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NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 · VOL . 25, NO. 38 · SAN JOSE, CA · FREE E]did\gVe] Wn ;Za^eZ 7j^igV\d $ E]did ^aajhigVi^dc Wn @VgV 7gdlc E]di d\gVe] Wn ;Za^eZ 7j^igV\d $ E]ddid ^aajhigVi^dc Wn @VgV 7gdlc

Win Wi W Win Wi in in n Tickets to Cirque du Soleil’s OVO | Dinner at Il Fornaio METROGIVEAWAYS.COM

silicon valley’s weekly newspaper

the church’s new colors Devout Catholics are coming out of the closet, and San Jose’s diocese is a leader in welcoming them BY JESSICA FROMM


[02]

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y HOME OF FAST, FRIENDLY, COURTEOUS SERVICE.®

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Fry's Electronics, American Express® Cards, MasterCard, Visa Card, and Discover Network Card, Accepted at All Fry's Locations

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[03]

HOME OF FAST, FRIENDLY, COURTEOUS SERVICE.®

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[04] CONTENTS

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

Cover Silicon Valley’s Weekly Newspaper

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009

[05]


[06] LETTERS

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

palm of his hand and held it close to his heart. Greeted with a standing ovation as he walked onstage and before even one note of music was heard, he captured the audience by his mere presence. Nearly every song was followed by a standing ovation. And when he softly whispered his poetry into the microphone with his husky voice, it was as if the audience held its collective breath in utter silence to catch every delicate syllable— moments of intimacy shared by a near-capacity audience. And yet it felt as if you were the only person to whom his heartfelt words were being spoken. An enchanted evening, held spellbound by the poet king: Leonard Cohen—the Rumi of our time. Morma Pezzini San Jose “Readers can be forgiven for assuming that the arrestee was male, based on the gender-neutral item last week. The correspondent, though, was female and was arrested, jailed and released in her panties. —Editor

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Bravo Gary Thank you to journalist Gary Singh for the most amazing and extremely well-researched and passionately written feature on Leonard Cohen’s 75 years of his sentimentally poetic, vocal and musical journey (“The Poet King,� Cover Story, Nov. 11). I must regrettably and apologetically admit that I was

not familiar with this extraordinary artist till I was invited by my young nephew to attend Mr. Cohen’s sold-out concert in Israel last summer. My Holy Land’s annual visit and experience this time was deďŹ nitely enriched by this concert. Gary Singh’s very informative, intuitive and touching article ignited my renewed curiosity and personal interest to see and hear again Leonard Cohen’s

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performance in San Jose.. Bravo Gary and bravo Leonard! Lina Broydo Los Altos Hills

Poet King If music is the wine that ďŹ lls the cup of silence, then I was very drunk on Friday (Nov. 13), when Leonard Cohen came to town. Leonard held the audience in the

Partying in Panties If the individual writing this rant (“Pantless CUI,� I Saw You, Nov. 11) was stupid enough to be drunk in public wearing only his underwear, I’m hard pressed to understand his grievance. In fact, I wish I’d seen him

riding the bus in his skivvies. I would have enjoyed the laugh. Gilda Vincent San Jose

Liquidity Did you know that there are no “newâ€? water supplies? The water we have now is the same water that was here with the dinosaurs. Our blue planet, Planet Water, is comprised of 70 percent water, yet only 1 percent of that is accessible freshwater. Yet since the Industrial Revolution, we have polluted half of that 1 percent! So now globally, our clean accessible freshwater supplies are down to 0.5 percent. This truly makes water our most precious resource as people are literally dying around the globe for a drink. We need to acknowledge the incredible importance that water plays in our lives, in every organism’s life; that water is a lubricant, hydrating the body and planet to maintain functionality. The importance of water needs to be reected in our built environments. We need to educate ourselves, gain ecological and hydro literacy and take a larger ecosystems view. We need to consider how our actions affect the planet’s ability to sustain life, ours and every other living creature. I recently watched an inspiring lecture concerning water by Brock Dolman, and I stress to anyone who loves clean water to do some research and learn about this vital resource. Summer Swallow Forestville

J!Tbxzpv Pantless Ranter In response to ‘Pantless CUI’ (I Saw You, Nov. 1): I’m a San Jose Bike Party rider, and the July ‘No Pants’ ride was my ďŹ rst ride. There were a lot of drunken assholes on that ride, and plenty more on subsequent rides. I’ve seen plenty of inebriated riders cause accidents and damage property. San Jose Bike Party does not condone drinking and cycling. It’s illegal and dangerous. They also don’t condone riding the sidewalk. This is expressly written in their ‘How We Ride’ statement on the website. Too bad she got nailed a block from home. She got what she deserved and is obviously bitter that she got caught! This was no different than the riders that were ticketed for failing to stop at a red light or some other trafďŹ c violation along the ride. Just because a bunch of other people were doing it, does not mean it’s OK! SEND US your anonymous rants, raves, gripes and diatribes about your co-workers, bosses, enemies or any badly behaving citizen who rankles your ire—or about citizens you admire. Send to: I SAW YOU, Metro, 550 S. First St., San Jose, 95113,or via email to isawyou@metronews.com.

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009

[07]

WE BUY YOUR CLOTHES, SHOES & ACCESSORIES &855(17 67</(6 ´ :20(1Ê6 0(1Ê6 ´ &$6+ 21 7+( 6327 12 $332,170(17 1(&(66$5< ´ )5,(1'/< %8<(56

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SAN JOSE: 1959 west san carlos 408.292.6622 SAN JOSE: 1008 blossom hill rd. #e 408.269.9025 SANTA CRUZ: 811 pacific ave. 831.458.2555 www.crossroadstrading.com

PHOTO: ALANNA WILLIAMS


Courses Starting in December

[08] SILICON ALLEYS

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

Courses Still Available This Year Did you make a New Year’s resolution at the beginning of this year to make strides in your career and get on track for a brighter professional future? 2010 is almost here, but at UCSC Extension in Silicon Valley, there’s still time to get closer to your goals! Take a look at the courses available to get you started before the end of 2009.

ALL COURSES AT OUR NEW LOCATION 2505 Augustine Drive, Santa Clara Q

Business and Management Project Management Office, 0829-013, Starts Dec. 1 Project Management Negotiation Principles and Techniques, 1493-040, Starts Dec. 5 Designing Training Programs, 3132-042, Starts Dec. 3 Usability Testing Documentation, Online, 0684-014, Starts Dec. 7

Q

Engineering and Technology Cloud Computing, Introduction, 22413-001, Starts Dec. 5

Q

Biosciences Bioscience Business Development: Building Value, 19001-009, Starts Dec. 3 Biotechnology Basics for Non-Scientists, 6163-021, Starts Dec. 5

See ucsc-extension.edu/tm for directions, course details and to enroll

SiliconValley

KNOWLEDGE YOU PUT TO WORK

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GARY SINGH

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HIS WEEKEND, the campaign to designate a Little Italy neighborhood in San Jose will blossom even more when a gala fundraising dinner erupts on Saturday (Nov. 21) at 100 N. Almaden Ave. The Little Italy San Jose committee will host a grand-scale evening of authentic Italian cuisine and entertainment—a multipronged effort to raise $200,000 for an official Italian business and cultural district. The funds will go toward three new gateway arches to the old River Street neighborhood, plus murals depicting Italian-American history in Santa Clara County to be installed underneath the Guadalupe Freeway underpass. The Little Italy committee consists of various Italian-American organizations, plus anyone else interested in Italian culture. River Street itself no longer exists, but the area in question roughly begins at the tiny stretch of Almaden Boulevard containing Henry’s Hi-Life, then goes east along St. John Street underneath the Highway 87 overpass and then almost to San Pedro Square. What’s now referred to as the Old River Street District, especially along St. John, was San Jose’s first Italian-American settlement from the 1870s to 1900, so the location is perfect. As of right now, a slew of historic homes line Almaden Boulevard going north from Henry’s. Some of them are renovated, while others are dilapidated. Behind the houses, one finds a quintessential Italian-style courtyard that connects through to Guadalupe River Park. The homes will eventually accommodate restaurants, bars or shops. Two leases have already been negotiated, with others in the works. Joshua DeVincenzi Melander is the kingpin behind the effort. “In this desolate economy,” he says, “this is actually something exciting that’s going on in this part of downtown.” If you’re unfamiliar with the area, you can go to the Little Italy website (www. littleitalysj.com) and view a neat video of Melander walking through the neighborhood while explaining everything. They plan to use the abandoned Value Business Products building for a new Italian Cultural Center. The site also contains information on how to join their “Sponsor a Brick” program. For $100–$500, friends, families or corporations can purchase one of the engraved cobblestone bricks that will be embedded in the sidewalks and crosswalks. Also, the fundraising dinner happens to be in the same building formerly used by the second-most-recent version of the San Jose Earthquakes soccer club. The blue awnings are still there, although somewhat dusty, and the building has been empty for four years now. Just next door to the Peralta Adobe, it will eventually be part of the San Jose Public Market. Which brings us to another interesting aspect of this endeavor. The What’s now referred to Little Italy neighborhood will extend as the Old River Street almost to San Pedro Square, which is lock-solid Irish country, owned and District was San Jose’s commandeered by a former mayor of first Italian-American yore. In addition to the urban market, settlement from the that mayor has another grand-scale 1870s to 1900, so the plan for an Irish Technology Center. All of this should add up to a killer location is perfect time when the World Cup takes place next summer. There should be giant screens outdoors in both Little Italy and San Pedro Square broadcasting the games all the way from South Africa—just like you’ll see in many town squares throughout Europe. No sporting event on Earth brings people together—especially Europeans—like the World Cup, so I see no reason why San Jose shouldn’t stage a gigantic celebration. It would make the area a killer place to congregate, and it would bring thousands to the neighborhood. Above all else, the Little Italy project is a grassroots effort that is honestly trying to do something to revitalize a decrepit, thrown-away splotch of downtown. And they are raising money to do it. They are not storming City Hall with illiterate banners and bullhorns demanding St. John Street be renamed Little Pompeii, or something similar. Many items will be auctioned off during the gala dinner, including concert tickets, Italian art, a Lake Tahoe trip and even a vacation stay in Tuscany, courtesy of Spirit of Italy Tours. Italian-born tenor and SJSU music major Pasquale Esposito will also perform. If you go, please request “Arrivederci Roma.” What’s your favorite neighborhood? SiliconAlleys.com

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 MASHUP

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A roundup of news, commentary and opinion from around the valley. Opinions expressed do not necessarily reect Metro’s editorial views.

Twitter’s New Headquarters

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NEWS NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

Santa Clara Valley, California

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“If the Unemployment Rate Keeps Going Up, We Can Really Save Some Lives.”

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Judy Chirco’s Challenge The San Jose City Council member brings a familiar determination to her battle with cancer By Laura Fishman AN JOSE Vice Mayor Judy Chirco stands on the floor in the council chambers on a Tuesday afternoon wearing a pink ribbon on her business suit. She looks around to see Mayor Chuck Reed standing beside her and her fellow councilmembers surrounding her in a tight-knit semicircle. With a smile, she proceeds to give each of the councilmembers a hug. As Chirco breaks away from the group, Ash Kalra of District 2 hands her a glass plaque awarding

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her for the “strength, courage and resolve” she has shown during her fight against breast cancer. Looking down at the award, Chirco’s eyes start to tear up. Chirco was diagnosed with breast cancer in December 2008. Though she’s not very public about the subject, Chirco has become a behind-the-scenes supporter of many charities and a cancer awareness activist. “We admire her for her courage to continue doing what’s a physically demanding

job for a person in good health,” Councilman Sam Liccardo says. “For a person who is experiencing everything from chemotherapy to radiation therapy, it’s got to be an incredible burden just to show up.” The affection for Chirco predates her illness. She is known as a pragmatist who makes decisions based on merits rather than political ties. Mayor Reed refers to Chirco as the “conscience of the floor.” “I think everybody on the council values her judgment

200,000

41,000 Number of women

30,000 Number of Bay Area

who will die from breast cancer this year

residents who participated in this year’s Making Strides Against Breast Cancer walk

Number of women in the United States who are living with breast cancer

November 18-24, 2009 because of her calm, thoughtful approach,” Reed says. “She is a very good person to work with because there’s no BS involved. There’s definitely no game play with Judy.” Liccardo agrees. “She’s the most principal councilmember on the floor, as far as I’m concerned,” he says Her public service has been focused on education and environmental justice. For the past five years, she has worked with San Jose’s Schools/City Collaborative, collaborating with the city’s 20 superintendents. She has been a successful champion of Homework Centers and other after-school programs. Her passion for education came long before she was elected to the City Council. Before entering politics, Chirco worked for 20 years in the Cambrian School District. Chirco was active in establishing San Jose as a center for green technology. She recently pushed for a recycled water distribution system in the San Jose Airport last year, when airport developments were being made. And she was one of the leading advocates for the city’s controversial plastic-bag ban. She also chairs the Healthy Neighborhood Venture Fund (HNVF) program, where she developed programs geared toward tobacco prevention, fitness and education improvement. With five years on HNVF, Chirco launched after-school care groups, counseling services, senior-wellness programs and health education services. She says she still has the same passion for improving the city that she did she did seven years ago when she started the position— even as she fights for her life. “I refused to let it get me down,” says Chirco. “It doesn’t mean that I don’t get sick from chemo. It doesn’t mean that I don’t feel bad at times. But it does mean that I keep going.”

600

Number of locals who volunteer with the American Cancer Society each year


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 NEWS

Local Girl Ed and Judy Chirco met in the 1960s while attending West Valley College, and both later transferred to San Jose State. Married for 41 years, they have two sons, Matt and Steve, both of whom attended public school in the Cambrian School District. Steve Chirco recently returned from military service in Iraq. Ed Chirco is known in local circles as the life of the party. “There’s nothing shy about Ed,” Judy says. “Ed’s the perfect spouse for any politician,” Liccardo says, “because he doesn’t mind being dragged to any of these events. And he usually has a better time than anybody else in the room.” It was Ed Chirco who first urged Judy to enter politics. As a room parent and active PTA mom, she believed education needed to be given a higher priority when it comes to government spending. So when a seat opened up on the Cambrian School Board, Ed Chirco saw his wife as the perfect candidate for the position and encouraged her to take on the leadership role. During Chirco’s time on the school board, academic achievement rose for 11 consecutive years in the district. When she started in 1992, the district was ranked in the bottom quartile by the state, and when she left the board in 2003 to join the City Council, the state ranked the school in the top quartile. While she developed a reputation as a feisty leader, Chirco also could be hardheaded when it came to money. The school had faced budgetary problems at the time, so she organized parcel tax collections for school bonds. She also brought new programs into the schools, including physical education. Barry Groves, who used to be the superintendent of the Cambrian School District, says he’s a big Chirco fan. “She’s a good problem solver, always thinking about the future,” he says. “But I’d say her greatest [accomplishment] was her role as an ambassador for the kids.” In addition to her work on the board, Chirco volunteered in her son’s school as a classroom tutor. She also worked with People Acting in Community Together (PACT) as a community organizer, where she fought for more alternative education and after-school programs. One might say that Chirco volunteered her way into public office. She decided to run for the District 9 City Council seat in 2002 when John Diquisto termed out. Chirco faced a tough battle. Her opponent, Chris Hemingway, had worked alongside Diquisto for seven years as his aide. The 33-year-old knew the ropes at City Hall and had established relationships. He also had a significantly larger campaign war chest than Chirco. At the time, he was considered a shoo-in for the job. Yet Chirco prevailed on election day—

capturing almost 60 percent of the popular vote. “It was ‘eye on the prize,’” Chirco says, reflecting on how she was able to pull off her conquest. “Don’t look left, don’t look right. Don’t be distracted by chaos.” Ed Chirco believes his wife’s success had to do with her deep ties to the district. “Chris wasn’t really connected to the community like Judy was, and it really showed,” Ed Chirco recalls. “Judy was able to put a face to City Council.” After living in the Cambrian community for more than 40 years, Judy Chirco had become something of a neighborhood celebrity. School board member, homework tutor, baseball mom, church teacher and volunteer with the Santa Clara County Health Plan. And if there was somebody in Cambrian who didn’t know Judy Chirco, they probably knew Ed, who coached Little League and volunteered at the Cambrian United Methodist Church. Hemingway had only lived in District 9 for one year. Voters surmised he had moved to the area just so he could run for City Council. In her seven years on the council, Chirco has earned a reputation as a quiet renegade. When asked who her closest allies are on the council, Chirco responds with a puzzled look and says she doesn’t think she has any. “I always vote by the issue, not the person,” she says. That has made Chirco the swing vote on a lot of key issues. She placed a deciding vote with several issues, including rejecting greater access to police records and preserving Santana Row’s commercial space. “People often divide us into camps about who’s with the mayor, who’s with labor, and all that kind of stuff,” Liccardo says. “But Judy doesn’t really fit into any of that.” While her votes are occasionally unpredictable, she stands as a consistent voice on the council for progressive environmental initiatives. On the Transportation and Environment Committee, Chirco made a motion last year to recommend that the council adopt a “Green Cities Sustainability Resolution,” which approved emission reduction standards for city vehicle fleets and ensured that the city purchases “100 percent post-consumer recycled” paper for all operations. Chirco also took on a leadership role when it came to adopting new, innovative green-building policies. Last year, she pushed for new standards in the private sector by making a motion—again controversial—to approve mandatory green building guidelines with private-sector construction projects.

