MemoryBright Gift Book - 40th Anniversary by MemoryBright

DERROWS

The romantic story of Wendy and Marty Derrow in honor of their 40th anniversary

Cover Photo

OHI O STATE , 1 969

“This was in the commons in the dorm. I set the timer on my camera and put it on the table. That’s how we did a selfie back then. I was a 19-year-old freshman; Wendy was a 20-year-old sophomore. We’ve always had this photo on display in our house. I love how purely happy we look together.” —M A RT Y

CONTENTS

The Beginning

Our Love Story

Two very different childhoods in Ohio headed to one shared future. Marty and Wendy met at summer camp, fell in love in high school, and wanted start their lives together.

Parenthood

Daughters Michelle and Amy opened an exciting new chapter.

Our Adventures

The Derrow family explored this vast country, while Marty and Wendy explored the world.

152

Careers

162

Next Generation

The principled doctor and the mentalhealth counselor inspired their daughters to pursue exceptional paths. Marty and Wendy saw additions to their family with the weddings of Michelle and Amy, then the baby boom.

230

40 Years and Counting

240

What Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve Learned

There is so much to be grateful for as life together exceeded their dreams from the school sweetheart days. The lessons that mean the most.

INTRODUCTION

40 Years of Happiness FROM PUPPY LOVE TO GR AND ROM ANCE , FOUR DEC ADE S OF JOYFUL TOGE THERNE SS

Marty and Wendy share a photo-booth embrace circa 1968. Left: Celebrating Wendy’s 60th in 2010.

To spend time with Wendy and Marty is to quickly learn that they are one of those couples: The kind who finish each other’s sentences. Who call each other pet names (“Mart” and “Wen” among many others, not all printable here). Who always say “I love you” before hanging up the phone and hold hands at the movies. Who are never far from each other’s side. In short: They are the kind of couple every other couple aspires to be. Theirs is a romance so rare and true that it only deepens with time. Barely teenagers when they met, they knew quickly, and unequivocally, that in each other they had found The One. Not everyone was pleased by the certainty of their young love, nor the determination with which they set about building their lives together. But even as kids, Marty and Wendy knew. They just knew. And remarkably, they documented much of their blossoming relationship—they were taking selfies decades before the term was coined!—in photos, hand-written notes and even the occasional telegram. Collected in these pages, each word, every picture, tells the story of their love affair, from Marty’s poem about “loving thee” to Wendy’s affection for her “Banana.” The self-described “shy, nerdy” Marty had fallen for the vivacious, empathetic Wendy, and neither of them would ever be the same. As the years passed, puppy love evolved into lifelong commitment: marriage and parenthood. The early years weren’t always easy, as the young couple worked to launch Marty’s medical career while also launching their own family. Money was tight, and Marty often worked two jobs while Wendy took the reins as a solo parent. But there was never a shortage of love or a question of commitment. There was always Wendy

and Marty, the unified team, the inseparable duo, the like-minded lovers. Raising their daughters, Michelle and Amy, deepened their bond in profound ways, as the family of four faced the world together, first in Ohio and then in Florida. From family vacations (Who could forget Yosemite?) to driving lessons (Why can’t we forget?) to joyous bat mitzvahs, the focus was always on building a strong family foundation. Naturally, both daughters left the nest—Michelle to New York, Amy to medical school—but Marty and Wendy had sent them off with compasses, and each found her way back home. Like most worthwhile journeys, theirs has been filled with new beginnings and surprising turns. When her daughters were grown, Wendy returned to college to earn her master’s degree and kick off a second career as a mental health counselor. Marty tapped his inner athlete and became a dedicated road warrior. Both found a passion for travel that has led them around the globe, with Marty’s camera capturing each adventure. Whether whale-watching in Alaska or wine-sipping in France, the couple has always taken the most pleasure in simply enjoying each other’s company. Now as grandparents, they model that joy for all those around them, with Grandma and Grandpa showing the youngsters about the importance of mutual respect, kindness and true partnership. (Not to mention the value of PDA!) It’s all here, along with personal stories as only Marty and Wendy can tell them. Yes, they are one of those couples. Theirs is a romance for the ages, and one that continues to grow each day. In Hebrew, it is known as “beshert.” In English, “meant to be.” In any language, true love.

Martin Harold Derrow at age 9

THE BEGINNING Two very different childhoods headed toward one shared future

Wendy Ellen Wandler, at age 8

MARTY ’S PARENTS

Muriel Derrow

David Derrow

BORN: November 7, 1923 BACKGROUND:

BORN: October 5, 1923 BACKGROUND: E ntrepreneur, CEO

Stay-at-home mother

THE BEGINNING

A Quiet Start for Shy Marty P E N S I V E A N D S E R I O U S , T H E S E C O N D O F F I V E C H I L D R E N C A R V E D O U T H I S O W N P AT H

Martin Harold Derrow BORN: February 6, 1951 PLACE: New York City

I was born in New York because that’s where my birth certificate says I was born. I had originally come to Shanks Village, a housing project for veterans near New York City. But my earliest memories were of growing up in Fair Lawn, New Jersey, which was just one of those little suburban places in New Jersey. I was the second of five children: four boys and a girl. My older brother, Chuck, was very athletically gifted and very out there. I was very shy, introverted and had no athletic ability. I was smaller and slight and used to read tons of science fiction. When I was 12, my father, who had worked for my mother’s family’s business, Bernstein Brothers, decided it was time for him to do his own thing. So he found this company that was on the skids in Ohio called Ohio Transmission. He bought it with one of his coworkers, Phil Carstens, and then moved us to Columbus, Ohio, when I was twelve. That was in 1963, the same year that JFK was assassinated. In ninth grade, I started getting into debating and I then I got interested in the theater, so I did that when I was in high school. I tried to help at my father’s business. To be honest, I was so shy and so socially awkward, I was very uncomfortable with strangers and meeting people and trying to sell myself. The company was about sales as much as anything. You had to sell stuff. You had to get in the front and sell stuff, you had to cold call people, you had to go to their businesses and sell your goods. That’s what it was. They sold stuff and they serviced it. I just looked at that and thought, “That’s not me.” I just didn’t think I could be that person. It was very uncomfortable. I didn’t go into it. Chuck didn’t

go into it. My sister Sandy didn’t, my younger brother Andy didn’t. The last brother, Phil, did it and has been tremendously successful. I think my parents were good parents for the most part. My father, I would say, did with me what I tried to do with my children, which was to simply let them know that I love them and that I expected them to always do their best in anything that they did and then kind of left it at that. I was never harassed about schoolwork or anything, but I think I had a work ethic and I think a certain moral ethic about life that I’ve carried with me. We traveled a little bit with him. I think my father always tried very hard. My mother was a little bit of a difficult person. My father, I think, tried hard to connect. When he got home from work after long hours, he always came in with a smile, he always came in to greet everybody. I think he really did try. He tried to connect with me. We had become estranged by the time I was in college, but he reached out to me a number of times and unfortunately it really just never worked out after a while. Life is like that sometimes. When I was a kid, my grandparents had a five-anddime in Maywood, New Jersey. That’s where my father had worked when he was a kid. My grandparents had emigrated from the Ukraine by way of Argentina with almost nothing. They made enough money with the shop and buying real estate in the Maywood area that he retired when he was in his late fifties. They bought a place in the Catskills and then in Miami. They eventually just moved to Florida. I was about 14 when I met Wendy. We were aware of each other. We weren’t dating or anything. In high

THE VACATIONS

My parents took us on the classic family vacations. We went to Washington, D.C., to see all the monuments. We went to Florida, which was my first look at the sunny life there. We went to California. I think we were in L.A. for a while and then drove up and went to Yosemite and Sequoia. That was the same trip, to some degree, that I tried to do with our kids because I have fond memories of my own family vacations.

On a trip in the American West, the Derrow family visited Yosemite. From left: David, Andy, Philip, Muriel and Sandy.

THE SELF-STARTER

THE BAR MITZVAH

I was 13. It was fine. It’s the worst time of these kids’ lives. They’ve got braces on, they’re going through puberty. Their hormones are raging, their school is getting harder and harder. And then in the middle of this, we tell them, “Yeah, you’re going to have to learn a Torah portion. You’re going to have to do it by heart in front of a bunch of people.” Then you’re supposed to just watch the poor kid freak out. From what I learned, you just tell that young 13-year-old, “You can do it. I did it, you’ll do it, everybody does it. You’ll survive, you’re smart.” Nothing crazy happened at my bar mitzvah. It was just an ordinary bar mitzvah. It was really fine. I survived.

Marty, age 13

Marty with little brothers Andy and Philip

The camp counselor

Chuck and Marty

school we were in the same Spanish class even though Wendy was a year ahead. In high school, in different classes, you have a mix of ages. We had Spanish class together, I remember that and I think that was maybe the only class we had together and then we knew each other through the theater as well. I enjoyed the theater stuff. I enjoyed academics. I did well in high school. Theater was a way to get out of your comfort zone and I found that liberat-

ing because it wasn’t real. I had fun with it. I don’t even know if I was OK, but it was something that I enjoyed. I got the parts and I had fun. It was a worthwhile thing. I think I liked being somebody else. Late in life I’ve had a chance to reconnect with at least a couple of my brothers. It’s not healthy when people are estranged but it was good to get back together again, to see Chuck late in life going through some very difficult times. It’s been very meaningful

for me. Philip and I, we have developed a cordial relationship. It’s never going to be the same. I’ll never be a part of that inner circle with them. They’re all very tight together. You try to keep your doors open, you try to keep your options open and never say never. Even seeing my dad again, it was meaningful to me, probably to him as well. At the end of the day, we’re all getting older, if we’re lucky. —MARTY

Circa 1927, David Derrowâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s family, with mother Juncia and father Eli.

Circa 1978, David Derrowâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s family. Top row from left: Son Philip, daughter Sandy, son Chuck and wife Sherry, brother Alfie and wife Joyce, son Marty and wife Wendy, niece Paula, son Andy. Bottom row, from left: niece Cindy, father Eli, grandson Sol, mother Juncia, David, grandson Avi, wife Muriel, granddaughter Amy, granddaughter Michelle, mother-in-law Eva.

WENDY â&#x20AC;&#x2122;S PARENTS

Victor Wandler

Leah Greenstein

BORN: September 19, 1910 BACKGROUND: Air Force,

BORN: February 27, 1918 BACKGROUND: Bookkeeper

then store owner

at the local synagogue

THE BEGINNING

Little Wendy Brings New Joy T H E O U T G O I N G G I R L W A S V E R Y L O V E D I N A B I G E X T E N D E D FA M I LY

Wendy Ellen Wandler BORN: July 28, 1950 PLACE: Columbus, Ohio

My mother’s parents settled in Columbus. They were all born there, the seven children in her family. Her whole family was born there. My mother was born, lived and died within ten miles of the same radius. My father was in the service and he was stationed in Columbus at Wright Patterson Air Force Base. That’s when he met my mother. They met and got married within a few months of meeting one another. He was seven years older. They had a wonderful marriage, and they really loved one another very much. It was a good marriage. My dad snored so they had to each have a bedroom. The house was tiny. There was the living room and then on the other side of a wall was the kitchen and to the left was the bathroom and then my dad’s bedroom and my mom’s bedroom. That was the whole house. He slept on a single bed. He was a big man, and he was relegated to sleep in a little tiny bedroom. Then finally, they decided to get him a double bed. It wasn’t a king size. It was a standard double, which barely fit into the room. They put it in so that basically it was against the wall on one side and then there was barely enough room to walk between the side of the bed and the dresser that they had there. He would just lie there like he was King Midas. He was hanging over it. He was so happy. I was born in Columbus at Grant Hospital, the same hospital as Michelle. The same doctor delivered me who delivered Michelle and Amy. Growing up in Columbus, I was always very close to my parents, always very close. I was very close to my extended family too. I had aunts and uncles and my grandmother, Rebecca, who Michelle is named after. I lived next

door to her until second grade. My mother worked outside the home, as a bookkeeper at the synagogue, so my grandmother would watch me during the day. She was kind of a dour old woman, but she was harmless. My aunt Zelda and my aunt Faye were very loving towards me. My aunt Faye I was very close to. My aunt Tillie lived in Cincinnati. My father, I adored, I absolutely adored. He was not well a good bit of his life, and I worried about him a lot. My mother worried about him. And we worried about my brother, Alan, a lot. He became sick when my mother was pregnant with me. I felt very loved as a child, but I remember being scared a lot of times as a child because someone was always sick or someone was in the hospital or something was about to happen. From second grade on, I was home alone with my brother after school. When he was living at home, he would get sick after school and I was in charge. Alan would have seizures, and I would have to handle them. He’s six years older than me. We would have handymen at the house and they would freak out and I’d say, it’s OK, this is what you do. My brother would have anger issues. My father would wrestle him to the floor. I’d go to day camp and I’d get a call; your father’s in the hospital, so you have to leave. I grew up before I needed to. I also became very good at reading the temperature in the room. I think I was destined to become a therapist. I think subconsciously I’m good at that. My childhood was kind of a dichotomy. A part of it was really wonderful. We also took trips. My father’s family lived in New York, so I have fabulous memories of going to New York and going to Broadway shows and

The Greenstein family in Columbus, circa 1925. From left: Faye, Sarah, Rebecca, Pat, Leah, Tillie, Harry, Zelda, Ted.

all that kind of thing. My father had two brothers in New York City and a sister in California. His family was funny. They were a fun group. But I also had some very emotional memories of my childhood. My weight was always an issue and there were mixed-up things about that, but by and large, through everything, it was a good childhood. My teenage years were really great because I met Marty and that was wonderful. I was very active in high school, had a lot of friends. I was active in a lot of different things. I was a majorette. I did very well academically. I was in the top, I think, sixteen or so. It

was a big class. That was good after a lot of hard work. Of the seven children in my mother’s family, five stayed in Columbus. Only two left, Uncle Pat and Aunt Tillie. So when I was growing up, I had this extended family, with so many aunts, uncles and cousins so very close by. It was like an Italian family. It was a very active, somewhat dysfunctional, Jewish family with lots of activity, some of it good, some of it not so good. They adored Marty, loved Marty. He got to know all the relatives. They all had a chance to know him. My grandmother Rebecca had just died when we started dating. It hadn’t been very long, it had been a

year or so since she had passed away. Marty never met her but I used to tell him about her. Once we were dating pretty seriously, we would always get a good laugh being with my family. It was colorful, very colorful. My mother and Aunt Faye were like twins. They were not just sisters. This was at a time when people didn’t have cellphones but my mom would get home from work—she worked at the Jewish Community Center—and she would pick up the phone and she would spend three hours on the phone. Non-stop. She would hold the chord, walking around talking to Faye about everything, repeating pretty much every word

The Wandler family in Columbus, circa 1949.

that was said to her during the day and who said what, Kaplan, who was a Jewish guy, worked with Alan. He what they did, what complexion they had. She would was a bit of an entrepreneur and he was a physician, either be pausing, “Uh-huh, mm-hmm,” while Faye a family doctor. Dr. Kaplan was on the board of one of would be responding, and then she’d carry on. It was the psychiatric hospitals where Alan was brought in amazing, day after day. When Faye died, for my mom, once. The story is that Dr. Kaplan told my parents that that kind of took some wind went out of her sails. Alan didn’t need to be there, that there was a better Parts of my childhood were very rough. I went to place for him. He had a nursing home that was filled all these nursing homes with my parents because my with, I think, veterans, old veterans. I think a lot of brother couldn’t be at home sometimes. I’d see these them were sick. A lot of them I think were alcoholic people in these homes, they had Kleenex in their ear and they basically didn’t know what to do with Alan and they’d walk around shuffling and vacant. so they just drugged him, sedated him to the point of Alan spent 20 years in an old-age home. A Dr. being inarticulate, fumbling around and drooling and

barely able to express himself with heavy, heavy doses of drugs. He spent the better part of his life, 20 years maybe in that state. Marty and I used to pick him up and take him out. Probably the most important contribution that Marty made to anybody’s life in my family was working so hard to get Alan into a new place for younger people with disabilities, called Shalom House. It was just being built. Marty was the medical director of Heritage House, which was affiliated with Shalom House. Alan got in and he had a second life basically. They took him off all the drugs, fixed up his anticon-

Mother and daughter

Playing with Alan on a beach outing.

