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Chris and Carla
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On love, faith and baseball A mother’s intuition Marital fights and the Eagles
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mschristianliving.com ❘ FEBRUARY 2022 3
contents FEBRUARY 2022 VOLUME 16, NUMBER 8 PUBLISHER
MS Christian Living, Inc. EDITOR
Katie Eubanks katie@mschristianliving.com MANAGING EDITOR
STEGALL IMAGERY
Suzanne Durfey
MCL Editor Katie Eubanks (left) interviewed Chris and Carla Snopek about how Jesus brought them together, saved them, and has used them to grow each other in faith. See page 18.
columns 8 As I See It Marital fights, the Eagles, and turning conflict into character
10 Modern Motherhood Don’t dismiss a mother’s discernment
12 Mission Mississippi Moments How God used a relationship of deeper trust to help me forgive
14 This Is My Story Spiritual hindsight is 20/20
After her daughter was killed in 2017, Felecia Marshall founded a nonprofit aimed at helping mothers who’ve lost children to violence. See page 26.
16 A Cup of Encouragement A common thread makes treasured friends
29 Lagniappe
cover story
Support and socialization enhance life at St. Catherine’s
18 Chris and Carla Snopek
30 Food for Thought Comfort foods for cold weather
On love, faith and baseball
32 Health & Wellness
feature
Heart-healthy tips for Heart Month (and anytime!)
26 Felecia Marshall
33 Tough Questions
How God turned 1 woman’s tragic loss into a calling
I’m ready for kids — but my husband is not
in every issue
Coming next month 2022 Christian Leaders of the Future scholarship finalists
6 Editor’s Letter 34 Quips & Quotes 34 Advertiser Index
CONNECT WITH US: facebook.com/MSChristianLiving 4 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
instagram.com/MSChristianMag
ART/GRAPHIC DESIGN
Sandra Goff SALES
Suzanne Durfey, Ginger Gober, Dorothy Bachus CONTRIBUTING WRITERS
Dan Hall, Dr. Fred Hall, Courtney Ingle, Bishop Thomas Jenkins, Laura Lee Leathers, Elisa Mayo, Anna Claire O’Cain COVER PHOTOGRAPHY
Stegall Imagery DISTRIBUTION ASSISTANTS
Michelle and Randy Fortenberry, Rachel and Nettie Schulte, Jerri and Sammy Strickland, Rachel and Bob Whatley
Mississippi Christian Living P.O. Box 1819 Madison, MS 39130
601.790.9076 mschristianliving.com Mississippi Christian Living is committed to encouraging individuals in their daily lives by presenting the faith stories of others and by providing information that will point every person, at every stage of life, to a deeper, authentic, personal, and life-changing encounter with Jesus Christ. Views expressed in Mississippi Christian Living do not necessarily represent those of the publisher. Every effort has been made by the Mississippi Christian Living staff to insure accuracy of the publication contents. However, we do not guarantee the accuracy of all information nor the absence of errors and omissions; hence, no responsibility can be or is assumed. All Rights Reserved. Copyright 2022 by MS Christian Living, Inc. Mississippi Christian Living is published monthly and is available for free at hightraffic locations throughout the tri-county area. Subscriptions are $29 a year. POSTMASTER: Send change of address to Mississippi Christian Living, P.O. Box 1819, Madison, MS 39130.
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EDITOR’S LETTER
New pianos and Jesus
W
hen I was 12, I started taking piano lessons. Every Thursday for five years, I
A baby grand ...
CARLI ANN PHOTOGRAPHY
... and a baby pianist.
6 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
spent 30 minutes learning and playing music at Brian Faulkner’s house in Russellville, Arkansas. At home, my mom was glad my keyboard came with a headphone jack. As I improved, I started playing without headphones — but Mozart’s lively “Rondo Alla Turca” just about drove her crazy anyway. At one of my last piano recitals, maybe junior year of high school, I played “Rondo Alla Turca” (sorry, Mom!), and “Fallin’,” Alicia Keys’ first big hit. I messed up badly on “Fallin’” at one point, but overall I did pretty well. Still, I’m happy to report I no longer play recitals. It’s just not fun to try and play perfectly in front of a crowd. I played on my own throughout college. There were a bunch of practice rooms in the Ole Miss music building — each room no bigger than a guest bathroom and containing only an upright piano. I’d bring a stack of songbooks, whatever I was feeling that day, and play for hours on end. At some point after we moved to Mississippi, my parents got me a used Kawai baby grand. I was thrilled. Playing my old keyboard was like typing on a computer keyboard: The keys were light and easier to plunk down on than a real piano, but it wasn’t as satisfying, and it didn’t sound as good. But the newness wore off after a while. Now that I could play a real piano anytime I was home (within reason), I wasn’t as excited about it. I practiced less and less. I brought the baby grand with me when I moved to Jackson, and again when my parents helped me buy a house in Madison County. Still, though, I don’t play as often as I should. Yet every time I do, I remember how relaxing it is. Somehow, reading notes on a page and putting them together in a melody destresses me, even when I don’t play perfectly. When I do play, I don’t want to stop. I’ll show up late for social obligations or go to bed after midnight, all because I’m finally playing piano after a long dry spell. I still prefer to play alone. If others are
present, they may sing along, but they aren’t allowed to talk or ask me questions. It’ll throw me off. I get performance anxiety. Lately, I’ve tried to be more intentional about giving myself regular creative outlets. When I feel the urge to play piano, or color a picture (yes, I’m still on the coloring book fad), I do it, instead of waiting till my right brain is shriveled and parched. Sometimes my spiritual life has been like my journey with piano. At first, Sunday church was like my piano lesson, and sometimes I tried to perform well in front of others to show off what I knew. As I started discovering Jesus for myself, I pursued Him more; I stole away to secret rooms to spend time with Him. More recently, anytime I get a new Bible, I get really excited — only to discover it contains the same books, chapters and verses as always. The same 88 piano keys. I lose a little excitement and set the Word aside. It's right there. I can open it up anytime. I don’t have to do it right now. I once saw a video of believers receiving Bibles for the first time in a place where access to scripture is severely restricted. These Christians cried, kissed the cover of the Bible repeatedly, and held it to their chests. They were overjoyed. They were right to be. Just as a piano’s 88 keys can (and have been) combined into millions of different melodies, the Bible’s 66 books always contain fresh revelation for us. The Word will not return void (Isaiah 55:11), and it is useful for training us up into our purpose (2 Timothy 3:16-17). Most importantly, it’s one of the easiest and best ways to get to know our Savior. May we never take the Word of God for granted. It won’t do us any good if we never open it up and enjoy the beauty within.
Must-reads in this issue:
● Our cover story on Chris and Carla Snopek (page 18)
● Our feature story on a woman helping mothers who’ve lost children to violence (page 26) ● Dan Hall’s column on resolving marital conflicts (page 8) Y
Katie Eubanks katie@mschristianliving.com
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AS I SEE IT
by DAN HALL
Marital fights, the Eagles, and turning conflict into character
M
y Spotify account has one playlist simply entitled “Rock.”
The list includes most of my favorites between about 1968 to 1985. It encompasses an overlap from my older brothers’ years into my college years. It’s quite a montage that has grown to nearly 500 songs encompassing 34 hours of amazing sound! The selection spans from Led Zeppelin and John Denver to REO Speedwagon and Billy Joel. The Eagles are one of my top favorite bands (along with Boston). All of my kids will tell you that my favorite song from them is “Best of My Love.” There’s a particular line that reflects Don Henley’s amazing songwriting skills, as well as insight into the human condition: You see it your way, I see it mine But we both see it slipping away. Early in my ministry, I noted how many couples came in to see me saying, “We just don’t communicate.” However, over time I discovered that the problem wasn’t communication. Rather, the problem was they didn’t know how to solve the problems created by communication. I realized their problem was conflict resolution. They would communicate, but they didn’t know what to do with what they discovered through communicating! So I set out to learn conflict resolution. I eventually became proficient enough to begin training couples, and ultimately organizations, on skills to resolve conflict. There is no way a single 600-word article
could encapsulate all conflict resolution principles — but let me offer three that might help either in a highly toxic situation or as skills in daily life.
