Sassy February 2013

FEBRUARY 2013

NO10

tammy

HaMMER

Valentine's Night IN! The Big Business

of Love

Coffee: Staying Hot in a Cold Economy Carpal Tunnel

My ths

Spa-Like Splurge for

Less

Overcoming

Envy

EMERGENCY 2013 DEPARTMENT

GRAND OPENING

Come and Celebrate with Us! Lakeland Community Hospital, Niles Emergency Department

Wednesday, February 27 2:00 to 7:00 p.m.

Trust Your Heart to Us

Lakeland Community Hospital, Niles is accredited by the Society of Chest Pain Centers

We are opening our new Emergency Department Our Emergency Department has expanded to 18 exam rooms, each with its own telephone and flat screen television. Lakeland HealthCare professionals will be on hand to share the unique features of the 9,000-square-foot expansion.

• Register to win door prizes • Take a tour and enjoy refreshments • Visit the Lakeland Expo! Learn about Lakeland services and programs to keep you and your family well Located at the corner of 31 N. St. Joseph Avenue and Grant Street, just west of the St. Joseph River

www.lakelandhealth.org/niles

Lakeland is proud to have earned the Gold Seal of ApprovalTM for Primary Stroke Centers from The Joint Commission. This distinction recognizes centers that make exceptional efforts to foster better outcomes for stroke care

/ contents

COVER

MODEL: Tammy Hammer Bling: Mint Bubble Necklace from Jules Boutique, Goshen Photography: CLASSIC IMAGE Photography Stylist: Maria Gonzalez

ON THE

FEBRUARY

EVERY MONTH 04 Letter from the publisher 05 Contributors, Letter from the editor STUFF WE LOVE 06 Sassy Time 08 Blush & Bashful SASSY SKIN & MAKE-UP 10 Spa-Like Splurge While Spending Less

By Jennifer Warfel Juszkiewicz

SASSY FASHION 12 Yeah, Butt…

By Kathy Friend

SASSY ADVICE FROM A BUSINESS COACH 14 dear charrise...

Answers from Charrise McCrorey

HEALTHY LIVING 16 5 Myths about Carpal Tunnel Syndrome

By A. J. Mencias, M.D.

18

New Questions for your OB/GYN

By Carlos Bolden, M.D.

sassy DESIGN 20 Planning a Valentine’s Night IN

By Andrew Skipper

sassy art 22 Finding Women Artists

By Cheryl K. Snay

24

Getting Into the Mix

By Stephanie J. Salisbury

KitchenAid and Local Artist Dean Loucks Collaborate

adventures in sassydom 26 Gel Nails & Other Salon Horrors

By Jane Suter

SASSY BUSINESS FEATURES 30 The Big Business of Love

By Scott Tingwald

32

Staying Hot in a Cold Economy

34

Winning on the Web

36

Silencing the Green-Eyed Monster

By Meagan Francis

By Noelle Elliott

By Jennifer Warfel Juszkiewicz

7 Ways to Squelch Envy

sassy connections 38 Too Married to Date!

By Jane Suter

Sassy life 40 Fight the Urge… to Shop!

Photography: CLASSIC IMAGE PHOTOGRAPHY

By Jennifer Warfel Juszkiewicz

42

Technology Overboard

Winter Driving: Don’t be a Jerk!

By Noelle Elliott

By Amberly Nichols

THE DATEBOOK 48 Sassy events to put in your datebook SCENE & BE SEEN 50 Read about events around town SASSY | FEBRUARY 2013

3

LETTER FROM THE

publisher

Photography: Classic image photography Makeup: Camellia Maalouf, Camellia Cosmetics Granger

Publisher & Editor-in-Chief: Betsy Tavernier Betsy@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com

EXECUTIVE Editor: Stephanie J. Salisbury

Stephanie@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com

Advertising Account Manager: Nicky Graham Nicky@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com

Creative Promotions Manager: Jena Bontrager Jena@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com

Calling all Sassy Ladies...

GRAPHIC DESIGN Manager: Zuzanna Zmud

this sassy gal needs your assistance.

Distribution Manager: John Ferguson

Sassy Magazine has grown so quickly over the past year and a half; so much, in fact, that Sassy Magazine is going live with a brand new website this spring ... and it is FANCY! MichianaSassy.com is loaded with a sassy gal's best resources like things to do each month for GNO (Girls' Nights Out), tips and tricks on home decor trends, fashions that you can find in our very own local boutiques, fabulous contests, dining delights, art & culture and all the finer things that a sassy gal wants at her fingertips. MichianaSassy. com has a sassy personality all her own and you won't want to miss the debut of this savvy site.

To get in on the big launch of our new sassy lady site online for contests, drawings, prizes and Sassy exclusive event announcements, make sure you LIKE or SHARE our Sassy Facebook page during the month of February for sneak peeks and a few surprises just for our special social media gal pals.

Zuzanna@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com

MEDICAL EDITOR: Dr. Jesse Hsieh

SASSY Magazine is a division of Michiana Family Magazines, LLC established in 2006. All rights reserved.

We would love to hear from you! Please submit press releases, event information and inquiries to: Media@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com The FAMILY Magazines 1233 E. University Dr. Granger, IN 46530 PH: 574.387.5420 • FX: 574.217.4700 www.MichianaFamilyMagazine.com Permission from the publisher is required for any reproduction or reprint of this publication.

Read SASSY Magazine online each month!

Go to www.MichianaFamilyMagazine.com and flip the pages, cover-to-cover the organic and green way!

February 2013 Volume 3: Number 2

Stay tuned, stay Sassy and help us make MichianaSassy.com one of your favorite sites!

Rock the hearts this month,

LOOK WHO’s TALKING

follow us on Twitter, and become our fan on Facebook. @SassyMagazine

Betsy

www.facebook.com/Sassy-Magazine pinterest.com/familymags/

4 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

FEBRUARY

/ contributors

LETTER FROM THE

editor

A.J. Mencias, M.D. is a board-certified orthopaedic surgeon with fellowship training in elbow, forearm, wrist and hand surgery. He has earned the Certificate of Added Qualifications in Surgery of the Hand (CAQSH) and joined South Bend Orthopaedics in 2003.

He graduated from the University of Notre Dame and is a physician consultant for ND sports. In his spare time, he enjoys golfing, live music, travel and especially spending time with his kids.

What’s up, Photography: Classic image photography Makeup: Camellia Maalouf, Camellia Cosmetics Granger

Carlos R. Bolden, M.D., received his undergraduate degree with high honors in Biomedical Engineering from Washington University in St. Louis,his medical degree from Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine in Chicago and completed his residency in Ob/Gyn at Duke University Medical Center, trained in high-risk obstetrics and minimally invasive gynecologic surgery, including the da Vinci® robotic surgical system. He provides a full array of obstetric care. His gynecologic care interests include minimally invasive surgery, operative hysteroscopy, advanced operative laparoscopy (including robotic surgery), endometriosis treatment, alternatives to hysterectomy and endometrial ablation. He is a junior fellow of the American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. Dr. Bolden sees patients at The South Bend Clinic Granger – www.SouthBendClinic.com.

Sass-parilla?

I have to say, I’m ready for a white sand beach somewhere with a little cocktail umbrella floating in a glass; hard to find in Michiana in the winter, isn’t it? I keep pushing the heat up in the office, and part of me is daydreaming about bringing in a kiddie-pool, filling it with warm water and sitting in it with my laptop on the office floor, surfin’ music playing on Spotify. Probably not safe, I know. Stop dashing my dreams, woman!

On the bright side, there are some great articles in here to perk up your February blues. What if you could treat yourself to some homemade spa products, have some girlfriends over and make a night of it? Jennifer Warfel Juszkiewicz gives four amazing treatment ideas you can do at home with products you probably already have in her article, “Spa-like Splurge While Spending Less”… I know I’m ready for a little pampering; how about you? And Jane Suter had me cracking up, as always, with her fresh response to her first nail salon experience. Noelle Elliott keeps us warm with her article, “Staying Hot in a Cold Economy” where she travels to several local coffee shops to see just how they do what they do. I could use a nice cup of java right now, actually…

And how about Valentine’s Day coming up? Andrew Skipper shows us how to plan a romantic Valentine’s Night date right inside our home, and Scott Tingwald addresses the business aspects of February 14th in his article, “The Big Business of Love”.

I’m so glad you read Sassy. I mean, where else can you read about envy, business, art, carpal tunnel syndrome, what to ask your OB/GYN and how to make your butt look great in jeans all in one place!?

Scott Tingwald is a Vice President and Director of Account Service at Villing & Company, a South Bend-based marketing communications firm. He and his wife, Christine, reside in Granger with their two daughters. A graduate of Purdue University, Scott loves any and all sports — watching, participating and now working with his daughters in their athletic pursuits.

Let’s get this February started, shall we?

Stephanie

SASSY | FEBRUARY 2013

5

THE SA S SY FACTORY

stuff we love

SASSY Time 1-3

Unnecessary Farce!, South Bend Civic Theatre

7

9

Bob Marley Birthday Bash, Goshen

Amy Allen Clark Booksigning, Our Offices 4-6PM

22

14

Valentine’s Day

Rock of Ages, Morris PAC

15

Sweetheart Ball, Palais Royale

29

There isn’t a 29th.

Celebrate March!

2 4 5 6 8 10 11 12 13 16 17 18 19 20 21 23 24 25 26 27 28 F Sa Su M Tu W Th F Sa Su M Tu W Th F Sa Su M Tu W Th F Sa Su M Tu W Th F

Quotes

A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous. ~Ingrid Bergman Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. ~Lao Tzu

Valentine’s Promises to Your Sweetheart

I promise not to complain about my hips when I get a delicious box of chocolates … I know I’m going to eat four of them immediately when you turn your head and, on the inside, I’m pretty giddy about it.

I promise to get you something equally romantic in your eyes – like sports tickets or a coupon book that’s not lovey-dovey but has fun stuff like “I’ll bring you a beer without mentioning women’s liberation”.

Immature love says, ‘I love you because I need you.’ Mature love says, ‘I need you because I love you.’ ~Erich Fromm Money can’t buy love, but it improves your bargaining position.

~ Christopher Marlowe I love romance. I’m a sucker for it. I love it so much, it’s pathetic! ~Drew Barrymore

6 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

I promise not to drag you anywhere fully painted and carpeted in pink today. (Hopefully, you already went there to buy me something.)

Beat the Blues – Pretend You’re at the Beach!

1. Island music on your MP3 player with some awesome headphones.

2. House to yourself and comfy clothes – or wrapped in a beach towel!

3. Homemade froo-froo drink with sugar on the rim and a little umbrella.

4. Large bucket of very warm water for your tootsies.

5. Heat turned up to 80 just for an hour. ……Ahhhh, bliss!

How to Say “I Love You” in…

Spanish: Te quiero (or Te amo) French: Je t’aime German: Ich liebe dich Hawaiian: Aloha wau ia 'oe Hungarian: Szeretlek te'ged Swedish: Jag älskar dig

Re-Use that Heart-Shaped Candy Box!

Store beads, rings, earrings or other small items in the plastic insert where the candy was.

Glue it shut, slit a hole in one edge and use it to save your pennies – or dollars!

Make homemade candy and share the love with a friend or family member.

App-y Valentine's Day!

Planning a romantic meal for two? Over a hundred recipes are available on this app… delicious! (By Aimfire LLC)

SASSY | FEBRUARY 2013

7

Blush

Bashful YBe His Sweet Heart

Make him blush in our eye catching pink chiffon dress with a zip up front. Its shear V-neck with an added sweet heart neckline is sure to make you feel beautiful on your special night.

