Metro Silicon Valley 0912 by Weeklys

A P R I L 1 - 77,, 2 0 0 9 路 V O L . 2 5 , N O . 5 路 S A N J O S E , C A 路 F R E E

Offspring Downsized p11 Exploring Los Gatos p35

size matters Local men compete for whisker honors

Felipe F elipe Buitr Buitrago ago

p14

World Beard Champion Jack Passion

[02]

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

Samsung

HOME OF FAST, FRIENDLY, COURTEOUS SERVICE.®

1.2”

©2009 Samsung Electronics America, Inc. All rights reserved. Samsung, Touch of Color, ToC, Auto Motion Plus 120Hz and Medi@2.0 are trademarks or registered trademarks of Samsung Electronics Co., Ltd. All other product and brand names are trademarks or registered trademarks of their respective owners. Screen images are simulated.

Breakthrough LED picture quality

Ultra Slim 1.2” depth

Behold brilliant HD images, thanks to a Mega Dynamic contrast ratio and Auto Motion n Plus 120Hz™ technology.

Our most mo advanced ced HDTV technology packaged kaged into technol silhouette. a razor-thin razor

Eco-friendly Uses up to 40% less power than conventional LCD TVs.* Free of lead and mercury.

*As compared to 2008 similar size class Samsung LCD TVs in standard mode.

DO MORE IN LESS TIME !

8.9"

iPod® CLASSIC 120GB WITH GENIUS PLAYLIST FEATURE

3GB MEMORY

• Intel® Atom™ Processor N270 • Windows XP Home • 802.11b/g Wireless • 1GB Ram Memory • 160GB Hard Drive • 8.9" WSVGA Display with Webcam Built-In

• 2.5" (320x240) Color LCD With LED Backlight • Holds Up To 30,000 Songs, 25,000 iPod-Viewable Photos or Up to 150 Hours of Video • 36 Hours Of Music Playback or 6 Hours of Video Playback on Fully Charged Battery • Syncs Through iTunes With Mac or PC

PRESARIO & 250GB HARD DRIVE DESKTOP FEATURING ™ AMD Athlon 64 X2 Dual-Core PROCESSOR 4450E WITH 3GB MEMORY & 250GB HARD DRIVE

BLUE #5827653/ WHITE #5827703/ COPPER #5827683

• Windows Vista® Premium with Service Pack 1 • Super Multi-DVD Burner with Lightscribe/CD-RW

299

sr5710f #5801543 Limit 1 Per Customer

349

YOUR CHOICE SILVER OR BLACK

#5724902/#5724912

239

EACH

Apple® iMac® • • • • •

Compatible with BD/DVD/CD Formats 6x BD-R Read Speed • SATA Interface 16x DVD Write Speed BD-R/RE SL/25GB & DL/50GB $ LightScribe Disc Labeling $ 99

#5635661

139 - 40 = $

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WITH A 20" WIDESCREEN DISPLAY & 2.66GHz Intel® Core™ 2 DUO PROCESSOR

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• • • •

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1680x1050 Resolution 2500:1 Contrast Ratio 5ms Response Time DVI & Analog

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• 20” Glossy Widescreen (1680x1050) Super High Resolution TFT Display • 2.66GHz Intel® Core™ 2 Duo Processor With 6MB L2 Cache & 1066MHz FSB • 2GB of 1066MHz DDR3 SDRAM • 320GB, 7200RPM, Serial ATA Hard Drive • NVidia® GeForce 9400M Graphics With 256MB Shared Memory • Built-In Airport Extreme Wireless Networking (802.11a/b/g/n) • Slot Loading SuperDrive & Built-In iSight Camera • Mac OS X v10.5 Leopard & iLife Included

129

Apple iMac 20” 2.66GHz #5854723

1199

UPGRADES

SOFTWARE

500GB

19" LCD HDTV • 15:9 720p (1440x900) Panel • ATSC/NTSC/Qam Tuner • HDMI and PC Input Limited to Quantities on Hand. No Substitutions, and no #5876013 Rainchecks on This Item.

249

VISION BAGLESS UPRIGHT VACUUM • 12 Amps Power • HEPA Filtration • Patented Bagless Technology • Standard Hose and On-Board Tools • Headlight • 15" Cleaning Path $

Refurbished to Original Factory Specifications.

R086700 #5192666

3999

Regular Price: $69.99

SHOP ONLINE at www.FRYS.com "Advertised prices valid only in metropolitan circulation area of newspaper in which this advertisement appears. Prices and selection shown in this advertisement may not be available online at Fry's website: www.FRYS.com" METRO_WED_4/1/09_LEFT

NERO 9

42" 1080P 120Hz LCD HDTV $

• Super Slim LCD Only 1.8" Thin (Includes Tuner) #5702402

1300

2399

99 -Instant 30 - Mail-In 30 -**Upgrade 20 = $ 99

Regular Price

Savings

PC CD-ROM #5732392

Rebate

Mail-In Rebate

129 - 30 = $

KX-TG9344T #5545090

CAMPBELL 600 E. Hamilton Ave. (408) 364-3700 • FAX (408) 364-3718 CONCORD 1695 Willow Pass Road (925) 852-0300 • FAX (925) 852-0318 FREMONT 43800 Osgood Road (510) 252-5300 • FAX (510) 252-5318 PALO ALTO 340 Portage Ave. (650) 496-6000 • FAX (650) 496-6018 SAN JOSE 550 E. Brokaw Road (408) 487-1000 • FAX (408) 487-1018 SUNNYVALE 1077 E. Arques Ave. (408) 617-1300 • FAX (408) 617-1318

#5521070

6999

EACH #5528600

1999 500GB

After Instant Savings & Mail-In Rebate

SimpleDrive I USB 2.0 HARD DRIVE #5832703

Limit 1 Per Customer

5999

320GB

WITH 4 HANDSETS • Night Mode Lets You Choose Where the Phone Rings • Talking Caller ID/Alarm Clock • Block Unwanted Calls $ 99 • Dual Keypads Regular Instant Price Savings

SERIAL ATA/300

YOUR CHOICE!

ALSO AVAILABLE IN BLACK

DECT 6.0 DIGITAL CORDLESS DIGITAL ANSWERING SYSTEM

ULTRA DMA/100

#5528390 $

ULTRA DMA/100 NOTEBOOK HARD DRIVE

**Upgrade Rebate Requires Proof of Previous Ownership

160GB

99 9 9

After Instant Savings

PRICE BREAK

CONSOLE #5681281/ #5669001

STORE HOURS: M-F 8-9, Sat 9-9, Sun 9-7 Prices Good WED, APRIL 1, 2009 thru THURS, APRIL 2, 2009 Prices subject to change after THURS, APRIL 2, 2009 Limit Rights Reserved. Not Responsible for Typographical Errors. No Sales to Dealers or Resellers. Rebates Subject to Manufacturer's

Fry's Electronics Card, Discover Network, MasterCard, and Visa Card Accepted at All Fry's Locations

Specifications. Designated trademarks and brands are the property of their respective owners. Sales tax to be calculated and paid on the in-store price for all rebate products.Actual memory capacity stated above may be less. Total accessible memory capacity may vary depending on operating environment and/or method of calculating units of memory (i.e., megabytes or gigabytes). Portions of hard drives may be reserved for the recovery partition or used by pre-loaded software.

EACH

USB 2.0 PORTABLE HARD DRIVE HASSLE-FREE, SIMPLE AND EASY SOLUTION TO YOUR BACKUP NEEDS NTI SHADOW BACKUP INCLUDED #5677981 Limit 1 Per Customer

Have us Install Your In-Home Wireless Network We Can Also Set Up and Configure Parental Control Set Up Includes One PC and Security

Please see Sales Associate for more details

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

Samsung

HOME OF FAST, FRIENDLY, COURTEOUS SERVICE.®

10TH ANNIVERSARY

FREE #5782392

SAVE 50 $

BUNDLE #5730342

139

Behold brilliant HD images, s, thanks to a Mega Dynamic contrast ratio and Auto Motion ion Plus 120Hz™ technology.

Our most aadvanced vanced HDTV technology packaged into technolog a razor-thin razor-th silhouette.

Eco-friendly

99*

RATCHET & CLANK PSP ENTERTAINMENT PACK

PSP-3000 System

• Mystic Silver • 1GB Memory Stick PRO Duo • Ratchet and Clank: Size Matters Game • National Treasure 2: Book of Secrets UMD

199

EACH

PRIZE FIGHTER

VIDEO GAME #5868103/ #5868093

MAJOR MINOR'S MAJESTIC MARCH

VIDEO GAME #5868083

VIDEO GAME #5513620

VIDEO GAME #5868123

4999

LEISURE SUIT LARRY

2499

ALSO AVAILABLE IN BLACK

CONSOLE #5712782/#5784372

EACH

SILVER

GUITAR HERO METALLICA

5 99 9

BLU-RAY BOXSET #5833113

*As compared to 2008 similar size class Samsung LCD TVs in standard mode.

GUITAR HERO METALLICA

Uses up to 40% less power than conventional LCD TVs.* Free of lead and mercury.

LIMITED EDITION

GUITAR HERO: WORLD TOUR BAND KIT $ 50 OFF WITH PURCHASE OF

im Ultra SSlim th depth 1.2” de

BUY THE PSP RATCHET & CLANK ENTERTAINMENT PACK & GET 2 OF THE FOLLOWING UMD MOVIES FOR FREE. CASINO ROYALE, SPIDERMAN 3, SURF'S UP OR OPEN SEASON

399

*With the Purchase of PLAYSTATION 3 Only Regular Price $189.99

Breakthrough ty LED picture quality

GAMES

2ND DUALSHOCK 3 CONTROLLER & "THE DARK KNIGHT" BLU-RAY MOVIE ($83.98 VALUE) INSTANTLY WITH PURCHASE OF

[03]

THE MATRIX

1.2”

80GB HARDWARE

APRIL 1-7, 2009

3499

CONSOLE #5681281/ #5669001

PRICE BREAK

DUAL SHOCK ANALOG CONTROLLER

#2865634

BOX OFFICE BUST

2499

99 EACH

8 MEG MEMORY CARD

#2865654

2499

TEKKEN 5

NAMCO MUSEUM

VIDEO GAME #4319775

VIDEO GAME #4548167

BOX OFFICE BUST

VIDEO GAME #5876283 AVAILABLE TODAY BY NOON

5 GIFT CARD WITH PURCHASE $

99 5 2

AVAILABLE TODAY BY NOON

PC DVD-ROM #5876303

Low Price

DVD MOVIE #5835843

DVD MOVIE #5810003

BLU-RAY #5835833

2 59 9

BLU-RAY #5809993

AVAILABLE TODAY BY NOON

VIDEO GAME #5825993

99 4 2

VIDEO GAME #5868133

Low Price

DVD MOVIE #5840283

2 59 9

BLU-RAY #5840273

99 2 2

2 29 9

2 49 9

BLU-RAY #5855943

BLU-RAY #5835713

STORE HOURS: M-F 8-9, Sat 9-9, Sun 9-7

PPrices Good Wednesday, APRIL 1, 2009 thru Thursday, APRIL 2, 2009 Prices subject to change after Thursday, APRIL 2, 2009 Limit Rights Reserved. Not Responsible for Typographical Errors. No Sales to Dealers or Resellers. Rebates Subject to Manufacturer's

Fry's Electronics Card, Discover Network, MasterCard, and Visa Card Accepted at All Fry's Locations

2 29 9

99 2 2

1999

BLU-RAY #5855933

BLU-RAY #5833193

2 29 9

1999

BLU-RAY #5835703

BLU-RAY #5833183

THE COMPLETE LOW PRICE GUARANTEE “We Will Match Any Competitive Price.” * Before making a purchase from Fry’s, if you see a lower, instock, in-store price at a local competitor, Fry’s will be happy to match the competition’s price. “30 Day Low Price Guarantee.” If within 30 days of purchasing an item from Fry’s you see a lower instock price at a local competitor with a low price guarantee, Fry’s will cheerfully refund 110% of the amount of the competitor's low price guarantee. Or, if within 30 days of purchase, a local Fry's, or a local competitor without a low price guarantee has a lower price, Fry's will refund 100% of the difference. NOTE: All comparisons are based on price, excluding any applicable sales tax. Low price guarantee for notebook computers, microprocessors, memory, CD and DVD recorders, camcorders, digital cameras, and air conditioners is within 15 days from purchase date. To apply for Fry's low price guarantee, simply bring in your original cash register receipt and verifiable proof of a current lower price. *All comparisons are based on in-store tagged prices at the time of request, excluding sales tax. Offer good on all fresh-boxed products of the same exact model in stock at a local competitor. We reserve the right to limit this offer to one of each model. Offer does not apply to wireless phones and pagers that require a service agreement. Offer does not apply when price includes bonus or free offers or one-of-a-kind or limited-quantity offers. NOTE: Does not apply to expired ads. Fry’s ads are valid for only stores listed in the ad. Celeron, Celeron Inside, Centrino, Core Inside, Intel, Intel Core, Intel Inside, Intel SpeedStep, Intel Viiv, Intel Xeon, Itanium, Itanium Inside, Pentium, Pentium Inside, the Centrino logo, the Intel logo and the Intel Inside logo are trademarks or registered trademarks of Intel Corporation or its subsidiaries in the United States and other countries.

[04] CONTENTS

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y ;Za^eZ 7j^igV\d

Cover

Silicon Valleyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Weekly Newspaper

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

APRIL 1-7, 2009

Monday & Tuesday

2 FOR 1 MARTINIS (well only)

Wednesday

PASTA NIGHT 2 FOR 1 on any pasta dish on the menu

2 FOR 1 MARGARITAS

Thursday (well only)

Monday thru Friday

ALL NEW HAPPY HOUR 3-7

$5 APPETIZERS

SUNDAY BRUNCH

1710 W. Campbell Ave., Campbell, CA 95008 408.374.5777 www.caperseatanddrink.com

BANQUETS/CATERING CORPORATE EVENTS UP TO 250 PEOPLE

Monday & Tuesday 2 FOR 1 MARTINIS (well only)

Wednesday PASTA NIGHT 2 FOR 1 on any pasta dish on the menu

Thursday 2 FOR 1 MARGARITAS

(well only)

Thursday Night LIVE JAZZ

9pm

Friday & Saturday Nights LIVE DJ DANCING

10:30pm

90 S. Second St., Downtown San Jose 408.291.0677 www.loftbarandbistro.com

[05]

[06] LETTERS

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

BY TOM TOMORROW

reverses its takeoff direction. Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be compensatedâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;quite well, I am sureâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;if they do have to give up their existing homes, or just a bit of their yard, to HSR; and in this marketâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; and economyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not a bad deal. Jerry Grimes Willow Glen

Not Advisable Enough with the fat jokes leveled at women by the Insultâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;er, that is, the Advice Goddess! (Advice Goddess, March 18.) Of late she ridicules women who are fat, or even who just weigh more than they had. In particular, in the March 18 column, it would seem [that] being fat and female is a kind of crime against mankind, yes, man-kind. The stereotypes and the low blows are immature and demoralizing to lots of Alkonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s readers. These bits scraped from the bottom-of-the-humor barrel have become boring. She should take a look at her hostility. Kirsty MacKay San Jose

DeďŹ ning Drunk

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Knights of Nimby While I sympathize with north Willow Glen residents who fear that they will lose their houses to high-speed rail, what I hear when I hear them rant about HSR is local, parochial Nimby-ism disguised as â&#x20AC;&#x153;greater goodâ&#x20AC;? altruism (â&#x20AC;&#x153;High Speed Derail,â&#x20AC;? MetroNews, March 11). They say that the HSR Altamont

Pass route will be better for the people of the state of California, and better serve a larger percentage of the population in the Bay Area, but what theyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and their brothers-andsisters-in-spirit in Menlo Park and Athertonâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;really mean is that the Altamont Pass route will make HSR somebody elseâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s headache. Nineteen years ago, when I bought my house in Willow Glen, I could have bought a house bordering the

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Caltrain tracksâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;I looked at oneâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; and saved about $30,000 over what I eventually paid for a house of similar size, on a smaller lot, that didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t back up to the RR tracks. The North WG residents who are concerned about HSR have been enjoying smaller mortgage payments than they would otherwise, at the cost of a bit of noiseâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;less than we all experience when the wind shifts into the south and the air traffic at S.J. international

There seems to be a little apples/ oranges discussion here (â&#x20AC;&#x153;Task Force Forces the Issue,â&#x20AC;? The Fly, March 25). Alcoholism and binge drinking are different aspects of the same issue. There is a considerable difference between being liquored up and

obnoxious and ďŹ tting the legal deďŹ nition of drunk in public, which is that you must be so drunk that you present an immediate danger to yourself or others. It might be more appropriate to arrest the drunken revelers for disturbing the peace or for simple assault than for being drunk in public. But those arrests probably require a full report so the D.A. can evaluate whether to charge or not. Or the cops may just be taking the easy way out. But this task force needs to evaluate this issue on the facts, not on whether the number of arrests coincides with a particular groupâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s representation in the population. If there are a lot of drunk folks downtown, that could explain why a lot of people get arrested. Unless someone has hard evidence . . . that drunk Mexicans are being arrested and drunk white boys are not being arrested, then all this racial proďŹ ling hoopla is nonsense. As to attitude arrests, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d bet there are some. Some idiots just donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t realize that you may be able to sass back your parents, teachers, etc., but it ainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t too bright to sass back a cop with a gun. There are a lot of folks partying at night carrying way too much attitude, which is often why they get stopped in the ďŹ rst place. You get in the copâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s face, and you pretty much deserve what you get as a response. John Michael Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Connor San Jose

J!Tbxzpv The Sulker of Swat You sulked as you sat on the bench, sucking the energy out of your teammates with your whining and griping. They didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have the heart to tell you that they didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t appreciate your attitude or share your overinďŹ&#x201A;ated estimation of your skills. You could have read that by their silence and sudden interest in their socks and shoelaces if you were not so self-absorbed. But you brayed on about the coachâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s unfair treatment of you and how you were so much better than certain other players, and wonder to this day why you were not asked back to the team. So let me spell it out for you: youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re a selďŹ sh jerk, and you suck.

SEND US your anonymous rants, raves, gripes and diatribes about your co-workers, bosses, enemies or any badly behaving citizen who rankles your ireâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;or about citizens you admire. Send to: I SAW YOU, Metro, 550 S. First St., San Jose, 95113, or via email to isawyou@metronews.com.

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Urban Dig

AST WEEK, the San Jose City Council unanimously approved an official Cesar E. Chavez walkway, a five-mile route beginning downtown at the park named after the civil rights hero who founded the United Farm Workers of America. The route will continue east all the way down Santa Clara Street, almost to 680, and then south before looping back up and around to the Mexican Heritage Plaza. Aside from those two plazas, five other landmarks along the route will be designated with simple signs: (1.) The Cesar Chavez Arch of Dignity, Equality and Justice, which sits right outside the Music Building on the SJSU Campus; (2.) The Mayfair Community Center; (3.) Cesar Chavez Elementary School; (4.) Our Lady of Guadalupe Church; and (5.) Chavez’ former house on Scharff Avenue. Now, as you would expect, any time the city of San Jose decides to establish an official walkway commemorating anyone or anything, the urban-blight exploration junkie needs to kill the pain at all costs and emphasize everything the city did not decide to highlight along the prescribed course. There is so much to see and do along Santa Clara Street between downtown and the East Side, it’s hard to fathom. Of course, you have to temporarily bail from the four-wheeled cage and go tromp around for a few miles. For example, one would probably have to be on foot to discover such hidden gems as Dulceria Mi Carnaval Party Supplies at 24th and Santa Clara streets. This corner shack is by far the best place to buy piñatas anywhere in San Jose. Anything that can be made into a piñata, you’ll find it inside this place. It’s a truly crackpot find. If you keep going eastward from there, you’ll pass by quite possibly the most bizarre variety of distinct old commercial buildings and facades—fixed-up, rundown or anything in-between. You’ll discover a plethora of dime stores, cheap restaurants and other low-income mom-and-pop retail holes, comprising what seems like a completely discarded area of San Jose: a golden promenade between 24th Street and Highway 101 that time has simply forgotten. For example, Valley Saw Inc. at 1269 E. Santa Clara is always a great place to stagger into. It’s located in a cordial butterscotch-colored building that must be at least 60 years old. For bird feeders, band-saw blades and household fans, this is the place. There are fenced-off houses, functioning ’50s gas stations, even a boarded-up lumber shop—all along the same stretch. And just before you do arrive at 101, you’ll descend upon one of the most Any time the city of San precious hidden jewels anywhere in America’s 10th-largest city: Kumar’s Jose decides to establish Island Market at 1440 E. Santa Clara an official walkway St. In one little hole-in-the-wall commemorating anyone establishment, you can buy unusual cuts of meat and fish from Australia or anything, the urbanand Polynesia, as well as XXXXL-size blight exploration junkie Hawaiian shirts, fenugreek seeds, needs to kill the pain boxes of sarongs, Guam-logo hoodies, at all costs Samoan music CDs, magazines, canned goods, homemade bread and who knows what else. The current owner— my old drinking pal Suren from the Spartan Pub 18 years ago—will talk your ear off if you go in there, so allow some time. While Kumar’s provides an authentic island experience, the strip mall just east of King and Santa Clara offers a true destroyed urban-blight feel. This intersection, in fact, is a perfect place to soak in the yin-yang polar opposites of the social and economic spectrums. You have the Mexican Heritage Plaza, costing tens of millions and including the most state-of-the art theater in the whole city, and right across the street one sees a gorgeously decrepit, faded pink, infirmary-looking blighted strip mall—a splendid halfboarded-up paean to negligent landlords worldwide. At the western corner of this blighted masterpiece sits a wrecked watering hole in all its devastated glory, aptly called Richard’s Bar. Ten years ago, it was called Bob’s Lounge. I guess Bob sold it. In any event, to all urban-blight photographers: this entire mall is your Shangri-la. Go for it. The blight junkie signs off for now. Walking the walk: SiliconAlleys@metronews.com

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 MASHUP

best of the local web A roundup of news, commentary and opinion from around the valley. Opinions expressed do not necessarily reďŹ&#x201A;ect Metroâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s editorial views.

Tesla Praises Leaked Car Photos

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7 2009 NEWS

Santa Clara Valley, California

the

April 1–7, 2009

“Same as It Ever Was—But Now With Baseball.”

