The Miami Hurricane: February 13, 2018

the case for self-love Valentine’s Day Guide, Page 8

Photo by Hunter Crenian // Design by Emily Dulohery

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NEWS

THE MIAMI HURRICANE

February 13, 2018 - February 19 , 2018

STUDENT LIFE

Long-distance love: students give it a shot

By Amanda Herrera News Editor news@themiamihurricane.com @_amandaherrera

Making the best out of long distance

Starting a long-distance relationship wasn’t in junior Alex Mennella’s plans when he met his significant other. However, a year and seven months into his relationship, he can’t imagine it any other way.

The Chicago native was just looking for a summer job to earn a few extra bucks in 2016. He started working for the maintenance department in a park district in his hometown. The workers would often sit in the lifeguard sheds. There, he met Ashleigh O’Donnell, who he would soon find out was a senior in high school.

Mennella asked her on a date in July 2016. Soon after, he said he knew he wanted their relationship to become more than just a summer fling.

“The more we hung out, I started to think, ‘Man, I really want to stay with this girl and I’m willing to put up with the distance for her,’” said Mennella, a marketing major.

Both discussed making the relationship long term and agreed to try a long-distance relationship, even though Mennella was headed back to the University of Miami at the end of the summer.

Mennella, who had never been in a long-distance relationship before, said it was hard to adjust to life without O’Donnell.

He flies back to Chicago for all of spring, summer, Thanksgiving, winter and fall breaks. Even so, Mennella said they only spend about 5 1/2 months out of the entire year together.

During summer break, Mennella and his girlfriend spent all three months together. When it was time for him come back to Miami, they spent an hour saying goodbye.

“It was bad,” he said. “So it just shows you how much we really care about each other.”

However, this year, as Hurricane Irma would have it, Mennella was able to fly back for about three weeks.

Mennella said the two

components that make his longdistance relationship work are trust and communication. The pair makes sure to talk on the phone with each other for one hour each day to catch up.

“You have to know that the other person cares about you and that they’re not going to do anything that’s going to be stupid or hurt the way that you’re going to be in the relationship,” he said.

However, he said even with trust and communication, it hasn’t gotten easier.

“I have to pick up my whole life, drop my whole life down here, then pick it back up and drop it back off in Chicago,” Mennella said. “It’s been really tough on me.”

When it doesn’t work

They say distance makes the heart grow fonder. But some, including junior Tiffany Kaplan, may argue that it doesn’t. Sometimes, it does the opposite.

Kaplan, a double major in elementary special education and psychology, started her freshman year still dating her high school boyfriend, Richard Martinez. While Kaplan went off to college, her boyfriend stayed back home in California to attend school. Kaplan found comfort in the security of her relationship while spending much of her time meeting fellow students and exploring her new surroundings.

“You have that one person you know even though they’re not necessarily there with you,” Kaplan said. “While you’re not super comfortable around everyone around you.”

In fact, initially, Kaplan didn’t think maintaining a long-distance relationship in college would be “too hard.” Kaplan and her then-boyfriend had gone to different high schools throughout their relationship before college.

“We didn’t see each other that often anyways,” she said. “I didn’t think it would be a huge change, though it would definitely be something different.”

However, as the academic year rolled on, Kaplan found sustaining a

Sydney Harley// Contributing Photographer LOVE FROM AFAR: Junior Alex Mennella has maintained a long-distance relationship through more than 1 1/2 years of his college career. He credits strong communication and trust for the success of his relationship with his girlfriend, Ashleigh O’Donnell. The pair met while working over the summer of 2016.

relationship harder than she expected.

She said lack of communication and the time difference between Miami and California killed her relationship.

Kaplan said initially the pair attempted to combat the time difference by setting specific times throughout the day to talk over the phone. But when their schedules didn’t match up, the distance became too much.

Kaplan and Martinez broke up in March 2016.

However, her first experience with long-distance relationships didn’t discourage her from trying again.

Kaplan began dating Skylar Nivon the summer before her sophomore year. He, like her former boyfriend, stayed in California, and worked a full-time job while Kaplan moved back to Miami for school.

But the lack of face-to-face interactions, even with FaceTime, and the difference in time zones still placed a huge burden on the relationship. The strain intensified when Kaplan stayed in Miami during summer 2017.

Kaplan and Nivon broke up right before Hurricane Irma, in September.

Inevitable long-distance relationships

Senior Jihad Shatara met his girlfriend like many students do – at

school.

Shatara met UM sophomore Athena Koumanelis last year after living on the same floor in Eaton Residential College. What initially started as a close friendship, full of dining hall runs and “Big Brother” binges, soon turned into a romance.

He said he knew he wanted more than just a friendship with Koumenalis when they saw a performance of the “Children of Eden” together at the Ring Theatre in spring 2017.

Soon after, they went on a date to RA Sushi. After a few more dates, they decided to make it official, though hesitantly.

“The reason we took so long to start dating, or to make it official, was because the summer was coming up,” Shatara said.

The upcoming summer break presented a challenge for the couple.

Shatara would be interning at NBC 6 in Miami while Koumanelis would be working full time in her hometown of Nashville.

“That’s the toughest part,” he said. “Most people do long-distance over the summer when they’re in school but they visit. We didn’t do anything like that.”

For Shatara, it was hard to adjust

to his girlfriend’s physical absence.

“It’s hard when little things would pop up,” he said. “You want to go watch a movie or you want to go hang out with your friends but you can’t bring her. It’s different.”

Shatara, a broadcast journalism major, said he and Koumanelis made the short span of the long-distance relationship work by texting each other in the morning a rundown of their upcoming schedules for the day. Shatara said SnapChatting and FaceTiming every day helped keep the rhythm of the relationship from running into monotony.

“Going three straight months without having her by my side, it was hard,” Shatara said. “But I don’t think we missed a beat, to be honest.”

Looking ahead, Shatara will be graduating this spring. After having made it through long-distance for a few months, Shatara said the pair have been talking about how their relationship will pan out in the future. Shatara said he’s not afraid to try it again.