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NEWS NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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The Fight of Her Life While Chirco wears many hats in the San Jose community, she chooses not to wear a wig. After her cancer treatment and chemotherapy, she lost all her hair last spring, and now walks proudly as a patient battling breast cancer. “I’ve got this striking new hairdo, which can be any color I choose to make it,” she says while stroking her thin hair with a huge grin. The people who are closest to Chirco express sadness, yet she almost brushes it off. Meanwhile, Ed Chirco battles an illness of his own. Earlier this year he was diagnosed with melanoma and had to undergo surgery. “We went through cancer together, and I still don’t know what she’s going through, and I can’t say that I knew what she felt,” Ed Chirco says. “It’s kind of an awakening,” she says. “Now, I have a self-awareness.” Chirco is one of 200,000 women in the United States fighting breast cancer. By the end of 2009, the American Cancer Society (ACS) estimates, 41,170 women will have died this year from the disease, making it the second most deadly cancer just behind lung cancer. “If I can in any way serve as a model or form of support, I would be touched and honored,” Chirco says. “Because there are so many around me going through the same thing.” In Santa Clara County there are five ACS office locations, where each chapter promotes community events and cancer education programs. On Oct. 31, ACS held its second annual Making Strides Against Breast Cancer Walk to promote awareness and raise money for a cure. In San Jose and San Francisco, ACS supporters wrangled 600 volunteers and 30,000 walkers, raising over $1 million. The city of San Jose dedicated a lot time, funding and resources in order to ensure

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that the event was a success. People working with the city promoted the event, hired security and gave ACS access to city streets and Guadalupe Park. Paige McKinnon, an event coordinator with ACS, loves that the city dedicates so much effort to the cause. McKinnon met Chirco at the Oct. 27 City Council meeting, when Chirco was honored. After the meeting McKinnon said she was amazed by how much love Chirco has from the community.

While Chirco wears many hats in the San Jose community, she chooses not to wear a wig “It’s incredibly inspiring to see her become the advocate,” McKinnon says. “And it’s moving that she has so much support. It just shows that you really can’t fight cancer alone.” Having completed her regimen of treatments, Chirco thanked McKinnon and the American Cancer Society at the meeting for helping so many cancer patients in the United States facing challenges of the disease. “There are committed groups that are looking for a cure, but what so many of us are looking for is the living,” Chirco said. “I am living testimony to the love and compassion that lifts you up when you are down, carries you through the rough places, and allows you to celebrate with joy when you are able to.” News Editor Eric Johnson: eric@metronews.com

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 COVER STORY

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Secretly, San Jose is the most gay-friendly diocese in the nation. And now, one parish wants the world to know. By Jessica Fromm

A

BEARDED PRIEST in brightgreen vestments lifts a rainbowadorned chalice as he delivers the Eucharistic Prayer, consecrating the bread and wine for the sacrament of Communion. Surrounding him, a dozen people link hands around an altar inside a tiny, dimly lit chapel at St. Martin of Tours Catholic Parish in San Jose. “Lift up your hearts,” the priest says. “We lift them up to the Lord,” responds the congregation in unison. “Let us give thanks to the Lord, our God.” “It is right to give him thanks and praise.” This is the Emmaus Mass, the only bishop-sanctioned gathering for gay and lesbian Catholics in the Diocese of San Jose. Held on Saturday evenings inside a small glass room, this quiet, subdued gathering of older men and women focuses on being a safe place of support for Silicon Valley’s LGBT Catholic community and their families. During his homily, the presiding priest talks about the struggle to accept oneself. He asks the parishioners to pray for those who do not understand them and encourages them to not become frustrated if they experience nonacceptance from their loved ones. Behind the priest, through floorto-ceiling panes of glass, parishioners can look out on the rows of pews in the empty, darkened main church space. The following Sunday morning, a different kind of mass is being held at a

humble, suburban Catholic parish in south San Jose. St. Julie Billiart Parish sits at the base of the dry, rolling foothills near Santa Teresa Park, surrounded by tract homes. No grand statues or opulent stained glass adorns the slope-roofed exterior of the unobtrusive church. Inside, a large, diverse, family-oriented crowd has gathered for a much more jubilant service. St. Julie’s pastor, Rev. Jon Pedigo, leads the liturgical music at the 11:30am mass, backed by a teenage band. Singing at the top of his lungs, he pounds out songs on a grand piano while his Birkenstock-clad feet thump the instrument’s pedals. Today’s gospel reading is the story of Bartimaeus, a blind beggar who called out to Jesus for pity, though the people of Jericho tried to silence him. Pacing between pews filled with seniors, children, teens, families and gay couples, Pedigo breaks down the story as he delivers his homily. “Physical sight was Bartimaeus’ issue,” he says, “but the real sin was the blindness in the seeing-people around him. Seeingpeople see skin color, status, age, gender, weight, orientation, education level, etc. They do not see the real you.” “Those we silence at our convenience. Have pity on me!” he prays. “Those whose life partners embarrass us in polite company. Have pity on me!” “In my heart, I believe we are at the brink of a great awakening in our global community. I believe that as the upper echelons of ecclesial power worry themselves with the window dressings of Christian tradition and thus fade into

irrelevance, there will be a renaissance of a more ‘radical’ or ‘root’ Christian faith.” The Diocese of San Jose has long been one of the most gay-friendly Roman Catholic ecclesiastical territories in the United States. Few people know this, and many in the local Catholic community would like it stay that way. On the orders of former Bishop Roland Pierre DuMaine and current Bishop Patrick Joseph McGrath, the diocese has been able to offer ministry and support to local gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) Catholics for more than 20 years by operating under the radar. Recently, progressive Catholic leaders and members of the San Jose religious community are working to change this tentative approach to gay Catholic ministry. In fact, led by Pedigo, St. Julie Billiart Parish has developed a strong following among Silicon Valley’s gay Catholics. Currently, the church’s pastoral staff is considering a proposal to take even more open and bold steps toward the establishment of church-directed LGBT outreach, along with helping other parishes extend a hand to their own gay parishioners. In light of President Barack Obama’s speech at the Human Rights Campaign dinner last month, and with Maine’s gay marriage law being repealed Nov. 3, more and more American Catholics are calling for the opening of a dialogue on the church’s stance on homosexuality and marriage equality. As the outlook 17


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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 COVER STORY

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for gay rights in the church looks grim, a few progressive Catholic communities are making grassroots efforts to include everybody at the Lord’s table, no matter their race, economic status or sexual orientation. Still, the Vatican continues to assert that gay marriage is one of the biggest threats to morality in the modern world, and that homosexuality is a pitiable, “intrinsically disordered” condition no different from alcoholism. LGBT-identifying Catholics face a battle for acceptance even in the Bay Area, where there is perhaps more tolerance and support than anywhere. Even the few clergy members who acknowledge the gay Catholic community feel that they have to keep their ministry on the down low. Many fear retaliation by conservative Catholic factions if they upset the apple cart, particularly those who supported Proposition 8 last year, like Oakland Bishop Salvatore Cordileone, who helped spearhead the initiative. Just last week, the Archdiocese of Washington, D.C., announced its intention to withdraw all church-funded social services should the D.C. City Council legalize same-sex marriage. Another obstacle to acceptance comes this Nov. 16, when the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops gathers in Baltimore to review its new pastoral

statement titled “Marriage: Love and Life in the Divine Plan.” If approved, this official statement will be the final nail in the coffin for gay marriage in the eyes of the Catholic Church, establishing it as the most anti-LGBT religious institution in the United States.

The Sinners And the Sin The U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops’ official teaching on homosexuality is that same-sex orientation in itself is not a sin, because it is not subject to one’s free will. However, the bishops state that being gay is an “intrinsically disordered” condition, and that people who choose to act on their homosexual inclinations are engaging in sin. “While the Church teaches that homosexual acts are immoral, she does distinguish between engaging in homosexual acts and having a homosexual inclination” says the USCCB’s official statement “Ministry to Persons With a Homosexual Inclination,” released in 2006. “While the former is always objectively sinful, the latter is not. Although one would be morally culpable if one were voluntarily to entertain homosexual temptations or to choose to act on them, simply having the tendency is not a sin.” 18

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The statement goes on to lay out how gay men and lesbians should always choose lives of celibacy. In the church’s view, the only reason that people should ever act on their sexuality is for the direct purpose of procreation. Church leaders have concluded that the sole aim of homosexual relationships is narcissistic genital sexual gratification, which is a sin. “Always Our Children,” a USCCB pastoral statement published in 1997, has become the go-to guide for how Catholic parishes, like St. Julie Billiart, are supposed to treat gay individuals. It encourages families to accept and love their gay sons and lesbian daughters when they come out, while at the same time encouraging them to completely abstain from sex. “You can help a homosexual person in two general ways,” says Always Our Children. “First encourage him or her to cooperate with God’s grace to live a chaste life. Second, concentrate on the person, not on the homosexual orientation itself. . . . All in all, it is essential to recall one basic truth. God loves every person as a unique individual.” Rev. Jim Schexnayder, a retired priest and co-founder of the Catholic Association

for Lesbian & Gay Ministry (CALGM) in Berkeley, says that Always Our Children is not based in reality. However, he says, the fact that it even offers support to LGBT Catholics was groundbreaking when it was released. “It’s been the most positive pastoral statement that has come out of our church in this regard, and it’s effectively helped to start most [LGBT] ministries around the country,” says Schexnayder. “In the last 10 years, it’s really been the impetus for many ministries to develop support on the diocesan and parish level. It’s been a resource for education.” Schexnayder says that although the church apposes gay marriage and gay sexual relationships, he is encouraged by the fact that Always Our Children says that gay parishioners should continue to be part of Catholic communities. “It depends on the person and how they receive it,” he says. “It has a lot to do with being in support of parents in a compassionate and loving way, and being in support of gay and lesbian people. It says that you are a child of God created for a purpose in God’s design. That’s a very positive statement for many people, that


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Massachusetts. He taught four courses on the relationship between homosexuality and the church while doing his research. “My question to the official teachers of the church, the clergy and especially the bishops, is: Where are the studies that demonstrate that when a person acts on a homosexual orientation, it’s harmful? In fact, most studies show that homosexual people, who enter into loving, permanent relationships with other people, are happier and more productive. So, that’s where the bind is, because the teaching doesn’t make sense,” says Nickoloff.

Bishops Say ‘No’

you’re not a mistake. You’re not the enemy.” James B. Nickoloff, a Catholic theologian and a fellow at Santa Clara University, says that the Catholic Church’s view of homosexuality is that gay people are afflicted with a grave disorder. “The official teachings see it as something which is not the responsibility of the person who has it. They shouldn’t be blamed for it, like you shouldn’t blame an alcoholic for being an alcoholic,” says Nickoloff. “If the person acts on their condition of being an alcoholic, in other words, if they go to a bar and drink, then the outcome of that is always going to be damaging to the person themselves, to the people around them and to society. Because, they’re going to get into their car, they are going to be drunk and they are going to kill somebody. That’s how the church sees homosexuality.” Last May, Nickoloff published a paper titled “Intrinsically Disordered: Gay People and the Holiness of the Church,” while serving as a resident professor at the Santa Clara University Religious Studies Department. A devout Catholic, Nickoloff is also a self-affirming gay man who is legally married in the state of

One of the broad goals the USCCB has set for itself for 2010 is the “defense of marriage effort,” which will be a top item for discussion at its general assembly this week. The development of “Marriage: Love and Life in the Divine Plan” is part of a broader initiative to promote and strengthen marriage in an era where more than half of heterosexual marriages are destined to fail. A draft of the statement was leaked to the web last month. The official document states that same sex unions are one of the most troubling developments in contemporary culture. “[Same sex marriage] harms both the intrinsic dignity of every human person and the common good of society,” reads the draft statement, which will be debated and voted on by the bishops this week. “The legal recognition of same-sex unions poses a multifaceted threat to the very fabric of society, striking at the source from which society and culture come and which they are meant to serve.” The statement continues by asserting that same-sex marriage has nothing to do with civil rights. “Today, advocacy for the legal recognition of various same sex relationships is often equated with nondiscrimination, fairness, equality and civil rights. However, it is not unjust to oppose legal recognition of same-sex unions, because marriage and same-sex unions are essentially different realities. The denial of the social and legal status of marriage to forms of cohabitation that are not and cannot be marital is not opposed to justice; on the contrary, justice requires it.” When voters in Maine revoked their state law allowing same-sex marriage on Nov. 3, the USCCB immediately released a letter applauding the repeal, an effort the church strongly supported. “Protecting marriage between a man and a woman has nothing to do with denying basic rights to anyone, though it is often framed in such terms,” said Louisville Archbishop Joseph E. Kurtz 20

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in the Nov. 4 statement. After praising Maine’s voters for denying gay men and women the right to marry, he went on to underscore the fact that the church “stands for the basic rights of all people, including homosexual persons” and “decries any unjust discrimination against persons who experience same-sex attraction.” Many gay Catholics believe that the reason that this contradiction in the church exists is due to a lack of communication. There is a huge moat between those laying down the religious law—the bishops and the Vatican—and the realities of contemporary culture that parish priests face every day. “I think the bishops are seriously separated from the culture in general, and gay and lesbian people in particular,” Nickoloff says. “Who are they listening to? Where are they getting their information? In the Catholic Church, there are no women writing documents, and there are no openly gay people writing documents either. So, that’s one of the reasons why the bishops are so distant. They are sort of making it harder and harder, in recent years, for themselves to hear the stories of real gay people.” Bill Welch, a longtime member of the Emmaus Community and the former head of the San Jose chapter of DignityUSA, the national organization for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender Catholics, says that many in the local gay Catholic community are not looking forward to the outcome of this week’s vote. “People are getting tired of the words ‘intrinsically evil’ and ‘objectively disordered.’ They are saying, ‘I don’t want to hear that anymore. Throw that out. Get rid of it.’ “When they were doing Prop. 8, nobody interviewed any gay or lesbian Catholics, so nobody had any idea of where and what position these people are coming from. The same with this pastoral letter.”