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Moms Tell Tots: ‘You’re Fired!’ Local children hit hard by wave of layoffs AMILIES all over Santa Clara County are reportedly laying off their children in an effort to trim household expenses. An estimated 220 local kids have been laid off from their families just within the last three months, according to county reports, and more layoffs are likely on the way. “Five years ago, when we

had Charles, things were going great,” said Mountain View mom Samantha Hodge. “Now, market forces have changed the future outlook for our family, and we’re only able to retain his older sister, Carrie.” In better economic times, Americans spent millions each year on their kids. Today, more and more families are making the

[11]

By Jessica Lussenhop

difficult decision to pare down their dependents in preparation for difficult times to come. “At some point, you just have to accept that these things are out of your control,” said Smith family spokesman Dan Smith. “We’ll keep our former kids’ names on file. They’ll have first call-backs when we’re financially capable of caring for them again.”

Some experts have blamed market forces for driving up the cost of raising kids to untenable levels. “I mean, Bugaboo strollers, organic baby food, Burberry Kids— it was getting ridiculous. The cost of caring for kids was simply inﬂated and unsustainable,” said analyst Michael Stevens. He also placed some blame on the children’s bargaining units. “My grandfather walked to school with no shoes on. These days, not only do children expect to have shoes, they want iPods, they want cell phones, they want health care,” he said. “The children got drunk. They got drunk, and now they have a hangover.” Though the emotional toll can sometimes be great, families that downsize a child save up to $20,000 annually. Funds that were previously diverted for college savings are also free to help cover more immediate costs. “The return to the family is almost immediate,” said former mother Mary Chalmes. “It’s also much quieter in here.” Most children were offered severance packages of juice boxes and Lunchables, though analysts say that children’s bargaining units were inexperienced in procuring health care or monetary compensation. Recently pink-slipped child Tommy Beckerman told reporters he can count to 5 and then collapsed into a tearful tantrum. “I want my mommy,” he said and refused to take questions. While the outlook for the large group of children is already bleak—many are lacking in job skills and have only a grade-school education—some see this as a opportunity. Local entrepreneur Craig McFarlen has already applied for the permits for his venture startup Sweet Shop Garment Factory, which he said will be staffed entirely by children. “I’m thinking outside the box. These are good jobs. These are American jobs,” he said. “If Obama is taking his economic cues from John Maynard Keynes, I’d say my &'

$124,800 Average cost of $249,180 Average cost of $6,700 Amount that can be

$6,400 Cost of a two week

raising a child to age 18 for a family earning less than $39,000 per year

vacation, with room and meals, at Spa Villa Bejar in Cuernavaca

raising a child to age 18 for a family earning more than $65,000 per year

saved in two years by dismissing a child between the ages 9 and 11

[12]

NEWS APRIL 1-7 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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inspiration is based on the work of the theories in the 1834 Poor Law. Or Charles Dickens. Other countries, like India and Bangladesh, are using this business model with tremendous success.” The creation of meaningful employment has been applauded by some, especially those troubled by the recent appearance of an encampment being called “Fort City” along the Guadalupe River. Many children, in the wake of the abrupt change in living arrangements, have pushed two chairs together and draped a blanket over the top to create a sleeping enclosure. Cryptic “tags” reading “No Grils Alowd” suggest the children may already have become involved in gang activity. Some parents have been harshly criticized for using the monies freed from the layoffs on big-ticket items for themselves. Some families were actually caught trading in their minivans for stylish

the

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convertibles. But others say this is just a sign that the parenting bubble has ﬁnally burst, something analysts like Tom Ferell saw coming years ago. “Look, these people were made false promises, by their doctors, by society, by their own parents,” Ferell said. “They thought parenthood would be fun and rewarding. No one told them what it was going to cost. No one even asked if they were qualiﬁed to become parents. They were deliberately misled.” Former dad Trip Hunt agreed. He said he was pressured into having the “nuclear family” and found himself spending thousands more each month than he’d planned for. “When my wife and I started planning to get pregnant, no one asked me if I was ready to give up my masculinity, no one asked if I could handle the responsibility,” he said. “Now, we’re living at our means, and I can stop banging the baby sitter to make myself feel better.” M

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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[14] COVER STORY

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

ROLL UPS Hbsz!IbhfoÖt!

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 COVER STORY

out Face

A champion beard or mustache isn’t born, it’s grown— and groomed and oiled and brushed . . . By Jessica Fromm Photographs by Felipe Buitrago

IZE MATTERS to Jack Passion. So do length, shape, color, fullness, softness and overall beauty. Of his beard, that is. Owner of the biggest, bushiest, brightest, reddest whiskers in creation, Passion is the reigning titleholder in the Full Beard Natural category of the World Beard and Moustache Championships. Equivalent to the Olympic gold metal in the esoteric realm of international competitive facial hair, this honor designates the 25-year-old Walnut Creek resident’s beard as the finest on the planet. “I know I have the best beard in the world,” Passion states. “It’s just beautiful hair, there’s no way around that. I’m young, I’m healthy and I take care of it. I know the game, and I’m confident in that.” In 2007, at the tender age of 23, Passion came out of nowhere to sweep the world Full Beard Natural title, upsetting the dominant German team and heralding a new era in the “sport.” He is considered by many to be the Tiger Woods of bearding. Passion doesn’t shrink from that lofty assessment: “Tiger Woods redefined the game of golf; I like to think that I redefined how to wear a beard. It’s about the most beautiful beard. They’re like a piece of art. It doesn’t have to be the most technically superior piece of art, but it’s what moves you the most, and I’ve moved the judges consistently.” Passion’s ginger facial mane will be the beard to beat when he defends his title this May at the biannual World Beard and Moustache Championships in Anchorage, Alaska—for only the second time on American soil. “Jack is pretty much our MVP,” says Phil Olsen, the founder and self-appointed captain

of Beard Team USA. “Whenever there is a beard competition, Jack wins it,” Olsen, too, is comfortable with the Woods comparison. “I think his record in beard competitions is better than Tiger Woods’ record in golf tournaments,” Olsen figures. “What’s important to remember, though, is that there are 18 different categories for competition. Jack is only in one category, but the category he is in is the one that’s the most prestigious and most competitive. Jack is definitely the superstar.” The competition will be hairy, but Passion isn’t alone. Across America, men have been patiently growing out their beards, mustaches, goatees and sideburns for years in preparation for the World Beard and Moustache Championships. The event will feature 18 separate categories, from the slender Dali to the long and pointy Musketeer to the ropelike, downward-pointing Fu Manchu to the pièce de résistance, the Full Beard Natural. Northern California is home to a handful of competitive facial hair all-stars, all of whom have been growing, brushing, clipping, conditioning and styling their fuzz for Beard Team USA. Gilroy resident Gary Hagen, owner of the 2003 World Championships Handlebar [Imperial] Moustache, has been brushing up on the competition and painstakingly curling his world-class ’stache. Olsen, perhaps the most influential man in the world of American competitive facial hair and owner of a big black beard, lives in Tahoe City. Aarne Bielefeldt and his 2-foot-long gray beard hail from Willits. New to the hirsute pursuit will be 25-year-old San Francisco resident Myk O’Connor, who will be traveling to Anchorage to fight for America’s scruff. 16

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[16] COVER STORY

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

ABOUT FACE

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Let It Grow In the 19th century, a full beard and a full belly signaled success; from Abraham Lincoln to William Howard Taft, only two presidents (Andrew Johnson and William McKinley) didn’t sport some kind of extravagant facial foliage. After the smooth Art Deco groove of the 1920s and ’30s, the beard became the domain of bikers, beats, mountain men, hippies and professors. Men who shun the razor have long had to endure comparisons to Chewbacca, Cat Stevens or ZZ Top. Similarly, those men who have manicured their beard into a mustache have to deal with the barrage of ’70s porn star and Super Troopers jokes. Lately, however, a new age has dawned

for American men, and the metrosexual preference for skin as smooth as a baby’s bottom has given way to the “I don’t give a shit anymore” recession beard. Not to be confused with the sports playoff beard, or the result of a frat-house dirty-man competition, the recession beard is the byproduct of the recently pink-slipped male who no longer has to keep up appearances. “A lot of guys go through phases where they don’t want to look so cleaned up. So, they let their facial hair grow a little bit and dress more casual,” says Bob Paez, owner of Garden Theater Barber Shop in Willow Glen. “The current thing right now is that some guys will wear a beard that’s like a Miami Vice–type of beard, where it’s like

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 COVER STORY

C A R E E R three days’ growth, and they sketch it out. Some guys have the long hairs they clean up with shears and clippers and make them look nice and uniform. That’s because a lot of guys are looking for jobs, and they have to have their groomed beards and mustaches cleaned up.” Surprisingly, even the ironic mustache has come back thick and full in the last few years, spurred by the urban hipster set.

Though the overall length of a beard or mustache is generally favored by the judges, other aspects come into play. Volume, technique and the condition of the hair are also taken into account, as are lesstangible factors: poise, personality and who just plain wears the beard the best. “The mustache made it through somehow,” Passion says. “People are like, ‘Hey, I’m Tom Selleck, check out my Pontiac GTO.’ The mustache came back ironically, with hipsters growing ironic mustaches.”

By a Whisker In these turbulent times, Beard Team USA hopes to become a major player in the world of competitive facial hair. Once the province solely of older German gentlemen with a penchant for beard play, the sport has been undergoing a revolution as its popularity has grown in the United States, principally among the younger generation. “Beard Team USA is hoping to upset the dominant German team,” Olsen says. “We’ve got a real good chance of doing so this time, because we’re holding the championships on American turf. The Germans will be there, but we’re going to

have, for sure, the biggest and strongest contingency we’ve ever had before. So far, there are 250 American competitors who tell me they are going to go.” International beard and mustache competitions got their official start in Europe more than a decade ago, as part of established European beard clubs. “In Germany, everybody is involved in a club,” Passions explains, “and having a club means that you get together and you sit on the wooden tables and drink beer and talk about whatever you’re into. “Some guys were into facial hair and doing weird styles with their facial hair, and they all congregated. They’re very serious about it; they are all old men who are very staunch. They’re like, ‘This is how it is done. This is how we do it.’” At the World Beard and Moustache Championships, taking place at the brandnew Dena’ina Civic and Convention Center in Anchorage, contenders in each category will be pitted against each other in a beard-off where the most coveted honor and glory in bearding is at stake. As at a beauty pageant, each pilose competitor will primp and prime himself for his walk around the stage past a table of judges, who include experts in the bearding world, community leaders and area celebrities. The Anchorage judging panel will consist of two mushing champions, the father of a hockey player, an Anchorage beauty school owner and past winners of the Alaskan Mr. Fur Face Competition. The contest is broken down into three divisions: Moustaches, Partial Beards and Beards. Subdivided under these three divisions, each specific category is judged against its official description. Strict requirements are laid forth by the hosting club but follow the same general guidelines from year to year. Specifications include the area of the face where the hair can be grown. Most mustache categories, for instance, spell out that only those hairs growing from within 1.5 centimeters past the end of the upper lip may be grown out. Other rules govern the use of curls or “styling aids” such as wax, gel or hairspray. “There is always controversy, and there are always arguments. You have to qualify to be in a category, and it depends on how strictly the rules are applied,” Olsen explains. Contestants whose facial tresses do not fit into a specific category can enter their division’s “freestyle” category. Freestyle is generally won by the competitor who can create the most elaborate hair construction. German champion Elmar Weisser has famously dominated the freestyle beard category for the last three years, fashioning hirsute tributes to London’s Tower Bridge 19

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APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 COVER STORY

ABOUT FACE

and Berlin’s Brandenburg Gate out of his sizable whiskers. Weisser famously travels to the world championships with his own mobile hair salon, the Friseur-Mobil, where his sister and stylist spends up to five hours on his bearding nod to famous national architecture. This year, a new category will be allowed, the Alaskan Whaler, which encourages a bushy beard but prohibits a mustache, a style made famous by old-order Amish. Though the overall length of a beard or mustache is generally favored by the judges, other aspects come into play. Volume, technique and the condition of the hair are also taken into account, as are less-tangible factors: poise, personality and who just plain wears the beard the best. In addition, it has become common for bewhiskered American competitors to don full period or national costumes within categories like the Wild West mustache, Musketeer Partial Beard and Verdi Beard, sometimes adopting Wyatt Earp or Prothos-esque personas to match their facial concoctions. This American tendency for eccentric costuming has raised eyebrows among the Germans, who prefer to dress up for competitions in formal suits or traditional outfits. “To Americans, costumes mean Halloween, and we did have a problem in Germany when we went there,” says Olsen. “A lot of the younger guys tried to look as silly and ridiculous as they could, and a few people were put off by that. The Europeans, some of them wear, very elaborate, traditional folk outfits, like lederhosen. The lederhosen that they wear are hand-stitched, with very elaborate embroidery; it’s very high quality, not something that somebody throws together at the last minute for a Halloween party.” For the last two years, Olsen, a Stanford alumnus and retired lawyer, has been using blogs, Myspace, YouTube and his official website (worldbeardchampionships.com) to recruit younger men to join and participate in the championships. He is also fluent in German, an indispensable skill when it came to convincing the Germans to let the championships take place stateside. Now, a new slew of Americans, most of them decades younger then their bristly European contenders, will be entering the fray for the first time ever this year in Alaska. “The culture around [the competition] used to be this stiff German culture,” says Passion, “and now it’s becoming this beerdrinkers culture. It’s just like guys hanging out, going ‘Fuck yeah.’ That’s becoming the attitude, and the Germans are so pissed. They want it to still be this small thing, like 200 people in a beer garden, people clapping politely, not screaming people throwing underwear onstage.” 21

Danger Zone GROWING out exceptional facial hair can be a surprisingly risky business. Gary Hagen once burned off half an inch of mustache when trying to curl it with an oldfashioned curling iron (he learned gas stoves are not compatible with vintage hair-styling tools). Bruce Roe, president of the Whisker Club and a longtime American facial hair competition participant, set his mustache on fire during a recent club function. “At our annual Whisker Club meeting last August, I was barbecuing,” Roe recalls. “I had a big flash, and in all my years of having a mustache this has never happened, but I burned up a bunch of my mustache. I lost a couple of inches in the end.” The most traumatic injury in recent beard competition memory was sustained by Willi Chevalier of Germany. A construction worker by day, Chevalier was unable to attend the 2003 World Championships after his snow-white mustache had an unfortunate run-in with a power drill, ripping open his face and almost costing him an eye. Chevalier has recovered and is expected to compete in May. Zippers are also not friendly to those with extra-embellished facial hair. Both Passion and Hagen avoid zippers like the plague. Passion says that he’s learned through trial and error what not to do with his beard. “Riding a motorcycle with my beard flapping around was pretty stupid,” he says, noting that it got so strained and knotted that he ended up loosing a lot of hair. Eating can also prove a challenge when you have a voluminous beard down to your belly button. Crumbly food gets caught in Passion’s mane. “I go through a lot of napkins. Sometimes, I have to hold it back when I’m eating, or tuck it into my shirt if I’m doing things,” he says. “I get it caught under my leg when getting into a car all the time, and [I got it caught in] the car window one time,” he admits. Passion says he’s had a lot of close calls but no major accidents yet, outside of a bad case of food poisoning that put his beard into shock. “Two years ago, I got horrible food poisoning and lost 30 pounds in like a month. I did loose a ton of beard.”

Jessica Fromm

[19]

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ABOUT FACE

TIME TRAVELER Hbsz!IbhfoÖt!nvtubdif!boe!qfsjpe!fotfncmf!sfdbmm!bo!fsb!! xifo!nfo!xfsfoÖu!bgsbje!pg!uifjs!tfdpoebsz!tfy!dibsbdufsjtujdt/

Passion’s Play Much of this newfound stateside bearding confidence comes from the eccentric charisma Jack Passion displays both on and off the bearding stage. A musician and freelance bass player, Passion has used his success on the competition circuit to propel his entrepreneurial carrier. “My beard is my brand, it’s my business. I am my day job,” Passion says. This March sees the release of his first ever E-book, titled Jack Passion’s Facial Hair Handbook, detailing his own beard-care regiment. Fans can also purchase the “Jack Passion Beard Shirt” (sold at jackpassion .com), as well as his first solo album, titled At the Opera.

Passion says that he knew his facial hair was going to be proliﬁc from a very young age: “I had huge sideburns at 13, big lamb chops. It was like instant street cred. I was the man.” He decided to grow out his beard during his freshman year at UC–Santa Cruz, where he studied philosophy (a very beardy major, he says). “I had this big thick red beard, and it was nuts; everybody loved it, and I loved it too. I was like, maybe this is a sign. This beard is like major; maybe I’m supposed to have a beard.” Passion ﬁrst heard about the World Beard and Moustache Championships in 22

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[22] COVER STORY

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

ABOUT FACE

Post your event ... for free!

2003, when it was held in Carson City, Nev. He didn’t attend, however, a decision he instantly regretted when he saw photos of the competition afterward. “I went to the next one in Berlin. I had always wanted to go to Germany, and I was, like, I can tell my grandkids I went to a world beard championship, how cool is that? I ended up getting third place in Full Beard Natural. Everyone was, like, who is this 21-year-old American kid?” Two years later, at the 2007 Brighton, England, World Championships, Passion finally won the main event. Dressed in a blinding-white tuxedo to extenuate his gingery chin fire, he took first place in Full Beard Natural, narrowly beating out Sweden’s Gunnar Rosenquist, dressed as a wizard. “I knew that it was going to be me and one other guy. It was going to be because his was twice as long as mine but his was thin and gray. He just didn’t have the passion,” says Passion. Passion’s family, whom he describes as “’60s San Francisco cowboy hippies,” have always been supportive of his gargantuan beard, and even more so since he started winning competitions with it. A born performer, Passion admits that he got into beard growing for the attention. He says that it also works as a great bullshit filter. “I love to talk to people and to meet new people, so it’ s like having a conversation starter, by all means. It’s not like bad attention either; I’m making people happy,” he says. “I can walk into a room, and if somebody is going to approach me to talk about my beard, so many barriers are broken down already. It’s like a flag that waves a little bit and lets you know something about what I’m about.” Passion says the beard is also a good way to meet women: “For girls, it’s a great conversation starter. I think of it as the hook. Once the hook is set, we’re having fish tonight.” “It’s kind of like Sex Panther cologne: 60 percent of the time it works 100 percent of the time. There are definitely certain types of girls that are way more into beards then others. At 2 in the morning, you get the girls who understand the latent thing with facial hair. It’s a secondary sex characteristic; they’re like ‘Oh, I need that. That’s what a man is.’ Or, they just want to cross a beard guy off their list.” But what exactly makes Passion’s beard so exceptional? “Obviously his length, but that’s not all there is to it,” Olsen explains. “It’s overall quality, I think, the color, the fullness, the consistency of it and the fact that it’s a sold shape. It doesn’t sort of straggle out at the end, like you sometimes see. I think that Jack has a certain quality about him that allows him to carry it well. But, there are a lot of people out to get him.” 24

Beardism ONE OF THE biggest challenges in the world of beards is the not-so-latent social beardism in Western society, says Jack Passion. “Facial hair has been is style since the dawn of mankind,” he says. “But there are so many beard stereotypes that are just horrible, that ruin it. The thing is, men want to experiment with their facial hair, but they feel like they can’t. They think, ‘What happens if I let this go, am I going to be a biker, a wizard or a hippie?’ Beards have got this reputation.” Passion says the fear culture of shaving started during the Depression, when companies like Gillette played on people’s doubts. “People wanted to be clean and hygienic so they could get work, so we have this fear culture started around shaving. Shaving is a great business because you have to keep buying shaving cream, you have to keep buying razors, and as soon as we tell you you’re ugly, you’re going to listen to us,” he says. “Mainstream culture really lost a lot of the art of grooming.” “Bearded people don’t have a voice,” says Nathaniel Beard, the bass player of the Beards, an Australian folk-rock band that will be playing at the opening-night gala of the Anchorage World Beard and Mustache Championships. “All our lyrics are about beards—the trials and triumphs of living a bearded life.” “We are here to represent the bearded man who is told by his work or his wife or his friends to shave. There’s a certain level of kindred understanding amongst the bearded. I’ll walk down the street and pass a fellow beardwearer, and we’ll just nod at each other knowingly, because we both know that having a beard in this world is hard work. The Beards are here to commend the bearded and inspire the beardless.” Nathaniel Beard said he thinks the reasons there should be more beards in the world are obvious. “You wouldn’t cut off your genitals—so why cut off your beard?” he asks. “Since the West started its ﬁxation with shaving, we’ve had two World Wars, two great depressions, AIDS and innumerable natural disasters. Coincidence? I think not.”

Jessica Fromm

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

ABOUT FACE

Passion says that the most important factor in growing a good beard is diet. “You’ve got to eat well to grow the beard out well. This is like a time line; I can look at this and tell you when I was healthy and when I was not healthy,” says Passion. “Look at most men who grow beards and how they eat. You’ve got a lot of fat guys, so they’re eating a lot and that’s why they grow a lot of hair. But simple healthy foods make for a good body and are good for hair.” He also says to avoid complicated, chemical-laden leave-in hair treatments and stay as natural as possible, letting the beard do what it wants to do. “I keep it cleaned. I keep it conditioned. I put some oil on it every once and a while, and I stay after the split ends. [I] brush it, and that’s it,” Passion details. “I see these people at competition put all this shit in their beards and mustaches. It just ruins it; it’s just so bad. You don’t have to do that.” Passion expects the event in Alaska to be the biggest international facial hair competition ever. He’s totally secure that he can uphold his title: “America is blowing up. I’m conﬁdent, I don’t think I have any real competitors. There’s a lot more people competing this time, but I’m not trippin’. None of these guys know what I know.”

Hair Pretzel When Gary Hagen became the world champion in 2003, his mustache measured 10 inches from tip to tip, curving in slightly at the ends. The 56-year-old Gilroy resident was the ﬁrst American to ever win gold in the handlebar mustache category, known as the “Imperial mustache” in Europe. Working on his mustache since 1994, Hagen has spent the last ﬁve years seeing how big he can get it to grow and how perfect and symmetrical he can make it curl. Now, having produced a 20-inch-long masterpiece, Hagen is ready to throw his mustache in the competition ring once again. “I really believe I’m the portrait of an American champion,” he says, “not because I have a title, and not because I have a trophy, but because I went from a standard handlebar and taught myself how to do a really long, curly handlebar mustache, without a mentor and without an instruction manual. It was brutal to learn how to do.” For competitions, he can spend a halfhour or more shaping his mustache with his own secret concoction of hot wax, which keeps it stiff and the curl tight. “I’m not a prima donna with it, though I can be for special events. I usually do the slap-it-together, go-to-work mustache. I can’t spend the time every day,” says Hagen. “If I’m feeling lazy or tired, I don’t always do it as good as I could. Then, if I get compliments on it, I feel guilty, because I know I could have done better on it. I’m

hypercritical of it; I usually start the day with ‘The reason I don’t like it today is . . .’ but that propels me to make it better.” Hagen, a checker at a Safeway in Morgan Hill since 2000, has gained a reputation around South County as the “mustache guy,” the talkative, chipper checker with the great big ’stache. “The public are my cheerleaders. They would give me all these great accolades; it cheers me on to my perimeters of awesome,” Hagen says.