Flirt Boutique, Rochester $34 www.YourFlirtBoutique.com

YLuscious Long-Lasting Lipstick

Dreaming of a lipstick that lasts for hours? Try Camellia Cosmetics new Superwear Lipstick to lock in transfer proof color while feeling smooth and comfortable. 6 Shades, $19.

Camellia Cosmetics, Granger & South Bend www.CamelliaCosmetics.com

YValentine’s Day Bouquet

TM

The Valentine’s Day Bouquet™ says it all – I Love You, Happy Valentine’s Day, Just Because. This fruit bouquet is bursting with a whole lot of love featuring chocolate dipped strawberries and pineapple-shaped hearts. A perfect gift for that special someone.

Edible Arrangements, Granger www.EdibleArrangements.com

YPerfectly Pink Bling

This modern 3-piece set is a part of the “Vensuian Collection” from Brighton. It features beautiful square-shaped pink Swarovski crystal stones and is beautifully two-toned and is adjustable. You can find this amazing bracelet at Sorella Boutique!

Sorella Boutique, Granger 574.855.1475

YShow Your Love Tees

Show your love this Valentine’s day with a rhinestone I Y My... t-shirt! Special orders available; sizes Small - X-Large. Call Jules Boutique for available colors and styles!

Jules Boutique, Goshen $26 574.535.1119

YPink Per-suede-sion

This adorable little ballet flat suede shoe in Strawberry/ Fraise by Emu Australia is perfect to wear with skirts, pants and jeans that transition right into Spring!

Inspire Me, South Bend 574.232.1798 SASSY | FEBRUARY 2013

9

SASSY

skin & make-up

SpendingLess

Spa-like Splurge

While

Home Beauty Remedies

By Jennifer Warfel Juszkiewicz

Home beauty remedies have a long history, but not all work well, and some can be dangerous. What doesn’t work well? Rinsing mayonnaise through your hair: it’s a mess, and can make your hair more greasy than shiny. What can be dangerous? In the nineteenth century, women used to incorporate white lead and wax into their facial makeup. Not only could their makeup melt off if they sat too close to the fire, but they could contract lead poisoning.

Yet, beauty products are expensive. The Global Cosmetics Industry Magazine reported that the U.S. personal care market amounted to $38 billion in 2011 alone, up from pre-recession levels. However, the same magazine predicts that DIY solutions (often supported by store-bought systems) will simultaneously grow this year. And it makes sense – why pay for what we can do just as well?

What are some good home remedies that I can use so that I can simultaneously splurge on me-time while I spend less? I surveyed the top web recommendations for home health remedies and I went armed with a set of rules: they had to be easy, solve a problem I actually had, be safe (no lead, of course) and they to had to use ingredients I already owned.

Sweet and Smooth

The winter took a toll on my hands, but Dr. Oz and the Huffington Post both recommended sugar and olive oil as a fixall hand scrub. They didn’t provide recipes, but I developed my own.

Sugar Scrub

3 T extra virgin olive oil (less smelly than standard olive oil) 3 T white sugar Mix together in a bowl; rub mixture on your hands, up your forearms and particularly work into your elbows. To keep your hands from feeling somewhat dusty afterward, be sure to wash them thoroughly with a moisturizing soap in lukewarm water.

Soften your Soles

There’s nothing like hose and pumps to do a number on your feet. Sometimes you just want some pampering. If you have a cozy place to sit, ideally near a bathtub, Fitness Magazine suggests a version of this remedy.

Banana Foot Rub

2 T cornmeal 2 T mashed banana Mix together the ingredients and rub into your feet. Work it in for about a minute or until the skin feels smooth. Rinse under warm, running water (a damp cloth isn’t going to cut it here).

I only found a couple of problems with this recipe. One, it involved getting banana between your toes. Two, I didn’t really have corn meal. I had to use corn muffin mix. Still, it worked, so don’t hesitate to try it for yourself.

Puffy Eyes Get a Treat

It’s an old trick, but it works. Rest some cool, damp chamomile teabags on your eyes for five minutes. It will take down the puffiness and you’ll look so strange that anyone wanting your attention should back away slowly in fear.

One caveat – be sure that you fully wring the teabags before you rest them on your eyes. I managed to get tea in my left eye and was blinking for ten minutes after I removed them. It nearly ruined all my hard work trying to relax.

A Fresh Face on the World

My skin and I have a contentious relationship. I do my best not to let it burn, and it still manages to get age spots and acne simultaneously. But I hesitate to rub tea or coffee into my skin as the caffeine can still seep into your system if it is applied externally.

I don’t want to give myself a relaxing face scrub at night and then not be able to sleep because of it. Still, this easy mask tightened my face and washed off well; I adapted it from a recipe on Picklee.com.

Pore-Shrinking Mask

1 egg white, beaten lightly 1 tsp. corn starch Whisk the two ingredients together until fluffy and bubbly. You don’t need to make a meringue, just a foam. Work it into your skin (I used it on my neck as well) and allow to set for twenty minutes or so. Wash off with a warm, damp cloth. Your skin should feel tightened and clear.

All four of these recipes are perfectly simple. If you want to have a great girls-night-in, consider whipping them all up and having a spa evening. After all, you’ll have some great before, during and after photos to go along with a night of laughter and downhome luxury!

SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

11

SASSY

fashion

Yeah, Butt...

The Obsession to Find the Perfect Jeans

By Kathy Friend

JEANS!

They are the source of our frustration, the backbone to our wardrobes and the thing we can’t seem to live without. They are also the one thing in our closets that can be absolutely perfect…or not so much.

I’m sure we’ve all been with our girlfriends and the topic has come up. One of your friends will say, “Oh my gosh, you HAVE to try XYZ jeans! They are amazing!” So you run out to the boutique and try on the magical XYZ jeans. Your conclusion? You must be immune to the magic.

What is important in a pair of jeans? Here are some basics.

FABRIC

Lycra or Spandex needs to be a part of the fabric content. These fabric ‘fillers’ hold you in and smooth things out.

WAISTBAND

The waistband should fit just below the belly button; you should not see muffin-top (spillage, fluff – whatever you want to call it) over the top of the waistband. If you do, try the next size up. The waistband should be contoured. In other words, the back should be higher than the front.

STYLE

The truth is, most body types can get away with wearing just about any cut of jean if worn correctly. The two cuts of jeans that are constantly no-fail jeans are the boot cut and the straight leg. The boot cut is a jean whose ankle opening is at least 1” larger than the width of the knee. The straight cut jean has an ankle opening that is the same width as the knee.

If you carry your weight in your hips and thighs, then you will want to be sure the jeans (and other pieces you wear with your jeans) distract from your problem area.

Make sure any distressing is in an area that you want people to look at. Do the six-foot mirror test: try the jeans on, step back at least six feet from a mirror and take a picture of yourself in the mirror. You will see where the distressing is and where people are looking when they see you.

IT’S OKAY TO ALTER

We are all friends here, right? I will let you in on a little secret: I have never purchased a pair of jeans I haven’t had altered. Seriously. If there is one secret to a perfectly fitting jean, it’s: ALTERATIONS!

POCKETS

What do you do when you try on jeans? I bet you instantly turn, look over your shoulder and check out your back-side. Right? Of course, you do! The back pockets make or 12 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

break the jeans. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve tried on a great fitting pair of jeans, then turned to check out the back and said “yeah…BUTT!” Here are some things to commit to memory: The placement of the pockets is critical! European fashioned brands have long pockets that extend down past your butt. These low pockets will make your rump look flat. This is okay if you have more than enough junk in your trunk but it’s a slippery slope. Make sure the bottom of the pocket aligns with the top of your thigh. Back pockets need to be centered at the fullest part of your booty.

The pockets should be set at a slight inward angle.

The angle can create an optical illusion that offers a great little round rump. The angle should be from the top down (or the pockets should be closest at the top near the waistband).

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Turn heads and make a statement with Brennan Dental.

Size DOES matter. The higher the pockets sit on your booty, the bigger your booty will appear (remember Lee jeans from the 70s?) Likewise, the larger the pockets, the larger your backside will also look (ahem…Mom Jeans); but this isn’t to say that back pockets should be small, either – it’s all about balance and proportion.

To Bling or not to Bling. If by birth you have a flat back-side, you will need to wear a back pocket with a little somethin’ goin’ on. Flap pockets or over-thetop bling will give the illusions of a fuller booty. If you have some junk in your trunk, you will need a jean without any bling or embroidery on the back pockets. Simple is best for you.

574.259.9956 www.brennandentistry.com http://Facebook.com/BrennanDentalGroup

Bottom line truth is you need to take several styles, cuts and sizes into the dressing room with you. First determining what you want to enhance (and what you want to camouflage) will make that time in the dressing room much easier!

Sassy-Boom1-13.indd 1

SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

13

12/21/12 11:23 AM

THE SA S S FACTORY

advice from a business coach

Dear Charrise...

Have a co-worker who’s driving you batty? A boss who just won’t listen to reason? Or maybe you’re wondering if this is your time to breakout and show the business world what you’re really made of – but you don’t know exactly how to go about it. Sounds like you need some sound business advice! Send your questions to Charrise, our SASSY business coach, and have them answered here. It’s time to get a fresh perspective!

My good friend and I went into the retail business together about two years ago, and everything (expenses, pay, etc.) has been 50/50 down the middle.

It’s worked great up until recently, but now it seems that I’m doing the burden of the work and she’s taking more days off, and not putting as much effort in as I am. I don’t want to hurt our friendship by bringing it up, but I also don’t want to hurt our friendship by NOT saying something. How should I go about this?

Charrise Says There is no real choice here. If you want to maintain a healthy partnership AND friendship, you must have a compelling, honest conversation about your feelings.

Personally, I love Steven Covey’s principle “Seek first to understand, then be understood.” Following this principle almost always results in some surprises about what you thought you knew.

Difficult conversations are less difficult when you ask questions first, rather than leading with communicating your feelings about something. In this case, you might ask something like “Why are you taking so many days off lately? Is there something going on that I should know about?” Perhaps your partner is dealing with something serious that you’re not aware of. You could also ask a general question about how your partner feels the partnership is working. The more questions you ask with a genuine interest in hearing and understanding the answer, the more you will gain the true perspective of your partner.

Friends can create wonderful partnerships, and only if you’re each willing to navigate the territory with an open heart, an open mind and a willingness to have direct, truthful conversations on a regular basis. The advantages are: you know one another well, you care about the other’s well being and you enjoy one another’s company. The only disadvantage is that you have more to lose if a failed partnership results in the end of your friendship. Effective and fearless communication is vital.

I have decided that since the world did not end on December 12, 2012, it is time to make a change in my life. I have been living in fear of making big changes and it is time to let go of the fear. I have a dream of moving to the coast and starting a tiki-themed bar but I can’t seem to find the courage to make the changes in my life that are necessary to make my dream come true. My kids are grown and my husband is supportive of me. How do I get started?

14 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

Charrise Says First, imagine in great detail how it will look, feel, sound and smell, using all your senses to be living on the ocean, owning a tiki bar. If you can imagine it, you are capable of doing it.

Decide what you are most afraid will happen. Imagine that happening, and then decide if you can live through that reality. Know that your fear-mind will conjure the worst case scenario, which rarely actually happens. Can you survive the possibilities that you’re most afraid of? Of course you can. Are you willing to take that risk in order to accomplish your dream?

What are you willing to give up to get what you think you want? Sometimes when you consider the cost, you decide you don’t really want what you thought you wanted. You have to get clear on that. Do you have a business plan? That might be a good first step.