“We’re going to take it day by day,” he said. “I know it sounds cliché, but there’s no point in getting sad over timing about what’s going to happen in May. We’re going to enjoy the moment now and revisit it.”

THE MIAMI HURRICANE

February 13, 2018 - February 19 , 2018

NEWS

STUDENT GOVERNMENT

Polls open for Student Government elections

By Amanda Herrera News Editor news@themiamihurricane.com @_amandaherrera

After a slew of plot twists on the road to election, voting has officially commenced for Student Government Executive and Legislative Branch positions. Eighteen names of students appear on the ballot with eight seats up for election on SG Senate and three for executive positions.

SG unveiled its new voting system at 12:01 a.m. Feb. 12 by allowing students to vote online at any given time though 11:59 p.m. Feb. 14. In previous years, students could only vote during certain hours of each election day.

Now, students can vote at sg.miami. edu/vote or by logging onto OrgSync 24 hours a day. Elections Commission Chairman Luis Goberna said the commission tested the system with “extended voting hours” last semester and saw an increase in turnout rates.

Goberna, a junior, said the new 24-hour system is expected to increase turnout rates and provide students with a better experience.

Students still have an opportunity to the meet candidates before voting at 12:30 p.m. Feb. 13 in the Rathskeller.

If you can’t make the event, don’t sweat it. Here’s what you’ll find on the ballot when you go to vote:

Executive Branch

Initially, the “U First” and “We Got You” tickets were set to go headto-head against one another for the available three executive positions.

However, candidates Matthew Wenstrom and Ashlyn Coleman of We Got You indicated to Goberna on Feb. 2 that both wanted to withdraw from the race. Then, on Feb. 7, the remaining candidate of the We Got You ticket, Nishan Ravichandran, also said he will not be participating in any campaigning events.

Because all the individuals of the We Got You ticket indicated they wanted to withdraw from the race after the deadline to do so, their names will still appear on the ballot.

Any student is eligible to vote for SG Executive Branch positions.

Students are able to vote for the ticket as a whole or for each individual separately. Constituents can also write in candidates on the ballot.

As of 7:30 p.m. Feb. 12, 332 people had voted in the executive race.

Legislative Branch

The plot twists in the run for the SG Executive Branch positions are not the only shakeups in the elections. Just as SG was experiencing low registration turnout rates as the election deadline approached, multiple candidates signed up to run for various

available positions in SG Senate in the hours leading up to the cutoff date.

However, according to Goberna, Amanda Beyrer mistakenly registered to run for the available transfer student seat when she intended to run for the commuter student seat. The Elections Commission voted 7-1 to allow Beyrer’s registration to be amended and allow her to run for the commuter student seat.

The amendment left no one in the running for the available position as senator for the transfer student population.

Another candidate, vying for the position of School of Communication senator, failed to sign in at the Mandatory Candidates Meeting.

The candidate was disqualified from running and removed from the ballot.

Yiorgos Takoudis, a candidate vying to be School of Business senator, indicated he wanted to withdraw from the race. However, similar to the candidates from We Got You, he was denied his intent to withdraw and will still appear on the ballot.

Students are only allowed to vote for seats of which they are constituents of.

Constituents are still able to write in candidates for each position including the open transfer seat position that has no registered candidates running.

2018 SG Candidates President Evan De Joya (U First) Matthew Wenstrom (We Got You)

Vice President Catherine De Freitas (U First) Nishan Ravichandran (We Got You)

Treasurer Rafael Cariello (U First) Ashlyn Coleman (We Got You)

School of Communication Senator Abigail Bryman

Business School Senator (one open seat) David Tzeel (incumbent) Patrick Bauer Jasmin Dakkak Micaela Stoner Yiorgos Takoudis Charles Rilli

College of Arts and Sciences Senator (two open seats) Joseph Krupar Micah Council

Commuter Senator (three open seats) Amanda Lopez-Cardet Amanda Beyrer Kathleen Kean Marisol Fernandez

Election results will be announced 5:30 p.m. Feb. 15 at the Lakeside Patio.

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NEWS

THE MIAMI HURRICANE

February 13, 2018 - February 19 , 2018

STUDENT LIFE

The name on Drake’s $50,000 check

By Amanda Herrera News Editor news@themiamihurricane.com @_amandaherrera

Around the country, and maybe even around the world, junior Destiny James became known as “the girl who met Drake” in a matter of minutes on Feb. 5. However, the true story behind what led to James’ once-in-a-lifetime experience began way before then – back when Drake was still Aubrey Graham.

James describes her home, Denmark, in South Carolina’s “low country,” as an area with a lot of small towns, a region “that is often looked down upon.” She was brought up in a single-parent household, was educated in the public school system and had limited resources. James had odds stacked against her from the start, she said.

Students at her high school were stereotyped as kids who weren’t going to really “go anywhere,” or if they did, they’d eventually “just give up” on their dreams. James turned that negativity into motivation to break through the barriers, even from a young age.

“I’ve always had this go-aboveand-beyond attitude since elementary school,” said James, a public health major. “I started reading at 3. I would even fight with my older sister when she was 5 or 6 because she wouldn’t let me read her Chicken Noodle Soup books.”

When it came time to apply for college, she applied to two schools: the University of Miami and Harvard University. She eventually interviewed with Harvard, but immediately after she received her acceptance letter from UM, what she called “her dream school,” she knew it was all about the U. Even pursuing her dream was a bold move. James said students from her high school didn’t believe they’d be able to attend their dream schools, so they didn’t apply.

But James did.

“At the end, the worst thing they can say is no ... But I applied and I got accepted,” she said. “So I was

like, ‘Wow, I proved so many people wrong.’ But then again, there were also so many people that did believe me, so I proved so many people right.

That’s what motivated me.”

Though getting accepted to UM was a dream come true, what would follow was more than two years of financial and emotional woes. James was able to attend the university thanks to financial aid. The cost of the school was not fully covered though, leaving James and her mother to find a way to ensure her dream wouldn’t die.

