The Alphabet by Michelle Tam

I have no idea what Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m doing but I like to draw so here goes

A study of letterforms and finding creativity through the misadventures of unemployment

A HAND LETTERING AND ILLUSTRATION PROJECT BY MICHELLE TAM

Hello, thanks for picking this book up! This alphabet project started during a period of uncertainty and instability. I graduated a semester early from college in December of 2017. For a few months, I was unemployed, feeling uninspired and discouraged from the stressful process that is job hunting. I had lost a sense of structure that I had relied on for almost my entire life to keep me motivated. To keep myself creating, I assigned myself a simple project: to hand letter/illustrate a different letter of the alphabet for 27 days (to include the ampersand). This was an easy way to remind myself to consistently flex my creative muscles and look at the letterforms in a different way. Here is my compilation of my alphabet along with short, very personal lessons I have learned in my twenty one years of being that I hope you might be able to relate to!

Michelle

DAY 1 - A A is for ADVERTISING

t the University of Illinois, I was an Advertising major. I thought it was the perfect combination of what I thought was interesting: Art and Psychology. I thought it was so cool how brands could create unique experiences and campaigns for consumers, changing how people interacted with and thought about the brand. However, as time and classes wore on and I learned more about the detrimental effects of consumerism, especially on the environment, I started to take on a more minimalist lifestyle. As much as I enjoyed my major in school, I dislike how it creates insecurities among consumers and pushes them to buy, buy, buy. This qualm about what I studied has pushed me to pursue graphic design and art instead of advertising.

DAY 2 - B B is for BOOKS

e all know we should be reading more. But it is SO hard now that we have Netflix and Fortnite and YouTube. After I graduated and 2018 began, one of my goals was to read more. Half Price Books was one of my favorite places to go when I was bored on a weekday. With my new minimalist mindset, I sold boxes of old books from my house, ranging from my dad’s old college textbooks to Captain Underpants and used that money to buy new ones. It’s taking me a long time to get through them since it’s just so easy to spend money on best sellers, but my favorites so far have been Memoirs of a Geisha, The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, and a book about typefaces called Just My Type. I’m looking forward to reading Trevor Noah’s memoir, Kite Runner, and The Time Traveler’s Wife. Slowly but surely, I will get through them all.

DAY 3 - C C is for COFFEE CHATS

s a Creative, my creativity comes in waves. Sometimes, I am so inspired and can’t wait to make things. Other times, I feel like I’m stuck in a pit. I will never create something beautiful ever again. What’s the point. Thankfully, old friends reach out and ask me to get coffee (I’m a tea person, actually). It’s been a while so we catch each other up on each other’s lives, and I realize how distant we are from each other, even though we update our social media all the time. They offer fresh new perspectives, give you encouragement in different forms and tell you about their passion projects. I love my old, close friends, but there’s something so refreshing about meeting up with someone who you haven’t talked to in a long time. These coffee chats give me a surge of creativity and a new will to make beautiful things.

DAY 4 - D D is for DANCE

rowing up, dance was my entire life. Since I was six years old, I did ballet, jazz, contemporary and hip-hop. Jazz was my favorite. I competed all over the Bay Area, went to conventions and even participated in a dance pageant (I am not the pageant type at all). My friends knew that if I wasn’t at home, I was probably at the studio. “I can’t, I have dance.” As I grew older and got more advanced, I realized I only loved dancing within my studio, where I was considered one of the best. It was comfortable, knowing I’d always been put front and center. But outside of the studio, I was nowhere near the top. Dancing outside of my comfort zone scared me and after I went to college, I almost competely ceased dancing. When I think about it, I feel sad since it was such a big part of my life. I regret it, but it taught me that I can’t stay stagnant just because I am comfortable.

DAY 5 - E E is for ERIC

ric and I met in third grade in Mrs. Andrade’s class. From then, I had a crush on him until fifth grade. In sixth grade, we apparently ended up “dating” for a little while before I “broke up” with him and starting dating another boy in our class. I moved pretty fast in elementary school... haha. For years after that, we didn’t really speak. Fast forward to senior year of high school, I rediscovered his handsomeness through being his cotillion court dance partner for our good friend Kris. I pulled the ol’ “tell all my friends and his friends to ask me to Homecoming” move and somehow it worked. Our first date was after the Homecoming dance at Wendy’s. I watched him scarf down two chicken sandwiches and we talked for hours. Then I forgot my phone in his car. And now it’s been over four and a half years and I can’t imagine being with anyone else ever. Thanks for everything, Eric.