Alan and Wendy

With Grandma Rebecca

With Mom and Dad

Baby Wendy with Leah

Wendy and her beloved dad

Little Alan

Sister and brother

An early ride, on a pony in a neighborhood alley.

“ By and large,

through everything, it was a good childhood. It set me on a path in my life that has been very fulfilling.” —WENDY

vulsants and he woke up. He is disabled, but he has a life now that he makes the most of. That was the story of that. He’s content now. He’s finally aged into where he’s living. When he was in his 20s, he was living in a nursing home. Obviously it made no sense but there was no place for him. My dad had a little store. This is where all those charms came from that I’ve given to the grandkids. He ran that store for a while. I remember where it was. It was near the JCC. I think there were a lot of things in the store. He wasn’t a pharmacist, but it was that kind of a store. He did that for a while. Later he went to work for Butch Levy, who had an auto parts store called Nationwide. My dad worked there for about the next 20 years. He died when he was 69. His quality of life and that of my brother’s would have been very different if we had lived in a more modern era. My mother lived into her 90s. Throughout everything, Marty was very responsible. I felt like he could take care of business. Whereas growing up, there was no one to take care of business. People were taking care of my brother. I never quite knew when the rug was going to get pulled out. With Marty, I’ve always felt completely safe. —WENDY

A young Vic after his time in the military.

The young couple in Columbus.

“

Vic was a dear man, a wonderful man with so much potential. We became very close.” —MARTY

Vic working at a local store in Columbus.

A young Alan.

Leah with her siblings and extended family.

“ I was always very

close to my parents, always very close. I absolutely adored my father .” —WENDY

Outside Radio City on a trip to New York City. A teenage Alan. 24

Alanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bar mitzvah.

The Wandler family in the 1960s.

A happy night with Wendy and parents.

The stellar high school student. 25

OUR LOVE STORY

They met at summer camp, fell hard for each other in high school and could barely wait to start their lives together

High school sweethearts: Eastmoor High School junior Marty was elated to pick up Wendy for her senior prom in 1968.

OUR LOVE STORY

How We Met S UM M ER LOV IN ’: A F TER M EE TIN G AT A C O LUM B US DAY C A M P, YO U N G LOV E B EG A N B U R NIN G B RIG HT IN HIG H S C H O O L

WENDY: We met at summer camp when we were about 14. That was my second summer working at Camp COJACEE in Columbus. The name was short for Columbus Jewish Center. Both of us were counselors in training, CITs. We both had friends there at the camp. MARTY: We didn’t really know each other. Wendy had

more friends than I did, which has been true pretty much through our life. Right, we didn’t know each other. In fact, there was another boy there. I don’t remember his first name. He was cute. So, Marty was there. He was nice but we had friends, and it was like, “Oh, yeah, he’s there.” It’s not that we were dating. I remember thinking he was cute.

WENDY:

We met each other through just working there. In 10th grade, I entered the same high school as Wendy, Eastmoor. I already knew her from the summer, and we might’ve gone out a little bit. I just remember her as being very cute. She had a dynamite figure, and she had a great smile. She talked to me. I was very self-conscious around girls. I mean, totally. Wendy engaged with me. MARTY:

“ He was cute.

I would always be drawn to p eople who were a little quieter.”

—WENDY

WENDY: Why wouldn’t I talk to him? I always tended

to talk to people who were a little shy. You know, it’s like the outgoing people took care of themselves so I would always be drawn to people maybe who were a little quieter. Marty was quieter. He wasn’t this effervescent personality.

MARTY: No, and I’m still not. Never been effervescent. I was socially kind of inept. WENDY: We did have a double date. That to me was our

first date. We went to Emil’s. That was a restaurant; they had pickles, they had big doughnuts and everything, crullers. We sat there, and I remember looking at Marty and thinking, “I like this guy.” That was the first time that I looked at you as someone like, there’s a little spark there. Then, it became something like, “I hope he calls me. I hope I see him again. I hope we can get together.” MARTY: I think things got rolling when I got to East-

moor. We were in Spanish and a couple of classes. I got into the theater productions immediately. Then I ran into Wendy there. She was working on the crew there. She was doing makeup, set design. WENDY: Sound effects, yes. I was behind the scenes. MARTY: Pretty quickly, we started going out. The first

play I was in was Blithe Spirit. I remember Wendy worked on that one. The one I remember the most was Bye Bye Birdie. It was the biggest production. WENDY: I think one of our first significant dates was

Young sweethearts Wendy and Marty at a Cedar Point photo booth.

on New Year’s Eve. We went to see the movie Wait Until Dark. It was a thriller with Audrey Hepburn and Alan Arkin. We both loved the movies. Then, it really started to get serious. Eventually we were going steady and I was wearing Marty’s ring.

“I was very self-

conscious around girls. I mean, totally. Wendy engaged with me.” —MARTY

Marty (third from top right) and the gang of counselors at USY camp.

Wendy oversees a pack of day campers.

THE CAMP

At Camp COJACEE where Wendy and I met, the counselors and the counselors-in-trainings would put together our own activities for after we were done with camp. We had some sleepovers that we had to be there for the kids, but then besides that, we did our own thing. We went on outings. I can’t remember all we did together, but I think we went to Old Man’s Cave on one occasion. That was a place that we used to take our kids also. We sort of knew each other through some social things, but we weren’t dating. Well, at least not yet. —MARTY

Marty commands the starring role in Barefoot in the Park.

“

Acting in the school plays was a really liberating experience. I was still shy in real life, but not when I got to play a part onstage.” —MARTY

OUR LOVE STORY

The High School Years W E N D Y D A Z Z L E D A S A M A J O R E T T E W H I L E M A R T Y S T O L E T H E S P O T L I G H T O N S TA G E

Wendy dances with the Eastmoor majorettes.

“

I loved being active at school, being around people. Maybe I craved all that activity after growing up around so many colorful relatives.” —WENDY

Love notes, passed in class at Eastmoor High School.

Marty and Wendy.

Visiting Grandma Juncia and Grandpa Eli

Alan and Marty

At the state fair

Summer fun

“

Marty was so kind, so smart. He was good with my brother. He was such a joy to be with. All of that was part of falling in love with him.” —WENDY

Wendy with the Derrows

At Old Man’s Cave.

Ready for a big date

Goofing around with friends

At the beach

Wendy’s high school graduation

“

Wendy had such a radiance about her. You can see it in that smile. Even when I wasn’t with her, I pictured that smile always.” —MARTY

The couple stayed in contact any way they could.

DOGPATCH DANCE

Wendy invited Marty to this girl-asks-the-boy dance with a hillbilly theme inspired by Liâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;l Abner.

THE PROM

Marty left a special message on the back of this photo from Wendyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s senior prom.

OUR LOVE STORY

The College Years L O N G - D I S TA N C E R O M A N C E ? N O T F O R T H E S E T W O , S O W E N D Y M A D E A B O L D C H O I C E

Wendy and Marty bundle up at an Ohio State football game.

WENDY: After I graduated high school, I was all set to go

to Miami University in Oxford, Ohio. I went to orientation in early summer. But then I thought, “I can’t leave Marty.” Miami University was far away from Columbus. I told my parents, “I’ve got to go to Ohio State and stay in the same city.” I’m sure my dad was not pleased. But he didn’t say anything and they let me go ahead enroll at Ohio State, which I did. MARTY: It was amazing you could make these decisions

like that, and it was going to be fine. You just got in. I

finished up my high school year. Wendy lived at home freshman year and took the bus back and forth to school. WENDY: Then things really heated up.

There were armored tanks going down the streets at night. One night, Marty came over to be with my three roommates to stay with us because it was scary. We were together through that.

MARTY: The year I went to start at Ohio State, I lived on

MARTY: I remember Wendy took all these liberal arts

campus. I was ready to get out of the house. Wendy also moved to campus then. We were an adjacent buildings. We were both in the north dorms. It was the year of the Vietnam riots, Kent State shootings nearby and so, we were together much of that year.

courses, teaching courses, and art appreciation courses. I was with her for a lot of that. She had to make things. I used to go with her to the art museum, and she had to go through the art museum and take notes about paintings. We just would hang out together. Soon we said, “We’re

WENDY:

The couple both lived on campus starting in Martyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s freshman year.

“We were talking about

getting married, having kids. But I didn’t know what I was going to do for a career.” —MARTY MARTY: I had to sort it out. I can’t say that I had this

Wendy sports her Ohio State colors.

calling. I went there thinking I was going to go into law. I was thinking that. I had no experience aside from being on the debate team. But my sort of immature view of law school was being buried in books and having to memorize enormous volumes of case law. It just seemed dry and boring, like I wouldn’t be good at it. I kind of started veering away from that, and my brother Chuck was already pre-med. He was up at Michigan. He was, at that time, two years ahead of me. Of course, I had an uncle who was a doctor. I knew there was this doctor thing out there. At the end of that freshman year, I decided on medicine. The problem was, for pre-med, you really had to cram in all the required courses because you have to take the MCATs. You have to get in all these science courses: zoology, biology, organic chemistry, all the chem courses, the math courses, right through calculus. I hadn’t taken any of it. I had done the more liberal arts stuff. I had to going to get married.” We were talking about having get in all of that. I had to get going. kids, the whole deal. But I didn’t know what I was goI bumped up my course load and started ripping ing to do for a career; I had nothing lined up. into those courses in my sophomore year, and I managed to get through all of it. I took my MCATs before I WENDY: He wanted to be an attorney maybe. And I finished all the required courses. I still did well on the always knew that I wanted to be a teacher. I thought MCATs even though I hadn’t taken some of the material. about going into special ed. But I had to get done in Then they offered early enrollment at Ohio State’s med four years. I actually got done a semester early, with school. If you could make the grade, you could apply no master’s degree at that time because I had to work and skip your senior year of college. You had to take once Marty decided that he wanted to go on to medi- an extra course load as an undergrad but then if you cal school there. could fit those requirements, had the right GPA, did

well enough on your MCATs, then you could start med school after your junior year. I applied, and at that point, we were already scheduled to be married. Our wedding was scheduled for December 19, 1971, during the holiday break of classes. The wedding was scheduled and we were going to do it. We had our honeymoon scheduled. I was notified by the med school that I had been admitted to the early admissions program, and they did that right before we got married. They made a point of letting us know that before we got married.

WENDY: That

was such good news, but it was a sign of things to come. Marty had already done so much work, but medical school brought even more. Then it was kind of the beginning of Marty being away and busy. I mean, not so much when we were spending time in college. But once medical school started, it was the beginning of that internship, the residency, the practice. That is a theme that continued into the next stages of our life. But, when he was around and when we dated, and when we were getting ready to get married and all, it was wonderful.

Both sides of the family at dinner after Marty and Wendy were engaged. From left: Victor Wandler, David Derrow, Philip D 足 errow, Muriel Derrow, Leah Wandler and Sandy Derrow.

THE PROPOSAL

WENDY: Marty had such a cute idea for the proposal. That moment was great. MARTY: It was pretty corny. WENDY: Marty was driving his parents’ red Rambler American. We got in the car, and there was a whole series of little notes. I went through this little scavenger hunt, following all the directions of where to look that Marty had set up. In the last place I looked, there was a box. A black box. I opened it up. There was the engagement ring. It was unexpected right then so it was a big surprise. It was beautiful. I put it on. I was over the moon. Then, we didn’t know what to do. So, we drove around. We were afraid to tell my parents. He was afraid they’d say no. MARTY: I don’t know if I was afraid. I think we wanted

to do what we wanted to do.

WENDY: It was kind of indicative of what we’ve done, everything on our own, and that we did on our way. MARTY: And so, I didn’t want to take a chance that

her dad would say no.

WENDY: I never expected that you would ask him. MARTY: He wasn’t thrilled when we told him after the

proposal. I remember he said, “You don’t have a job. You’re still in school. How are you going to do this?” We put it off. We didn’t get married for a year, and then as it turned out, well, actually we did get married even without knowing that I’d been admitted to med school. We had nothing.

WENDY: But we were in love and knew what we wanted.

