Menopause Life Magazine (Summer 2021) by Menopause Life

Laughter

Is The Best Medicine Midlife Dating:

MEN TALK MENOPAUSE

Leaving Legacies For Our Children

How To Find Your Perfect Partner

SAME-SEX MARRIAGES:

Managing Painful Hips & Other Joints

What Are The Challenges?

Boost Your Collagen! ISSUE 2 Summer 2021

elcome to our

Summer edition of Menopause Life!

This issue we look at how

men view menopause, and how we can help them

understand. After all, it has an impact on all of our partners, friends, family, and even our bosses!

We discover many topics as well as gorgeous summer fashion, homeware, and garden ideas.

Education is key to getting

to grips with our symptoms,

and we owe it to ourselves to learn and better understand what we are going through. We also take a look at

how menopause at work

is changing for the better. Legislation is constantly

evolving to protect us as

menopausal employees. There's a chance to receive a free gut-health programme, and we give you more

We are excited to introduce regular writers and a

fantastic new column called

'Laughter' with Comedian; Mel Byron to add some cheerful humour.

We would love it if you could

share this magazine on your social media channels to help us spread the word.

I hope you enjoy this issue as much as I did putting it together.

Have a wonderful Summer,

and I look forward to sharing more inspiration with you in our Autumn issue.

delicious menopause-

friendly recipes for you to try at home.

Best wishes,

Ellen Harding Editor-in-Chief, Menopause Life Magazine

CONTENTS

Business Directory

Yoga Mat Chat

Curves Gyms Re-Opening Let's Talk

About Hips Men Talk

Menopause Chickpea Masala

Salmon Caesar

Refreshing Peach

Fresh Green

Collagen

Fashion

Hair Thinning

Salad

Sorbet

Smoothie

38 Symptoms May

Be Linked To Gut

Bacteria

Vaginal Dryness: Is It Still Taboo?

Menopause In The Workplace

Home & Garden

Managing

Menopausal Stress

Travel

Run Your Own Menopause

Free Training

Laughter

44 48

Business

My Early

Menopause Heartache

Dating During

Same-Sex

Inspirational

Readers' Questions

Menopause

Marriages

Woman When Sex Hurts

Business Directory Women's Fitness Club curves.eu/uk email: infouk@curves.eu

Life Cover bouncelife.co.uk email: hello@bouncelife.co.uk call: 0800 014 6781 Pelvic Health mypelvichealth.co.uk email: csm@imedicare.co.uk call: 01923 237795

Coaching katemansfield.com email: kate@katemansfield.com

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Employment Law pannonecorporate.com email: enquiries@panonnecorporate.com call: 0800 1313355

Sex Therapist - Dr. Claire Macaulay email: info@pleasurepossibility.com Click here to follow on Facebook

Reach 1.2M Incredible Women. Advertise With Us! magazine@menopauseexperts.com

Relationship Coach - Dr. Sheila French email: sheila@trainmymind.co.uk call: 0781 1357208

Gut Health thegutresetbootcamp.com email: zoe@thegutresetbootcamp.co.uk. call: 07908 774333

Physio Led Hip Programme fixyourhips.com email: victoria@fixyourhips.com

Advertising Terms Menopause Life Magazine is published every season. The Editor welcomes written contributions, which can be supplied, via email to magazine@menopauseexperts.com Opinions expressed by contributors are not necessarily those of Menopause Experts Group and does not endorse any advertisement that appears in this magazine or it’s websites. The publisher does not accept liability for loss or damage to any item or materials contributed to the magazine. No material published may be reproduced in any form without the written consent of the publisher. All advert submissions have the right to be reviewed by our design team, and will only be published if they meet design standards. All pictures, artwork and editorial contributions become the immediate copyright of the publisher and may be used in other editions or media within the Menopause Experts Group portfolio unless a written instruction is given prior to submission. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED 2021 MENOPAUSE EXPERTS GROUP LIMITED

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Yoga Mat Chat By Vicki Baumann

Let's talk about sleep, or lack of it! One of the common symptoms of perimenopause and menopause is sleeplessness. You may be familiar with the bed coverson, bed covers-off scenario throughout the night. Or waking up in a puddle of sweat. All of which can result in disturbed sleep.

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Whilst yoga can’t stop the hot sweats, it can help to relax and calm our minds prior to bedtime. And making some gentle yoga poses part of your pre-bedtime ritual can be really helpful. Here are three simple yoga poses that can help relieve tension and stress. Start by staying in the pose for a minute or two, focusing on your breath, gradually lengthening the time you spend in each pose as you feel comfortable. You may in time like to stay in the ‘Legs up the Wall’ pose for anything up to 15 minutes – it can be deeply relaxing. Make sure you are cosy and warm – after all you are preparing for bed. Have a blanket to place over yourself and, if you have one, an eye mask for the reclining poses. Inhale and exhale deeply. In through the nose, out through the nose. Close your eyes

and focus on your breath, if you find your mind wanders to other thoughts or worries, note it and bring your focus back to the breath. As with all exercise, even with such gentle relaxing poses, take any health conditions you may have into account that may be affected by having your head below your heart, or feet above your head and heart. I love working with ladies in their 40s+ who have made the decision that, as their body starts to move towards menopause, they want to be sure of keeping flexible and strong; and find ways to help reduce stress – by beginning

their yoga journey. If you keep putting off starting yoga as you are concerned you may be too inflexible – have left it too late – or are concerned you may be the ‘only one in a class that won’t know what they’re doing’ – then can I suggest you take a look at my complete beginners yoga course that is designed just for you. I absolutely love to welcome new ladies who would otherwise not consider starting yoga – to come along, learn in a supportive and friendly group and discover the many benefits to their health and wellbeing.

Standing Forward Fold (Uttanasana)

Reclining Bound Angle Pose (Supta Baddha Konasana)

Legs Up The Wall Pose (Viparita Karani)

With your feet slightly wider than hip width apart, fold forward from the hips, slowly lowering the head and arms.

Lying on your back, bring the soles of your feet together, allowing your knees to gently draw out to the sides.

This is one of my favourite poses and one I come back to time and again to relax, I hope you enjoy it too.

Bring each hand to the opposite elbow and hang in a ‘ragdoll’ position.

Rest your arms away from the body, straight with your palms facing up, fingers relaxed.

Start by sitting side-on to the wall and bending your knees to the chest, swivel round on your buttocks and stretch your legs up the wall.

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If you feel tension in your back (or suffer from lower back problems), or if your hamstrings or hips are tight, just bend your knees gently and try placing your hands on a block under your shoulders.

Find your comfortable position for your feet. It may be that you are comfortable with your feet higher towards your groin, or you may prefer to draw them longer down the mat.

This pose is great to help relieve any tension in the spine & neck and can help to calm your mind.

Make sure you are feeling no strain in your knees. You can place a pillow, cushion or rolled blanket under your knees for comfort and support. Make sure you are fully relaxed and don’t feel like you are having to ‘hold’ your legs in position.

yogawithvickib.com

This is such a relaxing pose and being so ‘open’ helps relieve stress as well as improving circulation and can be soothing during menstruation and menopause.

hello@yogawithvickib.com

Bring your buttocks as close to the wall as possible. The pose is typically performed with the legs straight up the wall, but you can explore opening out the legs to see which option you find most comfortable. If you find that your back starts to arch away from the floor, you can place a blanket under your lower back to provide support (whilst still allowing your seated bones to remain on the floor). Being an ‘inversion’ pose, it can be really beneficial for those that spend a lot of time on their feet or long periods sitting down - refreshing the legs and groin area.

Curves Gyms Re-Opening As restrictions are lifted, you'll be excited to know our women-only gyms have re-opened. As women reach 30, they become more susceptible to decreases in muscle density and increases in intramuscular fat. Consequently, lean body mass can decrease by approximately 15% between the ages of 30-80. The good news is that following a well-planned strength training program, and maintaining a balanced diet can help you overcome age-related illnesses.

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We offer a facility specially designed for women, featuring 30 minute strength training. Studies show that strength training practised over time can help prevent loss to bone density. It can also help the body create new bone. This reduces the risk of osteoporosis. Furthermore, strength training can help you increase your body mass and muscle fibre. Both of these are needed to prevent or help fight Sarcopenia, a type of muscle loss that occurs due to ageing or immobility. A healthy diet and regular exercise can reverse sarcopenia. This increases our lifespan and quality of life.

