Metro Silicon Valley

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FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 · VOL. 25, NO. 50 · SAN JOSE, CA · FREE

Win: ‘Romeo & Juliet’ Ballet Tickets | John Mayer 6th Row Seats METROGIVEAWAYS.COM

Rub a Dub Hug A new way to cuddle up p53

Lars Attacks Stanford’s dopest graduate, MC Lars, celebrates 10 years of laptop rap p67

Santa Claran Ashley Lindley of MTV’s RWDC is a new kind of celeb p16

Felipe F elipe Buitr Buitrago ag go

Real World Yellowstone Y e ello owstone Journalism Jo ournalism Tim Cahill’s Cahill’s journey journey to to our o backyard backyard

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FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

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[04] CCONTENTS ONTENTS

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

[05]


[06] LETTERS

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

are being investigated by the FBI as terrorists. The gag-order-containing National Security Letters portion of the act has been abused since the warrant requirement was lifted: 183,000 NSLs were issued between 2003 and 2005 alone, and 53 percent of those “terrorists� subpoenaed under gag order by the FBI were Americans, according to the ACLU. Please call Congress and just s ay no! to renewing the Patriot Act and making the abuses even worse. Typically the FBI and the feds have been overinvoking “endangerment to national security� as excuse for secrecy. Enough already, not on our dime! Thank you! Drina Brooke Novato

One Thumb Up

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Less Drama

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I don’t think this article (“The War Isn’t Over,â€? Fly, Feb. 3) is very fair and balanced. I wish the media would give us voters a break here. I’m tired of trying to ďŹ gure out who to vote for with this type of reporting on candidates. More facts please and less drama! Thanks!

Hot mashed ďŹ ddlesticks and thwapping mashed potatoes! I am tired of the fearmongering by the feds, how about you? Yet that is exactly what is going on in Congress right now, as the debate to renew and worsen the FBI-empowering Patriot Act is happening, according to the ACLU. The act allows FBI and police to seize property and arrest without warrant or probable cause. The Center for Constitutional

Kathleen From SanJoseInside.com

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Rights, the ACLU, Marjorie Cohn as president of the National Lawyers Guild, the American Rie Association, Bruce Fein, former U.S. Attorney General and more all agree that its “overbroadâ€? terrorist deďŹ nition includes activists and is designed to clamp down on free speech. UC-Berkeley students against the Iraq war, Food Not Bombs, the Quaker American Friends Service Committee, Greenpeace, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals and more

It’s easy to be cynical about this given the city’s schizophrenic treatment of downtown businesses (millions in subsidies followed by iron-ďŹ sted nightclub police and strict code enforcement)—but the fact is this looks like a pretty good plan (“City Life,â€? Cover Story, Feb. 3). I hope the council listens to the smart people quoted in this article. A thriving downtown is good for everyone in the valley. Local From SanJoseInside.com

At Long Last At long last, the Supreme Court has made a decision that real

Psycho Ex

Americans can get solidly behind by ending second-class citizenship for long-oppressed corporations. Restricted for decades, their freedom of speech curtailed and stied, corporations could only spend limited amounts on election campaigns; a disgraceful deďŹ ling of their First Amendment rights. Not since their greatest hour— preventing Al Gore from becoming president—has the court triumphed in the cause of free-market democracy. Finally, corporations, their tiny voices choked by the campaign-ďŹ nance-reform fanatics, can be heard throughout the land. Their long-overdue full personhood has been established, and they are now free to speak their minds and support with their heard-earned fortunes the righteous and deserving. Bite on that, liberal Democratic (redundant?) surrender-monkeys. Only trouble is they didn’t go far enough. Everyone knows corporations are persons and deserving of individual rights—so why can’t they vote or run for office or get married if they want? Why are corporations left out in the cold, excluded from the warm inner sanctity of full citizenship? This was a glaring oversight in jurisprudence, but it’s only a matter of time. Rejoice, fellow real Americans, and imagine the incredible mess we’d be in now if Gore had become president. One shudders to think. We’d all be forced to marry trees and put clothing on animals. Will Shonbrun Boyes Springs

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I saw you irting with her. When I mentioned it, you told me I was being insecure and jealous and that you two were “just friends.â€? When you dumped me, you told me that it had nothing to do with her, that you just wanted to be alone. When I saw you with her a few days later, cooing and cuddling at a restaurant that you know I frequent, you called ME a stalker. When I said that you needed to learn a few new moves, get some class and that I actually felt sorry for your new squeeze, you called ME a “psycho ex.â€? Hmmmm—you referred to ALL your ex-girlfriends as “psycho exes.â€? Now I know why. It’s YOU who is a psycho, a-hole. SEND US your anonymous rants and raves about your co-workers or any badly behaving citizen—or about citizens you admire. I SAW YOU, Metro, 550 S. First St., San Jose, 95113, or via email to Isawyou@metronews.com.

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

[07]


[08] SILICON ALLEYS

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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IGHT NOW, travel writer Tim Cahill is the Lurie Distinguished Visiting Writer at San Jose State University’s Center for Literary Arts. That means he is teaching a few classes during the spring semester and will stage a few events as well. Aside from being one of the founding editors of Outside, Cahill has penned numerous books, especially 2004’s Lost in My Own Backyard, a guide to wandering around Yellowstone on foot. The book is part of the Crown Journeys Series from Crown Publishing, a literary travel series matching renowned writers with their favorite places—more often than not, their home turfs. The books are short, easy reads, usually anywhere from 120 to 180 pages. Other works in the series include Blues City: A Walk in Oakland by Ishmael Reed, Land’s End: A Walk in Provincetown by Michael Cunningham and Time and Tide: A Walk Through Nantucket by Frank Conroy. I became enamored of the series primarily because the only prerequisite is that the writers take their journeys on foot. And of course, the first one I bought was the one Chuck Palahniuk wrote, titled Fugitives and Refugees: A Walk Through Portland, Oregon, which came out in 2003. I interviewed Palahniuk when he was putting that project together, and he told me, to paraphrase, that the experience wasn’t going exactly as planned. The publisher was insisting that he paint a syrupy, romantic, sentimental and tender portrait of his hometown and that he follow the lead of some of the other, more poignant works in the series. Well, if you’re familiar with Palahniuk (he wrote Fight Club), he doesn’t do that. Instead, he wanted to write about stripper bingo, feral-cat races, kayaking in the sewers, dive antique shops, thrift stores, the sex industry, haunted houses, mass drunken rampages in Santa suits, a vacuum cleaner museum and the world’s largest hairball. After endless battles and negotiations, he finally came up with a version that satisfied the publisher. You can read it for yourself. It’s an amazing example of hometown civic pride and a massive influence on yours truly. Cahill’s contribution to the series, Lost in My Own Backyard, provides a beautifully irreverent glimpse into Yellowstone National Park, since he lives 50 miles away. In the introduction, he writes: “I have not tried to write a guide to the park. Others have done that and done it so well that anything I say would be redundant. . . . I hope my own idiosyncratic little book will spur you to explore the park, to enjoy it and to begin doing your own research into those areas that most enthrall you and charm you.” Cahill explains that Yellowstone was established by an act of Congress I became enamored of the on March 1, 1872, and that it was the world’s first national park, specifically series primarily because the set aside to function “for the benefit only prerequisite is that the and enjoyment of the people.” In writers take their journeys other words, Yellowstone is America’s back yard. Our back yard. It’s bigger on foot. And of course, the than 14 states and only 8,000 square first one I bought was the miles smaller than all of England— one Chuck Palahniuk wrote. thus, a great place to get lost. Throughout the book, Cahill offers advice for wandering on and off the miles of beaten paths in the park. He tells hysterical anecdotes of illiterate tourists trying to take snapshots of their kids standing next to dangerous bison. He riffs on both the geology and the overall ecosystem. Petrified tree trunks, glacial lakes and parsnip jungles populate the narrative. Wolves do battle with coyotes. National and natural history merge into one. In the back of the book, he also incorporates a “Selected Yellowstone Bookshelf,” including Lee H. Whittlesey’s Death in Yellowstone: Accidents and Foolhardiness in the First National Park. The title of that one pretty much says it all. Cahill also includes a few revised and expanded versions of articles he and pal Tom Murphy originally penned for National Geographic Adventure. They both live in the same town, and according to Cahill, Murphy “has an entire room devoted to Yellowstone books, to his wife’s immense annoyance.” Maybe Cahill’s presence can inspire San Joseans to explore their own back alleys and forgotten places. I know I will.

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Tell me about your favorite back yard at SiliconAlleys@metronews.com


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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 MASHUP

[09]

best of the local web

A roundup of news, commentary and opinion from around the valley. Opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect Metro’s editorial views.

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Google Might Be Investing in Electric Cars

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TESLA wants to go public. But the electric car company, loved by California celebrities and nerds alike, had to first bare all to the SEC. So now we know Tesla is funded by a mysterious front company linked to Google.

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Tesla registered with the SEC on Friday. Buried in the copious paperwork is the name of a very interesting “Series C” and “Series E” stockholder: Amphitheatre LLC. We first flagged this entity as a possible Google front when it invested in a zeppelin company started by Google adviser Esther Dyson. Ampitheatre LLC may well have been acquired by Google along with the company INV Tax Group when Google bought its eight-building headquarters in Mountain View. Ampitheatre LLC and INV Tax Group, then believed affiliated with Goldman Sachs, had been the shell companies that held the buildings. It’s hard to imagine why a real estate holding vehicle is now investing in zeppelins and electric cars if it’s not controlled by Google. Google is a logical investor, anyway, since its founders are already Tesla customers and investors. Co-founder Larry Page even reportedly “jet pools” with Tesla CEO Elon Musk, and Google has an “electric car” section reserved in its parking lot. It wouldn’t be the first time Google co-invested with its founders; it followed Brin into his wife’s 23AndMe. Whether the Google honchos had their financial judgment clouded by the fact that they personally made it to the front of Tesla’s fiercely competitive waiting list is something for Google shareholders to decide. In so doing, they might consider another nugget buried in Tesla’s S-1: The company has not yet stabilized its notoriously volatile executive ranks. Among the recent departures is general counsel Jonathan Sobel, formerly of Yahoo. Sobel started in September; he was gone by December. One tipster claims friction with Musk was to blame. The bigger question is whether Musk can forge more stable relationships with his co-workers going forward. Only time will tell. We’ll be watching, and we bet Google will be, too. —RYAN TATE, VALLEYWAG.GAWKER.COM I]^h ^h l]n eZdeaZ i]^c` IZhaV dlcZgh VgZ Vhh]Vih# ÅWbdgZ9A? >c i]Z \gZVi gVXZ id iV`Z dkZg i]Z ldgaY! l]d l^aa l^c444 <dd\aZ4 6eeaZ4 B^Xgdhd[i4 8dbXVÅZgÅMÒ c^in4 HZi] BVX;VgaVcZ444 HiVn ijcZY! [da`h ÅHXVcY^cVk^Vc ;a^X` Cd ldcYZg <dd\aZ X]Vi ]Vh WZZc Vaa hXgZln aViZanÅi]Zn lVci bZ id Wjn dcZ d[ i]ZhZ XVgh hd >Éb [dgXZY id YZa^kZg bn ÆCjii^c bjX]! j4Ç bZhhV\Z ^c eZghdc ÅLdghi# 6h]# :kZg#

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MASHUP FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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Monday Morning Ad Quarterback

No Verizon iPhone Until 2011?

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 NEWS

“Compiled From Notes on Sarah Palin’s Hand.”

Santa Clara Valley, California

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the most fruitful ground (e.g. Michael Jackson’s death, Christian Bale’s famous on-set rant, David Hasselhoff’s drinking), but there is hardly anything that is off-limits, from accidents and natural disasters to celebrities and political figures. What is remarkable though is just how fantastic this all would have seemed in 1999. Sure, 11 years ago we had the Internet, but we were still treating it as little more than a more efficient distribution platform for the existing media. Our essentially “broadcast” approach, with the privileged few sending their rare and valuable content out to the many, was still firmly in place.

1,227,863

$4.3 Billion Decrease

Reed Rips Fong And Coto

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Got a Tip for The Fly? fly@metronews.com

CULTURE MAN!!Mbxsfodf!Mfttjh-!gpvoefs!pg!TubogpseÖt!Dfoufs!gps!Joufsofu!boe!Tpdjfuz-!

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The Read/Write Stuff The rise of Web 2.0 is riding on a wave of content for the people, by the people By Andrew Potter HEN THE Tiger Woods story evolved from one about a sporting hero injured in a late-night car crash to a far more tawdry tale of booze, drugs, porn stars, nudie pics, massive infidelity and millions in hush money, its themes and symbols were instantly appropriated and repurposed for all kinds of popcultural fun. Almost immediately after the story broke, someone produced a picture of Woods and his wife, Elin, standing side by side American Gothic style, with Woods sporting a Photoshopped black eye and broken tooth. Next came the insta-

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computer game, a little bit of Flash animation where the player gets to control Tiger Woods in his Escalade as he runs away from his golf-clubwielding wife. And there are the jokes, the thousands of one-liners dumped onto comment boards from one end of the Internet to the other. All, of course, were widely circulated and linked on Twitter, Facebook and countless blogs. By the current standards of cultural commentary, this is completely unremarkable. Whenever there is breaking news of any sort, it is now standard procedure for the Internet to take control of the story. Tabloid-level scandal provides

30 Million Estimated

400 Million Number

number of adult bloggers in the United States

of active Facebook users

February 10-16, 2010 What changed everything was the development of what has been called Web 2.0, the collection of web-based applications that foster interactivity, modular interoperability and collaboration. These include social networking sites, wikis, aggregators and blogs, along with dozens of other applications that allow people to share and revise content at will. This is what the law professor and copyright reform activist Lawrence Lessig has called a shift from a Read Only (R/O) to a Read/Write (R/W) culture. An R/O culture is characterized by a sharp distinction between producers and consumers and is based on the lecture model of distribution. In contrast, in an R/W culture, the distinction between producers and consumers breaks down, and the culture becomes more like a freewheeling dinner party than a lecture. Crucial to an R/W culture is open access to information that everyone has the ability to not only share but also to manipulate and transform. This is what underwrites the opensource, multiple-drafts, reuse/remix/ recycle media ecosystem we might as well call Culture 2.0. But as Lessig has pointed out, this isn’t so much a new development as a return to a culture that dominated right to the end of the 19th century. Until the arrival of mass media such as radio, television, film and phonographs, American culture was a mongrelized mess of folk traditions driven by freeform borrowing, appropriation and outright copying. And so when we look back over the last century and a bit, the heyday of R/O culture from the 1920s to the 1990s starts to look like an aberration, made possible by a distinct but temporary level of analog technological development. The Culture 2.0 digital revolution is taking us back to a more democratic culture built around creative communities of sharing and collaboration. &'

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[11]

Number of views on YouTube video of Christian Bale’s onset freak-out

in Rupert Murdoch’s net worth from 2008 to 2009


[12]

NEWS FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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What’s Old Is New Again This revolution has had at least three profound effects: First, it catalyzed the Copyright Wars, the decade-long fight over intellectual property that has raged between software developers, record labels and publishers on the one side, and programmers, artists and file sharers on the other. Second, it completely destroyed the business models of old media, in particular newspapers and broadcast television. Third, it has pretty much put the old information gatekeepers out of a job—the producers, editors and journalists whose job descriptions involved managing and constraining the flow of information to the masses. The result is very much like Marx’s famous description of life under capitalism: “All that is solid melts into air, all that is holy is profaned, and man is at last compelled to face with sober senses, his real conditions of life.” Of course in any revolution, the old order never goes down without a fight. Big Copyright continues to manipulate governments into passing draconian intellectual property regimes that suppress the rights of users, while News Corp boss Rupert Murdoch (owner of Fox News and the Wall Street Journal, along with other large properties) has declared war on Google, blaming it for profiting off his products while delivering nothing but empty page views in return. These are little more than the rearguard actions of a doomed ancient regime. The culture has changed from one marked by information scarcity to one of plenitude, and there is no longer value to be had in gatekeeping or rationing. We live now in an attention economy, and the result has been a transfer of power to the masses, who will shop their eyeballs and scarce

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time to the most interesting bidder. While our culture is now “democratic” in the most literal sense of the word, the unanswered question is the effect this will have on the actual institutions of democracy.