‘I really believe I’m the portrait of an American champion, not because I have a title, and not because I have a trophy, but because I went from a standard handlebar and taught myself how to do a really long, curly handlebar mustache, without a mentor and without an instruction manual. It was brutal to learn how to do.’ He found growing his mustache for competition so challenging that he developed the “Gary Manifesto” to encourage himself to keep going: “I rise up to the challenge of waxing one of the world’s greatest handlebar mustaches. I am forceful and fearless. I am tough and tenacious. I will create a masterpiece out of my mustache and my life.” Of course, sporting a handlebar mustache is against Safeway’s employee policy, and Hagen has gotten grief for his exceptional mustache. He has had managers over the years tell him to cut it off, though he has resisted. He says his current boss is OK with it, and Hagen loves the reaction he gets.

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 COVER STORY

“It’s not every day that somebody mentions it, but it’s often and constant. It’s only a matter of time before somebody goes off about my mustache,” he says. During the holidays, Hagen has even been known to hang small Christmas tree ornaments off his mustache. He has also dyed it green for St. Patrick’s Day and stuck small ﬂags in it for the Fourth of July. “The most satisfying time I made somebody laugh with ordainments in my mustache was at Stanford Hospital,” Hagen recalls. “I was walking around the cafeteria after donating blood. This lady started laughing, and I found out later it was probably one of the worst days of her life. I ran into her on a park bench out front of the building when I was leaving, and she said she had just found out her son might not live. I’ve never wanted to be a standup comedian, but it’s really satisfying making people laugh, because when they laugh, you laugh too. It’s a win-win thing.” Still, even he is shocked at the reaction his mustache gets. On a recent shopping excursion, a man came up to Hagen and complimented him on his mustache. “I started bragging; I said, ‘Oh, actually, I’m the ﬁrst American to pick up the title of world champion of the handlebar mustache.’ The guy goes, ‘Oh, really, can I see your hand?’ I didn’t see it coming, but he bowed downed to me and kissed my hand there in the store. I was so embarrassed.” Hagen says he also gets the occasional smart-ass “nice mustache, I wanna sit on it” comment, but in general, people just want to know how long he has been growing it out. The 2009 World Beard and Moustache Championships will be Hagen’s second time in an international contest. Unable to afford to travel to Europe to attend competitions, he couldn’t defend his handlebar mustache title at the 2005 and 2007 championships. He has been looking forward to Alaska for years and has plans to dress up as a turn-of-the-century gentleman to match his mustache’s oldtimey style. “I call the contest ‘Old men gone wild,’” says Hagen. “It’s like meeting your brothers. You walk into a room, and everybody looks like you. It’s kind of like coming home. It’s hysterically funny, kick-in-thepants fun. Older men can be creative and wild, too. It’s a good brotherhood, and the American handlebar mustache is an American classic.” However, Hagen worries that because he has expanded the amount of hair in his mustache to a few centimeters below his mouth, in an effort to “supercharge it,” the technicalities of the handlebar (or Imperial) mustache category may force him to enter the Freestyle Partial Beard category. “If they put me in freestyle, I have no

chance because those guys are really big,” he ﬁgures, citing German champ Willi Chevalier and his octopus mustache, dubbed the “hair pretzel,” as his biggest competition.

Gearing Up There has been a lot of buzz on cyberspace that the Caribou Barbie herself, Sarah Palin, will be a judge at the upcoming championships in Anchorage. David Traver, vice president of the South Central Alaska Beard and Moustache Club, said that he has personally spoken to Palin about the event, though she has not officially conﬁrmed yet. “I’ve met her at a couple of veterans functions and talked to her at a hockey game, too. I started to talk to her once [about the World Championships], and she said, ‘Oh, you’re with the beard team,’ and I said yes, and she said, ‘Oh, nice, I heard it’s coming to Anchorage.’ I thought that it was cool that before I even got to say anything she already knew what it was. So she’s aware of it, that’s cool,” says Traver. Passion says that since the bar for American facial hair has been raised, he worries that some people might try to cheat in Anchorage. “I won’t put it past people at this one, because now the proﬁle is bigger, and some many people might try to mess with it because there are holes in it. Gary Hagen has been talking about technicalities, and I think that’s going to be a big issue. So many people are going to try to bend rules and do stupid things. But a beard weave is pretty easy to spot.” “With competitive subcultures, there’s spelling bees and dog shows, but I think in the beard sense, they’re all characters,” Passion adds. “Anybody who’s going to go to a facial hair competition’s got to be pretty unique.” To the villous victors go the bragging rights. As Passion says, “Gentlemen, start your beards.” M

To Participate THE WORLD BEARD AND MOUSTACHE CHAMPIONSHIPS will take place May 20–24 in Anchorage, Alaska. Those who want to become part of Team Beard USA or participate in the championship event have until the day before competition starts to sign up. Everybody is accepted, from beginning recession bearders (the groomed Verdi might be a good option) all the way to the advanced Freestyle Full Beard, where hair sculpture is the focal point. To ﬁnd out more, visit www.akbeardclub. com and www.beardteamusa.org.

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APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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[26] SPORTS

SLIPPIN’ AND SLIDIN’ Wfufsbo!Cpp!Cpp!Cpc!Tdbmmz!)Op/!82{*!xbt!pof!!

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Tight Turns MOTOCROSS has the jumps, Moto GP has the speed and the turns, and ﬂat-track racing has the power slide. Now, we all know from childhood that the power slide is one of the coolest things anyone could do, which is why, after a dormant period, the ﬂat-track power slide is making a comeback with a large following. Proof of this trend was seen last Saturday (March 28) at the Santa Clara County Fairgrounds, where riders came from far and away to test their skills on bikes that are designed for the sole purpose of sliding into every turn. Most of the bikes in these events use only one brake and one gear. The race is run counterclockwise on a tight oval track. The turns are taken at very high speeds, which means leaning so far into the turn that the rear of the bike whips out. The rider’s left foot slides on the ground to stabilize the turn. Some riders go as far adding a small piece of extra fuzzy carpeting to their left boot to insure a smooth slide. All of this is done with up to 12 riders on the track racing elbow to elbow—certainly not a sport for the faint at heart, but once it grabs you it doesn’t let go. Take Boo Boo Bob Scally, for instance. He is one of the many riders that make up the senior class of racers over the age of 50; he has been leaving more than just a mark on the track for decades. Felipe Buitrago

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

APRIL 1-7, 2009

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APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 SPORTS

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sfstation.com

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[30] EVENTS

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

APRIL 1-7, 2009

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APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 STYLE

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The Eyes Have It D

IVERSITY in eyewear is everywhere this season. People are being more playful with sunglasses, and it’s easy to stay on trend, whether you shell out $450 for a pair of IDB ;DG9s or buy some cheap plastic drugstore frames for $5.99. Statement spectacles, like the recent trends of statement shoes, glitzy handbags and chunky jewelry, are big for summer. Last year was all about the revival of the G6N"76C L6N;6G:G, and those nostalgia-laced frames are still overwhelmingly popular. Another vintage-tinged option is the IJM:9D by A: HE:8H. In the style of the old Ray-Ban 8AJ7B6HI:G, these were even the eyewear of choice for Malcolm X. DA>K:G E:DEA:H also just launched some retro-styled black-on-black sunglasses. Named the ODD:N, these classic-looking limited-edition frames were made in collaboration with Hollywood starlet Zooey Deschanel. Another sunglass trend that started last year and

isn’t going away is the brightly colored plastic look. Priced high or low, the key is humor, as if the glasses just hopped out of a cereal box. Italian eyewear manufacturer HJE:G has been championing this look with the array of neon hues seen in its K>DI:8= ;A6I ' and 7A68@ ;A6H= frames. Additionally, Le Specs offers some cool space-age shades, like its G:7:A, featuring flossy crystal-blue plastic and gradient lenses. Oversized wraparounds or aviator are also a tempting choice. The HE:8I6IDG by 9>I6 are big Hollywood-size sunglasses, perfect for blocking the flashes of paparazzi bulbs. The aviator is a unisex style with a suave, sporty flare. Traditionally wire-framed and highly reflective, a la Tom Cruise in Top Gun, the aviator has taken on a thick, Elvis Presley–esque girth this spring in the B>8=6:A @DGH B6?DG86 6K>6IDG. Jessica Fromm

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Get ﬁt at the APJCC in Los Gatos! Just $1 a day in April*

• 20,000 square foot, state-of-the-art fitness center • More than 60 group fitness classes, free for members • Tennis & Aquatics included with every fitness membership 14855 Oka Road Los Gatos, CA 95032 408.356.4973 membership@svjcc.org www.svjcc.org * $1-a-day-in-April offer is available when purchasing a Center membership by 4/30/09. Must be age 18 or older. Certain conditions & restrictions apply.

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 SPECIAL

[35]

Exploring ...

A Metro Special

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OUR TOWN

WHILE ALMOST EVERY province in Silicon Valley has long since citified, Los Gatos has held out as one of the area’s last towns (don’t forget Los Altos Hills). Haters will no doubt say it’s all snoot and mirrors, an extra dab of pretension for a famously upscale zip code. But for the people who hustle the reservoir walk every day, it’s a different story. There’s an old-school feeling of community here that makes township feel like more than a put-on. Los Gatos is the land of Stop and Chat. There’s a circuit that runs around not just the creek trail but across Main Street, up Santa Cruz Avenue and back down University, and anyone on it is fair game for conversation. At its core, meanwhile, is a heart of pure caffeine. The Los Gatos Coffee Roasting Company, brewing since 1982, is the town’s unofficial city hall, an always-buzzing hub for local businesspeople, bicyclists, artists, shoppers, strollers and everyone else. And its owner, Teri Hope, is a townie legend. Take an informal poll of how many independent L.G. business owners say they got a boost from her in the beginning and it becomes clear why no one here questions the audacity of Hope. But she isn’t the only one—that same dynamic of community members aiding and abetting other community members is what this town is built on. Los Gatos Gourmet owner Faun Skyles goes to the French Cellar for her Francophile wine needs, French Cellar owner Jay Bruian goes to Los Gatos Gourmet for peanut butter. And yet, L.G. isn’t the locals-only clique it’s sometimes made out to be. From its thriving nightlife to weekend walks downtown, it’s a top Silicon Valley destination because anyone can get a piece of that small-town feel on any given visit—no exercise outfit required. M

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LOS GATOS DINING

The Finer Things W

ITH ITS MOST recent coups in the Michelin Guide and on TV’s Iron Chef, Los Gatos is hotter than ever as a dining destination. Here are Stett Holbrook’s picks for eating around town:

on the Run offers a fresh lineup of nigiri, too. Nobu says he only has a few more years left before he hangs up his apron and moves back to Japan, so enjoy the restaurant while it lasts. 114 N. Santa Cruz Ave., Los Gatos; 408.354.1125.

Sushi on the Run Tiny, eight-stool

Nick’s on Main It seems like Nick’s has

Sushi on the Run is the embodiment of the saying “the customer is always right.” While you won’t ﬁnd the fanciful sushi rolls of chef/owner Nobu Eguchi’s native Japan, the little sushi counter is a Los Gatos institution because of its customercreated maki rolls such as the Rikki’s Rolls Royce Roll (eel, yellow tail, avocado, cucumber, scallions, peanuts and tobiko) and Pat’s Homerun (eel, macadamia nuts and special sauce). For traditionalists, Sushi

been crowded since the day it opened last spring. And why not? Well-known Los Gatos chef Nick Difu has created a crowdpleasing menu of upscale comfort food with dishes like the supremely delicious Prince Edward Island mussels in a spicy, Thaiinspired broth and cilantro butter; and Loch Duart salmon and Dungeness crab and the marinated and roasted rib eye. The dining room is tight and gets noisy, but the crowds of regulars make it feel like an ongoing

party with Nick acting as the happy host. 35 E. Main St., Los Gatos; 408.339.6457.

Manresa In addition to three Michelin stars, Manresa’s David Kinch recently added Iron Chef to his long list of accolades. While that’s impressive, what’s more compelling is that the veteran chef continues to break new ground at his singularly delicious Los Gatos restaurant. Kinch gets almost all his produce from a biodynamic garden in the Santa Cruz Mountains, a move that has led him to embrace a more vegetable-driven menu that takes diners to new worlds of ﬂavor and hedonism that must be tasted to be believed. With new chef de cuisine Jean Paul Carmona at his side, Kinch says Manresa’s best days are still to come. It may be harder 39 Exploring Los Gatos 36

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EXPLORING LOS GATOS 35

LG’S BIGGEST HAPPENINGS

The Main Events T

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HESE FIVE EVENTS are always ﬁrst and foremost on the Los Gatos calendar:

Jazz on the Plazz “It’s like a county fair, except the nachos have brie, the corn dogs are made of veal and there’s chardonnay instead of lemonade.” Listeners of his KRML-AM (1410) jazz show won’t be surprised that Michael Jacobi can’t stay totally serious when describing Los Gatos’ premier music event, but as long as he keeps bringing great musicians to Plaza Park, he can describe it however he wants. Jacobi is co-executive director of Jazz on the Plazz, along with Los Gatos Coffee Roasting Company’s Teri Hope. Together they’ve been bringing world-class artists to Los Gatos for free concerts on Wednesday evenings in July and August since 2003—to huge crowds. “It’s always impressed me just how hip the Los Gatos music is,” says Jacobi. This year’s series kicks off with Dennis Rowland, who most recently released a vocal tribute to Miles Davis, on June 23. It continues with Mark Winkler on July 1, jazz guitarist Mimi Fox on July 8, Karrin Allyson on July 15, John Proulx on July 22, Kathleen Grace on July 29, Nestor Torres on Aug. 5, Lara Price on Aug. 12, the Monterey Jazz Festival High School All Stars on Aug. 19 and closers Cleo Laine and John Dankworth on Aug. 26. Like everyone else, the series is feeling the pinch, and Jacobi says they’ll soon be announcing new ways for the community to keep free jazz in the park. For sponsorship or other information, call 408.483.3353.

The Great Race Unchallenged in the category of strange beginnings for Los Gatos events is the Los Gatos Rotary Annual Great Race, better known by its shortened moniker. The Great Race actually started in 1978 as a competition between two entire communities, Los Gatos and Saratoga. There were two starting lines: one in Los Gatos with a finish line in Saratoga, and vice-versa. Both were let out of the gate at the same time; whichever place got their first runner through rival territory fastest was said to be the winner. We cannot make this stuff up. There’s only one starting line and one finish line now, and the race is open to everyone, but there’s still a little bit of cross-town oneupmanship: L.G. and Saratoga compete for which has the most registrants. This year’s event is April 26; the four-mile run begins in Saratoga and ends on North Santa Cruz Avenue in Los Gatos. For info, go to www.losgatosrotary.org.

Dammit Run Lots of people do Los Gatos’ famed Reservoir Walk. But not

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everyone can do the Dammit Run. Starting off deceptively easy at Los Gatos High School, the ﬁve-mile course converges with the Los Gatos Creek Trail and then heads ever upward to the Lexington Reservoir, ﬁnally looping around back down to the school. It’s one of the more challenging courses among in the area, and yet last year’s race drew 700 runners. This year’s run is Aug. 8; for information call Athletic Performance, 408.354.7365.

Cat’s Hill Classic Bicycle Race What the Dammit Run is to foot races, the Cat’s Hill is to bike courses: tough. The Los Gatos Bicycle Racing Club has made this one of the oldest community-organized cycling events in the country; this will be its 36th year. The race gets its name from the most grueling section of the course: a climb up Cat’s Hill on Nicholson Avenue at a 23 percent incline. The 2009 Cat’s Hill Classic will be held May 2; call 408.978.8200 for more information.

Holiday Tree Lighting Silicon Valley’s main event for the holiday season. Los Gatos’ yuletiding begins with the lighting of the town tree in Plaza Park on the ﬁrst Friday in December. Thousands of people pack the streets every year—in L.G., everything stops for the tree lighting. The next day, Los Gatos hosts a Children’s Holiday Parade on the ﬁrst Saturday of December, and then Santa starts showing up in Plaza Park for the three Sundays before Christmas. For information, call 408.354.8700, ext. 221. M

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 SPECIAL

WINE SCENE

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HEN Cin-Cin first opened, wine director Lisa Rhorer had all the answers about the wine bar’s selection of bold, eclectic and ecofriendly wines from around the world. But that isn’t what she was asked. “For the first few months, people were saying, ‘Where’s my cab?’” she remembers. “It took a while.” But in less than a year, she’s seen that attitude change. For example, Cin-Cin’s two most popular wines by the glass are not cabernet EDGE OF THE GLASS !Djo.Djo!xjof!ejsfdups!Mjtb!Sipsfs!ibt! or the ubiquitous buttery gpsnfs!dbcfsofu!ibsemjofst!fyqboejoh!uifjs!ipsj{pot/ chardonnay, but the South African varietal pinot tage and a Chateau Coufran food and wine, with an organic orchard and Bordeaux. And she’s trying to rebuild the garden, and even honeybees. overly sweet reputation of riesling with a “My love in wine is pinot noir, and they’re German variety that hits refined notes of doing a fantastic estate pinot,” says Skyles. peach and lychee. Running Los Gatos Gourmet, Skyles “I find that people are getting more has seen the demand locally for organic open to the idea of trying something new,” ingredients, and will bring the same sensibility she says. to Regale’s full commercial kitchen. Julie Hauck, a co-owner of the “Los Gatos is very health conscious. Wine Cellar who has overseen its wine It’s a very active community,” she says. program for the last 18 years, says palates “And what is more healthy than eating in Los Gatos have indeed evolved over wholesome food?” M that time. The area’s top wine minds agree, however, that the mix of sophisticated tastes with hard economic times has created a tough new demand: distinctive wines at an affordable price. “People are a bit more experimental lately,” says Hauck. “But with the economy, they’re also a little conservative.” Los Gatos’ cork culture succeeds in Cin-Cin supplying worldliness without the off-the368 Village Lane, Los Gatos chart pretension one finds in wine country 408.354.8006 to the north. “The great thing about this crowd is The French Cellar they’re very chill about it. It’s not your 32 E. Main St., Los Gatos classic snobby wine drinker crowd,” says 408.354.0993 Luke Donigian, wine buyer for Los Gatos Los Gatos Gourmet Gourmet. 109 W. Main St., Los Gatos “People are more comfortable with their 408.354.5440 tastes,” says Hauck. “I think in our area people are well-traveled—and they visit Regale Winery and Vineyard more wineries.” 24040 Summit Road, Los Gatos They don’t have to go far, since Los Gatos 408.353.2500 is home to wineries like Testarossa, David Bruce, Silver Mountain and more. The The Wine Cellar 50 University Ave., Los Gatos newest is Regale Winery, on Summit Road 408.354.4808 by Burrell School. Set to open this month, the Regale has recruited Los Gatos Gourmet owner Faun Skyles to set up a culinary program. The winery will emphasize both

Five Places to Have The Los Gatos Wine Experience

Exploring Los Gatos 39

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EXPLORING LOS GATOS 37 MAPPING THE MENUS 35 ;Za^eZ 7j^igV\d

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THE KING IS ALIVE! !Boe!ibvoujoh!

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to afford it these days, but a promise like that is not to be taken lightly. 320 Village Lane, Los Gatos; 408.354.4330.

Trevese Restaurant and Lounge Along with Manresa’s David Kinch, Trevese chef Michael Miller is one of Los Gatos’ culinary masterminds. Miller’s inventive and highly personal take on modern American cuisine has made the restaurant one of Silicon Valley’s destination restaurants. Diners can choose from an a la carte menu or an inspired six-course tasting menu. Recent selections include pork cheeks, grits and slow roasted ﬁgs and braised short ribs with a potato gallette and crispy morel mushrooms. Located in the historic Coggeshall mansion, Trevese restaurant exudes luxury and warmth with the expert service to match—and a hideout of a bar in the back. 115 N. Santa Cruz Ave., Los Gatos; 408.354.5551.

Southern Kitchen Is breakfast the most important meal of the day? After a morning meal at Southern Kitchen I’d say yes. The diner is an outpost of Southern cooking with crowds waiting at the door on weekends. All egg breakfasts come with a choice of hash brown or grits. Get the grits. The creamy, decidedly corny mush is as good as it gets outside of Dixie. And to really start the day right, order a biscuit smothered in country gravy. That’s the breakfast of champions. While it’s a revered

breakfast spot, the Southern Kitchen is a solid choice for lunch as well. Check out the hot turkey platter or fried green tomatoes. 27 E. Main St., Los Gatos; 408.354.7515.

Steamer’s Grillhouse It seems like it’s been around forever (though it opened in 1979), but Steamer’s remains a perennial popular choice for Los Gatos dining because they’ve figured out that fresh seafood, steaks and pasta, simply prepared, never go out of style. Beyond Steamer’s upscale strip-mall exterior, the décor transforms to resemble a Mediterranean resort. A terra-cotta paint job and comfortable booths are supported by koa wood and stenciled glass that resembles fluid ocean waves. Rounded out by a great oyster bar and long list of specialty cocktails, Steamer’s is a Los Gatos institution. 31 University Ave., Los Gatos; 408.354.2722. The Wine Cellar The Hauck family has owned the Wine Cellar since 1990, and celebrated the restaurant’s 40th anniversary in 2006. It’s the only remaining original tenant of the Old Town shopping center, but like nearby Steamer’s, the venerable restaurant has managed to stay fresh with a major remodel and an evolving menu. The restaurant still serves fondue as it has done since 1966, but the menu now includes dishes like panko-crusted abalone, crab cakes, seared ahi and Painted Hills grilled rib eye steak. As befits a restaurant with a name like the Wine Cellar, there’s a

lengthy wine list and diverse selection of wines by the glass. There’s a full bar, too. 50 University Ave., Los Gatos; 408.354.4808. C.B. Hannegan’s C.B. Hannegan’s has long been a great place to go for a drink. The lively, well-stocked bar has been a L.G. mainstay for party people since in opened in 1980. For aﬁcionados of single malt whisky, C.B. Hannegan’s has one of Silicon Valley’s premier lists of the fabled dram. Such is the restaurant’s status as a Silicon Valley institution that it was even mentioned in thinly veiled form in Los Gatos resident Rudy Rucker’s cyberpunk novel The Hacker and the Ants: “I went around the corner to an Irish bar called D.T. Finnegan’s, a publike space with green carpets, dark wood wainscoting, and antique stained glass windows. The bartender knew me, but I sat at a table with my back to him and with my billed cap pulled down so he wouldn’t notice me. His name was Tommy.” But C.B. Hannegan’s is more than a watering hole. It also offers an eclectic menu that includes pizza, steaks and burgers, pub classics such as shepherd’s pie and Guinness stew and nightly specials like seared scallops and prawns over creamy polenta. 208 Bachman Ave., Los Gatos; 408.395.1233. M Exploring Los Gatos 40

FEW BUCKS can still get you some great food, even in Los Gatos. Here are some of the town’s best cheap eats.