Once you’re certain this is what you want, and you have some version of a plan, determine one teeny tiny baby step you can take, and take it. Small steps move you forward every single time. Do something every day, creating momentum. You know what to do. Trust that voice and get moving.

My partner and I are finally to a point where we are both making more money than is necessary to pay our bills. We have worked extremely hard to become debt-free and recently reached that goal. It feels incredible! We both work in highly physical jobs and come home exhausted but satisfied each evening. I have never felt comfortable with my financial situation so I am not sure how to handle it. I want to put it the extra that we have to good use, but I am not sure where best to apply my extra income. Can you help me find a satisfying way to spread the love?

Charrise Says Congratulations on being debt-free. You are one of a very small minority of people in the U.S. to be without debt, and that is something to be celebrated. It’s the first step toward financial freedom.

The next step is for you to get comfortable with money, so that you can create the kind of wealth that will truly allow you to experience financial freedom. Liberation from your unhealthy money story will position you to shift from paying your bills

to much bigger possibilities. I suggest you invest in yourself to enlist help in healing your emotional issues with money, in order to be willing to receive the abundance that is meant for you.

I believe that you will never create more wealth than your own feelings of self-worth will allow. Explore that truth, and do the inner work to clear that path.

One wealth principal that I personally adopted comes from the premise that you must be willing to give in order to receive. The practical way to do this is to automatically give to a charity of your choice 10% of every dollar that comes into your household.

Take another 10% off the top and create a savings account that is designated for wealth building. The other 80% funds your life (which is meant to be lived within those financial means, without debt). If you do this for the rest of your life, you will be wealthy forever, both emotionally and financially.

As to where to give your money so that it spreads love: there is never a shortage of people who can use your support. Giving is one of the most rewarding experiences a person can have. When it’s your mission to find places to give, the right places will show up for you. ď ¨

Charrise McCrorey is a Certified Transformative Coach, business consultant, writer, and speaker. She works with individuals and business leaders worldwide, with offices in Elkhart and Chicago. She is a catalyst for assisting others in creating a magnificent life and rewarding work.

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574.271.1000 | www.glanceeyeweargallery.com Heritage Square | Granger SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

15

SASSY

healthy living

5

Myths about Carpal Tunnel Syndrome

By A. J. Mencias, M.D.

It’s easy to take our hands, fingers and wrists for granted, but hard to ignore when the tingling, burning pain of carpal tunnel syndrome sets in. Carpal tunnel syndrome, or CTS, is one of the most common repetitive stress injuries that I see in my practice. There are a lot of truths, myths and misconceptions about this condition. I want to address some of the common myths of carpal tunnel so you know for sure whether or not you are suffering from this nagging injury.

It is a debilitating condition that affects over eight million Americans, with about three percent of adults experiencing symptoms according the Journal of the American Medical Association. Women are three times as likely as men to get it, according to the National Institutes of Health, with peak prevalence occurring at age 55. It can cause considerable discomfort and pain if not treated correctly.

Effective treatment is available, but often the syndrome is confused with other medical conditions causing unnecessary delays in treatment.

The symptoms in the early stages of CTS are not very specific. One of the first signs is tingling, numbness and pain in the thumb, index and middle finger and sometimes part of the ring finger. This is often noticed at night but may also accompany prolonged gripping, such as clutching the steering wheel or carrying grocery bags. As the problem progresses, you may start to feel pins and needles in these same areas, followed by increasing pain in the fingers and the wrist.

At this stage, you will notice weakness and loss of control, such as difficulty in picking up and holding small objects.

I see many patients who mistakenly believe they have, or have been mistakenly diagnosed with carpal tunnel syndrome. Although CTS is a common occurrence, in my experience many of the patients who believe that they have carpal tunnel syndrome are, in fact, suffering from another condition causing them pain and discomfort. That is why I have assembled the top five myths regarding this condition.

Myth #1: It only affects the wrist and hand

Carpal tunnel patients often wake up in the middle of the night with hand numbness because of compression of the nerve. But severe carpal tunnel pain can radiate from points as high as the neck, down into the shoulder and arm and into the whole hand. It can be difficult to localize where the tingling is coming from.

The syndrome is the result of pressure and injury to the median nerve, which runs from the forearm through the wrist and hand. It’s a fibrous tissue, and with repeated trauma, it can become even more thick and fibrous, which leads to inflammation and damage.

Myth #2: All hand pain is carpal tunnel syndrome

While it’s true that CTS can be responsible for the majority of hand pain, it could be something else such as broken finger, tendonitis, arthritis or thoracic outlet syndrome.

Since arthritis, tendonitis and other conditions may be compounded by carpal tunnel syndrome, if you have numbness, pain or weakness in your wrists or hands, it’s a good idea to get a hand specialist involved.

16 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

Myth #3: CTS is caused by computer keyboards

Despite a common perception, multiple clinical studies have yet to find a strong connection between heavy computer use and a person’s risk of developing carpal tunnel syndrome. People who used a computer for up to seven hours a day have been found to have no increased risk. In fact, carpal tunnel syndrome is three times higher among assemblers than among data entry personnel, according to the National Institute for Neurological Disorders and Stroke.

CTS affects anyone who grips something tightly or uses their wrists consistently, such as cashiers, cyclists, meat cutters and musicians. Occupations that involve prolonged use of vibrating equipment, such as a jackhammer, are also prone to carpal tunnel syndrome.

Myth #4: Carpal tunnel syndrome is always work-related

A misconception is that carpal tunnel is always related to your line of work. It is not; age, weight, smoker status, diabetes and pregnancy are also risk factors.

Carpal tunnel syndrome comes from any number of repetitive motions that place constant pressure on the wrist, including bicycle riding, motorcycle riding, tennis and golf. Many times, there are no predisposing factors; it simply develops over time as any one motion is repeated.

Myth #5: Surgery is the only option

Actually there are conservative steps that can be taken that don’t involve surgery, such as splints or braces to immobilize and rest the wrist, adjustments to how you perform daily activities, oral anti-inflammatory medications and steroid injections. Several methods of treating carpal tunnel syndrome include: Lifestyle changes. Treatment first involves adjusting the way you perform a repetitive motion, changing the frequency with which you perform it and increasing the amount of rest time between movements.

Immobilization. Treatment also includes immobilizing the wrist in a splint to minimize or prevent pressure on the nerves. Splints that support the wrist in a comfortable neutral position can be of great value if worn at night to relieve painful numbness or tingling.

Surgery. If carpal tunnel syndrome does not respond to conservative treatment, then surgery is the next treatment option. During surgery, your surgeon will open the carpal tunnel and cut the ligament, relieving the pressure. Carpal tunnel surgery is quite effective at relieving painful symptoms when the condition involves only nerve constriction.

The treatment of carpal tunnel syndrome is normally straight forward once an accurate diagnosis has been made. Your hand specialist will examine your hand and arm and ask you about your medical history, any injuries you may have sustained to your hand or arm, the job that you perform, hobbies or sports you participate in, etc. An x-ray or other lab tests may be performed to rule out other causes of your symptoms. ď ¨

Medication. Patients may be given short courses of anti-inflammatory drugs or injections of steroids in their wrist to reduce swelling. Injections are most successful when people have mild to moderate carpal tunnel syndrome as a result of an acute (severe) flare-up.

SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

17

SASSY

healthy living

New Questions for your OB/GYN

By Carlos Bolden, M.D.

It’s 2013,

and you may have some renewed sense of getting to the doctor on a more regular basis. Here are some questions that might give you direction on your next visit to the OB/GYN. Remember, the only questions left unanswered are the ones you don’t ask!

1. Do I really have to get a Pap smear every year?

The short answer is: not necessarily. Although it used to be recommended that every woman visit the gynecologist once yearly for an annual exam, new guidelines approved by the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists allow for many women to forego the annual Pap smear test (a screening test for cervical cancer) for up to five years.

take it only during your cycle for up to five days. For women who don’t want more children, endometrial ablation is an effective treatment for heavy menstrual bleeding. It is a same-day surgical procedure that destroys the lining of the uterus to substantially decrease menstrual bleeding and sometimes eliminate it altogether. Curettage of the uterine lining is another minimally invasive options, often used in the setting of acute bleeding or for women who desire future childbearing.

Another major revision is that for women younger than 21 years, Pap smear screening is not recommended regardless of age of first intercourse. With normal results and no history of abnormal Pap smears, if you are 21-29 years old, a screening with cytology (cells) alone is recommended every three years and, for ages 30-65, screening with cytology and high-risk HPV testing every five years.

3. What is a DEXA scan and when should I start getting it?

2. What are my treatment options when it comes to heavy menstrual bleeding?

The short answer is: many. Although hysterectomy is the definitive treatment for women who have completed childbearing, it is by no means the only option. This is especially important to consider in women who desire more children or those who have yet to conceive. Traditionally, hormonal contraception (birth control pills, injections, intrauterine devices, etc.) has been the mainstay of treatment.

However, there is a new non-hormonal method that can be used when hormonal methods have failed or in patients who want to avoid hormones. Tranexamic acid is a non-hormonal tablet that was FDA-approved in 2009 to treat heavy menstrual bleeding. It is used during your menstrual cycle to lessen menstrual flow. You 18 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

It is essentially a bone density scan that is used to evaluate for osteoporosis. It is the most widely used method for measuring bone mineral density. Testing is recommend for women 65 years of age and older and in postmenopausal women who have clinical risk factors for fracture. Risk factors include current cigarette smoking, steroid therapy, low body weight and history of previous fracture. The frequency of repeat testing is dependent upon the results of initial testing, and this should be discussed with your physician.

4. I am postmenopausal, but I am experiencing occasional vaginal bleeding. Should I be concerned?

The short answer is: Yes. Postmenopausal bleeding (PMB) should ALWAYS be evaluated promptly. The most concerning causes overgrowth of the lining of the uterus and cancer of the uterus. However, other benign maladies such as urinary tract infections and thinning of the vaginal epithelial lining can also

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1180 Edwardsburg Ave. Elkhart, IN 46514 574-264-3821 cause PMB. It is important determine the source. Is it uterine, vaginal, rectal or urinary? The distinction is not always as clear cut as one might imagine.

Determining the source of the bleeding can help guide appropriate care. If the PMB is determined to be uterine in nature, your gynecologist should perform a sampling of the lining of the uterus to rule out cancer or hyperplasia as a cause. Vaginal bleeding can often result from vulvovaginal thinning and can be effectively treated with vaginal estrogen.

The more you ask, the more you know. Never be afraid to bring up anything with your doctor. That what they’re there for. The more thoroughly you are prepared with questions, the more thorough your discussions can be. ď ¨

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www.GetInteriorMotivated.com SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

19

SASSY

design

By Andrew Skipper

It

seems that everyone is so busy these days! Most people get up before the sun rises, spend a few rushed moments with their families before heading out the door to work and don't get home until it's almost dinner time. With this fast paced schedule, it is so important to take some time to reconnect with those you love.

Valentine's Day is the perfect excuse to set aside an evening of romance to celebrate life and love with your special someone.

Planning a seductive night in doesn't mean you have to slave for hours getting things ready or spend a fortune to make your sweetheart feel special. The main focus should be to remember what's truly important – each other – because your relationship should constantly be evolving and growing, whether you've been married 50 years or are just getting to know one another. If planning a romantic evening seems daunting, just remember to keep it simple, give attention to the details and plan ahead as much as you can!