In an R/W culture, the distinction between producers and consumers breaks down, and the culture becomes more like a freewheeling dinner party than a lecture Many people are worried that civil discourse will suffer as we retreat into the echo-chambers of the blogosphere, while others are convinced that the demise of print media will lead to unfettered corruption at City Hall and on Capitol Hill. These are not idle worries. If the rise of Culture 2.0 was the most important development of the first decade of this century, making sure we use it to build a properly functioning Democracy 2.0 will be the most pressing task of the second. M

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 SAN JOSE INSIDE

a look inside san jose politics and culture

Dr. Patrick Phu Le Responds Patrick Phu Le

Metro has a newspaper to spread whatever news they want as long as they are in favor of the candidate they support. The fact that proved their one-sided and unfair accusation is they don’t offer me any chances to respond! The truth regarding the airport incident is that I have been exonerated of any wrongdoings by the DA office. My DOJ record is totally clean. The photographer involved was trying to exhort money from me. In a civil lawsuit, his attorney started by demanding millions of dollars of compensation, down to a few hundred thousand dollars, and finally settled with an amount much less than what I would have spent for my lawyer to defend me in court. After a lengthy discussion with my attorney, we come to a conclusion of a settlement because it would be less costly for me than my attorney’s fees and would save my time in court which would prevent me from working. The terms and reasons for settlement should not be disclosed, but the photographer involved, Mr. Tan Nguyen, has been spreading news such as I was guilty in his civil lawsuit. Actually, my lawyer at my request had countersued his newspaper for malice and having disseminated untruthful facts. This played a big role in his decision to settle for mostly the costs he had to pay his attorney. I have been serving the Vietnamese-American community and the community at large long enough for people to judge my character and my dedication to serve. I had been serving and am serving on many boards of directors, both public commissions and private companies, from banks to business corporations. My colleagues always appreciated my contributions and appraised my personal character. The reported incident involving City Planning Director Joseph Horwedel is even more insulting to me. The reality was that the translator from the city staff, Anna Le (coincidentally she is my best friend’s sister), was not able to do her translating job properly because she had problems with the Vietnamese language. Mr. Horwedel asked the meeting participants for a capable person to volunteer, so I accepted. The issue of the meeting with the Planning Department was related to the number of banners and how they were to be displayed on a portion of Story Road between McLaughlin and Senter. Vietnamese-Americans who attended the meeting raised the concerns that the number of banners should be spread out instead of concentrating on the intersections of Story Road with McLaughlin and Senter as proposed by the Planning Department. When I translated what the city was planning to do, there were lot of expressed dissatisfactions from the attendees. People were very noisy. I’d called upon the patience and calmness of participants and told them we could solve nothing with noisy objections but we must work diligently with the city to have things done. Nevertheless, angry people decided to walk out and there was nothing I could do about it. I stayed over with Mr. Horwedel for more than 20 minutes to discuss the issue and recommended that he satisfy the demand of the Vietnamese community since it was not much to ask. Mr. Horwedel thanked me for my effort to call on people to stay calm. Later on I found out that when banners were displayed, they were spread evenly on Story Road as Vietnamese-Americans had asked. Mr. Horwedel and Ms. Le are live witnesses of my sincere efforts and, if necessary, I can request their testimonies and rectifications for what really happened at the aforementioned meeting. I feel obliged to clarify this matter for my friends on Facebook who had contacted me and expressed their concerns. I really appreciate and am deeply grateful to all who contacted me. &*

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FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 SAN JOSE INSIDE

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[16] COVER STORY

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

Reality aali y Santa Clara’s Ashley Lindley of MTV’s The Real World D.C. is a new kind of anti-celebrity. By Jody Amable

C I

T’S DIFFICULT getting into Sabor tonight. The general admission line is long, and many people standing outside are worrying about the dress code after a bouncer fades a guy wearing baggy pants. No one seems to be aware that Ashley Lindley, the localgirl star of MTV’s The Real World: D.C. is set to appear.

A few people mill around on the outdoor patio, and inside is a dark crush of bodies on the dance floor, where girls in very high heels and very short skirts are squealing excitedly. Some of them weave through the crowd carrying glowing green specialty drinks that look like something out of Blade Runner. 18


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 COVER STORY

[17]

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[18] COVER STORY

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

ASHLEY LINDLEY 16 9VkZ 8VWZWZ

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Ashley isn’t drinking tonight. She prefers to be on her game when she’s working. She has become a national sensation, this season’s big thing. The producers have cast her as the Bad Girl (the Bitch), a loose cannon who creates a lot of drama. Since taping of The Real World wrapped in October, she’s been paid by clubs to make appearances like this a few times a week. But at Sabor tonight, she blends right into the crowd after slipping in around 11:30 though the side hallway whose walls have been autographed by previous celebrity guests. She pauses briefly to admire Lady Gaga’s signature. The Real World was a novel television concept when the show premiered in 1992, ushering in the American era of reality TV. Now in its 23rd season, it’s difficult to separate one season from another. Aside from a few variables, it’s consistent: seven strangers picked to live in a house together and have their lives taped. Seven strangers times 23 seasons equals 161 people that have been quarantined for four months at a time in houses all over the world, then rereleased into the real real world. For Ashley, that meant coming back to the South Bay, where she spent her high-school years.

“It freaked me out,” Ashley says after the Sabor appearance, speaking of her transition back to normal life. “I felt like a Kenyan man coming to America for the first time.” She found The Real World experience similarly disorienting. Though there might not have always been a cast mate in the house with her, there was always at least one cameraman, whom cast members aren’t allowed to talk to. “The first time my roommates left me alone in the house, I was a wreck,” she recalls. The cameras were on “all the time, 24/7, even when we’re sleeping. There are cameras in every corner of every part of the house.” she says. “You’re constantly miked from the minute you wake up in the morning until you go to bed. Except when you shower. There’s no camera in the shower, but they’re right outside of the shower.” It doesn’t take long to forget the cameras are there. “For four months, you”re not going to go, oh my god, my grandma’s going to see that. You just forget about it.” 21


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

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FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 COVER STORY

[21]

ASHLEY LINDLEY 18

Ashley lives in the back of a sprawling apartment complex in Santa Clara with her two best friends from Santa Clara High School, where she took honors physics and performing arts classes and was a cheerleader. “I loved Santa Clara High School,â€? she says, her eyes widening. On a recent gray Thursday, all is quiet behind the community’s automated locked gates. There are landscapers roaming the grounds with tools, and two of the ducks that usually congregate in the man-made ponds scattered across the complex have made their way into the community swimming pool. In her apartment, most of the lights are off. Lindley is in her very pink bedroom, getting cleaned up after a morning workout and packing for a trip to Los Angeles to ďŹ lm the after-show for The Real World, a tradition that involves a televised cast reunion, and, she says, “three hours of taping for a half-hour of television.â€? Ashley says she doesn’t really have a hometown. On the show, she admitted to strained relationships with her biological family that left her free to bounce around from the valley to Los Angeles, where she worked at the Disneyland resort and did a test shoot for Playboy magazine, to Houston to live with a boyfriend for three years to D.C. for the show and now back to Santa Clara. Right now, her friends are what matters. “They actually got to me before the show,â€? she says of her roommates, one of whom is sitting in the front room, cursing at the video game he is playing. “Santa Clara is where most of my family is; it’s where my friends are.â€? “I feel comfortable here. I think I’m understood better here. I think I’m very similar to most Nor Cal women. I’m not similar to East Coast women, I can tell you that. I’m proud to be a Bay Area kid.â€? She’s standing in the bathroom, which smells like shampoo and soap and the

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‘It’s not me. It’s the edited version of me.’—ASHLEY LINDLEY In her MTV.com biography, which has been copied and pasted all over the web, Ashley is referred to as “the most politically awareâ€? in the house. “I grew up with a civics teacher,â€? she says of her stepdad. “The only time we really hung out was when he was grading papers.â€? At the dinner table, she was regularly quizzed on presidents and asked to name their contributions to the American political landscape. “Thomas Jefferson was probably my ďŹ rst inspiration, at age nine,â€? she says. “In high school I was the girl who would never come to class and then show up and ace all the tests.â€? And her love of politics persisted. In 2008, Lindley served as an Obama delegate to the Nevada caucuses. “I heard he watched our show,â€? she says about the president, whom she still supports though she thinks the Nobel Peace Prize was a stretch. “Oh my god, I thought, my hero knows that I exist. It was an unbelievable feeling just to know that even for just a second, he saw my face.â€? She says, however, that she has no interest in pursuing a career in politics. “Absolutely not,â€? she says. “I love it too much. I think I would lose my love for it if I did.â€? She once wanted to go to law school but changed her mind after dating a lawyer. The microblogosphere is content in believing Ashley’s a bad person, even though, watching the show, the case against her is weak. She hasn’t physically attacked a housemate. She didn’t get kicked off the show. The worst she did was pilfer a few random items from the set on the last day—a blanket, a door hanger and a plush bald eagle that her roommates’ puppy, Mia, is tussling on the oor with as she packs. In the great pantheon of Real World housemates, she’s tame. However, every story needs a villain. She knew going into it that the show was 25

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burning residue of hair product on a curling iron, with smears of foundation on her face. In person, she’s not mean at all—she’s very well-spoken and looks people straight in the eye when talking, which probably scares less-conďŹ dent folks. She’s tall, slender and striking. She never went to college. And she knows what she’s talking about.

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The show has been running for almost as long as Lindley, 23, has been alive. Now, she’s one in a very long line of pseudocelebrities spawned from the show and the dozens of reality shows that followed—a slew of castoffs wandering California and beyond. Many of them appear not to know what to do with themselves except more TV, taking secondrate roles as they desperately clutch their mini-stardom. Even the winners of shows that promise careers, like America’s Next Top Model and Project Runway, are often launched straight into obscurity after production wraps. Ashley knows she wasn’t a celebrity going in; she says wasn’t a celebrity during taping, and she isn’t one going out. She may be the only reality star to beat the system.

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ASHLEY LINDLEY 21 entertainment, and that around 3,000 hours of her life would be condensed into a few short hours of escapist enjoyment for the world to watch. “It’s not me,” she says. “It’s the edited version of me.” In one celebrated episode, Ashley appears to be hurt and surprised when a roommate she kissed on camera, Mike Manning, hooks up with a guy. “I found out that Mike was bi on the bus. We got into that conversation on the way to the place. I roomed with him on the assumption that he was gay. Everyone assumed that I wanted to be with him,” she says.

‘I’m letting it go. If y’all hate me, y’all hate me. Whatever.I’ll be the coolest bitch you’ve ever met.’ “They didn’t show all of the volunteer work we did. We worked with DC Vote, served food to the homeless and participated in Pinktober to raise breast cancer awareness. No one wants to watch that. It’d probably be pretty boring. They just show when you drink and get angry. “To be perfectly candid, if I watched, I wouldn’t like me either.” The comments on her recent guest blog for the Huffington Post, and on social media sites, are vicious and relentless. “It’s so funny—and I don’t say this to rag on Huffington Post in any way—but when they approached me, I assumed they asked me to write for them because, you know, I’m liberal, I’m politically aware, and I have an opinion,” she says, blending her makeup. “They asked me for topics, and I gave them a list of, like, 20 topics, and the topic they chose was the one about sex.” The lack of opportunity to flex her political muscles only fanned the flames for the trolls. “Oh God, it was awful,” she says, picking up some pink eye shadow out of a box full of brand names. “They say I’m a bitch, I’m stupid, that I should just kill myself and get it over with.” She barely cracks a smile, and shakes her head as she digs around in her makeup box. “You know what? Fine. I’m misunderstood then. At first I got really upset about it. And I cried about it. I was kind of heartbroken. I was like, I don’t want to be the girl that everybody hates. And then I realized, I’m at home. I’m

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surrounded by my friends. I’m surrounded by my family. If everybody hates me, everybody hates me. At the end of the day, what can I do about it? “I’m a control freak. and this is the one thing I can’t control. At some point you just have to let it go. So I’m letting it go. If y’all hate me, y’all hate me. Whatever. I’ll be the coolest bitch you’ve ever met.” “I think people confuse that immaturity for bitchiness. I’m a young person, and sometimes I act immaturely. And I need to learn from that, Most people don’t go through that process of learning with the whole world watching. I am.”

Reality Reality Growing up with a mom who married and divorced twice during her childhood and moved around a lot, Lindley’s upbringing wasn’t of the silver spoon variety. She attended 10 schools before moving out of her home at age16. She says her father, with whom she doesn’t maintain contact, lives in a trailer park in the Nevada desert. Dining before the club appearance at Le

Papillon restaurant, the waiter brings out a bent spoon with crème fraiche and trout roe. As she contemplates how to eat it, she says, “I’ve never tried caviar before, so you can’t make fun of me.” A Twitterholic, she tweets what she ate for dinner from her Android before leaving the restaurant. “I tweet all day,” she says. Living in the District of Columbia as part of a television production is an experience she says she’ll never forget. “I’ve never lived in such a nice place before. Ever. I’ve never seen such a nice house. “I’ve never been to a soccer game and been VIP. I never sat front row at a basketball game. Opportunities don’t happen for people like me that often. Big opportunitites like that. So I don’t take it for granted.” Back at Sabor, the place is so packed, and her VIP table, recessed into the wall, is so snugly fit into the back of the room that no one appears to take notice. She doesn’t have a huge entourage in tow, just a few friends. She isn’t dressed like a star— she wears a simple black dress and black pumps—nor does she carry herself as one.

No one approaches her, though that might be due to the protective rope surrounding her table and the hefty security guard presiding over it. Some event photographers take her picture, and if they recognize her from TV, they certainly don’t let it show. When she’s not living up to her Real World persona, she’s hard to recognize. In real life, she’s more like the pieces of her personality that were left on the cutting room floor. She says she doesn’t regret a thing. “I can say with honesty that The Real World is the best thing I’ve ever done,” she says. Though there are things she can’t say or do, due to a contract she signed that’s “the size of War and Peace,” she’s confident that The Real World accelerated a sea change in her life. “It is true, I used to be mean just to be mean,” she says, shuffling around her room, gathering dirty laundry in a pink hamper to wash at her mom’s house in before she gets on her flight to L.A. in the morning. “It used to be a defense mechanism.” After being picked to live in a house and have her life taped, there’s not much to hide anymore, and not much to be mean about. M


[26] COVER STORY

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

Life’s a Beach

Why I love the party animals of ‘Jersey Shore’

By Jessica Lussenhop

I

T’S A CHILLY Friday night at Pearl in downtown San Jose, and because of the usual politics of club entrances, my photographer and I are being held back in the doorway by a stern but friendly bouncer, as tube dress after tube dress skips past us into the glowing blue bosom of the raucous dance floor. After he hears that we’re there because Ronnie Magro, a cast member of MTV’s wildly popular reality TV series Jersey Shore, is making a San Jose appearance, an onlooker grumbles something to the effect of “Why is that guy even famous?” Fair question. And one I’ve heard repeatedly since the show netted 4.8 million viewers during the season finale—and since I’ve become its No. 1 fan. I. Love. Jersey. Shore. Unironically and wholeheartedly. And after I made the mistake of pretend-exploding my brains after a co-worker confessed he didn’t know what the show was, I was saddled with the dubious task of trying to explain why I think the show is so special. Now, for the uninitiated, Jersey Shore is a reality television series that follows eight housemates for one summer while they share what is known as a “shore house” in the beach town of Seaside Heights. If this sounds like Real World, the granddaddy of modern reality television, it isn’t. While the Real World casts have profiles scrubbed as shiny as graduate school

applications, Jersey Shore has taken a slightly different tack. MTV brought together four loud guys and four louder girls, all from the northeast, all a little worse for wear after years of hard partying, and all unabashedly “guido”—the politically incorrect term for a young person of not necessarily Italian descent that has picked up the modern and more colorful attributes of “representing family, friends, tannin’, gel, everything,” according to cast member Pauly D, who sports a breathtaking example of another “guido” attribute—the blow-out hairstyle. There’s no token black guy or gay boy. It’s all guidos, all the time. What ensues is no less than glorious chaos. The boys brawl, the girls brawl, they hook up, they strike out, they party way too hard and wake up not necessarily knowing exactly what their camera crew has captured. So some of the appeal is obvious—it’s a trainwreck. But I realized there’s more to it than that when I felt my heart actually begin to race during a fight on episode six, “Boardwalk Blowups.” The New Yorker’s television column attempted to explain Jersey Shore this way: “It can give itself a pat on the back for enabling viewers to feel superior to at least eight other people.” And here I must humbly disagree. The times I’ve seen The Bachelor or The Hills, I have absolutely found my ego swelling to tremendous size. But Jersey Shore makes me feel like Diane Fossey. I have no more

in common with these guidos than with a band of orangutans, so I can’t feel superior to them. Rather, I’m content to observe. MTV achieved something special with this cast. This is a collection of young people obsessed with image and with being able to fight and fuck like the best of ’em, but they’re also pretty clueless (except Pauly D, who at 29 is a little more prepped for the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune). When an overly confident cast member nicknamed The Situation loses out on Sammi Sweetheart, the disappointment practically drips down his bulbous nose. When Snooki get shut down time after time by club meatheads, or when Ronnie is provoked into yet another tiff with Sammi, it’s pretty honest television. And there’s something else. What happened in Season 1 happens in shore houses all over New Jersey every single summer. It’s not normal for seven irritatingly beautiful strangers to live in an opulent but ugly house together; it’s not normal to compete in a Hollywood mansion for the affections of a C-rate rock star; but it’s not an accident that Ronnie can find someone to fist fight him around every corner, or that the Situation can find a handful of secondrate sluts to take home every night—this is the friggin Jersey Shore. Now, I don’t want to go overboard here. I realized after the season finale that I don’t know much about the cast. (Are they

students? Do they have jobs?). But the show does a pretty good job of crystallizing a moment in time, a time of Ed Hardy hats, bedazzled tees and binge drinking the summer away. And I’m glad I could witness it from 3,000 miles away. Now, in some ways, I’ve sort of missed the boat here. Jersey Shore’s first season has already ended, and the gaggle of cast members have become household names. This becomes clear at Pearl, where my hopes of actually talking to Ronnie are dashed when I see that he’s been cordoned off in a VIP area of the dance floor and guarded by 6'6" 300-pound mixed martial arts fighter Marcus “The Monster” Royster. Ronnie’s shorter than I thought he’d be and not nearly as swollen-looking as he appeared on-camera, but that hasn’t stopped about 100 girls in 4-inch heels from lining up to have their photo taken with him before they hastily clop offstage. Instead, I watch from the sidelines as he poses for photo after photo, not talking to anyone, and every 10th photo stopping to take a sip of something the color of Red Bull. There’s no fist pumping, there’s no fist fighting. He looks sort of like a caged animal. And that sums up why I’ll probably not be watching Season 2. Who cares if Pauly D or the Situation score anymore? They’re famous. Second, they’re moving Jersey Shore from the Jersey Shore, assured that the cast’s personality transcends location, which I’ll bet it doesn’t. I would argue that they need a new cast of sun-damaged ingénues to populate the shore house and let Season 1 have their own show called something else. But keep Jersey Shore at the Jersey Shore. Finally, I’ll wrap with a futile plea. Don’t make them over. Please. Leave Snooki alone, Inside Edition. Don’t teach her the secrets of invisible makeup. Don’t give J-WOWW the deep conditioning treatment her hair desperately needs. These people are fan-trash-tic living in their blown-out bubble. Don’t contaminate my field of study. M


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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 STYLE