James said she spent the majority of her freshman year stressed about being able to afford college.

At one point, she even considered transferring schools because she couldn’t afford to attend UM. She picked up a job in the Department of Teaching and Learning during the first week of her freshman year to ease the pressure, but her mother still had to come up with more than $400 a month. The financial obligations affected James’ daily life.

Because of the additional financial stressor, she said she found herself focusing more on being able to afford school than on actually making the most out of her academic experience. She said her grades suffered greatly because of it.

“When I had a certain bill coming up, I would literally obsess over when the pay period starts and ends,” James said. “I would try to squeeze in as many hours and go to my WorkDay and write down all my hours and see how big my check was going to be.”

Then, during her freshman year, James’ father was diagnosed with stage-four lung cancer. The cancer would eventually spread to his liver and spine. He died two weeks after her freshman year ended.

James questioned whether she could keep attending UM. She said she tried getting more help through the financial aid office, hoping that she’d be given more money when her account was adjusted to exclude her father’s income.

Still, she owed hundreds of dollars a month, she said.

So she took up another job as a security assistant for Housing and Residential Life.

As James started looking ahead, she knew that she needed extra financial assistance in order to continue pursuing her education.

She applied for multiple scholarships and interviewed with members of the Black Alumni Society for a scholarship. She shared her story with them and was awarded $4,500. That scholarship, along with need-based aid and loans, allowed her to attend UM for her third year.

Then, superstar rapper Drake came into the picture.

James said she received a phone call from Darlene Rebello-Rao, assistant vice president of university advancement on Feb. 3. Rebello-Rao told James she wanted to feature her in a video to motivate alumni to donate.

On the afternoon of Feb. 4, Rebello-Rao met up with James and took her to the stairs of the Frost Music School. There, James was told to sit under one of the arches of the staircase and tell her story in front of a camera.

Word started to spread about Drake’s rumored music video shoot on campus. James had heard it and was a little upset that she would be missing his appearance. Little did she know the Grammy-award winner came to the school for her.

Drake walked down the steps of the Frost School of Music and gave James a $50,000 check.

Senior Antonio Mercurius met James during her freshman year, when she joined a poetry club he was in. Mercurius said he was shocked because he didn’t know what was going on but he felt like she was the one who deserved the scholarship.

“Destiny is very passionate, very kind-hearted,” said Mercurius, a double major in health science and Africana studies. “She always puts her friends and family first.”

James said Drake made their encounter one of a kind.

“He said, ‘I’ve read a lot about you,’” James said. “’I’ve heard your story and all the things you’ve been

Hunter Crenian // Visuals Editor DESTINED FOR GREATNESS: Destiny James recieved $50,000 from rapper Drake after he heard of the compelling life story she shared with UM alumni when applying for scholarships last year.

through and all the hard work you’ve been putting in, so I want to give you $50,000 to pay for your tuition.’”

James said she thanked Drake over and over again and even went upstairs to the third floor of the Shalala Student Center to get a firsthand look at his shoot for his music video for “God’s Plan.” After his visit to campus, Drake reached out to James by direct messaging her Instagram and reiterating his support for her.

Mercurius called James someone who “lifts as she climbs.”

“She’s never trying to purposefully leave someone behind,” he said. “She’s always making sure she’s including people and is really a great team player.”

Mercurius said James’ encounter with fame hasn’t changed her one bit.

“She’s still the same Destiny that we all know and love,” he said.

Now, with money to pay her tuition senior year, James is focusing on enjoying her last two semesters.

James plans to get her master’s degree in public health with a specialization in disease prevention, and then move back to South Carolina to educate those who live in the cities and towns of the low country.

For James, no matter how hard the journey from the bottom has been, it’s been worth it, and she encourages others to keep going, too.

“This was 2 1/2 years of stress, depression, long nights, tiresome days, and it paid off,” she said. “You can’t just expect your breakthrough to be something great if you didn’t have a journey.”

THE MIAMI HURRICANE

February 13, 2018 - February 19 , 2018

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OPINION

THE MIAMI HURRICANE

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CULTURE

February 13, 2018 - February 19 , 2018

Opinion

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Local dating scene uninspiring Valentine’s Day has gone from a celebration of love to another overcommercialized holiday saturated with anxiety and high expectations;

By Nicole Macias and in Miami, the Senior Columnist problems are even easier to see.

Having lived in Miami all my life and gone through high school and now college, I am underwhelmed by the city’s dating atmosphere, mainly because most people are only interested in surface-level relationships—a product of the constant partying that gives Miami its reputation. The situation is especially bad once you graduate: according to economist Jon Birger, the amount

of college-educated women under 25 is 86 percent higher than collegeeducated men of the same age. This can make it even harder to find guys I relate with.

And of course, as a city known for its lavish yacht parties, beach-side cocktails and grand openings of highend bars, there remains little room for sincere relationships to develop.

The obsession with presenting a perfect image, too, makes it difficult to develop something real in Miami’s dating scene.

It’s difficult to really get to know someone when everyone is opting to hook up instead of forming a more lasting connection, or when people are more concerned with the image of a relationship than the work behind it.

A 2013 study by the American Psychological Association found that 60 to 80 percent of North American

college students have had a hookup – even though 63 percent of college men and 83 percent of college women said they would still prefer a traditional relationship.

It can seem as though everyone is paralyzed with fear of commitment, causing them to ruin some great relationships or close themselves off entirely, preventing any from ever beginning.

Dating has become casual to the point that many people often can’t tell the difference between dating and “talking,” the hard-to-define phase in which you spend time together but just aren’t that serious.

Over the years I’ve had experiences with people who were content wasting my time, as well as their own, with endless “talking” and never moving forward. People, in Miami especially, seem so scared

to be vulnerable and real with other people that they become emotionally unavailable. And that’s a huge turnoff.

In order to successfully navigate our city’s tricky dating scene, we really need to know what we want, and what we don’t want. We need to stand our ground and be firm in expressing how we deserve to be treated. We shouldn’t change who we are just because someone else is unwilling to compromise in a relationship.