◼ Perspective creates as
much conflict as reality.
The older I get, the stronger this principle becomes to me. How I see a particular situation determines how I judge both the situation and the person involved. We must learn the pursuit of understanding. Ask questions like, “Help me understand why you think I feel that way,” or, “Help me understand what you hear me saying.” Listening intently to what they say rather than formulating my answer is a very important life skill!
◼ Less than 15 percent of our communication is comprised of words.
Every communication expert will tell you some form or relative percentage of this formula. There are so many things that go into how we communicate, including tone, volume, body language and eye contact. These and other factors are impacted by how I feel about this person or situation. The more toxic and volatile the situation, the more important considering these factors becomes. Little things like nodding our heads, communicating with our eyes, and not folding our arms or crossing our legs, can all mitigate misunderstandings.
◼ We fell in love for a reason.
When the list of grievances and frustrations begins to grow, discipline yourself to go back and remember why you fell in love. Something drew you to this person. Very often, that same attractive quality has become an irritation. “I loved how much fun I had with him” becomes, “He’s just so flippant about things!” “He was so romantic” becomes, “He can be so needy!” Make a list of at least three to five things you fell in love with about your spouse. Go back and celebrate those, and then pull them into today and ask the question, “Is what’s irritating me actually a reflection of one of his/her strengths?” Communication is an absolute imperative in a relationship. But that same imperative can contribute to deterioration without good conflict resolution skills. Read a book, see a counselor, go to a conference. Do something to cultivate the skills that help your relationship be stronger and last longer! Y
Dan Hall is an executive and strategic coach to leaders and executive teams. He also works with organizations on team building, conflict resolution and communication skills. He and his wife, Hazel, have six children and four grandchildren. You can reach him at Dan@OnCourseSolutions.com.
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mschristianliving.com ❘ FEBRUARY 2022 9
MODERN MOTHERHOOD
by ELISA MAYO
Don’t dismiss a mother’s discernment
H
ow can we know the number of times we have been spared tragedy by a feeling, a discerning nudge, or a fleeting thought? I think it would be awe-inspiring if we could see our “could-have-been” movie, showing us each step along the way when God whispered into our soul and pointed us in the right direction. We call this intuition, a gut feeling that leads us, but we know that it is something much more — a spiritual voice of love guiding us. Mothers are often cited with this intuition regarding the care of their children. It’s a feeling that has landed me more than once in opposition to those around me — even my husband. Hannah experienced this when her husband tried to take away her yearning for a child with the words, “Hannah, why do you weep, and why do you not eat, and why is your heart sad? Am I not better to you than ten sons?” (1 Samuel 1:8, NASB) Though Hannah’s husband’s words were true, they could not take away the deep desire, the whisper in Hannah’s heart that she was to give birth to a prophet of God. No more than when my child was sick and being helped by great medical staff, and my husband couldn’t change my mind and tell me that something more wasn’t needed. I felt that strong push that more could and should be done. Though I wrestled with understanding why, I knew that nudge from God, and I had to press forward with changing doctors even if it meant that my own husband did not understand. Looking back, it is clear that the help my daughter received prevented greater damage to her body, strengthened my faith in that nudge, and strengthened my husband’s faith in motherly intuition. Abigail experienced this when her husband insulted David, and David promised to destroy all that Abigail’s husband owned. Abigail quickly saw the folly of her husband’s insult and said to David, “Please do not let my lord pay attention to this worthless man, Nabal, for as his name is, so is he.” (1 Samuel 25:25a, NASB) David countered that it was Abigail’s discernment that spared all that her husband had. As a wife, we can serve as the protector of our husband’s earthly goods, including his children. 10 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
Elisa Mayo (top right) with her husband, Matt, and their kids, Alea and Trent.
I had a deep yearning to homeschool our children, but for years my husband was so vehemently opposed that he demanded no discussion on the subject. I prayed and cried to the Lord over and over. My heart was broken when my nudge and my reality did not meet. Days trickled by and my desire could not be quenched. In the wait, I read, I studied, and I prepared myself for what I knew was my calling. Finally, my husband relented and gave me one of the greatest gifts of my life — the ability to teach my children. Thankfully, I have a husband of great faith, one who was instrumental in bringing me back into the fold of the church some 25 years ago, and this makes me forever grateful that God uses me to care for such a great man. We know that our role as a helper to our husbands is a sacred one. Our covenant relationship demands that we support, love and obey our husbands. But no obedience is above our obedience to God, and that is
why, dear mother, we are to be prayerful, pliable, humble, and ready to be the wives and mothers we are called to be, even when our path seems shaky. When God speaks, listen. He isn’t training mothers and wives who are weak. He is training soldiers, industrious women, sold-out girls. Your godly assignment is an important one. The power of a wife who prays for her husband reaches God and makes a way — it changes things that seem impossible, and the reward is not just to you, mother, but to your husband. “The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.” (Proverbs 31:11, NASB) Y Elisa Mayo is a homeschool mom juggling working full-time with motherhood and marriage. She lives on a small farm with her husband and two kids.
First Baptist Jackson invites you to a night of worship and praise featuring Steve Green, along with the Grammy Award winners Dick and Mel Tunney and the FBJ Choir and Orchestra. Tickets not required.
mschristianliving.com ❘ FEBRUARY 2022 11
MISSION MISSISSIPPI MOMENTS
by BISHOP THOMAS JENKINS
How God used a relationship of deeper trust to help me forgive
O
ftentimes our past experiences affect how we handle relationships. If we have had great
relationships, there is really no problem or hesitancy in developing new ones. I grew up during the civil rights era. It was a time when there was major unfairness and persecution of African Americans. During this time, I had family members who were murdered and abused. For example, my grandfather was shot down in cold blood by a sheriff simply because he could not answer a question. My uncle was gunned down on a train when he did not respond when called the n-word. The persecution continued after my parents were grown and married and my brothers and sisters were born. One example of persecution was one evening when my family was sitting at the table having dinner. The sheriff knocked on the door and took my older brother to the jail. Someone had lied and said he’d said something ugly to a white girl. There was no proof, and he was released after the family that my sister worked for went to the jail and got the sheriff to let him go. This situation traumatized me because the jail where my brother was being held was known for beating black people badly. My family experienced more trouble when the white school in the community was integrated. It was a very difficult time. We were severely mistreated by the white students, and those in the school who should have protected me did nothing. In addition to this, my brother’s house was bombed and shot into. Thankfully, no one was hurt. In spite of this, we stayed in school and graduated. Needless to say, all this caused me to have unforgiveness in my heart and no trust in whites. After graduating from high school, these experiences led me to attend an all-black college. After earning my college degree, I went to work for a black-owned company. I was regional director and very successful. I had no desire to have meaningful relationships with people who did not look like me. What I did not realize was that I had hurt in my heart.