DAY 6 - F F is for FEAR

alling is something I am terrified of. The feeling of falling makes my stomach somersault and is really one of the most uncomfortable sensations for me. When I was a kid, I pretended to enjoy roller coasters because I thought that was cool. And because if I lied enough, I could actually make myself like them. My friends like to find rocks to jump from. The fall isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t far, only about 15-20 feet and it lasts maybe a fraction of a second. But it absolutely TERRIFIES me. I still do it though. Peer pressure. But I need at least 10 minutes of mental preparation before I take the leap. But... I plan on sky diving before I die. Even though the idea of it terrifies me to my core, I feel like it is something I absolutely have to do before my time on this earth ends. It will be the ultimate test of grit and bravery. If I can overcome my fear of falling and succesfully sky dive, I can do absolutely ANYTHING. At least, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m convinced.

DAY 7 - G G is for GYM

ow since I stopped dancing, I had to find another way to keep myself active: lifting! I’m not serious enough to compete in powerlifting competitions or even go to the gym everyday, but it is one of my favorite ways, after doodling, to clear my mind. I started from going on the elliptical while watching Netflix on an iPad and went to bench pressing, squatting and deadlifting. My numbers are nothing to be crazy proud of, but I am the strongest I have ever been. I’m especially proud of how strong my arms are getting. I may not look too different, but I can feel it. And that’s what matters. I encourage girls and women to lift! The excuse of “I don’t want to look bulky” is absolutely NOT a plausible reason. It’s not hard to find someone to teach you how to work your way around the gym, so get out there and get lifting!

DAY 8 - H H is for HONG KONG

ong Kong is where my parents grew up and immigrated from. The majority of my extended family are still there and my and my parents visit at least once a year. My feelings toward Hong Kong are mixed since I go back so often and only for family. I don’t get to do a lot of exploring or visiting tourist spots. It’s disappointing because I know the city of 7 million people has so much to offer but I don’t get to experience much outside of visiting distant relatives and eating dim sum. In recent years, I would dread going back. I feel selfish and ungrateful since all of my family is back there, so I’m trying to work on those feelings. Despite that, the Motherland (as I like to call it) will always be a special place to me.

DAY 9 - I I is for ILLINOIS

-L-L! I-N-I! Going across the country to the Midwest, a region Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d never stepped foot in before, for college was the biggest step outside of my comfort zone. I always thought I would stay in California with the palm trees, mountains and sunshine. But when the decision came around, I decided I wanted to move somewhere else and experience a different part of the country for a little bit. Though the beginning was rough, I learned to develop Illini pride and found my niche. I have found more lifelong friends and done things I never thought I would do, like dance in a barn, for example. I recommend going out of state for college for anyone, if itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s possible. When else are you going to get to experience a completely different place for a couple of years?

DAY 10 - J J is for JOURNALS

can’t stress how nice it is to have a physical journal at my sides at all times to jot down my thoughts, doodles and notes at any time of the day. I started journaling and doodling when I was really young and I can’t tell you how thankful I am that young me did that! Life moves FAST and it is really nice to be able to reflect on past emotions and experiences, seeing how you’ve changed and grown. Maybe I’m just a person who especially likes to hold on to memorabilia, but this is supposed to be a great way to improve creativity. I highly recommend it!

DAY 11 - K K is for KAREN AND TIFF

oint shout out here. I have friends in college who want nothing to do with the people from their high schools. Oh man. Can’t relate. I am really lucky to have these two girls, Karen and Tiffany, in my life, by my side, since seventh grade. I know our friendship fluctuated a bit through junior high and high school, but in the end, right here right now, I’m so glad to have you guys as my rocks and my go-tos. When we were all in college at the same time, it was hard to keep up with each other since we were all so busy, but whenever there was break, we’d be back together like nothing had changed. Whenever I think back to high school, I only have positive memories thanks to you guys. To this day we still can’t stop reminscing about simpler times, when AP’s, SAT’s and benchmark projects were our biggest problems. And when ASB and Homecoming were where we thrived.

DAY 12 - L L is for (SELF) LOVE

t’s a journey that I know a lot of people go through. Learning to love yourself and your body isn’t easy, but it is so valuable. The main parts of my physical appearance that I struggled with were my acne, weight, and hairy legs. It took years, but my acne has mostly cleared up through seeing dermatologists and buying many medical products (I’m pretty lucky that it’s not as big of a problem anymore). I’ve learned to really not give a flying f about hair on my legs, partly because I’m lazy and partly because it is a completely natural part of all bodies and there is nothing to be ashamed about. My weight was more difficult to accept because my parents have been calling me “fat” literally since birth. My extended family love to comment on my weight as well whenever I visit them in Hong Kong. These hurtful, horrible comments made me believe I wasn’t good enough. All my life I was told I should be ten pounds lighter. Despite this, I’m now proud of what I see when I look in the mirror. Not everything is about the number on the scale. Please don’t let others project their body insecurities on you!

