly. Different levels of pay are associated with different tasks. So if they want to earn more, then they work harder, do more jobs and get more money. My daughter is eight years old and my son is nine, and they have really gotten motivated since we started using incentives, or as others may say, since we started bribing them! It is working for us. Finally, my kids are so keen to help out and do jobs around the house. I am loving it. They are sweeping the floor, emptying and loading the dishwasher, making their beds, vacuuming and more. I think giving kids pocket money gives them an understanding of the value of money. By giving my children pocket money, it helps them learn how much things cost and in doing so, teaches the value of money. The pocket money goes straight into their savings account so they are learning about savings. They can see how putting regular small amounts of their pocket money away each week results in being able to treat themselves to something big that they want at the end of the year. I also think pocket money is teaching kids that if they work hard, they will reap the rewards. I think it contributes to a good work ethic and I hope it will inspire them to become entrepreneurial: if you put in the effort you will get a reward.
Children should not be educated with a return. Giving children chores within your household teaches responsibility and independence; giving money to reward the child is robbing them of understanding the purpose of these key fundamental lessons in life. Giving money to your child to take the rubbish out, clean their room or cut the grass is to say, “Only through work you will be rewarded.” Money is a gift. As a parent, you should love your child and show this without them having to do something for you. It’s great for a child to help around the house but money, in my opinion, is not the way to go. We should be giving money because of love not because of slavery. Children are a blessing and should be treated as so. If you communicate with your child and give them the ability to understand why their chores are important as a family and are a gift—because of the love of helping the family, and being a part of it—they would want to help. Money should be hidden and placed in a bank until they are old enough to access it. This is important to our Italian culture, as we believe money is the root of all evil. If you start raising a child where they get used to receiving money for every move they make, you are encouraging a greedy child and greed is one of the seven deadly sins from a religious point of view.
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EXERCISEwith Alisha
HOME EXERCISES TRICEPS DIPS ON CHAIR
SPINE CURLS WITH BALL
KEEP FIT ON A BUDGET
STEP-UPS
DO 20 REPS PER WORKOUT
A
ccording to the Australian Bureau of Statistics, in 2016, fitness and gym activities were the second most participated type of sport and recreation by Australians. And in 2014, the approximately four million Australians participating spent $8.5 billion on fitness and its associated costs—that’s an average of $2000 a person! The question worth pondering is whether it is necessary to spend that much in order to keep fit? I say no. In fact, I know a lot of people who pay for a gym membership to have access to its equipment and classes, but barely get there eight times a year! Keeping fit is less about how much you spend and more about being absolutely certain why it’s a must for you, and then finding ways to be active that you enjoy. Here’s a breakdown of how you can keep fit depending on your budget.
DO 10–20 REPS PER WORKOUT
DO 20 REPS EACH SIDE PER WORKOUT
BODY WEIGHT EXERCISES PUSH-UPS
SQUATS (WITH GOBLET)
LUNGES
DO 10 PER WORKOUT
DO 15 REPS PER WORKOUT
DO 20 REPS EACH SIDE PER WORKOUT
FREE You already have the tool you need to keep fit: your body! Done effectively, using your body weight and incorporating strength, cardio and flexibility exercises into a routine can be all you need. In addition, your home or a nearby park can provide free “equipment” too. For example, you can use cans of beans as makeshift weights, stairs for step-ups or stair runs, or lift a pile of books (big ones are best). Using body weight exercises requires you to push yourself in order to get results. This can be achieved by doing higher amounts of repetitions per exercises, and/or using interval training (for example, 30 seconds of work, 15 seconds of rest).
HOME ESSENTIALS Setting yourself up with some basic fitness equipment at home can be cost-effective and take your fitness to a new level. My suggestion for equipment would be: two sets of dumbbells or kettlebells (a lighter set for arm exercises and a heavier set for leg exercises), a resistance band, a foam roller and a chin-up bar. All of these are available from Kmart and Aldi also occasionally has fitness equipment for really affordable prices.
Y
GIVEAWA
free d Alisha's box a lo n w o D hy Lunch The Healt with recipes lled eBook, fi ids will love: your k bit.ly/ Ebook unchbox HealthyL
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SUPPLIED
If you are going to pay money for fitness services, I strongly suggest paying for group or one-on-one training, as you will get much more than just access to equipment. You’ll get accountability, support, motivation and personalised care, and most of all, the results you are after. The take-home message is you can keep fit on a budget. Get creative with your workouts and if you can, invest in some basic equipment for your home and you’re all set to go.
