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SEPTEMBER 2009

The

Father/Daughter bond: Why it matters

Food and fun at POPS in Arcadia Fall tours abound in the Wichita Mountains Get your kids involved in volunteering

2 much txting?

Strategies to help your teen unplug Where the money is: finding financial aid for college

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September 2009

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Finding a copy of your favorite local family resource has never been easier!

MetroFamily is now at all OKC area )PNFMBOE TUPSFT t $SFTU TUPSFT t +JNNZ T &HH MPDBUJPOT t :.$" CSBODIFT 5BO BOE 5POF MPDBUJPOT "MM BSFB MJCSBSJFT (MetroLibrary System and Pioneer Library System)

The Top Five Reasons to visit MetroFamilyMagazine.com this month:

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You can also enjoy the convenience of a subscription for only $18.95 per year.

Call 405-340-1404 (ext 2) or go to MetroFamilyMagazine.com/Subscribe.

Sign up to get connected with MetroFamily and have more FAMILY FUN! t Subscribe to E-Update, MetroFamilyMagazine.com/Subscribe-ToE-Update t Follow us at Twitter.com/metrofamily t Become a fan at Facebook.com/metrofamily Enter our monthly giveaway featuring a grand prize of fun products valued over $450! MetroFamilyMagazine.com/Contests Many more articles about tweens/teens (and the parents who love them) are online at MetroFamilyMagazine.com/September-2009. Articles about teen sex, teen rudeness and family meetings as well as numerous parenting book reviews are included.

Sign up for the Trendy Momma Tweetup on September 24, 6:30-8:30, at MetroFamilyMagazine.com/Trendy-Momma-Tweetup. Connect with other moms while learning about the latest hair styles, fashions and other “trendy” topics.

Join up with other “Iron Moms” and learn how to increase your health quotient at MetroFamilyMagazine.com/Iron-Moms. As a team, our Iron Moms are running and walking at the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure.

Learn how you can get moving and get involved at our landing page.

Have more family fun! Visit the award-winning MetroFamilyMagazine.com

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natural playground waiting to be explored

z High Adventure Treasure Hunt z Hayrides z “Bone Zone” Archaeological Dig

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September 2009

z Pony Rides z Fishing z Archery Range ...and much more!

September 2009

Tweens & Teens 35 Calendar Events and activities

32 Character First What it means to be dependable

6

Dear MetroFamily Editor’s Note

8

Exploring Oklahoma Fall Tours in the Wichita Mountains

29

Spending time together is an important part of nurturing the relationship with your teen, especially the relationship between dads and daughters. Get the how-to’s and learn about the upcoming Father-Daughter Summit on page 28.

26 Family Finances Paying for your child’s higher education

10 Family Shorts News you can use

19 In Touch with Relationships Communication breakdown: too much phone time

22 Let’s Eat: Review A trip to POPS in Arcadia

24 Oklahoma Reads

20

Ideas for getting your kids into the volunteering spirit, engaging them in the community and helping them build a sense of responsibility and service.

Book reviews

26

Worried about college looming on the horizon? Read tips for finding financing and put your fears to rest.

42 The Father Life Understanding the lives of others

14 Your Healthy Family

On our cover: Edmond residents Matt McGuire and his 13-year-old daughter, Bridget, share a root beer at POPS in Arcadia as part of their father/daughter date. Other members of the McGuire family include mom, Kelley, and son, Curran, age 11.

Metabolic syndrome: what it is and why you should care

Photography by Aimee Adams Photography, Norman (AimeeAdamsPhoto.com)

September 2009

www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

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Dear MetroFamily, School is in full swing now—how are you coping?

I’ve looked forward to this year for so long, with both of my kids in full day school. Such wide vistas of free time available for me to finish all of those projects I’ve been putting off... but now I’m at a loss for where to start! It’s always something.

Me at age 17, looking much more confident than I felt.

This is our annual teen issue, and though the teen years for my kids are in the distant future, my own teen years feel like just yesterday. Maybe it’s all that 1980s nostalgia that’s feeding my feelings, but I can remember getting ready for school as a teen. My arsenal included the big can of Aqua Net hairspray and a Walkman cassette player as compared to today’s designer handbags and iPhones.

No matter how they are accessorized, the teen years can be difficult to navigate, and through this issue and the special articles available online at MetroFamilyMagazine.com/ September-2009, we are providing you with the tools you need.

How rad’ is that? LOL! ;) Cheers,

Info And Questions: 405-340-1404 To submit events to our calendar Calendar@MetroFamilyMagazine.com Publisher Sarah L. Taylor Sarah@MetroFamilyMagazine.com Editor Mari M. Farthing Editor@MetroFamilyMagazine.com Art Director Mitzi Massie Mitzi@MetroFamilyMagazine.com Advertising Sales Athena Delce Dara Price Donna Stewart Teresa Wilson Office and Distribution Manager Kathy Alberty Kathy@MetroFamilyMagazine.com Marketing Specialist Whitney Fleming Calendar Editor & Special Projects Assistant Terri Fields Calendar@MetroFamilyMagazine.com Editorial Assistants Elizabeth Harvey Sherrie Horton

• The Cover Kids Search continues and the deadline for entries is approaching. Just pick a snapshot of your child (or have Brock’s Photography take your child’s portrait) and enter today! We’re looking for six fresh new faces to grace our 2010 covers. Entry fee is $25 with part of the proceeds going to Special Olympics Special Smiles Program.

Upon entry, you will receive a prize package of coupons and discounts worth over $120. Our top finalists will receive more prizes and the six category winners will be photographed for the covers! Find the details and sign up at MetroFamilyMagazine. com/Cover-Kids. Deadline is October 15th! Our thanks to Presenting Sponsor, Delta Dental, and Photography Sponsor, Brock’s Photography, for their support of this project.

• Fall is a wonderful time to take a road trip. Whether you have a free day or weekend, you’ll find the information and coupons to have the best family time ever in our Exploring Oklahoma with Children travel guide. Our Kids Pass coupons are good through the fall season or December 31, 2009. Find more at ExploringOK.com. Our thanks to presenting sponsor, the Oklahoma Tourism and Recreation Department.

• Join us at some great events this month. We are co-sponsoring the Trendy Momma Tweetup to be held Sept. 24 at Trichology Salon. Find out more and register at MetroFamilyMagazine.com/trendy-momma-tweetup. And, on Saturday, September 26th from 9am-3pm, we’ll provide fun hands-on activities at the ZOOrific Day of Character at the OKC Zoo. See you there!

• Our October issue will include our big Birthday Party Guide and popular Fall Festival listing. Space reservation deadline is September 17; the issue distributes on October 2nd. Call today! 405-340-1404.

Graphics Assistant Kathryne Taylor Kathryne@MetroFamilyMagazine.com Contributing Writers Lisa Carpenter Ben Murphy Mari Farthing Annie Nashert Shannon Fields Gayleen Rabakkuk Leslie Garrett Sue Lynn Sasser Kim Goff Sherry Siler Karen Mitchell Circulation 35,000 – OKC, Edmond, Nichols Hills, Norman, Moore, Midwest City, Yukon Also available as a digital edition at MetroFamilyMagazine.com.

Articles and advertisements in MetroFamily do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the magazine or Inprint Publishing, Inc. We do not assume responsibility for statements made by advertisers or editorial contributors. The acceptance of advertising by MetroFamily does not constitute an endorsement of the products, services, or information. We do not knowingly present any product or service which is fraudulent or misleading in nature.

MetroFamily Magazine is published monthly

By Inprint Publishing, Inc. 306 S. Bryant, Suite C152 • Edmond, OK 73034 Fax: 405-340-1490 E-mail: Info@MetroFamilyMagazine.com ©Inprint Publishing, Inc. 2009, All Rights Reserved.

Volume 12, Number 09

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September 2009

The happier the heart the wider the smile.

A happy heart is a critical part of a solid foundation for success. That, in combination with an active mind and a healthy body is what we like to call the Primrose difference. With our proven, accredited curriculum and commitment to personal growth, it’s no wonder we’ve been inspiring children and parents alike for over 25 years. To learn more about our educational child care for infants through private kindergarten and after school, call 1.800.PRIMROSE or visit our website today.

primroseschools.com/MetroFamily

With The Right Foundation, Anything Is Possible®

Each Primrose School is privately owned and operated. Primrose Schools, The Leader in Educational Child Care, and With The Right Foundation, Anything is Possible are trademarks of Primrose School Franchising Company. ©2009 Primrose School Franchising Company. All rights reserved.

Exploring Oklahoma Wichita Mountains Wildlife Refuge

F

all is soon approaching. While some will be sorry to see summer go, I am personally welcoming the colorful and cool transition to fall. Fortunately, we have the Wichita Mountains Wildlife Refuge near Lawton, an attraction that provides unique and family-friendly tour options including bugling elk, fall foliage and star gazing.

Bugling Elk Have you ever heard the awkward bugling call of a bull elk? The first time I got this opportunity was in Rocky Mountain National Park in northern Colorado. The eerie, highpitched, whistling sounds made by the bulls during the fall mating season seem so uncharacteristic for the large, magnificent creatures. The sound is made by bulls either attracting females to their harems (or groups of cows) or for aggression to keep the younger bulls away. Getting the chance to view (and hear) a herd’s behavior in a natural setting is an educational treat. So, I was excited to recently learn that you don’t have to venture to Colorado to get a glimpse into this amazing natural phenomenon. You can find it right here in our beautiful state.

The Refuge is host to nearly 800 head of elk. While originally indigenous to the area, pioneer hunting exterminated the native herds by the late 1800s. An

elk reintroduction effort in the early 1900s successfully reestablished the elk population to its current levels.

The refuge now annually conducts bugling elk bus tours through a non-profit group of volunteers called Association of Friends of the Wichitas.

These popular tours run throughout September and October. Bugling activity occurs most frequently during the early morning and evening hours. Therefore, all tours begin promptly at 6:30am or 5pm, depending on the day. Tour slots are limited to groups of around 26 and fill fast.

Fall Foliage Another tour offered by the Friends of the Wichitas is the Fall Foliage Walk on October 31, November 7 and 14th at 10am. This is an interpretive onemile walk through the forests at Hollis Canyon. Participants will learn about the seasonal changing process while walking through the colorful forests of black jack, post oaks, chinquapin, red cedar and sugar maples. Dressing for the weather, including sturdy walking or hiking shoes, is recommended. All should bring drinking water.

still available in September (18th-19th).

Lack of city lights on and near the refuge provides a unique opportunity for astronomy enthusiasts. The Friends of the Wichitas provide volunteers who will lead groups of 15 through the history of astronomy and help visitors identify sky images with the naked eye and telescope. Participants should bring binoculars and lawn chairs. The two-hour program begins 30 minutes after sunset and participants are asked to meet at the Boulder/Lost Lake picnic area.

For additional information on these or other events offered by the Association of Friends of the Wichitas, see their website at FriendsOfTheWichitas. org. While camping is available on the refuge, additional nearby accommodations are available and may be found at LawtonFortSillChamber. com or by calling 800-872-4540.

Another source is MedicinePark.com.

Karen Mitchell, a lifelong resident of the Oklahoma City metro area, lives in Edmond with her husband, Mark, teenage son, Ryan, and one spoiled Welsh Corgi. Daughter, Megan, attends college at OSU in Stillwater.

Stars over the Wichitas While this tour is available throughout the spring and summer, two dates are

Important 2009 Tour Information

Serving award-winning breakfasts and lunches since 1980

Tour

Reservations Taken

Departure Point

Bugling Elk

Beginning August 24

Visitor’s Center

Fall Foliage

Beginning October 19

Visitor’s Center

Stars over the Wichitas

Beginning September 7

Boulder Gate

• Tours fill quickly, so make reservations early.

• All children must be at least eight years old.

• No groups; individuals and families only.

11 convenient Metro locations! www.JimmysEgg.com 8

www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

• All reservations are made by calling refuge headquarters at 580-429-3222 between 8am-4:30pm, Monday-Friday. A $5 reservation fee will be collected at check-in. Participants must arrive ten minutes before scheduled tour or risk losing their place.

• Annual Friends of the Wichita memberships are available for $15 (individuals) and $25 (families) and entitle members to pre-public tours of some events.

September 2009

November 6-7, 2009 Oklahoma’s first annual conference on Autism Spectrum Disorders For Families, Health Professionals, Educators, and Advocates PRESENTERS include James C. McPartland, Ph.D.,Yale Child Study Center and Liane Holliday Willey, Ed.D. with over 40 sessions by national and regional speakers to discuss a broad range of topics such as medical and health, education and social skills, and families and advocacy.

