Michigan Golf News, December 3, 2010

Photo courtesy of LochenHeath

LochenHeath Hole No. 16 In This Issue __/

MGN on the Road

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LochenHeath is Back

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A Year in Review, of Sorts......By Terry Moore

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Olympic Golf - Thoughts from Brad and Bill Shelton

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Michael Shiels is Out aned About in Hawaii: By Emily Gail

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Poulter's Blunder the Latest in a Year of Bizarre Rulings: By Doug Ferguson

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Devine Thoughts - the Porch

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Minzey's Musings

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Michigan Golfer Fall Issue http://michigangolfer.com/fall10/

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Michigan Golfer Jan/Feb Issue Preview - Coming December 17 http://michigangolfer.com/jan11/

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New Shows on GLSP

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Michigan Golf Calendar

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Michigan Golfer Archives http://michigangolfer.com/mgn/archives.html

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Michigan Golf History http://michigangolfer.com/mgn/history.html

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Michigan Golf Association Links http://michigangolfer.com/mgn/associations.html

__/__/__/__/__/__/___/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/ __/__/ Michigan Golfer Magazine 2010 Fall Issue http://michigangolfer.com/fall10/ http://michigangolfer.com/#pastissues Past Issues Michigan Golfer Television Michigan Golfer Channel http://michigangolfer.tv Michigan Golfer You Tube Channel http://www.youtube.com/my_videos?pi=0&ps=100&sf=added&sa=0&sq=golfer&dm=2 Michigan Golf News Subscribe http://lyris.dundee.net/read/all_forums/subscribe?name=michigangolfnews Editor: Art McCafferty Associate Editor - Jennie McCafferty __/ __/ __/ __/ __/ __/ __/ __/ __/ __/ __/__/ __/ __/ __/__/ __/ __/__/ __/ __/ __/ ================== MGN ON THE ROAD ================== Grand Rapids - The MGCOA Business Conference We dropped by the MGCOA's welcoming reception to share some hors d'oeuvres, adult beverages and conversation this week.

Obviously, much of the pre meeting conversation dealt with the struggling economy and guesses as to when the turnaround point will occur. Kate Moore, was in good spirits as the membership is up for this year and the conference was sold out on the vendor side.

Bob Koutnik, current MGCOA President and owner of Fox Run CC in Grayling, is completing his second year. He is pointing to the MGCOA Golf Day that is planned for the state legislature on June 22. MGCOA has been a strong lobbyist for the golf industry. This past Tuesday, the board of directors of the MGCOA unanimously acted to send a vote of confidence to the PURE Michigan campaign. They urge all golf course owners, operators and industry supporters to quickly contact their legislators and urge them to vote for funding for this highly effective and extremely critical economic program for our state. With a return on investment of 3 to 1, the proof is clear that this program brings needed revenues to our states tourism industry.

To help you locate your legislator, click on this link http://www.mgcoa.org/news6.html?view=stateofficials&state=MI and enter your zip code.

Eric Rule, is the MGCOA Government Affairs Coordinator and can be reached at errule@mgcoa.org

Phhoto courtesy of LochenHeath

===================== LOCHENHEATH IS BACK =====================

LochenHeath Hole No. 17

Mike Husby has a new golf home, LochenHeath Golf Club, in Williamston, near Traverse City.

Husby, and a group of investors, completed the purchase of this Steve Symers designed course last week. Husby, recently the GM at Candlestone Golf & Resort, has been one of Michigan's most traveled golf professionals and General Managers. His career has taken him to Sugar Springs GC, Michaywe, Marsh Ridge Resort, The Loon GC, Otsego Club, Wild Bluff CC, Candlestone and now LochenHeath.

Husby has also operated Husby Golf http://www.mikehusbygolf.com/ since 1986. His design work has included, Marsh Ridge, The Loon, Wild Bluff and two nine hole projects in the upper peninsula, Newberry GC and Indian Lake GC. Of late, he did a substantial renovation of the Candlestone course.

LochenHeath, opening in 2001, was positioned as a high end golf community which targeted the Traverse City market. Headed up by the popular golf professional, Doug Grove, the course opened to high acclaim. Steve Symers, an architect of national and international stature, created a spectacular course that was highlighted by a number of holes along the shore of East Grand Traverse Bay . At the time of the opening, Symers described the course by saying that, ”The bunkers are dramatic, but it is such a wonderful site that, with the movement of the land and use of native grasses, we kept them pretty basic. There are 69 bunkers and no water hazards.”