I suggest dividing it into courses. Each course should have its own distinct feel and be served in a different place to keep things interesting. A great way to begin the night is with a champagne or sparkling juice toast. Choose a comfortable place such as the sofa to pop the bubbly and propose a toast to get the excitement flowing. Some stores sell miniature bottles of champagne, which are the perfect size for a toast before dinner. Keep them chilled in an ice bucket and you are ready to start the evening. Some traditional hors d'oeuvres that pair well with champagne are oysters and smoked salmon on buttered brown bread. If you don't want to splurge or are short on time, no need to worry! Classic potato chips are a perfect compliment to champagne. All you have to do is serve them in a beautiful bowl! It doesn't get much easier than that.

Get creative and pull items from other areas of your home in order to create a unique atmosphere for each course of the night. A silver cake stand and silver tray elevate the feel of the coffee table, while two Swarovski crystal figures that usually reside in the curio cabinet are brought out to depict a love scene which sets the tone for this romantic night.

It is the small details that help elevate the feel of the evening.

When you set your table for dinner, why not mix it up a bit.? Since it is a table for two, set up a small round table somewhere other than the dining room. I've chosen to set a table up by the fireplace; is anything more romantic than that? As you set the table, keep in mind that it should be a feast for the senses. Layers of fabric, lots of textures, 20 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

patterns and vibrant colors create a dramatic setting.

For my centerpiece, I've used a menagerie of white vases. On their own, they would be ordinary… but, grouped together on a silver tray, they become almost sculptural. Beautiful red tulips and curly willow branches make a simple yet elegant display.

On a nearby pedestal table, dessert and coffee are waiting to be enjoyed. What's more light and decadent than strawberries and chocolate? I love how simple and effortless this pairing is. Just stop by the supermarket and pick up a package of strawberries along with some Ghirardelli chocolates and place them in beautiful bowls. Make this afterdinner time special by serving coffee from a beautiful silver or porcelain pot. Nothing makes people feel special like using the ‘good stuff ’!

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End your evening with a nightcap such as brandy, bourbon or a cream-based drink. Nightcaps or cordials are meant to be consumed before retiring to bed. Usually the alcohol content in the type of beverage is higher than a glass of wine or beer, making them perfect for enjoying as you wind down.

A beautiful tray with a decanter and two glasses can be carried with you into the bedroom to top off the romantic night.

A romantic evening for two doesn't have to be complicated or over-the-top. Always keep in mind that the goal is to make your significant other feel special and valued. Plan ahead and put some thought into what you will serve and how you will serve it. If you are prepared, you will be relaxed, which will lead to easy conversation and a perfect evening to reconnect with the one you love. 

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SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

21

SASSY

art

Finding

Women Artists

Constance Mayer and Emmi Whitehorse in Search of Identity

Y

By Cheryl K. Snay

ou survived the holiday craziness in December, the little family dramas, the crafting, decorating, wrapping, baking, parties, performances and picture-taking. Now kick back and take some inspiration from some other creative women, both past and present.

Constance Mayer’s portrait of a woman of the early 1800s is something we can all relate to. Far from the polished portraits of poised and elegant fashionistas, Mayer’s depiction of a woman with a kerchief on her head speaks of a different moment from what we expect of turn-of-the-century portraiture. Once thought to be a self portrait, the painting is small, intimate, approachable. The sitter has let her hair down; her lips slightly parted – a working woman at break.

Mayer (1775–1821) was one of the few women to achieve the status of professional artist in France at the turn of the 1800s. She studied with important artists at the time: Jean-Baptiste Greuze and Jacques-Louis David.

Her work was accepted into the official Salons organized by the French government. Among the many portraits she painted are occasional efforts at mythological subjects, especially Venuses and Cupids, symbols of love.

Her list of titles includes moral narratives, such as The Unfortunate Family or The Dying Worker, The Happy Mother (surrounded by children) and The Unhappy Mother (mourning the loss of an infant). She was assigned an apartment and studio at the Sorbonne, just like other accomplished male artists at the time, such as Pierre-Paul Prud’hon, a favorite painter of the emperor Napoleon and both of his wives.

Prud’hon, a married man with children, took Mayer under his wing. His wife was declared insane and committed to a mental hospital leaving him alone to care for his children. Mayer became his muse, his artistic collaborator, his protégé, a nanny to his unruly and unappreciative children, his housekeeper and, predictably, his lover. This was apparently a mutually beneficial arrangement, at least for a while. Prud’hon encouraged Mayer in her work. He prodded her to take on more substantive projects both in subject matter and scale. She took his advice and produced mythological and allegorical paintings that were the purview of ‘serious’ artists: men. One such painting was The Dream of Happiness which shows young newlyweds with their baby in a boat floating down the river of life between figures of love and fortune.

Critics skewered her, saying she had overstepped her bounds and should revert to nice pictures of flowers, pretty women and children, or try her hand at landscapes. Prud’hon dismissed the critics and, being a man secure in his own position, couldn’t understand why she was so upset. He continued to support her efforts. He sketched ideas for pictures, and she executed the paintings to which she put her own signature with his blessing. In some respects, it was a progressive and professional partnership.

On a personal level, not so much. Prud’hon’s absent wife took a turn for the worse in the hospital and, at the prospect of her demise, Mayer asked Prud’hon if they would finally be married. She had waited so long, endured the cruelty of his children who remained loyal to their mother throughout her illness, had maintained her own household and studio at the Sorbonne, and his! Prud’hon declined, saying he would never marry again. Mayer 22 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

Constance Mayer (French, 1775-1821), Portrait of a Woman, n.d., oil on canvas. Snite Museum of Art: Gift of Mr. and Mrs. James W. Alsdorf, 1986.052.004.

descended into a deep depression, and ultimately committed suicide in his studio.

This tragic event became fodder for romance writers for years to come.

It made the newspapers; prints depicting the bloody scene were widely distributed. Prud’hon was crushed. Whatever his attitude toward marriage, he no doubt loved Mayer. He mounted a retrospective exhibition of her paintings. It’s the only contemporary and accurate record of her work that we have. Subsequent, unscrupulous dealers muddied the waters by reattributing her paintings to Prud’hon knowing they would fetch more money on the market. Despite Prud’hon’s best efforts to preserve his lover’s artistic reputation, she was lost in the shuffle of time and the market.

Interest in her work resumed only in the 1970s when feminist artists and art historians sought to rehabilitate the careers of women long since buried under the weight of history, which is why there are so many question marks surrounding the little painting.

The inscription on the back of the frame suggests that it is a self-portrait.

Her biographer, however, described her with dark hair, brown eyes, and a dark complexion. Did she ‘clean herself up’ to conform to contemporary ideals of feminine beauty? Or is this an instance of a dealer attempting to add value to an unsigned, undated, unidentified painting?

Emmi Whitehorse, a Navajo artist born in New Mexico in 1957, doesn’t

make self-portraits, choosing instead to focus on fantastical landscapes or mystical cosmologies, such as Pollination, to tell her personal story of growing up on a reservation. Like many indigenous artists, Whitehorse

straddles two worlds: her Native American heritage and the Euro-American culture that surrounds it. Raised by her grandmother and older sister, she helped with keeping sheep. Her family earned enough money from selling wool to live comfortably for a year. Her grandmother was an accomplished weaver; her craft a source of pride and income for the family.

Whitehorse’s perspective isn’t what we would expect. In one interview, she reports, “In my family, the female owned everything, the women ran everything. They owned the land and the sheep. They nurtured and carried the family. The woman was responsible for the survival of the people. So in my work, the female is… like this big Goliath in the work.

The male image is tiny.” (Messengers of the Wind: Native American Women Tell their Life Stories) As a child, Whitehorse attended a Bureau of Indian Affairs boarding school where the students were required to wear dresses, hose and tight girdles. Her hair had to be curled, braided or pinned up. Students were not allowed to speak Navajo. Boys and girls were separated except at meal times when their seating arrangement was alternated boy-girl; highly artificial and alien to Native cultures. One Christmas, not a holiday that a Native American would have been familiar with, she received as a gift a Barbie doll. You know, the blonde one with the permanently perfect blue eye shadow, size D bust, tiny waist and the pointy toes made for wearing high heels.

Now this may seem like a perfectly acceptable gift to most Sassy readers. Being the youngest of three girls, I inherited my older sisters’ dolls and had a veritable army of Barbies (and two Kens, and Skipper!). But for a Native American child, this was the source of great anxiety.

Summers were spent with family and in Navajo customs and traditions: ceremonies for puberty, weddings, blessings for new homes and healing for her mother.

Having won a small award to attend the art program at the University of New Mexico, Whitehorse left the reservation. Enrollment for women was pretty low in the late 1970s when she started, and the art history classes focused on male artists. Between Barbie and Picasso (whom she had never heard of before college), Whitehorse attempted to erase her Navajo identity. After a period of creative crisis, she returned to her heritage, reflecting on her grandmother’s weavings and the creation myths featuring Changing Woman (the Navajo equivalent of Eve) that she used to tell. Objects from her childhood appear in her prints: a comb for carding wool, scissors for shearing sheep, wedding baskets, the shape of a cradleboard used to carry babies. No longer concerned with Barbies or European masters, Whitehorse has begun to enjoy success.

Emmi Whitehorse (American, Navajo, b. 1957), Pollination, 2011, color monotype with collage. Snite Museum of Art: Acquired with funds provided by the Humana Foundation Endowment, 2011.030.001-003.

We all have questions about who we are. Mayer and Whitehorse battled social conventions that served to define them, and their art helped them express their desires and find their identities. Though January is gone, make a resolution to visit your local museums to learn about the women who fought the good fight with varying degrees of success.  SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

23

SASSY

art

Getting Into the Mix KitchenAid and Local Artist Dean Loucks Collaborate

By Stephanie J. Salisbury

n a ‘former life’, I spent seven years as a baker. Every day, I would pour ingredients into a KitchenAid stand mixer (of the plain white variety), and start my own personal magic which would end up as several dozen blueberry muffins, carrot cake, cream cheese concoctions, frosting, cookies and more. Never, in my wildest dreams, did I ever think of the mixer as a canvas.

But Dean Loucks does.

His gallery celebrates “a lifetime of custom art”, wherein Dean has painted such canvases as helicopters, pianos, high-end boats, coaches and RVs so when it comes to dabbling in the creative, he’s not only outside the box, he’s outside the whole packing zone and possibly on another, much cooler planet.

Beth Robinson, Brand Experience Senior Manager for KitchenAid, tells the story this way: “A friend of someone on the KitchenAid team saw a toaster that Dean painted, and brought it to our attention. We loved the artwork and reached out to Dean to see if he would be interested in custom painting KitchenAid small appliances and, in particular, the stand mixer. We loved the fact that Dean is a local artist and this would bring support to our community.”

How cool is it that someone calls, trusts you with their product and, even more, trusts you to interpret their vision with your art? I am thankful for the opportunity.

Dean was more than happy to oblige. “This is another side of my artwork,” he muses. “To go from big to small is fun and I find it intriguing. The KitchenAid stand mixer is a neat appliance, and it is interesting for me working with the small parts and working with new shapes. I knew it would be a fun project from the beginning.”

All of the stand mixers remain 100% functional, so were I to go back to my former baking life, I could do so with pizzazz! Cheetah and zebra prints, beautiful pastels and flowers – what a way to express yourself, especially in your own home décor or small business. A regular fully-functional stand mixer on the KitchenAid site 24 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

(www.shopkitchenaid.com) runs about $320, but a custom-painted, one-of-akind piece of artwork by Dean Loucks stand mixer is $1,899.99.

Robinson continues, “When it comes to color in the kitchen, KitchenAid has been a pioneer. We’ve been offering colorful stand mixers since the 1950s. A splash of color is a great way to make a personal statement. Customization is something we’ve been discussing for years. It’s really a natural progression for us. The custom designs by Dean take that personalization to another level.”