Our Curves machines feature hydraulic resistance creating a fast, safe and effective workout. Alongside a community of supportive, motivational coaches. However, you don't have to wait for menopause to start your strength training journey. When adopted early, strength training can help achieve the highest possible bone density at the premenopausal stage, keeping you ahead of the game. There is no such thing as too soon, or too late to start. Our Curves machines are designed to create long lean slender muscles, and often our gyms see 3-generations of the same family, working out together. The workout adapts to each fitness level, and coaches are always available. Research shows that regular exercise can also help balance hormones. For example; oestrogen is known to act as a regulator of muscle energy metabolism, and muscle cell viability. It does this by inserting itself into cells, (for example, muscle

membranes) to stabilise and help protect them from tearing. The good news is that following a wellplanned strength training program and a balanced diet can help you overcome agerelated illnesses.

When you keep active through strength training, you can increase the muscle fibres' size, and help mitigate negative effects. Although a healthy lifestyle does not increase oestrogen in circulation, it reduces the risk of deterioration and the development of chronic health conditions. Increased serotonin from a Curves workout can improve mood, and brain function. If there isn't a club near you then perhaps join our AtHome Workouts.

For more information on our workouts, and services please download our Curves app. Click here to download on Apple (iOS)

Click here to download on Android

Let's Talk About Hips

By Victoria Smith (BSc (Hons) Physiotherapy)

We often complain to our friends of our aches and pains but what if the pain is mostly in your hips? The problem could be Gluteal Tendinopathy.

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Ok, why on earth are we talking about hips in a Menopause magazine?

What are the usual symptoms of Gluteal Tendinopathy?

Well not only does the menopause bring on the symptoms we all recognise such as hot flushes, brain fog, headaches... (and on and on), it can also play a big part in a common hip condition called Gluteal Tendinopathy (another common term used is Trochanteric Bursitis).

The main symptom of this condition is pain felt on the outer side of your hip. This pain can often be made worse by: Lying on your side at night (hello sleepless nights!) Walking up hills and stairs (or sometimes on the flat if really irritable)

Standing on one leg, for example when getting dressed (putting pants on can be a killer!) Sitting in low chairs especially with crossed legs or knees touching together. Getting up from chairs especially during the first steps.

What causes Gluteal Tendinopathy?

Common activities that squash the tendon are sitting with legs crossed, standing with your hip out to the side and walking with a waddle. Tendons also are a little bit like Goldilocks, they like just the right amount of activity to keep them healthy. So if you don't move enoughmaybe you have a desk job, then drive home exhausted

Why does menopause affect this condition? Gluteal Tendinopathy is much more common in women than men and it is most common in peri and post-menopausal women, with 24% of women between 50 and 79 suffering from it! The reason we think this happens is all down to oestrogen. It is thought that oestrogen has a protective effect on tendons and as this reduces, the tendon becomes more prone to injury, often just with every day activities, especially if the

tendon is being squashed as we do them. It's also around this time that we start to notice weight gain. So, in an attempt to lose weight, we increase our activity levels, but a combination of less oestrogen and weak gluteal muscles can result in symptoms developing. If you've been diagnosed with this painful condition, my evidence-based program will give you lifetime access to a step by step exercise program via video, alongside an abundance of detailed ways to modify your problem activities.

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A little bit of anatomy for you.... tendons join a muscle to the bone and they hate being squashed. With Gluteal Tendinopathy the tendon that attaches the deep bottom muscles (your glutes) to your thigh bone gets squashed by a bigger, thicker tendon (Iliotibial band) that sits over the top of it. The tendon doesn't like this, so swells and becomes painful.

for a night in front of the TV- or you are the opposite and are super active - with a day spent on your feet and maybe lots of exerciseyour gluteal tendon health might start to be affected, especially if your gluteal muscles aren't very strong.

fixyourhips.com

Men Talk Menopause By Ellen Harding It's time we have a chat with men to discuss menopause, how it affects them, the people they work with and their family. I chatted with Stephen, a corporate manager.

Stephen's Story

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Stephen, head of department at a large company, was chatting to another manager over lunch when the subject of poor performance came up. A female worker had been with the company for over 20+ years. Although recently, she became less productive than she once was. Stephen suspected that she may be perimenopausal as his wife was experiencing similar symptoms. The woman was 47, calling in sick frequently, turning up late and making mistakes with data whilst at work. He talked about this with his colleague and suggested ways to help. His colleague, who was in his mid-thirties, had no idea about menopause. Though he was keen to learn and decided to approach HR.

They called the woman in and had a discussion around menopause, asking how they could make things better. They discovered the issue was irregular sleep patterns, which made it difficult to concentrate. She was given the option of flexible working hours and her performance soon improved. HR is now introducing a flexible working pattern for all employees as they develop a menopause policy. He is grateful that he was aware of what was wrong. But, had it not been for his

personal experience, he would have perhaps been less sympathetic. Stephen is keen to make sure that the menopause policy educates everyone, not just the women affected as team members need to have the knowledge too. He believes that organisations should be inclusive and loyal to their employees as their employees have been loyal to them.

I interviewed Paul, a colleague of mine, to find out how he and his wife Debs manage her sometimes debilitating osteoporosis.

Paul's Story Paul is married to Debs, who started suffering from painful osteoporosis during perimenopause. Her perimenopause started at 40, and by 48 she was post-menopausal. During this time her osteoporosis progressed. Debs talked to Paul about what she was experiencing and found groups to discuss this. She learnt that HRT could reverse the effects of osteoporosis, and after hearing this, she was willing to give it a try. She is still on HRT and believes it helped reverse some of her osteoporosis. Paul has been relieved to learn that seen through Debs' bone density scans there has been some improvement. He wishes he had been able to have an awareness of these issues before they occurred so that he could have helped his wife more. They both have to adapt to Debs' osteoporosis. She chooses to work an active job so that she stays flexible, though she has to sleep on her back for comfort. Debs continues to have injections every six months, and bone density scans every two years. Paul is supporting Debs as much as he can. He says it was a dawning of realisation for him and he is thankful that Debs was able to share her worries with him so that he

could help her. He feels that they could have practised the whole situation a little differently if education had been available and she had received treatment earlier. I had no idea what to expect, and it made me feel hopeless. I felt I should have known more, why don’t men know more?

Max's Story During the pandemic, and as the business grew, Max started helping out on the IT and Design side of things. Max is now flourishing, and a major part of the team what he has enjoyed most of all is the knowledge that he has gained by feeling part of this menopause movement.

None of my friends knew what was going on with their wives. Men need to be made more aware as it helps them become more sympathetic. It is a life stage women go through and with education men can show more understanding, and discover what's happening, and when. Men need to understand menopause every bit as much as women do. It would make us more tolerant and sympathetic. Open discussions at home really help. Men should not poohpooh menopause as 'just something women go through'. After all, if it happened to us, the women in our lives would make sure we were ok.

Currently, he works on design within Menopause Life and the development of Menopause Experts Training. Seeing his Mum create Menopause Experts Group and his own work within the company has given him a great insight into what women experience.

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Max is almost 19, and has watched his Mum Dee Murray develop Menopause Experts Group. He has of course found himself thrust into the world of women's health. Frightening for most men, let alone a teenage lad!

Recipes Every season we will bring you delicious menopause-friendly recipes that the whole family can enjoy, and that are designed to be simple to follow.

Ingredients

Chickpeas - 2 cans or 3 cups freshly cooked. Tomato - Use canned diced tomatoes for ease, or 4 – 5 ripe Tomatoes, diced. 2 Onions. Garlic - feel free to adjust the garlic to your taste. Fresh Ginger grated (again to taste) 1 tsp Cumin Seeds 2 tbsp Garam Masala (a blend of Indian spices such as coriander, cumin, cinnamon, cardamom, black pepper and cloves. It’s a wonderful blend that gives the dish so much flavor) 1 tsp Turmeric 1/2 tsp Cayenne (adjust the amount to your liking) 1 can of Coconut Milk 1/2 tube Tomato Paste Coconut Oil Salt 1 tbsp Sesame Oil A handful of chopped Fresh Coriander to serve

Method

Serves 4

Saute the onions and cumin seeds in oil until onions are a little browned around the edges.

Prep Time 10 mins

Toss in the ginger and garlic, cook for 1 to 2 minutes.

Total Time 50 mins

Stir in the spices and cook until nice and fragrant. Pour in the tomatoes and cook until they break down (this takes about 4 minutes). Add the tomato paste, chickpeas and coconut milk, cover and simmer for 25 to 30 minutes. Sprinkle it with fresh coriander and serve with rice or naan bread.