BERNARD BODO—ISTOCK
CLASSES
ALISHA Ten minutes every day is all you need to start on your journey to become fit and healthy. Watch Unleash Fit Living's Alisha share her workouts on the At The Table TV show. FOR MORE
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UNLEASHFITLIVING
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i d n Ma
NEW ZEALAND
MAKES DIY SUNSCREEN* INGREDIENTS 90 g organic, unrefined, virgin coconut oil 65 g carrier oil (such as almond oil) 28.5 g beeswax or soy wax 27.5 g organic, unrefined shea butter ½ tsp vitamin E oil 40 g non-nano, uncoated zinc oxide
SUMMER SKINCARE SPRAY
(RELIEVE ITCHY SKIN, BUG BITES AND SUNBURN)
ITEMS STYLED AND PHOTOGRAPHED BY KEVIN PATERSON AND ANDREW JOHNSON
METHOD
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STAIN REMOVER INGREDIENTS 1 tbsp baking soda 8 tbsp hydrogen peroxide 4 tbsp dish soap
METHOD Combine baking soda and hydrogen peroxide, then add dish soap. Store in a dark container in a dark place. To use, apply directly to stain and rub in with fingers or an old toothbrush. Let sit for 15 minutes to one hour then launder as normal.
1. Add coconut and carrier oils, beeswax and shea butter in a glass bowl. 2. Melt ingredients by double boiling (placing the glass bowl over a pot of shallow, slightly simmering water). Stir with a whisk to help it along. 3. When completely melted, carefully remove the glass bowl from the stove and wipe down any condensation (do not allow water to get into the product). 4. Add vitamin E oil. 5. Place glass bowl on a kitchen scale and slowly add zinc oxide, being careful not to inhale it, until the scale shows 40 g. Note: The process needs to be done slowly because as the zinc settles, the weight will increase. 6. Whisk, whisk, whisk and whisk some more, then carefully pour into a container. 7. Leave to set. *Sunscreen is not waterproof and will need to be reapplied every hour, or after being in water or excessive sweating. It is always advised to cover as much skin as possible with cool, loose-fitting clothing.
INGREDIENTS 2 tbsp Epsom salt 1 cup warm water 1 tbsp apple cider vinegar 4 drops lavender essential oil
METHOD
FACE WASH OIL
1. Dissolve Epsom salt in warm water and allow to cool. 2. Mix apple cider vinegar and lavender essential oil. Shake before use.
INGREDIENTS 1 part castor oil 2 parts almond oil 1 part grapeseed oil Optional: A few drops of tea tree oil (for acne-prone skin), lavender essential oil (for dry, itchy skin) or 1 tsp Epsom salts (to add gentle exfoliation)
METHOD Mix ingredients into a pump or squeeze bottle. To use, gently massage about 1 tsp onto damp skin to remove make-up and cleanse skin.
MANDI Good for your skin and great for the environment. Watch Mandi make these earth-friendly natural recipes on the At The Table TV show. FOR MORE
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financial tips FOR WOMEN
STARTING YOUR CAREER Money management advice for the different stages of your life. By Melody Tan
This is probably one of the most exciting stages of your life as you take that step towards financial independence. While it is perfectly fine to splurge and treat yourself with your first (few) pay cheques, make sure you don’t set yourself up for a lifetime of debt and worry. As Marion May, founder and CEO of the Thalia Stanley Group, a wealth advocacy firm in Melbourne, says, “This is the most important time to be focusing on forming good budgeting, saving and investing habits.”
AUTOMATE YOUR SAVINGS
Marion believes women at this age should aim to save a minimum of 10 per cent of their weekly income. The best way to achieve this is to automatically debit the amount from your salary, so it goes into a designated savings account separate from your regular spending one. “Proactively invest your saved 10 per cent into assets that gain value over time,” Marion says. Also, make sure you create a budget so you can keep track of your income and expenditure, avoiding spending leakage.
AVOID DEBT
“Avoid ‘buy now pay later’ schemes at all costs as these can quickly lead to unnecessary debt,” says Marion. For big-ticket items such as cars and furniture, she advises, “These should be saved up for then purchased, rather than bought or done on lay-by. And, if borrowing money, ensure the minimum possible interest rate and a set timeframe for repayment.”
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BABUSTUDIO, MACROVECTOR—ISTOCK
SALARY SACRIFICE INTO YOUR SUPER
Your retirement is probably the last thing you’re thinking about when you start your first job, but thanks to compound interest (interest calculated on the initial principal and also on the accumulated interest of previous periods of a deposit or loan), saving at the start of your career to support yourself when you’ve stopped working will probably be one of the wisest financial decisions you’ll ever make. If you’re planning to have children, the extra (it can be as little as $50 a week) you put into your super now will go a long way to adding to your retirement funds for when you stop work temporarily. This is on top of the 10 per cent you’re automatically saving from your weekly pay.
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DINKS
(DOUBLE INCOME NO KIDS) Ah, the married life. Isn’t it amazing to wake up every morning with the love of your life next to you? Your focus financially should be on saving as much as you can, especially if you are planning to have children. With two incomes, you will also have a little more flexibility with your budget, so try to make some smart investment choices with the extra money.
LIVE ON ONE INCOME “If you are both earning the national average wage, given economies of scale—the living costs of two people are only slightly higher than one, not double—the goal should be to save all of one salary and live off the other,” says Marion. Living like this will not only boost your savings, but will be great practice for when you need to live on one income, be that an unexpected retrenchment or when babies arrive.