TO REGISTER visit OKAUTISM.ORG Oklahoma Statewide Autism Conference, November 6-7, 2009, Embassy Suites Norman – Hotel & Conference Center, Norman c/o Oklahoma Autism Network,Tolbert Center for Developmental Disabilities, University of Oklahoma Health Sciences Center 1600 North Phillips Avenue, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma 73104

www.okautism.org • Toll-free (877) 228.8476 Local (405) 271-7476 • Fax (405) 271-1707 Email: okautism@ouhsc.edu

IT’S T.I.M.E. FOR ACTION

TOGETHER • INFORMATION • MOMENTUM • EMPOWERED September 2009

www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

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Grandparents Raising Grandchildren

105degrees Cafe and Academy

Parenting children can be difficult under the best of circumstances. It can be even more difficult when you are the grandparent and not the parent, and the difficulties can take a toll on your marriage.

Raw food is coming to OKC. You read that right, but it’s not what you think—it’s raw food as in “living cuisine.” 105degrees Cafe will offer a menu of organic, plant-based foods served at the optimal temperature for health and flavor— 105˚ F.

What are the secrets to a long-lasting marriage? How do you keep your marriage alive while making your grandchildren a priority? Answers to these questions and more can be found at the Thriving Marriage Retreat for Grandparents Raising Grandchildren.

The Oklahoma Marriage Initiative is presenting an allexpense-paid retreat for two days and one night, offering grandparents time together to strengthen their relationship.

If needed, money is also available to help with childcare for grandchildren while grandparents attend the seminar.

The seminar will be held September 19-20 in Guthrie.

To register, please visit OKMarriage. net or call 1-877-4358033.

MFM Question of the Month Who “strikes” against the teachers at Super Hero School??

“For a growing number of people, living cuisine is a lifestyle,” said Dara Prentice, director of business and external affairs for 105degrees.

The raw food menu is helpful for those with food allergies or sensitivities, such as lactose intolerance. Even the wine list features organic offerings—most of which are also gluten-free.

The 105degrees Academy, adjacent to the restaurant, will teach students how to combine organic, raw ingredients with classic culinary techniques to create flavorful, creative and nutritious meals. “Each month is a new opportunity to learn about seasonal produce and the many unique ways of preparing it,” said Prentice.

The 105degrees Cafe will open at 5820 N Classen on September 12. A grand opening will be held October 3, featuring nationallyrecognized living cuisine experts presenting cooking demonstrations and discussions.

Beginning at 1pm, demonstrations and talks will feature raw food experts discussing how to get started in raw foods, health benefits of raw foods, and the challenges of maintaining a raw food diet in cattle country.

Call 405-842-1050 or visit 105degrees.com to learn more.

(Hint: see page 24) To enter, visit MetroFamilyMagazine.com/FS-Giveaway and complete the entry form. By doing so, you’ll be eligible to win a prize package valued over $450 Deadline is Thursday, September 24.

The winning entry will receive a prize package including the items pictured above. Full description of giveaway items listed at MetroFamilyMagazine.com/FSGiveaway. * Winner agrees to pick up items from NW OKC area.

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September 2009

Chile Rellenos. Photo by Miha Matei from Entertaining in the Raw

by Matthew Kenney. Reprinted with persmission of Gibbs Smith.

2009 Plaza District Festival The 2009 Plaza District Festival will be held October 3 in the city’s Plaza District—NW 16th between Indiana and Blackwelder.

This free community festival highlights the diverse artistic, musical, vocal and performance talents from Oklahoma City and around the state. Local food vendors will provide a tasty diversion from the activities. The grand stage will host a variety of performances; fine artist booths will feature jury-selected artists and their artwork, and the interactive “Art-in-Action” area allows children and adults to participate in hands-on arts education from professional artists. This year’s Art-in-Action activities will include a scavenger hunt/collage activity for children, salsa and flamenco dance instruction and line drawing workshops.

Other children’s activities at the festival include Metro Library storytimes and a performance by the Sugar Free Allstars. Children’s activities will be held from 3-7pm; the Festival will continue until 11pm. Visit PlazaDistrict.org for details on the festival.

Olympic Training Sites in Oklahoma Two sites in Oklahoma have been named as US Olympic and Paralympic training sites—The Oklahoma River south of downtown OKC and the University of Central Oklahoma (UCO) in Edmond.

The Oklahoma River was chosen as an official US Olympic and Paralympic training site for rowing and canoe/kayak. The river’s 2,000-meter race course and National High Performance Center are included in the site designation.

UCO was designated an official training site for volleyball, archery and Paralympic sports. UCO’s involvement in Paralympic sports began in 2000, when it hosted the first annual Endeavor Games for athletes with disabilities.

“As a community, we believe in the value of the Olympic Movement for our country,” said Olympic gold medal winning gymnast Bart Conner. “We hosted the United States Olympic Festival in 1989 and we have never hesitated to support United States Olympic and Paralympic athletes and the values they stand for— excellence, discipline, the spirit of fair play.”

Find more information online about the US Olympic Training sites (TeamUSA.org), the Oklahoma River (OklahomaRiver.us) and the University of Central Oklahoma (UCOWellnessCenter.com).

MetroTech’s Parent Resource Center National Night Out The 26th Annual National Night Out is scheduled for September 15. Citizens, law enforcement officials, civic groups and businesses join together to heighten awareness of crime prevention, generate support and awareness of local anti-crime programs, strengthen neighborhood spirit and police-community partnerships and send a message to criminals that neighborhoods are organized and fighting back.

Is your community involved? Visit the Neighborhood Alliance of Central Oklahoma at NACOK.org for details on how to get involved in the National Night Out program, suggested activities and ways to strengthen the community spirit in your community.

The Parent Resource Center at the Metro Technology Center is a full-service resource center working in partnership with the community to provide necessary services to parents, students and community members.

According to Carole Brown, Parents Resource Center Coordinator, “The goal of the program is to empower parents to become involved in their children’s education for the purpose of their children’s academic achievement.”

The next class series, including eight sessions on topics such as parent attitude, study skills and home environment, begins September 15. Other services are also provided. Call 405-605-3325 or visit MetroTech.org (Parent Resource Center information can be found under the Community Service link).

“Research indicates [that] students do better in school when their parents are involved,” said Brown. “We know parents make a positive difference in their children’s lives and we want to provide the tools necessary for that to happen.”

September 2009

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High Tech Diligence

By Lisa Carpenter

Parents are the first line of de defense against Internet danger at home. Our children need frank and ongoing discussions about abo online issues, including stranger-danger, keeping personal stranger-da information private and potential informati consequences of inappropriate conseque behavior. InternetSafety. com recommends the following safety tips for children engaging in common high-tech aactivities: Social networking. Remind kids to never post anything they wouldn’t want a parent or teacher to see.

Chatting. Anonymity and lack of consequences sometimes encourage rude or risque behavior. Check out chat sites your kids use, and if you are not comfortable with the sites, consider filtering software to block access.

Gaming. To prevent the unhealthy practice of spending more time in a virtual world than a real one, parents should either refuse to buy these games or impose time limits. (The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends no more than two hours of screen time per day per child 12 and under.)

Searching. Most search engines have safe-search settings, but they are easily disabled. Monitor your child’s usage, and consider filtering software to prevent access to websites with adult, violent or other inappropriate content.

File sharing. Peer-to-peer (P2P) file-sharing networks such as BitTorrent and Limewire allow unregulated access to member’s shared files, including pirated material and pornography, and may also open your computer to security risks. Avoid using them.

Sexting. Sexually-suggestive text messages, photos or videos sent by cell phone can invite public humiliation, cyberbullying or even sexual assault. Sexting can label teens as sex offenders for life. Phones today are simply small computers, and they should be regulated in the same way as those larger machines.

Iron Moms The MetroFamily Iron Moms met recently for the first run/walk to prepare for the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure, to be held October 10. From left: Cindi D., Nikki H., Christy K., Janey F., Kristina P., Tracie R., Jerri S., Melissa D., Sheri N. and Mari F. Read more and join the team at MetroFamily Magazine.com/ IronMoms.

Easy to be

Green Detox Your Child’s Room Take steps to ensure your child’s environment is free of toxins.

1. No vinyl, and that’s final. Many blinds are made of PVC, which frequently contains lead and hormonedisrupting phthalates. Choose window coverings made of natural materials like wood, cotton or linen.

2. Remove old carpet. Carpet fibers harbor dust mites, pesticides, bacteria, lead dust, and cleaning product chemicals, all of which kids disturb, churn, and inhale. Stick with bare floors and add a natural-fiber area rug, if desired. If that’s not feasible, clean the existing carpet with eco-friendly cleaners and vacuum often.

3. Paint it healthy. Volatile organic compounds in paints can worsen asthma and cause headaches, nausea, dizziness—even liver and kidney disease. Fortunately, zero-VOC paints are now easier to find than ever.

4. Non-toxic furnishings. Pressboard, laminated wood and particle wood all release formaldehyde. Opt for unfinished solid hardwood painted with zero-VOC paints or finishes. If you must choose particleboard or pressboard, seal it with a water-based sealant to prevent offgassing.

5. Add a plant. Common houseplants can significantly reduce such common toxins as benzene, formaldehyde and trichloroethylene. Consider Gerbera daisies, peace lily, bamboo palm and spider plant.

Leslie Garrett is author of The Virtuous Consumer: Your Essential Shopping Guide for a Better, Kinder, Healthier World. Visit her at VirtuousConsumer.com

Don’t forget—when you are done with this issue, pass it on to a friend or drop it in your recycle bin!

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September 2009

Problem-Solving Tweeting for a Good Cause Products When we hear about new or helpful products, we like to let our readers know! Here are a few of the interesting items we’ve recently found.

Problem: I want a personalized notebook!

Solution: Snapily notebooks ($9.99 small, $15.99 large) use your images to create an image-changing customized notebook.

(Snapily.com)

Problem: Why is that polish so smelly?

Solution: Piggy paint polish & remover ($9.99/up) is nontoxic and nonsmelly, water-based and long-lasting for small fingers and toes.

(PiggyPaint.com)

Problem: You want a cool pouch to stash your iPhone or MP3 player.

Solution: Pocket Jams Cassette Tape ($7.95) carries your new electronics, oldschool style.

(DCIGifts.com)

Problem:

OKC

Twestival (Twitter Festival) is a volunteer-run charity fundraising event for people who know each other through the micro-blogging service Twitter. The OKC Twestival will be held September 11, 7pm at Old Chicago Restaurant in Edmond (1150 E 2nd).

Twestival OKC will raise money for the Piedmont-based White Fields, which cares for abused and neglected boys in permanent custody of the Oklahoma Department of Human Services Child Welfare Division.

Volunteer teams in cities around the world are joining to gather sponsors and raise funds for worthy causes. “We’re so excited about Twestival OKC,” said OKC Twestival organizer Rex Barrett. “We’re working with a great team of volunteers and sponsors to raise funds for White Fields. We hope to see people in the Metro join us to have an amazing celebration and generate a lot of cash and awareness!”

Donations from local business partners allow 100% of the $15 ticket prices to go directly to White Fields. Funds will be used to provide equine therapy for their residents.

For a full list of participating cities from around the globe or to get involved, visit OklahomaCity.Twestival.com.

Entitle-Mania and Your Tween Admit it, parents—we’ve all commented on that child who we view as spoiled beyond all reason. Maybe it’s even our child that’s causing us to shake our heads!

Most parents know better and don’t set out to over indulge their children, but still it happens. A few main reasons: • More disposable income and smaller family sizes than previous generations.

• A need to make everything perfect, giving stuff instead of time due to parental guilt.

• A desire to give kids things parents didn’t have as children.

• Our world is a material world and we might usee “retail therapy” for a boost when we’re feeling down.

Solution:

• Kids don’t have chores because it’s easier for busy usy parents to get the job done themselves than to teach each kids how to do the job.

Is A Belt belt and tape ($16.95/up) will help keep your pants up and your straps in place, discreetly.

(IsABelt.com)

This “entitle-mania” has resulted in kids having more stuff, wanting more stuff and having fewer responsibilities than any previous generation, and it’s a problem that cuts across all socio-economic classes.

Problem:

Parents who struggle with troubling adolescent behavior have a new tool in the book Getting to Calm: Cool-headed Strategies for Parenting Tweens and Teens. Written by Clinical psychologist Laura Kastner, Ph.D. and writer Jennifer Wyatt, Ph.D., the book offers useful strategies for dealing with common problems that arise during the teen years.

Wardrobe Malfunction!

How much sun is too much?

Solution: UV Sol Beads ($4.95) change color in the sun to alert you to strong UV rays and remind you to use sunscreen.

Reusable—wear as a bracelet or tie it to your stroller or backpack (UVSolBeads.com)

Read an excerpt from the book on our website, MetroFamilyMagazine.com/September-2009.