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Chickpea Masala

Salmon Caesar Salad Ingredients 4 Salmon Fillets

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CAESAR DRESSING 1 cup finely grated parmesan cheese 1 garlic clove, peeled and finely chopped 2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice 1 tsp anchovy paste or 1 to 2 anchovies, smashed and minced 1 tsp Dijon mustard 2 tsp Worcestershire sauce 1/4 cup extra-virgin olive oil 2 tbsp sour cream Salt and fresh ground black pepper BUTTER CROUTONS 2 tbsp butter 3 cups cubed day-old hearty bread SALAD 4 hard boiled eggs 2 hearts romaine lettuce, rinsed, patted dry, and roughly chopped 1/4 cup parmesan cheese shavings small pack of cherry tomatoes

Method

DRESSING Add all of the ingredients (except for the olive oil and sour cream) to a blender. Blend for 15-20 seconds, then use a spatula to scrape down the sides. Turn the blender on and let it run for another 15 to 20 seconds. As the blender is running, slowly drizzle in the olive oil. Scrape down the sides again and add in the sour cream. Let the blender run for another 15 seconds to 20 seconds until thick and creamy. CROUTONS Melt butter in a large frying pan over medium heat. When the butter begins to bubble, add bread cubes and cook, while stirring occasionally until golden brown and crisp on all sides. This will take around 5 to 8 minutes. Then lightly season with salt and pepper. Prepare and plate the salad, add the chopped egg and croutons. Grill the salmon then chop into cubes. Place the salmon on top of the salad, drizzle the dressing and add the parmesan shavings.

Salmon is rich in longchain omega-3 fatty acids, which have been shown to reduce inflammation, lower blood pressure and decrease risk factors for disease.

Serves 4 Prep Time 20 mins

Total Time 1 hour

Refreshing Peach Sorbet Emerging research has linked manuka honey with better gut health. It’s a prebiotic, which means it helps promote good gut bacteria that are essential to keeping your digestive and immune systems ticking over efficiently.

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Ingredients 5 peaches 2 tbsp manuka honey Juice from ½ lime ½ tsp turmeric

Chop peaches into chunks and freeze the day before (saving one out of the freezer for serving). Put all ingredients into a blender and whizz until smooth. Scoop into serving dishes, decorate with sliced peach, and serve immediately.

Turmeric can help women manage some symptoms of menopause such as hot flushes and joint pain. This is due to its antiinflammatory properties.

Serves 2 Prep Time 15 mins

Total Time overnight

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Method

Fresh Green Smoothie Method

Tightly pack 2 cups of spinach into a blender. Add water and blend together until all leafy chunks are gone. Add all other ingredients and blend again until smooth, and serve.

Ingredients

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2 cups of washed spinach 2 tsp spirulina 2 tsp chia seeds 1 mango 2 slices of pineapple 1 banana 200ml water

Chia Seeds are loaded with antioxidants and packed with high quality protein.

Serves 2 Prep Time 15 mins

Total Time 15 mins

Collagen Our body is made up of 30% protein, 90% of which is collagen. Collagen occurs throughout the body, but especially in the skin, bones and connective tissues. It's also found in our muscles, joints, blood vessels, the digestive system, tendons, ligaments, and the intestinal lining. It provides our skin with elasticity and strength as well as replacing dead skin cells and contributing to the health of joints and the lining of the gut. Ensuring the production of this protein within the body is essential.

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The bad news is that our bodies make less collagen as we age. Decreasing collagen contributes to wrinkles, stiffer, less flexible tendons and ligaments; shrinking, wearing muscles, joint pain or osteoarthritis due to worn cartilage and gastrointestinal problems due to thinning of the lining of your digestive tract. There are some things you can do to slow the decline. Getting adequate sleep is important to promote healthy collagen. Staying out of the sun can also help, as UV radiation can lead to collagen breaking down at a faster rate than normal ageing. To lessen this chance,

non-toxic sunscreen can help prevent premature ageing. But one of the main reasons people do not have enough collagen is due to poor diet. Eating a less than optimal diet containing a lot of sugar, caffeine, alcohol and processed foods and harmful habits like smoking, can also contribute to the decline in collagen production. When your body produces collagen, it combines amino acids which are the nutrients you get from eating proteinrich foods, like beef, chicken, fish, legumes, beans, eggs, dairy products, nuts, seeds, quinoa and tofu. The process also requires vitamin C and minerals, zinc and copper. You can get vitamin C by eating citrus fruits, red and green peppers, tomatoes, broccoli and greens. You can get the minerals from meats, shellfish, nuts, whole grains and beans.

Want to learn more about collagen, or anything else related to menopause? To access our free training - click here.

Foods Containing Collagen: Soy Products Tofu, Tempeh, Soybeans, Edamame Beans, Whole Soy Milk, Soy Drinks, Natural Soy Yogurt, Miso, Miso Soup, Miso Paste, Natto

Seeds & Nuts Flaxseeds (Linseeds), Sesame Seeds, Sunflower Seeds, Pistachios, Almonds, Walnuts

Legumes Chickpeas, Lentils, Adzuki Beans, Red Kidney Beans, Mung Beans, Alfalfa Sprouts, Split Peas

Fashion We are probably all in need of a wardrobe refresh after staying indoors for such a long time!

Oliver Bonas has this beautiful set of three ryle organic curved bangles. Price: £26.

This season we'll look at calm and fresh naturals with a splash of colour here and there. Why not treat yourself?

Editor's picks, this season.

This ruched waist skirt from Boden is flattering, easy to wear and would become one of your staple wardrobe items. Price: £65.

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Next has this fabulous versatile midi dress at £45. Perfect with flats on it's own or with a denim jacket if it's a little chilly. It's also smart enough to wear with wedges and a wrap for evenings out.

These gorgeous wedges from Next will go with everything and are smart enough to wear when going out for dinner! Price: £39.

These cute earrings from M&S are versatile enough to go with any outfit. Price: £7.50.

This lovely linen blend shift in ochre is a snip at £13 from Nutmeg at Morrisons.

This easy wear pure cotton navy cardigan from M&S is great when you need an extra layer. Price: £i9.50.

Try these linen blend navy wide leg trousers from Next. Price: £22.

This pretty linen blend button through top is £18 at Tu in Sainsbury's.

These Super comfy khaki linen blend trousers from Next are a perfect alternative to jeans. Price: £18.

This FATFACE Lauren Mimosa Jumpsuit is so flattering and available for £49.50 at Sainsbury's.

Team shorts with this gorgeous Linen blend pink blouse in Tu at Sainsburys for £16.

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We love these comfortable leather wedges from Fitflop. Such a treat for your feet! Grab these for £120.

Hair Thinning Less hair on my head and more on my face, what is happening? Oestrogen helps to keep hair in its growing phase, and so declining levels of oestrogen may be why menopausal women find their hair to be thinner, and falling out more quickly than they are used to. An imbalance of hormones may mean we have too much relative testosterone, meaning our pattern of hair loss becomes more 'male'. Increased relative testosterone levels can also cause increased facial hair.

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There are 2-types of facial hair: Vellus - short, soft, downy and barely visible. Terminal - longer, darker, thicker and visible. Hormone levels are largely responsible for determining how much of each hair type an individual has. Oestrogen encourages vellus and testosterone converts to dihydrotestosterone (DHT), which encourages the coarser terminal hair on the chin, neck, and upper lip. When hormones fluctuate in menopause, we may then see a change in the quality of what grows on our face

(medically known as minor hypertrichosis).

What can we do? Check Our Diet Dietary deficiencies caused by poor nutrition, and a lack of certain vitamins and minerals can affect hair growth. Improve Hormonal Balance Diet and HRT may slow the process, but unfortunately loss of hair volume is an inevitable part of ageing. Ultimately, we may need to adjust how we treat and style our hair. Minimise Heat Damage Reducing heat damage to hair may improve the appearance of volume. Hair Products Hair thickening shampoos and topical solutions can help if used correctly and consistently. Low Energy Laser-Light Laser-light Is said to stimulate hair growth but there is insufficient evidence to support this yet. This treatment must be carried out by a qualified practitioner. Some women may not care and choose to do nothing

if they find increases in their facial hair growth, but for others it can be distressing as it can impact on our sense of femininity. Loss of hair volume and thinning, known as Female Pattern Hair Loss, is a factor of ageing. This seems to affect many women during perimenopause.

Again, rebalancing hormones could help, but for many, hair removal is the key treatment. Plucking, depilatory creams, waxing, electrolysis (using a small electrical current to kill-off the hair follicle) or low energy laser-light is all widely available. Note: Any abnormal hair loss or growth could also be a symptom of an underlying condition, or a result of medication taken for other conditions, so it's always best to consult your doctor.

Symptoms May Be Linked To Gut Bacteria Science has shown that the human body is made up of just 10% human DNA, the other 90% of us is made up of trillions of bacteria, fungi and microflora that live on and in us. This is called the microbiome.

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The gut can host up to 2kg of the microbiome Studies show that the state of the gut microbiome can affect all the systems and processes of the body. An imbalance in the gut microbiome, where there are too many bad bacteria and not enough good, is called Dysbiosis. This can lead to a leaky gut, which causes systemic inflammation in the body. When we realise that the majority of our hormones are produced in the gut, and if bacteria becomes unbalanced, it’s not too difficult to see that it can cause havoc with our physical and mental health.