OUR LOVE STORY

The Wedding Day K E E P I N G T H I N G S S I M P L E , T H E C O L L E G E S T U D E N T S O P T E D F O R A S M A L L A F FA I R

WENDY: We had our wedding at Congregation Agudas Achim in Bexley. It was where I went to Sunday school and Hebrew school growing up. I was not nervous about this day at all. I had no doubts. I was very excited that we could be married and finally live together. We got married in a small chapel. It was a very small wedding. I basically picked out things that my mother

liked. She liked the color blue so the flowers were blue. Blue was the predominant color. She loved harpists so we had a harp playing at the wedding. That was all fine with me. My dad, who had been reluctant when we were dating and all, was up for this wedding. MARTY: I wasn’t nervous either. I was ready. We had been

together for a while, for a few years and had been looking forward to it. I was young. I was only 20 years old, but I felt very comfortable. This was the right thing for me. I was excited. I was thrilled. I adored Wendy. I was ready to be a grownup and be together. WENDY: The wedding date was December 19 just because

it was Christmas break. I had one semester left. I graduated that following March. MARTY: Ohio State was offering a program for early ad-

mission to med school after three years of undergraduate. I applied. I did my interview. They let me know the day before we got married and went on our honeymoon. MARTY: We did the traditional vows. We didn’t make up

anything. I remember that gray suit, which didn’t really fit. I didn’t get a tuxedo. I had boot shoes on, black shoes that were ankle high boots. Mine was actually a bridesmaid’s dress in white. I didn’t want to overspend; I think it was $40.

WENDY:

The day’s blue touches were for Wendy’s mother, Leah.

MARTY: It was all a simple affair. But that day, Wendy

looked so very beautiful.

Vic’s fatherly wariness of Marty faded by the time he walked Wendy down the aisle.

On December 19, 1971, Wendy and Marty had a low-key, loving start to their life together. The decades ahead brought two daughters, many grandchildren and countless memories.

“We were very much

in love. We didn’t know anyone else like us, who were so close to each other.” — MARTY

The Wandlers with Marty and Wendy

The Derrows, from left: Chuck, Philip, Muriel, Andy, Sandy and David 52

Martyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s grandparents: Eva Bernstein (left) and Juncia and Eli Derrow.

OUR LOVE STORY

The Swinging Celebration L’ C H A I M ! M A R T Y A N D W E N D Y ’ S J O Y S P I L L E D O N T O T H E D A N C E F L O O R

First Dance “I’m smiling here, but this dance with my father made me cry. He was a doll. After being nervous about Marty early on, the two of them grew to be very close.”

The Party “This is my favorite picture of the whole wedding. Here at the reception, you can see the festivities got my father dancing and making a face like he’s really into it and having fun. My mother’s out there swinging too!” —WENDY

“

It was romantic that we were together, but we were just babies. ” —MARTY

The Caribbean honeymoon was the first of many — and better — trips to come.

Young Ohioans in love

HONEYMOON

After our wedding, we spent the first night at a hotel in Columbus. Wendy got tipsy on Cold Duck champagne, watched The Wonderful World of Disney on TV and thanked me profusely for bringing Mickey and Donald. The next day, Wendy’s mom and Aunt Faye threw minute rice on us at the airport as we left for a week in Freeport, Bahamas. We had some rain but plenty of sun. It was wonderful and romantic to be together, but we were so very young. At 20, I was underage to gamble, but we went to the casino anyway, promptly lost the $25 limit we’d agreed to, and left. Big spenders. —MARTY

Wendy and Marty with their own family: little Michelle and baby Amy.

PARENTHOOD

While juggling medical school and a teaching career, Marty and Wendy welcomed two sweet, distinctive daughters

PARENTHOOD

Baby Michelle S TA R T I N G F R O M S C R AT C H , T H E N E W P A R E N T S W O R K E D H A R D T O B U I L D T H E I R O W N FA M I LY

The sunny baby Michelle

The soon-to-be parents

MARTY: In those early days of our marriage, we had no

money, nothing. I got into medical school, I immediately got a student loan and paid and paid for med school. I didn’t have a car initially. Then Wendy did a summer camp. She got $800, and we bought a 1967 red Volkswagen Beetle. Totally beat up. But it drove like the VW in Woody Allen’s Sleeper. That was our car for years. When I graduated from med school, which was three years, Wendy was substituting and eventually teaching.

couldn’t get teaching jobs in those days. I called every single day to the Board of Education. “Do you have an opening? Do you have an opening?” I think they finally gave me a job just to get me off their backs. Then in Marty’s last year of medical school, I got pregnant with Michelle. It was right when we knew that you’d be graduating in May and earning money that Michelle was due. When she was pregnant, Wendy had some bleeding. We went to Miami with my grandparents.

MARTY: WENDY:

I had graduated a semester early, but you

WENDY: Marty’s grandparents, who we were the closest

to us of his family, said, “You’re going to be fine. This baby’s going to be fine. Everything’s going to be fine.” And they were right, thank goodness. I just still can’t believe it, how great. Michelle was born by C-section because she was breach. The doctor who delivered me in 1950 delivered Michelle in 1975, Dr. Franklin Hugenberger. The same hospital, too: Grant Hospital. Little Michelle was just the most gorgeous baby I had ever seen when she was born.

Wendy at the hospital with Michelle Rebecca Derrow, born May 1, 1975.

An especially joyous and prescient note from Wendy to Marty after the birth of Michelle.

Mother’s day out at a local carousel

At home on Grandon Avenue in Bexley

A perfect autumn scene.

A cherished photo with Grandpa Vic

The happy parents

Wendy and Grandma Leah

Michelle’s first birthday

A warm getaway

First Halloween together

Mommy and little Mommy Wendy and Michelle were especially close as Marty worked long hours. To pass the time, Wendy often read to Michelle a new magazine that had just debuted: People.

“ Michelle was

such a good baby who soon became a precious little lady.” —WENDY

Daddy and his little girl

A soft peck from Grandpa Vic

Celebrating the Fourth in Bexley 63

Wendy at the hospital with Amy Elise Derrow, born May 22, 1978.

PARENTHOOD

Baby Amy T H E T O T O F A T H O U S A N D FA C E S C A M E O U T R E A D Y T O R O C K A N D R O L L , L I T E R A L LY

WENDY: I had studied child development and three years was found to be a good age difference. We started trying to get pregnant and thought, “Well, if it’s two and a half years, that’s fine.” It ended up being three years and a month. That’s when Amy came along. Amy was an adorable baby and she was funny and she did funny things like she would rock in her crib and her crib was on a wood floor so it would slide across the floor. MARTY: She was a head-banger. She used to literally

bang her head. Michelle was sleeping through the nights at two weeks, three weeks maybe. Amy was a year.

that ramming thing she kept doing. WENDY: She was very funny. She would make us laugh.

WENDY: We thought we’d lose our minds. MARTY: We were just completely sleep deprived. Amy

rocked back and forth and rammed her forehead into the end of the crib. Sometimes the crib would slide up against the door, so we couldn’t open the door easily. Amy actually got a bald spot right where her hairline met her forehead, there was just hair broken off from

Michelle, you could put in a white dress and give her a chocolate ice cream cone and there wouldn’t be a drop. We put the same white dress on Amy and before she even got out the door, there was some stain on it. She was a lot of fun and always from the beginning interested in animals and things like that. And as shows in these photos, Amy from the very beginning did know how to make a lot of faces.

The “headbanger” in her infamous crib.

Wendy in Bexley with her little bundle of personality.

An early family beach trip.

Sisterly love.

“ Michelle and Amy

were very, very cute together. Right away, I loved having two daughters.” —WENDY

Face No. 237.

Bath time, play time.

Sweet snuggle.

The new Derrow girls.

Amyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s shortest hair. Amyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s first birthday.

ON FATHERHOOD

Although I was gone a lot because of work the first few years, I loved being a father. I loved having two daughters who were so lucky to have Wendy as their mom. When they were babies, I did most of the night feedings, sometimes falling asleep in the rocker holding their warm little sweetsmelling bodies. Later I read to the girls at bedtime, sometimes told stories. As they grew up and accomplished so many things, we canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t say enough how proud we are of them. We are so, so very lucky that they are our daughters. Parenthood has been absolutely wonderful. â&#x20AC;&#x201D; MARTY

One of the first family photos.

The first official family portrait, circa 1979.

The girls at a park in Columbus.

PARENTHOOD

The Sisters F R O M W A R M D AY S I N T H E P A R K T O S N O W B A L L F I G H T S I N T H E YA R D , T H E S I B L I N G S W E R E A LW AY S S I D E - B Y- S I D E

Michelle took charge of leading the way for her baby sister.

With dog Teddy atop a pile of snow in the Fair Avenue wood pile.

“ Michelle and Amy were very, very cute.

I loved watching them together. Life became so wonderful with these two daughters.” —WENDY

Michelle at age 1. “Michelle was like a little lady,” Wendy says.

Amy at age 1, in the same dress but very different expression. Marty says, “I love these pictures because they’re so characteristic of the girls’ personalities.”

“Michelle had impeccable manners her whole childhood,” Wendy says. “She could fit into any situation.”

Above: “Michelle could be really funny, witty,” Wendy says. “When she wanted to come up with something special, she had it together.” From top: The preschooler with angel-blond hair. Happy in pigtails. At a local park. A signature close-up by photographer Marty.

Above: “Amy has always been so darn sweet,” Wendy says. “She was a great kid, a little easier on the outside than Michelle because I think she held in her feelings more.” From top: Little Amy’s hair as jazzed up as she was. A contemplative look. Dressed for early success. Amy the people person.

“Amy was so cuddly,” Wendy says. “She was always eager to say, ‘I love you, Daddy.’ ”

Blasting off at King’s Island amusement park

Indian Princess dance with 8-year-old Michelle

Sweet, sisterly smiles

Family foursome

The Cupboard Kids

MICHELLE ’S FAVORITE MEMORIES

We had a classic American childhood. Well, Jewish-American. Bexley was a terrific small town to grow up in: Fourth of July parades down our block, apple-picking in the fall, pumpkin-carving at Halloween, snowball fights

in winter and daffodils in spring. I have so many happy memories of playing with Amy and with our neighbors. We must have spent hundreds of hours just doing kid stuff—lemonade stands, hopscotch, bike rides.

This was before smart phones, before cable TV... we loved playing in the backyard with our Barbies. And imaginary play, making up “routines” to music. I always had really nice friends and I enjoyed school. Mom volunteered

at Cassingham Elementary and I was so happy to have her there. Dad and I did Indian Princesses and I was so pleased to have that special time with him, just the two of us. I had many wonderful teachers, including Mrs.

Retzlaff, Mrs. Golden and Mr. Dill, all of whom encouraged my writing. Mostly I remember a happy childhood with the two best parents a kid could ever wish for, truly. Amy and I always felt loved and cherished. I

think we learned the most important values in life as kids: hard work, respect and a love of family. Our parents always encouraged us to do our best and never settle for less. It’s the kind of approach we now take with our own

Bexley tree

Autumn fun.

Eiffel Tower replica at King’s Island

Ready for ballet

Amy the climber

Basement recital

AMY ’S FAVORITE MEMORIES

I remember climbing the giant oak trees in Bexley and having a cozy spot to read. If I couldn’t climb the trees I would climb the doorways! I remember having my stuffed animal hospital under the sink, and Dad giving me

supplies from his office to use in my “practice.” I remember having so many fun parties that Mom threw. Michelle and I basically had the basement to ourselves and I remember doing our pretend Wonder Woman

dances and playing school. We used to make forts out of cardboard “bricks.” I loved doing Indian Princesses with Dad and walking to school. I remember Mom and Dad making huge batches of applesauce—it would

take all day! We moved from Ohio when I had finished second grade so my childhood memories are split between Ohio and Florida. When we left, I remember thinking that we would never have as cool a home as the one

we had in Ohio. But then we got to Florida and we had a pool, and all these lizards running around. I remember Dad calling 911 when we had our first snake encounter. None of us had any clue! Growing up, Mom and Dad always

encouraged us to follow our passions and make the most out of life. When we were little, they really let us be kids. As we grew up, they made us each feel like we were capable of anything. That’s a wonderful gift.

“

Both girls have always had such great strengths that elevated each of them.” —WENDY

ELI DAVID

J UN C IA

VIC

FAMILY ROOTS

LEAH

ELI

The generations came together in the close-knit Columbus community

MU RIEL

The Derrows

T I LLIE

FAY E

C HU C K

EVA

A N DY

DAVID

SA N DY

PHILIP

SHERRY

ELI

J U NC IA

SO L

ALAN

RIC H AR D

LY NNE

LEAH

FAY E

T ED

T ILLIE

IRENE

Z ELDA

Reunion with Leah’s siblings and cousins Richard and Lynne, the Hollywood actors.

“ My parents adored the girls. VIC

Just adored them.” —WENDY

LEAH

PARENTHOOD

The Big Florida Move I N 19 8 6 , T H E D E R R OW S D EC I D E D IT WA S T I M E TO E S C A P E T H E O H I O W I N T E R

Visiting Magic Kingdom.

Reveling in the biggest pool in all of Sabal Point.

MARTY: My office window in my practice faced the take-

grandparents were in Florida and my Aunt Lee and off paths of the Columbus airport. I used to sit there all Uncle Pat lived in Miami. We thought about California winter long in that gray and depressing weather, think- but it was too far away. Florida seemed like a natural. ing, “Where are those people going?” MARTY: In 1986, we decided to leave. I literally just WENDY: We hated the weather. We hated the winter. closed my practice, gave the charts to another clinic. I We were both on the same page about Florida. Marty’s didn’t get any money for it, made nothing.

WENDY: Marty saw an ad for Orlando Health Care Group.

He went down to interview and called me: “I just got off the plane. It’s February, 75 degrees, and the sky is crystal blue.” I was back in Columbus in the gray and snow. When we decided we had to move, people either thought we were out of our minds. You’re leaving, this and that. Or they thought, we were the greatest smartest

The doctor prescribes himself some Florida sun.

The girls’ new backyard (practically).

people. Get out of Columbus, go to Florida, good for you. MARTY: People love it in Columbus and their parents

had lived there, generations of people. There’s a lot of those deep, deep family roots in the northern cities. People go into the family business like my Dad’s business. It’s a common scenario. I actually just looked in

the New England Journal of Medicine and a lot of ads were there from physician groups that were looking to hire. The group at the time was only a year old and they were just hiring doctors and that was it. Came to the interview, got the job. WENDY: When we first moved, the community of Sabal

Point was not even finished being built. They had a country club and it was really plush and brand new. We had come from a neighborhood with older homes, so Sabal was a winner. We were told the best schools were in Longwood or in Maitland. Then we kept thinking the kids are young and we’ll enjoy Disney World. In every sense, it ended up being a great move for us.

Disneyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Grand Floridian

Backyard pool

Universal Studios

Dining with Mickey

Hollywood fun at Disney

The historic fort in 86St. Augustine

Enjoying the theme parks as only locals can.

Universal with Leah

“ The kids adjusted

very well to our new life in Florida. And Marty had more vacation time, which was perfect.” —WENDY Swan boats in downtown Orlando

The famous teacups

Kennedy Space Center

Collared in the Florida surf

1975: Li’l pumpkin

1978: Princess (non-Disney)

1985: Fairy and cleaning lady

1987: Counting up the candy

HALLOWEEN FOR THE AGES Costume choices for the Derrow sisters creatively reflected the girls’ diverging personalities

1978: Princess with Ohio topcoat

1979: Ladybug clown

1982: Bride and Strawberry Shortcake

1984: Bride (unmasked) and mouse

1983: Witch and clown with topcoat

1987: Hockey player and Queen Elizabeth

1985: Frosted jack-o-lantern

1989: Florida teen

1988: Pirate gymnast and cat woman

1985: Heart clown

“

Michelle did great. With both girls, we never gave a second thought worrying about how they’d do.” —WENDY

PARENTHOOD

Michelle’s Bat Mitzvah GUE STS FROM OHIO A ND FLORIDA CON VERGED FOR THE FIR ST BIG E VENT SINCE THE MOVE

Marlene Schaus

Irene, Ted, Faye and Leah

The host family Michelle and friends

The Mayers

Nancy Paul and Merrill Shapiro

WENDY: We hadn’t lived in Florida for very long when it

was time for Michelle’s bat mitzvah in 1988. We had some new friends here that we invited, like Jim and Marlene Schaus. But we also had friends from Columbus that came. A fair amount made the trip. I think they wanted to check out our house too and see how we were making out in all this sunshine. My mother and Aunt Faye also came, as did Uncle Ted and Aunt Irene from South Florida. We had a very good turnout. The event was kind of a transition from Columbus to here. We kept it very simple, which was kind of nice because we didn’t have to compete. In Columbus, it was

a competition, who was doing the most. I guess that hasn’t changed. It was interesting because our rabbi and good friend from Columbus, Merrill Shapiro, had moved here too. We had all been camp counselors together, so we had all known each other since we were teenagers. He was here and he was going to perform the bat mitzvah, which was great, but they didn’t have a synagogue yet for him. So Michelle was bat mitzvah’d in a church. MARTY: The congregation shared space with a Lutheran

church in Casselberry. Merrill would bring in an ark

and put it in the social hall and have services and then they’d wrap it up and put it away so the Christians could come and have their Sunday service. That’s essentially what we did for Michelle. We kept it simple, low-key. The party was in our backyard. There was a fortune teller, and we had catering. Still, I think everyone had a good time. Like Steve Martin wanted to do for his daughter’s wedding in Father of the Bride. Except Michelle didn’t argue. She seemed very happy with so many relatives, familiar faces and new school friends around on what was a beautiful spring day.

PARENTHOOD

Amy’s Bat Mitzvah T H E S TA R S T U D E N T W A S R E A D Y F O R A D U LT H O O D O N A M A G I C A L D AY

Rabbi Shapiro and Amy

Friends and family

Uncle Jack with the girls

WENDY: Just like with Amy in school, we never worried

Ready to celebrate

Uncle Alan and magician

MARTY: We followed a similar formula as Michelle’s bat at all that she wouldn’t be just fine at her bat mitzvah. mitzvah, though instead of a fortune teller, there was a Michelle had been the same way. Amy had gone to magician. He wasn’t that good, but he was giving it his Hebrew school, did her studying of the Torah portion. best shot. Alan especially seemed to enjoy the tricks. Merrill Shapiro oversaw her preparation just like he Again, we had catering in the backyard, back when we had Michelle’s. So when Amy’s big day came and she had a gazebo out there. stood in front of the entire congregation, she was ready. There was really no stress for either of us leading We didn’t have as many people from Columbus this up to the bat mitzvah and the day of. Amy had done a time. We had the Mayers and the Watermans, of course. terrific job preparing on her own. Our good friends. But by then, it was three years later and so we had more friends from here. I think we had WENDY: Amy and Michelle were both doing their thing, some doctors, Marty, from your group for Amy’s. so Marty and I decided to just enjoy.

The Watermans

“

The day was such a happy event. We thoroughly enjoyed every minute.” —WENDY

THE TEEN YEARS

1. “Michelle and Livvy met

as penpals from Bexley, Ohio, and Bexley, England, and she met Pascale through a French exchange student program,” Wendy says. “Pascale was serious but I loved her.”

2 . “This picture may be cute to you but it’s terrifying to me,” Marty says. “Michelle drove up on the neighbor’s lawn and, on a separate occasion, insisted there was such a thing as ‘left turn on red.’” “Michelle learning to d rive

was the first time that I felt out of control,” Wendy says. “Time marches on and you just have to have faith that you can’t control everything.”

3 . “When Michelle visited Livvy and Pascale in Europe, she was very homesick,” Wendy says. “But Livvy was very lively when she came to see us.”

“I don’t know what possessed us to take Pascale to King Henry’s Feast among the tourist traps on International Drive,” Marty says. “It was not a happy day for Pascale.”

5. “For senior homecoming, Michelle went with Brian Peyser,” Wendy says. “She didn’t mean for her hair to be such a wall on her head. She was still finding her style.”

6. “Ryan and Amy were

7. “We followed Amy to great friends,” Wendy says. her prom,” Marty admits. “Homecoming was right on “We walked in and a chapthe verge of them leaving erone said, ‘Uh, what are their braces behind.” you doing here? You really have to go home.’ We were just curious. We didn’t want to miss anything.”

8 . “Michelle was a leader

in so many activities in high school,” Marty says. “Editor of the literary magazine, state president of the French association. She spoke in front of hundreds of people.”

9. “Michelle and Amy

both looked so gorgeous on their prom nights,” Wendy says. “I remember when Noel Southall gave her that corsage.”

1 0. “Throughout their

teen years, we were so proud of the girls,” Marty says. “They had very little teen angst.”

“Amy graduated as the valedictorian of her class of more than 600 students,” Marty says. “Crazy. She was so into her academics and going all out with her grades. All that work paid off.” 11.

PARENTHOOD

25th Anniversary Surprise T H O U G H T H E G I R L S H A D L E F T T H E N E S T, T H E Y W E N T A L L O U T F O R A W E L L- D E S E R V E D C E L E B R AT I O N

The Invitation “We really didn’t know about any of this,” Wendy says. “Michelle and Amy put together this beautiful evening all by themselves. They really took a great deal of pride in that.”

The Limousine “The girls used their own money for all of this, even though they were just college students,” Marty says. “When the limo pulled up, I was amazed. They went all out to make this night memorable for us.”

The Dinner The girls made a reservation for four at the fanciest restaurant in Orlando: Victoria and Albert’s at the Grand Floridian.

The Ketubah “We thought we had lost our ketubah,” Marty says. “They had this new one made for us. It was wonderful.” “Yes, yes, it was fabulous,” Wendy says. “We were very appreciative and very proud of them. I still can’t believe that they are our daughters. How did we get so lucky?”

OUR ADVENTURES The family crisscrossed the country on epic vacations that sparked tales both good and ... well, memorable

A classic family vacation photo on a road trip through the American West

Dolphins in Florida

Water skiing at the Nevele Resort in upstate New York

Amy on a Nevele pony

At Cedar Point amusement park

Sisters at the Nevele

At the Nevele

With a Canada goose

Meeting Yogi 100

Michelle on a Nevele horse

OUR ADVENTURES

Here, There and Everywhere R AT H E R T H A N J U S T S E E I N G T H E S I G H T S , T H E S E T R I P S W E R E A B O U T T H E T I M E S P E N T T O G E T H E R

The Nevele was an early favorite for the young family.

Marty on Traveling “In Ohio, I was self-employed, so it was hard to take time off. But when we moved to Florida, I got a lot of vacation time. So I wanted to make sure we could take advantage of it by doing some big trips that could mean a lot to us.”

Wendy and Michelle share a happy vacation moment.

Wendy on Traveling “Marty has always been the planner, usually picking when and where we’ve gone. I make sure that he relaxes, that we all do. These trips go by in a blink, and we have to get the most out of them. It’s our best chance to spend the most time together.”

101

Mount Washington, New Hampshire

The Washington Monument

The White House

The U.S. Capitol

White Dove Cottage, Cape May, New Jersey

Niagara Falls

The Lincoln Memorial 102

Wendy relaxes on the couple’s 10th anniversary trip to Cancun.

Niagara Falls. “This was actually a fairly short drive from Columbus,” Marty says.

The girls in New England

“ We drove up to Maine

“Cancun was much etter than our Bahamas b honeymoon,” Marty says.

“The girls stayed with our cleaning lady, Sissy.” Wendy says.

and stopped everywhere along the way. We went to D.C. twice. There’s so much to show your kids.” —MARTY 103

The view near the Sequoia ational Park cabin, which had N no TV for watching soap operas.

“We went up to the rim of the Grand Canyon, said, ‘Yup,’” then got back in the car,” Marty remembers. “We didn’t have a hotel there and so had somewhere else we had to be.”

104

The happy dad on a perfect Yosemite day.

“OK, they don’t look happy,” Marty says. “More like, ‘Dad, oh my God.’”

OUR ADVENTURES

The Great American West T H I S W A S M A R T Y ’ S D R E A M T R I P, E V E N I F E V E R Y O N E D I D N ’ T A LW AY S S H A R E H I S E N T H U S I A S M

WENDY: The most memorable family vacation without

a doubt was California. That was both for the reasons you’d expect on such a classic trip and for the, well, let’s just say the “unique” memories that our family created.

The family poses at a scenic overlook at Yosemite National Park.

MARTY: That trip was epic. Everybody’s got these pic-

tures. There’s Yosemite and all the photo ops. WENDY: What you don’t see in photos like that, includ-

ing ours, is how when we got to Yosemite and the cabin was dirty and we had to buy flipflops to walk to the bathroom, which was sickening. MARTY: It

was a communal bath area. What’s wrong

with that? WENDY: It’s still sickening.

We were in the most beautiful place in the world, by the way. Surrounded by waterfalls. Half Dome straight ahead. The Merced River. Yosemite Falls to your left. Just nothing but beauty — oh, and my kids and my wife saying, “Eewww.” MARTY:

WENDY: Then there’s a couple other significant things. Then we’re in the middle of the desert driving, like one mile an hour, and we told Marty ... MARTY: Sixty miles an hour.

MARTY: The best thing with that was we were driving

MARTY: We were driving along literally in the middle

through the Navajo reservation, which covers four states you know, large areas where there’s just nothing. There’s just a highway here and a hundred miles the other direction there’s another highway, and so you’re driving along and you just don’t see much of anything. It’s kind of the desert plains.

of nowhere. You couldn’t see a sign of life anywhere. And then I see an Indian woman walking along with an umbrella over her head, because it was so hot and sunny, just in the middle of nowhere. Where is she going? Where did she come from? In no hurry at all. Because you know why? It’s their land.

WENDY: Oh, I know ...

WENDY: I should have seen that coming.

WENDY: … to go a little faster and he said, “This is not

our land.”

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Everyone was happier to see the Golden Gate Bridge.

The true SF experience was about to start.

THE SIT-IN

This has become one of many famous stories in our family history, if not the most famous. During our trip out West, Michelle sat down in a huff in the streets of San Francisco. WENDY:

No, there is no photographic evidence of this incident. I had my camera with me at all times during this trip, of course, but I was way too mortified to snap a shot of our teenager plunked down, refusing to move, in front of Fisherman’s Wharf. There were only two times in her life she did that: in San Francisco and on a hike up Stone Mountain in Georgia. MARTY:

WENDY: Look at her in this photo of “The San Francisco Experience.” That captures it.

Yes, you look at that expression, and you can get a sense of how Michelle was feeling that day. So that whole area there is great for walking, coming from the Ghirardelli’s chocolate factory, going by the cable cars. You could walk that stretch easily. It’s not even a mile probably. But on this day, that was like this terrible distance we were walking. It was such a beautiful area right on the waterfront. Michelle did not want to take another step. Not one more. Literally. So she sat down and glared at me behind those sunglasses. That’s classic teenager. MARTY:

WENDY:

I love that expression.

MARTY: Amy on this particular day was just rolling her eyes. I think she was just trying not to be annoying too. WENDY:

She was. She held it in.

I will always remember those green sunglasses like they were burned into my brain.

MARTY:

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“

Years later, we’re still laughing about this trip out West. It was memorable, but not in the ways we expected. ” —WENDY

The view in Sedona, Arizona

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Amy at Half Dome

THE SUMMIT

Both Amy and Michelle would complain on hikes. “I’m not walking another minute.” But sometimes Amy would go willingly, like at Half Dome in Yosemite. On this West trip, we also went to Sequoia National Park, and I wanted to climb Moro Rock. You have to walk up these steep stone steps all the way to the top. Michelle said, “I’m not doing it.” She stayed at the bottom with Wendy. Amy said, “I’ll do it.” So we hiked to the top and then hiked back down, about an hour. While we were gone, these two were eaten alive by mosquitos. They were very unhappy. Now as an adult, Michelle would be very game to do it. But not as a teenager. —MARTY

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With Ted Turner in Atlanta

At the World of Coca-Cola

The show at SeaWorld Orlando

“This was at the top of Stone Mountain near Atlanta,” Marty says. “Michelle had laid down on the path. People hiking by were like, ‘Whoa!’ and had to walk around her. It wasn’t enough for her to say, ‘I’m not going any further.’ She had to just prostrate herself.”

“ We covered a lot of

ground as a family. Now as adults, the girls have both found their own sense of adventure.” —MARTY

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Sightseeing in New York

A favorite escape to Hilton Head, South Carolina

One of many Manhattan trips over the years

The infamous Four Seasons soufflé dinner: “Sir, if you have to ask,” the waiter said, “you can’t afford them.”