Catholics by Choice The front page of the weekly bulletin at St. Julie Billiart says “All Are Welcome,” specifically pointing out that it is a community of “people who are straight, gay and lesbian.” It is a rare statement for a Catholic parish bulletin, written by Pedigo, the church’s pastor. Unlike many who enter the priesthood, Pedigo did not grow up Roman Catholic. He says, half-joking, that’s why he is not saddled with traditional Catholic guilt. Pedigo was raised in Pacifica, the son of a Buddhist mother of Japanese decent who grew up in the sugar cane plantation camps of Hawaii. His father is a Caucasian Protestant and a former union organizer. “I really didn’t have those shame issues,” Pedigo says. “My perceptions of God came from a more Asian perspective, that God

exists for unity and love. It’s a different way of dealing with it that’s not so much the punishment piece.” Though his family was not Catholic, Pedigo says he had a desire to attend church from a young age. He says he enjoyed the music, as well as the free donuts. He says he became aware of his spiritual side while attending college in the late 1970s, majoring in music and performance at San Francisco State University. While he focused on mastering the clarinet, he also became involved with political and social justice issues. “It was at that point that I started looking into this integration of poetry, music, spirituality and political activism. I just saw all of those pieces coming together, and always had the reference point of the Catholic church,” he says. Pedigo insists that his coming of age in San Francisco was like any other young adult. “I went on dates, I had fun. I was a music major, so I’d go out with a lot of people partying and stuff like that,” he recalls. “I guess the difference was that there was a part of me that is just like anybody else, but there was also a part of me that is more introspective. That’s the part that began to dominate my life. When everybody around me was pushing the limits and pushing the envelope in terms of the excesses of the 1970s and ’80s, I actually did the opposite.” It was after attending graduate school for his master’s in music education at Indiana University, Bloomington, that Pedigo decided to start seriously exploring theology. “Everything began to come together, so my whole life has been a series of integrating various strands and weaving them into one common thread of social change,” he says. “When converting, I had the question ‘Should I or shouldn’t I pursue this and live it as a full-time job.’ The answer was yeah, this is really what I want to do. It makes me feel that I’m doing the right thing. It feels natural to me.” However, while exploring the possibility of converting to Catholicism, he learned fast that the norms that he grew up with in the liberal Bay Area and the world of academia did not fly in the Roman Catholic hierarchy. A self-described “bad seminarian,” Pedigo says he frequently clashed with his superiors after entering St. Patrick’s Seminary in Menlo Park in 1984. He later earned his Licentiate in Sacred Theology from the Jesuit School of Theology in Berkeley. “I’m a better priest then I was a seminarian,” he says. “I talked way too much and I said too many controversial things. Seminarians are supposed to be quiet and complacent, and I tended to have opinions, and they weren’t always received well. My thought was, I want them to know and let them see what they


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are ordaining.” In addition to friction at the seminary, he faced opposition at home. When he finally made the decision to join the priesthood, Pedigo says, his parents practically disowned him because they viewed the Roman Catholic Church as a self-serving institution. “My parents were very upset,” he says. “They were really set on having grandkids, my mother especially, and that just wasn’t part of the gig. “In one of her fits of consternation, we were sitting eating, and my father was in the next room watching TV. She stopped eating and we looked at each other and she said, ‘You mean to tell me that you’re going to listen to some man 10,000 miles away from here, and you don’t even listen to the man in the next room?” Pedigo’s parents were not present at his ordainment ceremony in 1991. He says his mother and father eventually came to terms with his chosen lifestyle when he started taking more of an activist role at his first parish, St. Catherine of Alexandria in Morgan Hill. That’s also where he received his first hate mail, after he began getting involved in farm rights in South County.

Ask and Tell Though it is a small, 1,000-household suburban church, St. Julie Billiart Parish has a substantial number of gay and lesbian parishioners, dating back to its start in the mid-1970s. St. Julie’s founder, Rev. Matthew Sullivan, and second pastor Rev. Richard Fry, were both strong believers in the liberal reforms of Pope John XXIII’s Vatican II. Pedigo joined St. Julie’s community in July 2001, after Fry retired. He says it was already a liberal-leaning Catholic community when he became pastor, and that it was important for him to establish strong involvement and leadership within the lay ministry and staff. With the help of Pedigo, St. Julie’s also formed a pastoral council that came to consensus early on that they wanted to make a point by addressing and acknowledging all types of people who called St. Julie’s their parish. “There are gay and lesbian people in every Catholic parish,” Pedigo says. “Even in the most conservative parishes there are gay and lesbian parishioners present. Certainly the parents and friends of gay and lesbian 22

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persons are in the pews at any time. “Our thing is we simply acknowledge the fact that they are there. So it’s not like we’re a dysfunctional family where there is this pink elephant in the room and nobody’s talking about the pink elephant.” Pedigo said that as he started to notice the growing LGBT Catholic community that was coming to St. Julie’s, he decided to consult the established gay Catholic community at the Most Holy Redeemer Catholic Church in San Francisco’s Castro District. “I said, ‘Look, I’m a server in San Jose, and I have all these gay and lesbian people coming for baptism and wanting their babies to be baptized and raising their kids and their families Catholic. And we’ve got kids in the youth group who are sexual.’ I asked, ‘What do you guys do about this? What have you done?’” “They said that your primary concern is to be open to them and hear their stories and minister to them just as you would anybody else, and not to see it as a special side ministry, but to see it as part and parcel to parish life.” From that time forward, Pedigo has freely acknowledged and supported the gay and lesbian Catholics who flock to St. Julie’s. He publicly opposed Prop. 8, going so far as to post video interviews with gay Catholic families on his blog (www.frjonblog.org). Pedigo says that when dealing with his gay parishioners, and especially with the teen group, he tries to emphasize that the process of coming out is not a big deal. “With the kids, if you take away the elements of fear and shame, then they can be in a place to make a better psychological decision to choose a relationship that’s healthy, that’s not exploitive, that’s deep and meaningful, rather then just sex,” he says. “Then, your parishioner is a much healthier individual that will be able to exercise intelligent choices.” Pedigo makes it very clear that it is not his or St. Julie’s agenda to stand up and challenge the official teaching of the Catholic Church, but that his flock is his first priority. “What we do here is consistent with the history of the Diocese of San Jose,” he says. “They are very well aware of what we are doing, in terms of our welcoming and openness. “We recognize that the church that we’re a part of does not recognize aspects of the gay and lesbian or transgender experience, including ordination and marriage. But LGBT members and their families are still identifying with the Catholic Church.” Bob Rucker, a St. Julie’s parishioner and a founding member of the pastoral council who is leading the church’s outreach effort to the LGBT Catholic community, explains why he thinks Pedigo is such a great leader. “He’s one of those rare finds who

combine a wonderful, inviting, charismatic personality with an incredible intelligence. I’ve never known a Catholic priest who was able to inspire more and get more out of college kids, high school kids and grammar school kids then Jon Pedigo. He just connects with them. He also has the ability to use the collar effectively with those of us over the age of 30 or 40 or 50, who think we know it all. “He has a wonderful calming effect that’s based on intellect and respect for people. He’s very clear that he is very loyal to the church, but he takes a pragmatic view. Why not help people find a way to deal with what they are facing? Instead of saying, ‘Well, just deny that part of you, just don’t do it, live this way and you will be saved.’”

The Diocese of San Jose has long been one of the most gay-friendly Roman Catholic ecclesiastical territories in the United States. Few people know this, and many in the local Catholic community would like it stay that way. Pedigo says that, over the years, the hardest thing about being a priest for him has been working within the Roman Catholic Church’s institutional limitations. “You have this thousands-of-yearsold institution, with its hierarchy and institutional culture,” he says. “And then you have the demands of real life. Sometimes, the institution’s time frame is not adequate to deal with the realities that are put in front of you. I tend to identify with what’s in front of me, because that’s my job, to be in the field, in the mix. “When you’re listening to people’s pain, a lot of that is not going to be in line with what somebody in a higher office with a pointy hat says. My job is not to be a PR


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 COVER STORY

person for the church. My job is to guide my flock. “It’s about truly raising the dead. If somebody’s spirit has been slaughtered, it doesn’t matter the person’s lifestyle or his or her life choices or what things have happened in their life. If you’re a person who’s really listening, you’ll go to deal with that pain. You’ll work with it to move it towards a level of healing, instead of saying, ‘Oh well, I have a ready-made answer from the institution that’s going to fit you just perfectly.’ That just doesn’t work.”

Beyond Tolerance San Jose Bishop Patrick Joseph McGrath was one of the first Catholic Church leaders in the country to establish a Pastoral Resource Committee to support LGBT-identifying Catholics. Information and resources for gay and lesbian Catholics are freely displayed on the San Jose Diocese website. Even the Diocese of San Francisco, which has one of the largest gay and lesbian populations in the nation, has yet to establish a Diocesan-sanctioned ministry to the LGBT community. McGrath became bishop of San Jose in 1998, and has spoken many times with leaders of the LGBT Catholic community. In 2005, the diocese went so far as to host the 12th annual conference of the National Association of Catholic Diocesan Lesbian and Gay Ministries at the downtown San Jose Hilton Hotel. The bishop was the opening session speaker at the event, which included three days of workshops, worship and networking. And yet the diocese does not publicly speak to the gay and lesbian Catholic community about its stance or ministry. McGrath declined to be interviewed or give any comment for this story. Bob Rucker says that he was personally invited to attended an LGBT Catholic community outreach meeting organized by Bishop McGrath last June. He said that 40-some members of the local clergy leadership were also present. “I saw a very positive example there of how the leadership of the Catholic diocese, the priests, were being schooled on the humanitarian angle on this outreach,” Rucker says. “But, I have to be fair. I also noticed that though there were a good number of priests there who wanted to bring this up and figure out a way to approach it, there were also priests who were not very attentive, who obviously seemed put off by the notion of ruffling the feathers. “I have to give the bishop credit, he articulates beautifully, eloquently, lovingly, on what Catholic priests should be doing as leaders of their parishes,” he says. “My only problem with him is the same problem we have with our president of the United States. It’s wonderful to speak eloquently, but what exactly are you doing to push that

agenda through as leader of a diocese?” Bob Welch, who has been involved in the gay Catholic community in the South Bay since the late 1970s, says that Dignity San Jose used to have an active outreach in the late ’80s and early ’90s that included staffing a booth at the San Jose Gay Pride Festival. The DignityUSA San Jose chapter dissolved about four years ago. For the latter part of the group’s existence, there was a large amount of conflict about how visible they should be. Welch says many were scared that if they were too upfront about their outreach, they would be shut down. He says they had multiple incidents where conservative Catholics came to their events with recorders, later using them to write protests to newspapers and the Vatican. Still, he says, priests and parishioners who minister at and attend the St. Martin of Tours mass are fearful of retaliation. “There are a number of people here who are taking an underground position,” he says. “We do have people, and a lot of priests, who are very anxious about their jobs.”

[23]

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Our Church Too On Oct. 19, St. Julie’s Parish pastoral council met to discuss the establishment of an LGBT outreach effort. Rucker led the meeting. He presented a 10-page document to the committee, outlining the goals of the new ministry as well as clarifications of diocesan and church policy regarding ministry to homosexuals. He says the pastoral council’s reception was very positive. “We just want to step up and do more, so we are fully welcomed as human beings with family, not just as gay people,” he says. Rucker believes that taking a more public approach is essential, because even at St. Julie’s there is an air of holding back. “I just met a couple two days ago at Father Jon’s 11:30am mass. Two guys together is always kind of an indicator. I walked up to those guys and said, ‘Hey, how are you? My name is Bob, I’m the lector today at church. My partner’s name is Ben.” “Their eyes lit up. They begin to tell me, ‘Yeah, we got married last year, and we have a family, and we like coming here. Wow, you actually just told us here in church,’ and I said, ‘Yeah, it’s confession of the truth. Isn’t it cool?’ “We have to convince the church that confession of the truth won’t hurt the priests, or the institution, or the parishioners.” “Do I come into the church yelling to everybody ‘I’m gay, I’m gay, I’m gaaaay!’ No, I don’t, but I don’t miss an opportunity to talk about my family, including my partner. I’m not going to dishonor him by not talking about him. “Gay and lesbian people have been told for so long, ‘Drop the pronouns, don’t talk about it in church and you’ll be welcome.’ 24

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[27]


[28] STYLE

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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REEZY EXCURSION, one of the biggest streetwear brands to come out of San Jose ever, started with a dream. “I literally had a real dream about selling T-shirts made out of solid gold,” says GN6C B6CI:, the co-owner of the San Jose–based apparel brand. “I woke up and said, ‘You know what? I want to make T-shirts.’” Mante met his business partner, 8=G>HI>6C È;A>EÉ A>AA:A6C9, while majoring in marketing at San Diego State University. Both in their mid-20s and hailing from the Bay Area, they moved back to NorCal in 2007 and launched the clothing with an $800 investment. Mante drew up their first company logos in Microsoft Paint, Lilleland bought a copy of Adobe Illustrator FRESH PRINCES!!Csff{z!Fydvstjpo!dp.pxofst!! for Dummies and they stored Szbo!Nbouf!)sjhiu*!boe!Disjtujbo!ÕGmjqÖ!Mjmmfmboe!! boxes of T-shirts in their cars. xjui!Vnbmj-!MjmmfmboeÖt!qfu!qju!cvmm/ After dropping their first real line last year, the duo decided to crash the 2008 MAGIC’s S.L.A.T.E. Trade Show, the largest progressive fashion trade show in North America. Trying to get the word out about their brand, the two carried their merchandise around in backpacks and handed out catalogs of their wares around the convention floor and at industry parties. “We were total outsiders, total strangers. It’s like we were not invited to the prom. Me and Christian were the guys out of San Jose that no one knew,” says Mante. “So finally, we went to the bar, got a few shots in us and said, ‘Lets do this!’” One year and tons of hustling later, Breezy Excursion has become a major brand on the Bay Area urban wear scene. The key to their success is that they make screen-printed urban wear that hits on untapped elements of nostalgia but without being cheesy. Their clothing aims to be an in-joke for their 18-to-25-year-old male customer base, often using themes from early-’90s pop culture and TV. For example, their popular Bel Air Collection is inspired by the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. But, you won’t find Will Smith’s face on the front of their shirts. “We really try to dissect the theme and make it very clean. Even something as little as the hat we made, we wanted to theme that off of the blazer in the show,” says Lilleland. “So, our Carlton shirt, it’s all bow ties because the joke was he had different bow ties for every day. And the Bel Air Academy shirt, we illustrated a shield similar to it. Then with the Grey Poupon shirt, it’s a nostalgic memory from a commercial, but we twisted it. We have a big hand like Uncle Phil’s hand and we had the butler’s hand, which is Geoffrey, passing the Grey Poupon to him,” says Mante. Their clever, humorous designs have made the company boom in the middle of an otherwise tough economy. “We’ve been growing like crazy lately. The boxes [in our warehouse] are a little empty right now because we’ve been filling so many orders with the holidays coming. But, that’s a great problem,” says Mante. Breezy Excursion now has 40-plus accounts in the United States, Japan and Europe. They are sold at street-wear boutiques all around the Bay Area, including 6G>HID8G6IH on Jackson Street in San Jose and LDG@B:CH$76A6C8: at the Eastridge Mall. Mante and Lilleland say they knew they had really made it this past August when Breezy Excursion was invited to have its very own booth at S.L.A.T.E. in Las Vegas. “We started with humble beginnings, with just four T-shirts and a crew-neck sweater. And this season, we came out with almost 40 new designs,” says Mante. “We were like ‘Now, we’re the guys invited to the prom.’ We were the only brand out of San Jose to be in the S.L.A.T.E. trade show. It meant a lot, and it made us solidify all the hard work all the pain and tears and growing pains,” says Mante. Jessica Fromm BREEZY EXCURSION will release a limited edition City of San Jose Seal T-shirt at the Unification of the San Jose Nation Party for Charity on Saturday (Nov. 21) at Agenda Lounge at 399 S. First St., San Jose. Tickets are $10 at the door with proceeds going to the ASI Children’s Art Program.