ALL NATURAL!!Mjp!Fwjmp!pxofs!Difszm!Dibqnbo!tjut!bu!ifs!ipnf!tuvejp!jo!Dbnqcfmm/

Olive Oil Surplus

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VERYBODY knows about the health benefits of cooking with olive oil, but what about using it topically? That’s what 8=:GNA 8=6EB6C asked herself one evening at her apartment in Campbell. “I was literally sitting on the couch one night, and I had heard something about olive oil being really good for your skin. So, I got up and got my Trader Joe’s olive oil out of the cupboard, put some lavender in it and put it on my arm,” Chapman says. “I was amazed by how quickly it soaked in, and I was like ‘God, this is great. I can probably do something with this.’” That first discovery inspired Chapman to create her own line of all-natural olive oil body products. Under the name A>D :K>AD (olive oil spelled backward), she now makes by hand custom cuticle creams, sugar body scrubs, bath salts, foot soaks, lip-exfoliating sugars and body oils. Her many bath and body products come in yummy fragrance flavors like lemongrass, vanilla creme, peppermint, rose geranium, sweet orange, bergamot lemon, lavender and chocolate. “What inspires me is putting things on my body that are all natural,” Chapman says. “I eat really well, I [drink] juice every day and try to live a healthy lifestyle. So then to put things on top of my body as well that are natural, that’s what I like.” When not at her day job at the Hotel Los Gatos, Chapman can be found over a double boiler in her apartment’s kitchen. There she revels in mixing jojoba, avocado, sweet almond and, of course, olive oils, with shea butter and other natural ingredients, endeavoring to create just the right new bath and body concoction for Lio Evilo. “I think coming up with the recipes, trial and error, that’s the challenging part, but that’s what I love,” Chapman says. “I mean, I could sit there all day and look up what different things go together and go to the kitchen and try to make it.” Considering that Chapman herself looks notably much younger then her 42 years, there may just be something to the use of olive oil for skin care. In fact, olive oil has been used to moisturize and anoint the skin for thousands of years, dating all the way back to ancient Greece. “I made sure that they’re really light, so you don’t feel greasy,” she explains. “That’s a big part of my research, making sure that nobody’s going to walk around feeling like they just sat in a vat of olive oil.” The only drawback to making and using natural olive oil body-care products is that they have an expiration date, Chapman says. Unlike mainstream lotions and skin potions that use petroleum jelly and other artificial preservatives to keep them fresh for years, Chapman says Lio Evilo products have to be used up within about six months. “I put Vitamin E in them, because that’s a natural preservative, so that helps prolong the process,” she says, “but I try and tell people to keep the container lids on tight, and keep it out of the sun.” To purchase Lio Evilo products, visit Chapman’s online store at www.etsy.com/shop/ lioevilo. Jessica Fromm

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FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

Little Orchard Health Center


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

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FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y


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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 MENU

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[37]

tjmjdpo!wbmmfzĂ–t!hvjef!up!Ă&#x;of!ejojoh Mjwf!Gffe The South Bay shows off its beer and barbecue at Meat the Brewers_42

French Dip Ahead ;Za^eZ 7j^igV\d

Gusto, not caution, is required when sampling the magniďŹ cent, meaty sandwiches at Adamson’s French Dip in Sunnyvale By Stett Holbrook

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F YOU haven’t seen the documentary Sandwiches That You Will Like, you should. The ďŹ lm celebrates classic American sandwiches like lobster rolls from Red’s Eats in Wiscasset, Maine, cheesesteaks from Geno’s in Philadelphia, muffuletta from New Orleans’ Central Grocery and the pastrami sandwiches at Katz’s Deli in New York City. America didn’t invent the sandwich, but we might as well have, given the inďŹ nite variety of creative deliciousness this nation places between two slices of bread. The movie made me proud to be an American. It made me hungry, too. The sandwiches from Adamson’s French Dip weren’t in the movie, since the tiny Sunnyvale restaurant opened just seven months ago, but they deserve a place of honor among the great American sandwiches. Mark my words: This is one of the Bay Area’s top sandwich shops, and it’s about to blow up. There’s already a line out the door for lunch, and owner Greg Adamson has plans to open additional locations to meet the demand. Adamson says he gets franchise offers every day, but he declines them, because he wants to keep the business in the family to control the quality of his

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product, a lesson he says he learned in his father’s Minnesota restaurants starting at age 11. “He taught his children his principles, and I try to apply them here,â€? he says. Years after he worked in his father’s restaurants, Adamson moved to California and later opened a catering company as a side business. The popularity of his sliced roast beef French dip sandwich convinced him that he had a winner. “The lines were so long,â€? he says with his Midwestern earnestness. “I knew we had something.â€? Adamson took his popular sandwich and built a restaurant around it, and Adamson’s French Dip was born. The recipe for the sandwiches is about the same, only instead of cooking over lump charcoal he now uses well-seasoned oak. The menu is simple, with just six sandwiches supplemented with crisp, sea-salt-dusted french fries ($1.95); onion rings ($2.95); spicy, ground beef and bacon-larded Santa Maria–style beans ($2.95); celery-seed-sprinkled coleslaw ($1.50); potato salad ($1.75); milkshakes ($3.95), root beer oats ($3.95) and sundaes ($3.25). The restaurant serves 10 brands of premium root beer ($3.95) in frosty mugs. And beer. That’s it.

The French dip sandwich is something of a relic. You don’t see them much anymore. But try one of Adamson’s expertly crafted sandwiches, and you’ll immediately appreciate the beauty and simplicity of this classic. But he does the classic one better by smoking the top sirloin and roast beef in a custom-built oven. The heavy, black iron doors swing open now and then, offering great views of ame- and smoke-browned meat. The smell of burning oak and sizzling meat, surely one of the world’s most delicious aromas, ďŹ lls the parking lot and seems to pull people in from every direction. Adamson is a man who takes his sandwiches seriously and jealously guards his recipes and techniques. The meat is rubbed with a proprietary spice blend before it goes into the oven. It’s sliced to order for each sandwich and loaded into a superb soft French roll that Adamson has custom baked for the restaurant. Although thin and supple, the roll still holds up to the juicy meat and immersion in the au jus. Adamson won’t reveal the source of the bread. “I’m keeping that on the q.t.â€? As for the au jus, it’s made from meat drippings and secret herbs and spices. It’s like a tiny bowl of French

onion soup, minus the onions. Try a sip right out of the little plastic container. I like the prime rib French dip best ($8.95). The meat is wonderfully tender and made even more so with a dunk in the au jus. The top sirloin is good ($6.95), too, although I encountered stray bits of fat and gristle. But I gladly ate it all. In addition to the French dip sandwiches, Adamson’s serves four barbecue sandwiches. My two favorites are the prime rib ($8.95) and the pork ($6.50). The prime rib incorporates the crispy, caramelized and probably carcinogenic outer layers of the smoked prime rib (called “burnt ends� in barbecue parlance). The meat is sliced thin and anointed with a barbecue sauce that’s a nice blend of brown-sugar sweet and vinegar tart. But so is the pulled pork. A heaping mound of faintly sweet and smoky pork shoulder is shredded and piled between one of those French rolls. The tri-tip sandwich ($6.95) is good, too, but not as distinctive as the prime rib or pulled pork. There’s a chicken sandwich ($6.50), but I didn’t try it. A man can only eat so much, even if we’re talking great American sandwiches.


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FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 DINING GUIDE

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[40]

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

second Annual

Mud Bug Boil and anniversary party

Wednesday, February 17th 5pm - 10pm | $9.99 per person Join us in the Rock Bottom Bier Garten for a party to celebrate our 13th Anniversary and Mardi Gras! Complete with crawďŹ sh, corn on the cobb, potatoes, Andouille sausage, dinner rolls, birthday cake, handcrafted beer, hurricanes and rum runners.

1875 South Bascom In the Pruneyard 408.377.0707


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 DINING GUIDE

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Cellars

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OR VALENTINE’S DAY, you could send your beloved a dozen roses, a box of chocolates or even a shiny diamond ring. But that’s so predictable. Here’s another idea. Soquel’s ED:I>8 8:AA6GH is offering bottles of its premium wine with a custom label featuring a photograph of you and your valentine on it. The year-old winery’s “sweetheartâ€? deal is $45. That buys a personalized bottle of wine and a tasting for two. Additional photo-personalized bottles are $35 each. Each bottle label will also have a love poem written by ?DH:E= C6:<:A:, a partner at the winery with winemaker @6IN ADK:AA. Or you could go big and choose a magnum-size bottle (1.5 liters) to show your love for $75. Wine-club members pay $65. Wines available for Valentine’s weekend include the 2008 Viognier, the 2006 Ballad (a bordeaux blend), the 2004 Cabernet Sauvignon, the 2006 Petite Sirah and the 2003 Reserve Port. Ten dollars gets you a wine tasting paired with a selection of chocolates. You could save the bottle for an anniversary or something, but we’re talking Valentine’s Day here, so you’re better off opening it and letting a romantic evening ow where it will. Email winemaker Lovell a photograph at Kay@poeticcellars.com, and she’ll take it from there. But don’t wait. V-Day is looming. EdZi^X 8ZaaVgh0 *%%% C# GdYZd <jaX] GdVY! HdfjZa0 -(&#)+'#(),-#

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[41]

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Campbell Wine Walk Wednesday (Feb. 10) is Campbell’s L>CI:G L>C: L6A@, a ďŹ rst-ever event aimed at showcasing local wines and Campbell’s downtown scene. Buy a ticket ($25 in advance; $30 at Import Connections, 25 S. Central Ave., the day of the event) and stroll down Campbell Avenue from 6 to 9pm with wine glass in hand and sample wines from several wineries set up at more the 25 Campbell shops. The 9DLCIDLC 86BE7:AA 7JH>C:HH 6HHD8>6I>DC has organized the event. There will also be four locations where participants can take part in a Wine Walk raffle to win prizes from the shops and restaurants involved in the event. Pouring locations will also offer appetizers and live music. Some of the participating wineries include HDA>H L>C:GN! GDJ9>C"HB>I= L>C:GN! 8ADH A68=6C8: L>C:GN! @>G><>C 8:AA6GH and 8DI:G>: 8:AA6GH. Tickets are available at www.downtowncampbell.com. Stett Holbrook (Twitter.com/svdining)

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[42] DINING GUIDE

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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HETHER IT’S deserved or not, the South Bay has always played second ďŹ ddle to San Francisco when it comes to things like restaurants, sports, culture and music. You can add beer to the list as well. San Francisco Beer Week kicked off last week and runs until Feb. 14. As you might gather from the name, there’s a slight San Francisco bias to the event. Even though the South Bay and neighboring Santa Cruz are home to some standout breweries, when people think South Bay, quality beer doesn’t always come to mind. Local brewers, however, aren’t sitting around crying in their beers about that. They’ve taken it upon themselves to showcase their brews and host their own beery event Feb. 13. And while they’re at it, they’re going to serve up some great barbecue and other beerbased, beer-friendly food. They’ve come up with a clever name, too: B:6I I=: 7G:L:GH. “You really don’t have to travel far to enjoy great beer,â€? says co-organizer and San Jose resident E:I:G :HI6C>:A. “There’s a lot of good stuff going on down here.â€? Estaniel is the man behind 7:II:G7::G7AD<#8DB, a blog that celebrates the Bay Area’s craft-beer scene. As a Silicon Valley resident, he was tired of hearing the area referred to as a “beer desertâ€? and decided to do something about it. During the ďŹ rst San Francisco Beer Week last year, Estaniel worked with Sunnyvale’s ;>G:=DJH: 7G:L:GN and brewmaster HI:K: 9DC6=J: to put on a beer and cheese tasting. He and Donahue started talking about what they could do this year, and soon Mountain View’s I>:9 =DJH: brewery became part of the discussion. Interest continued to grow until Estaniel and his beer brethren landed on the idea of Meat the Brewers. “We really want to focus on the local scene and let people know we’re here,â€? says 86GDANC =DE@>CH, marketing and events coordinator for the Tied House Cafe and Brewery. If all goes well, organizers may throw another beer fest this summer. In addition to Firehouse and the Tied House, local breweries at the event will include ;6JAIA>C: 7G:L>C< 8D# (Sunnyvale), 9:K>AÉH 86CNDC 7G:L>C< 8D# (Belmont), GD8@ 7DIIDB 7G:L:GN (Campbell), 7#?#ÉH G:HI6JG6CI 6C9 7G:L:GN (Cupertino), H:67G><=I 7G:L:GN (Santa Cruz), H6CI6 8GJO 6A:LDG@H (Santa Cruz) and JC8DBBDC 7G:L:GH (Santa Cruz). One of the stars of the event is sure to be the 768DC 7GDLC 6A: from Uncommon Brewers. That’s right, the beer is made with bacon. Pork belly to be exact. What could be more ďŹ tting for a beer and meat event than beer made with meat? Food will be provided by :B:G<:C8N 77F! HDCDB6 8=>8@:C 8DDE! IDCN 6A76ÉH and <DJGB:I =6JH HI6J9I, not to mention beer cupcakes from E6HIGN 6 <D"<D. Emergency BBQ pitmaster ?:G:BN HDL:GH is a former brewmaster at several Bay Area brewpubs and brewing companies. Using his beer know-how, he incorporates local brews into his brines and marinades. A DJ from Mix 106.5 will also be on hand to spin “beer musicâ€? tunes. What’s beer music? Hopkins says it’s “party music.â€? Works for me. Local beer. Good food. Beer music. What’s not to like? Stett Holbrook (Twitter.com/SVDining)

MEAT THE BREWERS takes place Saturday (Feb. 13), 1–5pm at the Tied House Production Facility, 1627 Seventh St., San Jose. The beer and food tasting is $35. Designated drivers get in and eat for $20. For more information, go to betterbeerblog.com or call 650.965.2739. >[ ndj a^`Z ^i he^Xn! i]Z g^WWdc d[ h]ViiV ]di hVjXZ YZa^kZgh V WaVhi d[ X]^aZ eZeeZg ]ZVi# &%Vb"./(%eb YV^an# &&-* A^cXdac 6kZ# )%-#..(#-+(+#

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

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[44] DINING GUIDE

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

J. Lohr Vineyards & Wines

A Wine and Chocolate Affair Featuring fair trade, organic Chocolate from Snake & Butterfly paired with six J. Lohr wines. Saturday, February 13th – 7:30PM $10.00 per person

IIllustration/Branding: llustration/Branding: R Ranch7.com anch7.com

For more information and reservations contact sjevents@jlohr.com or call 408-918-2160

bite club eats

J. LOHR SAN JOSE WINE CENTER

1000 Lenzen Avenue San Jose, 95126

JLOHR.COM

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[46]

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 DINING GUIDE

EjofsĂ– hvjeft

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CHEF’S CORNER

Scott Cooper ECENTLY, I spoke to Scott Cooper, executive chef at Le Papillon in San Jose, about some of his tips and favorite tastes.

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What inspires you as a chef?

I ďŹ nd inspiration in wide variety of things. It can be a run through the hills and noticing the wild vegetation, to a conversation with one of my staff members about a dish they once had, or just trying to come up with something to match a particular wine; but what I ďŹ nd most inspiring is the ingredients themselves. When I look at a particular ingredient, whether it is a great tomato, a perfect apricot or fresh local squid, is when it is easiest to be inspired. What’s on the menu now that you’re particularly excited about?

We just put an American Wagyu tri-tip on the tasting menu that I really love. It is from a new producer in Missouri, and they are producing some great beef. We cook the tri-tip sousvide for 28 hours and then sear it off and serve it with black garlic jus and fondant sweet potatoes. I was born in Santa Maria, so tri-tip is close to my heart. What ingredient could you not live without?

Soy sauce. Where do you eat on your days off?

Ramen Halu! What would your last meal be?

It would start with sashimi and a little caviar, deďŹ nitely including some uni and uke. Then I would have some roast squab, braised pork belly with root vegetables and ďŹ nish off with cheese and a little dessert. And since it is my last meal, I would have a vintage Krug Champagne and a 1990 Hermitage, Le Pavillon from Chapoutier. Stett Holbrook

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[47]

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[48] DINING GUIDE

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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AN JOSE’S E&O aims to please the masses but still keeps it real. The banh mi ($10) is at-out delicious, even if the spicy mayonnaise was applied a little too thickly. While it costs about ďŹ ve times more than the typical mom-and-pop strip-mall banh mi joint with which Silicon Valley is so very blessed, it earned its keep with the inclusion of Niman Ranch pork, tangy pickles and a loaf of crusty but soft bread that beats out many of the baguettes served at lower market places. Usually when I eat a banh mi sandwich I try not to think about the factory-farmed meat between the bread, but that’s not a problem here. E&O gets points for including humanely raised meat and locally sourced, sustainably farmed produce on some dishes. Green papaya salads are standard fare at Vietnamese and Thai restaurants, but E&O’s Burmese ginger ($10) salad more than held its own. It’s made with crunchy green papaya, toasted coconut and Napa cabbage and tossed with a zingy lemon vinaigrette. I loved the little supercrunchy peanuts sprinkled on top, too. And I have nothing but praise for the hakka eggplant ($5), an easy-to-miss side dish of meaty, braised eggplant that stops just short of being too oily. Desserts are less than great.