Our clients are often surprised to learn that over 90% of Serotonin, the happy hormone, is produced in the gut!

Gaba, the calming and relaxing hormone that helps us deal with stress and anxiety is produced in the gut along with Melatonin, our sleep hormone. Dopamine and noradrenaline, the hormones responsible for us jumping out of bed in the morning and giving us the motivation to get things done, as well as Oxytocin, the love, trust and self-esteem hormone are also produced in the gut. When we throw oestrogen and progesterone into the mix, it isn’t surprising to see that if the gut is in balance, our clients feel happier, calmer, sleep better, have more energy and motivation, their hormones are balanced through menopause and they often tell us they feel more like themselves again.

What is the Gut Reset Bootcamp? The Gut Reset Bootcamp is a fully supported 30day programme of diet, nutrition, supplements, light to moderate exercise and holistic therapies. With oneto-one and group coaching sessions, our mentors will support you all the way to reset your gut microbiome, detox at a cellular level, improve lifestyle habits and kick start your health to new and improved heights.

therapies, exercises, live cooking demos and a private Facebook community to name a few. Our clients have improved their menopause symptoms naturally, reduced hot sweats, improved mood, reduced brain fog, increased energy, lost weight and much more.

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Weight gain also affects 65% of postmenopausal women and is associated with the onset of metabolic dysfunction. Furthermore, gut bacteria affects our metabolism and lack of oestrogen is likely responsible for weight gain during menopause.

Are you on HRT but still not feeling your best? Or perhaps you don't want to take medication and would prefer to go down the natural route? Do you dread that moment when you are in public and you have a hot sweat, your face turns bright red, you're desperate to cool down and you worry what people think? We can help.

We have a meal planner, daily mindfulness, meditations, holistic

FREE Gut Reset Bootcamp to giveaway! Enter now for a chance to win by clicking here.

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Vaginal Dryness: Is It Still Taboo? By Dr. August Wolff & Dr. S. Garcia

Vaginal dryness remains under-diagnosed and under-treated in the UK. Between women and doctors are relevant deficits of communication. Statistics show an unwillingness to discuss vaginal symptoms among British women.

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This situation leads to the fact that only 27% of postmenopausal British women admit to suffering from symptoms of vaginal dryness and are therefore treated, but with unclear treatment regimes, of which 43% use non-prescription vaginal treatments, 28% prescription and 13% both. On top of that, women complain about the lack of efficacy of OTC treatments, while in the case of prescription products they complain about side effects or safety concerns. When British women were asked about their postmenopausal symptoms, 48% of them reported vulvovaginal dryness as well as 75% hot flushes and 60% insomnia. More interestingly, dyspareunia or painful sex was recognised by 73% of postmenopausal British

women with vaginal dryness. So, the best symptom for recognising vaginal dryness seems to be linked to the symptom dyspareunia or painful sex. On the other hand, vaginal dryness is the prelude to painful vaginal atrophy, if left unattended. As we know, painful sex has significant negative consequences on a woman's quality of life, and for this reason it is necessary to clarify the unequivocal link between vaginal dryness and dyspareunia. In fact, after menopause, when a woman's oestrogen levels are drastically and irreversibly reduced, vaginal dryness can easily lead to vaginal atrophy. And this is exactly what every health specialist would like to avoid. Just as menopause is not a disease but a natural ageing phase in a woman's life, vaginal dryness

is also not a disease. And that is exactly the opinion of menopausal experts societies (NAMS, IMS, BMS) who recommend hormonefree vaginal products in the first place as a treatment for vaginal dryness. This means that vaginal dryness does not mostly require medication nor surgery, nor do the unpleasant symptoms last indefinitely for life. That is why, we can react against an imbalance or bodily change by recovering previous vaginal health.

What happens to the vaginal skin when oestrogen levels fall? Over the course of life, the ovaries stop producing the female hormone oestrogen and, as a result, oestrogen decreases throughout the body, from head to toe. Vulva and vaginal tissues are affected by this oestrogen decline, which

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Continued - Vaginal Dryness: Is It Still Taboo? affects collagen production and tissue irrigation. The natural folds of the vaginal epithelium are lost, leading to reduced blood flow and thus reduced transudation, which means that the vagina is no longer sufficiently moisturised. In addition, the number of lactobacilli protecting the balance of the vaginal flora drops significantly due to the structural change of the epithelium affecting the availability of nutrients required for survival. These changes are usually noticeable 2-3 years after

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menopause. Dryness and collagen loss processes are also experienced on the skin of the face and body. If left untreated, vaginal dryness evolves into vaginal atrophy with often severe symptoms of burning, itching or even pain. Due to the reduced blood supply, vaginal lubrication is also reduced, leading to painful intercourse. All these symptoms are critical because although they do not raise the alarm about a disease, they can have a decisive impact on a woman's quality of life and in many cases on the couples' relationship. Thus, it starts with a simple vaginal dryness and ends with an antidepressant treatment (which increases vaginal dryness) or even a divorce.

Because of the severity of the symptoms, some women need the help of a clinician and the prescription of a hormonal vaginal preparation. However, women are not always allowed to use hormonal treatments and some women just do not want to. In fact, as a general rule, international menopausal experts (NAMS, IMS , BMS) recommend hormone-free moisturising preparations as the first choice to relieve symptoms of vaginal dryness. Only when hormone-free treatments fail to reduce bothersome symptoms, then we could try an estriol low dose vaginal cream.

On the other hand, Dr. Wolff‘s Vagisan Moisturising Cream is formulated as a cream and as such it provides moisture and soothing lipids to the vaginal epithelium. This oil in water emulsion containing 23% lipids, improves the skin`s

smoothness and suppleness ultimately alleviating the symptoms of vaginal dryness, which have been proven in several clinical studies. The cream pH has been adjusted to pH 4.5 with lactic acid to maintain the natural acidity (pH) of the vagina. The osmolality was also optimized for intravaginal use (<380 mOsm/kg). As a result, a regular use of the hormone-free Dr. Wolff‘s Vagisan Moisturising Cream provides a long-lasting moisturising effect, unlike water-based gels. Three clinical studies carried out with this vaginal cream

demonstrate its excellent efficacy in reducing the severity of symptoms such as vaginal dryness, itching, burning and, above all, dyspareunia. Two of them in postmenopausal women and one in breast cancer patients.

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Over-the-counter products are classified according to their ingredients and caring properties. Some of them are water-based lubricants, which are of help in sexual intercourse but do not have moisturising properties. Moisturising water-based gels with ingredients such as hyaluronic acid are perfectly able to provide moisture and facilitate sexual intercourse.

Clinical study with 151 postmenopausal women treated with Dr. Wolff‘s Vagisan Moisturising Cream or a vaginal estriol (0.1 %) cream for 6 weeks evidenced that the hormone-free moisturising cream was equally effective at reducing bothersome symptoms as hormone-containing cream.

Menopause In The Workplace Legislation now exists which protects female workers going through menopause and it is essential that everyone has at least some education around this topic.

Managing the impact of menopause at work is important for both workers and employers. Menopause is a natural stage of life for women, usually in their late forties/early fifties. It can also happen earlier or later. For many women symptoms last about four years, but in some cases can last longer - up to 12 years.

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Part of the process includes what is termed 'perimenopause' when a woman's body is starting to change in the build-up to menopause. Perimenopause usually starts in the midforties but can start earlier or later and last several years. Perimenopause is not the same as early menopause (this is when a woman enters menopause before her forties). Perimenopausal and menopausal symptoms already affect a substantial number of workers. That number is expected to grow considerably, with more older workers forecast to stay in or go back to work.

Currently, many workers do not disclose their menopausal symptoms at work. In addition, many who take time off work because of menopause do not tell their employer the real reasons for their absence. This can be because the worker feels that their symptoms are a private or personal matter, their symptoms might be embarrassing for them or the person they would be confiding in. Perhaps they do not know their line manager well enough. Or they simply might be wary because their line manager is a man, younger or unsympathetic. Other worries might be that their symptoms will not be taken seriously. Or, if they do talk, their symptoms will become widely known at work. They might feel that they will be thought to be less capable and their job and security and/or chances of promotion will be harmed. Supporting an employee through menopause needs understanding, and it is important that the whole team are aware of the legislation.

It is best practice to have a robust menopause policy in place, alongside education or training for everyone on the team.

Menopause at work is covered by two legislative acts to protect employees: The Equality Act 2010: Menopause is largely covered under three protected characteristics: age, sex and disability discrimination.

The Health and Safety at Work Act 1974: Provides for safe working, which extends to the working conditions when experiencing menopausal symptoms.