The community started off reasonably well, with a number of spectacular homes beginning to rise throughout the complex. Unfortunately, the golf real estate market was beginning to head south and the project ran into financial trouble. The last owners, Arizona-based Pinnacle Development Partners, ran out of money in 2009 and had a number of law suits directed to them for unpaid services.

Wells Fargo, took over the property, and it was them that came to terms with Husby and his group, this past week.

Husby, has begun the process of bringing the course back up to speed. In 2008, Grand Traverse Resort operated the course, but in 2009 and 2010, the course was put on a low maintenance schedule.

While the announcement of the sale was this past week, Husby has been on the property for more than a month, and his maintenance team have made substantial progress in bringing the course back to life.

The Traverse City area has been hard hit by golf course closings in the last decade, Mitchell Creek, High Pointe, Veronica Valley, Matheson Greens and LochenHeath were all victims of Michigan's difficult economic environment.

Hopefully, the rebirth of LochenHeath is a sign that the economy has bottomed out is on the way back. The recent news of GM and Chrysler now hiring, is exciting news.

LochenHeath Website : http://lochenheath.com Video: http://tiny.cc/k4txr ========================================== A YEAR IN REVIEW, OF SORTS......By Terry Moore ========================================== With my clubs now stored in the basement, it’s the time of year when I reflect on some of the highlights and personal favorites of the past golf year.

Best bounce back: You know about “bounce back.” It’s a stat used on the PGA Tour that tracks the success of a player coming back from a bogey or worse with a birdie on the next hole. Well, it will be

hard to beat the bounce back of McKenzie Rupp, a senior from Essexville Garber H.S. at Oct.’s Michigan High School Girls Golf Finals at The Meadows at GVSU. Competing in some tough windy conditions, she incurred a horrendous 16-over par 21 on the par-five ninth hole (her second hole of the day.) But to her credit, MacKenzie composed herself and birdied the next hole, the par-four 10th hole—a unparallel bounce back of 18 shots!

Best Michigan tournament: My pick is the USGA Junior Amateur held at Egypt Valley in July. The caliber of play of these budding Tour stars was remarkable. I watched phenom Jordan Speith, 16, shoot an effortless 5-under 67 in his first round over a stretched to the tips Egypt Valley CC, not an easy track. Later, Gavin Hall,15, set a new course and USGA Jr. record by firing a 10-under 62. Then Jimmy Liu, 14, erased Tiger Woods’ name from the record books when he became the youngest USGA champion by besting Justin Thomas 4 & 2 in the finals. It was an amazing week of exceptional play and a historic week for West Michigan as it hosted its first ever USGA national championship. It was worth the wait.

Best drive: No, it’s not Steve Stricker’s 424-yard blast at Kapalua’s Plantation course at the opening Tournament of Champions. Instead, the best drive of the year goes to ’10 Michigan Senior Amateur champion Bill Zylstra. You see, Zylstra claimed his trophy at Barton Hills at around 6 P.M. one evening and then promptly drove alone and straight through to Charleston, SC in order to defend his title at another senior event beginning at noon the next day. He safely made the13-hour drive and carded a 71 in his first round, two shots off the lead.

Best retort to a player’s complaint: Loved how USGA Executive Director David Fay handled Tiger Woods whining about the greens at Pebble Beach. “Someone is entitled to his opinions, but he’s not entitled to his facts,” said Fay echoing a favorite line of the late Senator Patrick Moynihan. Fay went on to explain that although the poa annua greens at Pebble may have appeared in poor condition, they in fact rolled fine and probably better than any tournament ever held there in June. In contrast, Phil Mickelson didn’t make any excuses for his poor putting over those same greens.

Most gut-wrenching loss: Goes to Robert Garrigus who, mimicking Jan Van de Velde at Carnoustie at the Open Championship, blew a three shot lead at Memphis in June by triple bogeying the final hole, costing him his first PGA Tour title. Readily admitting the pressure got to him, Garrigus vowed afterwards to learn from his travails. The next day, Tony Kornheiser on ESPN’s PTL show predicted Garrigus would never win a tournament.

Most gratifying win: Goes to Robert Garrigus who wins his first ever PGA victory by firing a final round 64 at the Children’s Miracle Network Classic in Nov. at DisneyWorld. Afterwards in a TV interview, Garrigus dedicates the win to “Tony Kornheiser.” Touché!