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

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Streetlight Str eetlight Records Records

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255 Almaden Almaden Blvd, Blvd, San San Jose Jose

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Allendale Ave, Saratoga 119655 9655 A llendale A ve, S aratoga

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$10 Thu – 9pm; $1 0

Thu – 7:30pm; 7:30 0pm; $27-$57 $27 7--$5 57

Feb. $20, workshops $25 F eb. 12-15; 12-15; concerts concerts $ 20, w orkshops $ 25

Fri F ri – 6pm; $10/$12 $10/$12

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 CALENDAR

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David Knight Borders Oakridge Mall 925 Blossom Hill Rd, San Jose 408.363.6900 Fri – 7pm; free

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Dave Gonzales Band J.J.’s Blues 3439 Stevens Creek Blvd, San Jose 408.243.6441 Sat – 9pm; $10

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Over the Falls

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Mission Chamber Orchestra

Sat – 10pm; free

Le Petit Trianon

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72 N. Fifth St, San Jose

Caravan Lounge 98 S. Almaden Ave, San Jose

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408.236.3350 Sun – 7:30pm; $7-$22

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[52]

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

“OVO is a remarkable and welcome return of Cirque to the Bay Area, and maintains the company’s high standards of quality.” – Mercury News

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 ARTS

Bsut

[53]

METROGUIDE

Gjmn Cinequest ďŹ lm ‘Hell Is Other People’ studies the loser lifestyle_60

Playing Footsie The ‘cuddle party’ phenomenon leaves our writer alone in a crowd By Dani Burlison

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DON’T KNOW if they have Valium at Target, but I will check,â€? read the text message. My friend Skye was at the store in search of a matching set of footie pajamas for us. “This is it,â€? I thought to myself as beads of sweat formed across my forehead. “We are actually going to a fucking cuddle party.â€? I ďŹ rst heard of cuddle parties from a friend who planned one as her divorce steadily approached ďŹ nalization. “Apparently, it is a safe place to explore nonsexual touch,â€? she told me optimistically. I found myself both intrigued and curiously disgusted as she explained the concept: A group of strangers come together in a safe space to give and receive affection. Perhaps this could be the next step in my life as an armchair anthropologist, a practice in furthering my experience in ďŹ eld research and an opportunity to test my own boundaries and practice saying “no.â€? Stepping into an environment so far out of my comfort zone that I might as well be visiting Pluto was both intriguing and horrifying. I needed some reassurance.

The information on the front page of the cuddleparty.com website is straightforward and nonthreatening. Yet, I couldn’t erase the visions in my mind of middle-aged ponytailed dudes cruising for young, pretty, affirmation-thumping New Age women. As I poked around the Internet, however, photos of past parties, revealing bare arms intertwining indistinguishably in a sea of annel-pajama bottoms and overstuffed pillows, tapped into a deep fear inside of me. Thoughts of germs and cold clammy hands running lightly across my back while moaning and sighing mixed with enchanted dolphin music invoked visions of what I imagined would be not unlike an unwilling visit to a couple’s tantra retreat. My blood pressure rose. I laughed nervously. I decided that I needed to go and see for myself.

Head to Toe As we drove the streets of San Francisco, Skye already sporting his completely awesome glow-in-thedark footie pajamas, I prayed that we

would be lost for so long that they would not admit our late arrival. Being one of the most grounded and open-minded of my friends, Skye was there to calm my nerves and talk me down from the extreme anxiety I was experiencing. “I bet you 20 bucks that there are silk scarves and batik sarongs on the ceiling,â€? I giggled to him as we arrived at our destination. We climbed the stairs and I took one last deep breath before marching up to introduce ourselves in the futon-ďŹ lled room and pay the $30-per-person entrance fee. I looked up. Scarves and sarongs draped the ceiling. As I slunk down the dark hallway to change into my pajamas, a tall, lanky man, dressed in a purple satin wrap-around blouse, white shortshorts and purple opaque tights approached me. He stood against my slight frame with his hand on his hip and asked if this was my ďŹ rst cuddle party. “Do you get an edge from this kind of thing?â€? he asked. “I mean, like, do you really get an edge from this?â€? I replied that it was my ďŹ rst cuddle party, embarrassed to admit

that I had no idea what edge meant. We chatted for a few minutes and I decided that this guy, who was amboyantly gay and presumably not interested in women and therefore nonthreatening, would be my new pal; my Safe Buddy, so to speak. A sigh of relief escaped while imagining my new friend and me sitting back and chatting about the silliness of the whole situation. I slipped into the bathroom and emerged a new woman—Dani, Champion of the Cuddle Party— dressed quite literally from head to toe in a set of boy’s dark blue footie pajamas, decorated with rocket ships and glow-in-the-dark stars. Skye and I matched perfectly, and as we entered the cuddle room we were happily greeted by 20 other guests who were sitting haphazardly in a circle on a makeshift, pillow-laden bed.

Cape and Shield We began with introductions and a brief history of cuddle parties before continuing on to rules. Despite my original assumption that cuddle parties arose from a West *)


[54] ARTS

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

Mission Chamber Orchestra Valentine’s Concert

Diamonds and Dreams Emily Ray, Conductor & Ashu, saxophonist

Sunday, Feb 14, 7:30 PM Le Petit Trianon Theatre 72 N. 5th St, downtown San Jose Tickets: $22/18/7 408 236-3350 on-line: www.missionchamber.org

Mission City Opera

La Boheme

Friday, Feb 19 & 26, 8 PM Sunday, Feb 21 & 28, 3 PM Mission City CPA 3250 Monroe St, Santa Clara Tickets: $51/43/31/19 408 749-7607 on-line: www.missioncityopera.org

Palo Alto Philharmonic Orchestra Concert III Daniel Glover, pianist

Saturday, Feb 20, 8 PM Cubberley Theatre 4000 Middlefield Rd, Palo Alto Tickets: $18/15/8 www.paphil.org

South Bay Guitar Society presents Gabriel Bianco solo guitar concert

Saturday, Feb 13, 8 PM Historic Hoover Theatre 1635 Park Ave, San Jose Tix: $20/15 on-line: www.sbgs.org or call 408 292-0704

Discover the Arts www.svArts.org

Post your event ... for free!

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Coast commune after residents ingested one too many psychedelic mushroom caps, the parties actually originated on the East Coast. Founded in 2004 in New York by relationship coaches Reid Mihalko and Marcia Baczynski as a place for people of all genders and walks of life to explore touch in a safe, sober and structured environment, cuddle parties have gained popularity around the globe. There are several rules: keep clothing on at all times, be completely alcohol- and drug-free and only make physical contact after receiving a verbal “yes” to a specific and clear request to touch. There are also “Cuddle Lifeguards,” trained co-facilitators placed on-site to ensure that everyone is comfortable and safe. After recovering from the shock of discovering that kissing, groping and erections were all acceptable at the party, we quickly moved on to boundary-setting exercises that revived my confidence and led me to practice giving an abundance of verbal “nos.” I proceeded to glide back and forth through the crowded room in my celestial jammies, repeating “no” over and over to nearly everyone in the room and their requests to touch, kiss or otherwise fondle me. I felt empowered, like I was sporting an invisible cape and shield to deflect any unwanted advances with pride and dignity.

Cuddle Puddle I have had my fair share of physical and emotional intimacy. I have stumbled into intriguing and boundary-testing situations in places like Burning Man, yoga retreats, cocktail parties and even once at a Super Bowl party in my own living room. I have been strewn across a mattress in the “chill room” of a 1990s rave with complete strangers massaging my every muscle while I puffed away on menthol cigarettes. What sets these incidents apart from the format of a cuddle party is the lack of expectation, formal structure and, of course, the buffer of controlled substances. Entirely sober and surrounded by strangers, I had no way of knowing if the generous offers of handholding held deeper intentions. I made for the bathroom, tripping over a penis pillow on my way and rummaging through my bag for the last time in hopes of discovering one last overlooked Xanax before I sucked it up, accepted my fate and returned to poor, dear Skye, who had managed to cram his body—in full fetal position—into the smallest corner of the room. If my body language was saying “Please don’t touch me,” Skye’s read more like a serial killer ready to pull a chain saw on the first person to even look at him. His open mind seemed to have gone on strike as I squeezed into the corner with him, observing the active and diverse scene. Young polyamorous couples took turns caressing the hair of those next to them. A middle-aged, 6-foot-tall transgendered

woman tangled herself up in the arms of a young, attractive South Asian immigrant man whose hands were groping the breasts of a thirtysomething yoga instructor. And just when I grew comfortable enough to accept an offer of a foot rub from a married cuddle party frequenter, I noticed my Safe Buddy, Mr. Purple Pants, groping and grinding a woman while they twisted their tongues in a fit of exhibitionist passion. (Apparently, I missed the “rule” stating that kissing, frottage and rubbing genitals are not sexual touch.) One of the rules did mention that attendees could get up and walk out at any time, but I was honestly too worried about calling attention to myself. I suddenly felt old-fashioned, boring and old. I just couldn’t let go of my inhibitions like everyone else in the room. I felt an almost palpable wall building itself up around me as the partygoers continued to push their boundaries by allowing strangers’ hands to wander and rub and caress in the most interesting ways. I was freaked and continued to nervously laugh and chat with anyone in the room who looked as horrified as I until an announcement came that the party was winding down. The facilitator invited everyone to join in for one last hurrah by piling up into a giant “cuddle puddle” for the remaining 20 minutes of the party. As Skye stood, paralyzed by the scene that played out before him, I made one last-ditch effort to open my mind. I crawled around the circle and was invited to lay my head on the shoulder of the young South Asian man in the genderbending three-way. I accepted and placed my head on his shoulder with my entire body on the outside of the circle, cold and constricted like an armadillo under attack. I attempted to relax into the moment. I failed. As we laughed and recapped the experience on our drive home, I realized that I had learned something fairly valuable during that party. While cuddle parties certainly provide the benefits of physical touch for those who may not regularly have access to affection for various reasons, I felt that this particular party was no more a practice in intimacy than the husband who refuses to be affectionate or sexual with his wife yet forks over cash for sex or is otherwise promiscuous with strangers. The experience also confirmed in me that when it comes to affection and intimacy, I am indeed old-fashioned. I desire that sense of safety and closeness that comes from sustained relationships built on trust. And I will certainly never be attending a cuddle party again—at least, not without some hand-sanitizer and Valium on hand. THE WINTER WARMTH CUDDLE PARTY, the next and nearest Cuddle Party, takes place Sunday, Feb. 28, at 2:30pm in Santa Clara. $40 individual/$30 each for two. To learn more visit www.cuddleparty.com.

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 STAGE/ART/LIT

[55]

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A Fine ‘Figaro’ Opera San Jose entertained a large crowd of its own on Super Bowl Sunday

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LARGE and most welcome turnout attended the opening weekend of Opera San Jose’s new Marriage of Figaro—so enthused general director Irene Dalis, who has seen openings this season with slimmer crowds. General manager Larry Hancock, meanwhile, was oblivious of Sunday’s competing Super Bowl until one patron asked if he would be posting the score along with the opera’s supertitles. Anyone without a nose for what goes on behind the scenes at the opera might miss the “play within a playâ€? dynamics here (such as famously codiďŹ ed in I Pagliacci). If the Count Almaviva decides to invoke the odious aristocratic “privilegeâ€? of sleeping with Susanna, his wife’s serving girl, on her wedding night, her espoused Figaro is determined to thwart him through no end of masquerades, disguises and staged traps. To Lorenzo da Ponte’s brilliant libretto, cobbled from the Beaumarchais comedy, Mozart came up with music as quicksilver as all the affects implied by the words. These range from motorized patter ensembles—that would be reborn in Rossini and, later still, Gilbert and Sullivan—to the countess’ poignant angst over her husband’s philandering ways and her own further humiliation at seeking redress with the help of her servants. To its credit, Opera San Jose’s artistic management and stage directors consistently exploit the comedy of the comedies they stage. In Act 1, Figaro fashions a puppet effigy of his master from a bed quilt, the better to focus his own jealousy. When the chorus sings the count’s praises they throw their bouquets onto his lap with unconcealed disdain. When he and the conniving Basilio seek to revive the fainting Susanna, they both wind up pawing her bosom. All of this shtick is calculated to arouse laughter in the galleries and does so without fail every time. Isaiah Musik-Ayala’s Figaro (the roles are double cast) anchored the vocal complement with room-ďŹ lling bass-baritone, reďŹ ned stage presence and consistent character. In her second role with OSJ, Jennie Litster’s Susanna set high standards for nuanced vocal production and comedic timing—likewise Tori Grayum as the bumbling Cherubino. Seasoned baritone Daniel Cilli’s count strutted and posed like a rooster but acted a stiffer and less convincing case as seducer and, ultimately, apologetic husband. Rebecca Schuessler’s countess opened Act 2 with a dull “Porgi amor,â€? vocally covered and wanting consonants, then warmed up remarkably and, by “Dove sono,â€? left a lasting impression. (As with Don Ottavio in Don Giovanni, Mozart seeks to rescue such “peripheralâ€? principal roles with gorgeous tunes.) This Figaro recalls the production that opened OSJ’s ďŹ rst season at the California Theatre, back in 2004. Conductor David Rohrbaugh was on the podium then as now, as were many in the orchestra. In some of the patter ensembles, conductor and singers got out of sync, a condition that will no doubt correct in subsequent performances. Larry Hancock’s in-house set designs, spare but functional, and blocking by stage director Peter Kozma, clashed with David Lee Cuthbert’s lighting design, distracting attention by casting odd shadows and tinting one singer’s face blue while another appeared orange at the same time. A choreographic detail in Act 3 offered a rare reminder of the Spanish setting for this imperishable farce. Now, if only OSJ could stage its latter-day descendent, Der Rosenkavalier. Scott MacClelland THE MARRIAGE OF FIGARO, an Opera San Jose production, plays Feb. 11, 13, 16 and 19 at 8pm and Feb. 14 and 21 at 3pm at the California Theatre, 345 S. First St., San Jose. Tickets are $51–$91. (408.437.4450)


[56] STAGE/ART/LIT

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Living in Space Open through May 9, 2010

Immerse yourself in this unique space environment and learn about a day in the life of an International Space Station crew member. It’s out-of-this-world!

NEW!

Living in Space was designed and built by The Children’s Museum of Memphis for the Youth Museum Exhibit Collaborative (YMEC).

Biking in the City Monday, February 15 through Friday, February 19 Join us for a fun-filled week geared to get you on your bike and on the road!

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 STAGE/ART/LIT

OPERA REVIEW

[57]

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ART PREVIEW

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Second Chances

Tabard Theatre revives James M. Barrie’s comedy ‘Hold On to Love’ F YOU COULD go back and do it all over again, would you? The unsuspecting characters in James M. Barrie’s Hold On to Love are given the chance to redo their mundane lives. Barrie’s original title was Dear Brutus. The Tabard Theatre Company has modernized it a little bit, saying it speaks better to this generation. The play, running at the Theatre on San Pedro Square, is a jovial fantasy, perfect for a family environment. Barrie, who is best known for Peter Pan, sets the three-act play in England in 1919 on Midsummer’s Eve. Lob (pronounced “lobe,” which is ironic, considering his behavior) is an eccentric childlike man who has invited some guests to his house because they all have one thing in common: their lives are terrible. The women are catty and dimwitted; the men, boorish and conniving. Lob tells them a tale of a strange wooded area that appears only on Midsummer’s Eve. No one is quite sure what happens to folks when they enter the mysterious wood because no one ever comes out. But the one sure thing is the opportunity to experience their lives if they had made different decisions. Whether the turnout is for the better or worse is undetermined. The wood appears in Lob’s garden, and the guests jump at the once-in-a-dreary-lifetime chance. Andrew Ceglio plays Lob and steals the small scenes he’s actually in. There’s a great deal of mystery about who Lob is, because apparently this isn’t the first time he has invited people to his house and sent them off into the wood. Dirk Leatherman also shines as Mr. Dearth, the drunk artist who could’ve been so much more. His wife, played by Leslie Hardy, takes bitch to a whole new level of superb acting. In all honesty, the whole cast was entertaining. Even though this play is billed as a comedy, I did walk out with a sense that I don’t want my own life to end up like any of these people. It just goes to show life is truly what we make of it.

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Beau Dowling HOLD ON TO LOVE, a Tabard Theatre Production, plays Thursday–Friday at 8pm, Saturday at 3 and 8pm and Sunday at 2pm through Feb. 20 at Theatre on San Pedro Square, 29 N. San Pedro St., San Jose. Tickets are $10-$24. (800.838.3006)

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Cultural Visions

Two artists approach their themes from allegorical and abstract perspectives in new MACLA show ISITING LARGE MUSEUMS and galleries can sometimes be daunting. There’s so much ground to cover, wandering around in rooms filled with paintings and artifacts, floors of sculptures and statues. I sometimes feel rushed, anxious, unsatisfied, having convinced myself that if I don’t move quickly enough I might not get to see it all. My mind didn’t run that gauntlet while I was at MACLA viewing a small two-person exhibit titled “Conceptual Landscapes: Recent Work by Castillo and Mariana Garibay.” Located at the edge of downtown San Jose, MACLA has its roots in the Latino community but also fosters cultural interdependence embracing the diversity of the city to which it belongs. Castillo has focused her installation on symbolism as it relates to history and culture. In her interpretation on the common theme of suffrage, Castillo has created Brown Sugar, a series of the logoed burlap sacks stretched ceiling to floor supported by chain links to represent “a sugar cane field suspended by chains yet anchored by its own weight.” She has screen-printed the sacks with a fictitious sugar-cane company logo. Her piece targets capitalism and its relationship to the exploitation of individuals who worked the fields during the sugar trade. Paired with this sculpture is a photo component in which Castillo models various poses to establish the depiction of a sugar-cane field while honoring the silent role women played during this part of history. What parts are meant to embody the spirit of the farmworkers, the essence of their struggle or the effects of the sugar trade is not easily discerned. The human element never gels, making it difficult to complete the personal connection between the art and the viewer. The second half of the exhibit is dedicated to Mariana Garibay, a Bay Area artist. Sprouting from the seeds of abstraction, Garibay separates from the realism of her counterpart by playfully manipulating the imagination with vibrant colors and a multitude of mediums. Strolling among titles like Mr. Long Arms and Fabulous Pink, Lingering Murmur and Another Place, I truly felt as if I was in another place. From the traditional basics of wood, watercolor and paint to the not-so-common rudiments of yarn, string and bobby pins, Garibay changes the space around her to fit the world and how she sees it.