SETTING UP PASSIVE INCOME SOURCES Passive income is money derived from activities in which you’re not actively engaged, such as rental income or share dividends. We all love getting money for nothing, but passive income is especially important for when we are no longer able to work, be that because of parental duties or retirement. If you purchase an investment property pre-children (don’t wait till you’re pregnant, as banks assume you’ll be out of the workforce once bub arrives and will be less likely to approve a loan), the hope is you would have gained sufficient capital growth by the time they’re in high school. The benefits of investment properties for parents, according to Marion, “are tax minimisation, security and peace of mind around the child’s future. In addition, channelling the additional income from the tax savings and the rental income into personal or bad debt (home loan) can accelerate debt reduction.”
REVIEW AND NEGOTIATE
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MACROVECTOR, JULYNXA—ISTOCK
Your children are going to take up most of your time and focus (and expenses)—and rightly so—so this isn’t the time for risky financial decisions. Instead, take time to manage and stick to your budget and ensure you have all the adequate insurances in place, such as income protection, life cover and home and car insurances.
CONTINUE INVESTING
SAVE FOR THEIR EDUCATION
While you may think it’s years away before your newborn goes to school, starting to save for your child’s education now makes it easier to meet the necessary expenses later, especially if you are considering private schooling (which could be as much as $35,000 a year). Justin suggests setting up an investment bond or there are other options such as education savings plans, family trusts or the good old high-interest savings accounts.
GET INVESTMENTS IN PLACE
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(WITH KIDS)
Helen Baker, a financial adviser based in Brisbane, Queensland, and author of On Your Own Two Feet: Steady Steps to Women’s Financial Independence, believes while there may be additional expenses with children, it’s still necessary to make some sound investments during this time. “There may not be a lot of money left for investing, but the problem if you don’t is 10 or 20 years later when your children are grown up, you’ll be behind the eight ball when it comes to retirement planning,” she says.
Get into a habit of spending within a budget as a couple and it will be easier to manage your family’s finances when children come along. As Justin McMillan, a wealth coach from Perth, Western Australia, advises, you should have an annual audit of expenses just so you know what you are spending more (or less) on and adjust your budget accordingly. Also, service providers often rely on our tendency to “set and forget”, so put aside a day every year to review and renegotiate your contracts with phone, insurance, power and gas companies—you may just get a better deal!
You are less likely to be approved for loans when you are on one salary and have dependants (the non-working spouse and children), so this is an ideal time to either purchase your family home or an investment property. “This is a critical time to make further investments of a substantial nature, such as shares or properties,” says Marion. At the same time, she warns, “The financial structures that underpin your assets are critical to financial success. So ensure safety buffers, that you are not too heavily geared and that you have a built-in safety back-up plan in place.”
THE MOST EXHAUSTING TIME OF YOUR LIFE
SUPERANNUATION
Y
GIVEAWA
ation l consult rion a n o s r e Win a p h advocate Ma lt cial with wea seat in her finan a r . o p Mays orksho literacy w er interview h tch Also, wa 3, Episode 3 of n o s a e fo at in S . More in / w o h s e h t letv.com www.tab Giveaway y a s MarionM
You may not be contributing as much into your superannuation at this stage, but what you can do is determine how the funds are invested. “Get control of your super, make sure nominations are set up and review if your insurances should be inside or outside your super,” says Helen.
ESTATE PLANNING
It’s something most people prefer not to think about, but with dependant children, it is critical you determine what happens to your assets should you unexpectedly die. Writing a will is essential, and according to Helen, there are also ways to stretch out money from a will so that they are paid out in a way that reduces your tax.
FUN RETURNS
(ALMOST EMPTY-NESTERS) Yes, lazy Sunday morning sleep-ins are about to return and you will finally have food in your fridge that doesn’t mysteriously go missing the second you put it in. Your children are just about to leave home and retirement is on the horizon.
REDUCE DEBT
Now is the time to catch up and also make additional investments based on what your shortfall is for retirement. It’s also a critical time to ensure you have up-to-date wills in place and have all insurance needs and coverage reviewed.
MAKE SUPERANNUATION YOUR FRIEND
“Superannuation is possibly the most tax-effective structure in which you can save for your retirement,” Helen says. So investigate ways in which you can contribute more to your superannuation—and how it’s invested—so you can convert it into a pension and income stream when you retire.
What are the most important financial skills parents can impart to their children? “Teach them to save 10 per cent of everything they earn and invest it in assets that grow in value over time,” says Marion. Helen agrees, adding that children need to learn to “spend less than you earn and borrow less than you can afford”. It also doesn’t hurt to (and encourage your children to) see a financial adviser at the different stages of your life. After all, as Helen says, the earlier you do so, the sooner you can make investment plans, which often yield better results over the long term.
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COOKING with Gia & Olive
NEW ZEALAND
PREPARATION TIME: 5 MINUTES + 1 HOUR SOAKING TIME COOKING TIME: 18 MINUTES SERVES: 6
2.
3.
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Soak cashews in a small bowl of water for 1 hour. Boil potatoes and onions in a pot of water until they are soft. Blend all ingredients in a blender until smooth, adding more water if necessary.