Most under-reported golf achievement: Goes to 59-year-old Paul Simson from Raleigh, N.C. who won the Senior “triple crown” this year, taking home titles in the British, Canadian and USGA Senior Amateur championships.

Best item for tournament viewing: A pocket-size pair of binoculars. I used Bushnell’s lightweight PowerView model at Whistling Straits for the PGA and they worked beautifully. Handy too for watching college football action at The Big House in Ann Arbor. I used them to zero in on several missed field goals!

Best lines by an agronomist: Goes to Dr. Greg Lyman, Director of Environmental Programs for the Golf Course Superintendents Association of America for: “This summer’s been great for corn—a hot weather grass—but not for Michigan golf courses.” Lyman succinctly explained that bent grasses found on courses are ‘cool weather’ grasses and can’t withstand long stretches of hot humid weather as we experienced this summer. Lyman ended by saying, “Remember, we’re playing this game on top of a plant.”

Best 19th hole outside Michigan: Goes to Palm Springs’ Indian Wells Golf Resort whose expansive clubhouse includes a second floor outdoor patio area overlooking the golf course and the scenic mountain ranges. With a gas fire pit as a conversational centerpiece, one couldn’t find a better spot to marvel at the surroundings while rehashing the scorecard and sipping a cold one.

Best post-event Press conference: No press conference offered more compelling theatre than did the losing USA team at the Ryder Cup. The emotion displayed by dejected Hunter Mahan followed by the stellar support given him by his team mates spoke volumes about camaraderie and the Ryder Cup itself. Can’t wait for Medinah in 2012!

Best Instructional DVD: Goes to Phil Mickelson’s Secrets of the Short Game. Excellent production values, lively and smart advice, and a ready maxim for better chips, “hinge and hold.”

Best golf flap resolution: Goes to PING’s John Solheim who wisely stepped in over the controversial squared groove wedge flap brought unwisely to the forefront by Phil Mickelson’s use of it earlier this year. It was an unnecessary distraction for golf already reeling from a stagnant economy and Tiger Woods’ downfall. Kudos to Solheim for putting out the fire by allowing the PGA Tour to finally ban the club.

Best use of golf for economic development: Goes to the Golf Club at Harbor Shores in Benton Harbor.

The Jack Nicklaus-designed layout is the centerpiece of an ambitious and community-minded development project aimed at revitalizing the area through the combined efforts of three non-profits: Whirlpool Foundation, Cornerstone Alliance and the Consortium of Community Development. Three cheers! By the way, the exhibition in August by Nicklaus, Arnold Palmer, Tom Watson and Johnny Miller was a first-class opener.

======================================================== OLYMPIC GOLF - THOUGHTS FROM BRAD AND BILL SHELTON ======================================================== GOLF IS THE OLYMPIC IDEAL: By: Brad Shelton After more than a century’s absence, golf has been approved by the International Olympic Committee (IOC) and will return as an Olympic sport at the 2016 summer games in Rio de Janeiro. What exactly the competition will comprise is yet unknown. However, the International Golf Federation (IGF) has proposed a format of 72-hole, individual stroke play for both men and women with a field of 60 players for each competition using the Official World Golf Rankings as a method of determining eligibility. Beyond the top 15, players would be eligible based on the world rankings, with a maximum of two eligible players from each country that does not already have two or more players among the top 15.

Golf, a sport that embodies the true spirit of Olympic competition and olympism (a term coined by Frenchman Pierre de Coubertin in 1894, uses sport to promote the balanced development of people as an essential step in building a peaceful society that places a high value on human dignity), will again take its rightful position in the oldest and most prestigious international, multi-sport event in the world.

What better sport than golf to demonstrate olympism? Golf is a worldwide sport that lends itself to the highest level of competition – there are more than 31,000 courses with more than 50 million golfers across the globe. With no intent to discount the contributions of women in the sport, golf is known as the “gentleman’s sport”, which by definition implies peace, fairness, honesty, and human dignity – all qualities needed for a peaceful society.

There are still questions about who will be allowed to participate – should it be limited to amateurs or should the IOC take the same course as basketball, hockey, and other sports permitting professionals compete? My personal opinion is that it should be limited to amateurs and be a team event. But, regardless of who competes, golf truly embodies the Olympic Ideal and should be a part of the games every four years.

Detractors will argue that golf is already an international sport and does not need a place in the Olympics to establish another Solheim, Ryder, Walker, or Presidents Cup. Of course, the detractors are correct that golf is already a recognized world sport with many well-known, popular competitions that pair international competitors. But so does gymnastics, ice-skating, swimming, and cycling - and all of these sports are Olympic sports.