If you are an employer and would like to establish a menopause policy or workplace training please contact Adam Pavey, our specialist employment lawyer. Get in touch: adam.pavey@pannonecorporate.com

Free Training Our Founder Dee Murray qualified in the 1990s as an advanced psychotherapist and is recognized as a leading light in human behaviour. Her award-winning programmes have become known as comprehensive support to women going through hormonal change. She will tell anyone who will listen how important information and education is, not only for physical wellbeing but perhaps just as important psychologically. She believes that good mental wellbeing forms the bedrock that supports physical health.

Education prevents feelings of helplessness as Dee explains: "A close friend of my mother decided to end her life at only 54, after suffering severe bouts of depression and anxiety associated with menopause.

perimenopause myself, to bring about change to 'the change' and remove the stigma and taboo that is now seen as old-fashioned. Education allows women to feel uplifted, empowered, and more confident once they know what is happening biologically and psychologically."

What do we cover during training? We believe in making things as simple as they can be. So with that in mind, we have tried not to use too many clinical words or expressions, however, it is important that you understand quite a bit about the biology of the female body.

Once you understand what is happening, everything else falls into place. You'll discover what estrogen is, why we need it, and how many other hormones contribute to our health like progesterone, and even testosterone! We also investigate the pros and cons of HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy) and other ways to best manage symptoms, through diet and lifestyle as well as clinical intervention where needed. In some cases both natural remedies and/or HRT are appropriate. However, many women cannot (for a variety of reasons) have HRT. You will learn about what happens within the brain during perimenopause (the lead-up to not having periods any longer). PLUS We include information on exactly what the three stages of menopause are, and how you can better understand where you are in the menopause journey.

The suicide rate in women's midlife has been increasing over the last few decades, so I decided when I experienced

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We supply our education free of charge, because we want all women to feel educated regardless of financial status.

Laughter With Comedian, Mel Byron Sometimes we have to be able to laugh at ourselves, it's healthy and lifts the mood - we decided to bring you a little light hearted laughter from Mel Byron. I said ‘For the last time, I refuse to hobnob with the glamorous, millionaire set, drinking champagne out of Daniel Craig’s shoe with one hand and filing copy with the other.’ Then I hung up. So I’ve burnt my bridges with Vogue and Harper’s Bazaar, and it’s fine.

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You’ve got to find your Tribe. A place to belong, with friends that become like family. By that, I don’t mean they steal your make-up whilst screaming ‘I never asked to be born!’. I am a woman of a certain age, with a dodgy internal thermostat and a lot of clothes I will diet back into. One day. What would I be doing among a bunch of people who wouldn’t know a sagging bottom if it hit them in the face? (Mine actually did that once. I can’t talk about it though until after the court case. Grievous buttockly harm!)

Menopause Life is my tribal home and I’m excited to be here. There are other magazines aimed at us, of course. I used to subscribe to Hot Flush Monthly, but I struggled with the irony of its being, er…monthly. Vaginal Atrophy Journal failed to rouse me. I do recall a fascinating piece in …oh… what was it now? You know the one…That’s right, Brain Fog Friend! The article claimed that, physiologically, menopausal women were exactly the same as men. I was so shocked, I spat out my real ale. Then I thought maybe a bit of masculine energy wouldn’t go amiss. I could spend my days talking twaddle with confidence and driving one-handed. A couple of paragraphs later, I discovered it had nothing to do with swagger and everything to do with an abundance of iron in the blood. Avoid eating liver, it said. Who needs to be told? Pity though, as I did see myself in meetings, leaning back in a chair, legs apart, saying ‘I’m onboard John, let’s lock it down by close of play.’

In days of yore, when we went to real places and saw actual people, I worked evenings in darkened rooms, giving pleasure to total strangers. No, you haven’t strayed over to The Pole Dancer’s Gazette, I am a stand-up comedian. This job, thankfully, has zero requirement for a tight pelvic floor, although if an audience member wets herself, it’s a compliment. Laughs are my stock-intrade. Laughs with my Tribe? I couldn’t turn that down. And I get to sit whilst writing this. When I stand up for the funnies, it’s not always the Tribe out front. Punters are often younger than me, so I enlighten them. Young men definitely enjoy the womb-based banter. I can see it in their eyes. A humorous column could be a new opportunity to make menopause cool and get some tribal hangers-on. No wait, Vogue might start pestering again. That would be embarrassing. I take it all back. Next time I have some new bone density gags, I’ll just share them with you. Let’s keep it tribal.

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Home & Garden On trend this summer, we have a few naturals for calmness. But with bold wallpaper also being the order of the day, there is something for everyone.

The rubbed away painted shabby chic look is giving

way to more formal offerings with a heritage twist. Deep jewel-like colours and an industrial vibe is also trending.

Editor's picks, this season.

This Pomegranate Blue Scale Wallpaper from Little Greene is part of their National Trust range £104

Plain teal wallpaper shows how you can combine all those jewel-like colours with industrial styling. £45 Graham & Brown

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Art Deco inspired wallpaper really hits the heritage brief. Holden - Delano Geo Wallpaper, Pink & Rose Gold £12.99

Treasure Chest Wallpaper in Deep Ocean Navy is daringly decadent...we love it! Lust Home £40

Three seater Florence Sofa, Opulence Teal, really caught our eye. £899 from Sofa Sofa

Christy have this great magenta velvet throw from £98

Pretty bee cushion £15 M&S

Cute etched metal side table is £85 Oliva Bonas

Industrial leather armchair ivy anthracite £329.95 Furnwise

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5-drawer chest of drawers in green solid acacia £486 at Maisons Du Monde

Here are our top 10 gardening tips for you, this season.

10.

Hoe borders regularly to keep down weeds

Pinch out side shoots on tomatoes

Position summer hanging baskets and containers outside

Stake tall or floppy plants

Plant out summer bedding

Be water-wise, especially in droughtaffected areas

Harvest lettuce, radish, other salads and early potatoes

Mow lawns at least once a week

Prune any springflowering shrubs

Shade greenhouses to keep them cool and prevent scorch

By Dr. Sheila French I realised I needed help with the menopause when one day, things got really stressful. I was teaching 140 students in a university lecture theatre one Monday morning. I asked the students a question, I waited for an answer, which didn’t come very quickly. As I did so I realised that I had completely forgotten what I had asked them. I felt myself get stressed, my heart started to pound, and a hot flush followed. Of course, they didn’t even notice as I bluffed my way through their answers but it was an awful moment for me. There were more times like that before I found help with my symptoms. Today with my skills in coaching and mindfulness I am much more able to handle this. I have strategies, I can apply , which I also teach to many of the women who come to me when the menopause is raging. Strategies to manage the stress of the menopause and build up self-esteem and confidence. There are medical interventions such as HRT that can be really effective, but these aren’t always

Step 1 – Take a moment to acknowledge how you are feeling in the mind and the body. Do not be judgemental or critical of yourself. Just notice. Pay attention to what is there. Now let that go.

appropriate for everyone. So, if you are suffering right now, here is a little Mindfulness exercise you can do either quietly on your own or even in a busy room. Your heart rate will slow, you will give yourself a little space, a little time out. Time to collect yourself before you face whatever you need to. You can do this in just a minute or two. Or take longer, you are in control so you decide at the time.

Step 2 – Now turn your attention to the breath, follow the whole breath in and the whole breath out 5 times. Then turn your attention to the body and notice where the breath is coming in and out of the body. Perhaps the chest is rising and falling, or you can feel the air coming in and out of the nostrils. Or perhaps it's further down in the body where you feel it. Just really focus on it. Step 3 – Just rest here now with the breath and body for a few moments allowing the breath to calm the body and mind. Do this 5 – 10 times or longer if you wish.

No-one will notice you doing this if you just lower your gaze and follow the simple 4 steps below.

Step 4 – Now gently open your eyes, you will feel calmer and ready to get on with your day.

Begin by making yourself comfortable on a chair, lower your gaze. Feet firmly on the floor, hands resting on your knees.

Do this exercise any time and I know it will help. You are also practising and giving yourself another of the tenets of Mindfulness, which is kindness to self.

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Managing Menopausal Stress

Travel By Chloe Bell

Picture white sandy beaches, postcard perfect snaps and devilishly delicious delights to devour this summer. Imagine a break away that suits everyone, whether you’re a swashbuckling adventurist or a ‘chill out in a hot tub’ kind of holidaymaker, you probably assume that a trip like this means jumping on a plane and jet setting halfway across the world.