DAY 13 - M M is for ME, MICHELLE

ave I not introduced myself yet? As Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m writing this, I have no idea where these books will land, but it might be good for me to say a few things about me. I was born and raised in the San Francisco Bay Area. I doodle and draw all the timend I have a million thoughts in my head 24/7. I am extroverted and love being the center of attention. I like being loud and dramatic and making people laugh. I am not very fashionable (but Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m working on it) and am working on leading a more minimalist lifestyle, but I love collecting things like postcards and stickers and pens. On weekends, I like to sleep in until the afternoons. I love my dog named Percy. I am terrified of needles but hope to get a tattoo someday. I hate asparagus and celery and bean sprouts. I love pasta and chocolate and bread.

DAY 14 - N N is for NO

his is a common problem, but one of my weaknesses is being able to say “no” to tasks and favors that I’m incapable of or simply just don’t want to do. I often spread myself too thin or end up doing things I hate just because I am doing my best to please people. This is bogus because I encourage people to say no for their wellbeing all the time. Often times, in my head I’m screaming to myself “NO MICHELLE NO, DON’T DO IT” and I hear “Yeah, sure, no problem” coming out of my mouth. I don’t owe anything to most of the people who ask things of me. It’s still a work in progress.

DAY 15 - O O is for THE OFFICE

he Office is hands down my favorite show of all time. I watch it before bed, while booking, when I’m doodling... basically any time! I have rewatched seasons 3-7 (seasons 1 and 2 are painful to watch and the show isn’t the same once Michael leaves) more times than I can count and will never pass up a chance to make a reference. I have watched every blooper and deleted scene that exists on YouTube. My favorite episodes are “Dinner Party”, “Fun Run”, and both “Niagara: Part 1” and “Part 2”. The show is an absolute gem and I will watch it until I die, probably.

DAY 16 - P P is for PESCATARIAN

started the pescatarian diet (no meat except for seafood) after Thanksgiving of 2017 for environmental reasons. The meat industry takes a huge toll on the environment, from the huge amounts of water that is used to the inhumane treatment of farm animals. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not here to tell anyone what to eat, but even going meatless for one day a week is healthier and can lower your carbon footprint. Not gonna lie, I miss chicken a lot, and I do break my diet once in a while (I love pho way too much) but I believe what Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m doing, though small, can make a difference.

DAY 17 - Q Q is for QUEEN

love listening to podcasts, especially while Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m working on design work and commuting. This year, I discovered my favorite podcast, Two Dope Queens, with hosts Jessica Williams and Phoebe Robinson who are serving up some serious black girl magic! The relationship and banter between the two queens are hilarious and they bring on up-and-coming comics who are usually people of color, women, and part of the LGBTQ+ community. They touch on topics of intersectionality, sex, race and pop culture in a way that is refreshing and unmatched in hilarity. The podcast has turned into an HBO special, but most episodes are still online. Each episode never fails to make me laugh out loud.

DAY 18 - R R is for RAIN

ain is the worst. I can’t stand wet and gloomy days. I LIVE for sunshine and warmth. Bad weather makes me unproductive, sluggish, and unmotivated. Or at least that’s what I tell myself. It’s something I need to work on because there’s literally no way to control the weather, and I can’t always excuse myself from being productive just because it’s gray outside. In my few months of unemployment in the winter, rainy days were the hardest for me to wake up and get started with my day. They were my ultimate lows, but I’m determined now not to let unpredictable weather control my moods.

DAY 19 - S S is for STICKERS

lmost everything important to me covered in stickers. My laptop, waterbottle, notebooks... everything of mine needs to be customized so the world knows itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s MINE. Fueled by my love of stickers, I started a sticker business in my last semester of college. Taking advantage of the amazing Art and Design print lab, I printed hundreds of stickers of my own design and sold them for a dollar each. I was excited to be a business woman, but I had no real business plan. Printing and laying out designs took hours at a time, and meeting up with people across campus just to hand off some stickers took a toll on my schedule. It was fun at times, but in the end I believe I undersold myself. Lesson learned, but the journey to become the Ultimate Sticker Queen continues.

DAY 20 - T T is for THRIFTING

â&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not one of those people can easily find things at thrift stores and I envy those who can. However, I am going to make a more dedicated effort to make thrifting an essential part of my closet. After watching the documentary The True Cost and seeing the horrible effects of the textile industry and fast fashion on the environment and peoplesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; lives, I vowed to not shop at huge brands like Forever21, H&M and Zara. Be mindful of where your clothes come from. Buy second hand clothing, swap with your friends, reuse and upcycle your old clothes instead of throwing them out. Remember that most of your clothes have been touched by human hands in countries like Cambodia and Bangladesh.