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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 MENU

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[29]

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MAGINE, if you will, a pyramid. The pyramid represents Silicon Valley’s dining scene. The broad base symbolizes all the great ethnic restaurants in Silicon Valley, the myriad of Indian, Vietnamese, Chinese, Korean, Japanese and Mexican places that make the valley’s food scene so distinctive and diverse. At the apex of the pyramid sit the few ďŹ ne dining restaurants, outstanding destination restaurants like the Plumed Horse, Manresa, Marche, Kaygetsu and Le Papillon. In the middle, you would expect to ďŹ nd an array of midpriced restaurants, and indeed there are a great many places that ďŹ t that description, but there are precious few worth mentioning. As a rule, most are mediocre, predictable and boring. As such, there is a great gap in the structure. What do you call a pyramid with a hole in the middle? I don’t know, but whatever it is, that’s what we’ve got in Silicon Valley. Where are the dependable neighborhood cafes and bistros, friendly, welcoming places like Liberty CafĂŠ and the Slow Club in San Francisco or the Bonny Doon Cellar Door CafĂŠ in Santa Cruz or Dopo and Wood Tavern in Oakland,

places that are affordable enough to go during the week and casual enough for jeans, but where the food is ambitious, expertly prepared and sometimes surprising? Where do you go for that in Silicon Valley? I’ll have to get back to you. In an effort to ďŹ ll in this gaping hole, I went to CafĂŠ Torre in Cupertino. While Cupertino has some good regional Chinese restaurants, the top-of-the line Alexander’s Steakhouse and a few other standout restaurants, the city doesn’t really have much going on foodwise. CafĂŠ Torre is something of an anomaly, an intimate Mediterranean restaurant tucked into a generic minimall. The “cafeâ€? half of the restaurant’s sign outside is burned out, which makes it hard to ďŹ nd it at night. And just because Cupertino is home to Apple, don’t rely on your iPhone to guide you there. On one of my visits, my dining companion’s phone seemed to be steering him to an empty lot somewhere. But once inside the narrow restaurant, you discover an island of calm and urbane sophistication. The blond-wood oors, angular wine bar and cozy back room make it feel like a big-city hideout. CafĂŠ Torre’s

strength is probably its service. You won’t ďŹ nd any college students or neophyte waiters here. The restaurant is staffed by serious professionals who don’t introduce themselves by name or scribble smiley faces on the bill, but who know their trade well and move about the place with an easy authority. That alone makes CafĂŠ Torre special. But it’s the food that matters most, and CafĂŠ Torre hits the mark. Except when it doesn’t. The menu reads like a list of classic of ItalianAmerican and Mediterranean food—pastas, roasted ďŹ sh, grilled meats and a handful of starters and salads. Over the course of three visits, my best experiences were at lunch. The restaurant is crowded at lunch with what look to be and sound like white-collar types from Apple and other corporations nearby. I still have fond memories of the roastedlamb sandwich ($8). Served on light and crusty rosemary focaccia, the juicy lamb is sliced thin and paired with caramelized onions. Simple and delicious. The same goes for the steamed clams with linguiça in a shallotand-thyme-infused white-wine broth ($13). It’s great mopped up

with hunks of the crusty bread that comes with it. The salads are quite good because of the sparing application of vinaigrette. The baby-arugula salad with tangy shaved ďŹ ore sardo cheese and prosciutto ($7) was my favorite, but the warm spinach salad with garlic and pancetta dressing, barely wilted and with a refreshing lemon quality to the dressing, was a standout, too. The restaurant does clams well. In addition to the aforementioned steamed clams, the clean and robust avors of the linguine with clams, tomatoes, garlic and oregano ($16) won me over with its hearty simplicity. I expected the same from the spaghetti puttanesca ($12). The anchovy, garlic, capers, olive and tomato pasta was ďŹ ne but didn’t rise above what I could make from the contents of my refrigerator. Dinner is mostly strong, too. Fried calamari appetizers are ubiquitous, but well rendered here ($9), with a greaseless breading and a rich remoulade sauce for dipping. Less appealing was the cold slab of housemade duck pâtĂŠ ($13). It might have been better if it wasn’t pulled right from the refrigerator, but then the (&


[30]

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 MENU

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less-than-creamy, coarse texture would hold it back, too. I loved the lasagna ($15), a classic take on a classic. Rather than being buried in a layer of molten cheese, the top of the dish was lightly crisped in the oven with minimal cheese. The meat sauce carried a delicate and sweet undertone (carrots?), and the beautiful, deep-red tomato sauce was deeply reduced and offered sweet and savory avors that had me spooning up the last bites. The double-cut pork chop ($22) was as fat and juicy as they come and expertly caramelized. The brandy apricot sauce was a good foil for the savory-rich pork, but the Brussels sprouts on the side were undercooked. Penne classico ($14), made with garlic sausage, tomatoes, herbs and parmesan, was ďŹ ne, but like the spaghetti puttanesca, it’s another dish you could easily make just as well yourself. A good, midtier restaurant doesn’t have to offer inventive, trendy dishes, but if it’s going to lead with the classics of Italian-American food, it should be better than what you can make on your own. CafĂŠ Torre has an accessible if fairly mainstream wine list that offers several local wines worth seeking out, such as the Hunter Hill Vineyard Cabernet Sauvignon and Bargetto Winery’s chardonnay. Desserts ranged from pretty good to trainwreck. The silken-chocolate torte ($6.75) delivered a satisfying hit of chocolate with a rich and nutty crust. The desultory rhubarb shortcake ($6.75), however, is my pick for the worst dessert of 2009. The rhubarb was cooked for so long that the pleasing wine-red color of the vegetable had been leached out into a pale pink and beige and had the structure of overcooked baby food. Rhubarb’s pleasantly tart, strawberrylike avor had been reduced to a sour, sticky sweet mass. The pear tart ($7.50) was almost as bad. The crudely formed crust was pale and doughy and needed more time in the oven. The pears were mealy and less than sweet and lacked any caramelization that would have elevated them from simply oven-heated fruit. When I informed our waiter about the desserts, he took one look at the shortcake and agreed it was no good, but he defended the tart and gamely picked up a fork and sampled it himself and pronounced it just ďŹ ne. We disagreed, but I appreciated his willingness to engage me on the subject. While he graciously took the shortcake off the bill, he pushed back on the pear tart, informing me a couple sitting nearby really liked it. And? Was I expected to like it because other people did? I sent it back. CafĂŠ Torre takes a few steps toward plugging the hole in the midsection of Silicon Valley’s restaurant scene, but the restaurant—and the region at large—has yet to realize its potential.

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[31]


[32] DINING GUIDE

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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Y NOW, we all know that the H6CI6 8GJO BDJCI6>CH are home to dozens of small artisanal wineries. And many have heard that on certain weekends the wineries host big events called Passport days. But some folks still aren’t quite sure what this Passport program is all about. So let’s get started. Four times a year (the third Saturdays of January, April, July and November), members SOUTHERN HOSPITALITY!!Sjdibse! of the H6CI6 8GJO BDJCI6>CH L>C:<GDL:GH Bmgbsp-!xiptf!Bmgbsp!Gbnjmz!Wjofzbset!jt! 6HHD8>6I>DC open their tasting rooms and mpdbufe!bu!uif!tpvuifso!foe!pg!uif!Tboub!Dsv{! wineries to the public. Here’s why that matters: Npvoubjot!xjofhspxjoh!sfhjpo-!jt!qsfqbsjoh! gps!uif!potmbvhiu!pg!cpo!wjwbout/ Many of these wineries aren’t open to the public most of the year, and these open house days allow wine lovers to visit the wineries, meet eccentric winemakers, tour the cellars and sample and purchase rare, limited and new varietals created by our local vintners. The Passport concept means that you purchase a miniature touring “passportâ€? for $40 at any one of the participating wineries, and that gets you in to each and every winery on the tour. These events are out-and-out fun and tend to turn into parties, with winemakers offering ďŹ nger foods and ambience-heightening live music. Wine association operations manager H=6CCDC ;ANCC has been doing these events for nine years now, and she’s still loving it. “What makes Passport unique is that it allows guests the opportunity to visit wineries that aren’t typically open to the public at other times,â€? says Flynn, who believes that the Santa Cruz winery Passport is distinctive because “you are meeting the winemaker and really getting a hands-on experience.â€? Passport day has grown through the years. “When I ďŹ rst started here,â€? Flynn told me, “we had just over 20 wineries participating. Now we have just over 50.â€? 7:6JG:<6G9 K>C:N6G9H, which recently took up residence in the former Bonny Doon tasting room site, is one of the day’s few North Coast destinations. “We have Blackboard Catering throwing down some mean grinds,â€? says GN6C 7:6JG:<6G9, adding that there’s “a good chance we’ll be doing draft horse tours of the vineyard.â€? Fingers crossed! “It’s a nice way to get new people into the winery that have not been here before,â€? says G>8=6G9 6A;6GD, who has lined up a local jewelry artist and pianist Oak Joe Haselton to entertain visitors at his Corralitos winery. Alfaro calls the event a kick-off for the holiday party season; people come in and stock up for holiday parties. ?:;; :B:GN, winemaker at the legendary Santa Cruz Mountain Vineyard, once again welcomes the Passport-holding public to the new Ingalls Street complex, where he and fellow Surf City vintners (including newcomer =>AA8G:HI I:GG68:! E:A>86C G6C8=! HDC:H 8:AA6GH and K>CD I67>) will be pouring new releases. “We’ll almost certainly pour our brand-new 2007 grenache from 100-year-old McDowell Valley grapes,â€? says Emery. On the upper slopes of the Santa Cruz Mountains, Vine Hill winegrower C>8@ <J:GG:GD anticipates his second year of welcoming the public to his gorgeous mountain setting. This time, as a special treat to those who make the trek, Guerrero and his team will be pouring an award-winning 2005 Cumbre Raffaelli library pinot noir. As if we needed any more encouragement. Christina Waters

SANTA CRUZ MOUNTAIN WINERY ASSOCIATION PASSPORT PROGRAM is Saturday (Nov. 21), 11am–5pm. Passes are $40, available at www.scmwa.com, all participating wineries or by calling 831.685.8463.

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NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 DINING GUIDE

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AVID CHANG hates the Bay Area. We all know that, right? C’mon, Fig-gate and everything? He’s been tried and convicted in the media of crimes against “local and organic, the NorCal code of culinary conduct. The verdict: He’s out to ruin our reputation, plain and simple. What more is there to say? It’s funny, when I ďŹ rst heard what Chang had said—the bit, in case you somehow missed this, about “fuckin’ every restaurant in San Francisco is just serving ďŹ gs on a plate . . . do something with your foodâ€?—I knew two things. One, he said it onstage with Anthony Bourdain, which means he was required to say something as outrageous as possible. Have you ever seen Bourdain onstage? The man makes his living saying crazy shit. His very presence forces everyone around him to try to be crazy, too. And yet, he’s the only one who ever gets away with it. That same night, Bourdain called Alice Waters “Pol Pot in a muumuu,â€? but it’s Chang’s dinky ďŹ g comment that takes the heat, getting him disinvited from a signing of his new book Momofuku for the Bay Area’s Asia Society? That’s sort of hilarious. Second, I knew something had been taken out of context. It’s almost always the case when someone’s entire conversation on any topic has been boiled down to one sentence. But when the hurt-feeling-a-thon began over Fig-gate, there was no stopping it. Luckily, Kepler’s bookstore in Menlo Park had Chang in for an event, allowing South Bay foodies to size up Chang’s post-game analysis. Of course, he got asked about Fig-gate, to which he answered, “I got myself into a big media mess.â€? But he didn’t back off his comments, suggesting Bay Area cuisine is neither as “progressiveâ€? or “diverseâ€? as it should be considering the talent and cultural cross-pollination here. But it was the next question that was more illuminating: are there any cities that are measuring up to what they should be achieving? His answer: San Sebastian, Spain. And that’s it. So basically, there’s not a single city in the United States—not his native New York, not Los Angeles, not anywhere in the Northwest, Southwest or entire East Coast that satisďŹ es him. So it’s really not a Bay Area thing, is it? Listening to his talk, it was clear that it’s much more of a David Chang thing: the guy is driven to change the culinary world, almost to a fault. He doesn’t trust success, and jokes that the two Michelin stars awarded to his restaurant Ko were “the worst thing that ever happened to me.â€? He can be moved to completely reinvent his restaurants almost on a whim, and he even admits to sabotaging them with bizarre approaches just because—though he himself didn’t use this word—what they were doing wasn’t revolutionary enough for him. The guy wants the whole world to be on the culinary edge, and he isn’t scared to slip off of it. Instead of reacting like a bunch of crybabies, the Bay Area food world could rise to the challenge put out by chefs as ambitious as Chang. Another thing that was clear at Chang’s Kepler’s talk was that he hasn’t familiarized himself nearly well enough with South Bay food. But he has nothing but the utmost respect for David Kinch, who introduced him. He said he’d never open a restaurant in Los Gatos, because Kinch “could cook circles around me.â€? He even ended by saying that Kinch does nothing less than keep food in America relevant. I’m sorry, but Fig-gate or no, that could only be said by someone who does understand what’s exciting and innovative about Bay Area cuisine. Steve Palopoli

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[39]


[40] CCALENDAR ALENDAR

NOVEMBER N O V E M B E R 18-24, 1 8 - 2 4 , 2009 2 0 0 9 M E T R O S I L I C O N VVAA L L E Y

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Ballet B allet San San Jose Jose

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Mountain Charley’s Charley ’s

255 Almaden Almaden Blvd, Blvd, San San Jose Jo ose

N.. S Santa Los Gatos 15 N anta Cruz Cruz Ave, Ave, L os Gato s

408.288.2800

408.395.8880 408.395 .8880

Thu-Fri Sat Thu-F ri – 8pm, S at – 1:30 0 and 8pm, S Sun – 1:30pm 1 30

free Thu – 9pm; fr ee

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Save the Save the Scene Scene Benefit B enefit S Show how Saratoga S aratoga Rec Rec Center Center 119655 9655 Allendale Alle endale Ave, Ave, Saratoga Saratoga 408.868.1272 408 868 11272 408.868.1 Fri F ri – 6pm; 6pm; $10 $10

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DeAnza Blvd, Cupertino upertino 11087 0 7D 08 eAnza Blv d, C

44 S. S. Almaden Almaden Ave, Ave, San San Jose Jose

408.252.7262 40 08.252.7262

408.29.BLANK 408.29 .BLANK

Fri free F ri – 9pm; fr ee

Fri $10 F ri – 9pm; $1 0

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Lisa Lampanelli

Laurence Juber

Wednesday 13

Fox Theatre

Little Fox Theatre

VooDoo Lounge

2209 Broadway, Redwood City

2209 Broadway, Redwood City

14 S. Second St, San Jose

650.369.4119

650.369.4119

408.286.8636

Sat – 7pm; $42.75

Sun – 7pm; $18/$20

Wed – 7:30pm; $10

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[42]

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 ARTS

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[43]

METROGUIDE

Gjmn ‘Precious’ smothers sensationalism in some great acting_48

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Playwright Philip Grecian talks about adapting beloved ‘A Christmas Story’ for the stage By Richard von Busack

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ING CROSBY could have put it all in a Christmas song: the rifle that’ll shoot your eye out, the Nehi lamp and the clinker-filled coalscuttle. Bob Clark’s 1983 film of A Christmas Story, through 24-hour screenings on cable, has become essential to the holiday. The stage adaptation at San Jose Repertory Theatre, which starts previews this week, takes different angles on Jean Shepherd’s comedic memoir, with Rep stalwart Dan Hiatt as the adult Ralphie. Says director Chris Smith, “We literally change the tones and temperature. Some parts are way overblown, but there’s an undertone of all the tensions parents have in bringing up a kid. These might be better expressed in the play than the movie, with living breathing human beings.” Smith adds, “The play is about the tensions that last a couple of days, broken through an elegant and gracious gesture. The whole world tips from order to disorder and back again. And it’s imagined from a child’s point of view, because children magnify everything.”