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Well, actually, there’s a slice of summery shore much closer to home. For anyone who hasn’t visited Cornwall, it’s an absolute must to scribble onto a travel bucket list. Its beauty is undeniable and its turquoise waves and spanning beaches make it seem like you’re far away, immersed in a tropical paradise. Cornwall, situated on England’s southwestern tip, is probably best known for

it’s Cornish pasties, clotted cream teas and countless flavours of ice cream, but there’s an abundance of things to see and do there. St Ives has some stunning views and is well known for its art galleries and breathtaking coastal walks. You can enjoy some unique culinary delights at One Fish Street, which boasts everything from red snapper risotto to pork cheek with scallop. Padstow is particularly praised for its independent restaurants. Prawn on the Lawn is a seafood standout, you can gobble down some freshly caught fish tapas and enjoy chilling out before you head back out to explore again. If you like to pack as many awe-inspiring sights into your trip as possible then Land’s End is a must see for the snaps, you can take in the ragged rocks, dizzy

drops and unspoilt scenery. The most Westerly point of mainland Cornwall, it houses the infamous sign informing you of how many miles it is to John O'Groats, Isles of Scilly and New York. If you’re not wary of heights, and are hankering for some more adventure, you can head over to Tintagel and explore the castle via the bridge that is suspended 58 metres above the choppy waters below. Eager for a more relaxing day? Perranporth prides itself on brilliant views across the sparkling, sunlit waters of the Atlantic. It’s the perfect place to watch the sunset after a long day of exploring. Boasting many a hot tub equipped cabin, caravan, lodge or hotel, you can kick back in style in Cornwall and wander around the surrounding towns at ease. If you’re a Poldark or Doc

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Martin fan or enjoy the works of Daphne Du Maurier, then you’ve struck gold. You can embark on a Poldark trail to spy where the show was shot, visit Port Isaac where Doc Martin was filmed, then you can head up to Bodmin Moor and take a peek at Jamaica Inn, the historic smugglers hangout, where author Daphne Du Maurier based her famous novel. St Michael’s Mount is a picturesque place to see and if you’re someone who enjoys taking in some fabulous architecture, then do check out the famous open-air Minack Theatre, which gazes out over the coast. One thing’s for sure, no matter what you like to get stuck into on holiday, Cornwall undoubtedly has something to suit everyone and has a fantastic food soundtrack to accompany your travels! Munch on a mouth-watering crab sandwich, sip on an expertly crafted cocktail or wolf down a typically British Fish’n’Chip dinner on the beach, whatever you choose to do, you’re in for a truly tremendous treat in Cornwall.

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If you’re raring to revel in some relaxing vibes this summer, the Cotswolds could be your perfect pick for a break away. Famed for its quaint English market towns, the refreshingly sleepy Cotswolds spans from South-central to South-west England. Nestled at the heart is the Cotswold Hills, officially deemed ‘An Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty’, it’s the third largest protected landscape in England. The instantly recognisable honey-coloured houses and stunning rolling countryside ensures the Cotswolds is a real standout for holidaymakers. It’s a serene sanctuary to kick back and

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enjoy nature as well as experience a different pace of life.

Gloucester Cathedral and drink up it’s fantastic history and gothic architecture.

Slip on your walking wellies (it can get a little muddy mooching around) and head out to hike the famous National Trail, which boasts over 100 miles of untroubled scenery. It’s truly nature as it was meant to be, no highrise buildings or traffic, just you, the crisp morning air and your sight, struggling to take in the stunning simplicity of our world.

The Roman Baths in neighbouring city Bath is an afternoon well spent and a staple of the area. Wander around the World Heritage Site and enjoy the relaxing surroundings of England’s only natural hot spring.

Although there’s plenty of time to get up close and personal with the breathtaking surroundings, there’s no end of things to see and do. Apart from the windswept walks you can enjoy, why not visit some of the surrounding Cotswolds towns and villages. Head over to the towering

Cotswolds wildlife park is also a great day out to add if you’re looking for an activity with a bit more ‘roar’ for the road. If you love to experience a fantastic collision of culture and history, then The Royal Gardens at Highgrove are fantastic to amble around and if you wanted to take a drive to Oxfordshire, which is still part of the Cotswolds, you can visit English heritage site and Winston Churchill’s birthplace, Blenheim Palace.

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If you’re on the hunt for a more chilled day, why not take a trip up to Cotswolds Distillery and revel in how your favourite spirits get made. Sample some delights and get that holiday feeling with a glass of something refreshingly cool, yet tantalisingly tasty in your hand. If you’re more about wandering around leisurely, enjoying some beautifully typical English sights, then hit up Bourton-on-the-Water, a quaint yet vibrant village voted the prettiest in England. Marvel at the trickling waters of River Windrush which flow through the middle of the village. Often fondly referred to as England’s answer to Venice, Bourton-on-thewater is a real treat for the eyes, ears and rumbling stomachs! Stop to refuel at one of the charming pubs and enjoy the mouth-

watering selections, get stuck into the menu at the Rose Tree Restaurant, the cosy Mousetrap Inn, or stop for a coffee at The Garden Café. The Cotswolds is a match made in heaven for foodies indeed, make sure you sample some of it’s delicious delights. Stinking Bishop Cheese, Tewkesbury Mustard and Bibury Trout are famous standout Cotswold offerings and you’ll be able to find them proudly served at most local restaurants. So, if you’re looking for a break to unwind and enjoy some tranquil peace and quiet this summer, why not consider the Cotswolds?

Run Your Own Menopause Business Earn Extra Income, Change Women's Lives. Click Here To Apply.

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Award-winning Menopause Experts Group is growing internationally. We provide exciting opportunities for women to run menopause workshops and events under our brand license. You will also be able to offer our exciting new range of retail products to those needing help and support during this significant life-phase.

This amazing business opportunity is open to those who have a passion for women's health and interest in menopause.

You must also be prepared to accept our comprehensive menopause training (included free), which will give you all the valuable knowledge needed to run your own business dedicated to menopause. Our services offer women a safe space to discuss how they feel,

talk about their own unique experiences, and follow our guidance by learning more about natural menopause and also understand if HRT or other treatments might be right for them.

When Sex Hurts By Dr. Claire Macaulay When we think of menopausal symptoms, the one most people will name first is hot flushes, or vasomotor symptoms to give them their Sunday name. But often even before your first experience of a ‘trip for one’ to the Sahara, you may notice something else.

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It may be a bit squeaky “down there” when you are having sex. Things are maybe not as juicy as they once were. Or you may have some nippiness or pain when wiping after going to the toilet. Sometimes burning or itching or feelings like you have a urine infection often lead people to self-treat repeatedly for thrush that doesn’t seem to go away. One of the earliest effects of the drop in oestrogen levels that occurs at the menopausal transition is on the structures and tissues in our pelvis – vulva, vagina, clitoris, urethra, bladder and the muscles of the pelvic floor. Over half of menopausal people will experience some of these symptoms that are brought together under the term the Genitourinary Syndrome of Menopause (GSM). But less than one quarter of them will seek help.

This can cause Big Problems with your sex life. If your vagina is drier than a camel’s armpit, you are pretty unlikely to want to have sex! And along with loss of sexual desire and decreased genital sensitivity, vaginal dryness is part of the unholy triad that the women I work with describe as destroying their ability to enjoy the sexual expression that they want in their lives. An important thing to know about the vaginal symptoms that come with menopause is that, unlike other symptoms like hot flushes, they will not get better with time. Once the delicate tissues have changed due to lack of oestrogen, they will not recover. At the far end of the scale, shortening and closure of the vagina can make arousal, lubrication and penetration near impossible. Early intervention to halt or reverse early changes is necessary to avoid worsening symptoms.

So what can help? First, don’t panic. Often, I see that the anxiety and worry about lack of lubrication and the possibility for painful sex makes the whole situation worse. Noticing and reaching acceptance with the changes occurring in your body is the first step to making choices about what you want to do

next. There are hormonal and non-hormonal approaches to moisturising the vagina and vulva. Oestrogen creams and pessaries applied in the vagina replace the lost oestrogen and are highly effective. For women in whom full HRT is not advised or who choose not to use HRT, vaginal oestrogen can be very helpful, as it does not have an effect on the rest of the body and has very limited side effects and risks. For women who choose full HRT, about 1 in 4 will still need additional vaginal oestrogen to manage pain and dryness.

Over the age of 45: I suggest that vulva owners moisturise every day, in the same way that we moisturise our face. There are specialised non-hormonal moisturisers, some available on prescription, to alleviate dryness and irritation. And

you don’t necessarily need a specialised product – many women report a small amount of coconut oil or other edible oil massaged lovingly every day is a beautiful way to establish a caring connection with your lady bits. Just don’t mix oils with condoms!

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And finally, for sexual activity that involves genital touch – slow down and take your time to work up through the phases of arousal to give your body a chance to relax into the experience. And incorporate lube, lube and more lube into your playtime. One of my mantras -You can never have too much lube!

My Early Menopause Heartache By Laura Simpson

As a 30-year old woman, enjoying the luxuries you have before children come along such as travelling, socialising and generally carefree, the word menopause was a long way from my horizon. Or so I thought.