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Angelo Scrofani CONCEPTUAL LANDSCAPES runs through March 13 at MACLA, 510 S. First St., San Jose. There will be an Artists’ Talk on Friday (March 5) at 7:30pm. (408.998.ARTE)


[58] STAGE/ART/LIT

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

VALENTINE’S PREVIEW

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

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UPCOMING EVENTS AT MONTALVO

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An Evening with Bob James :: Feb 25, 7:30 pm :: $35/30, Members $31/27 Grammy-winning pianist with more than 30 solo albums. Founder of the jazz ensemble Fourplay. P E R F O R M I N G A RT S S E A S O N

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“...his many years of dedication to smooth sounds and rhythms have not diminished his inventiveness or his sense of swing...� - Los Angeles Times

Acoustic Alchemy :: Feb 28, 7:30 pm :: $35/30, Members $31/27 Grammy-nominated British smooth jazz ensemble is a powerhouse force in contemporary jazz. Recognizing Acoustic Alchemy’s outstanding musicianship, All About Jazz writes ...â€?RedeďŹ ning the rules is what Acoustic Alchemy does best.â€?

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World-renowned South African singer/ songwriter Mahlasela (a.k.a. “The Voiceâ€?) performs songs of deďŹ ance, hope, and joy. “His performances are optimistic and soulful, delivered with an intensity that captures the attention and embraces the heart.â€? — LA Times

“A tender and moving comedydrama.� — The New York Times Children’s theater, Bollywood-style: Live music, singing, and dancing transform an acclaimed children’s book into an hour-long stage spectacular for the whole family. Recommended for ages 6 & up.

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Ladysmith Black Mambazo :: Mar 10, 7:30 pm :: $50/45, Members $45/40 The legendary South African vocal ensemble, performing for more than 40 years, won a 2009 Grammy for “Ilembe: Honoring Shaka Zulu.� “It isn’t merely the grace and power of their dancing or the beauty of their singing that rivets the attention, but the sheer joy and love that emanates from their being.� - Paul Simon

Women of the Blues: A Tribute to Koko Taylor :: Mar 19, 8 pm :: $32/27, Members $29/24 A tribute to the late Grammy-winning blues genius Koko Taylor presented by J.C. Smith featuring Sista Monica Parker, Pat Wilder & Sharon Lewis.

All events at the Carriage House Theatre

Tickets: Montalvo Box OfďŹ ce 408.961.5858 M-F, 10am-4pm or ticketmaster.com :: montalvoarts.org

JOIN NOW :: montalvoarts.org/membership


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FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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A Bum’s Life

Cinequest feature ‘Hell Is Other People’ salutes a very different kind of American cultural hero By Richard von Busack

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HE FIRST SIGN of wakefulness, as Morty (Richard Johnson) stirs in his bed, is a fart. Tottering into his kitchen, the pudgy, bearded Morty makes himself a breakfast of champions, composed of Blast energy drink and a bong load. He cleans the marijuana on a self-help book that his slidingscale psychologist sold him. As he slouches around, Morty wears a blue T-shirt, a souvenir of Red Bank, N.J.—an inside-baseball joke for people who found similarities between the work of Red Bank’s Kevin Smith and the work of Jarrod Whaley, director of Hell Is Other People, one of the more intriguing offerings at this year’s Cinequest. Morty starts his day, sort of, circling some jobs ads in the Pennysaver with a felt pen and then getting his hair cut off, presumably to make himself look more professional. On his gently conniving errands, Morty bounces off several women, a la Vincent Gallo’s The Brown Bunny. First, he interviews for a handyman job with Elizabeth, a cracked performance artist. Her latest gift to the world of art is a bulimia piece with lots of public vomiting. On the way home, Morty rings up his ex-girlfriend’s pal Andie (Rebecca Allen) for an emergency meeting. Morty wants to mulct money out of Andie for some vague services rendered. At an imperceptible point in the

conversation—maybe it’s when Morty realizes he’s not going to get any bucks—it turns into a blatant request for a date. Andie happily ferries the news of this attempted pickup right back to her pal, Morty’s off-again, off-again-again ex-girlfriend Emmy (Mary Beth Stevens). Before Emmy can digest the info, Morty has moved on to a newer, sadder scam: trying to pass himself off as a psychological counselor (for pay) to his half-bright musician buddy Ryan (Jonathan Nichols). How much autobiography is there in this Chattanooga-set tale of traveling woe? Surely, if Whaley were as big a loser as Morty, he never would have gotten Hell Is Other People made. The title reference to Sartre is strange, since Morty makes his own hell: “He’s kind of doing his own thing. Whatever that is,” Emmy suggests. It’s interesting to watch the film’s gears shift as Emmy takes over the story. She seems an unlikely protagonist. She’s reticent, she’s not a smiler and she has a tough, maybe Texan, voice. I dug her. First, because she’s over Morty; second, because she won’t gossip about what she saw in Morty in the first place; third, because she wears chartreuse socks. And finally, to make a point that’s completely useless to the reader, I was involved with someone who looked very much like Emmy. Moreover, the woman in question used to ask me the same

question Emmy asks Morty, when I was in just such an unforgivably pusillanimous stage of life: “What the hell is your problem?” Emmy practices and repractices a minor-chord waltz on an electric keyboard, misses notes and starts again; in a later scene, we see that she is getting better at the piano. It’s a small triumph in a movie that’s all about the Big Fail. And we can contrast Emmy’s successful practicing with the fraud Elizabeth. Apparently believing herself to be a master of all arts, Elizabeth tries to teach herself “Tennessee Stud” on a banjo—she calls the banjo a guitar. There are problems with some of the performances (though never Stevens’ performance, mind you). Some of the semi-improvised conversations look like they could have used more run-throughs, more conviction. Sometimes, the dialogues are more about the words than the visuals, as in a Mike Nichols movie. Generally, the visuals lure us in. Chattanooga, Tenn., is mostly virgin territory, and the rain clouds match the film’s mood, along with the depression of half-empty streets (it looks as if much of the population of Chattanooga just up and left town). Hell Is Other People functions as a seeming farewell to a place where the vistas aren’t as large as they might be. That’s the case even at the top of Chattanooga’s famous Lookout Mountain, where Morty goes during a sulky, cloud-capped

day of 10-foot visibility. And the camera lingers on the sunlight teasing Angie’s large, round filigreed earrings. Whaley is clearly a funny writer. The most strictly humorous episodes have Morty hanging out with a dolt, likely because the dolt owns a TV and a VCR, and Morty doesn’t. Morty is smart enough to rent The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari. He’s also dumb enough to show it to this redneck buddy, who comments, “This is what you take a girl to see when you don’t want to date her anymore.” There’s an acuteness to this home-brewed movie that contrasts nicely with the sheepishness of Morty. Although he is not mean, this shambling boy-man possesses a wily streak. He shows off a humiliating yet really clever method of dodging a bill that was a new one on me, and I didn’t think I could learn any new ones. One thing I like about the year 2010 is that it’s potentially a heyday for the kind of movies that celebrate what Leslie Fielder called “The Bum as American Cultural Hero.” The mainspring-free life—demonstrated so memorably by Morty—is perfect for an economy that has let so many millions know that their services will no longer be needed. HELL IS OTHER PEOPLE (Unrated; 75 min.), directed and written by Jarrod Whaley, shows Feb. 27 and March 3 at Cinequest in San Jose.

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Reviews by Michael S. Gant and Richard von Busack.

New Dear John (PG-13; 105 min.) See review on page 62. Hell Is Other People (Unrated) See story on page 60. Percy Jackson and the Olympians (PG; 119 min.) A fantasy adventure about a young man caught up in the war between the gods of ancient Greece. Starings Logan Lerman, Uma Thurman and Pierce Brosnan. (Opens Feb 12.) St. John of Las Vegas (R; 85 min.) Steve Buscemi stars in a story about an ex-gambler indulging his vice one more time. (Opens Feb 12 at CinĂŠArts Santana Row.) Valentine’s Day (PG-13; 125 min.) The holiday holds both promise and punishment for a variety of singles and couples in Garry Marshall’s new ďŹ lm. Stars Kathy Bates, Jessica Alba and Biel, Eric Dane, Patrick Dempsey, Jamie Foxx, Jennifer Garner and Julia Roberts. (Opens Feb 12.) The Wolfman (R; 125 min.) Benicio Del Toro gets real hairy, real fast. Also stars Anthony Hopkins and Emily Blunt. (Opens Feb 12.)

Revivals Niles Film Museum Regularly scheduled programs of silent ďŹ lms. Feb 12-14: Mid-Winter 2010 Comedy Festival. Feb 12: All-Talkies night featuring the later work of silent comedy wizards: Grand Slam Opera (1936) with Buster Keaton; Cold Turkey (1940) with Harry Langdon; Honk Your Horn (1930) with Lloyd Hamilton; The Heckler (1940) with Charley Chase; and 1929’s Perfect Day with Laurel and Hardy. Feb 13: three separate-admission programs: 1pm, a program of silents, 191629, with Snub Pollard, Alice Howell and the Hallroom Boys. 4pm: Buster Keaton in Daydreams (1922) and shorts by Harry Langdon and Raymond GrifďŹ th. 7pm: Hal Roach Silents: 6 by Roach Studios with Phil Carli at the piano. Feb 14, 1pm: Four with Lupino Lane, Laurel and Hardy, Our Gang and Mabel Normand; 4pm: a second series of talkies with the deliciously titled Strange Intertube (1932) with the Taxi Boys; Thelma “Hot Toddyâ€? Todd and Zasu Pitts in Red Noses (1932), Chickens Come Home (1931) with Laurel and Hardy, others. All-fest past $39 for members, $49 nonmembers. (Plays Feb 12-14 in Fremont at the Edison Theater, 37417 Niles Blvd.) (RvB)

Reviews Avatar (PG-13; 162 min.) A victory for people who insist that science ďŹ ction has to be dumb. In the future, Earthling mercenaries are shipped to the planet Pandora, where 9foot-tall, blue-skinned noble savages called Na’vi live in a phosphorescent forest full of saurian beasts. Jake (Sam Worthington) is the paraplegic brother of a dead soldier hooked up to a Na’vi shell; the program is under the direction of a chain-smoking biologist (Sigourney Weaver). While it is a maxim of screenwriting that the plot ought to be the longest distance between two points, James Cameron’s terrible script for this putative end-of-the-decade experience really overworks the principle. The politics play it both ways; letting us swoon over the military hardware and still lament for the plundered forests. After an hour, the drugs wear off, and the appeal of synthespianism starts to drag; motion capture isn’t exactly motion release (compare the synthetic Weaver to the real thing), and the cobbled-

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 FILM together story of eco-rebellion isn’t be eclipsed by the visuals. If you’re going to see it anyway, see it in 3-D. (RvB) The Book of Eli (R; 118 min.) Denzel Washington stars as the usual wanderer on the usual postapocalyptic wastes. The Hughes brothers’ Bible-ogging apocalypso could be read as a Western, but it’s a monomaniacal one. Washington underplays the part of a soft-spoken drifter who deals with a vicious yet zany town boss (Gary Oldman). The ďŹ lm is blessed with actors (Tom Waits, Michael Gambon and a probably synthesized but touching Mr. Bigglesworth cat), but the movie has this pious streak that can’t be overcome. Scriptwriter Gary Whitta, as in the IMDb sentence, “Gary Whitta was editor of PC Gamer for several years,â€? seems to have retroďŹ tted this ďŹ lm from a video game. In the end, it’s hard to overlook the arbitrariness of what survives (sunglasses, high-powered ammo, Hummers, lingerie, cicadas, the Transamerica Pyramid) over what doesn’t (common sense, humans’ unique ability to invent and band together). (RvB) Broken Embraces (R; 127 min.) A sleek, twisty mystery, illuminated by the stunning PenĂŠlope Cruz, the new Pedro AlmodĂłvar is also a sprawler. The James M. Cain–style plot involves a blind ďŹ lm director from Madrid (LuĂ­s Homar). After losing his sight, the ďŹ lmmaker took the ballsy new name “Harry Caineâ€? and became a writer. News of the death of a corrupt tycoon sends Caine back to confront unďŹ nished business—to retrieve the moment 16 years previously where he

lost both love and sight. The dead tycoo n in question, a cuckolded millionaire named Ernesto Martel (JosĂŠ Luis GĂłmez), unwillingly shared the love of Caine’s life. Lena, known as Magdalena, was an actress, secretary and part-time prostitute who took as her working-girl name Severine. She, of course, is played by Cruz. No one but AlmodĂłvar knows how to make Cruz really fascinating. She acts out a regular scene we used to see in ’60s movies, an auditioning actress trying on wigs. We see this woman’s modes of glamour. Here are the curves of Sophia Loren, the frailty of Audrey Hepburn. Capped with a tousled platinum wig, Cruz evinces something of Lana Turner in her mankiller parts. The spirits summoned up here aren’t travestied; they’re worshipped. Do we feel for Lena? The ďŹ lm is all a bit too stylized for that. She’s such an imago it’s hard to think of her as a character, despite the moments of love, anger and regret that Cruz acts out. (RvB) Crazy Heart (R; 111 min.) Jeff Bridges is the draw in Scott Cooper’s typical softball Sundancian exercise. It’s a belly-baring role for this terriďŹ c actor, playing Bad Blake, a morose satyr of an outlaw musician. He travels via an ancient 1978 Chevy Suburban and slaps together sets with pickup bands. In his few sober moments, Blake lives with the humiliation of having been commercially surpassed by a country superstar named Billy Sweet (Colin Farrell), who was once one of his backup musicians. Touring in Santa Fe, Bad meets a newspaper reporter named Jean (Maggie Gyllenhaal), who lets Bad pick her up. Despite the credited input by T-Bone Burnett, none of the tunes are really memorable, but you sink into them

anyway, and the encircling camera gives the scenes some rhythm. What integrity Crazy Heart doesn’t borrow from Bridges it picks up from the glorious wide-open-spaces cinematography by Barry Markowitz (Sling Blade). (RvB) Creation (PG-13; 108 min.) Without the crescentshaped beard, Charles Darwin (Paul Bettany) is not just a romantic but also a quivering neurotic. The script by John Collee shows us Darwin in the period leading up to the publishing of On the Origin of Species. He’s a nervous wreck, tormented by the declining health of his beloved daughter Annie (Martha West) and unable to confront his religious wife, Emma (Jennifer Connelly), about his scientiďŹ c ďŹ ndings. Creation is unstuck in time; we have to judge the hairline on Bettany’s toupees to tell us where we are in the tale. Here, then, is one of those biopics that make you want to run straight out of

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the theater and go ďŹ nd a good book on the subject. Creation tries to remind us of the price Darwin paid for his genius, but here is a father of evolution ďŹ t to please any smooth religious sadist; they can look and say, “We always told you Darwin was insane.â€? (RvB) Daybreakers (R; 98 min.) This very interesting, ďŹ lmedin-Australia vampire movie provides some ingenious new angles on the old myths. The directors, the Spierig brothers, come up with something unexpected: elements of Malthus and peak oil, and a satire of militarism. In 2019, a vampire plague has left most of the human race devoured. The soldiers are hunting the remaining humans for food. Hungry vampires feeding on each other or their own blood soon devolve into batlike horrors; the vampiric but soulful Dalton (Ethan Hawke) is working ceaselessly on a cure under the direction

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FILM FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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Army Strong Too much Tatum, not enough Seyfried in romantic drama ‘Dear John’

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T BROKE Avatar’s No. 1 box-office streak by being a girls-night-out alternative to the Super Bowl. I hope the ladies enjoyed themselves, but Dear John is as ripe as a baby’s onesie. Any woman who went to ogle a shirtless Channing Tatum—who looks like Frankenstein’s monster built by the J. Crew staff—is in no position to complain about we men, who might point out we really didn’t get enough undraped Amanda Seyfried—and the movie was shot at the beach, yet. Be ashamed, Lasse Hallström: Swedish directors used to be known for sensuality. When Seyfried goes swimming, the camera is 150 feet away. It’s the same distance from which we see Tatum give his big scene: a moment of getting angry at the accusation that his character’s father has Asperger’s syndrome. Ironic—Tatum has all of those muscles, and yet he can’t do any heavy lifting, to use actors’ slang. Dear John doesn’t give him a place to hide, no matter how far back Hallström puts the camera. Dear John is based on Nicholas Sparks’ epistle romance between a big, shy lug of a Green Beret named John Tyree (Tatum) and Savannah Curtis (Seyfried), a well-off college girl who lives by the beach in South Carolina. She’s surrounded by the kind of partying wastrels who like to take a swing at a kill-trained soldier (why?). Savannah herself is a good girl who doesn’t drink, doesn’t smoke and doesn’t sleep around: “In my mind, there’s a never-ending string of swear words,” she says, when Tyree asks if she’s too good to be true. Despite the good breeding, upon the first kiss with Tatum she wraps her legs around him like he’s a brass stripper pole. Tyree begs Savannah to wait for her while his tour of duty ends. Then Sept. 11 strikes: a choice between his country and Amanda Seyfried. There is a shooting, as we see in the opening. There is the father with Asperger’s (Richard Jenkins, underplaying for a while; then, seeking a big moment, he goes full Rain Man). There’s also a kid with autism, who indicates this syndrome by acting like Alvin Chipmunk. If I were Sparks, I would have added the dreaded wound from The Sun Also Rises. It’s not like people who read my schlock would know about Hemingway, and such an unmanning would only help Sparks’ aversion to anything but the one tender sex scene—so tender the leads look like they fell asleep in the saddle. Watching this film, in my mind there was a neverending string of swear words. The Forever War is cornstarch to hold this batter together—the movie shuns female curves and goes full porno on the fuselages of cargo planes instead. Hallström does a few things neat—a matching shot between a fountain of brass shell casings and tumbling of coins at the mint. The coin smithing is Sparks’ usual reference to craftsmanship, despite plots that seem to have been assembled in a Chinese sweatshop on their way to sale at Wal-Mart. Richard von Busack DEAR JOHN (PG-13; 105 min.), directed by Lasse Hallström, written by Jamie Linden, based on the novel by Nicholas Sparks, photographed by Terry Stacey and starring Channing Tatum and Amanda Seyfried, plays valleywide.