12 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
What changed me When I heard about Mission Mississippi, I said to myself that it was a waste of time and money. I was unfortunately speaking from a place of hurt. One day I attended a prayer meeting hosted by Mission Mississippi. At that meeting, I met a person whom I consider to be one of my best friends today. The gentlemen’s name was Lee Paris. Lee was a genuine Christian who loved the Lord, his family and mankind. I realized all of these things about him based on me observing him. We established a strong bond through praying and fellowshipping together on a regular basis. There were days that I found challenging and called Lee, and he and I would pray together about the particular challenge. He would always be there when I needed an ear. The same is true for me. There were days he would call me about sensitive issues that we would pray about together. One of the things that blessed me the most about Lee is that he drove from Oxford in a storm to visit me in the hospital in Jackson. That is what a true friend does. One of the most memorable times was when Lee and I were recognized during halftime at an Ole Miss football game. I will never forget that night when the fans honored us. My relationship with God and Lee has helped me to heal many of my past hurts and disappointments that were caused by racism. I thank God for using Mission Mississippi to bring us together. #DeeperTrust Y
Bishop Thomas Jenkins is a child of the King, pastor of New Dimensions Ministries, a current board member of Mission Mississippi, and chaplain for the Jackson Police Department. He and his wife have been married for 45 years and have four children and four grandchildren.
“ I grew up during the civil rights era. It was a time when there was major unfairness and persecution of African Americans. During this time, I had family members who were murdered and abused. (Later) I had no desire to have meaningful relationships with people who did not look like me. What I did not realize was that I had hurt in my heart.”
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THIS IS MY STORY
by COURTNEY INGLE
Spiritual hindsight is 20/20
“H
ey, can you share your testimony?”
“I don’t know, it’s kind of boring. You know the drill, raised in church, didn’t quite fully understand the magnitude of following God until adulthood, that kind of thing.” What if I was looking God dead in the face when I said that? “Yeah, thanks for your Son and all, I just don’t have much to say.” Wow. Open mouth, insert foot. I realized in that response, after a good Holy Spirit prompting, that I didn’t have an attitude of gratitude for the blessings I had been bestowed. The truth is, the biggest part of my testimony is that I now truly understand salvation as an ongoing demonstration of God’s love in action, not as a one-time event. Daily, I am saved. Constantly, I’m learning more about true salvation, more than just the Roman Road to Salvation. I’m learning that salvation means living in a constant state of surrender, trusting that you’ll be carried by the loving arms of a Father — just like when I used to fall asleep on the couch and my daddy would carry me to bed. God’s hand was always there, and in hindsight, it was obvious. I remember seeing a Bible on my grandma’s shelf and wanting to read it but not knowing how. We started going to church after my baby sister was born. I was 8. According to my mom, I had started asking about going to church. I was being drawn to Christ and I didn’t even know it. I remember taking a week to not watch TV after school in ninth grade. I’d go to my room,
journal, pray and listen to worship music. I’d forget where I was. I felt a power there, a connection to the presence of my Savior. Realness. Tangible. Fast forward to 2014. I was losing my job, one that I loved. I was about to be up a creek with a brand-spanking new mortgage and car note. My husband was in the process of looking for another job. I got a call out of nowhere to come work for a radio news organization in Jackson. My first day in Jackson, the official word came down that my former job at Southern Miss was being completely eradicated, and it hasn’t been replaced since. Total provision. Jehovah Jireh. Hop again to 2016. My husband and I had reached a point where we wanted a baby. But nature was being wonky, everyone else was getting pregnant, and I was getting angry. One day, during a rage-and-sinus-pressure-fueled trip to Walgreens, I got a coupon for baby formula expiring December 30, 2016 — which was two months later. The day a doctor confirmed my pregnancy. In August 2017, when I was 35 weeks pregnant, my father’s chains of depression and alcoholism were eternally broken when he passed away and was met with the arms of a loving Savior. Two things here — the pending birth of my daughter kept me from being consumed with grief. Also, finding my father’s little certificate of salvation and baptism he’d signed at a church event was like a little message from God saying, “He’s with Me; he’s not hurting anymore.” In October 2019, that same little girl who’d pulled me from the darkness of my father’s death was diagnosed with retinoblastoma.
Quickly, God showed His power to use evil for good, and through St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, we were paired with some of the best hands in the world. Honestly, when I look back, it looks like Jesus was calling to me from the waves for the past 24 years. “I’m here! Come to Me! You won’t drown! Walk to Me! Eyes up! Eyes up!” I’ve definitely not been a perfect Christian. I’ve gone days, months, without praying. I’ve gone longer without stepping foot in a church. I’ve sinned, I’ve let circumstances overtake me, I’ve let my emotions lead me, and I’ve made some pretty terrible choices. But I can honestly say, I’ve never felt abandoned by God. I’ve never doubted whether He was there. I’ve been a repeat prodigal, and He’s welcomed me with open arms. But this time, I’m seeing the evidence of being transformed. And the thing about transformation is that it’s not temporary. A butterfly, once it leaves the cocoon, can’t go back to being a caterpillar. It has to fly. “When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.” – 1 Corinthians 13:11 Y
Courtney Ingle and her husband, Jeremy, live in Crossgates in Brandon. They have a daughter, Taylor Scott, who is 4 years old, and a son, Jacob Leon, who is 6 months old. Courtney is a stay-at-home mom and homemaker and can be emailed at courtneyinglewrites@gmail.com.
JACKSON 2624 Southerland Street 601.336.4282
BRINGING GOSPEL HOPE TO VULNERABLE CHILDREN THROUGH: Adoption | Pregnancy Counseling Family Restoration | Global Orphan Care Education & Counseling 14 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
HATTIESBURG 7 Professional Parkway, Suite 103 601.264.4984 MERIDIAN 2401 9th Street 601.336.3066 LIFELINECHILD.ORG
If you aren’t sure whether you have a relationship with God or where you’ll go when you die, please don’t put this magazine down until you’ve read the following:
✝ THE PROBLEM
For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God. – Romans 3:23 For the wages of sin is death ... – Romans 6:23a The natural result and consequence of our sin is eternal death, or hell (Revelation 20:15), separated from God. This is because God is completely perfect and holy (Matthew 5:48), and His justice demands that sin be punished (Proverbs 11:21).
✝ THE SOLUTION
... but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. – Romans 6:23b But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. – Romans 5:8 Jesus Christ died in our place on the cross and took on the punishment for all our sins (Isaiah 53:4-6). Then God raised Him from the dead (John 20)!
✝ HOW TO RECEIVE SALVATION
If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. – Romans 10:9
✝ IS IT FOR ANYONE?
Trust in what Jesus has done for you — His death for your sins and His resurrection — and trust Him as Lord.
✝ THE RESULTS
For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. – Romans 10:13
Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. – Romans 5:1 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 8:38-39
✝ WHAT TO DO NEXT
So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God. – Romans 10:17 If you decided to trust in Jesus, grow in your faith by reading more of God’s Word in the Bible. We recommend the gospel of John (it comes just after Luke) as a good starting point — or Romans! Finding a church close to you that teaches faith in Christ is another important step. It’s crucial to spend time with other believers so we can encourage each other in our faith. If you have questions about anything on this page, please contact us at 601.896.1432, or send us a message on Facebook @MSChristianLiving, Instagram @mschristianmag or Twitter @MSChristLiving. mschristianliving.com ❘ FEBRUARY 2022 15
A CUP OF ENCOURAGEMENT
by LAURA LEE LEATHERS
A common thread makes treasured friends
“A
nne of Green Gables,” written by L.M. Montgomery, is a beautiful story about love and grace. Hopefully, you’ve read the book or watched the
original movie. One of my favorite things about the film is watching Anne Shirley, the main character, connect with shy Matthew Cuthbert. They understand each other — he’s her first kindred spirit. Later, we see Anne and Diana Barry become best friends — Diana is another kindred spirit. The following is one of my favorite quotes from the book: Kindred spirits are not too scarce as I used to think. It’s splendid to find out there are so many of them in the world.