Let’s take the advice and direction of the recognized leaders in golf such as Greg Norman, Tiger Woods, Padraig Harrington, and Ernie Els, and add golf as a permanent event in the summer games.

Including golf under the Olympic Rings can only enhance the game we all love, and will continue the growth of the game for years to come that these professionals and many others in golf have worked so hard to establish. I am sure each of these players display their Claret Jug, Wannamaker Trophy, or

Masters Trophy prominently in their trophy case, and it would be hard to imagine an Olympic gold medal would not be on par with each of their lifetime golf accomplishments. **** GOLF IN THE OLYMPICS -TOO MUCH OF A GOOD THING! : By: Bill Shelton Golf will become an Olympic competition in the 2016 games due primarily to the advocacy of several golf “celebrities” and numerous golf organizations. There has been a plethora of arguments both pro and con about the appropriateness of the sport as an Olympic competition. The bottom line however is that competitive golf will be on the agenda at the 2016 games in Rio de Janeiro. Golf should NOT be an Olympic sport and perhaps including it is the best way to prove its inappropriateness.

Golf in the Olympics is not an entirely new idea. In the 1900 Paris games and the 1904 games in St. Louis, there were golf matches and golf medals were awarded. However, the matches were viewed as more of a “sideshow” or exhibition than international competition. In fact, the only participants in the 1904 Olympics were from the United States and Canada. It was not successful then and it will not be successful a century later.

A few decades ago, the argument to include golf in the games may have limited justification due to the scarcity of international competition as part of the regular tour schedules. A quick review of the PGA, Senior PGA, LPGA, and Nationwide tour events for 2011 clearly indicates that shortcoming has been addressed. Admittedly most of the events are individual competitions but a stage is provided for the best players in the world to compete. The existing team competitions such as the Ryder, Solheim, President’s, and Walker Cup already provide ample opportunities for experiencing the thrill of representing one’s country as part of a team.

The failure of golf to be successful in the Olympics will be attributed to several factors. First, logistically it will be a staging nightmare. Golf courses require a substantial land area for new construction but even using an existing course will be a major undertaking in course preparation, staffing, crowd control (although they may not be much of crowd) and media coverage. As opposed to an event such as swimming or track where ticketholders attend discrete competitive events of one to two hours, team golf can extend up to five or six hours per match. Most persons attending the Olympics want to experience a range of competitions during the visit. From a television perspective, golf does not lend itself to the Olympic format of quickly moving from one venue to another. At best, it will be a choppy presentation.

Second, the major golf manufacturers have little need to commit substantial resources to the competition. Between the individual tours and the existing international team competitions, the additional exposure from the Olympics hardly justifies the expenditures. Television viewers who enjoy golf (and would supposedly watch the games) already are familiar with the names Titleist, Taylormade, Callaway, and other brands on bags, shirts, hats, and balls. In today’s world, if someone can watch the Olympics games on television, in all probability they can watch professional golf

coverage. This is not about Speedos and snowboards.

Third, the existing international team competition is more than sufficient to satisfy the fans’ appetite.

Equally important, the competitions are firmly established and will totally overshadow the significance of the Olympic matches. There are no track competitions, swimming and diving events, or gymnastic meets that come close to the level of competition found in the Olympic Games. In golf that will not be the case. Will the Olympics matches be viewed as more important than the Ryder, Solheim, or Walker Cups? Absolutely not!

Finally, after a few (perhaps one) competitions, the superstars of golf will not participate in the matches. For players such as Tiger, Ernie, Phil, Lee and a host of others, their schedules are as full as they allow. So, at best, the competition will be composed of second and third tier players. Without the name recognition factor, the event will quickly become meaningless. And, yes, money is a factor for the professionals. Many international tournaments pay huge appearance fees in addition to the purse.

Is the answer then to limit competition to amateurs? It can’t happen as was proven many Olympic games ago.

Golf is a great sport and continues to expand into the international arena. Greg Norman has long been a leader in trying to extend the tours worldwide. He was right and should be justifiably proud of the result. But, the Olympic Games will experience a double bogey for this experiment. ====================================================== MICHAEL SHIELS IS OUT AND ABOUT IN HAWAII: By Emily Gail ====================================================== Michael recently appeared on the Emily T Gail Show, that was broadcast from Restaurant #3 at Mauna Kea Resort s in Hawaii.