DAY 21 - U U is for UNOFFICIAL

nother entrepreneurial endeavor of mine was selling “Unofficial” shirts. There is a day during the spring semester at the University of Illinois that is dubbed “Unofficial St. Patrick’s Day.” Essentially, it’s a day when student wake up at 6 a.m. and drink all day. The first time my friends and I tried selling shirts of my own design for the holiday, we were issued a trademark infringement notice. Apparently the holiday is trademarked! We hadn’t done our research and weren’t careful enough. We tried again a year later and received orders and I really thought it was going to go successfully... Until our t-shirt vendor fell through and we ended up refunding people for more than half of the shirts. It was a stressful fiasco, but again, a learning experience. I’m still not giving up on my pursuits of being entrepreneurial.

DAY 22 - V V is for VICKY

icky and I danced together in our high school’s Hip Hop Club when I was a freshman and sophomore. After not seeing her for around six years, except for following her on social media, she reached out to me about helping her with several projects. Catching up with Vicky was refreshing and inspiring. From seeing her Instagram and Facebook posts, I knew she had been doing well, but talking to her again after so many years showed me what a wise and driven self starter she is. She has a way with words and with connecting to people. She is supportive, empathetic and efficient. I’m currently helping her self publish her first book of poetry and I’m so excited to see where our partnership will go. Thank you so much for the opportunities you’ve given me, Vicky! Putting together this book was also her idea. Vicky’s website: victoriadnguyen.com Vicky’s instagram: @vickynuuwin

DAY 23 - W W is for WATERMELON

love watermelon. Watermelon means summer and sunshine. It means having family and friends over for barbeques. It means happiness. Summer is my season of choice. If it could be summer year round, I wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t complain at all. Bay Area summer weather, I mean, not Midwest summers. The trick to choosing the best watermelon: Look for a consistent, dark green exterior. Look for imperfections and little scratches (it means bugs have been attracted to it). Look for a large deep yellow spot on the bottom. Trust me, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve never chosen a bad watermelon.

DAY 24 - X X is for VIEUX CARRÃ&#x2030;

eah yeah, I know, Vieux Carré starts with a V, but it has an X. The Vieux Carré is also known as The French Quarter, the iconic central section of New Orleans. The colors making up this X were inspired by Mardi Gras colors. I was blown away by the art and history and culture that is so prominent in New Orleans. The city was unlike any other place I’d ever visited. I really recommend visiting, and if you do, booking a swamp tour, visiting a bar on Frenchmen St. (and visiting the Frenchmen Art Market while you’re there) and stuffing your face with as many beignets as you can.

DAY 25 - Y Y is for YOUR WORTH

now your worth. Then add tax. This was something I learned through starting to freelance. As a junior designer who had just come out of school, I charged dirt cheap for illustration and graphic design services, barely justifying it by telling myself I was charging 15-20 an hour. I enjoyed freelance but soon realized that if I wanted to freelance full time, I would be homeless in the blink of an eye. I soon learned that charging clients based on a certain amount per hour is not efficient at all. Freelance works by a value-based approach. “I am not a collection of hours. I am the accumulation of all my skills and talents. I am wisdom and creativity” (from an article I read called “Breaking the Time Barrier”). Clients care about the value we create for them and that is what we should be asking them to pay for. You and your time are worth so much more. Understanding that there was unique value and expertise to my work was something that took me several underpaid projects to realize.

DAY 26 - &

brief lesson on the history and origin of the ampersand, a truly beautiful logogram. It originated from the ligature of the letters e and t, “et” meaning “and” in Latin. The ligature was often added to the end of the alphabet as the 27th letter. It would be recited as “and per se and,” which would later be shortened to “ampersand.” I love looking at how different the ampersands are from varying typefaces. One of my favorites is the Bodoni Bold ampersand:

DAY 27 - Z Z is for zzz

ike anyone else, I love my sleep. But my body is so bad at it.

It’s really hard for me to fall asleep because for some reason, right before I need to go to bed is when my brain decides it needs to be most active. A million thoughts run through my head. That one embarassing moment. That one person who rubbed me the wrong way. Ideas for videos I will likely never make. Ideas for my next art piece. That one trailer for a horror movie. Oh god I’m not sleeping for a while now. And even when I eventually fall asleep, I am an incredibly light sleeper. I’ve tried melatonin, lavender oil, counting sheep... I will always be jealous of those who can fall asleep right when their heads hit the pillow.

All letters were done in Adobe Draw on a 9.7 in iPad Pro with an Apple Pencil

FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM

@mtamdoesart CATCH UP WITH MY WORK AT