My sentiments exactly! Throughout our lifetime, we all have the opportunity to meet and be involved in many people’s lives. Usually, we see people in three categories: acquaintances, friends, and best friends. There is a weaving and working process of friendships throughout our lives. Circumstances, such as a move, can change relationships and start new ones. Then there are those with whom the friendship goes deeper. That individual becomes our kindred spirit, a forever friend. I call these individuals my treasured friends. I’ve learned that most people have at least one close, intimate friend throughout their lifetime. Laura Lee Leathers (above, in red) and some of her treasured friends. Above left, Judy Arnold; below, Greg and Toni Ballard with their grandkids Sawyer and Josie.
Biblical examples We could spend hours studying friendships found throughout the Bible and what it means to be a friend. Also, we could look at the book of Proverbs for wisdom and warnings regarding choosing friends. Perhaps one of the best wellknown references to a kindred spirit Who is your is the relationship between Jonathan kindred spirit, and and David in 1 Samuel. In 1 Samuel who are your forever 18:1-4, NKJV, we read, “The soul of friends? ... This month Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his as we focus on love own soul.” They also made a covenant and relationships, between themselves. In the next take some time to chapter, 19:4, we read, “Jonathan write a note of spoke well of David to Saul his gratitude to them, father,” almost bragging. Then in 20:4, maybe with a Jonathan was willing to do whatever David needed. homemade card. Notice that their relationship was “knit to the soul.” To me, this means that there’s a God connection, a spiritual bond. He has brought lives together for His kingdom’s purposes. The spiritual goal for all of us is to know God and make Him known. Therefore, one of the roles of a kindred spirit is to help you stay focused on this mission. They also need to be an encourager, and bold enough to hold their friend accountable. Jonathan also
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16 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
More of Laura’s treasured friends, from left: Nancy Riser, Diane Cheatham, and Beth Truitt.
demonstrated a generous spirit. He was humble and unselfish. The apostle Paul took an entire chapter, Romans 16, to list his treasured friends, as well as others to avoid. He describes Phoebe as a helper to many. Priscilla and Aquila risked their lives for Paul. Apelles was approved in Christ, and Rufus was in the Lord. In this chapter, Paul lists more than 30 individuals. He mentions others by referring to all the saints, the households, fellow prisoners, and “all the saints who are with them” (verse 15).
A common thread As you read about Paul’s relationships, do you see the commonality? The common thread is Christ! When Jesus began His ministry, He called 12 men to follow Him. They became His friends (except for Judas). Peter, James and John were a part of His inner circle. Then in John 15, Jesus speaks about relationships. First a believer’s relationship to Him, then between believers, then with the world. Notice verse 14: “You are My friends if you do whatever I command you.” Our obedience is a testimony of our love for God and others.
Use the following words to help you start writing: Love ❤ Loyal ❤ Forgiving ❤ Hospitality Commitment ❤ Trustworthy ❤ Wise Accountability ❤ Prayer Warrior Encourager ❤ Laughter ❤ Teacher
Several years ago, while I was having lunch with friends, my friend’s husband prayed, “Thank You for these forever friends.” That sentence is one I’ve not forgotten. We were all in agreement. We were forever friends, not just here on our earthly journey, but throughout eternity! Y
With either a pen or a garden tool in her hand, Laura Lee focuses on her three passions: freelance writing, sharing and serving through hospitality, and cultivating Lady Laura's Garden. You can contact her at laura.l.leathers@gmail.com or visit her website, LauraLeeLeathers.com.
Scriptures on friendship
The friendship of the LORD is for those who fear him, And he makes known to them his covenant. Psalm 25:14, ESV
“He who covers a transgression seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates friends.” – Proverbs 17:9
(Additional references: Galatians 3:26-29, Ephesians 4:1-6, Ecclesiastes 4:9-12.)
“A man who has friends must himself be friendly, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” – Proverbs 18:24
Characteristics of a treasured friend
“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” – Proverbs 17:17
Take a moment and think about your friendships. Who is your kindred spirit, and who are your forever friends? What would you say are the qualities or characteristics of a friend? This month as we focus on love and relationships, take some time to write a note of gratitude to them, maybe with a homemade card.
“As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.” – Proverbs 27:17
mschristianliving.com ❘ FEBRUARY 2022 17
COVER STORY
by KATIE EUBANKS
Chris and Carla
Snopek On love, faith and baseball
“G
od used Carla to save my life, end of story.”
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When Chris Snopek talks, you listen — the Ole Miss alumnus and former pro baseballer’s voice is a couple octaves deeper than most — and then when he says something like that, you listen harder. Chris and Carla got saved within a day of each other, after five years of marriage, and they haven’t been the same since. Of course, they both looked great on the outside, even before that day in March 2000.
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Chris signing with Ole Miss, where he played from 1990 to 1992 and was All American and All SEC before being drafted by the Chicago White Sox.
Opposites attract Carla grew up in the Jackson metro area and “definitely had a belief in God, an awareness,” she says. “Seeds were definitely planted.” However, since she didn’t go to church very much, “I always felt a little out of place.” She’d attend Fellowship of Christian Athletes or Young Life activities with friends, but “there was no personal relationship (with Jesus),” she says. “Nobody would’ve known.” But she knew. When she met Chris at Ole Miss, “we were almost totally opposite,” she says.
“I was from Kentucky and I had a buzz cut, and I didn’t know anybody when I moved down here,” Chris says. His friends were baseball players. Hers were fraternity and sorority members. She was studious; he was not. And she knew something spiritual was missing in her life. But as a Catholic who attended mass every Sunday and holy day, Chris thought he was good. “I had a reverence for God, but no relationship. More routine,” he says. “There was nothing foundational in my life about love, relationship, the things God calls you to do.” He and Carla saw each other at a gathering
Snopek fans cheer Chris on at an Ole Miss baseball game in the early ’90s. 20 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
While dating, “Carla gave me a thought process outside of baseball,” Chris says.
“I’ve learned so much from her in 27 years of marriage,” Chris says of Carla.
Chris spent several years with the Chicago White Sox organization, including nearly three years with the Major League team.
with mutual friends shortly before their junior year, and “I was blown away,” Chris says. One of the things he loved about her? “She could care less that I played baseball.” Not that she was uninterested. “I just wasn’t a cleat chaser,” she explains. They had a class together junior year — “The Lord kept putting us together,” Chris says — and started dating. They’d go to the library so Carla could study, and Chris would grab a newspaper to read. “As if you’re not taking classes! As if you’re not also enrolled at this school!” Carla says now, laughing. She helped him focus on things other than baseball, like studying, and she was there the day the Chicago White Sox drafted him in 1992. “It was such a dramatic day,” Chris says. “I was supposed to go in the third or fourth round, and I wound up going in the sixth.” Carla proved to be a calming presence in the midst of that chaos, he says. The chaos only continued with Chris’ baseball career. After playing single A, AA and AAA, he moved up to the major league White Sox team in 1995, the same year he and Carla got married. He played for the White Sox for three years, played briefly for the Boston Red Sox in 1998, and then played on various AAA teams from 1998 to 2002, when he retired. “You could be moved (or traded) at any moment,” Carla says. And for the first several years of that life, she and Chris did not know Jesus. “I can’t believe how many years, actually, we went through the motions,” she says.
Chris was traded to Boston toward the end of the 1998 season. “You never knew when you could be moved,” Carla recalls.
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Chris played with Michael Jordan for the Birmingham Barons, a Double-A Chicago White Sox team, in 1994, during Jordan’s brief foray into baseball. Chris was voted team MVP.
Chris recreates the two pie charts, drawn by Tim Cash, that helped lead him to Christ.