Shiels is the author of Secrets of the Great Golf Course Architects, a wonderful coffee table book in which he collaborated with over 100 golf course architects. He wrote Golf’s Short Game for Dummies, Don’t Tell’em Where I Am, Good Bounces and Bad Lies, the autobiography of Ben Wright and he collaborated on "My Dad and Me" (with Larry King) and with Donald Trump on "Donald Trump's Best Golf Advice I Ever Received” .

For those who were fans of Detroit’s WJR’s JP McCarthy he was JP’s producer for many years and authored the J. P. McCarthy story, "Don’t Tell’em Where I Am", which was a number-one regional bestseller with proceeds going to charity.

His articles and columns about golf have appeared worldwide in magazines and newspapers.

Shiels was in Hawaii on a media tour with his son Harrison and his wife Christine Tenagelia, “Dentist to the Stars” in Michigan. The nice things he will have to say about their visit to the Big Island of Hawaii will no doubt be featured at http://Traveltattler.com .

Note: Emily Gail, was long a fixture in Detroit, with her "Say Nice Things About Detroit' campaign and hosting of some of Detroit's largest road races. A gifted golfer in her youth, she attempted, without out much success, to gain admission to the Furture's Tour. She now hosts a weekly golf radio show in Hawaii. You might also note, that her brother, Max, was a fixture on the long running tv show, Barney Miller. ========================================================================== POULTER'S BLUNDER THE LATEST IN A YEAR OF BIZARRE RULINGS: By Doug Ferguson ========================================================================== "The Rules of Golf are under review, and Ian Poulter has a suggestion.

It involves a player who tries to replace his ball on the putting green, only for it to slip out of his hands just inches above the ground and land on his marker – a lucky coin, in this case – and move it ever so slightly.

There was no intent for the marker to move. There was no advantage to be gained.

But there was a one-stroke penalty.

“It puts the focus on another stupid rule,” Poulter said.

No doubt he could find a few other colleagues wanting to tweak the Rules of Golf, which will next be amended for 2012.

Brian Davis was docked two shots in a playoff at Hilton Head when his club ticked a loose reed in a waste area to the left of the 18th. Juli Inkster was penalized for swinging a club with a weight attached to stay loose during a delay. And who will ever forget Dustin Johnson not realizing he was in a bunker at the PGA Championship, going from a playoff to a tie for fifth after his two-shot penalty?"

More: http://www.thegolfchannel.com/tour-insider/poulters-blunder-latest-year-bizarre-rulings-40539/ Taken from the Golf Channel website. ================================= DEVINE THOUGHTS - THE PORCH ================================= A young blonde girl in her late teens, wanting to earn some extra money for the summer, decided to hire herself out as a "handy woman" and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood.

She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.

"Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint the porch" he said. "How much will you charge me?"

Delighted, the girl quickly responded, "How about $50?"

The man agreed and told her that the paint and brushes and everything she would need were in the garage.

The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her goes ALL the way around the house?"

husband, "Does she realize that our porch

"That's a bit cynical, isn't it?" he responded.

The wife replied, "You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe all those dumb blonde jokes."

A few hours later the blonde came to the door to collect her money.

"You're finished already??" the startled husband asked.

"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I even had paint left over so I gave it two coats."

Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50 and handed it to her along with a $10 tip.

"Thank you," the blonde said, "And, by the way, it's not a Porch, it's a Lexus." ================= MINZEY'S MUSINGS ================= ABOUT THE WRITER Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.

Colonoscopy Journal: I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy.

A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis.

Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner.

I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!' I left Andy's office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called 'MoviPrep,'

which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America 's enemies.

I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous.

Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began mypreparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn't eat any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basicallywater, only with less flavor.

Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder together in a oneliterplastic jug, then you fill it with lukewarm water. (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a liter is about 32 gallons). Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes - and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon.. .

The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose, watery bowel movement may result..'

This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground..

MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but, have you ever seen a spaceshuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.

After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep.

The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I spurt on Andy?' How do you apologize to a friend for something like that?

Flowers would not be enough.

At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked..

Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand. Ordinarily I would have

fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep.

At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought of this, but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode. You would have no choice but to burn your house.

When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around there somewhere.. I was seriously nervous at this point.

Andy had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand.

There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by ABBA. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' had to be the least appropriate.

'You want me to turn it up?' said Andy, from somewhere behind me.

'Ha ha,' I said And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.