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OUR ADVENTURES

The Joy of Italy THEIR 25TH ANNIVER SARY TRIP KICKED OFF A NE W ER A OF GLOBE TROT TING

This was our first meaningful trip overseas. We wanted to mark our 25th anniversary. Italy was a great trip. Italy is very user-friendly and it was a nice, romantic place to go. I planned it, pretty much. At that time, you could still find travel agents who would work with you. We got a great travel agent, we told him approximately where we wanted to go and he helped us pick out all the places. I had some information also from The New York Times, so I found some places for us to stay. It was a fantastic trip. I was relaxed, we weren’t rushed. Wendy and I had plenty of time to do everything and see everything that we chose to do. We limited our itinerary. We had two weeks and we only went to about four different places, but we stayed in each one long enough to kind of just live there for a little bit. A great trip. —marty

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Marty at the Colosseum in Rome

“Italy proved to be as romantic as we were hoping,” Wendy says. “I still remember walking through Rome and the towns, gelato in hand.”

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Vino and good food every night

“We biked from Florence up into the hills,” Marty says. “It was hard, very steep.”

A rare photo of Wendy on a bike!

“Gladiators” outside the 114 Colosseum

The guide in Rome was a Cuomo, as in the New York Cuomos.

“ For the first 25 years of our marriage,

we had worked so hard with the girls and our jobs. This trip reminded us how much we loved being a couple, whether in Italy or anywhere.” —WENDY

At the end of the bike ride outside Florence

Original caption from the Italy photo album: “Marty finds his hog.”

The first of many great trips for the soon-to-be empty-nesters.

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Marty realized his dream when he returned to the Grand Canyon with Amy to hike down and back up in an epic journey.

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OUR ADVENTURES

The Grand Canyon M A RT Y A N D A MY C O N Q U ER ED TH E G R A N D C A N YO N N OT O N C E , B U T T W I C E !

Amy surveys the route.

The adventurers on the rim.

On our family trip out West, we had barely seen the Grand Canyon. Ever since then, I had been dying to go back. I just wanted to hike it. I’d love to do it again, and again, and again, and again. It’s a wonderful experience. It was probably my idea, but Amy was game, so we went in 2000 right after she graduated from the University of Florida. We did it again when she graduated from med school.

The first time we learned to do it better the next time. It was really hard the first time. It was easier the second time. The nice thing about the Grand Canyon is there are lots of fun moments. Early in the morning, when you first break camp and go out on the trail, and the sun is just barely coming up, it’s still sort of dawn, is really kind of magical. It’s very quiet. You don’t hear anything at all except maybe just the other hikers

whispering and then just the animals. It’s kind of drudgery once the sun is really up because it’s hot and by that point, you’ll only be getting close to your destination. Early in the morning is great and then beyond that, honestly, when you’re crossed over and you go up the other side and you hit the top of the south rim, that’s amazing because what that means is you can take a hot shower and have a great meal.

Maybe the best moment is getting into a hot shower when you’ve got four days of sweat and dirt and you’re just kind of grimy and stinky. You’re hungry as hell and getting to take a hot shower, laying down on a comfortable bed, and then going to the El Tovar restaurant and having just the biggest prime rib that they’ve got in the restaurant. Stuffing yourself. It’s just so good. It’s the reward for all that work. —marty

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OUR ADVENTURES

Cozy in England M A RT Y A N D W E N DY M A D E TH E B E S T O F A C O L D TR IP TH A N K S TO C LOT TED C R E A M IN “ H O B B IT V IL L E ”

Dinner with the Clacketts: Julie, Derek and Michelle’s pen pal Livvy.

Wendy warms up at The Dandy Lion in Bradford-onAvon.

We decided to go to London and out to Bath and Bradford-on-Avon, following Michelle and Chris’ trip there. But we shouldn’t have gone in February. It was wet, gray and cold. Still, that made for some cozy memories, like seeing plays in London or bundling up at the baths. We got to see our English pen pal, Livvy, and her parents, Derek and Julie. They were so witty and self-deprecating, as all the

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Wendy gets a smile from a Beefeater at the Tower of London.

English people seemed to be. One afternoon it was raining, of course, and we were in the town of Bradford-on-Avon. This old, quaint little place is like Hobbitville. Literally. We had read about a place that was supposed to be the oldest, historic tea and scone place or something like that. So it was raining, about 4 o’clock, and we can’t find it. Where the hell is this place?! Then we find it, basically

under a bridge on the other side of the river. It was off to the side, like going into a hobbit house. I don’t think it had a round door, but I mean, the door was about five feet tall. It was really a rather small door. When you open the door, and kind of stoop to go in and inside they had a fire. We went in there and it was warm, and had a nice fire going and they had the women dressed in little bonnets and little

aprons and things. We sat down and they brought us as satisfying a meal as after the Grand Canyon hike. It was so simple but just so perfect for what we wanted on that day. Just a pot of tea, wonderful scones, lots of clotted cream and lemon curd. Wendy says that was the best moment of the trip for her. We were in heaven. That’s a great, great memory. —marty

Wendy and Marty at the Tower Bridge in London.

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OUR ADVENTURES

On the Trail in Santa Fe A M O R E C I V I L I Z E D W I L D W E S T T R I P T O T H I S FAV O R I T E N E W M E X I C O C I T Y

Black-and-white offers a dramatic look.

Wendy crafts with Marlene Schaus (far left).

We’ve been to Santa Fe a few times. I had a conference there once, and Marty had a conference there. These photos are from a time we went there with Marlene and Jim Schaus. We go horseback riding a lot of times when we travel. But we’d never done it in Santa Fe until this trip. Jim wanted to go and he found a great place. The gentleman who led us had been in movies. He’s actually very

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good looking under that beard. We had a great time that trip with them and the horseback riding was great. Santa Fe’s a very comfortable place for us to go. We know our way around and we have a good time there. We’ve gone to the opera there. Mostly you go there, what we would do is we’d just walk. The downtown area’s very user-friendly, it’s very small. Basically it’s art galleries and restau-

rants. The state government is there, but they’re kind of off to another area. We’d just get up, have breakfast, walk around. Do this or that. Eat a little bit more. Walk around some more and then find something else to do. This horseback riding was something unusual that we did. We also went to a little town that’s south of Santa Fe. That’s where Marty found the local artist who made our

The horse guide and real-life movie cowboy.

fountain that’s out in our front entrance at home. He quarried it right there in New Mexico. Formed it and did all the work for it and he shipped it out here. It seems like it weighs about a ton. He had about five or six out in his place there and we said I like that one. He just quarries them out of big blocks of granite. We can’t wait to go back and find more souvenirs. —wendy

Wendy and Marty ride with Jim Schaus in New Mexico.

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OUR ADVENTURES

A Toast to Napa Valley T H E C L A S S I C T R I P D O N E R I G H T W I T H T H E B E S T PA R T N E R S I N W I N E , T H E S C H AU S E S

Wine-tasting heaven

Napa was cool. I got the name of this winemaker from my local wine shop. This man, he and his wife, owned a beautiful home, high on a hill, overlooking everything in the mountains there. He invited us to his home. Gave us wine, gave us barrel tastings. Literally went into his basement and he removed samples of wine from wine that wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even bottled yet. Really cool. We went with the Marlene and Jim Schaus, and Jim tried to get us in trouble, jumping fences and drinking wine. Maybe wine and Jim are both good for me. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Marty

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A top-down road trip among the vineyards

Cheers to the great 足traveling 足partners, 足 arlene and Jim Schaus. M

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Taking off in a Napa hot-air balloon

Marty above the valley

Birdâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s-eye view of the famous Napa vineyards

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Visiting San Francisco art museums

Fine dining

“

This is my favorite picture of all time. Jim can really get Marty to laugh. He’s not silly that often.” —WENDY

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OUR ADVENTURES

Vive La France! WONDERFUL FRIENDS , AN EPIC ME AL AND, OH YE S , THE MONA LISA M ADE THIS TRIP E X TR AORDINARY

Notre Dame

The Louvre

France was fabulous. I have to say, it started off with a bang because of our former French foreign exchange student, Pascale, and her husband, Samuel Amiet. When we got to our hotel, there was a box of chocolates waiting. Then we were off and running. France was great and so many things stand out for me. Besides the sights, the Louvre and the Eiffel Tower and so much more, we went to Monetâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s house. Beautiful, his home, his gardens and everything. Pascale and Sam drove us to

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Versailles and stayed with us as tour guides, along with their son, Mathieu. Everything about that day was magnificent. Being in a foreign country and having people with you that cared about you and that you knew. Then they took us to an epic 12course meal at a restaurant we never would have found on our own. We enjoyed delicious dish after delicious dish. That was one of the greatest, if not the best, meal of our lives. Paris was just a magical trip. If we could duplicate that trip, we would. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;wendy

â&#x20AC;&#x153;This was a trip where everything just worked out so perfectly,â&#x20AC;? Marty says.

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â&#x20AC;&#x153;I had never seen any place soTaubers lush, historic The on theand vast as Versailles,â&#x20AC;? Wendy says. front deck in Estes.

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The 12-course meal of the century.

At Versailles with Samuel, 足Pascale and Mathieu Amiet.

Marveling at the flying buttresses of Notre Dame in Paris.

The artistic morning after.

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OUR ADVENTURES

Wild Costa Rica T H I S C E N T R A L A M E R I C A N G E TA W AY W A S F I L L E D W I T H W AT E R FA L L S , B U T T E R F L I E S A N D F R O G S , O H M Y !

We would both go back to Costa Rica in a heartbeat. As Wendy says, it was relaxing, relaxing, relaxing, with beautiful, beautiful nature and easy hiking. It was challenging, but not beyond Wendy’s capability. Exploring the rainforest, seeing the hanging bridges, taking in the waterfall gardens, the Arenal volcano, all of it was so lush and stunning. We stayed at a spectacular resort. We wish we could take the whole family there sometime. It was only a 20-room hotel with the feeling that

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you were staying in a gigantic zoo, with nobody else there except this wildlife. There was the biggest butterfly house I’ve ever seen in my life. It was the size of a full football field, really. All covered in glass. Completely enclosed, with just a blizzard of butterflies, if you can imagine such a thing. I mean literally millions of these purple, phosphorescent butterflies, just everywhere. And there was a hummingbird garden. Hummingbirds everywhere, landing all around. It was just gorgeous and all so very cool. —marty

Hiking a volcano

The Costa Rican nightlife

“These amazing waterfalls had trails you could walk down, stone trails that people had to have laid,” Marty says. “The effort that went into them is mind-boggling.”

A lizard close-up

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At the Floralis GenĂŠrica in downtown Buenos Aires.

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OUR ADVENTURES

Argentina Riches T H E H I G H L I G H T O F T H I S S O U T H A M E R I C A N D E S T I N AT I O N ? A P O L O R A N C H — A N D M O R E H O R S E S

At the Buenos Aires tomb of Eva Peron, Evita.

“The owners of this amazing ranch really just had all that land as a place to keep their polo horses,” Marty says.

I had a patient who was Argentinian. He kept telling me we had to go. The best part of the trip was the time that we stayed at a ranch in the country. That place was unbelievable. We drove down these dusty roads forever. Then finally pull in and walked out back to see just an endless expanse of land. Three polo fields, perfectly manicured. There was money, money, money. These were European bazillionaires. They own oil companies. Literally. I’d go back to that place in a heartbeat. —Marty

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OUR ADVENTURES

Cruising Alaska W E N D Y ’ S FA N TA S Y T R I P C A M E T R U E I N T H I S E P I C V O YA G E

Alaska is a trip I’ve always wanted to do. You have to take a cruise. I can see why everybody loves to go to Alaska because you feel like you’re in another country. You see these glaciers, these icebergs, and it’s magnificent. We went with the Schauses (of course), plus Jim’s brother and sister-in-law. Marty and the guys did the hiking excursions while we stayed on the beautiful ship. This trip was a true highlight of all our adventures. —wendy

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“It was a nice combination of being on a boat and relaxing, and just chilling, and then being able to go on excursions and really see things,” Marty says. “A couple of things you really just see on the boat, and then sometimes on land, going through glaciers. It was impressive.”

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“

I had never seen scenery like this. Of all the places we’ve been, Alaska truly blew me away.” —WENDY

An ice floe against the expansive Alaskan coast as photographed from the top deck of the cruise ship.

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Harbor seals relaxing on a buoy

The Intrepid Adventurer MARTI N H. D E RROW

Jim took this picture of me and it’s kind of funny in a way. Like the adventurer. I’m looking into the distance. We were just having fun. I had to turn my cap around because I was taking so many pictures, the bill of my cap kept banging against the camera. I couldn’t see, so I just said the hell with that. I’m turning it around. That’s almost a good picture of me in some way. — marty

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The blue ice glaciers would sometimes break off and crash into the cold ocean.

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Marty and Wendy, the Schauses and Jimâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sister and brother-in-law brace for the wind.

Marty and Wendy warm up on dry land.

The group readies for a Zodiac ride.

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Marty follows the guide on a path through the riverbed of ice melt.

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Marty conquers another memorable hike..

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The group kayaks through the bay on an exhilarating Alaskan day.

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One of the views only accessible via boat

Mini iceberg

Hiking guide

Orca in the wild

Jim in the wild

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Alaska by rail â&#x20AC;&#x201D; the next trip?

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“Great weather, beautiful s cenery, Marty with me,” Wendy says. “Alaska couldn’t have been better.”

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Ultimate cyclist

Passing the torch

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Sharing the thrill

With the new Harley

OUR ADVENTURES

Bikes and Bikes TO U R D E M A R T Y ! T H E C YC L I N G E N T H U S I A S T F O U N D A PA S S I O N F O R M OTO R C YC L E S TO O

I started cycling in Columbus thanks to a friend, Joe Paul. Never did it before in my life. I bought a Schwinn and started riding and I found that I had an affinity for it. I’m not an athlete, but I did OK. I really found that I enjoyed it and then when we came down to Orlando, for me, that was just what I was going to do. I immediately joined the local bike club and biked every weekend pretty much for close to 20 years and was good enough to have fun at it. Motorcycling I just began in Florida. This was a motorcycle hot area. I didn’t know anybody that had one. I did it all on my own and just because of the Daytona Bike Week, I got a hankering to see what that was all about. I used to go hang out at the Harley dealership. Again, it was kind of like doing plays in high school. It was very different for me. I just found it was something that I wanted to try. I thought biking and motorcycling were the same thing, they’re very different. I just found I really liked the motorcycle. I liked the freedom of it. I liked the skill of it. It’s like flying a plane in a way. You have to be proficient. You get that way by practicing, practicing, practicing. People who are really into motorcycling really put a lot of value on being skilled at what you do and if you’re not skilled, you’re more likely to get hurt. I liked the concentration of it and the pleasure of it. Then when I met Brooks Preacher, who was a patient and the only patient I’ve ever had that became a friend, we started traveling up and down the Eastern Seaboard and had some wonderful trips together, and that was a time I really valued. Bicycling and motorcycling are very, very different. They’re different pleasures. —MARTY On an epic motorcycle road trip with friend Brooks Preacher.