Philip Grecian is the adaptor of this holiday favorite. Every winter, some 100 theatrical companies stage his play version, from little theaters to equity. From Kansas, Grecian says, “The adaptation problem was at first of taking a heavily narrated film and turning it into a play. Narration is a no-no onstage. This story is a memory play told by Ralphie as a grownup. We see him from the beginning. He enters—invisible to everyone onstage. Sometimes, he joins in on the action. He plays a Christmas-tree salesman, for instance. And when Ralphie is reading the Red Ryder ad, the older Ralphie puts on a cowboy hat and reads the advertisement as a grownup cowboy.” Shepherd was a radio storyteller before he became published as an essayist in the golden age of Playboy. Grecian used to read the Shepherd stories aloud from the magazine: “My children were excited when Playboy arrived in the mail because they knew there might be a Shepherd story in it. One Christmas, I was looking for a children’s movie at a theater. I saw this movie I knew nothing about, except that it was

rated for children. When the title card read ‘A film by Jean Shepherd,’ my daughter leaned in and whispered, ‘Is it our Jean Shepherd?’ It was a sleeper of a film; the theater wasn’t very full.” Grecian continues, “Shep owned the copyright, Turner owned the film. Turner was the difficult part. But Shep was a dream. I sent the play to Shep, he approved of it. And then Shep died. He didn’t get to read the final version and didn’t get to see it onstage. That particular year, it seemed like we were kind of late in the game. It was September, and we thought we probably won’t get any takers. Immediately, 20 some theaters canceled what they were doing [in order] to stage it.” Grecian recalls with pleasure seeing the play staged in San Jose. “They very were kind to me, and I loved that Christmas display in the park. Every winter, I get to see a few productions of the play; the companies who do it are almost families themselves. Why is A Christmas Story a perennial? The playwright explains, “Because it’s about your past Christmas as much as it is Shep’s.

It’s interesting: the story seems to take place sometimes in the 1930s, sometimes in the 1950s. Some details are from the 1940s, though World War II is out of the picture. But in fact, Shep was actually Ralphie’s age in the 1920s. A Christmas Story takes place in everyone’s past. On the play I wrote that it takes place in 1938, because people staging a play have to know what the era is. I should have written “It takes place in your childhood.” “It’s almost a tragedy,” Grecian finishes. “Shep had a very jaundiced view of Christmas, and much of that comes through in the movie. The moral of the story is, you want this one thing and nobody will give it to you. I don’t think Shep was ever very happy about Christmas, but he was such a great storyteller that he made people happy. Comedy and tragedy are essentially to sides of the same coin, and tragedy becomes comedy in time.” A CHRISTMAS STORY, a San Jose Rep production, previews Nov. 21–22, 24–25 and opens Nov. 27 at the Rep, 101 Paseo de San Antonio, San Jose. Tickets are $45-¢69. (408.367.7255)


[44] STAGE/ART/LIT

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 STAGE/ART/LIT

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Classical Moves

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OR its November presentation, the H6C ?DH: 8=6B7:G BJH>8 HD8>:IN welcomes the 6B:GC:I HIG>C< FJ6GI:I all the way from Florida International University to town. Violinists Misha Vitenson and Marcia Littley de Arias, violist Michael Klotz and cellist Javiet Arias will perform Haydn’s Sunrise Quartet, Mendelssohn’s Quartet in E Minor and Tchaikovsky’s Quartet no. 1 (Accordion). Sunday (Nov. 22) at 7pm; Le Petit Trianon, 72 N. Fifth St., San Jose; $25–$40; 408.286.5111. The HDJI= 76N <J>I6G HD8>:IN hosts renowned classical guitarist 696B 9:A BDCI:, who is also noted for his skill in the flamenco style. In addition to performing, del Monte has also been composing flamenco-flavored pieces. Saturday (Nov. 21) at 8pm; Le Petit Trianon, 72 N. Fifth St., San Jose; $15–$25; 408.292.0704. Coming up for breath after its extensive Prokofiev Project, HI6C;DG9 A>K:AN 6GIH offers a concert by the 8DCIG6HIH FJ6GI:I. This clarinet, violin, cello and piano ensemble will concentrate on contemporary works with a folk-music flavor, include compositions by Kodály, Bartók, Ravel, Khachaturian and even Peter Schickele. Wednesday (Nov. 18) at 8pm; Dinkelspiel Auditorium, 471 Lagunita Dr., Stanford University; $10–$40; 650.725.ARTS. Nadja Salerno-Sonnenberg takes up the baton for the C:L 8:CIJGN 8=6B7:G DG8=:HIG6 in an evening saluting the compositions of William Bolcom. The orchestra will showcase Bolcom’s Three Rags for String Quartet and Serenata Notturna for Oboe and Strings (with Laura Griffiths as soloists). The program will be rounded out with Richard Strauss’ Metamorphosen scored for 23 solo strings. Friday (Nov. 20) at 8pm; First United Methodist Church of Palo Alto, 625 Hamilton Ave., Palo Alto; $32–$54; 415.357.1111. In a similar vein, H>A>8DC K6AA:N HNBE=DCN pays tribute to the late Bay Area cellist Lawrence Granger with pieces by Saint-Saëns and Brahms. The featured soloist will be cellist Peter Wyrick. Friday (Nov. 20) at 7:30pm; Presbyterian Church of Los Gatos, 16575 Shannon Road, Los Gatos; also Saturday (Nov. 21) at 7:30pm; Holy Trinity Episcopal Church, 330 Ravenswood Ave., Menlo Park; $15/$20; 408.873.9000.

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Michael S. Gant

[45]


[46] STAGE/ART/LIT

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 STAGE/ART/LIT

South Bay Guitar Society presents classical & flamenco guitar master

Adam del Monte Sat, Nov 21 8 PM AMERICAN SONGBOOK!!Uif!ijtupsz!pg!uif!Bnfsjdbo!fyqfsjfodf!jo!uif!31ui!dfouvsz!jt!dbquvsfe!jo!

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Le Petit Trianon Theatre, 72 N. 5th Street, downtown San Jose Tickets: $25/20/15 order on-line: www.sbgs.org or 408 292-0704

Discover the Arts www.svArts.org

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Optometrists!

[47]


[48] FILM

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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METROGUIDE

Pushing Too Hard Lee Daniels’ ‘Precious’ survives on its acting, but the story is marred by a judgmental scheme of right and wrong By Richard von Busack

S

HAKESPEARE may have been wrong when he wrote that the world is a tragedy to those who think and a comedy to those who feel. Peruse the public reaction to the much-laureated Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire, and it appears to be the other way around. Lee Daniels’ tragedy, which won double awards at Sundance, seems to be elevated to the status of something special by its noteworthy acting. The best of that acting is the fated-to-be-Oscared performance by Mo’Nique. Her performance is not a huge surprise, because she stole Daniels’ crime drama Shadowboxer, a similar mix of the nutty and the nittygritty. As in any fated-to-be-Oscared role, Mo’Nique’s tough, blocked performance yields to a spectacular meltdown. Mo’Nique’s verbal aria is the part of the story that escapes melodrama, the part that seems most plausible, explaining how an unnatural mother becomes that way. But when critics kvell so heartily, watch out. Owen Gleiberman, for instance, wrote that “Precious is a film that makes you think, There but for the grace of God go I.” I hate to be a bastard about these things, but that’s exactly what I felt like reading his review. It’s surprising how undiscomfiting Precious really is, unless you’ve had some personal experience of the less-than-$20,000a-year life. It’s 1987, during some of Harlem’s most suffering years, with AIDS

and the crack epidemic doing their deadly work. As a girl of immense girth, 16-year-old Claireece (Gabourey “Gabby” Sidibe), known as Precious, wishes herself out of her flesh, looking into the mirror and seeing a thin blonde looking out, or murmuring her desire for a boyfriend with “good hair.” (Sometimes she has very fancy daydreams—placing herself into the public-TV station’s film broadcast of De Sica’s Two Women, a subtitled story of rape and occupation that doesn’t seem like a semiliterate Harlem girl’s choice of viewing, somehow.) The system works a little bit. Pressured out of public school, Precious makes her way to an each-one-teach-one alternative school, where she learns to write her own story in a journal. She has intelligence, but she can’t focus, and we learn why in flashback; she was serially raped by her mother’s boyfriend. (We see this situation in bits and flashes.) As a result, Precious brought a child to term; it has Down Syndrome, so she calls it Mongo, short for Mongoloid. And her scathing, angry mother, Mary (Mo’Nique), blames her daughter for this baby, urging her to stop this foolishness about school and go on to welfare. Watching Sidibe, we see something of what this movie could have been if it hadn’t been so overcooked—the flickering of expressions on this biggerthan-life woman could have been leavened with some kind of cutting, secret humor or the kind of wrath that forgives nobody. But except for a scene of pilfering some fried chicken,

Precious doesn’t act out much; she gets ground down by her terrible mother, and then the trouble begins. The film is based on the poet Sapphire’s novel Push—the title coming from a doctor’s instructions to a mother in childbirth. The movie pushes its cement-solid conception of greasy frying pans, droning TV sets and fungusy walls. And the politics won’t inflame anyone: Precious is practically a pre-Clinton-era dream of the need for welfare reform. Trying to lighten up matters, there’s a scene at an urban hospital where the staff (particularly Lenny Kravitz as the nurse) behaves like the teddy bear’s picnic; fellow students who previously disliked Precious are now on her side. And there’s no indication that Kravitz’s nurse John isn’t so friendly simply because of Precious’ tendency to project love where there isn’t any, as in her earlier, hopeless crush on a white math teacher. Mariah Carey is the movie’s other small surprise, doing some actually low-key acting, as a social worker significantly named “Ms. Weiss” (calling her Ms. White might have been too thick). Sapphire has said that Precious is a composite, made from the girls she was teaching in the Bronx and Harlem. Maybe it’s the compositing process that’s the trouble. Is Precious’ story possible? Of course it is—these situations could happen to any endangered child. Part of the reason the film has been knocking people’s guts out on the film-festival circuit is because all these things happen to one

girl. Show a person hit by lightning, and you’re showing something that could happen; show that person hit by all the bolts in the world, and you’ve got a type of cartoon. The little-film-that-could rep is due to a push by executive producers Tyler Perry and Oprah Winfrey. Oprah’s comment in the Entertainment Weekly feature on the film, “I see her [girls like Precious, that is] waiting for the bus as I’m passing by my limo,” sounds like parody but is the real thing. You watch Precious go by from your personal limo—the comfort of a theater seat—and you know exactly where to feel revulsion and where to feel the updraft of uplift. When a supporting actress steals a show, it’s the director’s fault; it means the main character isn’t as well-turned somehow. In her searing speech, Mo’Nique’s Mary—ironically named after the ultimate sacred mother— asks not to be judged. But Precious has a judgmental streak that won’t quit. And that’s been essential to a success worthy of its sensationalism. The judgment is the part that attracted Perry and Winfrey. By the end of the movie, you know who all the heroes and all the villains are, and you can go home comfortable. PRECIOUS: BASED ON THE NOVEL PUSH BY SAPPHIRE (R; 110 min.), directed by Lee Daniels, written by Geoffrey Fletcher, photographed by Andrew Dunn and starring Gabourey Sidibe and Mo’Nique, opens Nov. 20.

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METROGUIDE

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 MUSIC

[53]

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Secret of The Klok Dethklok mastermind loves metal, hates comedy By Steve Palopoli

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ED Zeppelin’s shark sex legend. Axl’s riot in St. Louis. Burzum’s church burnings. Ozzy biting the heads off bats and doves. Two words: child’s play. How could any of these supposedly controversial masters of the dark metal arts compete with a band that drew 300,000 fans to the Arctic Circle to hear them play one song, made them sign “pain waivers” releasing the group from liability, then dropped from the sky in a giant spiked metal box, killing untold numbers of audience members, before pouring giant vats of scalding hot coffee on the rest, melting off their faces? Now that’s metal! And it could only have been pulled off by one band: Dethklok. Of course, they’re a cartoon. But then, so’s Ozzy. If you don’t remember hearing about the Arctic Circle massacre, it’s because it happened on the Adult Swim show Metalocalypse, set in a world in which metal truly rules. Just starting its third season, it imagines Dethklok as not only the most popular band on Earth, but as the world’s seventh largest economy. Rich and powerful beyond any group’s wildest dreams, they’re treated more like superheroes, though they lack the ability to do anything besides bring the metal. Even preparing a single meal on their

own is a disaster. Meanwhile they are targeted by a shadowy Bond-villaintype organization while they rerecord their albums over and over (including in the Marianas trench), because they’re not heavy enough. On Saturday, Dethklok (vocalist Nathan Explosion, guitarists Toki Wartooth and Skwesgaar Skwigelf, bassist William Murderface, drummer Pickles) will open for Mastodon at the San Jose State Event Center—despite being fictional animated characters. How this is achieved is a Gorrilazlike live presentation put together by Brendon Small, the co-creator of Metalocalypse who writes the music and provides voices for three members of Dethklok, including the Cookie Monster–style death-metal vocals of Nathan Explosion. While the characters are projected onscreen, he and his band are onstage playing. This is the second time Small has attempted to take his imaginary band on the road. The thing is that the songs for the show, even when they’re funny, are fairly perfect death-metal numbers. And something strange seems to be developing at these latest shows: people want to actually hear the music. “Something happened between the last tour and this one,” says Small. We’ve gotten an influx of guitar nerds. That’s really the audience I wanted to attract, because that was

me when I was 15. I was a nerd.” The shift in perception of a Dethklok show from a place to see a Spinal Tap–like comic satirizing of extreme-metal stereotypes (especially the idea that nothing is “brutal” or “heavy” enough, even if everyone and everything in sight is being wiped out) to a place to go simply to hear that extreme metal suits Small just fine. Because surprisingly enough, he claims to not care too much about being funny. “It’s an excuse for me to play guitar,” he says of the tour. “I kind of hate comedy.” That’s a pretty metal thing to say, isn’t it? Small admits to growing up obsessed with guitar stardom while learning how to shred in suburbia. But by the time he got good, metal was completely uncool, so he went into standup comedy. He previously created the show Home Movies, which ended on Adult Swim in 2004, after four seasons. Besides lending his voice to shows like the The Venture Bros. and Aqua Teen Hunger Force, he developed Metalocalypse with his friend Tommy Blancha, producing 11-minute episodes that began airing in 2006. In 2007, the second season began in conjunction with the release of the first Dethklok album, The Dethalbum. Small has just released The Dethalbum II, which figures into his desire to not make people laugh.

“I don’t think the second record’s that funny,” he says. “I didn’t actually go for jokes on the second record.” Well, it’s kind of funny. A death-metal album with a song about the health-care crisis? That’s pretty much what “Deth Support” is, though its solution is, of course, “pull the plug, pull the plug, pull the plug.” Small does admit that’s pretty funny. He also admits he still likes to tweak the genre. Its obsession with death, for instance. “There’s stuff that’s worse than dying,” he says. “If your pants don’t fit, that’s fucking brutal. That’s a death-metal song.” As for his vocals, he says they’re achieved with a combination of “chocolate milk and Cooler Ranch Doritos.” And his list of favorite Cookie Monster vocalists isn’t limited to, say, Cannibal Corpse’s George Fisher or Napalm Death founder Nic Bullen. “Tom Waits has got a great death-metal voice. Fat Albert had a great death-metal voice,” he says. As for what’s in store for Metalocalypse after this Dethklok tour, Small admits that after several dozen episodes in three years, he’s burnt. “If I don’t get a break, the show’s going to end very quickly,” he says. DETHKLOK opens for MASTODON on Saturday, Nov. 21, at 6pm at SJSU Event Center, 290 S. Seventh St., San Jose. Tickets are $34.50; 408.924.6333.