September 2009

www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com w.MetroFamilyMagazine.c com co c om o m

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Your Healthy Family Understanding Metabolic Syndrome

O

klahoma is one of six states in the nation where approximately one in three of its citizens are obese. Of those that don’t qualify as “obese,� approximately half are overweight. Recently, the term “metabolic syndrome� has made its way into medical literature, but many people are still unclear about its meaning. In fact, some experts disagree about the criteria for diagnosis, and even whether metabolic syndrome exists as a distinct medical condition. So exactly what is metabolic syndrome, and who is at risk?

How does it relate to obesity, diet, and lifestyle?

Definition and Symptoms The phrase metabolic syndrome refers to a cluster of conditions that occur together, all of which increase the risk of heart disease, stroke, and diabetes.

Having one component of metabolic syndrome means the patient is at greater risk of developing the others. These conditions include: • Obesity • Elevated blood pressure • Elevated insulin levels • Waist circumference (men greater than 40�, women greater than 35�) • Abnormal cholesterol levels (reduced HDL, elevated triglycerides)

D Devonne Carter, LCSW, has bbeen counseling adults and cchildren h for over 18 years and knows the heartache and ppain that people feel in life.

Let Devonne help you work through your emotional problems.

2801 E. Memorial Road, Suite 120B &ENPOE t CartersCounseling.com 14

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The American Heart Institute recommends that metabolic syndrome be identified as the presence of three or more of the above conditions. The more components present, the greater the risk of developing heart disease and diabetes.

Causes Research into the underlying processes linking this group of conditions is ongoing, but as the name suggests, metabolic syndrome is closely tied to the body’s metabolism, and insulin resistance appears to be a major factor.

Insulin is a hormone produced in the pancreas that helps control the amount of sugar in the bloodstream.

Typically, the digestive system breaks down some of the food ingested into glucose. The blood then carries the glucose to the body’s tissues, where it can be used as fuel. Insulin helps glucose to enter the cells, but when a person is insulin-resistant, the cells don’t respond normally to insulin, and this process is interrupted. The body reacts by producing more insulin, resulting in higher than normal levels of both insulin and glucose in the blood.

While it may not be high enough to qualify as diabetes, an elevated blood glucose level still interferes with the body’s processes. Increased insulin raises triglyceride and blood fat levels and may interfere with kidney function, leading to elevated blood pressure.

These combined effects of insulin resistance are what put patients at higher risk for heart disease, stroke, and diabetes.

Risk Factors A number of factors increase the likelihood of having metabolic syndrome. Perhaps most significant is age, as the prevalence of metabolic syndrome increases dramatically with age, with about 40 percent of people showing signs by the time they are 60.

It is important to note, however, that obesity is perhaps the biggest risk factor.

Some research indicates that more than ten percent of American schoolchildren exhibit components of metabolic syndrome. Anyone considered obese September 2009

(defined as having a Body Mass Index of 30 or higher), is at risk.

Race is another risk factor, as Hispanics and Asians appear to be at the greatest risk for developing metabolic syndrome.

Having a family history of diabetes or a history of gestational diabetes also increases a person’s risk. Other diseases, such as high blood pressure, cardiovascular disease, and polycystic ovarian syndrome have also been identified as risk factors.

Diagnosis and Treatment Getting regular checkups is the first line of defense in preventing metabolic syndrome. While your healthcare practitioner may not be specifically looking for this condition, they are aware of the signs and symptoms and will likely counsel patients on the importance of lifestyle modifications.

Aggressive lifestyle changes are the first line of defense, and can improve all components of metabolic syndrome.

Exercise is one of the first recommendations made by many doctors. Adding 30 to 60 minutes of moderate intensity exercise every day can be of major benefit. Weight loss is also an important factor, and a loss of five to ten percent of body weight can reduce insulin levels and blood pressure, decreasing the risk of diabetes. A balanced diet emphasizing fruits, vegetables, fish, and whole grains has been found to offer important health benefits for people who have components of metabolic syndrome.

Finally, smoking cigarettes increases insulin resistance, and for this reason— and about a hundred others—patients should stop smoking immediately.

If you have concerns about the effects of metabolic syndrome, talk to a healthcare provider about ways in which you can reduce or eliminate these conditions and move on to a healthier lifestyle!

Shannon Fields is a freelance writer and a Certified Pharmacy Technician at Innovative Pharmacy Solutions.

at the Museum

September 12 s 10:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m.

Septemberfest at the Governor’s Mansion Sample chuck wagon cooking from the Museum’s wagon crew featuring the Big Pasture Ranch in El Reno, OK.

October 3-4 s 9:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m.

Bank of America Museums on Us® Weekend The National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum welcomes Bank of America customers taking advantage of Museums on Us® the first full weekend of every month. Any ATM, credit or check card from Bank of America provides free general admission for the cardholder. For more details visit, http://promotions.bankofamerica.com/ museums/.

1700 NE 63rd Oklahoma City, OK 73111 (405) 478-2250 www.nationalcowboymuseum.org

Thursday, September 10th 6:00 - 10:00 p.m. @ Harn Homestead Museum $5 in advance; $8 at the door (Free to Harn Homestead Museum Members)

All ages, family friendly Food and Beverages provided

by Iguana Mexican Grill (for additional charge)

Cupcake Walk by Sara Sara Cupcakes Live music by Camille Harp and The Mighty Regulars

OKLAHOMA

Czech Czech Festival S! N E P P A FUN H

Saturday, October 3 Parade starts at 10 AM. Downtown Yukon on Route 66.

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Enjoy a full day of activities in Yukon!

After the parade, listen to authentic polka bands, eat some Kolaches and see the crowning of this year's Czech royalty.

There's also a carnival for the kids and a craft fair for all ages!

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Your Library.

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Be a part of the Nation’s leading children’s and maternity consignment sales event!™

Norman Event • October 12 - 17 Open 9am - 6pm at the Cleveland County Fairgrounds • Shop and get unbelievable deals on everything your kid’s need!

• Sell your items as a consignor and earn 65% •Volunteer to shop extra early and earn 70% on items you consign!

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September 2009

In Touch With Relationships Communication Technology and Your Family

I

n the waiting room of my office there is a sign placed in a strategic location which says: “Please respect the privacy of others by turning off your cell phones.� I am not sure if the sign is effective. I have on several occasions entered the waiting room area, and asked an individual to please step outside if they need to talk on their phone. I am met with some interesting looks and responses. What is our culture teaching our children about communication, respect for personal space and the opportunity to sit quietly without talking or texting?

How many times have you been in a restaurant or place of business and overheard conversations all around you? A few days ago, I was sitting in a booth at a restaurant, a mother and daughter were in the next booth. During my 30 minute lunch, I had the pleasure of hearing every word of 12 different telephone conversations. Equally annoying was the level of their voices, with no attempt to be discreet. I gave some “can’t you silence your ringer looks,� with no response.

We are a culture of multitasking, and in some work environments that is a skill that is highly valued. Multitasking in the area of communication is not as desirable. I observe parents and children alike having conversations with each other while talking on the phone, texting, or playing a computer game. There is very little eye contact if any. Good communications skills are fundamental to good relationships.

Parents, are you modeling that for your children? Is there a time in the evening when technology can be turned off, and meaningful conversations and exchange of information can take place? Parents of teens and preteens—do your children use their cell phones responsibly? Are you teaching phone etiquette and the responsibility that comes with having a cell phone?

Hara Estroff Marano, author of Nation of Wimps, describes the cell phone as the “eternal umbilicus� that keeps children perpetually connected to their parents. She warns that it prevents children from thinking independently and problem solving. Instead of

internalizing the values that mom and dad have taught in the home when trying to problem solve, the child only has to internalize the thought: “call home.�

What about the child who already has difficulty listening to a parent or teacher when they are speaking? Add to that lack of focus a steady stream of texts and phone calls and you have a child who is lost and overwhelmed with just being able to listen attentively.

Thankfully, schools are becoming stricter with guidelines about cellphone use during school hours.

Too frequently, we hear in the news about adults and teens guilty of trying to text and drive at the same time.

Inattentive drivers are causing traffic accidents as they multitask with various technologies. In some states, drivers using their cell phone while driving are subject to a fine.

For parents with teenagers and preteens, it is increasingly frightening to hear about things that are happening within the subculture of texting. Sexting is the newest buzzword, which encompasses anything from explicit talk about sex, to nude or variations of nude and sexually provocative pictures. We have heard in the media recent stories of suicide because of pictures circulated within a group, and the subsequent hurt and damage that accompanies those pictures falling into the wrong hands.

the opportunity to just daydream, or settle in with a good book? Is the television always on? Are there rules and guidelines about when the phone is silenced at night? • Teach your child that having a cell phone comes with responsibility. • Teach your child proper phone etiquette and observation of other’s space. • Model good communication skills. • Talk with your preteens and teens about the potential dangers of exchanging inappropriate pictures and language. • If you have a teenage driver, outline rules for cell phone use while driving. • Find time within the day to turn off your technology and talk as a family.

Don’t get me wrong. I love my cell phone, and I often wonder how I managed before I had it, but I did. The motto “All things in moderation� comes to mind. Teach your children well!

Sherry Siler is a licensed professional counselor within the Counseling and Consulting Offices of Paul Tobin, Ph.D., and Ann Benjamin, LPC. Sherry’s work encompasses lifespan adult issues including parenting, marriage, and aging.

Parents often feel that they are not entitled to ask for their teen’s phones, to see what is coming in, and what is going out. They are frequently blindsided when a bill comes in, with 600 or more text messages, and charges in excess of their call plan.

Cell phones provide a sense of security for all of us when we travel, knowing that help is just a phone call away. They are a deterrent to crime, with instant availability to call 911 when danger is present. They are a convenience that, for the most part, helps us in our busy lives.

Frequently, I ask my clients what they do to find peace and quiet in their day.

Often, the answer is “What do you mean?� We have forgotten the value of being quiet. Do your children get September 2009

Your Walk-in Arts & Crafts Place

WITHÆINDOORÆ PLAYGROUND open til 8:00 pm leather crafts paint-n-take parents night out ceramics birthday parties wi-fi

1-6( t VOQMVHHJUT DPN 575 Enterprise Drive, Edmond (South of 15th, off Kelly) www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

19

Kids and Volunteering: how and why they should! Š Lumaxart2d | Dreamstime.com

Getting your kids to volunteer in their community will not only keep them busy and active, but can also result in an educational and rewarding experience. Through volunteering, kids learn important life skills such as responsibility, caring, independence and organization. Kids are also able to see how good they may have it, which can result in an appreciation for what they have, and how important it is to help and serve others.

To get kids interested in volunteering, it is important to find out what they enjoy doing. Getting kids to utilize their skills and talents can contribute to a positive volunteering experience for everyone involved. There are many volunteer opportunities where kids can utilize their skills to benefit others such as singing, acting, caring for pets, visiting seniors and participating as Wii challengers, and teaching computer skills.

Motivating Factors Kids become very interested in volunteering opportunities when they realize that volunteering is more than just cleaning up parks or participating in food drives. Most kids think that these are the only type of volunteer opportunities available for their age group. When kids are made aware of other types of opportunities, the excitement and interest in volunteering increases. According to the Institute for Volunteering 20

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September 2009

Research, “Young people who do volunteer have a wider appreciation of its scope and potential, and are less likely to label volunteers according to traditional stereotypes.�* Appealing to older kids can be a challenge, but showing them that volunteer experience can be used as prior job experience always seems to get their attention. Most high school students have made some sort of decision as to what they want to be when they graduate. To them, any type of volunteer experience that is directly related to any future career endeavors can be used to further their success. Think about this: It is most common for young college graduates to have the required education for a job, but lack job experience for their resumes.

This is where volunteer experience can be of value to them.

When high schoolers realize that volunteering can benefit them career-wise, their interest in volunteering increases.

Opportunities

animal shelters by collecting pet food and supplies.

Suitable and age-appropriate volunteer opportunities exist for all ages and personal interests.

Getting children involved in volunteering is an exceptional way to make them aware of the world around them. Here are some ideas to help get your children interested and involved: Friendly Visitors. Many senior centers and retirement homes are in constant need of friendly visitors for their clients. Seniors can often be lonely due to a lack of family or friends nearby. Kids are often welcomed to senior centers to bring enthusiasm and excitement to their clients. Kids can brighten up someone’s day just by talking with them, taking a walk or reading to them. Some seniors can no longer read and need someone to read important documentation or letters to them, or just want to hear poems or stories from their favorite books.

Outdoor Clean-Up. Contact your local Parks and Recreation department to see if they need help on local trail or park cleanup. Kids can help create trails, plant flowers and maintain park facilities. Kids can feel rewarded by the fact that they helped provide a safe and clean environment where other kids can play and have fun, and there’s the added benefit of being active outdoors as a volunteer.