It would also help us if we took a page from our parents, or people from a generation that worked to make relationships last. Maybe if we put more time and genuine effort into looking for the relationships we really want, we just might just find it.

Nicole Macias is a sophomore majoring in English.

THE MIAMI HURRICANE

February 13, 2018 - February 19 , 2018

OPINION

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PERSONAL FOCUS

Embracing volunteer work led me to my dream job Being a pharmacy postgrad from India and coming from a very different background, my journey was not easy. But in

By Saba Ansari volunteering healthcare Guest Columnist the field helped glue me together, and, ultimately, brought me to my dream career.

I was trained in a medical background about how drugs work – their pharmacokinetics, p h a r m a c o d y n a m ic s, pharmacology, mechanism of action – but figuring out how to mix and match and fit into the domain of research was a challenge for me.

I wondered how to justify my six years of pharmacy education now that I was a research volunteer at the University of Miami.

Sometimes, I even thought, “Oh come on, what am I even doing here? Is this the place for me? Do I belong here?”

One unexpected tool that helped me along the way was writing. When I was younger, I began writing poems and slowly started writing articles. It started with small articles; my papa corrected or gave more ideas which inspired me to keep my passion going strong. Ultimately, over the course of seven years, I had about 50 articles published in The Times of India.

This passion for writing led me to edit manuscripts and paperwork as part of my volunteer research

work. What I am today, and what I will become in the future, I owe to the support and affection of my parents – and the love of writing they instilled in me.

Eventually, I started taking interest in experiment protocols.

With a small set of experiments, learning about the reagents, apparatus and equipment inventory control, I began my journey. From short to long hours, my work on experiments began to grow.

My partner, Anis Ahmad, was here as a post-doc, and I shadowed him day and late night through in-vitro, in-vivo and animal-based experimental work. Together, we worked together these two years on all projects big and small, attended conferences and had fun fights over the designing of posters.

I relished the journey and took

delight in my volunteer work. Over time, the faculty began tossing more responsibility my way, which gave me opportunities to multitask and learn new skills. People stopped seeing me as just a competent resource and started depending on me to get things done.

My mentor took a chance on me as a potential employee and helped me transition from a volunteer to a research laboratory technician here at UM. But this journey is not unique to the healthcare field. Education, training, volunteer experiences and passion can make you a perfect fit anywhere. Volunteers should give their unpaid job the same level of respect they’d give a paying gig because by helping out in so many small, different ways as a volunteer, you can actually make yourself

indispensable.

Taking pride in your work goes a long way. When it comes time to hire new workers, those employers will remember your professionalism as a volunteer.

Volunteering offers you the chance to network with people in your related field, demonstrate your skills and learn new ones, too. Treat your volunteer position like a job.

Take your tasks and assignments seriously, perform religiously with dedication and consistency in quality of work – and you may just end up in a career you truly love.

Saba Ansari is a guest columnist.

She is a research laboratory technician in the Department of Radiation Oncology at the Sylvester Comprehensive Cancer Center.

PERSONAL NEWS

Applying the lessons of Fun Day to all unfamiliar faces If you were within five miles of campus on Feb. 3, you surely heard the jovial pandemonium of this year’s FunDay, UM’s oneof-a-kind service

By Dana Munro day that partners Staff Columnist students with adults with disabilities from across Miami.

While the day may be for those adults, affectionately dubbed “buddies,” I find it’s typically much more transformative for the students who are unaccustomed to working with people with disabilities,

particularly those participating for a club or for service hours for Greek Life.

Many college students spend their time swaddled within the security of their social circle. We like to spend time with those we feel most comfortable with and those most similar to us. We seek people in our clubs, classes and religious groups to befriend, thinking our chances of forming connections will be increased by the quantity of superficial similarities we share.

However, FunDay has an incredible capacity to debunk this myth.

At one point during the event, my buddy approached a student who seemed intimidated, unable

to predict the behavior of this unfamiliar person. My buddy put forth his hand for a fist pound.

A wave of relief washed over the student as he reciprocated it.

The student saw that my buddy simply wanted to make a connection with him. They didn’t share an ethnicity, age, language or disability, but my buddy didn’t care. He just wanted to connect with someone.

As I watched people of every color, language and gender intermix and the boundaries melt away, I concluded that it’s time we take a page from the buddies.

If they have the space in their hearts for those different from them, why shouldn’t we?

While, of course, our admiration and friendships among those similar to us are entirely valid, we miss out on a potential goldmine by residing safely at home in our little bundle of familiar traits. Remaining open to all kinds of people can add incredible dimension to our lives.

And this pattern is a dichotomy.

Those we loathe often bear the most similarities to us. Many of us recoil at the speech of our current president – conversational and rife with grammatical flaws – despite its familiarity and similarity to our own speech.

Bottom line: we are not the gold standard. We do not contain every good trait and are not void of every

bad trait. If we assess people based on the extent to which they are carbon copies of ourselves, we will have a very colorless life. Instead, it is best to evaluative people holistically.

Love and hate are far more complex than commonalities and differences – all the more reason to go through life giving everyone the benefit of the doubt, not distancing ourselves from each other based on superficial characteristics but listening to our instincts to find our friends. Aspire to go through life ready to give each and every passerby a welcoming, hardy fist pound.

Dana Munro is a sophomore majoring in musical theater.

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FROM COVER

THE MIAMI HURRICANE

February 13, 2018 - February 19 , 2018

THE MIAMI HURRICANE

February 13, 2018 - February 19 , 2018

FROM COVER

EDITORIAL AROUND MIAMI

V-Day date ideas for you and your boo

By Anya Balsamides Contributing Edge Writer

GLASS HALF FULL

Your best Valentine is yourself Oh, Valentine’s Day, the quintessence of irony: a holiday about love that has an unparalleled ability to tap into our innermost feelings of

By Dana Munro self-hate.

Staff Columnist There are five stages of Valentine’s Day grief. Let me break them down.