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Riding in Argentina

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An early ride

Riding with the girls

THE HORSES

Horses have meant a lot to me. Horseback riding for me is something that when I’m doing it, I don’t think about anything else. I’m in the flow. I find it very relaxing, very therapeutic and I’ve taken lessons off and on. Horse grooming is also very therapeutic, brushing the horse, I love it. Marty and I went riding together when we were dating. One time I fell off the horse. The saddle came undone. Marty got off his horse, walked back to me, and re-saddled the horse. We had both taken lessons and were comfortable enough to know how to put a saddle on, how to cinch it up, how to put the bridle on. It’s something we’ve enjoyed together. —WENDY

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CAREERS

Marty and Wendy worked hard to follow their passions and encouraged the girls to do the same

Amy opens Derrow Dermatology upstairs from Marty and Wendyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s offices.

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CAREERS

The Respected Doctor T H E P AT I E N T ’ S N E E D S H AV E B E E N T H E G U I D I N G P R I N C I P L E F R O M T H E B E G I N N I N G

Marty in his Ohio State medical school yearbook.

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I finished my residency in 1978 and went into practice. My brother Chuck was already in practice, and they weren’t looking at anybody in that group, so I just opened an office on the corner, on Main Street. I had my own office and have one nurse and Wendy and Wendy’s mother at various times to help me work in there. I did that for about a year and a half, and I worked at Heritage House, eventually being the medical director there. I also worked for the Social Security Administration just to make ends meet because we didn’t have enough money. I did whatever I could. Then gradually practice got a little bit busier. I ran into another doctor, Kelley Brennan, at the Mount Carmel East Hospital. He was with a partner Fred Worley. Fred owned the building that he was practicing in. I joined them and we were there together for a couple of years. Kelley and I hit it off. We left and opened our own practice together. We were in practice for probably close to six years. Had a very nice practice. I think we really got along with each other. We’re very simpatico. Still, we wanted to move our family to Florida. I did miss Kelley, and luckily we’ve remained friends ever since. In Orlando, I joined what became the Physician Associates group when there were only 13 physicians. Now we have more than 90. My career plan at the time was just to do my job. Do what I always did. I had gone from private practice in Ohio, and then joined a small group here, doing something new, HMO. Population management, something which died completely about 10 years after that and now it’s back in the form of PPOs and

more ACOs and the whole attempt now is to rein things in again and get more control. For me, it’s always been about the same thing: just taking care of patients and providing cost-effective care. I always felt it was appropriate to think about what you’re doing and how much money you’re spending. It’s other people’s money. You have to get patients involved in the decision-making. I’ve always taken it to heart to utilize resources carefully, other people’s resources. They’re not mine. I’ve tried to really concentrate on internal medicine. I just wanted to be a really good internist. I use all of my knowledge and skill to take care of my patients. My philosophy and my core principles are to advocate my patient’s needs, which is not something you always see. It’s hard because that involves really thinking and working with patients to help them understand what’s in their best interest. And to get their feedback on what it is they really want out of life, especially in geriatric situations when they literally have to make life-

“

Taking care of patients and providing cost-effective care is key.” —MARTY

With Wendy and nurse Sherri

and-death decisions. Or decisions that may affect how they live the last years or months of their lives. Help them understand how that works and what are reasonable expectations. What are maybe not such reasonable expectations. That’s hard, but people need that. I’ve been busy since I’ve been here. The group has gone up and down in its business model and switched from being an HMO salaried job to a compensation system that rewards productivity. I’ve done well in that, but not super crazy because I don’t have a crazy big practice. I just have a busy practice. I’ve held a variety of leadership roles within the group and I’ve been the chief in my department for a long time, about 15 years now. But the thing that I really like, to be honest, is just being with patients. I just like when the door closes and I’m in with the patient. That’s the thing I like. I don’t think I’m particularly gifted at the management stuff. It’s not my passion. I’ve been here 28 years. I have patients who have been with me close to 28 years. There’s a history there. We’ve grown old together. Literally. A lot of my patients have aged into geriatric. They weren’t that way when I met them. I’d say honestly my proudest accomplishment is just maintaining my practice and maintaining my core values that whole time, despite the fact that we started with one model. In Ohio, you would see a patient, you would bill for your services, and whatever you made, you made from providing those services. I came to Orlando and joined a group where it was all pre-paid and we got salary, so it didn’t matter if I saw three patients or 30 patients. There was no incentive to see more patients.

At Amy’s med school graduation

At the time, I was way more productive than, to be honest, some of my colleagues because the incentive was to not work. You got your salary, your benefits, and your vacation time, whether you didn’t see anybody or whether you saw a bunch of patients. I was, professionally, I was trained at Ohio State and had a certain work ethic which is take care of patients. I would see my patients at any time, if they were sick, I wanted them to come in. I was always busy. I was practicing the same medicine. It didn’t matter if it was pre-paid. For me, it was just take care of patients and advocate for them. When that compensation system went away, when the HMOs all went kaput, we had to reinvent ourselves as a fee-for-service group. Half of our physicians quit. They didn’t all do it on day one. But we had, at our peak, in internal medicine, I think we had 13 doctors and they all left except for two. At one time, I made a list and I had something like 24 doctors who had come and left, just from my own building. Why’d they quit? Many left because the new compensation system was based on productivity and had no paid vacation. They went other places. I had the privilege of learning from great clinicians and teachers, truly inspirational figures. That has inspired me throughout the decades of my career. I’ve kept the same principles from my start in Ohio to what I do now. So I think the thing that I’m proudest of as far as that is just that I’ve maintained the same attitude toward patient care regardless of anything else. I really have. Your values mean everything. —MARTY

Accepting the Fellowship honor in New Orleans

With Kelley Brennan in Columbus

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At Baby Lab

Wendy teaching preschool.

Wendy and Marsha Erickson at their graduation party.

Wendy celebrates with Connie Hutcheson and mother Leah.

The new Rollins graduate poses with Amy and Michelle.

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CAREERS

Counselor for All W E N D Y F O L L O W E D U P H E R T E A C H I N G C A R E E R B Y G O I N G B A C K T O S C H O O L T O B E C O M E A FA M I LY C O U N S E L O R

I had always wanted to be a teacher. I loved children. When I was at Ohio State, I majored in elementary education and minored in early childhood and childhood literature. In Ohio, I taught for three years and that was the plan, because then I could get pregnant when Marty finished medical school. My first job was as a teacher at Leewood Elementary School. Once we had our own kids, I had the luxury of being on their schedule. I enjoyed that. I did that off and on for all the years Michelle and Amy were in preschool and early elementary. When we moved to Florida, I got to pursue being a mental health counselor. My hero at that time was Dr. Joyce Brothers, who was a psychologist. I’d watch her on TV and read her books. I always thought it would be great to be her. I had been teaching preschool at the Jewish Community Center and at Sweetwater Oaks Nursery School. I also started teaching parenting classes at Seminole Community College. I loved that. I really got into the parenting aspect. What I liked most about those classes was when, at the end of the class, a parent would come up to me and say, “You know, I have some questions about my marriage,” or “I’m feeling depressed. I’m not quite sure what to do about it.” I was happy to talk to them, but I realized I was really not qualified and I thought, this is what I want to do. I made the decision to go back to school based on that. This is really what I wanted to do, but I was very nervous. I started the master’s program at Rollins College when I turned forty. It was a big deal. It ended up being the best thing I ever did in my life, other than marrying Marty and having kids. I loved

“

was there. He could hear crying, screaming, fighting through the walls. Those were big emotions I dealt with in my clients, but it rarely got to me. I had a hard time with some clients struggling with illness. I lost a couple clients over the years. But I enjoyed the challenge. I usually saw progress. And I enjoyed the constant learning that I had to do to make sure that I could keep up with my clients. I liked to get right in there with them. I just —WENDY didn’t have a hard time with it. I always felt so passionately about what I was doing. It was stressful at times but I met so many wonderful people over the every minute of being in school there. I did very, very years doing it. There were a lot of success stories and well. As Marty says, I was the star of my class, and I did I got a lot of positive feedback. It was very fulfilling. well in every course except statistics, which I didn’t I loved what I did, but because of health issues, it ace like everything else. was getting pretty difficult. I retired at age 61, which I did some bold things while I was there. I worked was much sooner than I had planned to. When I reat a suicide hotline for a year and it was downtown and tired I missed the work horribly and I was very disI had to train for that and I learned a lot while I was satisfied but committed to reinventing myself. there. I did an internship for a year. Before I retired, I started working at Brain Fitness, When I graduated, I opened my own private practice, which is a group dedicated to working with people who one of only three students in my whole class who went are in the early stages of Alzheimer’s disease. I reinto their own practice. And I loved every minute of be- ally found my niche there. I feel very connected and ing in practice. I never had to advertise. I had about five it keeps my brain active as well. clients follow me from my internship. And from there, My friend Marlene has been singing in Central Florit was word of mouth. I also started doing parenting ida Community Arts Choir. I had never sung before, but lectures at various churches, at the JCC, taught parent- she encouraged me to join. I now take voice lessons and ing classes based on my friend Marge Nelson’s program. piano lessons. We put on three shows a year. We also do I had a couple offices. I was in Maitland, then Long- community service, so a group of us sing at Brain Fitwood, then I moved to Marty’s office building. I had ness. I recently sang for a group of special needs young the office right next door to his. Marty and I saw each adults. I’m happy I found both outlets. They’ve really other passing in the hall. It was great knowing he helped me feel productive and gratified. —WENDY

I always felt so passionately about what I was doing. It was very fulfilling.”

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CAREERS

People’s Cover Girl M I C H E L L E B E C A M E T H E S TA R W R I T E R O F T H E M A G A Z I N E T H AT B O T H S H E A N D W E N D Y L O V E D

Ready to start her Time Inc. career.

Marty moving Michelle to New York City in 1997.

I never had any preconceived notions about what either of the kids would do for their careers. I knew when she was in elementary school that Michelle was writing and enjoying it, and I knew she was good with language. I guess I knew in high school, Michelle never talked about wanting to be a teacher, wanting to be in business, wanting to be in health care. My thought was always, “Michelle will

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Her first of nearly 200 cover stories.

do whatever she wants to do and be good at it and make the right decision.” Whenever she made that known that she wanted to be a writer, my response would have been that she’d be good at it. At the University of Florida, she really was on another level from the other students. And she had such a love of magazines. When she earned her internship at Time magazine, we

knew she was on her way. It was thrilling to see her in New York when she was interning at Time in the summer of 1996. She seemed like a natural, the opposite of a fish out of water. I knew she loved New York City. I hoped and prayed we hadn’t lost her forever from Florida. We got very lucky she came back. Michelle has always been so savvy and so with it in addition to being

bright and talented. Once I saw her there, I knew she could handle it and she did, beautifully. And then again, the writing part and her talent and experience, I just never had any doubts. Just like Michelle, I still enjoy reading People. Ever since I read it to her when she was a baby, I’ve enjoyed getting it every week and relaxing with it. Even if Michelle wasn’t a star there, I’d read it. I love People. —wendy

“She showed her potential early on,” Marty says of Michelle, here at Time Inc. headquarters in Manhattan. “I admire so much what she can do with her talent and what she has accomplished.”

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“When the three of us worked in the same medical building, we didn’t necessarily see each other all the time,” Wendy says, “but it just felt very nice. My clients would come in and see the Derrow Dermatology sign and say, ‘Is that your daughter upstairs? And is that your husband next door?’”

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CAREERS

New Doc on the Block F O L L O W I N G I N M A R T Y ’ S F O O T S T E P S , A M Y S H I N E S A S A B R I L L I A N T D E R M AT O L O G I S T

Amy’s first patient: Michelle.

Packed up for med school.

Visiting Wake Forest medical school.

When she was little, Amy showed interest in being a doctor that maybe in retrospect we could recognize now. But it wasn’t until she was in high school that she really started pointing to a career in medicine. I didn’t nudge either her or Michelle along a certain path. I never told them what to do. I certainly gave Amy encouragement when she decided she was interested. No question. I was there to give her

advice and encouragement, but she made those decisions, to go on to medical school at Wake Forest and to pursue dermatology. I did my internship in Cincinnati where Amy did her whole residency. She’s so smart, she could have done anything. She could have been a neurosurgeon. But Amy loves the skin. You have to have an artist’s eye to cut on people, to make it look good.

That’s also a great field to go into for a work-life balance. Having Amy go into medicine and then vicariously reliving being a medical student, going through residency, talking to her and visiting sometimes, that alone was a wonderful experience for me to see that and be there part of that time as she was going through what I went through. It’s a shared experience. We’re colleagues. That was great and then having her

come back and practice upstairs in the same medical building that Wendy and I have practiced in and have her as a true colleague, literally. We share patients. We talk about our work and what each of us is striving to do for our patients. That has been and will be until I retire a special kind of relationship and one of the highlights of my professional career. Not many doctors get to do that. —marty

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Wendy and little Tillie

On a family trip circa 1968, Pat and the girls took in the splendor of the American West.

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NEXT GENERATION The girlsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; weddings set the stage for the next chapter, including a bonanza of Florida grandchildren

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Michelle’s Wedding T H E B I G D AY W A S A B R E E Z E . T H E E A R LY C O U R T S H I P W A S N O T

Wendy and Michelle open gifts at the bridal shower.

WENDY: Early on when Michelle was dating Chris, there

you grill your daughter about a new boyfriend, it’s not was only one bad moment. It was when we met this new obligatory that your daughter should cry … but I think boyfriend Chris when we were visiting Michelle in New it should be close. I think it’s a little bit of a caveman York. We were questioning Michelle when she, Marty thing. I believe that the husband-to-be almost needs to and I went to see The Lion King on Broadway. She said come in and hit somebody over the head and cart off the if you trust me you should know that he could be the daughter. I think there has to be a little tension there person I’m going to marry. about whether this is the right guy because I didn’t know this “Chris” guy. We had only just met him at the MARTY: As a parent, for your kid, if you embrace a per- Vinegar Factory over French toast. fect stranger right off the bat and without any hesitation or questions, you’re not doing your job. I admit, when WENDY: Once Marty worked through his fatherly du-

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At the rehearsal dinner, Michelle marked her last night as a Derrow.

ties, everything went much smoother and we loved seeing how Michelle’s relationship with Chris blossomed. And of course, they did get engaged. Leading up to the wedding, I felt comfortable with Chris from the beginning. As Marty quickly came around, it was just a pleasure the more we got to know Chris, the more we spent time together. I was very, very touched and it was completely unexpected when he converted to Judaism. I felt like that was a gift to Marty and I, even though it was a decision between Chris and Michelle.