PREPARATION TIME: 10 MINUTES COOKING TIME: 10 MINUTES SERVES: 3
INGREDIENTS
INGREDIENTS
Cashew-Mustard Dressing ½ cup water ½ cup raw cashews 3 tbsp lemon juice 2 tbsp Dijon mustard 2 tsp apple cider vinegar 1 garlic clove 2 to 3 tsp kelp granules
1 chia seed egg ¾ cup milk ½ tsp vanilla extract ¾ cup rice flour ¼ cup almond flour 2 tsp coconut sugar ¼ tsp salt 2 tsp baking powder 1 banana, roughly mashed
1.
2.
ITEMS STYLED AND PHOTOGRAPHED BY KEVIN PATERSON
1.
PREPARATION TIME: 25 MINUTES COOKING TIME: 0 MINUTES SERVES: 5
METHOD
INGREDIENTS
METHOD
GLUTEN-FREE PANCAKES
Salad 2 x 400g tinned chickpeas, drained and rinsed (or 3 cups cooked chickpeas) 3 celery ribs, sliced or chopped ¼ cup red onion, finely chopped
NO-CREAM ALFREDO
¾ cup natural unsalted cashews 2 potatoes, roughly chopped 1 onion, roughly chopped 1 cup soy milk 2 tsp Italian mixed herbs 2 garlic cloves 1 tsp pink or Celtic salt
TU-NO SALAD
3.
Blend all dressing ingredients in a blender until smooth. Set aside for 15 minutes to allow cashews to soften. Pulse chickpeas in a food processor until they are broken but still flaky, being careful not to overblend. Transfer to a large bowl and add celery and onion. Stir the dressing into the salad.
METHOD 1.
2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7.
Make chia seed egg (see our November 2017 issue or go to thetabletv.com for recipe). Mix chia seed egg, milk and vanilla extract in a bowl. In a separate bowl, mix rice and almond flour, coconut sugar, salt and baking powder. Combine ingredients from both bowls and mix well. Mix in mashed banana, being careful not to over-mash it. Pour ¼ cup of batter onto a hot non-stick pan, shaping it into a pancake. Cook on medium to low heat for about 2 minutes, or until golden-brown. Use a spatula to slowly unstick the sides and centre before flipping the pancake. Cook for another minute or until golden-brown. Serve with fresh fruit and a drizzle of maple syrup.
*Do not make more than double the recipe at a time as it does not work well.
GIA & OLIVE The world's cutest sous-chef and her talented mother show us how easy it is to be healthy. Watch how quickly Gia and Olive can make these recipes on the At The Table TV show. FOR MORE
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23
WHEN THERE'S NO
miracle
Hopal McClintock wrestles with God after the loss of her baby.
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O
ur world was shattered, turned upside down and sideways in a matter of seconds. Forever our hearts would be left with the scar—a hole that nothing on earth can fill. It felt like God had let us down, like He was nowhere to be found when we really needed Him. Where was our miracle? Let me back up a little. It had taken us only three months to fall pregnant. Our families were ecstatic—the first grandson on one side of the family, and the third on the other side. Every day of the pregnancy we prayed for Bub. Every day we sang him beautiful Bible songs and told him about Jesus.
KATARZYNA BIALASIEWICZ—ISTOCK
LEFT
The nursery was fully decorated and ready for its tiny new occupant. The hospital bag was packed, ready to go at a moment’s notice. Bub himself was in perfect position. Only the arrival day was taking its own time. We tried everything to encourage Bub to come but nothing worked. At last, the much-anticipated day arrived and we headed off to the hospital. It was June 1, 2013, the day we would finally meet and hold our son. In the labour ward I tried to brave the pain as yet another contraction ripped through me. I buckled over, stooping to catch a breath. I was wearing a track in the tiled floor, pacing back and forth, back and forth in a vain effort to encourage my baby to come quickly and to try to relieve the terrible pain.