A crazy move When their first child, Kate Russell, was born in Chicago in August 1998, she came early, and Chris was in California. (Carla delivered at 11 a.m., and Chris was there by 5.) Ten days later, “I have a brand-new baby that I have no idea what to do with,” Carla says. “I had taken Chris to the airport, and that was a whole ordeal with the car seat — and then he calls and says, ‘You’re never going to believe this, but I’ve been traded.’ “I said, ‘When are you coming home (to help me move)?’ And he never did.” Instead he had to report immediately to
Boston, where he’d be playing for the Red Sox. Carla then had to sell the furniture they’d purchased in Chicago. She put an ad in the paper, people came and fought over the furniture, and she developed a fever — probably from stress, she says now. The baby got a fever, too. The next day, their plane spent three hours on the runway, with Kate Russell crying much of the time. “But then it was so much fun (when we got there),” Carla says. “I loved Boston.” One huge blessing: “Chris played with a guy, Jason Bere, who’d just been traded to Cleveland, mschristianliving.com ❘ FEBRUARY 2022 21
and they’d just had a baby too, and they said, ‘Just come stay in our house (in Boston).’” They continued enjoying life for the next couple of years. Carla was a dietician but took time off while the kids were little. She and Chris had “a fun marriage,” he says. Sure, there was lots of pressure to perform as an athlete, but they seemed to have a good life. Then March 2000 happened.
From baseball to babysitting — and belief
“He’s been an extremely good example to our kids,” Carla says of Chris. “He’s an amazing vessel for so many kids, not just (ours).” Above, from left: Chris, Carla, John Whit, Lydia, Kate Russell, and Christopher Snopek. Below: Chris (far right) talks to young athletes at P360.
22 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
Chris, Carla and Kate Russell were in Orlando for spring training with the Kansas City Royals. “Then they called me into their office and said, ‘We’re going to send you to minor league camp,’” Chris recalls. It was the worst career blow he’d ever experienced. Fortunately, God already had the people in place who would bring him and Carla through this trial — and lead them to Christ. First, “there was this player, Mike Sweeney, who was a Christian who lived in our apartment complex,” Carla says. “Chris would say, ‘He’s always playing this Christian music.’ He (had) invited us to a Bible study that was for anyone at spring training.” They’d gone a couple times, but “Chris was adamant ... ‘I know God.’” The same day Chris learned he was being demoted, Carla was at a Bible study just for the players’ wives, led by a lady named Barbara Cash. “I stayed after to talk to Barb,” Carla says. “I said, ‘I just don’t feel like I have this personal relationship (with Jesus that) everybody has.’” Barb’s reply caught Carla off guard: “You could pray to receive Christ in your life right now.” She laid out the foundational truths of the gospel — sin that separates us from God, Jesus paying for that sin so we can be made right with Him — and Carla decided to follow Jesus. “Then (that same day) Chris came home devastated. I’d never seen him that down,” Carla says. She hung on to Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” She tried to point her husband to that hope: “Chris, you’ve got to hear about my day. We can get through this.” “I was consumed with baseball,” Chris says. “I’m thinking, ‘Carla, I’m trying to make a team here.’” But he still had two days to report to minor league camp. So the next day, Carla volunteered him to watch all the kids at Barb’s house while the wives had Bible study. “So I went from playing against Derek Jeter to babysitting a bunch of 3-year-old kids,” Chris says with a laugh. Afterward he went to lunch with Barb’s
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Carla teaches sixth grade at a program for homeschoolers that meets at First Baptist Jackson.
husband, Tim, who asked, “Do you know what it means to glorify God?” Chris said yes. After all, he’d been a churchgoer. He believed in God. “Then (Tim) drew this pie chart,” Chris says. “He said right now I had baseball, family, God was part of it, and then I think he included some hobby or something (each as pieces of my pie). Then he drew another pie chart (with God in the middle). He said, ‘Are you glorifying God in every aspect of your life?’ Well, no.” Chris gave his life to Christ over lunch that day. In his mind, he thought, “Might as well try it.” Then he spent the next few hours reading the Bible. “It completely took the monkey off my back — don’t you think?” he says, turning to
Carla. “In pro sports, it’s all about how you perform. With Jesus, it’s all about Him.” Carla agrees. “He had more of the works (mentality before). Everything was about how well you did.” Now he and Carla were radically changed. And good thing, because for the next two years, baseball life “was a constant battle.”
‘We were so hungry’ Shortly after he and Carla received Christ, Chris signed with the Seattle Mariners organization and played for their AAA Tacoma Rainiers team. “A baseball clubhouse can be dark — there were (explicit) magazines everywhere,” he says. “But the Holy Spirit was with me. I would spend time reading the Bible.
“Having the Lord as our foundation, it gave us a chance to get through (the challenges of baseball),” he says. “I’m thankful God intervened. (As a pro athlete, usually) it’s all about you.” “Your whole perspective changed,” Carla says. “It made me over the next 12 months realize, I’ve got to get my priorities (straight),” Chris says. When he and Carla were home in Jackson, they started visiting churches anytime they could. “We were just so excited to hear the Word,” Chris says. “We’d go down (afterward) and meet with the pastor (and say) ‘Thank you so much.’” Carla says she and Chris grew quickly in their faith, “because we were so — ” “ — hungry,” Chris finishes. They joined Highlands Presbyterian Church mschristianliving.com ❘ FEBRUARY 2022 23
STEGALL IMAGERY
in Ridgeland in the early 2000s and have loved being part of the community there. “I feel like we’re constantly being nurtured,” Carla says. Meanwhile, their new faith helped their marriage grow. “We were always floundering (before) on what we were doing, where we were going,” Carla says. “And (then) Chris was just really radically changed. Chris is the kind of person, when he hears and he knows — he’s in. “I’m a dietician, and every now and then I’ll (eat something unhealthy) anyway. But he was really quick to let God take over and go, ‘No, that’s not right’ (when it came to spiritual matters).” “I think it was because I could look back on how dark it was before,” he explains. As a traveling baseball player who didn’t know the Lord, he’d treated marriage, for instance, like a piece of his pie chart, no more. “(Faith) gave us a foundation,” he says. “It gave me accountability: This is my role as a husband, as a father.” And he and Carla have learned from each other. “She’s been a person I can go to (who will) help me stay positive,” Chris says. “I learned that through her, and through the Word, and through people here in Jackson, friends.” Carla admires his dedication to scripture. “There are not that many people who get out their Bible and read it like a book — no matter what’s going on in his life. It’s inspiring to me when I’m tempted to let that go for the day,” she says. 24 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
Chris is matter-of-fact about it: “It’s been my manual,” he says. He just knows he needs it. In the same way, “with our kids, we knew we wanted to start them out with the Word, craving that spiritual milk,” he says. Carla says Chris has been “an extremely good example to our kids. He is a great dad.” She recalls him taking the kids to elementary school and going over the armor of God with them from the book of Ephesians, piece by piece. “He’s an amazing vessel for so many kids, not just our kids.”