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After getting married, trying for a family was the next step, my contraceptive implant was removed and my husband and I braced ourselves for our next exciting adventure together. Month 3 came and went with no period, constant negative pregnancy tests mixed with a nagging doubt that something wasn’t right led to blood tests and ultrasound scans of my ovaries. Fast forward to a Gynaecology consulting room by myself… ‘blood results show you have premature ovarian failure (early menopause). Judging by the very small size of your ovaries you will have a slim to nil chance of conceiving naturally.’ The only thing I remember after that sentence was thinking my heart was going to beat out of my chest and feeling like I was going to pass out.

The term Premature Ovarian Failure (POF) is not bad news that can ever be broken to someone without feeling like a complete failure themselves, given that it is the name of the diagnosis itself. Put in the same sentence as ‘no chance of conceiving naturally’ is catastrophic to a 30-year old woman. Feeling old before my time as my joints became swollen and painful. The hot flushes were keeping me awake at night and eventually taking HRT, something I associated with women of my mum’s age. The agonising guilt I felt at not being able to give my husband our much wanted child.

There were so many unanswered questions and innumerable fears as I embarked on a life with early menopause. If you or anyone you know is experiencing the distress that can come with premature menopause, please seek support and guidance from our wonderful friends at the charitable organisation:

Dating During Menopause By Kate Mansfield

Dating in midlife can be different to when you were in your 20s, add lockdown to the mix and it's all a little daunting. It needn't be, here Kate Mansfield shares one of her success stories with us. As we went into Lockdown last March I must say that as a dating and relationship coach I had serious doubts about the future of my business. How are we going to help these women to find love when they can’t even leave their homes? How can they date, connect with men and follow what was back then, a very action oriented structure in my coaching process?

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Little did I know what an absolute gift it lockdown would be for my clients, and how when Caroline came to me – a successful CEO, single mum of 3 teenagers, one with significant special needs, about to turn 50, and coming out of a miserable 20 year marriage, she had no idea that she would be one of the first to benefit from the powerful changes that we were forced to make. As you can imagine, Caroline was full of doubt, and she had many logical reasons as to why dating might present some very real challenges. Wasn’t she too old? Didn’t most men really want a sexy, eager to please 22-year old? What man would possibly want to take on a fiercely

independent, mature, selfsufficient woman with a few laughter lines and a gaggle of challenging teenagers? And deeper than this – did the kind of love that she had always dreamed of really exist, or was it just a crazy fantasy?

As it turned out, Caroline was one of many of our clients who ended up reaping huge benefits of dating in lockdown. Firstly, the rule that historically most women had found hardest to follow in my process, which is to keep dating non-physical, nonsexual and not over investing too soon - was now enforced! Then, I paired with a men’s dating group and we did mixed gender Q & A calls, which turned out to be a game changer for my female clients. They were taught how to connect with men emotionally, how to get vulnerable and to share themselves authentically. Sex was completely off the table, which for all of my clients suddenly opened up a new world of learning about what a healthy relationship really is.

The men that they were dating online suddenly were also forced to court them, and this simplified the process, and kept them in a place of consciousness, rather than over excitement. This worked out superbly for Caroline, and using my strategies and feedback from men in the group, she navigated a new way of dating, as a high-value woman with standards, needs and respect for herself. Caroline met Nick on her 7th online zoom date, and by then she knew exactly what to do to set the relationship up for success. She allowed him to show up and she gave it time, speaking her truth, knowing her worth and finally understanding how to position herself as the prize, as opposed to chasing, controlling or over investing too soon. Caroline and Nick are still dating 4 months later, and in her own words he is “everything on my vision board, and more”. Caroline is blown away by being with a man who sees her, hears her and loves her for who she really is. The key part of this work was teaching Caroline how to love herself first. The rest just unfolded naturally. True love does exist – and what men want is the same as women.

Ultimately, we all want someone to love us for who

we really are, the dark, the light and the boring bits in between. But before we can find this – we have to learn how to lock down true acceptance and unconditional love – inside of us!

Same-Sex Marriages By Kaleigh Kinney

I entered into a permanent surgical menopause aged 30, just over five years ago following my total hysterectomy and oophorectomy (removal of both ovaries). To say the severity at which nearly every symptom took hold of me was brutal would be an understatement; to say we weren’t prepared for it, even more so.

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My partner, Sarah, was 37 when I entered into surgical menopause. Fresh into a new and exciting relationship, why would we – at 30 and 37 years of age - have ever given the menopause a second thought? After all, it’s just hot flushes and a natural process of getting older, isn’t it?! Naively, this tired old cliché is pretty much what we both believed at the time. I didn’t crash into my menopause until around 6 months after my surgery. I had a gradual worsening of symptoms: hot flushes in the day followed by night sweats with both creeping in with more frequency. I struggled to work. I changed my hours to work 9am – 3pm as I would crash every day around 3:30/4pm and have to sleep for a couple of hours. Alongside the extreme fatigue, which would often leave me in bed for days

and sometimes even for weeks, I have to say the emotional and psychological symptoms that hit me were truly devastating and overwhelming. Night sweats meant I would wake up in the night with a bang and be shaking all over. I would feel nauseous and not understand what was happening to me let alone why it was happening. I now know that these were panic attacks. With my history of struggling with hormones, (years of undiagnosed PMDD, mild endometriosis) I had always been used to mood swings and extremes but had never experienced them over such a sustained unrelenting period. The anxiety that came after my hysterectomy was debilitating, awful and prolonged. It was like an intense fear that came from out of nowhere to stop me from working, seeing my family or friends and just living my life. A crippling low depression that

led me to push everyone away and have a paranoid view of things. I lost weight, I had no energy, and my mental state was the worst it had ever been. I would cry every day not understanding why I felt so awful. I didn’t look well. At my worst, I didn’t even want to be here anymore. It was a miserable existence. But at my lowest ebb, I opened up my laptop and began to research.

For Sarah, in those first 6-12 months watching me lose my spark, and become this shell of a person was extremely heartbreaking. She sat with me many evenings in the bedroom watching Netflix and just comforting me over and over. She would tell me not to give in and that it wouldn’t be like this forever. She got me through the initial recovery. She cooked healthy meals, helped me wash, bought me comfy loose clothing when I was suffering with swelly belly and took any pressure off me. But most of all, alongside starting HRT, she saved my life. I was so close to giving in. I felt truly awful and it’s not a place I’d ever want to return to. Surgical menopause without any HRT at 30 was absolutely the worst thing I’ve ever been through and I’ve been through a lot of difficult moments in my life. Her relentless support and superwoman energy, taking care of the kids and me, was something else. And not once did she make me feel guilty despite my feeling like a burden. Anything I learned in that time and going forward, Sarah learned with me. It became like a research project and we left no stone unturned. I had to arm myself with as much knowledge as possible and it became apparent that for me

to feel well I would have to work really hard on my own well-being and become my own advocate.

Hormone implants and testosterone Until I was introduced to hormone implants and testosterone (over 2 years after my hysterectomy) I never really had the confidence - or felt able and well enough - to speak up for myself at appointments. This is where Sarah came in. As she took the time to learn as much as she could from me, to listen to me and to try to understand me, she was able to speak for me when I couldn’t at appointments and she would attend every appointment without fail. It is true to say that I felt she could just understand better and have more empathy simply because she was female. I would often think: “if I was going through this and was with a man, would I get this same level of support and kindness?” I do believe being with a woman through this time helped me. But maybe it is just more to do with the person Sarah is. Though I would say it is easier to talk to a woman about these sorts of things. When sex started to become painful, I could easily say “can we use some lube?” and there was no awkwardness - it just made it more fun. We discussed my symptoms of vaginal dryness and explored my options together. She encouraged me to go along to a chat given by Diane Danzebrink and Jane Lewis. She drove for an hour to get us there just to listen to Jane. That’s the kind of person Sarah is - she knew I was struggling

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I looked at everything I could get my hands on – not that there was much out there at the time. I quickly began to realise the importance of hormone replacement and knew I needed to get on it quickly. I finally went on HRT about 7 months following my hysterectomy. That is simply shocking knowing what I know now. It’s little wonder I felt as bad as I did.

Continued - Same-Sex Marriages and did what she could to help me get clued up on what I needed to do. This dedication to help me is so admirable. For the last year or so, Sarah has been experiencing perimenopausal symptoms. I spotted the signs quite early on - most noticeably her PMS was worsening and my trying to tell her that was not easy! In fairness, I don’t think my grinning about it helped as I found some humour in her now being the one having some mood swings! With regards to Sarah’s symptoms, I encouraged her to be proactive in addressing them. Her periods were getting really heavy, painful and quite erratic. She was developing PMS a few days before her period and had vaginal dryness/bladder issues which were slowly worsening.