© Lisafx | Dreamstime.com

Outdoor Events. Kids can volunteer at local sporting events, such as walk-a-thons or outdoor events sponsored by the local YMCA. Kids can help participants sign in, direct them to where they need go to, sell concessions, or distribute products.

Entertainment. Kids who sing, dance or act can perform at local senior centers for retirement homes. These organizations welcome performers of all ages to entertain their clients. If this is a career your child wants to pursue, this is a great opportunity to acquire experience and exposure.

Creating Care Packages.

Creating care packets for homeless shelters is easy for kids to do either by themselves or with friends. Items like toiletries (shampoo, soap, toothbrushes and Volunteer Centers. Check to see toothpaste) or snacks (granola if your community has a volunteer bars, crackers or juice boxes) center. Most YMCA’s and local can be included, but contact the recreational organizations have homeless shelter you want to volunteer opportunities. Churches donate to and ask the director and local fire stations are also a what is needed. It is important good place to check, as well as to only donate items that the your local United Way office, homeless shelters need and can which specializes in youth use. In addition to this activity, a volunteering activities. donation drive can be done either Yes, kids may prefer to spend their inside or outside. Another option free time hanging out with friends is to raise funds for donation or surfing the Internet. However, items with a car wash or bake getting your kids, and if possible © Snyderdf | Dreamstime.com sale. Adding a contest to see who the entire family to help others can raise the most money, wash by volunteering, can be fun and the most cars or bring in the most educational.

Find a listing of local vounteering options donation items can challenge and make the opportunity fun and for your teen online at exciting for the kids! This type of MetroFamilyMagazine.com/Volunteering activity is also a good option for Kim Goff is a professional speaker special-needs children to participate and author, who currently works as a communications director for the United Way of York. As a freelance in. Kids can sit and fill bags as they talk and get to know each writer, Kim wrote the book Female Empowerment – A Personal other.

Caring for Pets. Local humane societies and animal shelters are in need of volunteers due to the influx of pets being put up for adoption. Kids can help by feeding, walking and playing with the pets. The whole family can participate in this activity, which can result in families being able to spend more quality time together. Kids can also participate in donation drives for

Journey to share her insights on overcoming obstacles and the challenges of raising an autistic child. She also works on the York Daily Record’s volunteer blog and is the Philadelphia Special Needs Kids Examiner for Examiner.com. kimgoff@excite.com.

Source: *Institute for Volunteering Research, VR, Generation V: Young people speak out on volunteering, ivr.org.uk, 2009.

September 2009

www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

21

Let’s Eat: Review Fizzy Fun on the Mother Road at POPS in Arcadia

B

ubbles and fizz and colorful bottles abound in the over 500 varieties of drinks offered at POPS. Flavors come in all hues of the rainbow, offering a beautiful (and tasty) array of choices.

People have asked me about POPS so I thought it was time to check them out, especially since the Good Egg Dining Group (of Cheever’s Cafe and Iron Starr Barbecue) took over the restaurant. I was also curious just how far off I-35 I would have to travel.

POPS in Arcadia is a nationally recognized landmark that celebrates the history of Route 66 with a thoroughly modern flair.

I now have answers to many questions.

Take your family five miles east of I-35 on Route 66 to the large pop bottle sculpture. You never know what sort of crowd you will encounter. On the day my daughter Mandy and I were there, there was a large group of motorcycle riders, a group from the Corps of Engineers, and parents with kids of all ages. Should you have to wait for a table

as we did, be sure to peruse the variety of mouth-watering pop, or take your picture by the pop bottle sculpture.

POPS offers breakfast on Saturday and Sunday mornings only. Sadly, we were there on a weekday so we had to order from the lunch/dinner menu—no omelets or biscuits and gravy for us.

Fortunately, there were many tastysounding items to choose from on the menu and our disappointment was soon forgotten.

On the lunch/dinner menu you can choose from specialty sandwiches like grilled PB&J ($3); the pop dog ($4.50) a Âź pound hot dog topped with mustard chow-chow, cheddar cheese, and tomatoes on a poppy seed bun; chili cheeseburger ($4.75) with cheddar cheese and chili on a toasted bun; or chicken fried steak ($8), a hand breaded top sirloin steak smothered in black pepper gravy served with fries and Texas toast. I like the sound of the steak “smotheredâ€? in black pepper gravy.

Everything on the menu sounds mouth watering and filling.

POPS has a kids menu for your little ones to enjoy. A simple PB&J ($4.75) or grilled cheese ($4.25), chicken strips ($5.50) or cheeseburger ($5.50), all come with crinkle cut French fries, a tasty departure from those smooth-sided fast food fries your children might be more

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September 2009

accustomed to seeing.

After watching several yummy looking plates go by, Mandy decided on the chicken melt sandwich ($5.50), which consisted of roasted chicken with grilled onions, lettuce, tomato, pickles, melted provolone cheese and spicy mayo on a Kaiser bun. To accompany this, she ordered a side of crispy onion rings ($2.75). Her two-handed sandwich required a lot of napkins but the flavors made the mess worthwhile. The spicy mayo had a chipotle flavor and Mandy declared it very tasty.

I chose the prime burger ($8), which offers anything you could possibly want. You can build your burger with bacon, bleu cheese, grilled onions, jalapenos, sautÊed mushrooms, green chilis, provolone cheese, jack cheese and American cheese. I chose bacon, grilled onions, jalapenos, lettuce, tomato, and American cheese with mayo. I had this with a side of the crinkle cut French fries ($1.75). This burger was about ½ pound; a thick and juicy patty. It is also a two-handed meal that requires extra napkins. The fries were hot and tender, crispy and soft, just the way I like them.

With no hope of finishing these meals, we had to get to-go boxes. I also selected an order of cobbler to take home and enjoy. On the day we visited, the seasonal cobbler ($4) was

Parks and Recreation either apple or blackberry, and I chose blackberry. I should have gotten a giant cookie ($3) too, but we were too full to think that clearly. At home, I heated the cobbler and it was tender and juicy, generous enough for my husband and I to share.

COME OUT & PLAY

If you need something cold and creamy, POPS offers sundaes, shakes and malts to soothe your craving. Add those to the varieties of pop and your choices seem endless.

If inside dining is full and you don’t have time to wait there is outdoor, covered seating where you can turn your visit into a picnic. No matter how you decide to do it, POPS is a worthwhile stop.

Annie Nashert has a husband and teenage daughter who assume everybody has homemade dessert nightly.

Annie’s Restaurant Rating

4 of 4 forks

POPS

660 W Hwy 66, Arcadia

Hours Store: 6am-10pm Restaurant: 10:30am-9pm daily Breakfast Saturday-Sunday 6am-10:30am only Prices $3-$8 Kids Menu: $2.50-$5.50

Recreating Experience and Adventure Hike, ďŹ sh, swim or hit the scenic and rugged MILE MOUNTAIN BIKE TRAIL AT !RCADIA ,AKE #HALLENGE YOURSELF WITH A ROUND OF GOLF AT +ICKINGBIRD S CHAMPIONSHIP COURSE OR SHOP FOR FRESH FRUITS AND VEGETABLES AT THE &ESTIVAL -ARKET 0LACE 7HATEVER YOUR INTEREST THE #ITY OF %DMOND PROVIDES YOU WITH A VAST NUMBER OF OPPORTUNITIES TO EXPERIENCE adventure and create connections. %$-/.$/+ #/- 0!2+3 s

September 2009

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23

Enter MetroFamily’s

Oklahoma Reads Great Reads for Great Kids Picture book for Preschool and Up Bringing Down the Moon

by Jonathon Emmett, illustrated by Vanessa Cabban (Candlewick Press, board book, $6.99) Who hasn’t been excited upon seeing the full moon?

Mole certainly is, and he is on a mission to pull the moon down from the sky.

Most unintentionally, Mole enlists the help of all of his forest friends on his quest. Children will love to accompany the forest animals on their journey.

Fiction for grades Kindergarten-3 SuperHero School

by Aaron Reynolds, illustrated by Andy Rash (Bloomsbury Children, hardcover, $16.99)

Presenting Sponsor:

Photography Sponsor:

Leonard is so excited to go to Superhero school ... until he realizes that instead of learning how to bend steel, he will be learning math. But when the “Ice Zombies” strike and the students are put to the test, Leonard realizes just how important math can be.

Fiction for grades 3 and up t Six categories t Sixty finalists (who will receive great prizes) t First 300 entrants receive a “thank you” mailing of great coupons and admission tickets to local attractions Details on next page and at MetroFamilyMagazine.com/ Cover-Kids

The Butterfly Ball and the Grasshopper’s Feast

by William Plomer, illustrated by Alan Aldridge (Templar Books, Hardcover, $22.99) A gorgeous rendition of the 1973 classic, complete with brightlycolored illustrations accompanying each section of verse telling the story of one fine day in the forest, when the creatures gathered to hold a ball.

Nonfiction for grades 4-8 113 things to do by 13

by Brittany MacLeod (Harlequin, softcover, $14.95) Parents, I have some bad news for you—your tween girl might not always listen to what you have to say. But they listen to what other girls say, and this book includes advice from a Hollywood teen (the daughter of an entertainment journalist). Some of the tips are inane (jump up and down on one foot while drinking soda), or questionable (have a food fight), but most of it is insightful and important (read books, take care of yourself, be confident, eat well, be active in your community).

Nonfiction for Parents Mental Toughness: Understanding the Game of Life

by Dr. Timothy S. Wakefield (Author House, softcover, $16) This book began as a letter from a father to his son, an attempt to teach the things that are most important in life, the positive lessons learned though life. Dr. Wakefield’s lessons outline how to live a positive, happy, successful and productive life. This book provides a useful guide for teaching these lessons.

Find more parenting book reviews at

MetroFamilyMagazine.com/ September-2009 Reviews by MetroFamily Magazine editor Mari Farthing.

24

www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

September 2009

Here’s Your Chance!444 The search is on to find fresh faces and smiles to light up MetroFamily’s covers in 2010!

Categories include: Ages 0-18 months 19 mos-3 years 4-7 years 8-11 years 12-18 years Special Needs (All Ages 0-18)

Photos submitted should only show the child being nominated (group photos are not allowed); should have been taken within the last two months; and should be candid shapshots, not professionally-taken photos unless taken by Brock’s Photography, BrocksPhotography.com (see below for details*).

Deadline is October 15, 2009.

Ten semi-finalists will be selected for each category. The six category winners will be selected by MetroFamily readers through an online voting process. Each winner will be professionally photographed and featured on one of our covers in 2010!

Enter soon! First 300 entrants will receive a “thank you” mailing of coupons and discounts to local businesses, including a ticket to a RedHawks game, admission to local attractions, and more! * The only way to provide a professionally-taken photo in the contest is through the photography sponsor, Brock’s Photography (405-863-7705). As an added bonus, have your child’s photo taken by Brock’s and you’ll receive up to $100 in print credit. (Offer not to be combined with other offers.)

Two ways to enter: 1.

2.

PREFERRED: Go online to MetroFamilyMagazine.com/cover-kids, complete the form, upload your child’s digital photo and pay using a credit/debit card. Photo must be print quality.

Send the completed form and a 4X6 or 5X7 snapshot with $25 check or credit card info submitted on form below. (Find details and address on form below.)

A portion of the proceeds from this contest will be donated to the Special Olympics Special Smiles Program

Questions? Please email Info@MetroFamilyMagazine.com or call 405.340.1404.

ONLY ONE CHILD PER ENTRY Either send this form by mail or go online to MetroFamilyMagazine.com/cover-kids Name of Child _______________________________________________ Date of birth (mm/dd/yy) ____________________________ Age ________ Category (Circle One) 0-18mos 12-18yrs.

19mos-3yrs 4-7yrs Special Needs (all ages)

8-11yrs

Address ___________________________________________________ City __________________________ State _______Zip _____________ Home Phone __________________ Mobile Phone ____________________ Parent/Guardian Name _________________________________________ Signature: _________________________________________________ My signatures indicates that I give permission for my child’s photo to be used by MetroFamily without restriction. The entry fee is non-refundable and all photos will become property of MetroFamily. Photos will not be returned. It is further understood that my child’s photo may be placed on MetroFamilyMagazine.com but will be identified only by a first name, age and city.

$25 per entry. Make check payable to MetroFamily or pay here by credit card.