One particular memory stands out vividly. If I close my eyes, I can see it as clearly as if it is happening right now: a woman stands in the doorway of a hospital labour ward room. Our eyes connect briefly before she returns to looking and cooing at the sleeping baby in her arms. Despite the pain, I smiled at the thought that it would soon be my turn to cuddle and coo and love a baby, our very first—a boy named Kaelen. It was pure exhaustion, pushing and pushing, but still Kaelen didn’t want to come. I remember asking my husband to pray that God would help Kaelen to come out right now. I was tired, the epidural was wearing off and the pain was intensifying. Ken bowed his head against mine and asked God for help. What happened next is still too hard to comprehend. I changed position, hoping that it would prompt Kaelen to come. Exhaustion turned to fear when the nurse reattached the CTG machine—Kaelen’s heartbeat could not be found. The labour pain was so horrific that I didn’t even comprehend what that might mean. Nurses rushed me to theatre for an emergency C-section. I gave my consent to being anaesthetised and started counting. I made it to five before I went under. I awoke groggy and confused. The room was crowded. A doctor walked over to where I was lying and said those dreadful words, “Your baby didn’t make it.” My reply to the news was, “God knows best.” To this day, I don’t know where in my soul those words came from. They placed Kaelen in my arms. He was warm. Beautiful. Motionless. We bathed and dressed him, took photos and cuddled him. He “slept” in a cold cot in the room with us. Throughout the night we prayed, pleaded, begged, hoping for a miracle. I listened out for a cry that would tell us that Kaelen was alive, but in the morning our baby remained silent and still and cold. It felt like God had let us down in a gigantic way. That day challenged our belief in a God who is kind, loving and ready to answer our desperate prayers. Where was our miracle? Where did our prayers go? Why did this happen to us? Thus began our journey of grief. It was a slow, painful journey. Choosing the tiny white coffin, the tear-shaped silver urn, the order of the funeral service, closing the door to a nursery full of toys and clothes yet empty of life, recovering from a C-section with nothing to show for it, swallowing the two little pills to stop my breast milk coming in, days of asking God why. The support from our families, friends and church family was amazing and helped us through those dark days. We clung to the promise of the resurrection and our hope in Jesus. Precious Bible verses comforted us, as did prayers for peace and healing. God was there through it all, our source of strength. As I type this, it has been four years and two weeks since that wretched day. Time has flown by swiftly. Today, while there is scarring on our hearts, we can smile and laugh again and the pain has dulled, somewhat. We always remember Kaelen and his birthday. Occasionally we still ask God why. “Why did Kaelen have to die? Why didn’t You answer our prayer?” But no answers are forthcoming. We thought we would have at least two other children to fill the quiet nursery by now. But after nearly four years of trying, praying,
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If I never have another child this side of eternity, I know that God knows best.
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good. God will not withhold from me even one blessing that it would be for my best good for Him to give. So if I never have another child this side of eternity, I know that God knows best. He will strengthen me and soothe my aching heart. He will give me peace and dry my tears each month when nature makes its round and I stare at yet another dying ember of hope. He is my Father. He loves me and cries with me and longs to reveal His plans and purposes. But for whatever reason, He hasn’t. He might not answer my “whys” but He is interested, involved and active in my life though it doesn’t always feel that way and at times I get frustrated with His silence. Maybe my destiny in life is to love other people’s children as I would my own. Maybe this is the only way to guarantee my eternal salvation. Maybe this way, through my testimony, many people can be brought to a saving relationship with Jesus. Or maybe there is no particular reason or purpose and this is just another effect of sin. All I know is that without God this journey would be ten-fold worse, but with Him I can endure emptiness, loss, grief, pain and disappointment. With Him I can smile at the storm and find peace and joy despite our circumstances. I look forward to the second coming when Kaelen will be returned to our arms. When others like me, who missed out on parenthood this side of heaven, will be given their own precious child to love. Don’t give up on God because He will never leave nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5).
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lab testing, doctors visiting and trying some more, we remain inexplicably childless—childless despite the numerous people who have been praying for us. I often wonder what has happened to all those prayers. Why does God seem to turn a deaf ear? Why do those who don’t want children, or who abuse, neglect and mistreat them, seem to pop them out in droves, but those who want them can’t conceive? Why do unbelievers and atheists have their families, but God-fearing Christians languish with empty hands and full hearts with no child to love? And why do some people get their miracle—people whom doctors think will never be able to conceive? Yet people like us, for whom there is no medical reason for their infertility, are still praying, hoping and losing hope, because there seems to be no miracle for them? I remember a recent Mother’s Day clip that was shown in church about a double miracle: the miracle conception and birth of two babies when all hope for even one was gone. The video mentioned thanking God for mums. But what about those women who long to be mums but for whom there is no miracle? There was no assurance about the enduring love of God or the example of God being seen in those would-be mums. It felt like we were forgotten. I know there are many women wearing my shoes. It’s not something we talk about because it’s so heartbreaking and we believe, rightly or wrongly, that people with kids just can’t understand our struggles. But many of us are struggling through our smiles. Usually, when you read an article like this, there is the thrilling news at the end about how God has finally answered prayers and delivered a miracle. But that isn’t so in this case. Our arms are still empty, hope has almost flickered out. Yet we still cling to the tiny flicker that is left, that maybe, just maybe there is a miracle for us. And if there isn’t . . . Then even though hope dwindles, we still have faith. Faith in a God who is merciful, kind, compassionate, loving, gracious and full of wisdom. We know that God knows ultimately what is best and He desires, above all else, our eternal
AT THE AT THE
FEEDING THE HOMELESS
When does raising awareness about a good deed become a shameless brag about one’s generosity? By Vania Chew
OR OUR
E
ver heard of the quote “No good deed goes unpunished”? I heard it for the first time today. It might sound like an oxymoron—why would you punish a good deed? However a colleague informed me that this was an old-fashioned way of saying good deeds are often unappreciated by others. At times, they are even met with downright hostility. I decided I liked the quote—it’s a surprisingly apt description of society today, the era of the iPhone, Facebook and what US comedy writer Harris Wittels describes as the “humble-brag”.