Happy Hound While McDonald’s and other fast food chains are forever trying to reinvent themselves to stay relevant and retain customers, the Happy Hound remains dependably old school. Best known for its burgers and great fries, the Happy Hound also makes a satisfying hot dog. 15899 Los Gatos Blvd., Los Gatos. 408.358.2444. Main Street Burgers Main Street Burgers sets out to create a better, healthier burger joint, and they deliver. The delicious groundchuck burgers are made from humanely raised cattle fed on a mixture of grass and grain, and the thin and crisp fries are fried in transfat-free oil. 20 S. Santa Cruz Ave., Los Gatos. 408.354.1881. Los Gatos Diner It’s long on 1950s kitsch, but fans of this dependable diner like it that way. And they also like the great burgers and shakes and “blue plate” specials like roast turkey with stufﬁng and gravy and chicken fried steak. Chocolate egg creams, too. 235 Los Gatos–Saratoga Road, Los Gatos. 408.354.4886. Andale Mexican Restaurant Andale is a Los Gatos–style taqueria. That means great burritos and tacos made with premium ingredients as well as specialty items, like the braised spare ribs carnitas and watercress salad with guajillo chile vinaigrette, toasted pumpkins seeds and cotija cheese. Real margaritas, too. 21 N. Santa Cruz Ave., Los Gatos. 408.395.8997. M

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EXPLORING LOS GATOS 39

STYLE SECRETS

The Los Gatos Look ;Za^eZ 7j^igV\d

OS GATOS locals are known for dressing sharp, whether out on the town or just coming from the gym. Here are 10 spots that keep them looking that way:

Alta Fine Contemporary Clothing Alta offers a serene atmosphere for mature ladies to ﬁnd sophisticated fashions. No blaring music, see-through frocks or snooty employees here; just classy, comfortable clothing for women of all shapes, sizes and styles. Tunic-style pant sets, blazers and tasteful screen T’s can be found on the racks. The store also sells a large array of handcrafted scarfs, shawls, jewelry and other accent items. 130 N. Santa Cruz Ave., Los Gatos; 408.354.0069.

Bella Rosa Boutique This is where Paris Hilton would shop if she cruised downtown Los Gatos on a Saturday afternoon. The large store is decorated with pink Romanesque columns, overstuffed fuchsia armchairs and zebraprint rugs. Their selection ranges from the simple basics to downright girly frocks, with feminine brands like Milly and Juicy Couture. The boutique has a small selection of ruffled heels and jewelry, and their extensive designer jeans selection has been marked down significantly. 145 N. Santa Cruz Ave., Los Gatos; 408.354.4206. Besos Why would shoppers even think about hitting up the Victoria’s Secret when they can step into Besos Lingerie and Sleepwear in Los Gatos and get gorgeously lacy unmentionables without the cheap mall atmosphere or blown-up prices? Easy on the pocketbook (especially for Los Gatos), Besos has a fantastic selection of cute corsets, teddies, bras and panties sets. There is a small sleepwear section in back, and the changing rooms are right by the register, perfect for shouting out for a different size. N. Santa Cruz Ave., Los Gatos; 408.395.6529. Bump Maternity Bump offers modern clothing for almost-moms who don’t want to walk around in a muumuus for nine months. From pretty, flowy dresses to nursing bras, owners Lisa and Tom Szabo have hand-selected every piece of apparel in their Los Gatos store for style and comfort. The staff have a knack for helping hard-to-fit moms. Bump also delivers some sass, with dark-wash maternity jeans from brands like J & Company and Chip & Pepper,

SENSE AND SENSIBILITY !Mfb!Txfotpo-!nbobhfs!pg!Bmub!Gjof!Dpoufnqpsbsz!Dmpuijoh-!! tipxt!pgg!uifjs!op.opotfotf!bqqspbdi/

and pregnancy T’s with slogans like “Hormonal” and “What’s kickin’.” 318 N. Santa Cruz Ave., Los Gatos; 408.399.2220.

Infiniti Boutique Infiniti is as close as one can get to a hipster shop in Los Gatos. Staffed by a team of ultracool stylistas, this narrow boutique is packed from ceiling to floor with edgy, hardto-find clothes and accessories from Japan and Europe. A dress adorned with a porcupine? They have it. Earrings fashioned to look like grenades? Check. Ironic T-shirts of all sizes, urban styles and every type of trendy footwear are in stock. 120 W. Main St., Los Gatos; 408.399.7071.

Karma Boutique Karma is all about edgy SoCal style—tattooed Ed Hardy prints and labels like Affliction, Raging Angles and Faith Connexion—with skulls, roses and ﬂeurs-de-lis abounding on apparel, and a leopard-print carpet running throughout the whole shop. Any clubber can put together no end of sultry outﬁts with this boutique’s variety of halter-tops

and itty-bitty minidresses. 155 N. Santa Cruz Ave., Los Gatos; 408. 354.8555.

Los Gatos Baby & Tot Boutique Jam-packed with everything pink and powder blue, Los Gatos Baby & Tot Boutique offers upscale items for the little ones. Special-occasion baby clothes, organic shoes, rattles, pillows, blankets—this place has every high-end baby product a shopper could want, but be prepared to drop some major cash. The store also has a ton of toys, from stuffed animals to educational mobiles. 49 N. Santa Cruz Ave., Los Gatos; 408.354.5454.

Manaz Stocking avant-garde, exclusive apparel from the runways of Paris, Japan and Milan, the clothes at Manaz Artistic Imagery are pieces of art unto themselves. In the minimalist vein of Diesel, the store has some of the most gorgeously crafted leatherwear around. Be prepared to pay for it, though: jackets start in the thousands and layering tees run $200 and up. 214 N. Santa Cruz Ave.; Los Gatos; 408.399.9983.

Salt Located just off the main Santa Cruz Avenue drag, Salt is a women’s boutique that sticks to the credo “pure and simple.” The store is impeccably laid out, airy with tasteful f loral details surrounding the obsessively organized clusters of hangers. The pieces stocked at Salt are classic, but with interesting twists and sexy edges, like unexpected open backs and chain details. 78 W. Main St., Los Gatos; 408.395.0800.

Time Out Clothing Company Time Out has the biggest, most extensive selection of swimwear of any boutique in the downtown Los Gatos area. From bikinis to one pieces to the comfortable, ever-forgiving tankini, this store has it all. They also feature stylish cover-ups, to keep women comfortable while sunning poolside. The rest of the store mainly focuses on casual active wear and basics. 108 N. Santa Cruz Ave., Los Gatos; 408.354.8653. M

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

APRIL 1-7, 2009

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APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 MENU

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[43]

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Personal Charms ;Za^eZ 7j^igV\d

Los Gatosâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Restaurant James Randall holds the hard times at bay with big, robust ďŹ&#x201A;avors By Stett Holbrook

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Restaurant James Randall 6YYgZhh/ (%( C# HVciV 8gjo 6kZ#! Adh <Vidh# E]dcZ/ )%-#(.*#)))&# =djgh/ AjcX] &&/(%VbĂ&#x201E;'eb IjZ";g^ VcY Y^ccZg */(%Ă&#x201E;&%eb IjZ"HVi# 8j^h^cZ/ 8Va^[dgc^V# Eg^XZ GVc\Z/ '&Ă&#x201E; ('# LZW/ gZhiVjgVci_VbZhgVcYVaa #Xdb#

HEN I FIRST visited Restaurant James Randall in Los Gatos, three years ago, it was just a few months old. The personal charms of the little restaurant won me over, even if some of the food was uneven. Two years later, thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s still the case. The business-swallowing recession has been tough on little restaurants, so I was pleased to see that James Randall seems to be holding its own. On both my visits, the restaurant attracted a decent midweek crowd. In fact, judging by the crowded dining rooms, a lot of the independently owned restaurants along North Santa Cruz Avenue seem to be doing well. At least in downtown Los Gatos, hard times appear to be in short supply. While service at James Randall is far less green than it was when I ďŹ rst visited, chef Ross Hansonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cooking has undergone few changes, and thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s both a strength and a weakness. Hanson, a Saratoga High School grad, runs the restaurant with his mother, Brenda Hammond. Mother and son had worked together in a catering business a few years back, but they really wanted their own restaurant. When Hammondâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s brother passed away about 12 years ago, he left her some

money, telling her to do something with it that she really wanted to do. So she and Hanson opened the restaurant and named it after him. Hansonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cooking generally takes its cues from the seasons and favors a simple, ingredient-driven approach that places it squarely in the California school of cooking. He favors big, robust ďŹ&#x201A;avors and large serving sizes to create a kind of California comfort food. Lunch is simple and straightforward, although I guess the dreamy parsley-and-trufflescented fries ($6) are a bit over the top. The Italian sub sandwich ($9) piles on the cold cuts, and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pretty good, but nothing better than youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d get at a run-of-the-mill deli. Better is the grilled-chicken GruyĂ¨re sandwich ($9.50), a luxurious pressed sandwich gilded with pickled onions, wild arugula and caper aioli. Both plates came with a freshly baked chocolate-chip cookie on the side, a homey touch the restaurant has kept around since the early days. The dinner menu illustrates the restaurantâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s strengths and weaknesses. When Hanson is hot, heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hot. But sometimes heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not. From the list of appetizers, the chorizo and clams ($12) was the hands-down favorite. Two handfuls of tiny sweet clams shared a bowl

with browned bits of spicy chorizo sausage in a rich, savory broth that was made to go with the greengarlic-topped toast. The grilled asparagus on top of creamy celery-root purĂŠe ($8) was a delicious blend of winter and spring ingredients, but the addition of lemon conďŹ t added a cloying note that detracted from the clean vegetal ďŹ&#x201A;avors of the other ingredients. The romaine hearts salad with cherry tomatoes and hearts of palm ($7) was crisp and fresh but otherwise an unremarkable bore. Duck breast can be a tricky ingredient to get right; it is easily rendered inedible and tough if not handled right. But the pan-roasted duck special ($31) on my visit suffered from the opposite problem: it was undercooked and blubbery, such that it was hard to distinguish the meat from the fatty skin. Far better were the ďŹ ve-spice braised beef short ribs ($24). The tangy, spiced crust of the meat yielded to an interior so tender and yielding I could have eaten it with a spoon. Almost as tender and equally ďŹ&#x201A;avorful was the roasted Eden Farms Berkshire pork chop, a fat slab of juicy pork goodness accented with maple-syrup-ďŹ&#x201A;avored pan juices our waiter aptly called â&#x20AC;&#x153;bacon on a stick.â&#x20AC;? And yet as hearty and good as the

short ribs and pork chop were, the ingredients and preparation donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t show much evolution in Hansonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cooking. Pork chops and short ribs are so 2006. Somehow the beltloosening, indulgent ingredients strike me as out of place in this recession-born era of restraint and retrenching. While the small wine list has a few good selections, some of the wine markups turned me off. I paid $12 for a bottle of the 2001 Silver Mountain Vineyards â&#x20AC;&#x153;Alloyâ&#x20AC;? at my local grocery store, but the restaurants sells the 2002 for $52. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s more than a 400 percent increase over retail. Can the â&#x20AC;&#x2122;02 be that much better? Desserts were good. At ďŹ rst, I balked at the small size of the chocolate torte ($9), but it more than made up for its size in ďŹ&#x201A;avor and density. The dessert had a texture of frozen molasses and a ďŹ&#x201A;avor of deep chocolate extravagance. The honey cheesecake ($8) was a satiny slice of creamy goodness. I still have a soft spot for James Randall, but after two years of business Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d like to see Hanson stretch a bit more and take the restaurant to the next level.

[44] DINING GUIDE

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 DINING GUIDE

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[45]

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Ask the Sommelier

HIS MONTH, we are debuting â&#x20AC;&#x153;Ask the Sommelier.â&#x20AC;? The ďŹ rst week of each month, the Wine Column will feature a Q and A with Silicon Valley sommeliers and wine experts. First up is Eric Entrikin of Alexanderâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Steakhouse in Cupertino. Thanks to Entrikin, Alexanderâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s wine list received Wine Spectator magazineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s award of excellence in 2008. In 2007, Entrikin passed the advanced test for the Court of Master Sommeliers and will be sitting for the master level test in July.

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METRO: Why did you pursue a career in wine?

ERIC ENTRIKIN: I kind of fell into it. I started working in the restaurant industry when I was 16, and at my ďŹ rst job at a fairly nice restaurant the owner said to me, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Why donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t you learn something about wine? No one here really knows much and you could be my expert.â&#x20AC;? I was about 19 at the time, so I read a few books about wine and became the wine expert, but I had to get around the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;how does it tasteâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; questions with a little imagination. After that, I really became much more interested in how something that could be grown in the poorest soils had so much diverse character. I started realizing how vast the wine world was and how much I wanted to learn about it. That fact has constantly kept me interested in the subject and fueled my desire to pursue and stay in the wine ďŹ eld. What makes the wine list at your restaurant special?

I really feel that our wine list is very personal. We hear it from guests, colleagues and other restaurant personnel. When I created the list I wanted to make it something that guests could learn and sometimes be entertained from while choosing their wine for the night. I included many stories about my experiences visiting winemakers and my viewpoints on what makes a wine special or unique. I frequently see the wine list on the table through to dessert. The typical comment when I ask if I can remove it is â&#x20AC;&#x153;Oh, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m still reading it.â&#x20AC;? I hope that through this and a well thought out selection of wines for the cuisine at Alexanderâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s that guests enjoy the list. What wine or wines are you passionate about right now?

I am most passionate about burgundy, nebbiolo from Piedmont and traditional rioja. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve had the opportunity to visit Burgundy several times and am just amazed at the diversity of nuance and ďŹ&#x201A;avor in the pinot noir and chardonnay grown there. Many of the vineyards that display these different characteristics are often separated by only a few feet. What are some of the best wine values now?

Value is a relative term. The other day I was offered a $12,000 discount on a case of wineâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;mind you, the price started out much higher, but now I guess I would look at it as a value. If we say value wines between $10 and $20 dollars in a retail outlet I would have to take a serious look at the country wines from France, Italy, Spain and Portugal. I could probably give you a list of some 500 wines Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve come across in the past year, but the best way I have always found to search out these gems is ask your sommelier, server or wine-store employee what they recommend, but give them some direction. What is your go-to wine for every day, casual drinking?

I usually try to drink as vast an array of wines so I can to discover new ďŹ nds, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hard to beat CĂ´tes du RhĂ´ne (red, white and dry rosĂŠ) from France for a great bottle that will go with just about anything. In the southern Rhone, they tend to be a little spicier, higher percentage of grenache, and in the north a little richer, usually more syrah. Stett Holbrook (sholbrook@metronews.com)

[46] DINING GUIDE

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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Mediterranean Mood

N CASE you havenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t already noticed, I offer you this veg*n tip: Go Mediterranean. While you may have visions of kebabs and gyros dancing before your eyes, much of what naturally accompanies such meaty Mediterranean meals is suitable for the vegan diet. I put the tip to the test this week and dined at Cafe Artemis, in the Pruneyard in Campbell. Noshing on their appetizer platter ($11.95) alone would have been a satisfying meal. Bonus points for not blinking an eye at our request to bring the appetizer that contained dairy (tzatziki) out on a separate plate. Double bonus points for separating out another appetizer that we didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t realize had dairy and adding it to the second plate without our asking. So what was left for me? Plenty. Falafel, hummus, tabouli, dolma lentil kofte and plenty of warm, soft ďŹ&#x201A;at bread. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a meal packed with protein and healthy grains right there: chickpeas, lentils, bulgur wheat. Naturally nutritious. Naturally low-fat. And lest you think the same could be said for plenty of taste-deďŹ cient â&#x20AC;&#x153;health food,â&#x20AC;? Mediterranean appetizers are liberal with the garlic and herbs, too. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re talking tasty, not just healthy. The portions of the appetizers served in this platter for two were also healthy. My dining companion and I did not make it all the way through the platter, and I had plenty of my entree to take home because I was already pretty well satisďŹ ed when it arrived. There are two identiďŹ ed vegetarian entrees on the menu: vegetable kebabs and Mediterranean okra over rice pilaf ($13.95). I chose the latter because, theoretically, I could string together the mushrooms, carrots, onions, peppers and eggplant found on the kebabs myself just about anytime, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s doubtful Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be cooking with okra anytime soon. That is because okra is a funny beast; it all relies on the cooking style and time, because, like a few other veggies I can name (Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m talking to you, eggplant!), if cooked too long or too short it can go from cute, ďŹ rm little alternative vegetable to slimy veggie from hell. Cafe Artemis gets it right, and along with a tangy tomato-based sauce and plump, nutty rice pilaf, the Mediterranean okra did this vegetable-thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;sreally-a-fruit proud. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s always good to have Mediterranean restaurants on your vegan radar, and Cafe Artemis is the perfect example of why: a bounty of fresh, healthy, ďŹ&#x201A;avorful options for vegetarians and vegans. Opa! Elisa Camahort (siliconveggie@workerbees.biz)

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

APRIL 1-7, 2009

[47]

Live Music With Francisco Ramirez Every Fri & Sat

$5 OFF Lunch or Dinner

When purchasing 2 or more entrees at the regular price. Not valid with any other offer. With this ad. One offer per table. Dine-in only. Exp. 4.15.09.

Make your party the talk of the town Let us cater your next event! 2280 El Camino Real, Santa Clara (408) 247-0990

[48]

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 DINING GUIDE

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[49]

[50] DINING GUIDE

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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E]d & CddYaZ =djhZ 6h^Vc

Authentic, Italian-American restaurant featuring chefprepared dishes and premium wines. Lavish portions of authentic Southern Italian cuisine are served family-style. Great selection of homemade pastas, signature salads, prime steaks, fresh ďŹ sh and memorable desserts. The made-from-scratch menu is brimming with traditional dishes. Maggianoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is ideal for group lunches, festive gatherings and romantic dinners for two. Maggianoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s also has beautiful private banquet rooms with capacity for up to 170 guests, perfect for wedding receptions, holiday parties and corporate seminars and meetings. 3055 Olin Ave., Suite 1000, San Jose 408.423.8973

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Bruce Bruce Springsteen S pringsteen HP P Pavilion avilion 525 W. W. San San Carlos Carlos St, St, San San n Jose Jose 408.998. .T TIXS 408.998.TIXS W ed e d – 8pm; 8 $6 5 and d up Wed $65

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Ballet B allet San San Jose Jose Center ffor Center or the Performing Performing Arts Arts,, 255 Almaden Blvd, Blvd, d San San Jose Jose 408.288.2800 Thu-S at – 8pm, Sun S – 1:30pm; $25Thu-Sat $8 5 $85

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South F South First irst Friday F riday

Shakespeare’s S hakespeare’s Most M ost Wanted Wanted

South First South First Street, Street, San San Jose Jose 408.27 1.5 5155 408.271.5155 F ri e vening g till late; free free Fri evening

Th Theatre heatre on S San an P Pedro edro Squar Square e 29 9 N. N. San San Pedro Pedro St, St, San San Jose Jose ww ww.shady ys shakes.org www.shadyshakes.org F rii-S i Satt – 8pm, 8 S Sun – 2 and d 7pm; 7 $25 Fri-Sat

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Spring S pring Zydeco Zydeco Landmark Ballroom Landmark Ballroom 75 S. S. 11th St, St, San San Jose Jose 408.286 .1313 408.286.1313 S at – 7 ::30pm; $15/$20 $15/$20 Sat 7:30pm;

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No Fear Energy Music San Jose Event Center SJSU Campus 408.998.TIXS Sat â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 7pm; $35

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Chinese Art

Phenomenauts

Fall Out Boy

Museum of Quilts & Textiles 520 S. First St, San Jose 408.971.0323 Sun â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 2pm; $10/$15

Nickel City Arcade 1711 Branham Ln, San Jose 408.448.3323 Sun â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 7pm; $10

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Fall Out Boy with Metro Station, Cobra Starship, All Time Low, and Hey Monday San Jose State University 408.998.TIXS Tue â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 7pm; $36

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[54]

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 ARTS

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METROGUIDE

Gjmn A summer job turns into an ‘Adventureland’_59

It’s a Scrawl World Ivan Brunetti’s new anthology of comics and graphic ﬁction is a wide-ranging stroll through risky territory By Richard von Busack

BLAST OFF B!ofx!dpnjdt! dpmmfdujpo!! {ppnt!pgg!joup!! vodibsufe!ufssjupsz/!