And what a level, indeed! The passion that Dean Loucks has for what he does is unparalleled. “I spent a lot of time and put a lot of love in my work over the years, and that has brought me where I am today,” he explains. “I put my whole being into every project I work on. Anyone who buys a KitchenAid stand mixer with my custom art is really getting a piece of my love and life. There is a story

behind each special piece.” You can view his gallery online at www. deanloucksart.com. “I have hand-painted over 100 pieces!”

Each of them are meticulously hand-painted over three days, according to Robinson. “Dean is an accomplished artist and we value his work and designs. These mixers are for those who want something very special, or want to give something special.”

“I truly love working with a company like KitchenAid,” says Dean, “because I thrive in understanding their vision and interpreting their idea with my art. They communicate what they are looking for and I run with it… I would launch another project with KitchenAid in a heartbeat.” When I asked him to choose a favorite piece of stand mixer artwork, Dean declined. “That is impossible for me; it is like choosing a favorite child. I don’t think I can – too many cool ones!”

It’s a beautiful thing to see a true collaboration in the business world, as it rarely happens to be so stunning. Dean puts it best: “If it were not for my customers, and companies like KitchenAid coming up with ideas that force me to take it to the next level, make me challenge myself and want to give them something more than what they are asking for, we would not be where we are today. How cool is it that someone calls, trusts you with their product and, even more, trusts you to interpret their vision with your art? I am thankful for the opportunity.” 

SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

25

ADVENT URE S IN

sassydom

Gel Nails

& I

know there are women who adore having their nails done in a salon. They schedule weekly appointments, lose their minds over the latest OPI color and pay for monthly ridge-fillings. I am not one of them. In fact, if given the choice between a long, complicated afternoon at the gynecologist’s office and an hour at a nail salon, I would choose the stirrups. Giddy-up! So imagine when my sister asked me to join her for a manicure. She was getting married and I was her bridesmaid. In other words, I couldn’t say ‘no’. So, I pretended to be thrilled as we entered Princess Nail Palace on Friday.

We were greeted by a tiny Asian woman who immediately directed us. “YOU. Go to Station Four. Sit down! We make you look pretty.” I wanted to look pretty, so I sat down and told Mei Ling as Station Four that I desired gel nails. The trouble was, Mei Ling didn’t speak any English. So I spoke louder – because that’s always effective. “I want GEL NAILS! GEELLLL!” I also added in gestures, a mime performance and pointed at pictures. Just as I was about to give up, she figured out what I was saying and grabbed my hand firmly.

Quick as lightening, she clipped off my three good nails and placed a surgical mask over her face. Then she whipped out the torture devices: nail files, scissors, power tools, chemicals and a dozen foot-long fake nails. It was Bill Nye the Science Guy meets Bob Vila. I was visibly shaking. Still, I couldn’t stop her as she grabbed the Dremel and assaulted my hand. I kid you not, there was actual smoke rising from my fingers and, based on the sulfuric burn I was experiencing, my nails were due to spontaneously combust at any moment. I would have run screaming out of there, but the fine particulate matter surrounding Station Four blinded me to the exit. When the dust did finally settle, my fingers looked like a saw mill floor. “Go wash your hands and come back,” she ordered. I sheepishly complied.

Other Salon Horrors

By Jane Suter

Clearly suffering from Stockholm Syndrome, I gave her my hand once again and she glued on the plastic talons. In a fog, I vaguely remember her brandishing the dreaded, enormous nail file. Like a maniacal lumberjack she sawed back and forth on my nails hitting speeds upwards of 185 MPH. It hurt so intensely that I pulled back my hand and made an ouchy face; hoping she would cease and desist. Yet my reaction set off a horrible cosmic chain of events I now refer to as the ‘Why Didn’t I Study Chinese in College Corollary’.

Here’s what happened ...

After my pain-filled pantomime, Mei Ling began ranting forcefully, in her native tongue, to her co-workers. Remember, I don’t speak Mandarin. Yet, I am still a woman. Therefore, I am an expert in translating the universal language of backstabbing, and my manicurist was nailing me! But what could I do? So I just sat there as she paused every few minutes to smile at me like I was entirely unaware of what was really going on. But oh, I knew! Nevertheless, my fingers were in her hands, so I took the obvious affront and sucked it up, along with the toxic fumes.

By the time she was done, I was wasted. I know this because when she placed my hands into the miniature UV tanning beds, I actually felt relaxed. And, once my new nails hardened, I was finally free.

Or was I? I immediately found out my fancy hands were now as useful as a box of hair. The long, thick nail-prosthetics I just had installed hindered my every move. I fumbled to get my keys out of my purse and could barely open my car door. It took me a full fifteen minutes to text my husband and another three to start my car. And, going to the bathroom? Fuhgedd-aboud-it. Imagine zippering up your pants with

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wine corks super-glued to your fingertips. And did I mention the noise? As I’m typing this, it sounds like ten-million Bic pens are tapping furiously on a desk in a cave!

Other than that, I’m pretty pleased. And my sister’s hands looked beautiful, too.

Of course, about three weeks from now, a chip will cause me to obsessively and furiously dismantle these plastic pretties. I’ll liberate each finger, one by one, from its nail-jail and probably break a tooth in the process. My cuticles will shiver from the sudden jolt of oxygen and I will be left with the stumpy hands of a third-grader once more. Yet, I won’t care. And neither will my gynecologist. Because the next time someone tries to rope me into getting a manicure, I’m telling them I have a previous appointment with some stirrups. Yeah. At least I know what I’m getting myself into when I go there! 

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SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

27

You can have anything in this world you want, if you want it badly enough and you're willing to pay the price. ~Mary Kay As 28 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

~ Eileen Fisher, Fashion Designer

Woman SASSY

THE

“Life-fulfilling work is never about the money – when you feel true passion for something, you instinctively find ways to nurture it.”

Business

Michiana Business Women Striving for Work, Life, Balance.

THE

Woman

SASSY Business

Love

The BIG Business OF

By Scott Tingwald

E

specially for those who may be without a significant other to dote on this Valentine’s Day, it is easy to dismiss the importance of February 14th as simply another self-serving, overly-promoted event created to help card stores, flower shops and candy retailers stimulate sales during what would otherwise be a slow time of year. At first blush, it would seem that its relative significance compared to ‘real’ holidays like Christmas, Thanksgiving, Halloween and even the Fourth of July is, in the big picture, minor.

And while Valentine’s Day may seem more contrived and less substantial than the aforementioned, its importance for retailers, and, thus, our local and national economy, cannot be denied. Especially as we try to further distance ourselves from the residue of the recent recession.

Consumers’ ‘better halves’ are projected to spend an average of $74.12 According to the National Retail Federation’s 2012 Valentine’s Day Consumer Intentions and Actions survey, conducted by BIGinsight, the average person celebrating the holiday this year will shell out $126.03, up 8.5 percent over last year’s $116.21 and the highest in the survey’s 10-year history. Total spending is expected to reach $17.6 billion.

Breaking down the numbers, consumers’ ‘better halves’ are projected to spend an average of $74.12 on their spouse or significant other, up from $68.98 last year. Additionally, consumers will spend an average of $25.25 on their children, parents or other family members and $6.92 on friends. And it doesn’t stop there.

Valentine’s Day is also a time when pet owners show their love – doling out an average of $4.52 on their pets according to the survey. All this spending provides further proof that, as a society, we’ve certainly evolved from simply contributing to the bottom line of the traditional Valentine’s Day retail benefactors.

30 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

Nikoleta Panteva, senior analyst at IBISWorld – the world’s largest independent publisher of U.S. industry research – claims their organization breaks out Valentine’s Day spending as follows: Dining out accounts for 47.4%; 13.9% candy; 11.6% romantic getaways; 8.5% flowers; 7.8% jewelry; 6.3% clothing

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and lingerie; and 4.4% greeting cards. These figures are reflective of research provided by South Source, a publication of South University.

In other words, if you own a restaurant, hotel or operate a bed and breakfast in the South Bend area, it must feel like Notre Dame adding a seventh home game to their football schedule every February.

And while we’ve expanded from the time-honored classics of just buying candy and cards, there’s one aspect of the day that remains the same. Ladies, this day is for you. The BIGinsight survey predicts that the average male will spend $168.74 on clothing, jewelry, greeting cards and more this year - nearly twice as much as women, who are expected to spend an average of $85.76.

So scoff at the notion of dropping $100-$200 on your significant other, kids and other family members this Valentine’s Day if you like. Refuse to contribute to, what Jay Leno jokingly referred to as “extortion day for men” in one of his monologues.

Come February 14th, the reality is that there will be enough people sharing their affection with the swipe of debit and credit cards that, at least for a short time, it will feel like Christmas all over again for many retailers.

Because while red may be the official color of Valentine’s Day, retailers simply love the idea of so much green helping put them in the black.  SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

31

THE

Woman

SASSY Business

Staying Hot in a

Cold Economy

By Noelle Elliott

O

ne early morning when I eagerly poured my first cup of coffee, it came out as muddy water. Two things occurred to me.

1. I need more sleep.

2. I should leave it to the professionals.

As harrowing as this was, I rushed out the door knowing I could swing by and get one to go. I was already late and the Starbucks line seemed to reach Detroit. If people had to pay a dollar for every word in their drink order, they may rethink their beverage.

I decided to ditch the line and cross the street to Quincy’s. It doesn’t have a drive-thru, so I was forced to walk into the café, which embraced me with a fireplace and music. I ordered a coffee and the friendly barista sent me on my way.

I have been going back ever since.

There is nothing new about people’s love for coffee. My grandfather would meet his buddies in a diner to reminisce over a cup. My friends and I have spent many nights laughing and crying over coffee. At times, I believe it has made me a better mother.

Coffee has been a companion of mine for a long time.

Lately, however, designer coffee has become chic and (judging by paparazzi photos), celebrity consumption fuels the trend.

We need local coffee shops now more than ever. They are the small gathering spaces that make a community great. As with any small business, they have been challenged to survive in this economy. I was curious about this and decided to speak with the owners.

Each person welcomed me in like a houseguest. Coffee shop owners have a common thread, and that is a love of coffee and community. Phil Schreiber of the Chicory Café is a perfect example of this. He works tirelessly but joyfully for the sole purpose of giving his customers an experience of genuine hospitality.

“The coffee shop is that third place in many people’s lives. In many ways, they feel at home when they walk in the doors and, I think, many times refreshed having found a few moments of peace in a busy and hectic life,” says Myron Bontrager of the Electric Brew in Goshen.

32 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

Ismail Egilmez of Quincy Café said, “What I love about our customers is that it is a creole of people, from students to grandmothers playing cards.

As long as people have a good little table to talk around, the atmosphere will never go out of style.”

He was raised in South Bend and yearned to combine his love of music, art and coffee. Quincy’s is the embodiment of this. He welcomed me to try one of his vanilla lattes which, when he described it, sounded more like a love song than a beverage.

There is a small coffee shop in Elkhart that has become part of the community’s tapestry. The Daily Grind’s owner, Tanya Bleiler, spoke with me about how her business has grown and, according to locals, become a staple of downtown.“I have known mothers who were pregnant and now their children are driving,” she said. The pride in her voice was evident as she talked about her customers and the storms they have weathered together as a community.

Tanya began her career in the Army but, after a visit to Prague, she fell in love with its coffee shops. She knew a coffee shop was her calling and, thankfully for Elkhart, she answered it.

“My love of iced mochas started this place: the chill with hot espresso, along with the beautiful dark chocolate, milk and ice – it is like heaven.” Spoken like a poet whose muse is espresso.