First is self-loathing: you realize your singleness can be traced back to the fact that you are utterly unlovable.

Second is jealousy: why aren’t you able to post a shameless, self-indulgent anniversary photo compilation on Instagram like everyone else? Oh right, because you’re a hopeless, unsightly, aspiring spinster.

Third is guilt: why did you drown your loneliness in that family-sized box of Godiva? Now you don’t have a prayer of finding a soulmate who will see your pure heart through your impending cellulite.

Fourth is anger: oh Jesus, it’s Valentine’s Day again, and you’re going to have to grin and bear the endless Hallmark movies and elusive restaurant availability.

Why couldn’t it be one of those things that only happens every four years like a leap year?

Finally, fifth is defeat: maybe you should just hide under your covers for the day. At least you won’t have to face the unbearable

sight of everyone’s love but yours.

Like the five stages of grief that psychiatrist Elizabeth Kubler-Ross so famously defined, the stages of Valentine’s Day disappointment only worsen as you progress through them. Let’s rectify this.

The holiday is supposed to be centered around love, remember?

Whether single, dating, in a relationship or married, there is only one person in our lives who

“Try treating yourself as if you were your own significant other.”

will provide us with unconditional love, and it tends to be the person we deprive of love the most: ourselves.

In our hyper-superficial world, it can feel like there are so many pressures we simply cannot satisfy on our own. We need someone to take our photos for us, so we can look like we have friends, not to mention people to populate our feeds. We need people to admire our aesthetic. We need people to watch our vlogs.

And our vision of our capacity is even further clouded by those we

profoundly depend on: our parents to show us love and, if we’re lucky, subsidize our expenses, our siblings to survive our parents, our friends to provide us with guidance and our romantic relationships for validation.

There’s an insurmountable quantity of need, and it’s easy to credit everyone else with their contributions while you just try to pull yourself through and beat yourself up for every misstep.

This Valentine’s Day, try treating yourself as if you were your own significant other. Celebrate all your favorite qualities and pour affection into those things about yourself that you would typically find annoying. Take yourself out to a nice meal. Allow yourself some treats. Pamper yourself.

Write yourself a love letter.

Think about all your best features.

You were bright enough to get yourself into a top university. You are doing well enough in your studies not to have failed yet. Simply being in college means you are working toward making a meaningful impact and improving the world, in whatever way resonates with you. You’re doing your best.

So challenge yourself to be your own Valentine this holiday.

And if nothing else, remember this: even Saint Valentine himself wasn’t exactly a heartthrob (and he was martyred).

Dana Munro is a sophomore majoring in musical theater. Glass Half Full runs every Tuesday.

End Valentine’s Day with a bang In case you didn’t know, V stands for Valentine. Or Vodka. Or Viagra. Or a potent combination of the three – whatever it takes to make it through the sexiest day of the year.

We’re expected to turn a random Wednesday into a romantic combination of horny and corny, complete with chocolates hastily bought from a CVS, premature, forced murmurs of “I love you” and an overpriced dinner at a crowded restaurant.

But it all comes down to the happy ending because sex after eating Cheesecake Factory shrimp scampi and heart-shaped congealed cocoa and dairy on a Wednesday is supposed to be extra special.

For some of us, the ending will be anything but happy. It will be bad.

Most people have had really sh**ty sex, and some of us keep going for random hookups to fulfill the need for attention and heavy petting. But why are we settling for these awful experiences on Valentine’s Day or any other day of the year?

It’s important to realize that people have sex for many different reasons – for fun, for pleasure, for passion or even for money (no shame, hustle).

You don’t need to be dripping

wet or rock hard to have sex, you might even just be doing it to make your partner happy when he or she is excruciatingly horny.

In fact, that kind of sex can be some of the most satisfying because you’re doing it out of love, intimacy and care for the other person. Even if it wasn’t ultimately super pleasurable for you, it’s still meaningful and rewarding. No, the warm fuzzy feeling inside is not from the semen you just swallowed.

That’s not the kind of sex we’re talking about when we talk about bad experiences. The sex we’re talking about is the kind that, although consensual, might bring tears to your eyes from embarrassment instead of a bone-rattling orgasm.

What makes this sex unsatisfying is not just the lack of physical pleasure, it’s the reason behind you wanting to have sex. You probably weren’t horrifically horny, since that can be satisfied by busting a nut or the lady version of busting a nut. You weren’t doing it for intimacy or out of love for your partner, and you weren’t doing it to get your day’s paycheck.

Bad sex comes from a place of insecurity and the resulting need for attention.

Maybe you had sex because your dry spell was drier than

Betty White’s vag, so you settled for one of the first takers.

Or maybe you had sex because you were feeling bad about your otherwise beautiful #DadBod and just wanted someone to use you for your body. There is something to be said about the feeling of being wanted.

When you have that kind of needy sex, it just ends up feeling like you masturbated with someone else’s body.

So this V-Day, remember it’s about quality, not quantity.

Before you get yourself into some sad sex, make sure you’re doing it for a reason that will leave you satisfied at the end.

Otherwise, you’re just wasting everyone’s time, including your own.

Ideally, we here at TMH wish you the hottest and horniest V-Day possible with a person you love. And that might just mean some quality ~alone~ time. Do you (maybe literally), and don’t lower your standards.

Editorials usually represent the majority view of The Miami Hurricane editorial staff. This week’s editorial was written by V, The Miami Hurricane’s sex columnist, but the staff endorses its message.

Have a question for V? Email dearv@themiamihurricane.com.

Miami has everything you need to make V-Day extra romantic, whether that means roller blading, a visit to an art museum or a picnic on the beach.

Catch a movie or a concert at Soundscape Park

Located in Miami Beach, this new outdoor space boasts a 7,000-square-foot projection wall to watch your favorite movie or see your favorite musician perform live. Pack a picnic for the day and lay a towel under the palm trees for an unforgettable Valentine’s Day experience.