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FILM REVIEW

of evil tycoon (Sam Neill). It turns out that at least one vampire has found a cure on his own: Willem Dafoe (very good and looking a little bit like Charles Manson) plays an auto mechanic who calls himself “Elvis”, and who proclaims a particularly noble quote by the King on the likeness of truth and the rising sun. In addition to the evolved politics of this thriller, the Spierigs come up with the capacious blood sprays that’ll keep the core audience contented. (RvB) Edge of Darkness (R; 117 min.) Scriptwriters William Monahan and Andrew Bevel have shaped this remake of a 1985 British TV series for Mel Gibson. There’s an inside joke about the actor/director’s knowledge of Latin, for example, and Gibson’s character, Boston police detective Thomas Craven, sums up his moral stance: “Either you’re hanging from the cross, or you’re banging in the nails.” Craven is a bereaved dad, as well as judge, jury, executioner and bailiff, so he likes to do a bit of both hanging and hammering. The cop’s daughter, Emma (Bojana Novakovic), gets shot by parties unknown; Craven goes on search for the killers. The trail leads to Emma’s workplace, a sinister government-run nuclear facility. Craven is hindered by the plant’s operator (Danny Huston) and helped by knowing government functionary Ray Winstone, by miles the best thing in this movie. Until the final shootouts, which are brisk as firecrackers, Edge of Darkness plods through its one-clue-per-scene story. (RvB) An Education (PG-13; 95 min.) Lone Scherfig’s British coming-of-age film ends with a marathon session of tea brewing, but it has its good points. The look is cool—1960ish England may be more interesting than the full-blown and overexposed later ’60s. Twickenhamraised Jenny (Carey Mulligan) is studying for Oxford when she gets picked up by David (Peter Sarsgaard), a slightly older rotter; his

slightly cruel eyes and flat smile forecast trouble to come. Until then, Jenny gets to see London highlife and nightclubs, and voyages to Paris. Smelling class, and wanting to make their hard-working daughter happy, Jenny’s parents (Cara Seymour, Alfred Molina) relax the leash. And that’s when the young girl learns how David makes his money without working days. No one in the movie apparently saw one of those melodramas about the wealthy seducer who steals a poor but honest girl; letting that matter aside, Mulligan is charming, the meet-cute is deft and Olivia Williams bears all the movie’s spine as a deliberately drabbed-down English teacher. Nick Hornby’s screenplay, from Lynn Barber’s memoir, might have meant he had input on the film’s excellent pre– Swinging London soundtrack. Singer Beth Rowley steals the show as the breathy canary at one nightspot. (RvB) Fish Tank (Unrated; 124 min.) A stunning, smallcamera exploration of a romance between an adult (Michael Fassbender) and a 15-year-old girl (Katie Jarvis) staged in a no-hope housing project in Essex, England. Director Andrea Arnold is a fiendishly persuasive director, and she makes you see things from Mia’s view. The film is the furthest thing from a slumming expedition; we can see past Essex’s rubbish heaps, junkyards and tired-looking houses into something wild—particularly at the plot’s climax at the Thames estuary, where the land ends as abruptly as if it had been chewed away by a steam shovel. The finale is where this little film gets big: it’s like the end of a Romantic novel when the elements are brought in to witness the emotional states of the characters on a windy fen or the banks of churning water. Arnold observes the raw hedonism and willfulness that makes a poor life bearable. It’s rare when a director who is so sensitive, who has such a sure eye and ear, can understand the bliss of a hard party. (RvB) From Paris With Love (R; 92 min.) Jonathan Rhys Meyers plays

a naive ambassadorial employee working with a hardened American spy (John Travolta) to fight terrorists in Paris. Sacre blue! The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus (PG-13; 122 min.) For Terry Gilliam, Don Quixote is still the ur-text. Despite the various stops and starts he has had adapting the Cervantes classic, Gilliam repeatedly makes films about fantasy as an escape from a cruel world. The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, a very personal and not-so-coherent fantasy, has Christopher Plummer in the Man of la Mancha role this time, with Verne Troyer as Percy, a dwarf Sancho Panza. Plummer plays Doctor Parnassus, an immortal sage reduced to busking in a horse-drawn Gypsy wagon. He and his crew set up their stand in the streets of modern-day London at its vilest, trying to lure patrons into a world beyond the doctor’s mirror. On board is his daughter, who doesn’t know that she has been promised to the devil on her 16th birthday; Mr. Nick (Tom Waits) is sniffing around already. During their travels, the group rescues a hanged man named Tony (an irresolute Heath Ledger). Certainly, Gilliam’s love for antique theater is true—although the greasepaint and cardboard make one wonder why he didn’t stage this story instead of filming it. The autobiographical angle is plain regarding the showman’s heartbreak—begging for money and coaxing an audience. We can understand why it’s hard for Gilliam when we see his vision of what the audience really is: rich matinee dames; wide-mouthed tarts coming out of a pub; a scurvy, violent little brat with a Game Boy. (RvB) The Last Station (R; 112 min.) Well cast, visually pleasant yet strangely toneless film about Tolstoy’s last days. Around 1910 in Moscow, Valentin (James McAvoy) is recruited by Chertkov (Paul Giamatti), who is dedicated to carrying out the author’s reformist ideas regarding celibacy and manual labor. Valentin will live on Tolstoy’s commune and record the great man’s thoughts. Tolstoy (Christopher Plummer) is enjoying a sort of Indian summer, watching his minifarm bloom and receiving the adulation of the world. But the count’s countess—Sofya, his wife of nearly 50 years, played by Helen Mirren—has tired of her husband’s utopian politics. Meanwhile, Valentin’s desire to stay pure and virginal is sorely tested by Masha (Kerry Condon). Mirren does the great lady thing with ease; Plummer plays Tolstoy with the gusto of a hamloving actor tackling Fiddler on the Roof. Director Michael Hoffman gives us Tolstoy as a cracked, principled old grandfather, manipulated by outsiders. (RvB) Legion (R; 100 min.) Paul Bettany, Lucas Black and Tyrese Gibson star in a futuristic thriller about human survival. It takes place in a diner. The Lovely Bones (PG-13; 135 min.) In Pennsylvania in the early 1970s,14-year-old Susie Salmon (Saoirse Ronan) is lured into an underground lair and raped and murdered by a neighbor. From the antechamber to heaven, Susie watches what else happens to her family in the years that come. What keeps Susie from moving on, it seems, is her murderer. He has killed before and may kill again: an element of vigilantism keeps Peter Jackson’s animation-gilded fantasy from looking too much like the cover of a Jehovah’s Witness pamphlet about heaven. Alice Sebold’s book was a success because it played into a favorite adolescent daydream: “If I were dead, they’d be sorry.” First-rate production design makes this surpass The Ice Storm as the ultimate dense ’70s visual time capsule. The most satisfying moments come in the too-orderly lair of the maniac (a dreadfully miscast Stanley Tucci). Not much help from Mark Wahlberg and Rachel Weisz as the parents; barn-door


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 FILM

THE MAN IN THE GRAY FLANNEL HAIR SUIT Cfojdjp!Efm!Upsp!mfut!ijt!joofs!cfbtu!mpptf!jo!Ă•Uif!Xpmgnbo-Ă–!pqfojoh!Gsjebz/ broad yet somehow welcome moments of comedy relief are provided by Susan Sarandon. Ronan is an effectively macabre staring angel, but she’s not quite the book’s mousy, nerdish girl turned into a master of a universe. (RvB) Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire (R; 110 min.) Much lauded, but it’s a bulldozer. It’s 1987, during some of Harlem’s most suffering years. A girl of immense girth, 16-year-old Claireece (Gabourey “Gabbyâ€? Sidibe) makes her way through life. She has intelligence, but she can’t focus, and we learn why in ashback; she was serially raped by her mother’s boyfriend. Her scathing, angry mother, Mary (Mo’Nique), blames Precious for this and her resulting pregnancy), urging her to stop this foolishness about school and go on welfare. Watching Sidibe, we see something of what this movie could have been if it hadn’t been so overcooked. Precious is

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practically a pre-Clinton-era dream of the need for welfare reform: here, welfare is a generational evil that Precious might fall heir to. As you’ve heard, Mo’Nique is great, but Precious has a judgmental streak that won’t quit. And that’s been essential to a success worthy of its sensationalism. By the end of the movie, you know who all the heroes and all the villains are, and you can go home comfortable. (RvB) Sherlock Holmes (PG-13; 128 min.) There are moments during Sherlock Holmes when you wish you could hit director Guy Ritchie with his own storyboard; there are bone-crushing ďŹ ghts that you feel like applauding just to celebrate the fact that they’re over at last. Yet all in all, Sherlock Holmes is ripping fun. Robert Downey Jr.’s expert acting reects Aldous Huxley’s thought that if you could open the doors of perception, you would see the world as it is: inďŹ nite. This insight sums up the mind of the world’s greatest

detective—it also sums up the mind of a schizophrenic. Downey’s Holmes is a dandy in high Victorian regalia, smoked glasses, ascots and the kind of slanted hats worn in Oscar Wilde’s circle. But we also see another side of Holmes—a hermit crab in a dank at, huddled under a silk dressing gown so raveled it looks shaggy as a bear skin. Mark Strong’s Lord Blackwood is apprehended by Holmes in mid–black mass and ushered in to a well-deserved hanging. Naturally, Inspector Lestrade (Eddie Marsan) decides that the case is closed. But it seems the grave cannot hold Blackwood. Holmes is approached by two different clients: the ever-troublesome Irene Adler (Rachel McAdams) and the head of a Masons-like group, who are troubled by the specter of Blackwood. The movie keeps coming back to a serene partnership—when Holmes says “The game’s afoot,â€? Jude Law’s formidable Watson picks up the rest of the Henry V quote. (RvB)

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A Single Man (R; 99 min.) Tom Ford’s adaptation of Christopher Isherwood’s novel, essential reading in the gay canon. Colin Firth plays professor George Falconer, an Englishman in Los Angeles in the early 1960s. He’s a bereaved figure; being in the closet, he isn’t permitted to show his sorrow after the death of his longtime male lover in an automobile accident. This grieving single man’s secret is known only to his friend Charlotte, called Charley (Julianne Moore), also a former flame, who has never quite got over George. Falconer has another secret, though: he is putting his affairs in order, with the plan of committing suicide that night. Certainly, Firth looks like a man of the era in question. Moore practically mainlined her eye shadow to get that zonked 1960s aura. Despite the opera on A Single Man’s soundtrack, it couldn’t be less operatic: nothing seems like a matter of

life and death. The film is beautiful, but it’s not the kind of beauty one can feel much about. Ford is good with the placement of actors on a set; he’s a tableau maker. The fine clothes don’t make the men. (RvB) Tooth Fairy (PG; 101 min.) It might rekindle your child’s faith in the tooth fairy, but it won’t do their faith in the movies any good. Dwayne Johnson, a.k.a. the Rock, stars as a mean hockey player on the skids in Lansing, Mich. His remark about the nonexistence of the tooth fairy makes the fairies enslave him for two weeks. Once-hot scriptwriters Babaloo Mendel and Lowell Ganz have had their script amended, but it’s a real end-of-the-line project with Ashley Judd (as Johnson’s girlfriend) looking the most likely to be carried down by the wreck. Johnson tries to fluff the movie but there’s no help there, either; Chase Ellison as the teenage son is, oddly, the noteworthy performance; some might think that

director Michael Lembeck let Ellison play the kid as too troubled, but at least there’s a sense in him of troubles too big to be healed by the usual “dream big” speeches. Billy Crystal is mucho bad as fairyland’s gadget expert. Julie Andrews, as the head fairy, goes beyond self-parody into a look of near pain; she recalls her old foe Pauline Kael’s comment: “They may have forgotten how to make good movies in Hollywood, but at least they’re good at preserving people.” (RvB) Up in the Air (R; 109 min.) As the predatory Ryan Bingham, George Clooney delivers a startlingly good performance. Sadly, the film is compromised by director Jason Reitman, who shows signs of morphing into Cameron Crowe. Bingham is a hired terminator—a man brought in to fire people; he tolerates this job with the benefits of an executive life with plenty of travel. Enter a young, seemingly equally callous rival (Anna Kendrick). Having this inexperienced girl along interrupts Ryan’s regularly scheduled no-strings flings with a fellow constant business traveler, Alex (Vera Farmiga). The acrid first half is the best part—Clooney makes us admire Ryan’s gamesmanship. The film wants us to equate two different kinds of toxicities—to draw a line between the corporate bloodletting that juices up stock portfolios and the wrongness of the present-tense sex life that Ryan and Alex enjoy. Too bad that Farmiga and Clooney are such a scintillating pair that you don’t want to see them pay the piper. And as a critique of corporate culture, Up in the Air is about as bold as Connecticut salsa. (RvB) When in Rome (PG-13) A romantic comedy with Kristen Bell and Josh Duhamel. The Young Victoria (PG; 104 min.) Unforgivably static, despite the fascinating subject: the early and often unpopular years of the longest-reigning and most iron-bottomed British royal who ever lived. As Victoria, the lovely and suitably aristocratic Emily Blunt is the best part of this story. Treated with brutal overcaution and surveillance by her mother, the Duchess of Kent (Miranda Richardson), and her friend (perhaps with benefits) Lord Conroy, the girl is kept locked up and escorted down all stairs as if she were a brittle-boned child. When she grows older, her cousin Albert (Rupert Friend) comes to court, and this starts a romance, tainted with scheming by the power in Albert’s family, the perfidious Belgian king (Thomas Kretschmann). Director Jean-Marc Valée slows things down and smooths over the complexities of history; matters get simplified to the point where it seems like nothing is going on in the world outside the problem of Victoria trying to get some time alone with Albert. The sketchy background and the slow pace bring on the familiar PBS-watcher’s narcosis. (RvB) The White Ribbon (R; 144 min.) In the insignificant village of Eichwald (“Oakwood”), just before World War I, we hear a series of stories. These stories concern acts of violence that disturbed the orderly progression of the years. The events are narrated by an old man who was, long ago, the town’s vacantlooking schoolteacher (Christian Friedel). He advises us that everything we will see is based on things half-heard and halfremembered. We can take this ineffectual man’s word for it. Clues pass him by, and he can’t provide a solid resolution for the story. He doesn’t seem to understand that Eichwald is poisoned, root and branch. The schoolteacher comments that what we see will help us understand “the events that came after.” By “the events,” director Michael Haneke may mean Germany’s next 30 years after 1914. Eichwald is a serpent’segg hatchery: the village’s obedient children will be participants in the kaiser’s war and Hitler’s crime wave. (RvB)


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

LLife ife fe of of a Maverick Mav aver eric ick March M Mar arch 2 att 7 p.m. pm California Thea Theatre atre

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Mavericks M avericks INSPIRE INSPIR IN RE by y transforming transf n formi ming lives liv ivess a and nd D Deepak eep epak ak Chopra Cho hopra ha h has as touched touched hed lives live ves around aro round the h globe. globe. With gl Wit ith over over 50 50 published p blish publ hed d books books tr anslated s over 35 languages, lan nguages, along along with translated into over filmss a and nd television showss that have carried ed his in influence nfluence a and nd wisdom, wisdom m, Deepak Chopra’s Chopra’s incre incredible edible life has been one o of transformation, transformation, o also millions not simply s ply for him, but als sim so for the m illions whose wh w ho ose lives he has helped d and and transformed. transformed. JJoin o Cinequest oin Cinequest as we honor Ci hon nor the great life of Deepak D Dee eepa pak Chopra.

Cinequest C ine ne eq qu uest st honors o one ne e of of th tthe he m most ost dynamic os dyn yna amic c artists Traffic, a r tissts ts Benjamin Benjamin Bratt Bra rat t (Piñero, (Pi Piñero ero, TTr raf af ffiic, La LLaw aw & Order) Orde er)) with an incredible eve evening ning g featuring ga spot tlilight screening screenin sc ing g of of La La MISSION—a MISSION MI ON — a powerful power e r fu l spotlight recalls culture, people and beliefs film that that rec ecalls th tthe he cu c ulture,, peop p eoplle a nd b elie ie f s of Bratt’s Brratt t t’s childhood childhood ch hood in n the he Mission Mission Mi on district dist strict of of San Francisco. Following the screening, screening, engage en gage in in a 30 30 minute minu nute conversation con co onversation n with with h Benamin B ena amin n Bratt Bratt t during durin ing which whi hic ich he he will wilil receive recei eive the Maverick M ve ick Spirit Maver Spiri Sp r t Award Aw A ward rd for for his fo his continuing, hi con ontinui uing, adventurous a dve enturous work in film a and nd television.