Check

VISA

MasterCard

Discover

American Express

Account Number: _____________________________________________ Expiration Date: ______________________________________________ Billing Address: ______________________________________________ City __________________________ State _______Zip _____________ E-mail: ___________________________________________________ Signature: _________________________________________________ Mail completed form, photo and $25 fee for each entry to: Cover Kids Search, MetroFamily, 306 S Bryant, Suite C152, Edmond, OK 73034

September 2009

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25

Family Finances How To Finance Your Child’s Education

W

hile most colleges and universities in Oklahoma have frozen tuition this year, the cost of a college education has been rising faster than the rate of inflation for the past several years. As a result, many families are relying on some type of financial aid to help pay their children’s post-secondary education.

Each family has different needs based on their overall financial situation as well as the educational goals of their aspiring college student. In Oklahoma, the cost of attending college tends to run less than the national average. A year at an Oklahoma research university runs about $15,000 per year, including books, fees, room and board, and other related costs for a full-time student, compared to less than $10,000 at the regional universities and about $7,700 at a community college. (More information on college costs in Oklahoma is available at OKcollegestart.org.)

Seeking a Great r?

Babysitte

Today, about two out of three fulltime college students receive some kind of financial aid, such as grants, scholarships, work-study and education loans. Most grants, scholarships and fellowships do not need to be repaid.

However, other types of aid—student loans and some grants—do require repayment. The different types of financial aid have their own set of criteria and eligibility, so it is important to be aware of the options available.

Following is a brief overview of the common types of financial aid currently available: • Grants, Scholarships and Fellowships. Generally based on some form of achievement such as grades, community involvement, athletics, fine arts, etc. • Work-Study. On-campus employment opportunities for college students.

Supplemented with federal funds. Pay

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is minimum wage or above, and the number of hours worked is based on student need. • Stafford Loans. Low interest federal loans for educational expenses. May be subsidized (based on need) and unsubsidized (not based on need).

Payments deferred until after college graduation. Relatively easy to get and the most common type of loan available. • Perkins Loans. Based on need and more limited than Stafford Loans. • Pell Grants. Based on need. • Parent PLUS Loans. Loans for parents of dependent children. Based on college costs and other financial aid received. • Private or Alternative Loans. Tend to be more expensive than federal loans programs. Recommended to supplement other financial aid options or as a last resort. Terms, repayment

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September 2009

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options and eligibility vary greatly from lender to lender.

Oklahoma students have one additional option, called Oklahoma’s Promise.

Available only to eighth-, ninth- and 10th-grade students (home schooled students must be age 13, 14 or 15), Oklahoma’s Promise covers the cost of tuition for students whose family income is $50,000 or less at the time they apply for the program and less than $100,000 at the time the student enters college.

(More information on Oklahoma’s Promise is available at OKHighered.org/ okpromise).

To qualify for almost all financial aid programs, applicants must be a U.S. citizen or an eligible non-citizen, be enrolled or planning to enroll in a post-secondary institution (a college or university) at least half-time and attend a school that participates in the Title IV federal student aid program. The most

Children, despite delays or disabilities, can improve their skills allowing them to reach their highest potential.

widely used process for determining eligibility is the Free Application for Federal Student Aid, commonly called FAFSA. FAFSA was developed by Federal Student Aid, an office of the U.S. Department of Education.

It is used to provide a fair and impartial process for determining who is eligible for various student aid programs and the amount of funds needed for those seeking financial support, which today exceeds $80 billion annually.

Most experts highly recommend that parents of all children preparing for college complete the FAFSA because it is a comprehensive application frequently used to determine eligibility for the vast majority of financial aid, including many scholarships, grants and fellowships at local colleges and universities.

Most high school counselors or financial aid officers at colleges and universities are available to assist parents in completing applications and securing financial aid. It should never be necessary to pay for these services.

Families who start saving when their children are young can reduce the financial burden of paying for a college education. However, even families with limited income and savings have several options to ensure their children have the additional benefits that come with a college degree or other types of postsecondary education. Knowing what is available to pay for that education can protect a family’s financial resources for years to come.

Sue Lynn Sasser, PhD, is an associate professor of economics at the University of Central Oklahoma.

FREE ADMISSION

SEPTEMBER 26 & 27 More than 100 hands-on outdoor activities for the whole family to enjoy!

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Located at Open 8 AM to 6 PM each day More info @ wildlifedepartment.com

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27

Fun Hands-On Activities At the Oklahoma City Zoo Saturday, September 26, 9am-3pm w w w. c h a r a c t e ro k.o rg Animal Stories Scavenger Hunt Do you know how the beaver illustrates diligence, or the bobcat discernment? Participate in this characterthemed scavenger hunt and find out! At each stop, storytellers will share how these and other animals illustrate character qualities that you can also exemplify.

You’ll receive a prize upon completion of your hunt for good character.

t 'BDF 1BJOUJOH t 4BDL 1VQQFUT t 4QJO UIF XIFFM PG DIBSBDUFS t 1MVT NBOZ NPSF GVO BDUJWJUJFT T FREE SOUVENIR T-SHIRT 'PS ,JET )VSSZ‰POMZ BWBJMBCMF MF F while supplies last!

DISCOUNTED ADMISSION 4UPQ CZ UIF $IBSBDUFS $PVODJM PG $FOUSBM 0LMBIPNB CPPUI BOE SFDFJWF a coupon for discounted admissionwhile quantities last. t Pò ;PP BENJTTJPO GPS DIJMESFO BHFT t Pò BENJTTJPO GPS BHFT BOE BCPWF Hands-on activities are near the Zoo’s entrance and are free; regular zoo admission must be purchased to complete the scavenger hunt. Call 405-996-8197 for more information.

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September 2009

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Fathers: Listen To Your Daughters!

Fathers, listen up! Listening is one of the most important attributes that daughters want from their dads, according to research by the National Center for Fathering (NCF), a nonprofit, scientific and education organization founded to provide fathers with research-based training to become more involved with their children. Daughters want to communicate openly with their fathers about boys, moral issues and other outside struggles without fear of being lectured or disciplined. And research indicates that doing so effectively will help them socially, emotionally, mentally and physically. So why is communicating with growing daughters such a struggle for so many dads?

September 2009

www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

29

Carey Casey, the self-described Chief “Encouragement�

Officer of NCF, explains that fathers can feel a level of disconnect from their daughters for a variety of reasons.

A literal absence—caused by divorce, military service, incarceration or other circumstances—can create distance.

Many times, however, the distance is mental and emotional, when a dad just doesn’t know how to connect with his comingof-age daughter. No matter the situation, daughters need the healing presence of a sound father figure in their lives. “The lack of constructive interaction with a loving, attentive father results in apprehension and inadequate skills in a daughter when she relates to males,� states psychologist Marshall Hamilton, PhD, as quoted by NCF.

The Statistics While an involved mother is influential in a girl’s teen sexual activity, fathers have twice the influence. NCF research indicates that daughters who have involved fathers are less likely to participate in teen sexual activity and/or become pregnant. The more aware, involved and affirming the father, the bigger the impact on the teen’s sexual behavior, according to the organization.

Also, children who live in homes without their fathers are more likely to be poor, become involved in drug and alcohol abuse, drop out of school, and suffer from health and emotional problems, according to NCF. Casey acknowledges in his book, Championship Fathering, that there are no such things as perfect dads. However, there are several important steps for facilitating open

zz

Da e in a Ma e 4 walk-through Mazes • Petting Zoo • Pumpkin Patch • Picnic and Play Areas • And much more!

Oering: Field Trips, Birthday Parties, 4DPVUJOH &WFOUT $IVSDI (SPVQT 'BNJMZ Reunions or just a good time with your family Open: Labor Day weekend - Thanksgiving weekend (weather permitting) Saturday BN QN OJHIU UJNF GVO t Sunday 2pm - dusk Monday-Friday, groups by appointment only

Admission: t VOEFS GSFF t (SPVQ SBUFT BWBJMBCMF Location: 2 miles North of Hwy 51 on Hwy 74

Call 580-234-MAZE (6293) On weekends call 405-550-5964 or 405-550-9177

For more info: www.dazeinamaze.com 30

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September 2009

communication in your family: loving your children, loving and showing respect for the children’s mother and coaching by a loving father.

Loving Your Children Most fathers love their children very much, but “run out of gas� when it comes to expressing that love, says Casey. Girls, on the other hand, become good communicators at a young age.

If we open our hearts to our children, says Casey, they’ll often open theirs to us—especially if they’re daughters. We can find creative ways to express love to our children. It’s never too late to let your children know you care. A child (young or adult) never tires of hearing the words, “I love you and I’m proud of you.�

Loving the Children’s Mother Casey says it’s up to fathers to communicate to children what marriage and romantic love are all about and the best way is by example—“showing love to our brides and serving them.� According to Casey, kids should get a clear picture of marriage from God’s perspective. Even in cases of divorce or single parent situations, fathers should regard and speak of the children’s mother with respect. “Honor your children’s mom in their presence. Compliment her often and make sure your children show her respect.� “We need young men and women to know who they are,� says Casey. “Young girls need to have that vision; that they are not going to have sex with any man that says ‘I love you.’�

Does your child have ADHD and/or a learning disability in reading (dyslexia)?

Your child Y hild may b be eligible li to take part in a research study. • ADHD is a condition in which a child is easily distracted. • It is hard for the child to pay attention or wait for his or her turn. • It is tough for the child to sit without fidgeting and squirming, or jumping up to do something else. • Children with ADHD act first and think later. • Children with reading disabilities (dyslexia) have persistent problems with reading.

If this sounds like your child, take this opportunity to learn more about your child’s behavior and this study. A pharmaceutical company is studying an investigational medication that may help girls and boys who experience these symptoms.

If your boy or girl is between the ages of 10 and 16 and has ADHD and/or a reading disability contact: Child Study Center At 405-271-5700 EXT. #45167 Email lora-tusing@ouhsc.edu or brenda-schlinke@ouhsc.edu THE UNIVERSITY OF OKLAHOMA IS AN EQUAL OPPORTUNITY INSTITUTION

Coaching As Casey points out, mothers and fathers relate to children differently. Biological mothers, who were literally attached to their newborns at birth, fill a large role as direct caregiver (as do mothers of adopted children). Fathers take on a different role as coach or role model. Daughters, specifically, can be “coached” for dating. Taking a daughter on father-daughter dates is an effective way to model respectful dating behavior and discuss what she should expect from boys who go out with her. However, coaching doesn’t mean preaching (remember daughters’ fear of being lectured as mentioned above). Instead, be involved, share insights and help your children work through the challenges of life.

Father-Daughter Summit In an effort to reach all families in the community, the Father-Daughter Summit, presented by NCF, will be held in Oklahoma City in October. The Summit seeks to reach fathers, to help them learn the skills necessary to forge a strong relationship with their daughters.

The goal of the summit, according to the NCF website, is “to engage fathers and daughters in heart-to-heart relationships characterized by openness, acceptance and affirmation.”

Karen Mitchell, a lifelong resident of the Oklahoma City metro area, lives in Edmond with her husband, Mark, teenage son, Ryan, and one spoiled Welsh Corgi. Daughter, Megan, attends college in Stillwater.

Father-Daughter Summit When: October 3, 2009 Time: 9:30am-5pm (lunch provided) Where: The Cathedral (7700 N Council Road, OKC) Who: Fathers (or father figures) and their daughter (age 11 and up) Cost: $25/pair Registration: Fathers.com or 913-384-4661 35% of daughters surveyed prior to the summit were very satisfied to extremely satisfied with their relationship with their father.

83% of these same daughters expressed that they were very satisfied to extremely satisfied with their relationship with their father six weeks after the event.

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September 2009

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31

Character First Dependability

T

hat important project at work needed just a little more tweaking, so you called home and talked with your oldest about feeding the dog, getting dinner started and doing homework. When you open the front door, you are greeted by a very hungrylooking dog, no delicious smells are wafting from the kitchen and the book bags are both parked beside the door.

As you contemplate an alternative for dinner, Michael whizzes in to fill his juice glass. “Mom, I beat Randy at Wii boxing!”

“That’s great.” You worry whether that has impacted the homework progress, but congratulate him before popping the question. “How’s the homework, Buddy?”

You end up overseeing homework while you wait for the pizza delivery. Then over dinner you discuss dependability— fulfilling what is promised, even if it requires unexpected sacrifice.

“Randy?” Very shortly your young teenager emerges from the game room, Wii remote in hand. “Randy, did you feed Pokey and put the lasagna in the oven?”

The smile disappears from your son’s face. “Uh, I forgot. But I’ll feed him now.” He leads the dog away before you can ask about dinner. What you suspected is confirmed when you enter the kitchen. The oven is cold and empty—the lasagna sits in the freezer, a full hour and a half away from the table.

Whether it is doing your job at home, at school or on the soccer field, if others know they can count on you to get the job done, you quickly move into the category of “most valuable player.”

Being reliable often leads to positive recognition, whether in the form of promotion, pay raise or extra privileges.

our children for the increased responsibilities they will face as they grow into adults. We do this by teaching them to be dependable with small commitments at first. As children master small obligations, they become increasingly prepared to manage greater things.