Soundscape Park is located at 400 17th St., Miami Beach, Fla. 33139

Explore the Historic Vizcaya Museum and Gardens

Built in 1914 by businessman James Deering, Vizcaya offers a glimpse of Italian Renaissance style just a short drive from campus. This Valentine’s Day, enjoy a stroll through the lush, manicured gardens and a tour of the historic mansion. After a day of walking, have a seat outside and cool down with a scoop, or three, of ice cream from the Vizcaya Café and Shop.

Vizcaya Museum and Gardens is located at 3251 S Miami Ave., Miami, Fla. 33129

Plan an affordable beach picnic

For a date that won’t break the bank, have a picnic on the beach. On the shores of Crandon Park Beach in Key Biscayne, spread out a blanket under the palm trees and watch night fall over Miami. With a bottle of wine and a home-cooked meal, a beach picnic is a romantic way to end your Valentine’s Day. Crandon Park Beach is located at 6747 Crandon Blvd., Key Biscayne, Fla. 33149

Pick strawberries at Knaus Watch the sun set under Berry Farm Rickenbacker Causeway If you don’t mind the drive to Homestead, Knaus Berry Farm is the perfect place to spend your Valentine’s Day. Enjoy an afternoon of picking strawberries and eating fruit pies under the warm Florida sun. Before you leave, make sure to taste the famous Knaus Berry Farm cinnamon rolls, which, with their delicious cinnamon-sugar glaze, will leave you smiling for the rest of the day.

Knaus Berry Farms is located at 15980 SW 248th St., Homestead, Fla. 33031

Skate the day away at Super Wheels Miami

For a fun and quirky date, visit one of the only indoor roller skating facilities in Miami, where you can skate all day and night to old-school jams or the latest hits.

Make sure to take a break from skating to play arcade games or grab a slice of pizza from the snack bar for the full experience.

Super Wheels Miami is located at 12265 SW 112th St., Miami, Fla. 33186

Spend the afternoon at Wynwood Yard

This Valentine’s Day, enjoy the scheduled events at Wynwood Yard.

From the Right on Target cooking classes by chef Julie Frans to yoga with Andrew or DIY Crafts for Self-Love with Essential Oils, Wynwood Yard offers a variety of fun activities. After these events, take a short walk to The Salty Donut for delicious, handmade doughnuts. The shop offers an assortment of unique flavors to satisfy Valentine’s Day cravings, including maple bacon to Nutella.

The Wynwood Yard is located at 56 NW 29th St., Miami, Fla. 33127

If you’re slightly more adventurous, take a drive to the Rickenbacker Causeway. Instead of crossing it into Key Biscayne, pull off underneath the bridge.

For an inexpensive yet romantic end to your night, bring a bottle of champagne and watch the sun set in shades of red, orange and gold over the Miami skyline.

Explore the art world at Pérez Art Museum Miami At Pérez Art Museum Miami, commonly known as PAMM, explore the variety of 20th century and contemporary artwork from world-renowned artists.

After viewing the exhibits, relax and enjoy a romantic meal at the waterfront café, Verde, which offers views of Biscayne Bay. The Pérez Art Museum Miami is located at 1103 Biscayne Blvd., Miami, Fla. 33132

Take a painting class at Color Me Mine

Walk around The Shops at Sunset Place, where you can take a class at the world’s leading pottery studio chain.

At Color Me Mine, you can channel your inner artist and enjoy an afternoon painting pottery pieces with your sweetheart.

Color Me Mine is located at 5701 Sunset Dr., Miami, Fla. 33143

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Photo Courtesy SpectrUM

Queens and one king to reign Drag Out 2018

By Anika Bhavnani Contributing Edge Writer

Flashy talent, a rowdy crowd and glitzy gowns. What more could you want on a Thursday night? Join SpectrUM and host, iconic drag queen Tiffany Fantasia, Feb. 15 for DragOut 2018.

Staff and faculty will compete for the fifth year in a row in the charity fundraiser hosted by SpectrUM, UM’s LBGTQ student organization. Drag queen Tiffany Fantasia will emcee the event, which will feature student performers, professional drag queens from throughout Florida and, for the first time, a drag king.

South Florida’s Spikey Van Dykey, a renowned show director and drag king, will take his sixteen years of experience to the DragOut 2018 stage.

Throughout his career, Spikey has toured the Southeast with burlesque and vaudeville troupes, amassing crowds of up to 3,000. Since 2006, he has directed “Spikey and the After Midnites,” a variety show that includes everything from “fire performance” to “boylesque.”

This time, though, you won’t need to purchase tickets if you want to see Spikey. Since DragOut 2018 is free for all students, staff and faculty, attendees are encouraged to tip. That’s right – get ready to throw some singles. It’s for a

good cause.

SpectrUM partnered with The Alliance for GLBTQ Youth, a nonprofit organization in Miami, for this charitable event. All donations and tips to student performers will go toward the organization’s goal of providing resources to the local LGBTQ community and helping combat LGBTQ youth homelessness in Miami-Dade County.

Along with the famous Spikey, some of Miami’s best professional queens will sing, lip-sync and storm the stage during the competition. Don’t let that discourage you from joining in on the fun, though. Anyone can apply to perform in DragOut 2018, according to

the Facebook invite.

“Kings, Queens and Non-binary Beings are welcome to perform!” reads the invitation.

“I like the adrenaline rush of being on stage,” said sophomore Paul Schulz, a drag amateur performing in the competition. “And after watching ‘Rupaul’s Drag Race’ for the first time last year, I knew I had to do it.”

It takes a team of supportive artists and stylists, as well as one enthusiastic performer, to make a queen. A group of Schulz’s friends have been instrumental in his choreography, makeup and costume design. Schulz, with his bold personality and confidence in his performance, certainly has those

crucial factors.

“I am not nervous, rather eager to give the audience a performance that I would love to enjoy myself,” he said.

All competitors will be judged by a panel of UM faculty and staff, but the audience is welcome to get loud, throw cash and applaud favorite performers. The winner will receive a $150 Rathskeller gift card.