HAT EDITOR and cartoonist Ivan Brunetti has done: he has presided over a collection that does for anticommercial comics what the Oxford Anthology of English Verse does for poetry. What Brunetti was trying to do: something far more modest, apparently. The 86 artists gathered in An Anthology of Graphic Fiction, Cartoons and True Stories, Vol. 2 merely “share the same cultural broth,” Brunetti writes. He adds, “Cartoonist are, at heart, doodlers,” and that’s Brunetti’s way of dismissing even his own surpassingly morbid and crazed autobiographical cartoons. It’s nice to hear an academic understating a case for pop culture, but I’m ﬂabbergasted by the range of work in this collection. The selections are kaleidoscopically varied, almost universally risky and created to satisfy a number of impulses. Here are street-level scrawlers begging to be remembered, such as Oakland’s Eugene Teal (honored in Karl Wills’ animated short Teach Me), and the still missing-in-action Elinore Norﬂus, whose work for R. Crumb’s

Weirdo remains some of the most disturbing outsider art ever printed. Also here, though from a different decade, is Fletcher Hanks, a genius who literally froze to death on a park bench. Chester Gould’s Dick Tracy is admired and taken apart by Art Spiegelman, the collage artist Jess, Harvey Kurtzman and Michael Kupperman. Gilberto Hernandez’s Drink, Fucker! isn’t directly about that iconic ﬁgure that Nabokov called “Jutjaw the Detective,” yet Hernandez is the only one who really understands the Zen of Gould’s bizarre ﬁgures: many of his characters are inked with the vicious, pensnapping brutality of Gould’s harsh black lines. These supposed doodlers range far out in time. From 1942, we get two pages of Bill Holman’s batshit-crazy Smokey Stover; that comic’s appearance in the Sunday Los Angeles Times was as essential a guide to liberation from the mind-forged manacles of the Southland as were Alfred E. Neuman and Dr. Demento. Sixty years later, Tim Hensley takes the fuggly 1950s panel cartoon, empties it and crawls into it like a

hermit crab, to emit S.J. Perelman– worthy scorn. Noting the way bankers and smooth jazz go together like hookworms and pellagra, Hensley has an effete character at a swank restaurant drawling, “When I first heard Eco-Byzantium by Zanzibar Taupe, it was like floating an insolvent surety bond into fiduciary defeasance.” Doodlers? Well, there’s nothing doodly about the editing here, about putting Joe Matt’s sleazy sexual adventures flush against Jeffrey Brown’s own tenderly awkward story of losing his virginity. There’s more than mere propinquity in having Lynda Barry, Jessica Abel and Diane Noomin rubbing shoulders. Chris Ware’s stunning miniaturized tales are juxtaposed with Adrian Tomine’s and Daniel Clowes’ own slaved-over graphics. Harvey Pekar’s account of bottoming out as a record-collecting junkie sits pages away from R. Crumb’s That’s Life! The latter is a particularly memorable Crumb—his best work ever?—all about a pair of concentric circles. One is the short, harsh life of an unknown Southern blues musician; the larger one is of present-day blues aficionados

gathering to listen to a worn 78. John Porcellino’s memoir of his family’s dog is as charming and as effectively sad as Marley & Me and much more spare. David Heatley’s portrait of his loving and slightly eccentric parents is far more than a “parents say the darnedest things” story—Heatley notes the way his parents cling, and the way he has to gently hold them at arm’s length. Jim Woodring’s elaborate dream sequences have the artist, in pajamas and lumbering like Karloff, wandering through ever more disturbing scenarios. Kevin Huizenga’s The Curse, about the heinousness of that exotic pest, the starling, is as handsome as Hergé’s Tintin and as informative as an hour of PBS. Here is all the vigorousness of a new art form, not at all pruned to that shape that marketing departments call “a generation.” Rather than deﬁning a time, this collection will defy it. AN ANTHOLOGY OF GRAPHIC FICTION, CARTOONS & TRUE STORIES, VOL. 2, edited by Ivan Brunetti; Yale University Press; 400 pages; $28 hardback.

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STAGE REVIEW @Zk^c 7ZgcZ

@Vedl^X] 6gi <VaaZgn

[57]

On High San Jose Rep brings Khaled Hosseini’s ‘Kite Runner’ to the stage CHILDHOOD BOND Ibttbo!)mfgu-!! HE ANCIENT Mpxfmm!Bcfmmpo*!boe!Bnjs!)Dsbjh!Qjbhfu*!! bsf!cftu!gsjfoet!jo!qsfxbs!Lbcvm/ Afghan sport of kite flying bookends the heart-wrenching narrative of The Kite Runner, uplifting the stage version of the bestselling novel about friendship, love, lose, guilt, atonement and redemption. In its world-premiere theatrical adaptation at San Jose Repertory Theater, The Kite Runner is an outstanding production with exceptionally realistic descriptions of emotions, if not situations. Based on the story by San Jose’s Khaled Hosseini, The Kite Runner offers insights into Afghan culture, the inescapably shocking sadness of the war-torn country’s political history and its long-term implications on the human psyche. Adapted for the stage by SJSU professor Matthew Spangler, the play is a tale told in two parts, the first one being the stronger. The action takes place in peaceful 1970s Kabul, where 12-year-old Amir (Craig Piaget) and his best friend, Hassan (Lowell Abellon), bask in the simplicity of childhood. Although Amir is a rich Pashtun boy and Hassan is his lowly Hazara servant, the two boys have an inseparable bond, spending their summer afternoons flying kites, climbing trees and reading. Amir, the son of a local businessman, Baba (Thomas Fiscella), yearns for his father’s love and approval and secretly despises him for showering Hassan with affection. Abellon and Piaget are superb in their roles as the two young friends. Piaget conveys Amir’s giddy innocence, fidgeting with excitement at the kite flying tournament and horsing around with abandon. Abellon’s plucky Hassan is more serious and mature in his expressions, a boy more down to earth than flighty Amir. Their story is narrated by the adult Amir (Barzin Akhavan), who stands onstage clarifying in the past tense what is going on inside the head of young Amir as tragic events unfold and his cowardice changes the course of everybody’s lives forever. Scenic designer Vicki Smith uses a simple set with strong yellows and tans to situate the play in the sun-drenched barren lands of prewar Afghanistan, while the rhythmic percussion of the tabla (an Indian drum), played live onstage by Salar Nader, helps propel the action. Like all stage adaptations of acclaimed books, there is a huge amount of backstory and context to shoehorn into a comparatively brief time span. So much narrative is squashed to fit into a modest running time that a certain amount of depth of the boys’ friendship is lost. The play’s nearly three-hour run time becomes tiresome in the final stretch, the exact time when the audience should be riveted by Amir’s final act of redemption. The production (directed by David Ira Goldstein) would benefit from cutting a half-hour of extraneous subplotlines. The play, like the book, is also marred by a ridiculous, overblown ending that sends the second half of the story line totally off a cliff. The final confrontation comes off cartoonish when it should be horrifying, somehow turning the most terrorizing of regimes, the Taliban, into extravagant movie bad guys. Staying true to traditional plot formula, Amir gets a second chance at the end of The Kite Runner. We can only pray that the fate of Afghanistan turns out likewise.

Jessica Fromm THE KITE RUNNER plays Tuesday at 7:30pm, Wednesday at 11am (April 1 only) and 8pm, Thursday–Friday at 8pm, Saturday at 3 and 8pm and Sunday at 2pm through April 19 at the Rep, 101 Paseo de San Antonio, San Jose. Tickets are $27–$48. (408.367.7255)

BUS BARN STAGE COMPANY

BREAKING THE CODE by Hugh Whitemore directed by Barbara J. Cannon The play based on the book "Alan Turing: The Enigma" by Andrew Hodges

April 9 – May 2, 2009 Tix/ (650) Info:

941-0551 www.busbarn.org 97 Hillview, Los Altos

[58] STAGE/ART/LIT

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 FILM

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Bananas

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Adventurelandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; returns us to the summer of 1987, in the limbo between high school and college

By Richard von Busack

HE intelligence and the malaise level in Adventureland are fairly high considering that the ďŹ lm is, deep in its bones, a barf, boner and bong teen comedy. The action is set in the summer of 1987 and will, in the popular mind, stamp out real memories of that year, just as American Graffiti overwrote the real 1950s. Adventureland doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t capture much of the essence of its time; it features, for instance, collegebound students who donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t snarl about Reagan. Still, if it werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t that Apatowland and its suburbs were all about the frat-boy worldview, you could say that director Greg Mottola really took this perennial teen material to college. Mottola, of Superbad and The Daytrippers, is seasoned enough to realize that Holden CaulďŹ eld was sort of a snob. James, the CaullďŹ eldish privileged student going to Columbia, is played by Jesse Eisenberg. Expecting the European tour after graduating high school, James gets an unhappy surprise. His fatherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s money has run out, and James will have to land a job somewhere to pay for college. (If Adventureland is a success, part of it will be due to the timeliness of that kind of story.) Right at the bottom of Jamesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;

employees-wanted list is the amusement park Adventureland (actually Kennywood in West Mifflin, Pa.); when he gives up and applies, James is hired to work the carnival games. He is saved from trouble right off by Em (Kristen Stewart), a sharp but quiet girl who is heading to NYU. During the summer, James deals with the local bullies and dopes, as well as a gross clown called Frigo (Matt Bush) who delights in sucker-punching James in the cubes. James ďŹ nds better company with Martin Starrâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Joel, a poverty-stricken intellectual, whose delusions of being Sartre lead him to walk around smoking a pipe. Bill Hader and Kristen Wiig play the couple running the amusement park. These two robust comic actors hold together the ďŹ lmâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s episodes as well as Bill Murray held together Caddyshack. Their No. 1 problem seems to be the stuffed-toy supply. They fret over the plush bananas and â&#x20AC;&#x153;giant-ass pandasâ&#x20AC;? like stockbrokers watching the Big Board. As James becomes increasingly fond of Em, he fails to realize what we know: that sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s carrying on with Mike (Ryan Reynolds), a handyman at the park, who is married.

In a sense, Eisenberg reprises his acting in The Squid and the Whale; his James has the same mix of sensitivity and clumsy, unexpected self-centeredness. Mottola includes a rather ďŹ ne specimen of the adolescent brain-fart: James tells Em that he wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t in love the one time he got a chance to lose his virginityâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;James knew it wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t love, because it wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t what he had felt when he was reading Shakespeareâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Sonnet no. 57. No matter how James really felt about the experience, this counts as a line heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s feeding a girl. And Adventureland has enough dimensionâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and dimension isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t what you customarily get in Apatowlandâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;to make us realize it is a line, no matter how much honesty is in it. You canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t blame James for exaggerating his feelings a little. Stewart broke out of the pack as the guitar-playing girl at the desert crash pad who almost seduces Emile Hirsch in Into the Wild. If Twilight is giving Stewart a worldwide audience, Adventureland proves why she is going places. She has the poise, the serenity and the slightly offsync quality of the real star. I also liked Mottolaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s refusal to make Mike a skulking predator; playing a more shadowy character than usual, Reynolds gives his

best performance ever. The ďŹ lm does stuck-inthe-summer scenes well; the Adventureland employees have two after-hours choices: One is a roadhouse with the Rolling Stones tribute band â&#x20AC;&#x153;Tumbling Dicâ&#x20AC;? (as the marquee puts it) as regulars. The other option is Twofer Tuesdays at the disco Razzmatazz. Two wordless sequences stand out. One is a summary stoned drive around Pittsburgh, with the girders and rivets of a trestle bridge seen from the angle of a viewer lying back, wasted, on the passenger seat, as the Velvet Undergroundâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;Pale Blue Eyesâ&#x20AC;? plays on the cassette deck. The other is a scene of the buildings of midtown New York in torrential rain, viewed through a bus window and set to the Replacementsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; â&#x20AC;&#x153;UnsatisďŹ ed.â&#x20AC;? Superbadâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s amusing silliness gives way here to the perfect compromise: an apparently happy ending that is actually, if you think about it, an open ending.

ADVENTURELAND (R; 107 min.), directed and written by Greg Mottola, photographed by Terry Stacey and starring James Brennan and Kristen Stewart, opens April 3.

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[60]

FILM APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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Problem Solving Animated â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Monsters vs. Aliensâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; overcomes technical hurdles but lacks passion

O A CHILD this century, Mars Attacks! is an old and quaint movie, thus making some of the ďŹ lms sourced by that 1996 Tim Burton comedy as creaky and ancient as MĂŠliĂ¨s. The animated Monsters vs. Aliens owes as much to Mars Attacks! as Mars Attacks! owes to Earth vs. the Flying Saucers. The new feature-length animated ďŹ lm Monsters vs. Aliens raids this unkillable era of 1950s science ďŹ ction, yet it tiptoes around some of the social questions that used to be debated in those Ike-era watch-the-skies tales. Susan (voiced by Reese Witherspoon) is a modern Modesto girl of not a lot of characterâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s waiting to be married, and that deďŹ nes her right there. Right before the ceremony sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hit by a meteorite and spontaneously mutates into a 50-foot woman. Drugged and taken away by the Army, she is locked up in a massive steel dungeon with several other monsters: a gelatinous blob called B.O.B. (Seth Rogan); a Creature From the Black Lagoonâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;style amphibian the Missing Link (Will Arnett); the genetically spliced mutant Dr. Cockroach Ph.D. (Hugh Laurie); and a towering Toho-style bug monster. At ďŹ rst, Susan just wants to get back to her life. Then, when Earth is threatened by an alien conqueror called Gallaxhar (Rainn Wilson), Susan reluctantly accepts her countryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s call to battle the intruder, under her code name Ginormica. The monsters have their little routines, but they never seem to evince real personalitiesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re too busy being cute. The talkative B.O.B. is basically the same character as Dory in Finding Nemo, and the same shade of blue, too. This story works in some emotional conďŹ&#x201A;ict, but as directed by Rob Letterman and Conrad Vernon, it plays about as deep as a Hanna-Barbera backdrop. The political side of the ďŹ lm is uneasy. Kiefer Sutherland plays Gen. W.R. Monger (that name ainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t exactly Roald Dahl); Stephen Colbert shows up as a â&#x20AC;&#x2122;50s president who can be counted on to make the wrong response. Surely, Colbert should have been doing what he does best: playing a pundit, advising and warning, suavely misinterpreting the situation. The steel dungeon could be a reference to Guantanamo, which, under these circumstances, is like the bite of a dog with rubber teeth. Susanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Keanepainting eyes are enormous even before she becomes a giantess, which gives the ďŹ lmâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s situation of kidnapping a mood that it canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t deal with. Things donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t really get going until Susan and the team board the evil Gallaxharâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Art Nouveau space ship. Gallaxhar has four separate eyes, mostly unsychronized, and a squid body; he has reďŹ ned aesthetics, like a good villain. A giant-robot battle at the Golden Gate Bridge has size but no scopeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all tangled-up, close-contact wrestling. When Ginormica/Susan skates through the hills of San Francisco with cars for shoes, we do enjoy a true showpiece for the 3-D. Monsters vs. Aliens is a real technical feat and obviously was damned hard to do, but the ďŹ lm is hampered by the sense of restraint. It doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t go for the guts (as Disney would have done), for fear of making it too scary for children or too heartfelt for ironic young adults. The Pixar approach would have been to ďŹ nd the passion in the story. Monsters vs. Aliens seems like a producerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s passion: a series of story and artistic problems that had to be solved by a team. Richard von Busack MONSTERS VS. ALIENS (PG; 94 min.), directed by Rob Letterman and Conrad Vernon and with the voices of Reese Witherspoon and Hugh Laurie, plays valleywide.

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FILM REVIEW

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Reviews by Michael S. Gant and Richard von Busack.

New Adventureland (R; 107 min.) See review on page 59. Alien Trespass (PG; 113 min.) A silver-clad space alien ďŹ&#x201A;ies into a small California town in 1957; hijacking the body of a local scientist (Eric McCormack), the alien tries to track an all-devouring invisible monster called â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Ghotaâ&#x20AC;? before it can replicate and destroy the world. We know why it was released (to hang onto the coattails of Monsters vs. Aliens), but why was it made? Revisiting the bugeyed-monster movies of the 1950s is kind of like spooďŹ ng D.W. GrifďŹ th at this point, and R.W. Goodwinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s labor of love doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t bring a lot new to the table aside from the terriďŹ c art direction. As the waitress who longs to go to Sausalito, the noteworthy Jenni Baird has the period diction and the 1950s look exactly right, though the movieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s more overt sexual innuendo would have been better off smothered, in the name of making this look like its 1950s model. Harmless, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a hobbyistâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s movie. (Opens Apr 3 at the Aquarius in Palo Alto.) (RvB) Fast & Furious (PG; 107 min.) Their careers in ruins, Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Jordana Brewster and Michelle Rodriguez return to the franchise that launched them. The ampersand makes all the difference, apparently. (Opens Apr 3.) The Haunting in Connecticut (PG-13; 92 min.) The Southington, Conn., Funeral Home case investigated by the team of Ed and Lorraine Warren is the â&#x20AC;&#x153;true

storyâ&#x20AC;? part of this ďŹ lm; this (no surprise) highly ďŹ ctionalized PG-13 version takes out all of the demonic sex and takes up one kind of interesting angle. Since cancer wards are scarier than haunted houses, the ďŹ lm trafďŹ cs in some of the authentic horrors of a disease usually used in the movies for its life-afďŹ rming qualities. Young Matt (Kyle Gallner) is slightly demented from a new cancer drug, and this is the possible reasonable explanation for his seeing dead people at the scary old house in â&#x20AC;&#x153;Goatswood, Conn.â&#x20AC;? But then things get awfully familiar: Martin Donovan as the alcoholic father doing Mr. Torrance from The Shining, Elias Koteas as Fr. Merrin from The Exorcist and the licensed-to-startle house bringing out so much of the CGI youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve seen before (the one new development being ectoplasm, or ghost barf). Too many characters, not enough development. Virginia Madsen takes it very seriously as the mom, but sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no help. The power of prayer saves the dayâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t the movie be scarier if it didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t? (Plays valleywide.) (RvB) Hunger (Unrated; 96 min.) An agnosticâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s account of a martyrdom: the clinical details of the suffering recorded faithfully, the ulcers probed. The ďŹ lm recognizes the faith for its terrible power, but he doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t share it. Director Steve McQueen is a visual artist and not one to shy away from the rotting-meat side of humanity. McQueen decided to aestheticize the suffering of IRA warrior Bobby Sands (Michael Fassbender), who willfully starved himself to death in prison in 1981. McQueenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s approach is really no different than a medieval artist trying to get the right way St. Lawrence looked on his red-hot grill. Hunger is a brutal and nauseating ďŹ lm, though perhaps Saw fans can handle it; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just about justiďŹ able because itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s so dispassionate. McQueen spares some sympathy for the other side, for a baby-faced rookie disgusted by the British brutality against the prisoners. Hungerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s centerpiece is a 22-minute long take, a sharply paced ping-

pong of dialogue between a wise priest (Liam Cunningham) and the intransigent Sands. Surprisingly, the representative of the Church takes the civilized view of this sacriďŹ ce: in short, that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s madness. Sands clinches his side of the argument with a childhood memory that sounds awfully like something cribbed from Equus. This sceneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been called a brilliant piece of cinema; I think itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a fairly good piece of theater. (Opens Apr 3 at Camera 3 in San Jose.) (RvB) Monsters vs. Aliens (PG; 94 min.) See review at left. (Plays valleywide.)

Revivals The Big Trail (1930) The 23-year-old John Wayne plays Breck Coleman, who takes on the job of scout on the Oregon Trail for two reasons. The ďŹ rst is to settle a score with a murderer named Red Flack, played as a combo of Falstaff and Bluto by Tyrone Power Sr. His other motive is to personally escort a lady he loves through the dangers ahead. Breck leads an armada of prairie schooners through river crossings, violent storms and Indian attack sequences. The early sound recording creaks, as does the Swedish dialect comedy of El Brendel. And yet Raoul Walshâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s spectacle rivals and often surpasses the masters of the Western like John Ford and Sergio Leone. Walshâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s wide screen is shockingly deep and vast; every landscape looks 500 miles wide. The Stanfordâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s print is an anamorphic 35 mm version of the 70 mm â&#x20AC;&#x153;Grandeurâ&#x20AC;? original, a predecessor of CinemaScope. Highly recommended. (Plays Apr 1 in Palo Alto at the Stanford Theatre.) (RvB) Blackmail (1929) A lecherous artist (Cyril Ritchard, later famous for his Capt. Hook on television) is stabbed by his model, whose real boyfriend is the police detective later assigned to solve the murder. The ďŹ lm is noteworthy for director Alfred Hitchcockâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s use of â&#x20AC;&#x153;the SchĂźfftan processâ&#x20AC;?: German cinematographer Eugene SchĂźfftanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s method to blend mirror images with actual backdrops. (What a rĂŠsumĂŠ SchĂźfftan had: Marcel Carneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Quai des Brumes, the smart RenĂŠ Clair fantasy It Happened Tomorrow, Franjuâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Eyes Without a Face, The Hustler). Hitchcock used the famous process to re-create several rooms in the British Museum for the ďŹ nale. BILLED WITH Maggieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s First False Step (a.k.a. Oily Schemer) (1917) and The Caretakerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Daughter (1925) with Charley Chase. Judy Rosenberg at the piano. (Plays Apr 4 at 7:30 in Fremont at the Edison Theater, 37417 Niles Blvd.) (RvB) Cover Girl/Separate Tables (1944/1958) Betrayed by Rita Hayworth: Gene Kelly, as a discarded Brooklyn nightclub dancer, waits for the lady to come to her senses. Songs by Jerome Kern and Ira Gershwin include â&#x20AC;&#x153;Long Ago and Far Away.â&#x20AC;? BILLED WITH Separate Tables. In a British seaside resort during the winter, several tenants look for love; this Grand Hotel of a more downbeat era includes Hayworth, Burt Lancaster and Deborah Kerr, with David Niven as a dubious major. (Plays Apr 2-3 in Palo Alto at the Stanford Theatre.) (RvB) Laurel and Hardy An afternoon with Laurel and Hardy in Pardon Us (1931). â&#x20AC;&#x153;In this effusion, Messrs. Laurel and Hardy spend most of their time either in prison, to which they are sent for attempting to brew beer, or on a cotton plantation disguised as Negroesâ&#x20AC;?â&#x20AC;&#x201D;undoubted monoclewearer Mordaunt Hall, thenâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;ďŹ lm critic for The New York Times. Also: The Hoose-Gow (1929), in which the two are behind bars, again. Free Eats (1932) with Our Gang; in which the urchins foil burglars using midgets disguised as children. (Plays Apr 5 at 4pm in Fremont at the Edison Theater, 37417 Niles Blvd.) (RvB) This Dust of Words (2008) Palo Altoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bill Roseâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s documentary follows the life and mysterious death of Elizabeth Wiltsee, a brilliant student who succumbed to madness. (Plays Apr 5 at 7pm in Palo Alto at Stanford Universityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Robie Hall Theater; free.) (RvB)

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 FILM Why Ye Fight (1772) Recently restored propaganda film includes rare footage of Benjamin Franklin exhorting the home front during the Revolutionary War to “kill one more Hessian” by buying Continental Army Bonds. Of course it’s fascinating to see the great man— he has a higher, reedier voice than you’d expect—but the picture is stolen by saucy French soubrette Avril Poisonn; her pin-up woodcuts helped give our troops the resolve to win against the British. Also playing: ye olde newsreels of the action at Yorktown. (Plays April 1 at the Snadfort Theatre in Palo Alto.) (BvR) Witness for the Prosecution/Shanghai Express (1957/1932) Two with the timeless Dietrich. In Billy Wilder’s courtroom drama, a sleek Yankee swine in London (Tyrone Power) stands accused of murdering a wealthy old lady. His betrayed wife (Marlene Dietrich) may not be in the mood to provide an alibi. Charles Laughton presides over the court, while costars Henry Daniell, John Williams and Una O’Connor help find justice. BILLED WITH Shanghai Express. Marlene Dietrich stars as “Shanghai Lily,” the Orient’s most notorious concubine, fleeing the war-lord-ridden China of the early 1930s. Aboard a train with a fellow lady of the night (Anna May Wong), Dietrich encounters Mongol bandit Warner Oland (the Swedish actor who played Charlie Chan). Seeing her, Oland utters the line summing up screen Asians in the classic period of Hollywood: “The white woman stays with me!” (Still, better a marauder than a houseboy.) Berserk in its conception yet florid and beautiful in its carrying-out— cinematographer Lee Garmes is at his best here. Director Josef von Sternberg, patently in love with his star, gazes on her fondly. Some share the fondness; others just come along for the sometimes preposterous movieness of it all. (Plays Apr 4-6 in Palo Alto at the Stanford Theatre.) (RvB)

DVDs The Robe The ﬁrst CinemaScope features gets a makeover on DVD; read about it at www.metroactive.com.