One of the most important things we can do in this area is set a good example for our children. If they see that we follow through on the commitments that we make, they will recognize the importance of keeping the promises they make.

Gayleen Rabakukk is a freelance writer who spends her time in Edmond keeping up with her teenage and preschool daughters.

As parents, it is our job to prepare

Catch them doing the

right thing!

Whether the student is a Kindergartner or teen, whether the act is simple or time consuming, we want to hear about your outstanding student. Monthly winner receives a $50 savings bond.

Nominate them for MetroFamily Magazine’s Spotlight on Character Award.

Visit MetroFamilyMagazine.com/spotlight-on-character-award for contest details and nomination forms.

Editor’s Note: This month, MetroFamily will proudly receive the 2009 Character Recognition Award for media businesses from the Character Council of Central Oklahoma.

The award will be given to Sarah Taylor, Publisher, who will accept the award on behalf of the MetroFamily staff and writers who have contributed to the magazine’s character column and Spotlight on Character Award over the last four years. The Character Council’s annual banquet will be held Thursday, September 10th at the National Cowboy and Western Heritage Museum. For tickets to this celebration, call 405-815-0001.

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Spotlight on Character Winner Benjamin Steele displayed the traits of generosity and compassion when he asked his birthday party guests to bring donations for the Regional Food Bank of Oklahoma. Ardis Marrs Steele, Benjamin’s mom, said he had heard his parents talking about the record number of people seeking help from the Food Bank lately. When it was time for his seventh birthday party, Ardis asked if he would like to use his birthday as an opportunity to do something nice for people or animals and Benjamin decided helping the Food Bank would be the best choice.

Guests were asked to bring donations instead of presents, and as a result, Benjamin was able to give 83 pounds of food in addition to cash donations.

Touring the facility was very exciting.

Benjamin said that for his eighth birthday, he’d like to have the party in the volunteer break room at the Regional Food Bank, so all his friends could volunteer there too.

The Steele’s church, First Unitarian of Oklahoma City, volunteers at the Food Bank on a regular basis and Benjamin is looking forward to volunteering there too. Since his party, another one of his friends had a birthday party where he collected donations for the animal shelter. Benjamin is a home-schooled second grade student and is the son of Mike Steele and Ardis Marrs Steele.

September 2009

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Jump for joy!

Jazzercise Center of Edmond 2nd and Bryant at Bryant Square 359-8088 www.edmondjazz.com

$PSO .B[F t )BZ 3JEFT t -BTFS 5BH t 5SBJO 3JEFT 6 1JDL 1VNQLJO 1BUDI t )BVOUFE .B[F PQFO )PVST PG 0QFSBUJPO Mon - Wed call for reservations Thurs. & Fri. -6pm-10pm Sat. - 10am-10pm Closed Sundays -PDBUFE on I-40 between Hydro and Weatherford, Exit 84 (from West) or Exit 88 (from East) and follow Route 66 access road for approximately 3 miles. Look for red barns.

'PS .PSF *OGPSNBUJPO www.pbarfarms.com MPSFO!QCBSGBSNT DPN t

Pò FBDI $PSO .B[F "ENJTTJPO 5JDLFU *Coupon applies to corn maze admission only 34

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The kids are in school– time to get in shape!

September 2009

SEPTEMBER S

Family Fun Smithsonian Magazine has designated Saturday, September 26 as the fifth annual Museum Day, which means free admission to participating museums.

Over 200,000 visitors attended Museum Day last year, at over 900 locations throughout the country and Puerto Rico. This year, over 1,000 museums have elected to participate.

In Oklahoma, participating museums include:

Fifth A

nnual Museum Day

• Confederate Memorial Museum & Cemetery, Atoka; 580-889-7192, CivilWarAlbum.com/Atoka Septemb • Gaylord-Pickens Oklahoma Heritage er 26, 200 9 Museum, OKC; 405-235-4458, OklahomaHeritage.com • Gilcrease Museum, Tulsa; 918-596-2700, Gilcrease.org • Mabee-Gerrer Museum of Art, Shawnee; 405-878-5300, mgmoa.org • Oklahoma History Center, OKC; 405-522-5248, OklahomaHistoryCenter.org • Science Museum Oklahoma, OKC; 405-602-6664, ScienceMuseumOK.org • Tulsa Historical Society & History Museum, Tulsa; 918-712-9484, TulsaHistory.org • Will Rogers Birthplace Ranch, Oologah; 918-275-4201, WillRogers.com/ birthplace/about/about.html • Will Rogers Memorial Museum, Claremore; 918-341-0719, WillRogers.com

PASS

Each pass is good for one adult with a guest, limit of one pass per household.

Visit microsite.SmithsonianMag.com/MuseumDay for more information and to print out the Museum Day pass.

M

T

W

T

F

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1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30

Metropolitan Library System MetroLibrary.org Belle Isle, 5501 N Villa, 843-9601 Bethany, 3510 N Mueller, 789-8363 Capitol Hill, 334 SW 26th, 634-6308 Choctaw, 2525 Muzzy, 390-8418 Del City, 4509 SE 15th, 672-1377 Downtown, 300 Park Ave, 231-8650 Edmond, 10 S Boulevard, 341-9282 Midwest City, 8143 E Reno, 732-4828 Ralph Ellison, 2000 NE 23rd, 424-1437 Southern Oaks, 6900 S Walker, 631-4468 The Village, 10307 N Penn, 755-0710 Warr Acres, 5901 NW 63rd, 721-2616 Harrah, 1930 N Church Ave, 454-2001 Jones, 111 E Main, 399-5471

Weekly

Drop in Art at the OKC Museum of Art. Saturdays, 1-4pm. Create art inspired by the Museum’s collection and exhibitions. FREE with paid admission.

FREE Make & Take craft activities at Lakeshore Learning (6300 N May, OKC), 11am-3pm every Saturday. Ages 3 and up. 858-8778, LakeshoreLearning.com.

Sunday Nature Hikes at Martin Park Nature Center.

Guided park tour and nature hike each Sunday 2:30pm.

Reservations and a fee of $2 are required. 755-0676.

FREE Children’s Story Time at Edmond’s Best of Books, Saturdays, 11-11:30am. 340-9202.

Family Fun Night at JumpZone (SW 104th & Western) 4:30-8pm every Tuesday and Thursday. 2 adults, 2 children, 1 large pizza, 2 liter pop for $25. For open play hours, call 200-1691, JumpZoneParty.com.

FREE StoryTime at Gymboree Penn Square, first Friday of every month, 10am. 842-7540.

Silly Sundays at Unpluggits Playstudio (575 Enterprise Dr, Edmond) Every Sunday, 1-6pm. Free face painting with paid admission or craft purchase. 340-7584, Unpluggits.com.

FREE Children’s Storytime at Full Circle Bookstore (1900 NW Expressway) every Saturday, 10:15am.

842-2900, FullCircleBooks.com.

Luther, 310 NE 3rd, 277-9967 Nicoma Park, 2240 Overholser, 769-9452 Wright Library, 2101 Exchange, 235-5035

Pioneer Library System

FREE Thursday Noon Tunes at the Downtown Library, 11:30-1pm. Free live music each Thursday.

pls.lib.ok.us

FREE Toddler Storytime at the Norman Library. Every Monday 9:30-10am.

McLoud, 133 N Main, 964-2960

FREE Art Adventures at Norman’s Fred Jones Jr. Museum of Art, 10:30am. Activities for children ages 3-5 with adult held each Tuesday.

Newcastle, 705 NW Tenth, 387-5076

Monthly

Blanchard, 300 N Main, 485-2275 Moore, 225 S Howard, 793-5100 Noble, 204 N 5th, 872-5713 Norman, 225 N Webster, 701-2600

Gymboree of Norman Family Arts Studio is held the third Saturday, 11am-noon. Includes arts & crafts for children 18mos–5 years. $5 per child. Reservations required; 307-8454, GymboreeClasses.com.

September 2009

Purcell, 919 N Ninth, 527-5546 Shawnee, 101 N Philadelphia, 275-6353 Tecumseh, 114 N Broadway, 598-5955

www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

35

Quick Reference City Arts Center Fair Park, 3000 Pershing Blvd, OKC 951-0000, CityArtsCenter.org.

Fine Arts Institute of Edmond 27 E. Edwards, Edmond 340-4481, EdmondFineArts.com Fred Jones Jr Museum of Art 555 Elm Ave, Norman 325-3272, ou.edu/fjjma Little River Zoo Hwy 9, Norman 366-7229, LittleRiverZoo.com Myriad Botanical Gardens 301 W Reno, OKC 297-3995, MyriadGardens.com National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum 1700 NE 63rd St, OKC 478-2250, NationalCowboyMuseum.org Oklahoma Aquarium 300 Aquarium Dr, Jenks 918-296-FISH, OKAquarium.org OKC Museum of Art 415 Couch Dr, OKC 236-3100, okcmoa.org OKC National Memorial 620 N Harvey, OKC 235-3313, OklahomaCityNationalMemorial.org OKC Zoo 2101 NE 50th St, OKC 424-3344, OKCZoo.com Oklahoma Children’s Theatre 2501 N Blackwelder, OKC 606-7003, OklahomaChildrensTheatre.org Oklahoma Heritage Center 13th & Shartel, OKC 235-4458, OklahomaHeritage.com

Through September 13

Spirit Red: Visions of Native American Artists from the Rennard Strickland Collection at Norman’s Fred Jones Jr. Museum of Art. Includes paintings, baskets, pottery, textiles and sculpture.

Through September 12 Inside Peanuts: The Life and Art of Charles M. Schulz Exhibit at the Edmond Historical Society.

Featuring art work from Charlie Brown to the whole peanuts gang. 340-0078, Edmond History.org.

Not Just a Housewife: The Changing Roles of Women in the West exhibit at the National Cowboy and Western Heritage Museum focuses on women who tackled non-traditional roles including prospecting, politics, artists and business owners.

Through January 2010

Another Hot Oklahoma Night exhibit at the Oklahoma History Center celebrates rock & roll in Oklahoma.

AnotherHotOklahomaNight.org.

Sept 18-Oct 3

Pinocchio presented by the Oklahoma Children’s Theatre (2501 N Blackwelder). Tickets $5 ages 2-12, $7 13 and up.

Through September 26

Saturday Morning Cartoon Cruises depart at 10am from Regatta park landing, 11:30am from Meridian Landing. Roundtrip tickets $12 adults, $8 children 6-12.

Children under 6 free with paying adult. 702-7755, OKRiverCruises.com.

Through October

Cocktails on the Skyline at the OKC Museum of Art, 5-10:30pm. Every Thursday and Friday. A full bar, complimentary chips and salsa, and the Oklahoma City skyline. All ages are welcome. $12 adults, $10 seniors and students, FREE for members.

Sunset Cruises with the Oklahoma River Cruises.

Every Friday and Saturday, 7:30pm. Enjoy the climatecontrolled cabin with drinks and light hors d’oeuvres. All passengers must be 21 years of age or older to board. $35 per person. 702-7755, OKRiverCruises.com.

Through December

Through January 10, 2010

ConservaStory exhibit at the Myriad Gardens. A tropical adventure of the storybook kind. A pirate ship, giants and fairies.

September 3 • Thursday

FREE Appetite for the Arts Festival in downtown El Reno, 5-10pm. Art show, demonstrations, entertainment and food. 262-8888, ElRenoMainStreet.org.

4 • Friday

Book Drop at Science Museum Oklahoma. Bring a brand new, science-related book and receive a free popcorn and OttoMatic science literacy bookmark.

Books will be donated to the Oklahoma City Metro Literacy Coalition.

4-6

Arcadia Heritage Festival and Rodeo in Arcadia, noon-8pm. Food, games, arts & crafts, toys, African clothing, T-shirts and rodeo. 396-2899

5 • Saturday

FREE Loose Caboose Festival in Purcell, 9am-4pm.

Antiques, collectibles, crafts, art, children’s activities, food and entertainment. LooseCabooseFestival.com.

FREE Michael Payne from Designing for the Sexes visits Suburban Contemporary Furnishings, (201 N Portland) to share his design expertise and secrets.

11am. 946-4387, SuburbanContemporary.com.

Oklahoma History Center 2401 N Laird Ave, OKC 522-5248, OklahomaHistoryCenter.org Sam Noble Oklahoma Museum of Natural History 2401 Chautauqua Ave, Norman 325-4712, snomnh.ou.edu Science Museum Oklahoma 2100 NE 52nd St, OKC 602-6664, ScienceMuseumOK.org

weekly E-Updates keep you in-the-know

Do you have an event for our calendar?