‘Don’t wait till you’re 30’ As a pro baseball player, you only get paid when you’re playing. So when Chris was home in Jackson from October to February, he needed a way to make money. A lot of folks asked him to help their kids learn how to hit. He saw an opportunity and partnered with Chris Lotterhos, who’d played at Mississippi State University and AAA ball, and in 2001 they opened Performance Sports Academy (now P360 Performance Sports), a baseball training academy that also hosts teams, leagues and tournaments. At first it was just a way to make money in the off-season. “I think around the third or fourth year, I realized it’s a ministry,” Chris says. By then he’d retired and was focusing full time on the business. His favorite scripture — one he came across after getting saved and immediately gripped onto — is Acts 4:12, “Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under
heaven given to mankind by which we must be saved.” “We don’t throw the gospel on kids, but we’ll put that scripture on our emails and our website. We want kids to feel comfortable and not pressured,” he says. “I try to use (that scripture a lot). Then people will start asking questions. ‘What do you mean by that?’” In the meantime, “Chris has a way of building people up and encouraging them,” Carla says. Chris explains that he had to do that for himself as an athlete: “You have to train your brain: ‘You can do this.’ That helps me share that with kids.” Hundreds of athletes who’ve trained under Chris have gone on to play baseball and softball in college, and some have gone pro. Now some players are bringing their own kids back to him. “I guess that’s a sign you’re getting old,” Chris deadpans. Athletics has changed so much in the last 20 years. Of course high-schoolers train in order to make the college team, he says. But now, “middle-schoolers are training just to make the high school team. There’s so much pressure on young people. You want to let them know, don’t wait till you’re 30 to know Jesus.” Chris also is a part-time hitting and bench coat at Madison-Ridgeland Academy, a school he says he gravitated toward because of its Christian worldview. Carla works part time as a dietician for Essential Touchstones Psychological Services in Ridgeland, and also teaches sixth grade at “the Friday program” for homeschoolers, which meets at First Baptist Jackson. “That’s my little joy job that I can’t give up,” she says. Much of this interview, and indeed many of the outward “moves” in the Snopeks’ lives, has focused on Chris’ career. Carla doesn’t seem to mind. “She’s humble, but besides Jesus, she’s been the leading thread in our family,” Chris says. “She helped raise four kids and supported me with our business.” As he said, God used her to save his life. If she hadn’t invited him to babysit some kids at Barb and Tim Cash’s house, he might be eternally separated from Christ. And God has used Chris and Carla to influence each other as they’ve both grown in their faith. “It’s still a challenge,” Chris admits. Nobody gets it right all the time. But most importantly? Through he and Carla’s journey, “(God has put) our kids in a position where they can share (Jesus) with those in the community, and with our grandkids.” That’s a pretty tasty pie chart, right there.
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mschristianliving.com ❘ FEBRUARY 2022 25
FEATURE STORY
by ANNA CLAIRE O’CAIN
The last photo Felecia took of Alexia before she was killed in March 2017.
After her daughter Alexia was murdered, Felecia Marshall started Grant Me Justice, a nonprofit dedicated to giving victims’ families a voice and helping them with counseling and legal aid.
From mourning to dancing How God turned 1 woman’s tragic loss into a calling
T
he story of Grant Me Justice begins with a tragedy that no mother would ever dream of having to endure: the loss of a child.
Felecia Marshall, Prentiss native and mother of the late Alexia Krushét Buckhalter, shares how God turned her mourning into dancing through her work with her nonprofit organization — which provides grief counseling, legal help, and a platform for mothers to share the stories of children taken too soon. 26 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
“Grant Me Justice was started (after) my daughter was murdered in March of 2017,” Felecia says. “Through that process, it took three years for me to get man’s justice in regard to my daughter. “Once that process was complete, I felt — and I use this term all the time — I felt like I had been raped. I felt like a virgin that had been raped. I felt like I did not have a voice. I was not familiar with the criminal justice system (and) I had not even been in court before. ... I felt like there was no one that could
speak for me — no one that would listen, no one that cared to even listen. “Through that process, I said, ‘You know what? Number one, I am going to write this story. I’m going to tell this story.’ Number two was, ‘I know I am not the only mother that feels this way.’” As Felecia started writing out her story, she thought about Jesus’ parable in Luke 18 about the persistent widow going before the unjust judge and saying, “Grant me justice.” That’s where the name of her organization came from — and it’s also the name of her book, which should be out in March of this year. “The scripture actually talks about persistent prayer, but the reality of it is that we all need Jesus. The only justice that we can get — really get — is the justice that God gives,” Felecia says. “My hope then became not what I got here, but what God would do.” Another thing that happened as Felecia went through the legal proceedings: “I was moved with compassion for the mother on the other side,” she says. “I embraced one of the mothers (of the killers) — we wept together because none of us asked to be there. Then I had to come to the realization that God’s grace and mercy and what Christ did on the cross was for all of us, even for the murderers of my daughter.” As Felecia shared her story and ministered to others after Alexia’s death, she realized she probably needed to form an official ministry. So, Grant Me Justice, the organization, was born. “I have been a believer for over 20 years now, and I have always wondered what my purpose was here on this earth,” Felecia says. “I tell you I’m not celebrating the loss of my
Above and below right: Monthly meetings of Grant Me Justice offer information and support.
daughter, but it took that in order for me to get into the perfect will of God. I know without a shadow of a doubt this is my purpose.”
Listening, counseling and sharing the gospel “When I initially started Grant Me Justice, my desire was number one to tell the story, because most people think a homicide is just a number,” Felecia says. “For my baby, she was number 14 (murdered in Jackson that year). You know, we are numbers. “What happens most of the time is once the funeral is over, everyone else goes back to their lives ... and we are left with this big void in our hearts,” she says. “I wanted mothers to have the opportunity to tell the world about their child. What was his favorite color? Was he athletic? What was his favorite food? “And I wanted it to be professionally done. I
would interview, I would go to different homes, I would travel all over the state and take a videographer with me, and we would interview mothers. We would edit it down to a two- to three-minute video just for people to be able to see and to be able to look into the lives of these faces and these names and these numbers so people can know who they are,” she says. “That helped with my grieving process with me being able to tell my story.” Another crucial service offered by Grant Me Justice is counseling. “(Counseling) is very, very important to the healing process,” Felecia says. “In the African American community there is a big stigma about counseling, but it is so needed. When you have witnessed your child with two gunshot wounds to the head, you need (counseling). When you’ve seen a child’s body, when you’ve only seen the bones — you have
In December, Grant Me Justice held a Just Us Giving event. With the help of their partners, they were able to give gift cards and gift baskets to mothers who’d lost children to violent crime. mschristianliving.com ❘ FEBRUARY 2022 27
and they need to get their legal documents to adopt their grandchildren.” No ministry can provide all these services without help, and Grant Me Justice has been blessed to partner with Jackson Leadership Foundation and Redeemer Church. “The Lord has just blown my mind with these partners,” she says excitedly. “This past December we were able to give gift baskets to moms. We were able to serve 20 mothers, which is amazing to me. We gave them gift cards and we gave them gift baskets and we gave them Bibles. It’s just beautiful to see. (Redeemer) helped us with the gift baskets, and they are helping supplement some of the fees associated with counseling.” Jackson Leadership Foundation is helping via leadership support, capacity-building services, and an online platform providing connections to potential donors and volunteers.
Turning mourning into dancing
Felecia (center) at an August 2021 event honoring mothers who’d lost children to violence.