Reviews The Class (PG-13; 128 min.) In taking the pressurecooker atmosphere of a high-school classroom and making it absolutely compelling, Laurent Cantet’s film shows the excitement of doing a desperately important job. The school in Paris we see here isn’t oldschool in any sense of the word. Students of every nationality in the old French sphere of influence attend. François Bégaudeau plays what he is in real life: a correct, graceful, unflappable teacher who can handle what his always-chafing kids throw at him. (RvB) The Cross (PG) The story of a man who has been around the world carrying a heavy (literal) cross on his back. Duplicity (PG-13; 125 min.) Curdled swank. It tries to recall the 1960s slice-of-cake style with split-screen, harpsichord music, treacherous lovers and exotic locations. Director/writer Tony Gilroy adds some modern convoluted storytelling. MI6 agent Ray (Owen) thinks that he has landed a smooth pickup, but he’s knocked cold for 16 hours: Claire (Julia Roberts) has slipped him a champagne Mickey. In 2008, Ray and Claire—still feuding—now are working together for a cosmetics company, safeguarding the interests of a savage underdog named Garsik (Paul Giamatti), who is nipping at the heels of a rival corporation, chaired by Tully (Tom Wilkinson). Roberts is probably trying to do Eva Marie Saint’s Eve Kendall in North by Northwest, with less WASP politeness. But something, perhaps plastic surgery or Botox, has given her an ominous mask. Owen’s undoubted masculinity is undimmed, but he

gets peevish when he’s dealing with Claire’s chilly trickery. (RvB) Everlasting Moments (Unrated; 131 min.) Maria Heiskanen plays a working-class Finnish mother living in Sweden in the first 20 years of the last century. She settles down with the brutish Sigfrid, called Siggi (Mikael Persbrandt), but is touched by the attentions of Pedersen (Jesper Christensen), who owns a camera store. Director Jan Troell has a great gift with this period, as he showed in The Emigrants (1971) and The New Land (1972). It took skill not to make this story a temperance melodrama. (RvB) Gomorrah (Unrated; 137 min.) One of the least romanticized movies about organized crime ever made. Director Matteo Garrone is, in a sense, going up against his entire country. The film weaves a quintet of stories out of this battlefront. Young Toto, a delivery boy, gets a job with the local drug gangs. The unsavory waste-removal magnate Franco (Toni Servillo) is clandestinely burying toxic waste in a marble quarry. Two young antic idiots, addled by visions of Pacino in Scarface, take up some stolen guns and go on a minor crime spree. The middle-aged Don Ciro (Gianfelice Imparto) is a clerk for the local mob. Director Garrone is outraged, but it hasn’t made him inarticulate. He presumes the viewer is not a thug, and not in the mood to watch torture. When it comes, the violence comes out of nowhere; it’s scary, and it hurts. (RvB) Gran Torino (R; 116 min.) Korean War vet and auto-plant worker Walt Kowalski (Clint Eastwood) has just been widowed. Kowalski is coping with the new faces in the neighborhood. Even though they’re “good” Asians (Hmong who fought on the U.S. side in Vietnam), Kowalski will have nothing to do with them. When a fatherless kid, Thao (Bee Vang), from next door is pressured into stealing Kowalski’s cherished muscle car, Kowalski puts the boy to work. This good solid labor attracts the fury of a local gang of Lao thugs. Of course, the tottering Kowalski knows how to handle loads like these, in the way Eastwood has been handling them before most of us were born. The actor is comic here. He’s aware of the humor of gramps with a gun, grrring as he surveys the next generation or sopping up a cooler full of Pabst Blue Ribbon. We can buy the tale, even if Kowalksi is about as authentic an embodiment of working-class America as Joe the Plumber. (RvB) The Great Buck Howard (PG; 87 min) Basically just a lot of incidents, but they sound authentic. Sean McGinley’s minor but appealing comedy has a strong spine in the form of John Malkovich, here with oily toupee, well-worn tux, cappedlooking teeth and indeterminate sexuality. The grand Malkovich is Buck Howard, a temperamental mentalist who plays—as he puts it—”400 shows a year.” Colin Hanks plays a law school dropout with some vague notions of being a writer; he is scooped up to be part of the entourage of the Great Buck Howard. Tom Hanks himself comes in for a few scenes to play Troy’s disapproving dad. Real-life talk show hosts from Jon to Martha Stewart endure Howard’s trademark glad-hand handshake. Among the cast, I was sorriest to lose Santa Cruz’s own Adam Scott, who drops out early. Scott, who plays a seething assistant, really brings a ton of wrath into his comedy. (RvB) I Love You, Man (R) Not that there’s anything wrong with that, as they put it in the famous homosexual-panic episode of Seinfeld. The sure-to-be hilarious premise finds Paul going on “man dates” in order to choose a best man for his wedding. Knowing (PG-13; 120 min.) Once one of the most interesting actors in the American cinema, Nicolas Cage is now the Peter Lorre of CGI: forced, wide-eyed and ranting, to realize the shocking truth and to shrink in terror before it. In Alex Proyas’ strangely evangelical film, Cage’s John Koestler, widower and

MIT professor, overparents his pale son, Caleb (Chandler Canterbury), and analyzes a shocking set of calculations. In a remote trailer in the woods, John and the girl in the picture, Diana (Rose Byrne), learn the secret of the numbers—and the fateful doom they contain. Ten fairly good minutes of CGI; 110 of sobbing, grim family drama. (RvB) The Last House on the Left (R; 100 min.) Based on Bergman’s Virgin Spring, the original Last House on the Left questions whether, when forced into the most extreme circumstances, there is really much difference between the most wretched criminals and the most civilized suburbanites. The remake is not about the same things. But this is not a shock film, it’s not an exploitation flick, it’s not even really a horror film. It’s just a very 21st-century thriller. The plot is basically the same: Krug (Garret Dillahunt) and his criminal family kidnap Mari (Sara Paxton) and Paige (Martha MacIsaac); rape, stab and shoot them; then by coincidence end up at the home of Mari’s parents. It’s not hard to imagine the shenanigans that ensue. But this time, everything seems oddly logical. Everyone has a reason for doing what they’re doing, even if it’s an evil one: the criminals seem like they might let Mari and Paige go, but then Mari tries to escape. The parents don’t start taking out the perps for revenge purposes, they do it because they’re trying to save someone’s life. It’s all sort of civilized, really, and even though the attack scenes against the girls are vicious, they’re not even remotely on the level of the original. (SP) Race to Witch Mountain (PG; 99 min.) Kids today are no doubt thinking “What is Witch Mountain, and why would anyone race to a mountain that appears to be infested with practitioners of the dark arts?” Geez, kids, relax already! You see, back in the day, when we were kids, we had a movie called Escape to Witch Mountain. It was about these two orphans with spooky powers who have to get away from an evil guy who wants to exploit them. UFOs were also involved. For some reason, this seemed like the greatest thing ever to us. There were all these sequels and remakes—somebody always seemed to either be escaping to Witch Mountain or from Witch Mountain or something. Now here’s another remake, with new orphans and tThe Rock as the guy trying to save them. What this has to do with a race I haven’t figured out. (SP) The Reader (R; 123 min.) The Reader is a combination of guilt-by-association grandstanding and lost-love maundering: I mean the kind of first love that keeps a person from ever functioning properly for the rest of his life, the kind of first love even devoted moviegoers don’t really believe in anymore. The story has a point: some 60,000 people worked at Auschwitz, and only a handful ever served jail time for it. The legacy of guilt would take some unusual, unsuspected forms. The film sets up the moral dilemma, as emphasized by screenwriter David Hare—what if you loved a Nazi? There’s an essential cruelty to Bernhard Schlink’s popular novel that disguises itself— as cruelty often will—as sensitivity. The Reader insists that the Nazis were human beings and that reading might have reformed them. We’re aware of the former. But reading in the abstract means little. In fact the Nazis were great, swooning readers, and Goebbels was a novelist. (RvB) Sunshine Cleaning (R; 102 min.) In Albuquerque, two sisters get into the lucrative field of cleaning up after dead bodies. Christine Jeff’s mostly pleasant comedy of death and bloodshed is lit up like a pink lamp shade by the ever-lovable Amy Adams and given some dark highlights by Emily Blunt as her grimier sibling. The film seems trampled over by a producer’s cold feet, but what’s left has charm and hard-nosed humor. With Alan Arkin as the feckless father of the sisters—looking fit as usual, Arkin; he’ll probably get a shovel and bury us all some day. (RvB)

Taken (PG-13; 93 min.) Ignorant and extremely repetitive thriller about a ring of Albanian white-slavers, heisting “guaranteed pure” young flesh for Jabba the Arab. A squandered Liam Neeson plays the avenging American dad on the trail of his daughter. Of universal appeal in the sense that the Americans can see their worst fears about the Europeans, and the Europeans can see overprivileged American tourists get what’s coming to them, (RvB) Tokyo! (Unrated; 112 min.) Triple bill of surreal stories set in the Japanese capital—and the trio of gaijan directors aren’t too in love with the place from the evidence here: Michel Gondry’s subject is claustrophobia, Leos Carax’s semi–monster movie discusses wrath, and Bong Joon Ho takes on the hermeticism that makes Tokyo a city of strangers. Working from Gabrielle Bell’s comic Cecil and Jordan in New York, Gondry’s Interior Design concerns an indie filmmaker and his increasingly dissatisfied girlfriend, both futon-camping with a salarywoman friend in an infinitesimal apartment. When the filmmaker starts to achieve some small success, the lovelorn girl just becomes part of the furniture. Carax’s Merde is the pick of this litter, a real provocation right from the mot de Cambronne title to the promised sequel. A Tokyo sewer monster (Denis Lavart) stages gratuitous street attacks and faces Japanese justice for it. Godzilla meets Alfred Jarry in this breezily offensive story of a demon messiah. Bong Joon Ho’s Shaking Tokyo brings up the rear because it’s the most technically ambitious—a J.G. Ballard–style tale of a person who won’t leave his apartment, until he meets an alluring pizza-deliverer (Aoi Yu). Too cute to leave much impact. (RvB) 12 Rounds (PG-13; 108 min.) A policeman must jump through a dozen hoops to save his loved one. Directed by Renny Harlin.

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Watchmen (R; 163 min.) In 1985, in a parallel universe where Nixon has been president for a generation, the Cold War has been held in check by an American atomic Superman, a disassociative demigod known as Dr. Manhattan (Billy Crudup, looking like an indigo Ben Kingsley). After a public meltdown, he vanishes, leaving behind his lover, Laurie (Malin Akerman), and the beginnings of a seemingly inevitable nuclear war. Less noticed is the brutal murder of a former CIA assassin (Jeffrey Dean Morgan). The killing is investigated by a dogged but disordered masked man, Rorschach (Jackie Earle Haley), and his former partner (Patrick Wilson), the movie’s good cop. The intricate but rewarding adaptation of the Moore-Gibbons graphic novel by Zach Snyder invites comparison to Kubrick, for chill and scope, as well as occasional wonkiness. Crudup has all the power and remoteness of a deity. Read a full-length review at www.metroactive.com. (RvB) Wendy and Lucy (R; 80 min.) A gently made, simple story, with a great deal of compassion in it. As in director Kelly Reichardt’s previous feature, Old Joy, the Oregon surroundings mellow things out, while the sense of brewing ﬁnancial trouble keeps the tension going. If you’ve ever had the foolish reverie of getting a sleeping bag and hopping a freight train north, Wendy and Lucy idealizes that dream even while not succumbing to it. At one point, we see heroine Wendy Carroll (Michelle Williams), wearing a small blue riding hood, in a open boxcar cruising among the dreamy, foggy trees. Reichardt provides further realism in the use of natural sound, with occasional unsynched noise, such as the blare of train horns over talk at a campﬁre. Finally, as in Old Joy, Wendy and Lucy is about broke people trying to cope. Some poorer members of the audiences who see Wendy and Lucy will think this is a great movie on those grounds alone. Maybe they’ll just be responding to the attention they get so rarely. (RvB)

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FILM APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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CENTURY SAN JOSE 25 2

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CINEARTS@SANTANA ROW

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WORLD CENTRIC COMMUNITY SPACE

AMC MERCADO 20 &%& ;ln# <gZViZg^XVc E`ln#! ---#6B8#);JC

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FILM REVIEW

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San Mateo

[63]

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WARRIOR WARS Tfbo!Nbhvjsf!boe!Joejb!ef!Cfbvgpsu! tfoe!vq!uif!nfejfwbm!gboubtz!hfosf!jo!b!ofx!UW!tipx/

Dungeons & Drag â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;KrĂśd MĂ¤ndoonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; on Comedy Central picks up where Monty Python left off

LIGHTLY LESS OLD than the legends of ancient valor are the comedic archetypes satirizing them: the bubacious warrior princess, the hulking oaf, the fraudulent wizard, the ďŹ&#x201A;amboyantly gay sidekick andâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;leading them allâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the brave but half-bright rebel whose very name bears the umlauts of destiny themselves: in this case, KrĂśd MĂ¤ndoon. On April 9, Comedy Central airs director Alex Hardcastleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hour-long pilot episode for KrĂśd MĂ¤ndoon and the Flaming Sword of Fire. In brief, it has the goods. One thinks back happily on the book Bored of the Rings and Get Smart, back when that TV show was on its game. This high-production-value Middle-earth farrago, ďŹ lmed in Hungarian ďŹ elds and forests, includes sword ďŹ ghts and serious stuntwork. Sean Maguire has probably been cast to make the audience think of Ben Stillerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s would-be macho ditherers; his KrĂśd is a lowborn, good-hearted nebbish with ďŹ ne triceps, always outwitting the Empire by accident. (It should be mentioned that Maguireâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s principal credit is Meet the Spartans, but that movie is clearly not his fault.) The pilot sets up KrĂśdâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s destiny, as he and his rebels free the captive Gen. Arcadius (Roger Allam) from the empireâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dungeons. This also means freeing Bruce (Marques Ray), who had been the only consolation to the general during his ordeal as a prisoner (â&#x20AC;&#x153;Two weeks . . . and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a coed dungeon,â&#x20AC;? KrĂśd fusses). Already alerted, the insidious bald Chancellor Dongalor (a hilarious Matt Lucas of Little Britain) prepares a trap and conducts interviews (and second interviews) for assassins for hire. Dongalor and his henchman Barnabas (Alex McQueen) roll their râ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fragrantly as they scheme against the upstart rebels. Meanwhile, they admire their doomsday weapon: the Eye of Gulga Grymna, still closed and drowsing as monks try to get it online. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Noel Cowardâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;likeâ&#x20AC;? is not the phrase for KrĂśd MĂ¤ndoon: itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pitched for people who can remember Mad and Python routines word for word. However, it seasons the story with anachronism jokes and winks to the audience instead of laying out a platter of them. A newcomer, Remie PurtillClarke, makes a large impression as Dongalorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ever-shocked concubine. As the pagan warrioress Aneka, India de Beaufort might be smoldering enough to keep the primary audience of wised-up 12-to-24-year-old males watching just for her alone. In action scenes, she shows a brisk chirpiness, and she suffers fools happily, because there are plenty of them around. De Beaufort is the most appealing crossbow wielder since Sarah Michelle Geller. The gaylord jokes about Bruce are wooly and thick, but the generalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pet nickname for him, â&#x20AC;&#x153;insatiable meercat,â&#x20AC;? sums up the showâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lack of malice. In addition to satirizing reams and reams of barbarian ďŹ ction, KrĂśd MĂ¤ndoon zeroes in on Anxiety no. 1 for adolescents: the fear of being sexually unsophisticated. Mandoonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s own wide dumb spot is being a backward dismayed adolescent in the wide-open Meconian Empire. His love for the straying Aneka (who says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Sex is just one weapon in my arsenal!â&#x20AC;?) should keep this series lively. KrĂśd MĂ¤ndoonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s jealousy recalls the ďŹ rst parody of swords and sorcery, Ariostoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 1516 Orlando Furioso, with its pagan princess Angelica, and its all-over-the-map action. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a formula that works happily today. Richard von Busack KRĂ&#x2013;D MĂ&#x201E;NDOON airs Thursdays at 10pm on Comedy Central beginning April 9.

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CENTURY SAN JOSE 24 2

[64]

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

METROGUIDE

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 MUSIC

[65]

Classical Moves_67 Hookah Lounges _71

Mic in Track Thousands of rants and love songs have made it into the public domain, thanks to an accident of computer programming By Gabe Meline

‘W FOR THE RECORD

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HY IS My Sister Such a Dumb-ass?” is the most compelling 46-second sound recording since the turn of the century, and yet its creator, an adolescent boy, is nowhere to be found. It’s safe to assume he never intended a beautifully meandering ramble about his sister’s underwear, her “lesbian school” and her “awkwardness in a world that is undescribable” to be heard by anyone but himself. But through a phenomenon known as “mic in tracks,” his stream-of-consciousness diatribe has been heard, and loved, by thousands. Mic in tracks represent a unique time, 1999 to 2002, when many new PCs came packaged with software called MusicMatch Jukebox, allowing a user to record into the built-in microphone on the computer’s sound card. If that person forgot to name the ﬁle, as many did, it was saved under the default name “mic in track,” followed by a number. But if that person also happened to share his entire audio hard drive through widespread ﬁle-sharing programs like Napster, that small MP3 made in the privacy of one’s own room went out for the whole world to hear.

Naturally, in 2001, most Napster users were too busy downloading Eminem songs to care about anything labeled “Mic_in_track_033.” But to a select group of enthusiasts, including Cal Poly physics lecturer David Dixon, mic in tracks represented an incredible treasure trove of found art, a ready-made curation of audio vérité both fascinating and funny. Dixon began rabidly hunting down mic in track files on file-sharing sites, and each one, he says from his home in San Luis Obispo, was like a little Christmas present. “Once I started collecting them, I just couldn’t stop,” he says. “You have no idea what to expect when you download the file and start listening to it. Most of the time, it’s nothing, it’s literally nothing. Sometimes it’s just people taping things off the radio. But every once in a while, you hear something like what I have on the site.” The tracks Dixon has collected are unbelievable (www.stark-effect .com). A barbershop quartet sings a doo-wop version of Juvenile’s “Back That Ass Up.” A child bangs kitchen utensils against a mixing bowl and defends Willie Nelson to the tune of the Police’s “Every Breath You Take.” Two girls try to hold it together

singing a Christian pop song while a barking dog keeps interrupting. “Hi, this is Miriam Halstead talking,” announces a depressed-sounding teenage girl. “I like bunny rabbits. I like Satan. I like cheese and milk.” “Some of them are just really sweet, little slices of life,” Dixon says. “It’s like you’re peeking in through someone’s window.” But it’s more than voyeurism that makes Dixon’s ﬁnds so compelling; they present an actual psychological projection, as every track drips with empathy, placing the listener right there in front of the creator’s computer, to imagine all sorts of context. What happened, for example, to the relationship so poignantly eulogized in “I Love You Holly”? What compelled Casey and Liz to laugh uncontrollably while dedicating a Backstreet Boys song to Steve? Why are kids so into Insane Clown Posse? Dixon, who once recorded plays he wrote with his friends on a reel-to-reel recorder growing up in Waukesha, Wis., was sufficiently fascinated, and started recording songs based on mic in track samples under his studio name, Stark Effect. Some followed themes, such as the “kids screwing around” genre of “Stop! I’m Watching TV!” while others, like “That Darn

Bovine,” sampled key phrases matched up to drumbeats, a la Steve Reich’s Different Trains. After they became hits on a fan forum for experimental sampling group Negativland, Dixon continued with his wealth of source material (he’s got a full GB of mic in tracks on his home computer) and made an album, Mic in Track, available for free download on his site, along with 87 original mic in tracks. “I have been criticized online in a few places for invading people’s privacy by putting these things up,” he says. “And I admit that I kinda am. But some of these things just need to be shared. It is a little bit troubling sometimes, especially with stuff like ‘14,’” referring to a vile harangue that Dixon says he was hesitant to put up online before deciding that people needed to hear how ruthless and cruel kids can be, “but I think the goods outweigh the evils in this case.” Dixon has never found any of the creators of his mic in tracks, nor have any wannabe rappers or offkey singers come forward to claim their glory. They remain, like the boy behind “Why Is My Sister Such a Dumb-ass?,” an accidental celebrity, a nameless cross-section of American life. Is his sister really a dumb-ass? We’ll probably never know. M

[66] MUSIC

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 MUSIC

CONCERT FILE

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BILL F BILL FRISELLâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S RISELL Lâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;&#x2122;S DISFARMER DI SF FA ARMER PROJEC PROJECT CT

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Palace of Fine Arts Theatre Theatre

JOHN SCOFIELDâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S JOHN SCOF FIELDâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S PIETY PI ETY S STREET TRE EET B BAND AND

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CHRIS PO CHRIS POTTER TTER UNDERGROUND U NDERGROUND

Classical Moves

AMBROSE A MBROSE AKINMUSIRE AKINMUSIRE GROUP GRO OUP Palace of Fine Arts Theatre Theatre

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Palace of Fine Arts Theatre T Theatr e

Organic funk and fusion from one of the great saxophonists.