If you want to be wooed and wowed by Miami’s best kings and queens, come to DragOut at 8 p.m.

Feb. 15 in the Shalala Student Center Grand Ballroom.

For more information, check the SpectrUM Facebook page at @ MiamiSpectrUM.

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Body-positive swimsuit campaign makes its way to campus

By Haley Walker Edge Editor edge@themiamihurricane.com

Instead of succumbing to diet culture this spring break, embrace your body with one of ISHINE365’s self-love-promoting swimsuits. Students in Project HEAL Miami have partnered with ISHINE365 to bring the swimsuits to campus Feb. 14.

Project HEAL is a nonprofit organization with the goal of f u nd i ng i n-pat ie nt t reat me nt for those struggling with eating disorders and promoting the idea that f ull recover y is possible.

The organization has chapters t h r ou g hout Nor t h A me r ic a, including U M chapter Project HEAL Miami.

Senior Danielle Lowe, chapter president and music therapy major, said she got involved with Project H EA L af ter st r ug g l i ng w it h

an eating disorder and seeking treatment.

“My life completely changed when I went to treatment and entered recovery,” Lowe said. “After taking time off of school and really getting the most extensive care someone could dream of, while also realizing I was one of the very few that had access to this experience, I realized I had to do something about it.”

Some t i me s, less for t unate patients have to leave treatment before they are ready, and some can’t afford to go at all.

“Everyone deserves a chance at l i fe w it hout t hei r eat i ng disorder,” Lowe said. “Access to

care and support should not be a question, concern or privilege, but an unwavering guarantee.”

As for Project HEAL Miami’s par t nership wit h ISH I N E365 and its sister company, Two Piece Mafia, Lowe said it happened by chance.

you can’t sleep, scroll through Instagram,” she said. “I contacted them explaining what Project HEAL was about, and ISHINE365 was in.”

The company happened to be hosting a weeklong warehouse sale in South Miami. It invited Project HEAL Miami to table at its store and agreed to donate a portion of the week’s sales to Proje c t H E A L’s national treatment grant fund.

Lowe and three other members of the Miami chapter attended the warehouse sale on Feb. 4, where they provided information to shoppers about Project HEAL and wrote positive

“Everyone deserves a chance at life without their eating disorder.”

DANIELLE LOWE “I noticed these great bathing suits one night when I couldn’t sleep and was doing the thing they always tell you not to do when

body image affirmations on the dressing room mirrors for shoppers to read.

After the successf ul wa rehou se sa le, I SH I N E365 decided to co-host a “flea market” sale and donation booth from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Feb. 14 on the Foote Green. The company will accept gently-used clothes that donors have negative associations with, such as clothes that are too small and make them feel bad about themselves or motivate them toward unhealthy weight loss.

T hese clot hes w i l l be resold to benef it ISH I N E365 and Project HEAL’s charitable goals. ISHINE365 will also be selling its signature “love. your. body.” swimsuits at a special UM discount.

Follow @ProjectHEAL and @ISHINE365 on social media for more information, or visit their websites at theprojectheal.org and ishine365.com.

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94

A record number of Canes alumni came back to UM to participate in the celebration.

BASEBALL

Hunter Crenian // Visuals Editor FOREVER FAMILY: Canes baseball alumni gather to capture the moment after the Alumni Game Feb. 10 at Mark Light Field. A record 94 alumni returned to UM and were honored in a pregame celebration.

Miami opens season with FanFest, Alumni Game

By Maxwell Trink & Brennan Prusak Contributing Sports Writers @MaxwellTrink

Miami Hurricanes fans got a taste of what the 2018 season has in store at the annual FanFest and Alumni Game Feb. 10 at Mark Light Field. The Canes beat the alumni team 2-0.

In its final tuneup before the regular season, Miami’s pitching staff shut down a lineup featuring minor leaguers David Thompson, Carl Chester, Dale Carey and former 13-year MLB veteran Aubrey Huff.

Sophomore right-handed

pitcher Evan McKendry pitched five scoreless innings, striking out five and allowing six hits.

Junior infielder/outfielder Romy Gonzalez opened the scoring for Miami with an RBI-double in the first inning, while freshman outfielder Tony Jenkins drove in the other run with an RBI-double in the fifth inning.

Before the game, fans got the opportunity to meet the players and coaching staff, take pictures with the Miami Maniac mascot and grab a Mark Light milkshake – a local favorite.

FanFest was also a chance for UM to honor 94 alumni, who were all recognized during pregame

ceremonies.

Larry Adams, the oldest alumni present at age 90, played for the Hurricanes in 1948-49.

“All these guys are pretty old, and they ask me, ‘When are you going to come down with the flu or something and not come,’” Adams said. “I said, ‘Well, I’m healthy, and I want to be here and I want to root for the Hurricanes.’”

For many families, FanFest has become an annual tradition.

“My favorite thing is that I get to see all the players,” said 9-yearold Nick Diaz, who has attended the event three years in a row. “I also like the alumni team because I know some of the players who

graduated and are in the minor leagues.”

Diaz’s father, Sergio, talked about Jim Morris’ last Alumni Game as head coach of the Hurricanes.

“He is a legend,” Sergio Diaz said. “We are definitely going to miss him, but his retirement is well deserved.”

The event brought a record number of alumni back to Mark Light to honor Morris, who is entering his 25th and final season at Miami.

“It’s first class,” 1999-2001 UM outfielder Marcus Nettles said.

“If it wasn’t his last season, I’m not sure I would have come back

tonight. But I couldn’t miss it.”

For many former Hurricanes, coming back to play one more time in an orange and green jersey was a one-of-a-kind experience.

“It’s all about the tradition for me,” 2002-2005 UM pitcher Brandon Camardese said. “Being welcomed back like this is amazing, and being able to bring my son here to see it for the first time is everything.”

With the offseason in the books, fans are ready for a bounceback 2018 campaign.

Miami opens its season against Rutgers 7 p.m. Feb. 16 at Mark Light Field.