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Harris coined the term to describe “a specific type of bragging which masks the brag in a faux-humble guise. The false humility allows the offender to boast [about] their ‘achievements’ without any sense of shame and guilt.” According to an article in The Independent, the worst humble-brag offenders are usually celebrities who have a lot to brag about, but for the most part, “maintain enough self-awareness not to wantonly show off about the luck that has befallen them”. But “ordinary” people are now causing offence too.
THEODORA AMUIMUIA
egos? A recent post on Facebook generated at least 73,000 reactions and more than 60,000 shares. It wasn’t a cat video, a political meme or even a celebrity selfie. It was a simple black-and-white image emblazoned with the text: “If you want to feed the homeless, then feed the homeless. But the moment you post it on social media, you’re also feeding your ego.” “Is posting your good deeds on social media really about altruism?” asks Alyssa Rachelle, in her article on website MadameNoire. We know that what we post on social media can influence peo-
ple’s perception of us. So if we post our good deeds on the likes of Instagram, Facebook or Snapchat, are we really being unselfish or are we just humble-bragging and looking for brownie points? It’s the latter for actress Lucy Gransbury. “Facebook is full of good-deed-gloating,” complains Lucy in a written contribution to website Mamamia. “Statuses in which people attempt to be subtle, but really are screaming ‘QUICK, EVERYONE, LOOK HOW GENEROUS I WAS TODAY!’ ” Personally, I find it strange we’re so quick to judge people’s motivation for posting good deeds on social media but often turn a blind eye to posts about other things. We don’t accuse people of being self-centred when they change their Facebook status from “Single” to “In a relationship”. We don’t tell people they’re egotistical as we scroll through Snapchat selfies with flower crowns and puppy-dog ears. And we don’t question people’s motivations when they proudly share their graduation photos, job promotions or overseas holiday plans. Instead we rejoice with them, congratulate them and wish we were there. We don’t get angry and frustrated with them (for the most part, anyway). The truth is that we can’t judge people’s motivations for posting what they do. We might draw conclusions from their tone or choice of words, but ultimately, only the person posting can articulate the reasons behind their post. Otherwise we’d have to question the purpose of everything we see posted on social media. And just how do you judge the purpose of a Snapchat selfie? Even if people are promoting good deeds, isn’t it nice to have something positive to look at for a change? The movement #LoveWhatMatters has a following of more than 7 million people on Facebook. According to their website, the movement began with a simple premise: “There are millions of good people who want to celebrate the moments in life that matter. There are plenty of places to go if you want news about crime and violence, celebrity gossip or politicians attacking one another. But where do you go when you want to be inspired? Where do you go when you want to read about foster kids being adopted, military heroes returning to their families, a dad opening a box to learn he’s now a grandfather or a first wedding dance that doctors thought would never happen? These are the things that matter, and we celebrate them every day.” LoveWhatMatters.com frequently highlights the good deeds people do in everyday life, whether it’s leaving an enormous tip for a financially-strapped server or a shout-out to someone who helped carry their groceries. People commenting on the site's posts say that reading about these acts of kindness restores their faith in humanity and gives them hope for the future. In this case, posting good deeds on social media has nothing to do with ego and everything to do with spreading moments of light in a darkening world. Not only that, but the humble-brag has the potential to not only raise awareness of good deeds but inspire others to contribute too. According to care2.com, GoodyGood is a mobile app that was specifically built for users to share their good deeds in the hope they could inspire others to do good deeds too. The genius behind the app was eight-year-old Nyla who believes that “a little seed grows into a big tree” and that “little random acts
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29
GET
But let’s make one thing clear: doing good deeds does not make you a good person.
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WHAT'S ON OUR SHOW THIS MONTH?
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January 2018
•
Should grandparents be able to invoice for child care? Wealth mentor Marion Mays discusses budgeting for mums. ATTANAN726—ISTOCK
•
7–13 JANUARY • •
At what age should kids start dating? “Yes Day”: what is it and would you have it?
14–20 JANUARY • •
Nutritionist Trish Guy talks about babies and sugar. What is appropriate advertising in public areas?
21–27 JANUARY • •
Why this mum stopped worrying. Would you read your child’s diary?
28 JANUARY–3 FEBRUARY • • SONERCDEM—ISTOCK
trade, spoke frankly about the importance of improving prison conditions and established various nightly shelters for the homeless in London. In 1818, Elizabeth gave evidence to a House of Commons committee about the horrific condition of British prisons and became the first woman to ever present evidence in Parliament. But she was not content to simply leave the issues to Parliament to sort out. She began doing tours around the continent, talking about the work she was doing and promoting the importance of welfare change and humanitarianism. Her tours inspired the King of Prussia to personally visit Newgate Prison and see the changes there for himself. Queen Victoria was also impressed by Elizabeth’s humanitarian work and contributed financially to her causes. When Elizabeth died of a stroke in 1845, the seamen of the Ramsgate Coast Guard chose to fly their flag at half mast as a sign of respect for her; a practice that until this occasion was officially reserved for the death of a ruling monarch. Elizabeth had no hesitations about bringing publicity to the causes she was supporting because she knew that this was the way to raise awareness of the causes and get other people on board. But let’s make one thing clear: doing good deeds does not make you a good person. In the Bible, the prophet Isaiah acknowledges this, telling us that our feeble attempts to earn brownie points with God are worthless: “Your righteousness is like filthy rags” (Isaiah 64:6). Fortunately, God can see what’s in our hearts and read our intentions. In the end, it’s not what we do (or don’t do) but what we intend that matters. And maybe that’s what the social media critics want us to remember.