[54] GALLERY

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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[55]


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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 MUSIC

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[61]


[62]

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 MUSIC

CONCERT FILE

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[63]


[64]

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[65]

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> ]VkZ V `cVX` [dg ÒcY^c\ i]Z adlZhi d[ i]Z adl ^c i]Z igVh] e^aZh d[ ]jbVc Zm^hiZcXZ# 7Z^c\ idd c^XZ VcY ]Vk^c\ adl hZa["ZhiZZb ]Vh bZVci i]Vi >ÉkZ YViZY V adc\ a^hi d[ adhZgh# I]Z bdhi gZXZci adhZg ldg`h l^i] bZ# L^i]dji bn `cdlaZY\Z! ]Z idd` e]didh d[ jh ]Vk^c\ hZm! VcY ZbV^aZY i]Zb id bZc Vi djg ldg`eaVXZ# >Éb idiVaan ZbWVggVhhZY# > lVciZY id egZhh X]Vg\Zh! Wji b^gVXjadjhan! cd dcZ XaV^bh id ]VkZ hZZc i]ZhZ e]didhÅjcaZhh i]Zn YdcÉi lVci id ]jb^a^ViZ bZ Wn hVn^c\ hd# ÅBdgi^ÒZY If a man’s going to make your dream come true, it’s best it isn’t that one where you suddenly find yourself naked in front of everybody at work. The good news is, on the humiliation front, there’s no place to go but up: Toilet paper on your shoe, tuck your skirt into your pantyhose? You’re having a good day! You could consider legal action. Unlike in sexual harassment cases where somebody claims “After he said I had pretty hair, I could no longer do my job as an accountant,” your experience sounds like textbook “hostile workplace.” According to law prof Kingsley Browne’s Biology at Work, that’s a work situation that’s “permeated with sexuality or ‘discriminatory intimidation, ridicule, and insult’” severe enough to change the conditions of the victim’s employment and create an abusive work environment. If you talk to a lawyer, you may find that you could have a pretty good case. After all, what could the guy’s defense possibly be, “I don’t have a kid so I thought I’d celebrate ‘Bring Your Girlfriend in a Compromising Position to Work Day’”? But, even by winning a case, do you actually win? Just by filing suit, you’re probably setting yourself up for “The Streisand Effect”—which, unfortunately, doesn’t mean gay men will drop everything and fly across the globe whenever you sing anywhere but the shower. The term was coined after an aerial photo of Barbra

Streisand’s Malibu home was one of about 12,000 included in an online database documenting coastal erosion. These still shots of land eroding weren’t exactly garnering TMZ-style traffic—until Babs filed a $10 million lawsuit against the photographer to get the shot of her house removed, driving more than 420,000 people to view it in a single month. In other words, even by talking with coworkers about what happened, you could end up, well . . . making a mountain out of a thigh mole. Try to remember that the maggot who did this to you is the one who’s gotten naked in the ugliest way— exposing himself as somebody who gets off on doing violence to a girl’s reputation. What happened, was he no longer getting the same thrill out of Xeroxing his butt? Barenaked Saturday didn’t show up on Bagel Monday because you’re “too nice,” but because you’re too willing to accept losers as your lot in life. Having low selfesteem isn’t the problem, either—it’s having it and not doing a damn thing about it. You can have a nice guy in your life—if you develop yourself into a person who feels she deserves it, and actually demands it. In the meantime, hold your head high. Time will pass, and eventually, feeling naked at the office will once again mean knowing that they can all see you forgot to wear earrings—not that you forgot to make an appointment at the waxer.

>ÉkZ WZZc YVi^c\ bn Wdn[g^ZcY [dg i]gZZ nZVgh# =^h l^[Z d[ (% nZVgh Y^ZY h^m nZVgh V\d! Wji ]Z hi^aa XVaah ]Zg Èbn l^[Z!É iVa`ZY VWdji ]Zg ^c i]Z WZYgddb jci^a > \di bVY! VcY hi^aa bZci^dch ]Zg XdchiVcian# L]Zc > \di Vc\gn VWdji i]Vi! ]Z WaZl je VcY hV^Y ]ZÉY iVa` VWdji ]Zg l]ZcZkZg VcY ]dlZkZg ]Z lVcih# > adkZ ]^b! Wji ^h i]^h cdgbVa4 ÅHVY =ZVgi Three’s a crowd, even if one of you is dead. Now, after 30 years, it’s normal that he’d still talk about her. To a point. Yet, there you are in bed, enjoying the afterglow, and he rolls over and says, “Betty and I went to the Ozarks one time. Had a great time. Doubt you and I could ever match it. Might as well stay home and talk about Betty!” What he really needs to talk about is whether he wants a new

life or just an audience for the old one. In a neutral moment, tell him you know he loved her and had a wonderful life with her, but it hurts to always be hearing about her—and in a way that sounds like he’s married to her and getting some on the side from you. If he wants to be with you, he needs to act like he accepts that he lost his wife—and not just somewhere between Spencer’s Gifts and Cinnabon.

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NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009

ADVICE GODDESS

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CLASSIFIEDS NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

metro CLASSIFIEDS

CLASSIFIED INDEX 66 68 68 68

PLACING AN AD 69 70 70 71

Single Services Employment Family Services Music

Legal & Public Notices Automotive Home Improvement Real Estate

.

g Employment Jobs

Technology Electronic Data Systems, LLC (EDS, HP Enterprise Services), is accepting resumes for *Testing Specialist* in Mountain View, CA (Ref. #EDSMOUCAR1). Under minimal direction, utilize appropriate testing methodology & apply specialization to develop test plan for test level to be executed for project, as specified in testing strategy for project. Coordinate & collaborate with others in analyzing collected requirements to ensure test plan & identify testing solutions meet customer needs & expectations. Requires Master’s or foreign degree equivalent in Electrical Engg, Comp Sci, Comp Engg, Electronic Engg, or related field, plus 4 yrs exp in job offered, or as a Principal IT Application Analyst, Programmer Analyst or related occupation. Will acceptBachelor’s or foreign degree equivalent in Electrical Engg, Comp Sci, Comp Engg, Electronic Engg, or related field, plus 6 years post-baccalaureate, progressive experience. SQL, Oracle database,LoadRunner, Quality Center, Quick Test Professional, MS Office (Excel, PowerPoint, Word). Please mail resumes with reference number to: Ref.#EDSMOUCAR1, Paul Schwartz, Technical Delivery Manager, EDS, HP Enterprise Services, 585 South Blvd East, MS 2C, Pontiac, MI 48341. No phone calls. Must be legally authorized to work in the U.S. without sponsorship. EO

Property Claims Inspector Wanted Supplemental Income. Local Claims. Need digital camera, ladder, & internet. Email employment@ compassclaims.com for more info.

Engineering NVIDIA Corporation, market leader in graphics and digital media processors, has engineering opportunities in Santa Clara, CA: SW Engr (SWE71): Design & implement kernel level drivers; HW Engr (HW59): Perform RTL design; ASIC Design Engr (ASICDE60): Design industry’s leading graphics; Physical Design Engr (PDE09): Physical design of graphics; Systems SW Engr (SSWE60): Design & maintain graphics. If interested, ref job code and send to: NVIDIA Corporation. Attn: MS04 (L. Molina). 2701 San Tomas Expressway, Santa Clara, CA 95050. Please no phone calls, emails or faxes.

Engineer NVIDIA Corporation, market leader in graphics and digital media processors, has engineering opportunities in Santa Clara, CA: SW Engr (SWE71): Design & implement kernel level drivers; HW Engr (HW59): Perform RTL design; ASIC Design Engr (ASICDE60): Design industry’s leading graphics; Physical Design Engr (PDE09): Physical design of graphics; Systems SW Engr (SSWE60): Design & maintain graphics. If interested, ref job code and send to: NVIDIA Corporation. Attn: MS04 (L. Molina). 2701 San Tomas Expressway, Santa Clara, CA 95050. Please no phone calls, emails or faxes.

Find The Perfect Job Check out Metro’s Classifieds and find the job you’ve been searching for!

Managers & Trainees Wanted (No Layoffs Here) Need 6 people F/T and 10 people P/T to help me with my business. Full training- Start Now. Call Jerry. 408/750-7250

$$$HELP WANTED$$$ Extra Income! Assembling CD cases from Home! No Experience Necessary! Call our Live Operators Now! 1-800405-7619 EXT 2450 www.easywork-greatpay.com (AAN CAN)

Computer SR ETL DW SYSTEMS ANALYST (ETL-6). BS CS or EE +5 yrs exp in SW Dev, incl: ETL sys dev, Netezza, MS SSIS, QA, + INFA Cert, OR MS +3 yrs of exp as described. Travel required. Send resume with job code to: Kinetic Networks, PO Box 77488, San Francisco, CA 94107

Bartender / Cocktail Servers Full Time or 6 AM Part Time shift available. Alex’s 49er Inn, San Carlos & Bascom. Apply morning’s only.

g Career Development

Do you dislike your job? Come in for vocational checking. You may have talents you don’t suspect. Contact Scientology Test Center. 408-383-9400

Bartenders Needed Fun jobs. Great money. Earn $25-40/hr. Call for certification and placement information. $199 tuition with this ad. 888.901.TIPS or visit www.abcbartending.com

g Employers

our offices Monday through Friday, 8.30am Visit to 5.30pm at 550 South, First Street, San Jose.

¬

Call the Classified Department at 408.298.8000 Monday through Friday, 8.30am to 5.30pm.

Fax your ad to the Classified Department at 408.271.3520.

@

classifieds@metronews.com Please include your Visa, MC, Discover or American Express number and expiration date for payment.

±

Mail to Metro Classifieds, 550 South First Street, San Jose, CA 95113.

DEADLINES: For copy, payment, space reservation or cancellation: Display ads: Thursday 3pm Line ads: Friday 3pm

g Business Opportunities

Attention Readers Some ads in this section may require an initial investment or fee. Metro Newspapers encourages you to thoroughly investigate any advertiser’s claims before sending payment.

Gain National Exposure Reach over 5 million young, active, educated readers for only $995 by advertising in 110 weekly newspapers like this one. Call Jason at 202/289-8484. (AAN CAN)

gg Classes & Instruction

For Sale Appliances

Classes & Instruction

High School Diploma! Fast, affordable and accredited. Free brochure. Call Now!. 1-888-532-6546 ext. 97 www.continentalacademy.com (AAN CAN)

Noritz Tankless Water Heater Year End Sale. Take Advantage of 2009 Tax Credit and get a Noritz Tankless Water Heater installed for $ 1599.00. http://www.justtankless.com

g Electronics

g General Notices Miscellaneous

Electric Vehicle Battery Tech Seminar - 1/30/10

Get Dish-Free Installation $19.99 per month. HBO & Showtime Free. Over 50 HD Channels Free. Lowest Prices no equipment to buy! Call now for details: 877/242-0974. (AAN CAN)

g Miscellaneous

Three battery experts will speak about lead acid and lithium batteries in home electric vehicle conversions, as well as battery containment in the vehicle. Pre-paid registration of $100 is required. shari@electroauto.com, http://www.electroauto.com/ batteryseminar.shtml 831-429-1989

Get Dish-Free Installation

Biggest Bead Show in the West !

Private collector selling 3–6 inch Faerie Glen/Dezine fairy figurines and Thomas Kinkade lighthouses/village houses. $5-$15/piece or entire collection deal. Call 408-448-3057 or email [ mailto:cpbcinfo@gmail.com ]cpbcinfo@gmail.com

Nov.14th -15th, Marriott Oakland City Center, Broadway @ 10th St. Admission $7 for two days. For more information, visit www.BeadExtravaganza.com

$19.99 per month. HBO & Showtime Free. Over 50 HD Channels Free. Lowest Prices no equipment to buy! Call now for details: 877/238-8413. (AAN CAN)

FAIRY AND LIGHTHOUSE COLLECTION

gg Family Services

Professional Services

Adoptions

Financial Services

Pregnant? Considering Adoption? Talk with caring agency specializing in matching birthmothers with families nationwide. Living expenses paid. Call 24/7 Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions. 866/413-6293 (AAN CAN)

Most Affordable Life Insurance http://www.InsuranceInMinu tes.com. For a free no-obligation consultation, please call toll-free 1 866 364 0964

gg Miscellaneous

Music

g Instruction

School Of The Blues Blues/Jazz weekly private instruction on Harmonica, Guitar, Bass and Organ/Piano. Conveniently located near 101/Blossom Hill Rd. 408/224-2936. www.schooloftheblues.com

g Rehearsal/Recording

Genuine Analog 24 Track Analog. 24 Bit Digital. Stout Recording Studio. Randy Burk, Producer/ Session Drummer. 510-567-8572 Oakland. StoutRecordingStudio.com

The Metropolitain

Marriage breakPalo Alto Bands Monthly and hourly music down because of rehearsal space. Music Lil Wayne, E-40, incompatible per- Snoop Dog, San Quinn instrument (fretted and vintage keys) and amplifier sersonalities? Thug World Records explovice. 650.279.1793 If you and your partner are having trouble come in and get your personalities checked, as this may be the reason for your disputes. Call 408-383-9400

g Self Help

g

sive label features lil Wayne Snoop dog E-40 G-unit and more. Free Downloads, MP3s, Services RingTones, videos. www.thugworldrecords.com SessionDrummer.net 408-561-1255 Real drum parts online. Real tape sound. Digital formats Need Music? include: WAV, AIFF, Sound Got Music? Designer 2. $160.00 per song. Randy Burk, Producer/ Check out Metro's music Session Drummer. Oakland, section. To advertise call 510/567-8572 408-200-1300

Miscellaneous

Penis Enlargement FDA Medical Vacuum Pumps. Gain 1-3 inches permanently. Testosterone, Viagra, Cialis. Free brochures. 619/294-7777 www.drjoelkaplan.com (discounts available) (AAN CAN)

g Computer Services Consultants

We SOLVE Computer Problems!! Mention Metro Ad For $20 “Express Computer Tune-Up” Computer Repairs for Desktops, laptops, home networks, virus, slow/dead systems, data recovery. Microsoft Certified. Call for free quote!!! Free pickup and delivery. 408-734-3123.

Post your event ... for free!


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

g Legal Notices

Legal & Public Notices

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #529989 The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Cafe One, 1 Almaden Blvd., San Jose, 95110, Maria Olvera, 988 Summerplane Dr., San Jose, CA, 95127, Jose Luis Orduna. This business is conducted by a joint venture. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on. /s/Maria Olvera This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 10/14/09. (pub Metro 11/11, 11/18, 12/02, 12/09/2009)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #530349 The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Lavo Realty, 6120 Hellyer Ave., Suite 100, San Jose, CA, 95138.

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #529378

ROB BREZSNY

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The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Shoe Candy, 50 North Santa Cruz, Los Gatos, CA, 95030, Lucille Mendes, 1062 Drexel Wy., San Jose, CA, 95121. This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Lucille Mendes This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 9/28/2009. (pub Metro 10/28, 11/04, 11/11, 11/18/2009)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #530660 The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Rajeunir Day Spa, 509 E. Campbell Ave., Campbell, CA, 95008, Yang D Hollenkamp.

[69]

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6g^Zh (March 21–April 19): “A chief event of life is This business is conducted by a Corporation. The state of Corporation: California. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on. /s/Rada Nhem President #3257423 This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 10/23/2009. (pub Metro 10/28, 11/04, 11/11, 11/18/2009)

ASTROLOGY

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Legal This business is conducted by a Individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on. /s/Yang Deng Hollenkamp This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 11/03/2009. (pub Metro 11/11, 11/18, 11/25, 12/02/2009)

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009

Business Listings

Business Listings

the day in which we have encountered a mind that startled us,” wrote Ralph Waldo Emerson. My wish for you, Aries, is that you will have many such days in the coming weeks. In fact, I hope that you will be blessed over and over again with the hair-raising thrill of having your imagination pricked, causing it to half-blossom, half-explode. To get the most out of the fantastic possibilities, set aside any tendency you might have to be a know-it-all, and instead open up your heart’s mind and your mind’s heart as wide and deep as they will go.