I have no idea. Really. I slept through it. One moment, ABBA was yelling 'Dancing Queen, feel the beat of the tambourine,' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood.

Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt excellent. I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that IT was all over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been prouder of an internal organ.

On the subject of Colonoscopies...

Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were quite humorous..... A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies: 1. 'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!'

2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet?'

3. 'Can you hear me NOW?' 4. 'Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?'

5. 'You know, in Arkansas , we're now legally married.'

6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?'

7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out...'

8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!'

9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!'

10. 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.'

11. 'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?'

12. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?' ======================================= MICHIGAN GOLFER MAGAZINE FALL ISSUE ======================================= Contents http://michigangolfer.com/fall10/ Senior Tournaments Put Michigan Golf Back on the Map: By Jack Berry Michigan Tournament Round Up with Tim Hygh Strom Storms From Behind to Win Women’s Michigan Open Andy Matthews Wins Over Fouch and Do at the Tournament of Champions Brehm Wins Second Michigan Open at Orchard Lake CC Ron Beurmann Wins PGA Championship at Eagle Eye Teaching Pros Compete with the Touring Pros: By Brad Shelton Dyebolical: By Jack Berry The Golf Club at Harbor Shores Grand Opening: By BR Koehnemann For Pete’s Sake, Enough is Enough: By Bill Shelton Manitou Passage: Rebirth of King's Challenge: By Terry Moore Michigan Golfer Fall Issue http://michigangolfer.com/fall10/ Past Issues 1996 - 2010 http://michigangolfer.com/#pastissues ======================================================= MICHIGAN GOLFER JAN/FEB ISSUE - COMING DECEMBER 17 ======================================================= Contents Top 10 Michigan Golf Stories for 2010 - Jack Berry Top Michigan High School Teams and Who is Hot for 2011 - Kelly Hill Calvin College and Concordia University Golf Programs - Chris Lewis Michigan's Award Winners for 2010 - Bernice Phillips Top 10 Michigan Golf Courses Top 10 Shakers and Movers in Michigan Golf - Art McCafferty Top 10 Michigan Golf Schools and Academies - Wilma Nathaniel Top 10 Michigan Golf Television Shows - Herschel Corey Michigan Golf History - 2006 -2010 - Art McCafferty Slice of Life - Terry Moore

============================= NEW SHOWS ON GLSP NETWORK ============================= Michigan Travel Television Frankfort Film Festival - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O45VjDDnjQA Michigan Skier Television Lake Placid Olympic Winter Games Site - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NirpdgzVvYc Michigan Runner Television Fifth Third Turkey Trot http://michiganrunner.tv/2010_53turkeytrot/ Run Thru Hell on Halloween - http://michiganrunner.tv/2010runthruhell/ Marathon Oasis de Montreal - http://michiganrunner.tv/2010montreal/ GoodLife Fitness Victoria Marathon - http://runningcanada.tv/2010victoria/ Metro Health Grand Rapids Marathon - http://michiganrunner.tv/2010grandrapidsmarathon/ Manistee National Cross Country Invitational http://michiganrunner.tv/2010manistee_xc/ ============================= 2010 MICHIGAN GOLF CALENDAR ============================= DECEMBER 1-2 Michigan Golf Business Conference and Vendor Fair, Amway Grand Plaza Hotel, Grand Rapids http://www.mgcoa.org JANUARY 14-16 Columbus Golf Show, Columbus http://www.northcoastgolfshows.com/ FEBRUARY 11-13 West Michgan Golf Show, Grand Rapids http://www.showspan.com/WMG/Home.aspx 18-20 Cleveland Golf Show, Cleveland http://www.northcoastgolfshows.com/ 25-27 Lansing Golf Show, Lansing http://michigangolfshow.com/lansing/ 25-27 Chicago Golf Show, Chicago http://www.chicagogolfshow.com/ 25-27 Indianapolis Golf Show, Indianapolis http://www.northcoastgolfshows.com/ MARCH 4-6 Michigan Golf Show, Novi http://michigangolfshow.com/

26-27 The Mid Michigan Golf Show, Birch Run Expo Center, http://orvshows.com MAY 24-29 Senior PGA Valhalla Golf Club, Louisville, KY JUNE 20-26 LPGA Futures Tour - Island Resort Championship at Sweetgrass http://www.sweetgrassgolfclub.com 21-25 Michigan Amateur, Boyne Highlands, Boyne City http://gam.org/ AUGUST 08-14 PGA Championship, Atlanta Athletic Club, Atlanta, GA