MAY MA AY

BRASS, B RASS, B BOWS OWS & B BEATS EA ATS SHOTGUN WED SHOTGUN WEDDING DDING QU QUINTET, INTET, REALISTIC R EALISTIC ORCHESTRA, ORC CHESTRA, L Y YRICS BORN & OTHERS OTHERS LYRICS Palace of Fine Arts Theatre T Theatr e

Trombonist Adam Trombonist m Theis debuts his 50-piece hip-hop symphon symphony. ny.

MAY MA AY

SSA A8 8PM PM

MARIZA M ARIZA

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Paramount Theatr Theatre e

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THE T HE FU FULL ULL S SPRING PRING S SCHEDULE CHED DULE

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AHMAD A HMAD JAMAL JAMAL KAYHAN K AYHAN K KALHOR A LH O R WITH BROOKLYN RIDER W IT H B ROOKLYN R IDE R SSunday, unday, A April pril 5, 5, 7 7PM PM

TINARIWEN T INA RIW E N HUGH H UGH MASEKELA MA SEKEL A FFriday, riday, A April pril 24, 24 , 8PM 8 PM

20 09 SFJAZZ 2009 SFJA ZZ GALA GAL A W WITH IT H M McCOY cCOY T TYNER YN E R SSaturday, aturday, April A pril 25, 25 , 6 6PM PM

MARIA M A R IA V VOLONTĂ&#x2030; O LO N T Ă&#x2030; TANGO TANGO JJAZZ A ZZ ENSEMBLE ENSE M B LE SSunday, unday, May May 31, 31, 2 2PM PM

KIM K IM NALLEY NA LLE Y THE THE SONGS SO N GS O OF F NINA NINA S SIMONE IMONE SSaturday, aturday, June June 6, 6 , 8PM 8 PM

SFJAZZ S FJA ZZ HIGH H IG H S SCHOOL C HOOL ALL-STARS ALL-STARS + E ERIC R IC H HARLAND ARL AND SSunday, unday, June June 7, 7, 8PM 8 PM

MICHAEL M ICHAEL WOLFF WO L F F T TRIO RIO

McCOY M cCOY TYNER T YN E R + B BOBBY OBBY H HUTCHERSON U TC H E R S O N SSunday, unday, A April p r il 2 26, 6, 7 7PM PM

SSaturday, aturday, June June 13, 13, 2PM 2PM

MINGUS M INGUS D DYNASTY YNAST Y + JJOHN OHN H HANDY ANDY

HIROMIâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S H IROMIâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S SONICBLOOM S O N I C B LO O M + DAVID DAVID F FIUCZYNSKI I U C Z Y N S KI

SSaturday, aturday, M May ay 9 9,, 2 2PM PM

Michael S. Gant

FFriday, riday, May May 29, 29, 8PM 8 PM

SOLD S O LD O OUT UT

SSunday, unday, M May ay 3 3,, 7 7PM PM

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KARRIN K A R RIN A ALLYSON LLYSON

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ROY HARGROVE ROY HARGROVE JJAMES A M ES C CARTER ARTE R

SSaturday, aturday, April A pril 4, 4 , 8PM 8 PM

MICHAEL M ICHAEL FEINSTEIN: F E I N ST E I N : THE SINATRA THE SINATR A PROJECT P R O J EC T

WITH W ITH A S SWINGINâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; WINGINâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; 17-PIECE 17- PIEC E BIG BIG BAND BA N D SSunday, unday, May May 10, 10, 7 7PM PM

BRAD B R AD M MEHLDAU EHLDAU Duo D uo with with M Matt at t Chamberlain: Chamb erlain : Friday, Friday, May May 15, 15, 8PM 8 PM SSolo: olo : Saturday, Saturday, May May 16, 16 , 8PM 8 PM ((Members M emb er s only) o nl y )

RICHARD BONA RICHARD BO N A A AND ND L LIONEL IONEL LOUEKE LO U E K E SSunday, unday, May May 17, 17, 7PM 7P M

FFriday, riday, JJune une 1 19, 9, 8 8PM PM

LINDA T LINDA TILLERY ILLERY A AND ND T THE HE CULTURAL C ULTUR AL H HERITAGE ERITAGE C CHOIR HOIR SSaturday, aturday, June June 20, 20, 3PM 3 PM

ALLEN A LLE N T TOUSSAINT O U S SA I N T Q QUARTET UARTET SSaturday, aturday, June June 20, 20 , 8 8PM PM

GO R AN B GORAN BREGOVIC REGOVIC A AND ND T THE HE WEDDING W E DDING & F FUNERAL U N ER AL O ORCHESTRA RC H E ST R A SSunday, unday, June June 2 21, 1, 7 7PM PM

DATE CHANGE

CĂŠU C ĂŠU SSaturday, aturday, July July 18, 18 , 8PM 8 PM

KENNY K ENNY BARRON BARRON TRIO TRIO FFriday, riday, May May 22, 22, 8 8PM PM

KEN NY B KENNY BURRELL URRELL QUARTET QUARTET RUSSELL R U SS E L L M MALONE A LO N E Q QUARTET UARTET SSaturday, aturday, M May ay 2 23, 3, 8PM 8 PM

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BATTLE B AT TLE OF OF T THE HE B BANDS: A N DS : G GLENN LENN MILLER MILLER ORCHESTRA O RC H E ST R A T TOMMY OMMY DORSEY DORSEY ORCHESTRA O RC H E S T R A SSunday, unday, M May ay 2 24, 4, 7 7PM PM BROUGHT B ROUGHT TTO OY YOU OU B BY Y

;g^! HVi! +/(%"./(%eb/ @VgVd`Z# .*- =dbZhiZVY GY! HVciV 8aVgV#

Info, sound clips and tickets tickets at sfjazz.org â&#x20AC;&#x201D;or call 866 6-920-5299. sfjazz.orgâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;or 866-920-5299.

a nonpr nonproďŹ t oďŹ t pr esenter of jazz presenter and education programs pr ograms

[68] CLUB LOUNGE

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

club gallery

metroactive.com/club-gallery

Qipupt!cz!Gfmjqf!Cvjusbhp

THE CARAVAN !Ivnq!Ojhiut!EKÖt!àfy!uifjs!tqjoojoh!qpxfs!!

po!Xfeoftebzt/

VOODOO LOUNGE!!Uif!Dmbz!Xiffmt!dfmfcsbufe!uifjs!21.zfbs!boojwfstbsz!Gsjebz/!

MISSION ALE HOUSE!!Uif!hppe!ujnft!spmm!

fwfsz!Gsjebz/

THE CELLAR!!Evctufq!efnboet!zpvs!voejwjefe!buufoujpo!Uivstebzt/

TRES GRINGOS!!Xfeoftebz!jt!!

Cffs!Qpoh!ojhiu/

JOHNNY V’S!!XfeoftebzÖt!Dzqifs!ojhiu!! qpvsfe!ubmm!xjui!b!tnjmf/

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

APRIL 1-7, 2009

[69]

[70]

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

RESTAURANT & NIGHTCLUB

1011 PACIFIC AVENUE SANTA CRUZ 831-423-1336

Thursday, April 2 AGES 16+

Thursday, April 9 AGES 16+ • In the Atrium

Martin Sexton Chris Trapper

FOX

$3 Adv./ $5 Dr. • Drs. 8:30 p.m., Show 9 p.m.

2215 2 215 B Broadway, roadway, Redwood Redwood City City All All Shows Shows are are "All "All Ages" Ages"

Special Guests

ALMOST CHAOS The Autumn Film

$3 Adv./ $5 Dr. • Drs. 8:30 p.m., Show 9 p.m. Friday, April 3 AGES 16+

plus

Good Neighbor Policy

also Check Raised and The Kingʼs Kids

Wednesday, April 15 AGES 16+

Band of Horses

Tussle

$18 Adv./ $18 Dr. • Drs. 7 p.m., Show 8 p.m.

Despot

Apr 10 Mike Pinto Free Show (AGES 21+) Apr 16 Turbonegro (AGES 16+) Apr 16 Euphoria vSC (AGES 16+) Apr 17 Collie Buddz (AGES 16+) Apr 19 Atmosphere (AGES 16+) Apr 19 Floater/ Zepperella (AGES 16+) Apr 20 Devin the Dude (AGES 16+) Apr 24 Sashamon (AGES 16+) Apr 26 The Grouch & Eligh (AGES 16+) May 2 ‘Your Music Olympicks Finals’ (AGES 16+) May 5 Aceyalone (AGES 16+) May 6 Steel Pulse (AGES 16+) May 7 Tech N9ne (AGES 16+) May 13 The Devil Makes Three (AGES 21+) May 14 The Devil Makes Three (AGES 16+) May 16 Bassnectar (AGES 16+) May 19 Robin Trower (AGES 21+) May 21 Dredg/ Torche (AGES 16+) Jun 6 Del Tha Funky Homosapien (AGES 16+) Jun 19 Easy Star All-Stars (AGES 16+) Aug 7 Johnny Winter (AGES 21+) Oct 21 UFO (AGES 21+)

Saturday, April 4 • AGES 16+

The Strangers I Want Out

$12 Adv./ $14 Dr. • Drs. 8 p.m., Show 9 p.m.

plus Saturday Night in the Atrium FREE SHOW SERIES No Cover • 9 p.m. • 21+

PROJECT: OUT OF BOUNDS E.A.R.L. • SHITBOX

OTT

Tuesday, April 7 AGES 16+ $16 Adv./ $19 Dr. Drs. 7 p.m., Show 7:30 p.m.

Sunday thru Tuesday FREE POOL for Bar Patrons Noon to Closing

Unless otherwise noted, all shows are dance shows with limited seating.

ROCKER’S PIZZA KITCHEN 831-426-PIZZA $1 Pizza Slice ALL DAY TUESDAYS

Wed. - Mon. $2 CHEESE OR PEPPERONI until 6 p.m.

Advance tickets are available at the Catalyst daily with a minimal service charge. Tickets to all Catalyst shows, subject to city tax and service charge, are also available by phone at 1-866-384-3060, and online at our web site

www.catalystclub.com

DARK STARR ORCHESTRAA 8pm 8 pm - $25 $25 adv./$28 adv./$28 door door

FFRI RI A pr. 10 10 Apr.

TTainted ainted Love Love

S AT SAT M ay 9 May

TThe he Sun Sun Kings Kings

9pm 9 pm - $20 $20 adv./$20 adv./$20 door door Remarkable R emarkable Tribute Tribute to to THE T HE BEATLES BEATLES plays plays the the M Music usic o off ST S STEELY TEELY D DAN AN 8 8pm pm - $ $20 20 a adv./$20 dv./$20 d door oor

plus p lus Aja Aja Vu Vu

plus The Drones plus A Decent Animal

also

$16 Adv./ $19 Dr. Drs. 8 p.m., Show 9 p.m.

SAT SAT A pr. 18 18 Apr.

$12 Adv./ $13 Dr. • Drs. 8 p.m., Show 9 p.m.

plus

NUMBSKULLSHOWS.com presents

GUTTERMOUTH

Thursday, April 2 • AGES 16+ • In the Atrium

also

Saturday, April 11 • ALL AGES • In the Atrium

$20 Adv./ $25 Dr. Drs. 7 p.m., Show 8 p.m.

plus

ABUSEMENT PARK plus

plus

Live L ive a at t t the he

FFRI RI M ay 1 5 May 15

TThe he Tubes Tubes

ffeat. eat. Fee Fee Waybill Waybill 8pm 8 pm - $25 $25 adv./$25 adv./$25 door door

Live L ive at at t the he

Little F Fox 2209 2 209 Broadway, Broadway, Redwood Redwood C City ity A Allll S Shows hows a are re ""21 21 and and over" over"

THU THU Apr. 9 Apr.

Gypsy G ypsy Soul Soul

FRI FRI Apr. 10 10 Apr.

Caravanserai C aravanserai

Acoustic A coustic Folk Folk Rock Rock 8pm 8 pm - $15 $15 adv./$17 adv./$17 door door

plus p lus Zanzibar Zanzibar

Tribute T ribute to to SANTANA SANTANA 8 pm - $13 $13 adv./$15 adv./$15 door door 8pm

SAT SAT Apr. 11 11 Apr.

Moonalice M oonalice ffeat. eat.

Barry Sless, Barry Sless, G.E. G.E. Smith, Smith, Peter P eter Sears, Sears, Ann Ann & Roger Roger McNamee, M cNamee, Jimmy Jimmy Sanchez Sanchez Roots, Rock, Roots, Rock, R&B R&B 8pm 8 pm - $14 $14 adv./$16 adv./$16 door door

FRI FRI Apr. 17 17 Apr.

Pride P ride & Joy Joy

SAT SAT Apr. 18 18 Apr.

Blues Guitar Blues Guitar EExtravaganza xtravaganza

Legendary Pop Legendary Pop & Soul Soul Band Band 9pm 9 pm - $18 $18 adv./$20 adv./$20 door door

ffeat. eat. Rene Rene Solis, S lis, Steve So Steve Freund, Freund, Vince V ince Caminiti, Caminiti, Kid Kid Andersen Andersen 8pm 8 pm - $13 $13 adv./$15 adv./$15 door door

aand nd eevery very Wednesday Wednesday

Redwood R edw ooWdesC City itoyasB Blues luBest!! eesst!!JJam am The T he West tC Coast's t's B 7 7pm pm - 1 11pm 1pm F Free ree A Admission! dmission!

650-369-4119 0-369-4119 www.foxdream.com www.foxdream.com

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 MUSIC

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ADVICE GODDESS APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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Bn ]jhWVcY VcY > ]VkZ cZkZg ]VY V \ddY gZaVi^dch]ê# LZ \di bVgg^ZY h^m nZVgh V\d WZXVjhZ ]Z cZZYZY hdbZdcZ id hVkZ ]^b [gdb Yg^c`^c\ VcY YZhigjXi^kZ WZ]Vk^dg! VcY > lVh hZZ`^c\ hdbZ hdgi d[ gZWZaa^dc# > [dgXZY ]^b id XaZVc je ]^h VXi Wn i]gZViZc^c\ id aZVkZ# =Z lZci WVX` id hX]dda! \gVYjViZY lî] ]dcdgh! ]Vh V \gZVi _dW VcY ^h gZheZXiZY Wn ]^h eZZgh# 6i ldg`! ]Z cZkZg b^hhZh V YZVYa^cZ dg YZiVâ! VcY ldjaY cZkZg Y^hVeed^ci V XdaaZV\jZ# 6i ]dbZ! ]ZÉh V XdbeaZiZan jc^ckdakZY [Vi]Zg! ]jhWVcY VcY ]djhZ]daY bZbWZg# I]Z h^beaZhi X]dgZ ^h idd bjX]# =Z dcan YdZh l]Vi ]ZÉh VWhdajiZan cV\\ZY id YZVi] id Yd# HeZcY^c\ i^bZ lî] djg ild X]âYgZc ^h Vcdi]Zg X]dgZ# ;dg ^chiVcXZ! ]Z lVh ZmXîZY VWdji djg *"nZVg"daY h^\c^c\ je [dg hdXXZg! Wji [djcY i]Z `^YhÉ aZV\jZ Yjaa VcY WZXVbZ jc^ciZgZhiZY ^c iV`^c\ ]^b id \VbZh VcY jclâa^c\ id ZkZc iV`Z ]^b id egVXi^XZ# 7ji [dg i]Z `^Yh! i]ZgZÉY WZ cd fjZhi^dc VWdji \Zii^c\ V Y^kdgXZ# >i lVh hije^Y id \Zi bVgg^ZY! Wji ]ZgZ lZ VgZ# ÅBVgg^ZY H^c\aZ Bdb Sorry, but who “rebels” by becoming a suburban housewife? What are you, from a long line of pimps, prostitutes and smackaddicted death metal artists? At least you’re clear on the fact that you married a man whose interest in children is akin to that of a guy I saw in Starbucks last month: intently reading the paper as his toddler ran around the place trying to pull a large iron sign over on himself, then seeing if he could crack his head open on any sharp objects. Yes, there’s hands-on parenting, hands-off parenting, and “Hey, wait—is that thing mine?” Your husband may have detached his lip from the beer bong and started getting gold stars at the office, but drinking was just a symptom of the person he was— and still is: an addict. Addicts are adult babies who refuse to endure boredom, disappointment and life’s struggles, grabbing for short-term gratification—no matter how destructive—and never mind how it mucks up tomorrow. As addiction treatment specialist Dr. Stanton Peele explains in 7 Tools to Beat Addiction, changing takes deciding another behavior—like giving your best

to parenting—has more value than the momentary escape, whether it’s into Wild Turkey country or just sitting there with your thumb up your nose watching TV instead of taking your kid to soccer. By trying to turn having a family into a form of rehab, you made your bed and you could be the only one ever making it. That might not be fair, but forget fair and go with what’s most important—encouraging your husband to step up and dad. Note the word “encourage.” Because men are achievement-oriented, you don’t get anywhere by nagging. Instead, praise the guy for what he’s accomplished so far, and explain that kids with an involved dad do better in school, social relationships, self-worth and even in their own adult relationships (per a bunch of studies out of Oxford). In other words, by enduring a little tedium with the soccer league, he’ll actually be making a substantial difference in the whippersnapper’s life. Give him props for even the smallest effort he makes with the kids, and he might eventually ﬁnd it within himself to take out the trash— and before it starts looking ready for a trainer and a cage.

:^\]i bdci]h V\d! > \di YjbeZY Wn bn Wdn[g^ZcY g^\]i Vh > WZ\Vc [Vaa^c\ ^c adkZ# I]Z cZmi \jn > YViZY `âaZY ]^bhZa[ YVnh V[iZg djg hZXdcY YViZ cdi WZXVjhZ d[ Vcni]^c\ id Yd lî] bZ # I]Z dcan \jn l]dÉh Vh`ZY bZ dji h^cXZ XVcXZaZY aVhi b^cjiZ id \d id ]^h \gVcYbdi]ZgÉh [jcZgVa# =Z egdb^hZY id gZhX]ZYjaZ! Wji ]VhcÉi XVaaZY# >Éb Vc ViigVXi^kZ! ^ciZaa^\Zci! k^kVX^djh ilZcinhdbZi]^c\! Wji >Éb hd Y^hXdjgV\ZY Vi i]^h ed^ci! >Éb Xdch^YZg^c\ \^k^c\ je# ÅI]gZZ"I^bZ AdhZg Oh, did you take the The Wizard of Oz literally? Because you’re pretty much coming out of your apartment and stamping your feet, “Hey! Where’s my yellow brick road?!” Let’s see . . . one guy dumps you, another doesn’t call you again because he’s dead, and a third cancels on you because his grandma’s dead, then flakes on rescheduling, and you’re ready to buy a rifle and a rocking chair and retire to

the woods. Hate to be the ﬁrst to break it to you, but life is rough. It kicks you in the teeth, then you get to the dentist and they don’t take your insurance. You can give up dating as one of life’s great hardships, or accept that it’s hard, and consider yourself lucky when a guy doesn’t call you again simply because he’s “just not that into you,” not because all that remains of him has been poured into an urn.

'%%.! 6bn 6a`dc! Vaa g^\]ih gZhZgkZY# <di V egdWaZb4 Lg^iZ 6bn 6a`dc! **% H# ;^ghi Hi#! HVc ?dhZ! 86 .*&&(! dg ZbV^a VYk^XZVbn5Vda#Xdb#

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y APRIL 1-7, 2009 CLASSIFIEDS

[79]

metro CLASSIFIEDS CLASSIFIED INDEX 77 79 79 79 79

PLACING AN AD 82 81 82 83 83

Single Services Employment Pets & Animals Family Services Music

Legal & Public Notices Mind, Body & Spirit Home Improvement Real Estate Automotive

Help Wanted

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Management

Call the Classified Department at 408.298.8000 Monday through Friday, 8.30am to 5.30pm.

√

Fax your ad to the Classified Department at 408.271.3520.

classifieds@metronews.com Please include your Visa, MC, Discover or American Express number and expiration date for payment.

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≈

DEADLINES: For copy, payment, space reservation or cancellation: Display ads: Thursday 3pm Line ads: Friday 3pm

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[80]

ASTROLOGY

APRIL 1-7, 2009 M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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6g^Zh (March 21–April 19): There’s plain old

everyday lightning, which travels about ﬁve miles, and then there are superbolts—strokes of lightning that are 100 times stronger than a normal ﬂash and that can travel over 100 miles. In the coming weeks, Aries, your power levels could be more like these superbolts than your usual output. I suggest you take advantage. Just assume that you’ll be able to shed more light and attract more attention than usual.

IVjgjh (April 20–May 20): When I was 19, I did Outward Bound, a wilderness survival course designed to make a man out of me. For 24 winter days, my team and I camped and traveled through New Hampshire’s White Mountains. Near the end of the ordeal, we were each required to do a three-day “solo” experience, during which time we were left alone with only three things: a sleeping bag, a canvas tarp to use as a partial shelter and a box of mincemeat. The latter was a concentrated slab of food made of raisins, dried apples, lemon rind, cinnamon, nutmeg, cloves and dried beef. As I shivered and worried and sang loud songs and battled my own wild thoughts during those challenging but enlightening 72 hours, I grew to savor my odd-tasting delicacy. It kept me sane and grounded. As you prepare for your own rite of passage, Taurus, I suggest you procure the metaphorical equivalent of mincemeat. <Zb^c^ (May 21–June 20): As reported in the U.K.’s Mirror, South African game warden Alex Larenty made a dramatic display of the trust he engenders among the animals under his care. Sidling up from behind to a full-grown male lion named Jamu, Larenty lightly grasped the beast’s balls and held on for a while. Jamu did not protest. I invite you to attempt the metaphorical equivalent of this brave encounter, Gemini. According to my reading of the omens, you have the power to play with ﬁre—and I mean “play” in every sense of the word. 8VcXZg ( June 21–July 22): In his book When

the Impossible Happens, Stanislav Grof describes a man named Kurt who was “very unhappy if there were no problems in his life and adversaries against whom to ﬁght.” Kurt didn’t just thrive on crises; he felt uncomfortable if he didn’t have any. In my vision of how your destiny is unfolding, Cancerian, you now have the ability to express a more temperate version of this capacity. What I mean is that you could be highly entertained and resoundingly moved by the dilemmas that come into your vicinity, but without going overboard into obsession. You could embrace the challenges in appreciation for the way they compel you to get smarter, but without clutching them desperately.

AZd ( July 23–Aug. 22): Philosopher Bertrand

Russell wasn’t so much interested in the “will to believe.” Rather, he preferred “the will to ﬁnd out, which is the exact opposite.” Your assignment, Leo, is to try his approach. Regard it as an experiment that you’ll have fun with. For a few days, refuse to jump to any conclusions whatsoever. Be skeptical of all theories about why things are the way they are. See if you can thrive without clinging to any ideology. Instead, be bursting with the intention to discover the raw truth, no matter where that leads you, and even if it seems to contradict your rules to live by.