IVjgjh (April 20–May 20): In the beginning of his career, poet Linh Dinh loved to stay up late and write, sometimes riding a creative surge till dawn. The power of the darkness unleashed a stark fertility. He was free to think thoughts that were harder to invoke during the bright hours when hordes of wide-awake people were pouring their chattering thoughts out into the soup. Dinh’s habits changed as he aged, though, in part because he got married and chose to keep more regular hours. But his early imprint has stayed alive inside him. “Now I can write at any time of the day,” he says, “because I always carry the night inside of me.” In accordance with your astrological omens, Taurus, I’m making that your prescription for the coming week: Carry the night inside you during the day. <Zb^c^ (May 21–June 20): Mark, a friend of mine who lives in New Jersey, sent an overnight package via UPS to Jerry, a friend of his who lives 30 miles away in Pennsylvania. The delivery arrived on time, so Mark was happy with the service. But in checking the tracking information online, he discovered a curious thing: His package was loaded onto three different airplanes, passed through five different UPS offices and eventually traveled over 1,000 miles in order to arrive at Jerry’s house. I expect there’ll be a comparable scenario in your world, Gemini: A wish will be fulfilled by a very circuitous route. 8VcXZg ( June 21–July 22): Strictly speaking—going purely by the astrological omens—I conclude that you would generate amazing cosmic luck if you translated the Beatles’ song “Norwegian Wood” into Punjabi, wore shoes made of 18th-century velvet or tried out for a Turkish volleyball team. I doubt you’ll get it together to pull off those exotic feats, however, so I’ll also provide some secondbest suggestions. You won’t receive quite as much cosmic assistance from doing them, but you’ll still benefit considerably. Here are the back-ups: Begin planning where and when you’ll take a sacred vacation in 2010; meditate on who among your current allies is most likely to help you expand your world in the next 12 months; decide which of your four major goals is the least crucial to pursue; and do something dramatic to take yourself less seriously.

AZd ( July 23–Aug. 22): The most popular hobby in

my home country of America—even more popular than owning guns and pressing lawsuits—is cultivating fears. From agonizing about being lonely to ramping up paranoia about pandemic illnesses to worrying about the collapse of the economy, my fellow citizens love to fret. Outside the United States, angst accumulation ranks almost as high on the list of pastimes. Luckily, you Leos are less likely to wallow than most of the other signs—especially these days. That’s why I hope you’ll take a leadership role in the coming weeks, when many people will be dipping even deeper than usual into the fetid trough of scaremongering. Please help dispel this trend! Be your most radiant and courageous self—even bigger and brighter than usual.

K^g\d (Aug. 23–Sept. 22): An article in the Online Noetics Network profiled the work of Robert Muller, who served as assistant secretary-general of the United Nations. It said that Muller is “one of the best informed human beings on the planet,” with an “encyclopedic grasp of the facts concerning the state of the world.” And yet Muller doesn’t keep up with the news as it’s reported in the media. Instead, he simply talks to people, either in person as he travels, or on the phone, or through written correspondence. These interactions provide him with all the understanding he needs. I recommend that you try Muller’s approach for a while, Virgo. Assume that you can get all the information you really need by gathering first-hand reports from

people about what’s actually happening in their lives.

A^WgV (Sept. 23–Oct. 22): I think it’s high time to mess with the tried and true formulas. In order to do the most good for the most people, and to regenerate a wounded and weak part of yourself, you simply must create some cracks in the way things have always been done. You must push beyond your overly safe limits. But wait! Before you plunge ahead, make sure you understand this: If you want to break the rules properly, you’ve got to study them and analyze them and learn them inside out. HXdge^d (Oct. 23–Nov. 21): “There’s nothing in a

caterpillar that tells you it’s going to be a butterfly,” said philosopher Buckminster Fuller. I encourage you to make that your personal motto in the coming weeks, Scorpio. From what I can tell, you are capable of generating a transformation that will look impossible to casual observers. You have the power to change something that everyone said would never change.

HV\^iiVg^jh (Nov. 22–Dec. 21): Have you resolved

every last detail of your unfinished business? Have you tied up the loose ends, flushed out the lingering delusions, and said your final goodbyes to the old ways and old days? “Yes,” you say? You’re absolutely positive? Well then, it is with a deep sense of pleasure and relief that I hereby unbound you and unleash you. You are officially cleared for take-off into the wild blue yonder or the fizzy red vortex or the swirling green amazement, whichever you prefer.

8Veg^Xdgc (Dec. 22–Jan. 19): “There is a saying

that when the student is ready, the teacher appears,” writes Clarissa Pinkola Estes in her book Women Who Run With the Wolves. But the magic of that formula may not unfold with smooth simplicity, she says: “The teacher comes when the soul, not the ego, is ready. The teacher comes when the soul calls, and thank goodness—for the ego is never fully ready.” I’d love it if the information I just provided encouraged you to feel right at home with the jarring yet nurturing lessons that are on the way.

6fjVg^jh ( Jan. 20–Feb. 18): In the ancient Greek

epic poems the Iliad and the Odyssey, the nature of the psyche was portrayed differently from the way it is today. It was understood that people received information directly from the gods—not as vague feelings or abstract guesswork, but rather in the form of actual voices. In other words, divine beings spoke directly to human beings. These days that’s regarded as crazy; witness the incredulous reactions that most smart people had when George W. Bush said God personally told him to invade Iraq. With that as subtext, I’m going to prophesy that a deity will soon have a message for you. Be careful, though. An imposter may also slip you tips that you’d best ignore. How to tell the difference? The real thing won’t make you feel inflated or urge you to cause harm.

E^hXZh (Feb. 19-March 20): In the coming week,

keep a lookout for invisible snakes, pretend ghosts, and illusory dragons. Be prepared to gaze upon gruff displays that are no threat to you and hints of fermenting chaos that will never materialize. In other words, Pisces, your subconscious mind may be prone to conjuring up imaginary problems that have little basis in reality. I exhort you to fling them aside like a superhero brushing off toy monsters.

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[70]

STRAIGHT DOPE NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

CECIL ADAMS

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Improvement gg House Cleaning

Contractors

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Notice To Readers California law requires that contractors taking jobs that total $500 or more (labor or materials) be licensed by the Contractors State License Board. State law also requires that contractors include their license number on all advertising.

Hauling

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I should hope. To give the Chronicle some credit, though, “it’s physics” was preceded by an accurate if somewhat murky explanation that, unfortunately, you didn’t get. Let’s try again. The America’s Cup, for those whose taste in sports runs more to bowling, is the most prestigious prize in sailing. First awarded in 1851 and later named after the first ship to win the race, the ornate silver cup is pursued by sailing fanatics racing the most high-tech yachts in the world. The boats used in the original America’s Cup races were wood-and-canvas schooners, but over time they’ve evolved into computerdesigned craft made of carbon fiber and epoxy. One thing hasn’t changed, though: all that makes them go is the wind. For the 33rd America’s Cup race, to be held in February, the defender is the Swiss yacht Alinghi 5, sailed by the Société Nautique de Geneve, which won the cup in 2007 despite the handicap of having no local ocean access. The challenger is the American yacht BOR 90, sailed by BMW Oracle Racing. The team’s 2007 effort cost $200 million. BMW charges a lot for its cars, and Oracle charges a lot for its software. I can’t imagine this project is helping them hold costs down. The BOR 90 is a three-hulled yacht covering an area about the size of two basketball courts. The mast is 185 feet high and carries a half-acre of sail. Those numbers make the boat sound enormous, but to see it you’d swear there’s more mass in a toothpick. The sails catch so much wind that capsizing is a serious risk, even with a hydraulic mast that can tilt to stay vertical as the boat leans. If any boat can sail faster than the wind, you have to figure, this is it. It does, too—two to three times as fast. Not that I’d ever doubt anything I read in the Chronicle, but I thought it’d be smart to have my assistant Una check with BOR, specifically design director Mike Drummond. He confirmed two things familiar enough to sailors but mystifying to landlubbers: • Yachts can’t outrun the wind if it’s behind them. As common sense suggests, they can go no faster than the wind can push them. • However—here’s where common sense hits a tree—when yachts sail at a 45-degree angle into the wind, they can in fact go faster than the breeze that powers them. Drummond

offers two reasons for this: “less turbulence due to a better angle to the wind; and the oncoming air is faster due to the forward speed of the yacht combining with the wind.” Sound like doubletalk? It’s not. A sail is an airfoil, like an airplane’s wing. Hold a slip of paper to your lips horizontally and blow over the top— it rises, like a wing. Now hold the paper vertically and blow to one side. It pulls to that side, like a sail—and the harder you blow, the more it pulls. Now think about a sailboat in the water. The relative speed of the wind past the sail is a function of two things: first, the absolute speed of the wind (that is, relative to the ground) plus the speed of the boat moving forward. In short, the airfoil combined with the boat’s mobility acts as a multiplier. You can think of a boat sailing upwind as being in overdrive. Strictly as a matter of aerodynamics, there’s no reason a close-hauled boat can’t outrace the wind. Few do, of course, because of another factor— the drag of the boat in the water. For traditional single-hull boats, which ride relatively low, drag is considerable. Still, with the right mix of design and determination, even a single-hull boat can outrun the wind. The first America’s Cup entry to do it was the New Zealand in 1988. Today’s multihull boats, which skate on top of the water, can attain much higher speeds, and craft that don’t need to contend with water at all can go faster still. According to the World Ice Racing Circuit, ice boats can sail four to five times wind speed. In March 2009 a land sailboat reached 126 miles per hour on a dry lake bed in the Mojave Desert. By comparison, the BOR 90 may sound positively pokey—Drummond says it’s gotten close to 50 knots, or roughly 57 miles per hour. However, we’re talking about a medium in which supertankers max out at 18 miles per hour and the fastest 19th-century clipper ship achieved just 25 miles per hour. So, we clear on the concept now? If not, “it’s physics” will have to do.

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Reviews by Michael S. Gant, Steve Palopoli and Richard von Busack.

New

Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans (R; 122 min.) Werner Herzog’s shaggierthan-shaggy restatement of Abel Ferrara’s nouveau-grindhouse Bad Lieutenant of 1992. Karl Marx could have guessed it: ďŹ rst time tragedy, second time farce. Nic Cage’s Terence McDonagh walks with one shoulder hunched like Richard III, and he’s further impeded by the immense .44 handgun jutting out of the polyester waistband of his suit. Cage is on the case of a murderer who took out ďŹ ve African immigrants. He trails a drug dealer signiďŹ cantly named “Big Fateâ€? (Xzbit). It’s hard work, and the lieutenant needs lots of fortiďŹ cation from evidence-room cocaine and pills. Mostly, he’s a kind of aneur of squalor, sticking his head through tattered screen doors or spending some relaxation time with his high-priced honey Frankie (Eva Mendes, never sweeter). Fine supporting work abounds, with Jennifer

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 FILM Coolidge as a frowz, soaking up all the beer in the bayou. She’s given a makeover at the end, so Coolidge can show off the ďŹ nest prow this side of the USS Constitution. And the criminally underused Fairuza Balk is a dirty state trooper who can’t seem to keep the lieutenant awake for a tryst. Cage’s electric enthusiasm is bound to be downgraded by some. Truth is, he’s so much damn fun no one wants to to see him shift gears and get into the soulfulness of the role, as he must. In short, it’s another movie that would be heralded as deeper if there had been subtitles. (See Metroactive.com for a longer review). (Opens Nov 20 at the Century Cinema 16 in Mountain View.) The Blind Side (PG-13) A well-off family discover a homeless teenager and help him make the football team. Stars Sandra Bullock, Tim McGraw and Quinton Aaron. (Opens Nov 20.) Cosi Fan Tutte Opera broadcast of Mozart classic. (Nov 18 at 7pm at Camera 7 in Palo Alto.) The Messenger (R; 105 min.) See review on page 51. (Opens Nov 20 at Camera 3 in San Jose.) Planet 51 (PG) An animated kids’ ďŹ lm. When an earth astronaut (voiced by Dwayne

Johnson) arrives on an alien planet, he causes a panic among the cozy suburban inhabitants. (Opens Nov 20.) Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire (R; 110 min.) See review on page 48. (Opens Nov 20 at Camera 7 in Campbell and selected theaters.) Silicon Valley Jewish Film Festival Adam Resurrected (Nov 22, 3pm, Camera 12). Certainly the most unusual ďŹ lm in this year’s fest. Paul Schrader’s adaptation of Yoram Kaniuk’s novel concerns a oncerenowned Berlinese cabaret artist Adam (Jeff Goldblum, in a true comeback role), who was psychologically abused by the Nazis during the War. Now in the early 1960s, recovering in a swank yet stark Israeli sanitarium deep in the desert—and helping himself to a willing nurse (Ayelet Zurer)— Adam is forced to confront the terms of his own degradation when a new patient arrives. Closer to Shock Corridor than The Day the Clown Cried, this typically obsessive Schrader ďŹ lm is bizarre yet plausible; its subject is the hideous, alien side of humor in the face of the inconceivable. As a Nazi commandant revenging himself, Willem Dafoe exhibits his extravagant gift for displaying inconceivable evil. DeďŹ nitely not a nice story. Circumcise Me! (Nov 22, 5:30pm, Camera 12). Comedian Yisrael

Campbell’s life story includes a conversion from Christianity—including three ritual circumcisions, go ďŹ gure. Lost Islands (Nov 22, 7:30pm, Camera 12). A portrait of an Israeli family in the 1960s. (Plays Nov 1822 at Camera 12 in San Jose; www.svjff.org.) (RvB) The Twilight Saga: New Moon (PG-13; 120 min.) The wait is almost over. (Opens Nov 20.)

Revivals Foreign Correspondent/Beat the Devil (1940/1953) Alfred Hitchcock’s intrepid thriller about a journalist (Joel McCrea) who discovers Nazi termites gnawing at the windmills of Holland. Sourcing it from a serious book of news reportage, Hitchcock went to town, turning it into a mad tale of assassination and espionage; highlights include a then-state-of-the-art plane crash. Ripping stuff. BILLED WITH Beat the Devil. The lounging adventurer

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Billy Dannreuther (Bogart), stuck in a podunk Italian beach town, has a tip on some uranium ďŹ elds in Africa. His partners include Robert Morley, subbing for Sydney Greenstreet, and Peter Lorre. One of their number, Maj. Ross (Ivor Barnard), has knifed someone important in London. During the forced wait, Dannreuther’s wife, Maria (Gina Lollobrigida), takes a liking to an upper-class Englishman named Harry Chelm (Edward Underdown). Fortunately for Dannreuther, Chelm has a neglected wife: Jennifer Jones, looking better in cat’seye sunglasses than anyone has ever looked since. (Plays Nov 17-19 in Palo Alto at the Stanford Theatre.) (RvB) My Man Godfrey/The Thin Man (1936/1934) Carole Lombard was the best of all ’30s comediennes: elegant enough for romance and tough enough for slapstick. She plays a rich girl who looks for a “forgotten manâ€? as part of a scavenger hunt.

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FILM NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

).