mothers that the only thing they have to grasp onto is the baby’s bones — you need counseling.” The third service offered by Grant Me Justice is legal counsel, meaning “someone to help navigate through the criminal legal system to tell us what we have to accept and what we don’t,” Felecia says, “to walk us through the process, for our voices to be heard, for prosecutors to know that we don’t want to accept 15 years (for the killer), we don’t want to accept five years. “Because I tell you, if you’ve never been in the criminal legal system, everything about it is scary. You are grieving as you are going through the process, and you don’t know what your rights are. Over the past five years, Grant Me Justice has given Felecia an even more powerful opportunity: to share the gospel with grieving mothers. “Most of the mothers that I come in contact 28 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
with do not know Jesus. So a lot of it is discipleship and being able to walk alongside these mothers, to build their trust enough for me to be able to share the gospel,” she says. “A big part of it is that and being able to provide tangible resources. For instance, “if you are a person that does not know Jesus, then that probably means that you do not have a church family ... So if you’ve lost your child, then that means that you don’t have a group of people around you that is loving you and caring for you ... You don’t have a place to bury your child. You don’t have a place to even have a funeral.” On the other end of the spectrum, “some (mothers) just need to know how to get on Zoom,” she chuckles. “Then there are others like today. One called today needing some help with completing her victim’s compensation packet and she needed a CPA. Then there are others that now they’re raising their grandchildren
“It’s beautiful to see how God can take mourning and turn it into dancing,” Felecia says. “Grant Me Justice is God’s thing. It really is. God blows my mind. “It doesn’t mean that I don’t miss my baby, because I do. I miss her a lot. But it gives me great joy to be able to have a mother on the other end of the phone upset and about to tear the world upside down, and I’m able to tell her my story and tell her what God has done through my life. “And for her to be calm when I tell her to breathe, and I can just hear her on the phone taking a deep breath (when I’m) allowing her to breathe, then sharing with her about the goodness of the Lord and about the peace only God can give.” Felecia offers the following words of encouragement to grieving mothers and family members: “The one thing that sticks out in my mind that helped me was, laugh when you can laugh; cry when you need to cry. Because there are going to be a lot of days that you are going to cry. So when you get those opportunities to laugh, it’s important to laugh. ... The other thing is, if you are a believer, don’t grieve as one who does not have hope. It’s important for us to grieve as if we have hope.” For more information about Grant Me Justice, call 601.249.8694 or visit grant-me-justice.org.
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LAGNIAPPE
submitted by ST. CATHERINE’S VILLAGE
Support and socialization enhance life at St. Catherine’s
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s they age, many people feel that living in their current home or with family is the best option for them to retain their independence. But doing so has become challenging in today’s world, where getting out and about carries with it restrictions, rules and risks. Life Plan Communities, on the other hand, can offer seniors a richer lifestyle by combining socialization, stimulation and support in an allinclusive setting. One such Life Plan Community is St. Catherine’s Village in Madison. Located on 160 picturesque and wooded acres, St. Catherine’s provides the right care at the right time through independent living, assisted living, memory care, and skilled nursing — all in a protected environment. As one of Mississippi’s preeminent senior living communities, St. Catherine’s has numerous measures in place to minimize health risks while providing high-quality care and much-needed social interaction for residents. That’s because studies have shown that staying socially active supports a senior’s overall wellbeing by reducing stress and anxiety, and lowering the likelihood of depression, which often stems from isolation. Since the start, St. Catherine’s Village’s response to the pandemic has been swift and well-orchestrated to minimize impact within the community. Today the staff continues to demonstrate its ability to grow and adapt to the changing environment to achieve positive outcomes. They have made exceptional efforts to
keep residents engaged and connected to family and friends, with countless life-enriching activities and events like music, art and devotion offered in a safe, fun and relaxing manner. Support groups also are available, as are chapel services, to nurture residents’ spiritual lives. For physical health, the Life Plan Community provides exercise classes and wellness programs. An added benefit at St. Catherine’s is that residents can experience the outdoors. Lakes can be enjoyed through fishing and passive recreation, while views of the water from indoor spaces are maximized as much as possible. Walking paths are available and accessible for all. Becoming a Life Plan Community resident allows seniors to direct their own futures and
better plan for life’s uncertainties. As such, they can move from independent living to assisted living to nursing or memory care as needed — all within the comfort and familiar setting of St. Catherine’s. Knowing they will have a smooth transition as their level of care changes with age brings comfort to both residents and their families. If you or a loved one are 62 or older, St. Catherine’s Village might be the ideal senior living opportunity for today and in the future. To learn more about senior living options at St. Catherine’s, visit StCatherinesVillage.com or call 601.856.0123 to schedule a one-on-one tour. Y
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(601) 856-0123 www.StCatherinesVillage.com mschristianliving.com ❘ FEBRUARY 2022 29
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
recipes by ELISA MAYO
Comfort foods for cold weather
S
ometimes, when the weather is frigid and you want to warm up, there’s nothing like going back to the basics. We asked our friend Elisa Mayo (who wrote
this month’s Modern Motherhood column on page 10) to share some of her favorites with us. Any of these would be perfect to enjoy in front of a roaring fire! Y
BEST-EVER LASAGNA MEAT SAUCE: 1 tablespoon olive oil 1 onion, chopped 4 garlic cloves, minced 2 pounds hamburger meat 3 tablespoons tomato paste 2 beef bouillon cubes ½ teaspoon sugar Salt and pepper to taste WHITE CHEESE SAUCE: 4 tablespoons butter ¼ cup flour 3½ cup milk 1 cup parmesan cheese
CORNBREAD 4 1 ¾ 1 2 1½
tablespoons melted butter cup cornmeal cup self-rising flour tablespoon sugar eggs, beaten cups buttermilk
Preheat oven to 425 degrees. Place greased cast iron skillet in oven. Mix all ingredients together until incorporated. Do not over-stir. Pour mixture into heated skillet. Bake 20 to 25 minutes. Cool 10 minutes and turn cornbread out onto a plate.
CAKE-MIX COOKIES 1 box cake mix (any flavor) 2 eggs ¼ cup oil
Mix all ingredients together. Stir in chocolate chips or nuts if desired. Drop by teaspoon-full onto cookie sheet. Bake 5 minutes at 350 degrees until set.
No-boil lasagna noodles
Brown hamburger meat and drain. Place olive oil and onion in saucepan. Cook until onion is tender. Add hamburger meat and all other ingredients for meat sauce. Cook together 10 to 15 minutes. In a separate saucepan, melt butter. Add flour and cook 1 to 2 minutes, stirring constantly. Slowly add milk, stirring constantly. Sauce will thicken after a few minutes. Add parmesan. Stir until fully incorporated. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spoon a layer of meat sauce into bottom of a 9x13-inch baking pan. Cover with single layer of lasagna noodles. Layer with meat sauce, then white cheese sauce, then more lasagna noodles. Continue layering until you end with meat sauce, then cheese sauce. Bake 25 minutes.
30 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
Elisa Mayo is a homeschool mom juggling working full-time with motherhood and marriage. She lives on a small farm with her husband and two kids.
Hol y T r i n i t y Anglican Church Come worship with us Sundays at 10 a.m. Sunday school for all ages at 9 a.m.
432 Bozeman Road • Madison, Mississippi
mschristianliving.com ❘ FEBRUARY 2022 31
HEALTH & WELLNESS
by KATIE EUBANKS
Heart-healthy tips for Heart Month (and anytime!) Terry Sensing is a registered nurse in the Healthy Heart program at St. Dominic Hospital. She recently spoke with MCL Editor Katie Eubanks about heart health. Katie Eubanks: First off, what kinds of illnesses can lead to heart disease? Terry Sensing: Uncontrolled hypertension, diabetes, inflammation in general, that can affect your arteries and cause the plaque to build up more. And that’s why it can be prevented, because we can control our blood pressure, diabetes and cholesterol. We used to say if your blood pressure was 140 over 90, you need blood pressure medicine. Now if it’s over 130 on the top and 80 on the bottom consistently, you need medicine. The goal is still 120 over 80. The majority of the people, particularly in Mississippi, do not meet that.
KE: Does stress affect heart health? TS: Definitely. Stress increases your cortisol levels, and that can cause inflammation. (It’s important) to manage that stress with exercise, meditation, prayer.
KE: Tell me about St. Dominic’s $99 Healthy Heart Screening.
Registered nurse Terry Sensing stands by a CT scan at St. Dominic’s.