How important is it to shop locally? According to Aaron J. Perri, Executive Director of Downtown South Bend, Inc.: extremely. “While the numbers vary based on which study you choose to cite, on average economists state that locally-owned businesses generate 70 percent more local economic impact than chains (the number is even more drastic when including Internet options).

This means that, for every dollar spent at a locally owned businesses, $0.72 will stay in South Bend as compared to only $0.42 that is spent at a chain. Those desiring to make a major impact in their community should remember this when choosing where to eat out, where to buy their groceries, where to get their car fixed or where to buy a gift. If residents … shifted just 10 percent of their buying habits away from chains, we’d conservatively generate several million dollars of new, local economic activity.”

This month, as you are rushing to grab a coffee, slow down and visit one of our local coffee shops.

When you do you will be supporting more than just your coffee habit. 

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33

THE

Woman

SASSY

Winning Business

on the Web

How to Start and Succeed with an Online Business

By Jennifer Warfel Juszkiewicz

It seems everyone is doing it! My friend Laura supplements her minimal income as a graduate student by knitting. She sells her knitwear online at a site called Etsy. In her free time, another friend sells her handmade pet products on a website she developed with the aid of a web designer. And another friend has started making some extra cash by reclaiming and remaking jewelry, then selling it from her designated Facebook page.

bids or hire a specific designer directly, all through the site.

Notice a trend?

Before you ‘open your doors’, be sure you’re prepared and protected. Here’s a quick checklist:

None of these women have left their day jobs for an online business. The most successful makes a few thousand dollars a year. But they each love their work, and they aren’t alone. According to the Indiana Commission for Women, there are nearly 130,000 women-owned businesses in Indiana, and web businesses are certainly a growing sector.

But starting web businesses can be just as complex as starting a brick-andmortar one, even if the initial costs are often less. Here are some quick points to keep in mind.

Finding Your Niche

First, what will your business be? If you want to make a product, you should know exactly what it is, have confidence you can make the appropriate quantity and quality and determine your overhead.

Even if you want to provide a service, you still need to determine the overhead costs of presenting and selling that service. For example, many graphic designers sell their services online, often paying subscription to sites like Guru. com where they post their profiles and portfolios. Customers can then seek 34 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

Once you know what your product will be and you’ve seen how similar companies have arranged their sites, develop a detailed outline of what you want and why. Having this clear vision is essential.

Behind the Scenes

 Talk to a financial advisor or accountant about how your business should be filed on your taxes. Create a start-up budget (which may be quite low) and project how much you’ll need to make in the first three years to stay open.  Do some research to find out how you can make the Web work for you.

Will you hire a web designer, pay membership to an online marketplace (like Ebay or Etsy) or design your own site using a system like the one on GoDaddy.com (which is very user-friendly and relatively inexpensive)?

Can you take advantage of additional development and management tools, such as those available online at sites such as 37signals.com?  Purchase your domain name. Be sure this name is simple, without hyphens or punctuation, and that it adequately reflects your business. Try to make it a .com rather than a .biz or .net.  Work with a bank to set up a checking account. Determine how your product/service will be purchased. If you choose a PayPal account, for example, ensure that your bank account will allow those direct deposits.  File your business with the state. There are many resources that can help

you with this and other business-owner issues: the Indiana Commission for Women, the U.S. Small Business Association or the Indiana Department of Administration’s Minority and Women’s Businesses division.

Patience is Key

Once you have your business up and running, you may learn the same lesson my three friends did – patience is vital, and don’t expect miracles.

According to a 2009 article in Time Magazine, there’s a goal for the first few years of a developing online business: to be ‘ramen profitable’. This means that your business will make at least enough to keep you living on freeze-dried noodles. Once you hit that mark, you’re doing well.

Don’t start a company assuming that it will make as much as your current job. And because you will probably be working two jobs at once, be sure your online business only takes as much time and energy as you can afford to give it. But, once you jump in, remember to be proud of your work. As one famous female business owner, Debbi Fields, said, "The important thing is not being afraid to take a chance. Remember, the greatest failure is to not try. Once you find something you love to do, be the best at doing it." 

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SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

35

THE

Woman

SASSY Business

Silencing the

Green-Eyed Monst er 7 Ways to Squelch Envy

By Meagan Francis

Let’s talk about money. The mistakes we’ve made with it, what we want to do with it, how we’re trying to use it more wisely and how we feel about it. A lot of us feel conflicted: we want ‘enough’, but we don’t want to be materialistic.

We want to be happy for our friends (and those imaginary Joneses) who are doing really well, and content with our own standard of living, but sometimes jealousy and envy are hard to resist. I’d like to share a few strategies that have worked for me when it comes to keeping jealousy and envy at bay. Some of these are moneyand-material-goods specific, while others can apply to anything.

1. Think in Terms of World Standards

In comparison to many places in the world, pretty much everyone reading this is rich. Keeping that in mind goes a long way toward getting a grip and some perspective when I’m feeling cranky about my saggy sofa.

2. Hang Out with People in the Same Boat

You don’t have to avoid your financially-better-off in-laws or dump those friends who seem to ‘have it all’. But sometimes, you need to be around people who are in the same position as you so that you don’t start getting the idea that everybody else in the world has ______. And having friends who get where you’re coming from can bolster you up and help you feel less influenced by people who try to make you feel less-than.

3. Analyze Your Envy.

When I feel my eyes turning green, I take some time to sort out whether I really want what the other person has. Does it just seem glamorous or exciting at the moment? Would I really be willing to make the trade-offs necessary to get whatever it is? Often, when I really think about it, I realize the answer is ‘no’.

4. Envy Can Inspire

Sometimes, after careful consideration, I realize that I really do want what the other person has, and am willing to work or sacrifice for it. At that point, fretting over how unfair life is has about a zero success rate. I might not ever write a bestselling book, but I can use the inspiration from famous authors to chase that dream. Life is not either/or, and

sometimes working toward a dream is almost as satisfying as reaching it. The more I focus on my own goals and the life I want to create for myself, the less I worry about what other people might be doing or getting.

5. Remember: Life is Long

Most likely, you still have plenty of years ahead of you to travel, play in a cover band, bicycle crosscountry or buy a house on the beach. It might not happen today or this year, but that doesn’t mean you won’t get there.

6. Embrace the Ways You are Different

Come to your choices – and even some of the things that don’t exactly feel like choices – with a sense of intention and optimism, even if you have to fake it ’til you make it. Okay, so you’re driving a rusty old clunker; what positive feelings can you glean from that experience? Maybe you can smile at the funny memories you’ll have later, or perhaps you just appreciate that you aren’t losing several hundred bucks a month on a car payment.

What positives have you left unexamined?

7. Don’t Knock Others

But don’t confuse embracing your choices with knocking down somebody else’s: you can celebrate the fact that you aren’t in debt without feeling superior to those who use credit cards.

You can enjoy your quiet evenings at home without feeling sure the parents spending their evenings at the football field are miserable. Your values are just the things you value, and we don’t all value the same things equally. That’s, as they say, what makes the world go ’round.  SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

37

SASSY

connections

Too Married to Date

By Jane Suter

A

fter ten years of marriage, it seems I have to start dating again. Completely irritated, I broke the news to my husband Michael. I mean, if I have to start dating, so does he. Fair is fair.

Consequently, the Google-fest began as I searched for restaurants, sorted through our schedules for the rare, free evening and arranged for a babysitter. It was all so ridiculous. I mean, isn’t the whole point of getting married entrenched in the notion that you don’t ever have to date again? But here I was, suckered into

the popular belief that if you don’t organize romantic events with your spouse, minus the kids, you are doomed for The Big D. Well, I certainly didn’t want to get divorced, so I made the plans. But still, a few things were bothering me about this whole concept.

First, why do we have to call it date night? The title puts so much pressure on parents. Why not label it what it really is: ditching the kids. Then we wouldn’t feel the stress to make it all wine-and-roses perfect. Second, Michael and I are ridiculously happy. Gross, huh? But it’s true. Of course we don’t tango at sunset or stare adoringly into each other’s eyes for hours at a time, but what we do works for us.

For example, dinner time. You see, the bald man and I have a simple, non-verbal agreement. I give him the big piece of chicken at supper and, in return, he kills the bugs that enter our house. It’s these little gestures of love that keep our marriage strong. Plus, our arrangement has a built in fail-safe. You see, the day he stops murdering creepy crawlers for me is the day I start hacking his e-mail account. See how easy that is? So do we really need a date to improve our obvious wedded bliss? I was skeptical.

Plus, I wanted to know who came up with this idea in the first place? It certainly wasn’t trendy when I was a kid. In fact, I don’t recall my parents ever dating each other. Their special time as a couple was inviting friends to our house to play cards. Us kids would be kicked outside or exiled to the basement. We would amuse ourselves by spying on the adults or playing flashlight tag. Why can’t we do that today? Have we become so arrogant in this computer age? (Oh, wait a minute… my parents got divorced. Okay, so maybe there is something to this whole romance thing. I better take this seriously.)

Friday night was the big event, so I pulled out all the stops. I shaved my legs, curled my hair, put on my black jeans (not the blue ones) and even applied lipstick. I was unrecognizable. After dropping the kids off at Grandma’s house, I blasted the car radio and sang loudly the whole way home. Yeah, this date night thing was pretty darn fun so far. When Michael arrived home, off we went to enjoy an evening of refined equine entertainment. Translation: we hit the track, hunkered down over two dozen hot wings and bet on the ponies. I told you, it’s the little things. Long story short, we had a BLAST! And I must tell you the best part; we both got to sleep in the next day. There are no words ….

Thus ended our obligatory marriage-enhancing-activity. Based on the articles I have read, I not only saved us from any future divorce, but also firmed up our already solid marriage. In a nutshell, I rawk.

I’ll probably schedule a few more of these interludes. Maybe quarterly like corporate taxes. And I just might arrange something more romantic for our next adults-only evening. Perhaps zip-lining or skiing? Ooh la la! In the meantime, we’ll keep on doing what we’ve always done. Like snuggling up on the sofa at night and watching movies together after the boys go to bed. Sure, it’s not very sexy, but it makes my husband and I supremely happy. And that’s all that really matters to us in our bug-free, big-piece-of-chicken marriage. 

SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

39

SASSY

real life

Fight the Urge…

To Shop!

5 Ways to Control Impulse Buying

By Jennifer Warfel Juszkiewicz

Automatic cheese graters. French capers jarred in heavy oil. Reusable ice cubes shaped like penguins. You know – the things you buy but you never use. “Why did I buy this stuff?” you wonder later.

Nearly all of us impulse buy sometimes, says Ian Zimmerman, Ph.D., in a 2012 article in Psychology Today: “A certain (modest) level of impulse buying can be harmless.

However, an excessive level of impulse buying can lead to debt and unhappiness.”

Curbing our splurging has become particularly important since the recession began.

What was once a harmless spree can now complicate the bills for a month and our closet space for a year. So, after some research and personal self-reflection, I’ve gathered the top five tips to help you keep your shopping habits in the bag.

1.

Don’t shop when you’re hungry or upset.

If you’re like me, you stop at the store on your way home from work, a good five hours after your last meal. Even the gelatinous chicken salad looks good at this point. Keep snack bars in the car and have one before you shop. If possible, don’t go near the aisles where you know you’re most vulnerable.

Similarly, don’t use shopping as a way to feel better. It won’t work. Not only do clothes look worse on you when your eyes are red and puffy, but your judgment is also compromised. Wait until you’ve calmed down before you grab the credit cards.

2.

Leave the cards at home.

Speaking of those credit cards – don’t bring them with you, especially if you’re going out with friends. We all have friends who satisfy their shopping cravings by encouraging us to shop instead. They get the pleasures of the purchase with out the price tag. If you’re heading out with one of these charming ladies, leave those credit cards in your sock drawer. Instead, grab a set amount of cash. Once the cash is gone, you’re done.