K^g\d (Aug. 23–Sept. 22): There will be other times when I’ll encourage you to upgrade your relationships with your inner child, your inner mountain-climber and your inner serpent. Right now I hope you will take some quality time to commune with your inner elder. In my astrological opinion, you especially need the inﬂuence of this sage old part of you. He or she doesn’t care overly much about social status, romantic drama, or the obsession of the moment, but is more interested in what provides deep meaning, generates love and offers the big-picture perspective. So try this, Virgo: Leap ahead many years in your imagination and tune in to the guidance of the ripe and vibrant wise guy or wise woman you will ultimately become. A^WgV (Sept. 23–Oct. 22): The sirens are enticing

and wooing and tempting you again. This time they say have a really fabulous deal, even better than before. They’re sorry, by the way, about the somewhat deceptive advertising they used on the last occasion you came their way. They want to assure you that they’ll never again pull the bait-

and-switch routine. So are you ready to give them another chance? Don’t look to me for advice on what you should do. I’m simply here to report the situation. Besides, you need a good stiff test of your powers of discernment. Oh, one other thing: To demonstrate their sincerity, the sirens are offering you their ﬁrst song and dance absolutely free.

HXdge^d (Oct. 23–Nov. 21): The three tasks I

think you should work on in the coming week are among the hardest any human being can attempt. Luckily, you now have an unusually strong aptitude for them, and are likely to receive unexpected assistance if you’re brave enough to plunge ahead. Here they are. 1. Interrupt and overthrow negative trains of thought right in the middle of their ﬂow through your brain. 2. Negotiate partial solutions to complex problems. In other words, do the halfright thing when it’s impossible to do the totally right thing. 3. Understand that in order to graduate from a certain batch of weird karma that has persisted, you must completely accept the situation as it is, acknowledge your role in precipitating and prolonging it, and feel gratitude for all that it has taught you.

HV\^iiVg^jh (Nov. 22–Dec. 21): Some Japanese

employees receive three days of “heartache leave” per year from the companies they work for. During those times they can recover from sad experiences or romantic reversals. If it were up to me, every company in every country in the world would annually provide workers with the opposite kind of holiday: 10 days of “heart-soaring leave.” These would be times devoted to cultivating blessed breakthroughs or celebrating great happiness. If there were such a system in place already, Sagittarius, I bet you’d use some of those heartsoaring days in the coming weeks.

8Veg^Xdgc (Dec. 22–Jan. 19): Your symbol for the

week is the Mariana Trench, which is the lowest place on the earth’s surface. Located underwater in the Paciﬁc Ocean, it’s almost seven miles down— further below sea level than Mt. Everest is above sea level. I chose this natural feature for you to play with in your imagination because I’m hoping it will inspire you to explore the extreme depths. The coming days will be an excellent time to get better acquainted with the stuff that’s at the very bottom of your world.

6fjVg^jh ( Jan. 20–Feb. 18): Your IQ has crept up

beyond its usual level, and may ascend even higher in the coming days. I suspect you’re poised to erupt with a host of sharp insights, and maybe some brilliant analyses or strokes of genius as well. Why? How? It may have to do with the way the planets are massaging your brain chemistry. Or perhaps it’s because you smell freedom, and your libido is boosting your intelligence with the enhancements that only the onset of exhilaration can provide. I recommend that you milk this gift for all it’s worth. Don’t waste time on trivial conquests like polishing off crossword puzzles or acing online personality tests. Try to solve the mystery of the ages, or at least your two knottiest problems.

E^hXZh (Feb. 19–March 20): “So I sing to my seeds,”

says gardener Leslie Gaydos. “What about it?” Although she sounds a bit defensive about treating her unsprouted kernels like sentient beings, I hope you won’t be in the least apologetic as you carry out your assignment: Serenade your seeds. Bathe them in your tender concern. Infuse them with your intelligent love. Whether your seeds are literal plants or more metaphorical in nature, make it your priority to sweet-talk them and guide them into the next phase of their growth.

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M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

APRIL 1-7, 2009

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Inked-Out, 20860 Meadow Oak Rd., Saratoga, CA, 95070, Christopher Palmer. This business is conducted by a Individual. Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 3/01/09. /s/Christopher Palmer This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/04/2009. (pub Metro 3/11, 3/18, 3/25, 4/01/2009)

Mind Body, Spirit Meditation For Everyone Mediation and Buddhist thought with Mediation teacher Reed Sherman. Reduce stress and anxiety, improve relationships, find meaning and purpose in life, discover lasting inner peace. Classes are Wednesdays 7:30-9 Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Los Gatos, 15980 Blossom Hill Rd. Los Gatos, 95032. Call Kelsang Gamo at Duldzin Dragpa Buddhist Center 408/226-0595 for information and directions. www.meditationinsanjose.org

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #520935 The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Deez, 2900 Monterey Rd., Lot 154, San Jose, CA, 95150, Dwayne Fletcher, 1639 Pomona Ave., San Jose, CA, 95110. This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Dwayne Fletcher This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/05/2009. (pub Metro 3/11, 3/18, 3/25, 4/01/2009)

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[81]

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #520903

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FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT FICTITIOUS BUSINESS #521001 The following person(s) is NAME STATEMENT (are) doing business as: Fried Dough Xpress, 2200 #520844

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: FICTITIOUS BUSINESS Parkin Security Consultants, 160 Albright Way, Suite D, NAME STATEMENT Los Gatos, CA, 95032, #520179 Thomas C. Parkin, Inc. The following person(s) is This business is conducted (are) doing business as: by a Corporation. The state of Theory, 14417 Big Basin Way, Corporation: California. Saratoga, CA, 95070, Triangle Registrant began transacting International Inc., 3030 Kilo business under the fictitious Ave., San Jose, CA, 95124. business name or names listThis business is conducted by a Corporation. The state of ed herein on 2/27/1984. /s/Donald A. Kerr Corporation: California. Vice President #C1239529 Registrant has begun transacting business under the fic- This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa titious business name or names listed herein. Clara County on 3/03/2009. /s/Nozomi L. Kong Vice (pub Metro 3/11, 3/18, 3/25, President 4/01/2009) #C3107173 This statement was filed with the County FICTITIOUS BUSINESS Clerk of Santa Clara County NAME STATEMENT on 2/17/2009. (pub Metro #520845 3/11, 3/18, 3/25, The following person(s) is 4/01/2009) (are) doing business as: FICTITIOUS BUSINESS WorkSafe Technologies Global Sales, 160 Albright NAME STATEMENT Way, Suite D, Los Gatos, CA, #520849 95032, WorkSafe The following person(s) is Technologies of Northern (are) doing business as: California, Inc. This business Aristocrats, 161 N. Jackson is conducted by a St., Suite 1, San Jose, Ca, Corporation. 95112, Jeff Phan, 1241 Avenida Benito, San Jose, CA, The state of Corporation: California. Registrant began 95131, Patricio Dancel, 1369 transacting business under Tanaka Dr., San Jose, Ca, 95131, Ian Dancel. This busi- the fictitious business name ness is conducted by a gener- or names listed herein on al partnership. 2/23/2009. Registrant has not yet begun /s/Donald A. Kerr Vice transacting business under President the fictitious business name #C2410133 This statement or names listed herein. was filed with the County /s/Jeff Phan6 This statement Clerk of Santa Clara County was filed with the County on 3/03/2009. (pub Metro Clerk of Santa Clara County 3/11, 3/18, 3/25, on 3/03/2009. (pub Metro 3/11, 3/18, 3/25, 4/01/2009) 4/01/2009)

Eastridge Loop, SP#1106A, San Jose, CA, 95122, Eric Clayton, 1415 Ball Ct., San Jose, CA, 95122, Hilda Clayton. This business is conducted by a Husband and Wife. Refile of previous file #519753 due to publication requirement no met on previous filing. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Eric Clayton This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/06/2009. (pub Metro 3/18, 3/25, 4/01, 4/08/2009)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #520616 The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: 420 Smoke Shop, 436 E. Santa Clara St., San Jose, CA, 95113, Oneida E. Cardona, 4667 Whitwood Ln., San Jose, CA, 95130, Manuel Antonio Cardona. This business is conducted by a General Partnership. Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 1/01/2009. Refile of previous file #509429 with changes /s/Oneida E. Cardona This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 2/25/2009. (pub Metro 3/18, 3/25, 4/01, 4/08/2009)

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[82] STRAIGHT DOPE CECIL ADAMS

APRIL 1-7, 2009

M E T R O S I L I C O N VA L L E Y

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Lî] bdYZgc bZY^X^cZ VcY ]n\^ZcZ VcY Y^Zi! lZÉkZ ZmiZcYZY a^[Z ZmeZXiVcXn [Vg WZndcY l]Vi îÉh ZkZg WZZc# NZi lZ Vaa hiâa \Zi daY VcY Y^Z# ;Zl bV`Z î eVhi -% dg .% nZVgh! VcY Vabdhi cdWdYn bV`Zh î eVhi &%%# >h i]ZgZ Vcn gZVa ]deZ d[ hdbZi]^c\ i]Vi XdjaY Vaadl ]jbVch id hide dg hadl i]Z V\^c\ egdXZhh4 Å:g^X G#! Adh 6c\ZaZh My initial reply was: Want to stop aging? Move to the developing world, where they’ve got the problem licked. With frequent war, famine and disease, getting old isn’t an issue for vast swaths of the population. However, on reading your note more carefully, I see your beef about aging is that it makes you die, meaning early death probably isn’t the strategy for you. So instead I give you Cecil’s Guaranteed Longevity Plan. We’ll start with the easy steps and work up. Stop thinking. I’m sure you remember Molly Ivins’ remark about a Texas politician (no, not the one you’re thinking of): “If his IQ slips any lower, we’ll have to water him twice a day.” That guy was onto something. The chief killer of higher life forms such as ourselves is, no kidding, a brain. As I wrote years ago, living things lacking a central nervous system, notably trees, have been known to survive for thousands of years. Admittedly, judging from the examples we have—notably some barely-hanging-on pines in the California desert—so-called Methuselah trees lead pretty meager existences and probably long for the exciting life of pond scum. And yes, it’s hard to imagine how humans might manage without brains. But if you’ve watched many financial shows on cable, you know it can be done. Drink. OK, you’ve heard this before and figured it was a research fluke. Maybe not. A good-size body of research suggests one or two drinks a day can reduce your risk of death from all causes, especially heart disease and stroke. Better yet, toss back those drinks as part of a Mediterranean diet. According to the Harvard School of Public Health, ingesting an abundance of vegetables, legumes, fruits, nuts and cereals; plenty of olive oil; moderate amounts of fish; not too much dairy; only a little red meat; and a glass or two of wine at meals correlated with a huge drop in death rate among participants in a 2003 study. Needless to say, your basic barfly diet (beer, maybe some peanuts) boasts no such results. Sleep right. A six-year study of 1.1 million adults found that those sleeping seven hours a night had the lowest chance of dying. With less than six or more than eight hours per night, your mortality risk starts climbing. Too little sleep I can see being a problem, but what’s so bad about too much? So far, nobody knows. Eat less. Maybe you’ve heard this one too: Animals on calorie restriction (CR) diets live

longer. Scientists first noticed this when studying rats in the 1930s and later found the same thing with critters ranging from fruit flies to cows. Depending on the level of CR, life span in animals has been increased by more than 50 percent. Caveats: (1) can’t skip essential nutrients, (2) exercise is important, and (3) the animal’s weight must remain stable. Will CR work in humans? Not as dramatically, it seems, and we don’t have conclusive proof, but probably yes. The big benefit: a healthier heart. A six-year study in which participants downed half the usual calories found major improvements in cholesterol, triglycerides and blood pressure. If cutting back that much sounds too drastic, consider this. Adult residents of Okinawa, Japan, consume 20 percent fewer calories than other Japanese and have much lower rates of death from stroke, heart disease and cancer and better health overall. That doesn’t mean they live forever—Okinawans on average survive four years longer than Americans. (Some of that may be due to genetics.) Most estimates of life expectancy gains from CR give you 10 years at most. Drawbacks include irritability, less muscle, and malnutrition if you’re not careful. CR apparently works best when begun young, with less benefit the later you start. But come on. Are you going to turn down an extra 10 years? An extra four? One? Not ready for extreme fasting? Some tout alternative schemes. The EOD, or “every other day,” method, which involves a day of fasting followed by a day of double calories, seems to work as well as CR—for mice. A human friend who tried it says he lost a lot of weight, but then his heart started skipping beats so he quit. Here’s a plan I like better: one meal a day plus some noshing. Will you live to 150? Doubt it, but based on my limited sample (one), you’ll weigh what you did in high school and be mistaken for five years younger than you are.

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FICTITIOUS BUSINESS FICTITIOUS BUSINESS FICTITIOUS BUSINESS FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT NAME STATEMENT NAME STATEMENT NAME STATEMENT #521023 #521239 #521374 #521972 The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Fireside Cafe, 3375 Stevens Creek Blvd., San Jose, Ca, 95117, Hisham Ghanma, 679 Boid Dr., San Jose, CA, 95111. This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Hisham Ghanma This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/06/2009. (pub Metro 3/18, 3/25, 4/01, 4/08/2009)

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: ART by JORA, 1068 The Alameda, studio 13, San Jose, CA, 95126, Jora Casci, 35 North 11th Street, San Jose, CA, 95112. This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Jora Casci This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/11/2009. (pub Metro 3/25, 4/01, 4/08, 4/15/2009)

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Cosita Housecleaning, 140 Lewis Rd., #8, San Jose, CA, 95111, Marcelo Lara, 2800 Dan Pedro Rd., #27, Ceres, CA, 95307. This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Marcelo Lara This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/16/2009. (pub Metro 4/01, 4/08, 4/15, 4/22/2009)

doing business as: Ajmer Cariear Co., 1562 Montague Expressway, San Jose, CA, 95131, Ajmer Singh Baryana, 803 Cape Kennedy Dr., San Jose, CA, 95133. This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 3/2/2009. /s/Ajmer, Singh, Baryana This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/13/2009. (pub Metro 3/18, 3/25, 4/01, 4/08/2009)

BuyTiresUCanAfford, 477 Gavin Court, San Jose, CA, 95136, Ramon Y. Beals, Aileen Beals. This business is conducted by a husband and wife. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Ramon Y. Beals This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/13/2009. (pub Metro 3/25, 4/01, 4/08, 4/15/2009)

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: 1. Riley’s Bookkeeping Services, 2. RBS, 869, Lewis Ave., Sunnyvale, CA, 94086, Sarah Riley. This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Sarah Riley This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/13/2009. (pub Metro 3/18, 3/25, 4/01, 4/08/2009)

California, 2. Lien Doan Cu Tri Nguoi Viet Bac California, 3. Vavnc, 1704 Four Oaks Road, San Jose, CA, 95131, John Ngo, Phillip Huynh, 1492 Four Oaks Circle, San Jose, CA, 95131. This business is conducted by an unincorporated association other than a partnership. Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on March 3, 2009. /s/John Ngo This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/16/2009. (pub Metro 3/25, 4/01, 4/08, 4/15/2009)

doing business as: Cadija International, 1945 Grant Ave., Unit 2, Santa Clara, 95050, Ali Loh. This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 3/4/09. Refile of previous file #373442 with changes after 40 days of expiration date. /s/Ali Loh This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/04/09. (pub Metro 4/01, 4/08, 4/15, 4/22/2009)

total $500 or more (labor or materials) be licensed by the Contractors State License Board. State law also requires that contractors include their license number on all advertising. You can check the status of your licensed contractor at www.cslb.ca.gov or 1-800-321-CSLB (2752). Unlicensed contractors taking jobs that total less than $500 must state in their advertisements that they are not licensed by the Contractors State License Board.

And M Consultant, 747 Durshire Way, Sunnyvale, CA, 94087, David Shindler, Dorit Shindler. This business is conducted by a general partnership. Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 1/05/2008. /s/David Shindler This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/18/2009. (pub Metro 3/25, 4/01, 4/08, 4/15/2009)

#2, San Jose, Ca, 95116, Evangelina Salgado. This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on 3/18/2009. /s/Evangelina Salgado This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/18/2009. (pub Metro 4/01, 4/08, 4/15, 4/22/2009)

Affordable rates. Good service. Call anytime. 408/824-2259. It’s Divine!

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #521315 NAME STATEMENT #521308 The following person(s) is (are) #521778 The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: The College of Adaptive Arts, 1722 Manitou Ct., San Jose, CA, 95120, Pamela Lindsay. This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Pamela Lindsay This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/24/09. (pub Metro 4/01, 4/08, 4/15, 4/22/2009)

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Outback Builders, 2744 Aiello Drive, Suite 1000, San Jose, CA, 95111, Outback Engineering, Inc. This business is conducted by a Corporation.The state of Corporation: California. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Mark Adams President/CEO #2486990 This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/26/2009. (pub Metro 4/01, 4/08, 4/15, 4/22/2009)

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FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT FICTITIOUS BUSINESS Contractors FICTITIOUS BUSINESS #521378 NAME STATEMENT The following person(s) is (are) Notice To Readers NAME STATEMENT #520915 doing business as: 1. California law requires that #521307 Vietamerican Voters of Northern The following person(s) is (are) contractors taking jobs that

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FICTITIOUS BUSINESS FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #521303 Hauling NAME STATEMENT #521498 The following person(s) is (are) #521496 doing business as: We Cut Foam, The following person(s) is Immanuel’s Mighty 1248 Birchwood Drive, The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: Cell Sunnyvale, CA, 94089, Tal (are) doing business as: D City Wireless, 3140 Story Rd., Man Hauling Service Barnea, 880 Humewick Way, Sunnyvale, CA, 94087, Sigal Barnea. This business is conducted by a husband and wife. Registrant began transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein on March 10, 2009. /s/Tal Barnea This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/13/2009. (pub Metro 3/25, 4/01, 4/08, 4/15/2009)

FICTITIOUS BUSINESS NAME STATEMENT #521485 FICTITIOUS BUSINESS The following person(s) is (are) NAME STATEMENT doing business as: Shah, 97 S. #521629 2nd Street, San Jose, CA, 95113, Dahn Tran 954 Cape Anita Place, San Jose, CA, 95133, Nam H. Nguyen 647 Prada Drive, Milpitas, CA, 95035. This business is conducted by a general partnership. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Dahn Tran This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/17/2009. (pub Metro 3/254/01, 4/08, 4/15/2009)

The following person(s) is (are) doing business as: The Shout Lodge, 1016 Morse Ave., Suite 16, 17, Sunnyvale, CA, 94089, Tim Christol, 835 Lily Ave., Cupertino, CA, 95014 This business is conducted by a individual. Registrant has not yet begun transacting business under the fictitious business name or names listed herein. /s/Tim Christol This statement was filed with the County Clerk of Santa Clara County on 3/20/2009. (pub Metro 3/25, 4/01, 4/08, 4/15/09)

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real estate gg Real Estate Sales

Rentals

Homes Under $600K

Shared Housing

/ South San Jose THE MARKET IS MOVING Almaden Room fully furnished w Inventory is still high and interest rates are still at all time lows! These 2 factors make it a perfect time to start your home shopping! Call Team Thomas with David Lyng R,E. work4u.com 831/402-2442

g Homes

Soquel Just listed. On the park. 4 bedroom, 2 bath. $699,000. Roger Knapp, Sereno Group. 831/426-1199

Everything! Comcast TV & Wireless Internet. No smoking. Male preferred. Washer/Dryer & Kitchen privileges. Large Pool & plenty of parking. $760 Inclds Utilities. 408-268-1520.

Furnished Room For Male

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Willow Glen/Cambrian

2 bedroom, 1 bath, 850 sq.ft. condo. 2 private decks with grill. Access to swimming pool an hot tub. Washer/dryer. water/garbage paid. 2 parking spaces. $1625 plus deposit. 408-621-2249

Debt Management, Loan Modification, Credit Repair

Apartment/Cottage

Campbell - One Month Free Rent Spacious 1 bedroom 1 bath $1195, Jr. 1 bedroom $1025, 2 bedroom 1 bath upstairs $1300, downstairs $1395. Townhouse $1500. Huge 3 bedroom 2 bath $1795. Great community close to Downtown Campbell. Close to all major freeways. 408/374-8203.

Los Gatos

Beautiful Senior Complex near downtown. Best in complex, 3 bedroom, 2 bath condo on ground floor. Large living room and separate dining room, two large patios, new stove, new microwave, new carpeting and more. Covered parking within security gate. Across greenbelt from the pool, spa and rec room. Water, garbage and homeowners dues paid. Available now. Call 530 265 4415

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5 acres. Good access - close to town. Beautiful setting. Phone, power and will serve letter. $299,000. Contact Deborah J. Donner, Donner Land and Mortgage Co., Inc. 408/395-5754 or www.donnerland.com

Boulder Creek

Hopkins Gulch. 16 acres. It used to be a helicopter landing pad. Full sun, tremendous views. Easy We can help eliminate your credit access. PSDR done. Good well. card debt. Reduce your loan pay- E-Z location. Timber Preserve Zoning. $529,000. Shown by ment. Reduce your Principle. Fixed Interest Rate. Meetings with appointment only. Contact Deborah J. Donner, Donner Land a real estate attorney, CPA, and Mortgage Co., Inc. Financial Planner. Complete 408/395-5754 or Financial training courses. Call www.donnerland.com Ken for more information 916-273-4925 or 408-891-8668

gg Furnished room in Evergreen area in San Jose with shared bath. $1000 per month plus deposit. 408/390-7625.

Boulder Creek Jamison Creek Road

Land

Boulder Creek This one is a beauty! Come see. $270,000!!! Bloom Grade. 5 acres. TPZ. Private road. Serene and quiet. By the golf course. Ridge-top view. Beautiful. Power and water. Pad cleared. Shown by appointment only. Contact Deborah J. Donner, Donner Land and Mortgage Co., Inc. 408/3955754 or www.donnerland.com

Los Gatos Mountains

Ormsby Road. 20 acres. Fire sale!! Yes, it was burned and now you can see the terrain. It's already turning green! Spring. Tremendous views. $369,000. Adjacent 20 acres available at $149,000. Owner financing. Shown by appointment only. Contact Deborah J. Donner, Donner Land and Mortgage Co., Inc., Broker at 408/395-5754 or www.donnerland.com

APRIL 1-7, 2009 CLASSIFIEDS

[83]

0913

Metro’s

To place your ad call

Backpage

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