MetroFamilyMagazine.com/ subscribe-to-e-update

Email it to Calendar Editor Terri Fields, Calendar@MetroFamilyMagazine.com.

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September 2009

FREE Drawing and Designing Comics at the Capitol Hill Library, 2-3:15pm. Learn basic techniques, and how to apply them to comic character creations. Registration required.

FREE Tips from the Consumer Queen at the Del City Library, 2-4pm. Expert couponing advice, frugal tips and change the way you shop.

Special celebration of ‘9’ the movie at the Toy and Action Figure Museum in Pauls Valley. 10am-5pm.

FREE giveaways, scavenger hunt and more. 405-2077098; ActionFigureMuseum.com.

5-6

Junior Zookeeper Overnight Camp-out at Little River Zoo, 6pm-8am. Activities involving the zoo’s nocturnal creatures. $59 per child, parents FREE. Ages 5 and up.

366-7229, LittleRiverZoo.com.

5-7

FREE Arts Festival Oklahoma at OKC Community College, 10am-9pm. Variety of fine art, crafts, children’s activities, culinary specialties and live entertainment.

682-7576, OCCC.edu/AFO.

6 • Sunday

FREE Fall Concert at Mitch Park, 6:30pm. Also held 9/13, 20, 27. 359-4630, EdmondOK.com.

7 • Monday

FREE admission to the Sam Noble Oklahoma Museum of Natural History.

8 • Tuesday

Science Stories at the Science Museum Oklahoma, 10:30am and 2:30pm. Free with admission.

10 • Thursday

Get ready for school with Mad Science

Teacher’s Sneak Peek at the Adventure District, 3-7pm. Teachers may visit four locations to learn about educational programs and speak with representatives about educational resources. Pre-register at OKCAdventure.com. 290-PLAY. Kites Over Enid, an event to attempt to break the Guinness Book of World Records for the number of kites in the air at one time, at the intersection of Mullberry and Willow Run. Bring your own kite or buy one for $5. Arrive 11am, event begins 1pm. 232-4232, KitesOverEnid.com.

Hootenanny at the Harn Homestead, 6-10pm.

Tickets $5 in advance; $8 at the door. 235-4058, HarnHomestead.com.

FREE Reading to Dogs at the Warr Acres Library, 6:30-7:30pm. Dogs and their owners help children develop reading skills. For 6 and up.

11 • Friday

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NASA Academy of Future Space Explorers The World Around Me: Pre-K-1st Grade Crazy Chemworks Secret Agent Lab

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Crazy hat day $3 off with hat

FREE Art “a la CART� at the Fred Jones Jr. Musuem of Art, 6-9pm. Hands-on art activities and live music.

The Abe Lemons Golf Classic is hosted by OCU at the Lincoln Park Golf Course. Proceeds benefit the OCU Athletic Department. 208-5660, OCUSports.com Twestival fundraiser at Old Chicago in Edmond for White Fields. Find details on page 13.

(Every Thursday 3-6) (Ever

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11-12

FREE Western Days in Mustang, (Hwy 152 & Mustang Rd) 9am-9pm. Chili cook-off, carnival, open rodeo, parade, car show, pancake breakfast. 376-2758, MustangChamber.com.

The OKC Storytelling Festival at Stage Center in

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www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

37

Baby Faces Making Memories of a Lifetime

Downtown OKC features performances 8pm nightly. $15. 270-4848, ArtsCouncilOKC.com.

FREE Family Health & Safety Day at OSU-OKC, Reno and Portland. 10am-1pm. Moon bounce, face painting and educational activities. 945-3285; osuokc.edu/fhsd

11-13 3D-4D Prenatal Ultrasound 16 years of OB Ultrasound Experience 405.824-AMOM (824-2666) www.BabyFacesofNorman.com Call for information Mention this ad for free diapers!

Bye Bye Birdie at the Sooner Theatre, (101 E Main).

Tickets $25 and up. Also held 9/17-19. 321-9600, SoonerTheatre.org.

11-26

FREE Women’s Health Forum: Back to the Basics at the OKC Marriot. A wide variety of workshops offered including guest speaker Kathryn Joosten (of the West Wing and Desperate Housewives). Registration required. 951-2277, IntegrisOK.com.

12 • Saturday

Junior Zookeeper Day Camp featuring Oklahoma Wildlife at the Little River Zoo, 10am-4pm. Children 5 and up learn about backyard wildlife. $59. 366-7229, LittleRiverZoo.com.

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FREE Founder’s Day in Piedmont, 7:30am-3pm.

Festivities include Makin’ Tracks Run, parade, food, arts & crafts, inflatables, pony rides and live entertainment.

373-0072, PiedmondOKFoundersDay.org.

FREE Septemberfest at the Governor’s Mansion, 10am-5pm. Activities include exhibits, crafts, facepainting, theater, storytelling and demonstrations.

Admission to the Oklahoma History Center is also FREE. 522-0765, OKHistory.org.

FREE Harrah Daze features parade, face painting and children’s activities. Details,

HarrahChamberofCommerce.com.

The OK Chorale’s Heavenly Harmony Barbershop Chorus concert is held at Hardeman Auditorium (2501 E Memorial, Edmond). 2pm or 7:30pm, $15 general admission. 848-SING, OKChorale.org.

My Family at the OKC Museum of Art, 10am and 11am.

Read a story and then visit the special exhibit to look for family pictures. Use paper dolls to create a family portrait. $7 members; $9 non-members. For ages 15-36 months. Registration required.

Bluegrass Music Show at the Western Museum and Hall of Fame, 6:30pm. Performances by Dyson Family, High Strung and From the Heartland. Tickets $6 adults; FREE 12 and under. 485-2370, GOBMS.org.

Edmond Mothers of Multiples Huge Kids Clothing Sale, 8am-2pm. First Church of the Nazarene, 3001 S Boulevard, Edmond. $1 donation admission per family.

473-0372, EdmondMoms.com.

13 • Sunday

FREE Grandparents Day at the OKC Zoo. Guests over 55 receive free admission with a paying child.

Little Acorns and Mighty Oaks at the OKC Museum of Art, 2-4pm. Celebrate Grandparent’s Day with a class that focuses on three-dimension art. $10 members, $15 non-members. For ages 6-9 with grandparent.

Registration required.

14 • Monday

Change a Child Forever Community Gathering for potential foster parents. First Baptist Church of Moore (301 NE 27th). Free dinner, registration required.

522-0606, FaithLinks.org.

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www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

September 2009

UĂŠ `Â“ÂˆÂ˜ÂˆĂƒĂŒiĂ€i`ĂŠLÞÊ>ĂŠV…ˆÂ?`ĂŠ`iĂ›iÂ?ÂœÂŤÂ“iÂ˜ĂŒ ĂŠiĂ?ÂŤiĂ€ĂŒĂŠÂœvÊÓäÊÞi>Ă€ĂƒÂ° UĂŠ/Ă€>ˆ˜i`ĂŠvÂœĂ€ĂŠĂŒÂ…iĂŠ-/ /ĂŠĂƒVĂ€ii˜iÀÊ>ĂŒĂŠ 6>˜`iĂ€LˆÂ?ĂŒĂŠ1Â˜ÂˆĂ›iĂ€ĂƒÂˆĂŒĂžÂ° UĂŠĂ“Ă¤Â‡Â“ÂˆÂ˜Ă•ĂŒiĂŠĂƒVĂ€ii˜ˆ˜}ĂŠ>ĂƒĂƒiĂƒĂƒiĂƒĂŠĂƒÂŽÂˆÂ?Â?ĂƒĂŠĂƒĂ•VÂ…ĂŠ >ĂƒĂŠÂˆÂ“ÂˆĂŒ>ĂŒÂˆÂœÂ˜]ĂŠÂŤÂ?>ÞÊ>˜`ĂŠ`ÂˆĂ€iVĂŒÂˆÂ˜}ĂŠ>ĂŒĂŒiÂ˜ĂŒÂˆÂœÂ˜Â° UĂŠ ÂœÂ˜ĂƒĂ•Â?ĂŒ>ĂŒÂˆÂœÂ˜ĂŠ>vĂŒiĂ€ĂŠĂŒÂ…iĂŠĂƒVĂ€ii˜ˆ˜}ĂŠÂˆĂƒĂŠÂˆÂ˜VÂ?Ă•`i`° Call Gay Snyder M.Ed. at 471-9303 to ďŹ nd out more and schedule your child’s screening.

Gsnyderchilddevelopment.com

Karen’s Kids Studio of Dance

FREE TRIAL CLASS

15 • Tuesday

FREE Tuesday Noon Concerts at the Fred Jones Jr. Museum of Art, noon. Featuring Ricardo Souza Percussion Studio. Also held 9/22, 29.

Crazy Hats at the OKC Museum of Art, 10am. Create your own festive and fun hats using various papers, crayons, and scissors. $7.50 members, $10 nonmembers. For ages 3-5. Registration is required.

15-19

FREE 2009 U.S. Rotax Grand Nationals at the Oklahoma Motor Sports Complex, (3501 S Interstate Dr, Norman), 10am. RMaxChallenge.com.

15-30

FREE Barber Shop Exhibit at the Edmond Historical Society & Museum. Showcases artifacts covering the history of barbershops in Edmond. 340-0078, EdmondHistory.org.

17-19

Noble Oklahoma Museum of Natural History, 6-8:30pm.

Family fun, pizza and a project for ages 5 and up. $10 members; $12 non-members. Registration required.

Friday Night Follies: The Lost Episodes of Okra Oklahoma at The Rodeo Opry Theater, 7:30pm.

Production showcases the finest church soloists from across Oklahoma singing your favorite songs from the last five decades. Tickets $12 adults; $6 children under 12. 503-1532, RodeoOpry.com.

Sept 18-20

Western Heritage Weekend and Oklahoma Indian Summer, Bartlesville and Dewey. 800-364-8708; VisitBartlesville.com.

18-26

The Original Children’s Consignment Sale at Market Plaza (Rockwell and NW Expy) is open 10am-6pm daily (closed Sunday). 721-6776.

19 • Saturday

Disney on Ice presents Worlds of Fantasy at the State Fair grounds, 7:30pm. Showcases characters from Cars, Tinker Bell, The Lion King and The Little Mermaid.

Tickets $14 and up. 800-511-1552, DisneyonIce.com.

FREE Route 66 Classics in the Park Car Show and Craft Fair at Edmond’s Hafer Park, 9am-2pm. Featuring over 200 classic autos, craft fair, food and family fun.

341-3554, EdmondFamilyCounseling.org.

17-27

International Talk like a Pirate Day at the Science Museum Oklahoma. Meet the pirates and learn some of their piratey science. FREE with admission.

Oklahoma State Fair at the State Fairgrounds, 8am.

Includes food, large carnival, exhibits, games, Disney on Ice, PRCA Rodeo, concerts and activities for the kids. Tickets $8 adults, $5 ages 6-11, 5 and under free.

948-6700, OKStateFair.com.

18 • Friday

Family Night Out: Family Game Night at the Sam

FREE American Girl craft at Michaels stores, 10am2pm. Every girl can make her own gifts inspired by American Girl books.Theknackkids.com.

The Anna’s House Foundation of OKC benefit dinner and auction will be held at the Express Events Center Ballroom (8512 N Expy). $25. 513-8225,

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September 2009

www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

39

AnnasHouseFoundation.org.

19-20

Thriving Marriage Retreat for grandparents raising grandchildren. See page 10 for details.

20-26

FREE admission to the Sam Noble Oklahoma Museum of Oklahoma for first responders and military personnel and their immediate families all week.

20 • Sunday

FREE Edmond Living History Social at the Edmond Historical Society & Museum, 2-5pm. Activities include a barbershop quartet, storyteller, old-fashion outside games and cake walk. Children can enjoy balloon art, face painting, and sidewalk art. 340-0078, EdmondHistory.org.

22 • Tuesday

Paragon Ragtime Orchestra at OCCC Bruce Owen Theatre, 7pm. Silent film classics with their original scores played by a 12-piece ragtime orchestra. Tickets $17 and up. 682-7579, OCCC.Edu/CAS. FREE FAA Credit Union’s 3rd Annual College Night at 10201 S Western, 6-8pm. Talk with college representatives, and attend a financial aid seminar.

Open to students, parents and teachers. 682-1990 ext.

1102, FAAECU.org.

24-26

Klassy Kidz Consignment at the New City Shopping Center, (I-35 and 12th, Moore), 9am. Gently used children’s apparel and accessories. 413-1141, KlassyKidzEvent.com.

Tombstone Tales Re-enactment held at Fort Reno at 11am and 2pm. Adults $10, seniors $8 and 12 and under $5; ticket includes Chuckwagon meal. (405) 262-3987; FortReno.org/Calendar.