3.

Go armed… with a list.

Decide what meals you’re going to make for the next few days, check your inventory and then make your shopping list. Yes, this is a pain, but it will keep you on track when you shop. You won’t wander through the aisles, trying to remember what you need, becoming an unwitting victim to product placement.

Think you’re immune to store design? According to 2012 CNN article, the way grocery stores arrange their products impacts your purchases. They cite a 2009 study that showed the products at the end of the aisles account for a third of all sales in supermarkets. This could be because people are visually attracted to these items and “what shoppers look at the longest is the strongest predictor of what they will buy," explains Deborah Cohen, MD, and Susan Babey, MD, who co-authored a New England Journal of Medicine article on the subject last year.

4.

Be patient.

This important bit of advice is from my mom: never buy something the first time you see it. Wait, walk around and come back later. She generally uses this for big purchases such as cars or appliances, but it works for other items as well. Those shoes may look great today, but when you come back tomorrow, you may realize that, in better light, they are awful. This can also give you time to look up coupons, compare prices and do quality research. If you don’t find yourself haunted by the incomplete purchase, you may not really need that item after all.

5.

Give in to the impulse.

When my mother-in-law is in a compulsive shopping mood, she heads to a dollar or thrift store. Take $10 with you and then spend as long as possible debating the qualities of aluminum roasters or scrappy paperbacks.

Buying a piece of nonsense now and then, provided it only costs a dollar, always fully satisfies my shopping urge, and I don’t break the bank. If I’m lucky, I might even find something amazing.

So, as you head into the post-holiday, non-shopping season, be frugal and careful. You don’t want to waste time trying to find room for another cupcake maker or industrial-sized can of mayonnaise. 

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41

SASSY

real life

Technology Overboard!

By Noelle Elliott

I

recently lost my iPhone. The panic that ensued after discovering this was equivalent to realizing your dog escaped the backyard. I ransacked the house, only to find that my son had placed it in the galley of his pirate ship. He is two and doesn’t speak well, but maybe this was his attempt to send me a message.

I have become a slave to my phone. It is, after all, the motherboard of all communication for my family. I have our calendars synced on iCloud, my three email accounts are linked as well as Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Instagram.

I carry it with me to every room in fear that I might miss something. Not a phone call, mind you – I rarely use it for its intended purpose – but a status update, text or a funny photo.

Everywhere you look, individuals are preoccupied with their smart phones, publicly disconnected to remain cyber-connected. I am guilty of this too. It sounds ridiculous, but it’s true: I am addicted to my iPhone, and it appears that I am not alone. A U.K. study sponsored by the digital security company SecurEnvoy showed that more and more people are becoming nomophobic.

(Nomophobia [no-mobile phone] is the fear of being without one’s phone.)

I have become reliant on something that just five years ago I knew nothing about. I work forty hours a week at a job that is important but not lifesaving. In other words, if I do not respond to a message out of the designated 8 AM to 5 PM timeframe, no lives will be lost.

My nine-year-old son is a budding author. As he was reading me the twentieth version of the same story about zombies, I decided to check my phone. I was so preoccupied with an email, I didn’t notice he had stopped reading and was staring at me. I glanced up, and seeing the disappointment on his face was enough to fill my guilt bank for another week. I would never ignore my boss to read an email from my husband, but I am willing to ignore people I love most.

As a working mother, I have turned to social media in an attempt to stay connected to the mainstream. I have little time to socialize and Facebook has allowed me to feel part of something that somewhat resembles a social life. I can put my best self forward for the world to see. Marketing companies are very aware of this trend and are honing in on our need for instant visual stimulation.

Grant Stoner, Social Media and Content Specialist at Avery Dennison Corporation in Pasadena said, “Over the past several years, we are seeing a trend in social media that is geared much more toward visual expression. Pinterest is the fastest growing platform right now, and Facebook's new Timeline feature along with their purchase of Instagram only reinforces that. That means as marketers, we have to learn to tell our stories in a more visual way, which is completely changing the game.”

We are lucky to live in an age in which we can use a handheld device to do just about anything. However, there needs to be balance to stay connected without being disconnected from a tangible life.

Screen-Free Nights

This is beneficial for everyone in the family. Designate one or two screen-free nights per week. It sounds crazy, but once implemented, can be a nice reprieve from stress. When I first tried this, I found myself sneaking into the bathroom with my phone. Once I discovered I wasn’t missing anything, I decided to turn it off. We spend our screen-free nights with a long dinner and conversation.

Set Boundaries

When I began my job five years ago, I responded to work emails at all hours. I wanted to be perceived as a hard worker. What this did was set in place the notion that I am available around the clock. Now, if I don’t respond to an email sent to me on a Saturday morning until Monday, panic ensues. It is perfectly acceptable to only respond to messages during your work hours.

Set this as a firm standard early in your career and people will respect it and, in turn, respect you.

TH E J O R DAN WAY

Use Technology as a Tool to Enhance Your Life, Not Live It

I have been known to give my two-year-old son my iPhone to play Toddler Teasers to defuse a tantrum in the cereal aisle at the grocery store. Sure, I may get dirty looks from older women but if they had this technology in their day they would have done the same thing. Find apps that will help with your everyday tasks.

Know When and Where to Use It

Do not put others in jeopardy to check your phone.

Make a vow to never text and drive, and create a consequence with your family if you break this rule.

Be considerate to the person you are with: checking your phone while at lunch with a friend sends the message that they are not important.

Before you become overloaded with technology, step back and remember that it will always be there. But the things that matter most in life are the ones you can’t find with an app. 

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43

SASSY

real life

Winter Driving: Don’t Be a Jerk

By Amberly E. Nichols, LCSW

W

e all have one: that friend who perkily declares that she “just can’t wait for the first magical snowfall of the season.” Maybe it’s just me, but I always secretly want to punch that friend because when I hear “snowfall”, I’m generally not thinking about snuggling around a fireplace with eggnog. I am, instead, quivering with dread as I imagine that first white-knuckled commute to work as I try to keep my vehicle from careening into a ditch. Or, you know…another car.

Get Defensive!

“When it comes to cold weather driving, especially around the first snow and ice of the season, people have forgotten how to drive in it,” states Michael Hershberger, officer for the Elkhart City Police Department. “They don’t leave enough space to stop safely, take turns too fast, and generally fail to drive defensively.” He goes on to say that, besides looking out for your own driving, you must always think about what the other drivers on the road may do. “Hit your own brakes sooner so that the cars behind you know you’re going to stop ahead. Always keep an eye out behind you for someone going too fast or sliding.” He also recommends watching out for potential escape routes to another lane or shoulder, should that be needed. Finally, Hershberger cautions us to keep in mind that, “Just because a stop light is red or there’s a stop sign in front of you, don’t assume the other guy will see it. Or, even if they do, that they won’t just slide right through it. Stop short of the intersection just in case someone goes careening through.”

Don’t Panic!

Jenny Robor, a casualty adjuster for Allstate Insurance, states that one of the major problems she sees is that people start to panic at the slightest skid. “They really panic and hit the brakes.” This may turn a slight skid into a major accident since you have to PUMP the brakes on an icy road. This is important not only when braking out of a skid, but also when simply coming to any stop on the ice. “You’d be surprised how many people think they can stop normally, especially with a stick shift”.

44 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

Be Prepared!

Of course there is always the chance that, despite your best efforts at staying safe, you may find yourself the victim of a fender bender or stuck by the side of the road. The American Red Cross recommends that you have a small store of items in your vehicle in the event that help is not immediately available.

Some of those items listed on their website include: • Extra drinking water • High protein snacks • Flashlight • Battery-powered or hand-crank radio (NOAA Weather Radio, if possible) • Extra batteries • First aid kit • Multi-purpose tool • Cell phone with chargers • Family and emergency contact information • Extra cash • Emergency blanket In addition, they recommend preventing your vehicle’s gas tank from getting too low.

Here’s to a safe and warm winter driving season for all of us! Once I’ve gotten home from work SAFELY, I may even try to rustle up some appreciation for the beauty of a snowy evening. 

SAS SY | FEBRUARY 2013

45

The

Datebook

f e b r u a ry 2 0 1 3

February 2013 Events

The following listing includes events around town.

Always call ahead for updates.

All February A Trip Through the Studebaker Factory

3Twin City Players presents “Shakespeare in 8Shrek&the 9Musical

The Studebaker National Museum's “A Trip Through the Studebaker Factory” exhibit replicates a Studebaker factory tour through images from the Museum’s Archives. Visitors can see how Studebaker’s South Bend plant appeared during its peak period in the early 1950s and the methods and materials used to build Studebaker automobiles. 10 AM to 5 PM. For more information, call 574.235.9714.

Twin City Players Playhouse, St Joseph Charter Township, MI

Studebaker National Museum, South Bend, IN

Nancy D'Isa Turner Exhibit

The Foundry in Eddy Street Commons, Notre Dame

Nancy D'Isa Turner has paintings of landscapes, flowers and portraits on exhibit (upstairs in Suite 106, just south of 5 Guys Burgers and Fries.) Nancy's art depicts area scenes as well as those from recent trips to New England and Ireland. She is a Professor of Education at Saint Mary's College and a member of the St. Joseph Valley Watercolor Society. 9 AM to 5 PM. For more information, call 574.232.1400.

1-3 Unnecessary Farce (Closing Weekend) South Bend Civic Theatre, South Bend

This new spin on classic farcical setups will have you laughing your pants off! Take two inept cops, a sexy accountant, a scaredy-cat security agent and a Scottish hit man complete with kilt and bagpipes and you have the ingredients for pure zaniness! For tickets or more information, visit www.sbct.org or call 574.234.1112.

1Meet Me in the Gallery

South Bend Museum of Art, Century Center

The South Bend Museum of Art and 88.1 WVPE invite you to mingle in the Warner Gallery and enjoy the jazzy Merrimans with Jim Steele as we celebrate the opening of the Scholastic Art Awards Exhibition, showcasing the region's best junior and high school artists. Refreshments available. $5; Children 12 and under FREE. 5:30 PM to 9 PM. For more information, call 574.235.9102.

Goshen First Fridays Goshen, Downtown

On the First Friday of every month - throughout the year - businesses, artists, and entertainers throw a party in downtown Goshen. St. Valentine’s promotions, dining deals and movies at the Goshen Theater: a beautiful, historic vaudeville theater that has been the showpiece of Main Street since 1907.

Enjoy a night on the town with dinner, shopping, and a free movie at this historic venue. 5 PM to 8 PM. 48 FEBRUARY 2013 | SASSY

Hollywood”

The 1930s huge silver screen production of A Midsummer Night's Dream is interrupted by the unexpected arrival of the real Puck and Oberon.

Chaos ensues and soon love is turned upside down throughout the studio. A wild and energetic romantic comedy with a Shakespearean twist. 4 PM.

4Theatre IV presents "Harriet Tubman and the Underground Railroad"

Century Center Bendix Theatre, South Bend, IN

Co-produced by the Black History Museum and Cultural Center of Virginia. This stirring drama with music is a classic tribute to the great American who freed herself and hundreds of her people from the bonds of slavery. Her courage helped to change the world. Share her adventurous life with your students in this accurate and deeply moving musical history lesson. 9:30 AM. For more information, call 574.235.9711.

5Aquacise

Mishawaka High School, Mishawaka, IN

Are you an early bird? Do you like to get in a morning workout before your day begins? Join Mary Ann in an early morning aerobics workout in the pool! 6:45 AM to 7:45 AM. Register at the Battell Community Center.