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

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METROGUIDE

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 MUSIC

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Billy Joel and Elton John_73 The Thermals_73 Chris Shiflett & Tony Sly_74 Classical Moves_76 Haiti Benefit II_78

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MC Lars celebrates 10 years of rockin’ his Stanford cred and mad lit skills By Steve Palopoli

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I got stabbed with the poison sword/ Then I stabbed my girlfriend’s brother/ And then I stabbed my uncle and we’ve all killed each other/ To be or not to be? Well I guess that solves that one/ And I would have stayed in Wittenberg if I’d known that this would happen” —MC Lars, “Hey There Ophelia”

W

HO says an English degree is worthless in the real world? MC Lars has taken his straight to the streets. The 27-year-old Lars, born Andrew Robert Nielsen, often pokes fun at his own white-bread upbringing in the Bay Area, on songs like “White Kids Aren’t Hyphy.” That 2007 single, also included on his newest album This Gigantic Robot Kills, got play on Live 105 for its send-up of the Yay Area’s hip-hop scene, in which he laments his own inability to keep it real, get it twisted and ghost-ride his Volvo. But when it comes to his liberalarts education, the self-proclaimed “post-postmodern” laptop rapper is hella proud. He flaunted his newly minted Stanford degree in 2006 by naming his album that year The Graduate. And though he did come into his own playing campus parties

and freestyling in the Stanford Coffee House, he was mixing classic lit content and hip-hop form long before that, while growing up in Carmel Valley and attending Robert Louis Stevenson High in Pebble Beach. “My first rap song that I recorded, I was 16, I took Macbeth, and made a song called ‘Rapbeth.’ The assignment was to make fun of Macbeth for class. So I did that song and recorded it, and I got an A on it,” says Lars. “I realized that hip-hop and literature are the same thing, quite literally. Hiphop is literature. Hip-hop is poetry. That’s something that was harder to convince my teachers, but once I could prove it, it was this amazing thing.” Since then, he’s only done a handful of those songs, generally one per record, tops. Certainly other songs he’s done are better-known around the world—“Download This Song,” his Iggy-Pop-sampling ode to MP3s, charted outside the U.S., and his song “iGeneration” led to Lars being credited for popularizing (or, according to John Mayer, coining) the term describing post–Cold War kids. But songs like “Ahab,” his rap retelling of Moby Dick, and the new album’s Hamlet rocker “Hey There

Ophelia” demonstrate why he’s the premier practitioner of lit rap. It’s not easy to condense a Shakespeare classic into 50 or so lines of rhyme; make it funny, cool and fittingly tragic; work in references to Amy Winehouse, R. Kelly and O.J.; and throw in an interpolation of Therapy’s song “Screamager,” so that Ophelia’s refrain is “Screw that, forget about that/ I don’t want to know about anything like that/ I’ve got nothing to do/ But hang around and get screwed up on you.” And Lars knows it. “Those are always my favorite songs. Like, ‘Hey There Ophelia’ is probably my favorite song on This Gigantic Robot Kills,” he says. “I’m eventually going to do an album that’s all literature songs. I want to do The Metamorphosis, and Catcher in the Rye. Mark Twain. Make it an amazing record like that.” It used to be punk rock for about four years/ I played lead guitar, we dissed Britney Spears/ Amphoteric the name, Central Cali band/ Local shows, t-shirts, EP’s, no plan/ Just chilling with the crew slamming power chords/ They wanted more guitars but I got bored/ I was born to rock heads and fill them too/ But did

the world really need another Blink 182? —MC Lars, “Straight Outta Stockholm” WHEN he was 11, Lars heard Chuck D for the first time on the Anthrax CD, Attack of the Killer B’s. It’s mystifying why Anthrax’s collaboration with Public Enemy on that version of “Bring the Noise” hasn’t gotten its proper due for turning thousands of metalhead kids on to hip-hop in 1991. It’s a great story: Chuck D heard about Anthrax’s Scott Ian wearing Public Enemy shirts at the band’s gigs, which led to a shoutout to Anthrax on the original P.E. version of “Bring the Noise.” Anthrax then rang him up about redoing the song together, and after a few awkward moments in which Chuck D wondered if they were really serious, the first thrash-rap hybrid was born. Obviously, Carmel Valley didn’t have much of a music scene, but Lars carved out a regular place to gig performing among the girls with a guitar and old guys with a harmonica at the Friday night open-mic at a Pacific Grove spot called Juice N Java. He figures his MC Lars career was really born when he was 17, which is +-


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why he’ll be celebrating his 10th anniversary Feb. 21 with a show at Bottom of the Hill in San Francisco. “It was hard, ’cause I had to put on my own shows. I really got my start at Stanford, playing shows at the Stanford CoHo, and playing parties. Eventually I started playing gigs in the city.” Not every NorCal locale proved to be ideal for his brand of hip-hop. “I played this place called Jim Dandy’s in Castroville, this bar. I have this song about John Brown, the revolutionary, and how white racism is white people’s problem and black people’s burden—really heavy stuff,” he says. “I was like, ‘We need to learn not to be racist,’ and hicks were yelling ‘Why?’” Still, he found his way. Even while he was doing his punk shows with his band Amphoteric, he was cross-promoting his hip-hop stuff, sometimes opening his own band’s shows. As for his breakthrough in 2003, once again, against all conventional wisdom, he has his English major to thank. “I went to Oxford to study, for my Shakespeare requirement. That was where everything changed, ’cause I got signed. Nettwerk Management had Avril Lavigne, and Sarah MacLachlan, and Brand New was blowing up. Dido, Barenaked Ladies. Anything Canadian that was big in the early part of the last decade, they were doing that. They got behind me, and I got a publishing deal and distribution. For four or five years, they really had my back. That’s how I made The Graduate, because they helped me clear all the samples. That was kind of the shift, and then I met Bowling for Soup and everything else just happened from there.” Bowling for Soup, the Texas pop-punk band best known for the hits “1985” and “Almost,” became big Lars fans and supporters. Through them, he met Brendan Brown, of the band Wheatus (of “Teenage Dirtbag” fame), a collaborator whose friendship led to several of the songs on the new record. “I stayed with him for a month in 2007, and just wrote. Some of the best songs from that record came from his support of me. We became good friends. I’ve got a lot of love and respect for those guys, they’re like our big brothers.” Once upon a time Grandmaster Flash/ Inspired these nerds with a culture clash/ Once Run-DMC mixed rock guitars/ With the kick, snare, kick, kick, snare/ Public Enemy took a political stand/ Now we pirate these records like damn the man/ NWA got attacked by the media/Now we check the facts up on Wikipedia/ Can’t get on the stage at the Jay-Z show/ So we boot up ProTools and bust a funky flow —MC Lars, “True Player for Real” LARS has been closely associated with the “nerdcore” movement, a sort of gimmicky concept of which I’ve never been a fan. I’ve got some personal nerdcore favorites, like

Optimus Rhyme’s “Sick Day” and mc chris’ genius work on The Brak Show—really, is there anything better in all of Swimdom than the mostly rapped “Brak Street” episode? (“Dad, you don’t know about my rapping ability!” “What you got is futility! Futility!” “C’mon, dad, that’s a mean thing to say!” “Hey, you wanna be a rapper gotta play that way!”) But generally, nerdcore rappers just seem to take themselves too damn seriously. Lars, on the other hand, never seemed to fit into that. Though he counts many nerdcore artists among his friends and collaborators, and gives the genre its props in his songs, he acknowledges his problems with it. “Nerdcore shouldn’t be kids’ understanding of hip-hop. It’s cool as an anthropological extension of how hip-hop has evolved,” says Lars. “The whole political component of the African American experience in the Bronx in the ’70s, and the financial disparity under Reagan in the ’80s, is kind of what hip-hop trades on as its old-school genesis. I think nerdcore’s really racist, because it takes that underdog thing of an underclass judged by their race, and uses it as this big, ridiculous metaphor to be like ‘the nerds are being persecuted.’ That turns hip-hop into this weird minstrel show to me.” “Hey Mr. Record Man, the joke’s on you/ Running your label like it was 1992/ Hey Mr. Record Man, your system can’t compete/ It’s the new artist model, file transfer complete —MC Lars, “Download This Song” BY contrast, Lars’ rapper persona trades on a respect for the origins of the genre, and a certain wide-eyed innocence. Even at his most sarcastic—mocking record industry stupidity in “Download This Song” and “Signing Emo”; railing against Misfits candle tins, AC/DC hair clips and Sex Pistols boxer shorts in “Hot Topic Is Not Punk Rock”; or giving Lil’ John an Eminem-style kiss-off in “Generic Crunk Rap”—his music is firmly in the spirit of getting everyone on the same page. For instance, while the Who’s “My Generation” (and Patti Smith’s superior cover of the song) was meant as a defense, Lars’ “iGeneration” is a call to arms. “Want to be more than info super highway traffic/ Want to be more than a walking demographic,” he raps, and the subsequent, original-referencing line “Hope I die before I get sold” is essential to understanding Lars’ music. Instead of the typical hip-hop (and nerdcore) assertion that “I’m the best,” Lars’ attitude is “we could all be better,” and he is constantly pushing his listeners, his generation, to embrace that possibility for evolution. He also has the ability to laugh at himself, much like Adam Goren, who became one of his idols when he discovered Goren’s ,&


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sequencer-driven solo project, Atom and His Package. Lars wrote the song “Adam You’re Awesomeâ€? for his ďŹ rst record, and covered the classic Atom and His Package salute to metrics, “(Lord It’s Hard to Be Happy When You’re Not) Using the Metric Systemâ€? on This Gigantic Robot Kills. Atom, it should be noted, once did a hilarious cover of the Geto Boys’ “Mind Playing Tricks on Me,â€? in which he imagines going trick or treating with Willie D, Bushwick Bill and Scarface. “He’s a real inspiration,â€? Lars says of Goren. “He’s totally amazing, just a nice, real guy. Punk rock. His attitude, I took that, and that’s what allowed me to sustain myself. The attitude that you just make music because you love it, not trying to be in a scene, being self-sustaining. And the joy that he found in writing songs about his friends and his personal life. That’s what I’ve kind of been taking recently.â€? The latest album also features two of his other childhood heroes—the late, great rock outsider Wesley Willis (who came up with the title This Gigantic Robot Kills, as a sound clip on the album proves) and Weird Al Yankovic, who plays accordion on one track. On “True Player For Real,â€? Lars tells his friends that they know they’ve made it because they’re playing with Weird Al. This is a concept that probably only males of a certain age can understand, but understand it we do. “The Weird Al thing was an amazing moment, when I realized I was on his radar and that he respected what I was doing. I was in Australia on tour, ’cause ‘Download This Song’ was a hit in Australia, so I was doing MTV and all this crazy press there,â€? says Lars. “He hit me up on Myspace, and at ďŹ rst I didn’t know if it was legit. He’d seen some news thing I did on mtv.com where they interviewed me and I talked about how much I loved him. He was like, ‘Thanks for the nice words about me, I think what you’re doing is cool.’â€? He also credits his Christian faith with his positive attitude, an interesting revelation from the guy who chose to give one of his anti-Bush songs the Atom-esque title “I Can’t Speak That Well, And I Am a Christian Fundamentalist Prick.â€? “I could never do something cynical or negative, because I know in my heart that things aren’t that bad. It’s because I have that inspiration,â€? he says. “That’s why I don’t curse extraneously. I know families come to my shows. I kind of have this mission to make the world better, and inspire people to be their best. And with musicians, to work with and help my friends who are doing great stuff and really care about what they’re doing. And then everything works out. At least for 10 years.â€? MC Lars performs his 10th anniversary show Feb. 21 at Bottom of the Hill in San Francisco, 1233 17th St., at 7pm. Tickets are $10/$112, call 415.621.4455

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[73]

HOPE I GET OLD BEFORE I DIE!!Fmupo!Kpio!boe!Cjmmz!Kpfm! mjwf!up!qmbz!bopuifs!ebz!bu!IQ!Qbwjmjpo!po!Uvftebz/

Billy Joel and Elton John I=: C6B:H d[ hdbZ d[ 7^aan ?dZaÉh [dgbZg WVcYh/ I]Z :X]dZh! i]Z :bZgVaYh! i]Z Adhi Hdjah! i]Z =VhhaZh# I]Z cVbZ d[ i]Z WVg l]ZgZ ]Z ]VY id egdhi^ijiZ ]^bhZa[ id X]ZZg je YZajYZY WddoZ]djcYh/ i]Z :mZXji^kZ Gddb Vi L^ah]^gZ VcY LZhiZgc# I]Z Òghi \^ga > ZkZg ;gZcX] `^hhZY XaV^bZY i]Vi h]Z VcY ]Zg [Vb^an hVl ?dZa eaVn^c\ ÆE^Vcd BVcÇ Vi V H]V`ZnÉh e^ooV dc HjchZi 7djaZkVgY# ÆH]ZÉh 6alVnh V LdbVc id BZÇ ^h VWdji ?dZaÉh l^[Z0 ÆJeidlc <^gaÇ ^h VWdji ]^h hZXdcY l^[Z# =^h jeXdb^c\ VjidW^d\gVe]n l^aa ZmeaV^c i]^h# I]Z Vji]dg d[ i]Z hdc\ ÆDcan I]Z <ddY 9^Z Ndjc\Ç ^h +%# BZVcl]^aZ! :aidc ?d]c l^aa ValVnh WZ `cdlc [dg Vc Vgi^hi^X XVaVb^in VWdji V XVcYaZ VcY i]Z l^cY gZXdgYZY dc <ddYWnZ NZaadl 7g^X` GdVY# > WV^aZY dc ]^b V[iZg i]Vi YdjWaZ VaWjb WZXVjhZ ]Z lVh hiVgi^c\ id add` [gdj[gdj! VcY i]Zc 9Vk^Y 7dl^Z Vgg^kZY VcY > ]VY id egZiZcY >ÉY ValVnh a^`ZY [gdj[gdj Vaa Vadc\# ?d]cÉh &&$,$,% hi^aa hdjcYh a^`Z ^i ]Vh V ejahZ0 ^i lVh dcZ d[ bn [Vkdg^iZ VaWjbh l]Zc > lVh V `^Y# DWk^djhan > ]VYcÉi ]ZVgY Vcn ;Vih 9db^cd# I]Z Vji]dg d[ i]Z kZghZ Æ>ÉkZ cd l^h] id WZ a^k^c\ +% nZVgh dcÇ ^h cdl +'# Richard von Busack BILLY JOEL and ELTON JOHN perform Tuesday (Feb. 16) at 7:30pm at the HP Pavilion, 525 W. Santa Clara St., San Jose. Tickets are $54.50–$180. (408.287.9200)

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Steve Palopoli THE THERMALS play Saturday (Feb. 13) at 9pm at the Blank Club, 44 S. Almaden Ave., San Jose. Tickets are $14. (408.29.BLANK)

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[74] MUSIC

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Steve Palopoli CHRIS SHIFLETT & TONY SLY perform an acoustic show on Friday (Feb. 12) at 9pm at the Blank Club, 44 S. Almaden Ave., San Jose. Tickets are $10/$12. (408.29.BLANK)

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

[75]


[76] MUSIC

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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(ATMOSPHERE AND PRICES TO PROVE IT) Other’s have come and gone. But the real deal is still here. So come on in and see Patty’s for our last Shark’s season. And still the coldest beer plus the cheapest drinks in town. (Always ďŹ rst drink $1.00 off with ticket after any HP event.)

A good old fashioned corner bar

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MASTERS OF PERSIAN MUSIC: THREE GENERATIONS takes place Sunday (Feb. 14) at 8pm at the Carriage House Theatre, Montalvo Arts Center, 15400 Montalvo Road, Saratoga. Tickets are $31–$45. (408.961.5858)

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Classical Moves

Michael S. Gant

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FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

[77]

Upcoming Events


[78] MUSIC

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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ADVICE GODDESS FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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you know, Booboo, Sweetiepants, Pookie or, in your case, Pure Evil, and Cold and Heartless Machine. You’ve spent so long with an exploding woman—an emotional blackmailer who tries to hell-state you into meeting her demands—that the nasty life has become normal life. In fact, the way you put it (from your hotel room in Stockholm syndrome), the real problem is that she’s “amazingly sweet and giving”— when she isn’t nearly putting your eye out with her rings. You need to recognize her behavior for what it is—domestic violence that can lead to more serious violence, should she run out of expensive jewelry to bean you with and reach for something a little heavier. It’s fine by me if you want to hang around looking for the good in some woman while she bends silverware with her screams, but you and your wife aren’t just two people making each other miserable. One of you is desperately trying to make a third person. You need to do everything in your power to see that your as-yet-unborn child remains unborn. While I’m not usually one to explicitly advise people to end relationships, in your case, let me make this perfectly plain: Get out before she straps you down, hooks up the vacuum cleaner and takes your sperm.

Bn Zm"]jhWVcY VcY > lZgZ bVgg^ZY [dg &. nZVgh# LZÉkZ WZZc Y^kdgXZY [dg ild VcY ]VkZ ild hdch! &, VcY '%# =Z bVgg^ZY V ldbVc ÒkZ nZVgh daYZg i]Vc bn daYZhi hdc# 6bVo^c\an! i]ViÉh cdi bn egdWaZb# >iÉh i]Vi ]Z XVaah l^i] i]Z egZiZchZ d[ X]ZX`^c\ dc i]Z Wdnh! i]Zc iVa`h VWdji daY i^bZh VcY YgVbV daY VcY cZl# > gZVa^oZ i]Vi ]^h l^[ZÉh hd ndjc\ i]Vi ]Z XVcÉi hiVgi XdckZghVi^dch l^i] ÆGZbZbWZg l]Zc!Ç Wji > cZZY id bdkZ dc l^i] bn a^[Z#Å<Zii^c\ NVbbZgZY You, too, need to start a conversation with “Remember when,” as in, “Remember when you divorced me and married that other woman?” He could be delving into the milestones of her life, like where she was when Britney and Justin called it quits. Not surprisingly, he seems to prefer adult conversation with a woman who knows

who he is and where he’s been. Inform him, kindly and politely, that from now on, you’ll only talk about the children—that is, the children you gave birth to. He’s made his bed and tucked a very young woman into it, and it’s time he focused on things they have in common, like how 10 years ago, he was driving carpool, and she was riding in one.

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

CLASSIFIEDS

metro CLASSIFIEDS CLASSIFIED INDEX

PLACING AN AD 84 84 83 85

Single Services Employment Family Services Music

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Notice To Readers California law requires that contractors taking jobs that total $500 or more (labor or materials) be licensed by the Contractors State License Board. State law also requires that contractors include their license number on all advertising. You can check the status of your licensed contractor at www.cslb.ca.gov or 1-800321-CSLB (2752). Unlicensed contractors taking jobs that total less than $500 must state in their advertisements that they are not licensed by the Contractors State License Board.

ggg g g Carpet Center g If you and your partner are having trouble come in and get your personalities checked, as this may be the reason for your disputes. Call 408-383-9400

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[85]

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[84]

ASTROLOGY FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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6g^Zh (March 21–April 19): “Hate leaves ugly scars,” wrote author Mignon McLaughlin, but “love leaves beautiful ones.” If I’m reading the astrological omens correctly, Aries, you’re scheduled to receive at least one of the beautiful kind of scars in the coming months—maybe even two or three. In fact, I think they’ll be such lovely booboos that they will markedly add to your overall attractiveness. Rarely if ever have you been privileged to hurt as good as you will in 2010—thanks to the benevolent jolts of love. Happy Valentine Daze! IVjgjh (April 20–May 20): In my view, 2010 is

the year you should expand your world. That could mean enlarging your circle of allies or building a bigger web of connections. It might mean broadening your appeal or widening your frame of reference or opening your mind to possibilities you’ve been closed to. It may even involve extending your territory or increasing the range of your travels. However you choose to expand, Taurus, I urge you to put love at the heart of your efforts. Love should be the fuel that motivates you and the reference point that ensures you’re always making smart moves. For inspiration, memorize this line by poet Elizabeth Barrett Browning: “I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach.” In your case, Taurus, “thee” should mean the whole world.