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But it was the emotional PMS/ perimenopausal symptoms that were probably more obvious to me quite early on. Sarah is usually quite a calm, rational person with a very high threshold for stress (unlike me!). Yet, she was the one having a few outbursts and I was the one left thinking

“where did that come from?!“ Sarah and I often have a bath together in the evening. It’s where we catch up and just talk. With 3 boys in the house, it’s our time where we know we won’t get interrupted! It was during one of our baths together that I suggested she speak to her GP about the possibility of going on the Mirena coil and also adding in some oestrogen to help with her symptoms. I also suggested that she use local oestrogen to help with her vaginal dryness issues since it can be used alongside systemic as the dose really is tiny. Getting the GP to go ahead with the Mirena coil was fairly straight forward as Sarah was having heavy periods and a lot of pain with them. Sarah had a few routine gynae tests as is standard just to rule out other causes. She was very apprehensive about having the Mirena Coil fitted and almost bailed. I encouraged her and said what she had often told me: “it won’t be as bad as you think.” Afterwards, she said it hurt but nowhere near as badly as she’d been picturing. Over time the coil has really helped with heavy periods and the pain Sarah was getting.

However, the PMS then became the main issue. It wasn’t all the time but did seem to be getting increasingly noticeable. I was adamant she needed some HRT in the form of oestrogen. Her threshold to cope with things wasn’t as good and she was getting snappier than usual. Suddenly we had reversed roles and I went along with her to see her GP. The GP was not really educated in menopause and wanted to try oral HRT. Sarah wanted the oestrogen gel or patches. I could see Sarah getting frustrated as she couldn’t get her point across so I stepped in. I spoke about body identical HRT (which the GP made a note to research). I then explained that Sarah has done her own research and that the gel/patches also allows for flexibility in adjusting the dose easily if necessary and would give Sarah more control. She wouldn’t prescribe any local oestrogen until Sarah had tried systemic oestrogen first as this can help with vaginal dryness issues. Since being on HRT, Sarah has very few noticeable menopausal symptoms and seems more like her old self. The HRT has definitely helped

and getting on it so quickly prevented her from suffering for a lengthy period of time.

I have to say it was not easy navigating these moments when I was having dips in my HRT. At times, when my oestrogen dips or I experience fluctuations, it presents in extremes in moods not dissimilar to my PMDD days. Occasionally, our moods would clash, but still Sarah would be the one trying to rise above how she felt to help me as she knew when I was ‘on one’ I could quickly lose the plot and in a big way! This could lead to Sarah feeling forgotten sometimes. When she’s having symptoms at the same time as me, she quite rightly wants to be cared for and looked after and I feel as if I have let her down at those times when I have been struggling myself. But this is something we’ve navigated through together and we are always learning.

So I write notes down as a way to remember to put myself in her shoes and remember in my busy hormonal brain that there is a person here who has done her best for me at all times, and now she needs my support, my patience, understanding and my knowledge. It is because of what we have been through together that we are able to have the fun, loving and resilient relationship we have despite the chaos of menopause. I think this is because we talk so openly and we have a great sense of humour. It may sound obvious but we have learnt that it is important to make time for just us so that we can just be a couple and have some fun. Being in a same sex marriage and navigating menopause has many advantages in my opinion but on the flipside, it can be easy to get sucked into a reactive, emotionally driven atmosphere – open conversation and accountability is something that helps us both to keep our relationship on a more rational footing.

DISCLAIMER: Please speak to your doctor regarding HRT. For some women, HRT may not be suitable due to family medical history. Always seek advice from a medical professional before embarking on any treatments.

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We both agree that if it hadn’t been for my experience, Sarah would not be where she is now: successfully managing her perimenopausal symptoms with a view to protecting her long-term bone, heart and brain health with oestrogen replacement. Sarah is also using local oestrogen now as it helps manage her most troublesome symptoms.

Most importantly we talk to each other and we listen. I always listen to what Sarah says even if it hurts me and makes me feel like I’m letting her down. If it’s making her feel bad, it’s valid.

Inspirational Woman Featured: Dr. Helena McKeown, Chief Officer, British Medical Association

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How would your best friend describe you?

in her loyalty, generosity or kindness.

I have asked my friend to answer this: "To the casual onlooker, Helena will appear to be gregarious, outgoing and dynamic, with clear direction and purpose. She is all of these things, however, behind the scenes, there is also a more reflective and reserved person.

What motivates you?

In a social setting, Helena is the person who will make sure that everyone is included and not left alone, she makes the effort to spend time with everyone, and will go out of her way to introduce people to each other, and bring them together.

I’m happy when my children and husband are happy. I also love driving in my convertible mini with the roof down!

She knows all her neighbours in her street and is the person who can be relied on to take the initiative when something needs doing, no matter how busy her own life is. She just gets her head down and gets things done. Family is really important to Helena and she makes sure that she is in touch with everyone. The same is true of her friends. I have known Helena for 35 years since our first days at University and not once has she wavered

I’m motivated by equality and helping everyone. I try to enable them to reach their potential and live their best lives.

What makes you happy?

Do you have a good work/life balance? My work-life balance has been dominated by work, unfortunately. So it requires constant rebalancing! The pandemic has required unprecedented work from those within the health sector. My year has been full of very long days whilst also looking after my teenagers. I run for 35 minutes every morning and am also in an 'improving beginners' tennis class!

What piece of advice would you give to your younger self? I would advise my younger self to love the way she is. Helena's passion for helping people has recently spilled over into Menopause Experts Group where she has accepted a position as NonExecutive Director. Helena's experience and influence will help steer the business globally alongside a board of other incredible people from various backgrounds.

Readers' Questions

If you have any questions you want answered in the next issue, email magazine@ menopauseexperts.com

I hear so many stories of women who have gone through some terrible times during menopause, and of course I have also heard plenty of uplifting and inspirational stories too. Each season we want to hear some of your stories, and perhaps some dilemmas or questions you might have. My expertise is the mind and emotion. Let me know what is bothering you, and we can share the solutions together.

Q: After 13 months with nothing, I have had a period. Should I worry there is something else going on? - Jane B. A: Hello Jane, thank you for your question. Twelve months without a period is usually the amount of time you can confirm to yourself that your periods have

officially ended, and you are postmenopausal. However, there may be a stray period that comes along, though likely to be light in nature. The chances are that this could be your last period but any postmenopausal bleeding should be investigated by your GP/ Doctor, it may be something else, so it is wise to rule that out. Your Doctor will most likely take a swab (similar to a Cervical smear) and could send you for an ultrasound to see if there is anything else going on. Try not to worry unnecessarily.

Q: My skin is itching like crazy, mostly at night. Sometimes I wake up with scratches and I have made it bleed. Is this normal in menopause? Sarah M.

A: Hi, this is entirely normal and although unpleasant it is nothing to worry about. As our skin changes with the drop in oestrogen, it can get very dry, which causes the itchiness. After showering, make it a habit to put a good quality moisturiser all over your skin. Allergens can also cause itchiness, gluten in particular. Try to exclude gluten from your meals for a few days to see if this helps, and make sure you are getting plenty of phytoestrogens in your diet. Drink plenty of water too! Our skin changes considerably as we age, and we will start to see several changes throughout our peri to postmenopausal years, but it will settle down eventually. Keeping hydrated is key.

Continued on page 62

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With Dee Murray, Retired Adv. Psychotherapist

Continued - Readers' Questions

Q: My work involves a lot of physical activity and it seems to be making my hot flushes worse. It makes me panic as I go bright red and my face gets really sweaty. It is so embarrassing! - Julie D. A: Hi Julie, this is extremely common and we get a lot of questions about hot flushes! Does your organisation have a menopause policy in place? It is important that they are making some allowances for this. Such as more regular breaks, working by an open window or having cold water available nearby. Try to make time to do our free training which will help you understand more of what you can do to reduce your symptoms. Have a word with your employer to make them aware you are, at times, struggling.

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Q: My body is changing shape and my middle is certainly getting thicker. It's causing me to feel depressed as I have always been slim. I am worried my husband will not find me attractive anymore. - Emma S. A: You are not alone in this and it really is very normal. Try not to get too down about this as you could be making things worse'. Cortisol (our stress hormone) has a part to play as does sleep. It is important to share your worries with your husband. Perhaps you could come up with some activities to help you. Family walks or swimming sessions may help as you will need to increase your activity levels. These are both healthy low-impact exercises. Look at your diet, are you getting all the essential nutrients you need? Last season we did a feature on essential nutrients during menopause.

Try to find a hobby. Something you are passionate about that will lift your mood, and shift your focus. Menopause can be a real challenge as we are experiencing things we have not had to deal with before. Our lives during perimenopause can be different and they are now our new normal. It is important to embrace these changes and try to meet the challenges.