For more information, call 574.254.7300.

6Anival Fausto's Open Mic and Arts Night Smith's Downtown Tap and Grill, Mishawaka

Artists and Musicians come together in an effort to create culture and happy times! Smith's has continually supported performing arts and will continue to do so.

Artist are welcome to bring, show and sell their work.

Musicians, DJs, Poets and Comedians all welcome.

Ages 21 and up. 9 PM.

7Amy Allen Clark Booksigning Event Our Offices, City Plaza, Granger

Amy Allen Clark's book "A Good Life For Less" will be here -- meet and greet with a national author and with our staff, and enjoy refreshments. Lots of fun, and you won't want to miss it! 4 PM to 6 PM. For more information, call 574.387.5420 or email Stephanie@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com.

Morris Performing Arts Center, South Bend

SHREK THE MUSICAL tells the story of a swampdwelling ogre who goes on a life-changing adventure to reclaim the deed to his land. In a faraway kingdom turned upside down, things get ugly when an unseemly ogre – not a handsome prince – shows up to rescue a feisty princess. Throw in a donkey who won’t shut up, a villain with a SHORT temper, a cookie with an attitude and over a dozen other fairy tale misfits, and you’ve got the kind of mess that calls for a real hero. Luckily, there’s one on hand… and his name is Shrek. For tickets or more information, visit www.morriscenter.org or call 800.537.6415.

8-10 Honk, Jr.

Elkhart Civic Theatre, Bristol

The last of Ida Duck's five eggs emerges with a loud "Honk!" and is one that only a mother could love.

Called Ugly, he is humiliated by his dad and siblings and runs out into the world where he is immediately lost.

How Ugly finds his way to home and self esteem is a classic tale with a solid message for all ages. For more information or tickets, call 574-848-4116 or visit www. elkhartcivictheatre.org.

9th Annual Magical Ice Carving Festival Downtown St. Joseph, St Joseph, MI

New this year: ICE WARS! Watch professional carvers duel it out in 15-minute bouts of ice carving chaos (4 PM – 6PM on Saturday). Professional Ice Carving Competitions: Saturday 10 AM to 3 PM and Sunday 10 AM to 2 PM. Friday's "Street Competition" will begin around 4 PM along State Street. Snow Biz Scavenger Hunt of the logo sculptures - check in at the Welcome Center for your scavenger hunt form. Begins Friday evening and runs through Sunday. FREE. For more information, call 269.985.1111.

9Bob Marley Birthday Bash Goshen Theater, Goshen, IN

Come celebrate the life of Bob Marley with the Original Indika WSG Fada Wayne and Devon Brown. This all-age show will also feature Caribbean food and crafts. 8PM to 1:30 AM (February 10). VIP tickets, reserve seats and food $23.00 & $20.00. For more information, call 574.535.0808.

9Nappanee Second Saturdays Nappanee, Downtown

Visit Nappanee to enjoy lots of affordable family fun - with special activities throughout town.The small

town of Nappanee has teamed together to offer a fun day for all ages. Lots of retail specials, free activities for kids, and more. All day event. For more information, call 574.773.5333.

11 Jazz Open Session with The Merrimans Merrimans' Playhouse, South Bend, IN

It's open to the public and free! Listen, play, woodshed, discuss. Based on Jazz Standards. It's a learning environment. Bring your instrument, your ears, your friends; egos stay at the door. 7:30 PM to 10:30 PM. For more information, call 574.329.3430.

12 Special Q & A with David "Sonny" Lacks

Saint Mary's College: Carroll Auditorium, Madeleva Hall, Notre Dame, IN

Join David "Sonny" Lacks, son of Henrietta Lacks, in a special Q & A as he discusses the information surround Rebecca Skloot's book "The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks". Henrietta's cells, taken without her consent, have been used to further scientific research surrounding cancer, AIDs, gene mapping and countless other pursuits. FREE. 7:30 PM. For more information, call (574) 284-4626.

14 Bethel College presents “Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat”

Bethel College Everest-Rohrer Chapel/Fine Arts Center, Mishawaka, IN

The biblical saga of Joseph and his coat of many colors comes to vibrant life in this delightful musical parable. Joseph, his father's favorite, son is a boy blessed with prophetic dreams. Joseph endures a series of adventures in which his spirit and humanity are continually challenged. Set to an engaging cornucopia of musical styles from country-western and calypso to bubble-gum and rock-n-roll, this Old Testament tale emerges both timely and timeless.

7:30 PM to 10:30 PM. For more information, call 574.807.7080.

15 The Sweetheart Ball

Palais Royale, South Bend

The Sweetheart Ball is an enchanting evening to dance the night away in celebration of exceptional relationships. All proceeds will fund the mission to empower families of medically fragile children at A Rosie Place. 6:30 PM. For more information, call 574.315.6283.

reputation for inspiring performances of baroque and classical music on their period instruments.

Based in London, the orchestra has toured extensively in Europe, the Middle East and the United States under Artistic Director Harry Bicket.

Their Sauder Concert Hall performance will include works by Vivaldi, Purcell and Telemann.

Tickets range from $25 - $45. 7:30 PM. For more information, call 574.535.7000.

Das Dutchman Essenhaus Train Show Das Dutchman Essenhaus, Middlebury

All aboard for a family-friendly fun day! Enjoy a variety of all-gauge operating train displays, repair, seminars, sales and trading. This event has grown since last year and will now offer workshops, clinics and events scheduled throughout the campus.

A complimentary shuttle will also be provided.

9 AM to 3 PM. For more information, visit www. essenhaus.com or call 800.455.9471.

17 Ruthmere Celebrates Downton Abbey Ruthmere Mansion, Elkhart

Ruthmere Mansion provides the perfect setting for experiencing the sights, sounds and tastes of the manor lifestyle. Come dressed as your favorite Downton Abbey character, while enjoying tea, wine, tea sandwiches, scones and the music of the period. Immerse yourself in the Edwardian culture as Gabrielle Robinson and Mike Keen discuss the cuisine, mannerisms and customs of 1920s Europe.

5 PM to 6:30 PM. For more information, call 574.264.0330.

Winter Walk

County-City Building, South Bend, IN

Walk a mile to benefit the women of St. Margaret's House, a day center in South Bend that improves the lives of women who struggle with economic poverty. You may preregister online at www. stmargaretshouse.org or bring your registration form on the day of the walk. Ask your family, friends and co-workers to sponsor you. Prizes will be given to those with the most contributions and to teams with the most walkers. Free. 1:30 PM. For more information, call 574.234.7795.

20 Lecture by Marie Watt

Snite Museum of Art, Notre Dame

Native American artist Marie Watt surveys her assemblages and prints in conjunction with the exhibition Dreams Wiser than Waking: Recent Acquisitions of Native American Prints. Free. 6 PM to 7 PM. For more information, call 574.631.4724.

Mark Brazaitis, 2012 Sullivan Prize Winner

16 Goshen College Performing Arts Series: The English Concert

Goshen College, Goshen, IN

The English Concert is among the finest chamber orchestras in the world, with an unsurpassed

Eck Visitors Center, Notre Dame, IN

Mark Brazaitis is the winner of the 2012 Sullivan Prize from the University of Notre Dame for his collection The Incurables. He is the author of The River of Lost Voices: Stories from Guatemala, which won the Iowa Short Fiction Award, An American Affair: Stories, winner of the George Garrett Fiction Prize from Texas Review Press, the novel Steal My Heart and a collection of poetry, The Other

Language. He is the director of the Creative Writing Program at West Virginia University. Free. 7:30 PM. For more information, call 574.631.7526.

22 Rock Of Ages

Morris Performing Arts Center, South Bend, IN

Tony Award Nominee and American Idol finalist Constantine Maroulis reprises his acclaimed performance when the five-time Tony Award® nominated smash-hit musical Rock of Ages comes to the Morris Center! 7:30 PM. For tickets or more information, call 574.235.9190.

StringFever

The Lerner Theatre, Elkhart

Stringfever consists of four world-class musicians - brothers Giles, Ralph and Neal Broadbent and their cousin, Graham. Originating from the U.K., the brothers and cousin come from a long line of musical talent starting with their grandfather.

However, Stringfever is not a typical string quartet.

The group’s instruments consist of five and six stringed electric violins, a viola and a cello. Their unique choice of instruments coupled with their genetically gifted talent work to create a one-ofa-kind show. Audience members can expect to be taken on a musical journey spanning different musical genres from classical to rock. 7:30 PM to 9:30 PM. For more information, visit www. thelerner.com or call 800.294.8223.

24 Goldberg Variations

Snite Museum of Art, Notre Dame

Pianist Andy Schmidt performs the monumental and captivating keyboard work by Johann Sebastian Bach.

3 PM. For more information, call 574.631.5466.

26 Yoga

Battell Community Center, Mishawaka, IN

This session is centered on creating a safe and mindful practice, using asana and breathing techniques. Arrive early the first day to register and bring a sticky mat. 9 AM to 10 AM. For more information, call 574.258.1667.

27 Author Rebecca Skloot – "The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks"

Saint Mary's College O'Laughlin Auditorium, Notre Dame, IN Henrietta Lacks (HeLa) was a poor Southern tobacco farmer who worked the same land as her slave ancestors, yet her cells – taken without her knowledge – became one of the most important tools in medicine. The first "immortal" human cells grown in culture, they are still alive today, though she has been dead for more than sixty years.

Rebecca Skloot has written more than 200 feature articles, personal essays, book reviews, and news stories. Book-signing to follow. $5 - $10. 7:30 PM. For more information, call 574.284.4626.

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Scene Be Seen

SASSY Magazine promotes Michiana’s cultural offerings, personalities, attractions and local businesses, with a special emphasis on non-profit organizations’ events and activities. We expect this section of SASSY to grow significantly, and we’d like your help to get it rolling!

Please send us some of your favorite photos from your organization’s or charity’s best events and fundraisers.

They just may make the next issue of SASSY Magazine!

We prefer snapshots of people that are full of life and enjoying the moment, so please send them our way: stephanie@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com.

Junior League Holiday 'Hollywood' Ball Just over 300 guests arrived at the Century Center on December 8 for The Junior League of South Bend, Inc.’s ‘Hollywood Ball’.

This was the 85th year since the Inaugural Holiday Ball, an annual event. A red carpet and ‘Walk of Stars’ led the way to the Great Hall. Cocktail hour included a chance to win a ½ carat diamond donated from Van Horne Jewelers, placed inside a filled champagne glass. Paparazzi roamed the hall taking pictures of guests that were later displayed on a large projection screen for people to enjoy. Kathy Seidl received the prestigious Mary Lou Schwartz award. The crowd stayed intrigued as a total of 15 High School Seniors were presented and walked down the elegant stairs with their parents by their sides. After the promenade, while people were starting their salads, the High School Seniors and their families surprised everyone by doing a ‘flash mob’ to Gangnam Style. Sugar High, a band from Chicago kept everyone on the dance floor all evening long. All proceeds from the evening ($30,000) go to benefit Junior League’s projects geared at Early Childhood Education. Thank you to everyone in the community who was able to participate in this outstanding community event!

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The little things are important to us.

When it comes to your newborn’s health and safety, the little things are probably pretty important to you, too. Which is why we offer a Level 2-B Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, along with certified neonatologists and experienced neonatal nurse practitioners right here in our Special Beginnings Maternity Center. This way, you can be sure that should a situation arise, we’ve got the right people in place, ready to help. Because when it comes to watching over your little one, no amount of caring is too big, or too small.

To schedule a personalized tour of the Special Beginnings Maternity Center, call 574-523-3444.

600 East Boulevard • Elkhart, IN 46514