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25 • Friday

“Liberace” at the Rose State Performing Arts Theatre, 7:30pm. The man, the music and the memories. Tickets $45 and up. 297-2264, UCO.edu/Broadway.

25-27

Day Out with Thomas at the Oklahoma Railway Museum, 8am-6pm. Live music, entertainment, children’s activities, train rides and storytelling. Also held 10/2-4. 424-8222, OklahomaRailwayMuseum.org.

FREE Oklahoma Wildfire Expo at the Lazy E Arena, noon-6pm. Hands-on exhibits, seminars, workshops and demonstrations about wildlife and outdoor activities.

522-6279, WildllifeDepartment.com.

www.ChesterandCrew.com 40

www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

September 2009

26 • Saturday

FREE Fiestas de las Americas 2009 at Capitol Hill (SW 25th between Walker and Santa Fe), 11am-11pm.

Festivities include a parade, nationally known singing talent, local singing and dancing talent, food and arts.

632-0133.

Plants of the Arbuckle Mountains Field Trip Adult Workshop at the Sam Noble Oklahoma Museum of Natural History, 9am-4:30pm. A fact filled mini-adventure through Oklahoma’s scenic Arbuckle Mountains. Cost $55 members; $65 non-members.

Zoorific Day of Character at the OKC Zoo, 9am-3pm.

Activities include a scavenger hunt with prizes, games, and giveaways. Stop by the MetroFamily Magazine booth while you’re there.

Museum Day at local area museums. See page 35 for details.

27 • Sunday

FREE Family Day at Fred Jones Jr. Museum of Art, 1-4pm. Explore American art in the museum’s permanent collection and temporary exhibitions, then enjoy a variety of art activities for the entire family.

October 1-3

Oklahoma International Bluegrass Festival in Guthrie, 10am-10pm. International and national bluegrass bands, children’s activities and workshops.

Tickets $25 and up. 282-6646, OIBF.com.

October 2-3

FREE Rock Island Arts Festival in Chickasha, 10am8pm. Over 30 artisan booths, wine tasting, live music and performances. RockIslandArtsFestival.org.

October 3 • Saturday

FREE Monarch Migration & Butterfly Festival at the Community Park in Cole, 10am-4pm. Learn about butterfly gardening and enjoy arts displays, face painting and food. 485-2962.

FREE Global Oklahoma at Rose State College, 10am5pm. Exhibits, entertainment, food, school displays, arts and children’s activities. 736-0313, Rose.edu/ Commfriend/Globok/index.htm.

FREE Oklahoma Czech Festival in Yukon, 8am-5pm.

Carnival, parade, craft booths, music, dancing, singing and food. 206-8142, OklahomaCzechFestival.org.

FREE Plaza District Festival in the Plaza District. See page 11 for details.

Grand Opening celebration at 105degrees restaurant and academy. See page 10 for details.

Father/Daughter Summit at the Cathedral, 9:30am5pm. See page 31 for details.

There are as many support groups in the Metro as there are needs for them. To include your group in our listing, please email details to Calendar@MetroFamilyMagazine.com.

Childbirth & Babies

Buckle Up and Boogie Workshop at Babies R Us. Expectant parents learn about features and benefits of car safety seats. Last Tuesday of the month, 6:30pm.

840-2820, BabiesRUs.com.

DACO (Doula Association of Central OK), 455-1500, DACOinc.org.

La Leche League meets at Gymboree Play & Music in Norman the second Saturday of each month, 10amnoon. Family Gym is available at $5 per family for partners and children of meeting attendees.

La Leche League breastfeeding information and support. Meetings in Moore and NW OKC. Visit the calendar at MetroFamilyMagazine.com for dates, times, and contact info. lllusa.org.

Counseling & Support

Alzheimer’s Support Group, at the Arbor House (9240 E Reno), third Thursday, 6pm. 455-3900..

Amputees’ Next Step support group, second Tuesday 1-3pm. O’Donoghue Rehabilitation Institute (1122 NE 13th, room 252). OUPhysicians.com.

Birth Parent support group, first Monday, 6-7:30pm.

Deaconess Pregnancy & Adoption Services (5300 N Meridian). 949-4200 ext 13.

Breast Cancer awareness group for women. First Monday, 7pm. Eastside Church of Christ (916 S Douglas), 732-0393.

Breast Cancer support group at the OU Breast Institute (825 NE10th), Suite 3500, third Thursday, noon1pm. Lunch provided; register 271-8001, ext 48592, or 271-8001 ext. 48527.

Breast Cancer Survivor support group, second Thursday, 6:30pm. Young Survival Coalition (for women under 40), third Wednesday, noon. Breast Imaging of OK (2601 Kelley Pointe Pkwy, Edmond).

844-2601 ext 1031.

Celebrate Recovery, Mondays 6pm. Henderson Hills Baptist Church (15th & I-35, Edmond) Hillside Café.

HendersonHills.com.

Crossings Community Church (14600 N Portland) holds a variety of Care Series classes and support groups. 755-2227 or CrossingsOKC.org.

United Methodist Church of the Servant (14343 N MacArthur), holds Discoveries Program classes for adults. Call Gayle 720-8480 for full listing.

DivorceCare, Wednesdays 7:45pm. Henderson Hills Baptist Church (15th & I-35, Edmond) Room 100.

HendersonHills.com.

Divorce Recovery Group, Wednesdays at 7pm, Quail Springs Church of Christ (14401 N May), room 308.

755-4790.

Family Support Group for leukemia, lymphoma, and myeloma survivors and caregivers, second Tuesday, 6pm. Mercy Cancer Center, 943-8888.

MOMS Club (Moms Offering Moms Support) activity groups meet in Edmond, OKC, Moore, Midwest/Del City and Norman. MOMSClub.org.

Free drug and alcohol addiction classes offered by A Chance to Change Foundation at the Last Frontier Council Scout Service Center (3031 NW 64th), 6:308pm Mondays. 840-9000, AChanceToChange.org.

MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) support groups meet in Choctaw, Norman, Edmond, Yukon and OKC. Visit MetroFamilyMagazine.com/Calendar for dates, times, and contact info.

GriefShare, Thursdays 7pm. Henderson Hills Baptist Church (15th & I-35, Edmond) Room 100.

HendersonHills.com.

Edmond’s Mothers of Multiples, second Thursday at Edmond Hospital, 7pm. 285-5208 and 315-0338, EdmondMoms.com.

Grief Support Group, Wednesdays at 7pm, Quail Springs Church of Christ (14401 N May), room 110.

755-4790.

Special Needs

Grief Support Group, at the Arbor House (9240 E Reno), every other Wednesday, 3pm. 455-3900.

Parents Fighting Autism, St. Stephens United Methodist Church, Norman, third Monday of the month at 7pm. Meeting time subject to change please contact parentsfightingautism@gmail.com.

Head Injury Support Group, third Tuesday at 5100 N Brookline, Suite 100, 6-8pm.

BrainInjuryOklahoma.org/okc.

OKC Area Stuttering Support Group for adults. Third Tuesday, 6:30-7:30pm. First United Methodist Church, 303 E Hurd, Edmond. okcssg@yahoo.com.

H.O.P.E. Gynecologic Cancer Support at the OU Physicians Building, (5th floor) the first Saturday of each month at 10am. 271-8001 ext 48165, 672-1748.

Grandparents Raising Grandchildren support group for grandparents and other relatives raising children.

First and third Tuesday, 6pm, Trinity Church of the Nazarene. 634-4400 ext. 140.

Leukemia & Lymphoma Society-sponsored Family Support Group. First Thursday, 6pm, Integris Baptist Medical Center. 943-8888.

Leukemia & Lymphoma Society-sponsored Spanish-Speaking Group. First Tuesday, 6pm at Integris Southwest Medical Center, 636-7560; and first Wednesday, 5pm at the 7th floor Conference room, Presbyterian Tower, OU Medical Center, 271-7930.

Mondays Friends Breast Cancer Support Group second Monday, 7pm. Midwest Regional Breast Care Center. 610-8872, jean.pitzer@mrmc.hma-corp.com.

Myeloma Support Group. Third Thursday, 6pm, 7th floor Conference room, Presbyterian Tower, OU Medical Center, 271-6557.

Pancreatic Cancer support group, last Thursday, 6pm. O’Donoghue Research Building (1122 NE 13th Street), 3rd Floor Surgery Research Conference Room.

271-2108 or ouhsc.edu/surgery/pancan.

Parents of Children with Cancer support group, second Wednesday at noon (complimentary lunch).

Children’s Hospital (930 NE 13th). 943-8888.

Parents Helping Parents confidential meetings for parents of children who abuse drugs. First and third Tuesdays. Oklahoma Blood Institute in Edmond, 6428198, ParentsHelpingParents.info.

Parenting Groups

Mom’s Got Connections Christian group for moms with young children (birth-5yrs). Chapel Hill United Methodist Church, OKC, 9:30-11am Tuesdays. jlreser@ yahoo.com or 720-7164.

CHADD ADD/ADHD support meeting, second Tuesday at 7pm. Deaconess Medical Offices North. 7221ADD, 419-4176, or CHADD.org.

The free Talking Hands sign language class meets Thursdays, 6:30-7:30pm, 300 N Air Depot, Midwest City.

Talkinghands@rocketmail.com.

Hope Link meetings for parents of special-needs children or children with undiagnosed disorders. Integris Baptist Medical Center, first Thursday, 6pm. 271-5072, OKCHopeLink.org.

4 • Friday

FREE Gluten Free Eating Workshop at Integris SW Medical Center (4401 SW Western), 9am. Reservations, 951-2277.

12 • Saturday

FREE Baby Safety Day at Babies R Us, noon-3pm.

Includes product demonstrations and baby-proofing tips. BabiesRUs.com.

16 • Wednesday

FREE Baby Signs Workshop at the Village Library, 3pm. Parents of children 9-22 months will learn approximately 50 signs. Registration required.

October 1 • Thursday

FREE Andrew Weil M.D. speaks at OCU’s Freede Center, 7:30pm. Dr. Weil in one of the world’s foremost authorities on health, wellness, integrative medicine.

943-3291, IntegrisMindBodySpirit.com.

September 2009

www.MetroFamilyMagazine.com

41

The Father Life An Outsider’s Perspective

I

don’t have a child with special needs, but I’m in awe of those who do. Not because parents of special needs children are perfect or super-human (I take that back, they are super-human), but because my friends with special needs children consistently overcome challenges that continually humble and teach me.

Growing up, I had very limited exposure to children with special needs. However, now with a sister-in-law with cerebral palsy and several close friends who have special needs children, I’ve been taught

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through example about the core values I need to have as a parent. So, as an outsider to the world of special needs, here is one person’s perspective on the values we should all learn from these amazing people.

Resilience. One of the most amazing things I’ve noticed in parents of special needs children is a deep resilience that develops despite the challenges faced. It’s something that I need more of. A spirit of “we’ll get through this no matter what” that drives through life’s ups and downs. It reminds us that we’re all capable of much more than we think we are.

Love them “even when.” I love my children dearly, but we do have our moments. But parents of special needs kids have demonstrated to me an undying love that always moves on from the rough patches with no baggage. Our kids need us to forget the fight we had with them and give them the benefit of a fresh page. Again. And again. And again. It’s called patience and graciousness, and our children won’t learn it if we don’t demonstrate it.

Acceptance. 20/20 Medical Mysteries recently aired a story about Carly Fleischmann, a severely autistic 14-yearold girl who has begun communicating through typing. While on the outside she is severely autistic, her communication has revealed a normal teenage girl with a wicked sense of humor. She writes, “I am autistic, but that is not who I am.

It is hard because no one understands me. People look at me and assume I am dumb because I can’t speak. come bounce at our indoor play center!

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All of our children are wonderful creatures who bring joy to our lives if we only listen to and love them for who they are.

People get a lot of their information from so-called experts, but if a horse is sick, you don’t ask a fish what’s wrong with the horse. You go right to the horse’s mouth.” Carly’s parents’ experience reinforces that we need to love and accept our children despite initial outward appearances. All of our children are wonderful creatures who bring joy to our lives if we only listen to and love them for who they are. (I would urge you to go online, search for ‘Carly Fleischmann 2020,’ and watch the episode; it’s powerful!)

Creating Change. Probably the hardest fight I’ve seen parents with special needs children take on is the fight against systems that work against them.

School systems, medical systems, legal systems—there are so many crushing obstacles, I can’t even begin to count them all. The hard and simple fact is the world is not set up for special needs kids. Thanks to many determined parents, that is changing. But all of us need to fight for smarter laws and more informed policies, and we must embody a more accepting society.

Ben Murphy is the Founder of TheFatherLife.com, the men’s magazine created for dads. He lives in New York with his wife and three daughters.

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