Walking down the aisle at Leu Gardens in Orlando on Feb. 20, 2000.

MARTY: The wedding was the easy party. I don’t remem-

remember going to the paper shop and sitting and or- leading up to the wedding, including French friends Pasber stressing over it at all. Michelle and Wendy worked dering invitations, and I remember thinking, we’re kind cale and Samuel coming to the wedding. We had good out a lot of the details, and everyone was so easy with of on the same wave length here and this is fun. weather. Rabbi Merrill Shapiro did the ceremony. We what we all wanted to do. Once we had the venue selecthave a long history with him, and that was very special. ed, Leu Gardens, I think it was pretty straightforward. MARTY: All of it was exactly like Father of the Bride with It was really a pleasure. Steve Martin. Basically your job is to just sign the check. MARTY: For my toast at the reception, I struggled ahead You really don’t participate very much. When they’re of time and just threw everything out. I remember I WENDY: With the wedding, something shifted with talking about the colors, you might throw in a sugges- talked to Merrill about, telling him I was having a hard Michelle and me. I’ll always be her mother, she’s my tion, it’s irrelevant. time and wanted to come up with something special. daughter, but I think it was probably a little bit of the His advice was to just speak from the heart. That’s what beginning of a friendship. It became very clear, I can WENDY: Then it was just one good thing after another I did. That’s what this day was about.

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The Rabbi

MER R I L L SH A P I RO

“Merrill was a longtime friend who we knew way back in our Columbus days,” Marty says. “He and his family moved to Florida before we did. It was so amazing that he did Michelle’s wedding.”

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Parents of the Bride M A RTY A N D W E NDY

“Michelle was nervous that morning because it looked like it might rain and the roses had all been cut back,” Wendy says. “But the ceremony was beautiful and the sun shined.”.

“

Chris was the first addition to our family in a long time. We couldn’t have been happier that day.” —MARTY

The new Michelle Tauber with her family.

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“

I just love how my mother is holding Michelle’s hand. The day meant so much to all of us.” —WENDY

Three generations of the Wandler/Derrow women.

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The Toast

FATHER OF T H E BRI D E

“Michelle’s wedding was right before the era of everyone shooting videos of everything, so what I said is only a memory,” Marty says. “But I spoke from the heart.”

Father-Daughter Dance M A RTY A N D M IC HELLE

“Seeing Michelle so beautiful, so glowing, so happy, that’s what I’ll always remember about this dance,” Marty says. “She was ready to start her life with Chris.”.

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Heading down the aisle with Amy at 足ChampionsGate in Orlando on Nov. 12, 2011.

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NEXT GENERATION

Amy’s Wedding A N I G H T T O R E M E M B E R A S A M Y A N D J O N AT H A N C E L E B R AT E D T H E I R N E W B E G I N N I N G

The rehearsal dinner with Vic.

MARTY: The first time we had Jonathan over, it was New

that makes her so special, from her brilliant mind to her Year’s Eve and I was making my annual lobsters, drop- caring for others to even her love of Battlestar Galactica. ping them unwittingly into a boiling pot. With Michelle, When Jonathan proposed as a surprise at Amy’s office, my fatherly protection was in overdrive and I had been she was really elated. hard on her in the early days with Chris. But with Amy, I had mellowed by then. I hope I didn’t make Jonathan as MARTY: Amy had a real vision for what her wedding uncomfortable as those lobsters that first night. He was with Jonathan could be. She knew the colors she Jewish, a lawyer, a sci-fi fan and a great match for Amy. wanted, the type of DJ, the setting at ChampionsGate. It was all her and Jonathan. On the big day, Amy was WENDY: Amy was so happy with Jonathan. She found practically floating, walking on cloud nine. She and someone she could laugh with and share everything Jonathan could have danced all night.

Amy and Jonathan on wedding eve.

WENDY: My cousins came—Harley and Bev and Barbara.

It was so good to see them. Marty’s brother Philip and his wife came. But Amy’s wedding was more of an event for the next generation. My mother had passed, and my brother doesn’t travel. Michelle’s children were now old enough to be part of the ceremony, with Tillie as the flower girl, of course. MARTY: The wedding was a big moment for many rea-

sons. Sure we had had an empty nest for a while, but now Amy was married in a new life with Jonathan.

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The Ringbearers LOU AND VI C

“The boys tried to play it cool, but they were nervous,” Wendy says. “Frankie couldn’t control the, um, butterflies and didn’t make the ceremony but put in an appearance at the reception.”

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Mr. and Mrs. Witt

J O N ATH A N A N D AMY

“Rabbi Kay from our synagogue performed the ceremony,” Marty says. “It was all very lovely. Kids and friends from both families stood alongside Amy and Jonathan.”

“

Amy had the perfect wedding. We were so very happy for her and Jonathan.” —MARTY

Marty and Wendy surrounded by their daughters and sons-in-law.

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“

The family looked terrific for the big event. And the smiles on the dance floor were priceless.” —WENDY

Marty and Wendy with the Taubers.

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Jonathan and Amy set the tone for a night of dancing at the reception.

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Holding baby Vic at South Seminole Hospital in Longwood on November 9, 2002.

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NEXT GENERATION

Vic Adam Tauber T H E F I R S T G R A N D C H I L D K I C K E D O F F A H A P P Y E R A F O R T H E N E W G R A N D PA R E N T S

The tough labor

Delivery by Marty

First coo

The new parents

Three generations

A kiss from Grandma

We were so excited when Michelle told us she was pregnant. To be honest, it’s weird to see your daughter get married and then to see her be pregnant and then to see her getting ready to have a baby. It’s a real evolution in how you relate to one another. Michelle went on to have four children, and I remember every one of those births. We were so excited that she and Chris had just moved down to Orlando from New York. But then to be able to participate in Vic’s delivery was such a complete shock. The obstetrician, my partner Roy Raphael, just came up and MARTY:

informed me that I was doing this. I had a camera, as “Don’t drop them because they’re slippery.” It was great. weird as it was to have a camera in the delivery room, It was a thrill. It was the first grandchild and every mobut I had a camera there and I was like, “No, I’m taking ment of it was just burnt in our brains, just the finest, photos.” Dr. Raphael countered, “You’re delivering. It’s most wonderful, happiest moment we can remember. cool with Michelle.” I think Michelle at that time would It was the best. have been cool if the janitor delivered the baby. She wanted the pain to end. Get it out of me. Dr. Raphael WENDY: It was magic, fabulous. It’s a cliché, ,but I thank said, “It’s fine. You’ve got to do it.” G-d everyday for our family and for these grandkids. We It’s a life experience. I did exactly what I was told to don’t ever take it for granted. do: “Stand here, put your hands here and don’t drop the baby because they’re slippery.” That’s what he told me: MARTY: It’s been such a wonderful gift for us. It’s a

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Super Vic at his first photo shoot

With Uncle Alan in Columbus

onderful gift to have grandkids and to have them live w so close to us. WENDY: It is, and they are fabulous kids. Michelle and

Chris have done such a great job. I’ve been very grateful with the names. I still can’t believe we have a grandson named Vic. That was a real gift too. They are all named after great people, but when Michelle and Chris said his name was Vic, oh my God, it’s priceless. We started family dinners on Sunday nights and would have Michelle, Chris and Vic over while Marty

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With Grandma and Great Grandma Leah

Riding on Grandpa

cooked. Sometimes they’d come over earlier and go swimming, with Vic loving the water. We had the chance to go with them to Columbus and introduce Vic to my brother and mother. She never said anything about his name, but I know it meant a lot to her. That photo of me and my mother with little Vic just shows how life keeps moving on and you have to do the most with the time you’re given.

With Aunt Amy

was just this new baby a short time ago. At his first birthday, we thought he had grown up fast, walking around in a little tie and suspenders. WENDY: There have been so many of those little mile-

stones. The first time we took Vic to Disney World, the first time he slept over at our house, the first time Marty bought him a bike—all of it adds up to a childhood that goes very fast.

MARTY: Speaking of that, looking at these pictures, you

see how fast the time goes. It really does seem that Vic

MARTY: He’s getting older, getting taller. He’s almost as

Watching a Disney parade

At Vic’s first birthday

The family in Columbus

First birthday cake

Swimming at Grandma and Grandpa’s

tall as I am now and his true self is really coming out. He’s so great. He’s going to be such a wonderful young man and you just see it. You hear it in his voice. He’s calm. The kid had a lot of issues to work out in his brain; he wanted to be a teenager when he was a toddler. Michelle and Chris said when they came home with little brother Lou and suddenly Vic wasn’t the only kid in the house, he gritted his teeth at this new little baby and grudgingly said, “Hi, Lou.” That’s all normal. Vic is so great. He’s just a wonderful young man. He’s going to be the best. They’ll all be

Third birthday guitar

great. Vic, we’re all going to be just so thrilled with him when he’s all grown up. Next up for him is the bar mitzvah. We’ve all gone through it. I survived it. Michelle and Amy survived it. He’ll do great. And then every two years after that we’ll have another one, another one, another one. And someday, I’ll take them to the Grand Canyon. If Amy and I could do it twice, Vic can climb down, climb back up, have that wonderful rush of accomplishment. That’s an experience I would absolutely love to share with him. It’s the best feeling.

WENDY: We could go on and on about each one. Each

one is so special. I started going to help Michelle on Thursdays at her house when Vic was a baby. Being with the kids is one of those real joys. We’ve gone to brunch, to Bosphorous on Park Avenue, to so many movies. I can see why people love being grandparents. You get to do the fun stuff. Seriously, we could go on and on. Vic kicked off a chapter in our lives that has meant the world to us. We just soak it in and enjoy every step, from the baby years to the elementary era and now, with Vic, well beyond.

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Vic and Grandpa share a shake at Steak ’n’ Shake.

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Vic and Grandma share a smile at Vicâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s first birthday.

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Ice cream in Mount Dora

At the local playground in Winter Park

With Amy and Mimi (featured on the cover of a medical journal!)

Graduating Pre-K at the JCC

Little-kid curls

“

Vic is a special kid, so ready to be grown up. I’ve had to steal as many hugs from him as I can.” —WENDY

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First of many bikes from Grandpa

Happy and handsome

A boy and his bug

Silly with Dad

Growing up fast

Ready for lacrosse

“

He has so much going for him. I know Vic will become a superstar with anything he wants to do in his life.” —MARTY

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One year, it was just Wayne and the boys. Then came love...

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Marty outfitting Vic with the Harley-Davidson look.

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NEXT GENERATION

Lou Aaron Tauber THE BIG GUY WITH THE BIG HE ART M ADE FOR T WO GR ANDSONS IN A ROW

Michelle’s baby shower

Ready for delivery

The honorary obstetrician

Vic, the big brother

With the little big man

A grandma again

MARTY: When Michelle told us she was pregnant again,

we were ecstatic. And then when we found out it was another boy, we couldn’t believe it. How different from our family with the two girls. Boys are so different, so rough and tumble, so fun. WENDY: With Lou, we were fortunate again to be with

Michelle for the whole experience. Chris’ grandfather Lou was about to pass away but held on long enough to hear the news that the next Lou Tauber was born. His grandfather died the next day. An amazing circle of life.

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MARTY: Like with Vic, Lou’s name meant so much. And

speak as early as Vic, who was very verbal at like seven again, I was given the responsibility of the delivery, this months or something. Lou was always appraising the time by my colleague Dr. Bob Bowles. Again, I didn’t situation. He was always taking it in. You could see the drop the slippery baby. Lou was a big guy from the be- intelligence behind his eyes, that he was observing and ginning. He’s going to be much taller than all of us. taking in everything going on around him and then he was always very much paying attention. And he was so, WENDY: When I think of Lou, I think of hugs. Lou gives so easy to get a smile out of. Such a sweetheart. the best hugs. If my mom were here, she’d say she wants to take a bite out of Lou. He’s that kind of kid. WENDY: There is so much more to Lou than just his huggability. Like all the kids, he’s so smart, so caring, such a MARTY: Here’s how I remember little Lou; Lou didn’t joy to be around. And yes, I could hug him all day.

Lou arrived more than two weeks early, on February 1, 2005 at South Seminole Hospitalâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;weighing a sturdy 8 pounds, 6 ounces.

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The growing family on Mother’s Day, 2005

Welcoming the year 2006

Jewish brothers at Passover

Another Harley fan

With Grandpa on Park Avenue

“

Baby Lou had those kissable cheeks and that cheery way about him. I couldn’t get enough.” —WENDY

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Grandma’s glasses

With Tigger at Disney

The family, including Mimi

Lou’s first birthday

Little swimmers

Thomas

Mom and son

“

Lou and Vic reminded me of Amy and Michelle. Alike in some ways, sure, but then so very different too.” —MARTY

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Doing what Grandma loves best with Lou.

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The brothers, happy to be together.

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On a walk through Mead Gardens

Those cheeks

Silly brothers

Grandma’s day out

Lunch with Aunt Amy and Grandma

“

As he’s gotten older, Lou has remained as sweet as sugar. I still want to eat him up.” —WENDY

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Stealing a hug

Conquering “Everest” at Disney

At Animal Kingdom with Lou the animal lover

Happiest place on earth (though Vic seems to disagree)

Hula-hoop master

At Lou’s 9th birthday

“

Lou is the guy I want with me if I get into a fight at a biker bar. He’s so strong, but he’d also stand by you no matter what.” —MARTY

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Lou Tauber, All-American Boy

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Baby Frank, born with a full head of hair on July 19, 2007, at Winnie Palmer Hospital in Orlando.

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NEXT GENERATION

Frank Clark Tauber A T H I R D B O Y M A K E S H I S ( L O U D ! ) D E B U T— A N D K E E P S H I S P A R E N T S O N T H E I R T O E S

Michelle and little Frank

The labor pros

Grandparents three times over

Proud Grandpa

Surprisingly calm newborn

MARTY: Wendy and I had wanted to have three kids, but

with Wendy’s health, we held at two. So when Michelle told us she was pregnant again, well, what a blessing. I remember Chris being 100 percent sure that it would be a girl.