<Zb^c^ (May 21–June 20): Of all the signs of the zodiac, you Geminis are most likely to thrive if you experiment with new approaches to kissing in the coming weeks. To whip up your fervor, read incendiary texts like William Cane’s The Art of Kissing. Conspire with an imaginative partner to conjure up a new kissing game or even a sacred kissing ritual. And come up with your own interpretations of the following kiss techniques: the throbbing kiss, the sip kiss, the butterfly kiss, the tiger kiss, the whispering kiss. Happy Valentine Daze! 8VcXZg ( June 21–July 22): Happy Valentine Daze,

Cancerian! After meditating about what advice would be most valuable for your love life in the coming months, I decided on this challenge from poet William Butler Yeats: “True love is a discipline in which each divines the secret self of the other and refuses to believe in the mere daily self.” In other words, create in your imagination a detailed picture of your loved ones at their best. Each day, make it a point to feel joy and gratitude for their most excellent beauty and power—as well as the beauty and power that are still ripening and will one day appear in full bloom.

AZd ( July 23–Aug. 22): A friend of mine has woven her life together with a Leo who doesn’t fully appreciate the ways she expresses her adoration. She asked me to use my bully pulpit as a horoscope writer to convey a message to her lover, and I agreed, because I think it’s excellent advice for all of the Leo tribe this Valentine season. Here’s what she said: “Just because somebody doesn’t always love you the way you wish they would, doesn’t mean they don’t love you the best they can and with all they have.” Are you willing to consider the possibility that maybe you should take that plea to heart, Leo? I hope so, because then you’ll be able to get some of the good loving you’ve closed yourself off from. K^g\d (Aug. 23–Sept. 22): Happy Valentine Daze,

Virgo! I meditated on what message might best energize your love life, and what I came up with is a declaration by author Mignon McLaughlin: “Love unlocks doors and opens windows that weren’t even there before.” In other words, the love you should be most interested in during the coming months is the kind that opens your eyes to sights that were previously invisible and that creates new possibilities you’ve barely imagined.

A^WgV (Sept. 23–Oct. 22): Happy Valentine Daze,

Libra! My astrological hunch is that you’d benefit from the specific teaching that would come from exploring a three-way relationship. But wait. Don’t jump to conclusions. Here’s the form I think it should take: Fantasize that the merger of you and your lover or ally has created a third thing that hovers near you, protecting and guiding the two of you. Call this third thing an angel. Or call it the soul of your connection or the inspirational force of your relationship. Or call it the special work the two of you can accomplish together. And let this magical presence be the third point of your love triangle.

HXdge^d (Oct. 23–Nov. 21): Happy Valentine Daze,

Scorpio! After meditating on what advice would best serve your love life, I decided to offer you the words of psychologist Carl Jung: “The creation of something new is not accomplished by the intellect but by the play instinct acting from inner necessity. The creative mind plays with the objects it loves.” As I see it, my dear, acting on Jung’s wisdom will help you carry out your primary task in the coming months, which is to bring novel experiences and fresh perspectives to your most engaging relationship. The best way to accomplish that is not with nonstop serious talk and intense analysis, but with a generous dose of playful improvisation and experimental fun.

HV\^iiVg^jh (Nov. 22–Dec. 21): To prepare your

Valentine horoscope, I did a lengthy meditation on your love life. I wish I could offer you a 20page treatise on my conclusions, but there’s not enough room. So instead I’ll give you the single most important piece of advice I came up with: The coming week will be an excellent time for you to survey the history of your love life, starting with the first moment you ever fell in love. I mean you should actually stream the memories across your mind’s eye as if you were watching a movie. Feel all the feelings roused by each scene, but also try to maintain some objectivity about it all. Watch for recurring themes. Be especially alert for unexpected insights that emerge about the past. And through it all, be wildly compassionate toward yourself and your co-stars.

8Veg^Xdgc (Dec. 22–Jan. 19): “If I love you, what

business is it of yours?” wrote Johann Wolfgang von Goethe. Now I’m offering his words for you to use as your mantra in the coming months. Your main job, as I see it, is simply to be a lover of pretty much everything—to generate, cultivate, and express love in abundance—and not to worry about whether your love is reciprocated or how it’s regarded. It’s a tall order, I know—one of the most difficult assignments I’ve ever suggested. And yet I think you have the soul power and the crafty intelligence necessary to accomplish it. Happy Valentine Daze, Capricorn!

6fjVg^jh ( Jan. 20–Feb. 18): Happy Valentine

Daze, Aquarius! In my search for the counsel that would be of greatest help to your love life in the coming months, I decided on this observation by psychologist Albert Ellis: “The art of love is largely the art of persistence.” I hope you take that in the spirit in which I’m offering it. It’s not meant to suggest that you will be deprived of love’s burning, churning pleasures; I just want to make sure you know that your best bet for experiencing burning, churning pleasures is to be dogged and devoted and disciplined in your cultivation of burning, churning pleasures.

E^hXZh (Feb. 19–March 20): In 2010, you will have

more cosmic assistance than you’ve had in a long time whenever you seek to increase your experience of pleasure. Do you want to get more sensual joy out of eating and drinking and dancing and listening to music? This is your year. Do you want to heighten your perceptiveness and find more beauty in the world and cultivate new ways to stimulate positive feelings and liberating emotions? This is your year. Do you want to intensify your orgasms and have more of them and learn how to use them to enhance your spiritual power? This is your year. And the coming weeks will be one of the best times in 2010 to move from charging up your pleasure to supercharging it. Happy Valentine Daze, Pisces!

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Legal

CALENDARIOS para presentar una respuesta escrita a maquina en esta corte. SUMMONS Una carta o una llamada tele(CITACION JUDICIAL) fonica no le ofrecera proteccion; su respuesta escrita a NOTICE TO maquina tiene que cumplir DEFENDANT: con las formalidades legales (Aviso a Acusado)] apropiadas si usted quiere que la corte escuche su caso. ALFONSO GALAVEZ usted no presenta su YOU ARE BEING SUED Si respuesta a tiempo, puede BY PLANTIFF: perder el caso, y le pueden (A Ud. le esta deman- tras cosas de su propiedad sin aviso adicional por parte dando) de la corte. FREIDELEEN LOU Existen otros requistos legales. Puede que usted CASE NO. quiera llamar a un abogado 109CV153457 inmediatamente. Si no You have 30 CALENDAR DAYS conoce a un abogado, puede after this summons is served llamar a un servicio de referon you to file a typewritten encia de abogados o a una response at this court. oficina de ayuda legal (vea el A letter or phone call will not directorio telefonico). protect you; your typewritten The name and address of the response must be in proper court is: (El nombre y direclegal form if you want the cion de la corte es) court to hear your case. Superior Court of California If you do not file your County of Santa Clara response on time, you may 191 North First Street lose the case, and your San Jose, CA 95113 wages, money and property The name, address and telemay be taken without further phone number of plaintiff’s warning from the court. attorney, or plaintiff without There are other legal require- an attorney is: (El nombre, la ments. You may want to call direccion y el numero de telean attorney right away. If you fono del abogado del demando not know an attorney, you dante, o del demandante que may call an attorney referral no tiene abogado, es) service or a legal aid office MICHAEL P. BURNS, ESQ., (listed in the phone book). 499 VAN BUREN STREET,P.O. Despues de que le entreguen BOX 3350, MONTEREY, CA, esta citacion judicial usted 939420-3350 tiene un plazo de 30 DIAS Legal & Public Notices

831-373-4131 Date: SEPTEMEBER 25/2009 /DAVID YAMASAKI/County Clerk (Actuario) /J.CAO-NGUYEN/, Deputy (Delegado) (Pub 2/10, 2/17, 2/24, 3/3/10)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #533248 The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: The Green Samaritans. This business is conducted by a Corporation. The state of Corporation: California. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on. /s/Dennis Thompson President #3238327 This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 1/20/2010. (pub Metro 1/27, 2/03, 2/10, 2/17/2010)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #532875 The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: The Grind Coffee House, 2050 Concourse Dr., #2, San Jose, CA, 95131, Five Star Patrick Tran, LLC.

This business is conducted by an Limited Liability Company. Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 10/15/09. Refile of previous file #514886 with changes /s/Joann Tran Managing Member #200929410237 This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 1/11/2010. (pub Metro 1/20, 1/27, 2/03, 2/10/2010)

Publish Your Legal Document Here Call 408.298.8000


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010 STRAIGHT DOPE

real estate Shared Housing

Notice All real estate advertised in Metro Newspapers is subject to the State and Federal Fair Housing Act, which makes it illegal to advertise any preference, limitation, or discrimination based on race, color, religion, sex, handicap, family status (the presence of children), or national origin, or the intention to make any such preference, limitation,

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Boulder Creek 40 acres. Timber Preserve Zoning. Creek frontage. Wild and serene. Off grid. Private Road. Small ridge top site. Good owner financing offered. $295,000. Shown by appointment only. Contact Deborah J. Donner, Donner Land and Mortgage Co., Inc., Broker at 408/395-5754 or www.donnerland.com

Boulder Creek 3 acres. Harmon Gulch. Creek. Private road. Quiet. Sunny possible site. Owner financing. Shown by appointment only. Contact Deborah J. Donner, Donner Land and Mortgage Co., Inc. 408/395-5754 or www.donnerland.com

Highland Way. 5 acres. Double wide with wrap around deck. NICE. Spring and creek. Sunny. Private road. Off-grid. Possible owner financing. $289,000 Shown by appointment only. Contact Deborah J. Donner, Donner Land and Mortgage Co., Inc. 408/395-5754 or www.donnerland.com

Boulder Creek 10 acres. Rough and rugged and a beautiful spot right on top! Long private bumpy road. Private road association. Good owner financing. $215,000. Shown by appointment only. Contact Deborah J. Donner, Donner Land and Mortgage Co., Inc. 408/395-5754 or www.donnerland.com

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or discrimination. State and locate laws forbid discrimination in the sale, rental, or advertising of real estate. We will not knowingly accept any advertising for real estate which is in violation of the law. All dwellings advertised are available on an equal opportunity basis.

CECIL ADAMS

[85]

Bn fjZhi^dc ^h VWdji i]Z BnZgh"7g^\\h eZghdcVa^in VhhZhhbZci# >h ^i _jhi Vc ZmVbeaZ d[ bdYZgc"YVn hcV`Z d^a hdaY Wn XdgedgViZ hddi]hVnZgh4 Dg YdZh ^i gZVaan ldg`4 8ZgiV^can V ]j\Z ^cYjhign ]Vh Wj^ai je VgdjcY i]^h iZhi# >[ ^i cZZYh id WZ YZWjc`ZY! ndjÉgZ _jhi i]Z \jn id Yd ^i# Å?^b I’m of several minds about this one—possibly as many as 16 minds, the number of personality types the Myers-Briggs people claim to be able to distinguish based on a 93-question “instrument,” or test, as the simple folk call it. My INTJ (Introversion-Intuition-Thinking-Judgment; “intuition” is abbreviated as “N” in M-B parlance) side says the whole thing is rubbish. My ENFP (Extraversion-Intuition-Feeling-Perception) self figures what the hell, it’s harmless and maybe even useful. I can’t decide, and I sure can’t keep all the four-letter personality-type labels straight. So we’ll let the different aspects of my psyche speak for themselves using the simplified Straight Dope personality code, which employs only two letters, so as not to confuse the OM, or ordinary mope. First, an overview from the AK (Anal Know-itall) Cecil: Nothing about the origin of the MyersBriggs Type Indicator, or MBTI, inspires much confidence. The test was developed starting in the 1940s by the mother-daughter team of Katherine Briggs and Isabel Myers with the goal of sorting people based on Carl Jung’s theory of psychological types. The Swiss psychiatrist made no attempt to validate his ideas via experiment. Briggs and Myers, for their part, had no expertise in psychology other than what they picked up from Jung and in consultation with people in the testing business. Nonetheless, the MBTI began attracting professional attention in the 1960s, and Consulting Psychologists Press (now CPP) began publishing it in the 1970s. After that the thing took off. My DL (Droning Lecturer) side continues: Myers and Briggs claimed their test could categorize people based on four either-or sets of characteristics, or dichotomies: ExtraversionIntroversion, Sensing-Intuition, ThinkingFeeling and Judgment-Perception. The premise of the MBTI is that in each set, you fall into one category or the other. For example, you’re either an extrovert or an introvert. You can’t be a mix of both, and your personality doesn’t change over time. My CA (Cold-eyed Analyst) self thinks this is a dubious contention. Common sense suggests that a trait like extroversion/introversion is a continuum. How outgoing we are depends partly on the situation. Me, I’m a laff riot when I’m out with the smart-ass guild, but you won’t

get a word out of me in a room full of insurance salesmen. Sure enough, when people take the MBTI multiple times, it’s not uncommon for them to flip-flop from one side of a dichotomy to the other, usually on traits where their initial score pointed only weakly in one or the other direction—in other words, where things could have gone either way. My inner AD (Amiable Doofus) interjects: so what if MBTI categories aren’t as definitive as the Myers-Briggs people claim? Tendencies toward extroversion rather than introversion, thinking rather than feeling and so on are real enough traits affecting the way we deal with the world. Sure, maybe the MBTI pigeonholes aren’t all that scientific, but they give us a handy way to talk about important personality differences. Besides, adds my VR (Voice of Reason) self, MBTI types correspond reasonably well with the basic personality traits identified by more scientific researchers. Collectively known as the five-factor model, these traits conveniently form the acronym OCEAN: openness, conscientiousness, extroversion, agreeableness and neuroticism. One study suggests the MBTI Extraversion-Introversion scale matches up statistically with the spectrum of extroversion in the five-factor model, and the Sensing-Intuition scale does likewise with openness. More modest relationships were found between the ThinkingFeeling scale and agreeableness and between the Judging-Perception scale and conscientiousness. Does your MBTI type tell your boss what kind of job you’d be best at? I wouldn’t go that far. On the other hand, does taking the test and discussing the scores make for an entertaining team-building exercise? You bet, and that’s undoubtedly why human-resources types love it. What’s not to like about an assessment that tells you you’re a born healer, mastermind or field marshal? Conversely, who wants to take a boring five-factors test and be told he’s a disagreeable, neurotic slob?

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[86]

places to live REAL ESTATE

FEBRUARY 10-16, 20109 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

their home to have a good time with their neighbors. The buildings offer a bounty of amenities under the same roof, including pools, fitness centers and hot tubs. Parties aren’t a problem either, with a barbecue area and landscaped courtyard where everyone can romp. The 88 even has a party room complete with a gourmet kitchen and a billiard table. It’s almost like living in a five-star hotel, as the property’s concierge will probably tell you. For more intimate occasions, residents can escape to their condos, all of which offer stunning views of San Jose and the surrounding hills. Inside, there are hardwood floors, granite countertops, and the most modern stainless steel appliances. Housekeeping and laundry services are available too.

BIG CITY The 88 is the tallest building in San Jose—one foot taller that San Jose’s City Hall—and offers striking views of the city and the valley.

The High Life Two new downtown towers—City Heights and The 88— win approval for FHA financing BY DANNY WOOL

W

hen the shows are over, the Shark Tank clears out, and the restaurants and clubs close, most of the folks who’ve

been playing downtown must climb in their cars

and drive home. The same thing happens in most downtowns throughout the West. But once upon a time, the urban cores of America’s cities were places where people not only worked and did business—they were places where people lived, and the services and amenities reflected that. As the cities grew upward, the people grew outward and not just in terms of their girth (but that too).

People moved to McMansions accessible by big-box-lined highways. For a while that was the new American dream, defined more by the networks than by the people that lived it. And that’s all about to change again. Lots of cities, including downtown San Jose, are going back to what a city once was—”a center of population, commerce, and culture.” The population is coming home. This is already obvious in San Jose—a city that is coming of age—where residential towers compete with office towers to provide their residents with an all-inclusive urban experience. For two of these, The 88 and City Heights, that experience just

became more accessible. Both offer luxury living in the heart of downtown. It’s a chance to live just a short walk from all the trendiest restaurants and hottest shopping spots that the city living has to offer. Theater and sports are just an elevator ride away too, making a night in town an all-nighter before rolling out of bed and down the block to the office. Teryl Jackson, sales manager for The 88, quotes classic real estate logic to explain what’s attractive about her property. “Location is one of the strongest factors for people choosing The 88,” she says. “People can literally walk out the door to find anything and everything.” Not that anyone has to leave

And here’s the best part: Both buildings were recently approved for FHA financing, meaning that residents can get a mortgage for as little as 3.5 percent. With condos going for as low as $300,000, that means that prospective first-time buyers can put down as little as $10,500 to get their dream home in the heart of a rapidly evolving downtown. There are other advantages as well. Credit guidelines are more flexible, and gift funds can be used if relatives decide to contribute to the initial down payment. All of the loans are adjustable, and they can be assumed by resale buyers whose credit is approved. It’s a buyer’s market now for new homeowners, but that same market has already slumped and has nowhere to go but up. What better place to go up than in the city’s top-rated residential towers? The number of available units is limited. Luxury homes at rockbottom prices are sure to be grabbed up by a new generation of young couples, who want to live the new American dream with all the advantages of downtown living. There’s only a limited window of opportunity to get in on the ground floor—or any of the floors.


M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

FEBRUARY 10-16, 2010

REAL ESTATE

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