Did you know we have a Facebook community where you can join in the conversation on our show segments, magazine articles and much more? Recently, we asked our members: HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT C-SECTIONS?
31 DECEMBER–6 JANUARY of kindness can change the world”. Nyla approached her parents with the concept of creating an app where people could record good deeds and words of kindness and hopefully inspire us. Her mum worked for a software company and her dad was a marketing strategy consultant and they were more than happy to help her create the app. Although the app is no longer in the App Store, it proved very popular while it was available. Some people used it to share simple acts of kindness such as paying for the order of the car behind them in a drive-through or offering their seat to someone on the train. Others shared good deeds they had helped family and friends with, and still others shared what they had done for the community, such as donating clothes to second-hand stores or donating time for a school reading project. It was a great community for people wanting to help make the world a better place and inspire others in the meantime. As a child, I loved reading all kinds of books (and still have the collection to prove it). But I’ve always had a special fondness for real-life biographies: inspiring true stories about people who made a positive difference in either local or overseas communities. One of my childhood heroes was Elizabeth Fry, an English philanthropist and social reformer who was born in 1780. At the prompting of a family friend, Elizabeth first visited Newgate Prison in 1813 and was deeply horrified by the living conditions of the female prisoners and their children. She came back the next day with food and clothes for the women and eventually funded a prison school for the children. Elizabeth also taught the female prisoners at Newgate Prison how to sew, read and earn money for themselves. She campaigned heavily for the abolition of the slave
social
Are libraries still relevant in a digital age? Going on holidays without your kids.
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Content accurate at the time of printing but may be subject to change.
Nadine: I've had three and did not enjoy any of them. But I'm certainly grateful that I live in a time when c-sects are an option. Erin: Healthy mummy and healthy baby—that’s what’s most important. Miranda: One natural and two c-sections for me. After the pain and damage caused by number one and the risk to my life and bubba, I am so glad that c-sections were available for bubbas two and three. The joys of having big babies.
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HIGH SCHOOL
PRIMARY
PRESCHOOL
BOOK CORNER
32
GARY
Leila Rudge Walker Books $24.99
WIN
So popular this is its second reprint, Gary is a simple tale about a racing pigeon who cannot fly. Gary’s adventures teach children about maps, scrapbooks and most importantly, how by daring to dream we can all rise above our limitations and inspire others.
SHARKPEDIA (SECOND EDITION) DK $24.99
A visually interesting and comprehensive research manual and guide for the shark-loving child. From the huge and harmless whale shark to the puny pygmy shark, this guide will take kids from a tropical paradise to the cold, dark depths of the ocean.
THE WOLF, THE DUCK AND THE MOUSE
THE ABC BOOK OF FEELINGS Helen Martin, Judith Simpson & Cheryl Orsini HarperCollins Children’s Books $24.99
Mac Barnett & Jon Klassen Walker Books $24.99
“I may have been swallowed, but I have no intention of being eaten.” Featuring classic crayon and colour pencil illustrations, this is a hilarious tale of how a duck and a mouse found a home in a wolf’s stomach and why the wolf howls at the moon. Parents familiar with fairy tales and fables will enjoy reading this book to their children.
LIFE OF THE PARTY! THE SUSIE K FILES 1 Allen & Unwin $9.99
Laid out more like a comic book, The Susie K Files is a fun—and funny—series about an introverted child’s hilarious attempts to meet her mother’s high expectations. There will be many a child who will identify with Susie K, intelligent and loved, but who doesn’t just quite fit in with the crowd.
WIN
Excited, sad, disgusted, glad . . . through the book, children not only learn about the variety of feelings we can experience, but also how to cope with them. A great resource for young children just learning why different circumstances make them feel a certain way, and how best to verbalise that feeling.
THE SLIME BOOK DK $14.99
Did you know there’s more than one way to make slime (or that there’s even one)—and that they come in edible versions too? Cheap, easy and pretty recipes to keep your child entertained; they won’t even know they’re learning the “science bits” littered through the pages!
MY SWEET ORANGE TREE
SAVING MARTY
LIBBY IN THE MIDDLE
Translated into English for the first time, this international bestseller tells the story of a precocious young boy who strikes up an unlikely friendship with a man who steps in to be the loving father he needed. Bittersweet and full of heart, it’s hardly surprising this book has never been out of print in Brazil since it was first published in 1968.
Incredibly moving and warm. A story about an ordinary boy and a pig who thinks he’s a dog. A touching tale of friendship bonds between humans and animals. Well worth a read, but be aware there are themes of depression and suicide.