MARTY: I remember Frank not being the easiest baby in

Lou and Vic meet Frank

My cousin Frank the pediatrician, Frank’s namesake, would have said let him cry. He gave that advice to me with Amy. I asked how long I should let her cry. He said, “Until she throws up.” He was smart. He knew that there are some times you can’t comfort every kid. You can only do so much. At some point, they just have to comfort themselves.

WENDY:

the beginning. It’s a good thing he was so cute. That’s when Chris and Michelle had the thousand-yard stare. It was after, like, eight months of no sleep thanks to Frank, all while still chasing around, literally chasing around Vic and Lou. We went over once and the Tauber WENDY: I went to the sonogram ready to pull out the parents were just catatonic. I don’t think they’d eaten in pink booties. But wait a minute, this was going to be days. I told Wendy, “G-d Almighty, we have to go cook.” another boy, three in a row! Amazing. As polite and la- I made dinner right away at their house, beef stew or MARTY: Frank has become a great kid, precocious and dylike as Michelle was when she was a little girl, I never something. They had had no sleep night after night af- smart as a whip, fearless. Very physical, very fearless. thought she’d one day have a house of three boys. ter night. Frank was just up forever. He’s tireless, still doesn’t have to sleep.

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Eye to eye with baby Frank

The brothers three

With Aunt Amy

Wendy’s birthday, a week after Frank’s

Soothing Frank at his bris

“

Michelle’s house of three little boys became a very happy, very fun and, yes, very loud place. You wouldn’t want it any other way.” —MARTY

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The little elf

Atop Dad

His little froggy hat and biker-tattoo shirt

With Grandma

Frank’s first birthday

Loving on Mimi

“

Frank was a charmer from the beginning. That hair, those eyes — he has a real X factor.” —WENDY

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Wendy enjoys the Park Avenue rose garden with little Frank.

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Frank with his favorite dish from Grandpa: farm-fresh bacon.

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Playing with superheroes

At Gaylord Palms for Wendy’s 60th birthday

On the Taubers’ playground, a gift from Wendy and Marty

At Azalea park

Happy swimmer

“

As Frank got bigger, those three boys became a unit. When they’re out exploring the world, they’re inseparable.” —MARTY

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Grandparents’ day out

Face No. 364

Charming the ladies

A day of “Grandma Camp”

Face No. 732

At Frank’s 6th birthday

“

Not since Amy was little have I seen a kid with so many faces. Frank is the man of 1,000 expressions.” —WENDY

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One year, it was just Wayne and the boys. Then came love...

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Frank runs with Mimi in the Taubersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; backyard

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NEXT GENERATION

Tillie Rose Tauber A L I T T L E G I R L I S T H E S W E E T F O U R T H A D D I T I O N T O M I C H E L L E ’ S FA M I LY

In labor one last time

Pink baby girl

Delivery man Chris

The happiest grandma

Rosy Tillie

The proud parents

I am so in love with the boys that I thought when Michelle said she was pregnant for the fourth time, if they had another boy, it would just be more wonderful. I of course adored our daughters, so I knew the joy of having a girl. When Tillie was born, there was no losing. Another boy would have been fabulous, but a baby girl is so special. I knew the benefits for Michelle as a mom of having a daughter. I’m so enjoying watching Tillie develop as the youngest with three brothers because it’s very different than Michelle and Amy. It’s fun. She’s amazing.

WENDY:

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MARTY: The dynamic between the four of them is so

great. She’ll be very well adjusted with guys because she’s had three older brothers. She knows the score and she’s very sure of herself. Did I ever picture Michelle as the mother of four children? You have an image in your mind about what you think your kids are going to do, what they’ll do for a living, what kinds of adults they’ll be, who they’ll marry. But the truth is, you don’t have a clue. I didn’t have any idea that Michelle would be such a natural as a mother, but once she got started, she really loved

it. She loves having a big family at home, and the more she had the kids and guided their growth, the more obvious it was that she was really in her element. I couldn’t have predicted that. That’s part of the reason I keep cooking dinner Sunday nights, because I just love having all this life around, love it, love it, love it. The dinners we’ve had at our house with our daughters, our sons-in-law, all of our grandkids have been the most enjoyable evenings. We’re just all of us sitting around the table, hanging out, joking, laughing. It’s the best.

Holding Tillie Rose Tauber, born April 29, 2009, at Winnie Palmer Hospital in Orlando.

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Eye to eye with Tillie

Wendy and her girls

The complete Tauber family

Quiet moment

“

Little-girl curls

Tillie was so unique as this new, tiny baby girl. But she fit alongside her big brothers right from the start.” —MARTY

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Happy little Till

Chris and the pink puff

With the family at Houston’s

Silly with Grandma

Tillie’s first birthday

Mom and daughter

“

The boys are wonderful, but with Tillie, I could finally shop for poofy dresses, pink bows for a little girl I call ‘Cookie.’” —WENDY

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Tillie plays with Grandpa during Sunday night dinner.

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Tillie celebrates with the original Derrow girls at Amyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s wedding.

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Soaking up the Florida summer

With Chris on Park Avenue

At Tillie’s 2nd birthday party (the royal wedding day!)

Little princess

First bike from Grandma and Grandpa

“

I see glimpses of our early life with Michelle and Amy when we’re with Tillie. But she’s so much her own person already.” —MARTY

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Dressed up for Grandma

Off to preschool

Biking around the block

From toddler to little girl

Comparing manis with Grandma

Gathering for Sunday dinner

“

I have never, ever seen a girl like Tillie. She’s not a tomboy. She’s not a princess. And yet she’s all of that and more.” —WENDY

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Tillie and Grandma sing a duet at the piano.

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NEXT GENERATION

The Namesakes M I C H E L L E A N D C H R I S N A M E D E A C H C H I L D A F T E R A B E L O V E D R E L AT I V E

Vic

VIC TO R WA N D L E R A N D VIC TAUB E R

“This was a real gift to the memory of my father,” Wendy says. “He would have loved so much to know Michelle’s kids. The name Vic has helped keep his spirit alive.”

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Lou

LO UIS TAUB E R A N D LO U TAU BER

“Chris’s grandfather Lou was so special to his family and we had the privilege of seeing him a few times,” Marty says. “His sweet nature lives on in Lou.”

Frank Tillie

F RA N K KUL L E R A N D F RA N K TAUB E R

TILLIE GREENSTEIN AND TILLIE TAUBER

“Barbara Kuller was my closest cousin, “Tillie was one of my mom’s sisters and Barand her husband, Frank, was a prince. A bara’s mother,” Wendy says. “The name genuine prince,” Wendy says. “He was a has such a perfect bounce to it, I couldn’t pediatrician with such a huge heart.” imagine Tillie with any other name.”

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On the cruise deck just after boarding

At the Pirates of the Caribbean ship

Books in the double berth

THE DISNEY CRUISES The grandparents treated the kids to the happiest place on the seaâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;twice Vic and Lou stepping off in the Bahamas.

A sunset walk

With Chip and Dale

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Belle and Princess Tillie

A shore excursion at Disney’s private island

Unlimited ice cream

“ We just had so much fun

On the Caribbean

with Vic and Lou, we had to take Frank and Tillie, too.” —WENDY

With Captain America 219

Marty’s homemade chicken dinner on the deck overlooking the Smoky Mountains.

“ My dream was to spend

time together exploring the North Carolina mountains with our grandkids.” —MARTY Michelle and Chris 220

Knitting time

Rafting on the Nantahala River

Hiking with Lou

NORTH CAROLINA CABIN

The cherrypit contest

Marty and Wendy find the perfect retreat for rafting, hiking and cherry-pit spittinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Nature man Vic

Frank exploring

Tillie at the cabin entrance 221

Grandpaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s biscuits and grits

The second summer conquering the Nantahala.

Homemade pizza for a special dinner

Tillieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s first horseback ride

Bonkers for mountain biking

Climbing the mud wall

Frankâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s snake

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The family at Deep Creek waterfall

Relaxing at the campfire

“ We booked the cabin

Tillie’s daddy longlegs, Rosy

a second time, and it was even better. Horses, snakes, s’mores and biscuits!” —WENDY

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View from the cabin, with “Group Hug” s’mores T-shirts designed by Lou.

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Thanksgiving with the whole family outside the red barn

To the chicken coop with Grandma

THE GEORGIA FARM The Hundred-Acre Farm became a tradition for fall and winter family time Piggyback hike with Tillie

Bundled up in the woods 226

Storyteller Vic

Fried chicken

Marty-made pizza dinner

Cameo by Amy and Jonathan’s collie

The rocket crew

“We have liftoff!”

“ You wake up to roosters

crowing and cows roaming. It’s like being in a movie about the perfect farm.” —MARTY Frank on the tire swing

Muddy Lou 227

“

Mimi grew so big. Even though I always wanted a small dog, we loved her to pieces.”— W E N D Y

Mimi and Wendy at a party for the standard poodles in Mimi’s pedigreed family.

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NEXT GENERATION

Parade of Pets T H E FA M I LY H A S E X P E R I E N C E D T H E B E S T, T H E W O R S T A N D T H E W E I R D W I T H T H E I R D O G S

Bonnie

Teddy

Buzzy

Tinkerbell

Mimi

STANDARD P OODLE

JACK RUSSELL TERRIER

Buzzy was a fast rescue dog. Marty was intrigued by him. Buzzy ran ruts in the backyard, just running in circles. I kept saying all I want is a chihuahua, all I want is a little dog.

I named her Tinkerbell, but I believe it was a boy. She let me hold her only because she was half dead. It was a disaster. We had to put Buzz and Tink down. We said no more dogs.

She was the smartest dog we ever had and so good with kids. She looked like she was always smiling. But Mimi had liver failure and died suddenly. It was awful. We said never again.

Our friend Joel Slaven, who trains pets for SeaWorld, found Olive. Marty’s crazy about her. I don’t know that we’ll ever be without a dog. I wouldn’t mind having a cat.—WENDY

GREAT DANE

DACHSHUND

Bonnie was big, and she The girls loved Teddy. We wasn’t obeying. The vet took him to the beauty said the dog was deaf. shop to get his hair and That wasn’t safe with the nails done. When Teddy kids. We did find somedied at 17 of old age, it was one with a farm to take so painful. Marty and I said Bonnie. A real farm. Really. no more dogs.

WHIPPET

CHIHUAHUA (SORT OF )

6 Olive

229

Wendy and Marty ready to celebrate with friends.

On a family trip circa 1968, Pat and the girls took in the splendor of the American West.

230

40 YEARS AND COUNTING Four decades into their grand love story, the onetime high-school sweethearts are ready for the next chapter

231

THE CELEBRATION

A Lifetime of Love F R O M T E E N A G E R S T O G R A N D P A R E N T S , W E N D Y A N D M A R T Y H AV E A LW AY S E M B R A C E D T H E J O U R N E Y—T O G E T H E R

Ready for the prom

MARTY: I think you get very wrapped up when you’re

raising a family and worrying about all the things you have to do, about making a living, you worry about your kids, you worry about providing for them and that they make good choices in their lives. Then, as you get older you start worrying a little bit about your health because you have to face reality when things become a little bit more difficult sometimes. But I think as we’re entering this time of our lives right now, the important thing is not to worry about most of that stuff when you don’t have to and to just be in the moment and realize that a

232

Ready for date night

lot of what we worry about on a day-to-day basis, in the big picture of life, is really not very important. My mother said over and over, “As long as they’re healthy. As long as they’re healthy.” She really taught me the importance of remembering that. Don’t project. Don’t futurize. That’s about letting it be. And be a good role model. Don’t think to yourself, “If I don’t do this, I’m not going to get this. Put your blinders on and run your own race. Live your own movie. That’s let it be; being a good role model.

WENDY:

MARTY: I’m still obsessing about trying to do all those

little things that are important but at the end of the day if you can get those things in order, it’s not really what you care about. You don’t get pleasure out of it. You get pleasure out of each other, relationships with each other and having a wonderful relationship with a wonderful wife and being fortunate enough to live in each other’s lives, share in each other’s lives. If you’re not getting older, you’re dead so hopefully you’re getting a little wiser and hopefully getting a little closer to knowing what’s important in life.

Traveling for a trip out west.

A look for Wendy.

A look for Marty.

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1971: First blush

1997: Machismo II

1972: Quizzical

1986: Biting into life

1998: The Jack Nicholson

1974: Machismo

1975: Strong in adversity

1995: Stone-cold killah

1999: Mr. Florida 1999

2009: The Travis Bickle

1980: Winter Grizzly

1996: Bromance

2014: “What, Me Worry?”

THE MANY FACES OF MARTY The even-keeled doctor and steady father figure surprisingly has more expressions than anyone

234

1969: The Beehive

1971: Summer Fun

1982: Autumn Bounce

1983: The Mom Perm, Tight

1989: Casual Wave

1991: Bat Mitzvah Highlights

1975: The Mom Cut

1984: Frosted Halloween

1998: Florida Life

1978: The Blowout Mom Cut

1987: The Mom Perm, Relaxed

2009: The Parisian

1979: The Date Night

2012: Perfection

THE MANY HAIRSTYLES OF WENDY The evolution represents subtle changes over the years, culminating in the best ’do ever

235

1972

1 975

1 98 3

BEST FRIENDS FOR LIFE From their teen years to their grandparent years, Marty and Wendy have always had each other 1994

2 006 236

1 9 96

20 07

2008

201 0

2009

201 2

“ When I met Wendy, a life together like this was beyond my dreams.” —MARTY

2 01 4

201 4 237

Disney marathon

Enjoying adult daughters

Amy and Michelle at Wendyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 60th birthday party

238

Celebrating at Sunday night dinner

“ We are so blessed to have this beautiful family.” —WENDY

Michelle and Chris

Jonathan and Amy

Happy father

239

WHAT WE’VE LEARNED Enjoy your relationships and how fortunate you are to share in each other’s lives. You never know the end of the story, so you have to stay open. Be in the moment. A lot of what we worry about is not important in the big picture of life. As you get older, savor getting wiser about life. If you’re healthy, you probably have everything you need to be happy. Just let it be.

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“Our eyes light up, our

hearts warm when we’re with the people who mean everything to us.” — M A RT Y & W E N DY