“A scavenger hunt,” she explains, “is just like a treasure hunt, except in a treasure hunt you find something you want and in a scavenger hunt you find things you don’t want and the one who wins gets a prize, only there isn’t a prize, it’s just the honor of winning, because all the money goes to charity if there’s any money left over, but then there never is.” BILLED WITH The Thin Man. Which, by contrast, shows us the kind of marriage that dreams of marriage are made of—the liaison of Nick and Nora Charles (William Powell, Myrna Loy). (Plays Nov 24-26 in Palo Alto at the Stanford Theatre.) (RvB) Top Hat/The Gay Divorcee (1935/1934) Ginger Rogers mistakes Fred Astaire for a cheating husband, instead of a yearning bachelor. The budding love affair is complicated by the usual gang: arch-Brit Eric Blore, immortal stage foreigner Erik

Rhodes, fey Edward Everett Horton and the sizable Helen Broderick. BILLED WITH The Gay Divorcee. Astaire and Rogers in their wittiest film comedy. The immortal dances includes the acme of elegant romanticism onscreen, “Night and Day.” (Plays Nov 20-21 in Palo Alto at the Stanford Theatre.) (RvB) Niles Film Museum Regularly scheduled programs of silent movies. Nov 21: Short subjects: The Cure (1916) with Charlie Chaplin; Get Out and Get Under (1920) with Harold Lloyd; Buster Keaton in 1922’s My Wife’s Relations; and Pass the Gravy (1928) with Max Davidson. Bruce Loeb at the piano. (Plays Nov 21 in Fremont at the Niles Film Museum, 37417 Niles Blvd.) (RvB) Yankee Doodle Dandy/Swing Time (1942/1936) An irresistible and surprisingly uncorny biography of song-and-dance man George M. Cohan (James Cagney). The exuberance of the music is reflected

in Cagney’s dancing and acting. Cagney is aware of what a shrewd performer Cohan had to be—how he was born with an eye for the effect patriotic music has on a crowd. BILLED WITH Swing Time. Ginger Rogers is a dance instructor at the Gordon Dancing Academy who encounters a gambler named “Lucky” Garnett (Astaire), who is trying to ditch an inconvenient fiancee (Betty Furness). Songs include: “A Fine Romance,”“The Way You Look Tonight” and “Pick Yourself Up.” (Plays Nov 22-23 in Palo Alto at the Stanford Theatre.) (RvB)

Reviews The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day (R; 117 min.) Two vigilante Irish brothers (Sean Patrick Flanery and Norman Reedus) blast their way through Boston’s underworld. Also stars Peter Fonda and Judd Nelson. The Box (PG-13; 115 min.) A thriller about a couple given a lucrative but morally fraught choice. Stars Cameron Diaz, James Marsden and Frank Langella. Based on a short story by Richard Matheson, which is usually a good starting point for this kind of movie. Directed by Richard Kelly, hoping to get his Donnie Darko mojo back.

Dust of Life (Unrated; 90 min.) Le-Van Kiet’s drama about a the orphaned son of a pair of boat people, growing up in Orange County. (RvB) An Education (PG-13; 95 min.) Lone Scherfig’s British coming-of-age film ends with a marathon session of tea brewing, but it has its good points. The look is cool—1960ish England may be more interesting than the full-blown and overexposed later ’60s. Twickenham-raised Jenny (Carey Mulligan) is studying for Oxford when she gets picked up by David (Peter Sarsgaard), a slightly older rotter; his slightly cruel eyes and flat smile forecast trouble to come. Until then, Jenny gets to see London highlife and nightclubs, and voyages to Paris. Smelling class, and wanting to make their hard-working daughter happy, Jenny’s parents (Cara Seymour, Alfred Molina) relax the leash. And that’s when the young girl learns how David makes his money without working days. No one in the movie apparently saw one of those melodramas about the wealthy seducer who steals a poor but honest girl; letting that matter aside, Mulligan is charming, the meetcute is deft and Olivia Williams bears all the movie’s spine as a deliberately drabbed-down English teacher. Nick Hornby’s screenplay, from Lynn Barber’s memoir, might have meant he had input on the film’s excellent pre–Swinging London soundtrack. Singer

Beth Rowley steals the show as the breathy canary at one nightspot. (RvB) The Fourth Kind (PG-13; 98 min.) The story of an Alaskan town where people keep disappearing. Could it be alien abduction? Only Sarah Palin knows for sure. Good Hair (PG-13; 95 min.) A genuine work of investigative journalism. And it’s a risky story, too, all about the time and treasure that people of color spend in search of “good hair”: lank hair that behaves like white people’s tresses. Rock shows the political side of the fashion: “Hair relaxers relax white people.” But Rock doesn’t harangue, either. He is, needless to say, funny as hell, even when dealing with the prickly subject of how much beauty products cost. It’s staggering. A weave can cost $1,000 or more, and it won’t last for more than a few months. Rock gives all due respect to the importance of the beauty salon and the barbershop as small businesses that are centers for the black community. But Rock also wonders about the caustic chemicals that, if trends continue, will one day be sizzling the scalps of his own two daughters. Good Hair nears 60 Minutes status when Rock explores the hair market in India: a profit maker for a huge temple where the poor get their heads shaved to pay off promises they made to God. (RvB)


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 FILM The Men Who Stare at Goats (R; 93 min.) George Clooney stars in the story of a reporter who stumbles across a secret military project designed to harness psychic powers. Also stars Ewan McGregor and Jeff Bridges. Michael Jackson’s This Is It (PG; 112 min.) A last look at the late icon. Paranormal Activity (R; 99 min.) This is being touted as “the next Blair Witch Projectâ€?—meaning, essentially, horror’s new runaway phenomenon—but there are very important differences that should help it avoid the dreaded Blair backlash. There are similarities, sure. Writer-director Oren Peli made this for $15,000, and the plot is about what you can expect anybody to get out of $15,000. It has a young couple, played by Katie Featherston and Micah Sloat using their real names (in what seems like an homage to Blair Witch), believing something unusual and disturbing is going on in their house. Micah buys a handheld camera to try to capture it on ďŹ lm, recording day and night. This leads to the movie’s biggest aw, also a weakness in Blair Witch, CloverďŹ eld and almost any other movie that uses this device, what I call Why Am I Picking Up the Camera Right Now Syndrome. It pulls me out of the movie when I have to think about,“Wait, would someone really go pick up the camera and ďŹ lm this if that was happening?â€? However, it also leads to lots of genuinely creepy footage, and a lot of powerful shocks. Peli’s excellent sense of timing makes this the scariest movie anyone will see this year. The biggest difference is that unlike Blair Witch, Paranormal Activity delivers on its name, with extreme prejudice. (SP) Paris (R; 130 min.) Director/writer CĂŠdric Klapisch’s intriguing if lightweight tag-team ďŹ lm. He takes to the heights of the city—Montmartre, the helipad at the Tour Montparnasse, the Eiffel Tower and, most important, the top oor of a Haussmann-era building directly above Gambetta Metro. There, a former chorus dancer at the Moulin Rouge, Pierre (Romain Duris), is mortally ill with a heart condition. Pierre’s sister, Elise (Juliette Binoche), a social worker, moves in to nurse Pierre, bringing her brood of fatherless children. The ďŹ lm is like a pile of jackstraws, rather than a solid structure; the loosest ends are the subplots in Cameroon and North Africa, where new immigrants are trying to get to where the euros are. Karin Viard is hilarious as a racist bakery owner; the ace comic actor Fabrice Luchini plays a history professor, undone by modern temptations. (RvB)

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Pirate Radio (R; 135 min.) Director/writer Richard Curtis’ ďŹ lm wastes a roster of ďŹ rst-rate actors, including Philip Seymour Hoffman, Bill Nighy, Nick Frost and January Jones. Curtis also rubbishes a fascinating story, the history of how ship-to-shore radio short-circuited the BBC’s ban on rock music during the 1960s. Taking this interesting David and Goliath story, Curtis’ inspiration was to put pontoons under Animal House and oat it. Kenneth Branagh plays the John Cleese–like fussy inspector, who determines to use the British government to shut down the musical madcaps aoat on a boat, broadcasting in the North Sea. Nighy plays the saturnine owner of the boat, and he has the proper louche 1960s air but nothing to do with it; he stands around, making the sour persimmon face, and we wait for something to happen. Hoffman is the legend-in-his-own mind American DJ called the Count. Some rivalry is established when a fellow Yank DJ arrives on the boat: repeat-offender Rhys Ifans playing the silky Gavin Cavanaugh. (RvB0 A Serious Man (R; 105 min.) All the themes in the Coen brothers’ previous ďŹ lms blend harmoniously in this terriďŹ c tale of comedic woe and horror. Minneapolis, 1967: a meek professor Larry Gopnik (stage actor Michael Stuhlbarg, looking like a dispirited Harold Lloyd) teaches physics at a small college. Gopnik is tantalized with the possibility of tenure, betrayed by his wife with their neighbor Sy Ableman, a clammy, polyester-clad swine (Fred Melamed, brilliant). Gopnik’s son Danny (Aaron Wolff) has a cowlike indifference to his father’s plight. And Larry must take charge of his unemployable brother Arthur (Richard

Kind), an obese holy fool. The postmodern moments give A Serious Man a vaudeville kick: a prologue about the appearance of a demon in the old-time Jewish ghetto is staged like a lost episode of Mario Bava’s Black Sunday. In another of this ďŹ lm’s parables, a Hebrew message is carved by God into the teeth of a gentile to teach—what? some indecipherable lesson, like the physics equations on Larry’s chalkboard, like the Hebrew letters Danny is too dumb to learn. Photographer Roger Eakins and composer Carter Burwell do outstanding work making these episodes coalesce into a fever dream of persecution and encroachment. (RvB) Skin (PG-13; 107 min.) The absurd but inexorable logic of South Africa’s apartheid era is laid out with considerable emotional impact in Skin. Based on a true story, the ďŹ lm follows the difďŹ cult life of Sandra Laing, born in the mid-1950s with skin color and features that would make her black in the eyes of the law, except that her parents are both white. As a genetic researcher later admits in front of an embarrassed courtroom, most Afrikaner settlers have African blood. The law makes clumsy attempts to cope with the situation— Sandra is at ďŹ rst termed white because of her parentage, then “coloredâ€? by her appearance, then white again. The whiplash affects her whole life, tearing at the fabric of her family, poisoning her relationships and thrusting her into poverty. This is a grim chronicle leavened by some ďŹ ne acting. Young Sandra is played by the very appealing, wide-eyed young ďŹ rsttimer Ella Ramangwane. Sophie Okonedo (last seen in The Secret Life of Bees) takes over as the grown-up Sandra, valiantly trying to ďŹ nd a way to cope with personal and societal

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[51]

FILM REVIEW

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Bearing Bad News Two soldiers must tell the living about the dead in ‘The Messenger’

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OODY HARRELSON may be the John Wayne our war in Iraq deserves. If Harrelson’s newest, The Messenger, seems to run off the rails, it may have been intended to be the kind of movie that wasn’t supposed to be on the rails in the ďŹ rst place. Here is an effort to make a small-camera movie about the Iraq war veterans trying to cope with the sorrow and wrath. Made in the shadow of The Last Detail, The Messenger has a profane streak; and like that Robert Towne movie, it features a pair of soldiers on a sort of liberty leave—at least, they’re unsupervised and on the road sometimes. Harrleson’s Capt. Stone is a CNO (Casualty NotiďŹ cation OfďŹ cer), one of the pair of soldiers who turn up on doorsteps to regret to inform. He seems self-assured—he’s an easy-going Southern girl-chaser. And he feels there’s a system behind what he’s doing—“Do not touch the NOK [next of kin].â€? Stone has enough of a sense of humor to put “The Funeral Marchâ€? on his ringtone. Stone’s new partner, Sgt. Montgomery (Ben Foster), is a simmering, tattooed fan of punk rock; he’s scarred from the war and is boiling with his own contempt for the civilians around him. The horror of this assignment seems realistic. The Messenger seems to have inside details about what needs to be done, such as the importance of getting to the fateful doorstep ďŹ rst before the blogs or the newspapers. And the two-man team keep the pity for themselves and not for the survivors. The ďŹ rst persons we see informed—the pregnant ďŹ ancee and the mother of the killed-in-Iraq soldier—blow up, howling: it’s clear it’s a job for which there is no real preparation. But we start to see celebrity actors playing the bereaved: Steve Buscemi as a spitting, furious father; Samantha Morton, plumped and cushiony, with hair swept back to look like late-period Ann-Margret. That’s when the ďŹ lm’s previous death’s-head irony starts to grow a little familiar and domestic. One can’t stop watching Harrelson, who—despite cartoony work this year— seems on the verge of something great. He’s already an assured movie star, and The Messenger is proof that he is much more than that. No one today can do the way-outside man who has something to teach as well as Harrelson, and while Zombieland parodied that kind of man, this demonstrates that Harrelson can do it straightforward. It’s a Wayne world he inhabits: he’s a seasoned soldier too cracked by his own experience to ďŹ t in to a peaceable world. Writer-turned-director Oren Moverman did the research; the slang sounds right (the soldiers use the word “Jodyâ€? to describe the guy who stayed behind and helped himself to your girlfriend). He also uses ideas and symbols that could have been done without; the ďŹ rst shot of Sgt. Montgomery, putting eye drops in his wounded eye, all but says, “This man cannot weep.â€? And the last third seems particularly shook up—a little drinking and ďŹ ghting, a little bonding, this way to the hopeful ending. The locations, in New Jersey’s aluminum-siding belt, give the story some kind of realism, and Morton’s sober, delicate acting seems right. Inside this movie is a much harsher and bigger ďŹ lm, and Harrelson might have shown the way to it. Richard von Busack THE MESSENGER (R; 105 min.), directed by Oren Moverman, written by Moverman and Alessandro Camon, photographed by Bobby Bukowski and starring Woody Harrelson and Ben Foster, opens Nov. 20 at Camera 3 in San Jose.


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FILM NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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upheaval. Alice Krige is touching as Sandra’s mother, but the real surprise is Sam Neill, who gives a subtle, wound-up performance as Sandra’s father. Abraham Laing’s love for his daughter is deep and strong; in the early scenes, he sticks up for her with admirable courage. But eventually, tragically, he too is driven to near madness by the artificially enforced divisions that ruled South Africa for so many decades. At times, director Anthony Fabian is guilty of laying on the blows of apartheid with too heavy a hand, but the film earns its tearful, haltingly hopeful conclusion. (MSG) 2012 (PG-13, 158 min.) Nutty but not crunchy ripoff of When Worlds Collide. A few minutes are absolutely high art: a lovingly detailed sequence of downtown L.A. wobbling on all sides of a mile-deep fissure in the earth, the skyscrapers dancing around its brink or keeling over in slow faints. Being Roland Emmerich, the director must cut away from this splendor to John Cusack, his ex-wife Amanda Peet and his family (adorable daughter and bratty son), and the ex-wife’s new squeeze, an expendable plastic surgeon (Thomas McCarthy)—better the whole world be inundated than one American nuclear family should be sundered. No surprise, 2012 is a film of sequences and of wildly uneven tone. (RvB) Where the Wild Things Are (PG; 101 min.) The beast suits—part costumes, part CGI—are accurate versions of the Sendak illustrations. Max Records seems just right as Max, the little boy whose father is out of the picture, who flees to a monster island. The feature film gives children due respect for their towering moods. But children’s moods change, and this film’s mood doesn’t. It’s essentially gloomy, like a collection of Peanuts strips clipped of their punch lines. The film is staged in an Australian forest, the domain of seven or eight depressed creatures (Lauren Ambrose, James Gandolfini and Catherine O’Hara, among others). They’re cautious and fretful; they form cliques and snipe at each other. The rumpusing beastliness always ends with some injury, as per Mom’s warning about how it’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt. Scriptwriter Dave Eggers’ work is typically formless, cute and drifty. There’s no artistic force behind this movie, only whims and anxieties. A parting word from the beasts,“When you go home, will you say good things about us?,” seems addressed to a baffled audience. It’ll be a cult item for aging-children hipster types, the ones who would wear their terrycloth wolf-suits to work if they could. (RvB)

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