Filled with enough intrigue to make you keep turning the page, Libby in the Middle is a simple and heart-warming story. A tale of a middle child at the curious and awkward stage of not-quitea-teen, and a family coming to terms with secrets from years past.
José Mauro de Vasconcelos Pushkin Press $18.99
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January 2018
Paul Griffin The Text Publishing Company $16.99
WIN
Gwyneth Rees Bloomsbury Publishing $12.99
WIN
THE UGLY FIVE
Julia Donaldson & Axel Scheffler Scholastic $24.99
WIN
The wildebeest, warthog, hyena, vulture and stock are safari animals that are often ignored, overshadowed by the majestic lion, leopard and elephant. The Ugly Five celebrates their “ugliness” and teaches the lesson that nothing is truly detestable or useless.
A IS FOR AUSTRALIA Frané Lessac Walker Books $17.99
Learn the alphabet and explore Australia with this wonderful A–Z book. From Bondi (NSW) to Kakadu (NT), your child will be transported to all the different and amazing places in this country. Filled with informational tidbits and cute illustrations.
WIN THESE ! ! S K O BO HOW T U O D FIN E 26 ON PAG January 2018
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33
By Chelsea Stanley
I
heard his cry through the monitor. Seriously? I thought. Three straight nights of post-bedtime tears. I was so over it. Walking up the stairs, I devised a scheme to get me out of his room as quickly as possible. But as my feet hit the hallway leading into his bedroom, I felt God’s gentle nudge. Slow down. He needs lullabies of grace tonight. How does God calm and quiet our souls? Like a mother. “But I have calmed and quieted myself, I am like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child I am content” (Psalm 131:2). I took a deep breath of faith, and for the next 40 minutes, I sang my scared little boy to sleep. My lullabies calmed and quieted his four-year-old soul. Most of us have witnessed, in some way, the soul-calming effect of a mother’s presence on her child. There is safety with a mother, just as there is safety in the Father’s arms. The child hears peace in her voice, just as the sheep hear peace in the Good Shepherd’s. When a child is hurt or scared or sick, he calls for his mother. He trusts her completely. If the mother he trusts teaches him that there is One in whom his soul can trust even more, then hopefully, one day, he will cry out for Jesus instead.
SOURCE: DESIRINGGOD.ORG
FINISHED WITH THIS MAGAZINE? PASS IT ON TO YOUR FRIENDS! 34
BEST LIFE 13
SECRETS TO A
HEALTHIER YOU
From the latest superfoods to the perfect workout, juice cleanses to gym classes - everyone has an opinion. Being healthy doesn’t have to be so hard. In this free series on health, you’ll receive expert advice to give you an overview of the essentials of good health. Get practical tips to help you feel good right now and set up positive habits your future self will thank you for! Visit hopeoffer.com/health to begin this free series online, or return this form by mail to receive your first booklet.
RAMABOIN—ISTOCK
weary mum
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God’s good purpose for mothers goes beyond feedings and nappies and taxi services. He designed you, dear mother, to be your child’s first glimpse of His comforting love for us. No-one is better suited for this job than you. What a privilege, then, for you to put God’s soul-soothing character on display for your children. In the message “Join Me in Soul-Satisfaction in God” on desiringGod.org, founder John Piper says, “Psalm 131 is about a kind of contentment, or stillness, or quietness of soul, that is rooted not in circumstances, but in God—a God who never changes in His utter commitment to us in Christ.” If we desire for our children’s souls to be rooted in God as he describes, then we as mothers have the great responsibility of providing a climate that is prime for growth. Root systems thrive in rich soil and sunlight. With ideal conditions early on, roots are able to absorb water and nutrients that eventually help the plant thrive in less than desirable circumstances. The monsters and thunderstorms that induce fear in our children’s hearts right now will turn one day into real-life demons and tempests. We can begin the good work of preparing their souls for battle today. When our children come to us afraid or anxious, we have the God-ordained privilege of offering them rich soil and sunshine. Our hugs, snuggles, words and lullabies are life-giving minerals to their souls. How do we nourish our children? We offer them steadfast love and faithfulness. We bear with them, forgive them, show them kindness, listen to them and offer them words of encouragement and life by sharing the good news of Jesus Christ on a daily basis. Drench your child in God’s Word. Shine light into his darkness. Sing him to sleep. Take your child by the hand and lead him to streams of water so that God can plant his roots down deep and allow him to bear good fruit in the coming seasons. Motherhood is exhausting. It requires all of our energy—both mental and physical—and at the end of the day, it’s not uncommon to feel like we’re doing it all in vain. At times, it feels like you’re giving up your life for your child. If it does, be encouraged that you’re probably doing it right. “This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our [children]” (1 John 3:16). Today, take the time to kiss the boo-boos, wipe the tears and sing lullabies of grace. Let your children rest in the comfort of your presence now so that they learn to rest in Jesus soon.
LIVING WELL
SEND THIS FORM TO : Community Manager Hope Channel Locked Bag 1115 Wahroonga NSW 2076