TS: You don’t have to have a doctor’s order. You will have of course your blood pressure checked, and we check cholesterol numbers and your blood sugar. We do an EKG and check the rhythm of your heart. We check for stroke risks and risks of peripheral vascular disease. We do a CT scan and check for plaque in the arteries. We have same-day results. You’re with the nurse the whole time, and we go over it with you. There’s time for some nutritional counseling (as well). We have a location in Madison and then in the Dominican Plaza across the street from the hospital. We have saved lives. It’s amazing how many people come in who do not know they have heart disease. Several have had to have openheart surgery. Heart disease can be prevented. Just because you have a strong family history (of heart disease), or risk factors, doesn’t mean you’re going to have heart disease, because being proactive can save your life.
KE: Besides managing stress and getting screened, what can you do to keep your heart healthy?
KE: What are the symptoms of a heart attack, and how are they different for women? TS: The common symptoms are going to involve a heavy type feeling in the chest, like an elephant sitting on your chest. It makes you short of breath, you get nauseated, break out in a sweat. Those are classic. So if you have those symptoms, immediately dial 911. Don’t drive yourself to a hospital. Have someone else drive you. Sometimes women don’t get the chest pain, and they’re just short of breath and dizzy. They might have pain between their shoulder blades, high abdominal pain. It can mimic indigestion. Therefore a lot of times you talk yourself out of going (to the hospital). But any upper body pain that comes on suddenly and lasts longer than five minutes should be addressed.
32 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
TS: First of all, no smoking. Smoking is one of the leading causes of heart disease. Also a heart-healthy diet with lots of fiber, fruits, vegetables, and then low sodium. People over 51 really only need about 1500 milligrams of sodium a day. And that’s hard. So you have to read your labels. And I can’t stress enough the importance of exercise. Thirty minutes a day, five days a week is what the American Heart Association recommends. Of course obesity is a huge risk factor. So keeping your weight under control is a good way to prevent heart disease. One thing we haven’t touched on is family history. Like if your mother or father had a heart attack or stroke, particularly in their early years, you need to get a screening — because genetics plays a big role. And age. Women over 55 and men over 45 are more at risk.
KE: Is there anything about heart health that people would be surprised to learn? TS: More women die from a heart attack than men do, mainly because the symptoms are harder to distinguish. I would say the thing that most people don’t realize is that it’s preventable. Nobody cares more about your heart than you do. So you have to take control over your choices. And you can make small choices daily. I was surprised when I started really studying more about this, just how you can change your numbers. Cholesterol numbers can be changed with diet and exercise. To schedule a Heart Healthy Screening at St. Dominic, call 601-200-8000. Y
TOUGH QUESTIONS
A LAWYER’S TRUE THRILLER ABOUT
by DR. FRED HALL, LPC
“The Greatest Love Story Ever Told!”
I’m ready for kids — but my husband is not QUESTION: My husband and I agreed to start our family after three years of marriage. It’s been three years, I’m ready, but he says he’s not. I’m so upset. What do I do? ANSWER: Thanks for the question, and let me say that I can understand how frustrating and unnerving this must be. What seems like a joyous and hope-filled occasion to produce life together as a couple, now feels like deception and hope deferred. I would first want you to pray through your own emotional wellbeing during this time of uncertainty and waiting. Ask God to give you peace and patience as you await His perfect timing in family planning. Talk with your husband about his change in attitude and his readiness for starting a family. Children and all that comes with them mean lots of things to lots of people. Spend some time sharing both of your feelings, ideas, and dreams for children. My suspicion is that his change of heart regarding starting the family may have something to do with nerves, fear, finances, perceived disruption of his and/or your plans, the current state of the world, or a shift in priorities. Even so, it’s worth discussing and coming to an agreement again. Share what children mean to you and what his change of plan conveys to you about your family. Share that this is more than just family planning but also trust and acceptance of each other’s intentions. To change that is a breach of trust, security and intimacy. That breach will need to be repaired in order to move forward in a healthy way. Talk to other couples in the same age or
“ Talk with your husband about his change in attitude and his readiness for starting a family. Children and all that comes with them mean lots of things to lots of people. Spend some time sharing both of your feelings.
”
relationship stage as you are. See what things are important to them and how they deal or navigate around it. Seek out godly counsel from others in your church regarding support, resources, or medical, financial or emotional aid. Be honest and open with your husband. Don’t acquiesce simply for the sake of honoring your husband’s wishes to the detriment of your own. Be genuine and authentic even during this time. Pray with and for your husband and your relationship to be strengthened during this time. Pray that no root of bitterness will be established. And have fun and enjoy each other. Children are only one part of a healthy and thriving marriage relationship. Y
No other set of books, except the Bible, will prepare the reader for an abundant life NOW and for a glorious ETERNITY better than Hallelujah, Love & War and The Sound of Glorious Marriage Music. These books can be reviewed and purchased at amazon.com. Select Books and type in “by Joe Ragland.”
ATTY JOE RAGLAND, J.D., LL.M., LL.D. Personal Injury Trial Attorney/Workplace Injuries Tel. 601-969-5050 • Info: www.raglandministries.org Click CONTACT to subscribe to Ragland Newsletters
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Dr. Fred Hall is a licensed professional counselor (LPC), supervisor, life and leadership coach and consultant. He works with individuals, couples, families and organizations in training, speaking, consulting and clinical practice. He does clinical work at Cornerstone Counseling in Jackson.
601.609.5540
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THE NATIONAL FIRE PROTECTION ASSOCIATION RECOMMENDS THAT EVERY FIREPLACE BE INSPECTED ANNUALLY.
mschristianliving.com ❘ FEBRUARY 2022 33
QUIPS & QUOTES ADVERTISER INDEX
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CUT OUT THE SCRIPTURES AND QUOTES AND PLACE THEM AROUND YOUR HOME FOR DAILY ENCOURAGEMENT!
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ADVERTISING PARTNERS
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Belhaven University...................................................2
Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. ~ ECCLESIASTES 4:12, NIV
Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away. If one were to give all the wealth of his house for love, it would be utterly scorned.
C Spire .................................................................................3
Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing. ~1 THESSALONIANS 5:11, ESV
Capital Ortho...................................................................9
Fireplace Chimney Sweep Solutions........33
First Baptist Jackson ...............................................11
Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
Hartfield Academy.....................................................11
~ JOHN 15:13, NIV
Holy Trinity Anglican Church.............................31
~ SONG OF SOLOMON 8:7, NIV
Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. ~ 1 PETER 4:8, NIV
No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. ~ 1 JOHN 4:12, NIV
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. ~ JOHN 13:34, ESV
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. ~ EPHESIANS 5:21, NIV
Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. ~ ROMANS 12:9-10, ESV
34 FEBRUARY 2022 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity. ~ PROVERBS 17:17, NIV
Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.
Joe Ragland .................................................................33
Lifeline Children’s Services ................................14
Madison-Ridgeland Academy..........................9
Mascagni Wealth Management ...................36
Miskelly Furniture ........................................................5
~ EPHESIANS 4:2-3, NIV
Mission Mississippi...................................................13
There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.
P360 Performance Sports..............................25
Pine Grove Treatment Center ............................7
~ 1 JOHN 4:18, ESV
Southern Farm Bureau Life Insurance
Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate. ~ MARK 10:9, NIV
And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. ~ COLOSSIANS 3:14, ESV
We love because he first loved us.
Company......................................................................31
St. Catherine's Village ...........................................29
St. Dominic's ................................................................35
Stegall Imagery...........................................................31
Sunnybrook Estates .................................................8
Superior Foundation Services .......................25
~ 1 JOHN 4:19, ESV
Twin Lakes ........................................................................9
WE CAN GET YOU MOVING. BUT ONLY YOU CAN TELL US WHERE YOU’LL GO.
Half of your healthcare is in the stories you share with us. Because before you’re a patient, you’re a person – and what you’re thinking, feeling, and hoping for can help us to personalize your recovery and improve your outcome. stdom.com/WeListenWeHeal