TENNIS

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Canes tennis goes 2-0 in doubleheader

By Isaiah Kim-Martinez Sports Editor sports@themiamihurricane.com @isaiah_km

Miami stayed perfect on its home court with back-to-back victories Feb. 11 in a doubleheader against Florida Atlantic and Bucknell at the Neil Schiff Tennis Center.

The Hurricanes have won fourstraight games, bringing them to a record of 5-2.

Against FAU, the tag teams of Pablo Aycart and Nile Clark and Christian Langmo and Dane Dunlap both picked up wins in doubles competition, and then Langmo, Adria Soriano and Bojan Jankulovski recorded individual victories to give Miami the 4-2 match win. “We beat a good team today,�

head coach Aljosa Piric said of FAU. “They train and compete in the same conditions that we do and they were ready for the heat. I’m very proud of our guys and the fight they have shown the entire year.�

UM dominated Bucknell from start to finish later that day, posting a 7-0 win.

The Canes kept their momentum going into doubles play, winning that point for the sixth-straight match.

Then Miami captured two-set wins in six singles matches. “It’s tough to come back and play two matches in a day, especially on a hot day like this, but our guys showed up and took care of business, one through six, and that’s all we can ask for,� Piric said. “We are going to give the guys a couple of days off, then it’s back to work.�

Hunter Crenian // Visuals Editor OVERHEAD SMASH: 6-foot-3 senior Christian Langmo goes for the serve against Florida Atlantic in a 4-2 Miami victory Feb. 11 at the Neil Schiff Tennis Center.

Member Organizations Ƨƪƴ ƧƜĭ ƨďƴ ƎƜ ƯƚƧ ĭƊď ƴ.$ ƴƎĭ ƜƧƪ ƜƧư Ɯĭƪ Ɯƚ =%7 The Interfraternity Council is the advisory, supervisory, and governing body of all the NIC and other national governing councils member fraternities at the University of Miami. It shall strive for positive public relations between the individual fraternities, the Greek community, and the University. It shall promote scholarship among its members and uphold the standards and regulations of the University of Miami . It shall promote the interests of its members and the University to the end that the conditions of the fraternities and their relations with the University may be improved. Learn more about IFC and how to become a member at Miami.edu/GreekLife.

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ATHLETICS

Women’s athletics building champions

By Isaiah Kim-Martinez Sports Editor sports@themiamihurricane.com

The Canes laced up their bright pink sneakers and tucked in their black-and-pink jerseys.

The crowd buzzed.

The Miami women’s basketball team was just minutes away from facing rival Florida State, but this particular Sunday afternoon was more than just a game.

UM was taking part in its fourth Celebration of Women’s Athletics event, honoring student-athletes from each of Miami’s nine women’s programs and alumnae who helped pave the way for their success.

And during the celebratory luncheon before the game, Miami athletics announced the launching of the Building Women Champions campaign, “an initiative that will enhance scholarship support, leadership development and career coaching for Hurricane female studentathletes.”

Through the program, the Women’s Athletics Leadership Council will solicit donations, provide mentors for and grant scholarships to student-athletes.

For many in attendance Feb. 11 at the Watsco Center, the initiative represented immense progress – not only at the university but in the world as well.

“We may be one of the first in the country to make that kind of commitment,” former University of Miami President Donna Shalala said. “So the celebration today, and the announcement of the new campaign, is important not only for young women but also for young men … It’s important for all of us that there are woman leaders in this country.”

The University of Miami has a historic legacy of supporting women in athletics.

In 1973, UM offered the first ever Division I women’s athletic

Hunter Crenian // Visuals Editor AIMING FOR GREATNESS: Hilarie Bass, the newly appointed president of the American Bar Association and vice chair of the UM Board of Trustees, watches Miami play Florida State Feb. 11 at the Watsco Center. Bass said people often don’t realize the greatness of women’s athletics.

scholarship in the country to a tennis player.

Miami has come a long way, but the journey isn’t over yet.

“Today was really a celebration of their accomplishments – what they’ve done and where they’re going,” Director of Athletics Blake James said. “We want to have them earn their degree, play the sport they love and have that opportunity to go on and do whatever it is they want to do in life.”

Men’s sporting events typically have higher attendance than women’s, despite the same level of competition.

Hilarie Bass, the newly appointed president of the

American Bar Association and vice chair of the UM Board of Trustees, said the event wasn’t just about celebrating athletics but also about promoting the incredible athletes at UM. “It is just a real great opportunity to get the community behind women’s athletics because a lot of times people don’t realize how many great woman athletes we have,” Bass said. “Anybody who comes to an event like this is in awe of these women because they realize their schedules are just as tough as the men’s basketball players or the men’s baseball players.”

The Building Women Champions campaign aims to

prepare student-athletes for life beyond UM and provide skills for continued success in the future.

More than 94 percent of female executives played sports, and half of them played at the college level, according to an email from Shalala and Bass.

“You get enormous discipline and focus from sports, and those are two important characteristics for leaders,” Shalala said.

UM women’s basketball coach Katie Meier has used her platform to support the growth of Miami’s players.

Deputy Director of Athletics Jennifer Strawley said Meier is more than just a basketball coach, she is also a passionate

leader who shows that sports can be used as a mechanism to educate.

“Athletics, and the opportunities we provide through athletics, teaches the lessons and skills for women to go on and be successful,” Strawley said.

“Empowerment, resilience – all these wonderful traits just help build leaders.”

And for Shalala, her goals for Miami don’t stop there.

“We have only one step for women’s athletics: we want to win national championships,” she said. “We are not interested in just being competitive. Our future is unlimited.”

THE MIAMI HURRICANE

February 13, 2018 - February 19 , 2018

HAPPY VALENTINE’S LOVE, DAY Illustrations by Grace Wehniainen

EXTRAS

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THE MIAMI HURRICANE

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SPOR TS F E S T 2 0 1 8 C H AMPI ON S and a job well done to the more than 1,900 students on 58 teams who played in this year’s event!

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